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Speaker 1: Hey, hey, Hey, we're back.

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Speaker 2: We're black brand ambition and thisish and this hey many girl.

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Speaker 3: Well now that it's cool to be country, I think

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Speaker 3: I'm just going to bring out I think Mandy, I

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Speaker 3: think Amandalali is going to make an appearance this podcast, y'all,

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Speaker 3: because y'all, Queen Bee got me wanting to put on

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Speaker 3: my boots and find a cowboy hat that'll fit this

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Speaker 3: head of hair and hit the tooth stepping? Is that

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Speaker 3: what you call? Poor Usher? Can we just more Usher?

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Speaker 3: Do they have beef? Why would she do that to

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Speaker 3: that man?

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Speaker 2: I know? Well, I will say as first time, I

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Speaker 2: was concerned that Twitter like Usher had like like two

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Speaker 2: million I guess like impressions or like you know, like

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Speaker 2: comment and she had like about a million. So people

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Speaker 2: are still giving him his due.

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Speaker 3: I mean Spotify, she's like the one. Her songs were

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Speaker 3: top of the charts you expect after the Super Bowl.

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Speaker 3: By the way, Usher, he's laid like it was. I

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Speaker 3: loved it. I had so much fun, which is probably

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Speaker 3: why my hip is really tight today because I was

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Speaker 3: getting down with the elder millennials at the at the

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Speaker 3: at the at the Homie rap. But yeah, he did amazing.

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Speaker 3: But I thought, oh, I'm going to spend Monday morning,

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Speaker 3: like you know, listening to old Usher, and no, I

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Speaker 3: spent it memorizing the words to sixteen Carriages and Texas

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Speaker 3: Hold Them. I want to say.

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Speaker 2: You know, Beyonce was like, sorry, but I'm going to

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Speaker 2: use the super Bowl all attention came to. They paid

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Speaker 2: her to do a commercial and she was like, thanks

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Speaker 2: for this thirty million dollars worth of promo.

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Speaker 3: I mean, there's never nothing done half assed. I mean

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Speaker 3: we saw her. Look at the Grammys. I don't know

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Speaker 3: if you saw that she had on like she's been

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Speaker 3: doing the whole I mean, obviously there's been a horse

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Speaker 3: has been the motif of renaissance and all that. I'd forgotten.

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Speaker 3: There was supposed to be three acts, Act one, Act two, whatever,

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Speaker 3: So yeah, I had totally forgotten. But when she came

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Speaker 3: out and for those I don't know, where are you

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Speaker 3: living under a rock? I mean it's Wednesday, you guys

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Speaker 3: should be up on it by now. But at the

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Speaker 3: super Bowl, what happened was was it after the halftimes?

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Speaker 3: I think was just after the halftime show, maybe just

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Speaker 3: before anyway, Verizon ad comes on. It's all about Beyonce

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Speaker 3: talking about I'm gonna break the Internet. At the end

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Speaker 3: of it, she's like drop the new music. They're ready,

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Speaker 3: and literally at the same time, Instagram and x Twitter

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Speaker 3: start blowing up because she's posted on ig that her

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Speaker 3: new album is coming out in March twenty ninth. Not

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Speaker 3: just that, but here's two new tracks, and not just that,

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Speaker 3: but here is the sexiest cowgirl like artwork photography you're

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Speaker 3: ever going to see, Like get your lives together, and

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Speaker 3: you know, forget about this whole football game.

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Speaker 2: I will say whoever is on her, whatever the NBA says,

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Speaker 2: it must say, we will take your ear, your eye

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Speaker 2: because no nothing ever leaks, not.

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Speaker 3: Your grandchildren will feel all right.

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Speaker 2: I mean I mean Beyonce literally tape. Remember she did

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Speaker 2: the art What was the one that she were It

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Speaker 2: was the first one. I think it was Lemonade.

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Speaker 3: Say it was self self and Beyonce.

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Speaker 2: Where she dropped it and all the videos, So you

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Speaker 2: need to tell me you recorded. She must have one

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Speaker 2: of those, remember like Men in Black where they had

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Speaker 2: that little thing that erased your memory, because how was it?

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Speaker 2: No extras, no production, nobody says anything beyond not.

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Speaker 3: Even Gary from VIEP. I mean Gary from VIEP took

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Speaker 3: me out. I don't know if y'all ever watch VEEP

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Speaker 3: did if you're not a TV girl, but VIEP was

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Speaker 3: the funniest and Gary played like the the dorky assistant

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Speaker 3: to Julie Juey Louis Dreyfus's vice president character, and the

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Speaker 3: fact that he was next to our queen Bee. I.

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Speaker 3: I just want an interview where he talks about how

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Speaker 3: like what what was that like? And how to Gary

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Speaker 3: even VIEP end up In this commercial the.

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Speaker 2: Girls say nothing a sidebar Happy Valentine's Day?

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Speaker 3: Oh is that going to be? Oh?

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Speaker 2: Your say if you are a little kid, happy Valentine's

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Speaker 2: you know, because it's like Happy Valentine's.

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Speaker 3: Meanwhile, I got an email from Remy's daycare. He's all

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Speaker 3: of eight months. You're eight months old, and they're like,

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Speaker 3: here's the class list if you like to send in

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Speaker 3: Valentine's I'm like, no, Do I get at least another

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Speaker 3: year or two before I have to worry about another

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Speaker 3: one of those? And of course I got ahead of things.

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Speaker 3: I'm looking to my right because somewhere on this shelf

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Speaker 3: are the Valentines that I bought for Rio's class, maybe

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Speaker 3: a couple months ago, and I'm probably gonna forget. I

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Speaker 3: need to like find them because you know how you

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Speaker 3: buy stuff in advance and then you forget where you

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Speaker 3: put it. It's also my grandpa who has been He

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Speaker 3: passed away in two thousand and seven. He would be

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Speaker 3: ninety five. On the day we were recording on the twelfth,

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Speaker 3: my mom just reminded me, so, hi, Papa, love you

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Speaker 3: and happened. But did you watch the Did you watch

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Speaker 3: the game?

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Speaker 2: Though?

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Speaker 3: Actually watch half just come.

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Speaker 2: I was grateful to the people. I could not figure

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Speaker 2: out how to watch the Usher show because I was like,

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Speaker 2: Who's watching the game?

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Speaker 3: Not me?

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Speaker 2: Because I had just come back from visiting my friend and.

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Speaker 3: So on the way, Honestly, the Usher halftime show would

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Speaker 3: have been a good time before you go visit a friend.

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Speaker 3: I'm just saying, like, I was like, it was bouche

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Speaker 3: a little Afric DJ. Yeah, come back.

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Speaker 2: On the weekend. And then so when I got back,

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Speaker 2: I was like, I'm tired. I thought I was going

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Speaker 2: to go to a Super Bowl party, but I was tired,

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Speaker 2: and I was like, I just watched the Usher show,

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Speaker 2: but I could not figure out how to watch it. It

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Speaker 2: was not playing on YouTube. It was not playing, but

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Speaker 2: God blessed the people. It was a young woman who

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Speaker 2: set up her phone so I could watch her TV

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Speaker 2: or her laptop.

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Speaker 3: And it was me and.

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Speaker 2: Twenty other people. Yeah no Instagram, Me and twenty other

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Speaker 2: people just get saying, you are doing the Lord's work.

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Speaker 2: So I'm just in there like gus, watching like a

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Speaker 2: video of her video, which was it was amazing, because like,

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Speaker 2: where am I going to watch it? I'm missing it.

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Speaker 3: It was on Paramount, wasn't it.

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Speaker 2: I don't know cha. I was clicking all the things.

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Speaker 2: I don't remember my log into none of my I

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Speaker 2: think I said, you.

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Speaker 3: Know what, you were not pared.

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Speaker 2: I went on to Instagram and someone said I got you.

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Speaker 2: She literally was like, yeah, I'm gonna She was so

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Speaker 2: cute because she was like, although I'm excited, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to try to keep my voice down so you guys

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Speaker 2: can hear. So I mean, a gem of a gem.

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Speaker 2: It was just excellent, and I just want to thank her.

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Speaker 2: I don't remember her name, but girl, not all not

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Speaker 2: all heroes were capes, you know, some of them pirate

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Speaker 2: videos for us to watch. So I'm just happy about that.

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Speaker 3: Well, it was a little chaotic in the beginning because

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Speaker 3: there was so it was like where's Usher at? He

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Speaker 3: was behind like every performer like there was. It's so

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Speaker 3: it was so different to Rihanna's show because or sorry Rihanna,

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Speaker 3: Rihanna show, because everyone was sort of like monotone. It

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Speaker 3: was the white and then she was red. But with Usher,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, where he at? It's like there's a peacock

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Speaker 3: over there, it's a showgirl. That guy's doing backflips and

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Speaker 3: this the camera's going all over the place. But he

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Speaker 3: did the damn thing. And by the time Luda came out,

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Speaker 3: and I never in my wildest dreams thought I'd be

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Speaker 3: bouncing my baby on my hip and dancing to turn

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Speaker 3: down for what. At the same time, my mind was blown.

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Speaker 3: I was like, am I in college right now? Am

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Speaker 3: I a mom? Like? I don't someone take this baby?

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Speaker 3: He can't be mine. I was just in college.

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Speaker 2: This is crazy.

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Speaker 3: But the nostalgia for the elder millennials was was so real.

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Speaker 3: My older sister loved Usher like, yes, he was everything

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Speaker 3: to her. So we were all very we were trying

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Speaker 3: to observe this day for Mallory my older sister and

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Speaker 3: just like really respect her feelings and make sure that

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Speaker 3: she got her time to digest.

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Speaker 2: Well, what did you think about some of the commercials,

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Speaker 2: the Ghana one?

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Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I remember, Wait what was the Ghana one?

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Speaker 3: Because I saw it like maybe after it started, and

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Speaker 3: I didn't really know what it was for.

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Speaker 2: So it looked like the NFL was saying, Hey, we're

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Speaker 2: going to be having like football camps in Africa. That's

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Speaker 2: what it looked like, okay, And so they was like

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Speaker 2: following this little boy who was like playing football all

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Speaker 2: around like his house, but also to the marketplace, one

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Speaker 2: of the largest marketplaces in a kragana, and you know,

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Speaker 2: everybody basically was like, oh, there he goes Qui just

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Speaker 2: always playing football. But in his mind he was like

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Speaker 2: playing against some of the best guys in the league.

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Speaker 2: So they were his imaginary friends, but they were really there,

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Speaker 2: you know, like going up against like you know, this

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Speaker 2: linebacker or whatever. I don't know the positions. And then

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Speaker 2: afterwards he like, I guess this dog steals his football

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Speaker 2: and it takes him to this field where he sees

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Speaker 2: people practicing football. Because in Africa, like so many other countries, soccer,

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Speaker 2: aka their football is the dominant sport. So he realizes, wow,

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Speaker 2: they're playing football football and he's met with this Nigerian

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Speaker 2: football player named Oci, who I'm assuming used to be

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Speaker 2: a famous football player and says, I know that look,

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Speaker 2: I remember I had that look too. We're here in Africa.

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Speaker 2: I'm interested in American football and basically says this is

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Speaker 2: a camp to like get kids and boys ready to play.

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Speaker 2: So it was really yeah, and there's so many. It

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Speaker 2: was just beautiful to see. Like I saw Bozma, my

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Speaker 2: friend who is an ambassador to to Ghana until former

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Speaker 2: CMO of Netflix. She was like, how beautiful? How you know,

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Speaker 2: like literally to hear my language being spoken on the

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Speaker 2: most prominent marketing stage in the world, right, you know

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Speaker 2: what I mean? Like, So I just was just really beautiful.

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Speaker 2: It was just a really beautifully well done commercial. So

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Speaker 2: that came on. Only reason I sty is because Homegirl

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Speaker 2: was like about to cut off and she's like, wait,

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Speaker 2: let's watch this one commercials together.

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Speaker 3: The girl really impressed that you wanted that you were

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Speaker 3: talking about what I saw because watched usher the commercials.

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Speaker 3: I saw one. Let me go first talk about wanting

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Speaker 3: to be the first person to raise your hand in class.

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Speaker 2: Because he read exactly. I was like, so in the

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Speaker 2: chapter that I read, chapter one, I mean because I

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Speaker 2: heard that. I mean I didn't see, but I heard

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Speaker 2: that the Kindae commercial was ghetto.

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Speaker 3: He basically always chasing my children around. I wouldn't have

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Speaker 3: just taken them to up Laila's house in retrospect, but

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Speaker 3: I was chasing them around. It was a lot. It's

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Speaker 3: a lot of emotions. I have a pandemic baby, and

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Speaker 3: y'all who have pandemic boys and girls out there, when

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Speaker 3: they get in a crowd, it's it's hit or miss.

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Speaker 3: It's like either they're going to be stuck to you

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Speaker 3: and you can't do anything without them, or they're going

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Speaker 3: to be flying free. But no, I did. The one

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Speaker 3: that I saw that really like stuck with me was

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Speaker 3: a Dove commercial. Dove they were our partners last year.

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Speaker 3: Will they continue in it? But they? I mean, you know,

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Speaker 3: but they did this really this really I don't know

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Speaker 3: what's the word it was. It was heart it was touching,

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Speaker 3: but it was also like really sad, and it was

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Speaker 3: about young girls and how because of body confidence issues,

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Speaker 3: because young girls don't like the way that they look

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Speaker 3: or they're self conscious about their bodies. They drop out

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Speaker 3: of sports at such a huge rate. So it was

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Speaker 3: like a twelve year old cliff or something. And I

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Speaker 3: think the Dove angle is that they're going to be

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Speaker 3: doing like body confidence. I mean, that's always been their

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Speaker 3: their thing. It's about loving your body. But this picture

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Speaker 3: of a twelve year old little girl in a swim

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Speaker 3: suit looking at herself in the mirror, and I'm like,

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Speaker 3: ain't that a damn thing? Like I know, it was like,

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Speaker 3: of course I went through that as a kid. I

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Speaker 3: remember her. I wasn't swimming, but I was in the

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Speaker 3: marching band, and even I I was like, I can't

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Speaker 3: wear shorts to the practice because my legs look you know,

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Speaker 3: fat or whatever. And it's just, yeah, that made me sad.

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Speaker 3: And I thought it was really poignant. That's the word. Poignant,

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Speaker 3: kind of like punch you in the gut kind of commercial,

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Speaker 3: but so.

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Speaker 2: Like we're so conscious and like, honestly, there's so much

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Speaker 2: money that's made out of our self deprivation and self

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Speaker 2: consciousness about how we look. You know, it's big business.

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Speaker 2: Like so Amelia, my niece, she's six. The other day

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Speaker 2: she she like baked her mom, I want you to.

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Speaker 2: I want you She used to say, I want hair

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Speaker 2: like Auntie Edo. So y'all know I have a lock.

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Speaker 2: So Amelia has natural hair and her mom puts it

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Speaker 2: like cute little braids and burrets and stuff. She's like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I want I want hair like Auntie Edo's. So her

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Speaker 2: mom would twist it and she would call it. Look,

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Speaker 2: I got Auntie Edo hair because adot, she is my

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Speaker 2: African name and they call me Auntie know and so.

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Speaker 2: But then like a month or so ago, she said, Mommy,

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Speaker 2: I want straight hair and she's like, oh, you want

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Speaker 2: your hair like Auntie Etto. She's like no, So I

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Speaker 2: was like, who No, She said she wants her hair

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Speaker 2: because she asked her mom, how come my hair doesn't

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Speaker 2: fall down? And I remember, oh that girl.

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Speaker 3: My little brother asked me that when he was It's

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Speaker 3: a joke to this day, but it was quite sad.

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Speaker 1: I know.

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Speaker 2: I was like, hair go down, yes, And then she

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Speaker 2: was just because she goes to a school in the

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Speaker 2: north ward of New York, which is largely Hispanic, Like

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Speaker 2: it's about eighty percent Hispanic, right, So it's great because

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Speaker 2: her accent is perfect. Though Okay, her best friend, Alena

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Speaker 2: is from dr and so like they just you know,

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Speaker 2: we love that for her. But then she I realized

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Speaker 2: that meanwhile, Newark, which is so black, but here this

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Speaker 2: one school, she's kind of othered, you know, obviously not

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Speaker 2: the kids are not telling her. She didn't say anybody

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Speaker 2: made fun of her. She's just looking around and saying, hey,

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Speaker 2: I look different. And she never had a problem before

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Speaker 2: because you know, it was like the people I'm around,

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Speaker 2: they look like me. And so my sister, you know,

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Speaker 2: she was begging and begging, banging. So she brought one

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Speaker 2: of these like straightener things, but she hasn't used it.

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Speaker 3: Ye.

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Speaker 2: And the other day she actually, my sister like wears

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Speaker 2: her hair and these like really cute twists, and so

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Speaker 2: she did that for her, and she was so nervous

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Speaker 2: as go to school because she thought that the kids

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Speaker 2: would make fun of her. But she came back so

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Speaker 2: bringing them twists. Honey, everybody loved it, and we were like,

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Speaker 2: woof everybody loved it. Alena told her, oh my god,

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Speaker 2: you look just like your mom. And so I said,

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Speaker 2: Alena understood the asignment. We're like yas girl, I know,

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Speaker 2: and so we're hoping that you know, I get it

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Speaker 2: because I had straight hair for a little while and

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Speaker 2: then I came back to my natural state. And it's

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Speaker 2: part of, like I wish it wasn't part of kind

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Speaker 2: of like this navigating toward accepting yourself and but it's

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Speaker 2: just it was just hard to hear, like how come

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Speaker 2: my hair doesn't go down? Because I remember, because my

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Speaker 2: hair grows out like yours. Man, it just grows out.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't you know, doesn't fall. And I mean now

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Speaker 2: as with locks, you know, but yeah, it just made

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Speaker 2: us say, like, h how much money is made out

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Speaker 2: of the self consciousness. Meanwhile, she's six.

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Speaker 3: Well, I think it's about there's a curiosity that kids have,

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Speaker 3: and I think our our and there's so much pressure

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Speaker 3: on parents to like say the exact right thing and

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Speaker 3: then the next thing, you know, you see on IG

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Speaker 3: some parenting experts like if you say this, you're a

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Speaker 3: fucking awful parent. I'm like, well, I'm just sending yesterday

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00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:29,120
Speaker 3: and got them to bed on time. But there's a

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Speaker 3: curiosity that they are going to have about their hair,

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Speaker 3: their skin, their bodies. And I think if we approach

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Speaker 3: it as you know, your hair is naturally this way,

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Speaker 3: but look at all the amazing things it can do

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Speaker 3: because it can be straight, it can do all these

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Speaker 3: and our hair is so versatile, and if there's an

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Speaker 3: appreciation of it as one of the many things that

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Speaker 3: the hair can do, dang, And I don't have a

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Speaker 3: little I'm not raising girls, I'm raising boys. Rio already says, Mama,

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Speaker 3: my hair pop, my curls popping. And when I blow

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Speaker 3: my hair out, he doesn't like. He's like, Mama, while

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Speaker 3: your hair, well, your curls not pop. I love that

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Speaker 3: he doesn't know what it means. It's just so sincere.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, so I think that's you know, I think

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Speaker 3: it's totally natural. But I think it's like, it's how

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Speaker 3: we say that. And I had the perfect book for

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Speaker 3: mem Why where did that come from?

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Speaker 2: Do you guys call her MEMI we do because I

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Speaker 2: call my f.

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Speaker 3: I don't know why. Maybe you said it before. I

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Speaker 3: don't know her that well. But but I've read. I

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Speaker 3: actually raised a hand to read a book at I

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Speaker 3: sent you a picture right in my little yees pre

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Speaker 3: school moment. I went to the library. I got some

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Speaker 3: books to read for Rio's pre K class for a

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Speaker 3: Black History month, and one of them that I didn't

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Speaker 3: read because I checked out four books and his teacher

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Speaker 3: was like, girl, you better pick one, because one thing

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Speaker 3: these kids are not going to do to four books.

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Speaker 3: One of them was called Princess Hair. There's a beautiful

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00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:51,680
Speaker 3: book and it's like girls with kinks love to think

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Speaker 3: and girls. Maybe I shouldn't have started with that example

339
00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:57,960
Speaker 3: because it sounds weird. Girls with curls like tutwirl, and

340
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:01,320
Speaker 3: it's like all the different natural hairstyles and like a

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Speaker 3: celebration of all those different ways our hair can look.

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Speaker 3: And there's like, if you the way that I went

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Speaker 3: to the library and I sat down in the librarian

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Speaker 3: she was a white woman, but I sat down tot

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Speaker 3: her what I was looking for, and I just sat

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Speaker 3: there at my little table in the kiddie section reading books,

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Speaker 3: and she just kept bringing me over like a like

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Speaker 3: a waitress, like here's more, here's more. There's so many

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Speaker 3: great books with like so much representation of skin colors

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Speaker 3: and hair textures. And you know, I think if we

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Speaker 3: are like really intentional about it, this generation, these kids

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Speaker 3: generation is going to grow up so much more loving themselves.

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Speaker 3: I hope.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, Yeah, I think so. I mean, like I said,

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Speaker 2: she she's got her like these faux locks twist things

356
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Speaker 2: that's super cute that her mom does for herself, and

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Speaker 2: she's never not like swinging them. I'm like, okay, so,

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Speaker 2: and to your point, if if she wants to get

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Speaker 2: it straightened, she could certainly, we could certainly do that temporarily,

360
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Speaker 2: just like this is just another style, not better, not worse,

361
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Speaker 2: just another way that your hair can be.

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Speaker 3: Just let her learn about humidity after that, and poof,

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Speaker 3: I'm saying, can you can tell the weather but my

364
00:17:05,880 --> 00:17:08,800
Speaker 3: hair right, it's gonna be humid, y'all curls are out.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, it just goes to show like it's so

366
00:17:12,760 --> 00:17:15,800
Speaker 2: social media. Sometimes you just need a break because we're

367
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:19,520
Speaker 2: all susceptible to I can't tell you how much stuff

368
00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:21,639
Speaker 2: I have bought. Oh my gosh, I would say I

369
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,760
Speaker 2: should just do like I should do, like a spreadsheet

370
00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:26,720
Speaker 2: of like things I was influenced to buy. I suspect

371
00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:28,880
Speaker 2: it's at least a thousand dollars worth of stuff last year.

372
00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:32,760
Speaker 3: It's a new mall, I mean, like window shopping is

373
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:35,960
Speaker 3: scrolling on ig yeah, and it's and it knows me.

374
00:17:36,200 --> 00:17:38,720
Speaker 3: I'm just like, yeah, I would like those shoes you

375
00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:42,720
Speaker 3: are correct, and yes, last year I did take advantage

376
00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:45,240
Speaker 3: of this buy one, get one sale. So thanks for

377
00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:46,240
Speaker 3: bringing me the link back.

378
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:48,880
Speaker 2: And you know what, I really love though. I mean,

379
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:50,760
Speaker 2: this is so terrible because there might be a store

380
00:17:50,840 --> 00:17:52,800
Speaker 2: that I know. I'm not ready to buy anything now,

381
00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:54,359
Speaker 2: but I'm like, oh, I like it, so I will

382
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:57,000
Speaker 2: click on it, just so they know, continue to influence me. Now.

383
00:17:57,320 --> 00:17:59,240
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, now we know how to work the AI,

384
00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:01,639
Speaker 3: you know, like we're you're on the algo Like I

385
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:03,280
Speaker 3: once did that for husby. I got his I got

386
00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:05,280
Speaker 3: a hold of his phone and I looked for a

387
00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:08,680
Speaker 3: lot of relationship content like how to be a better husband.

388
00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:11,159
Speaker 3: And I was liking and saving and liking and saving

389
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:13,720
Speaker 3: and he's like, did you touch my phone? Something is

390
00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:17,119
Speaker 3: wrong with He knew immediately. I'm like, this is not.

391
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:20,840
Speaker 3: Oh my goodness. Yeah, it's hard for the wallet. It

392
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:24,320
Speaker 3: really really is. So y'all are on watch for like

393
00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:27,000
Speaker 3: spring break and traveling because now it's a season. Everyone's

394
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:31,760
Speaker 3: like booking up. Protect your coins at all costs. Remember

395
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:35,159
Speaker 3: what you value. Remember I'm a giant hypocrite because I

396
00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:38,399
Speaker 3: am going to Dominican Republic for a wedding and I

397
00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:40,960
Speaker 3: did spend too much on a dress for the wedding because.

398
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:43,760
Speaker 2: I did you get the one from Afree or whatever?

399
00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:46,960
Speaker 2: You got something different or they? Yeah.

400
00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:50,480
Speaker 3: So it's been really challenging to find a formal dress

401
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:54,080
Speaker 3: for the beach, especially in my size because I'm not

402
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,400
Speaker 3: like I need you know, and what I love about

403
00:18:56,440 --> 00:18:57,720
Speaker 3: the what was the place you Offree?

404
00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:59,879
Speaker 2: What's it called for? Something like Offrey Afree?

405
00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:02,400
Speaker 3: Yeah? And where they're Kenyan or where they.

406
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's an African brand, but I don't know African brands.

407
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:09,920
Speaker 3: Beautiful, Yeah, beautiful clothes, but with my timeline, like I, yeah,

408
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:11,840
Speaker 3: I didn't find anything in my size that I like there.

409
00:19:11,840 --> 00:19:15,280
Speaker 3: But we'll see. But the point is Internet is just

410
00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:18,360
Speaker 3: taking our dollars at all times.

411
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,760
Speaker 2: They say TikTok liter is like every third or fourth

412
00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:25,640
Speaker 2: like video or whatever is an ad. It's not more not.

413
00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:28,359
Speaker 3: What even Target is doing a storefront for influencers. You

414
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:31,000
Speaker 3: know how on TikTok it's like Linkster in my Amazon

415
00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:34,480
Speaker 3: storefront and everyone's you know, getting those affiliate dollars and

416
00:19:34,480 --> 00:19:37,480
Speaker 3: now Targe's rolling it out too. You know. One thing

417
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:39,800
Speaker 3: tie it back to Super Bowl ads is there was

418
00:19:39,840 --> 00:19:44,000
Speaker 3: a notable absence from these years. This year's ads was

419
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:49,360
Speaker 3: NFT and Crypto content, which was like, yeah, Crypto, Wait,

420
00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:50,960
Speaker 3: they don't have it in the Crypto stadium. No, it

421
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,520
Speaker 3: was in Vegas, but anyway, Crypto and NFT ads were

422
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:56,159
Speaker 3: all over the place the past couple of Super Bowls.

423
00:19:56,160 --> 00:20:00,840
Speaker 3: But no, it was crickets from the Crypto bros. On

424
00:20:00,920 --> 00:20:02,480
Speaker 3: the marketing team.

425
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:04,560
Speaker 2: They're like, maybe we're gonna read the room.

426
00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:10,239
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe people know too much. Now what else? Is

427
00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:12,439
Speaker 3: there anything else buzzin'?

428
00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:16,879
Speaker 2: Well, you know, I think you and I were chatting,

429
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:21,119
Speaker 2: like last week, how so many businesses? It's like this

430
00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:24,840
Speaker 2: thing that's like not being said, like explicitly so many businesses,

431
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:28,439
Speaker 2: but not just businesses, people twenty twenty three was a

432
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:31,679
Speaker 2: really hard financial year. Why is people not talking about it? Like,

433
00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:34,560
Speaker 2: I mean, certainly I've seen some people, But there was

434
00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:36,760
Speaker 2: an article that I read It was like about how

435
00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:39,080
Speaker 2: many small businesses actually went out of business in twenty

436
00:20:39,119 --> 00:20:41,080
Speaker 2: twenty three. But I can see it myself, like I'm

437
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:43,639
Speaker 2: people who I follow who've been in business for years

438
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:46,239
Speaker 2: went out of business twenty twenty three or have just

439
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:49,480
Speaker 2: been expressing how it was like a total shit show.

440
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,560
Speaker 2: But also I have friends who were looking for jobs

441
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:55,760
Speaker 2: eight months a year. I'm like, what you and I

442
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:57,919
Speaker 2: were kind of chatting and maybe we could just chat so,

443
00:20:58,119 --> 00:21:01,679
Speaker 2: you know, like I there doesn't seem usually when a

444
00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:03,919
Speaker 2: trend like this happens, you know you're seeing it on

445
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:06,679
Speaker 2: CNN and CNBC and d D, but I feel like

446
00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 2: there's not this consensus, Like there was this really bad

447
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,440
Speaker 2: financial trend where people were having a really hard time

448
00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:15,240
Speaker 2: in the business sector but also in the corporate sector,

449
00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:18,159
Speaker 2: and here's what we saw happen. I feel like it

450
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:20,679
Speaker 2: was kind of mom's the word. It's all. This is

451
00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:23,600
Speaker 2: just kind of like me just observing. Like at first

452
00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:25,240
Speaker 2: you just think like, wow, I'm having a bad year.

453
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:27,080
Speaker 2: Then I talked to one friend and another and another

454
00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:28,960
Speaker 2: and a sister and a brother, and I'm like wait,

455
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 2: And then I saw like one article on it and

456
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:34,080
Speaker 2: I thought, what was that? What was twenty twenty three

457
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:36,480
Speaker 2: and why were we all having such a hard time financially?

458
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:39,600
Speaker 3: Well, it's important, I think, just the question to reflect

459
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:42,480
Speaker 3: on last year because you as a business owner learning

460
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,160
Speaker 3: from trends, and it may not be that you made

461
00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:48,200
Speaker 3: a mistake, but like what you were your services, your products,

462
00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:50,720
Speaker 3: like the consumer sentiment was different, like they weren't ready

463
00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:53,160
Speaker 3: to spend on that type of service. And I think

464
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:56,119
Speaker 3: the risk is, like you, if you pivot too quickly

465
00:21:56,160 --> 00:22:00,399
Speaker 3: because something isn't working, then maybe what you have is

466
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:03,200
Speaker 3: great for when the cycle, when this dip is over,

467
00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:05,200
Speaker 3: whenever the you know, people are not wanting to spend

468
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:08,240
Speaker 3: their dollars in this way. They're feeling more frugal. They're

469
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:10,159
Speaker 3: spending so much more money at the grocery store, and

470
00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:12,280
Speaker 3: it's like, am I going to get bread and eggs

471
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:15,159
Speaker 3: which are really expensive? Am I going to spend on this? Like,

472
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:17,919
Speaker 3: but your services are still good, maybe your funnel, you know,

473
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:21,800
Speaker 3: where the customer journey is still good. But if you scramble.

474
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:23,679
Speaker 3: I don't know if you've heard this as well, but

475
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,359
Speaker 3: like I know, for me, I made some choices in

476
00:22:26,359 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 3: twenty twenty three out of a reaction to like, oh,

477
00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:31,359
Speaker 3: that's not working anymore. I'm going to change and like

478
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:35,400
Speaker 3: try this instead and change a price here and make

479
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:37,440
Speaker 3: this free where I as I used to charge for it.

480
00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:41,679
Speaker 3: And I don't know that I necessarily had to, but

481
00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:44,479
Speaker 3: it felt like something that I could, you know, I

482
00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:46,760
Speaker 3: was like, well, just pull this lever here and see

483
00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:50,239
Speaker 3: what happens. But I didn't. Luckily, because I was on

484
00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:53,840
Speaker 3: maternity leave and in pregnant delirium for a lot of

485
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:57,040
Speaker 3: the year and then postpartum delirium, I didn't fiddle too

486
00:22:57,119 --> 00:23:00,679
Speaker 3: much with my business and that might have actually helped me,

487
00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:05,000
Speaker 3: because I almost feel like sometimes and you know, you've

488
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:07,800
Speaker 3: been in this longer than me, and you have clearly

489
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:09,760
Speaker 3: talked to a lot of people about it, But I

490
00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 3: feel like in business sometimes it's almost like treated like

491
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:14,639
Speaker 3: an index fund, a little bit like once you have

492
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:17,800
Speaker 3: the infrastructure set up, sort of like ride the ups

493
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:20,600
Speaker 3: and downs, but stay true to what's worked for you,

494
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:24,119
Speaker 3: or double down maybe on some core offers rather than

495
00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:27,600
Speaker 3: like adding new stuff. And I was I was texting

496
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:30,960
Speaker 3: with Mark Russell. Do you know Mark from Better Wallet?

497
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:32,119
Speaker 3: He was on the show, but I think it was

498
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:32,840
Speaker 3: when you were gone.

499
00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:34,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I know I don't know him personally, but

500
00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:36,119
Speaker 2: like I follow him.

501
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:39,240
Speaker 3: He loves you. You're like his idol. But anyway, but

502
00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:40,760
Speaker 3: Mark and I were texting and I was like, yeah, so,

503
00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:42,159
Speaker 3: how was twenty twenty three for you. I've heard that

504
00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:44,480
Speaker 3: it's been rough, and he said, actually, I've had I

505
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:48,119
Speaker 3: had a great twenty twenty three, I got rid of

506
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:50,280
Speaker 3: a lot of extra stuff that I had been adding

507
00:23:50,359 --> 00:23:54,040
Speaker 3: and just focused on my core offer, and he had

508
00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 3: a really strong year. So Okay, I don't know, that's

509
00:23:57,359 --> 00:23:59,040
Speaker 3: just what I Yeah, and.

510
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:01,879
Speaker 2: I say this too, like one of the things one

511
00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:06,400
Speaker 2: of the most difficult parts of business is knowing when,

512
00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:12,240
Speaker 2: because so, for example, we think of Blockbuster and what

513
00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:15,359
Speaker 2: their core offer was, when is a time, you know,

514
00:24:15,680 --> 00:24:17,639
Speaker 2: because it's like, you know, you don't want to pivot

515
00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:20,280
Speaker 2: too late, because there is no business that's doing the

516
00:24:20,320 --> 00:24:23,760
Speaker 2: exact same thing it was doing twenty thirty, forty years ago.

517
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:26,120
Speaker 2: It's like, you know, so I would say, like, for example,

518
00:24:26,119 --> 00:24:28,600
Speaker 2: maybe the core offer for Blockbusters, we deliver movies, and

519
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:31,680
Speaker 2: they needed to pivot to delivering movies in a different way,

520
00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:34,000
Speaker 2: you know, And then they waited too long and Netflix

521
00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:36,320
Speaker 2: was like Man Man, Man and the Booboo. You know, gotcha,

522
00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:39,439
Speaker 2: you know, And so yeah, that's the part. It was

523
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:42,320
Speaker 2: like I was just talking to someone on my team

524
00:24:42,359 --> 00:24:45,119
Speaker 2: earlier today, like I don't want to do bad good,

525
00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:48,960
Speaker 2: meaning like there are some offers that we have that

526
00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:51,960
Speaker 2: I feel like it's they're expired now we've been doing

527
00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 2: it for like eight years. So it's a it's a

528
00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:56,240
Speaker 2: it's a it's a it's a it's not a bad

529
00:24:56,280 --> 00:24:59,600
Speaker 2: product inherently, but it's just not. The audience is just

530
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:01,199
Speaker 2: not this is not where they're wanting, this is not

531
00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:03,760
Speaker 2: what they're wanting. So it's quote unquote bad, but it's

532
00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:06,560
Speaker 2: like we're really good at doing it. And I'm just like, yeah,

533
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:09,640
Speaker 2: but to what you know? And so that's the thing

534
00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:13,760
Speaker 2: that's the struggle machine yes, and so you know, because

535
00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:15,760
Speaker 2: you like, you don't want to get stuck in that like,

536
00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:19,760
Speaker 2: uh so there that is the struggle of like, you

537
00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:22,000
Speaker 2: don't want to just be pisoting because I've seen businesses

538
00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:24,480
Speaker 2: like that. I have come up with people that when

539
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:27,000
Speaker 2: I first started the Budgetista, they had one thing that

540
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,159
Speaker 2: they were doing and then two years in they did

541
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,200
Speaker 2: something else. In two years in and I'm still doing

542
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:33,800
Speaker 2: the budgetiessta Financial education, and they're like, I should have

543
00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:36,280
Speaker 2: stuck with the thing. So to your point, that's.

544
00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:38,920
Speaker 3: What I was kind of trying to get at. Yeah, exactly. No,

545
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:42,840
Speaker 3: not that you don't want to try and evolve, but

546
00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:45,959
Speaker 3: that you sort of trust that it takes time, yes,

547
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:47,840
Speaker 3: to be sticky and to.

548
00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:50,119
Speaker 2: Yes, And maybe what it is is that this is

549
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:52,959
Speaker 2: your core thing, and you just get different with how

550
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:56,439
Speaker 2: you deliver it. So if I'm a financial educator, it's like, oh,

551
00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,800
Speaker 2: there's books, Oh, but there's also courses. Oh but there's

552
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:01,840
Speaker 2: also spokesperson word. Oh, it also speaking it. So I

553
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,840
Speaker 2: have pivoted in how I delivered the core thing, which

554
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:09,560
Speaker 2: is financial education. Yeah, so it's just something else. And

555
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:11,639
Speaker 2: the truth is that's just the nature of business, Like

556
00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:14,560
Speaker 2: there's no such thing as we did it Joe like,

557
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:17,640
Speaker 2: and you just stay there, like even if you had

558
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:19,680
Speaker 2: an amazing year, well, the next year is a new year,

559
00:26:19,760 --> 00:26:22,359
Speaker 2: and it's like, girl, we have different requirements. You have

560
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:25,280
Speaker 2: to pivot and change and grow and and edit and

561
00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:27,840
Speaker 2: add and and so that's the thing. Like sometimes I

562
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:30,200
Speaker 2: see people in business and they're like, oh, I must

563
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:31,800
Speaker 2: not be good at this. I'm like, no, this is

564
00:26:31,920 --> 00:26:34,920
Speaker 2: actually what it looks like. Like think about like raising kids. Right,

565
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:38,400
Speaker 2: it's not like who we did It wasn't last year great,

566
00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:41,359
Speaker 2: It's like, uh, rio's like still growing. Yeah, so there's

567
00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:43,399
Speaker 2: more this year. You had a good deal with me

568
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:47,040
Speaker 2: last year. This year is the year that I decide

569
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:49,439
Speaker 2: I no longer like vegetables. It's like, wait, what you

570
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:53,160
Speaker 2: still love vegetables. I change my mind. Why do kids

571
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:55,440
Speaker 2: do that? Right? You're like, but you looked corn. They're like,

572
00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:57,359
Speaker 2: that was yesterday. Matter of fact, that was this morning.

573
00:26:57,400 --> 00:26:57,840
Speaker 2: You're late.

574
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:00,920
Speaker 3: I don't know what screw who got put in the

575
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:04,320
Speaker 3: wrong place in Rio's whole brain. But he loves broccoli.

576
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 3: There's times where I'm begging him eat the hot dog. No, no,

577
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:10,400
Speaker 3: get the protea. He's like, I just want the broccoli.

578
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:14,639
Speaker 3: I can't tell you. I'll take credit for it. But

579
00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:16,959
Speaker 3: I'm like, and I'm listening to myself, like, shout up

580
00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 3: to letting me have the broccoli. Let him get the

581
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:23,120
Speaker 3: nutrients now. But yeah, So if you're yeah, whether you're

582
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:25,880
Speaker 3: in business, Oh, you asked about like the nine to five,

583
00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:30,359
Speaker 3: you know, the job search. Actually, my sister if she

584
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:33,719
Speaker 3: don't want me putting her business out, she won't. She

585
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:36,040
Speaker 3: works in healthcare. I think I've talked about it before,

586
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:39,600
Speaker 3: and she works in healthcare for a huge healthcare system

587
00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:44,080
Speaker 3: in the Midwest. And she has really been struggling because

588
00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:46,440
Speaker 3: she'll get to like the final round of interviews again

589
00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:48,719
Speaker 3: and again and again and then lose out and not

590
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:51,960
Speaker 3: get picked. And I was ready to like, I was like,

591
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,199
Speaker 3: give me your manager's phone number, because I want to

592
00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:56,480
Speaker 3: call them. I need to call them up and be like,

593
00:27:56,520 --> 00:27:58,400
Speaker 3: why are you wasting this talent? Why aren't you guys

594
00:27:58,440 --> 00:28:01,240
Speaker 3: like recognizing this what's going on? Because she has everything

595
00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:04,240
Speaker 3: you'd want right And finally she got some feedback that

596
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:06,840
Speaker 3: I thought was really enlightening. And also, if you have

597
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:09,120
Speaker 3: if you're struggling in the job market, it's one thing

598
00:28:09,119 --> 00:28:11,640
Speaker 3: for my sister because she, you know, its jobs within

599
00:28:11,680 --> 00:28:14,359
Speaker 3: her medical system, so she has access to ask people

600
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:16,919
Speaker 3: for feedback in a way that some people don't. If

601
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:19,439
Speaker 3: you've ever really just talked to a recruiter and you're

602
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:22,439
Speaker 3: not a part of the company, but nonetheless asking for

603
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,879
Speaker 3: that feedback and if they're generous enough to provide you

604
00:28:24,920 --> 00:28:27,000
Speaker 3: some can be insightful and can put you at ease.

605
00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:29,679
Speaker 3: And for my sister, the feedback was, you know, we

606
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:34,240
Speaker 3: had fifty plus candidates, good candidates qualified on paper, candidates

607
00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:37,479
Speaker 3: for this role, and you made the top three and

608
00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:40,520
Speaker 3: ultimately went with someone who had been doing this role,

609
00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:42,479
Speaker 3: which kind of pisses me off because like, how are

610
00:28:42,520 --> 00:28:45,120
Speaker 3: people going to get a chance anyway, went with a

611
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:47,880
Speaker 3: safer option of someone who had, you know, the exact

612
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:51,640
Speaker 3: experience somewhere else, and I do think the difference is few.

613
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:56,320
Speaker 3: You know, the job market is like stronger in some ways,

614
00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:58,520
Speaker 3: but it's more of a balance toward the employer, and

615
00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:00,720
Speaker 3: especially in these hot and it was a remote job.

616
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,640
Speaker 3: It had these bells and whistles, and I'm like, everyone's

617
00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:08,320
Speaker 3: looking for these juicy opportunities and I think there's just

618
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 3: more folks out there who are qualified. And in my

619
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:14,160
Speaker 3: sister's case, I was like, Mallory, you got to stop

620
00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:16,440
Speaker 3: banging your head against the wall thinking you know I'm

621
00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:18,840
Speaker 3: not good enough. I'm like, you need an advocate who

622
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:21,120
Speaker 3: knows you're good enough and can get you over this

623
00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:24,400
Speaker 3: experience hurdle, because that is what's holding back. No I

624
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:27,440
Speaker 3: want she's not holding herself back, but you're if you're

625
00:29:27,440 --> 00:29:29,600
Speaker 3: her manager right now, if you're in a hiring position,

626
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:32,160
Speaker 3: I need you all to listen up. There are people

627
00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:34,600
Speaker 3: like my sister who have the talent and no shade

628
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:36,640
Speaker 3: to the person who got the job, like kudos to them,

629
00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:39,880
Speaker 3: but how many people are you missing out on who

630
00:29:39,880 --> 00:29:43,240
Speaker 3: would be so loyal Not that loyalty should be celebrated entirely,

631
00:29:43,280 --> 00:29:45,760
Speaker 3: but when you hire someone, you give them a shot.

632
00:29:45,800 --> 00:29:49,280
Speaker 3: When you say I see your potential, you create such

633
00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 3: a great like vibe, such a great mentality from that

634
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:55,440
Speaker 3: one employee to join your team, Like they're going to

635
00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:58,000
Speaker 3: be all in, They're going to be so grateful because

636
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:00,000
Speaker 3: you took a chance on them. They get to prove themselves.

637
00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:02,880
Speaker 3: They're going to be stickier, you know. Turnover is something

638
00:30:02,880 --> 00:30:04,680
Speaker 3: you think about as a hiring manager, and for me,

639
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:07,680
Speaker 3: I would look for people who weren't perfectly on paper

640
00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 3: the person that I was looking for, but who could

641
00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:13,160
Speaker 3: get there, who had enough experience and I could tell

642
00:30:13,600 --> 00:30:16,680
Speaker 3: just needed like a chance, like needed an opportunity, needed

643
00:30:16,680 --> 00:30:19,760
Speaker 3: someone to say, oh you can do this, you know.

644
00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 3: And if we don't have enough leaders thinking that way,

645
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:25,320
Speaker 3: then you end up, I feel like, with people who

646
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:28,440
Speaker 3: are going to be job hopping and going from one

647
00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:31,640
Speaker 3: offer to the next, which is not bad, but for

648
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:33,720
Speaker 3: an employer, you want people who were going to stick

649
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:37,480
Speaker 3: around and grow, you know. And that made me very

650
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:42,560
Speaker 3: frustrated for her, but also wanting her to be more.

651
00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:45,200
Speaker 3: I mean, she already is. She's doing an amazing job

652
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:49,320
Speaker 3: like making sure that her manager's managers, managers know that

653
00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:52,440
Speaker 3: she's looking and that she's interested in a new opportunity,

654
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:55,480
Speaker 3: and that she's been really frustrated by what's been happening

655
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:58,360
Speaker 3: with these other opportunities kind of slipping through her grasp

656
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:00,480
Speaker 3: and until one of them, which I think she's finally

657
00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:03,920
Speaker 3: getting through their fixed skulls, starts to look at where

658
00:31:03,920 --> 00:31:06,800
Speaker 3: can we put her or how can we move her

659
00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:08,480
Speaker 3: to the top, you know, like that's what it's going

660
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:12,040
Speaker 3: to take in a lot of cases, So those relationship

661
00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:15,800
Speaker 3: building becomes a lot more important than necessarily the resume.

662
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:18,080
Speaker 2: That's what I'm hearing more because I think it was

663
00:31:18,080 --> 00:31:21,320
Speaker 2: a CNBC article. They said that, like they ask a

664
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:23,760
Speaker 2: bunch of hiring managers what's happening. They're like, well, last

665
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:26,880
Speaker 2: year or the year before twenty twenty two, when we

666
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:29,640
Speaker 2: would put out a job, there might be say forty

667
00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:31,880
Speaker 2: people that apply, and it was like a video and

668
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:34,560
Speaker 2: the guy's like, now, within half an hour, four hundred

669
00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:38,600
Speaker 2: people have applied. So to your point, there is a

670
00:31:38,920 --> 00:31:41,240
Speaker 2: there's I mean, you're at least ten of them are

671
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:44,040
Speaker 2: going to be excellent. And he said, what they're what

672
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:45,920
Speaker 2: they're seeing is the people who are getting the job

673
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:48,959
Speaker 2: have an internal advocate. To your point, like I think

674
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 2: about my friend as most recently am my friends most

675
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:55,200
Speaker 2: recently who have gotten jobs, someone internally has come in.

676
00:31:55,360 --> 00:31:57,520
Speaker 2: Because I'm looking around, I'm like, okay, there's four hundred

677
00:31:57,520 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 2: people obviously now, but ten of these people are great.

678
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 2: But if one of them has a friend who's excellent,

679
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:04,520
Speaker 2: who works here, who says you really should consider such

680
00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:07,440
Speaker 2: and such, that makes me makes it easier because they're like, well,

681
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:09,720
Speaker 2: you're good, and you're suggesting them because now you're putting

682
00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:12,440
Speaker 2: your job on the line, you know, So now you

683
00:32:12,520 --> 00:32:15,280
Speaker 2: have this internal advocate. So all of my friends recently

684
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 2: they've gotten new jobs, there has been an internal advocate

685
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:21,760
Speaker 2: or some sort of external advocate that knows somebody internally

686
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:23,880
Speaker 2: that allows them to get over the last hump. So

687
00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:27,080
Speaker 2: you know, that's the thing. It really is like you

688
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:29,400
Speaker 2: got to know somebody and so you really should be

689
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:31,080
Speaker 2: I know, Mandy, you've said this so many times before

690
00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:33,200
Speaker 2: here on the show, but also to your Mandy moneymakers.

691
00:32:33,720 --> 00:32:36,720
Speaker 2: Is that like let people know you're looking. Let's your friends,

692
00:32:36,760 --> 00:32:39,000
Speaker 2: your friend's friends, your friends, like, let them make the

693
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:40,960
Speaker 2: phone call and reach out and you should get such

694
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,160
Speaker 2: and such. He's amazing. So yeah, I know that the

695
00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:44,400
Speaker 2: advice that you give a lot.

696
00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:46,320
Speaker 3: To brag on yourself, and I'll give it again till

697
00:32:46,320 --> 00:32:49,360
Speaker 3: I'm blue in the face, because it's still hard. And

698
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:51,360
Speaker 3: it's one thing because we're so good at advocating for

699
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:53,400
Speaker 3: others women I'm talking about women of color in general,

700
00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:55,800
Speaker 3: Like we love to cheer each other on, but when

701
00:32:55,840 --> 00:32:57,760
Speaker 3: it comes time for us to need something, it is

702
00:32:57,800 --> 00:33:00,120
Speaker 3: really hard. I see it every day, you know you,

703
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:03,240
Speaker 3: Mandy money Makers recently were let go and I hopped

704
00:33:03,240 --> 00:33:04,720
Speaker 3: on a call with them to kind of talk them

705
00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:07,120
Speaker 3: through the severiance agreement and stuff, and one of them

706
00:33:07,200 --> 00:33:09,440
Speaker 3: was like, you know, should I post it on LinkedIn?

707
00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:12,520
Speaker 3: Like should I let people know? She was feeling the

708
00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:15,040
Speaker 3: shame of it, you know, because she had been through

709
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:17,480
Speaker 3: my coaching really active on LinkedIn and sharing her wins.

710
00:33:17,520 --> 00:33:19,400
Speaker 3: And I was like, oh, hell, yes, you need to,

711
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:21,560
Speaker 3: but you own the story when you post about it.

712
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,600
Speaker 3: You own the story in terms of I've been let go,

713
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:27,080
Speaker 3: but here's what I've accomplished in the last you know,

714
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:28,760
Speaker 3: one and a half years that I've been here, and

715
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:30,720
Speaker 3: now I'm looking I can't wait to bring this value

716
00:33:30,760 --> 00:33:32,800
Speaker 3: to another team. And when I tell you, she already

717
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:36,320
Speaker 3: has an interview with one of her top companies. Yes

718
00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:42,200
Speaker 3: I was. I was like, yeah, yes because someone Yes,

719
00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:46,200
Speaker 3: because someone saw her post who knew the head of HR.

720
00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:48,840
Speaker 3: She didn't know the head of HR, but someone she

721
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:52,200
Speaker 3: knew was connected to them, and so when they posted

722
00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:55,360
Speaker 3: on her comments and on her post that HR person,

723
00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:58,560
Speaker 3: it showed up in their feed. And I'm like, this

724
00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:02,320
Speaker 3: is why we be out there on the LinkedIn streets, okay,

725
00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:05,960
Speaker 3: sharing and as an uncomfortable as it is, Yeah, vulnerability

726
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:08,120
Speaker 3: can can pay off in that way.

727
00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:10,239
Speaker 2: I love that. Should we take a break so we

728
00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:12,000
Speaker 2: can do brown boots brown break? We haven't done when

729
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:12,760
Speaker 2: in so long?

730
00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:14,480
Speaker 3: Oh, I gotta think of something.

731
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:15,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's do it.

732
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:18,640
Speaker 1: All right, we be right back in black for more.

733
00:34:23,360 --> 00:34:29,080
Speaker 1: We're back and now it's time to boost up. Break up,

734
00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:33,000
Speaker 1: boost up, break up, boost up? Break Are you gonna boost?

735
00:34:34,360 --> 00:34:35,200
Speaker 1: Are you gonna break?

736
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:42,600
Speaker 2: What you're gonna do? What you're going to see? I'm

737
00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:46,960
Speaker 2: going to boost. I'm trying to think I'm gonna make

738
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:53,080
Speaker 2: this okay. So I have this opportunity where I get

739
00:34:53,080 --> 00:34:55,600
Speaker 2: to contract out if you live in the Tri state area,

740
00:34:55,680 --> 00:34:59,680
Speaker 2: especially New Jersey, I'm gonna be doing this like two

741
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 2: year your summer program, all things personal finance for elementary,

742
00:35:04,280 --> 00:35:06,960
Speaker 2: middle school, and high school, right, and so I get

743
00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:10,480
Speaker 2: to hire other financial education I love that, you know,

744
00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:14,120
Speaker 2: and so I'm just like, you know, so I'm actually

745
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:15,880
Speaker 2: gonna put it out there, you know, go ahead on

746
00:35:15,960 --> 00:35:18,560
Speaker 2: and contact me. You can sign to my DMS or

747
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:22,080
Speaker 2: just email me Tiffany at the Bunchanista that I'm so

748
00:35:22,160 --> 00:35:25,600
Speaker 2: glad that I'm in a space now where I get

749
00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:29,960
Speaker 2: to pass on opportunities. So if you're a financial educator,

750
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:33,480
Speaker 2: if you have a curriculum, it doesn't have to be

751
00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:35,760
Speaker 2: K through twelve, but if you have an elementary school

752
00:35:35,760 --> 00:35:37,720
Speaker 2: curriculum and then a high school clipper or middle school,

753
00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:40,120
Speaker 2: either one of those three or all three all together,

754
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:44,280
Speaker 2: and especially if you are open to teaching that curriculum

755
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:46,600
Speaker 2: in person, it would be a new jersey. Let us

756
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:48,479
Speaker 2: just to know, because I'm going to be hiring because

757
00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:50,839
Speaker 2: I got this great opportunity and I get to bring

758
00:35:50,880 --> 00:35:52,520
Speaker 2: on a team, and I'm like, I don't want to

759
00:35:52,520 --> 00:35:55,719
Speaker 2: do all the work myself. I'm much rather slide some

760
00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:59,799
Speaker 2: coins on to y'all. So that's my boost, that the

761
00:36:00,000 --> 00:36:03,440
Speaker 2: opportunity to be able to put on other people, and

762
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:06,400
Speaker 2: just the gratefulness that these things come to me and

763
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:09,640
Speaker 2: then I can share them as well. So, like I said,

764
00:36:09,640 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 2: if you if that sounds like you are somebody you know,

765
00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:13,560
Speaker 2: go ahead and share. Now here's the thing. I gotta

766
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:15,160
Speaker 2: make a choice by the end of the month. So

767
00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:17,080
Speaker 2: if you're listening to this like ten years from now.

768
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:20,560
Speaker 3: By, you get an extra Yeah, you get an extra day.

769
00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:24,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, So February twenty what is it, the twenty ninth?

770
00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:27,680
Speaker 2: Is that? Okay? Yeah, so February twenty ninth, because I

771
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:31,600
Speaker 2: got to make my decision by March fifth, So I'm

772
00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:33,880
Speaker 2: gonna at the end of the twenty ninth, I'm not

773
00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:37,359
Speaker 2: making I'm not taking any on any new folks. So

774
00:36:37,360 --> 00:36:40,080
Speaker 2: so yeah, so if you're interested, email me Tiffany at

775
00:36:40,080 --> 00:36:44,839
Speaker 2: the Budgetista dot com and yeah, and just tell me yes,

776
00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:46,840
Speaker 2: I have a curriculum, or yes I have a curriculum

777
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:50,400
Speaker 2: and I want to teach or whatever, and then we'll see.

778
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:53,359
Speaker 2: We'll see I mean cool, I mean extra well, your

779
00:36:53,480 --> 00:36:57,799
Speaker 2: this is brown ambishion. Everyone is welcome. I'll just say

780
00:36:57,800 --> 00:36:58,520
Speaker 2: everybody's welcome.

781
00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:07,479
Speaker 3: We got it. I thought this show was all about

782
00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:08,960
Speaker 3: just saying the things I know.

783
00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:15,440
Speaker 2: Yes, ideally, because you can be working with children of

784
00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:20,279
Speaker 2: color yeah, that's always like an amazing opportunity to im

785
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:23,000
Speaker 2: just like I don't know, it takes a lot out

786
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 2: of each of it.

787
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:26,080
Speaker 3: I spent twenty minutes with like some four year olds

788
00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:28,319
Speaker 3: reading a book to them, and the energy I went

789
00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:31,319
Speaker 3: I was trying to I really was bringing out my

790
00:37:31,360 --> 00:37:33,520
Speaker 3: inner tab at the brown and it was a lot

791
00:37:33,520 --> 00:37:36,319
Speaker 3: of fun. But the way I needed to nap after that,

792
00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:38,120
Speaker 3: my introverted self.

793
00:37:38,560 --> 00:37:40,319
Speaker 2: He's not free school teacher. It's not for the faint

794
00:37:40,320 --> 00:37:40,560
Speaker 2: of heart.

795
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:43,760
Speaker 3: It's a lot of introverted school teacher for little kids.

796
00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:47,000
Speaker 3: How is that? And then you got to go home

797
00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:48,719
Speaker 3: and his teacher has like three kids of her own.

798
00:37:48,920 --> 00:37:53,560
Speaker 3: Imagine God bless. I went right to her Amazon wishless

799
00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:55,480
Speaker 3: and I stopped her up. I'm like, let me get

800
00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 3: you some things to distract them.

801
00:37:58,080 --> 00:38:00,200
Speaker 2: But because they got a love on their baby, baby

802
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:01,880
Speaker 2: said love on there and they just be loving on

803
00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:05,480
Speaker 2: the I mean, I love my kids. There was nothing

804
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:07,000
Speaker 2: I wouldn't give it. I'm like, oh, baby girl, I'm

805
00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:09,080
Speaker 2: gonna get you that. Do you want what? And so?

806
00:38:09,280 --> 00:38:10,879
Speaker 2: But I couldn't even make it all the way home.

807
00:38:10,880 --> 00:38:12,400
Speaker 2: There used to be a Walmart parking lot where I

808
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:14,680
Speaker 2: would it was. My house is a forty like a

809
00:38:14,719 --> 00:38:18,480
Speaker 2: forty minute drive home twenty minutes in. I'm like, I

810
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:20,319
Speaker 2: used to pull into the parking like the secret little

811
00:38:20,320 --> 00:38:23,040
Speaker 2: spots park and take a nap, a thirty minute nap

812
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:23,840
Speaker 2: to make it the rest of it.

813
00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:26,640
Speaker 3: That's yes, I mean that's just safe driving. You know,

814
00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:30,799
Speaker 3: it's very responsible. But I've never felt more. Yeah, I see,

815
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,960
Speaker 3: I see you, and I have been that person in

816
00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:35,600
Speaker 3: the parking lot of BJ's. I'm not going to tell

817
00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:37,960
Speaker 3: you all the spot, but the trick is don't go

818
00:38:37,960 --> 00:38:39,319
Speaker 3: to the back of the parking lot though, because that's

819
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:41,120
Speaker 3: where the weirdos hang out. Yes, you need to go

820
00:38:41,160 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 3: to the front. Yeah, I'm going to do. I want

821
00:38:43,960 --> 00:38:45,400
Speaker 3: to do a little boost for the book that I

822
00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:47,680
Speaker 3: did end up reading in Rio's classroom. It was such

823
00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:50,440
Speaker 3: a beautiful book. It was called a Computer called Catherine.

824
00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 3: So it's about Catherine Johnson, the mathematician who you know

825
00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:57,880
Speaker 3: the whole movie about her, Taraji p Henson played her

826
00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:01,480
Speaker 3: and Hidden Figures. And it's such a lovely book. I'm

827
00:39:01,520 --> 00:39:05,560
Speaker 3: going to figure out the author beautifully illustrated. The story

828
00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:07,680
Speaker 3: is so cute, perfect for kids. I was a little

829
00:39:07,719 --> 00:39:10,520
Speaker 3: stressed about like, how do I I want to go

830
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:11,719
Speaker 3: in there and read a story. I don't want to

831
00:39:11,760 --> 00:39:13,839
Speaker 3: tell them about black history ones like they're four years old.

832
00:39:13,880 --> 00:39:15,400
Speaker 3: You know, I'm not trying to. But I did talk

833
00:39:15,440 --> 00:39:17,879
Speaker 3: about how we all have different skin colors and how

834
00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:20,880
Speaker 3: sometimes or in the past, if you had different skin colors,

835
00:39:21,360 --> 00:39:23,319
Speaker 3: you'd be treated differently. People didn't want you to go

836
00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:25,720
Speaker 3: to school. And you know, I was like, and everyone

837
00:39:25,760 --> 00:39:27,680
Speaker 3: started holding up their little hands and like I have

838
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:29,600
Speaker 3: Peach scan, I have tan scan.

839
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:35,920
Speaker 2: It was so Cat was like me, I saw the victory.

840
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:37,640
Speaker 2: I was like, I know, he's like my mom's at school.

841
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:40,400
Speaker 3: The way he kept trying to interrupt me, I was like,

842
00:39:40,640 --> 00:39:48,440
Speaker 3: you know, like, yes, mom, I know a computer called Katherine.

843
00:39:48,560 --> 00:39:54,200
Speaker 3: It is by Susanne Slade with illustrations by Veronica Miller Jamison.

844
00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:56,120
Speaker 3: Just a beautiful book. So if you're looking for a

845
00:39:56,120 --> 00:39:57,640
Speaker 3: good and what I loved is is about a woman

846
00:39:57,680 --> 00:40:00,480
Speaker 3: of color. His class is eleven girls, five boys. The

847
00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:03,480
Speaker 3: estrogen is on another level. I don't know four year

848
00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:06,319
Speaker 3: olds have that yet, but anyway, so I just loved

849
00:40:06,360 --> 00:40:08,640
Speaker 3: It's a great example of and you know, a girl

850
00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:10,719
Speaker 3: who's into math and all that. Let me do a

851
00:40:10,719 --> 00:40:15,560
Speaker 3: boost for that. Let me do a boost for m.

852
00:40:19,440 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 3: Do I go like funny or do I go serious?

853
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,360
Speaker 3: I'll go serious, So tiff nos, because I talked to

854
00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:29,880
Speaker 3: you the other today, and I'll try to do it

855
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:33,480
Speaker 3: a lot quicker than the winding conversation I trapped Tiffany

856
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:36,160
Speaker 3: into last week. But my mindset, I've been working on

857
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:41,680
Speaker 3: a new mindset about motherhood and business owner and author.

858
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:44,480
Speaker 3: And the very simple way to describe it is like

859
00:40:45,160 --> 00:40:47,920
Speaker 3: I've spent a lot of time or I find myself

860
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:51,480
Speaker 3: kind of getting into like resent full mindsets, like where

861
00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:54,160
Speaker 3: I resent the lack of time I have, and I

862
00:40:54,760 --> 00:40:57,560
Speaker 3: you know, I feel like time is is my anxiety right.

863
00:40:57,560 --> 00:41:00,880
Speaker 3: Time is constantly chasing me down. I'm trapped between two walls.

864
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:03,239
Speaker 3: And you know, a daytime, like a day for me

865
00:41:03,360 --> 00:41:05,000
Speaker 3: is after the kids are dropped off at school and

866
00:41:05,000 --> 00:41:06,840
Speaker 3: when I have to pick them up, and it feels

867
00:41:06,840 --> 00:41:08,879
Speaker 3: like I'm in Indiana Jones and the walls are kind

868
00:41:08,920 --> 00:41:11,400
Speaker 3: of and the clock is ticking and I'm just getting

869
00:41:11,400 --> 00:41:13,200
Speaker 3: squished and there's not enough time to do all the

870
00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:14,560
Speaker 3: things I want to do and I could do so

871
00:41:14,680 --> 00:41:16,319
Speaker 3: much more if I just had more time. Blah blah,

872
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:20,080
Speaker 3: blah blah blah. Well, one thing that has really just

873
00:41:20,120 --> 00:41:22,719
Speaker 3: like clicked for me in the past week has been

874
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:29,400
Speaker 3: this space of appreciation and gratitude for the children I have,

875
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:31,360
Speaker 3: for the life I have, and for the ability that

876
00:41:31,400 --> 00:41:34,200
Speaker 3: I have to do the things like to do the

877
00:41:34,239 --> 00:41:37,239
Speaker 3: mom stuff, to do the go to Rio's school and

878
00:41:37,239 --> 00:41:40,359
Speaker 3: read to him, and you know, take Remy a new

879
00:41:40,400 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 3: outfit when he has a blowout diaper and he's run

880
00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:47,160
Speaker 3: through all of the sparclothes, and to kind of accept

881
00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:50,799
Speaker 3: and appreciate and just shift from I have to do

882
00:41:50,840 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 3: these things. There's not enough time to I am able.

883
00:41:55,400 --> 00:41:57,719
Speaker 3: I get to do these things. And I'm taking that

884
00:41:57,760 --> 00:42:02,479
Speaker 3: approach not just to the home stuff but my work life.

885
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:06,880
Speaker 3: You know, I was talking to my publisher, Krashan at Hashet.

886
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:10,120
Speaker 3: Shout out to Kashan, and I went to their offices

887
00:42:10,160 --> 00:42:12,120
Speaker 3: and it was so cool to see the office. I mean,

888
00:42:12,239 --> 00:42:15,399
Speaker 3: eight year old me was just singing. I was so

889
00:42:15,480 --> 00:42:18,520
Speaker 3: happy just to be that in that space, and I

890
00:42:18,600 --> 00:42:20,239
Speaker 3: was like, I don't feel like I have to write

891
00:42:20,239 --> 00:42:22,200
Speaker 3: this book. I feel like I get to write this book.

892
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:25,680
Speaker 3: What a privilege I get to write this book. I

893
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:30,600
Speaker 3: get to spend time creating content that can help people

894
00:42:30,680 --> 00:42:33,160
Speaker 3: because somehow I get to do this business and I

895
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:36,000
Speaker 3: get to do a podcast with you that helps pay

896
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:38,319
Speaker 3: the mortgage, you know, like I get to do these

897
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:40,400
Speaker 3: things and it sounds real simple, But I feel like

898
00:42:40,480 --> 00:42:43,600
Speaker 3: I lost that gratitude mindset and I found it again,

899
00:42:44,040 --> 00:42:47,960
Speaker 3: and I have been totally. My husband's like, what's different.

900
00:42:48,640 --> 00:42:51,680
Speaker 3: I'm like, I worked on myself. I stopped expecting other

901
00:42:51,719 --> 00:42:54,040
Speaker 3: people to fix, you know, my struggles, and just like

902
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:58,120
Speaker 3: change my mindset and it's really really working. So if

903
00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:00,200
Speaker 3: that sounds like you, and it sounds like something you're

904
00:43:00,239 --> 00:43:05,319
Speaker 3: struggling with and it's frustrating to hear, but sometimes it

905
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:06,880
Speaker 3: has to start with you and the way that you

906
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:10,440
Speaker 3: were thinking about things and how much that's causing the

907
00:43:10,480 --> 00:43:13,560
Speaker 3: stress and the anxiety. And I can't wait to tell

908
00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:15,760
Speaker 3: my therapist about it. She'll probably be so proud.

909
00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:20,480
Speaker 2: You know, we talked about that perspective is so because

910
00:43:20,560 --> 00:43:22,719
Speaker 2: I remember I told you that when Maid Whole came out,

911
00:43:22,719 --> 00:43:26,800
Speaker 2: I was so stressed and was so overwhelmed, and so

912
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:28,840
Speaker 2: I didn't want to do it. I'm not gonna lie.

913
00:43:29,280 --> 00:43:30,959
Speaker 2: I was like, I mean I wanted to. I wanted

914
00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:32,480
Speaker 2: the workbook to be out there to help people, but

915
00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:34,440
Speaker 2: I didn't want to market it, and I thought like,

916
00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:37,520
Speaker 2: oh my god, it's so much. But then when gegr

917
00:43:37,600 --> 00:43:40,120
Speaker 2: Money came out to your prior girl, it was way more.

918
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:42,759
Speaker 2: I mean, I did like eighty podcasts, like every show

919
00:43:42,760 --> 00:43:45,120
Speaker 2: you can imagine, and I didn't feel overwhelmed. Did I

920
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:47,200
Speaker 2: feel like it was a lot of work. But I

921
00:43:47,280 --> 00:43:49,239
Speaker 2: was having such a good time. Remember I came up

922
00:43:49,280 --> 00:43:51,960
Speaker 2: here excited, and when I said what was the difference,

923
00:43:52,040 --> 00:43:55,120
Speaker 2: it was the perspective one Gerrau was still here. I

924
00:43:55,160 --> 00:43:57,600
Speaker 2: didn't realize that when Maide Whole came out, he passed

925
00:43:57,600 --> 00:44:02,560
Speaker 2: away in November November sixteenth, and made Whole came out

926
00:44:02,640 --> 00:44:07,400
Speaker 2: November twenty. First, I didn't give grief enough credit that

927
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:10,600
Speaker 2: I didn't realize that I was. That time of year

928
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:12,560
Speaker 2: was hard. I didn't honestly, I was like, what's wrong

929
00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:15,239
Speaker 2: with you? Tifany that? Like, girl, why did you have

930
00:44:15,280 --> 00:44:17,960
Speaker 2: this book come out in November? You know, because that

931
00:44:17,960 --> 00:44:21,200
Speaker 2: doesn't make sense, you know, because I was heavily grieving,

932
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:23,359
Speaker 2: but did not know that I was, because I was like, oh,

933
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:25,600
Speaker 2: it's been two years. Of course, I know I'm always

934
00:44:25,640 --> 00:44:28,440
Speaker 2: gonna grieve, but I didn't realize that. I didn't know

935
00:44:28,719 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 2: that grief could have a heavier weight during times a year.

936
00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:34,120
Speaker 2: I guess I just always felt like you're just always grieving.

937
00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:36,080
Speaker 2: It's like, no, there are times of year that it's

938
00:44:36,160 --> 00:44:38,000
Speaker 2: greater than others. So I say all that to say

939
00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:41,640
Speaker 2: that my perspective was these two books. One that was

940
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:43,840
Speaker 2: way more work didn't feel like work, and one that

941
00:44:43,920 --> 00:44:46,120
Speaker 2: was way less felt like too much work because of

942
00:44:46,160 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 2: my perspective. So absolutely it's the internal work. You know that.

943
00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:52,960
Speaker 2: It's like how you see and feel a thing is

944
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:55,920
Speaker 2: how it shows up for you externally. And knowing that

945
00:44:55,960 --> 00:44:58,760
Speaker 2: I'm more mindful, like are there any other trigger days

946
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:02,839
Speaker 2: like our anniversary, his birthday? Like let me be mindful?

947
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:05,520
Speaker 2: Like girl, Like if you're feeling heavy and you're like

948
00:45:05,560 --> 00:45:08,440
Speaker 2: I don't know what's wrong, you know like, oh, this

949
00:45:08,560 --> 00:45:11,000
Speaker 2: could be the reason. And so I love that that

950
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:15,880
Speaker 2: you're realizing that, like, okay, that this internal work, you know,

951
00:45:16,120 --> 00:45:18,920
Speaker 2: my perspective will shift how I see and how I

952
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:21,400
Speaker 2: navigate the world. And you don't ever want to be

953
00:45:21,480 --> 00:45:23,279
Speaker 2: right about the wrong thing. You ever see somebody who

954
00:45:23,360 --> 00:45:26,040
Speaker 2: was like, well everything just sucks, It's like, well, why

955
00:45:26,040 --> 00:45:28,720
Speaker 2: would you want to win that battle. That life is terrible.

956
00:45:28,760 --> 00:45:30,239
Speaker 2: I don't want to win that battle. I don't want

957
00:45:30,239 --> 00:45:31,800
Speaker 2: to as Monique.

958
00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:34,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just didn't like the way my it was bad.

959
00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:38,200
Speaker 3: It was just you're like dragging yourself down.

960
00:45:38,600 --> 00:45:41,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like you argue for your own limitations. That's

961
00:45:41,960 --> 00:45:44,640
Speaker 2: what this woman told me. It was a life changing sentiment.

962
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:47,040
Speaker 2: I was going back and forth here. I was like, oh,

963
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,200
Speaker 2: this is not working. The business is not doing so good.

964
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:51,279
Speaker 2: And she was like, why don't you try this? I

965
00:45:51,320 --> 00:45:52,919
Speaker 2: was like, no, that's not going to work. Why don't

966
00:45:52,960 --> 00:45:55,000
Speaker 2: you going to work? She said, Oh, I get it.

967
00:45:55,120 --> 00:45:57,040
Speaker 2: I'm not doing this with you. You're arguing for your

968
00:45:57,040 --> 00:45:57,959
Speaker 2: own limitations.

969
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:01,319
Speaker 3: I was like, that's exactly what I'm doing doing. I

970
00:46:01,400 --> 00:46:03,040
Speaker 3: was like, Wolse is always dirty. It's just going to

971
00:46:03,080 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 3: be dirty. Yes, it doesn't matter if I clean it.

972
00:46:05,040 --> 00:46:06,200
Speaker 3: And now I live in a dirty house and I'm

973
00:46:06,200 --> 00:46:07,359
Speaker 3: a dirty person and knowing I.

974
00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:09,160
Speaker 2: Mean, And she's like, why would you want to win

975
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:09,600
Speaker 2: that war?

976
00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:11,439
Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, you win.

977
00:46:11,600 --> 00:46:15,960
Speaker 2: You're right, life's surrendered, yes, and so one you realize

978
00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:18,000
Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't want to argue for I don't

979
00:46:18,000 --> 00:46:21,040
Speaker 2: want to win if I'm arguing for less of a

980
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:22,879
Speaker 2: life for myself. Why would I want to win that?

981
00:46:23,440 --> 00:46:25,400
Speaker 2: And so I'm like, no, we're not doing that, Tiffany. No,

982
00:46:25,800 --> 00:46:27,319
Speaker 2: So I love that. So I just say all that

983
00:46:27,320 --> 00:46:28,399
Speaker 2: that's to say that I love that.

984
00:46:29,160 --> 00:46:31,200
Speaker 3: As I mopped the floor, I'm like, this might be

985
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:32,880
Speaker 3: a little too far. I'm like, I'm so grateful I

986
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:34,920
Speaker 3: have a floor. Yeah, I look at this house that

987
00:46:34,960 --> 00:46:36,440
Speaker 3: we bought, and let's take some pride in it.

988
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:39,360
Speaker 2: To the fact that I don't think we take for

989
00:46:39,400 --> 00:46:41,560
Speaker 2: granted the fact that you can walk, you can see,

990
00:46:41,640 --> 00:46:43,000
Speaker 2: you can hear, you can.

991
00:46:42,960 --> 00:46:44,120
Speaker 3: Yes, you know what I mean.

992
00:46:44,360 --> 00:46:47,560
Speaker 2: Like, there's so much like, you know, we I think

993
00:46:47,600 --> 00:46:49,440
Speaker 2: about that all the time. I have friends who have

994
00:46:49,520 --> 00:46:52,600
Speaker 2: trouble walking, you know, my friends who have trouble seeing,

995
00:46:52,760 --> 00:46:55,120
Speaker 2: Like they're like, I'm slowly losing my sight. I have

996
00:46:55,200 --> 00:46:57,880
Speaker 2: friends who you know what I mean, and it's just like, Wow,

997
00:46:57,960 --> 00:46:59,880
Speaker 2: we take for granted a thing until that thing is

998
00:46:59,880 --> 00:47:00,520
Speaker 2: not there.

999
00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:02,920
Speaker 3: Can I just say, for the record, I'm really grateful

1000
00:47:02,920 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 3: for my left hip because she is very creaky and

1001
00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:10,560
Speaker 3: I need her to last me another like fifties. And

1002
00:47:10,600 --> 00:47:14,359
Speaker 3: I'm like, baby girl, you like need to work on this.

1003
00:47:14,600 --> 00:47:15,799
Speaker 3: I want to help you.

1004
00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:18,399
Speaker 2: I will say that if you have me. So if

1005
00:47:18,400 --> 00:47:21,200
Speaker 2: you have a treadmill, walking backwards helps to actually strengthen

1006
00:47:21,200 --> 00:47:23,480
Speaker 2: your knees. Because I helped. My knees were creaky.

1007
00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:26,640
Speaker 3: I said, I know everything is weak as my body is.

1008
00:47:26,760 --> 00:47:29,160
Speaker 3: I need to do heavy weight lifting it is, Yes,

1009
00:47:29,560 --> 00:47:29,960
Speaker 3: I need to.

1010
00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:33,320
Speaker 2: Jumping rope helps too, you know, with them with bone density.

1011
00:47:33,400 --> 00:47:34,279
Speaker 2: Just so you know, I.

1012
00:47:34,239 --> 00:47:35,600
Speaker 3: Did go through a jump rope phase.

1013
00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:41,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, we take I love that, you said. I was

1014
00:47:41,080 --> 00:47:42,360
Speaker 2: looking at my jump with the other day.

1015
00:47:42,560 --> 00:47:45,319
Speaker 3: It was looking at girl. Yes, you know.

1016
00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:47,600
Speaker 2: I told us, I said, let me get my osteoporosis,

1017
00:47:47,800 --> 00:47:49,839
Speaker 2: anti osteoporosis, or I wanted to get my jump.

1018
00:47:50,320 --> 00:47:52,040
Speaker 3: Listen, if you want to rock with us into our

1019
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:56,239
Speaker 3: forties and fifties, they're going to have a lot of paramenopozzle, osteoporosis,

1020
00:47:56,280 --> 00:47:59,240
Speaker 3: bone density, chatter, and y'all welcome to come along.

1021
00:47:59,400 --> 00:48:02,359
Speaker 2: Okay, Because as a as a terror taper that Brown

1022
00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:04,759
Speaker 2: calls it Perry. She said, why ain't y'all tell me

1023
00:48:04,800 --> 00:48:08,680
Speaker 2: about Perry? Got over here sweating, not sleeping to the night.

1024
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:13,239
Speaker 3: I love it so much, the bridge so that I

1025
00:48:13,239 --> 00:48:14,160
Speaker 3: can follow behind me.

1026
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:16,759
Speaker 2: So I love that she's normalizing. I'm like, oh, is

1027
00:48:16,760 --> 00:48:18,360
Speaker 2: that Perry. I don't know if I'm in Perry. I

1028
00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:19,880
Speaker 2: guess I got ask my doctor. I don't think so.

1029
00:48:19,960 --> 00:48:23,600
Speaker 2: But you never know. You never have mercy. But we're

1030
00:48:23,600 --> 00:48:25,400
Speaker 2: gonna see you guys on Friday for b A q A.

1031
00:48:26,680 --> 00:48:28,920
Speaker 2: Thank you for rocking with us. You know, from single

1032
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:32,360
Speaker 2: girls out and about to marry, girls in the house

1033
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:40,920
Speaker 2: to Mama's to Lord Creaky. We're gonna be the nursing

1034
00:48:40,960 --> 00:48:45,759
Speaker 2: home like, hey, y'all, Hey, hey, what's my name again?

1035
00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:46,440
Speaker 2: What day is it?

1036
00:48:47,840 --> 00:48:51,319
Speaker 3: I don't want to hear this time for the q

1037
00:48:51,520 --> 00:49:00,840
Speaker 3: A baby, I went.

1038
00:49:00,760 --> 00:49:07,319
Speaker 2: Y'all on Friday, So can you lay there? Bye?

1039
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:08,760
Speaker 3: Mhm