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Speaker 1: I'm Bradley Johnson. What's one eight hundred duy away. Not

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Speaker 1: getting behind the wheel after drinking is the best choice,

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Speaker 1: but if you're pulled over, the next best choice it's

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Speaker 1: to call one eight hundred d u y away. As

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Speaker 1: on the twenties, I'm moving nine point five. Hello. Hi,

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Speaker 1: is this Miss Kendra Fromton Junior High School? Yes? It is,

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Speaker 1: oh perfect, Well, Hi, Miss Kendra. My name is Doug

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Speaker 1: and my son Carson is in your English class. Oh

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Speaker 1: my goodness, so nice to finally talk to you. You

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Speaker 1: can just call me Kendra. Oh okay, are you sure? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's perfectly fine. Okay, okay, well, miss Kendra. Kendra, it's

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Speaker 1: nice to meet you. It's nice to meet you too.

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Speaker 1: So how can I help you? Doug? Well, sorry to

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Speaker 1: kind of call out of the blue, but I just

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Speaker 1: wanted to touch base because my son Carson really likes

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Speaker 1: your class. Oh that's so lovely to hear it. Thank you.

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Speaker 1: He says that you're one of the nicest teachers in

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Speaker 1: the school. So don't be mean to me. I promise

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Speaker 1: I won't be mean anyway. So here's the issue that

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Speaker 1: I'm having. Carson, my son asked me the other day

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Speaker 1: an embarrassing question, and I wasn't sure how to handle it.

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Speaker 1: So I thought I would call his favorite teacher for

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Speaker 1: some advice. If that's all right, Oh, okay, I'll try

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Speaker 1: to help this I can. Okay, Well, he likes a

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Speaker 1: girl named Amber in his school, and he thinks that

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Speaker 1: Amber likes him too. Oh, I'm sure you deal with

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Speaker 1: young love all the time. There all the time, lots

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Speaker 1: of notes talk between people. Yeah. Anyway, Um, well, here's

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Speaker 1: the issue. He's never kissed a girl before, and so

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Speaker 1: he asked me the other day, he said, Dad, how

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Speaker 1: do you kiss a girl? Um? Don't. I don't know

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Speaker 1: how an English teacher can help, but go on, Well,

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Speaker 1: I think you're more than just an English teacher. You're

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Speaker 1: his favorite teacher. Anyway. I've tried explaining it to him

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Speaker 1: about how to kiss a girl, and he didn't really

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Speaker 1: get it. So I tried showing him and I practiced

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Speaker 1: on a zucchini and videotaped it for him. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: And before I gave him the video, I actually watched

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Speaker 1: it myself, and really I think I did a pretty

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Speaker 1: good job. Congratulations, thank you. I looked at the video

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Speaker 1: and I did use a little tongue, because you've probably

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Speaker 1: heard this too. Most of kids these days, when they're kissing,

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Speaker 1: I hear they're using a lot of tongue. Is that true?

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Speaker 1: You know, I haven't noticed, but I wouldn't be surprised. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: because I wouldn't either. And so I was watching the video.

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Speaker 1: I was using quite a bit of tongue. And I've

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Speaker 1: realized I moaned a few times too. You're not a heavy,

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Speaker 1: loud moan, just more about, oh that kind of a

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Speaker 1: soft moan. Okay. I just don't know how this is

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Speaker 1: relevant to the curriculum. Well, I can understand this might

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Speaker 1: be a confusing conversation, but I will get to the

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Speaker 1: point here in a second. So back to the video.

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Speaker 1: I was watching the video and I didn't realize it either,

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Speaker 1: but I actually started dirty talking the zucchini. I didn't

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Speaker 1: even know that. Yeah. I always calling it naughty names,

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Speaker 1: you know, not nasty or vulgar ones, just you know,

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Speaker 1: kind of saying things like oh, milk, my winkie like

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Speaker 1: a cow, things like that. Oh my god, yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: kind of how I said it too. When I was

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Speaker 1: kissing the zucchini, I was like, oh my god, this

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Speaker 1: is nice. So you know what, I don't need to

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Speaker 1: know anything else. I think this conversation is over. Well,

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Speaker 1: here's where you can help me out, because I went

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Speaker 1: against my better judgment and I showed the video to

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Speaker 1: my son. No, yeah, yeah, I did, and now he

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Speaker 1: won't come out of his room and says that he

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Speaker 1: never wants to kiss anybody as long as he lives.

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Speaker 1: So I made a parenting mistake there, Yeah, I would say. So,

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Speaker 1: you know, I don't even think it's my fault. I

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Speaker 1: think he has intimacy issues from his mother. I'm sure

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Speaker 1: it doesn't have anything to do with the video. It's

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Speaker 1: probably just, you know, his mom. She's not as passionate

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Speaker 1: as she should be. So this is very personal, and

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Speaker 1: I'm just an English teacher. I'm going to stare with it. Well,

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Speaker 1: how about this. Do you think you could chat with

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Speaker 1: him about the whole situation. I can send to the

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Speaker 1: video for reference if you'd like to see it. No,

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Speaker 1: you know what, I hey, I don't know that. No,

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Speaker 1: this seems like it's not quite a situation that I

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Speaker 1: should have a hand in. I think it's between you

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Speaker 1: and Carson. Well, I mean, if there's just any way

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Speaker 1: you could talk to him about how to properly kiss

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Speaker 1: somebody or how to properly do a prank phone call.

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Speaker 1: Either one of those situations would work for me. I'd

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Speaker 1: really appreciate it. I'm sorry, what's going on? Oh well,

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Speaker 1: what's going on is that this is actually Jewel from

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Speaker 1: Brook and Jewel in the Morning doing a phone tap

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Speaker 1: on you and your friend Danny set you up. No, yes,

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Speaker 1: oh my god. Really he told me that you just

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Speaker 1: started teaching junior high school and wanted to play a

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Speaker 1: joke on you from a fake parent. Do you think

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Speaker 1: milk my Weekend like a Cow was a little too far?

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Speaker 1: In the video? That was that was really fun? Might

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Speaker 1: have been it wake Up every Morning with Jubal phone

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Speaker 1: taps weekday mornings on the twenties, Holy On Moving ninety

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Speaker 1: two point five