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Speaker 1: Buckle up, hold on tight. Here it is a Strawberry

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Speaker 1: letter subject married and celibate, Dear Stephen Shirley. For the

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Speaker 1: past twenty three years, I've been married to the nicest

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Speaker 1: guy in the world, and I have always tried to

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Speaker 1: be the perfect wife and mother. In the beginning of

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Speaker 1: our marriage, our sex life was perfect, but over the

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Speaker 1: past seven years things have drastically changed. In twenty eighteen,

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Speaker 1: we had sex maybe eight times in the whole year.

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Speaker 1: I counted them. I don't think he's cheating because all

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Speaker 1: he does is go to work and come home. If

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Speaker 1: he goes out, we go out as a family. I

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Speaker 1: just don't think that he is that he's interested in

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Speaker 1: sex at all. He is completely complacent, and I've stopped

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Speaker 1: initiating sex because I get tired of him telling me

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Speaker 1: to move all the time. Move, he comes to be, yes,

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Speaker 1: he comes to bed to watch TV, and that's how

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Speaker 1: he falls asleep each night. When I told him that

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Speaker 1: I need sex regularly, he told me that sex should

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Speaker 1: not be everything in a marriage. That shocked me and

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Speaker 1: hurt me to the core because I'm only forty five

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Speaker 1: years old and sex is everything to me. It made

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Speaker 1: me feel inadequate and if he's tired of me, And

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Speaker 1: as if he's tired of me, how does he expect

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Speaker 1: to just stop having sex with his wife and it

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Speaker 1: will be okay? And nothing has changed with me physically?

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Speaker 1: With me, I am the same size I was when

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Speaker 1: we got married, and I have aged well. I confide

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Speaker 1: it in my older sisters about my embarrassing little secret

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Speaker 1: because I needed to know if this is normal behavior

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Speaker 1: in a marriage. They told me that it's not normal,

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Speaker 1: and they think my husband is lame and needs to

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Speaker 1: step up as a man. On the outside, our marriage

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Speaker 1: looks so perfect, but on the inside, I'm constantly craving

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Speaker 1: intimacy and sneaking around to have special times by myself

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Speaker 1: to fulfill my needs. I can't live the rest of

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Speaker 1: my life in a sexless marriage. How can I get

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Speaker 1: my husband to see that this is a problem and

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Speaker 1: we need help? Please advise, Well, you're right, this is

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Speaker 1: a problem. This is an epic problem. You cannot live

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Speaker 1: the rest of your life in a sexless marriage, and

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Speaker 1: you shouldn't be expected to. I mean, you've been married

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Speaker 1: to this man for twenty three years. You said in

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Speaker 1: the beginning the sex life was perfect, but over the

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Speaker 1: past seven years, it hasn't been. You can count them

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Speaker 1: on your both hands how many times you've had it.

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Speaker 1: That's a long time to go, you know, without sex

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Speaker 1: on the regular. I'm not a man, obviously, I don't

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Speaker 1: know exactly what's going on in your husband's head, but

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Speaker 1: usually sex is the thing that healthy, red blooded American

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Speaker 1: men think about the most. I mean that's what I've heard, guys. Guys, Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: thank you. And although you didn't matter, now this letter

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Speaker 1: makes you think about it. Although you didn't say it, um, wifie,

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Speaker 1: but um, I'm gonna say it. I say your husband

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Speaker 1: may have ed. I mean, he just might have that

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Speaker 1: it rectiles his function and he probably needs to see

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Speaker 1: a doctor. I mean, I think you need to look

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Speaker 1: into that immediately. I'm definitely, definitely glad to hear that

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Speaker 1: you haven't changed physically. You said that in the letter,

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Speaker 1: And please do not blame yourself. You guys are both

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Speaker 1: in the marriage. This is an US problem. This is

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Speaker 1: a wee problem. You need to go to a doctor

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Speaker 1: and find out what's what's the problem. You need to

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Speaker 1: I know, I know, I said we I know. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: that's what I think. Steve Wow, oh lord, Okay, twenty

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Speaker 1: three years you've been married, nice guy, tried to be

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Speaker 1: the perfect wife. You had the marriage, sex life perfect.

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Speaker 1: But the past seven years things has happened drastically. In

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Speaker 1: twenty eighteen, we had sex maybe eight times a whole year.

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Speaker 1: That ain't good when they know the number, fellas, that

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Speaker 1: is not good when she knows the number eight times.

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Speaker 1: Last year we had moved sixty that no, he didn't

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Speaker 1: eight damn time. She don't think he's cheating because he

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Speaker 1: worked all the time and he comes straight home. I

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Speaker 1: don't think that he's interested in sex at all. He

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Speaker 1: is completely complacent, and I've stopped initiating sex because I

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Speaker 1: get tired of mood telling me to move all the time. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's that's crazy. Steve could be another problem. I think

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Speaker 1: he got ed. That's what I think he got and

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Speaker 1: think is messing old boil and so he comes to

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Speaker 1: bed watch TV and how he that's how he falls asleep.

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Speaker 1: When I told him I kneed sex regularly, he told

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Speaker 1: me that the sec should not be everything in the marriage.

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Speaker 1: Well where do it fit with you? Though? Yeah? If

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Speaker 1: sex ain't everything in the marriage, where should it be? Y'all?

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Speaker 1: Just want a piano in a sandbox. What y'all want

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Speaker 1: slid as a seesaw and a drum set? Make up

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Speaker 1: your mind, partner, Let me go back over this, y'all.

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Speaker 1: The past seven years day sex was good, but some

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Speaker 1: stuff happened. In twenty eighteen, we had sex maybe eight

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Speaker 1: times the whole year. Like I said, once they know

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Speaker 1: a number, you in trouble. She says, she don't think

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Speaker 1: he's interested in sex at all. He's completely complacent, and

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Speaker 1: I've started initiated the sexually. I got moved girl, gone, girl, gone,

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Speaker 1: what you're doing? Nah? Not now? Stop touching me? Damn

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Speaker 1: you wear so when you hear that? When gone? Now?

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Speaker 1: When I told him and I need sex regularly, he

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Speaker 1: told me the section not be everything in the marriage.

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Speaker 1: That's the hell of a statement. That shocked me. It

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Speaker 1: shocked me too, ma'am. I'm reading the letter, damn, and

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Speaker 1: I'm shocked. Section not be everything in the man? Well,

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Speaker 1: what is in that fold? Then I need all of

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Speaker 1: mine in there? I know. That shocked me and it

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Speaker 1: hurt me to the core because I'm only forty five

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Speaker 1: and sexes everything to me makes me feel inadequate. And

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Speaker 1: if he's and as if he's tired of me. I

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Speaker 1: think that might be it, though I think that's got

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Speaker 1: a lot to do it. I think after seven years

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Speaker 1: people get a little comfortable with each other, and that's

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Speaker 1: why we have the seven year itches, a syndrome that

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Speaker 1: happens to people at the seven year mark, they start

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Speaker 1: started wanting to scratch that itch. Is he cheating? Do

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Speaker 1: you think? She says, she doesn't think he is. She's

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Speaker 1: both a married but they only has sex eight times

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Speaker 1: in two thousand last year. Yeah, she wants him to

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Speaker 1: do more now, well, yeah, this is a new year. Yeah, Steve,

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Speaker 1: she said she doesn't think he's cheating. Do you think

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Speaker 1: he's cheating? She said? All he does is go to

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Speaker 1: work and come home and if they do go out,

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Speaker 1: they go out as a family. Well, I don't think

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Speaker 1: he's cheating. I think he might have ed. Oh, I

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Speaker 1: think he tired of him. And then she says, how

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Speaker 1: does he expect it to just be okay? To stop

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Speaker 1: having sex with his wife and it be okay? Nothing

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Speaker 1: has changed with me physically. I'm the same. I wore

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Speaker 1: the same size I was when we got married. Ain't

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Speaker 1: nobody the same size? Sorry? Nobody? Uh Steve, Huh, she

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Speaker 1: said it. She's the same size, she las. Sure he's

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Speaker 1: telling the truth about everything else, but just that she's lying.

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Speaker 1: She gained no weight, she said, she's the same size. Sure,

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Speaker 1: everybody looking at mirror and think they the same. Everybody

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Speaker 1: the same size I was in high school. But everything

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Speaker 1: else she's telling the truth, but just this one line

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Speaker 1: she's lying. Well, she's lying a couple of times in

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Speaker 1: the letter where else. They told me that it's not normal,

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Speaker 1: and they think my husband is lame. I confided in

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Speaker 1: my older sisters about my embarrassing little secret because I

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Speaker 1: needed to know if this was normal behavior in the marriage.

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Speaker 1: They told me that it's not normal, and they think

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Speaker 1: my husband is lame and needs to step up as

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Speaker 1: a man. On the outside of our marriage looks so perfect,

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Speaker 1: but on the inside, I'm constantly craving intrinacy, sneaking around

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Speaker 1: to have special times by myself to fulfill my needs.

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Speaker 1: So she going somewhere by herself to fulfill her knees.

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Speaker 1: And once you tell it to that to him, he'll

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Speaker 1: crack open. All right, right, now, that's what it is. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm still stuck on I'm the same size as I

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Speaker 1: was when we got married and I have aged. Well,

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Speaker 1: we need to bring in some evidence. What evidence can

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Speaker 1: she provide? Yeah? Like a picture. She can send a

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Speaker 1: picture addressing here. Although I'm taking her at her word,

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Speaker 1: you gotta nay some evidence in front of me. Evidence

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Speaker 1: is in the letter. Everything else you believe that she

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Speaker 1: said in the letter, and just this one line on

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Speaker 1: the same size as I was when we got married

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Speaker 1: and I have aged. Well, what you want evidence this age? Well? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: like let's see your shoe from like two thousand and sixteen,

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Speaker 1: then your shoe from two thousand nineteen. We are now

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Speaker 1: blaming three shooting your foot didn't got water in three years?

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Speaker 1: If your foot didn't got water, there's more weight. What

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Speaker 1: is she gonna do about her husband that's not interested

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Speaker 1: in having sex with her anymore? And his eed that's

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Speaker 1: the problem. Yeah, I do too, said that it was. Well,

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Speaker 1: we're all in agreement on it. I think so too.

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Speaker 1: So when that happens, Steve, why why won't he go

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Speaker 1: to the doctor? I mean and get some pills? Right?

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Speaker 1: Were working on your men? You guys are men? Three

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Speaker 1: men is working? Okay? But what about your fellow man? Oh,

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Speaker 1: I ain't never asked my homeboy, dog, you ain't. I

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Speaker 1: can't pay that conversation up. Men know how that comes.

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Speaker 1: We don't have it. You all don't what na but Jim,

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Speaker 1: I'm dysfunctioned. What you okay? When it started? We don't

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Speaker 1: have you all are so infantile and juvenile they are

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Speaker 1: so I mean, But what advice would you give someone though?

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Speaker 1: That's the issue? Another man? What would you say to

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Speaker 1: him if you know, if you suspect he has ed?

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Speaker 1: I mean, would you tell him to go to the

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Speaker 1: doctor and get some pills or what? What's up? Dog? Huh?

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Speaker 1: Ain't nothing up? Let me okay, So y'all a conversation

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Speaker 1: where y'all boys, and you'd be like yo, man, my

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Speaker 1: old lady tripping. You know, she didn't want to get

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Speaker 1: busy all the time. I ain't got the strength of

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Speaker 1: the energy got ahead them kind of man. Do you

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Speaker 1: know Joseph's about the fire off and this car? Man,

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Speaker 1: what you ain't ready for that one? Because the mantcho

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Speaker 1: your ego. Man, let you admit that. It just won't

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Speaker 1: let you admit that to another man. But if I

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Speaker 1: find out somebody going down there, bring me a couple

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Speaker 1: of them peeled back dog. Just let let your boy

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Speaker 1: hold some of them. If you're going down there to

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Speaker 1: the dog doctor. Uh huh, yeah, yeah, I want to couple.

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Speaker 1: You want what if you're going down there telling me

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Speaker 1: seeing you two of them yellow peals and give me them?

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Speaker 1: What a yellow pill? How do you know what color

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Speaker 1: they are? Oh? Yeah, you know what. I ain't got

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Speaker 1: nothing to do with this day. And let the man

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Speaker 1: going on? Man, you knew what color was? Yeah? You

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Speaker 1: red and a great white shawl color. So so okay,

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Speaker 1: so we have something here. She needs to tell her

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Speaker 1: husband to go to the doctor and get some yellow pills.

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Speaker 1: According to Tommy, then Milli Graham, mill you know the

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Speaker 1: strength of the prescription ten mill of Graham. Wow? Is

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Speaker 1: you know you can't ask phill us to help you

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Speaker 1: with situation like that? You get asked, Yeah, I've just

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Speaker 1: learned something on the show. I definitely have Like we

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Speaker 1: fight before you get started up, take your jump. Okay,

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Speaker 1: well then hook theme to your backsat and see if

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Speaker 1: you can't jilt yourself back on the games. Why yellow

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Speaker 1: try now? Yellow yellow pills ten milligrams? All right, Look,

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Speaker 1: we gotta get out of two drink a lot of water.

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Speaker 1: All right, guy, you heard it here on the Steve

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. We're here for you, Okay, Email us

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Speaker 1: Steve Harvey f M. You're listening to The Stave Harvey

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Speaker 1: Morning Show