WEBVTT - PATRICIA HEATON: Unexpected 0:00:04.280 --> 0:00:09.560 The daffodils, the tulip seben fading away, the cherry blossoms 0:00:09.640 --> 0:00:15.440 falling in a profusion of soft, rosy petals that remind 0:00:15.480 --> 0:00:19.120 me of fluffy, pink snow drifts in my yard. April 0:00:19.120 --> 0:00:22.880 has nearly worn itself out, But before we bid it goodbye, 0:00:23.680 --> 0:00:26.880 let's take a moment to appreciate all that it delivered 0:00:27.320 --> 0:00:32.040 after winter had its way with us. I also want 0:00:32.080 --> 0:00:35.280 to recognize it for another good reason. April is National 0:00:35.960 --> 0:00:42.200 Infertility Awareness Month. It is a month filled with signs 0:00:42.320 --> 0:00:46.760 of rebirth and renewal. Perhaps that is why it was 0:00:46.880 --> 0:00:51.960 chosen to raise awareness and spread knowledge and hope for 0:00:52.080 --> 0:00:59.520 those experiencing the painful reality of infertility. Because infertility is 0:00:59.720 --> 0:01:02.920 a problem and it's getting more common all the time. 0:01:03.320 --> 0:01:07.200 About twelve percent of couples experience it. But the unique 0:01:07.440 --> 0:01:14.360 circumstances of couples and individuals can make infertility sufferers feel very, 0:01:14.720 --> 0:01:21.000 very alone. They're not there is A beautiful film called Unexpected. 0:01:21.720 --> 0:01:26.520 Unexpected was originally released back in twenty twenty three, but 0:01:26.600 --> 0:01:29.959 it's now streaming on Prime Video. It's about a couple 0:01:30.160 --> 0:01:35.960 struggling with infertility and how they navigate life's unexpected twists 0:01:36.000 --> 0:01:40.560 that lead them on a heartfelt, humorous journey towards a 0:01:40.640 --> 0:01:45.880 family they never saw coming. Here's a synopsis of the movie. 0:01:46.040 --> 0:01:51.200 Music critic Bob is facing a career setback, increasing anxiety 0:01:51.680 --> 0:01:56.520 and the daily chaos created by the animals his wife 0:01:56.560 --> 0:02:01.040 Amy has brought into their home. Amy Key bringing animals 0:02:01.080 --> 0:02:05.240 home common theme in my life. While grappling with the 0:02:05.240 --> 0:02:09.720 weight of infertility, the couple faces acrossroads. Will adopting a 0:02:09.760 --> 0:02:13.600 baby be the answer to their search for meaning fulfillment 0:02:13.720 --> 0:02:17.799 and family. It is produced by Today's podcast guest I'm 0:02:17.840 --> 0:02:21.360 going to be talking with the extremely funny and talented 0:02:21.760 --> 0:02:25.760 Patricia Heaton. She worked on this movie with her production partner, 0:02:25.800 --> 0:02:29.600 her husband, David Hunt. Patricia best known for her role 0:02:29.639 --> 0:02:33.520 on the beloved and critically acclaimed series Everybody Loves Raymond. 0:02:34.200 --> 0:02:38.960 For her nine season portrayal of Raymond's wife, Deborah, she 0:02:39.120 --> 0:02:44.160 received seven consecutive Primetime Emmy nominations, winning for Best Actress 0:02:44.160 --> 0:02:47.040 in a Comedy twice. She then followed that up with 0:02:47.120 --> 0:02:51.639 another nine season starring run on the ABC comedy The Middle. 0:02:52.160 --> 0:02:56.200 Patricia is with us today. I adore her work, I 0:02:56.240 --> 0:02:59.680 adore what I know of her life. Her faith, her family. 0:03:00.200 --> 0:03:02.920 I can't wait to share some time with her ride 0:03:03.000 --> 0:03:06.320 after I share some love with one of my podcast sponsors. 0:03:07.360 --> 0:03:10.760 Have you been looking for a milk replacement because you 0:03:10.840 --> 0:03:15.720 have dairy allergies or sensitivities. 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Yeah, hello, welcome to Love Someone 0:04:57.760 --> 0:04:58.680 with Delilah. 0:04:59.560 --> 0:05:00.560 Thanks for having me. 0:05:00.839 --> 0:05:03.159 I am so glad we're doing this on zoom. Although 0:05:03.160 --> 0:05:06.719 our listeners can't see it, I get to see you 0:05:06.800 --> 0:05:09.719 in fangirl for a minute. I don't fangirl very often 0:05:10.080 --> 0:05:14.640 because I've worked nights for forty five years. Fifty years 0:05:15.560 --> 0:05:18.359 I've done the night shift. So I am probably the 0:05:18.400 --> 0:05:21.839 only person in America that, like, never watched a single 0:05:21.880 --> 0:05:25.120 episode of Dallas, you know, back in the day, or 0:05:25.360 --> 0:05:29.080 I've never seen I've never seen any of the talent 0:05:29.160 --> 0:05:33.080 shows you know, America's got talent or whatever, unless I 0:05:33.080 --> 0:05:34.880 see them, you know, on my computer and the little 0:05:34.920 --> 0:05:35.960 clips they send out. 0:05:36.320 --> 0:05:36.400 Right. 0:05:36.720 --> 0:05:39.960 But back when, back in the day, I would record you. 0:05:40.520 --> 0:05:42.680 Oh that's lovely. 0:05:42.480 --> 0:05:45.400 And that's how I figured out how to use the 0:05:45.480 --> 0:05:48.760 recording device so I could record you, because. 0:05:48.480 --> 0:05:49.599 Yeah, fantastic. 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:54.000 You make me laugh and you're just so I'm fangirling 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:54.640 for a moment. 0:05:55.240 --> 0:05:56.560 Okay, I'll take it. 0:05:56.800 --> 0:06:01.239 You are, and you're even more beautiful, like you're so beautiful. 0:06:01.720 --> 0:06:07.280 My podcast producer runs things by me and she's like, well, 0:06:07.279 --> 0:06:08.880 how would you like to talk to this person? How 0:06:08.920 --> 0:06:11.359 would you like to talk to that person? And she 0:06:12.120 --> 0:06:13.920 reached out to me and she said, I already know 0:06:14.000 --> 0:06:16.120 the answer, but I still have to get the official 0:06:17.160 --> 0:06:19.200 So how would you like to talk to Patercia Heaton? 0:06:19.600 --> 0:06:23.240 And you you're one of those people that we all 0:06:23.520 --> 0:06:27.400 I think everybody feels like you're our friend. We've seen you, 0:06:27.400 --> 0:06:30.080 You've been a part of our lives for so many decades. 0:06:31.720 --> 0:06:34.920 Like when you popped up on my screen, I'm like, oh, yeah, 0:06:34.960 --> 0:06:39.080 there she is. I've never met you before. But do 0:06:39.120 --> 0:06:40.760 you get that a lot? Like people feel like you're 0:06:40.800 --> 0:06:41.480 their best friend? 0:06:42.240 --> 0:06:45.440 Yes, And they relate to my characters that I've played, 0:06:45.560 --> 0:06:48.880 and both Everybody Loves Raymond and The Middle are on 0:06:49.160 --> 0:06:52.680 all the time, and people often tell me they go 0:06:52.720 --> 0:06:55.520 to bed with one show or the other. A lot 0:06:55.520 --> 0:06:57.800 of people go to sleep to Raymond and watch The 0:06:57.839 --> 0:07:02.200 Middle with their whole family and binge it and rewatch 0:07:02.240 --> 0:07:07.599 it and picked up, you know, sayings from the show. 0:07:09.200 --> 0:07:11.400 It kind of becomes a part of your vernacular. 0:07:11.920 --> 0:07:16.240 Yeah, and it sort of becomes a tapestry, part of 0:07:16.280 --> 0:07:19.280 the tapestry of the like the background of your life 0:07:19.840 --> 0:07:23.480 or the environment. Just the way when you're a teenager 0:07:23.560 --> 0:07:27.800 and you hear certain songs from the past, it evokes 0:07:27.840 --> 0:07:32.200 that period of your life. And I think that comedies 0:07:32.240 --> 0:07:36.680 can do that too. And the thing about Raymond in particular, 0:07:36.720 --> 0:07:40.200 but The Middle has quite a wide international reach. Also, 0:07:40.920 --> 0:07:45.720 they both have universal themes about family that anybody in 0:07:45.760 --> 0:07:49.560 any country can relate to. In the Raymond it was 0:07:49.760 --> 0:07:55.200 really about marriage and in laws, and then The Middle 0:07:55.280 --> 0:08:00.280 is about raising kids from grade school to teens high school. 0:08:01.040 --> 0:08:05.679 So and everybody in the world can relate to those things. 0:08:05.720 --> 0:08:11.560 So and they're timeless also Raymond in particular, but also 0:08:11.560 --> 0:08:17.640 pretty much with The Middle. They never did topical episodes, 0:08:17.720 --> 0:08:20.920 you know, so that the show's never dated because they're 0:08:20.960 --> 0:08:25.400 not talking about whatever the administration was current at that time, 0:08:25.560 --> 0:08:28.920 and there's no political things it's really about these. 0:08:28.800 --> 0:08:31.080 Broad universal. 0:08:32.679 --> 0:08:38.560 Values and situations that anyone who's married with kids has 0:08:38.600 --> 0:08:39.040 dealt with. 0:08:40.120 --> 0:08:42.240 And now we're going to talk about a movie that 0:08:42.360 --> 0:08:46.280 kind of wraps all those themes up together with Unexpected, 0:08:46.280 --> 0:08:48.440 which came out two years ago, but now it's available 0:08:48.480 --> 0:08:52.319 on Prime, so right, for those folks who never leave 0:08:52.400 --> 0:08:55.920 the house anymore. Until it's available on Prime, it's not 0:08:56.040 --> 0:08:57.199 really out there. 0:08:57.440 --> 0:09:01.559 That's right. And one of the reasons we've decided to. 0:09:03.040 --> 0:09:08.840 Promote it again now is that it's National Infertility Awareness months. 0:09:09.760 --> 0:09:14.760 And though Unexpected, with Anna Camp and Joe Mazzello as 0:09:14.760 --> 0:09:22.280 our stars, is a quirky comedy about a marriage, but 0:09:22.400 --> 0:09:26.600 it's dealing with the idea of struggling with infertility, struggling 0:09:26.640 --> 0:09:29.640 with the question of whether to adopt or not. And 0:09:30.040 --> 0:09:34.360 our couple, Bob and Amy, are on different pages about 0:09:35.000 --> 0:09:41.400 adoption and infertility and struggle to get on the same 0:09:41.440 --> 0:09:45.199 page at the same time. And we all have seen 0:09:45.360 --> 0:09:51.160 articles about IVF and surrogacy, and there's all these, you know, 0:09:51.559 --> 0:09:55.200 many articles mostly focused on women naturally, about what you 0:09:55.320 --> 0:09:59.000 go through to try to get pregnant if you're struggling. 0:10:00.520 --> 0:10:04.840 And one of the crew members, a guy said to 0:10:04.960 --> 0:10:07.920 us while we were filming Unexpected. He said, you know, 0:10:08.000 --> 0:10:11.280 you never hear really the male perspective and how a 0:10:11.360 --> 0:10:16.480 man is also being emotionally impacted by this situation. And 0:10:16.520 --> 0:10:20.520 it's really nice to see the man also given space 0:10:20.960 --> 0:10:25.120 in this movie to go through his struggle and we 0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:26.640 see that point of view also. 0:10:27.320 --> 0:10:29.280 So I was very impressed. 0:10:28.880 --> 0:10:30.720 Because this is just a crew guy that I don't 0:10:30.720 --> 0:10:34.480 even know that he's even married, but he, you know, 0:10:34.600 --> 0:10:38.240 was suggesting that we don't get the male perspective and 0:10:38.280 --> 0:10:39.800 the male struggle on this topic. 0:10:39.880 --> 0:10:40.920 So that was. 0:10:42.440 --> 0:10:45.920 An eye opener for me to hear that from a 0:10:45.960 --> 0:10:49.959 male crew member. But it's and of course I love 0:10:50.000 --> 0:10:53.240 comedy and I think comedy is a great way into 0:10:53.280 --> 0:10:58.640 a difficult topic, and so it's it's very quirky. Our 0:10:58.679 --> 0:11:02.040 actors are fantas plastick at a camp and Joe Mazzello, 0:11:02.800 --> 0:11:07.079 and you know, with comedy of you you can kind 0:11:07.080 --> 0:11:10.199 of grab people's hearts through laughter. They kind of open 0:11:10.320 --> 0:11:14.520 up and relax even physically. If you're laughing, your body's 0:11:14.600 --> 0:11:18.520 getting extra oxygen and your serotonin levels are going up. 0:11:18.559 --> 0:11:22.679 And so that when things happen in the movie and 0:11:22.760 --> 0:11:27.160 it takes a slightly more dramatic turn. You're kind of 0:11:27.200 --> 0:11:30.840 open to it, and I think that's what makes this 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:31.920 movie so powerful. 0:11:32.920 --> 0:11:37.000 Comedy does that with everything, whether it's you know, difficult 0:11:38.080 --> 0:11:43.640 subjects like infertility. What a tough topic to talk about, 0:11:43.720 --> 0:11:47.640 to be open about, to deal with. I'm trying to 0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:51.160 think of any other movie or book that I've read 0:11:51.840 --> 0:11:58.160 outside of you know, technical stuff or firsthand experience that 0:11:58.320 --> 0:12:01.800 deals with the topic like it's a part of life. 0:12:01.960 --> 0:12:09.200 It's what so many couples are facing today. 0:12:08.080 --> 0:12:11.319 So many couples, and for so many reasons. I think environmentally, 0:12:13.040 --> 0:12:18.640 you know, I think we're really now paying very close 0:12:18.679 --> 0:12:21.120 attention to what's in our food, what kind of drugs 0:12:21.160 --> 0:12:23.240 we're taking, what we're giving our kids, what's in the 0:12:23.280 --> 0:12:30.840 atmosphere plastic particular particulate matter and everything, you know, those things. 0:12:31.360 --> 0:12:35.199 I saw a study the other day about polyester pants 0:12:37.120 --> 0:12:38.319 and how that affects. 0:12:38.440 --> 0:12:41.280 Oh no, because well, it didn't affect me, because that's 0:12:41.320 --> 0:12:44.600 all I wore in the seventies. I remember a particular 0:12:44.640 --> 0:12:48.240 pair of peach colored, high waisted, thirty inch bell polyester 0:12:48.360 --> 0:12:52.160 pants I got for my sixteenth birthday, which were fabulous, 0:12:52.480 --> 0:12:55.560 But I was able to still have pop out for kids, 0:12:55.640 --> 0:12:56.520 kind of late in life. 0:12:57.160 --> 0:13:00.520 So I'm going to vouch for polyester. 0:13:00.640 --> 0:13:04.600 Yes, I made my mother taught me how to sew 0:13:05.200 --> 0:13:08.120 and what you basically means. She would come and say 0:13:08.200 --> 0:13:09.680 rip it out, rip it out, rip it out, and 0:13:09.679 --> 0:13:13.160 then she would end up finishing the project because but 0:13:13.320 --> 0:13:17.080 she made me the thirty inch bell you know, high 0:13:17.120 --> 0:13:19.040 waist polyester. 0:13:20.320 --> 0:13:21.120 Fantastic. 0:13:21.480 --> 0:13:24.040 You know that was really I had them in white, 0:13:24.040 --> 0:13:25.319 and I had him in pink. 0:13:26.040 --> 0:13:29.720 Okay, And let me say, the seventies are interesting because 0:13:29.760 --> 0:13:35.080 the men looked terrible, horrid, but the women have never 0:13:35.120 --> 0:13:39.600 looked better. You look at farafaucet, this gorgeous hair, right 0:13:39.920 --> 0:13:44.240 these really these clothes like a high waisted polyester, thirty 0:13:44.280 --> 0:13:47.880 inch bell bottom pant is fabulous. Look it makes everybody 0:13:47.920 --> 0:13:51.720 look fantastic. Like the women looked wonderful and the men 0:13:51.760 --> 0:13:52.480 looked terrible. 0:13:52.559 --> 0:13:55.680 Look dorky as I'll get out. Yes, yeah, I saw 0:13:57.559 --> 0:14:00.920 social media posts the other day that what could have 0:14:00.920 --> 0:14:04.680 been me and my best friends hanging out, lazing around 0:14:04.760 --> 0:14:09.400 and leaning against a camaro, you know, and it said 0:14:09.960 --> 0:14:12.320 it said something like, you think you're cool, you will 0:14:12.360 --> 0:14:15.439 never be as badass as your grandma. 0:14:15.559 --> 0:14:15.800 And. 0:14:17.360 --> 0:14:18.000 It's true. 0:14:18.800 --> 0:14:19.440 It's true. 0:14:19.960 --> 0:14:26.800 It's and the guys with their dorky plaid polyester leisure suits, 0:14:26.920 --> 0:14:28.120 what was that about. 0:14:28.320 --> 0:14:30.160 Yeah, and bad haircuts and. 0:14:31.600 --> 0:14:34.800 Yeah, yeah, we still thought they were hot back then. 0:14:34.960 --> 0:14:39.640 So yeah, we didn't have a choice else were we 0:14:39.680 --> 0:14:44.280 going to go. But but just to say that, you know, 0:14:44.360 --> 0:14:48.640 so the environment is a factor, I think in the struggle. 0:14:48.960 --> 0:14:53.480 And then women delaying their. 0:14:55.080 --> 0:14:58.840 Child bearing years until into their thirties, which is what 0:14:58.960 --> 0:15:01.880 happened with me. Didn't have my first son until I 0:15:01.920 --> 0:15:05.920 was thirty five, so and I had, you know, four 0:15:06.920 --> 0:15:11.800 very quick succession. They were born in ninety three, ninety five, 0:15:11.880 --> 0:15:16.560 ninety seven, and ninety nine. So so but and I 0:15:16.640 --> 0:15:18.760 was just very fortunate, you know. I just come from 0:15:19.360 --> 0:15:23.600 a very you know, large sort of Irish Catholic tribe. 0:15:24.120 --> 0:15:27.920 And my mother was one of fifteen kids, and you know, 0:15:28.040 --> 0:15:30.840 all of those fifteen kids had between five and ten 0:15:30.960 --> 0:15:32.200 kids themselves. 0:15:33.280 --> 0:15:36.320 So how many first cousins, like around. 0:15:36.080 --> 0:15:37.359 One hundred first cousins. 0:15:38.400 --> 0:15:43.400 Yeah, And my husband jokes that he's British, and he 0:15:43.520 --> 0:15:45.720 jokes that I had to marry someone out of the 0:15:45.720 --> 0:15:48.120 country just to make sure I wasn't marrying a relative. 0:16:03.280 --> 0:16:06.680 So infertility is certainly not anything you or your family. 0:16:07.280 --> 0:16:13.040 I've not struggled with it, Praise God, but I think 0:16:13.120 --> 0:16:17.240 those are some of the factors. And I think, you know, 0:16:17.280 --> 0:16:21.640 as far as delaying your child bearing until later, I 0:16:21.720 --> 0:16:27.120 kind of understand women doing it twenty years ago, fifteen 0:16:27.160 --> 0:16:33.240 years ago, when we didn't have companies willing to let 0:16:33.280 --> 0:16:34.640 women work remotely. 0:16:35.360 --> 0:16:37.320 I used to work with a group. 0:16:37.080 --> 0:16:41.960 Called Feminists for Life, and they for years, years, way 0:16:41.960 --> 0:16:45.160 before it was cool, way before it was normal, they 0:16:45.200 --> 0:16:49.640 were always pushing and trying to get companies to allow 0:16:50.320 --> 0:16:53.720 what they call telework that time, but we're talking about 0:16:53.720 --> 0:16:57.800 remote work, and nobody was up for it, and then 0:16:57.800 --> 0:17:01.560 the pandemic happened and it was forced upon everyone and 0:17:02.160 --> 0:17:07.720 has become, you know, an option often now, although a 0:17:07.800 --> 0:17:10.040 lot of people are being forced to go back into 0:17:10.080 --> 0:17:12.199 the offices, and there's a case to be made for 0:17:12.240 --> 0:17:17.040 that too, but now there are more, I think options 0:17:17.080 --> 0:17:24.919 for parents in the workplace. So I feel that, you know, 0:17:24.960 --> 0:17:31.360 if you've met your life partner, you know, investigate what 0:17:31.400 --> 0:17:34.760 it would be like to if your company offers any 0:17:34.920 --> 0:17:40.800 kind of that program to work remotely when you're having 0:17:40.840 --> 0:17:46.160 your kids, you should go ahead and do that, because 0:17:46.720 --> 0:17:49.440 it's really tough if you wait and wait and wait, 0:17:49.480 --> 0:17:51.240 and then you get to be in your thirties, your 0:17:51.240 --> 0:17:53.840 mid thirties, and then you find out you're now you're 0:17:53.920 --> 0:18:00.480 struggling to get to conceive. You know, you've you the 0:18:00.560 --> 0:18:01.920 clock is really ticking. 0:18:02.280 --> 0:18:03.359 It's just a reality. 0:18:03.440 --> 0:18:06.000 And it's not a judgment of anybody who waits or whatever. 0:18:06.040 --> 0:18:07.720 I look, I didn't, as I said, I didn't have 0:18:07.760 --> 0:18:10.080 my kids till I was in my thirties. But I 0:18:10.119 --> 0:18:13.040 think trying to take advantage of the way the world 0:18:13.119 --> 0:18:16.639 is now where you have more opportunities to work from home, 0:18:17.800 --> 0:18:20.320 if you can do that and you want to have kids, 0:18:20.400 --> 0:18:22.000 and I would say investigate that. 0:18:22.760 --> 0:18:26.480 Before you hear TikTok TikTok, TikTok TikTok, because then. 0:18:26.320 --> 0:18:29.880 You get stressed, and the stress and the pressure can 0:18:30.040 --> 0:18:33.320 make your body, you know, make it harder for your 0:18:33.320 --> 0:18:35.720 body to conceive when you have that on top of it. 0:18:36.640 --> 0:18:41.480 So your hobby, he's your producing partner, right you guys. 0:18:41.400 --> 0:18:45.320 Were you directed this movie and we both produced it? Unexpected? 0:18:46.280 --> 0:18:49.199 How fun is that like to get to work with 0:18:49.280 --> 0:18:51.280 the person you love the best? 0:18:52.080 --> 0:18:56.320 Oh? Are you married? I am you've clearly never worked 0:18:56.320 --> 0:18:56.919 with your husband. 0:18:57.000 --> 0:19:02.440 Hell no, yeah, well we're working with a Dave. 0:19:02.560 --> 0:19:04.080 We just we have to. 0:19:04.760 --> 0:19:08.240 It's great and we're almost always on the same page, 0:19:08.680 --> 0:19:11.280 but with different styles of working. 0:19:11.359 --> 0:19:13.480 So what we have to do is kind of set 0:19:13.520 --> 0:19:14.080 the rules. 0:19:14.119 --> 0:19:16.879 As long as you have rules and you know where 0:19:16.920 --> 0:19:18.959 the boundaries are when you're working together. 0:19:21.359 --> 0:19:22.359 So what's your work is that? 0:19:22.520 --> 0:19:22.920 It's fine? 0:19:23.680 --> 0:19:26.080 Are you do you? Are you mythoonical? Do you have 0:19:26.119 --> 0:19:26.760 a schedule? 0:19:27.000 --> 0:19:27.160 There? 0:19:27.240 --> 0:19:30.360 Are you hierarchy? Well, so on a set, the director 0:19:30.480 --> 0:19:34.480 is the last word. So he was directing. I was 0:19:34.520 --> 0:19:37.639 sitting next to him at the monitor, but I, you know, 0:19:37.680 --> 0:19:40.159 we're both actors and we love working with actors, and 0:19:40.200 --> 0:19:42.800 I would have my own notes when we would watch, 0:19:42.920 --> 0:19:47.080 like with Unexpected, when we would watch a scene, and 0:19:47.119 --> 0:19:50.399 so we had to just and only the director should 0:19:50.440 --> 0:19:53.280 be going on set to give actors notes after a take, 0:19:54.240 --> 0:19:57.720 and so I have to make sure he didn't leap 0:19:57.760 --> 0:20:00.840 out of his director's chair before I say, what do 0:20:00.880 --> 0:20:02.919 you think about here's my notes? What do you think 0:20:02.920 --> 0:20:05.479 about that? Because I didn't want to be running up 0:20:05.480 --> 0:20:07.959 onto set with him, because they need to only be 0:20:08.000 --> 0:20:10.840 listening to one person or else it gets confusing. So 0:20:10.880 --> 0:20:15.479 there are things like that that we just had to 0:20:15.520 --> 0:20:21.480 make sure we were we were in sync about all 0:20:21.520 --> 0:20:24.600 of that, and you know, we're very opinion it where 0:20:24.640 --> 0:20:28.520 both actors were super opinionated, but for the most part 0:20:28.520 --> 0:20:30.240 we're we're on the same page. 0:20:30.280 --> 0:20:31.760 So and it's fun. 0:20:31.880 --> 0:20:35.960 Yeah, oh my gosh. Making a movie is probably one 0:20:36.000 --> 0:20:38.000 of the hardest things you could do, but it is 0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:40.199 so wonderful when you're in the midst of it, and 0:20:40.200 --> 0:20:43.359 when you're in charge. It's a lot of responsibility, but 0:20:43.920 --> 0:20:47.040 if you have a good crew supporting you, it can. 0:20:46.920 --> 0:20:47.919 Be so much fun. 0:20:48.800 --> 0:20:53.720 And to have that creative control and to see things 0:20:53.720 --> 0:20:56.399 come to life and then to see magic happen that 0:20:56.440 --> 0:20:58.639 you didn't plan. You know, you try to plan, especially 0:20:58.680 --> 0:21:00.680 when you're doing a low budget, you try to plan 0:21:00.960 --> 0:21:04.840 within an inch of your life, uh, so that you 0:21:05.480 --> 0:21:07.720 finish on time every day, you don't run over because 0:21:07.720 --> 0:21:08.480 it's costly. 0:21:10.440 --> 0:21:13.600 And then when you've got that rolling like a machine. 0:21:13.760 --> 0:21:17.399 Sometimes things just happened between the actors or there was 0:21:17.400 --> 0:21:20.000 one there's one scene in the movie where it's sort 0:21:20.040 --> 0:21:23.760 of a more serious moment and one of the one 0:21:23.760 --> 0:21:27.520 of the characters walks out the door and as the 0:21:27.560 --> 0:21:30.680 door shut, it created a little wind in the room 0:21:30.680 --> 0:21:34.920 where this curtain just softly moved after he shut the door, 0:21:34.920 --> 0:21:37.960 which you can't you can't plan, and it just was 0:21:38.040 --> 0:21:40.600 like this beautiful thing where we're all of us have 0:21:40.640 --> 0:21:42.919 the monitor, were like, oh, the curtain. 0:21:43.640 --> 0:21:43.960 You know. 0:21:44.680 --> 0:21:47.880 It's like geeking out now about little things on set 0:21:47.960 --> 0:21:52.600 that make you happy. But it's that kind of magic 0:21:52.640 --> 0:21:56.199 and magic that happens between the actors. And there's a 0:21:56.280 --> 0:22:02.240 there's a scene in the movie. There's a rabbit kind 0:22:02.240 --> 0:22:07.680 of figures prominently in the movie, a live rabbit named Binkie, 0:22:07.720 --> 0:22:11.879 but also a little origami rabbit that is in a 0:22:11.920 --> 0:22:16.479 tiny little boat that sails down this little creek. And 0:22:16.560 --> 0:22:20.760 to watch fifty people standing at this edge of this 0:22:20.800 --> 0:22:25.040 creek just with their fingers crossed, hoping that that little 0:22:25.040 --> 0:22:28.240 origami bunny makes it down this certain way and over 0:22:28.280 --> 0:22:31.000 the waterfall of this creek, you know, and we're like, oh, 0:22:31.160 --> 0:22:31.560 is it going? 0:22:31.680 --> 0:22:33.680 Is it? Oh? I have to do it again because 0:22:33.680 --> 0:22:35.960 he went the wrong way or the bunny tipped over. 0:22:38.320 --> 0:22:43.080 It's some of a ridiculous way of living, but it's 0:22:43.119 --> 0:22:47.320 one of my favorite scenes in the movie because it's 0:22:47.400 --> 0:22:54.280 just so it's shot beautifully by our wonderful DP Alison Andersson, 0:22:55.240 --> 0:23:00.560 and it's just a very moving moment and it's visually 0:23:00.600 --> 0:23:04.280 beautiful and touching with this beautiful music underneath it. So 0:23:04.920 --> 0:23:07.840 those are the kind of things that keep crazies like 0:23:07.960 --> 0:23:10.600 us going because it's an insane business and nobody in 0:23:10.600 --> 0:23:12.119 the right mind would ever pursue it. 0:23:12.280 --> 0:23:12.879 It would have to. 0:23:12.960 --> 0:23:15.879 It just has to be something that's in you that 0:23:15.960 --> 0:23:19.960 you just feel you have stories to tell and they 0:23:20.040 --> 0:23:21.240 must come out. 0:23:21.720 --> 0:23:26.600 So in addition to telling those stories in your acting 0:23:26.720 --> 0:23:30.320 career when you were on camera and in your producing career, 0:23:30.720 --> 0:23:33.960 you've written a book for moms, you've written a book 0:23:34.000 --> 0:23:34.600 for us. 0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:37.160 That can act. 0:23:37.840 --> 0:23:39.840 How to get a job like mine. 0:23:39.880 --> 0:23:43.440 Oh, motherhood in Hollywood? How to get a job like mine? 0:23:43.680 --> 0:23:45.680 I wrote that many many years ago when I was 0:23:45.720 --> 0:23:50.360 on Everybody Loves Raymond. And it's sort of an odd 0:23:50.480 --> 0:23:56.000 autobiography and that it's it's divided into three sections, growing 0:23:56.080 --> 0:23:59.399 up in Cleveland, struggling in New York, and making it 0:23:59.440 --> 0:24:04.000 in Hollywood. So the chapters are not necessarily on a 0:24:04.880 --> 0:24:08.800 start to finish timeline. It's sort of a little bit 0:24:08.840 --> 0:24:16.399 stream of consciousness essays on certain events that happened in 0:24:16.520 --> 0:24:21.919 those three different periods of my life, about things I 0:24:22.000 --> 0:24:25.879 experienced and what I learned. And it is a really 0:24:27.480 --> 0:24:28.400 fun book to write. 0:24:30.119 --> 0:24:34.400 And now you've got four boys, and have they all launched? 0:24:34.520 --> 0:24:37.840 Are they still in the nest on the edge of 0:24:37.880 --> 0:24:40.080 the nesta? Have they flown the nest? 0:24:41.000 --> 0:24:47.639 They've all flown the nest in a sense. And there's 0:24:47.800 --> 0:24:53.080 ages twenty six to thirty one, and they all have jobs, 0:24:55.040 --> 0:24:57.199 but they're still, you know, finding their way. Three of 0:24:57.200 --> 0:25:00.640 them have what I consider serious girlfriend. I think that 0:25:00.680 --> 0:25:03.320 those are going to be their life partners. So we're 0:25:03.359 --> 0:25:05.960 excited about that. And we're just trying to stay alive 0:25:06.040 --> 0:25:08.640 long enough to see grandchildren because that could be a minute. 0:25:09.119 --> 0:25:14.720 So I'll lend you a few, oh, so that we can. 0:25:14.640 --> 0:25:16.960 Give them back after a few hours. Yeah, it'd be great. 0:25:19.680 --> 0:25:22.640 Between my husband and I, we have twenty twenty three 0:25:22.920 --> 0:25:24.639 and one great grand So. 0:25:24.920 --> 0:25:29.320 Oh my goodness. You sound like yeah my mom's family 0:25:29.480 --> 0:25:29.959