WEBVTT - 6 Ways to Transform A Negative Mindset & How to Overcome Fear and Anxiety 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:02.639 The Monks, which I learned to train was constantly asking 0:00:02.680 --> 0:00:06.560 myself why. Every time I wanted something, I would trace 0:00:06.640 --> 0:00:10.000 the why. Is it because of a societal expectation, or 0:00:10.039 --> 0:00:13.920 ego pursuit or a deep value? That three letter word 0:00:14.160 --> 0:00:18.560 is a skeleton key for unlocking your self awareness, and 0:00:18.680 --> 0:00:28.520 self awareness is at the root of self mastery. Hey everyone, 0:00:28.520 --> 0:00:30.800 and I'm so excited because we're going to be adding 0:00:30.880 --> 0:00:33.640 a really special offering onto the back of my solo 0:00:33.720 --> 0:00:37.600 episodes on Fridays. It's my short daily series on Calm, 0:00:37.840 --> 0:00:40.720 the Daily j And let me tell you, it's unlike 0:00:40.760 --> 0:00:44.680 anything else I'm doing. It's part storytelling, part mindfulness with 0:00:44.760 --> 0:00:48.120 a wide range of unique actionable insights, and it's also 0:00:48.200 --> 0:00:50.320 the only place you can meditate with me each and 0:00:50.360 --> 0:00:53.720 every day. I absolutely love all the wisdom was sharing, 0:00:53.840 --> 0:00:56.360 all the lives were changing, and whether you want to 0:00:56.360 --> 0:00:59.840 improve your mindset, your habits, or your relationships, whether you 0:01:00.000 --> 0:01:03.520 on to work on developing more focus, presence or equanimity, 0:01:03.560 --> 0:01:07.280 building a daily Jay routine just seven minutes every day 0:01:07.440 --> 0:01:10.080 can make a huge impact, So make sure to check 0:01:10.080 --> 0:01:12.400 out the session at the end of the podcast, and 0:01:12.440 --> 0:01:15.320 then subscribe to Calm for your daily dose of The 0:01:15.440 --> 0:01:19.000 Daily J Go tocalm dot com, forward slash J for 0:01:19.000 --> 0:01:22.160 forty percent off your membership today. This week we're tackling 0:01:22.160 --> 0:01:26.240 the topic of mindset and how to approach life with focus, perspective, 0:01:26.360 --> 0:01:29.240 and positivity. Of course, if you want to listen to 0:01:29.280 --> 0:01:32.040 the Daily JA every day, you have to subscribe to 0:01:32.120 --> 0:01:35.640 cam so go tocalm dot com, forward slash J for 0:01:35.640 --> 0:01:39.319 forty percent off your membership today. Hey everyone, I'm so 0:01:39.400 --> 0:01:42.800 excited to be speaking with you today about six ways 0:01:42.840 --> 0:01:46.800 to monk switch your mind for growth and resilience. There 0:01:46.840 --> 0:01:49.560 has been a lot of research involving monks that shows 0:01:49.560 --> 0:01:53.360 how monks are really masters of the mind. I detail 0:01:53.440 --> 0:01:55.320 some of it in my books Think Like a Monk. 0:01:55.760 --> 0:02:00.640 For example, several years ago, a monk named yonge minga pachet, 0:02:00.920 --> 0:02:05.400 traveled from Nepal to a research facility in Wisconsin so 0:02:05.480 --> 0:02:10.040 the scientists there could observe his brain activity while he meditated. 0:02:10.800 --> 0:02:13.120 They put a device that looked like a shower cap 0:02:13.200 --> 0:02:16.920 on him and fixed hundreds of senses to his skull, 0:02:17.560 --> 0:02:20.200 and they had him cycle in and out of meditative 0:02:20.240 --> 0:02:23.880 states on Q. Now, if you've ever tried to meditate, 0:02:24.360 --> 0:02:27.760 you sit down and what happens to second you try 0:02:27.800 --> 0:02:30.600 to clear your head, your mind floods with thoughts. Right. 0:02:31.040 --> 0:02:33.079 It takes most of us at least five to ten 0:02:33.120 --> 0:02:36.440 minutes to settle down mentally and get into that meditative 0:02:36.520 --> 0:02:41.519 space if we're lucky. So knowing this, the researchers in 0:02:41.600 --> 0:02:45.680 Wisconsin were astonished by what they saw, which is that 0:02:45.760 --> 0:02:48.400 whenever they gave them monk the signal to start a 0:02:48.480 --> 0:02:53.240 meditation cycle, his brain immediately went into meditation mode. It 0:02:53.320 --> 0:02:57.560 was like flipping a switch. They had never seen anything 0:02:57.680 --> 0:03:00.239 like it. He was able to switch in an out 0:03:00.240 --> 0:03:03.840 of meditation mode again and again, just like that. And 0:03:04.000 --> 0:03:08.560 here's the thing that's important to understand. This monk wasn't special, 0:03:08.680 --> 0:03:11.360 no offense to him. What I mean by that was 0:03:11.400 --> 0:03:15.680 that he wasn't following some exclusive special training program. All 0:03:15.680 --> 0:03:18.640 he was doing was he was living the regular life 0:03:18.680 --> 0:03:22.920 of a monk. These same scientists, along with others, have 0:03:23.080 --> 0:03:28.000 run many exhaustive detailed studies on long time monks and 0:03:28.160 --> 0:03:31.840 other season meditators, and they all show the same types 0:03:31.840 --> 0:03:36.560 of results. An astonishing degree of mental control, whether in 0:03:36.560 --> 0:03:41.040 the form of focus, compassion, and even the brain indicators 0:03:41.400 --> 0:03:45.040 for happiness. Monks spend so much time training their minds 0:03:45.320 --> 0:03:49.160 that when challenges arise, whether it's dealing with external challenges 0:03:49.240 --> 0:03:52.840 like what we're all experiencing now or internal ones like 0:03:52.920 --> 0:03:57.160 struggling with ego, that's when their training kicks in. Like 0:03:57.440 --> 0:04:01.000 younger Mingo Rimpoche, we can learn and to monks switch 0:04:01.000 --> 0:04:05.360 our minds so that the practices we've trained automatically kick 0:04:05.440 --> 0:04:08.920 in in times of stress and struggle. Today, I'm going 0:04:08.920 --> 0:04:11.760 to share with you six ways to monks switch your 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:15.080 mind so you can feel more resilient and experience a 0:04:15.120 --> 0:04:18.880 greater sense of meaning and purpose, especially in the face 0:04:19.200 --> 0:04:24.440 of massive challenges. Now, at the monastery, monks have what 0:04:24.600 --> 0:04:28.719 is mostly a controlled, immersive environment for their training. And 0:04:28.760 --> 0:04:31.480 so you're probably thinking, but Jay, I'm not a monk, 0:04:31.640 --> 0:04:33.400 and I don't want to be a monk, So how 0:04:33.440 --> 0:04:36.480 can this apply to me? This time we're in can 0:04:36.600 --> 0:04:39.560 be your monastery or your aushroom, And in a few 0:04:39.600 --> 0:04:42.560 minutes I'll talk about some ways you can actually create 0:04:42.680 --> 0:04:46.200 more peace in your own surroundings. So, if you're ready, 0:04:46.400 --> 0:04:49.760 here we go. Now, some of you know I'm massively 0:04:49.800 --> 0:04:52.400 into movies. I would have referred to one movie. Now 0:04:52.400 --> 0:04:55.520 I'm going to bring in another. I especially love Christopher 0:04:55.560 --> 0:04:59.560 Nolan movies, and his movie Memento is one of my favorites. 0:05:00.000 --> 0:05:01.760 If you're not seeing the movie, it's about a man 0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:04.800 who has a very specific type of amnesia, a brain 0:05:04.880 --> 0:05:08.240 condition where he can no longer make new memories, and 0:05:08.320 --> 0:05:12.719 the story is told starting with the ending, then working backwards. Now, 0:05:12.760 --> 0:05:15.760 since that movie has a neuroscience theme and I'm about 0:05:15.760 --> 0:05:18.440 to delve into some neuroscience I thought I'd do it 0:05:18.560 --> 0:05:21.600 Memento style. We're going to start at the end with 0:05:21.720 --> 0:05:24.359 where you want to end up and work backwards to 0:05:24.440 --> 0:05:27.120 how you get there. For most of us, it relates 0:05:27.120 --> 0:05:31.120 to resilience. We want to feel that no matter what happens, 0:05:31.480 --> 0:05:33.839 we can handle it, that we have the tools to 0:05:33.920 --> 0:05:39.080 deal effectively with whatever life throws at us. That's our target. Now. 0:05:39.120 --> 0:05:42.320 That might be individually, and it also might be from 0:05:42.400 --> 0:05:46.080 a relationship perspective or from an organizational perspective. You're an 0:05:46.160 --> 0:05:49.880 entrepreneur or a family person, whatever type of resilience you're 0:05:49.920 --> 0:05:53.719 focused on creating. Here's the thing. In order to change 0:05:53.720 --> 0:05:57.400 your external experiences in life, you have to master your 0:05:57.480 --> 0:06:03.120 internal experiences first. There are indisputable facts about what's going 0:06:03.200 --> 0:06:06.200 on around us right now in the outside world, but 0:06:06.320 --> 0:06:10.159 on the inside, we're all experiencing it differently. Some of 0:06:10.240 --> 0:06:13.160 us are filled with fear and anxiety, while others are 0:06:13.200 --> 0:06:16.200 finding a way to navigate it with more equantimity and 0:06:16.279 --> 0:06:20.480 even make progress in their lives or their organizations or relationships. 0:06:20.520 --> 0:06:23.279 Some couples are leaning in and becoming more of a team. 0:06:23.760 --> 0:06:27.039 Some individuals are using this as a growth opportunity. Some 0:06:27.120 --> 0:06:31.200 companies are creating new service lines. Take zok Doc, an 0:06:31.200 --> 0:06:35.280 online service for booking in personal medical appointments. The company 0:06:35.320 --> 0:06:38.760 had a massive amount of a momentum coming into twenty twenty, 0:06:39.240 --> 0:06:42.080 but by the end of March, they saw bookings decline 0:06:42.240 --> 0:06:47.599 anywhere from fifty to ninety percent. Co founder Oliver Kara's 0:06:47.880 --> 0:06:51.120 was advised to layoff staff and lay low for the duration, 0:06:51.480 --> 0:06:55.320 as many companies have done, yet zok Dog did the opposite. 0:06:55.400 --> 0:06:59.159 They expanded instead of trying to weather the storm. Karas 0:06:59.279 --> 0:07:03.640 says he saw an opportunity to build windmills instead of 0:07:03.680 --> 0:07:07.160 initiating layoffs. The company tasks their staff with creating and 0:07:07.360 --> 0:07:11.720 implementing a telehealth platform so patients could get remote care 0:07:12.000 --> 0:07:15.320 from their doctors. It was a massive effort, But within 0:07:15.400 --> 0:07:19.280 two months the company had done the impossible. They pulled 0:07:19.280 --> 0:07:23.040 off a successful launch of a brand new telehealth platform that, 0:07:23.280 --> 0:07:26.960 under other circumstances, Karas says, would have taken them two 0:07:27.040 --> 0:07:31.000 years to create an introduce. One of the greatest monks 0:07:31.000 --> 0:07:35.200 which is out there is to train yourself to equate change, 0:07:35.720 --> 0:07:41.240 especially change that seems negative, with opportunity. Monk David stendel 0:07:41.320 --> 0:07:45.560 Ross talks about something he calls grateful living, which is 0:07:45.600 --> 0:07:48.560 a way of cultivating trust in life and in all 0:07:48.600 --> 0:07:52.360 that's happening in the external world, no matter how it feels. 0:07:52.920 --> 0:07:56.560 As stendel Ross says, when you receive every moment as 0:07:56.560 --> 0:08:00.440 a gift, you ask yourself, what's the opportunity in this moment? 0:08:00.960 --> 0:08:04.120 And that's exactly what zogdog dig. And that's what you 0:08:04.160 --> 0:08:07.040 can learn to do to find the opportunities that are 0:08:07.080 --> 0:08:11.120 present in these otherwise challenging moments. But I'm sure you 0:08:11.160 --> 0:08:14.240 know countless other examples of organizations and people who do 0:08:14.280 --> 0:08:19.000 in the opposite. They're struggling, and that's underscertnable. I want 0:08:19.000 --> 0:08:21.840 to acknowledge that this really isn't an exceptional time for 0:08:21.920 --> 0:08:24.840 us all and most of us are experiencing some combination 0:08:24.920 --> 0:08:30.080 of personal loss and financial loss or stress that's very real. Yet, 0:08:30.120 --> 0:08:34.000 as doctor Andrew Huberman says, part of what determines whether 0:08:34.040 --> 0:08:37.440 we struggle or find a way to thrive depends largely 0:08:37.720 --> 0:08:41.440 on how we frame stress. Hooberman is a professor in 0:08:41.480 --> 0:08:46.319 the Department of Neurobiology at Stanford University who studies, among 0:08:46.360 --> 0:08:50.199 other things, brain plasticity, or our brain's ability to learn 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:54.160 and progress. He says, perhaps the biggest determined of how 0:08:54.200 --> 0:08:57.559 we will weather storms, from the pandemic down to everyday 0:08:57.640 --> 0:09:01.840 stresses is whether we run from our fears, whether we freeze, 0:09:02.120 --> 0:09:07.040 or whether we move towards what we're afraid of. In fact, neurologically, 0:09:07.360 --> 0:09:10.920 it's only really in conditions of discomfort that we can 0:09:10.960 --> 0:09:14.760 train our brains to learn to thrive from stress and 0:09:14.840 --> 0:09:18.760 become more resilient. So we have our goal now to 0:09:18.840 --> 0:09:22.559 uncover how we get there, along with how ancient wisdom 0:09:22.640 --> 0:09:26.440 figures into the equation. Let's take a step backwards and 0:09:26.520 --> 0:09:30.880 look at some of doctor Huberman's research on neuroplasticity. It 0:09:31.120 --> 0:09:33.040 used to be that we thought that once you hit 0:09:33.120 --> 0:09:36.440 about your mid twenties, your brain couldn't change much. You 0:09:36.480 --> 0:09:38.839 can't teach an old dog or even thirty five year 0:09:38.840 --> 0:09:42.920 old new tricks right. But thankfully, modern research shows that's 0:09:43.000 --> 0:09:45.839 just not true. In fact, in some ways, we can 0:09:45.920 --> 0:09:50.560 actually become better at learning difficult things and performing at 0:09:50.559 --> 0:09:54.920 the leading edge of our ability, especially if we understand 0:09:55.320 --> 0:10:00.600 how our brains work, and fortunately, according to neuro research, 0:10:01.080 --> 0:10:04.840 there's a pretty predictable formula for it. The first part 0:10:04.840 --> 0:10:07.800 of the formula involves three things. These are the three 0:10:07.840 --> 0:10:10.200 elements you need to be able to learn to raise 0:10:10.240 --> 0:10:15.560 your level of performance. First, you need clear intention and direction. 0:10:16.400 --> 0:10:20.559 The second thing you need is intense focus, and the 0:10:20.559 --> 0:10:24.520 third thing you need is a strong motivation. The next 0:10:24.559 --> 0:10:27.080 step in the formula for learning and growth is that 0:10:27.120 --> 0:10:32.200 you need to apply direction, focus, and motivation continuously for 0:10:32.280 --> 0:10:35.200 an extended period of time. Think about it. If you 0:10:35.280 --> 0:10:38.480 lose your direction, you'll go off course. If you lose focus, 0:10:38.559 --> 0:10:43.160 you'll be ineffective, and if you lose motivation, you'll disconnect 0:10:43.320 --> 0:10:46.920 from the emotion that was acting like a propeller pushing 0:10:46.920 --> 0:10:50.880 you forward. Imagine a marathon runner during all those days 0:10:50.880 --> 0:10:54.360 and miles they log when they're training. If they lose 0:10:54.360 --> 0:10:57.960 sight of their direction, they won't train properly. If they 0:10:58.000 --> 0:11:00.920 lose sight of their focus, they can get distracted by 0:11:00.960 --> 0:11:03.600 all the other things they'd rather be doing, like hanging 0:11:03.600 --> 0:11:06.000 out with friends and eating pizza instead of running fifteen 0:11:06.040 --> 0:11:09.040 miles and the pouring rain. And if they lose their 0:11:09.080 --> 0:11:12.640 motivation when they're out on the road or the track, 0:11:13.679 --> 0:11:16.640 they won't have the heart to keep going. So you 0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:21.880 need to be invoking all three over and over again, 0:11:22.520 --> 0:11:25.760 just like that runner training day after day to run 0:11:25.800 --> 0:11:29.480 that marathon. And there's another part of the equation. The 0:11:29.640 --> 0:11:33.560 progress you make doesn't reshape your brain and create actual 0:11:33.640 --> 0:11:38.079 learning or skills. You can repeat until another element is added, 0:11:38.760 --> 0:11:42.040 and that element is periods of deep sleep or rest. 0:11:43.240 --> 0:11:47.760 So the direction, focus, motivation sustained along with deep rest. 0:11:48.760 --> 0:11:51.720 That's the formula for how we can reshape our brains. 0:11:52.040 --> 0:11:56.160 And it explains why Yonge Mingo Rimpoche showed those incredible 0:11:56.160 --> 0:12:00.480 results in Wisconsin, because that formula is essentially how a 0:12:00.559 --> 0:12:05.600 monk lives every day of their life in focused, directed, 0:12:05.800 --> 0:12:10.920 intense effort followed by periods of rest. Fortunately, as Huberman's 0:12:10.960 --> 0:12:13.880 research shows, you don't have to live like a monk 0:12:13.920 --> 0:12:17.400 to change your brain. You do, however, have to understand 0:12:17.480 --> 0:12:21.880 how to overcome some neurochemical hurdles. In that first part 0:12:21.920 --> 0:12:25.680 of the equation direction focus and motivation, your brain is 0:12:25.720 --> 0:12:29.760 releasing two main neurochemicals to assist with the performance and 0:12:29.840 --> 0:12:34.080 learning processes. Those are acetal coolin, which will help to 0:12:34.160 --> 0:12:36.800 make those actual changes to your brain when you rest, 0:12:37.200 --> 0:12:40.920 and nora adrenaline. The noor adrenaline, as you might guess 0:12:41.000 --> 0:12:44.880 from the adrenaline part, gets you amped up. Think about 0:12:44.880 --> 0:12:47.360 how you feel when you're about to compete, or about 0:12:47.360 --> 0:12:49.440 to give a presentation, or about to sit down to 0:12:49.480 --> 0:12:52.840 an intense work session. You might feel anxious, or excited 0:12:52.960 --> 0:12:56.840 or fidgety. Many of us interpret these feelings as negative, 0:12:57.280 --> 0:13:01.400 but as Huberman points out, some amount of agitation or 0:13:01.440 --> 0:13:05.160 even a feeling of frustration is normal to the process 0:13:05.240 --> 0:13:08.600 of getting ready to do something that's at the edge 0:13:08.600 --> 0:13:11.920 of your performance zone. It's what the initial stages of 0:13:12.000 --> 0:13:16.720 growth feel like. But many of us let these feelings 0:13:16.720 --> 0:13:21.120 of agitation sidetrack us. We can't get focused, we say 0:13:21.760 --> 0:13:24.679 in actuality. Part of the nora adrenalis's role is to 0:13:24.720 --> 0:13:28.040 help you get focused. So instead of allowing yourself to 0:13:28.040 --> 0:13:30.760 click over to Twitter or text a friend, you need 0:13:30.800 --> 0:13:34.040 to train yourself to just get started in a few minutes. 0:13:34.080 --> 0:13:36.880 The agitation will pass as you get into the next 0:13:36.920 --> 0:13:40.439 phase of the process, which is the sustained effort portion. 0:13:41.200 --> 0:13:44.120 So that's where that stress response comes in. When you 0:13:44.240 --> 0:13:48.360 feel that stress of agitation, that's a time to monk 0:13:48.360 --> 0:13:51.439 switch your mind. When you feel that anxiety, your hands 0:13:51.480 --> 0:13:54.720 maybe go a bit cold, or you get fidgety. Tell 0:13:54.800 --> 0:13:59.880 yourself again and again, I'm about to learn or I'm 0:14:00.080 --> 0:14:04.120 about to grow. Over time, those body signals will cue 0:14:04.120 --> 0:14:09.400 those thoughts automatically. As Stanford researcher and stress expert Kelly 0:14:09.440 --> 0:14:13.640 McGonagall says, when you choose to view your stress responses helpful, 0:14:14.480 --> 0:14:19.200 you create the biology of courage. How powerful is that? Literally, 0:14:19.240 --> 0:14:22.400 when you choose to see stress as useful. Now, remember, 0:14:22.520 --> 0:14:26.800 once we step over that stress threshold and start learning 0:14:26.920 --> 0:14:31.240 or performing. We're in our presentation or our high stakes meeting, 0:14:31.840 --> 0:14:34.640 we're working on writing our book, or we're running that marathon. 0:14:35.360 --> 0:14:38.440 We have to sustain the effort. And this is where 0:14:38.480 --> 0:14:43.840 another neurochemical you're probably familiar with, kicks in dopamine. Little 0:14:44.120 --> 0:14:48.080 hints of dopamine signal us that, as humanman says, we're 0:14:48.120 --> 0:14:53.000 on the right path, and that's what draws us forward. Otherwise, 0:14:53.000 --> 0:14:56.320 our brains would become too saturated with nora adrenaline, and 0:14:56.360 --> 0:14:58.960 eventually it would make us give up because we'd be 0:14:59.000 --> 0:15:03.920 worn out. Occasional dopamine hits actually balance the no adrenaline 0:15:04.200 --> 0:15:07.360 by giving us a chemical and emotional thumbs up, and 0:15:07.440 --> 0:15:11.000 that keeps us going. That's why marathoners will tell themselves 0:15:11.400 --> 0:15:13.600 just make it to the next water station, or to 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:16.560 the next intersection, or it's why people tell you, instead 0:15:16.600 --> 0:15:19.480 of focusing on writing an entire business plan, to chunk 0:15:19.520 --> 0:15:22.760 it down into smaller pieces and just focus on completing 0:15:22.840 --> 0:15:26.120 one at a time, then giving yourself a mental high five. 0:15:26.840 --> 0:15:30.120 Those smaller milestones give us a boost of dopamine when 0:15:30.160 --> 0:15:33.480 we achieve them. There are other ways to get dopamine 0:15:33.520 --> 0:15:37.800 hits as well. Research from Huberman's lab shows that things 0:15:37.880 --> 0:15:41.640 like laughter, a sense of group cohesiveness, a feeling of 0:15:41.720 --> 0:15:45.600 being supported, or a sense of playfulness among others, gives 0:15:45.680 --> 0:15:49.480 us that dopaman that sustains our effort. So now let's 0:15:49.520 --> 0:15:51.680 backstep again and I'll show you how a monk would 0:15:51.680 --> 0:15:55.360 approach that formula for growth, learning and resilience. The first 0:15:55.360 --> 0:15:59.360 element was a clear intentional goal. For monks, our GPS 0:15:59.440 --> 0:16:02.400 that points us in the right direction is our value system. 0:16:02.800 --> 0:16:05.360 We looked to our values to direct us. So our 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:08.960 intention or our goal would link to our values. For example, 0:16:09.040 --> 0:16:10.600 I tell a story in my book of a time 0:16:10.640 --> 0:16:13.120 when I was walking with my teacher and we came 0:16:13.120 --> 0:16:17.360 across a monk who was an incredibly accomplished scholar. I 0:16:17.440 --> 0:16:20.200 was so impressed with how many verses and passages from 0:16:20.200 --> 0:16:22.920 the ancient texts he had memorized. I turned to my 0:16:22.960 --> 0:16:26.960 teacher and said, I want to do that too, And 0:16:27.000 --> 0:16:29.440 he asked me do you want to do that because 0:16:29.440 --> 0:16:31.360 you want to be known as someone who did that 0:16:32.000 --> 0:16:34.320 or because you want to actually put in the hard 0:16:34.360 --> 0:16:37.960 work of doing it. So for monks, what we might 0:16:38.000 --> 0:16:41.880 have a goal in mind, say memorizing books or verses, 0:16:42.560 --> 0:16:44.920 we would link our goal to a deep values such 0:16:44.920 --> 0:16:48.800 as learning, rather than a surface pursuit such as ego, 0:16:49.920 --> 0:16:51.960 did you catch the monks? Suits there? It was a 0:16:52.000 --> 0:16:54.480 bit hidden the monks, which I learned to train. It 0:16:54.600 --> 0:16:58.600 was constantly asking myself why. Every time I wanted something, 0:16:58.840 --> 0:17:01.440 I would trace the why Is it because of a 0:17:01.520 --> 0:17:06.280 societal expectation or ego pursuit? Or a deep value. That 0:17:06.400 --> 0:17:10.200 three letter word is a skeleton key for unlocking your 0:17:10.280 --> 0:17:14.200 self awareness, and self awareness is at the root of 0:17:14.200 --> 0:17:18.879 self mastery. So train yourself to ask why. For a week. 0:17:19.280 --> 0:17:21.800 Every time you want something, ask yourself why, even if 0:17:21.840 --> 0:17:24.280 it's just a type of food, Where does that want 0:17:24.359 --> 0:17:27.720 come from? If you do this with regularity, you'll start 0:17:27.760 --> 0:17:30.840 to do it automatically, and the practice will help you 0:17:30.960 --> 0:17:35.679 connect with value directed goals. The second component in the 0:17:35.800 --> 0:17:39.480 learning formula is focused. How many of us have sat 0:17:39.560 --> 0:17:42.320 down at our computer with the intention of doing something 0:17:42.720 --> 0:17:45.520 We're finally going to start that course, and then five 0:17:45.600 --> 0:17:48.800 minutes later when on Instagram or texting a friend to 0:17:48.800 --> 0:17:51.560 see what they're up to. Without the ability to bring 0:17:51.600 --> 0:17:54.520 your focus fully to a task and sustain it, you 0:17:54.520 --> 0:17:58.720 will not make progress. There are several ways a monk 0:17:58.880 --> 0:18:03.760 cultivates focus, one of which is through mindfulness. You can 0:18:03.760 --> 0:18:07.679 think of mindfulness simply as noticing what is in the 0:18:07.760 --> 0:18:11.520 present moment without judgment. Here's a practice you can use 0:18:11.560 --> 0:18:15.800 to train that. Simply sit in a comfortable position, breathing 0:18:15.840 --> 0:18:21.120 in deeply and then out and in again and now, 0:18:21.160 --> 0:18:24.240 instead of trying to totally clear your mind, just notice 0:18:24.280 --> 0:18:30.080 what comes up, acknowledge it, release it, like, Okay, I 0:18:30.200 --> 0:18:35.240 notice some anxiety around work. Okay, I acknowledge you anxiety. Now, 0:18:35.280 --> 0:18:37.480 I realize you, and I bring my mind back to 0:18:37.520 --> 0:18:40.840 the present moment. If it comes back, acknowledge and release 0:18:40.880 --> 0:18:43.760 it again. There's no need to get upset at anything 0:18:43.800 --> 0:18:47.320 that arises. The goal is to not have an empty mind. 0:18:47.760 --> 0:18:51.320 It's to be where you are practicing, noticing and releasing 0:18:52.119 --> 0:18:54.679 the monks which you're training. Here is that when you 0:18:54.680 --> 0:18:58.400 sit down to start that course, when the inevitable distractions arise, 0:18:59.119 --> 0:19:03.280 you can simply notice them and release them, coming back 0:19:03.320 --> 0:19:08.399 to focus on your project. Essayist and novelist Pico Aya 0:19:08.680 --> 0:19:12.640 said in an Age of Distraction, nothing can feel more 0:19:12.720 --> 0:19:17.520 luxurious than paying attention. And I love that quote because 0:19:17.560 --> 0:19:21.280 that's the way we can hack our focus, but reframing 0:19:21.320 --> 0:19:24.240 it not as something that's hard, but as a treat, 0:19:24.640 --> 0:19:28.280 as a luxury, as he says it. Now. The third 0:19:28.320 --> 0:19:31.680 component is motivation. As I write in my book, According 0:19:31.720 --> 0:19:38.760 to a Hindu philosopher named Tucker, there are four fundamental motivations. Fear, desire, duty, 0:19:38.960 --> 0:19:42.840 and love. Everything we do sits in one of these 0:19:42.880 --> 0:19:47.399 four motivations. However, a monk would say as Tucker that 0:19:47.560 --> 0:19:50.960 fear is not sustainable over the long term. Your anxiety 0:19:51.240 --> 0:19:54.000 may motivate you now, but it's going to exhaust your 0:19:54.040 --> 0:19:57.280 body in your mind. Also, fear limits your access to 0:19:57.320 --> 0:20:01.800 creative thinking and decisive creative solutions. And when we are 0:20:01.840 --> 0:20:05.720 motivated by desire for personal gratification, we may be happy 0:20:05.800 --> 0:20:08.119 when we first get that new car or whatever it is, 0:20:08.760 --> 0:20:11.359 but we all know that feeling quickly wears off and 0:20:11.440 --> 0:20:15.880 will need more to achieve the same pleasure. However, when 0:20:15.880 --> 0:20:20.040 we're motivated by duty and love, these motivations create meaning. 0:20:20.920 --> 0:20:24.320 Love is the ultimate motivation and the ultimate why. And 0:20:24.359 --> 0:20:28.000 as American football coach Bill Walsh once said, if your 0:20:28.040 --> 0:20:31.360 why is strong enough, you will figure out how. So 0:20:31.400 --> 0:20:33.840 when you're thinking about what you want to do, you 0:20:33.880 --> 0:20:37.119 want to align your motivation with duty such as getting 0:20:37.119 --> 0:20:39.359 a better job so you can support your family, or 0:20:39.480 --> 0:20:43.320 love such as helping others, or the simple love of 0:20:43.480 --> 0:20:48.800 learning and improving. When they opted to create a telehealth platform, 0:20:49.040 --> 0:20:52.280 zoc Doc had the strongest why. Of course, the company 0:20:52.359 --> 0:20:55.760 wanted to remain profitable, but more than that, they wanted 0:20:55.800 --> 0:20:58.639 to protect their staff and their jobs. They wanted to 0:20:58.640 --> 0:21:02.040 support the medical providers who suddenly couldn't see patients in person, 0:21:02.520 --> 0:21:05.840 and they wanted to support people who are abruptly cut 0:21:05.880 --> 0:21:11.240 off from medical support during an international health crisis. When 0:21:11.640 --> 0:21:14.920 dot created their new platform, they even offered it for 0:21:15.000 --> 0:21:20.080 free to doctors who are not ZOC doc providers. See 0:21:20.119 --> 0:21:22.320 here's the single most important thing I'm going to tell 0:21:22.320 --> 0:21:27.920 you today. Service is the ultimate hack. When you tie 0:21:28.000 --> 0:21:31.120 your work or your goals to love and service of others. 0:21:31.560 --> 0:21:34.600 It's the most powerful way to game your brain to 0:21:34.800 --> 0:21:38.520 strive and grow because service not only feels good, it 0:21:38.600 --> 0:21:42.400 also boosts our self esteem and creates connection with others. 0:21:42.440 --> 0:21:46.240 And service is a self reinforcing motivation. We want to 0:21:46.320 --> 0:21:48.920 keep working and to keep serving because we get so 0:21:49.000 --> 0:21:51.520 much satisfaction from it, and so we want to keep 0:21:51.560 --> 0:21:56.680 expending that effort. Service has its own built in reward system. 0:21:57.840 --> 0:22:01.160 For monks, our lives revolved around two distinct and intense 0:22:01.200 --> 0:22:05.640 areas of focus, the self and the not self. We'd 0:22:05.680 --> 0:22:09.960 spend the first half of our days meditating, learning classes, 0:22:10.359 --> 0:22:13.760 otherwise training and mastering ourselves. The rest of the day 0:22:13.800 --> 0:22:17.080 we would spend in service of others. Service was our 0:22:17.160 --> 0:22:20.679 highest purpose for me. It still is, it motivates me deeply, 0:22:21.320 --> 0:22:24.719 So that's another monk switch. Whenever possible, figure out how 0:22:24.720 --> 0:22:28.040 to switch your work from total focus on self to service. 0:22:28.600 --> 0:22:31.520 Whether it's service or your family, your community, or your company. 0:22:31.920 --> 0:22:35.560 It will help you feel motivated, directed, energized, and like 0:22:35.680 --> 0:22:38.480 you can make a real impact even when it feels 0:22:38.520 --> 0:22:41.520 as if everything is around you is crushing down. Remember 0:22:41.600 --> 0:22:47.000 this emotion will follow action, even if at first you're 0:22:47.000 --> 0:22:49.639 feeling down and defeated, if you're not sure how you're 0:22:49.680 --> 0:22:52.040 going to move forward. If you can use these steps 0:22:52.040 --> 0:22:54.480 to just get going, just start learning, just start growing, 0:22:54.560 --> 0:22:58.600 just start serving the positive emotions, the sense of motivation, 0:22:58.600 --> 0:23:04.359 of accomplishment, of connects of satisfaction will follow. Now here's 0:23:04.359 --> 0:23:08.159 the last back step. I promise that I'd give you 0:23:08.200 --> 0:23:10.240 a monk tip on bringing some of the ushroom like 0:23:10.440 --> 0:23:13.800 peace to your everyday training grounds. You want to make 0:23:13.840 --> 0:23:17.159 your environment supportive of your development, so you want to 0:23:17.160 --> 0:23:20.080 remove or limit as much as possible the things that 0:23:20.119 --> 0:23:23.360 are putting you in an anxious, reactive straight rather than 0:23:23.400 --> 0:23:26.639 a calm, proactive state. One of the easiest ways to 0:23:26.680 --> 0:23:29.800 do this is to pay attention to the three essays. 0:23:30.240 --> 0:23:34.960 The sights sounds and smells in your environment. Let's look 0:23:35.000 --> 0:23:37.639 at what we see. How do most of us start 0:23:37.680 --> 0:23:40.280 and end our day. Not with the kiss or a 0:23:40.359 --> 0:23:43.119 kind word for a partner, or even brushing our teeth, 0:23:43.720 --> 0:23:47.800 it's checking our phones. Data from Assurian says that the 0:23:47.920 --> 0:23:51.560 average American checks their phone ninety six times a day. 0:23:51.640 --> 0:23:54.560 It's usually to check social media or our email. And 0:23:54.640 --> 0:23:58.040 how do we feel after we do that? Agitated, negative, lonely, 0:23:58.080 --> 0:24:01.520 frustrated monk train would be much more difficult if monks 0:24:01.520 --> 0:24:04.080 had smartphones, trust me. So, one thing you can do 0:24:04.160 --> 0:24:06.440 is to try and control what you see at least 0:24:06.440 --> 0:24:09.040 as much as possible, at least first thing in the morning, 0:24:09.400 --> 0:24:13.000 and that includes minimizing your interaction with your smartphone. So 0:24:13.200 --> 0:24:16.480 you maybe print a beautiful image or motivational quote that 0:24:16.600 --> 0:24:19.760 you put next to your workstation or your bedside table. 0:24:19.960 --> 0:24:22.040 You may scribble it down on a post it note. 0:24:22.640 --> 0:24:25.920 You may look outdoors. That's one of the reasons monks 0:24:25.960 --> 0:24:28.320 are so tidy and ushrooms and monasteries are typically in 0:24:28.400 --> 0:24:32.880 natural settings. We support the cultivation of internal beauty by 0:24:32.920 --> 0:24:37.800 creating and enjoying external beauty. When it comes to smells, sense, 0:24:37.880 --> 0:24:41.399 evoke emotion. In fact, they're the most powerful link to memory. 0:24:41.880 --> 0:24:44.920 That's why you remember someone's cologne or perfume, the smell 0:24:44.960 --> 0:24:47.879