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Speaker 1: treatment options at Choose Change c a dot org. She
Speaker 1: was at the top of the seesaw and I guess
Speaker 1: whoever was on the bottom got off. She came down,
Speaker 1: She hit her head, but she went through the day.
Speaker 1: She was okay. But later that afternoon she had a
Speaker 1: seizure and I noticed immediately that the right side of
Speaker 1: her face was drooping and she was talking out of
Speaker 1: the left side. That's Brian and Kathy Usher. They're talking
Speaker 1: about their daughter Beth. She had a very rare neurological encephalitis.
Speaker 1: Every minute or so she would have like either these jerks,
Speaker 1: they'd throw her to the ground, off a chair, fork
Speaker 1: would go flying, whatever was in her hand. It was,
Speaker 1: you know, not a good time. The day we left
Speaker 1: Johns Hopkins, their last words to us, um it was
Speaker 1: go home and enjoy life and let's hope she has
Speaker 1: ten good years. And then that was in seven and
Speaker 1: Beth just turned forty. Thanks Mam and Gathy. Just more
Speaker 1: keep that off the podcast. I'm Carla Wallace and this
Speaker 1: is Finding Fred, a podcast about Fred Rogers from I
Speaker 1: Heart Media and Fatherly in partnership with Transmitter Media. Today.
Speaker 1: Just one story, I really wish I could remember I
Speaker 1: was so young at the time, about Fred Rogers and
Speaker 1: a kid named Beth. I only remember through stories that
Speaker 1: Mom and Dad told me. It's slowly built up to
Speaker 1: where she was having over a hundred seizures a day,
Speaker 1: some so severe they would knock her down and she
Speaker 1: would be flailing, and we were worried she couldn't breathe.
Speaker 1: And I would go into grocery stores or church or whatever,
Speaker 1: and people would look at me and look at her
Speaker 1: because she was black and blue from head to toe
Speaker 1: from falling. We were watching this deterioration happened, and every
Speaker 1: time we went to the doctor, they had no idea
Speaker 1: what was going on. It was so crazy that we
Speaker 1: even tore apart of bedroom, thinking maybe she was bit
Speaker 1: by a spider. Maybe there was a spider in the room.
Speaker 1: You know, we were constantly calling all over the place
Speaker 1: to try to learn of new drugs, new studies being done.
Speaker 1: Didn't you doctor was checking and go into the library.
Speaker 1: I even borrowed a doctor's lab coat and broke into
Speaker 1: Yale University's medical library right because they weren't allowing anybody
Speaker 1: in there. We felt like we were on Twilight Zone
Speaker 1: because here something is obviously eating away at our child's brain.
Speaker 1: We're watching it happen. You think like you have an
Speaker 1: ill child and the world should come together and make
Speaker 1: this child better. But no one had any idea what
Speaker 1: was going on. We tried just about everything, and um
Speaker 1: in order for us to get ready for work in
Speaker 1: the morning, we had to PLoP Beth up with a
Speaker 1: bunch of pillows in front of the television set, and
Speaker 1: we instructed her older brother, he's Brian, he's older by
Speaker 1: two and a half years, to sit with her with
Speaker 1: his arms around her, and they were surrounded by pillows
Speaker 1: watching Mr. Rogers neighborhood and he called, he said, Mom,
Speaker 1: and I came running immediately, and he said Mr Rogers
Speaker 1: is over with and Beth didn't have a seizure. And
Speaker 1: then the next day the same thing happened, and the
Speaker 1: next day after that, I said, this is very peculiar.
Speaker 1: So then I sat down with her and I just
Speaker 1: looked at her, and her eyes were just she was
Speaker 1: inside that television screen, and it was like that he
Speaker 1: was talking directly to her, even so that when he
Speaker 1: would ask a question like shall we feed the fish today,
Speaker 1: Beth would say, yes, we should and at the end
Speaker 1: of every episode he would say I love you just
Speaker 1: the way you are, and Beth would say, I love
Speaker 1: you too, Mr Rogers, and she would not have one seizure.
Speaker 1: After two and a half years of research, constant seizures,
Speaker 1: and makeshift treatments, Beth and her parents finally got a
Speaker 1: diagnosis rest Mussan's encephalitis. It's an extremely rare and progressive
Speaker 1: disease that attacks the brain. The only treatment is at
Speaker 1: that time, was to remove the entire left side of
Speaker 1: her brain. You just can't fathom that type of surgery
Speaker 1: and I couldn't imagine doing that left there. So now
Speaker 1: we're not doing that. We even consulted a neurosurgeon at
Speaker 1: Yale who said that they would not even put a
Speaker 1: dog through that. And then Bethy kept getting worse, and
Speaker 1: I mean impacted her whole life, I mean her learning,
Speaker 1: her friendships. It was. It was a nightmare. We were
Speaker 1: all petrified. We didn't go anywhere. We shut down as
Speaker 1: a family. Um, we were afraid to leave her anywhere.
Speaker 1: We didn't. One of us was with our all the time,
Speaker 1: round the clock. Finally, I think what pushed us over
Speaker 1: the edge. It was a holiday show and BETHI had
Speaker 1: prepared for it and singing a song with her classmates.
Speaker 1: I think you were in what first grade at the time,
Speaker 1: and it was bomb remember that. And so the night
Speaker 1: of the show, we were there and she has a
Speaker 1: seizure right in the middle. Bow had to help her
Speaker 1: fixed seizure, and she looked at us and said, I
Speaker 1: ruined the whole thing. And she said, these seizures, I
Speaker 1: just want them to go away. So they decided to
Speaker 1: go ahead with the brain surgery known as a hemisphere ectomy,
Speaker 1: and they scheduled it for the following February. That gave
Speaker 1: them two months at home with Beth before the surgery.
Speaker 1: We knew that there was a possibility that Beth could
Speaker 1: fall into a coma, she could be paralyzed for life,
Speaker 1: and she could even die from this surgery. We wanted
Speaker 1: to make the time before her surgery spectacular. So Cathy
Speaker 1: found the number for Fred Rogers TV station and explained
Speaker 1: to his assistant that her daughter was going in for
Speaker 1: a horrendous surgery. Kathy asked for an autograph photo of
Speaker 1: Mr Rogers to tape up in the hospital room, and
Speaker 1: she said, I will, you know, talk to Fred and
Speaker 1: get back to you. And maybe an hour later, I
Speaker 1: got a call and she said, Fred is going to
Speaker 1: call Beth at seven o'clock this evening. Is that good
Speaker 1: for you? And I said he's going to call her.
Speaker 1: The phone rang and I picked it up and I
Speaker 1: said to Beth, Beth, a friend is calling for you.
Speaker 1: And at this point Beth had no friends, so thinking
Speaker 1: that a friend was on the line was really unbelievable.
Speaker 1: And she ran over and I gave her the phone
Speaker 1: and she's skwheeled. It's squilled Mr Rogers. Bummy, dad, it's
Speaker 1: Mr Rogers. Brian and I left the room. We were
Speaker 1: peeking over around the corner because she we wanted her
Speaker 1: to have this real, genuine conversation with him. Was over
Speaker 1: an hour. She was talking to each and every character
Speaker 1: on Mr Rogers and Neighborhood, and all of a sudden
Speaker 1: we heard her say, I'm afraid I'm going to die
Speaker 1: and leave my brother and my parents. And then we
Speaker 1: heard her say really, Mr Rogers, really, King Friday, and
Speaker 1: she hung up the phone saying, I love you too,
Speaker 1: Mr Rogers, thank you so much. I love you King Friday.
Speaker 1: I love you Elaine Lady, Elaine fear Child. And I
Speaker 1: love you, Daniel Strike Tiger, thank you for calling me,
Speaker 1: and I am going to be okay. And she hung
Speaker 1: up the phone and we were in a puddle. We
Speaker 1: just couldn't believe it. That February, the family made the
Speaker 1: trip to Johns Hopkins for the surgery. The operation was long,
Speaker 1: about twelve hours, and at first things for Beth looked good.
Speaker 1: The surgery went well, and then later that night she
Speaker 1: fell into a deep coma. We were killing ourselves, like,
Speaker 1: what did we do? You know, at that point we
Speaker 1: thought for sure we made the wrong decision. We were begging,
Speaker 1: praying to God, please just let her wake up from this.
Speaker 1: If she can't walk or talk, we don't care, just
Speaker 1: let her come out of it. And we did not
Speaker 1: leave her side. We were in the intensive care the
Speaker 1: entire time. Brian and Cathy said at Beth's bedside night
Speaker 1: after night for weeks, and one source of constant comfort
Speaker 1: was the music of Mr Rogers. Before her surgery, after
Speaker 1: he spoke to her on the phone, he sent her
Speaker 1: a huge box of tapes, cassette tapes, and we had
Speaker 1: this little tiny Fisher Price battery operated tape player and
Speaker 1: all around the lock we would play songs it's a
Speaker 1: beautiful day in the neighborhood down You'll never go down
Speaker 1: the drain, and we would play them over and over.
Speaker 1: When she was in a coma. One of my vivid
Speaker 1: memories is going into the intensive care unit and she
Speaker 1: was strapped up to every thing imaginable, all kinds of
Speaker 1: ivys and her head was swollen like three times the size.
Speaker 1: Her eyes were so swollen shut and you could hear
Speaker 1: the beat beat beap of the heart monitor and the
Speaker 1: dripping of all the i vs. And in the background
Speaker 1: you hear there are many ways to say I love you,
Speaker 1: Mr Rogers in the background the music that was constantly
Speaker 1: going on in the room, many ways ways more from
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Speaker 1: on track. After her brain surgery, Beth Usher fell into
Speaker 1: a deep coma. Her parents, Kathy and Brian, kept Mr.
Speaker 1: Rogers music playing in her room. One night, a nurse
Speaker 1: came into Pet's room and said, Kathy, there's a man
Speaker 1: with a voice sounding like ms to Rogers, claiming he
Speaker 1: is Fred Rogers and he'd like to speak with you.
Speaker 1: And I went to the desk and I picked it
Speaker 1: up and he said, Cathy, this is Fred, and I'm
Speaker 1: getting concerned. I wanted to find out how Beth was
Speaker 1: and I said, um, thank you so much for calling,
Speaker 1: but unfortunately there were major complications and Beth has been
Speaker 1: in a coma now for a couple of weeks. And
Speaker 1: he said, I'd like to come. I won't stay long,
Speaker 1: I promise, and UM, so we said okay. So a
Speaker 1: couple of days later and he walked with a clarinet case.
Speaker 1: He placed it on Beth's bed and he opened it
Speaker 1: slowly and took out King Friday, Lady Elaine Fairchild, Daniel
Speaker 1: Striped Tiger, and Mia Mio pussy Gat and Beth had
Speaker 1: her own neighborhood show. I just remember he was so
Speaker 1: genuinely concerned about Beth. He insisted we take pictures with
Speaker 1: the puppets and Beth he's got her feeding tube and
Speaker 1: she's hooked up the machines. And I think what touched
Speaker 1: me the most was when he sang, I love you
Speaker 1: just the way you are. It was my dad, your mom,
Speaker 1: a few of my sisters, and we were just outside
Speaker 1: the door of the room. And I remember hearing that
Speaker 1: outside the door, and I looked around at everybody, and
Speaker 1: even my dad had tears streaming down their faces, and
Speaker 1: I remember just thinking, what am I seeing here? This
Speaker 1: is incredible, and I honestly believe eaved Beth was going
Speaker 1: to wake up, that's how magical it was. And when
Speaker 1: she didn't, I'm sorry, Mom, you know um, but I
Speaker 1: remember afterwards we held hands around her bed and we prayed,
Speaker 1: and that really gave us so much comfort. I just
Speaker 1: remember feeling as though things are going to be okay.
Speaker 1: Don't don't worry. It has a happy ending. Beth Asher
Speaker 1: finally came out of her coma about three weeks later.
Speaker 1: Mr George left all of his puppets around my bed
Speaker 1: so I wouldn't wake up and be alone, so I
Speaker 1: knew he came somehow. The surgery, Um, it left her
Speaker 1: heavy please check, paralyzed on the right side, but it
Speaker 1: also took away her right field of vision in both
Speaker 1: eyes and and speaking and speaking because half of her
Speaker 1: tongue is paralyzed. I talk it goodly now, but her
Speaker 1: hearing is perfect, So it's now. Beth and Mr Rogers
Speaker 1: corresponded throughout the years. He wrote many, many letters and
Speaker 1: even called Beth her birthday. Kathy and I both worked
Speaker 1: at the University of Connecticut. Mom was put in charge
Speaker 1: of finding someone for the commencement speaking and so I suggested,
Speaker 1: why not get Mr Radgels and my mom and my
Speaker 1: dad will both nervous that college kids I won't get
Speaker 1: to listen to Mr Djels And I said, no, no,
Speaker 1: I think they'll listen. So I went ahead. I wrote
Speaker 1: him a little He got right back to me and
Speaker 1: he said he would be delighted to under one circumstance,
Speaker 1: if I help him write his commencement address. I was
Speaker 1: only twelve years joad at the time. So Mr Rogers
Speaker 1: came and Brian and I have been involved and intended
Speaker 1: a lot of graduation ceremonies, and we could never quite
Speaker 1: hear the commencement address. The champagne corks going off, the
Speaker 1: balloons and balls that are being bounced around in this ceremony,
Speaker 1: you could hear a pin drop. And during the address,
Speaker 1: he pointed to Beth in the audience and he said,
Speaker 1: these words were provided to me by my good friend
Speaker 1: Beth Usher. And what what what was the main point
Speaker 1: of your advice to him when you wrote back to him,
Speaker 1: do small kind eats for other people, then they will
Speaker 1: do small kind eatsful other people, and maybe we'll start
Speaker 1: a chain reaction. And he also did the take a
Speaker 1: moment two, think about someone who helped you along the way.
Speaker 1: Fred Rogers did this often in speeches, asked crowds to
Speaker 1: sit quietly and reflect on the people they love and
Speaker 1: the people who love them. Like in this commencement address
Speaker 1: at Dartmouth College, I'd like to give you all an
Speaker 1: invisible gift, a gift of a silent minute to think
Speaker 1: about those who have helped you become who you are today.
Speaker 1: Wherever they are, if they've loved you and encouraged you
Speaker 1: and wanted what was best in life for you, they're
Speaker 1: right inside yourself, and I feel that you deserve quiet
Speaker 1: time on this special ocasion to devote some thought to them.
Speaker 1: So let's just take a minute in honor of those
Speaker 1: who have cared about us all along the way, one
Speaker 1: silent minute. I have goose bumps now when you look
Speaker 1: around at the audiences and students and parents, you just
Speaker 1: see them like these big burly football basketball athletes with
Speaker 1: tears streaming down their eyes. Um when when they were
Speaker 1: asked to think about somebody who really helped them along
Speaker 1: the way, Whomever you've been thinking about, Imagine how grateful
Speaker 1: they must be that during your silent times you remember
Speaker 1: how important they are to you. At the end of
Speaker 1: the speech that Mr Rodgers gave the President of Yukin
Speaker 1: gave Mr Rodgers a present and it was this engraved
Speaker 1: jewelry box and he hands it to my brother O'Brien
Speaker 1: and said, keep it until we meet again. He was
Speaker 1: so aware that Beth's brother was kind of in the background,
Speaker 1: and everybody was paying so much attention to Beth, as
Speaker 1: they should. He made a point of asking him about
Speaker 1: his life, about what he enjoyed doing, and Mr Rogers
Speaker 1: paying attention to him really was huge, and he knew that.
Speaker 1: One day I came home from work. I was making dinner.
Speaker 1: I remember it profoundly. I was trying to make spaghetti
Speaker 1: and meatballs, and I was rushing around multitasking, and the
Speaker 1: phone rang and I picked it up, and he said, Kathy,
Speaker 1: is this a good time to talk? This is Fred?
Speaker 1: And I went, oh, no, Fred, this is perfect. How
Speaker 1: are you? He said, I just have a quick question.
Speaker 1: Beth and Brian seemed to have such great self esteem,
Speaker 1: and I just want to know what your philosophy is
Speaker 1: and how you go about raising your children to have
Speaker 1: such great self esteem. And I'm going on and on
Speaker 1: and in the time Brian comes home from work and
Speaker 1: he's kind of listening to my side of the conversation.
Speaker 1: And I said, okay, Fred, Oh, love to you and
Speaker 1: Joanne and and I hung up the phone and Brian
Speaker 1: said to me, who are you talking to? And I
Speaker 1: said Mr Rogers And he said you we're telling Mr
Speaker 1: Rogers about children and self esteem like and afterward I went, oh,
Speaker 1: my goodness, what did I say. I'm telling the Guru
Speaker 1: of children. Um. But that that was how he was.
Speaker 1: He didn't feel he had all the answers he was
Speaker 1: asking everybody else. Fred was always learning, always curious, always listening,
Speaker 1: and he was always there. I mean, there's so many
Speaker 1: stories about Fred showing up in surprising places, about his
Speaker 1: kindness to people that he didn't even know. Kindness in
Speaker 1: present were what Fred believed in, maybe because that's what
Speaker 1: God was for him, what goodness really meant, love and availability.
Speaker 1: So that's what he did as much as he could
Speaker 1: in person and through his show. Next time. Fred didn't
Speaker 1: call Mr Rogers Neighborhood a show, and he didn't call
Speaker 1: it a program. What he called it was a television visit.
Speaker 1: Think of what a visit is. A visit is you
Speaker 1: and me together. He was talking with us, not to us.
Speaker 1: Finding Fred is produced by Transmitter Media. This episode was
Speaker 1: produced by Jordan Bailey. Our editor is Sarah Nick's Special
Speaker 1: thanks to Michael Garofolo. The executive producer for Transmitter Media
Speaker 1: is Greta Cohne. Executive producers at Fatherly are Simon Isaacs
Speaker 1: and Andrew Berman. Thanks to the team at I Heeart Media,
Speaker 1: and thanks also to Beth Brian and Kathy Usher. Our
Speaker 1: show is mixed by Rick Kwan, music by Blue Dot
Speaker 1: Sessions and Alison Layton Brown. I'm Carver Wallace. Thank you
Speaker 1: for listening. Teething can be a real nightmare for your
Speaker 1: little ones. Highlands Naturals Baby oral pain relief tablets can
Speaker 1: help ease the pain. It's gentle, natural active ingredients like
Speaker 1: camemeo and arnica soothe your baby's mouth, and gums made
Speaker 1: with ingredients derived from plant minerals and other sources free
Speaker 1: of harsh chemicals. You can count on Highlands for serious
Speaker 1: pain relief for your teething baby. Highlands is a kinder
Speaker 1: way to care for teething. Visit Highlands dot com slide
Speaker 1: kind that's h y L A n d s dot
Speaker 1: com slash kind claims based on traditional homeopath a practice,
Speaker 1: not accept the medical evidence, not ft evaluated. Do you
Speaker 1: suffer from zoom fatigue? Otter dot ai is here to help.
Speaker 1: Use atter dot ai to get automatic meeting notes. You
Speaker 1: can even step away from the meeting and catch up
Speaker 1: any time. Get started for free at autter dot ai
Speaker 1: or download in the app stores. That's otter dot ai
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