1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:03,440 Speaker 1: There are going to be so many hurdles along the way, 2 00:00:04,120 --> 00:00:07,800 Speaker 1: and although the work may be hard, remember that it's 3 00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:10,640 Speaker 1: part of a story. It's part of your story, and 4 00:00:10,680 --> 00:00:14,480 Speaker 1: even though the end might not be exactly what you envision, 5 00:00:14,600 --> 00:00:32,440 Speaker 1: that doesn't mean that it's not beautiful. Hey, Hardler's coming 6 00:00:32,479 --> 00:00:36,760 Speaker 1: into your feed with a special throw back Thursday episode 7 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:40,640 Speaker 1: of Hurdle, and man, this one really brings it back. 8 00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:44,159 Speaker 1: I had the idea to repost my story when I 9 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:48,200 Speaker 1: was laying in my bed last Thursday night going to sleep, 10 00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:52,919 Speaker 1: and I realized that, you know, so much has happened 11 00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:56,680 Speaker 1: since Hurdle launched at the very end of twenty seventeen 12 00:00:56,800 --> 00:01:00,840 Speaker 1: beginning of twenty eighteen, and I feel now, no, I 13 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:05,520 Speaker 1: am a completely different person, And to be completely candid 14 00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:07,880 Speaker 1: with you, I thought that I would listen back to 15 00:01:07,959 --> 00:01:12,800 Speaker 1: episode one and think to myself, like, what were you thinking? 16 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:19,119 Speaker 1: But it feels strangely special and really great that I 17 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,560 Speaker 1: listened to that episode today and can say with so 18 00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:24,880 Speaker 1: much certainty that I am empowered by the way I 19 00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:28,360 Speaker 1: told my story, how I shared that and was able 20 00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:31,759 Speaker 1: to get so vulnerable right off the bat. Of course, 21 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,120 Speaker 1: there are some updated stats to share with you I 22 00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:36,240 Speaker 1: think at the time of recording that episode, I had 23 00:01:36,319 --> 00:01:37,600 Speaker 1: run five marathons. 24 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:38,679 Speaker 2: Now I'm up to eight. 25 00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:41,960 Speaker 1: I'm no longer a spin instructor, but I do now 26 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:46,000 Speaker 1: own a new specialized bike, and honestly, I'm just so 27 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:49,520 Speaker 1: grateful when I reflect about how much has happened since 28 00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:54,840 Speaker 1: episode one, since I first shared my story on the podcast, 29 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:58,760 Speaker 1: from the unbelievable guests that I've had the opportunity to 30 00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:01,920 Speaker 1: sit down with. I still remember also the first time 31 00:02:02,240 --> 00:02:05,880 Speaker 1: I recorded truly on my own, aside from that episode one, 32 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:10,320 Speaker 1: it was for the New Year's episode going into twenty nineteen, 33 00:02:10,919 --> 00:02:13,600 Speaker 1: and I remember thinking to myself, I have no idea 34 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:16,119 Speaker 1: if anyone's going to want to listen to this, if 35 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:19,120 Speaker 1: anyone's interested just to hear me talk for any. 36 00:02:18,919 --> 00:02:20,240 Speaker 2: Amount of extended time. 37 00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:23,480 Speaker 1: And I learned really quickly that what I had to 38 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:26,960 Speaker 1: say it mattered. It resonated in that I could do 39 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,960 Speaker 1: some really cool stuff if I was just willing to 40 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:33,799 Speaker 1: try new things, open up, and again get vulnerable. I 41 00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:35,800 Speaker 1: also want to touch on what I mentioned in the 42 00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:40,120 Speaker 1: episode about being overweight at two hundred and four pounds. Listen, 43 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:45,239 Speaker 1: everyone has their own feelings on body positivity, body neutrality, 44 00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:49,080 Speaker 1: body acceptance. At the time, at that weight, I was 45 00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:50,320 Speaker 1: not a happy person. 46 00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:54,000 Speaker 2: In fact, I was miserable. Everyone is different, but I. 47 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:57,320 Speaker 1: Want you to know that I recognize there are many 48 00:02:57,320 --> 00:03:01,440 Speaker 1: different stances about size and that I have respect for 49 00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:05,200 Speaker 1: the body positivity movement. And this is just my personal story. 50 00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:08,919 Speaker 1: So here we go today. I'm bringing you my story 51 00:03:09,080 --> 00:03:12,360 Speaker 1: for Throwback Thursday. As always, connect with me on social 52 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,919 Speaker 1: media at Emily Abodi at Hurdle Podcast. 53 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:16,480 Speaker 2: If you have a hurdle. 54 00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,359 Speaker 1: Moment of your own to share, or you just want 55 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:21,959 Speaker 1: to say hi, you can always reach me over on email. 56 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:26,959 Speaker 1: It's Emily at hurdle dot us. And with that, let's 57 00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:28,200 Speaker 1: get to hurdling. 58 00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:40,680 Speaker 2: Now. 59 00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:45,360 Speaker 1: Going forward, this would be the part where I introduce 60 00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: a guest, but spoiler alert, the first guest is actually me. 61 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:55,520 Speaker 1: A little background I guess first and foremost on this project. 62 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: When twenty seventeen began, I told myself there were a 63 00:03:59,880 --> 00:04:03,240 Speaker 1: few things that I wanted to do. I guess, as 64 00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:06,320 Speaker 1: resolutioners typically do at the turn of a new year. 65 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 1: Aside from really wanting to do things like get better 66 00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:15,160 Speaker 1: at spending time alone, I remember actually going to the 67 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:17,680 Speaker 1: movies by myself and being so proud that I kind 68 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:21,600 Speaker 1: of took that step last January. Aside from wanting to 69 00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:25,000 Speaker 1: take some more time alone, I also wanted to start 70 00:04:25,040 --> 00:04:28,839 Speaker 1: a podcast, and my ideas for what this would ultimately 71 00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:32,839 Speaker 1: become were a little all over the place. But when 72 00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:34,440 Speaker 1: I think about it, I really do think that some 73 00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:37,479 Speaker 1: of the best projects start out that way. It's been 74 00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:41,720 Speaker 1: a slow process, mostly because things, you know, they get 75 00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:42,160 Speaker 1: in the way. 76 00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:46,680 Speaker 2: But fast forward to about a month or two ago. 77 00:04:47,640 --> 00:04:49,320 Speaker 1: I was sitting here on my couch in New York 78 00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:52,320 Speaker 1: City venting about something to a girlfriend, and I looked 79 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:55,119 Speaker 1: at her with so much sincerity, and I just said, 80 00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:57,480 Speaker 1: I just want to get over the hurdle. 81 00:04:58,279 --> 00:04:59,680 Speaker 2: And it clicked. 82 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:03,400 Speaker 1: I started to think about all of the hurdles I've 83 00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:08,520 Speaker 1: faced and kind of just had this aha moment, even 84 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:14,080 Speaker 1: if they're tear inducing, that was ugly crying kind of things. 85 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:18,800 Speaker 1: Heartbreaking or difficult. Hurdles define us and it's hard to 86 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:21,800 Speaker 1: see in the moment, but the obstacles that come with 87 00:05:21,839 --> 00:05:25,360 Speaker 1: those they really shape our character. And so I know 88 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:28,440 Speaker 1: what's coming up. You're like, Okay, true, I'm down with this, 89 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:32,279 Speaker 1: but what's with all the wellness stuff? Well, as I mentioned, 90 00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:37,040 Speaker 1: I'm a freelance fitness editor and writer. I was last 91 00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:40,560 Speaker 1: full time at Self Magazine at the end of twenty 92 00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:42,240 Speaker 1: sixteen as their. 93 00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:44,839 Speaker 2: Fitness editor before the book closed. 94 00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:49,000 Speaker 1: And before that, I was an editor at Rodale, the 95 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:55,680 Speaker 1: publishing company that only for now owns Men's Health, Women's Health, Runners, 96 00:05:55,720 --> 00:06:01,720 Speaker 1: World Prevention, Bicycling, etc. So, as I said, a personal trainer, 97 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:05,200 Speaker 1: a run coach, and a spin instructor at Swerve Fitness 98 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:09,320 Speaker 1: here in the city. And here is a little bit 99 00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:13,880 Speaker 1: of a plot twist. I weighed two hundred and four 100 00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:18,640 Speaker 1: pounds ten years ago. So that's what's going to lead 101 00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:24,119 Speaker 1: us up to my hurdle moment, the obstacle that led 102 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:28,000 Speaker 1: me to losing seventy pounds in college. 103 00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:28,720 Speaker 2: You know, it. 104 00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:31,160 Speaker 1: Smacks me like a ton of bricks every single time 105 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:32,279 Speaker 1: I say that out loud. 106 00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:36,840 Speaker 2: So come back with me, will you? To my dorm room. 107 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:42,200 Speaker 1: In two thousand and seven, Time Flies, I was a 108 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:45,839 Speaker 1: freshman in college at the University of Connecticut, Go Huskies, 109 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:50,720 Speaker 1: and I was dramatically overweight. I grew up in a 110 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:53,679 Speaker 1: big Italian family and food was sort of the crux 111 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:57,640 Speaker 1: of everything. I loved food, and you know, I still 112 00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:00,040 Speaker 1: love food, but here's an example. I was never the 113 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:03,279 Speaker 1: kind of kid that was like, eat a quick bowl 114 00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:05,440 Speaker 1: of cereal and then Dad would drive me to school 115 00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:10,000 Speaker 1: in the morning. It was bagels all the time, everything 116 00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:18,440 Speaker 1: cream cheese, egg sandwiches all the time, extra bacon, pancakes 117 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:19,480 Speaker 1: all the time. 118 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,920 Speaker 2: Food was always an event. What's that? 119 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:25,680 Speaker 1: What's that saying? It's like I live to eat instead 120 00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:29,720 Speaker 1: of eat to live. That was one hundred percent me anyway, 121 00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:33,280 Speaker 1: Like so many people, this sort of comfort for me 122 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:36,160 Speaker 1: I found in food. And as a result, literally from 123 00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:38,920 Speaker 1: when I was a tween until this point in two 124 00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:43,960 Speaker 1: that and seven, my weight fluctuated constantly. I have photos 125 00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 1: of me at age thirteen and I'm sitting on a 126 00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 1: mini golf course and I'm probably tipping one hundred and 127 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:52,400 Speaker 1: sixty pounds, and just for the record, to this day, 128 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:54,840 Speaker 1: I stand roughly about like five three and a half. 129 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:59,080 Speaker 1: And then I have photos of me and I'm sixteen 130 00:07:59,160 --> 00:08:02,080 Speaker 1: and I'm lean, and I'm teaching dance classes four times 131 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:07,840 Speaker 1: a day. Anyway, for the purposes of this story, I 132 00:08:07,880 --> 00:08:10,960 Speaker 1: am a freshman in college, as I said, and I 133 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:14,840 Speaker 1: am two hundred and four pounds. So here we are, 134 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,320 Speaker 1: we're sitting in my dorm room, and there I am, 135 00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:19,520 Speaker 1: and I look down and I see a scale that 136 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:23,080 Speaker 1: I definitely hadn't touched since move and day, and it's 137 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:26,840 Speaker 1: under a stack of books from the previous semester. And 138 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,800 Speaker 1: just to reiterate again, it wasn't like I didn't know 139 00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:33,080 Speaker 1: that I was overweight at this time. Like I look back, 140 00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:36,839 Speaker 1: and uh, I look at all the photos I have 141 00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:39,720 Speaker 1: of myself, and they're all just selfies of me and friends, 142 00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:42,720 Speaker 1: and they're just of my face. And that's a pretty 143 00:08:42,760 --> 00:08:47,560 Speaker 1: strong indicator that I had some body issues. Because I 144 00:08:47,600 --> 00:08:51,320 Speaker 1: couldn't even stand to look at evidence of myself in 145 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:54,720 Speaker 1: this time that showed my body as its true size. 146 00:08:56,360 --> 00:09:01,400 Speaker 1: I couldn't really admit to myself that I hated my body. Hell, 147 00:09:02,040 --> 00:09:04,839 Speaker 1: that's a harsh sentence to kind of put out into 148 00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:08,319 Speaker 1: the world. Uh, you know, I was getting by without 149 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:10,280 Speaker 1: feeling like I really needed to do. 150 00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:10,959 Speaker 2: Something about it. 151 00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:15,440 Speaker 1: So I take out the scale from under my bed, 152 00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:18,040 Speaker 1: my bunk bed, and I tap it with my toe 153 00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,640 Speaker 1: and I step on it in that way that we 154 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:23,280 Speaker 1: all sort of do, where it's like if I tiptoe 155 00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:26,280 Speaker 1: toward the left side, maybe just a little bit, it'll 156 00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:30,720 Speaker 1: tell me that I'm ten pounds later, and I stared down, 157 00:09:30,840 --> 00:09:34,200 Speaker 1: and I swear those four seconds that the scale took 158 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:38,520 Speaker 1: to populate, it felt like an eternity. And when I 159 00:09:38,559 --> 00:09:40,880 Speaker 1: saw the two hundred and four pounds staring back at me, 160 00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:48,079 Speaker 1: I felt empty. I was in the state of total bewilderment, 161 00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:51,160 Speaker 1: so many questions like how did I get here? 162 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:53,280 Speaker 2: How did I get to this place? How did I 163 00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:54,720 Speaker 2: let it get this bad. 164 00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,880 Speaker 1: I get off the scale and I throw on some 165 00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:02,360 Speaker 1: old sweatpants and a hoodie and sneakers and did something 166 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:05,400 Speaker 1: that at the time was totally not instinctive to me 167 00:10:05,559 --> 00:10:09,840 Speaker 1: at all, which was run down three flights of stairs 168 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:16,920 Speaker 1: out of my dorm and sprint down this dimly lit road. 169 00:10:16,360 --> 00:10:20,079 Speaker 1: I probably go for about thirty seconds until I am 170 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:24,040 Speaker 1: totally out of breath, completely zonked, and I clapse into 171 00:10:24,120 --> 00:10:29,079 Speaker 1: the grass next to the sidewalk, just so beside myself, 172 00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:33,720 Speaker 1: absolutely hysterical, and through the tears. I remember looking up 173 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:37,480 Speaker 1: at the stars and just knowing I was so dumb 174 00:10:37,480 --> 00:10:43,400 Speaker 1: with her. In that moment, my hurtle moment, I knew 175 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:46,959 Speaker 1: I had to evaluate, I had to reevaluate, I had 176 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:49,440 Speaker 1: to take a step back and spend time on me 177 00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:53,080 Speaker 1: I knew that I was better than two hundred and 178 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:55,320 Speaker 1: four pounds. I knew that I deserved a life that 179 00:10:55,640 --> 00:11:04,240 Speaker 1: wasn't so heavy. You know, In the past five six years, 180 00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:08,520 Speaker 1: I've picked up running, which we'll get to, and I've 181 00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:12,880 Speaker 1: done multiple marathons, I've done a triathlon. As a personal trainer, 182 00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:18,679 Speaker 1: I've taken own my own personal training clients. But this 183 00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:25,240 Speaker 1: night in the grass, this was my biggest victory. That night, 184 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:30,400 Speaker 1: I decided to invest in myself. That night, the girl 185 00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:34,040 Speaker 1: who was so lost, like it just clicked. I needed 186 00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:37,280 Speaker 1: that scare, I needed that empty feeling. I needed that 187 00:11:37,360 --> 00:11:40,400 Speaker 1: reality check on the scale to reaffirm that I was 188 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:46,560 Speaker 1: worthy of my own energy. So I'm thinking that this 189 00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:49,000 Speaker 1: is the part where we talk about how I lost 190 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:53,520 Speaker 1: the weight, because it's not easy. It wasn't easy, So 191 00:11:53,559 --> 00:11:56,640 Speaker 1: I think we'll cover that a little bit here. The 192 00:11:56,679 --> 00:12:00,600 Speaker 1: first half of losing it all, which I would say 193 00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:06,520 Speaker 1: to giver take about three years, was really developing a 194 00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:11,680 Speaker 1: better relationship with food. It's embarrassing really when I say 195 00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:14,720 Speaker 1: this out loud, but I remember points growing up where 196 00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:19,880 Speaker 1: my parents would leave me at home alone and I'm 197 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:22,079 Speaker 1: like at least sixteen at this point, and I got 198 00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:25,000 Speaker 1: excited that I would have free rein over the kitchen. 199 00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:28,320 Speaker 1: I would make French fries in the oven. I would 200 00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:30,439 Speaker 1: eat ice cream out of the container. I would eat 201 00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:36,439 Speaker 1: cheddar cheese from the bag. Oh man, I remember distinctly 202 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:39,880 Speaker 1: texting one of my oldest friends, Tom Dargan, Hey, Tom, 203 00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:43,520 Speaker 1: if you're listening to this, I'm saying something along the 204 00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:46,080 Speaker 1: lines of I need to get to a point in 205 00:12:46,080 --> 00:12:47,920 Speaker 1: my life where I don't go to the fridge and 206 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:53,040 Speaker 1: eat cheddar cheese out of the bag. So these habits, 207 00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,160 Speaker 1: they were really only exacerbated once I got to college 208 00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:59,400 Speaker 1: and I had the option to eat tater tots three 209 00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:02,600 Speaker 1: meals of the day and indulge in banana chocolate chip 210 00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:06,640 Speaker 1: ice cream from the Yukon Dairy Bar, which important note 211 00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:09,120 Speaker 1: here is by far the most delicious, the best. 212 00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:11,280 Speaker 2: Ice cream in the world, if you want my opinion. 213 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:17,040 Speaker 1: So yeah, with losing weight, my relationship with food had 214 00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:21,319 Speaker 1: to change. I started to learn more about portion control, 215 00:13:21,559 --> 00:13:26,719 Speaker 1: and instead of completely eliminating foods or feeling guilty about eating. 216 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:31,160 Speaker 2: Them, I just I learned how to eat them in moderation. 217 00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:35,280 Speaker 1: I never really wanted to be on one of those 218 00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:38,120 Speaker 1: elimination diets or feel like I couldn't live my life 219 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:41,600 Speaker 1: as a twenty something college student and go out drinking 220 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:45,280 Speaker 1: from some sketchy keg or what have you. And I 221 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:49,400 Speaker 1: was lucky because there were parts that I was really 222 00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:52,600 Speaker 1: good at. You know, I loved vegetables like I adored them. 223 00:13:53,559 --> 00:13:57,160 Speaker 1: I still adore them, and I adored them almost as much. 224 00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,120 Speaker 2: As I adore banana chocolate chip ice cream. 225 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:02,920 Speaker 1: And I learned eat more of them and less tater 226 00:14:03,040 --> 00:14:05,160 Speaker 1: tots and more protein and. 227 00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:06,920 Speaker 2: More just good stuff. 228 00:14:07,840 --> 00:14:11,800 Speaker 1: And those changes paid off, because within about a year 229 00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:15,120 Speaker 1: and a half I'd lost forty pounds and was keeping 230 00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:19,920 Speaker 1: it off. And that's about the time where I started 231 00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:23,120 Speaker 1: to fall in love with running. Now to date, I 232 00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:29,720 Speaker 1: have run five marathons and done a single triathlon, and 233 00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:31,760 Speaker 1: way too many half marathons to co count. 234 00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:35,200 Speaker 2: And that run on sentence is just crazy to. 235 00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:39,440 Speaker 1: Think about, because I never thought that I could be 236 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:43,560 Speaker 1: a runner, especially because growing up my brother, who was 237 00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:46,760 Speaker 1: the track athlete of the family, with me being slightly overweight, 238 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:48,960 Speaker 1: he'd always quip at me, telling me to go run 239 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:52,600 Speaker 1: a mile whenever I was annoying him. 240 00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:55,160 Speaker 2: And now today I can't. 241 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:56,840 Speaker 1: Even tell you how many people I talked to that 242 00:14:56,920 --> 00:15:00,360 Speaker 1: want my advice on running. They want to know how 243 00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:03,960 Speaker 1: they can run, how they can become a runner. Well, 244 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,480 Speaker 1: I sucked it running. 245 00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:09,240 Speaker 2: I was the worst at it. I hated it. 246 00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:13,760 Speaker 1: And at this point, again, I had lost about forty 247 00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:18,840 Speaker 1: pounds and I was working for a summer at Camp 248 00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:22,680 Speaker 1: Laurelwood in Madison, Connecticut, and obviously at summer camp there 249 00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:26,120 Speaker 1: is no Planet fitness where you can go log forty 250 00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:31,280 Speaker 1: five minutes on an elliptical mindlessly. And I didn't want 251 00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:33,600 Speaker 1: to go back on all the progress I made. You know, 252 00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:36,200 Speaker 1: for me at that point it was not an option. 253 00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:39,520 Speaker 1: I'd worked too hard to get there, and so I 254 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:41,800 Speaker 1: knew what I had to do, and that was pick 255 00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:42,440 Speaker 1: up running. 256 00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:45,160 Speaker 2: And so every day after lunch. 257 00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:50,200 Speaker 1: I would change into some black cotton leggings from Target 258 00:15:50,640 --> 00:15:55,480 Speaker 1: and Haynes white cotton v neck and I would go 259 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:58,120 Speaker 1: run for fourteen minutes and I did the exact same 260 00:15:58,240 --> 00:16:02,840 Speaker 1: route down and back every single day. I did this 261 00:16:02,880 --> 00:16:06,000 Speaker 1: for about seven and a half weeks, and at the 262 00:16:06,080 --> 00:16:09,360 Speaker 1: end of the eight week summer session, I decided to 263 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:11,080 Speaker 1: measure it with my car, and I kind of had 264 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:14,280 Speaker 1: just assumed going into it that I was running a mile, Like, 265 00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:16,600 Speaker 1: I just figured I was slow. It was taking me 266 00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:19,960 Speaker 1: fourteen minutes, but I was doing it, and that's all 267 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,440 Speaker 1: that mattered. So I get my car and I measure it, 268 00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:25,880 Speaker 1: and at the end, I looked down and it's a 269 00:16:25,960 --> 00:16:26,680 Speaker 1: half mile. 270 00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:31,320 Speaker 2: A half mile. It took me fourteen minutes to run 271 00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:31,960 Speaker 2: a half mile. 272 00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:34,960 Speaker 1: And it's kind of funny thinking about it now, because 273 00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:40,160 Speaker 1: how I wasn't angry about that in retrospect, It's crazy. 274 00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:42,760 Speaker 2: The thing was is that I didn't even care that. 275 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:44,720 Speaker 1: It was only a half mile at the time, because, 276 00:16:45,160 --> 00:16:48,760 Speaker 1: like I said, I got to a point where I 277 00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:52,600 Speaker 1: liked running. I looked forward to that time for myself, 278 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:56,640 Speaker 1: and it didn't matter how far it had been. All 279 00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:59,360 Speaker 1: that mattered was that I was doing something for me. 280 00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:02,040 Speaker 1: I was in investing in myself. I was keeping true 281 00:17:02,080 --> 00:17:05,320 Speaker 1: to that promise that I made myself in the grass, 282 00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:08,920 Speaker 1: and that was really really special. 283 00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:10,280 Speaker 2: You know. 284 00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:14,159 Speaker 1: It's definitely something I struggle with a lot still, this 285 00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:18,200 Speaker 1: concept of self love and investing in myself. I think 286 00:17:18,520 --> 00:17:20,880 Speaker 1: a lot of people share in this notion that it's 287 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,879 Speaker 1: so easy to give to others, but it's hard to 288 00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:27,960 Speaker 1: spend time and energy and money on ourselves. 289 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:30,080 Speaker 2: As a freelance writer. 290 00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:34,520 Speaker 1: If I land some mega assignment and I'm making crazy money, 291 00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:36,919 Speaker 1: I tend to develop what I like to refer to 292 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:38,880 Speaker 1: as total Oprah syndrome. 293 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,160 Speaker 2: I become super generous. 294 00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:44,639 Speaker 1: It's like you get a sweater and you get drinks 295 00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:46,800 Speaker 1: on me, and I'm going to buy you this cactus, 296 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:48,520 Speaker 1: even if I know you're going to kill it within 297 00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:49,119 Speaker 1: two weeks. 298 00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:53,159 Speaker 2: It's just what happens. And the thing is is that 299 00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:54,440 Speaker 2: when it comes to giving back. 300 00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:59,119 Speaker 1: To me, I am so conservative, so conservative, I feel 301 00:17:59,119 --> 00:18:02,760 Speaker 1: like I don't need mine much, you know, because this 302 00:18:02,920 --> 00:18:05,720 Speaker 1: idea of giving to other people it feels so much 303 00:18:05,760 --> 00:18:12,520 Speaker 1: more rewarding than giving back to me. Still, out of 304 00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:14,720 Speaker 1: all of the lessons I learned at losing weight, which 305 00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:17,640 Speaker 1: like I said, took at least three years from start 306 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:20,639 Speaker 1: to finish, the biggest of them all was that the 307 00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:24,320 Speaker 1: people around you, if you surround yourself with the right kinds, 308 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:29,720 Speaker 1: they really want your best self. And although it might 309 00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:34,439 Speaker 1: feel a little counterintuitive, sometimes spending time on yourself is 310 00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:39,680 Speaker 1: really for the collective benefit. Good people won't be mad 311 00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:43,120 Speaker 1: at you when you need to do things for you period. 312 00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:46,679 Speaker 1: And although it may not feel like you need to 313 00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:48,879 Speaker 1: give back to yourself. You just got to do it, 314 00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:50,880 Speaker 1: and there are so many ways that you can do that. 315 00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:54,520 Speaker 1: You know, maybe you're taking a step back and you're 316 00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:59,320 Speaker 1: relaxing on a Sunday afternoon and watching HGTV until you 317 00:18:59,359 --> 00:19:02,159 Speaker 1: don't ever want to hear the word ship lap ever again. 318 00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:04,480 Speaker 2: Or maybe you. 319 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:07,359 Speaker 1: Wake up an extra hour earlier and if you like 320 00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:11,040 Speaker 1: to run, you run a few miles, or perhaps you 321 00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:14,760 Speaker 1: go on airplane mode after nine pm at night and 322 00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:16,080 Speaker 1: you just totally disconnect. 323 00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:18,720 Speaker 2: Whatever it is. You've got to do. 324 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:21,480 Speaker 1: Something, because when I take a step back and I 325 00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:24,800 Speaker 1: look at where I've come from, my whole life changed 326 00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:27,040 Speaker 1: because I decided to give back to myself. 327 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:32,440 Speaker 2: My career path too. Really, I mentioned being a freelancer 328 00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:33,000 Speaker 2: a few. 329 00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:35,800 Speaker 1: Times now, and I really just don't believe I would 330 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:38,960 Speaker 1: be as successful as I have been, or have the 331 00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:42,399 Speaker 1: grit to be my own boss or chase assignments and 332 00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:46,840 Speaker 1: deadlines and meetings and people if I didn't go through 333 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:52,080 Speaker 1: this period. It's as if getting over this hurdle instilled 334 00:19:52,080 --> 00:19:56,960 Speaker 1: in me this champion's mindset. It's like I became very 335 00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:00,320 Speaker 1: aware that as hurdles would keep coming at me, I 336 00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:05,520 Speaker 1: would have the tenacity to get over them. That's not 337 00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:07,639 Speaker 1: to say that I've got this whole thing figured out, 338 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:09,159 Speaker 1: far from it. 339 00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:09,840 Speaker 2: Far from it. 340 00:20:09,880 --> 00:20:12,800 Speaker 1: But once I believed in my inner game changer. You 341 00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:15,800 Speaker 1: know how great is that term game ginger? 342 00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:16,360 Speaker 2: I love it. 343 00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:20,720 Speaker 1: Once I believed in my inner game gender and I 344 00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:23,399 Speaker 1: believed that I was strong and capable and that I 345 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:26,840 Speaker 1: could be better, it ripped off on other things and 346 00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:31,800 Speaker 1: that's when everything changed, and more than obviously in a 347 00:20:31,840 --> 00:20:34,960 Speaker 1: physical way. Also a little note I want to throw 348 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,480 Speaker 1: in here. When you make a difficult decision, you come 349 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,200 Speaker 1: to terms with this idea that you're about to put 350 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,919 Speaker 1: in work. You know, and I truly believe the people 351 00:20:43,960 --> 00:20:47,680 Speaker 1: that say I just can't do this. They don't want 352 00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:51,000 Speaker 1: it enough, they don't want to put in the work, 353 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:57,440 Speaker 1: And man, can that be frustrating, especially if it's within 354 00:20:57,480 --> 00:21:03,879 Speaker 1: a relationship. Fact, you can't make someone want something for themselves. 355 00:21:03,920 --> 00:21:07,359 Speaker 1: But when you want something bad enough, you come to 356 00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:11,680 Speaker 1: terms with this idea that every single day going forward 357 00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:14,480 Speaker 1: may be a little bit more difficult than the last. 358 00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:18,480 Speaker 2: And it's scary, yeah, but think about the payoff. Just 359 00:21:18,560 --> 00:21:19,280 Speaker 2: think about it. 360 00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:24,320 Speaker 1: The biggest rewards in life come from moments of adversity 361 00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:28,080 Speaker 1: for things when you've worked your butt off. I once, 362 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:31,600 Speaker 1: here's a fun fact about me, ran two marathons in 363 00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:35,800 Speaker 1: one week. It's crazy, I know, and in hindsight, it 364 00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:41,480 Speaker 1: was absolutely insane and involved so much opportunity, cost abundant 365 00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:45,800 Speaker 1: amounts of training. I had to skip over dinners with friends, 366 00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:50,040 Speaker 1: I had to get up early as all hell and 367 00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:54,959 Speaker 1: run twenty xs miles starting at five fifteen am. 368 00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:57,160 Speaker 2: It was a lot. 369 00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:02,240 Speaker 1: But the reward of that, the reward of those experiences together, 370 00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:06,280 Speaker 1: one day, you know, I'll be able to tell my 371 00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:09,480 Speaker 1: kids that I did this, and they're going to think 372 00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:13,199 Speaker 1: their mom is a total badass. And that's the nugget. 373 00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:15,199 Speaker 1: And granted, you know, the nugget isn't always going to 374 00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:18,119 Speaker 1: be two marathons in week one week, But you just 375 00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:21,159 Speaker 1: think about the things you really want and how great 376 00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:23,640 Speaker 1: you feel at the end of them when you realize 377 00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:27,239 Speaker 1: that you were capable. You were capable all along, and 378 00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:33,520 Speaker 1: that's the good stuff, that's the magic. So what do 379 00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:36,439 Speaker 1: I want you to take away from my story, Well, 380 00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:41,400 Speaker 1: really hopefully that anything is possible if you believe it's possible. 381 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:42,240 Speaker 2: Period. 382 00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:46,879 Speaker 1: You are the one who decides where you're at mentally, physically. 383 00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:51,399 Speaker 1: It's so important to invest in yourself. There are going 384 00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:55,320 Speaker 1: to be so many hurdles along the way, and although 385 00:22:55,359 --> 00:22:59,000 Speaker 1: the work may be hard, remember that it's part of 386 00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:01,760 Speaker 1: a story. It's part of your story. And even though 387 00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:05,280 Speaker 1: the end might not be exactly what you envision, that 388 00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:08,800 Speaker 1: doesn't mean that it's not beautiful. It doesn't mean that 389 00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:11,720 Speaker 1: you didn't work hard to get there. And whether or 390 00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:17,240 Speaker 1: not you believe it yet, you too. Yeah, you you're 391 00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:22,360 Speaker 1: a game changer. You are I think I think it's 392 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:25,879 Speaker 1: about time to cut it. If you're still listening, thank you. 393 00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:30,640 Speaker 1: I appreciate you. I can't even stress how much work 394 00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:33,720 Speaker 1: has gone into this project already and you're only listening 395 00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:38,520 Speaker 1: to episode one. It's still in its infancy, from doing 396 00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:42,920 Speaker 1: things like learning how to build a squarespace and host content, 397 00:23:43,359 --> 00:23:46,720 Speaker 1: and finagling the best way to host these from my 398 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:50,800 Speaker 1: we work space, which has been the ultimate saving grace 399 00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:54,600 Speaker 1: as a freelancer, getting me outside of my apartment and 400 00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:57,800 Speaker 1: providing me with enough freshly brewed coffee to fuel my 401 00:23:57,880 --> 00:24:03,679 Speaker 1: never ending thoughts. You know, the work feels endless, and 402 00:24:03,720 --> 00:24:06,320 Speaker 1: I also, of note, wouldn't be able to do any 403 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:08,760 Speaker 1: of this without the support of my family and friends. 404 00:24:09,640 --> 00:24:13,159 Speaker 1: A holler to my friend my Corn for my beautiful music. 405 00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:17,840 Speaker 1: Please take a moment to leave a quick review by 406 00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:21,399 Speaker 1: clicking the link with the description to this episode. Like 407 00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:24,840 Speaker 1: I said, we all face multiple hurdles in life, and 408 00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:27,560 Speaker 1: I want to hear about yours. Reach Out to me 409 00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:32,120 Speaker 1: at Emily at hurdle dot us, connect with the podcast 410 00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:35,600 Speaker 1: on Instagram and Twitter at Hurdle Podcast, and again, of 411 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:39,280 Speaker 1: course feel free to connect with me to over at 412 00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:44,440 Speaker 1: Emily A body, A B B A T E. And 413 00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:50,200 Speaker 1: with that the first of many hurdles conquered until next time.