1 00:00:00,920 --> 00:00:04,400 Speaker 1: Wow, welcome back, Welcome back. How does it feel to 2 00:00:04,440 --> 00:00:08,280 Speaker 1: be back in the States. It feels great. What a 3 00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:11,600 Speaker 1: weird week last week was? You know, it was just 4 00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:17,120 Speaker 1: such a like emotionally volatile week for me. How did 5 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:19,200 Speaker 1: you How did you feel? Were you up and down 6 00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:23,919 Speaker 1: at all? Um? Yeah, I mean I tried to sort of, um, 7 00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:27,680 Speaker 1: run away from it. I mean it was it was 8 00:00:27,720 --> 00:00:30,159 Speaker 1: fairly easy to do because I wasn't tied to my 9 00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:33,559 Speaker 1: phone service is really terrible where I was, UM And 10 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:35,960 Speaker 1: in fact, I was at the airport in Camcoon on 11 00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:40,720 Speaker 1: my way back when it was called and UM, so 12 00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:42,479 Speaker 1: that was pretty exciting to know that I was like 13 00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:47,320 Speaker 1: coming back to um personal elation. You know, like not 14 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:49,919 Speaker 1: everybody was happy with the news, but I personally was. 15 00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:56,400 Speaker 1: UM and UM yeah. I mean it's just overall there's 16 00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 1: still like this fog of sadness for me because you know, 17 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:01,840 Speaker 1: I do think that the election revealed that there's a 18 00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:04,319 Speaker 1: lot of people in this country that I really disagree 19 00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:07,560 Speaker 1: with and um, and that makes me sad because for me, 20 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:09,800 Speaker 1: it's not even political anymore. It's just about like a 21 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:14,480 Speaker 1: human to human sort of thing. And you know, obviously 22 00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:16,520 Speaker 1: I can't you can't look at the number of votes 23 00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:19,080 Speaker 1: and be like, well, all of these people voted for 24 00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:22,960 Speaker 1: him for bad reasons. Um, but it just it does 25 00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:25,480 Speaker 1: make me sad, Like I was kind of really hoping 26 00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:27,440 Speaker 1: that it would just be this like the landslide thing 27 00:01:27,560 --> 00:01:31,760 Speaker 1: that didn't turn out to be. UM. So now it's 28 00:01:31,760 --> 00:01:35,040 Speaker 1: just like we all have to just you know, both sides, 29 00:01:35,080 --> 00:01:37,000 Speaker 1: we have to figure out our path forward and it 30 00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:43,320 Speaker 1: cannot like it just I hope that my hope is 31 00:01:43,360 --> 00:01:47,560 Speaker 1: that like we're not being driven by divisiveness like that 32 00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:50,240 Speaker 1: there is and I don't it's not as easy as 33 00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:52,920 Speaker 1: being like, Okay, now you guys, let's unite. I just 34 00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:55,760 Speaker 1: don't think that's gonna work. But UM, I do think 35 00:01:55,800 --> 00:02:01,520 Speaker 1: that if like we're being led by unity, then maybe, um, 36 00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:04,960 Speaker 1: some of this damage can be repaired. Yeah. I think 37 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:08,040 Speaker 1: that's an overall thing that everyone could say, no matter 38 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:13,000 Speaker 1: who you voted for, the divided nature of our country 39 00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:17,440 Speaker 1: this past year has been hard on everybody from every side. 40 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:22,160 Speaker 1: So I'm hopeful to that whatever um happens in the 41 00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,239 Speaker 1: next couple of months and then over the next couple 42 00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:26,280 Speaker 1: of years, is that we can just all unite back 43 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:30,200 Speaker 1: into a really amazing democracy. I also just hope that 44 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:38,519 Speaker 1: UM politics UM doesn't remain like the number one form 45 00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:40,880 Speaker 1: of entertainment for our country. This is not a reality 46 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:44,320 Speaker 1: show like I watched. I watched so much stuff last 47 00:02:44,320 --> 00:02:46,399 Speaker 1: week that I was like, is this in real life? 48 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:52,240 Speaker 1: Like what happening? Everything was about drop and the election, 49 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:54,040 Speaker 1: and like they'll run up to the election and the 50 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:57,919 Speaker 1: election and it still is. It's still all about how 51 00:02:58,000 --> 00:03:01,000 Speaker 1: they're interacting now and all of that stuff. I hope 52 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:04,400 Speaker 1: that once the transition happens, that like politics isn't just 53 00:03:04,440 --> 00:03:08,239 Speaker 1: the only thing the news is covering UM because you're 54 00:03:08,320 --> 00:03:11,919 Speaker 1: waking up in like it's more back to normal politics. 55 00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:16,560 Speaker 1: And I mean this kind of leads into the topic 56 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:18,920 Speaker 1: we were going to talk about these topics flip flop, 57 00:03:18,960 --> 00:03:21,040 Speaker 1: but we'll just switch it up because we're sort of 58 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:25,440 Speaker 1: going into it. But it is overwhelming how big of 59 00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:27,360 Speaker 1: a deal this has been on the news in our 60 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,640 Speaker 1: just it's everywhere you look. It's everywhere you go and 61 00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:33,400 Speaker 1: you're talking to people, are you're standing at the water cooler, 62 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:35,000 Speaker 1: which I guess a lot of people aren't doing anymore 63 00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:39,000 Speaker 1: because of COVID, But like it's just so much this year. 64 00:03:39,080 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: And I asked yesterday on my Instagram how that's affected 65 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:46,760 Speaker 1: people relationship wise, and like I was thinking, also, how 66 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:51,080 Speaker 1: are people's sex drives right now? Because politics and all 67 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:55,200 Speaker 1: of this like divisiveness, like you said, is just completely 68 00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:59,040 Speaker 1: emotionally overwhelming for me at least it has been. Yeah, 69 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:02,040 Speaker 1: what was your initial thought me on that question? I 70 00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:07,480 Speaker 1: mean I would think that, Um. I mean personally, I 71 00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:10,200 Speaker 1: haven't been like interested in dating. I don't know if 72 00:04:10,240 --> 00:04:13,480 Speaker 1: it's a result of politics though, but just trying to 73 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:17,920 Speaker 1: answer that question from my perspective, maybe it has been 74 00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:21,840 Speaker 1: like maybe the way that I've been feeling. And it's 75 00:04:21,880 --> 00:04:24,839 Speaker 1: funny because when I was in Mexico, I did have 76 00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:29,080 Speaker 1: this amazing massage and it's supposed to unlock you, and 77 00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:32,240 Speaker 1: that night I was like at the restaurant we were 78 00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:34,400 Speaker 1: like having dinner, and the people that I were like, 79 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:37,119 Speaker 1: oh my god, you are unlocked, Like this is where 80 00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:40,240 Speaker 1: have you been? I was like turn ready to go, 81 00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:49,600 Speaker 1: like hitting on the waiter like that's just favorite pickup 82 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:51,240 Speaker 1: one and you see is a cute guy. Where'd you 83 00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 1: get those muscles? Um? But um, But now that I'm 84 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,560 Speaker 1: thinking about, I'm wondering if it was the massage or 85 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:01,040 Speaker 1: the fact that I had stepped away from this yea, 86 00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:04,280 Speaker 1: like the heaviness of what life has been for the 87 00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:08,720 Speaker 1: last several years. Um, so maybe it has had an 88 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:12,280 Speaker 1: impact on me, um, because there has been like a 89 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:18,360 Speaker 1: hopelessness um and um, you know, I'm just hoping that 90 00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:21,599 Speaker 1: that cloud of hopelessness will be lifted and I'll feel 91 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,600 Speaker 1: better about myself and everyone feel great about themselves and 92 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,560 Speaker 1: maybe there's more sex in my future. Sure, because it's 93 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:31,280 Speaker 1: so confusing to me, like what is actually the culprit 94 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:35,719 Speaker 1: of my heaviness, because there's so much stuff, like it's 95 00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:38,040 Speaker 1: literally been back to back in the second, you get 96 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:41,800 Speaker 1: a sense of relief. It's like like actually over the 97 00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:45,120 Speaker 1: weekend as I felt relief because like we had an answer. 98 00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:48,080 Speaker 1: Last week was so terrible, the back and forth, the 99 00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:50,159 Speaker 1: back and forth like that was so joining to me. 100 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:52,840 Speaker 1: I remember going to a workout class and with this 101 00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:54,520 Speaker 1: is with one of our friends. Are probably gonna get 102 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:57,039 Speaker 1: annihilated now that I said that, But I wore a mask, 103 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:01,440 Speaker 1: by the way. Um, but I went to this class 104 00:06:01,480 --> 00:06:03,160 Speaker 1: and a friend of ours was there with me, and 105 00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:06,919 Speaker 1: he is not emotional ever, Like I've never seen him cry. 106 00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:10,040 Speaker 1: He barely ever cries in his life. And I literally 107 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:11,920 Speaker 1: looked at him at one point and he was like 108 00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:15,320 Speaker 1: teared up, and I'm like, what what is happening? He 109 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:17,560 Speaker 1: was so drained because it's just like you're checking your 110 00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:21,200 Speaker 1: phone constantly. You're like in the midst of this argument 111 00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:23,200 Speaker 1: back and forth and back and forth, and it's just 112 00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:26,880 Speaker 1: so heavy and it's so defeating to me. Like it 113 00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:30,839 Speaker 1: was just so emotionally draining. And so I know for 114 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:35,320 Speaker 1: me personally last week, I was not interested in sex. 115 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:37,200 Speaker 1: Like I was just like I just want to go 116 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,080 Speaker 1: get in my bed and cry. Yeah. I mean I 117 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:41,040 Speaker 1: feel like you could go one of the two extremes. 118 00:06:41,320 --> 00:06:43,480 Speaker 1: You could also just like throw caution to the wind 119 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:48,040 Speaker 1: and like, um, you know, approach sex with like reckless 120 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:52,560 Speaker 1: abandoned because of hopelessness. You know, there's nothing left to 121 00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:57,640 Speaker 1: lose kind of mentality. I um yeah, I mean I 122 00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:05,279 Speaker 1: think to just emotionally like relationships whilese, like even friends 123 00:07:05,279 --> 00:07:09,720 Speaker 1: and family, it's like no one wants to think that 124 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:12,880 Speaker 1: they're wrong, you know, in these situations, and everybody has 125 00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:17,680 Speaker 1: their reason why, and it's I it's I don't know 126 00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:21,440 Speaker 1: that it's um, it's not often not my place to 127 00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:24,160 Speaker 1: feel like I need to change people either. Like so 128 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:26,480 Speaker 1: it's like, how then do you reconcile it within your 129 00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:29,560 Speaker 1: own life? Well, I can't imagine if you were dating 130 00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:32,800 Speaker 1: or married to a person who believed in the other 131 00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:36,440 Speaker 1: candidates this year, how the funk do you survive that? 132 00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:40,160 Speaker 1: I mean, I I had told myself because I was 133 00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,840 Speaker 1: really upset that I found out that my all of 134 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:47,360 Speaker 1: my family were voting opposite of me, and I said, 135 00:07:48,080 --> 00:07:50,520 Speaker 1: fuck it. If Trump wins, I'm not going to go 136 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:54,400 Speaker 1: home for Christmas or Thanksgiving a bad home for Thanksgiving 137 00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:58,360 Speaker 1: and stay the whole time. But you know, it's I 138 00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:01,080 Speaker 1: started thinking about just like my own path to where 139 00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:03,400 Speaker 1: I am today, and I was like, wait a minute. 140 00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:05,400 Speaker 1: I was the one that, for twenty five years of 141 00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:08,320 Speaker 1: my life, like I had to hold a secret because 142 00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:10,640 Speaker 1: I was scared that somebody was my family isn't gonna 143 00:08:10,680 --> 00:08:13,400 Speaker 1: love me. And now for the last twenty years of 144 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:16,200 Speaker 1: my life, I've you know, I'm the one that has 145 00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:19,440 Speaker 1: to suck it up, and just like here some terrible 146 00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:22,720 Speaker 1: things that sometimes people from my hometown say when I'm home, 147 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 1: and like, you know, don't I know it's an argument 148 00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:29,320 Speaker 1: I'm not going to win there, And I'm like, you know, 149 00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:30,840 Speaker 1: what I'm tired of me and the one that has 150 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:33,240 Speaker 1: to suck it up and the one that has the consequences. 151 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:37,560 Speaker 1: So there you go, Like, if this goes the way 152 00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,600 Speaker 1: that I'm that, I'm not going to feel good about 153 00:08:39,640 --> 00:08:42,760 Speaker 1: being at home. The consequences are there's I'm just gonna 154 00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:46,520 Speaker 1: stay here for Christmas. Um, And thankfully I get I 155 00:08:46,559 --> 00:08:50,280 Speaker 1: do get to go see my family. Um, And you know, 156 00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:53,520 Speaker 1: I'm I'm hoping that politics isn't a huge part of 157 00:08:53,559 --> 00:08:56,920 Speaker 1: the conversation, but I'm sure it will come up. Um, 158 00:08:56,920 --> 00:08:58,520 Speaker 1: But at least I can lay my head down at 159 00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:00,920 Speaker 1: night and know that it's changing and that the right 160 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:02,520 Speaker 1: person is going to be the White House for me. 161 00:09:02,840 --> 00:09:05,440 Speaker 1: For you, Yeah, I mean I think like you said earlier, 162 00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:08,640 Speaker 1: it's so interesting because I have never been the person 163 00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:11,640 Speaker 1: like you know, my family has voted separate or you know, 164 00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:14,959 Speaker 1: like not my immediate family, but my bigger family has 165 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:17,079 Speaker 1: voted differently than I have in the past. We just 166 00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:19,080 Speaker 1: don't talk about it, or like I've had friends who 167 00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:21,800 Speaker 1: vote differently, we just don't talk about it. This year, 168 00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:24,760 Speaker 1: everything felt so much more personal and like so much 169 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:28,800 Speaker 1: more Um. What's the word where you just feel so 170 00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:32,440 Speaker 1: convicted about your side, and I think both sides felt that, 171 00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:35,600 Speaker 1: and so it was very divided. And anyway, we got 172 00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:38,120 Speaker 1: a lot of messages back from these people, and it's 173 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:39,880 Speaker 1: sort of what you were saying that there's two ways 174 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:42,200 Speaker 1: that it could go. It was either there were some 175 00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:45,280 Speaker 1: people like this girl this this girl's name is Cinnamon. 176 00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:50,520 Speaker 1: So um, yeah it is spicy. She said, Oh girl, 177 00:09:50,559 --> 00:09:52,920 Speaker 1: it helps. It helps me just forget about all the 178 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:55,520 Speaker 1: bullshit and I can just focus on what makes me happy, 179 00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,920 Speaker 1: which is sex. And that actually I was like, you 180 00:09:57,920 --> 00:10:00,520 Speaker 1: know what, that's right, Like maybe if you are in 181 00:10:00,520 --> 00:10:03,800 Speaker 1: the same place as your partner and you're like, okay, 182 00:10:04,280 --> 00:10:07,120 Speaker 1: sex makes me happy, let me just turn the fucking 183 00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:09,760 Speaker 1: news off for a second in zone out and let's 184 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:12,320 Speaker 1: like love on each other. That actually well, and if 185 00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:15,560 Speaker 1: you're if you see eye to eye politically, then it's 186 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:20,600 Speaker 1: like you like, then sex is like an amazing connector 187 00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:23,600 Speaker 1: that's true. That's a great point. At least then feel 188 00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:26,120 Speaker 1: like you're going onto the battlefield, which is life at 189 00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:29,840 Speaker 1: this point with like a soldier standing next to you, 190 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:33,760 Speaker 1: you know. I mean, that's such a serious analogy. Is 191 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,000 Speaker 1: that a song too? I was just thinking life as 192 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:39,960 Speaker 1: a battlefield, like that sounds love. Love is a battlefil 193 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:44,319 Speaker 1: I knew that was something life is a battlefield. What 194 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:45,640 Speaker 1: I was gonna say earlier and I sort of got 195 00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:48,480 Speaker 1: side checked, was like, literally, what is it that is 196 00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:51,200 Speaker 1: emotionally joining to you this week? You just don't know 197 00:10:51,280 --> 00:10:53,920 Speaker 1: because it's one thing after another. I mean, last week 198 00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:55,600 Speaker 1: was the election. This week, I'm trying to go back 199 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:57,800 Speaker 1: to work. We have the CMAS here in Nashville, and 200 00:10:57,840 --> 00:11:02,240 Speaker 1: it's been hardcore with this CODA shit. People are dropping 201 00:11:02,360 --> 00:11:07,800 Speaker 1: like flies. And I know, are we allowed to say 202 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:12,240 Speaker 1: that out loud? It was earlier one? Okay, Yeah, there's 203 00:11:12,240 --> 00:11:13,840 Speaker 1: been a there's been a lot of artists we've had 204 00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:18,120 Speaker 1: to drop out. Luckily my artists are okay, but we've 205 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:20,360 Speaker 1: had to be super careful. We all had to get 206 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:23,920 Speaker 1: tested multiple times. You have to wear a mask shield 207 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,079 Speaker 1: and all of that is heavy to Like, I just 208 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:27,640 Speaker 1: want to be able to go in and do my job, 209 00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:29,280 Speaker 1: you know, And I know that sounds so whiny, but 210 00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:31,720 Speaker 1: I'm just like, you want to go in and know 211 00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:34,520 Speaker 1: the program he has, Like that's why we're good at 212 00:11:34,559 --> 00:11:36,360 Speaker 1: our jobs. We've been doing him for so many years, 213 00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:38,920 Speaker 1: and like I know the deal. Know what to expect, 214 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:41,080 Speaker 1: know how to do it, and this year, all of 215 00:11:41,080 --> 00:11:43,120 Speaker 1: that's gone out the window. I thought it was funny 216 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:46,120 Speaker 1: when we're sidetracking a little bit, but Very Hilliard posted 217 00:11:46,160 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 1: a photo last night and I had to click on 218 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:52,760 Speaker 1: who was who because we all had this shields on Dirks. 219 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:56,360 Speaker 1: Dirks took a picture of our whole team, and he's 220 00:11:56,400 --> 00:11:58,160 Speaker 1: obviously the only one not in a mask because he 221 00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:00,400 Speaker 1: was performing, and he was like, I'm sitting there like 222 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:02,560 Speaker 1: powdering him, touching him up, and he like looked at 223 00:12:02,559 --> 00:12:04,720 Speaker 1: me and just started laughing. He's like, this is so weird. 224 00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:08,200 Speaker 1: You look like a robot, Like what is life right now? 225 00:12:08,679 --> 00:12:11,160 Speaker 1: So then we all took a picture. Um, I'll post 226 00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:13,640 Speaker 1: her later actually, but it's yeah, it's just such a 227 00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:15,720 Speaker 1: weird year. And that was coming on the heels of 228 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:18,160 Speaker 1: the election stuff, so I was already like this weekend 229 00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:20,160 Speaker 1: I kind of like fired back up, you know. I 230 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:23,800 Speaker 1: remember talking about boyfriend being like all right, like one 231 00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:26,600 Speaker 1: thing down, we got to just keep going through, like 232 00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:28,840 Speaker 1: we're almost to the end of and then I just 233 00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:32,200 Speaker 1: got my ass kicked again this week and it's just 234 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:35,040 Speaker 1: like here we go again. You know. It's it's also 235 00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:37,120 Speaker 1: the end of the year, and I think that I 236 00:12:37,160 --> 00:12:39,560 Speaker 1: think it's typical. That's like, it doesn't even feel like 237 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:42,760 Speaker 1: it's been a year. I'm so confused. Well, and it's 238 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:44,520 Speaker 1: not like we're all going to be able to like 239 00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:50,160 Speaker 1: really sort of like celebrate the holidays. And I think 240 00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:52,640 Speaker 1: there's probably some stress there. That's I think so too. 241 00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:56,680 Speaker 1: I just want I'm craving normalcy, and part of normalcy 242 00:12:56,760 --> 00:13:01,480 Speaker 1: is sex. I think, um, if you're lucky, but sex 243 00:13:01,559 --> 00:13:05,559 Speaker 1: with yourself. Okay, um, okay, let's read some more messages. 244 00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:08,200 Speaker 1: We totally have side checked. I think I hope that 245 00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:11,520 Speaker 1: a lot of you guys are not feeling what we're feeling, 246 00:13:11,520 --> 00:13:14,319 Speaker 1: but I assume most people are. I think this overwhelmed 247 00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:18,400 Speaker 1: is pretty consistent across the board from everyone I talked to. Um, 248 00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,480 Speaker 1: so just know that we're all in this together, and 249 00:13:20,559 --> 00:13:22,320 Speaker 1: let's figure out some ways to make this a little 250 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:25,400 Speaker 1: bit easier. But this is from Tiana, and she said 251 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:28,400 Speaker 1: it helped after it was over. This is about the 252 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:31,080 Speaker 1: election again. My anxiety was through the roof while they 253 00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:32,959 Speaker 1: were counting the votes, which made it super hard to 254 00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 1: want to do anything sexual at all. That's how I 255 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:37,360 Speaker 1: felt like I was just like in complete overwhelmed. I 256 00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:39,560 Speaker 1: was like crying on certain nights because I was so 257 00:13:39,679 --> 00:13:46,000 Speaker 1: overwhelmed with emotion. And to me, I feel the divide 258 00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:48,880 Speaker 1: like I just feel it like I'm an impact. I 259 00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:51,240 Speaker 1: pick up on energy everywhere, and it's just like even 260 00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:53,400 Speaker 1: when you're going to the grocery store, you feel it 261 00:13:53,520 --> 00:13:55,360 Speaker 1: right now, like and it's just too much for me, 262 00:13:55,440 --> 00:13:58,800 Speaker 1: Like I need us to be Americans again, that that 263 00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:02,280 Speaker 1: staying bite other and maybe that's going to look completely 264 00:14:02,320 --> 00:14:04,640 Speaker 1: different too, because and it needs to, you know, like 265 00:14:04,679 --> 00:14:07,320 Speaker 1: I don't know that we've stood as much together as 266 00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:12,240 Speaker 1: maybe I thought we were, but very openly, we're not 267 00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:15,480 Speaker 1: together right now, and so I'm really hoping that we 268 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,600 Speaker 1: can get back to that because of the emotional overwhelmed. 269 00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:21,840 Speaker 1: This is from Sarah. She said, it hurt my relationship. 270 00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:24,280 Speaker 1: I'm so so emotionally exhausted to a point I have 271 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:26,960 Speaker 1: never been before. That's how a lot of us feel. 272 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:30,400 Speaker 1: From Kirby, she said, it definitely hurt. Ha ha, this 273 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:35,800 Speaker 1: was so stressful. Yeah. Um, this one says for Jennifer. 274 00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:38,800 Speaker 1: It helped. My husband is very politically informed and loves 275 00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:42,080 Speaker 1: when I talk politics, so that's like their little apphrodisiac there, 276 00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:46,480 Speaker 1: especially since we were nine on the same page of 277 00:14:46,520 --> 00:14:50,440 Speaker 1: our political views. See that's where you're like you said, 278 00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:54,320 Speaker 1: it's connecting. But could you imagine in a like in 279 00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:57,000 Speaker 1: a country that feels divided right now, if your household 280 00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,040 Speaker 1: was also divided. Yeah, I mean, I don't know if 281 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,640 Speaker 1: you've got any message is about that, but I would 282 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:04,760 Speaker 1: be curious if anybody listens, and any listeners out there, 283 00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:09,360 Speaker 1: like if your household is divided, what that was doing 284 00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:13,400 Speaker 1: for your sex and just like your relationship in general. Yeah, 285 00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:16,040 Speaker 1: there were there were a couple. I'm looking for one, 286 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:18,480 Speaker 1: but oh, here it is. I would say it hurt, 287 00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:21,000 Speaker 1: but only temporarily because I'm a trumper and the boyfriend 288 00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:23,480 Speaker 1: is a bidener. Only hurt us for a week or so. 289 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,520 Speaker 1: Though that's good they could let it go that fast, 290 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:28,440 Speaker 1: because I know we've had some people in our friend 291 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,280 Speaker 1: group even who have really struggled with this like different 292 00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:34,880 Speaker 1: opinion situation because it feels so opposite into the scale, 293 00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:37,120 Speaker 1: like there's no middle ground this year, you know, like 294 00:15:37,160 --> 00:15:39,360 Speaker 1: they're usually can be like, Okay, I can give you 295 00:15:39,400 --> 00:15:41,480 Speaker 1: that one because I think this and y'all can like 296 00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:43,920 Speaker 1: meet somewhere in the middle. It doesn't feel like that 297 00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:46,600 Speaker 1: at all, right now, I guess unless you're like hate 298 00:15:46,600 --> 00:15:52,720 Speaker 1: fucking all the time, right, which can be fun. Okay, 299 00:15:52,880 --> 00:15:55,520 Speaker 1: So then this said, Oh my gosh, it's freaking killing 300 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:57,760 Speaker 1: my game. I'm fifty three. The majority of men I 301 00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:04,440 Speaker 1: meet our supporters. Look, this is not my opinion. I'm 302 00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:07,720 Speaker 1: just reading messages just for anyone who's about to be bitchy, 303 00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:09,640 Speaker 1: But it says the majority of men I meet our 304 00:16:09,680 --> 00:16:15,680 Speaker 1: supporters supporters of the Dorrito in chief. They were angry before, 305 00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:20,000 Speaker 1: now they are sad. Okay, I don't know why that 306 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:23,360 Speaker 1: showed me is so funny. Um, I've always heard him 307 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:26,320 Speaker 1: called the cheeto, not the Dorito. Oh, such it up 308 00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:29,280 Speaker 1: for you helped? This one from Patrick helped. Nothing better 309 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:31,800 Speaker 1: than a good fun way to relieve some stress. That's 310 00:16:31,840 --> 00:16:36,360 Speaker 1: such a dude thing to say. It helps. On Saturday, 311 00:16:36,400 --> 00:16:38,200 Speaker 1: the day we found out Biden was elected, was a 312 00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:40,440 Speaker 1: very good night of celebration. So I do think there 313 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:42,840 Speaker 1: was a couple if you're if you voted for Biden 314 00:16:42,880 --> 00:16:46,720 Speaker 1: and Biden one, obviously there's like a sense of celebration 315 00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:50,280 Speaker 1: that I don't think anybody has helped or felt this 316 00:16:50,320 --> 00:16:54,920 Speaker 1: whole entire year. Well, I mean I just counted nine 317 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:58,480 Speaker 1: months from November, Like you need to call these biden 318 00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:03,960 Speaker 1: babies babies. Um. This one says when the results came 319 00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:06,680 Speaker 1: out at how because as a woman, I felt empowered 320 00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:09,960 Speaker 1: and emotional because finally a woman was elected to one 321 00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:12,640 Speaker 1: of the highest offices in the land, and a very 322 00:17:12,680 --> 00:17:15,080 Speaker 1: independent woman to So to see a woman in such 323 00:17:15,080 --> 00:17:16,960 Speaker 1: a high office was sexy to me and I was 324 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:24,280 Speaker 1: ready to go the pencil skirt in the heels. Stella 325 00:17:24,359 --> 00:17:28,200 Speaker 1: got her groove back because what that sounds like? Um, 326 00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:34,840 Speaker 1: this U sort of related. Let's see, that's not about 327 00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:36,879 Speaker 1: a lot of people started writing it about how just 328 00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:41,679 Speaker 1: this year in general has really taken the sales out 329 00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:44,159 Speaker 1: of their sex life. And that's always interesting to me 330 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:46,400 Speaker 1: because there's two ways it's the same thing. There's two ways. 331 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:48,720 Speaker 1: I think this could go. You're at home more, so 332 00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:52,399 Speaker 1: you're having sex more if you're in a relationship. Maybe. Um. 333 00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:54,879 Speaker 1: We also mentioned a lot of our friends got into 334 00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:57,680 Speaker 1: relationships because of the COVID stuff, so there's been more sex. 335 00:17:57,880 --> 00:18:01,399 Speaker 1: From get engaged to a guy that she met, she 336 00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:04,360 Speaker 1: met him two days before they went on lockdown, which 337 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:07,200 Speaker 1: they started. I think it was two days or maybe 338 00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:10,480 Speaker 1: she'd gone on two dates with him. Um, but they 339 00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:13,640 Speaker 1: started quarantining together at the beginning and they just got 340 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:17,159 Speaker 1: engaged last week. Oh my god, that was fast. I 341 00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:21,040 Speaker 1: mean it's been there also, like today's his fiftieth birthday. 342 00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:25,280 Speaker 1: They're a little older, like he's he's been married before too, 343 00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:29,480 Speaker 1: but you know you know yeah, um yeah that I 344 00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:31,359 Speaker 1: think like that can go either way, because you could 345 00:18:31,359 --> 00:18:34,000 Speaker 1: start having more sex, or you could be so stressed 346 00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:37,360 Speaker 1: out and overwhelmed by all the crazy insanity of this year, 347 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:39,720 Speaker 1: that you just don't want to ever have sex. Right. 348 00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:42,280 Speaker 1: You could also just be tired of your being around 349 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:47,119 Speaker 1: your partner where you're like to get away. Um. This 350 00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:49,720 Speaker 1: one says it helps so much to celebrate new beginnings 351 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:54,840 Speaker 1: and new leadership, hurt because we're so stressed all the time. Um, 352 00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:57,640 Speaker 1: there's another one, so stressed, I never want to have sex. 353 00:18:58,200 --> 00:19:00,359 Speaker 1: So I found a lot of these to be the 354 00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:03,919 Speaker 1: overwhelming information was just like people don't want to have 355 00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:08,399 Speaker 1: sex and they're stressed m hm, Which is funny because 356 00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:10,760 Speaker 1: you do, like you would think that sex could be 357 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:15,080 Speaker 1: a nice distraction and um, you know, just a release 358 00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:21,760 Speaker 1: of stress. Um, but it depends Yeah, I just I 359 00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:24,920 Speaker 1: guess though, if you're so in your head about what 360 00:19:25,119 --> 00:19:28,520 Speaker 1: though is happening in the world, that maybe it's just 361 00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:31,280 Speaker 1: hard to connect, you know, one on one with your 362 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:34,359 Speaker 1: partner in a way that makes the sex good or 363 00:19:35,119 --> 00:19:38,119 Speaker 1: even feel important. I will say last week I did 364 00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:40,520 Speaker 1: not feel it. Overall this year, I think it has 365 00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:43,000 Speaker 1: helped to connect with my partner because also it's helped 366 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,000 Speaker 1: me to not feel We talked about this before, Like 367 00:19:45,280 --> 00:19:47,800 Speaker 1: I think I would have felt very isolated if I 368 00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:50,760 Speaker 1: wasn't in my relationship during this quarantine period, and so 369 00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:54,399 Speaker 1: like connecting with him in that capacity it was like 370 00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:57,320 Speaker 1: a relief, and it is a release for your body, 371 00:19:57,480 --> 00:20:00,240 Speaker 1: you know, and so like that's a stress relief. But 372 00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:03,640 Speaker 1: I can completely understand. Like like I said last week, 373 00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:06,840 Speaker 1: I was so just shut down, like I couldn't I 374 00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:10,000 Speaker 1: couldn't connect to myself. Does that make sense when you're 375 00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:13,800 Speaker 1: just so overwhelmed and stressed and like it, I think 376 00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:16,920 Speaker 1: I thought like maybe election night it would just be over, 377 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,960 Speaker 1: which is such wishful thinking. And so the way it 378 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,439 Speaker 1: got so dragged out was just like here we go again. 379 00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:25,600 Speaker 1: Nothing can be fucking easy this year, And like I'm 380 00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:28,840 Speaker 1: just tired and you just get overwhelmed. You just get 381 00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:36,000 Speaker 1: so overwhelmed. So I found this article. It's on Good Housekeeping. 382 00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:40,360 Speaker 1: They talk a lot about the relationship between stress and sex, 383 00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:43,920 Speaker 1: and um there's tips that they gave that actually that 384 00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:47,080 Speaker 1: were really helpful too. If you're feeling overwhelmed, if you're 385 00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,280 Speaker 1: feeling super stressed, here are some things you can do 386 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,840 Speaker 1: to enhance your sex life again, because as you're saying, 387 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,440 Speaker 1: it can be a stress reliever, So you don't want 388 00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:58,000 Speaker 1: to just completely shut yourself down to it. It's just like, 389 00:20:58,040 --> 00:20:59,520 Speaker 1: how do you get to the other side of what 390 00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:03,119 Speaker 1: your feeling to be able to connect and m be 391 00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:04,840 Speaker 1: with your partner again. And the number one thing they 392 00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:07,239 Speaker 1: say is talk to your partner, Like your partner might 393 00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:09,080 Speaker 1: not be aware of what you're feeling, and so if 394 00:21:09,119 --> 00:21:13,240 Speaker 1: you're not talking about it, then you're just internalizing the 395 00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:16,280 Speaker 1: stress even more. And a lot of times I think 396 00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:19,200 Speaker 1: we take things out on the people closest to us, 397 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:22,000 Speaker 1: And the more stress, the more overwhelmed your snippy. You're 398 00:21:22,119 --> 00:21:26,320 Speaker 1: like ah with your partner when it's not usually their fault. 399 00:21:26,359 --> 00:21:29,480 Speaker 1: Even there's usually less space to like filter too right 400 00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:34,040 Speaker 1: now because you're just together all the time. Yeah, this 401 00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:38,080 Speaker 1: one says make time for sex, chips favorite things, schedules set, 402 00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:43,080 Speaker 1: but they say sex isn't just about penetration. That this is. 403 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:46,200 Speaker 1: They talk a little more about scheduling later. This is 404 00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:49,639 Speaker 1: actually like take the time, Like don't go into the 405 00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:51,520 Speaker 1: back and say, Okay, we got five minutes, let's bust 406 00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:54,000 Speaker 1: this out really fast. Take the time. Sex isn't just 407 00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,600 Speaker 1: about penetration. Making time for sex play and the to 408 00:21:56,840 --> 00:22:00,159 Speaker 1: feel sexual is essential and it doesn't come with the 409 00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:03,199 Speaker 1: stress feeling that you need to achieve orgasm. So like 410 00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:05,040 Speaker 1: if you're just trying to rush it, that's just adding 411 00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:10,040 Speaker 1: even more stress. Like enjoy prolonged for play, intimate massage, 412 00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:15,959 Speaker 1: or just cuss cussing kittle. I love when that happens, kissing, 413 00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:19,440 Speaker 1: cuddle to lower the stress levels. That's great. I love 414 00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:23,479 Speaker 1: that quick sess quick sex. God, it's a great boost 415 00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:26,600 Speaker 1: for your mood to set the alarm for ten minutes earlier. Okay, 416 00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:30,480 Speaker 1: little morning sex for you. Ditch the technology. That was 417 00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:32,639 Speaker 1: my thing last week. I was literally on my phone 418 00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:36,679 Speaker 1: every fucking second, like what what's the update? What is 419 00:22:36,720 --> 00:22:38,640 Speaker 1: this person doing now? What are they saying on seeing 420 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:40,320 Speaker 1: in what are they saying on Fox, Like I was 421 00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:42,399 Speaker 1: just like all over it. I was really happy to 422 00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:44,679 Speaker 1: not have TV last week. I think that was really 423 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:46,800 Speaker 1: smart to just kind of shut it down because it 424 00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:50,080 Speaker 1: really really got to me, and especially like you don't 425 00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:52,400 Speaker 1: even like I would say to myself, Okay, just take 426 00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:54,000 Speaker 1: a break, don't check for a couple of hours, and 427 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:55,600 Speaker 1: then not just my body is just like doing it. 428 00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:59,840 Speaker 1: I'm not even thinking I'm doing it. This is masturbate More, 429 00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:03,000 Speaker 1: which we're gonna actually give. I want to talk about 430 00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:04,959 Speaker 1: last week's episode because I got a lot of feedback 431 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:06,399 Speaker 1: about it and you and I haven't really had a 432 00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:10,800 Speaker 1: chance to to download about it, which is really interesting. Um. Yeah, 433 00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:13,399 Speaker 1: it's a sex and masturbation are great stress relievers, So 434 00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:16,200 Speaker 1: make a little me time when you're feeling stressed. When 435 00:23:16,200 --> 00:23:19,200 Speaker 1: we think of sex, our brain releases dopamine, a chemical 436 00:23:19,359 --> 00:23:22,520 Speaker 1: that gives us the feeling of pleasure, lowers our blood pressure, 437 00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:26,520 Speaker 1: and creates a feeling of well being. Get more sleep. Yes, 438 00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:29,359 Speaker 1: we all know that. People and I try to do 439 00:23:29,359 --> 00:23:31,320 Speaker 1: this too, but we downplay how important sleep is. But 440 00:23:31,359 --> 00:23:35,680 Speaker 1: it's important for everything. Yeah, and I for the last 441 00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:37,960 Speaker 1: couple of weeks, like have not been setting an alarm 442 00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:39,760 Speaker 1: and just kind of been letting my body do what 443 00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:42,399 Speaker 1: it needs to do. And what's funny is is like 444 00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:45,600 Speaker 1: I feel like I actually wake up earlier you do 445 00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:48,119 Speaker 1: without setting an alarm. Yeah, And I don't know if 446 00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:51,879 Speaker 1: that's a result of stress, like my body, like my 447 00:23:51,960 --> 00:23:54,879 Speaker 1: mind thinking that I need to be waking up, or 448 00:23:55,440 --> 00:23:58,600 Speaker 1: if because I've relaxed myself, I haven't felt like I 449 00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:03,120 Speaker 1: need to be hibernating. Oh yeah, I just have wanted 450 00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:05,560 Speaker 1: to sleep so much lately. I don't know what that is. Well, 451 00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:08,000 Speaker 1: the daylight saving thing too, is probably thrown for a 452 00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:11,080 Speaker 1: little bit, but there was a lot. This one says, 453 00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:14,640 Speaker 1: talk to your g P. I guess your general practitioner. 454 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:19,679 Speaker 1: Took me a second. It was like, you're gana college 455 00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:22,520 Speaker 1: is penetrator. What that is? That sort of happens when 456 00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:25,080 Speaker 1: you go to your GANA? But okay, Um, anyway, simply 457 00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:28,040 Speaker 1: recognizing stress as a contributing factor or the cause of 458 00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,440 Speaker 1: sexual problems can be enough to help you. Just talking 459 00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:33,120 Speaker 1: to someone outside of your family can help you put 460 00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:37,400 Speaker 1: your life into perspective. I mean I think that's yeah. 461 00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:39,800 Speaker 1: I think it's like any problem, you have to recognize 462 00:24:39,800 --> 00:24:43,040 Speaker 1: there's an issue and like, I love the whole talking 463 00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:46,040 Speaker 1: to your partner thing because it's just like, hey, I'm 464 00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:48,080 Speaker 1: so overwhelmed, and like it's not that I don't want 465 00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,199 Speaker 1: to have sex with you. I just like, I just 466 00:24:50,400 --> 00:24:53,040 Speaker 1: like my body is completely shut down. But when the 467 00:24:53,119 --> 00:24:56,639 Speaker 1: part when two partners don't see eye to eye politically, 468 00:24:57,600 --> 00:25:00,680 Speaker 1: the talk to your partner thing becomes so much more complicated. 469 00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:03,000 Speaker 1: I feel like, if you were in a household that 470 00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:06,399 Speaker 1: was divided this year, you guys just got to take 471 00:25:06,440 --> 00:25:10,440 Speaker 1: a break from each other. So out speaking of So, 472 00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:13,760 Speaker 1: there's a there's an article on inc dot com um 473 00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:16,359 Speaker 1: that they did. There was a nationwide poll. It was 474 00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:20,399 Speaker 1: Wakefield Research found that one in ten Americans, which is 475 00:25:21,920 --> 00:25:26,160 Speaker 1: to me that would be but um, and one out 476 00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:31,160 Speaker 1: of five millennials have ended romantic relationships over political differences. 477 00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:34,199 Speaker 1: Three out of ten Americans have experienced a negative impact 478 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:37,679 Speaker 1: on the relationship due to general political climate. One in 479 00:25:37,720 --> 00:25:42,240 Speaker 1: five Americans and three out of ten millennials no a 480 00:25:42,359 --> 00:25:45,960 Speaker 1: couple whose marriage or relationship has been negatively impacted due 481 00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:50,800 Speaker 1: to President Trump's election. So this is this survey was 482 00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:56,320 Speaker 1: done pre this election. A third of the individuals who 483 00:25:56,359 --> 00:25:59,919 Speaker 1: did not support Trump say that they would consider divo 484 00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:05,160 Speaker 1: are seeing their partner if they don't um The level 485 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:08,200 Speaker 1: of relationship difficulty resulting from the Trump presidency is nearly 486 00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:11,040 Speaker 1: on par with finances, which is often cited as the 487 00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:14,760 Speaker 1: biggest source of relationships. One out of five couples fault 488 00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,359 Speaker 1: about Trump's policies more than money, and about a quarter 489 00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:21,199 Speaker 1: of those survives surveyed say Trump's election win has led 490 00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:24,120 Speaker 1: to more political disagreements and arguments with their partner than 491 00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:26,000 Speaker 1: ever before. Well, I think you and I have talked 492 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:27,760 Speaker 1: about this a lot, I know, amongst our friend grave 493 00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:29,880 Speaker 1: and stuff. This and what we were saying earlier about 494 00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,959 Speaker 1: it being so divided this year is it's different than 495 00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:35,399 Speaker 1: every other year because I think when you see a 496 00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:37,800 Speaker 1: person vote on the other side of you, you have 497 00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:43,760 Speaker 1: this recognition, reignition that maybe your core values are different. Right, 498 00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:47,280 Speaker 1: That's what hit me This year was like not necessarily 499 00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:49,959 Speaker 1: like oh, you know, agree to disagree kind of vibe. 500 00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,679 Speaker 1: It was like, oh, ship, this person that is in 501 00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:56,280 Speaker 1: my life feels so completely differently than me than like, 502 00:26:56,359 --> 00:26:58,960 Speaker 1: how are we connecting on any level because like these 503 00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:03,240 Speaker 1: core issues are so different. Well, and there was a 504 00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:06,120 Speaker 1: like breezed through a story in the New York Times, 505 00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:09,679 Speaker 1: and you know, there were examples of couples that like 506 00:27:09,760 --> 00:27:13,000 Speaker 1: had been married for years and politics wasn't anything they 507 00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:16,159 Speaker 1: ever really talked about. And I wonder if some of 508 00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:19,800 Speaker 1: that had to do with, um, the fact that for 509 00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:23,760 Speaker 1: the first time truly a non politician was in the 510 00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:27,359 Speaker 1: White House. Whereas before it was like you could kind 511 00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:32,240 Speaker 1: of like, um, understand that there were going to be differences, 512 00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:35,119 Speaker 1: but like it was all just politics. Like suddenly it 513 00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:37,439 Speaker 1: was like and I know this was true for me. 514 00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:42,920 Speaker 1: I'm like, this is so beyond politicssum. That is why 515 00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:45,440 Speaker 1: I struggled with people that had a different view of me, 516 00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:47,720 Speaker 1: Like like I was like, I don't give a shit 517 00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:49,919 Speaker 1: about taxes at this point, I don't give a Like 518 00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:52,480 Speaker 1: this is about being a good human or not being 519 00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:56,440 Speaker 1: a good human. And so if you take that into 520 00:27:56,480 --> 00:28:00,920 Speaker 1: a romantic relationship and you're like, you don't think that 521 00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:03,639 Speaker 1: children in cages is a problem? Are you think that 522 00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:07,840 Speaker 1: sexually assaulting a woman is not a problem? Like that 523 00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:12,159 Speaker 1: is core? Like that is fundamentally at your core, Right, 524 00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:14,640 Speaker 1: So how do you build a relationship? Yeah, I mean 525 00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:17,440 Speaker 1: that's like if you were married and it's never really 526 00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:19,879 Speaker 1: come up before. That's interesting to me though, because like, 527 00:28:20,119 --> 00:28:22,600 Speaker 1: I don't see how that happens either as an adult, 528 00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:25,640 Speaker 1: how you don't talk about politics ever, But maybe it 529 00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:29,359 Speaker 1: wasn't so divided and you're just kind of like we 530 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:31,840 Speaker 1: just disagree, and some people are just like, fucking I 531 00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:34,440 Speaker 1: want tax cuts, sure, I care about the other show 532 00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,760 Speaker 1: like sure. And so if that is the case, then 533 00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:40,000 Speaker 1: I could see where it would be easier to be 534 00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:42,960 Speaker 1: like and I mean, you're still the person that I love, Yeah, 535 00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,480 Speaker 1: of course, we just have different of course. Yeah, I 536 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:48,360 Speaker 1: think sexual assault is terrible and children in cages is terrible, 537 00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:52,080 Speaker 1: but I'm more worried about my taxes, right, But what 538 00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:55,160 Speaker 1: your other point is is like this or what my 539 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:57,760 Speaker 1: point was this, It's just such a core values thing 540 00:28:57,800 --> 00:29:00,960 Speaker 1: that I think it can really way on a relationship, 541 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:03,600 Speaker 1: So anyone out there, I mean, I hope it's mostly 542 00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:06,640 Speaker 1: like the one message we got about the her boyfriend 543 00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:08,479 Speaker 1: being or she's being a trumper and her boyfriend being 544 00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:11,040 Speaker 1: a bidener, that they can just move on after this week. 545 00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:13,000 Speaker 1: And I hope that's how the whole thing goes for 546 00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,560 Speaker 1: our whole country. And you know what went in doubt 547 00:29:16,080 --> 00:29:20,800 Speaker 1: masturbade apparently sneak away and diddle your bit. Yeah. So 548 00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:23,200 Speaker 1: speaking of that, so did you listen to the episode 549 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:26,200 Speaker 1: last week with Dr Harry and what were you thinking? Well, 550 00:29:26,240 --> 00:29:28,280 Speaker 1: first of all, I didn't know anything about him, and 551 00:29:28,280 --> 00:29:31,240 Speaker 1: I could tell he was he was older, which like 552 00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:35,440 Speaker 1: a kind of blew my mind. I thought it was 553 00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:38,920 Speaker 1: gonna be like this like young person like um, he 554 00:29:39,080 --> 00:29:43,120 Speaker 1: was like yo, bro, here's what you do and not um. 555 00:29:43,280 --> 00:29:46,440 Speaker 1: And and he wasn't like like I also think too 556 00:29:46,520 --> 00:29:48,120 Speaker 1: why I was like sort of thrown by it was 557 00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:52,520 Speaker 1: he wasn't like um rigidly clinical about it either, like 558 00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:56,280 Speaker 1: he used terms like get off. I don't know, I 559 00:29:56,680 --> 00:29:59,760 Speaker 1: really enjoyed the conversation. I you know, it's it's funny 560 00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:03,440 Speaker 1: becau as we talk about communication a lot, and it 561 00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:06,360 Speaker 1: really does come down to that. And he, you know, 562 00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:12,040 Speaker 1: he um. He brought up the point of taking you 563 00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:15,360 Speaker 1: out of how to avoid an argument about these things 564 00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:18,120 Speaker 1: because truly, and it's like I think it really applies 565 00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:22,320 Speaker 1: to almost anything in life, Like if you're in a 566 00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:25,920 Speaker 1: relationship and something isn't working for you, you have to 567 00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:28,840 Speaker 1: approach it of why it's not working for you, Like 568 00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:31,480 Speaker 1: you can't be like you do this and you do 569 00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:34,440 Speaker 1: that and blah blah blah, and you're masturbating too much. 570 00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:37,840 Speaker 1: It's gonna be like, well, I recognize that you masturbate 571 00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:39,760 Speaker 1: a lot, and this is what it makes me feel. 572 00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:43,840 Speaker 1: So then that person can take that information and be like, oh, 573 00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:45,840 Speaker 1: I didn't know it was affecting you in that way, 574 00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:49,640 Speaker 1: and then process it and figure out a solution. And 575 00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:51,760 Speaker 1: I love that he pointed that out because it is 576 00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:56,800 Speaker 1: so like, especially when like the particular topic is talking about, 577 00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:59,080 Speaker 1: like someone hiding in a room and masturbating ten times 578 00:30:59,120 --> 00:31:02,080 Speaker 1: a day, Like that is something that would very easily 579 00:31:02,160 --> 00:31:06,880 Speaker 1: be like, why are you masturbating so much? To react 580 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:08,840 Speaker 1: in that way when you want to put the blame, 581 00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:12,200 Speaker 1: Like I know, for me, in in any sort of relationship, 582 00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:16,160 Speaker 1: when something's impacting me, I have these feelings. I immediately 583 00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:18,640 Speaker 1: my natural instinct, and I think this is a very 584 00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:22,320 Speaker 1: human instinct, is to go what they're doing is making 585 00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:24,840 Speaker 1: me feel this way? And like, the reality is we 586 00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:27,680 Speaker 1: all have our own feelings and our own reactions based 587 00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:30,680 Speaker 1: on our own experiences in life, and so yes, what 588 00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:33,360 Speaker 1: someone's doing you like you could not like a certain behavior, 589 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:36,440 Speaker 1: but like your reaction and your feeling is completely your 590 00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:40,240 Speaker 1: own and of your own experience, So I do I 591 00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,640 Speaker 1: love the same thing that he He really put some 592 00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:45,480 Speaker 1: emphasis on like communicating that from that standpoint and not 593 00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:48,000 Speaker 1: getting accusatory, like that's never going to go well, right, 594 00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:50,240 Speaker 1: it just doesn't. I mean, trust me, I'm saying that 595 00:31:50,280 --> 00:31:52,760 Speaker 1: from experience, well, and the truth, and the truth is is, 596 00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:57,160 Speaker 1: like you know, it's I think to um, when we 597 00:31:57,240 --> 00:32:01,560 Speaker 1: approach issues in our relationship of like looking for someone 598 00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:06,640 Speaker 1: to blame, then you go down that spiral of like, um, 599 00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:09,000 Speaker 1: you're putting the y in there and like you're creating 600 00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,400 Speaker 1: all these situations, whereas really what you just need to 601 00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:13,640 Speaker 1: say is like, hey man, I don't feel good, Like 602 00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:15,720 Speaker 1: that doesn't make me feel good, Like can you explain 603 00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:17,440 Speaker 1: to me why you do it? And it could literally 604 00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:21,360 Speaker 1: be simple. It's like, oh my god, I didn't like 605 00:32:21,360 --> 00:32:24,200 Speaker 1: like well, especially with this topic, because I think there's 606 00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:25,920 Speaker 1: so many stories we can make up in our head 607 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,880 Speaker 1: about why someone would do this, or like if you've 608 00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:30,760 Speaker 1: had a past experience like mine where it was an 609 00:32:30,840 --> 00:32:33,920 Speaker 1: issue within a relationship, then you really conspiral out of 610 00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:37,280 Speaker 1: control with it, and it's very it seems like even 611 00:32:37,400 --> 00:32:41,120 Speaker 1: more important to have the conversation within your relationship. And 612 00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:44,040 Speaker 1: I love that he pointed out every relationship so different, 613 00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:47,240 Speaker 1: Like some relationships might be like yeah, no, poor, no masturbation. 614 00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:50,240 Speaker 1: That does not work for us. Other relationships maybe like sure, 615 00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:51,959 Speaker 1: I don't give a funk about that. Do it as 616 00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:54,400 Speaker 1: much as you want. Yeah, And so I think it's 617 00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:57,640 Speaker 1: really important. I also love that he pointed out it's 618 00:32:57,640 --> 00:33:00,880 Speaker 1: not a one time conversation. It's like something they're gonna 619 00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:03,240 Speaker 1: have to do throughout your relationship. And I started thinking 620 00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:07,080 Speaker 1: through that, like right, because you know, your relationship goes 621 00:33:07,080 --> 00:33:09,920 Speaker 1: through so many phases, like when you get married, you 622 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:12,080 Speaker 1: might be having a ton of sex, or then like 623 00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:14,000 Speaker 1: what if there's a relationship where there's a lot of 624 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:17,800 Speaker 1: travel involved and so you're not together after a baby. 625 00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:19,440 Speaker 1: I mean I know when I was doing all my 626 00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:22,280 Speaker 1: fertility stuff, like I couldn't have sex, so you know, 627 00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:24,720 Speaker 1: like that would have been a good time. I mean 628 00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:26,600 Speaker 1: I don't. We weren't in a place to have that 629 00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:28,720 Speaker 1: conversation really at that point. But like if I was 630 00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:32,160 Speaker 1: further withinto my relationship, I might be like, hey, so 631 00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:35,360 Speaker 1: what's our new protocol, or let's like have a conversation 632 00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:38,120 Speaker 1: so that we both feel comfortable because I do think 633 00:33:38,800 --> 00:33:41,040 Speaker 1: as hard as these conversations are to have, because I 634 00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:45,240 Speaker 1: think it's it's a lot of people associated with shameful behavior. Um, 635 00:33:45,320 --> 00:33:48,080 Speaker 1: I'm hoping we're getting better about that, but like, I 636 00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:50,960 Speaker 1: think they're really hard conversations to have. But I think 637 00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,720 Speaker 1: the biggest issue for most people, if we're really being 638 00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:56,840 Speaker 1: honest with ourselves, is the secrecy. Like that's what makes 639 00:33:56,840 --> 00:34:00,200 Speaker 1: me uncomfortable about it the wise, Like you said, but 640 00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:03,840 Speaker 1: if you know, obviously you can't just masturbate sitting on 641 00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:08,120 Speaker 1: the couch, you know, like you're not used to um 642 00:34:08,160 --> 00:34:11,239 Speaker 1: masturbating publicly. I mean, yeah, of course you could, but 643 00:34:11,280 --> 00:34:14,760 Speaker 1: like you grow up and you you create a pattern 644 00:34:14,840 --> 00:34:16,759 Speaker 1: of how you're going to do it. So it's like 645 00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:19,520 Speaker 1: a guy, and I can obviously only speak from the 646 00:34:19,520 --> 00:34:22,520 Speaker 1: male perspective, but like a guy, doesn't you know, you're 647 00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:24,680 Speaker 1: not just sitting around masturbating in front of your parents. 648 00:34:25,360 --> 00:34:29,160 Speaker 1: So it's the idea of masturbating, like you associate that 649 00:34:29,239 --> 00:34:33,480 Speaker 1: with like hiding in a room somewhere. So it's it's 650 00:34:34,120 --> 00:34:37,440 Speaker 1: um not necessarily because you're not doing it because you 651 00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:39,520 Speaker 1: don't enjoy the sex with your partner. You're doing it 652 00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:42,239 Speaker 1: because you feel like you want to get off and 653 00:34:42,360 --> 00:34:44,680 Speaker 1: you have you you find yourself in a quiet room 654 00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:47,480 Speaker 1: or whatever. You know, you you find yourself alone, you're 655 00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:51,080 Speaker 1: in a hotel room or whatever. Um and it I 656 00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:54,359 Speaker 1: mean I think like he even made the point like 657 00:34:55,120 --> 00:34:58,279 Speaker 1: um when he was talking about like porn isn't a documentary. 658 00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:02,280 Speaker 1: It is literally just this thing that you know, people 659 00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:04,080 Speaker 1: have figured out, like it's a quick way to like 660 00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:06,719 Speaker 1: get off the lazy man sex what he called it. 661 00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:10,359 Speaker 1: I loved that too. Actually, that for me as a 662 00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:14,160 Speaker 1: female helped when I just thought, oh my god, that 663 00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:16,680 Speaker 1: makes so much. That just clicked for me something of 664 00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:19,719 Speaker 1: like I think, as women, we can go, oh, they 665 00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:21,840 Speaker 1: want to go look at this hot girl, and so 666 00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:24,160 Speaker 1: then you start comparing yourself and it can feel like, well, 667 00:35:24,160 --> 00:35:25,880 Speaker 1: why wouldn't he want to do that with me? Or 668 00:35:25,920 --> 00:35:28,480 Speaker 1: like you know, why would he take that route instead 669 00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:31,080 Speaker 1: of like come find me and let's have sex or whatever. 670 00:35:31,680 --> 00:35:34,440 Speaker 1: And I thought about it, I'm like, oh my gosh, 671 00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:37,200 Speaker 1: because there isn't this pressure to like have to get 672 00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:41,880 Speaker 1: someone else off either. There's a lot more emotional ties 673 00:35:42,120 --> 00:35:44,360 Speaker 1: that happened that like, you know, you have to be 674 00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:47,760 Speaker 1: connected emotionally, you can't just like phone it in or whatever, 675 00:35:47,880 --> 00:35:50,160 Speaker 1: and so like, yeah, if you don't feel like doing that, 676 00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:51,560 Speaker 1: you're just like, oh, I just need to get off. 677 00:35:52,480 --> 00:35:54,520 Speaker 1: That's just like the easy route out. I'm not saying 678 00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:57,319 Speaker 1: that's like good or bad. It just is somatic when 679 00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,000 Speaker 1: like he's choosing to not have sex with you any 680 00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:03,640 Speaker 1: more because too much like if he's still sucking you, 681 00:36:03,800 --> 00:36:06,480 Speaker 1: like it shouldn't matter to you how many times he's 682 00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:08,480 Speaker 1: working off the day. Really yeah, I mean I think 683 00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:10,320 Speaker 1: everyone can have their own he's not showing off for 684 00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:13,480 Speaker 1: work or helping with the kids, which were some examples 685 00:36:13,480 --> 00:36:19,160 Speaker 1: that um he mentioned. Um yeah. I I also thought 686 00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:21,480 Speaker 1: it was really interesting that he pointed out that most 687 00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:25,040 Speaker 1: guys like they don't it's not even about like, yeah, 688 00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:28,160 Speaker 1: they might think that woman's hot, but it's not about 689 00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:30,920 Speaker 1: like it's never about like them thinking that they're hotter 690 00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:35,200 Speaker 1: than you. It's plays a completely different role. It's just 691 00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:38,120 Speaker 1: it's entertainment, like he said, And I mean, yeah, that's 692 00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:43,560 Speaker 1: an interesting It was a very interesting perspective. I've really enjoyed. Um. 693 00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:45,799 Speaker 1: I didn't feel like he was like downplaying it, but 694 00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:48,600 Speaker 1: not like it was more of like an ease about 695 00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:51,560 Speaker 1: the conversation. That helped me to understand maybe and not 696 00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:55,239 Speaker 1: take things, you know, like in certain ways. And I 697 00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:57,480 Speaker 1: think that there's a lot of stuff that because it 698 00:36:57,520 --> 00:37:00,800 Speaker 1: hasn't been openly discussed in our society, I d in general, 699 00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:02,600 Speaker 1: and there is so much shame and it is kept 700 00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:05,239 Speaker 1: more private that we make up the stories. And you know, 701 00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:07,920 Speaker 1: as a woman, you're like, well, he just wants to, 702 00:37:08,120 --> 00:37:10,880 Speaker 1: you know, suck a porn star. I guess like my 703 00:37:10,960 --> 00:37:12,759 Speaker 1: boobs aren't as big as hers, or you just start 704 00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:15,040 Speaker 1: doing all the ship and it's like, no, that's not 705 00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:17,719 Speaker 1: really probably what's happening. It could be, but like in 706 00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:20,600 Speaker 1: most cases, probably not right. So I just thought it 707 00:37:20,640 --> 00:37:23,160 Speaker 1: was really interesting. Um, if you guys have not listened, 708 00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:26,880 Speaker 1: it's the episode of at Casual where I interview Dr 709 00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:29,760 Speaker 1: David Yerian. He is a sex therapist here in Nashville. 710 00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:31,600 Speaker 1: He's also been on the Velvet Such podcast just to 711 00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:34,279 Speaker 1: talk about sex in general. He's great, Like, he was 712 00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:37,719 Speaker 1: so informative. I also was kind of it blew my 713 00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:41,759 Speaker 1: mind when he said that sex addiction isn't uh an 714 00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:45,000 Speaker 1: official diagnosis. Yeah, I actually knew that. It's so interesting, 715 00:37:45,080 --> 00:37:47,960 Speaker 1: isn't it see to me, like sometimes stuff takes a 716 00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:49,839 Speaker 1: long time to get into the d M. I think 717 00:37:49,880 --> 00:37:52,080 Speaker 1: it's d S, m V or whatever that is the 718 00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:55,200 Speaker 1: diagnosis thing, And that doesn't mean it's not real. Like 719 00:37:56,400 --> 00:37:58,240 Speaker 1: I don't know. I just think some things are slower, 720 00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:01,160 Speaker 1: Like I think alcohol addiction to a long time for 721 00:38:01,239 --> 00:38:03,400 Speaker 1: like alcoholics weren't put in there as a disease for 722 00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:05,920 Speaker 1: a really long time. Yeah, but maybe maybe there is 723 00:38:05,960 --> 00:38:09,839 Speaker 1: something scientific is um in the fact that like you're 724 00:38:09,840 --> 00:38:12,480 Speaker 1: not going to go through a withdrawal from not having sex, 725 00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:17,200 Speaker 1: you know, I don't know. I honestly I am the 726 00:38:17,280 --> 00:38:19,960 Speaker 1: least scientific person when it comes to this, So I 727 00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:22,720 Speaker 1: mean I have no idea. But like that really surprised 728 00:38:22,760 --> 00:38:25,839 Speaker 1: me because I've heard the term sex addict or sex 729 00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:30,799 Speaker 1: addiction for for forever. Yeah. Um, that it was, And 730 00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:36,560 Speaker 1: he was kind of nonchalant about it, said something about like, um, 731 00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:39,840 Speaker 1: it's um, it's more about having an out of control 732 00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:43,280 Speaker 1: relationship with sex. Well, I agree with that. It's to me, um, 733 00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:46,200 Speaker 1: sex addiction is similar to like food addiction, Like, so 734 00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:48,920 Speaker 1: you're not going to stop eating, right, so like you're 735 00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:51,560 Speaker 1: not gonna stop having sex, but it's about finding a 736 00:38:51,560 --> 00:38:56,080 Speaker 1: healthy relationship with sex versus a addiction to I think 737 00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:58,719 Speaker 1: what I know about sex addiction is it's mostly they 738 00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:00,920 Speaker 1: referred to it as an addiction to us, and so 739 00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:04,040 Speaker 1: like you're constantly chasing after that thing, whatever it might be, 740 00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,440 Speaker 1: whether it's porn addiction, whether it's you just have to 741 00:39:07,520 --> 00:39:10,320 Speaker 1: keep having sex over and over and over with multiple partners, 742 00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:13,319 Speaker 1: or you know what I mean. So um, but I 743 00:39:13,360 --> 00:39:15,680 Speaker 1: do think I walked away from the conversation last week 744 00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:20,080 Speaker 1: with Dr Yarian about feeling about masturbation and even porn 745 00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:23,640 Speaker 1: in a similar way to to anything that it's about moderation. 746 00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:26,480 Speaker 1: And I think another thing is if you can get 747 00:39:26,480 --> 00:39:28,960 Speaker 1: there with your partner. I think it's about honesty and 748 00:39:29,040 --> 00:39:32,160 Speaker 1: then if you can balance those two things. Actually think 749 00:39:32,160 --> 00:39:34,360 Speaker 1: it could enhance your relationship in a lot of ways, 750 00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:37,399 Speaker 1: because everyone knows what they want a lot. He also 751 00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:38,759 Speaker 1: brought up, you know a lot of people like to 752 00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:41,959 Speaker 1: do that together. That can be like a bonding experience, 753 00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:44,040 Speaker 1: or like if you travel, you know there's always like 754 00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:46,239 Speaker 1: face time where you can do it together, and like 755 00:39:46,560 --> 00:39:49,600 Speaker 1: that's another connecting way. And I don't know, I think 756 00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:52,440 Speaker 1: that's just like I'm really glad because I know these 757 00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:55,400 Speaker 1: topics have been super super scary to me in the past, 758 00:39:55,480 --> 00:39:57,200 Speaker 1: and so I'm really glad that I feel like our 759 00:39:57,239 --> 00:40:00,400 Speaker 1: society as a whole has a lot of he alers 760 00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:05,120 Speaker 1: in like um, just researchers even coming out talking about 761 00:40:05,120 --> 00:40:08,520 Speaker 1: these conversations and giving us tools to navigate them in 762 00:40:08,560 --> 00:40:11,520 Speaker 1: a more healthy way that's not full of shame, you know, 763 00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:13,960 Speaker 1: because like our bodies are made to feel good. That's 764 00:40:13,960 --> 00:40:16,600 Speaker 1: just it. Yeah. I mean he talks about like in Utero, 765 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,040 Speaker 1: we touch our gables in our mouths exactly. That was 766 00:40:19,080 --> 00:40:22,120 Speaker 1: another really interesting thing. So I just don't want people 767 00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:23,680 Speaker 1: to be so dug into a hole because I don't 768 00:40:23,719 --> 00:40:26,680 Speaker 1: think shame helps anything. It doesn't make you want to 769 00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:28,279 Speaker 1: stop something. It just makes you want to be more 770 00:40:28,280 --> 00:40:30,480 Speaker 1: secret at well. And I thought it was really interesting 771 00:40:30,520 --> 00:40:32,759 Speaker 1: too because it made me think about sort of my 772 00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:36,400 Speaker 1: path here, and to be quite honest, doing this podcast 773 00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:39,480 Speaker 1: has opened me up so much just talking about sex. 774 00:40:39,560 --> 00:40:41,640 Speaker 1: Like there was a moment last week when it was 775 00:40:41,680 --> 00:40:44,640 Speaker 1: like the group of us that like went we hung 776 00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:45,960 Speaker 1: out for a bit and then we all like went 777 00:40:46,000 --> 00:40:47,879 Speaker 1: and took naps or something, and like at dinner, Mary 778 00:40:47,960 --> 00:40:50,120 Speaker 1: Hilliard was like, would you like jack off and then 779 00:40:50,120 --> 00:40:53,640 Speaker 1: take a nap. And I was like yep. And normally 780 00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:56,359 Speaker 1: I would have been like, no, you know what I mean. 781 00:40:56,520 --> 00:40:59,040 Speaker 1: I was like yep, and I think too. It's like 782 00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:01,399 Speaker 1: our friend group has and we've been like, we're really 783 00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:03,920 Speaker 1: opening up about talking about this kind of stuff right now. 784 00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:07,120 Speaker 1: It's normal. When he said, I mean when he goes 785 00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:08,560 Speaker 1: I grew up in a house, when I was like, 786 00:41:09,040 --> 00:41:11,840 Speaker 1: the advice was don't have it, Like that was the 787 00:41:11,920 --> 00:41:15,319 Speaker 1: extent of the sex talk I got. Don't have it um. 788 00:41:15,560 --> 00:41:17,680 Speaker 1: In fact, really I wonder if I still have the letter. 789 00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:20,600 Speaker 1: My dad never talked to me about it, and I 790 00:41:20,600 --> 00:41:23,279 Speaker 1: don't even know if my mom really did um. But 791 00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:26,000 Speaker 1: I my dad left a letter in my car when 792 00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:28,120 Speaker 1: I went to college, or gave me a letter when 793 00:41:28,160 --> 00:41:31,000 Speaker 1: I went to college that basically said, like, when I 794 00:41:31,040 --> 00:41:32,600 Speaker 1: went to college, the only thing I had to worry 795 00:41:32,600 --> 00:41:37,680 Speaker 1: about was like STDs and getting somebody pregnant. Now you 796 00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:41,879 Speaker 1: can die from sex because AIDS was And I was like, well, 797 00:41:41,880 --> 00:41:44,719 Speaker 1: that's an ominous fucking tone, you know what I mean? 798 00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:49,399 Speaker 1: And it was there was never a conversation about like 799 00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:53,080 Speaker 1: even yeah, but it was like it was not a 800 00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:57,240 Speaker 1: conversation of like, look, you're gonna do this, just be careful. 801 00:41:57,560 --> 00:42:00,520 Speaker 1: You know. It was almost like don't do it, which 802 00:42:00,600 --> 00:42:03,160 Speaker 1: is not that our bodies are not had for that 803 00:42:03,600 --> 00:42:06,880 Speaker 1: really really unhealthy, But I think it's a it's a pattern, 804 00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:09,360 Speaker 1: like that's pretty he didn't know how like because of 805 00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:11,719 Speaker 1: the weirdness and the shame around it. Like, I mean, 806 00:42:11,760 --> 00:42:15,919 Speaker 1: I do think that, like you know, you go when 807 00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:20,080 Speaker 1: I see people from more cultured countries, their approach and 808 00:42:20,200 --> 00:42:22,239 Speaker 1: the way that they talk about sex is very just 809 00:42:22,280 --> 00:42:26,240 Speaker 1: like matter of fact. Yeah, you gotta France or England. 810 00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:29,240 Speaker 1: There's like breasts on TV. I know, I wonder how 811 00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:32,080 Speaker 1: America got the way we are. I think it was 812 00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:36,839 Speaker 1: it was a religious thing, yeah, yeah, And I mean 813 00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:39,360 Speaker 1: obviously they're always it seems to be the where you 814 00:42:39,400 --> 00:42:41,520 Speaker 1: go to the opposite extreme, and so that there's a 815 00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:44,520 Speaker 1: lot of like super extremes of too, and so I'm 816 00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:48,200 Speaker 1: trying to find my way from not to completely shut 817 00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:51,040 Speaker 1: down to not super extreme and finding somewhere in the 818 00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:56,000 Speaker 1: middle that's like an honest, open place about sexuality that's like, hey, 819 00:42:56,040 --> 00:42:58,120 Speaker 1: I'm going to do this and I like to do it, 820 00:42:58,560 --> 00:43:02,000 Speaker 1: and that I can talk to a partner about whatever 821 00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:04,200 Speaker 1: it is that we're going through at that time, but like, 822 00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:07,319 Speaker 1: just be open and honest with each other and keep 823 00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:11,120 Speaker 1: continuing to grow and just be realistic, like you're not 824 00:43:11,160 --> 00:43:13,840 Speaker 1: going to not have sex and like in your life, 825 00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:16,480 Speaker 1: and you're probably not going to not masturbate at some point, 826 00:43:16,680 --> 00:43:19,719 Speaker 1: you know. Totally. What you said just made me think 827 00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:22,400 Speaker 1: of the lyric from Follow Your Arrow by Casey Musgraves. 828 00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:25,520 Speaker 1: So if you all don't know the song, it's the 829 00:43:25,560 --> 00:43:28,520 Speaker 1: first lyrics. It says, if you save yourself for marriage, 830 00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:31,560 Speaker 1: you're a bore. If you if you don't save yourself 831 00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:35,560 Speaker 1: for marriage, you're a horror and person. And it's like 832 00:43:35,719 --> 00:43:39,600 Speaker 1: it's true. It's like we have this thing, particularly in America, 833 00:43:39,680 --> 00:43:43,080 Speaker 1: where it's like there's no in between, like you you're 834 00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:46,560 Speaker 1: there are a virgin or your whore totally, and which 835 00:43:47,239 --> 00:43:49,160 Speaker 1: causes you to want to be quiet about the things 836 00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:52,439 Speaker 1: that you're doing because there's this judgment that's floating out there. Yeah, 837 00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:55,560 Speaker 1: I'm feeling a shift, and I hope that I think 838 00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:57,600 Speaker 1: our conversations and the feedback I get from a lot 839 00:43:57,600 --> 00:43:59,680 Speaker 1: of you guys on my Instagram is just thank you 840 00:43:59,719 --> 00:44:02,480 Speaker 1: so much talking about this topic because I've wondered about 841 00:44:02,520 --> 00:44:05,160 Speaker 1: this and like nobody's talking about it or I don't 842 00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:07,719 Speaker 1: even feel comfortable talking about it, but us talking about 843 00:44:07,760 --> 00:44:09,799 Speaker 1: it seems to be helping some people to feel just 844 00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:12,440 Speaker 1: more to normal as it, you know. And so the 845 00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:14,160 Speaker 1: other thing he said, and I'm now we're just like 846 00:44:14,200 --> 00:44:15,960 Speaker 1: saying the whole thing so you won't have to listen, 847 00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:18,600 Speaker 1: but um, you should listen when he brings up the 848 00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:20,719 Speaker 1: analogy of like, we go to the movies and we 849 00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:24,120 Speaker 1: see movies like Fast and the Furious where people are 850 00:44:24,160 --> 00:44:28,759 Speaker 1: like driving, they're driving cars to an insane degree. But 851 00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:31,680 Speaker 1: it doesn't it doesn't make anyone think that they need 852 00:44:31,719 --> 00:44:35,800 Speaker 1: to go out and drive like that. So why watching porn, 853 00:44:35,960 --> 00:44:39,920 Speaker 1: which is made to be entertainment, does it make like 854 00:44:39,960 --> 00:44:42,360 Speaker 1: are we our brains are like, well I need to 855 00:44:42,360 --> 00:44:45,120 Speaker 1: funk like that? Or right, you know, but that was 856 00:44:45,200 --> 00:44:49,440 Speaker 1: such a good thing. I do that the younger generations, 857 00:44:50,120 --> 00:44:53,000 Speaker 1: because they've grown up with porn being so easy to 858 00:44:53,080 --> 00:44:55,319 Speaker 1: access and all of this stuff, they start asso saying, oh, 859 00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:56,719 Speaker 1: this is how you have sex, or that's how a 860 00:44:56,760 --> 00:44:58,759 Speaker 1: lot of kids are learning to have sex. I mean, 861 00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:04,040 Speaker 1: we had to like advocate our way through it. But um, yeah, 862 00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:06,600 Speaker 1: if that's all you're learning to have sex then you know, 863 00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:08,920 Speaker 1: I don't know that would be really tough. And I 864 00:45:09,080 --> 00:45:11,560 Speaker 1: I said this in that podcast, but so much of 865 00:45:11,560 --> 00:45:15,719 Speaker 1: porn is geared towards heterosexual men, and so if you're 866 00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:19,640 Speaker 1: in any other category, I think it's like, wait, but 867 00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:21,359 Speaker 1: what about me? What about me? What about what I 868 00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:24,040 Speaker 1: like and like? And those are the kinds of things 869 00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:25,920 Speaker 1: that like you are left to your own devices to 870 00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:28,640 Speaker 1: kind of figure out, and so that is important. Well, 871 00:45:28,680 --> 00:45:30,360 Speaker 1: I think that brings up a really good point, and 872 00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:35,960 Speaker 1: I would I would almost say, like urge parents to acknowledge, 873 00:45:36,719 --> 00:45:41,040 Speaker 1: like I think this conversation because porn is so like 874 00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:44,279 Speaker 1: at your fingertips these days. Yeah, I think it's a 875 00:45:44,360 --> 00:45:48,600 Speaker 1: really important conversation to have with your kids, Like now 876 00:45:48,680 --> 00:45:50,680 Speaker 1: more than ever, Like parents need to talk to their 877 00:45:50,719 --> 00:45:53,359 Speaker 1: children about the way that they're going to feel and 878 00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:56,879 Speaker 1: like just sex in general, and to warn them not 879 00:45:57,040 --> 00:46:00,400 Speaker 1: to like don't watch porn that's disgusting, but like to 880 00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:02,560 Speaker 1: give it to frame it like the Fast and the 881 00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:06,399 Speaker 1: Furious examples. It's it's a great example to like tell 882 00:46:06,480 --> 00:46:09,840 Speaker 1: your kids. And it's because otherwise, if they're scared to 883 00:46:09,880 --> 00:46:11,560 Speaker 1: talk to you about it, they are going to believe 884 00:46:11,560 --> 00:46:15,560 Speaker 1: that that's how sex is supposed to be. Absolutely I agree. Well, 885 00:46:15,560 --> 00:46:17,680 Speaker 1: we're going to keep talking about it on at Casual 886 00:46:17,760 --> 00:46:19,680 Speaker 1: And if you guys have not checked out that episode 887 00:46:19,680 --> 00:46:23,319 Speaker 1: from last week, it's with Dr David Yaryan and the 888 00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:28,080 Speaker 1: topic is our porn and masturbation hurting or helping your relationships? 889 00:46:28,080 --> 00:46:30,480 Speaker 1: So we got a ton of questions. I feel like 890 00:46:30,480 --> 00:46:33,480 Speaker 1: that was actually probably one of the main topics that 891 00:46:33,560 --> 00:46:36,680 Speaker 1: people have written in overall to us to talk about. 892 00:46:36,719 --> 00:46:38,920 Speaker 1: And you and we're both like, we don't know what's healthy. 893 00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,880 Speaker 1: I don't know, don't ask us, So we had to 894 00:46:41,880 --> 00:46:44,279 Speaker 1: call in the expert on that one. But um, you 895 00:46:44,280 --> 00:46:46,440 Speaker 1: guys also keep all the questions coming. Chips, you have 896 00:46:46,480 --> 00:46:48,880 Speaker 1: anything else you want to like sign off with for 897 00:46:48,920 --> 00:46:51,919 Speaker 1: this week? What are your weekend plans? Here? Man got well, 898 00:46:51,960 --> 00:46:55,880 Speaker 1: tomorrow is my birthday? What good? I just realized what 899 00:46:56,000 --> 00:47:01,040 Speaker 1: fucking day it is? You're right, tomorrow? That sounds really 900 00:47:01,080 --> 00:47:05,439 Speaker 1: old to me, like it's halfway to ninety. Yeah, isn't 901 00:47:05,480 --> 00:47:09,560 Speaker 1: that weird? Weird? It's how are you feeling about it? 902 00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:14,280 Speaker 1: It's fine, It's just another day, you know, Like, um, 903 00:47:14,320 --> 00:47:18,200 Speaker 1: but yeah, tomorrow, my god, I totally totally spaced on 904 00:47:18,239 --> 00:47:21,000 Speaker 1: what this week was. I mean, I can't believe it's November. 905 00:47:21,239 --> 00:47:25,560 Speaker 1: I don't even know what today is. So that's great. Um, well, 906 00:47:25,840 --> 00:47:27,759 Speaker 1: I know we're working on a birthday celebration for you, 907 00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:30,439 Speaker 1: so we'll figure out something to do. But we're gonna 908 00:47:30,440 --> 00:47:32,120 Speaker 1: have to do it. And like we should all get 909 00:47:32,120 --> 00:47:35,120 Speaker 1: our own like bubble balls, like has mad suits. Yeah, 910 00:47:35,160 --> 00:47:38,520 Speaker 1: and just roll around. COVID birthdays are just a little lackluster, 911 00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:42,960 Speaker 1: but we'll do the best week. I mean, you're not cration. Yeah, 912 00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:44,520 Speaker 1: I thought about that too, But if I did a 913 00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:47,160 Speaker 1: sign up on like all of my social media, like 914 00:47:47,320 --> 00:47:51,399 Speaker 1: friends from afar, let's do the biggest birthday preaty ever 915 00:47:51,480 --> 00:47:53,200 Speaker 1: and like, see how many these people we can get 916 00:47:53,239 --> 00:47:54,919 Speaker 1: on and see what you can set up a fan wall. 917 00:47:55,239 --> 00:47:59,400 Speaker 1: All of a sudden, Ship were speaking of fans. We 918 00:47:59,440 --> 00:48:03,240 Speaker 1: still haven't done. I'm so upset. We suck. We haven't 919 00:48:03,040 --> 00:48:05,279 Speaker 1: done murt, we haven't set up our came yet. We 920 00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:07,520 Speaker 1: have an account. We just have to do our video. 921 00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:09,600 Speaker 1: I can't do today. I look like Ship. It was 922 00:48:09,640 --> 00:48:10,920 Speaker 1: the first time I've ever seen you with wet hair, 923 00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:14,120 Speaker 1: not at the pool. Rible. I cannot even till this 924 00:48:14,160 --> 00:48:16,680 Speaker 1: week has taken it out of my hair is green nail? Yeah, 925 00:48:16,760 --> 00:48:18,040 Speaker 1: Chip has green hair and we get a lot of 926 00:48:18,080 --> 00:48:20,560 Speaker 1: updates for you. Yes, Okay, this episode has been a 927 00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:23,640 Speaker 1: little shoreporg, but we're gonna go get back to c 928 00:48:23,840 --> 00:48:26,960 Speaker 1: M A weight here in Nashville and happy birthdaye schip 929 00:48:30,200 --> 00:48:32,400 Speaker 1: Um you guys email us at at casual at Velvet 930 00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:34,640 Speaker 1: edge dot com. I would love your feedback on the 931 00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:37,640 Speaker 1: porn and masturbation episode. I feel like that was trying 932 00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:39,560 Speaker 1: to answer a lot of y'all's questions, so let me 933 00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:41,080 Speaker 1: know if we hit the nail on the head or 934 00:48:41,120 --> 00:48:43,160 Speaker 1: if you have more. Um, you can also slide into 935 00:48:43,200 --> 00:48:45,319 Speaker 1: my d M s at Velvet Edge. Chip is at 936 00:48:45,440 --> 00:48:48,600 Speaker 1: Chip dorsh and we will keep you posted on our 937 00:48:48,640 --> 00:48:53,479 Speaker 1: cameo names, tv D t V D BT Um. What 938 00:48:53,880 --> 00:48:58,680 Speaker 1: the little couple of letters got jumbled at the end there? Um? 939 00:48:58,719 --> 00:49:00,799 Speaker 1: All right, Well you guys, have a great weekend, ship, 940 00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:05,640 Speaker 1: have a good birthday, and always remember act casual by 941 00:49:08,080 --> 00:49:08,440 Speaker 1: m HM