WEBVTT - #54 Let's Get it Together! 0:00:00.400 --> 0:00:04.400 Hell I Suck Good Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared 0:00:04.680 --> 0:00:09.119 and I Heart Radio Podcast. Hey everybody, and welcome to 0:00:09.119 --> 0:00:12.440 an all new episode of Help I Suck At Dating. 0:00:12.520 --> 0:00:17.119 I'm Jared have been joined always by Dean Haben. Have 0:00:17.239 --> 0:00:19.040 you got that? I don't think I've ever pronounced that properly? 0:00:19.640 --> 0:00:24.600 It's alright, Dean, tell the people who you are. Hey, everyone, 0:00:24.920 --> 0:00:28.280 I'm Dean, so welcome to the episode. Guys. We have 0:00:28.320 --> 0:00:31.280 a special guest that's on the phone right now. Her 0:00:31.360 --> 0:00:35.520 name is Lauren Burger. Lauren, Hello out there? Are you there? 0:00:36.040 --> 0:00:39.080 I'm here. Hi, guys, Hey Lauren, We're great. How are 0:00:39.120 --> 0:00:42.559 you good? Well? Thank you so much for joining us. 0:00:42.560 --> 0:00:45.760 I did pronounce your last name correctly, right? Burger Burger 0:00:46.240 --> 0:00:50.639 Burger perfect? Yeah, that's perfect. I thought of burgermeister from 0:00:50.680 --> 0:00:53.760 Santa Claus is coming to town? Anybody? And oh, I'm 0:00:53.800 --> 0:00:56.520 glad you got that reference Burger based meister Burger great well, 0:00:56.520 --> 0:01:03.120 Burger jokes aside, Lauren, tell us a little bit about yourself. Well, 0:01:03.160 --> 0:01:06.720 thanks for having me on the show. CEO and founder 0:01:06.840 --> 0:01:10.120 of a website called career Queen dot com and intern 0:01:10.240 --> 0:01:13.800 Queen dot Com. Both are free websites. That help people 0:01:13.880 --> 0:01:16.480 get from where they are to wherever they want to be. 0:01:16.959 --> 0:01:19.600 And my third book just came out today, which is 0:01:19.720 --> 0:01:23.680 very exciting. So it's called Get It Together, and it's 0:01:23.720 --> 0:01:26.720 all about it's all that how busy we are and 0:01:26.760 --> 0:01:29.080 how we all want to kind of disconnect and how 0:01:29.120 --> 0:01:31.319 we need to disconnect if we're ever going to be 0:01:31.440 --> 0:01:36.040 seeing people and just how to you know, work smarter 0:01:36.360 --> 0:01:38.600 and not harder. When when you say disconnect, what do 0:01:38.600 --> 0:01:41.160 you mean by that? Because we haven't had in the 0:01:41.160 --> 0:01:45.039 past someone who said she dropped her phone to better 0:01:45.040 --> 0:01:46.840 connect with the people around her. Is that kind of 0:01:46.840 --> 0:01:50.040 what you're talking to Yeah, yeah, exactly, And just you know, um, 0:01:50.080 --> 0:01:54.040 we're also anxious, We're also stressed, we're also overworked. You know, 0:01:54.160 --> 0:01:57.880 something that I started doing is I stopped scrolling Instagram 0:01:57.920 --> 0:02:00.920 before I go to sleep, Like when I go upstairs 0:02:00.920 --> 0:02:03.920 to go to bed, Instagram does not come, you know, 0:02:03.960 --> 0:02:06.280 And it's really kind of training yourself to not look 0:02:06.320 --> 0:02:07.920 at those things that are just going to kind of 0:02:08.560 --> 0:02:11.560 give you, you know, a little bit of anxiety, so 0:02:11.639 --> 0:02:13.600 not to get person. What do you do before you 0:02:13.600 --> 0:02:17.360 fall as? Do you read? Now? Um, I I read, 0:02:17.720 --> 0:02:21.640 I'll go to like shopping websites, because for me, that's 0:02:21.639 --> 0:02:23.880 relaxing and I'm not getting caught up in what other 0:02:23.960 --> 0:02:26.799 people are doing. But I've really found that disconnecting. I 0:02:26.840 --> 0:02:28.840 even I'm the CEO of a company. I've been running 0:02:28.840 --> 0:02:31.560 it for ten years. It's super successful. I took my 0:02:31.639 --> 0:02:33.799 email off my phone and I got a lot of 0:02:33.800 --> 0:02:36.480 guilt trips about it. But you know what, I'm okay, 0:02:36.880 --> 0:02:40.000 the business is okay, and I'm so much you know, 0:02:40.040 --> 0:02:42.640 I'm just better able to connect with the people around me. 0:02:42.720 --> 0:02:45.239 I'm more engaged with conversation. So I think it's really 0:02:45.240 --> 0:02:48.880 all about that disconnection. While while on the topic of anxiety, quickly, 0:02:49.120 --> 0:02:52.640 I've noticed myself before falling asleep, especially lately, maybe over 0:02:52.639 --> 0:02:55.600 the past six month or so, I'm getting incredibly anxious, 0:02:55.680 --> 0:02:58.120 especially when I'm watching a show that I've already watched before. 0:02:58.160 --> 0:02:59.720 Like if I was put on in the office, I'm okay, 0:03:00.000 --> 0:03:01.959 I'm not like benefiting anything from it, you know. And 0:03:02.000 --> 0:03:03.640 so it's like I'm sitting there and I'm like, what 0:03:03.680 --> 0:03:05.600 am I doing? Why am I doing this? Like I'm 0:03:05.639 --> 0:03:07.239 not dating anything from anything, and I would like you 0:03:07.440 --> 0:03:09.280 go to sleep anxious, and I most sometimes it makes 0:03:09.280 --> 0:03:11.120 me feel more comfortable when I'm watching a show that 0:03:11.160 --> 0:03:13.280 I know, well, that's before I go to bed, That's 0:03:13.320 --> 0:03:14.959 what I'm used to doing. Like I said, I've watched 0:03:15.000 --> 0:03:17.280 off as maybe like twenty times from trying to finish. 0:03:17.720 --> 0:03:19.520 But now I'm like, well, where is the utility in that? 0:03:19.600 --> 0:03:21.560 Like why I should be reading or you're doing something 0:03:21.560 --> 0:03:24.160 more constructive. I guess yeah, And I feel like it's 0:03:24.160 --> 0:03:25.839 about Like in the book, I talk a lot about 0:03:25.919 --> 0:03:28.520 knowing your need. That it's knowing what works for you. 0:03:28.520 --> 0:03:31.440 You know what makes you anxious, what doesn't, and then 0:03:31.560 --> 0:03:34.560 really you know, making sure that you follow that you 0:03:34.639 --> 0:03:37.680 follows through um on. You know, whatever is going to 0:03:37.760 --> 0:03:40.240 relax you and whatever's gonna help you disconnect. It's different 0:03:40.240 --> 0:03:42.720 for everybody. So would you say that disconnecting for you 0:03:42.920 --> 0:03:46.040 isn't necessarily getting off your phone or the internet, but 0:03:46.080 --> 0:03:50.520 it's more so getting off of social media. For me, 0:03:50.960 --> 0:03:53.360 disconnecting is getting off of social media. I don't want 0:03:53.400 --> 0:03:55.840 to look at who my boyfriend from high school is dating. 0:03:56.000 --> 0:03:57.960 I don't want to look at a competitor, you know, 0:03:58.040 --> 0:04:01.320 the other career coaches in the land. Um you know, 0:04:01.400 --> 0:04:04.480 I want to disconnect to a funny I did another 0:04:04.560 --> 0:04:08.000 podcast with a rav reality star and maybe you guys 0:04:08.000 --> 0:04:11.000 can relate to this because of the nature of your jobs. 0:04:11.240 --> 0:04:13.040 And I was telling her that for me, I can 0:04:13.080 --> 0:04:15.880 go to tmz dot com and that helps me disconnect, 0:04:16.240 --> 0:04:19.040 and she was like, not for me, that just makes 0:04:19.080 --> 0:04:21.000 me feel like I'm not cool enough and I should 0:04:21.040 --> 0:04:22.960 be going to the nice guy every night. So I 0:04:23.000 --> 0:04:25.280 don't know how you guys feel about that, but for me, 0:04:25.520 --> 0:04:28.359 you know, social media, I can I disconnect by not 0:04:28.440 --> 0:04:30.760 being on Instagram, but I can relax by going on 0:04:30.800 --> 0:04:35.240 like t m Z or some you know, celebrity gossip site. Um, 0:04:35.320 --> 0:04:38.080 so what got you started into this industry anyway? Because 0:04:38.080 --> 0:04:41.599 you're your big thing is about finding an internship and 0:04:41.640 --> 0:04:44.000 you have a YouTube successful YouTube channel about it, You've 0:04:44.040 --> 0:04:46.040 written three books. How did you even begin to start 0:04:46.040 --> 0:04:50.039 this process? Yeah? So I had fifteen internships when I 0:04:50.080 --> 0:04:55.680 was in college, which is kind of crazy. Yea. Yeah. 0:04:55.880 --> 0:04:58.960 I live in l A now also, and um when 0:04:58.960 --> 0:05:01.080 I was trying to find an internship, no one could 0:05:01.120 --> 0:05:03.400 help me, and I just wanted a better way and 0:05:03.440 --> 0:05:06.080 a better resource. So I started intern Queen with five 0:05:06.120 --> 0:05:09.800 thousand dollars of personal savings. I've never taken any investment 0:05:09.800 --> 0:05:12.240 money and you know, ten years later, not only do 0:05:12.320 --> 0:05:15.480 we have intern Queen Um, which helps people get internships 0:05:15.520 --> 0:05:18.719 and career advice, but we also launched the Career Queen Network. 0:05:20.320 --> 0:05:23.200 What's the Career Queen Network? So correct, I should have 0:05:23.240 --> 0:05:25.800 followed up with that. Career Queen is is kind of 0:05:25.839 --> 0:05:28.600 the six sister site to intern Queen. So now we 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:30.760 can help all of those young people that kind of 0:05:30.800 --> 0:05:33.480 grew up with intern Queen, we can help them connect 0:05:33.520 --> 0:05:35.760 with kind of the next step, which is that job. 0:05:35.880 --> 0:05:39.440 So it's uh, you know, free job advice. M I 0:05:39.520 --> 0:05:42.440 love that. No, that's really cool. Um, it's interesting too 0:05:42.480 --> 0:05:45.960 because obviously we're a dating podcast, and so from your 0:05:46.000 --> 0:05:49.360 perspective being very busy in the career world internships, I mean, 0:05:49.400 --> 0:05:52.760 you have fifteen internships during college. Um, if you don't 0:05:52.800 --> 0:05:57.120 mind me asking, are you you're married? Correct? I'm married, yes, 0:05:57.240 --> 0:06:00.400 and my husband's actually an entrepreneur, so that definitely helps. 0:06:01.080 --> 0:06:03.880 So how in your personal opinion do you balance work 0:06:04.000 --> 0:06:08.360 with relationships? Yeah, you know, I think it's about prioritizing 0:06:08.360 --> 0:06:11.840 and even for people that are driven by work like myself, 0:06:12.360 --> 0:06:14.200 I think and I talked about this in the book too. 0:06:14.240 --> 0:06:17.040 It's so important to put family and relationships first. And 0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:21.039 like I said, my husband Um runs the business, runs 0:06:21.080 --> 0:06:24.160 his own business as well, and so if we wanted to, 0:06:24.240 --> 0:06:26.920 we could both be on our phones all day, all night. 0:06:27.080 --> 0:06:29.000 But it's really a matter of saying, Okay, you know, 0:06:29.080 --> 0:06:32.240 this is disconnection time for us. It's when I get home. 0:06:33.000 --> 0:06:34.840 We always go for a walk. We hall it taken 0:06:34.839 --> 0:06:37.159 a loop around the neighborhood, and it's our time to 0:06:37.360 --> 0:06:40.080 leave our phones home and for an hour just kind 0:06:40.080 --> 0:06:42.920 of connect with each other. So I think it's about prioritizing, 0:06:43.360 --> 0:06:46.560 you know, a couple time and really taking that just 0:06:46.640 --> 0:06:49.640 as seriously as you were taking meeting for work. Well, 0:06:49.680 --> 0:06:52.280 I think to the stuff that you help others with, 0:06:52.800 --> 0:06:55.360 like curving anxiety, disconnecting, all that kind of stuff then 0:06:55.440 --> 0:06:58.920 plays into being a better partner and leads to more 0:06:58.920 --> 0:07:03.200 successful relationships at I would imagine it would. Yeah, absolutely, 0:07:03.279 --> 0:07:04.560 I mean, how are you going to meet a guy 0:07:04.600 --> 0:07:07.440 at a bar if you're sitting there scrolling on your phone? Right, Like, 0:07:07.520 --> 0:07:09.880 you have to be kind of present and you have 0:07:09.960 --> 0:07:12.560 to take in every experience and really kind of make 0:07:12.600 --> 0:07:14.560 the most of it. And then you know, it's funny, 0:07:14.600 --> 0:07:17.880 My intern queen message is put yourself out there and 0:07:17.960 --> 0:07:20.440 don't take no for an answer. And I feel like 0:07:20.760 --> 0:07:23.520 in the dating world, you know, I think that's important 0:07:23.520 --> 0:07:25.680 to you. Why I I don't. I believe in putting 0:07:25.680 --> 0:07:28.320 yourselves out there. I'm always telling my single friends, like, 0:07:28.560 --> 0:07:30.320 you know, go up to your go up to that guy, 0:07:30.440 --> 0:07:33.000 introduce yourself, Like what's the worst that can happen? He's 0:07:33.000 --> 0:07:35.400 gonna say no, who cares? You know, then he's not 0:07:35.440 --> 0:07:38.040 the right guy anyway. So I'm all about just putting 0:07:38.080 --> 0:07:41.040 yourself out there and really not following too many rules 0:07:41.040 --> 0:07:43.160 while dating. I mean I certainly did not play it 0:07:43.160 --> 0:07:49.000 cool at all when I met my husband. Cool. I mean, 0:07:49.040 --> 0:07:53.640 I'm just not cool, sound awesome. I mean, you know, 0:07:53.680 --> 0:07:55.680 you're not supposed to. Most of my friends if they 0:07:55.720 --> 0:07:58.000 meet a guy, like, they won't tax, they won't call. 0:07:58.120 --> 0:08:00.760 I was texting and callative NonStop. Up. I think I 0:08:00.800 --> 0:08:03.080 asked him to take me. I was like, hey, after 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:05.240 like our second day, it was like, I'm flying back 0:08:05.240 --> 0:08:06.880 into l a X. You should really take me up 0:08:06.920 --> 0:08:09.800 from the airport. You know. I really didn't wait for 0:08:09.880 --> 0:08:12.600 him to make the move. I knew what I wanted 0:08:12.640 --> 0:08:16.240 and I didn't want to pause for her game thing. 0:08:16.320 --> 0:08:18.120 I guess, so I just kind of went for it. 0:08:18.200 --> 0:08:20.640 I respect that. I respect that a lot. And you 0:08:20.760 --> 0:08:22.840 just put yourself up there, your very forward. It's not 0:08:22.880 --> 0:08:26.520 going to work out right when someone's obviously got to 0:08:26.560 --> 0:08:27.640 kind of get the ball role and with all that 0:08:27.680 --> 0:08:30.240 kind of stuff as well. So quick question in your 0:08:30.280 --> 0:08:31.800 book this, I believe it's this new one that came 0:08:31.840 --> 0:08:34.920 out right, there's a steam guiding principles did you have 0:08:35.000 --> 0:08:38.000 in there that you've outline right? Yep? So could you 0:08:38.000 --> 0:08:39.840 give us like a quick maybe top three of the 0:08:39.880 --> 0:08:42.880 seventeen guiding principles that you want to share with the listeners? Yeah? 0:08:42.960 --> 0:08:44.720 I think you know. One of my favorite ones is 0:08:44.760 --> 0:08:48.040 do things based on your method, not your mood. A 0:08:48.160 --> 0:08:51.240 simple example of this is, you know, you say you're 0:08:51.240 --> 0:08:53.319 not going to go to the gym. A friend said 0:08:53.360 --> 0:08:55.240 to me last night, like, do you want to go 0:08:55.320 --> 0:08:57.480 to the gym tomorrow or are you gonna be too tired? 0:08:57.559 --> 0:08:59.360 I'm like no, no, no, Like, the plan is to 0:08:59.400 --> 0:09:01.080 go to the gym. We're not going to roll on 0:09:01.160 --> 0:09:03.719 my mood, which would be being tired. You know, we're 0:09:03.720 --> 0:09:05.520 gonna go. We're gonna stick to the script here and 0:09:05.520 --> 0:09:07.080 the and the script said, I want to go to 0:09:07.080 --> 0:09:10.000 the gym. So do things based on your method and 0:09:10.040 --> 0:09:12.800 not your mood. Your mood doesn't matter, you know. You 0:09:12.880 --> 0:09:15.160 really got to stick to the script and you know, 0:09:15.200 --> 0:09:17.520 stick to your plan. And the same advice goes towards 0:09:17.559 --> 0:09:19.920 if you're having a bad day. Two weeks ago, I 0:09:19.960 --> 0:09:22.400 had two of my employees quit out of nowhere. It 0:09:22.480 --> 0:09:25.320 was a terrible day. But if I let that throw 0:09:25.400 --> 0:09:28.000 my whole day, I wouldn't have gotten anything done. So 0:09:28.040 --> 0:09:30.160 when that happened, I stuck to the script and I 0:09:30.200 --> 0:09:32.800 followed through in my original schedule for the day, and 0:09:32.840 --> 0:09:36.000 I just got I got things done, you know. So 0:09:36.120 --> 0:09:38.600 I think that one of the most important pieces of 0:09:38.600 --> 0:09:40.840 the of advice in the book is I talked about 0:09:40.880 --> 0:09:43.920 that a lot um. The other is embracing rejection. I 0:09:43.960 --> 0:09:47.440 started my business with five thousand dollars. It's doing really well. 0:09:47.520 --> 0:09:49.520 And if I would have let the nose or the 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:53.160 rejection stop me, I wouldn't be anywhere. So I always say, like, 0:09:53.400 --> 0:09:57.199 get married to rejection, you know, embrace rejection, Love rejection, 0:09:57.240 --> 0:09:59.200 because it really helps me get from where I was 0:09:59.280 --> 0:10:01.000 to where I am today. Do you have a secret 0:10:01.040 --> 0:10:04.600 to everybody listening on how to better handle rejection, because 0:10:04.640 --> 0:10:07.880 I think for me personally, it's really tough being told no, no, no, 0:10:08.040 --> 0:10:10.920 and then keep really being persistent and moving forward. Do 0:10:10.960 --> 0:10:12.240 you have any type of secret that you can tell 0:10:12.280 --> 0:10:14.760 everybody be like, listen, this is how you can accept 0:10:14.840 --> 0:10:17.199 and move on with rejection. We should get Ashley to 0:10:17.280 --> 0:10:23.320 come and speak to that. One thing that I really 0:10:23.480 --> 0:10:25.240 like doing. And maybe this is kind of a tip, 0:10:25.800 --> 0:10:28.680 is whoever rejects you, whether it's you know which, maybe 0:10:28.679 --> 0:10:32.760 you're going after a job or um, you're pitching your opportunity. 0:10:33.080 --> 0:10:36.079 When that person rejects you, friend that person on LinkedIn, 0:10:36.280 --> 0:10:38.520 become their best friend and stay in touch with them 0:10:38.640 --> 0:10:41.800 three times a year. Turn that no into a yes. 0:10:41.880 --> 0:10:43.400 And I'm telling you I've been doing this for over 0:10:43.480 --> 0:10:46.800 ten years, and there are so many deals that I get, 0:10:46.840 --> 0:10:48.920 so many cool brands that I work with, and I've 0:10:48.920 --> 0:10:51.640 been after those people for three years, you know, and 0:10:51.679 --> 0:10:53.480 they've been saying no for years. But I turned that 0:10:53.559 --> 0:10:57.240 no into a yes simply by staying in touch. So 0:10:57.360 --> 0:11:00.360 I really think that um, you know, taking it manage 0:11:00.360 --> 0:11:02.480 of those contacts that you're getting, even the people that 0:11:02.520 --> 0:11:04.720 are saying no can really help. I think that was 0:11:04.760 --> 0:11:07.800 so before, maybe a couple of years ago, I was 0:11:07.880 --> 0:11:11.079 in a sales role at a staffing agency, and in 0:11:11.160 --> 0:11:13.840 those sales roles, you are constantly being told no, and 0:11:13.880 --> 0:11:15.880 I just think my psyche was unable to handle it. 0:11:15.880 --> 0:11:17.160 Got to the point where I was like, you know, 0:11:17.160 --> 0:11:18.600 you talked to a hundred people a day and all 0:11:18.679 --> 0:11:20.120 hundred people say no, But then the next day, like 0:11:20.160 --> 0:11:22.000 nine people will say no, one will say yes. I 0:11:22.080 --> 0:11:23.959 just like I wasn't really able to get past that 0:11:23.960 --> 0:11:26.760 that roadblock for me personally. So I wish I had 0:11:26.760 --> 0:11:30.640 a book like yours to read when I was Yeah, 0:11:30.640 --> 0:11:32.120 and it's funny you say that I have a whole 0:11:32.640 --> 0:11:35.880 chapter about refining your goals, and I talked about exactly that, 0:11:35.920 --> 0:11:38.160 which is for me. I like to know the numbers 0:11:38.240 --> 0:11:40.480 like and this might sound a little crazy, but as 0:11:40.559 --> 0:11:43.120 a as a businesswoman, I know that if I spend 0:11:43.160 --> 0:11:46.280 a hundred cold pitch emails, I'm probably going to get 0:11:46.320 --> 0:11:48.760 about ten responses. I'm probably going to get on the 0:11:48.800 --> 0:11:51.280 phone with five of those people. I'm going to close 0:11:51.360 --> 0:11:54.520 one deal. And the power of knowing your numbers is 0:11:54.559 --> 0:11:56.760 really big because then you don't have to get caught 0:11:56.800 --> 0:11:58.600 up in the nose. You already expect them, you know 0:11:58.679 --> 0:12:01.880 they're going to happen. Yeah, it's very true. Yeah, I 0:12:01.880 --> 0:12:03.920 think that that same logic can apply to dating, as 0:12:03.960 --> 0:12:05.840 Jared was saying too, just because well and same with 0:12:05.840 --> 0:12:07.920 how you met your husband. Obviously, you've got to be persistent, 0:12:08.160 --> 0:12:10.600 especially if you know it's something and someone that you want. 0:12:11.200 --> 0:12:13.160 And I can go a long way, especially in today's 0:12:13.240 --> 0:12:19.120 landscape and and dating world, I feel like, yeah, absolutely, yeah, agreed, Lauren, 0:12:19.120 --> 0:12:20.560 thank you so much for joining us today. We really 0:12:20.600 --> 0:12:24.840 appreciate it. So please tell everybody where they can find you. Yeah, absolutely, Well, 0:12:24.840 --> 0:12:27.320 you guys can follow me at Official Career Queen and 0:12:27.440 --> 0:12:29.920 at Internal Queen. I'm gonna send you guys messages after 0:12:29.960 --> 0:12:32.480 this and then Get It Together is out today, so 0:12:32.520 --> 0:12:34.520 you guys can get it on Amazon, at Barnes and Noble, 0:12:34.520 --> 0:12:37.280 atok Milion or anymore work books are sold. Great, We'll 0:12:37.280 --> 0:12:39.240 make sure everybody pick up a copy today. Get It Together. 0:12:39.280 --> 0:12:41.600 We should have you jump on Ben's podcast Lady Bosses. 0:12:41.640 --> 0:12:45.319 I feel like they'd be Yeah, definitely, I would love doing. 0:12:45.320 --> 0:12:47.960 I'm a huge Bachelor fan, So I love to you guys, 0:12:47.960 --> 0:12:50.440 and you guys are coming at Lauren. Thank you so much. 0:12:50.480 --> 0:12:52.160 We appreciate it. Thank you again for calling in, Lauren. 0:12:52.200 --> 0:12:53.880 It's it's great to hear you're doing great. Talk to 0:12:53.880 --> 0:12:58.440 you soon. All right, Thanks Lauren. Well, she was very sweet. 0:12:58.440 --> 0:12:59.640 That was very nice. I think a lot of that 0:12:59.720 --> 0:13:02.000 lodge that she obviously is more of a business centric 0:13:02.520 --> 0:13:04.400 minded person, but I think a lot of that logic 0:13:04.440 --> 0:13:06.600 can apply to dating as well. Oh, I agree the 0:13:06.600 --> 0:13:09.560 the idea of failing but then trying to still be 0:13:09.600 --> 0:13:12.360 persistent because everybody, like how many times you've been we've 0:13:12.360 --> 0:13:15.920 had messages about people being rejected or dates not working out, 0:13:16.080 --> 0:13:18.400 and they just feel so deflated they never want to 0:13:18.400 --> 0:13:20.840 go on another date again. But here's a woman who's saying, no, 0:13:21.080 --> 0:13:23.440 what you need to do is just keep pushing and 0:13:23.559 --> 0:13:26.000 accept the know and accept the rejection, but understand that 0:13:26.040 --> 0:13:28.720 it will get better and just to keep pushing forward. 0:13:29.200 --> 0:13:31.040 That's a good message. It's like when my body tells 0:13:31.080 --> 0:13:34.200 my tells my head to work out. Yeah, it's like 0:13:34.200 --> 0:13:35.760 when I look in the mirror every day and I'm like, 0:13:35.800 --> 0:13:37.160 you know what, it's just not worth going to the 0:13:37.160 --> 0:13:39.200 gym because I'm not gonna because you just don't want 0:13:39.200 --> 0:13:41.960 to drive to the gym that and I just I'm like, 0:13:42.000 --> 0:13:43.640 you know what, I'm not going to see any results, 0:13:43.640 --> 0:13:45.680 but you just gotta push through that. It's the method, 0:13:45.679 --> 0:13:48.120 not the mood. Jared in one way to develop the 0:13:48.120 --> 0:13:51.480 best method. As far as I'm concerned, beach Body on Demand, 0:13:51.880 --> 0:13:55.079 I completely agree. I love beach Body on Demand. You've 0:13:55.080 --> 0:13:56.840 heard us talk about it before, You'll hear us talk 0:13:56.880 --> 0:13:58.640 about it again. You're gonna hear us talk about it 0:13:58.720 --> 0:14:01.320 right now a little bit more. It's an easy on 0:14:01.480 --> 0:14:04.240 demand streaming service that gives you instant access to a 0:14:04.240 --> 0:14:06.200 wide variety of super effective workouts you can do from 0:14:06.240 --> 0:14:07.960 the comfort of your living room. I think that's what 0:14:08.000 --> 0:14:09.199 Jared and I love most about is you don't have 0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:10.560 to go to the gym. You can basically just do 0:14:10.640 --> 0:14:12.800 any workout in a short amount of time at your 0:14:12.800 --> 0:14:15.600 house ten twenty minutes, however, however long. You have hundreds 0:14:15.600 --> 0:14:18.080 of effective workouts for all fitness levels, ranging from booty 0:14:18.080 --> 0:14:21.080 building to weight training, to cardio the hit the high 0:14:21.120 --> 0:14:23.840 intensity interval training, to yoga and even dance workouts. Again, 0:14:23.880 --> 0:14:26.880 my favorite is hip hop abs dafects. I'm gonna be 0:14:26.880 --> 0:14:29.360 perfectly honest with you, guys. I've been slacking a little 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:31.440 bit and I'm getting a little dully around this the 0:14:31.480 --> 0:14:33.600 mid region. I'm not doing my hip hop abs as 0:14:33.640 --> 0:14:35.640 much as I should be, but I'm gonna get back 0:14:35.680 --> 0:14:37.160 to it. I'm kind of glad that winter is coming 0:14:37.240 --> 0:14:38.600 up because I'm gonna be wearing my shirt a lot 0:14:38.640 --> 0:14:40.680 more than obviously in the summertime here in Los Angeles. 0:14:41.240 --> 0:14:42.920 The nice thing about Beach Body on Demand you can 0:14:42.920 --> 0:14:48.120 access it anywhere, anytime. If you want your computer, web enabled, TV, tablet, smartphone, Roku, 0:14:48.200 --> 0:14:50.800 Apple TV, Chrome Cast, basically any way you can get 0:14:50.800 --> 0:14:52.560 on the Internet, you can get on Beach Body on Demand. 0:14:52.840 --> 0:14:55.360 Best deal in fitness, especially for the listeners. Help I 0:14:55.400 --> 0:14:58.240 suck at dating, You guys can try absolutely free. All 0:14:58.240 --> 0:15:00.120 you have to do is text Dean to third D 0:15:00.240 --> 0:15:02.880 thirty thirty. That's d E A ND two three zero 0:15:02.920 --> 0:15:06.600 three zero three zero. You get a special free child membership, 0:15:06.600 --> 0:15:09.400 including their new fourteen day result plan where you can 0:15:09.400 --> 0:15:12.200 lose up to nine pounds in the first two weeks 0:15:12.400 --> 0:15:15.320 when you use my code, our code Dean d e 0:15:15.400 --> 0:15:17.920 A n to to jump in on that. I think 0:15:18.000 --> 0:15:20.440 that's a really cool factor because what happens when you 0:15:20.480 --> 0:15:21.880 go to the gym after two weeks and you don't 0:15:21.960 --> 0:15:24.360 see results. You just bummed out. You get bummed out right, 0:15:24.360 --> 0:15:26.040 you don't want to go back. They're saying you can 0:15:26.080 --> 0:15:28.200 lose nine pounds in the first two weeks. You get 0:15:28.200 --> 0:15:31.200 to see results in fourteen days. Guys, just make sure 0:15:31.240 --> 0:15:33.280 you couple it with healthy eating and beach Body on 0:15:33.320 --> 0:15:35.800 Demand will be able to help you plan your meals 0:15:36.720 --> 0:15:39.120 basically outline the nutritional value, everything that you need to 0:15:39.160 --> 0:15:41.560 reach your rate lost goals. So again, you'll get full 0:15:41.560 --> 0:15:44.000 access to the entire platform for free, all the workouts 0:15:44.000 --> 0:15:47.040 and nutrition information, the results plan to get you super 0:15:47.040 --> 0:15:50.520 fast results and support totally for free. All you have 0:15:50.560 --> 0:15:52.920 to do is text d e A N to three 0:15:52.960 --> 0:15:56.720 zero three zero three zero. That's Dean to thirty thirty thirty. 0:15:57.040 --> 0:15:59.040 Be sure to try beach Body on Demand. Like I said, 0:15:59.040 --> 0:16:01.480 I gotta get back into get my apps back in shape. 0:16:01.520 --> 0:16:03.280 I was actually looking through old pictures of like when 0:16:03.320 --> 0:16:05.600 I was traveling, because I was just in Mexico with 0:16:05.600 --> 0:16:07.680 with my buddy Courtney, and I posted a picture and 0:16:07.720 --> 0:16:10.880 everyone was like, Okay, dad, bod weird flex whatever it is, 0:16:11.920 --> 0:16:13.480 And so I was like going through my old pictures. 0:16:13.520 --> 0:16:15.560 I was like, I should probably post a picture from 0:16:15.600 --> 0:16:18.280 when I was doing Beach Body on Demand to remind 0:16:18.560 --> 0:16:21.480 myself that I can sometimes have hip hop app Dean, 0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:24.160 you do not have a dead bod whatso ever. But 0:16:24.280 --> 0:16:26.000 sometimes I do that too. I'll look at old pictures 0:16:26.000 --> 0:16:29.760 of myself and just I'll, i'll, i'll fat shame myself. 0:16:29.800 --> 0:16:31.520 I'm like, you, you piece of crap. You need to 0:16:31.520 --> 0:16:33.040 get back in the gym. Look at you look so 0:16:33.120 --> 0:16:35.160 much better then, and look at you now. Look how 0:16:35.200 --> 0:16:38.120 horrible you look now? Exactly? You have beautiful fiance. You 0:16:38.160 --> 0:16:40.680 need to get your ass back in the gym. Can 0:16:40.720 --> 0:16:42.280 we get a time? Can we give an ness on 0:16:42.320 --> 0:16:46.080 the phone. I miss hearing her voice. Let's let's get her. 0:16:46.800 --> 0:16:48.160 Let's get her on the phone and get her on 0:16:48.160 --> 0:16:50.200 the phone. If you haven't listened to last week's episode, 0:16:52.640 --> 0:16:54.920 I'm just talking to everyone in the studio right now, 0:16:54.920 --> 0:16:58.600 not the listeners, per se. Okay, so continue listen to 0:16:58.680 --> 0:17:01.800 last week's episode of The Finessic Maldi. Her good friend 0:17:01.920 --> 0:17:06.399 Brandy Cyrus joined her as a co host. Oh look 0:17:07.480 --> 0:17:12.439 what the cat dragged in? Um, I missed you guys. 0:17:12.560 --> 0:17:13.800 We want to do you more? Do you want to 0:17:13.800 --> 0:17:16.760 do FaceTime audio or is this okay? We can't do 0:17:16.800 --> 0:17:21.280 FaceTime audio, so we're gonna do it this way. What's up, Vanessa? Uh? 0:17:21.320 --> 0:17:23.520 Not much. I was waiting for you guys to call 0:17:23.560 --> 0:17:27.800 me listen. Full disclosure. I don't care anymore. Vanessa Texas 0:17:27.840 --> 0:17:30.160 dan And said, don't have them coming right now. I'm pooping. 0:17:30.560 --> 0:17:33.919 So the question is, Vanessa, are you still pooping? No? 0:17:34.080 --> 0:17:37.720 I washed my hand and sitting on my shower now 0:17:37.720 --> 0:17:39.600 in my kitchens that we're good. Yeah, it's okay. We 0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:42.800 all pumped out. I loved it, loved it. So, Vanessa, 0:17:43.320 --> 0:17:46.560 you had a solo podcast last week that um I 0:17:46.640 --> 0:17:48.800 did you listen to? And just can you give, like 0:17:48.840 --> 0:17:52.080 everybody a brief summary of what you talked about. Yeah, so, 0:17:52.240 --> 0:17:55.359 first of all, I keep messaging well, I keep putting 0:17:55.359 --> 0:17:57.360 it out there. All the thank you for people who 0:17:57.400 --> 0:18:01.520 have been listening, who did listen to week's episode. Brandy 0:18:01.600 --> 0:18:05.359 Cyrus was on l through the mendep even had Dr 0:18:05.480 --> 0:18:10.679 Jennifer um who basically told me, then the next six months, 0:18:11.000 --> 0:18:14.560 I'm going to detox from everything. And I remember what 0:18:14.680 --> 0:18:17.400 she said about like the last thirty years, like something 0:18:17.440 --> 0:18:20.600 about the moon and the stars or something. Anyway, we're 0:18:20.600 --> 0:18:22.880 moving into the year at the age of Scorpio or something. 0:18:22.920 --> 0:18:26.959 Isn't that right right now? Yeah? Something that Um, everything 0:18:27.000 --> 0:18:30.399 that I've learned the last thirty years, I've learned, I've 0:18:30.480 --> 0:18:33.280 I've grown from it, and now I'm you know, I'm 0:18:33.440 --> 0:18:36.120 I'm going to move on into like bigger and better things. 0:18:36.119 --> 0:18:38.240 So it was like a really great I guess the 0:18:38.359 --> 0:18:41.040