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Speaker 1: Yay, I'm back. I feel like I've been doing a

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Speaker 1: lot of Tripolitely.

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Speaker 2: Tell me about it.

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Speaker 1: So well, first, hey ba listeners, how you are, how

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Speaker 1: you been? If you're new, welcome, full up a seat. Well,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, you know, I just got back to

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Speaker 1: Australia and then I went to Arizona for a special

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Speaker 1: gathering of West Africans West African Vultron.

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Speaker 2: To be fully correct, I thought I felt an electric

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Speaker 2: current go through the universe this weekend and I was like,

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Speaker 2: what's happening? And then I saw your Instagram and I

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Speaker 2: was like, oh, it's the future power of Nigerian Americans

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Speaker 2: in the Grand Canyon and wherever the hell you guys were.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we were in Sedona and Phoenix. So it was Nigerians,

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Speaker 1: well Nigerians Ganans. I think it's someone who's Cameroonian. So

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Speaker 1: just being a group of dope with that, you said,

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Speaker 1: who was Cameronian?

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Speaker 2: Now I said, ooh, I've never met anyone from Cameroon. Cameroon.

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Speaker 2: I had to think backwards, like.

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Speaker 1: What a Cameroonian be called? Yeah, So honestly the group

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Speaker 1: started because I believe so a friend of mine, Lovey

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Speaker 1: from awesomely lovey. Many of you probably know her to

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Speaker 1: the New York Times best seller blogger and just all

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Speaker 1: around badass.

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Speaker 2: Did she get her sticker?

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Speaker 1: She did, you know, yeah, and I'm so glad she

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Speaker 1: made that fuss because she got the sticker and the

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Speaker 1: new her book I'm Judging You, which is a New

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Speaker 1: York Times bestseller. Again she it's in hard dack now,

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Speaker 1: so it's available like wherever books are sold. Oh are

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Speaker 1: you kidding? Men?

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Speaker 2: She did the reverse, so she started out paperback and

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Speaker 2: then went hardcover. Yeh, tristan cool.

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure why, like how that works, but yeah.

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Speaker 1: So she we apparently went to our guess met a

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Speaker 1: whole bunch of dope folks at like some event a

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Speaker 1: couple years back, and they stayed connected because there were

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Speaker 1: the few brown people that were there and they all

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Speaker 1: happened to be West African and some exclusive like you know,

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Speaker 1: like conference or something like invite only conference, and she

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Speaker 1: was like, you know, we should all connect, and then

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Speaker 1: they did and they started kind of inviting their friends

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Speaker 1: in so Lovely actually invited me, and then the other

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Speaker 1: folks who she was at that conference with started inviting

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Speaker 1: their friends, and before you knew it, know it. We

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Speaker 1: started kind of like a chat like WhatsApp, and before

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Speaker 1: it was just kind of like, you know, just group chat.

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Speaker 1: But now it's really starting to evolve. And so I'm

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Speaker 1: excited because but I didn't really know what half the

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Speaker 1: people did. I just knew that they seemed fun and dope,

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Speaker 1: and you know, I think I had done an initial

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Speaker 1: Google search, you know, on some of them, like oh,

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Speaker 1: well who's that, Oh who's that? Oh wow? And then

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Speaker 1: after a while I was like I just stopped. I'm like, ah,

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Speaker 1: they just started cool in the group been So, you know,

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Speaker 1: we a few months back, someone was like, we should

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Speaker 1: really I think, you know, there was we all met

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Speaker 1: up at essence Fest, or like a large chunk of

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Speaker 1: us were either speaking or participating in somewhere at essence Fest,

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Speaker 1: and so we all had like lunch and we all

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Speaker 1: went to like concert and backstage and we just had

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Speaker 1: a really good time together. And we started thinking like

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Speaker 1: we should really make this a deeper connection. And so

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Speaker 1: three of the young women from the group, Opal Funa

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Speaker 1: and Justina, they they put together this Wave Summit and

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Speaker 1: it was dope. The house was amazing, I mean, like

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Speaker 1: MTV cribs amazing. Even people who were like in the

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Speaker 1: group who's who run in circles with fancy folks, were like, whoa,

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Speaker 1: this house was amazing. It was so amazing. I didn't

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Speaker 1: even feel comfortable. I was like, what is this? This

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Speaker 1: is like a set, you know. And so it was

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Speaker 1: beautiful and it was set right in the mountains, so

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Speaker 1: you could see all the red mountains and and we

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Speaker 1: spent a lot of time just like talking to getting

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Speaker 1: getting to know one another and figuring out how we

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Speaker 1: can help each other, and just like hanging out and connecting. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: it was really dope's It's crazy to be among high

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Speaker 1: achievers and to see what that looks like mixed with

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Speaker 1: different personalities, you know, because everyone here is like a

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Speaker 1: super high achiever. Honestly, I kept thinking to myself, why

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Speaker 1: am I here? I feel like a freshman for all

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Speaker 1: these seniors, you know. And that was nice too. It

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Speaker 1: was nice to kind of just sit back in awe

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Speaker 1: and just be like, what, She's the one who made

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Speaker 1: what her business is doing, what this one is doing? What?

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Speaker 1: You know? So I just kept being like.

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Speaker 2: What so y'all like, oh, sorry, y'all, Like so basically

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Speaker 2: it's like a group trip you rent to like an

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Speaker 2: Airbnb or like a house.

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Speaker 1: Yeah it was an Airbnb, but it was a super face. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so just to like get to know each other and

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Speaker 1: figure out what do we want to do with this,

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Speaker 1: like you know, this tremendous power we have you know, No,

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Speaker 1: I'm just but yeah, so it was Honestly, it was

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Speaker 1: really awesome. But yeah, I learned some really great lessons

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Speaker 1: just about balance and harmony and that I used to

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Speaker 1: always think, like, well, once I get to a certain level,

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Speaker 1: certain I won't have certain issues anymore, like certain like

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Speaker 1: I'll figure out balance and I'll figure out how to

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Speaker 1: make everything work and I won't still be worried about

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Speaker 1: messing up. And yeah, that's not true. It's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: like so just to see what it looked like from

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Speaker 1: I don't want to say at the top, because everybody's

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Speaker 1: still striving, but to kind of see what it looked

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Speaker 1: like from like to me extreme achievement and to see

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Speaker 1: like to learn that I have to learn how to

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Speaker 1: manage the emotion of expectation and not getting everything I

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Speaker 1: want or whatever now because just because I achieved more,

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Speaker 1: that those feelings don't go away. So to see it

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Speaker 1: in folks like that, like, no, you just better figure

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Speaker 1: out how to manage it now, because that the more

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Speaker 1: you achieve, the more you want to achieve, and the

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Speaker 1: more you're going to mess up, and the more you're

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Speaker 1: going to be unsure. Certain things that net never really

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Speaker 1: goes away. It's just human. So it was really nice

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Speaker 1: to see that. I was, like I was telling Drina.

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Speaker 1: She didn't come with me, but I was just telling

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Speaker 1: when I got home, like we need some more like

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Speaker 1: real life, in person friends. Not to say the waves

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Speaker 1: are not my friends, but you know what I mean,

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Speaker 1: like the folks that you connect to regularly, like you

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Speaker 1: know that aside from us who are growing a business,

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Speaker 1: because it's a weird space because you don't know sometimes

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Speaker 1: how you're doing, you know what I mean. Like when

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Speaker 1: I had a job, you know, and I was a teacher,

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Speaker 1: it was clear there were these clear markers of like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: the kids can read, and I'm here on time, and

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Speaker 1: my left the plants are done. But when you work

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Speaker 1: for yourself, sometimes I'm like out here floating and I

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Speaker 1: don't know how I'm doing. Honestly, I'm like, am I

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Speaker 1: doing good? I don't know? I mean because money is

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Speaker 1: not is not a good enough like measuring stick, because

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Speaker 1: sometimes you will randomly make money and you're like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I didn't that was a mistake, but okay, you know,

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Speaker 1: and so and sometimes too, you know, you will be

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Speaker 1: busting your behind and it won't work. So it's like

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Speaker 1: it's the feedback for you know, when you're an actual

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Speaker 1: or sometimes it's difficult to gauge where am I and

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Speaker 1: how am I doing? And because you can get so

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Speaker 1: much in the weeds that you feel like, am I

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Speaker 1: doing well? You know, because I don't know what it

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Speaker 1: looks like from the outside, and even still just because

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Speaker 1: it looks good from the outside doesn't mean it's really

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Speaker 1: good on the inside. So it was just nice to

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Speaker 1: kind of like look at like, you know, it's almost

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Speaker 1: like it was like looking in like in ad mirror,

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Speaker 1: even if it was an advanced mirror of like, oh okay,

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Speaker 1: so you know, I can kind of see what it

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Speaker 1: looks like and kind of like what my my markers

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Speaker 1: and my goals are, you know. Yeah, so that was

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Speaker 1: cool about it. So when you do this weekend, I

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Speaker 1: saw you in that pool.

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Speaker 2: Oh I had some self care took care of maybe

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Speaker 2: this weekend that place was amazing. Yeah, my friends are

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Speaker 2: so nice and there's just massive, like just I don't

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Speaker 2: know this huge spa type facility that I passed. I

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Speaker 2: just drove by it one day in Jersey and Edgewater

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Speaker 2: if you're familiar with that area, and I was like,

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Speaker 2: I want to see what's in there. And I mentioned

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Speaker 2: it in passing one of my girlfriends. And then from

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Speaker 2: my birthday, a bunch of my my little group of

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Speaker 2: friends got together and got me a gift card and

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Speaker 2: it just kind of like sat forever, and finally this weekend,

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Speaker 2: I was like, I'm going and it was magical, Like

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Speaker 2: I mean when you talk about spending money on an

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Speaker 2: experience where you feel like that was worth all the pennies.

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Speaker 2: It was only seventy five. It was seventy five dollars,

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Speaker 2: but you get access to just endless rooms of different

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Speaker 2: like saunas and hot tubs and cold pools and warm

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Speaker 2: pools and pools outside and pools inside and comfy chairs

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Speaker 2: you can just recline in and look at the view

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Speaker 2: and I mean, like, what is the name.

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Speaker 1: Of the spot? And how far work in Jersey City.

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Speaker 2: It's only it's like a thirty minute twenty thirty minute

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Speaker 2: drive from Jersey City. Yeah, you have you have to go.

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Speaker 2: You have to go. Take a friend. I just want whether,

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Speaker 2: I just want a good My best my best girlfriend

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Speaker 2: who she like runs, she loves the spa, and she

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Speaker 2: took me one time to like one of those janky

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Speaker 2: bath houses in the city in Manhattan, and I was like,

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Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm ever coming back here, like

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Speaker 2: cause it's like in the basement and it's you know,

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Speaker 2: it's New York, so you can't fit a big spa,

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Speaker 2: so they're like they're leaking and you don't know where

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Speaker 2: all the web the water is coming from. And you're

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Speaker 2: like there's Randos, you know, sitting in the spa next

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Speaker 2: to you, and the sauna next to you. And I

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Speaker 2: wasn't sure if I was ever going to go back.

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Speaker 2: But this place was like spectacular, so clean. The women

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Speaker 2: and men are separate for the in the like the

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Speaker 2: pools and saunas area, and then there's like a communal

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Speaker 2: area and then there's there's like four different levels and

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Speaker 2: they have restaurant, they have a smoothie bar.

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Speaker 1: And I think this place, like it.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like something Correll will do, will do.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he's very fancy.

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Speaker 2: You can, so like you get like the day pass

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Speaker 2: what we did. Day pass just gets you access to

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Speaker 2: all the spas a Sonnets whatever. But if you want

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Speaker 2: like special treatments, that's extra, like massages and things like that.

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Speaker 2: But those looked amazing. But it was just such a

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Speaker 2: nice day and I had a I had like a

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Speaker 2: really busy weekend and I don't know, I just it

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Speaker 2: was it was awesome. Would four stars will go back?

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Speaker 2: So Joe spot Club, if you're listening, you know, give

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Speaker 2: me a discount next time. Yeah, it was awesome. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it was really nice weekend. And uh, I don't know

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Speaker 2: about I don't know about you, but before the holidays,

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Speaker 2: I feel like work gets more and more intense because

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Speaker 2: I feel like I was working this weekend because I

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Speaker 2: wanted to get ahead of the short week and I'm

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Speaker 2: just like I feel like I am skidding across the

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Speaker 2: finish line. Just I'm just I feel like I'm not

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Speaker 2: going to relax until I get on the flight to

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Speaker 2: Atlanta tomorrow night. I'm just gonna like power through these

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Speaker 2: next two days. But I am ready because I cannot

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Speaker 2: wait for my dad's cornbread stuffing. I haven't I can't wait.

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Speaker 2: This is my first time back in Atlanta for Thanksgiving

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Speaker 2: in like nine years. I think. I don't think I've

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Speaker 2: been back since college. Yeah, it's been a long time.

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Speaker 1: Like in general Atlanta or you mean just for the holidays.

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Speaker 2: Boy, for the specific Thanksgiving holiday, yeah, which is my

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Speaker 2: favorite food holiday. I'm like, I've gone back the week

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Speaker 2: before and like two weeks later, but I haven't been

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Speaker 2: back on the actual holiday since college.

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Speaker 1: So my mom just texting yesterday was like, so, yeah, Thanksgiving,

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Speaker 1: I'm not cooking.

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Speaker 2: I was like, wait, what it's canceled?

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Speaker 1: I was like wait what? She was like, meanwhile, who

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Speaker 1: taught her how to group text talking about I'm tired?

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Speaker 1: And I was like, Mommy, like, that's something you tell

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Speaker 1: people like the week before, so we can like we

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Speaker 1: can like pull it out. She was like, oh, I'll

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Speaker 1: figure it out. So and I still expect everybody to

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Speaker 1: be at the house with food in hand. So I

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Speaker 1: was like, wait, I don't have the time to figure out.

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Speaker 1: So I call my favorite so food spot. I'm like, so,

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Speaker 1: how much does a full Thanksgiving dinner car? And they

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Speaker 1: were like one hundred and five bucks. I'm like, what

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Speaker 1: does that come with? They're like a full turkey and

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Speaker 1: five sides, and I think like a dessert. I was like,

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Speaker 1: really four hundred and five bucks. So I told my sisters,

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Speaker 1: everybody have twenty five bucks and they said yes. I'm like, well,

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Speaker 1: Thanksgiving is back on.

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Speaker 2: Wait what do you gonna eat, miss vegan?

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Speaker 1: I know on sides honestly, likely just some side. And

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Speaker 1: my mom, even though she said she's not cooking, she's

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Speaker 1: going to cook. Like my mom cannot help but cook.

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Speaker 1: She just means she doesn't want to do the huge overhaul.

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Speaker 1: She'll probably make like like cause Nigeria's we tend to

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Speaker 1: have a lot of vegetable dishes, so like she'll probably

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Speaker 1: make like two or three of those or whatever. She

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Speaker 1: just doesn't want to do, like the root or to

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Speaker 1: the tutor, you know.

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Speaker 2: I hear that, and I feel like Thanksgiving should be

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Speaker 2: a pot look like everyone's sort of break, like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: the host does the turkey and the main sides like

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Speaker 2: a pumpkin pie and the stuffing and stuff, but then

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Speaker 2: everyone else brings stuff. That's what makes it so much fun,

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Speaker 2: at least like in my fam.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, no, everyone, I told everyone, you know, bring your

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Speaker 1: twenty five bucks and then bring whatever side or dessert

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Speaker 1: you're going to bring, so we should. We always have

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Speaker 1: way more than we need, but at least, like I

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Speaker 1: know that the main step is done, you know.

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Speaker 2: So I'm like, Okay, my dad speaking of more than

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Speaker 2: you need. Every year, at least when I was growing up.

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Speaker 2: He probably still does this, but every year after Thanksgiving

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Speaker 2: he takes he like wraps up plates of leftover food

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Speaker 2: and he'll just go under the highway overpasses, I mean

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Speaker 2: male privilege, right, and just drop off bags to homeless people.

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Speaker 2: He used to take me with him, and I'd be like, oh, Dad, no,

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Speaker 2: I don't know, but you know, you grow up, you

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Speaker 2: start to respect your parents' quirky habits.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, no, that's awesome.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, I'm really excited. And then and it started.

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Speaker 2: I'm starting to feel like Chrimas time, I'm already having

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Speaker 2: the argument with my siblings, like are we gonna do gifts? No,

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Speaker 2: we're not going to do gifts. Someone wants to do gifts.

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Speaker 2: Somebody wants to do white Elephant, Like we're going through

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Speaker 2: that whole situation right now, but any day now Christmas time, Yeah, I.

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Speaker 1: Think we're gonna do I sign up for the one

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Speaker 1: that you suggested last year, draw names or something.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a bunch of those like name drawing sites.

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Speaker 1: I love it until you've shared that site. So for

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Speaker 1: those of you who were like, what's that? So Mandy

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Speaker 1: told me about the site last year, I think it was.

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Speaker 1: I think it was originally called Secret Santa or something,

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Speaker 1: but it ends up really being the site called draw

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Speaker 1: names dot com. Totally free. So if you do like

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Speaker 1: that kind of the gift exchange where you choose one

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Speaker 1: person out of a group and that kind of thing,

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Speaker 1: it's great because you put in your budget like whatever

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Speaker 1: it is, like the gift can't be more than twenty

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Speaker 1: five dollars, and then everyone puts in their name and

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Speaker 1: their email and like three gifts or whatever that they'd like.

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Speaker 1: So you've got to choose, and then the thing, the

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Speaker 1: program or their website for free will send you your person,

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Speaker 1: like you've got Karen, and here's the three things she'd like,

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Speaker 1: and here's the general budget, like so you pick a

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Speaker 1: budget overall for everyone. So it's awesome because my sisters

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Speaker 1: and I used to do it every year anyway, but

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Speaker 1: we would literally pick names out of a bowl and

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Speaker 1: then I would always forget like, wait, who's my person?

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Speaker 1: So every year I forget and so I just remember

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Speaker 1: because draw Names just actually emailed me like it's that

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Speaker 1: kind of year again. I was like, look at draw.

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Speaker 2: Name, Oh so good marketing.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, and then two, what's so awesome you could say

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Speaker 1: you can actually put in there. Make sure you don't

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Speaker 1: get the person from last year. You're like, look at Johnny,

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Speaker 1: I don't even remember who I had last year, you know.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, I'm excited to see like my niece, my nephew,

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Speaker 1: my mom, my dad, my sisters, and of course Hobby

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Speaker 1: is gonna come, and then we're gonna my mom always

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Speaker 1: has an early dinner like three, I don't know why,

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Speaker 1: and then we're going to go to his sisters afterwards

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Speaker 1: and spend, you know, spend the rest of the evening there.

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Speaker 2: So a blended holiday, but now it's weird. I was

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Speaker 2: selfish this year for Thanksgiving. I was like, I'm not

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Speaker 2: seeing any other family. I just want to see my

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Speaker 2: immediate family. I'm not like cause you know, like I

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Speaker 2: don't know. Growing up, I was always going to like

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Speaker 2: different houses and different things, and it's just I just

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Speaker 2: want to park it and just be somewhere and I

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Speaker 2: have to be in traffic driving all over the city.

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Speaker 2: But for Christmas, we are doing first of all, wire

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Speaker 2: flights to Minneapolis, like nine hundred dollars for two people. Ridiculous.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, You're not are you? You're not traveling

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Speaker 2: for Christmas?

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Speaker 1: Are you no favorites New Jersey?

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Speaker 2: I'm telling Christmas on a weekend is the worst because

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Speaker 2: like first year, have the first waymie of like, it's

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Speaker 2: the holiday, so tickets are always more expensive, but I

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Speaker 2: think the fact that it falls on a weekend just

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Speaker 2: made everything so much more expensive. Like last year, I

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Speaker 2: bought tickets to visit my mom for Christmas and they

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Speaker 2: were less than three hundred dollars each, and this year

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Speaker 2: it was four fifty apiece. So I was like, and

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Speaker 2: I could have gone to Europe, but yeah, right, I

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Speaker 2: guess I'll go to Minneapolis instead. Yeah, out out out.

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Speaker 2: And then they have those basic economy seats which they

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Speaker 2: don't even like do you have you ever gotten basic

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Speaker 2: economy by accident? Yes, it's the worst. You can't bring

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Speaker 2: a carry on, like, you don't get to choose your seat.

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Speaker 2: I don't think it's.

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Speaker 1: Guarantee the middle You're like, they're like, well, you're guaranteed

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Speaker 1: the middle, and I'm like, honestly, the airlines are trash

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Speaker 1: and they're getting trash here by the day, so pray

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Speaker 1: for your right. I know. It's like, uh, because you're looking,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, so wait, there's actually lower than low.

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Speaker 2: Oh.

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Speaker 1: Thanks, guaranteed middle guaranteed, no outlet guaranteed.

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Speaker 2: Like guaranteed to board last. So everyone can just you know,

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Speaker 2: watch everyone go before you. Yeah, I'm done. I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 2: I'll spend the extra forty bucks to not feel like

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Speaker 2: second rate, third rate, fifth rate. Yeah, a lot of days.

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Speaker 2: What else is happening? Christy Tiagan and John Legend are

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Speaker 2: having a baby, another one. They're allowed to have them

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Speaker 2: as many as they want.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, No, I love that because I know that they

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Speaker 1: were having a hard time before.

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Speaker 2: You know, oh I remember that. Yeah, when she like

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Speaker 2: cried she had a didn't wait, she used to have

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Speaker 2: a TV show or something, and she like cried talking

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Speaker 2: about what how did they do? Were they like doing

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Speaker 2: in vitro or something? I forget I.

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Speaker 1: Think so, And honestly, they she just was having such

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Speaker 1: a hard time. I remember she talked about that everyone

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Speaker 1: want to feel like when you guys gonna have kids,

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Speaker 1: and she said that it'd always break her heart because

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Speaker 1: they were trying. And you know, people think like, well,

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Speaker 1: you don't have kids. You know, sometimes it's because you

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Speaker 1: just don't want, but sometimes there are literally women who've

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Speaker 1: been trying for years. So when you're like, so you're

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Speaker 1: in your huschood, I'm not gonna have kids, You're like, oh, thanks,

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Speaker 1: because you know I've been trying, but for some reason,

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Speaker 1: I'm not able. So like, especially now that I'm like older,

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Speaker 1: now that we're trying and we're having a hard time,

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Speaker 1: that like I'm more sensitive to that because you know,

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Speaker 1: it seemed like such an innocent question, like, oh, you

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Speaker 1: guys gonna have kids? What are you waiting on?

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Speaker 2: Like h and it's the holidays coming up? So you know,

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Speaker 2: any any single women out there? This is this is

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Speaker 2: our dreaded I mean I just said hour, but you're dreaded.

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Speaker 2: It was mine too. Last year, it was what's the

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Speaker 2: wedding coming up? What you got planned? It's always something.

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Speaker 2: Now it's are you gonna have a baby? When you

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Speaker 2: gonna have a baby? Yes, just women in general. Man,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, can you talk to my husband? Here's his phone, number.

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Speaker 2: He's right over there on the couch. Go go ask

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Speaker 2: him these questions. Oh, awkward family, awkward family holiday talks exactly.

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Speaker 2: It's exciting for them.

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Speaker 1: No, it is exciting, and I'm happy for her. I'm

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Speaker 1: just glad my mom started to cut out because we

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Speaker 1: used to do these huge family gatherings where it was

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Speaker 1: like whose house it was like maybe five families, we

398
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Speaker 1: would rotate houses. But the last couple of Thanksgiving it's

399
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Speaker 1: been really small, which I like, it's just literally my sister's,

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Speaker 1: my mom and my dad and then sometimes an auxiliary

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Speaker 1: friend that somebody might bring or like, you know, like

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Speaker 1: a random husband or so. But it's been really intimate

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Speaker 1: and just nice. You know.

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Speaker 2: I love it small and cozy and no randos.

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Speaker 1: Exactly because that means it means that it's less there's

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Speaker 1: less likely to be not that we ever have drama,

407
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Speaker 1: but less likely to have those awkward none of your

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Speaker 1: business questions.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, yeah, you could just play them. Tracy Ellis

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Speaker 2: Ross's speech from the Glamour The Glamour Women of the

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Speaker 2: What was it Women of the Year Awards? Did you

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Speaker 2: see her with.

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Speaker 1: No Drina went? Which I was so jelly, But whatever.

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Speaker 2: You guys getting all the fun stuff. But she well,

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Speaker 2: you can, you can from the comfort of your own home.

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Speaker 2: You can watch the clip of Tracy Ellis at Ross's speech.

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Speaker 2: She gave a speech basically on just that, like she's

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Speaker 2: forty five, doesn't have a husband, doesn't have kids, and

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Speaker 2: how she like she's talking about basically how she came

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Speaker 2: to terms with that and what she tells people when

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Speaker 2: they question her. But uh, yeah, I imagine that's really frustrating,

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Speaker 2: especially when, like, you know, in her speech, she's like,

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Speaker 2: I know, I haven't done these two things baby in marriage,

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Speaker 2: but I have done like a million other things, right,

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Speaker 2: you know.

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Speaker 1: Why does that become the qualifier? Like, you know, it's

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Speaker 1: so weird because it's like, before you know, I got married,

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Speaker 1: it was like, oh, oh, you built a sixth figure

429
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:32,040
Speaker 1: and a seventh figure business. Oh, especially after being a

430
00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:34,680
Speaker 1: preschool teacher and losing your job. All those things are good,

431
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,600
Speaker 1: you know, and you got married, Oh my god, you

432
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:40,880
Speaker 1: got oh. Like I'm like, because that was way easier

433
00:20:40,920 --> 00:20:45,679
Speaker 1: than everything else totally, and it's so crazy. I feel like,

434
00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:47,760
Speaker 1: you know, if I'm blessed to be get pregnant, which

435
00:20:47,840 --> 00:20:49,280
Speaker 1: of course is such a blessing, and I know people

436
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:52,360
Speaker 1: are going to be excited, but it's not something where

437
00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:57,159
Speaker 1: it's not like, aside from you know, the regular stuff,

438
00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:59,520
Speaker 1: there's nothing I can do about my body deciding whether

439
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:01,119
Speaker 1: or it's going to happen, you know what I mean. Like,

440
00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:04,360
Speaker 1: it's not like I can I can. I can put

441
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,800
Speaker 1: in work to make the budgetista be successful, but and

442
00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:09,239
Speaker 1: I mean, I can do my best as far as

443
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:12,040
Speaker 1: the baby's concerned, but ultimately, my body's gonna do. My

444
00:21:12,359 --> 00:21:14,919
Speaker 1: body's gonna do. So it's so disheartening that that's like

445
00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:17,600
Speaker 1: you're like, you get a gold shiny metal You're a

446
00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:21,000
Speaker 1: real woman now, you know, Like you know that part

447
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:23,480
Speaker 1: is frustrating because you're like, that's why I share with

448
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,560
Speaker 1: you guys about like the fibroids and like the trying

449
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:29,359
Speaker 1: and because you know, it's not easy. And so there

450
00:21:29,440 --> 00:21:31,119
Speaker 1: might be a woman that you know and you're like, well,

451
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:33,080
Speaker 1: why don't you any kids? And meanwhile she's like, thanks,

452
00:21:33,119 --> 00:21:37,480
Speaker 1: I had a miscarriage yesterday, but okay, you know, yeah, no,

453
00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:41,080
Speaker 1: you know, and so yeah, it's not easy at all.

454
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:54,560
Speaker 1: All right, So are you ready to boost or break?

455
00:21:55,080 --> 00:22:00,240
Speaker 1: Brown boosts? Brown break? What you're gonna do Are you ready?

456
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:02,560
Speaker 2: I'm ready born ready.

457
00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:08,800
Speaker 1: Well, I think I'm gonna take a break from the

458
00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:12,000
Speaker 1: whole Black Friday Cyber Monday thing. Like I mean, don't

459
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:13,960
Speaker 1: get me wrong, like if there's something you're kind of

460
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:17,080
Speaker 1: squatting on, like ooh, I've been wanting this hair dryer

461
00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:20,080
Speaker 1: or this vacuum clean or whatever, but I feel like

462
00:22:20,720 --> 00:22:24,160
Speaker 1: the marketers are winning and you're getting stuff that you're

463
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:26,160
Speaker 1: like I don't really need or I don't really want

464
00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:27,199
Speaker 1: or you know.

465
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:27,680
Speaker 2: What I mean.

466
00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:30,080
Speaker 1: Like, I just feel like I'm just taking a break

467
00:22:30,119 --> 00:22:32,679
Speaker 1: because I asked my husband last night, Oh, my husband,

468
00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:34,880
Speaker 1: it always sounds it still sounds crazy. Does it still

469
00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:36,439
Speaker 1: sounds crazy to you? My husband?

470
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:38,800
Speaker 2: When you say it, it sounds a lot less awkward

471
00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:42,480
Speaker 2: than saying fiance, Like fiance, I felt like, oh, fiance

472
00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:48,480
Speaker 2: have potentious I don't know, but I honestly say husby,

473
00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:50,439
Speaker 2: it's really weird. I should probably not say that, but

474
00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:52,919
Speaker 2: I started saying husbye, and I just can't stop.

475
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:55,800
Speaker 1: But yeah, whenever I say husband, I'm always like wait,

476
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:58,800
Speaker 1: who oh my god head right there? So yeah, So

477
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:02,440
Speaker 1: I was asking him what do you want for you know, Christmas?

478
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:05,879
Speaker 1: And he was like honestly, I just want to be happy,

479
00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:08,840
Speaker 1: and I'm like, okay, aside from that, and he was like, honestly,

480
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:12,040
Speaker 1: he wants a stereo system, but he was like, I

481
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:13,960
Speaker 1: don't want to get it here where we are because

482
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:15,840
Speaker 1: I want when we get to the house that we

483
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:18,399
Speaker 1: install one specifically for the house. So I said, okay,

484
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:22,560
Speaker 1: so that's not something you know that I'm gonna get.

485
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:25,399
Speaker 1: And then for Supergirl, I mean, I don't think she

486
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:28,720
Speaker 1: wants anything super techy. I feel like that Black Friday

487
00:23:28,760 --> 00:23:31,320
Speaker 1: and Cyber Money are great times to get deals on

488
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:34,399
Speaker 1: like tech items or like a big ticket item. And

489
00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:38,080
Speaker 1: she's pretty easy, honestly. For some reason, she's really into

490
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,600
Speaker 1: doll babies right now, like she wasn't when she was younger,

491
00:23:41,119 --> 00:23:44,399
Speaker 1: and now she's like American Girl, you know, or whatever

492
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:47,560
Speaker 1: the equivalent is a Target and like doll baby clothes.

493
00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:49,639
Speaker 1: She's eleven, so she know she's still in that age,

494
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,720
Speaker 1: and so she's super easy. Honestly, I could spend like

495
00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:55,399
Speaker 1: fifty bucks at Target and rack up and she'd be like,

496
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:59,040
Speaker 1: oh my god, you know. So other than that, I

497
00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:00,840
Speaker 1: just feel like there's nothing, really, like I don't have

498
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,879
Speaker 1: anything even for myself. There's no tech gadget that I

499
00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:06,080
Speaker 1: kind of want. So I don't really have any plans

500
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:09,960
Speaker 1: I'm spending buying anything on Cyber Money or a Black Friday,

501
00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:11,920
Speaker 1: but I just want to take a break from it

502
00:24:12,119 --> 00:24:14,639
Speaker 1: or maybe a pause and make sure that you are

503
00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:16,760
Speaker 1: going to get something for Black Friday or Cyber Money.

504
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:18,959
Speaker 1: You're not just getting stuff because you're just getting it,

505
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:22,199
Speaker 1: you know, Like you know, like make your list. So

506
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:25,399
Speaker 1: one thing I do do for for the holiday season

507
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:27,680
Speaker 1: is I kind of make a list of like everyone

508
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:31,880
Speaker 1: I'm potentially gonna get gifts for, and then I kind

509
00:24:31,920 --> 00:24:34,639
Speaker 1: of map out like, oh, I likely get her this

510
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:36,800
Speaker 1: and him this and then that just so, and then

511
00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:39,159
Speaker 1: I kind of write down how much each item is

512
00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:41,800
Speaker 1: gonna cost. So I have a basic working budget. So

513
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:44,480
Speaker 1: I'm not like, cause one thing I've never had is

514
00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:47,480
Speaker 1: credit card debt after the holiday seasons like ever ever,

515
00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:51,200
Speaker 1: you know, because I'm like, well, one of my sisters

516
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:53,480
Speaker 1: will get something we're not getting all fult for because

517
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:56,040
Speaker 1: we have that draw names. I have a niece and

518
00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:58,679
Speaker 1: nephew now, but he's too and she's seven months, so

519
00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:00,080
Speaker 1: literally I can give him a lot about it and

520
00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:03,880
Speaker 1: they're like yay, you know, you don't have a god son.

521
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:06,520
Speaker 1: He's too as well, So I mean, you know, there

522
00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 1: just would be like ten bucks maybe because they have

523
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:11,360
Speaker 1: so many toys already. So and I might not even

524
00:25:11,359 --> 00:25:13,719
Speaker 1: give them a gift honestly or something really an expensive

525
00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:15,240
Speaker 1: and then put money in there. I have. I have

526
00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:18,639
Speaker 1: accounts for all of them and so and my parents

527
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:19,880
Speaker 1: are fairly easy.

528
00:25:19,880 --> 00:25:21,879
Speaker 2: Like savings accounts are like IRA.

529
00:25:22,880 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 1: Yes, I'm trying to God what to do because they're

530
00:25:24,760 --> 00:25:26,720
Speaker 1: still really young. I'm trying to figure out where to

531
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:29,720
Speaker 1: put their money. I want to ask my financial advisor, like, okay,

532
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:34,159
Speaker 1: I give them one hundred dollars for each year that

533
00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 1: they're born on their birthday, so it's I have an

534
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:40,600
Speaker 1: account for Supergirl, my niece, my nephew, and my godson.

535
00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:42,880
Speaker 1: So that's four kids. And so for a Supergirl, when

536
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:45,160
Speaker 1: she turns eleven, I put eleven hundred dollars in her account.

537
00:25:45,359 --> 00:25:47,439
Speaker 1: My nephew turned two, two hundred dollars, and then they

538
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:48,480
Speaker 1: get fifty bucks a month.

539
00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:49,720
Speaker 2: That's going to be expensive.

540
00:25:50,359 --> 00:25:51,760
Speaker 1: I know, I don't even know why I started it

541
00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:52,480
Speaker 1: like that or whatever.

542
00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:56,360
Speaker 2: So when she turns twenty one, yeah.

543
00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,040
Speaker 1: But you know what though, it said, I want it

544
00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:00,680
Speaker 1: really for by the time, I mean forever and ever.

545
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,040
Speaker 1: I don't know when I'm going to stop it. Maybe

546
00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:04,800
Speaker 1: when maybe when she turns twenty one and then. But

547
00:26:04,800 --> 00:26:06,760
Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out, like is it for college

548
00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 1: or what is it gonna be? But I you know,

549
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:13,119
Speaker 1: I've been consistently like putting money toward it to decide.

550
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:14,840
Speaker 1: But I'm trying to figure out where's the best place

551
00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:17,040
Speaker 1: to put it because I feel like, obviously a savings

552
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:19,320
Speaker 1: account isn't it. But I also don't want to put

553
00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:21,400
Speaker 1: it in in a five.

554
00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:23,960
Speaker 2: Or one, well no one, five two nine plan.

555
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:27,000
Speaker 1: Yes, which is the college savings plan, because I don't

556
00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:29,479
Speaker 1: know what college is going to be like in ten years,

557
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:32,000
Speaker 1: and I don't want to lock their money into a

558
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,919
Speaker 1: into a plan that they get penalized if it's not

559
00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:36,240
Speaker 1: used for certain things.

560
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,520
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, five two nine plans. It can only

561
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 2: be used for college expenses, although you can transfer it

562
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:44,960
Speaker 2: to other people like another niece or nephew or like

563
00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:48,080
Speaker 2: a relative or something. But why not just like have

564
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,360
Speaker 2: their parent open a custodial ira for them.

565
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,119
Speaker 1: I was thinking that, like that was something that I

566
00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:55,960
Speaker 1: was thinking that that might be the way is to

567
00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:59,320
Speaker 1: put it in a custodial iray so it can't grow

568
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:01,080
Speaker 1: and then it can be use. Now if it's a

569
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:05,359
Speaker 1: custodial ira with like a regular ira, or does it

570
00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:07,159
Speaker 1: is it? Do they have to wait for it to

571
00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:10,199
Speaker 1: fully mature until they're like retirement age in order to

572
00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:12,240
Speaker 1: not have any penalty for withdrawing.

573
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:15,240
Speaker 2: No, I think that you can. I think it depends

574
00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:19,640
Speaker 2: on what they're withdrawing the funds for. But I think

575
00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:21,520
Speaker 2: you can use it. For example, like if you're going

576
00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:23,600
Speaker 2: to put a down payment on a house, you can.

577
00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 2: I think you can probably use it to pay for

578
00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:31,400
Speaker 2: education expenses. You can definitely use it for retirement. I mean,

579
00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:33,080
Speaker 2: what do you I guess it. I guess it depends

580
00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:34,639
Speaker 2: on what you want them to be able to do

581
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:37,840
Speaker 2: with the money. But in terms of like when they

582
00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:39,439
Speaker 2: have access to it, I think it would. I think

583
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,879
Speaker 2: they get access to it when they turn eighteen, and

584
00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:44,080
Speaker 2: then you kind of like give the keys to them

585
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:46,560
Speaker 2: and they can go forth. They could roll it over

586
00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:49,119
Speaker 2: into whatever they wanted to roll it over into.

587
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:52,960
Speaker 1: Okay, I like that custodial ira. I'm gonna do a

588
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:55,440
Speaker 1: little more digging because I've been asking myself, like Tiffany,

589
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:57,560
Speaker 1: you know better than to keep this into this low

590
00:27:57,600 --> 00:28:01,760
Speaker 1: performing even though it's ally but low performing savings account.

591
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:04,360
Speaker 1: I've just been dragging my feet about where to put it, you.

592
00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:08,520
Speaker 2: Know, yeah here you I mean, you could just open

593
00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 2: up like a coast total IRA somewhere like wherever you

594
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:13,600
Speaker 2: have your brokerage account, and then you know, you can

595
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:17,679
Speaker 2: always roll it over or they could always roll it

596
00:28:17,680 --> 00:28:19,560
Speaker 2: over when we finally have access to it. As long

597
00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:21,680
Speaker 2: as you roll it over to another IRA should be fine,

598
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:24,040
Speaker 2: like if they don't like the company or something like that.

599
00:28:24,960 --> 00:28:25,919
Speaker 1: Okay, I like that.

600
00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,160
Speaker 2: Hm, Okay, our friends have like five two nine plans

601
00:28:29,200 --> 00:28:30,760
Speaker 2: that we just put the money there because that's where

602
00:28:30,760 --> 00:28:32,439
Speaker 2: they want it to go. But yeah, I think what

603
00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:35,199
Speaker 2: you say makes sense because, like I mean, I guess

604
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,480
Speaker 2: like they're assuming college is always going to be really expensive.

605
00:28:37,560 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 2: But what if you don't need all the money.

606
00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:42,200
Speaker 1: Exactly, or just like what if because like I'm pretty

607
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:45,440
Speaker 1: sure Supergirl is going to go, but like the baby

608
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:50,479
Speaker 1: is too, Like you know, in sixteen years, people might

609
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:52,640
Speaker 1: be going to like do like college might not be

610
00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 1: the thing that that it is. And now you know

611
00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:56,960
Speaker 1: what I mean, And I just don't want to lock

612
00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 1: them into like, oh, you know what instead or what

613
00:28:59,680 --> 00:29:03,360
Speaker 1: if Like my nephew is like sixteen and like this

614
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 1: super genius and he wants to start a company. I

615
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:07,440
Speaker 1: don't want him to not to be able to say,

616
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:08,720
Speaker 1: you know, I really like to use his money to

617
00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:09,680
Speaker 1: invest in my company.

618
00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:13,760
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, I mean Mark. You could also do CDs,

619
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:16,560
Speaker 2: like a long term CD, like if you really don't

620
00:29:16,560 --> 00:29:18,320
Speaker 2: want like if you know they're not going to touch

621
00:29:18,360 --> 00:29:21,720
Speaker 2: it until you know, ten fifteen years from now, can

622
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:24,680
Speaker 2: put in CDs that might earn more than a I know,

623
00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:26,800
Speaker 2: my grandma put mine in like a I don't even

624
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:29,040
Speaker 2: know what it was back when savings bonds had raped

625
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 2: had like you could earn something on a savings bond

626
00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:33,920
Speaker 2: and then I got it when I forget how old

627
00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 2: I was, I think must have like high school graduation

628
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:39,320
Speaker 2: or something. But yeah, I feel like a CD might

629
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:41,520
Speaker 2: Maybe that's like the maybe that's like the even the

630
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 2: middle ground. If you don't want to lock it up

631
00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:47,040
Speaker 2: until at fifty nine and a half, you know, in IRA,

632
00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:49,280
Speaker 2: or if it until they go to college, then maybe

633
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:51,480
Speaker 2: you could just do like CDs just so you're earning

634
00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:52,840
Speaker 2: them a little bit more.

635
00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:55,920
Speaker 1: I wonder though with a CD, because you know, like

636
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 1: how I contribute fifty bucks a month? I wonder how

637
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 1: that works? Like, can do I add money? Do I

638
00:30:01,360 --> 00:30:02,880
Speaker 1: have to get a CD every month? You know what

639
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:03,280
Speaker 1: I mean?

640
00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:06,960
Speaker 2: Oh? Can you continue adding money? Good question? I don't know.

641
00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:10,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's that's a good question to ask.

642
00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:13,560
Speaker 1: I'm gonna sit down with Maybe I'll just even call

643
00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 1: like ally just to see, like just to get a

644
00:30:15,520 --> 00:30:17,760
Speaker 1: base because that is a good idea, because you know

645
00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:19,320
Speaker 1: you're right though, because if you're going to save money

646
00:30:19,320 --> 00:30:22,440
Speaker 1: for little ones in your life, you want to maximize

647
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:25,200
Speaker 1: your interest because they can actually take advantage, like all

648
00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:27,000
Speaker 1: the stuff that you said, I wish I knew this

649
00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:28,480
Speaker 1: when I was younger. You get to do it for

650
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 1: someone who.

651
00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 2: Is younger exactly.

652
00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:34,640
Speaker 1: But yeah, so Brown, break from these from using all

653
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:37,480
Speaker 1: tricking up all your money Black Friday. Get something that

654
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:40,040
Speaker 1: you've been like having your eye on, but make your

655
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:41,840
Speaker 1: list for the people that you want to buy things for,

656
00:30:42,560 --> 00:30:44,560
Speaker 1: and try not to just get stuff just to get

657
00:30:44,600 --> 00:30:46,640
Speaker 1: stuff like oh but it's on sale, but you're not

658
00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:48,360
Speaker 1: really saving if you weren't on to buy it anyway.

659
00:30:48,520 --> 00:30:55,920
Speaker 1: But no judgment, no judgment, but a side I.

660
00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:56,120
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna hide. I'm not going anywhere Black Friday.

661
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:59,040
Speaker 2: It's a nightmare. The one thing I do allow myself

662
00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:01,640
Speaker 2: to do is Black Friday always has really good clothing sales,

663
00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:04,720
Speaker 2: like online, so I will like get new genes. That's

664
00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:06,840
Speaker 2: my new gene day. I don't know how hy jeans

665
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:11,480
Speaker 2: are so important, but anyway, that's my one allowance. Yeah.

666
00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:15,000
Speaker 2: So my brown break is also going to be holiday themed.

667
00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:19,320
Speaker 2: And I was thinking back about one of the mistakes

668
00:31:19,320 --> 00:31:21,160
Speaker 2: I made. I used to work at Coals. For those

669
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,480
Speaker 2: of you, I don't think I've mentioned that before. When

670
00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:26,800
Speaker 2: I was in college and they used to pressure us

671
00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:29,480
Speaker 2: to like sell, I worked at the Gap and at Coals,

672
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:32,400
Speaker 2: and I was like one of the top sales reps

673
00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:34,520
Speaker 2: because I could get anybody to open up a Coals

674
00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:37,400
Speaker 2: charge or a Gap card. They were like, yeah, I

675
00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:39,480
Speaker 2: was like, really good at it. I had no idea

676
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:42,080
Speaker 2: what the hell I was telling them, but I was like, yeah,

677
00:31:42,160 --> 00:31:44,520
Speaker 2: open up this gap card. You get fifteen percent of today.

678
00:31:44,560 --> 00:31:46,920
Speaker 2: It's amazing. Your hair looks great, you look fatulous, those

679
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:48,680
Speaker 2: jeans look amazing on you. Of course you want a

680
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:51,320
Speaker 2: gap card. Just keep these good vibes going and I

681
00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:53,920
Speaker 2: would open up like dozens of GAP cards per month,

682
00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:56,640
Speaker 2: and they would reward us for it. You would get

683
00:31:56,640 --> 00:32:00,400
Speaker 2: like pizza, You would get a little cash bonus depending

684
00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:03,440
Speaker 2: on how many cards you would sell people on. And

685
00:32:03,480 --> 00:32:06,280
Speaker 2: the Gap and Coles both did this. And it wasn't

686
00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:09,760
Speaker 2: until obviously I grew up and you know, started writing

687
00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:12,840
Speaker 2: about personal finance and learning more about like the products

688
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:15,440
Speaker 2: out there, that I realized how freaking terrible retail store

689
00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:18,160
Speaker 2: cards are. And I was like, oh snap, so many

690
00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:21,480
Speaker 2: times I put people on this path toward destruction. I

691
00:32:21,520 --> 00:32:24,480
Speaker 2: had no idea, Like I myself opened up a Coals

692
00:32:24,560 --> 00:32:26,760
Speaker 2: charge card in college and it was like a very

693
00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:29,000
Speaker 2: small limit. It was like six hundred dollars, and I

694
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:31,840
Speaker 2: would just like charge stuff there and I was like, man,

695
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:33,800
Speaker 2: why is And I would be paying the minimum balance

696
00:32:33,840 --> 00:32:35,200
Speaker 2: and one day I loose in my account and it

697
00:32:35,200 --> 00:32:38,560
Speaker 2: was more than six hundred dollars because financing charges were

698
00:32:38,560 --> 00:32:40,880
Speaker 2: like the APR when I was in school was twenty

699
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:45,000
Speaker 2: six point nine to nine percent, which is crazy, And

700
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:48,120
Speaker 2: I think you save what ten percent when you open

701
00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:50,840
Speaker 2: up the card, But if you're like saving ten percent

702
00:32:50,920 --> 00:32:52,920
Speaker 2: today and you're going to carry a balance and then

703
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:55,720
Speaker 2: you're going to get charged twenty six percent, twenty seven

704
00:32:55,760 --> 00:33:00,320
Speaker 2: percent almost like the next month. It makes no sense. Yeah,

705
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:02,600
Speaker 2: but I feel like, I mean, I just want you

706
00:33:02,640 --> 00:33:05,040
Speaker 2: to be on everywhere anyone who's going shopping on Black

707
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:08,240
Speaker 2: Friday or whatever anytime really, because they're always pushing credit cards.

708
00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 2: Just think about it before you take the like you

709
00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:14,080
Speaker 2: take the carrot that they're dangling in front of you, Like,

710
00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:16,080
Speaker 2: is it really gonna be worth that ten percent off?

711
00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:18,840
Speaker 2: If one I'm gonna ding my credit score by applying

712
00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:21,320
Speaker 2: for this, and two I'm not going to be able

713
00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:23,280
Speaker 2: to pay off the balance and I'm just gonna get

714
00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:26,640
Speaker 2: dragged for the next ten months or however long you know,

715
00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:30,400
Speaker 2: with these interest charges before you sign up. And also

716
00:33:30,680 --> 00:33:34,680
Speaker 2: I apologize for what I contributed to this cas how

717
00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 2: I have a guilty conscious about like.

718
00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:43,240
Speaker 1: I was whoa because you have you still have a

719
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:45,200
Speaker 1: baby face, so you probably just like, oh my gosh,

720
00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:47,680
Speaker 1: this cute girl off, how do you know what I'm

721
00:33:47,680 --> 00:33:49,280
Speaker 1: gonna apply? You're like, okay, great.

722
00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:52,240
Speaker 2: Once or twice you'd get the sassy customer to be

723
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 2: like you don't even know what you're selling, do you?

724
00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:56,760
Speaker 2: Like you know, like the woke the woke bomb, that

725
00:33:56,960 --> 00:34:02,240
Speaker 2: is me. I mean, I don't know, I'm sorry. Yeah.

726
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:04,680
Speaker 1: So my sister used to always be like, like whatever

727
00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:06,680
Speaker 1: you go out, she's like, oh God, like what someone's like,

728
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:08,839
Speaker 1: would you like to sign up for a credit card?

729
00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:11,879
Speaker 1: She's always like, oh God, please yes, And if they

730
00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:14,600
Speaker 1: push it, I'm like she's asking for it. Then I'm like, ma'am,

731
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 1: do you know that every time you ask somebody to

732
00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:19,319
Speaker 1: apply for one of these cards they could potentially use

733
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:21,480
Speaker 1: up to thirty points depending on how many cars they've

734
00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:24,760
Speaker 1: applied for before, And that these store cards to interest

735
00:34:24,800 --> 00:34:27,400
Speaker 1: rates are ridiculous and you're actually destroying their financial future.

736
00:34:27,840 --> 00:34:29,600
Speaker 1: And then I always felt so bad after it because

737
00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:32,880
Speaker 1: I always looking like I didn't I didn't know. I

738
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:36,879
Speaker 1: didn't I didn't know. And I'm like, will you think

739
00:34:36,920 --> 00:34:39,320
Speaker 1: about that next time you signed somebody up for a card, haven't,

740
00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:40,040
Speaker 1: I say.

741
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:47,879
Speaker 2: Mike drop Yeah, yep. All right, we Rea did some questions, yes,

742
00:34:48,080 --> 00:34:51,400
Speaker 2: question quicker questions. So we have a good question today

743
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:53,000
Speaker 2: and if you guys want to submit a question, you

744
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,960
Speaker 2: can go to Brian Ambition podcast dot com or hit

745
00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:59,480
Speaker 2: us up on Gmail at Brian Ambition Podcasts at gmail

746
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:05,200
Speaker 2: dot com or Facebook or LinkedIn or smoke signal. Whatever

747
00:35:06,320 --> 00:35:09,360
Speaker 2: today's question comes from doesn't want to be named. So

748
00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:12,960
Speaker 2: I just read a post about Shonda Rhyme, so I'm

749
00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:16,240
Speaker 2: just gonna say her name is Shonda. So here's Shonda's question.

750
00:35:17,239 --> 00:35:19,360
Speaker 2: First of all, thank you for the podcast. You're welcome.

751
00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:22,279
Speaker 2: She says, I'm currently stuck between a hard and a

752
00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:25,280
Speaker 2: rock place a heart and I just read that completely wrong.

753
00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:31,680
Speaker 2: That was me. I'm sorry, Shonda, you didn't write it wrong.

754
00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:36,000
Speaker 2: I'm just tired. Okay, sorry. Her question is about voluntary

755
00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:39,120
Speaker 2: reprossessions on her car, so okay. She says, I'm currently

756
00:35:39,120 --> 00:35:41,799
Speaker 2: stuck between a rock and a hard place. I'm a

757
00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:45,360
Speaker 2: single mother of a special needs child. His medical expenses

758
00:35:45,360 --> 00:35:48,920
Speaker 2: are getting more expensive daily. Unfortunately, I don't qualify for

759
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,319
Speaker 2: any assistance due to my income. I'm at a point

760
00:35:51,320 --> 00:35:54,360
Speaker 2: in which I'd like to purchase a house. My dilemma

761
00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:56,279
Speaker 2: is that I can't save any money due to my

762
00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:59,080
Speaker 2: almost six hundred dollars car. Note. I can't get a

763
00:35:59,160 --> 00:36:03,000
Speaker 2: refinanced because the balance is too high. My question is,

764
00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:06,040
Speaker 2: do you recommend a voluntary repossession of my car. I'm

765
00:36:06,080 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 2: a member of a credit union that will find excuse me.

766
00:36:09,480 --> 00:36:11,480
Speaker 2: I'm a member of my credit union that will finance

767
00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:13,759
Speaker 2: a new car. My concern is that I will have

768
00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:16,480
Speaker 2: a repossession on my credit report that will hinder me

769
00:36:16,480 --> 00:36:19,640
Speaker 2: from purchasing a home. I'm looking into purchasing using the

770
00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:23,279
Speaker 2: NACA program, which is a little more lenient. But how

771
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:26,480
Speaker 2: bad will a what is that National Association of Credit

772
00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:30,200
Speaker 2: and you look that up anyway, how bad will repossession

773
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:34,800
Speaker 2: look on my credit report? I'm out of options? Thanks

774
00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:37,720
Speaker 2: in advance? Oh she called her? She signed it stuck.

775
00:36:38,719 --> 00:36:42,400
Speaker 1: Oh well, And I share that when I met Superman,

776
00:36:42,560 --> 00:36:45,400
Speaker 1: he had this big, old, beautiful Denali it was whatever

777
00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:48,560
Speaker 1: that new year was, and his co sign it was

778
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:51,920
Speaker 1: none other than his lovely ex girlfriend who you can imagine.

779
00:36:51,960 --> 00:36:58,840
Speaker 1: I was thrilled and Superman because he didn't have me

780
00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:02,640
Speaker 1: in his life. His car payment, Mandy, if you could imagine,

781
00:37:03,239 --> 00:37:05,359
Speaker 1: was nine hundred dollars a month.

782
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:11,840
Speaker 2: Yikes, And I was like, oh how, I.

783
00:37:12,520 --> 00:37:16,200
Speaker 1: Honestly don't know where he Like, I don't know he

784
00:37:16,239 --> 00:37:19,640
Speaker 1: went to the dealership, and I'm assuming that he got

785
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 1: financing through the dealership. Honestly, I don't know. Nine hundred

786
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:25,440
Speaker 1: dollars a month and the reason why he felt comfortable

787
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:29,760
Speaker 1: paying nine hundred because where he worked, he he actually

788
00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:31,960
Speaker 1: got rent for free, so he wasn't paying to live

789
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:34,600
Speaker 1: because he was like on call, like you know. So

790
00:37:34,640 --> 00:37:37,760
Speaker 1: he was like cause he was like on call like handyman,

791
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:40,960
Speaker 1: so he was like, hey, I lived for free. I

792
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:43,279
Speaker 1: could get this big, shiny new car. He didn't have

793
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:46,680
Speaker 1: great credit, so they probably finagled, you know how it is.

794
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:48,880
Speaker 1: They twisted turn and they finago and you get a

795
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:53,279
Speaker 1: co signer and somehow you get to nine hundred a

796
00:37:53,360 --> 00:37:55,640
Speaker 1: whole dollars a month. I remember being like, I've never

797
00:37:55,640 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 1: even heard of that before, and then I was like,

798
00:37:57,760 --> 00:38:00,839
Speaker 1: so on top of that, you're paying insurance, so you're

799
00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:05,720
Speaker 1: paying a full mortgage payment for this brand new big

800
00:38:05,760 --> 00:38:08,640
Speaker 1: truck that you're driving. So like, aside from the fact

801
00:38:08,640 --> 00:38:10,600
Speaker 1: that she was a co signer, I was like, something

802
00:38:10,640 --> 00:38:12,200
Speaker 1: has to give. And I remember he fought me on

803
00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:13,520
Speaker 1: it at first because he was like, no, I can't

804
00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:15,160
Speaker 1: afford It's not like to have to pay rent, I said,

805
00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:17,960
Speaker 1: but one day you might then how will you afford both?

806
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:21,400
Speaker 1: And thankfully, you know, it was more so the girlfriend

807
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:22,799
Speaker 1: thing that made him give it up, because I was like,

808
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:24,880
Speaker 1: I can't be your girlfriend, and this girlfriend is co

809
00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:26,879
Speaker 1: signed because she's using it as a reason to stay

810
00:38:26,880 --> 00:38:30,600
Speaker 1: in your life, and that's not happening. And so he

811
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:36,920
Speaker 1: volunteerly had his card repode and he had to pay

812
00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:39,439
Speaker 1: the balance. I forget what it was. I think maybe

813
00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:41,200
Speaker 1: it was just a few thousand dollars. So you want

814
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:43,319
Speaker 1: to you want to see, there's two ways you can

815
00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:46,279
Speaker 1: do it. You can either give the car back to

816
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:49,879
Speaker 1: you know, the dealership or wherever you got it, or

817
00:38:49,960 --> 00:38:54,239
Speaker 1: you could see if you can sell it for an

818
00:38:54,280 --> 00:38:56,719
Speaker 1: amount that's even more than what you would give it

819
00:38:56,760 --> 00:38:58,799
Speaker 1: back to. So if you could find somebody, let's just

820
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:03,640
Speaker 1: say they say the car is, you owe fifteen thousand,

821
00:39:04,160 --> 00:39:06,480
Speaker 1: And if you give the car back and they say

822
00:39:06,520 --> 00:39:09,359
Speaker 1: that they'll take they'll give you ten. That means you're

823
00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:12,440
Speaker 1: gonna owe five. But let's just say you're able to

824
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:15,520
Speaker 1: sell it for twelve and obviously that's probably a better look.

825
00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:17,840
Speaker 1: That way, you can then give that twelve thousand dollars

826
00:39:17,840 --> 00:39:21,640
Speaker 1: back to whoever you owe it to. So, but I

827
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:24,920
Speaker 1: don't believe did he sell his No. I think he

828
00:39:25,040 --> 00:39:26,799
Speaker 1: just like voluntarily gave it back and just paid off

829
00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:31,640
Speaker 1: the balance. And did it affect his credit, yes, but

830
00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:33,719
Speaker 1: honestly not that long. I mean, you're not gonna be

831
00:39:33,760 --> 00:39:36,000
Speaker 1: able to buy a house in like six months. That's

832
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,680
Speaker 1: what you're looking for, you know, because he did all

833
00:39:38,680 --> 00:39:41,279
Speaker 1: these other things to raise his credit up with my help,

834
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:44,160
Speaker 1: like you know, pay down your credit cards, pay on time,

835
00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:46,520
Speaker 1: all this kind of stuff, and so his credit score

836
00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:50,000
Speaker 1: is well in the mid seven hundreds. And you know

837
00:39:50,080 --> 00:39:52,759
Speaker 1: that was maybe like I don't know, like but it

838
00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:54,719
Speaker 1: got to mid seven hundreds maybe like a year or

839
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:57,880
Speaker 1: so after him giving back the car. So it was

840
00:39:57,960 --> 00:40:01,000
Speaker 1: worth it because sure enough a year or later, they

841
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:02,239
Speaker 1: were like, yeah, we no longer gonna need you to

842
00:40:02,280 --> 00:40:04,920
Speaker 1: be on call. You have me right now. And I

843
00:40:05,040 --> 00:40:07,360
Speaker 1: was like, you're welcome, and now we're married.

844
00:40:08,480 --> 00:40:10,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, you never right, You may be able to just

845
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:13,800
Speaker 2: afford it now, but you never know what's going to happen. Yes,

846
00:40:14,600 --> 00:40:18,480
Speaker 2: the one thing I'll add to that is that what

847
00:40:18,600 --> 00:40:20,440
Speaker 2: was the one thing I was going to add to that? Okay,

848
00:40:20,480 --> 00:40:23,560
Speaker 2: So she asks what's she's concerned? So she wants to

849
00:40:23,560 --> 00:40:25,160
Speaker 2: buy a house. She's wondering if this is going to

850
00:40:25,239 --> 00:40:27,800
Speaker 2: hurt her credit. But another thing to consider is that

851
00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:30,600
Speaker 2: your debt to income ratio is a huge factor in

852
00:40:30,640 --> 00:40:32,600
Speaker 2: determining whether or not a lender will approve you for

853
00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:35,439
Speaker 2: a mortgage. And if you have this massive car note

854
00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:38,800
Speaker 2: on your on your income or sorry, on your debt sheet,

855
00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:41,920
Speaker 2: or whatever the lender looks at, this is going to

856
00:40:42,040 --> 00:40:44,040
Speaker 2: hurt you, probably just as much as a credit score,

857
00:40:44,080 --> 00:40:47,080
Speaker 2: a low credit score would, if not more. I would

858
00:40:47,080 --> 00:40:49,959
Speaker 2: say so, I would say, that's just all the more

859
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:53,400
Speaker 2: encouragement to get rid of the debt as soon as possible.

860
00:40:53,440 --> 00:40:55,200
Speaker 2: And I mean, I don't know how you're going to

861
00:40:55,239 --> 00:40:57,480
Speaker 2: save for a down payment if you've also got this

862
00:40:57,560 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 2: six hundred dollars car note that you say you can't afford.

863
00:41:00,680 --> 00:41:04,480
Speaker 2: So I think getting this car off your back as

864
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:07,719
Speaker 2: soon as you can, as wisely as you can, is

865
00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:10,680
Speaker 2: probably the right answer, she says. She says, I can't

866
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:13,439
Speaker 2: get it refinanced because the balance is too high. That's

867
00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:16,919
Speaker 2: probably because the the remaining balance on her car note

868
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:20,399
Speaker 2: is worth more than the car. I think that if

869
00:41:20,440 --> 00:41:24,399
Speaker 2: you are if you take the loss, which you're gonna

870
00:41:24,440 --> 00:41:26,400
Speaker 2: have to do either way, if you sell the car,

871
00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:28,839
Speaker 2: if you get it repossessed voluntarily, you'll have to take

872
00:41:28,880 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 2: a loss, and oh the lender or something left over

873
00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:35,000
Speaker 2: if you if another option is maybe get a loan

874
00:41:35,120 --> 00:41:37,680
Speaker 2: from a friend or a family member to maybe pay

875
00:41:37,719 --> 00:41:41,200
Speaker 2: it off enough so that you can refinance or pay it,

876
00:41:41,239 --> 00:41:43,440
Speaker 2: you know, help you cover the balance of whatever is

877
00:41:43,520 --> 00:41:47,400
Speaker 2: left after a voluntary repo or after you sell the car.

878
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,800
Speaker 2: It's just it's like, there's not going to be a nice,

879
00:41:50,880 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 2: neat sort of like answer here where you're gonna end

880
00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:55,799
Speaker 2: up with no debt at the end of it. But

881
00:41:57,040 --> 00:41:59,000
Speaker 2: I feel like the sooner you do this, the better

882
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:04,560
Speaker 2: than keeping this really expensive car. Note, I guess the

883
00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:08,560
Speaker 2: next question is like getting it repossessed or selling it.

884
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:11,640
Speaker 2: I mean, how is she going to get around after that?

885
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:14,719
Speaker 2: She'll have to she'll have to get another car, take

886
00:42:14,719 --> 00:42:16,840
Speaker 2: the prof check the profit from whatever you sell the

887
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:19,080
Speaker 2: car for, and buy a car that's less than that.

888
00:42:19,120 --> 00:42:21,520
Speaker 1: I guess there might not even be a profit, So

889
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:23,040
Speaker 1: you have to think about that, like, what does it

890
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:23,520
Speaker 1: look like.

891
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:26,520
Speaker 2: So well that's true, yeah, yeah, she's underwater. Yeah you know.

892
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:29,799
Speaker 1: So we only had one car for a while as

893
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:32,520
Speaker 1: a result. And then he saved up some money I think,

894
00:42:32,640 --> 00:42:34,680
Speaker 1: and ended up buying a car like a like a

895
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:36,560
Speaker 1: you know, a used car for thirty five hundred that

896
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:39,319
Speaker 1: he drove for a while. It wasn't ideal, but it

897
00:42:39,360 --> 00:42:41,319
Speaker 1: was like it was cash. But you know, that took

898
00:42:41,320 --> 00:42:44,280
Speaker 1: a little while and thankfully we had a two car household,

899
00:42:44,680 --> 00:42:47,560
Speaker 1: so it was it wasn't super easy, but it wasn't

900
00:42:47,760 --> 00:42:50,200
Speaker 1: like impossible. So you want to ask yourself that as well,

901
00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:51,960
Speaker 1: because what you don't want to do, because this is

902
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:54,400
Speaker 1: what they often suggests, is like, oh, well, well we

903
00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:56,360
Speaker 1: could you know, we could roll you over into a

904
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:59,640
Speaker 1: different car, and you're still gonna oh, you know, so

905
00:42:59,640 --> 00:43:01,120
Speaker 1: don't let them convince you of that.

906
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:05,719
Speaker 2: And traded in. That's like the same thing, right, trading in, and.

907
00:43:05,680 --> 00:43:07,839
Speaker 1: Don't try to convince you of that. And you don't

908
00:43:07,880 --> 00:43:10,280
Speaker 1: want to be repossessed either, because you can't afford it,

909
00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:15,480
Speaker 1: like like voluntarily, like giving your car back. It's not great,

910
00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:17,480
Speaker 1: but it's still better than for them to come and

911
00:43:17,520 --> 00:43:19,080
Speaker 1: take it because you miss payin it.

912
00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:24,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a really common problem today, So don't feel bad, Shonda,

913
00:43:25,040 --> 00:43:40,600
Speaker 2: Yeah it is. And thanks for submitting your question. Another question.

914
00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:43,480
Speaker 2: I think we'll end it there. We have eleven minutes.

915
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:46,800
Speaker 2: I'm trying to get you those cookies, man.

916
00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:48,640
Speaker 1: I know, So for those of you who don't know

917
00:43:48,760 --> 00:43:52,240
Speaker 1: I'm trying to get to my vegan cookies from Whole Foods,

918
00:43:52,280 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 1: and Whole Foods closes, you know, not soon, but you

919
00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:57,160
Speaker 1: stood it up. So I told Mandy, I've kind of

920
00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:59,120
Speaker 1: got a hard stop for a good reason, because these

921
00:43:59,200 --> 00:44:02,000
Speaker 1: vegan cookies have been my mind. And I'm babysitting my

922
00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:04,879
Speaker 1: niece tomorrow. She's seven months and I feel like I'm

923
00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:06,640
Speaker 1: going to need a cookie break at some point, so

924
00:44:06,719 --> 00:44:07,600
Speaker 1: I want to be prepared.

925
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:12,200
Speaker 2: Babysitting tips by Tiffany.

926
00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:14,480
Speaker 1: Yes, cookies on hands.

927
00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:17,640
Speaker 2: Oh man. Luckily, no one's asked me to babysit. They're

928
00:44:17,840 --> 00:44:20,359
Speaker 2: small infant, so more power to you. I mean, she's

929
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:21,840
Speaker 2: your niece, so you kind of signed up for that.

930
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:24,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, oh man.

931
00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:26,760
Speaker 2: All right, how about some wins?

932
00:44:27,480 --> 00:44:31,600
Speaker 1: Yes? Lot? So do you want to go first?

933
00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:33,440
Speaker 2: I'd love to go first. I need to throw I

934
00:44:33,520 --> 00:44:36,000
Speaker 2: need to throw a shout out to a fellow Mandy

935
00:44:36,040 --> 00:44:38,680
Speaker 2: in the world. You don't see them too often. So

936
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 2: I read this story about this entrepreneur named Mandy Bowen

937
00:44:42,320 --> 00:44:46,279
Speaker 2: Bowman sorry Bowman, who wanted to make buying black a

938
00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:48,759
Speaker 2: lot easier. I know we got this question a while back, like,

939
00:44:49,160 --> 00:44:51,680
Speaker 2: do you recommend shopping or how do you find Like,

940
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:54,520
Speaker 2: we want to support minority own businesses, black owned businesses,

941
00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:57,680
Speaker 2: but like how do we find them? This young lady

942
00:44:58,440 --> 00:45:02,120
Speaker 2: has created an app called Official Black Wall Street, which

943
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:04,799
Speaker 2: is an app that will alert you when you're near

944
00:45:05,040 --> 00:45:08,879
Speaker 2: by any black owned businesses. And of course, the whole

945
00:45:08,880 --> 00:45:12,640
Speaker 2: emphasis is that she wants to give quality businesses more

946
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:15,920
Speaker 2: exposure and to help customers spend their money within the

947
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:19,160
Speaker 2: black community. And I just saw it. This was awesome,

948
00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:20,280
Speaker 2: So shout out to Mandy.

949
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:24,240
Speaker 1: Yes, Mandy, you're right. You don't see too many Mandy's

950
00:45:24,239 --> 00:45:27,400
Speaker 1: out there in the world. So my shout out actually

951
00:45:27,440 --> 00:45:29,960
Speaker 1: goes to a fellow Wave member. Her name is Yvonne

952
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:34,960
Speaker 1: og aka Molly from Insecure. Woop woop, hey girl. She

953
00:45:35,080 --> 00:45:37,400
Speaker 1: just got nominated for an NAACP Award.

954
00:45:37,600 --> 00:45:44,360
Speaker 2: They all did they yes, And yeah, yeah, I just

955
00:45:44,440 --> 00:45:45,160
Speaker 2: saw that. Awesome.

956
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:47,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I just was like, whoop, whoop, whoop whoop,

957
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:50,440
Speaker 1: just to see, like, you know, just I got to like,

958
00:45:50,760 --> 00:45:53,000
Speaker 1: I mean, of course we're connected via or WhatsApp check,

959
00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:55,200
Speaker 1: but to like, you know, because I never met her

960
00:45:55,239 --> 00:45:58,480
Speaker 1: in person, although we were just cool online, and so

961
00:45:58,719 --> 00:46:01,640
Speaker 1: just to kind of like hear her story and she's awesome,

962
00:46:01,680 --> 00:46:03,400
Speaker 1: like she I didn't realize that she really started her

963
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:05,560
Speaker 1: career as a comedian and she's doing way more stand

964
00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:09,200
Speaker 1: up and stuff now. So I think she's doing something

965
00:46:09,239 --> 00:46:11,279
Speaker 1: at the Barclay Center and Carolines and stuff like that.

966
00:46:11,360 --> 00:46:14,760
Speaker 1: But just to see her like evolution is just dope

967
00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:17,600
Speaker 1: to see and just how chill and how cool and

968
00:46:17,600 --> 00:46:20,799
Speaker 1: how funny as hex she was. And so just to

969
00:46:20,960 --> 00:46:22,400
Speaker 1: you know, I just want to give a little shot.

970
00:46:22,560 --> 00:46:25,200
Speaker 1: I didn't realize they all did. But either way, Hey,

971
00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:29,400
Speaker 1: Wave's girl, Congratulations to you and to your whole cast,

972
00:46:29,960 --> 00:46:34,040
Speaker 1: because Insecure certainly deserves it. I love that you are

973
00:46:34,640 --> 00:46:39,480
Speaker 1: collectively changing the conversation about you know what it is

974
00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:43,480
Speaker 1: to be like Brown. You know that we have regular lives.

975
00:46:43,520 --> 00:46:45,279
Speaker 1: It doesn't always have to be filled with strife and

976
00:46:45,800 --> 00:46:47,520
Speaker 1: crime and this and that, you know what I mean.

977
00:46:47,560 --> 00:46:49,920
Speaker 1: Like Insecure is just like regular life happening. You know.

978
00:46:50,040 --> 00:46:51,400
Speaker 2: I love it. I miss it. So I was just

979
00:46:51,440 --> 00:46:54,200
Speaker 2: thinking how much I missed it the other day when

980
00:46:54,200 --> 00:46:55,919
Speaker 2: I was watching looking for something to watch. I can't

981
00:46:55,920 --> 00:46:59,680
Speaker 2: wait for it to come back. Love it. Yeah, And

982
00:46:59,719 --> 00:47:04,120
Speaker 2: so Lena Waite from She's that One. She's the writer

983
00:47:04,160 --> 00:47:06,239
Speaker 2: who wrote the episode and Master of None that won

984
00:47:06,280 --> 00:47:08,440
Speaker 2: the what do they win? The Golden Globe for the

985
00:47:08,480 --> 00:47:12,840
Speaker 2: episode about coming out to your family at Thanksgiving and

986
00:47:12,880 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 2: they were nominated for NAACP Award two.

987
00:47:15,440 --> 00:47:23,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, Hey insecure, Hey insecure. Oh I feel good. I

988
00:47:23,520 --> 00:47:26,919
Speaker 1: feel very well rested now because.

989
00:47:27,560 --> 00:47:29,840
Speaker 2: I know you did seem a little haggard the last episode.

990
00:47:30,320 --> 00:47:32,759
Speaker 1: I was so haggard. I mean, like, thank goodness, like

991
00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:35,600
Speaker 1: you know, Patrice was just awesome. But like before that,

992
00:47:35,760 --> 00:47:37,319
Speaker 1: like the last couple of weeks, I have been like

993
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:39,640
Speaker 1: I don't know my name, who am I? And I

994
00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:41,600
Speaker 1: feel like this has been the first time in a

995
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:43,920
Speaker 1: few weeks, and I'm like, you know what I mean,

996
00:47:43,920 --> 00:47:45,279
Speaker 1: there is a lot of work to do, but I

997
00:47:45,320 --> 00:47:47,719
Speaker 1: don't feel like I am literally sinking and quick saying.

998
00:47:47,760 --> 00:47:50,840
Speaker 1: I feel like, you know, it's gonna get done. I

999
00:47:50,880 --> 00:47:52,440
Speaker 1: can't wait. Because all day and while it was just

1000
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:55,760
Speaker 1: me and the baby, and I had a choice between

1001
00:47:55,880 --> 00:47:58,640
Speaker 1: my two year old nephew or my seventy seven month

1002
00:47:58,719 --> 00:48:01,080
Speaker 1: old baby, and I wasn't sure which would you have chosen?

1003
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:07,360
Speaker 2: Uh? And uh two seven year old seven month old baby?

1004
00:48:07,520 --> 00:48:09,279
Speaker 1: That's what I was thinking. I was like, ooh, because

1005
00:48:09,280 --> 00:48:12,320
Speaker 1: he's fun because we play, but then he never stops.

1006
00:48:12,560 --> 00:48:14,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, the two year olds, they can run, they can

1007
00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:17,320
Speaker 2: pull things down, they can stick their fingers into sockets

1008
00:48:17,400 --> 00:48:18,200
Speaker 2: like they're a hazard.

1009
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:20,560
Speaker 1: And then but then the baby, you never know. She's

1010
00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:22,480
Speaker 1: a happy baby, but then you're like, ooh, but what

1011
00:48:22,560 --> 00:48:24,239
Speaker 1: is she ends up being fussy because then they never

1012
00:48:24,239 --> 00:48:27,879
Speaker 1: stop crying, and you're like, what do I do? Just yeah,

1013
00:48:27,920 --> 00:48:29,520
Speaker 1: so I just said, you know what, I'm gonna take

1014
00:48:29,560 --> 00:48:32,080
Speaker 1: my because at least there's definitely naps in the horizon

1015
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:34,520
Speaker 1: with her. With him, he's like, I refuse to sleep.

1016
00:48:34,719 --> 00:48:37,560
Speaker 1: So yeah, so I'll you know, I'll give you guys

1017
00:48:37,600 --> 00:48:40,359
Speaker 1: a little update on that. You know how that went.

1018
00:48:40,400 --> 00:48:43,680
Speaker 1: If I survived and we could talk about Thanksgiving? Oh yeah,

1019
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:47,080
Speaker 1: happy Thanksgiving, everybody. You know this will be out right

1020
00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:49,680
Speaker 1: before enjoy and each of your heart's content.

1021
00:48:50,120 --> 00:48:53,160
Speaker 2: Yes, ma'am, Happy Thanksgiving. Forget your diets, I know I have.

1022
00:48:54,680 --> 00:48:56,440
Speaker 1: I can't even eat No, I can't even eat me.

1023
00:48:56,480 --> 00:48:57,880
Speaker 1: I'm afraid of what my stomach will do to me,

1024
00:48:57,960 --> 00:48:59,480
Speaker 1: but I certainly will smell it.

1025
00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:01,759
Speaker 2: Turkey's worth it. Keep on with your veganism.

1026
00:49:04,120 --> 00:49:06,319
Speaker 1: On that note, we've made it cookies for me.

1027
00:49:07,200 --> 00:49:11,160
Speaker 2: Okay, have you Thanksgiving everybody? Go Check us out on Facebook,

1028
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:14,719
Speaker 2: leave us a review on iTunes, Tell your husband, tell

1029
00:49:14,760 --> 00:49:17,400
Speaker 2: your wife, tell your friends about the show. Thank you

1030
00:49:17,440 --> 00:49:22,840
Speaker 2: for your support. Yes, you'll get your cookies.