Speaker 1: Knowing that you have more options than the place you're
Speaker 1: in right now can give you such a sense of security,
Speaker 1: knowing that, hey, even if things go wrong here, I
Speaker 1: have plenty of other places I could go. And often
Speaker 1: what we do is we become so artificially tied to
Speaker 1: where we are that we feel guilty for doing that.
Speaker 1: But the truth is that your work could tell you
Speaker 1: tomorrow that they no longer need your services and not
Speaker 1: feel any guilt at talk. Hey everyone, how are you doing?
Speaker 1: Welcome back to On Purpose, the number one health podcast
Speaker 1: in the world. Thanks to each and every single one
Speaker 1: of you, and I am so happy, so excited that
Speaker 1: we're getting to connect today because this is a subject
Speaker 1: that I think so many people have been struggling with recently,
Speaker 1: and it's stress pressure or any sort of mental weight
Speaker 1: or overwhelm that you're feeling because of work. So, when
Speaker 1: your job is harming your mental health, or when your
Speaker 1: work is harming your mental health, what do you do now?
Speaker 1: I read some really fascinating statistics about mental health and
Speaker 1: work on stress dot org and it talks about how
Speaker 1: eighty three percent of US workers suffer from work related stress.
Speaker 1: Now listen to this. US businesses lose up to three
Speaker 1: hundred billion dollars yearly as a result of workplace stress.
Speaker 1: Stress causes around one million workers to miss work every
Speaker 1: single day. Only forty three percent of US employees think
Speaker 1: their employers care about their work life balance. Now, I'm
Speaker 1: sure that induces a lot of stress just reading that
Speaker 1: that only forty three percent of you think that your
Speaker 1: employer cares about your work life balance. And depression leads
Speaker 1: to fifty one billion dollars in cost due to absenteeism
Speaker 1: and twenty six billion dollars in treatment costs. Work related
Speaker 1: stress causes one hundred and twenty thousand deaths and results
Speaker 1: in one hundred and ninety billion dollars in healthcare costs yearly. Wow,
Speaker 1: the reason I'm showing this to you is not to
Speaker 1: depress you. It's not to bring you down. It's to
Speaker 1: make you aware of how seriously we have to take this.
Speaker 1: You wouldn't fall over, break your ankle or break your
Speaker 1: leg and continue walking on it day after day after
Speaker 1: day thinking that it wasn't important, or that it was normal,
Speaker 1: or that it would be okay. You just wouldn't do that,
Speaker 1: right if you were physically injured, God forbid. But if
Speaker 1: you were physically injured, I'm sure you would take time
Speaker 1: off work. I'm sure you would adapt your saduo, I'm
Speaker 1: sure you'd have conversations to find a better balance. But
Speaker 1: it's incredible how because we can't see our mental health,
Speaker 1: we let it pass by. Because it's not obvious to
Speaker 1: us and obvious to the people around us, we let
Speaker 1: it go. Fifty five percent of Americans are stressed during
Speaker 1: the day, right, and this is twenty percent higher than
Speaker 1: the world average. So this is something to take seriously. Now,
Speaker 1: whether you work for yourself or whether you work for
Speaker 1: a company, this still applies to you because your work
Speaker 1: can still cause you stress. Sometimes entrepreneurs their work causes
Speaker 1: are more stress because there's no clear lines between when
Speaker 1: work starts and one finishes. Right, If you work for yourself,
Speaker 1: even like I do, there is no start time and
Speaker 1: end time. There is no clear boundary between what's workspace
Speaker 1: and what's home space. Often I'm making videos and creating
Speaker 1: content in my home space. So this applies to each
Speaker 1: and every single one of us. I don't want you
Speaker 1: to say this slightly. I'm going to be sharing some
Speaker 1: really useful insights with you about how to think about this.
Speaker 1: So there are two people who recently had to do
Speaker 1: this on the world stage. They had to speak openly
Speaker 1: about what they were experiencing. Now, one of the people
Speaker 1: I'm speaking about is Naomi Osaka, right, and I'm sure
Speaker 1: that whether you follow Tennis or not, she opened up
Speaker 1: about prioritizing her mental health during the French Open and
Speaker 1: that was such an incredible approach and honest, vulnerable way
Speaker 1: of sharing what she was going through and how she
Speaker 1: was struggling with it. And she talked about in an
Speaker 1: interview with Women's Health. She said, growing up being labeled
Speaker 1: a quiet one puts you in a box and even worse,
Speaker 1: makes you stand out when all you want is to
Speaker 1: blend in. But now I try to embrace and own it.
Speaker 1: And she chose to share her intention to step away
Speaker 1: from traditional press obligations on her Instagram, where she has
Speaker 1: two point eight million followers, and in this interview with
Speaker 1: Women's Health, she goes on to say, off all the
Speaker 1: things I do, I find that when I'm doing my
Speaker 1: best to help others, it's the most fulfilling. And so
Speaker 1: it's incredible that she took that stance that she wasn't
Speaker 1: going to do traditional press because she didn't find it
Speaker 1: to be good for her mental health. Now, another great
Speaker 1: example is Simone Biles. And I'm sure that you've been
Speaker 1: following or whether you watch the Olympics or not, this
Speaker 1: was such big news when it happened, and you know,
Speaker 1: Time magazine talked about how the Tokyo Olympics change the
Speaker 1: conversation about mental health, and it's incredible to see someone
Speaker 1: who decided not to participate because they didn't feel well. Now,
Speaker 1: when you think about these examples, they are huge for
Speaker 1: the conversation around mental health. They are absolutely huge. Why
Speaker 1: because we're seeing people who never have been allowed to
Speaker 1: pull out, or have felt ashamed to pull out, or
Speaker 1: would have felt like they were doing something wrong, who
Speaker 1: actually did it when the whole world was watching. And
Speaker 1: guess what, they got criticized for it. There were people
Speaker 1: who didn't agree with them, there were people who laughed,
Speaker 1: there were people who called them weak, But there were
Speaker 1: also so many people who understood their strength. There were
Speaker 1: so many people who recognize just how incredible these individuals were.
Speaker 1: And so for you, I really want you to think
Speaker 1: about this when approaching this podcast. I know it's hard,
Speaker 1: I know it's not easy. I know that you feel
Speaker 1: like everyone will judge you and they won't be able
Speaker 1: to understand you properly, or they'll think you're weak. But
Speaker 1: I want you to recognize that ignoring how you feel
Speaker 1: will only make you weaker. Remember that ignoring how you
Speaker 1: feel will only make you weaker. So what I want
Speaker 1: to share with you today is a few methods of
Speaker 1: what to do when your job is harming your mental health.
Speaker 1: The first thing you want to do is become aware
Speaker 1: of how your work affects your mental health, how your
Speaker 1: work affects your well being, how your work has an
Speaker 1: impact on how you feel. One of the first things
Speaker 1: is job security, or one of the biggest reasons for
Speaker 1: our mental health challenges at work is because of our
Speaker 1: insecurity about what we do. Maybe you're scared that you
Speaker 1: get fired. Maybe you're scared that you'll be made redundant.
Speaker 1: Maybe you're scared that opportunities are going to run out.
Speaker 1: Maybe you're scared that this sponse or a partnership you
Speaker 1: are waiting for is not going to fall through. And
Speaker 1: let me tell you right now, those are all really
Speaker 1: valid concerns. I remember when I worked to a company
Speaker 1: I had that insecurity. What if I don't perform, What
Speaker 1: if I don't get promoted? What if someone does gets
Speaker 1: promoted before me? And I realized when I started working
Speaker 1: for myself that scarcity came with me. It was the
Speaker 1: idea of, well, what if I don't get that partnership,
Speaker 1: if my content doesn't get views, what if this doesn't work?
Speaker 1: How many of you could relate to that? How many
Speaker 1: of you really really resonate with that? So the lack
Speaker 1: of security, whether you work for someone and get paid
Speaker 1: a salary or whether you work for yourself, is real.
Speaker 1: What do you do about it? What do you do
Speaker 1: about it? I've found that one of the things that
Speaker 1: helped me when I was working at a corporate firm
Speaker 1: in the city was having a really up to date
Speaker 1: LinkedIn profile. I would update my LinkedIn profile with all
Speaker 1: my recent experience, recent projects, with an updated picture, and
Speaker 1: I would do this every quarter. So what you realize
Speaker 1: is when you update your LinkedIn profile and keep it
Speaker 1: up to date, you will get an influx of job offers.
Speaker 1: It will happen to you if you keep your LinkedIn
Speaker 1: profile active and up to date, and you're commenting, maybe
Speaker 1: you're even writing an article once in a while. Or
Speaker 1: you're uploading a picture of something that happened at work.
Speaker 1: You are going to constantly have an influx of recruiters
Speaker 1: interested in you. This is going to give you a
Speaker 1: piece of mind like never before. Knowing that you have
Speaker 1: more options than the place you're in right now can
Speaker 1: give you such a sense of security, knowing that, hey,
Speaker 1: even if things go wrong here, I have plenty of
Speaker 1: other places I could go. And often what we do
Speaker 1: is we become so artificially tied to where we are
Speaker 1: that we feel guilty for doing that. But the truth
Speaker 1: is that your work could tell you tomorrow that they
Speaker 1: no longer need your services and not feel any guilt
Speaker 1: at all. And all you're doing is making sure that
Speaker 1: you're presenting yourself effectively to the outside world so that
Speaker 1: people can always be interested in you and aware of
Speaker 1: the work that you do. So when you're worried about
Speaker 1: the security, when you're worried about the feeling or experience
Speaker 1: of is this going to last forever? Remember to keep
Speaker 1: your options open when you're an entrepreneur. I was speaking
Speaker 1: to a friend the other day. He's a coach, and
Speaker 1: he closed a corporate client, and the corporate client was
Speaker 1: closed for a really good fee, and he was really
Speaker 1: excited about it. And I said to him, what I
Speaker 1: want you to do now is use this momentum and
Speaker 1: going close five more clients, going close five more at
Speaker 1: the same rate. I said to him, there are two
Speaker 1: big mistakes entrepreneurs make when it comes to security, and
Speaker 1: I'm going to share them all with you right now.
Speaker 1: Those two right now. The first mistake is that they
Speaker 1: only have one landmark client. They only have one big client.
Speaker 1: So let's say you're a speaker or a coach, you
Speaker 1: only have one big corporate client. Let's say you are
Speaker 1: a website designer, you only have one big client. You're
Speaker 1: a photographer, you only have one big client. When you
Speaker 1: only have one big client, you run the risk of
Speaker 1: that person closing down, that person going bankrupt, that person
Speaker 1: losing their money, that company finding a new agency, of
Speaker 1: setting yourself up to fail. And yes, you may say
Speaker 1: I wish people were more loyal, I wish people cared more,
Speaker 1: but the truth is that's just not how it works.
Speaker 1: So you want to make sure that you are going
Speaker 1: out and repeating that work for other clients. The second
Speaker 1: mistake that entrepreneurs make is they only know one person
Speaker 1: at their client. One of the biggest things I've learned
Speaker 1: is that when I have a client relationship, I need
Speaker 1: to know multiple people that work at their company because
Speaker 1: you never know when your client will leave. You never
Speaker 1: know when that person may move on and do something else.
Speaker 1: You won't know if that person may take maternity leave
Speaker 1: or paternity leave. You just have no idea, And so
Speaker 1: it is so important that you connect with at least
Speaker 1: four people with clients that you work for, even if
Speaker 1: the client is your best friend and closest person. No
Speaker 1: matter what it is, security is a big reason why
Speaker 1: we feel like our work drains us and harms our
Speaker 1: mental health. The other thing to be aware of is
Speaker 1: maybe you haven't been on vacation in a while. Maybe
Speaker 1: it's been a long long time since you actually took
Speaker 1: a break. I want you to take a moment to
Speaker 1: count the amount of days that you have been to
Speaker 1: work without taking an official vacation. Studies show that more
Speaker 1: than half of Americans don't use all of their paid
Speaker 1: vacation days, according to an annual report from the US
Speaker 1: Travel Association Right, and the reason they don't take time
Speaker 1: off is because they're worried about work and they're worried
Speaker 1: that all they're going to do on their time off
Speaker 1: is worry about work. And so this may be your case.
Speaker 1: You may be someone who hasn't taken leave or vacation
Speaker 1: because you're worried about thinking about work on vacation. Well,
Speaker 1: here's the thing. Work will continue, It will always exist.
Speaker 1: There will always be a reason that you think you
Speaker 1: don't have time to take vacation. And the truth is,
Speaker 1: the world is not going to end. Nothing is going
Speaker 1: to be that bad. If you take some good quality
Speaker 1: time for yourself and you come back more productive, more effective,
Speaker 1: and more creative, that you'll be able to catch up
Speaker 1: in no time. Now. Another way to be aware of
Speaker 1: if our work is harmful to our mental health is
Speaker 1: if you're in an atmosphere that you feel is toxic,
Speaker 1: if there's a lot of blame, if there's a lot
Speaker 1: of gossip. That can be a really, really difficult environment
Speaker 1: to work in because you may be sitting there going, jay,
Speaker 1: I don't even know why I'm feeling this way, but
Speaker 1: now you're like, oh, that's what it is. There's a
Speaker 1: lot of negativity around me. If that's the truth for you,
Speaker 1: I really recommend that you speak to a bus, speak
Speaker 1: to a manager and share that with them. I know
Speaker 1: people on my team will share with me if they're
Speaker 1: encountering that with a particular team member or anything around
Speaker 1: us that's going on. I would encourage you to do that,
Speaker 1: to speak to someone openly, to speak to someone vulnerably,
Speaker 1: to connect with someone that you trust at work who
Speaker 1: can hear you out. So that is the first thing
Speaker 1: you need to do if your job is harming your
Speaker 1: mental health is become aware of how. Because if you're
Speaker 1: not aware of how, you can't find a solution. If
Speaker 1: you're not aware that you feel insecure about your job,
Speaker 1: you won't find ways to become secure. If you're not
Speaker 1: aware that you haven't taken vacation for a long time,
Speaker 1: you will forget that. The second thing you have to
Speaker 1: ask yourself is is it truly your work? This is
Speaker 1: a really, really important question to ask. Is it truly
Speaker 1: your work? Sometimes it's our sleep schedule, Sometimes it's something
Speaker 1: happening in our personal life. Sometimes this is because we
Speaker 1: haven't been training or growing or learning or becoming better,
Speaker 1: and that's why our works affecting us. So don't make
Speaker 1: your work the scapegoat. Don't make your work the blame.
Speaker 1: Just as you don't want to be blamed at things
Speaker 1: that you don't do at work. You don't want work
Speaker 1: to just take the blame when actually it's something you
Speaker 1: could control. Maybe you've been hustling really hard on weekends
Speaker 1: or partying really hard on weekends, and then your work
Speaker 1: feels like a drag. So in that scenario, you have
Speaker 1: to identify is it your sleep routine, is it your diet?
Speaker 1: Is it something that you've changed in your life? How
Speaker 1: can you improve that? How can you adjust or edit
Speaker 1: that so that you're no longer in that situation and
Speaker 1: you're no longer challenged or faced with the idea. Sometimes
Speaker 1: work becoming a scapegoat, work becoming the person or place
Speaker 1: we make responsible and blame for our feeling actually stops
Speaker 1: us from dealing with what it actually is. Let's say
Speaker 1: it's actually a sleep routine and you keep blaming work,
Speaker 1: it could take months before you realize, whereas if you
Speaker 1: just be honest with yourself and you say, you know what,
Speaker 1: it's just my sleep schedule needs to change. I realized
Speaker 1: recently sleep was a big one for me and work,
Speaker 1: and also it was the fact that I've been working
Speaker 1: around six and a half days a week, and I
Speaker 1: realized I really needed a two day weekend. I really
Speaker 1: needed to start taking a full two day weekend. So
Speaker 1: it doesn't work. It was the fact that I wasn't
Speaker 1: allowing myself to rest, and it's so important to honor
Speaker 1: that two day weekend. Now, if you're in that build
Speaker 1: phase where you're building your passion or you're hustling, your
Speaker 1: weekend maybe compromised. But as you're growing, you want to
Speaker 1: start taking that weekend back to be truly being rest
Speaker 1: and refuel. And a lot of things that we can
Speaker 1: do for rest and refuel are not things we expect.
Speaker 1: I used to think that rest and refuel meant a
Speaker 1: massage or a spa, and I've realized that rest and
Speaker 1: refuel really means getting a cold plunge and doing an
Speaker 1: infrared sauna. Now, I'll be honest with you, every week,
Speaker 1: before I go to do that, my mind is saying, Jay,
Speaker 1: you don't want to do that. You want something more relaxing.
Speaker 1: It's hard work, and I've realized that if I choose
Speaker 1: anything else, Let's say I choose a brunch. Let's say
Speaker 1: I choose eating a nice brunch, right, or let's say
Speaker 1: I choose going to get that spa massage or whatever
Speaker 1: it is. It never affects me the same a hike
Speaker 1: followed by infrared sauna and a cold plunge. There's more
Speaker 1: for me mentally and physically, So make sure what you're
Speaker 1: doing to rest and refuel is actually doing just that.
Speaker 1: We have to start training like an athlete. We have
Speaker 1: to start thinking of ourselves like an athlete. I was
Speaker 1: speaking a friend recently, and he works in an extremely
Speaker 1: stressful career, and his career means he's often working around
Speaker 1: the clock, and I said to him, you know, you're
Speaker 1: working as hard as some of the top athletes in
Speaker 1: the world, but you're not treating yourself like an athlete.
Speaker 1: You're not making sure you have a meal plan, You're
Speaker 1: not making sure that you have an exercise plan like,
Speaker 1: you're not taking care of yourself to the degree of
Speaker 1: stress you have to deal with. You'll be surprised as
Speaker 1: to how much stress the human mind can take on
Speaker 1: when you feel prepared and when you feel connected, as
Speaker 1: opposed to when you just keep taking more and more
Speaker 1: stress on but you're not really truly aware. So I
Speaker 1: want you to start treating yourself like an athlete and
Speaker 1: training yourself like an athlete when it comes to thinking
Speaker 1: about what is really affecting your mental health. The third
Speaker 1: is become an ambassador for mental health in the world place.
Speaker 1: The workplace needs more mental health ambassadors. The workplace needs
Speaker 1: individuals like you to advocate for others. And I recently
Speaker 1: have been doing so many internal keynotes and events with
Speaker 1: corporations where one of you has seen one of my videos,
Speaker 1: one of you has heard one of my podcasts, one
Speaker 1: of you has seen one of my interviews on the
Speaker 1: Today Show or wherever it is, and you've said to
Speaker 1: your company that we need to focus on our mental health.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I've even come into your organizations to give the
Speaker 1: keynote and presentation because of that. And that's what I've
Speaker 1: found so fascinating that it is people like you inside
Speaker 1: a company that can advocate for mental health. When I
Speaker 1: worked at Accenture, I was one of those people, and
Speaker 1: I started meditation mondays. I started afternoon evening lunch meditation sessions.
Speaker 1: It was my way of trying to help my friends
Speaker 1: and advocate and has support them and to be able
Speaker 1: to share what I knew about the space. We would
Speaker 1: even invite experts and psychologists and teachers into the space.
Speaker 1: So I want you to really consider that, how can
Speaker 1: you become a mental health ambassador at work? How can
Speaker 1: you take on the mantle. You may be feeling like
Speaker 1: your company doesn't care, you may be feeling like the
Speaker 1: people around you don't care. How can you show that
Speaker 1: you care? How can you take that step and make
Speaker 1: a difference in the workplace based on the experience that
Speaker 1: you've been having. One of the reasons why we feel
Speaker 1: a lot of mental health challenges at work is because
Speaker 1: we compare ourselves to others. But just as on Instagram
Speaker 1: you compare yourself to people's highlight reels, at work, you're
Speaker 1: just comparing yourself to how someone appears. You're comparing yourself
Speaker 1: to how they look. You're comparing yourself to the suit
Speaker 1: they wear, You're comparing yourself to their performance. You have
Speaker 1: no idea what's happening in their personal life. And the
Speaker 1: truth is, when something does happen in their personal life,
Speaker 1: you go, oh, yeah, they always work too hard, and
Speaker 1: look what happened in their personal life. But that's not
Speaker 1: what we need to do. We don't need to criticize,
Speaker 1: we don't need to compare. We need to check in
Speaker 1: with ourselves and say, what is my capacity? What capacity
Speaker 1: do I want to have, what results do I want
Speaker 1: to have, and what capacity does that demand? Right, Like,
Speaker 1: I know that there have been times in my life
Speaker 1: where i have burned the candle at both ends, but
Speaker 1: I've done it consciously. I've known that I'm going after
Speaker 1: a certain goal and result and I'm ready to do it.
Speaker 1: And there have been times in my life where I've
Speaker 1: totally stepped back and taken a break and just accepted
Speaker 1: that that isn't the place I want to work at.
Speaker 1: And so the fourth step is take the time off
Speaker 1: if you need it. Don't be afraid to take time off.
Speaker 1: I think so many people are scared of doing that,
Speaker 1: but actually sometimes that's the only answer. It's totally okay,
Speaker 1: it's totally valid, and it gives you the time and
Speaker 1: space to figure out whether it's the job, whether it's you,
Speaker 1: whether you can handle it or not. And that space
Speaker 1: can actually give you the distance you need to make
Speaker 1: a healthier decision. Right, the distance can help you make
Speaker 1: a healthier decision. You don't have to quit now. The
Speaker 1: fifth step is being careful about how much you take
Speaker 1: on and the way you do. This is when you
Speaker 1: ask to take something new on. Speak to your manager
Speaker 1: and say, hey, this is what I'm working on right now.
Speaker 1: Where does this sit in the priority list? And they
Speaker 1: may even say, oh, I didn't realize you had so
Speaker 1: much on Okay, I'll find someone else to that, or
Speaker 1: they may say, oh, it's number three, don't worry about it.
Speaker 1: The mistake you make when you accept responsibility without priority
Speaker 1: is that you set yourself up for misery right. Never
Speaker 1: take on responsibility without knowing its priority and making someone
Speaker 1: aware of all your other responsibilities. By the way, this
Speaker 1: even applies at home. This even applies with your partner,
Speaker 1: making them aware and being aware. And sometimes you're not
Speaker 1: even aware of how many things you do. Literally, take
Speaker 1: a moment to write down everything you do professionally and
Speaker 1: everything you do personally right now, and when you next
Speaker 1: speak to someone, you don't have to read it with bitterness.
Speaker 1: You have to share. By the way, I just want
Speaker 1: you to know I'm doing all of this stuff. I'm
Speaker 1: not sure I can do more right or when you're
Speaker 1: asked to do more, say I'm doing all of this.
Speaker 1: Where does this one fit in? It's so important? And
Speaker 1: the sixth and final step I want to encourage all
Speaker 1: of you to do is make sure that you speak
Speaker 1: to someone. Make sure that you take that opportunity to
Speaker 1: connect with someone. I think so often we suffer alone.
Speaker 1: We think telling someone about how we feel makes us weak.
Speaker 1: So much of this is related to how we think
Speaker 1: we're going to look. Isn't that just fascinating? So much
Speaker 1: of this it's related to how we think we're going
Speaker 1: to look. But guess what, when you're struggling and you
Speaker 1: won't even be able to look at yourself properly, you
Speaker 1: won't be able to deal with that properly. And so
Speaker 1: I want you to be really, really aware that you
Speaker 1: can't just let people's opinions and how you think people
Speaker 1: will feel about you affect how you feel about yourself.
Speaker 1: Your feelings about yourself, your relationship with about yourself are
Speaker 1: the most important things that you could potentially think about,
Speaker 1: And for so many of us, we completely let our
Speaker 1: whole life be governed by how we think people will
Speaker 1: think about what we choose to do. If your team
Speaker 1: thinks you're weak, it doesn't make you weaker. And we
Speaker 1: also have to learn to find the support to destigma
Speaker 1: ties mental health. We have to think about mental health
Speaker 1: how we do physical health. So I hope this has
Speaker 1: giving you some insights and some advice and some things
Speaker 1: to think about. Overall, I always recommend checking with a
Speaker 1: doctor and a psychiatrist. I'm not giving medical advice that
Speaker 1: I'm giving advice and helping you become aware of some
Speaker 1: of the big challenges. I've got your back, I'm on
Speaker 1: your side, and i can't wait to see how your
Speaker 1: life changes when you implement some of these ideas. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much, sending you so much love.