1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,600 Speaker 1: Knowing that you have more options than the place you're 2 00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:05,720 Speaker 1: in right now can give you such a sense of security, 3 00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:08,880 Speaker 1: knowing that, hey, even if things go wrong here, I 4 00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:11,880 Speaker 1: have plenty of other places I could go. And often 5 00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:16,319 Speaker 1: what we do is we become so artificially tied to 6 00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:18,720 Speaker 1: where we are that we feel guilty for doing that. 7 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:22,200 Speaker 1: But the truth is that your work could tell you 8 00:00:22,239 --> 00:00:25,239 Speaker 1: tomorrow that they no longer need your services and not 9 00:00:25,280 --> 00:00:34,440 Speaker 1: feel any guilt at talk. Hey everyone, how are you doing? 10 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:38,000 Speaker 1: Welcome back to On Purpose, the number one health podcast 11 00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:41,519 Speaker 1: in the world. Thanks to each and every single one 12 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:45,600 Speaker 1: of you, and I am so happy, so excited that 13 00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:49,640 Speaker 1: we're getting to connect today because this is a subject 14 00:00:49,680 --> 00:00:53,159 Speaker 1: that I think so many people have been struggling with recently, 15 00:00:53,960 --> 00:01:00,480 Speaker 1: and it's stress pressure or any sort of mental weight 16 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:05,560 Speaker 1: or overwhelm that you're feeling because of work. So, when 17 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:08,480 Speaker 1: your job is harming your mental health, or when your 18 00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:13,120 Speaker 1: work is harming your mental health, what do you do now? 19 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:17,520 Speaker 1: I read some really fascinating statistics about mental health and 20 00:01:17,600 --> 00:01:21,600 Speaker 1: work on stress dot org and it talks about how 21 00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:26,759 Speaker 1: eighty three percent of US workers suffer from work related stress. 22 00:01:27,440 --> 00:01:31,680 Speaker 1: Now listen to this. US businesses lose up to three 23 00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:37,160 Speaker 1: hundred billion dollars yearly as a result of workplace stress. 24 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:41,720 Speaker 1: Stress causes around one million workers to miss work every 25 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:46,880 Speaker 1: single day. Only forty three percent of US employees think 26 00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: their employers care about their work life balance. Now, I'm 27 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:54,240 Speaker 1: sure that induces a lot of stress just reading that 28 00:01:54,240 --> 00:01:57,480 Speaker 1: that only forty three percent of you think that your 29 00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:02,760 Speaker 1: employer cares about your work life balance. And depression leads 30 00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:07,280 Speaker 1: to fifty one billion dollars in cost due to absenteeism 31 00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 1: and twenty six billion dollars in treatment costs. Work related 32 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:16,440 Speaker 1: stress causes one hundred and twenty thousand deaths and results 33 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:21,600 Speaker 1: in one hundred and ninety billion dollars in healthcare costs yearly. Wow, 34 00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,840 Speaker 1: the reason I'm showing this to you is not to 35 00:02:24,919 --> 00:02:27,800 Speaker 1: depress you. It's not to bring you down. It's to 36 00:02:27,919 --> 00:02:31,360 Speaker 1: make you aware of how seriously we have to take this. 37 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:36,680 Speaker 1: You wouldn't fall over, break your ankle or break your 38 00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:41,040 Speaker 1: leg and continue walking on it day after day after 39 00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:45,639 Speaker 1: day thinking that it wasn't important, or that it was normal, 40 00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:49,600 Speaker 1: or that it would be okay. You just wouldn't do that, 41 00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:53,359 Speaker 1: right if you were physically injured, God forbid. But if 42 00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:57,400 Speaker 1: you were physically injured, I'm sure you would take time 43 00:02:57,400 --> 00:03:00,959 Speaker 1: off work. I'm sure you would adapt your saduo, I'm 44 00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:05,440 Speaker 1: sure you'd have conversations to find a better balance. But 45 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:08,680 Speaker 1: it's incredible how because we can't see our mental health, 46 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:12,800 Speaker 1: we let it pass by. Because it's not obvious to 47 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:15,440 Speaker 1: us and obvious to the people around us, we let 48 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:19,800 Speaker 1: it go. Fifty five percent of Americans are stressed during 49 00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:24,799 Speaker 1: the day, right, and this is twenty percent higher than 50 00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:29,480 Speaker 1: the world average. So this is something to take seriously. Now, 51 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:32,600 Speaker 1: whether you work for yourself or whether you work for 52 00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:35,880 Speaker 1: a company, this still applies to you because your work 53 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:39,480 Speaker 1: can still cause you stress. Sometimes entrepreneurs their work causes 54 00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:41,960 Speaker 1: are more stress because there's no clear lines between when 55 00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 1: work starts and one finishes. Right, If you work for yourself, 56 00:03:45,040 --> 00:03:47,840 Speaker 1: even like I do, there is no start time and 57 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:51,960 Speaker 1: end time. There is no clear boundary between what's workspace 58 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:54,880 Speaker 1: and what's home space. Often I'm making videos and creating 59 00:03:54,880 --> 00:03:58,640 Speaker 1: content in my home space. So this applies to each 60 00:03:58,680 --> 00:04:00,640 Speaker 1: and every single one of us. I don't want you 61 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:02,760 Speaker 1: to say this slightly. I'm going to be sharing some 62 00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:05,920 Speaker 1: really useful insights with you about how to think about this. 63 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,760 Speaker 1: So there are two people who recently had to do 64 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:14,440 Speaker 1: this on the world stage. They had to speak openly 65 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:18,839 Speaker 1: about what they were experiencing. Now, one of the people 66 00:04:18,839 --> 00:04:23,440 Speaker 1: I'm speaking about is Naomi Osaka, right, and I'm sure 67 00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:27,279 Speaker 1: that whether you follow Tennis or not, she opened up 68 00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:31,240 Speaker 1: about prioritizing her mental health during the French Open and 69 00:04:31,760 --> 00:04:39,320 Speaker 1: that was such an incredible approach and honest, vulnerable way 70 00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:42,560 Speaker 1: of sharing what she was going through and how she 71 00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:45,080 Speaker 1: was struggling with it. And she talked about in an 72 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:48,159 Speaker 1: interview with Women's Health. She said, growing up being labeled 73 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:51,400 Speaker 1: a quiet one puts you in a box and even worse, 74 00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:54,040 Speaker 1: makes you stand out when all you want is to 75 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,480 Speaker 1: blend in. But now I try to embrace and own it. 76 00:04:58,480 --> 00:05:01,839 Speaker 1: And she chose to share her intention to step away 77 00:05:02,240 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 1: from traditional press obligations on her Instagram, where she has 78 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:09,240 Speaker 1: two point eight million followers, and in this interview with 79 00:05:09,279 --> 00:05:12,240 Speaker 1: Women's Health, she goes on to say, off all the 80 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:14,520 Speaker 1: things I do, I find that when I'm doing my 81 00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:18,640 Speaker 1: best to help others, it's the most fulfilling. And so 82 00:05:18,680 --> 00:05:21,000 Speaker 1: it's incredible that she took that stance that she wasn't 83 00:05:21,040 --> 00:05:24,640 Speaker 1: going to do traditional press because she didn't find it 84 00:05:24,640 --> 00:05:27,680 Speaker 1: to be good for her mental health. Now, another great 85 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:32,480 Speaker 1: example is Simone Biles. And I'm sure that you've been 86 00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:35,240 Speaker 1: following or whether you watch the Olympics or not, this 87 00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:38,800 Speaker 1: was such big news when it happened, and you know, 88 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:41,839 Speaker 1: Time magazine talked about how the Tokyo Olympics change the 89 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:46,279 Speaker 1: conversation about mental health, and it's incredible to see someone 90 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:49,680 Speaker 1: who decided not to participate because they didn't feel well. Now, 91 00:05:49,920 --> 00:05:53,039 Speaker 1: when you think about these examples, they are huge for 92 00:05:53,080 --> 00:05:57,919 Speaker 1: the conversation around mental health. They are absolutely huge. Why 93 00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:01,039 Speaker 1: because we're seeing people who never have been allowed to 94 00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:03,880 Speaker 1: pull out, or have felt ashamed to pull out, or 95 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:06,560 Speaker 1: would have felt like they were doing something wrong, who 96 00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:09,440 Speaker 1: actually did it when the whole world was watching. And 97 00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:11,920 Speaker 1: guess what, they got criticized for it. There were people 98 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,960 Speaker 1: who didn't agree with them, there were people who laughed, 99 00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:16,720 Speaker 1: there were people who called them weak, But there were 100 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:20,040 Speaker 1: also so many people who understood their strength. There were 101 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:24,200 Speaker 1: so many people who recognize just how incredible these individuals were. 102 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:27,320 Speaker 1: And so for you, I really want you to think 103 00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:31,320 Speaker 1: about this when approaching this podcast. I know it's hard, 104 00:06:32,279 --> 00:06:34,880 Speaker 1: I know it's not easy. I know that you feel 105 00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:38,360 Speaker 1: like everyone will judge you and they won't be able 106 00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:41,880 Speaker 1: to understand you properly, or they'll think you're weak. But 107 00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:45,320 Speaker 1: I want you to recognize that ignoring how you feel 108 00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:49,840 Speaker 1: will only make you weaker. Remember that ignoring how you 109 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:53,800 Speaker 1: feel will only make you weaker. So what I want 110 00:06:53,800 --> 00:06:56,599 Speaker 1: to share with you today is a few methods of 111 00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:59,359 Speaker 1: what to do when your job is harming your mental health. 112 00:07:00,440 --> 00:07:03,520 Speaker 1: The first thing you want to do is become aware 113 00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:09,840 Speaker 1: of how your work affects your mental health, how your 114 00:07:09,880 --> 00:07:14,840 Speaker 1: work affects your well being, how your work has an 115 00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:18,240 Speaker 1: impact on how you feel. One of the first things 116 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:21,600 Speaker 1: is job security, or one of the biggest reasons for 117 00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:24,040 Speaker 1: our mental health challenges at work is because of our 118 00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 1: insecurity about what we do. Maybe you're scared that you 119 00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:30,640 Speaker 1: get fired. Maybe you're scared that you'll be made redundant. 120 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:34,280 Speaker 1: Maybe you're scared that opportunities are going to run out. 121 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:36,920 Speaker 1: Maybe you're scared that this sponse or a partnership you 122 00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:39,320 Speaker 1: are waiting for is not going to fall through. And 123 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 1: let me tell you right now, those are all really 124 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:44,640 Speaker 1: valid concerns. I remember when I worked to a company 125 00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:47,120 Speaker 1: I had that insecurity. What if I don't perform, What 126 00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:49,440 Speaker 1: if I don't get promoted? What if someone does gets 127 00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:52,560 Speaker 1: promoted before me? And I realized when I started working 128 00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:56,200 Speaker 1: for myself that scarcity came with me. It was the 129 00:07:56,280 --> 00:07:59,440 Speaker 1: idea of, well, what if I don't get that partnership, 130 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:02,720 Speaker 1: if my content doesn't get views, what if this doesn't work? 131 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,000 Speaker 1: How many of you could relate to that? How many 132 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:08,560 Speaker 1: of you really really resonate with that? So the lack 133 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:11,160 Speaker 1: of security, whether you work for someone and get paid 134 00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:13,600 Speaker 1: a salary or whether you work for yourself, is real. 135 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:16,560 Speaker 1: What do you do about it? What do you do 136 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:20,320 Speaker 1: about it? I've found that one of the things that 137 00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:24,720 Speaker 1: helped me when I was working at a corporate firm 138 00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:29,960 Speaker 1: in the city was having a really up to date 139 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:34,160 Speaker 1: LinkedIn profile. I would update my LinkedIn profile with all 140 00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:39,040 Speaker 1: my recent experience, recent projects, with an updated picture, and 141 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:42,240 Speaker 1: I would do this every quarter. So what you realize 142 00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:44,880 Speaker 1: is when you update your LinkedIn profile and keep it 143 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:48,120 Speaker 1: up to date, you will get an influx of job offers. 144 00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:51,320 Speaker 1: It will happen to you if you keep your LinkedIn 145 00:08:51,360 --> 00:08:55,400 Speaker 1: profile active and up to date, and you're commenting, maybe 146 00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:57,839 Speaker 1: you're even writing an article once in a while. Or 147 00:08:57,880 --> 00:08:59,960 Speaker 1: you're uploading a picture of something that happened at work. 148 00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:03,560 Speaker 1: You are going to constantly have an influx of recruiters 149 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:06,680 Speaker 1: interested in you. This is going to give you a 150 00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:10,480 Speaker 1: piece of mind like never before. Knowing that you have 151 00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:13,280 Speaker 1: more options than the place you're in right now can 152 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:16,240 Speaker 1: give you such a sense of security, knowing that, hey, 153 00:09:16,559 --> 00:09:19,000 Speaker 1: even if things go wrong here, I have plenty of 154 00:09:19,040 --> 00:09:22,000 Speaker 1: other places I could go. And often what we do 155 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:26,400 Speaker 1: is we become so artificially tied to where we are 156 00:09:26,679 --> 00:09:29,600 Speaker 1: that we feel guilty for doing that. But the truth 157 00:09:29,760 --> 00:09:32,719 Speaker 1: is that your work could tell you tomorrow that they 158 00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:35,440 Speaker 1: no longer need your services and not feel any guilt 159 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:38,480 Speaker 1: at all. And all you're doing is making sure that 160 00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:43,280 Speaker 1: you're presenting yourself effectively to the outside world so that 161 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:45,920 Speaker 1: people can always be interested in you and aware of 162 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:49,080 Speaker 1: the work that you do. So when you're worried about 163 00:09:49,120 --> 00:09:55,319 Speaker 1: the security, when you're worried about the feeling or experience 164 00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:59,320 Speaker 1: of is this going to last forever? Remember to keep 165 00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:03,040 Speaker 1: your options open when you're an entrepreneur. I was speaking 166 00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:05,480 Speaker 1: to a friend the other day. He's a coach, and 167 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:08,600 Speaker 1: he closed a corporate client, and the corporate client was 168 00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:11,320 Speaker 1: closed for a really good fee, and he was really 169 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:13,560 Speaker 1: excited about it. And I said to him, what I 170 00:10:13,559 --> 00:10:15,760 Speaker 1: want you to do now is use this momentum and 171 00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:20,080 Speaker 1: going close five more clients, going close five more at 172 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,800 Speaker 1: the same rate. I said to him, there are two 173 00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:26,440 Speaker 1: big mistakes entrepreneurs make when it comes to security, and 174 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:28,000 Speaker 1: I'm going to share them all with you right now. 175 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:31,559 Speaker 1: Those two right now. The first mistake is that they 176 00:10:31,679 --> 00:10:37,360 Speaker 1: only have one landmark client. They only have one big client. 177 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:40,080 Speaker 1: So let's say you're a speaker or a coach, you 178 00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:42,880 Speaker 1: only have one big corporate client. Let's say you are 179 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:45,400 Speaker 1: a website designer, you only have one big client. You're 180 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:48,200 Speaker 1: a photographer, you only have one big client. When you 181 00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:51,080 Speaker 1: only have one big client, you run the risk of 182 00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:56,000 Speaker 1: that person closing down, that person going bankrupt, that person 183 00:10:56,080 --> 00:11:00,040 Speaker 1: losing their money, that company finding a new agency, of 184 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:02,559 Speaker 1: setting yourself up to fail. And yes, you may say 185 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,040 Speaker 1: I wish people were more loyal, I wish people cared more, 186 00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,560 Speaker 1: but the truth is that's just not how it works. 187 00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:11,080 Speaker 1: So you want to make sure that you are going 188 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:15,120 Speaker 1: out and repeating that work for other clients. The second 189 00:11:15,120 --> 00:11:19,000 Speaker 1: mistake that entrepreneurs make is they only know one person 190 00:11:19,559 --> 00:11:22,800 Speaker 1: at their client. One of the biggest things I've learned 191 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:25,400 Speaker 1: is that when I have a client relationship, I need 192 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:28,240 Speaker 1: to know multiple people that work at their company because 193 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:30,800 Speaker 1: you never know when your client will leave. You never 194 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:33,160 Speaker 1: know when that person may move on and do something else. 195 00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:37,280 Speaker 1: You won't know if that person may take maternity leave 196 00:11:37,360 --> 00:11:40,760 Speaker 1: or paternity leave. You just have no idea, And so 197 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:44,560 Speaker 1: it is so important that you connect with at least 198 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:47,319 Speaker 1: four people with clients that you work for, even if 199 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:49,280 Speaker 1: the client is your best friend and closest person. No 200 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:53,160 Speaker 1: matter what it is, security is a big reason why 201 00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:56,360 Speaker 1: we feel like our work drains us and harms our 202 00:11:56,360 --> 00:11:58,760 Speaker 1: mental health. The other thing to be aware of is 203 00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,360 Speaker 1: maybe you haven't been on vacation in a while. Maybe 204 00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:04,520 Speaker 1: it's been a long long time since you actually took 205 00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:07,360 Speaker 1: a break. I want you to take a moment to 206 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,040 Speaker 1: count the amount of days that you have been to 207 00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:15,080 Speaker 1: work without taking an official vacation. Studies show that more 208 00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:18,120 Speaker 1: than half of Americans don't use all of their paid 209 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:21,720 Speaker 1: vacation days, according to an annual report from the US 210 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:26,000 Speaker 1: Travel Association Right, and the reason they don't take time 211 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,360 Speaker 1: off is because they're worried about work and they're worried 212 00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:29,920 Speaker 1: that all they're going to do on their time off 213 00:12:30,080 --> 00:12:33,880 Speaker 1: is worry about work. And so this may be your case. 214 00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:37,079 Speaker 1: You may be someone who hasn't taken leave or vacation 215 00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:41,360 Speaker 1: because you're worried about thinking about work on vacation. Well, 216 00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:45,960 Speaker 1: here's the thing. Work will continue, It will always exist. 217 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:48,360 Speaker 1: There will always be a reason that you think you 218 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:51,400 Speaker 1: don't have time to take vacation. And the truth is, 219 00:12:51,559 --> 00:12:55,040 Speaker 1: the world is not going to end. Nothing is going 220 00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 1: to be that bad. If you take some good quality 221 00:12:57,120 --> 00:13:00,640 Speaker 1: time for yourself and you come back more productive, more effective, 222 00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:02,920 Speaker 1: and more creative, that you'll be able to catch up 223 00:13:02,920 --> 00:13:05,480 Speaker 1: in no time. Now. Another way to be aware of 224 00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:08,520 Speaker 1: if our work is harmful to our mental health is 225 00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:10,800 Speaker 1: if you're in an atmosphere that you feel is toxic, 226 00:13:11,120 --> 00:13:13,360 Speaker 1: if there's a lot of blame, if there's a lot 227 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:16,840 Speaker 1: of gossip. That can be a really, really difficult environment 228 00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:19,800 Speaker 1: to work in because you may be sitting there going, jay, 229 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:21,559 Speaker 1: I don't even know why I'm feeling this way, but 230 00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:23,640 Speaker 1: now you're like, oh, that's what it is. There's a 231 00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:26,920 Speaker 1: lot of negativity around me. If that's the truth for you, 232 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:29,959 Speaker 1: I really recommend that you speak to a bus, speak 233 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:32,000 Speaker 1: to a manager and share that with them. I know 234 00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:34,359 Speaker 1: people on my team will share with me if they're 235 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:37,760 Speaker 1: encountering that with a particular team member or anything around 236 00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:40,280 Speaker 1: us that's going on. I would encourage you to do that, 237 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:43,520 Speaker 1: to speak to someone openly, to speak to someone vulnerably, 238 00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:46,600 Speaker 1: to connect with someone that you trust at work who 239 00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:49,640 Speaker 1: can hear you out. So that is the first thing 240 00:13:49,679 --> 00:13:51,880 Speaker 1: you need to do if your job is harming your 241 00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:57,160 Speaker 1: mental health is become aware of how. Because if you're 242 00:13:57,200 --> 00:13:59,400 Speaker 1: not aware of how, you can't find a solution. If 243 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:03,319 Speaker 1: you're not aware that you feel insecure about your job, 244 00:14:03,440 --> 00:14:06,160 Speaker 1: you won't find ways to become secure. If you're not 245 00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,280 Speaker 1: aware that you haven't taken vacation for a long time, 246 00:14:08,320 --> 00:14:10,920 Speaker 1: you will forget that. The second thing you have to 247 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:14,840 Speaker 1: ask yourself is is it truly your work? This is 248 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:18,960 Speaker 1: a really, really important question to ask. Is it truly 249 00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:24,200 Speaker 1: your work? Sometimes it's our sleep schedule, Sometimes it's something 250 00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:26,960 Speaker 1: happening in our personal life. Sometimes this is because we 251 00:14:27,040 --> 00:14:30,240 Speaker 1: haven't been training or growing or learning or becoming better, 252 00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:34,120 Speaker 1: and that's why our works affecting us. So don't make 253 00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:38,160 Speaker 1: your work the scapegoat. Don't make your work the blame. 254 00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:39,920 Speaker 1: Just as you don't want to be blamed at things 255 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:41,680 Speaker 1: that you don't do at work. You don't want work 256 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:44,240 Speaker 1: to just take the blame when actually it's something you 257 00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:47,440 Speaker 1: could control. Maybe you've been hustling really hard on weekends 258 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:50,240 Speaker 1: or partying really hard on weekends, and then your work 259 00:14:50,240 --> 00:14:54,760 Speaker 1: feels like a drag. So in that scenario, you have 260 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:58,200 Speaker 1: to identify is it your sleep routine, is it your diet? 261 00:14:58,680 --> 00:15:01,680 Speaker 1: Is it something that you've changed in your life? How 262 00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:04,800 Speaker 1: can you improve that? How can you adjust or edit 263 00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:08,160 Speaker 1: that so that you're no longer in that situation and 264 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:13,040 Speaker 1: you're no longer challenged or faced with the idea. Sometimes 265 00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:16,960 Speaker 1: work becoming a scapegoat, work becoming the person or place 266 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:21,120 Speaker 1: we make responsible and blame for our feeling actually stops 267 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,720 Speaker 1: us from dealing with what it actually is. Let's say 268 00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:25,960 Speaker 1: it's actually a sleep routine and you keep blaming work, 269 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,920 Speaker 1: it could take months before you realize, whereas if you 270 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:30,680 Speaker 1: just be honest with yourself and you say, you know what, 271 00:15:30,760 --> 00:15:34,200 Speaker 1: it's just my sleep schedule needs to change. I realized 272 00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:37,400 Speaker 1: recently sleep was a big one for me and work, 273 00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:40,600 Speaker 1: and also it was the fact that I've been working 274 00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:43,080 Speaker 1: around six and a half days a week, and I 275 00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 1: realized I really needed a two day weekend. I really 276 00:15:46,840 --> 00:15:49,120 Speaker 1: needed to start taking a full two day weekend. So 277 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:51,520 Speaker 1: it doesn't work. It was the fact that I wasn't 278 00:15:51,560 --> 00:15:55,200 Speaker 1: allowing myself to rest, and it's so important to honor 279 00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:58,040 Speaker 1: that two day weekend. Now, if you're in that build 280 00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,600 Speaker 1: phase where you're building your passion or you're hustling, your 281 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:03,720 Speaker 1: weekend maybe compromised. But as you're growing, you want to 282 00:16:03,720 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 1: start taking that weekend back to be truly being rest 283 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:09,520 Speaker 1: and refuel. And a lot of things that we can 284 00:16:09,520 --> 00:16:12,400 Speaker 1: do for rest and refuel are not things we expect. 285 00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:15,040 Speaker 1: I used to think that rest and refuel meant a 286 00:16:15,080 --> 00:16:17,840 Speaker 1: massage or a spa, and I've realized that rest and 287 00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:22,280 Speaker 1: refuel really means getting a cold plunge and doing an 288 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:26,200 Speaker 1: infrared sauna. Now, I'll be honest with you, every week, 289 00:16:26,440 --> 00:16:29,880 Speaker 1: before I go to do that, my mind is saying, Jay, 290 00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:32,320 Speaker 1: you don't want to do that. You want something more relaxing. 291 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:35,800 Speaker 1: It's hard work, and I've realized that if I choose 292 00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:38,480 Speaker 1: anything else, Let's say I choose a brunch. Let's say 293 00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:41,480 Speaker 1: I choose eating a nice brunch, right, or let's say 294 00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:44,080 Speaker 1: I choose going to get that spa massage or whatever 295 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:47,240 Speaker 1: it is. It never affects me the same a hike 296 00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:50,720 Speaker 1: followed by infrared sauna and a cold plunge. There's more 297 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,600 Speaker 1: for me mentally and physically, So make sure what you're 298 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:56,400 Speaker 1: doing to rest and refuel is actually doing just that. 299 00:16:57,080 --> 00:16:59,920 Speaker 1: We have to start training like an athlete. We have 300 00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:02,240 Speaker 1: to start thinking of ourselves like an athlete. I was 301 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:05,200 Speaker 1: speaking a friend recently, and he works in an extremely 302 00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:09,240 Speaker 1: stressful career, and his career means he's often working around 303 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:12,560 Speaker 1: the clock, and I said to him, you know, you're 304 00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:15,760 Speaker 1: working as hard as some of the top athletes in 305 00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:19,160 Speaker 1: the world, but you're not treating yourself like an athlete. 306 00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:22,440 Speaker 1: You're not making sure you have a meal plan, You're 307 00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:25,040 Speaker 1: not making sure that you have an exercise plan like, 308 00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:28,159 Speaker 1: you're not taking care of yourself to the degree of 309 00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:30,000 Speaker 1: stress you have to deal with. You'll be surprised as 310 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:33,560 Speaker 1: to how much stress the human mind can take on 311 00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:38,040 Speaker 1: when you feel prepared and when you feel connected, as 312 00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:40,200 Speaker 1: opposed to when you just keep taking more and more 313 00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:43,960 Speaker 1: stress on but you're not really truly aware. So I 314 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:48,000 Speaker 1: want you to start treating yourself like an athlete and 315 00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:51,240 Speaker 1: training yourself like an athlete when it comes to thinking 316 00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:55,720 Speaker 1: about what is really affecting your mental health. The third 317 00:17:56,520 --> 00:18:00,400 Speaker 1: is become an ambassador for mental health in the world place. 318 00:18:01,119 --> 00:18:06,160 Speaker 1: The workplace needs more mental health ambassadors. The workplace needs 319 00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:12,080 Speaker 1: individuals like you to advocate for others. And I recently 320 00:18:12,119 --> 00:18:16,639 Speaker 1: have been doing so many internal keynotes and events with 321 00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:21,040 Speaker 1: corporations where one of you has seen one of my videos, 322 00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,840 Speaker 1: one of you has heard one of my podcasts, one 323 00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:25,480 Speaker 1: of you has seen one of my interviews on the 324 00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:28,359 Speaker 1: Today Show or wherever it is, and you've said to 325 00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,720 Speaker 1: your company that we need to focus on our mental health. 326 00:18:31,119 --> 00:18:33,720 Speaker 1: Sometimes I've even come into your organizations to give the 327 00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:37,800 Speaker 1: keynote and presentation because of that. And that's what I've 328 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:42,760 Speaker 1: found so fascinating that it is people like you inside 329 00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:44,960 Speaker 1: a company that can advocate for mental health. When I 330 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,520 Speaker 1: worked at Accenture, I was one of those people, and 331 00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:53,919 Speaker 1: I started meditation mondays. I started afternoon evening lunch meditation sessions. 332 00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,080 Speaker 1: It was my way of trying to help my friends 333 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:59,040 Speaker 1: and advocate and has support them and to be able 334 00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:01,480 Speaker 1: to share what I knew about the space. We would 335 00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:05,240 Speaker 1: even invite experts and psychologists and teachers into the space. 336 00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:08,840 Speaker 1: So I want you to really consider that, how can 337 00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:11,840 Speaker 1: you become a mental health ambassador at work? How can 338 00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:13,879 Speaker 1: you take on the mantle. You may be feeling like 339 00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:15,840 Speaker 1: your company doesn't care, you may be feeling like the 340 00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:18,119 Speaker 1: people around you don't care. How can you show that 341 00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:21,560 Speaker 1: you care? How can you take that step and make 342 00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:25,080 Speaker 1: a difference in the workplace based on the experience that 343 00:19:25,119 --> 00:19:28,440 Speaker 1: you've been having. One of the reasons why we feel 344 00:19:28,480 --> 00:19:31,280 Speaker 1: a lot of mental health challenges at work is because 345 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:35,520 Speaker 1: we compare ourselves to others. But just as on Instagram 346 00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:39,159 Speaker 1: you compare yourself to people's highlight reels, at work, you're 347 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:42,679 Speaker 1: just comparing yourself to how someone appears. You're comparing yourself 348 00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,960 Speaker 1: to how they look. You're comparing yourself to the suit 349 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:47,960 Speaker 1: they wear, You're comparing yourself to their performance. You have 350 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:52,320 Speaker 1: no idea what's happening in their personal life. And the 351 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:54,560 Speaker 1: truth is, when something does happen in their personal life, 352 00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:56,199 Speaker 1: you go, oh, yeah, they always work too hard, and 353 00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:59,879 Speaker 1: look what happened in their personal life. But that's not 354 00:20:00,119 --> 00:20:01,600 Speaker 1: what we need to do. We don't need to criticize, 355 00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:03,040 Speaker 1: we don't need to compare. We need to check in 356 00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:06,879 Speaker 1: with ourselves and say, what is my capacity? What capacity 357 00:20:06,920 --> 00:20:09,640 Speaker 1: do I want to have, what results do I want 358 00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:13,399 Speaker 1: to have, and what capacity does that demand? Right, Like, 359 00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:15,080 Speaker 1: I know that there have been times in my life 360 00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:19,119 Speaker 1: where i have burned the candle at both ends, but 361 00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:22,000 Speaker 1: I've done it consciously. I've known that I'm going after 362 00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:24,200 Speaker 1: a certain goal and result and I'm ready to do it. 363 00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:26,480 Speaker 1: And there have been times in my life where I've 364 00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:30,800 Speaker 1: totally stepped back and taken a break and just accepted 365 00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:34,120 Speaker 1: that that isn't the place I want to work at. 366 00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:38,440 Speaker 1: And so the fourth step is take the time off 367 00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:43,240 Speaker 1: if you need it. Don't be afraid to take time off. 368 00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:47,680 Speaker 1: I think so many people are scared of doing that, 369 00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:53,000 Speaker 1: but actually sometimes that's the only answer. It's totally okay, 370 00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:56,040 Speaker 1: it's totally valid, and it gives you the time and 371 00:20:56,280 --> 00:21:00,080 Speaker 1: space to figure out whether it's the job, whether it's you, 372 00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:04,480 Speaker 1: whether you can handle it or not. And that space 373 00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:07,200 Speaker 1: can actually give you the distance you need to make 374 00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:12,280 Speaker 1: a healthier decision. Right, the distance can help you make 375 00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:16,960 Speaker 1: a healthier decision. You don't have to quit now. The 376 00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:22,520 Speaker 1: fifth step is being careful about how much you take 377 00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:25,520 Speaker 1: on and the way you do. This is when you 378 00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,439 Speaker 1: ask to take something new on. Speak to your manager 379 00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:30,399 Speaker 1: and say, hey, this is what I'm working on right now. 380 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:33,439 Speaker 1: Where does this sit in the priority list? And they 381 00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:35,000 Speaker 1: may even say, oh, I didn't realize you had so 382 00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,200 Speaker 1: much on Okay, I'll find someone else to that, or 383 00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:39,600 Speaker 1: they may say, oh, it's number three, don't worry about it. 384 00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:45,159 Speaker 1: The mistake you make when you accept responsibility without priority 385 00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:50,720 Speaker 1: is that you set yourself up for misery right. Never 386 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:56,480 Speaker 1: take on responsibility without knowing its priority and making someone 387 00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:59,280 Speaker 1: aware of all your other responsibilities. By the way, this 388 00:21:59,359 --> 00:22:03,840 Speaker 1: even applies at home. This even applies with your partner, 389 00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:07,040 Speaker 1: making them aware and being aware. And sometimes you're not 390 00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:09,680 Speaker 1: even aware of how many things you do. Literally, take 391 00:22:09,720 --> 00:22:11,800 Speaker 1: a moment to write down everything you do professionally and 392 00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:14,960 Speaker 1: everything you do personally right now, and when you next 393 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:17,520 Speaker 1: speak to someone, you don't have to read it with bitterness. 394 00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:18,680 Speaker 1: You have to share. By the way, I just want 395 00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:20,120 Speaker 1: you to know I'm doing all of this stuff. I'm 396 00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:22,720 Speaker 1: not sure I can do more right or when you're 397 00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:24,080 Speaker 1: asked to do more, say I'm doing all of this. 398 00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:29,119 Speaker 1: Where does this one fit in? It's so important? And 399 00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:31,119 Speaker 1: the sixth and final step I want to encourage all 400 00:22:31,119 --> 00:22:34,639 Speaker 1: of you to do is make sure that you speak 401 00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:39,800 Speaker 1: to someone. Make sure that you take that opportunity to 402 00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:43,359 Speaker 1: connect with someone. I think so often we suffer alone. 403 00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:49,760 Speaker 1: We think telling someone about how we feel makes us weak. 404 00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:53,959 Speaker 1: So much of this is related to how we think 405 00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:58,880 Speaker 1: we're going to look. Isn't that just fascinating? So much 406 00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:02,320 Speaker 1: of this it's related to how we think we're going 407 00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:06,199 Speaker 1: to look. But guess what, when you're struggling and you 408 00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:10,080 Speaker 1: won't even be able to look at yourself properly, you 409 00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:14,000 Speaker 1: won't be able to deal with that properly. And so 410 00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:19,399 Speaker 1: I want you to be really, really aware that you 411 00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:24,679 Speaker 1: can't just let people's opinions and how you think people 412 00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:29,120 Speaker 1: will feel about you affect how you feel about yourself. 413 00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:34,360 Speaker 1: Your feelings about yourself, your relationship with about yourself are 414 00:23:34,359 --> 00:23:40,720 Speaker 1: the most important things that you could potentially think about, 415 00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:45,760 Speaker 1: And for so many of us, we completely let our 416 00:23:45,920 --> 00:23:50,000 Speaker 1: whole life be governed by how we think people will 417 00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:52,879 Speaker 1: think about what we choose to do. If your team 418 00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:57,080 Speaker 1: thinks you're weak, it doesn't make you weaker. And we 419 00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:59,920 Speaker 1: also have to learn to find the support to destigma 420 00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:03,120 Speaker 1: ties mental health. We have to think about mental health 421 00:24:03,119 --> 00:24:05,840 Speaker 1: how we do physical health. So I hope this has 422 00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:08,600 Speaker 1: giving you some insights and some advice and some things 423 00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,439 Speaker 1: to think about. Overall, I always recommend checking with a 424 00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:14,720 Speaker 1: doctor and a psychiatrist. I'm not giving medical advice that 425 00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:17,679 Speaker 1: I'm giving advice and helping you become aware of some 426 00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,479 Speaker 1: of the big challenges. I've got your back, I'm on 427 00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:22,719 Speaker 1: your side, and i can't wait to see how your 428 00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:25,760 Speaker 1: life changes when you implement some of these ideas. Thank 429 00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:27,920 Speaker 1: you so much, sending you so much love.