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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam.

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Speaker 2: This is John the og story Time podcast host.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and we got some great stories coming up.

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Speaker 4: But before that, we get a teeny two minute break

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Speaker 4: from the sponsors that keep the show propped up like

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Speaker 4: a little house.

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Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I plan to stop financially supporting my son

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Speaker 5: because he changed.

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Speaker 6: No more money for you, boy.

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Speaker 5: I thirty eight male, have a total of six children.

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Speaker 5: To keep this short, I'm talking about my son thirteen mail.

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Speaker 5: My son doesn't live with me anymore after he got

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Speaker 5: into some trouble and it was decided that it was

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Speaker 5: best if he moved in with my ex wife. He

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Speaker 5: and his older sister eighteen female lived with her. By

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Speaker 5: the way, this comes from user ordinary Trash fifty nine

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Speaker 5: to twenty eight and if you want to meet your

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Speaker 5: own stories, go to the r slash Okay story Time

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Speaker 5: subbured it. I'm key On, I'm Angie, and we're here

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Speaker 5: to give good advice. Goofly, But we don't have all

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Speaker 5: the answers. We only know what we'd do, so please

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Speaker 5: let us know what you do in the comments. So

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Speaker 5: my children and I lived together for about sevenish years

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Speaker 5: after their mother and I split. The move to their

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Speaker 5: mother was within the last two years. Recently, I've noticed

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Speaker 5: that my son isn't returning to my phone calls or

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Speaker 5: text messages. I'm only asking this now because I'm afraid

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Speaker 5: that he will look at reaching out come Christmas time

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Speaker 5: with a list. Recently, my son has been in.

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Speaker 3: Some trouble in school, and while his mother and.

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Speaker 5: I are not adverse serial, we aren't always in sync

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Speaker 5: in regard to discipline, but she keeps me apprized of

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Speaker 5: his behaviors and whatnot. There were two recent incidents where I,

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Speaker 5: as his father, needed to intervene. One was an incident

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Speaker 5: that could have landed him in jail, and his mother

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Speaker 5: and I had a long talk with him where we

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Speaker 5: let him know that if he does end up in jail,

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Speaker 5: that he will stay there until I get there. I'm

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Speaker 5: nine hours away. For context, he made it clear to

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Speaker 5: me that he doesn't want to move back in with

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Speaker 5: me because my house is full of his other siblings.

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Speaker 3: They all get along.

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Speaker 5: He just likes his space and there isn't a lot

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Speaker 5: of room to have quiet with a toddler and an infant,

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Speaker 5: so I'm not.

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Speaker 3: Salty about that.

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Speaker 5: But back to the issue, his mother and I told

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Speaker 5: him if he didn't get his act together that he

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Speaker 5: would have to move back in with me.

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Speaker 3: We were in sync on this.

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Speaker 5: We were also in sync with his social media, as

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Speaker 5: he had vulgarity and his little girlfriend in high school

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Speaker 5: posted things his mother and I agreed were a major

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Speaker 5: no nos. Before he went home this past summer, I

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Speaker 5: told him I wasn't even fond of him having a girlfriend,

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Speaker 5: but he didn't live with me, so I asked him

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Speaker 5: to at the very least be respectful. So when I

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Speaker 5: saw what was posted, he got himself a tongue lashing

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Speaker 5: and was told to take the vulgarity and girlfriend off immediately. Well,

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Speaker 5: I guess that pissed him off because it's been weeks

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Speaker 5: now and he hasn't responded to call, text, video call,

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Speaker 5: or anything. I asked his mother if there was an issue,

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Speaker 5: and she said she would talk to him. His older

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Speaker 5: sister and I talk regularly, so in our most recent call,

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Speaker 5: I asked her if she could gently remind him that

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Speaker 5: I've been reaching out. When I asked her about it,

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Speaker 5: she said, he just rolled his eyes and ignored her.

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Speaker 5: This is what I feared. My son is actively avoiding me.

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Speaker 5: I'll wrap this up my daughter and I talk so

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Speaker 5: when it comes to Christmas, specifically, when she sends her list,

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Speaker 5: I'm all set for doing her list. Now, I can

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Speaker 5: say one thing I could believe it to be is

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Speaker 5: that recently I seen that he took a picture he

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Speaker 5: had with his two month step sibling off and posted

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Speaker 5: this girlfriend Again, I'm not the social media police. If

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Speaker 5: you want to take your little brother off those were

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Speaker 5: the words he used in the post, then by all meat. However,

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Speaker 5: here we are and Christmas is quickly knocking on our door.

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Speaker 5: Now for my two children that don't live at home, yes,

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Speaker 5: I support them financially. I pay child support and if

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Speaker 5: they have ever asked I could do it, then they

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Speaker 5: had whatever within the week. Not to mention, if I'm

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Speaker 5: out our online shopping and I see something one would like,

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Speaker 5: I got my way to send it to them. This

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Speaker 5: ducking me and being blatantly disrespectful has had me thinking

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Speaker 5: should I fund my disrespect? Should I keep doing extra

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Speaker 5: for a kid that disrespects me? So I have a

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Speaker 5: deadline that says if he doesn't reach out by next

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Speaker 5: week without asking for something, then Christmas for him is canceled.

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Speaker 1: Well you're gonna cancel Christmas?

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Speaker 3: Well, You can't do that.

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Speaker 6: Canceling Christmas?

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Speaker 3: People? People have jobs.

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Speaker 6: Those elves, those elves, You're gonna put all those elves

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Speaker 6: out of work?

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Speaker 3: Sannah and missus claws? What are we doing the reindeer?

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Speaker 6: Wow?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 3: Pe?

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Speaker 5: Come on, and I'll be withdrawing all financial support moving

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Speaker 5: forward minus child support?

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Speaker 3: Am I overreacting? Or does he need this lesson now?

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Speaker 5: I don't want to cut him off, but if he's

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Speaker 5: going to continue to make himself unavailable to even talk

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Speaker 5: and be blatantly disrespectful to me, why should I keep

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Speaker 5: dropping cash, apps or go out of my way for

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Speaker 5: anything other than books, underwear and socks for Christmas? I

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Speaker 5: don't know how else to get his attention. I can't

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Speaker 5: just shout to my ex wife's house.

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Speaker 3: Am I the a hole?

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Speaker 2: God?

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Speaker 3: My number one? You are the a hole? The teen

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Speaker 3: years are hard and your child is lashing out.

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Speaker 2: You.

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Speaker 5: Canceling Christmas as a punishment is not going to suddenly

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Speaker 5: make him run into your arms and say that he

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Speaker 5: loves you outside of telling him that his social media

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Speaker 5: is unacceptable. What sort of relationship and interactions do you

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Speaker 5: have with your son if they are always negative and

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Speaker 5: you're always a disciplinarian, and then of course he's going

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Speaker 5: to duck you when he knows all he's going to

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Speaker 5: get is an ear full of lecture. He's going to

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Speaker 5: roll his eyes, and he's going to be annoyed. But

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Speaker 5: maybe you two could better discuss these things in person.

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Speaker 5: When the last time you saw him and spent quality

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Speaker 5: time with him, OP responds with my son and I

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Speaker 5: used to have daily texts or heads and weekly check

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Speaker 5: ins on the phone. It was a sudden answer, abrupt departure,

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Speaker 5: or to come in the update coming number two not

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Speaker 5: necessarily the a hole. Honestly, to a large extent, his

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Speaker 5: behavior sounds like typical I'm irritated with you teenage behavior,

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Speaker 5: as long as you continue to pay child support and

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Speaker 5: save for college or whatever is in your divorce decree.

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Speaker 5: I would discuss with his mom what would be appropriate

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Speaker 5: for Christmas. His behavior should have consequences, But if he

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Speaker 5: was being a typical brady teenager at home, what would

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Speaker 5: the level of your response be. If he chooses to

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Speaker 5: ignore you, then maybe no, he shouldn't expect to receive

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Speaker 5: a gaggle of gifts or money come Christmas, but also

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Speaker 5: not nothing. I would suggest having a conversation with your

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Speaker 5: ex so that you can all be in a chord

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Speaker 5: on this issue of what's reasonable, and give him a

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Speaker 5: warning even if he only talks to you, so that

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Speaker 5: he can.

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Speaker 3: Have a nice Christmas.

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Speaker 5: The act of doing that will help you to foster

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Speaker 5: and rebuild your connection any if you don't decide to

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Speaker 5: warn him that his behavior is going to have consequences

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Speaker 5: at Christmas, you should be doing things to try and

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Speaker 5: create connection with your son.

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Speaker 3: Despite the distance.

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Speaker 5: Visit as often as possible you can, or have him

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Speaker 5: come to you. He's a teenager, so he's going to

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Speaker 5: be a brat. He's not going to want to do it.

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Speaker 5: But when you get your ex in your corner, you

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Speaker 5: all can certainly force him to dedicate a specific amount

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Speaker 5: of time on specific days to communicate with you. He

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Speaker 5: may be reluctant initially or quiet, but you just have

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Speaker 5: to keep engaging with them so that relationship doesn't get

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Speaker 5: more awkward and distant. Boys are so different, but keep

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Speaker 5: working on it. Maybe see got a therapist to help

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Speaker 5: you get tools to parent, communicate and engage more effectively.

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Speaker 5: From AFAR with your son. Good luck, there is an update.

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Speaker 3: Okay, do you have anything else.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I think those were great comments. I

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Speaker 1: think it's there's this part of me that's like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know what to do, and then.

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Speaker 6: Part of me is like, holy crap, I'm terrified of

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Speaker 6: becoming this parent, like not becoming ope, but like being

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Speaker 6: a parent through these teenage years.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I think the closest thing I've been to as a

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Speaker 5: parent is like I've been a camp counselor I've been

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Speaker 5: a babysitter, but even to that decree that, I'm like,

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Speaker 5: I'm still not even one tenth of a parent at.

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Speaker 6: Be right, Like I worked with kids, but like oldest

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Speaker 6: was like ten. Yeah, like pretty.

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Speaker 5: Much I've worked with kids, but like yeah, totally. I mean,

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Speaker 5: try to put yourself in his shoes.

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Speaker 3: Ope.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I know that's really hard, but try to put

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Speaker 5: yourself in his shoes. He's a teenager, going back and

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Speaker 5: forth changing his you know, his homes where he's staying.

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Speaker 3: I think the moving the post of his youngest sibling.

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Speaker 3: I think that's just to like act cool.

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Speaker 5: Like of my social media presence, yeah, kids, like like

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Speaker 5: I feel like when I had pictures of me as

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Speaker 5: a baby or in my room or like my family,

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Speaker 5: when I started having like girls coming over.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, no, no, no, no, don't.

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Speaker 1: I don't like that, don't like yeah, so yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: probably the thing.

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Speaker 6: It's just like, oh my younger sibling's so lame.

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Speaker 1: I can't have them. I can't get proud of my

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Speaker 1: younger tib.

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Speaker 5: All he says is goo goo gaga Peepeecca like and

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Speaker 5: we do have an update. Turns out the kid had

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Speaker 5: a legitimate beef with me for starters to the people

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Speaker 5: projecting that I chose my new family over him, quit

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Speaker 5: it and seek therapy. Mom and I talked today and

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Speaker 5: she told me there was a beef and she wasn't

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Speaker 5: getting any headway past that, but she told him he

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Speaker 5: wasn't allowed to dodge me anymore. Whatever it was, he

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Speaker 5: owed his father the decency of telling me what the

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Speaker 5: problem is. Some of you aren't going to be a

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Speaker 5: fan of it, but we are raising our kids to

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Speaker 5: face their problems and not cower from them.

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Speaker 3: So what was this beef?

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Speaker 5: Turns out he had hurt himself just a week before

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Speaker 5: the dressing down about his inappropriate activities on social media.

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Speaker 5: He was expecting the call to be ME checking on

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Speaker 5: him and asking if he was okay. He says, I

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Speaker 5: did not, so much had happened that week. It legitimately

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Speaker 5: slipped my mind. Now the injury wasn't major, and Mom

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Speaker 5: mentioned it to me in very nonchalant type of way.

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Speaker 5: The following day, she followed up and let me know

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Speaker 5: he was good, then proceeded to go into a long

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Speaker 5: convote about the inappropriate behavior on socials. I worked nights,

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Speaker 5: so I couldn't talk about it with him immediately. Took

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Speaker 5: a few days in between my talk with mom and

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Speaker 5: when I could talk to him the behavior on socials,

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Speaker 5: and it was so bad so it needed to be addressed.

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Speaker 5: So in my head when I addressed him, he was

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Speaker 5: fine physically, but he needed the stern talking to about

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Speaker 5: his social behavior.

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Speaker 3: What say you.

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Speaker 6: I think it's great that we have an answer here.

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Speaker 6: I think conversation hopefully this can like open up a

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Speaker 6: heart to heart kind of thing, because I feel like

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Speaker 6: there were a lot of things when I was younger

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Speaker 6: where it was like, oh, Mom, like you, what do you?

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Speaker 1: Why are you doing this?

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Speaker 6: And then she like tell me like it's kind of

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Speaker 6: I guess the opposite situation, but she opens up in

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Speaker 6: some sort of like hearttheart thing, and I'm like oh wow, okay,

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Speaker 6: I totally understand now, and so maybe if the opposite

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Speaker 6: happens of like, he's like, oh my gosh, I just

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Speaker 6: had no idea that you felt this hard about it.

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Speaker 6: I'm so sorry, Like I had no like bad intentions,

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Speaker 6: like I do want to be there for you.

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Speaker 1: I'm glad I know now, and please tell.

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Speaker 6: Me, you know in the future if if you want

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Speaker 6: more attention like this.

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Speaker 3: Ope, he says, you know what my son was thinking.

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Speaker 3: Dad didn't check on me when he told me that.

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Speaker 3: My heart sank.

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Speaker 5: Y'all, my son has been in his fields because I

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Speaker 5: didn't check on him. My wife and I talked it over,

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Speaker 5: and I remember saying it to her. My ex told

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Speaker 5: me he is good. I wronged my son and I

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Speaker 5: had to apologize. He agreed that he missed our chats

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Speaker 5: and weekly check ins. We proceeded to have a long,

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Speaker 5: in depth conversation about his previous behavior and why it

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Speaker 5: is inappropriate to post another child on social media, even

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Speaker 5: if it is his girlfriend.

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Speaker 3: I asked him if he'd.

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Speaker 5: Like it if those things were said about his sisters,

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Speaker 5: and I asked him if he would like her father

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Speaker 5: seeing that said about his little girl. He understood what

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Speaker 5: I meant, and she's why his mother and I feel

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Speaker 5: it's inappropriate. Is all, well, probably not yet, But what

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Speaker 5: I know is I'd definitely be the a hole if

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Speaker 5: I canceled Christmas. Thanks for the feedback, y'all, Christmas is saved.

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Speaker 5: Never to any kid, Never cancel Christmas.

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Speaker 1: Don't cancel Christmas.

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Speaker 5: That shouldn't even be like a plan on it. Yeah,

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Speaker 5: like no, never cancel Christmas.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, And that's the end of this story.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna go on to the next one.

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Speaker 6: I cut off my cousin because she made a scene

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Speaker 6: at my sister's wedding.

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Speaker 3: This ain't a scene, it's an arms race.

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Speaker 6: I twenty female, cut my relationship with my cousin twenty

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Speaker 6: six female.

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Speaker 1: We will call her Jane. Cut her off.

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Speaker 6: By the way, this comes from a glittering lie. Twenty

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Speaker 6: seven to sixty three. And if you want to submit

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Speaker 6: your own stories, go to the r slash Okay, storytime

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Speaker 6: and separated it.

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Speaker 1: And I'm Angie, I'm Keon, and we're here to give

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Speaker 1: good advice. Goofully.

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Speaker 6: But we don't have all the answers. We just know

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Speaker 6: we would do in the situation. So let us know

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Speaker 6: what you would do in the comments. So Jane had

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Speaker 6: a rocky childhood and her dad, my uncle, is a wiener.

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Speaker 6: I see some of him in her personality wise. A

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Speaker 6: main part of her personality is she demands respect when

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Speaker 6: she hasn't earned it.

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Speaker 1: It is my.

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Speaker 6: Personal belief that the only people that get respect out

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Speaker 6: the gate are parents if they've been good to you, grandparents,

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Speaker 6: and maybe siblings. Anyone outside of that earns your respect.

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Speaker 6: In my family, the only two people that haven't earned

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Speaker 6: my respect are Jane and her dad, purely through their actions.

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Speaker 6: Her personality is very similar to my mom's. They are

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Speaker 6: very blunt, negative and you can see every emotion on

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Speaker 6: their face.

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Speaker 1: The difference is my mom has tact and class.

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Speaker 6: It took me and Mom a really long time to

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Speaker 6: have the good relationship that we have now because our

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Speaker 6: personality is clashed, but both of us wanted it, and

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Speaker 6: both sides put in effort. For context, Here are a

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Speaker 6: few fights that we've had in the past. For most

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Speaker 6: of these, I was a miner. Jane always assumes that

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Speaker 6: I'm being crappy, whether that is how she reads my

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Speaker 6: text messages or just reacts to very normal things that

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Speaker 6: I say. One example was when I was about seventeen,

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Speaker 6: and she asked me to make a cake for her husband.

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Speaker 6: I make cakes on the side, so this wasn't a

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Speaker 6: weird request, but it was around Christmas time and I

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Speaker 6: already had three cake orders. She gave me about two

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Speaker 6: weeks notice, which would have been fine if I didn't

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Speaker 6: already have those orders. So I politely told her, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 6: I wish I could, but I don't have the time.

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Speaker 6: I have three cake orders and they're all due. Around

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Speaker 6: the same time, I was next to my other cousin,

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Speaker 6: will name her Sarah. Sarah was middle school age at

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Speaker 6: this point, but homeschooled, so she didn't realize that when

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Speaker 6: you change certain words it makes a big difference. I

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Speaker 6: said something along the lines of it worked out because

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Speaker 6: I wouldn't have charged them that much because they're family.

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Speaker 6: Sarah heard this, internalized it, and told Jane that I

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Speaker 6: said they wouldn't pay me enough, which is not what

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Speaker 6: I said. That made Jane angry. Luckily, she texted my

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Speaker 6: sister before she angry texted me and realized it was

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Speaker 6: a big misunderstanding.

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Speaker 1: But I have confirmation from.

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Speaker 6: The future that she doesn't believe it was a misunderstanding.

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Speaker 6: When I was a miner, I didn't stand up to

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Speaker 6: her because I didn't believe it was my place. I said,

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Speaker 6: she's older than me and should just move on.

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Speaker 1: Let it go.

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Speaker 6: We're not close.

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Speaker 1: But then she became really close to my sister. We'll

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Speaker 1: call her Victoria.

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Speaker 6: Victoria and Jane are not related because of blended family

337
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Speaker 6: stuff on my side, so they didn't grow up together.

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Speaker 6: The biggest fight we had was planning Victoria's bridal shower.

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Speaker 6: Victoria already had two bridal showers because of said blended family,

340
00:13:16,600 --> 00:13:18,800
Speaker 6: but we were bridesmaids and it was our duty to

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Speaker 6: put something together. Victoria's maid of honor is her childhood

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Speaker 6: best friend that lives on the other side of the country,

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Speaker 6: so Jane named herself the matron of honor because she's married.

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Speaker 6: She did do a lot to help with the wedding,

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Speaker 6: but Victoria didn't want both a maid of honor and

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Speaker 6: a matron of honor. Before this fight, Victoria had just

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Speaker 6: had her bachelorette trip in Newport Beach, California.

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Speaker 1: This was Jane's first time meeting the maid of honor.

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Speaker 1: To say she.

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Speaker 6: Hated her was an understatement. I have to believe there

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Speaker 6: is some jealousy there too. On the trip, she's yelling

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Speaker 6: I'm the maid of honor, and Victoria is just rolling

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Speaker 6: her eyes. We were planning her bridal shower. It's me,

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Speaker 6: Jane and my older sister Sissy. Before the meeting, Jane

355
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Speaker 6: had texted us what the groom's parents had done for

356
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Speaker 6: their party and was like, this is what we have

357
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:03,319
Speaker 6: to beat. As a joke, I was like, whoa, those

358
00:14:03,360 --> 00:14:06,320
Speaker 6: are rich doctors. We're broke adults. Our Is it going

359
00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:08,480
Speaker 6: to be great? Or is something along the lines of that.

360
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:11,920
Speaker 6: She internalized that as me being crappy and went into

361
00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:14,040
Speaker 6: the meeting thinking that I'm going to be crappy. She

362
00:14:14,160 --> 00:14:17,080
Speaker 6: walks in, I'm being nice, polite and cordial. I'm writing

363
00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:18,839
Speaker 6: down the stuff that we're planning. And then we get

364
00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:21,240
Speaker 6: to the games, which she had approved in August, and

365
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:24,160
Speaker 6: this was the beginning of October. I explained that it's

366
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Speaker 6: two games and then something heartfelt. It was write a

367
00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:31,800
Speaker 6: memory about Victoria bride a unscramble, and then how well

368
00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:33,640
Speaker 6: do you know the bride and groom? She was like,

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Speaker 6: I don't think anyone is going to know those questions.

370
00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:40,040
Speaker 6: I was like, they're really easy questions and like what's

371
00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:40,960
Speaker 6: their middle name?

372
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Speaker 1: And where did they meet?

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Speaker 6: So she starts to get irritated, and at this point

374
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Speaker 6: I didn't realize why, so I said one of those

375
00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:49,240
Speaker 6: jokes that don't land and was like, well, if you

376
00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:50,840
Speaker 6: don't know the bride and groom by now that's a

377
00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:54,160
Speaker 6: little concerning ha haha. Then she's all like, why are

378
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:56,880
Speaker 6: you getting so defensive about this. I'm like, I'm not

379
00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:59,280
Speaker 6: trying to be defensive. It's just that I showed you

380
00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:01,480
Speaker 6: these and you prop them two months ago, so I'm

381
00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:02,600
Speaker 6: not sure what your problem is.

382
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:02,800
Speaker 3: Now.

383
00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:05,480
Speaker 6: We keep going planning, and then Jane wants to talk

384
00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:08,120
Speaker 6: to Sissy about the bachelorette trip. Jane looks at me

385
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,800
Speaker 6: and says really crappy and says this is better not

386
00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:13,120
Speaker 6: leave the room.

387
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,680
Speaker 1: I was like shocked, like okay.

388
00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:18,400
Speaker 6: Then she says never mind, I don't want this getting

389
00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:20,840
Speaker 6: back to Victoria. So I go on my phone because

390
00:15:20,880 --> 00:15:23,640
Speaker 6: they're talking and we're not planning right now. She looks

391
00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:25,520
Speaker 6: at me and goes, can you get off your phone?

392
00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,800
Speaker 6: We're planning. At this point, we're both irritated. I am

393
00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:31,280
Speaker 6: no longer a minor and therefore not afraid to stand

394
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Speaker 6: up for myself.

395
00:15:32,040 --> 00:15:34,760
Speaker 3: Go you op, stand up for yourself. Op.

396
00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:38,280
Speaker 6: It took adulthood. I go, we're not planning right now,

397
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:41,480
Speaker 6: you're talking tea. Sissy sees that we're about to fight

398
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:44,480
Speaker 6: and tries to mediate, and she goes, I don't even

399
00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:46,680
Speaker 6: know what the tea is about. The only context clues

400
00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:48,200
Speaker 6: I have is that she doesn't want us to get

401
00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:51,640
Speaker 6: back to Victoria. At this Jane blows up and starts

402
00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:54,800
Speaker 6: yelling at me that it is not about Victoria and

403
00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:58,000
Speaker 6: she would never talk crap about Victoria, and how dare.

404
00:15:57,840 --> 00:15:58,440
Speaker 1: I say that?

405
00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:01,880
Speaker 6: At this point, I'm just more confused than anything. And

406
00:16:02,120 --> 00:16:05,000
Speaker 6: when I'm upset, my response is to not cry because

407
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,600
Speaker 6: that shows weakness. Instead, I internalize it into anger. I

408
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:11,440
Speaker 6: don't even remember what I said, but I was being ugly.

409
00:16:11,760 --> 00:16:14,560
Speaker 6: I can admit when I make mistakes, and so I

410
00:16:14,720 --> 00:16:17,080
Speaker 6: was horrible, but a lot of it stemmed from her

411
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:19,840
Speaker 6: insulting me in her anger, and I was trying not

412
00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:20,560
Speaker 6: to cry.

413
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:21,640
Speaker 4: So I got really nasty.

414
00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:24,320
Speaker 6: One of my favorite lines from that day, Jane said,

415
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,440
Speaker 6: if you keep disrespecting me, I'm not gonna let you

416
00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:28,360
Speaker 6: in my house, and you won't be invited to your

417
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:31,400
Speaker 6: own sister's bridle shower, I said, threaten me with a

418
00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:33,600
Speaker 6: good time, I don't have to spend time with you.

419
00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:34,840
Speaker 6: Sounds wonderful.

420
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:37,160
Speaker 1: That is something that she repeated a lot, that I

421
00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,560
Speaker 1: better show respect or I won't be allowed in her home.

422
00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:40,480
Speaker 1: She leaves.

423
00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:42,480
Speaker 6: I take time to think about it and realize I

424
00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:44,600
Speaker 6: need to put my feelings aside so that this wedding

425
00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:48,080
Speaker 6: goes smoothly for Victoria. So against everything in me, I

426
00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:50,960
Speaker 6: send Jane a nice apology. I ask if we can

427
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:53,680
Speaker 6: turn over a new leaf. We both said hurtful things.

428
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:56,800
Speaker 6: Let's move on. Mind you, never once in any of

429
00:16:56,840 --> 00:17:00,160
Speaker 6: our countless arguments did she ever apologize. My mommy even

430
00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:03,320
Speaker 6: says this. Jane is never wrong. The wedding shower goes great.

431
00:17:03,760 --> 00:17:05,919
Speaker 6: I bite my tongue a lot. Moving on to the

432
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:08,639
Speaker 6: day of the wedding, all the bridesmaids minus Sissy are

433
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:12,000
Speaker 6: getting ready at Victoria's mom's airbnb. Victoria has hired a

434
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,880
Speaker 6: makeup artist, and Jane decided she wanted to partake. I'm

435
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,879
Speaker 6: in the corner doing my own hair and makeup, so

436
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,680
Speaker 6: I witnessed this whole interaction. The only person that had

437
00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:22,720
Speaker 6: a trial with this makeup artist is Victoria because she's

438
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:25,639
Speaker 6: the bride, So this makeup artist has never met Jane before.

439
00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:28,120
Speaker 6: Jane shows her an insmo pick and the makeup artist

440
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,919
Speaker 6: asks if she has another one. Jane says something like

441
00:17:31,160 --> 00:17:34,040
Speaker 6: I can look it up. I just looked up natural makeup.

442
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:37,200
Speaker 6: Then Jane asked if she has any foundation that isn't

443
00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:39,960
Speaker 6: going to break her out. The makeup artist is like, no,

444
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:42,800
Speaker 6: it's too expensitive to carry that hypoallergetic because lots of

445
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:45,719
Speaker 6: people are allergic to different things. She then asks if

446
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:48,280
Speaker 6: there is a specific ingredient that Jane is allergic to

447
00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:50,520
Speaker 6: and she can avoid it, and Jane goes, no, I

448
00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:53,840
Speaker 6: don't know the specific ingredient, just the poor clogging foundations.

449
00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:56,800
Speaker 6: The makeup artist tries again, do you know what brands

450
00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:58,200
Speaker 6: are used when you broke out?

451
00:17:58,480 --> 00:17:59,719
Speaker 1: Jane was like, I don't know.

452
00:18:00,119 --> 00:18:02,480
Speaker 6: And then they get to the mascara and the makeup

453
00:18:02,560 --> 00:18:05,200
Speaker 6: artist at this point is matching her energy. She says,

454
00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:07,600
Speaker 6: I'm gonna put waterproof mascara so that if you cry

455
00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:10,080
Speaker 6: at the wedding, it won't run. Jane asks her not

456
00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:12,800
Speaker 6: to do the waterproof mascara because when she takes it off,

457
00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:15,439
Speaker 6: it takes her eyelashes off, which is valid. There are

458
00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:17,000
Speaker 6: different things that you can use for that.

459
00:18:17,240 --> 00:18:22,240
Speaker 5: Just say, I have no input on this. You thankfully

460
00:18:22,440 --> 00:18:24,480
Speaker 5: you are here. I got nothing.

461
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:27,199
Speaker 6: There are some like if you use a makeup wipe,

462
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:30,240
Speaker 6: just a quick thing about waterproof masca. If you use

463
00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:32,040
Speaker 6: a makeup wife and you kind of like roll it

464
00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:33,879
Speaker 6: onto you and then pull, that's gonna take.

465
00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:34,640
Speaker 1: Your eyelashes out.

466
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,760
Speaker 6: But honestly, if you use there's like a makeup like

467
00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:41,960
Speaker 6: bomb those work, or honestly just like vacilline that I

468
00:18:42,040 --> 00:18:44,840
Speaker 6: found because it's oily, it'll take all the waterproof stuff

469
00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:45,280
Speaker 6: right off.

470
00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:47,440
Speaker 3: As someone who does you do makeup a lot.

471
00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:49,960
Speaker 5: If some if you were trying to, you know, help

472
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:52,879
Speaker 5: someone out and they were just giving you like nothing.

473
00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:54,399
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just how you liked it.

474
00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:56,960
Speaker 5: I don't even act back, like at this point you're like,

475
00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:58,639
Speaker 5: I can't do your makeup and I don't want to.

476
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:01,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, right, I feel like you really like.

477
00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:03,800
Speaker 5: The furthest I don't know, he is like guyliner and

478
00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:05,760
Speaker 5: maybe like a little bit like a mass scare just

479
00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:06,800
Speaker 5: because I'm pretty.

480
00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:09,600
Speaker 6: But then the makeup artist gives her some sass back,

481
00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:11,960
Speaker 6: and it's like what cleanser. Are you using that takes

482
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:14,600
Speaker 6: off your eyelashes? Then I have to leave because I

483
00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:16,720
Speaker 6: have to deliver the wedding cake to the reception venue.

484
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:19,240
Speaker 6: Yes I did the wedding cake. Yes it was beautiful,

485
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:21,679
Speaker 6: and yes it was delicious. Then I had to my

486
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:23,640
Speaker 6: mom's house to put on my dress, and that's when

487
00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:25,800
Speaker 6: Limo picked us up. We get to the church to

488
00:19:25,960 --> 00:19:29,000
Speaker 6: take pictures, and Jane will not stop complaining and making

489
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,719
Speaker 6: a fuss in front of Vic. One of your jobs

490
00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:34,960
Speaker 6: as the bridesmaid is forget about yourself and make sure

491
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:37,560
Speaker 6: the bride has a good day. Because Vic is the

492
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:41,080
Speaker 6: biggest people pleaser with the biggest heart, and she will

493
00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:43,640
Speaker 6: internalize all of it. One of the things that Jane

494
00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:45,840
Speaker 6: said in front of Vic is that it was a

495
00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:48,400
Speaker 6: lot of work to be a bridesmaid. Gosh, that would

496
00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:50,600
Speaker 6: make me feel so guilty if one of my bridesmaids

497
00:19:50,640 --> 00:19:53,119
Speaker 6: said that on my wedding day. Like, sorry, I didn't

498
00:19:53,119 --> 00:19:55,919
Speaker 6: mean to make it so much work, sar, Like, what

499
00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:57,680
Speaker 6: do you want me to do? We're here now, it's

500
00:19:57,720 --> 00:19:58,159
Speaker 6: my wedding.

501
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 3: Shouldn't even be that much worse.

502
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:03,199
Speaker 1: I mean, yes, you like, I can understand that, but

503
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:04,760
Speaker 1: it's like, maybe tell me you're sooner.

504
00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:08,280
Speaker 6: It's now the time. Ceremony goes great. We head to

505
00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:10,720
Speaker 6: the reception. I'm at the kid's table, which is fine

506
00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:12,760
Speaker 6: because I like the kids. The people I will reference

507
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:16,639
Speaker 6: are Matthew eighteen year old boy, Tim twenty boy, Lisa

508
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:19,840
Speaker 6: twenty year old girl, and Grace fourteen year old girl,

509
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:23,680
Speaker 6: as well as Sarah from earlier and she sixteen. Matthew, Tim,

510
00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:27,080
Speaker 6: Grace and Sarah are my cousins, and Lisa is Tim's

511
00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,679
Speaker 6: girlfriend and I'm close with her. The venue start serving

512
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:32,240
Speaker 6: me wine and don't ask for my ID, so they

513
00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:35,199
Speaker 6: gave me about four glasses of chardonay, so keep that

514
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:37,840
Speaker 6: in mind. At the kid's table, we are talking about

515
00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:40,439
Speaker 6: anything and everything. At one point, I'm telling Sarah and

516
00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:43,840
Speaker 6: Grace to not drink. Then, don't smoke the devil's lettuce,

517
00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:46,240
Speaker 6: don't bape, you know, being a girl's girl and watching

518
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:47,200
Speaker 6: out for my younger cousin.

519
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:49,919
Speaker 1: Don't be me, don't be learn from me.

520
00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:52,760
Speaker 6: Then I come up with an after party for those

521
00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:55,119
Speaker 6: who are old enough but can't go to bars. This

522
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:57,840
Speaker 6: was supposed to be for Tim, Lisa and me and Matthew,

523
00:20:57,920 --> 00:21:00,399
Speaker 6: but we got his parents' permission, and they let him

524
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:02,399
Speaker 6: drink all the time. Sarah would be there, but I

525
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:05,159
Speaker 6: wouldn't let her drink. As we're talking about it, and

526
00:21:05,359 --> 00:21:08,479
Speaker 6: after we've gotten permission, we start talking about dancing and

527
00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:11,480
Speaker 6: Grace goes, I love dancing, so I go, huh, I'm

528
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:13,359
Speaker 6: sorry about I don't think you should go, and she's

529
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:16,119
Speaker 6: like why, and I'm like, I don't think you should

530
00:21:16,119 --> 00:21:18,399
Speaker 6: be around boots. My family loves booze, so I know

531
00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:20,720
Speaker 6: that if she went, she would be sneaking, and we

532
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:23,359
Speaker 6: all did at some point. So Grace asks her dad

533
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:26,400
Speaker 6: and he says she can come out, but she has

534
00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:28,600
Speaker 6: to ask her mom, and her mom said no, and

535
00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:31,480
Speaker 6: then her dad said no. Obviously, she was upset. I

536
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:33,800
Speaker 6: would be too if everyone got to go somewhere and

537
00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:36,360
Speaker 6: I couldn't go. So she was crying in the bathroom

538
00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:38,959
Speaker 6: with Sarah and Jane there to comfort her, but they

539
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,880
Speaker 6: didn't realize that Sissy was there in the stall, so

540
00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:45,560
Speaker 6: she heard everything. Grace is crying and saying like, kay

541
00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:49,320
Speaker 6: Me was right, I'm not allowed to go. Then Jane

542
00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:52,320
Speaker 6: pops up and starts talking about how I'm a witch.

543
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:55,080
Speaker 6: Then you know, teenage girl kicks in and Grace starts

544
00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:58,240
Speaker 6: saying that I was bullying her all night and all

545
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:02,040
Speaker 6: this Jane, how I pick on Sarah and then I

546
00:22:02,119 --> 00:22:05,080
Speaker 6: talk about her teeth, all of which didn't happen, and

547
00:22:05,119 --> 00:22:08,320
Speaker 6: I haven't talked about Sarah's teeth in five years when

548
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:11,520
Speaker 6: I myself was a hormonal team. Then they go back

549
00:22:11,560 --> 00:22:13,679
Speaker 6: into the reception and tell my aunt and uncle that

550
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:16,640
Speaker 6: I'm a witch and I was bullying them all night.

551
00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:20,960
Speaker 6: I am blissfully unaware of this happening. I'm eating my

552
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:24,040
Speaker 6: wonderful steak, I make my wonderful toast, and the night

553
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:26,679
Speaker 6: ends and I find out everyone thinks I'm a witch.

554
00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:28,720
Speaker 1: All the adults are heading to the after.

555
00:22:28,520 --> 00:22:30,600
Speaker 6: Party with the bride and groom, and I'm heading to

556
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:32,199
Speaker 6: Tim's house for our after party.

557
00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:34,840
Speaker 1: I'm just getting more and more upset that everyone.

558
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:37,760
Speaker 6: Is believing these lies and everyone thinks I'm a witch.

559
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:40,639
Speaker 6: And I turned over a new leaf with Jane just

560
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:43,520
Speaker 6: for her to betray me. So I'm at my house

561
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:45,520
Speaker 6: changing and I decide I need to let some of

562
00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:47,680
Speaker 6: this out before I drive the thirty minute drive in

563
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:50,160
Speaker 6: the dark. When I'm still feeling this one, I can

564
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:52,600
Speaker 6: admit it's never a good idea to text when you're angry.

565
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:54,800
Speaker 6: So I regret texting at that time.

566
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,480
Speaker 3: But I think drinking aunt driving.

567
00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:58,399
Speaker 1: Well, maybe we're not driving.

568
00:22:58,440 --> 00:23:03,160
Speaker 6: I think we're before driving. We're texting, but we're still

569
00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:06,680
Speaker 6: under the influence. While we're texting, I texted her, don't

570
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:09,199
Speaker 6: spread lies about me, and if you do, don't make

571
00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:12,439
Speaker 6: it so I find out olive branch broken. Jane asks

572
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:14,879
Speaker 6: what lies I was talking about and said all she

573
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:17,880
Speaker 6: knew was that I had Grace crying in the bathroom

574
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:20,760
Speaker 6: with her. I said that Grace wasn't really crying about me.

575
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:23,240
Speaker 6: She was crying because her mom said no. And I

576
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:25,879
Speaker 6: said she probably isn't because we're going to be drinking.

577
00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:28,480
Speaker 6: I said, if not wanting a fourteen year old to

578
00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:30,840
Speaker 6: be surrounded by booze makes me a witch, then I

579
00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:34,680
Speaker 6: guess I'm an effing witch. Jane asked what lies and said,

580
00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:37,840
Speaker 6: because she spread no lies about me, I brought up

581
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:39,520
Speaker 6: that whole thing about Sarah's teeth.

582
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:43,240
Speaker 1: Jane said, oh, that happened. I said, I haven't talked.

583
00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:45,400
Speaker 6: About Sarah's teeth in years, and that was back when

584
00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:48,439
Speaker 6: Sarah accepted it. Jane said the story was when I

585
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,040
Speaker 6: was there, so that's what she said.

586
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:52,600
Speaker 1: I said, I'm not going to argue.

587
00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:54,919
Speaker 6: Just don't expect us to be friends, because this is

588
00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:56,840
Speaker 6: just going to keep happening and I don't need this

589
00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:59,280
Speaker 6: crap in my life. Jane said she did nothing to

590
00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:01,800
Speaker 6: me and asked who told me this, and that she

591
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:05,000
Speaker 6: was talking to Grace because she was upset. I sent

592
00:24:05,080 --> 00:24:07,080
Speaker 6: her an audio message where I was mad that she

593
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,440
Speaker 6: made it a whole thing and told my aunt and uncle,

594
00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:12,520
Speaker 6: and then I said that she was a witch all

595
00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:15,119
Speaker 6: the time. I told her that I'll be cordial, but

596
00:24:15,280 --> 00:24:17,440
Speaker 6: I don't care. Then I said, have a good night,

597
00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:20,800
Speaker 6: because I'm a petty witch. I said, I heard everyone

598
00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:23,479
Speaker 6: talking about it. I said, Vic's wedding is over. We

599
00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:25,640
Speaker 6: don't need to be friends. Jane said, she never said

600
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:27,359
Speaker 6: I said something about Sarah's teeth.

601
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:29,359
Speaker 1: Now she told the story because.

602
00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:31,679
Speaker 6: Grace came to their table upset that I was picking

603
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:33,960
Speaker 6: on her, which is a habit I have. She can

604
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:36,400
Speaker 6: assure me the family doesn't think that I'm a witch

605
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:39,959
Speaker 6: because of her. I'm really proving her point by sending

606
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:42,399
Speaker 6: her a nasty message the night of my sister's wedding.

607
00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:45,000
Speaker 6: Her opinion on me is formed by my actions, which

608
00:24:45,000 --> 00:24:48,400
Speaker 6: have been quite literally a hainous. Keep going down this

609
00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:51,760
Speaker 6: road and I'll find everyone feeling this way. I said,

610
00:24:51,840 --> 00:24:54,320
Speaker 6: I'm not going to argue. I don't need her toxicity

611
00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:57,520
Speaker 6: in my life. Her opinion means jack to me. I'm

612
00:24:57,680 --> 00:25:01,639
Speaker 6: never going to bow down. And she, Jane said, luell

613
00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:05,280
Speaker 6: my toxicity. Good luck in life, you'll need it. I said,

614
00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:07,800
Speaker 6: thank you, praying hands emoji. I appreciate it.

615
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:10,679
Speaker 1: But wait, there's more to this story, or.

616
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:12,520
Speaker 3: Jane, I'm exhausted.

617
00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:14,480
Speaker 6: I am Jane so exhausted.

618
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:17,000
Speaker 1: Honestly though, I'm exhausted by both of them.

619
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:19,639
Speaker 3: Yeah, just stop replying to her?

620
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:22,640
Speaker 6: Yeah, like really, like I get it. Ope, I think

621
00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 6: you're less in the wrong. But the way that you're

622
00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:27,479
Speaker 6: responding is like no less high school.

623
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:30,480
Speaker 7: But I think he's a little crunky and a wedding

624
00:25:30,920 --> 00:25:33,200
Speaker 7: like even when she wasn't like even at the other

625
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:37,119
Speaker 7: at the other events, she's still like and it's like,

626
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:38,480
Speaker 7: come on, guys, let's fix that.

627
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:40,879
Speaker 6: So Monday I got a call from Tim and he

628
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,120
Speaker 6: never calls me. Tim works at the family business where

629
00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:45,399
Speaker 6: Jane and all my other family works. I knew I

630
00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:48,159
Speaker 6: would be the talk gossip for a while, but I

631
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:50,600
Speaker 6: didn't expect Tim to call me. He finally gets to

632
00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:53,359
Speaker 6: the point and he says, I think you overreacted the

633
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:55,800
Speaker 6: other night. I said, Tim, I love you, but I'm

634
00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:57,840
Speaker 6: not talking to you about this. I don't want you

635
00:25:57,880 --> 00:25:59,760
Speaker 6: to be in the middle of this because you shouldn't be.

636
00:26:00,080 --> 00:26:02,320
Speaker 6: I said, I own up to my mistakes and I flaws,

637
00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:04,440
Speaker 6: but I need time. I said, this was a build

638
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:06,919
Speaker 6: up of a really long time. I can see how

639
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:09,320
Speaker 6: it looks like an overreaction, but that was just me

640
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:12,320
Speaker 6: being done. Then I said, remember there are three sides

641
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:15,600
Speaker 6: to every story, and I'm not a horrible person. He said,

642
00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:16,920
Speaker 6: I know that I've known you.

643
00:26:16,880 --> 00:26:18,880
Speaker 1: Since we were kids, since we were babies.

644
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:21,240
Speaker 6: Then he said, but she's family. And I had to

645
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:24,520
Speaker 6: remind him that my relationship with Sissy is rocky because

646
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:27,399
Speaker 6: she did some fed up things and I needed space,

647
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 6: and our relationship still isn't the same. I told him

648
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,359
Speaker 6: that if my therapist says, hey, you're the a whole,

649
00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:34,840
Speaker 6: it'll still take me a while to say, hey, Jane,

650
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:37,600
Speaker 6: I was the a whole anyway. He said he understood

651
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:39,960
Speaker 6: and all that, but basically all of my mom's side

652
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:41,320
Speaker 6: of the family thinks that I'm the ahole.

653
00:26:41,359 --> 00:26:43,719
Speaker 1: My grandparents on my dad's side are on my side.

654
00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:46,480
Speaker 6: My verdict for myself is that I am the ahole

655
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,720
Speaker 6: for texting when I was angry. I don't regret what

656
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:52,440
Speaker 6: I said and I don't regret ending communications. So am

657
00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:54,359
Speaker 6: I the a hole for cutting ties with my cousin

658
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:55,919
Speaker 6: and I of my sister's wedding.

659
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:58,000
Speaker 5: I feel like the way you went about the situation,

660
00:26:58,080 --> 00:26:59,320
Speaker 5: you could have done it a little bit better by

661
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:02,520
Speaker 5: just walking away. Hey, But yeah, overall, No, even if

662
00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:05,880
Speaker 5: your mom said, Jane is never wrong even though she's.

663
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:08,920
Speaker 6: Wrong, right, Like she won't ever admit that she's wrong. Yeah,

664
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:10,600
Speaker 6: those people you really just can't argue with.

665
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 3: No, they're just draining.

666
00:27:13,640 --> 00:27:15,720
Speaker 5: Yeah, just don't put your energy into it, which is

667
00:27:15,720 --> 00:27:17,800
Speaker 5: good for youp you are moving on.

668
00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:20,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, cut off ties. You don't need to deal with her.

669
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:22,479
Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're going on

670
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:24,040
Speaker 1: to the next one.

671
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:24,480
Speaker 2: Sam.

672
00:27:24,480 --> 00:27:25,800
Speaker 3: Here, we're gonna get back to the stories.

673
00:27:25,840 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes bads from our sponsors.

674
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:32,760
Speaker 2: My roommate said, I'm ruining her relationship because her boyfriend

675
00:27:32,800 --> 00:27:33,800
Speaker 2: is scared of my dog.

676
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:35,960
Speaker 4: Maybe she needs to look in the mirror.

677
00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:40,200
Speaker 2: I twenty three female, have narcolepsy and use a service

678
00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:43,719
Speaker 2: dog who alerts me before sleep attacks. I've had her

679
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:47,440
Speaker 2: for two years and she's changed my life. My roommate

680
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:50,479
Speaker 2: nineteen female and I have lived together for six months

681
00:27:50,520 --> 00:27:53,919
Speaker 2: with no issues and we have an Editor's note. Narcolepsy

682
00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:56,600
Speaker 2: is a chronic neurological disorder that affects the brain's ability

683
00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:59,080
Speaker 2: to control sleep wake cycles. By the way, this comes

684
00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:02,159
Speaker 2: from Sealy Fox and if you want us to bet

685
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:04,600
Speaker 2: your own stories, Coude of the Arslasha Okay, storytime sub Reddit.

686
00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:07,400
Speaker 2: I'm Carly, I'm Sophia, and we're here to give good

687
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:10,080
Speaker 2: advice goofully, but we don't have all the answers. We

688
00:28:10,119 --> 00:28:11,760
Speaker 2: really know what we would do, so let us know

689
00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:13,879
Speaker 2: what you would do in the comments. Last week, she

690
00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:17,840
Speaker 2: told me her boyfriend thirty mail is moving in. I said, okay,

691
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,480
Speaker 2: but asked that we all sit down to discuss house

692
00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:23,919
Speaker 2: rules since it's a big change. During that conversation, he

693
00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:27,480
Speaker 2: said he's uncomfortable with dog, then don't move in and

694
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:31,320
Speaker 2: once her created whenever he's home. I explained she's a

695
00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:34,239
Speaker 2: service dog, not a pet, and that she needs to

696
00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 2: be with me to do her job. He said he

697
00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:40,840
Speaker 2: gets that, but his comfort matters too, since he's paying rent.

698
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:43,920
Speaker 4: You're not paying rent yet, and also op he could

699
00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:46,440
Speaker 4: should honestly say, uh, well, then I don't want you

700
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 4: to move in because you're not on lease.

701
00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:48,880
Speaker 1: I never agreed to this.

702
00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:51,520
Speaker 2: He suggested, I could keep her in my bedroom only,

703
00:28:51,640 --> 00:28:54,720
Speaker 2: but she needs to move freely to alert me wherever

704
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:57,320
Speaker 2: I am in the apartment. I said, Now, this is

705
00:28:57,320 --> 00:29:01,320
Speaker 2: a medical accommodation, not a negotiation. Now my roommate is

706
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:05,760
Speaker 2: saying I'm being inflexible and ruining her relationship because her

707
00:29:05,760 --> 00:29:10,840
Speaker 2: boyfriend is reconsidering moving in. Yes, you should, she said,

708
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:13,320
Speaker 2: I'm choosing a dog over her happiness. And then I'm

709
00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:17,120
Speaker 2: being selfish since it's her apartment too. My sister thinks

710
00:29:17,160 --> 00:29:18,640
Speaker 2: I should just try to keep the dog in my

711
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 2: room more often to meet them halfway. Oh, I told

712
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:25,240
Speaker 2: my roommate either the dog stays as is, or I'm

713
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:28,959
Speaker 2: moving out. Now she's crying that I'm abandoning her and

714
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 2: that she can't afford rent alone. Am I overreacting?

715
00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:32,840
Speaker 1: Also?

716
00:29:33,200 --> 00:29:34,360
Speaker 2: Make him pay rent?

717
00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:35,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's said he was.

718
00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:40,520
Speaker 2: We have some relevant comments. Commenter one not overreacting it

719
00:29:40,640 --> 00:29:43,840
Speaker 2: is illegal to separate you from a service animal. I

720
00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:46,120
Speaker 2: had to stand my ground against my family for the

721
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:50,000
Speaker 2: same reason. Only my dog senses my seizures before they hit.

722
00:29:50,480 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 2: Opie says, exactly, No one understands that part. My dog

723
00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 2: doesn't bother anyone. She barely even barks, and I always

724
00:29:57,840 --> 00:30:00,800
Speaker 2: look after her. There shouldn't be an issue. Two says,

725
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 2: is he on the lease. If he's not on the lease,

726
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:05,000
Speaker 2: I would not agree to him being put on the

727
00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:07,160
Speaker 2: lease or moving in. You might want to check your

728
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:10,760
Speaker 2: lease agreement and make sure there's nothing about unauthorized long

729
00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:14,440
Speaker 2: term stays from people as well. Some leasas have clauses

730
00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:16,480
Speaker 2: like this, and you'll want to make sure you aren't

731
00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:18,920
Speaker 2: breaking the lease agreement by allowing him to move in.

732
00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:21,479
Speaker 2: Opie said, I didn't want to be a rude roommate

733
00:30:21,480 --> 00:30:24,640
Speaker 2: and snitch. She's nice and we have handled everything verbally.

734
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:27,840
Speaker 2: If this continues, I will look into my lease. Thanks.

735
00:30:27,880 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 2: I didn't even think of that COMMENTRA three putting your

736
00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:35,000
Speaker 2: health and safety is non negotiable. Perhaps if he meets

737
00:30:35,080 --> 00:30:37,920
Speaker 2: the dogs and watches how the dog interacts around the

738
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:40,320
Speaker 2: space and people, he might be able to understand how

739
00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:43,080
Speaker 2: the dog will be less concerned with him and more

740
00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:46,920
Speaker 2: concerned about ensuring you're well informed about your own health.

741
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:49,840
Speaker 2: OPI responds. When we sat down and talked, he told

742
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:52,080
Speaker 2: me he was once attacked by a group of dogs

743
00:30:52,120 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 2: when he was younger. He's been going to therapy recently

744
00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:57,880
Speaker 2: to help overcome that fear and many other things, and

745
00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:01,320
Speaker 2: he even cried when he was telling me the story. Regardless,

746
00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:03,800
Speaker 2: my dog is so sweet, but I don't think letting

747
00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:07,120
Speaker 2: him around my dog is the best decision anymore. Common four,

748
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:10,160
Speaker 2: Please don't let him move in. You'll come home one

749
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:13,560
Speaker 2: day and your dog will be gone, escaped while you

750
00:31:13,600 --> 00:31:16,880
Speaker 2: were out sleeping or whatever. Opie says, That's what I'm saying.

751
00:31:16,960 --> 00:31:19,400
Speaker 2: He's already showed dissatisfaction for my dog. What if he

752
00:31:19,520 --> 00:31:23,040
Speaker 2: ends up doing something. I just don't want him there anymore.

753
00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:27,800
Speaker 2: Commoner five says stand your ground, not overreacting. If this

754
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:30,640
Speaker 2: guy doesn't move in, it's probably better for you and

755
00:31:30,680 --> 00:31:33,960
Speaker 2: your roommate. Opie says, I agree. I try my best

756
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:35,800
Speaker 2: to be a good roommate, but another person in the

757
00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:38,160
Speaker 2: house seems like a lot to deal with, and we

758
00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 2: have an update. Am I overreacting for refusing to create

759
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:45,239
Speaker 2: my service dog so my teenage roommate's thirty year old

760
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 2: boyfriend feels comfortable. Part two. First Off, thank you guys

761
00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:50,720
Speaker 2: for all the comments and advice on my last post.

762
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 2: I appreciate everyone who told me to check my lease,

763
00:31:53,560 --> 00:31:56,720
Speaker 2: stand my ground, and yes, even the people who said

764
00:31:56,760 --> 00:32:01,920
Speaker 2: to call him a hobosexual, which I'm definitely not lol. Honestly,

765
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:03,880
Speaker 2: I did not expect things to turn out like this.

766
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 2: I'll link the previous posts in the comments for those interested.

767
00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:10,000
Speaker 2: So after our fight, my roommate asked if we could

768
00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:13,320
Speaker 2: all have another talk at the apartment. I agreed, hoping

769
00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:15,720
Speaker 2: it would ease up the tension since we still had

770
00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:17,960
Speaker 2: to live together while I figured out my next steps.

771
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:22,160
Speaker 2: We sat down in the living room. She immediately apologized

772
00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,760
Speaker 2: for how everything went down and talked about how she'd

773
00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:28,000
Speaker 2: been doing a lot of thinking about her relationship and

774
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:32,400
Speaker 2: a living situation. About five minutes in, her boyfriend showed

775
00:32:32,480 --> 00:32:35,280
Speaker 2: up with a bag full of dog treats and a

776
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:40,240
Speaker 2: full charcuterie board. He sat down and immediately apologized. He

777
00:32:40,360 --> 00:32:43,320
Speaker 2: told me that he talked about the entire situation in

778
00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:46,400
Speaker 2: his therapy session and it helped him realize how he

779
00:32:46,480 --> 00:32:50,560
Speaker 2: was being completely unreasonable about the situation. He said he'd

780
00:32:50,560 --> 00:32:54,480
Speaker 2: been selfish and ignorant about what service animals actually do.

781
00:32:55,160 --> 00:32:57,080
Speaker 2: He said he would prefer to stay with her because

782
00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,960
Speaker 2: he's in the process of buying a home. He thinks

783
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:02,200
Speaker 2: it would take about three to four months before he

784
00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:04,840
Speaker 2: can close on the house he wants and doesn't want

785
00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:07,960
Speaker 2: to renew his current lease for another full year. Then,

786
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:11,000
Speaker 2: he says, if he still moves in, he wants to

787
00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:15,600
Speaker 2: pay half my rent and cover all my dog's food.

788
00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:16,840
Speaker 1: Going forward day.

789
00:33:16,920 --> 00:33:20,160
Speaker 4: Okay, this is going in a very different direction than

790
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:20,560
Speaker 4: I thought.

791
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:23,440
Speaker 2: He called it the least I can do for being

792
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:25,960
Speaker 2: an a hole about a disability accommodation.

793
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:29,160
Speaker 1: Okay, I guess.

794
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:32,480
Speaker 2: My roommate nodded and said they discussed it and agreed.

795
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:36,160
Speaker 2: They both seemed genuinely sorry. I told him it's something

796
00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:39,680
Speaker 2: I need to think about. He says he completely understands

797
00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:42,440
Speaker 2: that he's going to give us our space, and then

798
00:33:42,440 --> 00:33:45,120
Speaker 2: he left. My roommate and I decided to take the

799
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:47,600
Speaker 2: charcuterie board and go on a picnic for the day

800
00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:48,560
Speaker 2: at a nearby park.

801
00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:51,480
Speaker 4: Okay, this was like I was really expecting this to

802
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 4: crash and burn. Two and now they're having a charcuterie board.

803
00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:59,080
Speaker 2: Okay, we both agreed it was best for us to

804
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:01,440
Speaker 2: just enjoy our time I'm together, and then I should

805
00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:04,320
Speaker 2: sleep on it before I make any decisions. She said

806
00:34:04,360 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 2: she wants me to be as comfortable as possible, which

807
00:34:07,440 --> 00:34:10,799
Speaker 2: honestly made me feel a lot better. The offer is

808
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:14,239
Speaker 2: really generous. We're talking like six hundred dollars plus a

809
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:17,640
Speaker 2: month between the rent and dog expenses. But I keep

810
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:20,360
Speaker 2: thinking about whether this will last or if the complaints

811
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 2: will start again once he's settled in. My sister, who

812
00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:26,520
Speaker 2: told me to compromise before now, says I should take

813
00:34:26,560 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 2: the deal because free rent is free rent. But my

814
00:34:29,640 --> 00:34:31,680
Speaker 2: mom thinks it sounds too good to be true and

815
00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:34,200
Speaker 2: I should still move out. Am I the a hole

816
00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:37,400
Speaker 2: for still being hesitant even after the apology and extremely

817
00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:40,000
Speaker 2: generous offer. No, we have some comments.

818
00:34:40,080 --> 00:34:43,480
Speaker 4: I don't think you're overacting or anything. I think that

819
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,960
Speaker 4: it's very smart to be cautious.

820
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:49,839
Speaker 2: Is a very quick switch from super against it to yeah,

821
00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:52,120
Speaker 2: I will pay part of the rent more I would

822
00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 2: be wary. Relevant comments comment to one, why do you

823
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:58,160
Speaker 2: have a teenage roommate? Opie says, last year of college

824
00:34:58,239 --> 00:34:59,280
Speaker 2: at off campus housing.

825
00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 4: I don't think that it's that crazy to be like

826
00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 4: a twenty three year old and a nineteen year.

827
00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:05,160
Speaker 2: Old living together. Commndre two, it does sound too good

828
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:07,879
Speaker 2: to be true. Will your dog be safe? Opie says

829
00:35:08,040 --> 00:35:11,279
Speaker 2: that is the most important question. Commenter three, Do not

830
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:14,560
Speaker 2: take the bait, Opie says, I don't want to, but

831
00:35:14,640 --> 00:35:18,200
Speaker 2: to be honest, it would really help me financially. Commodra

832
00:35:18,239 --> 00:35:21,440
Speaker 2: four says two K for being an a hole seems unlikely.

833
00:35:22,000 --> 00:35:24,600
Speaker 2: And if the house plan is legit is your roommate

834
00:35:24,680 --> 00:35:27,279
Speaker 2: moving out then too. Opie says, I think she would

835
00:35:27,320 --> 00:35:29,640
Speaker 2: finish up her lease here and then move out after

836
00:35:29,840 --> 00:35:33,279
Speaker 2: so technically yes. Commander five says it does sound too

837
00:35:33,320 --> 00:35:35,600
Speaker 2: good to be true. He probably means it for now,

838
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:38,319
Speaker 2: but next month he'll be complaining about it. I'd tell

839
00:35:38,360 --> 00:35:41,800
Speaker 2: them I appreciate the apology and the offer, but I'd

840
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:45,680
Speaker 2: still be moving out. Nothing personal. You just can't expect anybody,

841
00:35:46,320 --> 00:35:49,919
Speaker 2: anybody to follow through on an offer like that, Opie says.

842
00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:52,279
Speaker 2: Someone suggested I get a contract. What do you think?

843
00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:56,240
Speaker 2: Commander six says, not overreacting, look into getting a contract

844
00:35:56,239 --> 00:35:58,239
Speaker 2: for it with a time limit on how long he's

845
00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:00,839
Speaker 2: allowed to stay, et cetera. He says, oh, my god,

846
00:36:00,840 --> 00:36:04,919
Speaker 2: exactly if he's actually getting better and willing not only

847
00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:07,560
Speaker 2: to pay half of my rent but also all of

848
00:36:07,560 --> 00:36:10,239
Speaker 2: my dog's food. And he did say three to four

849
00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 2: months only. I'm thinking up about putting this in a

850
00:36:13,120 --> 00:36:15,840
Speaker 2: contract and see if he would actually sign and we

851
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:17,000
Speaker 2: have enough dal.

852
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:19,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think you see if he would sign it,

853
00:36:19,120 --> 00:36:20,640
Speaker 4: and then if he doesn't, then you move out.

854
00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:24,040
Speaker 2: And if he does, then cool, he's obligated. Now he's

855
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:27,600
Speaker 2: gotta am I over reacting for thinking my roommate's boyfriend

856
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:30,680
Speaker 2: is just going to stay over constantly after I said

857
00:36:30,760 --> 00:36:33,759
Speaker 2: he can't move in. No, thank you to this community

858
00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:35,920
Speaker 2: for all the help. I think everything is going back

859
00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:38,640
Speaker 2: to normal now, but I need advice again. Sorry, my

860
00:36:38,680 --> 00:36:42,120
Speaker 2: life is so messy right now. Okay. So I slept

861
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:44,040
Speaker 2: on it like I said I would, and this morning

862
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:46,799
Speaker 2: I asked my roommate if we could talk privately. I

863
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:50,480
Speaker 2: told her I really appreciated the apology and the conversation

864
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:53,320
Speaker 2: we had, but after thinking about it, I don't feel

865
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:57,279
Speaker 2: comfortable with him moving in. I explained that, regardless of

866
00:36:57,320 --> 00:36:59,919
Speaker 2: the money he's offering, I can't live with someone who

867
00:37:00,120 --> 00:37:04,239
Speaker 2: initially dismissed my medical needs so easily. I need to

868
00:37:04,239 --> 00:37:06,640
Speaker 2: feel safe in my own home, and I need to

869
00:37:06,640 --> 00:37:09,840
Speaker 2: know my service dog can do her job without restrictions

870
00:37:10,239 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 2: or attention. My roommate actually took it really well. She

871
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:17,120
Speaker 2: said she completely understands and that my decision doesn't change

872
00:37:17,160 --> 00:37:19,880
Speaker 2: anything between us. She told me she really enjoyed our

873
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:23,360
Speaker 2: time together yesterday, just talked in and eating our charcuterie board,

874
00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:26,040
Speaker 2: and that she's glad we were able to work everything through.

875
00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:30,320
Speaker 2: She said he won't be moving in and that's final. Later,

876
00:37:31,120 --> 00:37:33,840
Speaker 2: I overheard them talking in her room. From what I

877
00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:36,600
Speaker 2: could gather, it sounds like he came over last night

878
00:37:36,640 --> 00:37:40,120
Speaker 2: while I was sleeping, and from their conversation it seems

879
00:37:40,160 --> 00:37:42,680
Speaker 2: like he's planning to sleep over again tonight too.

880
00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:45,479
Speaker 4: Okay, well, you can't prevent that.

881
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:48,959
Speaker 2: He can still be allowed to come over. Yeah, And also,

882
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:50,759
Speaker 2: if you're in your room at that point with your

883
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:53,160
Speaker 2: service dog sleeping.

884
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:54,759
Speaker 4: I think it is I would be a little bit

885
00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:57,200
Speaker 4: unreasonable for you to be like, he can't even sleep,

886
00:37:57,239 --> 00:37:57,960
Speaker 4: he can't sleep over.

887
00:37:58,239 --> 00:37:59,879
Speaker 2: I think I'd be like, hey, look, I ever heard

888
00:37:59,920 --> 00:38:02,279
Speaker 2: the you don't need to sneak around. Yeah, he can

889
00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:02,919
Speaker 2: still come over.

890
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:06,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think I would specify like he's not living here,

891
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:07,720
Speaker 4: but sleeping over is different.

892
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:11,319
Speaker 2: Yeah. I'm trying not to jump to conclusions, but I'm

893
00:38:11,320 --> 00:38:13,359
Speaker 2: a little concerned this is just going to turn into

894
00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:17,160
Speaker 2: him just staying over constantly instead of officially moving. In

895
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,680
Speaker 2: top comments Commenter one, Now you go over your lease

896
00:38:20,719 --> 00:38:23,080
Speaker 2: and talk to your landlord. Time for you to find

897
00:38:23,160 --> 00:38:26,520
Speaker 2: a new place. Commenter two. He's just always going to

898
00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:28,560
Speaker 2: be around, even if he says he isn't living there.

899
00:38:28,960 --> 00:38:31,640
Speaker 2: I expect that he's slowly going to bring things into

900
00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:34,399
Speaker 2: a room, one backpack at a time. It's best you move.

901
00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:37,800
Speaker 2: Commo three. You have every right to address your concerns

902
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:40,880
Speaker 2: to your roommate you live there. You're not over reacting

903
00:38:40,920 --> 00:38:43,839
Speaker 2: at all. If I were you, honestly, I would not

904
00:38:43,880 --> 00:38:46,680
Speaker 2: feel comfortable with him being there at all. He sounds

905
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:49,719
Speaker 2: like a manipulator. I wouldn't take any dog food or

906
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 2: treats from him either for your dog. Let alone feed

907
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:55,880
Speaker 2: your dog whatever he gives you. He is trying to

908
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:58,760
Speaker 2: weasel his way in to live there and will continue

909
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:01,719
Speaker 2: to do so. Both are young, and with him being

910
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:04,680
Speaker 2: thirty years old, he will try to control every situation

911
00:39:04,800 --> 00:39:09,160
Speaker 2: that arises. Your friend should seriously think about the relationship

912
00:39:09,200 --> 00:39:12,759
Speaker 2: with him. Commander for says, so this dude is still

913
00:39:12,800 --> 00:39:16,279
Speaker 2: moving in anyway unofficially, You need to speak to your

914
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:19,479
Speaker 2: landlord about him always staying over, wanting to move in,

915
00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:21,800
Speaker 2: and now back to staying over when you said no.

916
00:39:22,800 --> 00:39:25,799
Speaker 2: Commander five says, not overreacting. You need to make a

917
00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:29,840
Speaker 2: final decision and move. This situation is not going to

918
00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:33,800
Speaker 2: get better, and her boyfriend will be there constantly. Soon

919
00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:36,720
Speaker 2: you'll come home and see he's moved all of his things.

920
00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:39,239
Speaker 2: At this point, you need to tell the landlord a

921
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:42,600
Speaker 2: third party is living there while still making arrangements to move.

922
00:39:43,080 --> 00:39:45,520
Speaker 2: You will not win while your roomy and boyfriend are

923
00:39:45,520 --> 00:39:48,920
Speaker 2: plotting behind your back. Please move and do not sign

924
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 2: another lease or you will regret it. That is the

925
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:53,359
Speaker 2: end of that story. I will say, I think those

926
00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:55,800
Speaker 2: comments are jumping to a lot of concludes. We be

927
00:39:55,960 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 2: too quick, because you can still have a conversation.

928
00:39:58,719 --> 00:40:00,160
Speaker 4: First, Yeah, it.

929
00:40:00,200 --> 00:40:02,839
Speaker 2: Might not be anything. He stayed over two nights, right,

930
00:40:02,920 --> 00:40:04,880
Speaker 2: two nights in a row is not crazy.

931
00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:06,320
Speaker 1: That's really not crazy.

932
00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:08,840
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, And that's the end of this story.

933
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:10,960
Speaker 2: We're gonna go to the next one.

934
00:40:11,160 --> 00:40:14,960
Speaker 4: My roommate's dog is compromising my health and he still

935
00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:16,200
Speaker 4: thinks I'm overreacting.

936
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:17,439
Speaker 2: It's time to move out.

937
00:40:17,600 --> 00:40:21,880
Speaker 4: I thirty one female, am debilitatingly disabled living with a

938
00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:24,840
Speaker 4: roommate twenty four male in a house with a modest

939
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:28,840
Speaker 4: fence to backyard. We have two dogs, my Chihuahua Poppy

940
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:32,520
Speaker 4: nine mail and his pit bull lab mix one point

941
00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:35,680
Speaker 4: five female, Hayley. I want to make it clear as

942
00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:38,080
Speaker 4: this may be found by people who know Meal or

943
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:42,160
Speaker 4: my roomy himself. I truly don't believe anyone is being malicious.

944
00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:44,600
Speaker 4: We're all trying our best with what we've got. By

945
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:46,719
Speaker 4: the way, this comes from throw At thirty twenty nine

946
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:48,960
Speaker 4: nineteen three nine five And if you want to sumit

947
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:51,080
Speaker 4: your own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime

948
00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:51,560
Speaker 4: subured it.

949
00:40:51,719 --> 00:40:53,200
Speaker 2: I'm Sophia, I'm Carly.

950
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:55,279
Speaker 4: We're here to give good advice groupfully, but we don't

951
00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:57,359
Speaker 4: have all the answers. We only know what we'd do,

952
00:40:57,800 --> 00:40:59,280
Speaker 4: So let's know what you would do in the comments

953
00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:03,160
Speaker 4: and he says, this is my family home, inherited from

954
00:41:03,200 --> 00:41:05,040
Speaker 4: my mother, as is my dog Poppy.

955
00:41:05,480 --> 00:41:06,040
Speaker 1: My roommate.

956
00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:09,840
Speaker 4: Let's call him Keith owns Haley. She was a rescue, literally,

957
00:41:09,880 --> 00:41:12,279
Speaker 4: a rescue from the street. Exactly a year and five

958
00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:14,919
Speaker 4: months ago. He was driving home at night in the rain,

959
00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:18,520
Speaker 4: saw a little shadow moving and found a tiny puppy

960
00:41:18,560 --> 00:41:21,760
Speaker 4: that immediately ran to his arms. She was skin and bones.

961
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,640
Speaker 4: You could count her ribs and see her hip bones.

962
00:41:24,920 --> 00:41:27,279
Speaker 4: We have no idea how she got out there or

963
00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:30,160
Speaker 4: who abandoned her, but it didn't matter. We had her now,

964
00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:33,719
Speaker 4: and Keith had always wanted his own dog. For context,

965
00:41:33,880 --> 00:41:36,759
Speaker 4: Keith and I cohabitate very well. We are both autistic,

966
00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:39,960
Speaker 4: non confrontational, and he is truly the best roommate I've

967
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:43,520
Speaker 4: ever had, even through all of our struggles. I think

968
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:45,839
Speaker 4: he's been living here for about three years, maybe four.

969
00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:48,200
Speaker 4: He wants to move out and do more with his

970
00:41:48,239 --> 00:41:52,040
Speaker 4: life than be in our craphole County, but the economy

971
00:41:52,120 --> 00:41:54,680
Speaker 4: sucks and he won't find a place cheaper. I don't

972
00:41:54,760 --> 00:41:58,440
Speaker 4: charge him rent. The rent is just utilities and internet

973
00:41:58,520 --> 00:42:02,080
Speaker 4: split between us. It's great having a mere and sometimes

974
00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:04,000
Speaker 4: if I need help up the stairs or if I'm

975
00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:07,000
Speaker 4: having a seizure, he can come help. But as long

976
00:42:07,040 --> 00:42:10,600
Speaker 4: as he'sier, so is Hailey. The previous year, I had

977
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:14,320
Speaker 4: volunteered at a local animal shelter. The workers did their best,

978
00:42:14,360 --> 00:42:16,800
Speaker 4: but I knew how scary it was for the animals

979
00:42:17,160 --> 00:42:20,080
Speaker 4: and how rough it was for pitfulls and pitbull mixes

980
00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:23,640
Speaker 4: to get adopted. I couldn't say no to a skeletal

981
00:42:23,640 --> 00:42:26,400
Speaker 4: puppy found in the rain, and so Haley joined the family.

982
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:30,759
Speaker 4: She is a very energetic, playful pup who always just

983
00:42:30,800 --> 00:42:34,600
Speaker 4: wants your attention in love. But dogs require training as

984
00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:36,799
Speaker 4: much as I Sometimes let Haley chill in my bag

985
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:38,960
Speaker 4: and I'll hug her and scruffle her big ol' ears.

986
00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:42,880
Speaker 4: I am often terrified of Hailey, and so is Poppy.

987
00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:46,240
Speaker 4: Terr eyes may sound harsh, but when she's too playful

988
00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:50,440
Speaker 4: and energetic, I am legitimately scared, and equally scared for

989
00:42:50,480 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 4: Poppy when he's being hired. Hailey may still be a puppy,

990
00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:57,560
Speaker 4: but she's fully grown physically. For context, A couple of

991
00:42:57,560 --> 00:43:02,319
Speaker 4: my disabilities are Eller's dam loos, cindro fibromalgia. I both

992
00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:07,080
Speaker 4: iroidism and DNS seizures non epileptic. I stay awake during them,

993
00:43:07,080 --> 00:43:09,560
Speaker 4: but they suck to inder. In short, I am in

994
00:43:09,680 --> 00:43:12,799
Speaker 4: constant pain. I'm chronically fatigued to the point of a

995
00:43:12,840 --> 00:43:16,920
Speaker 4: pseudo cataplexy. My body is incredibly weak and fragile, and

996
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:19,120
Speaker 4: I always have to be ready to handle a seizure

997
00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:22,880
Speaker 4: on my own. No, I cannot afford an in home carer.

998
00:43:23,120 --> 00:43:26,600
Speaker 4: And yes, I have applied for government assistance more than once.

999
00:43:26,920 --> 00:43:29,200
Speaker 1: And know they will not help. And that's why I

1000
00:43:29,280 --> 00:43:29,919
Speaker 1: work from home.

1001
00:43:30,239 --> 00:43:33,000
Speaker 4: A huge, playful pibble puppy is a wonderful dog to have,

1002
00:43:33,200 --> 00:43:36,560
Speaker 4: just not for someone like me. Keith is a hard worker.

1003
00:43:36,760 --> 00:43:39,719
Speaker 4: He works two jobs and does freelance work, so he's

1004
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:41,759
Speaker 4: out of the house most of the time. He does

1005
00:43:41,800 --> 00:43:44,440
Speaker 4: his best with Haley. It's agreed upon for both of

1006
00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:48,760
Speaker 4: us that we are responsible for our own dogs needs, walks.

1007
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:49,400
Speaker 1: Food, et cetera.

1008
00:43:49,520 --> 00:43:52,080
Speaker 4: But while I'm home alone with Haley and Poppy, it

1009
00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:55,239
Speaker 4: is inherently my responsibility to make sure they don't get

1010
00:43:55,239 --> 00:43:58,440
Speaker 4: into a fight. Haley just wants to play. She's not

1011
00:43:58,480 --> 00:44:00,520
Speaker 4: a mean dog, but she doesn't know her own strength.

1012
00:44:01,040 --> 00:44:04,240
Speaker 4: She's nearly knocked me over jumping on me. She's bashed

1013
00:44:04,280 --> 00:44:06,160
Speaker 4: my jaw with her skull when my head gets too

1014
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:09,280
Speaker 4: close to hers. She rushes at me because she's excited

1015
00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:11,960
Speaker 4: to see me, but I get scared. Right before I

1016
00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:14,120
Speaker 4: decided to make this throwaway and write this, I was

1017
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:16,240
Speaker 4: trying to play with her and my shoulder was pulled

1018
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:19,040
Speaker 4: out of its sockets in seconds because of how loose

1019
00:44:19,080 --> 00:44:21,360
Speaker 4: my tendons are from eds. It'd pop back in, but

1020
00:44:21,440 --> 00:44:24,640
Speaker 4: it hurts so much. Sometimes her and Poppy will play

1021
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:27,920
Speaker 4: just fine. Poppy goes belly out play sneezing, but it

1022
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:31,280
Speaker 4: can escalate to squealing if we're not watching or listening closely.

1023
00:44:31,960 --> 00:44:34,799
Speaker 4: Poppy is nine. He's a middle aged man who likes

1024
00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:37,600
Speaker 4: fun but has his limits. And when he doesn't want

1025
00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:40,759
Speaker 4: to play anymore, Haley can't read the signs. I just

1026
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:42,880
Speaker 4: had to go break them up. As I was writing

1027
00:44:42,920 --> 00:44:45,279
Speaker 4: this sentence, she had him pinned in the corner of

1028
00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:48,680
Speaker 4: the couch. Don't worry, he's fine. My home office is

1029
00:44:48,719 --> 00:44:50,839
Speaker 4: directly connected to the living room, where they have their

1030
00:44:50,840 --> 00:44:53,279
Speaker 4: water and toys. I keep the door open to be

1031
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:55,120
Speaker 4: able to keep an eye out, but I still have

1032
00:44:55,239 --> 00:44:58,000
Speaker 4: work to do. Sometimes I have a seizure and need

1033
00:44:58,040 --> 00:45:00,000
Speaker 4: to take a nap. I can't watch them at all

1034
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:03,399
Speaker 4: all times. Of course, there are plenty of times where

1035
00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:05,560
Speaker 4: Poppy is just chilling with me and when Haley is

1036
00:45:05,560 --> 00:45:08,080
Speaker 4: hanging out in Keith's room, and of course Haley is

1037
00:45:08,120 --> 00:45:10,279
Speaker 4: a kennel, it's the right size for her, but there's

1038
00:45:10,360 --> 00:45:13,160
Speaker 4: nothing in there. We've got to remove all blankets and

1039
00:45:13,200 --> 00:45:15,960
Speaker 4: pillows from the living room because Haley will chew them up.

1040
00:45:16,320 --> 00:45:19,480
Speaker 4: Obviously it's something from puppyhood, but it's still a problem.

1041
00:45:19,640 --> 00:45:22,320
Speaker 4: She has no boodog bed, at least in her kennel.

1042
00:45:22,600 --> 00:45:25,000
Speaker 4: I think Keith has one for her in his room,

1043
00:45:25,080 --> 00:45:27,600
Speaker 4: but I don't go in there. We're very private people,

1044
00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:29,319
Speaker 4: so when she has to go in there, such as

1045
00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:30,960
Speaker 4: when Keith and I are both out of the house,

1046
00:45:31,480 --> 00:45:35,200
Speaker 4: it's very cold and uncomfortable. I hate putting her in there,

1047
00:45:35,239 --> 00:45:38,120
Speaker 4: but sometimes I just can't handle it. Poppy will just

1048
00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:40,160
Speaker 4: be trying to walk to the water bowl and Haley

1049
00:45:40,200 --> 00:45:42,880
Speaker 4: will pounce on him. She's like ten times his size

1050
00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:46,239
Speaker 4: and her head is bigger than his body. Remember this

1051
00:45:46,280 --> 00:45:48,840
Speaker 4: is a pitbull lab mix and a Chihuaba. She's just

1052
00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:51,880
Speaker 4: trying to play. The pounce is a playbow, but that

1053
00:45:51,920 --> 00:45:55,000
Speaker 4: doesn't change the fact it is terrifying Poppy and in

1054
00:45:55,040 --> 00:45:58,240
Speaker 4: turn freaking me out. I can only do so much.

1055
00:45:58,960 --> 00:46:01,520
Speaker 2: We're it to pot yeah, I need to pause just

1056
00:46:01,520 --> 00:46:04,279
Speaker 2: to say I do feel like there is some Like

1057
00:46:04,320 --> 00:46:06,399
Speaker 2: I know you're like, I'm not scared of pit bulls. Yeah,

1058
00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:08,520
Speaker 2: I think a pitbulls.

1059
00:46:08,719 --> 00:46:10,120
Speaker 1: It does feel like there is some buy it.

1060
00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:12,799
Speaker 2: I think there still is some now. I think most

1061
00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:14,080
Speaker 2: of us just because she's a puppy.

1062
00:46:14,200 --> 00:46:16,760
Speaker 4: Yes, I think all of it's because she's a poppy.

1063
00:46:16,760 --> 00:46:19,120
Speaker 2: Of it because she's I would exactly I was gonna

1064
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:20,680
Speaker 2: say puppy be The only only thing I was gonna

1065
00:46:20,719 --> 00:46:24,040
Speaker 2: say was their size difference. Yes, can we just put

1066
00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:25,840
Speaker 2: Haley in some obedience training?

1067
00:46:26,040 --> 00:46:27,360
Speaker 1: That's exactly what I was saying.

1068
00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:30,560
Speaker 4: I would go to Keith and say, hey, we're having

1069
00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:33,440
Speaker 4: some issues because whenever you're gone, obviously I have to

1070
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:36,680
Speaker 4: take care of Haley and I just am not equipped

1071
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:39,440
Speaker 4: for that. And because you are not paying rent, can

1072
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:40,840
Speaker 4: you pay for obedience training?

1073
00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:42,480
Speaker 2: Very simple, very easy.

1074
00:46:42,560 --> 00:46:45,240
Speaker 4: Whenever I bring up this to Keith, to my memory,

1075
00:46:45,239 --> 00:46:48,080
Speaker 4: he always just says something like, yeah, well, she's still puppy,

1076
00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:49,960
Speaker 4: or yeah, sometimes she has the zuomies.

1077
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:51,120
Speaker 1: Just take Poppy to.

1078
00:46:51,120 --> 00:46:53,080
Speaker 4: Another room and let her run in circles in the

1079
00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:55,680
Speaker 4: living room. She's still a puppy, but she's at least

1080
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:57,160
Speaker 4: a year and five months.

1081
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,640
Speaker 1: Old for a Pible mix, She's nearly full grown.

1082
00:47:00,280 --> 00:47:03,240
Speaker 4: That crazy puppy energy and lack of boundaries and restraint

1083
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:06,480
Speaker 4: isn't going to go away. It is going to solidify,

1084
00:47:07,440 --> 00:47:09,160
Speaker 4: not necessarily.

1085
00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:10,960
Speaker 1: If you got training. I mean, it won't go away

1086
00:47:10,960 --> 00:47:12,120
Speaker 1: if you don't train the dog.

1087
00:47:12,360 --> 00:47:15,279
Speaker 4: I've messaged Keith today about this. Part of what I

1088
00:47:15,320 --> 00:47:18,000
Speaker 4: said was I know you're busy with essentially three jobs

1089
00:47:18,080 --> 00:47:20,800
Speaker 4: right now, but please at least look up some training

1090
00:47:20,840 --> 00:47:23,239
Speaker 4: methods that you could practice with her. Great, then I

1091
00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:26,319
Speaker 4: could maybe also practice because he is frankly, just not

1092
00:47:26,400 --> 00:47:28,839
Speaker 4: doing enough to train these behaviors out of her, and

1093
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:31,400
Speaker 4: I don't think it's fair for me, this severely disabled

1094
00:47:31,400 --> 00:47:33,440
Speaker 4: woman who's not even the owner of the dog, to

1095
00:47:33,560 --> 00:47:36,400
Speaker 4: spearhead that effort. I do ask him about what commands

1096
00:47:36,440 --> 00:47:39,719
Speaker 4: he uses with her, so communication is consistent, but there's

1097
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:43,040
Speaker 4: just not enough. His response made me upset. I started

1098
00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 4: my text by telling him how she popped my shoulder out,

1099
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:48,120
Speaker 4: and the first thing he said was, I mean this

1100
00:47:48,239 --> 00:47:51,120
Speaker 4: in the nicest way possible, but there's no way she

1101
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:55,160
Speaker 4: dislocated your shoulder. Yes she did. It's one of the

1102
00:47:55,160 --> 00:47:58,279
Speaker 4: most common afflictions for people with DS. Then he just

1103
00:47:58,360 --> 00:48:02,360
Speaker 4: asked was it diagnosed? Like, yes, Keith, the same doctor appointment,

1104
00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:05,560
Speaker 4: I was diagnosed with fibro. He avoided talking about traininger

1105
00:48:05,640 --> 00:48:07,360
Speaker 4: by just saying not to play with her like that

1106
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:09,960
Speaker 4: and to put Haley in her kennel more often. Again,

1107
00:48:10,040 --> 00:48:13,080
Speaker 4: we're both autistic and non confrontational, and I back down,

1108
00:48:13,120 --> 00:48:15,920
Speaker 4: immediately reiterating that I know he's got a lot on

1109
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 4: his plate, and we just switched to talking about needing

1110
00:48:18,120 --> 00:48:21,000
Speaker 4: to pick up garbage bags. I don't know what to do.

1111
00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:24,400
Speaker 4: I'm tired, I'm in pain. I love Haley, but she

1112
00:48:24,480 --> 00:48:27,640
Speaker 4: makes me so anxious. Poppy's a brave boy who still

1113
00:48:27,640 --> 00:48:31,040
Speaker 4: plays with Haley, but ultimately I know he's afraid of her.

1114
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:32,800
Speaker 1: Am I overreacting?

1115
00:48:33,040 --> 00:48:33,480
Speaker 2: And edit?

1116
00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:35,880
Speaker 4: Both dogs have been neutered in Spade and there.

1117
00:48:35,800 --> 00:48:36,400
Speaker 1: Is an update.

1118
00:48:36,480 --> 00:48:37,680
Speaker 2: You need to be confrontational.

1119
00:48:37,760 --> 00:48:39,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, it sucks, and I know you don't want it,

1120
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:40,680
Speaker 4: but that's the only answer.

1121
00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:43,080
Speaker 2: It's not gonna solve if one of you doesn't like

1122
00:48:43,239 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 2: start talking.

1123
00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:46,120
Speaker 4: Absolutely, you're just gonna get to a point where you're

1124
00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:47,440
Speaker 4: like sick of it, and then you tell them to

1125
00:48:47,480 --> 00:48:49,520
Speaker 4: move out, or you're gonna do nothing and then keep

1126
00:48:49,560 --> 00:48:52,200
Speaker 4: getting hurt or Poppy's getting hurt because you don't train

1127
00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:56,480
Speaker 4: your pitbull. And again, pipples are lovely, lovely animals if

1128
00:48:56,520 --> 00:49:00,239
Speaker 4: you train them. Any dog can behave badly if you

1129
00:49:00,280 --> 00:49:02,880
Speaker 4: do not train the dog, because dogs, I mean, unless

1130
00:49:02,880 --> 00:49:05,160
Speaker 4: you're having like a little chihuala. Even Chihuahas could be

1131
00:49:05,200 --> 00:49:09,440
Speaker 4: like chiuhash yeah, when they're not trained. And I think

1132
00:49:09,480 --> 00:49:11,840
Speaker 4: I think oftentimes people are just like, ah, yeah, whatever,

1133
00:49:11,880 --> 00:49:14,200
Speaker 4: I don't need to train this dog. It'll just kind

1134
00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:16,160
Speaker 4: of figure it out. It's not how dogs work. They're

1135
00:49:16,160 --> 00:49:20,520
Speaker 4: wild animals, they have been domesticated, but you still have

1136
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:21,479
Speaker 4: to train them.

1137
00:49:21,800 --> 00:49:23,359
Speaker 1: Thank you for the advice so far.

1138
00:49:23,560 --> 00:49:26,360
Speaker 4: It really opened my eyes to how dangerous this actually

1139
00:49:26,440 --> 00:49:29,680
Speaker 4: could be. I talked to Keith about ten minutes ago.

1140
00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:32,439
Speaker 4: I started by asking if he walks Haley before work,

1141
00:49:32,480 --> 00:49:35,839
Speaker 4: as someone suggested, and he said no, he can't really

1142
00:49:35,880 --> 00:49:38,359
Speaker 4: do it. I started talking about how she needs more

1143
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:41,960
Speaker 4: exercise and more training, and he basically just evated everything,

1144
00:49:42,000 --> 00:49:43,920
Speaker 4: saying you didn't know what I wanted from him, and

1145
00:49:43,960 --> 00:49:46,360
Speaker 4: that he's tried things before and they haven't worked. He

1146
00:49:46,440 --> 00:49:48,439
Speaker 4: brought up how when Poppy and Haley are with him.

1147
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:51,480
Speaker 4: They behaved just fine. I reminded him. I know he's

1148
00:49:51,520 --> 00:49:54,000
Speaker 4: a very hard worker and that he works two jobs.

1149
00:49:54,360 --> 00:49:56,439
Speaker 4: He's out of the house most of the time. If

1150
00:49:56,480 --> 00:49:58,360
Speaker 4: not in bed where Poppy is with me with the

1151
00:49:58,400 --> 00:50:01,480
Speaker 4: door closed, I'm in my office with the door opened

1152
00:50:01,480 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 4: directly to the living room all day. He said that

1153
00:50:04,520 --> 00:50:07,320
Speaker 4: she's still Poppy and that she's more labb than pitbull,

1154
00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:10,840
Speaker 4: which may be true, but regardless of her breed, Haley

1155
00:50:10,920 --> 00:50:13,400
Speaker 4: is a dog who doesn't know her own strength. It

1156
00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:16,799
Speaker 4: isn't trained. It was really hard, but I brought up

1157
00:50:16,800 --> 00:50:18,600
Speaker 4: how he told me that one day he wants to

1158
00:50:18,680 --> 00:50:21,000
Speaker 4: leave the country. I asked if he would take Hayley

1159
00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:24,760
Speaker 4: with him, and he said he'd Rehomer. I slowly hinted

1160
00:50:24,800 --> 00:50:27,479
Speaker 4: up talking to my family about that, and his face

1161
00:50:27,600 --> 00:50:31,360
Speaker 4: changed so quickly it unnerved me. He usually has a

1162
00:50:31,400 --> 00:50:34,640
Speaker 4: slightly deadpan, deer in headlights look, just part of his

1163
00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:38,640
Speaker 4: flavor of autism. He said what, and he looked at

1164
00:50:38,640 --> 00:50:41,880
Speaker 4: me as if I was considering euthanizing her. Then he

1165
00:50:42,040 --> 00:50:44,560
Speaker 4: just said, don't do that, and I dropped it. Being

1166
00:50:44,640 --> 00:50:49,239
Speaker 4: non confrontational his roommates works great until there's something worth confronting.

1167
00:50:49,400 --> 00:50:51,160
Speaker 4: In the end, he said, well, I'll just put her

1168
00:50:51,200 --> 00:50:52,719
Speaker 4: in her kennel when I go to work and take

1169
00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:53,719
Speaker 4: her out when I come home.

1170
00:50:54,160 --> 00:50:57,919
Speaker 2: I need you to be confrontational again, and I need

1171
00:50:57,920 --> 00:50:59,359
Speaker 2: this man to rehome his dog.

1172
00:50:59,520 --> 00:51:03,160
Speaker 4: He can not own this dock. This is unacceptable. Something

1173
00:51:03,160 --> 00:51:06,000
Speaker 4: I didn't mention is that throughout this whole conversation I

1174
00:51:06,040 --> 00:51:08,960
Speaker 4: had a glove on holding Poppy's collar covered in crap.

1175
00:51:09,440 --> 00:51:10,440
Speaker 1: When I wasn't looking.

1176
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:13,400
Speaker 4: Hailey must have taken a crap and Poppy rolled around

1177
00:51:13,400 --> 00:51:16,279
Speaker 4: in it. We had this whole conversation right after I

1178
00:51:16,320 --> 00:51:19,520
Speaker 4: was done bathing Poppy. I probably would have kept talking

1179
00:51:19,520 --> 00:51:21,719
Speaker 4: to him were it not for wanting to take care

1180
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:25,120
Speaker 4: of the stinking, soiled collar I was holding two feet

1181
00:51:25,120 --> 00:51:28,399
Speaker 4: away from me the whole time. Anyway, this compromise is

1182
00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:31,200
Speaker 4: not good. It will only make her more antsy. Or

1183
00:51:31,239 --> 00:51:34,080
Speaker 4: kennel is cold, undecorated, no bed.

1184
00:51:34,440 --> 00:51:35,439
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna buy them.

1185
00:51:35,640 --> 00:51:38,480
Speaker 4: She's not my dog, and I could barely afford Poppy

1186
00:51:38,480 --> 00:51:40,800
Speaker 4: a new code after Haley chewed up his last one.

1187
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:43,920
Speaker 4: I just told him, I hope nothing bad happens. I'll

1188
00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:48,359
Speaker 4: left it again if anything significant does. I hope nothing does, though,

1189
00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:49,759
Speaker 4: and that's the end.

1190
00:51:49,640 --> 00:51:50,160
Speaker 6: Of the story.

1191
00:51:50,680 --> 00:51:52,840
Speaker 2: Okay, so happened.

1192
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:54,440
Speaker 1: You gotta work on the confrontation.

1193
00:51:54,800 --> 00:51:57,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's gotta be like a get rid of the dog,

1194
00:51:57,520 --> 00:52:01,239
Speaker 2: move out, do something. You're getting hurt. You can't just

1195
00:52:01,360 --> 00:52:02,319
Speaker 2: keep staying in that.

1196
00:52:02,719 --> 00:52:05,319
Speaker 1: No, and that's the end of this story. We're going

1197
00:52:05,320 --> 00:52:07,000
Speaker 1: on to the next one.

1198
00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:09,160
Speaker 3: Hey y'all, it's John Ogi host here. We're gonna get

1199
00:52:09,160 --> 00:52:09,720
Speaker 3: back to the stories.

1200
00:52:09,760 --> 00:52:11,239
Speaker 2: But here's a quick three minute break from as for

1201
00:52:11,320 --> 00:52:15,520
Speaker 2: more sponsors. My roommate refused to clean and blamed me

1202
00:52:15,960 --> 00:52:16,640
Speaker 2: for the mess.

1203
00:52:17,080 --> 00:52:19,160
Speaker 1: Get out of this house.

1204
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:22,200
Speaker 2: I twenty nine mail have been living with a longtime

1205
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:25,160
Speaker 2: friend twenty eight mail for a little over a year now,

1206
00:52:25,560 --> 00:52:28,440
Speaker 2: and we had lived together for around three years prior

1207
00:52:28,560 --> 00:52:31,319
Speaker 2: with no issue other than with the other people who

1208
00:52:31,360 --> 00:52:34,200
Speaker 2: lived in the house. Now let's get to my current

1209
00:52:34,239 --> 00:52:38,960
Speaker 2: living situation. By the way, this comes from the Bee Legion,

1210
00:52:39,080 --> 00:52:41,440
Speaker 2: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

1211
00:52:41,560 --> 00:52:44,920
Speaker 2: to the r slash Okay story times sub reddit. I'm Carly,

1212
00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:48,719
Speaker 2: I'm Sophia, and we're here to give good advice. We

1213
00:52:48,760 --> 00:52:51,360
Speaker 2: don't have all the answers. We only know what we

1214
00:52:51,360 --> 00:52:52,759
Speaker 2: would do, So let us know what you would do

1215
00:52:52,760 --> 00:52:55,799
Speaker 2: in the comments no pizzas. I told him when we

1216
00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:58,240
Speaker 2: moved in that I was fine with cleaning the apartment

1217
00:52:58,320 --> 00:53:01,680
Speaker 2: once a week, minus his room, of course, as long

1218
00:53:01,719 --> 00:53:04,359
Speaker 2: as he cleaned up after himself, which he agreed with.

1219
00:53:04,719 --> 00:53:08,200
Speaker 2: Almost immediately, he started complaining to our mutual friends that

1220
00:53:08,280 --> 00:53:11,680
Speaker 2: I was cleaning out of spite and began leaving dirty

1221
00:53:11,680 --> 00:53:14,759
Speaker 2: dishes and trash all over the apartment. I had to

1222
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:17,400
Speaker 2: talk with him again to ensure him that when I

1223
00:53:17,440 --> 00:53:19,600
Speaker 2: said I would clean the apartment every week, it was

1224
00:53:19,640 --> 00:53:23,120
Speaker 2: because I enjoy cleaning, which I very much do, but

1225
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 2: if he could get better at cleaning up after himself,

1226
00:53:25,680 --> 00:53:28,640
Speaker 2: I would appreciate it. Later that night, he called one

1227
00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:30,920
Speaker 2: of our mutual friends and told him he couldn't live

1228
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:34,360
Speaker 2: with me, that I am crazy about how clean I

1229
00:53:34,400 --> 00:53:36,960
Speaker 2: want the house, and he all but gave up cleaning

1230
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:41,319
Speaker 2: up after himself. Oh my god, Sophia is like malfunctioning.

1231
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:46,040
Speaker 2: What before He would order food and leave all the

1232
00:53:46,160 --> 00:53:49,239
Speaker 2: trash on the living room table, and dishes would go

1233
00:53:49,320 --> 00:53:52,399
Speaker 2: uncleaned for at least three days and would not get

1234
00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:56,040
Speaker 2: put away once cleaned. He would constantly leave his shoes

1235
00:53:56,080 --> 00:53:57,960
Speaker 2: in front of the door instead of picking them up

1236
00:53:57,960 --> 00:53:59,879
Speaker 2: and putting them on the shoe rack less than a foot.

1237
00:54:00,520 --> 00:54:03,200
Speaker 2: It got so bad after we talked that I told

1238
00:54:03,280 --> 00:54:05,719
Speaker 2: him I would not be resigning the lease because I

1239
00:54:05,760 --> 00:54:08,880
Speaker 2: couldn't eat without having to clean up after him. For

1240
00:54:09,040 --> 00:54:11,800
Speaker 2: six months, he got better and I decided I would

1241
00:54:11,840 --> 00:54:14,879
Speaker 2: stay and get a dog well after having to talk

1242
00:54:14,920 --> 00:54:18,200
Speaker 2: with him again, because he would lock my dog out

1243
00:54:18,239 --> 00:54:20,640
Speaker 2: of my room where his crate was when I wasn't home.

1244
00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:23,120
Speaker 2: He said he did it because my dog didn't like

1245
00:54:23,239 --> 00:54:26,479
Speaker 2: him and his then boyfriend. The puppy had just gotten

1246
00:54:26,520 --> 00:54:29,200
Speaker 2: home a week before. He told me that the dog

1247
00:54:29,320 --> 00:54:31,399
Speaker 2: needed to like him if he was going to live

1248
00:54:31,440 --> 00:54:34,680
Speaker 2: with him. My dog wouldn't leave my room without me

1249
00:54:34,800 --> 00:54:37,400
Speaker 2: for two months after the week his boyfriend spent at

1250
00:54:37,400 --> 00:54:40,600
Speaker 2: the house. Now he doesn't care about anything. My roommate

1251
00:54:40,640 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 2: will cook, drop stuff on the floor like peppers and

1252
00:54:43,480 --> 00:54:47,280
Speaker 2: onions and not clean them up. He leaves dirty dishes

1253
00:54:47,320 --> 00:54:49,880
Speaker 2: on the coffee table in the living room. We don't

1254
00:54:49,880 --> 00:54:52,040
Speaker 2: have a table to eat up because my roommate believes

1255
00:54:52,080 --> 00:54:54,240
Speaker 2: it would ruin the flow of the apartment.

1256
00:54:54,320 --> 00:54:55,839
Speaker 4: Why are we living with this guy?

1257
00:54:56,239 --> 00:54:58,640
Speaker 2: Today is my cleaning day. The sink is full of

1258
00:54:58,680 --> 00:55:02,040
Speaker 2: dishes from his two days off, The dishwasher was run

1259
00:55:02,200 --> 00:55:04,440
Speaker 2: half full, and his shoes are on the floor in

1260
00:55:04,440 --> 00:55:06,880
Speaker 2: front of the closet with the shoe rack. All this

1261
00:55:07,000 --> 00:55:09,600
Speaker 2: dude does is complain that either I want the apartment

1262
00:55:09,680 --> 00:55:13,080
Speaker 2: crazy clean constantly, or he complains if I don't clean

1263
00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:16,480
Speaker 2: up after him. I stopped using the dishwasher for a week.

1264
00:55:16,640 --> 00:55:19,480
Speaker 2: After the fourth day of him emptying it twice, he

1265
00:55:19,560 --> 00:55:22,200
Speaker 2: left a note that said clean on it, and I

1266
00:55:22,239 --> 00:55:24,280
Speaker 2: could hear him on the phone with his friend complaining

1267
00:55:24,320 --> 00:55:27,320
Speaker 2: that he's had to empty the dishwasher like three times

1268
00:55:27,360 --> 00:55:31,040
Speaker 2: this week. So Reddit, am I the bad roommate here? Update?

1269
00:55:31,239 --> 00:55:33,680
Speaker 2: I twenty nine mail have posted about my roommate twenty

1270
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:35,879
Speaker 2: eight mail here before, so I'm not going to bring

1271
00:55:35,960 --> 00:55:39,120
Speaker 2: up everything again. But i need to vent about my

1272
00:55:39,200 --> 00:55:43,080
Speaker 2: two days off because I'm going to explode. I planned

1273
00:55:43,120 --> 00:55:45,879
Speaker 2: for about a month to clean the carpets. I talked

1274
00:55:45,880 --> 00:55:47,839
Speaker 2: to my roommate Jeff and asked him if he could

1275
00:55:47,880 --> 00:55:50,400
Speaker 2: give me half the cost for the rentals if I

1276
00:55:50,520 --> 00:55:53,640
Speaker 2: did the work, which he agreed to. I told him

1277
00:55:53,640 --> 00:55:55,720
Speaker 2: I'd do his room as well if he took everything

1278
00:55:55,719 --> 00:55:57,680
Speaker 2: off the floor, because I knew it would add maybe

1279
00:55:57,719 --> 00:56:00,640
Speaker 2: twenty minutes of work for me. Big whoop. He said

1280
00:56:00,680 --> 00:56:03,200
Speaker 2: he would appreciate that. So I plan on cleaning the

1281
00:56:03,239 --> 00:56:05,760
Speaker 2: apartment and the rugs in one big day of cleaning.

1282
00:56:06,440 --> 00:56:08,840
Speaker 2: I came home Sunday night, the day before I was

1283
00:56:08,840 --> 00:56:11,399
Speaker 2: going to clean the apartment, and the sink was full

1284
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:15,600
Speaker 2: of dishes. He had dry dishes that were not clean

1285
00:56:16,239 --> 00:56:18,960
Speaker 2: and had been sitting on the drying rack for the

1286
00:56:19,120 --> 00:56:22,319
Speaker 2: entire week. He ran the dishwasher with it being less

1287
00:56:22,320 --> 00:56:24,319
Speaker 2: than half full so we wouldn't have to finish his

1288
00:56:24,440 --> 00:56:28,160
Speaker 2: dishes or put the dishwasher away, because you know, running

1289
00:56:28,239 --> 00:56:31,520
Speaker 2: it is half the work. The stovetop was covered in

1290
00:56:31,560 --> 00:56:34,360
Speaker 2: dirty pans with a small layer of water. Trick every

1291
00:56:34,600 --> 00:56:35,680
Speaker 2: lazy butt uses.

1292
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:36,759
Speaker 6: Now here.

1293
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:40,040
Speaker 2: I am Tuesday night, my last day off, and all

1294
00:56:40,080 --> 00:56:42,760
Speaker 2: I have to do is laundry. But I can't because

1295
00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:45,320
Speaker 2: someone one hundred percent of my roommate put a load

1296
00:56:45,360 --> 00:56:48,000
Speaker 2: in our building shared washing machine at nine am. It

1297
00:56:48,080 --> 00:56:50,320
Speaker 2: is currently eight thirty pm and they are still in

1298
00:56:50,360 --> 00:56:51,120
Speaker 2: the washing machine.

1299
00:56:51,160 --> 00:56:54,360
Speaker 1: And that's what moved. Yeah, dude, I said.

1300
00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:56,799
Speaker 2: This man to move, like, hey, dude, can you move

1301
00:56:56,840 --> 00:56:58,920
Speaker 2: your clothes? If not, can I move your clothes?

1302
00:56:59,040 --> 00:57:00,799
Speaker 4: I'm not even texting him. I'm like, oh, I didn't

1303
00:57:00,840 --> 00:57:03,359
Speaker 4: know they were yours. The sheer laundry. I'm popping them

1304
00:57:03,360 --> 00:57:05,160
Speaker 4: on the in a basket.

1305
00:57:05,200 --> 00:57:08,080
Speaker 2: Maybe, Oh, that's sure, basket buildings. I thought it was

1306
00:57:08,120 --> 00:57:09,040
Speaker 2: their units. Sure.

1307
00:57:09,200 --> 00:57:12,120
Speaker 4: No, it's just he is assuming, which they probably are.

1308
00:57:12,480 --> 00:57:14,040
Speaker 4: I'm just popping them on top of the thing.

1309
00:57:14,440 --> 00:57:16,760
Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm overreacting, but this crap is

1310
00:57:16,840 --> 00:57:19,720
Speaker 2: driving me crazy. I don't know what to do. I

1311
00:57:19,760 --> 00:57:22,360
Speaker 2: thirty mail have posted about my old roommate thirty mail

1312
00:57:22,400 --> 00:57:25,080
Speaker 2: here before. I took the advice some of you gave

1313
00:57:25,120 --> 00:57:28,439
Speaker 2: me and flat out stopped cleaning except after myself. After

1314
00:57:28,440 --> 00:57:30,520
Speaker 2: a few weeks, I couldn't stand to be in any

1315
00:57:30,600 --> 00:57:32,960
Speaker 2: of the common areas for any amount of time because

1316
00:57:33,000 --> 00:57:36,640
Speaker 2: of either the smell or the mess, so I started

1317
00:57:36,680 --> 00:57:39,000
Speaker 2: secluding myself and my dog to my room until the

1318
00:57:39,120 --> 00:57:41,080
Speaker 2: end of the lease. I had to start keeping my

1319
00:57:41,120 --> 00:57:43,160
Speaker 2: dog in my room because he either fed him a

1320
00:57:43,200 --> 00:57:46,480
Speaker 2: pizza with peppers, onions, garlic, spinach, and lots of cheese,

1321
00:57:47,120 --> 00:57:49,040
Speaker 2: or my dog got a hold of large amount of

1322
00:57:49,040 --> 00:57:53,240
Speaker 2: scraps enough to cause his kid needs to start failing. Thankfully,

1323
00:57:53,320 --> 00:57:55,200
Speaker 2: I brought him to the vet the next day because

1324
00:57:55,240 --> 00:57:58,720
Speaker 2: his runs were getting mad very quickly. My roommate kindly

1325
00:57:58,840 --> 00:58:01,680
Speaker 2: even left the mess of cooking the pizza all over

1326
00:58:01,720 --> 00:58:03,880
Speaker 2: the kitchen. But when I told him what the vet

1327
00:58:03,920 --> 00:58:07,680
Speaker 2: told me, he ate. My roommate's response was, that's crazy.

1328
00:58:07,680 --> 00:58:09,200
Speaker 2: I've been ordering takeout all week.

1329
00:58:09,400 --> 00:58:10,520
Speaker 1: You are a liar.

1330
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:13,200
Speaker 2: Buddy has told all of his friends and our mutual

1331
00:58:13,280 --> 00:58:18,080
Speaker 2: friends that he almost unlived my dog. After eight long moce,

1332
00:58:18,320 --> 00:58:22,640
Speaker 2: my dog and I are finally free. My dog and

1333
00:58:22,680 --> 00:58:24,720
Speaker 2: I need to stay at a friend's for two weeks,

1334
00:58:24,760 --> 00:58:27,520
Speaker 2: but after that, my three bedroom townhouse for just the

1335
00:58:27,520 --> 00:58:29,680
Speaker 2: two of us will be ready for us to move into.

1336
00:58:30,360 --> 00:58:33,120
Speaker 2: I cannot explain how happy I am to not only

1337
00:58:33,160 --> 00:58:36,360
Speaker 2: give my dog free rain again, but he will have

1338
00:58:36,400 --> 00:58:39,800
Speaker 2: free rain over two whole floors, with no one throwing

1339
00:58:39,800 --> 00:58:43,480
Speaker 2: a tantrum over some of the dumbest things, like not

1340
00:58:43,520 --> 00:58:45,480
Speaker 2: knowing how to split the rent in half with one

1341
00:58:45,480 --> 00:58:48,680
Speaker 2: person playing fifty dollars more a difference of twenty five

1342
00:58:48,760 --> 00:58:51,960
Speaker 2: dollars each because math is hard. He made three holes

1343
00:58:51,960 --> 00:58:54,240
Speaker 2: in the wall and left for a week because I

1344
00:58:54,320 --> 00:58:56,680
Speaker 2: was trying to explain how he was doing the math wrong.

1345
00:58:57,120 --> 00:59:00,000
Speaker 2: Even with the calculator to everyone still in my life

1346
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:03,880
Speaker 2: my old position, stop trying let them live in filth.

1347
00:59:04,360 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 2: Just clean your stuff and your room, nothing more, nothing less.

1348
00:59:07,680 --> 00:59:09,760
Speaker 4: The thing is, I can't do that, though, I just

1349
00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:11,320
Speaker 4: like I have a friend who also was in a

1350
00:59:11,360 --> 00:59:16,720
Speaker 4: situation like this where her roommates were disgusting, like disgusting,

1351
00:59:16,880 --> 00:59:19,800
Speaker 4: and she like stopped cleaning their stuff and would just

1352
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:22,040
Speaker 4: put literally all of her food. She got like a

1353
00:59:22,280 --> 00:59:26,400
Speaker 4: like a refrigerator stand, like put everything in her room,

1354
00:59:26,560 --> 00:59:28,200
Speaker 4: her dishes and stuff in her room.

1355
00:59:28,960 --> 00:59:31,520
Speaker 2: I'm assuming he just means until your leases up and

1356
00:59:31,560 --> 00:59:32,000
Speaker 2: you move out.

1357
00:59:32,000 --> 00:59:35,439
Speaker 4: Oh no, absolutely, I just like I physically cannot live

1358
00:59:35,960 --> 00:59:36,440
Speaker 4: like this.

1359
00:59:36,520 --> 00:59:38,880
Speaker 2: When people come over. It's obvious why the apartment is

1360
00:59:38,880 --> 00:59:41,000
Speaker 2: a mess when one roommates clean and the other is

1361
00:59:41,040 --> 00:59:45,000
Speaker 2: a disaster. Most importantly, move out. I currently sleep on

1362
00:59:45,000 --> 00:59:47,240
Speaker 2: a leather love seat with my dog by the way,

1363
00:59:47,400 --> 00:59:50,600
Speaker 2: because he must sleep with me. And honestly, it's worth

1364
00:59:50,640 --> 00:59:54,640
Speaker 2: it did never have to deal with that immature, dumb, inconsiderate, hypocritical,

1365
00:59:54,680 --> 00:59:59,000
Speaker 2: pathological liar anymore to think we were friends for sixteen years.

1366
00:59:59,480 --> 01:00:02,120
Speaker 2: It's just it's too bad that he's still the same scared,

1367
01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:04,280
Speaker 2: fourteen year old kid I used to stick up for

1368
01:00:04,480 --> 01:00:07,600
Speaker 2: when he was constantly getting bullied in school. PS. I

1369
01:00:07,640 --> 01:00:09,320
Speaker 2: know you saw my post and I know you see

1370
01:00:09,360 --> 01:00:09,920
Speaker 2: this one.

1371
01:00:09,920 --> 01:00:10,120
Speaker 4: F you.

1372
01:00:10,920 --> 01:00:13,520
Speaker 2: I have done nothing but try to help you, literally

1373
01:00:13,560 --> 01:00:16,760
Speaker 2: more than half of your life. I was your best

1374
01:00:16,760 --> 01:00:18,880
Speaker 2: friend because I told you what you needed to hear,

1375
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:22,320
Speaker 2: not what you wanted to hear. You told me that, Well,

1376
01:00:22,400 --> 01:00:24,160
Speaker 2: this is all I have to say to you now.

1377
01:00:24,440 --> 01:00:28,320
Speaker 2: You will never go anywhere in life. You constantly find

1378
01:00:28,320 --> 01:00:31,160
Speaker 2: excuses as to why something is not your fault, even

1379
01:00:31,200 --> 01:00:34,240
Speaker 2: when it doesn't make sense, like maintenance going around in

1380
01:00:34,360 --> 01:00:37,880
Speaker 2: unlocking apartments for no reason, or notice you totally didn't

1381
01:00:37,920 --> 01:00:40,760
Speaker 2: just leave the door unlocked like you always do. You

1382
01:00:40,920 --> 01:00:43,640
Speaker 2: need to grow up, even you know it. That's why

1383
01:00:43,680 --> 01:00:46,920
Speaker 2: you quit what three jobs because your bosses told you

1384
01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:50,320
Speaker 2: the same thing. You have terrible worth ethic. That's why

1385
01:00:50,360 --> 01:00:53,040
Speaker 2: you didn't get promoted, and I did, even though I

1386
01:00:53,120 --> 01:00:55,880
Speaker 2: refused it four times so that you could be considered.

1387
01:00:56,360 --> 01:00:58,520
Speaker 2: I even told you what you needed to do to

1388
01:00:58,640 --> 01:01:01,800
Speaker 2: get promoted, but you didn't listen to me. And what happened.

1389
01:01:02,320 --> 01:01:04,520
Speaker 2: I got told there was no chance you were getting it,

1390
01:01:04,600 --> 01:01:07,280
Speaker 2: and I was the only smart option. Look at me.

1391
01:01:07,800 --> 01:01:09,960
Speaker 2: I was promised two more times after that. In less

1392
01:01:10,000 --> 01:01:12,720
Speaker 2: than a year, you quit and are now working at

1393
01:01:12,760 --> 01:01:15,400
Speaker 2: a temp agency with no chance of growth because what

1394
01:01:15,560 --> 01:01:17,919
Speaker 2: your feelings got hurt that you aren't good enough new

1395
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:20,720
Speaker 2: is flash, idiot. No one is just born good enough

1396
01:01:20,760 --> 01:01:22,840
Speaker 2: for what they want to do. They work to get

1397
01:01:22,880 --> 01:01:25,520
Speaker 2: better until they are good enough. Hence why I went

1398
01:01:25,560 --> 01:01:27,880
Speaker 2: to college and got my degree because I wasn't good

1399
01:01:28,000 --> 01:01:30,440
Speaker 2: enough for the life that I wanted, but I became

1400
01:01:30,480 --> 01:01:33,640
Speaker 2: more than good enough. Maybe one day you'll stop digging

1401
01:01:33,640 --> 01:01:36,280
Speaker 2: this hole you're digging yourself into, but by that time

1402
01:01:36,320 --> 01:01:40,120
Speaker 2: it'll be too late. You're thirty. It's not goofy. It's

1403
01:01:40,240 --> 01:01:42,120
Speaker 2: just sad that it's the end of that story. And

1404
01:01:42,200 --> 01:01:44,520
Speaker 2: op you popped off at the end there. I'm not

1405
01:01:44,600 --> 01:01:46,720
Speaker 2: gonna comment on any of that. I think that we

1406
01:01:46,880 --> 01:01:48,240
Speaker 2: just missed a lot of context.

1407
01:01:48,640 --> 01:01:52,880
Speaker 4: I think so yeah, But glad you're out though, I'm

1408
01:01:52,920 --> 01:01:54,160
Speaker 4: so glad you're out in your

1409
01:01:54,200 --> 01:01:56,160
Speaker 2: Dog and that's the end of this story.