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Speaker 1: Do world, would you?

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Speaker 2: It's your mindsillion pieces.

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Speaker 1: Banana ba ba.

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Speaker 3: Ba banana guys, gals, not binary pals. Welcome to bananas.

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Speaker 3: I I'm Kurt. That's Scottie. You know this.

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Speaker 2: You're listening to a minisod. You're not even listening to

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Speaker 2: a regular episode. You're getting deep cut with the minisodes.

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Speaker 1: That's just when you get to know the real Banana boys.

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Speaker 1: None of that big broad money making stuff. It's just

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Speaker 1: the intimate. These are confessions. These are for our fans,

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Speaker 1: our people, and and also for the lazy people. They

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Speaker 1: get it six months later, sometime this fall. We're currently

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Speaker 1: recording it in Uh think it's July June. When yeah,

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Speaker 1: at June, there we go. It's hard to tell these days.

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Speaker 1: Oh what's up, dude. I'm up at Malibu, Malibu, Molly's

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Speaker 1: beachide bungalow, you know, and it's beautiful, it's sunny. I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna go walk in the ocean after this. I'm having

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Speaker 1: a nice day.

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Speaker 3: I we have recorded there twice.

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Speaker 2: I usually next time you're there, you gotta let me

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Speaker 2: know because I will come out.

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Speaker 1: This was I got the text and I drove out.

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Speaker 1: This was no planning. This was it's a nice day,

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Speaker 1: and I said, I'm on my way. I love it.

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Speaker 2: I love that. I was just driving on the highway

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Speaker 2: one hundred and four. As I was driving and then

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Speaker 2: my air conditioning just turned stopped work.

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Speaker 1: Oh man, I've had that. It's the worst.

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Speaker 3: Oh what a bad, bad feeling.

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Speaker 1: But doesn't it make you realize like our parents' generation,

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Speaker 1: like the Boomers, that had cars without air conditioning or

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Speaker 1: homes without air conditioning, and they just lit. I know,

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Speaker 1: climate changes made the world hotter, but cross country like that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but it probably wasn't one hundred and four in

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Speaker 2: LA in June thirty years ago.

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Speaker 1: True. Right, Well, stay draded, man, stay draded.

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Speaker 2: They draded. That's what we always say. That's gonna be

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Speaker 2: a new shirt. Stay draded.

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Speaker 1: These are your stories, your confessions. We comment, we tell

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Speaker 1: our stories. We just have a great time. This is

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Speaker 1: to get you through this is you get two episodes

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Speaker 1: on Tuesday sometimes and also you get one on Thursday

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Speaker 1: to get you through this is. Uh.

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Speaker 3: I was so happy about this.

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Speaker 2: Uh this message that we received, okay, messages from dober

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Speaker 2: Lady of Interval, which is like dober Lady of Intervale,

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Speaker 2: I don't know what that is like a Doberman? I think, oh,

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Speaker 2: oh yeah, got.

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Speaker 3: Dover Lady of interval Intervail.

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Speaker 2: I believe it's in the UK somewhere, maybe Twales, I

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Speaker 2: don't know.

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Speaker 3: Let's see love that Hi.

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Speaker 2: I was listening to the All Animals Miniso this morning

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Speaker 2: after fifteen hour shift. I'm an emergency veterinarian and I

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Speaker 2: had to write you guys because I have seen some

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Speaker 2: shit pun intended.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I bet, oh, okay.

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Speaker 2: You were correct in your guests that tons of people

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Speaker 2: have dogs who eat socks, underwear, etc. Which is like

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Speaker 2: a something we I remember what I remember this specific,

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Speaker 2: minis because we were talking about a dog who no

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Speaker 2: had eaten fifteen stuffed animals.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yeah, and they just kept.

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Speaker 2: Pulling stuffed addible after stuffed annimal out of the belly.

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Speaker 2: And then he came back like three months later and

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Speaker 2: he'd eaten like twelve of the same exact stuffed adedibles again,

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Speaker 2: so fun. Yes, so I guess we were talking about that,

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Speaker 2: she said, But I have to specifically add that I

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Speaker 2: know many veterinarians who have outed affairs because the underwear

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Speaker 2: they cut out of a dog did not belong to

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Speaker 2: the white.

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Speaker 1: Oh Wow, that's really crazy, is that.

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Speaker 2: I was just like, that's amazing, And of course she says,

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Speaker 2: this is a thing. I suspect that the underwear gets

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Speaker 2: left behind and the dog is like, this does not

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Speaker 2: smell right, and I must dispose of it, So down

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Speaker 2: hatchet goes.

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Speaker 1: Huh.

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Speaker 2: It's always a two year old labrador owned by a

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Speaker 2: couple with a few kids in middle school. I have

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Speaker 2: had to return foreign objects that I have removed from

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Speaker 2: dogs numerous times because the angry person who brought the

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Speaker 2: dog wants to know who in the family is to blame.

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Speaker 1: Well, see, that's interesting because I guess you you I

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Speaker 1: don't know if it's a legal thing, but like returning

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Speaker 1: those possessions. But it makes you think if you got

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Speaker 1: some riskue underwear out of a dog's belly, do you,

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Speaker 1: I guess you have to give it back. I would

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Speaker 1: give it back. Yeah, I mean, oof. That is a

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Speaker 1: crazy way to get busted.

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Speaker 3: Isn't that.

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Speaker 2: It is the most crazy way to get busted. You

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Speaker 2: have to put it in a script that has to

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Speaker 2: live somewhere.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's wild and yeah, and I've never heard that before.

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Speaker 1: That's right, it should go in a script. But it's

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Speaker 1: that is also yeah, is the dog being a bud?

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Speaker 1: Is the dog like being like, I'm hiding the evidence, boss,

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Speaker 1: I know you're up to no good.

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Speaker 3: I think it's more.

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Speaker 2: I think it's almost more like the dog being like

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Speaker 2: this doesn't belong.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, or like won't see her again, won't see him again,

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Speaker 1: might as well chow down. But also how brazen of

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Speaker 1: the person to just leave their underwear while they're having

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Speaker 1: an affair.

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Speaker 3: My god, that's the craziest part.

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Speaker 2: I remember I hooked up with I hooked up with

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Speaker 2: someone years ago, many many many years ago, and I

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Speaker 2: I couldn't find my shirt afterwards, so then I just

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Speaker 2: had to leave without my shirt and like zip my

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Speaker 2: jacket up and then continue to have an evening like

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Speaker 2: with no shirt, just my jacket zipped up to my neck.

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Speaker 2: And she said later she found it. It was like jammed

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Speaker 2: in between the headboard and the bed ye classic play,

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Speaker 2: And she was very nice to mail it to me.

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Speaker 1: That is very very nice. The night that I had

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Speaker 1: talked about this on the long time ago, the night

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Speaker 1: I woke up covered in flowers. I passed out at

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Speaker 1: a party and they covered me in silk flowers and

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Speaker 1: then they had moved a TV directly up to my

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Speaker 1: face with porn playing on it. So I woke up

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Speaker 1: like Midsummer I did. I definitely did. Somebody commented on

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Speaker 1: it once, but yeah, I was in Brooklyn and I

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Speaker 1: woke up on a futon and they somebody there must

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Speaker 1: have been in a costume design or something, but they

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Speaker 1: had taken like I don't know, one thousand colorful flowers

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Speaker 1: off of las or whatever and just buried me in them.

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Speaker 1: So when I woke up, I was just covered in

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Speaker 1: a rainbow with porn TV two inches from my face

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Speaker 1: with porn playing. And it was a place I had

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Speaker 1: never a loft that I didn't know anybody that lived there,

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Speaker 1: so I it was cold, and when I woke up

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Speaker 1: it was probably like three am, and I was like,

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Speaker 1: I better get out of here, and I'm looking for

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Speaker 1: my hoodie and I can't find a hoodie, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, this is gonna be the worst walk to

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Speaker 1: the subway, and it was a pretty long walk too,

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Speaker 1: and then I was like, I wonder if there's you know,

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Speaker 1: as parties, sometimes people take your jackets, throw them beds

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Speaker 1: or whatever. So I was like, well, I better go in,

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Speaker 1: and I go to the bedroom where I think it

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Speaker 1: might be, and I open the door slowly and I

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Speaker 1: hear deep snoring, like really like so on logs, and

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Speaker 1: I kind of like glance in and there's it's a

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Speaker 1: woman snoring and she's wearing my hoodie zipped up like

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Speaker 1: she had put it on because she was cold too.

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Speaker 1: So I was like it was like entering a dragon's layer.

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Speaker 1: And I like, I'm like looking around and I see

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Speaker 1: another hoodie on a chair, and I like walk over

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Speaker 1: to that hoodie and I like try it on, and

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Speaker 1: it's definitely small, but I think it's hers. I think

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Speaker 1: she probably got drunk and put on mine and I

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Speaker 1: zipped it up and it wasn't And then I left

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Speaker 1: in the night and smelled like you know, female perfumes

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Speaker 1: or shampoos or lotions or whatever. And I walked to

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Speaker 1: the subway and get on the L the G to

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Speaker 1: the f you know that old nightmare at three am,

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Speaker 1: still probably a little buzz snowy out and I realized

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Speaker 1: it was a woman's hoodie and it came up to

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Speaker 1: like my belly button, it was like midriff and it

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Speaker 1: was like black, and I was like, well, now I

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Speaker 1: just looked like the world's weirdest creep. That's like, just

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Speaker 1: woke up underflowers, staring at porn now wearing a woman's

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Speaker 1: women's apparel.

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Speaker 3: On the train at four in the morning.

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Speaker 1: I love those.

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Speaker 2: For some reason, I feel like you were at this party.

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Speaker 2: I was it a New Year's party.

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Speaker 1: I don't remember that.

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Speaker 2: I remember going to a New Year's party, and I

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Speaker 2: believe you and Anthony Batista were.

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Speaker 3: There, and it was like one whole wall.

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Speaker 2: Was like there was it was a big warehouse type thing,

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Speaker 2: and it was the people had built their own rooms,

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Speaker 2: you know, but like built them in that way that

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Speaker 2: like people who don't do construction in their twenties build

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Speaker 2: them right where it just looks like someone's built a

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Speaker 2: box up against the wall. Yes, yes, poorly, but the

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Speaker 2: front of it was actually pretty cool. Whoever's room that

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Speaker 2: was that faced the wall of windows had made the

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Speaker 2: wall of their room just all windows, but like old

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Speaker 2: windows they had found.

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Speaker 3: Do you ever remember going to a party with like

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Speaker 3: I look.

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Speaker 1: Like I actually remember that party specifically. It wasn't that night,

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Speaker 1: but I do remember that party.

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Speaker 2: Oh right, yes, look you were there. That was Yes,

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Speaker 2: that was a long long time ago.

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Speaker 1: But there was two thousand and five, two thousand and six, I.

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Speaker 3: Was wearing a party holster that party.

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Speaker 1: I think I remember that too, because I don't think

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Speaker 1: you and I were like good buddies. It's one of

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Speaker 1: those things like when you're in it's almost like being

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Speaker 1: new to high school or new to college dorm and

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Speaker 1: you like recognize people and you've had the conversation, but

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Speaker 1: you don't know if they remember you. But I do

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Speaker 1: remember that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Like it was like a It was like my

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Speaker 2: my girlfriend at the time I bought it for me,

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Speaker 2: was very fashioning. I know, I wore it that one

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Speaker 2: night and never wore it again because I could not

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Speaker 2: pull it off.

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Speaker 1: But it was.

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Speaker 2: Like like a holster, like like a cops like gun holster,

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Speaker 2: but instead of like guns, I just had like a

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Speaker 2: beer in one side, like my money in another side.

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Speaker 1: That's very funny to me.

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Speaker 3: That was very funny. All right.

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Speaker 2: So then there's a second part to this message. Oh

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Speaker 2: cool Part two. Honestly, by far my favorite is the

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Speaker 2: stuff that comes up when we have to induce vomiting

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Speaker 2: for a dog that has eaten a toxin or something,

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Speaker 2: which is a great way to.

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Speaker 3: Start a little paragraph.

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Speaker 2: I once induced vomiting, and a dog vomited like ten

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Speaker 2: used condoms and an entire bag's worth of fun size

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Speaker 2: hole enjoys. It was a Saturday night at Everyone who

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Speaker 2: walked by me in the ICU kept saying someone had

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Speaker 2: a good Saturday night. She said, it was a bit

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Speaker 2: rough to look that guy in the eye when I

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Speaker 2: went out to tell him that his dog was gonna

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Speaker 2: be fine.

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Speaker 1: That's pretty good.

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Speaker 2: Ten used condoms, an entire bag of fun side a

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Speaker 2: Dilmond Joyce rapper, Oh what a night? Just nobylin goblin

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Speaker 2: of Almondjoys in the rapper.

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Speaker 1: A Halloween orgy. I'm guessing gay men or or just

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Speaker 1: couples that are like, well, we've had sex for two minutes,

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Speaker 1: I would put on another condom. Oh, we've had sex

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Speaker 1: for two more minutes. But also, wouldn't you be more

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Speaker 1: worried about the Almond Joys because doesn't chocolate kill dogs?

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Speaker 1: So you're probably like, screw the condoms. We're fine with that.

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Speaker 1: It's the Almondjoys that I'm really stressing about. That's a

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Speaker 1: vet vet texts veterinarians. That just seems emergency vet centers

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Speaker 1: must have endless crazy stories. And I bet they never

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Speaker 1: work well as TV shows and movies because it's sad.

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Speaker 1: Nobody wants to see animal suffering. Well, no normal person,

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Speaker 1: so right, But yeah, talk about a crazy book. I'm

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Speaker 1: sure there's one out there, but I could read that

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Speaker 1: all night.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I mean, like all creatures, great and small man,

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Speaker 2: it's about a Welsh farm doctor.

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Speaker 1: Oh is that right. I've never read that. I read it.

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Speaker 1: I love that you that's what you pulled up. I've

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Speaker 1: heard that. I thought it was just something my mom

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Speaker 1: said about the Bible. I didn't know that was a

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Speaker 1: real thing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah it was. It's a series.

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Speaker 2: There's like four of them. I think I read all

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Speaker 2: of them when I was like twelve or something.

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Speaker 1: Colliterate young man, you were a big reader.

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Speaker 3: I love reading still. Do you know I haven't lost

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Speaker 3: it yet some days.

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Speaker 1: So do you think when your kids are in like

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Speaker 1: high school and college, you're going to get deeply back

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Speaker 1: into reading.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I'm already deeply back into reading. Because no, because

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Speaker 2: I've been trying. I've been like, uh, because I just

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Speaker 2: have a tendency to drink vod casodas and watch TV

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Speaker 2: and it's just not like it is incredibly pleasant way

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Speaker 2: to watch TV.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: But then I can just all of a sudden be like,

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Speaker 2: did I just have four vodka sodas watching TV? Like

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Speaker 2: I didn't go out, I didn't do anything. The next

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Speaker 2: day I wake up, I feel shitty. I get fast. Yes,

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Speaker 2: And so I've been just not drinking during the week

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Speaker 2: and uh and just reading. I read and instead, because

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Speaker 2: I just kind of like every time I sit down,

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Speaker 2: it's like I'm still trying to break the association of like,

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Speaker 2: watch TV, drink vodka sotas, so instead I like I

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Speaker 2: read instead, and then and then every once in a

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Speaker 2: while I'll like watch some TV, but usually it's because

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Speaker 2: I'm like tired.

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Speaker 3: Earlier I get.

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Speaker 1: Really affected, Like you, everybody thinks they don't get affected

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Speaker 1: by advertising or whatever, but I always noticed that when

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Speaker 1: I was watching shows or movies where they were drinking

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Speaker 1: a specific thing, I wanted to drink that thing. Like

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Speaker 1: when Madman was on a poor scotch or whiskey, I'd

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Speaker 1: be like, well, I guess I'm poor in a scotch

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Speaker 1: right now, or like even like Sex and the season

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Speaker 1: shows like that like Data Grow in Brooklyn, when that

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Speaker 1: would come on, I didn't have the stuff to make

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Speaker 1: a cosmo but I'd be like, well, I guess we're

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Speaker 1: drinking Martini's right now, Like, yeah, it's weird. I do

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Speaker 1: get affected when I'm watching things and people are drinking things.

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Speaker 1: I start to be like or like the Lebowski, like

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Speaker 1: I don't like a white Russian, but I'm kind of like, oh,

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Speaker 1: maybe a white Russian would be nice.

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Speaker 3: I remember watching for me.

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Speaker 1: It was.

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Speaker 2: The early seasons of Ray Donovan. I love me a

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Speaker 2: Ray Donovan.

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Speaker 1: Oh I watched season one? What did he drink? What

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Speaker 1: were they drinking?

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Speaker 3: No, no, no mccollans.

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Speaker 1: Oh sure, that's kind of yeah, mccowens a certain type

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Speaker 1: of Scott's drinker. That's not my kindness. Guy, you said

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Speaker 1: something about dating somebody that was sort of stylish, and

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Speaker 1: I hadn't thought about this until he said that. In

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Speaker 1: a long time. But in college I dated a girl

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Speaker 1: that was really cool, really nice woman. But she was

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Speaker 1: half Puerto Rican, half Dominican, you know, born in Massachusetts.

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Speaker 1: But she liked me, and right when we first started talking,

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Speaker 1: she was like, do you like merengue or vachata or whatever?

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Speaker 1: And I was like, sure, I don't name something I

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Speaker 1: don't know. She's like, it would be so fun for

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Speaker 1: you to come. There's this guy coming to campus and

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Speaker 1: he's like really big from Dominican Republic and his name's

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Speaker 1: Mala Fey and I go, okay. She's like he's huge,

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Speaker 1: and I was like okay, and she's like, do you

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Speaker 1: mind if I dress you up so you don't stand out?

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Speaker 1: And I was like I don't mind.

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Speaker 3: Oh, this is so wonderful.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I was a sophomore. I was. I was eighteen

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Speaker 1: years old. And so she went to H and M

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Speaker 1: in the West Springfield mall or wherever, and she bought

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Speaker 1: me a pink shirt with a pink silk tie. She said,

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Speaker 1: all of her friends and everybody going to this Maringue concert.

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Speaker 1: Basically the men were matching tie and shirt colors. She like,

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Speaker 1: decked me up. Yeah, And so I put it on

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Speaker 1: and I go and I am the only like full

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Speaker 1: white boy there. I'm the like absolutely, and so I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: here we go, and and somebody introduced it. It was

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Speaker 1: in a small It wasn't like in the mullet the

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Speaker 1: main arena. It was like a smaller theater. And then

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Speaker 1: it was four hundred Hasa cassa Latino or Hispanic students

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Speaker 1: dancing furiously to Mala Fay, whose biggest song is called Levaca,

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Speaker 1: which means the cow, and it's basically super quick music

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Speaker 1: to dance, too fast music that goes, lavaca move, Lavaca move,

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Speaker 1: And so I'm laughing at the fact that there's a

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Speaker 1: guy on stage mooing and saying Lavoka. She's like, don't laugh,

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Speaker 1: and she's like teaching me stuff and it was really fun.

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00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:05,520
Speaker 1: I fit it, but like everybody was dressed like she

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Speaker 1: way she was, but it was it was definitely like, look,

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00:16:08,320 --> 00:16:10,600
Speaker 1: I was brought into the situation like, look, I found one.

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00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:14,840
Speaker 1: He'll show up. And so I'm laughing at lavaca or whatever.

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00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:16,680
Speaker 1: And then the next song comes on and I think

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00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:20,040
Speaker 1: it was called like Ombre Divertito, like little Happy Boy

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00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:22,560
Speaker 1: or something, and that one's and then there's one about

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00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:25,200
Speaker 1: a dog that's like it barks, so they have a

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00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:29,280
Speaker 1: dog barking sound that's like and I'm like, is Merenge

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00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:32,600
Speaker 1: or bachata or whatever just the funniest music ever made

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Speaker 1: because all the words I understand seem insane. I remember

347
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Speaker 1: silk shirt, silk tie, very hard to dance in, very sweaty,

348
00:16:40,760 --> 00:16:43,720
Speaker 1: but yeah, I should try to. I should find that person.

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00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:49,320
Speaker 1: She was very fun, very fun. Yeah, Ombred Bertito. It

350
00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:53,080
Speaker 1: was like, here we go. You want me to do

351
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:57,280
Speaker 1: you know what? I have two left over confessions.

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00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:58,280
Speaker 3: Give them to me.

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00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:04,480
Speaker 1: This was the topic. Places I've hid stuff or one

354
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:08,200
Speaker 1: big secret. This one, this one made me happy. I'm

355
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:10,720
Speaker 1: glad we're not skipping over it. Yo bananas, which is

356
00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:13,879
Speaker 1: a funny way to start. Yo bananas, love the pod.

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00:17:14,480 --> 00:17:16,399
Speaker 1: I still don't know why I did this, but I

358
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:20,359
Speaker 1: hit a burger for my wife. I really wanted to

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00:17:20,359 --> 00:17:22,200
Speaker 1: eat it later, and I knew she'd be hungry after work,

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00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:24,639
Speaker 1: so I hit it in the back corner of the

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00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:27,320
Speaker 1: fridge around and put some other stuff around it, and

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00:17:27,359 --> 00:17:28,880
Speaker 1: then ate it in the middle of the night when

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00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:32,879
Speaker 1: she was asleep. But in my defense, it was so

364
00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:40,679
Speaker 1: fucking good. That's it. You're absolved. I mean, that's a

365
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:45,520
Speaker 1: great confession. I hope she's not a bananimal too, because

366
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Speaker 1: I bet she knows who this is. You probably have

367
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,880
Speaker 1: a real weird thing for burgers.

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Speaker 3: Oh, that's so funny.

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00:17:50,359 --> 00:17:53,920
Speaker 2: I have just I've been really appreciating you know. Every

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Speaker 2: once in a while.

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Speaker 3: Folks, I like to talk about my air fryer. I

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00:18:01,760 --> 00:18:05,000
Speaker 3: have been I've found it.

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00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:08,600
Speaker 2: It's if you get French fries, Sir, French fries and

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00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:10,760
Speaker 2: burgers like and if you get an extra burger and

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00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:12,439
Speaker 2: some extra French fries, you don't want to eat them

376
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:12,800
Speaker 2: right now.

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00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,720
Speaker 3: You put them in the fridge, they suck.

378
00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:16,840
Speaker 2: They always suck when you try and warm up in

379
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Speaker 2: the microwave, or you put them in an oven.

380
00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:21,520
Speaker 3: Especially fries, especially fries, and the air fryer.

381
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:25,520
Speaker 2: Man that those fries taste like they it's it's like

382
00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:28,520
Speaker 2: they are brand spanking.

383
00:18:28,080 --> 00:18:30,320
Speaker 1: New because I've never had them.

384
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:31,959
Speaker 2: Oh, you just throw them in the air fry for

385
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:34,560
Speaker 2: like two minutes and it's like brand new fries. Same

386
00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:38,879
Speaker 2: thing with a burger. It's the best anyway. Oh my god, Well,

387
00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:41,119
Speaker 2: we gotta got a sponsor. I haven't heard you speak

388
00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:44,359
Speaker 2: this passionately about things in a while. You have an

389
00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:49,120
Speaker 2: air sponsor passionately about my Brevel Smart Evan pro air.

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00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:53,879
Speaker 1: Fryer, Katie producer Katie Levine clock this let exactly right. No,

391
00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:58,359
Speaker 1: we need Brevel air fryers. We will do a pe.

392
00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:01,080
Speaker 1: We're gonna get really into it. Wally Fries on Air.

393
00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:06,119
Speaker 1: Oh hell yeah, here's the last last confession for THISA

394
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:08,960
Speaker 1: this I think falls under my one big secret, even

395
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:12,960
Speaker 1: though it could be places I've hit stuff. My one

396
00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:19,320
Speaker 1: big capital bag secret is that I've never paid taxes

397
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:22,680
Speaker 1: in my adult life, not once in twenty three years.

398
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:25,600
Speaker 1: I work off the books mainly, so it's not that

399
00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:28,160
Speaker 1: hard to do. But if the irs ever figured it out,

400
00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:30,640
Speaker 1: I am fucked six ways to Sunday.

401
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,120
Speaker 3: Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

402
00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:35,360
Speaker 1: Please forgive me. It does keep me up at night

403
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:40,120
Speaker 1: sometimes exclamation point. You are forgiven.

404
00:19:40,240 --> 00:19:43,400
Speaker 3: You are totally absolved and forgiven. But we don't care.

405
00:19:43,520 --> 00:19:46,720
Speaker 3: We don't care. I'm worried for you, though.

406
00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:47,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, we are concerned.

407
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:51,879
Speaker 2: That is something that like once you added up for

408
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:54,159
Speaker 2: that many years, is this a big number, buddy?

409
00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:58,200
Speaker 1: But also how long does the average person work their career?

410
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:01,119
Speaker 1: Thirty years, thirty five years? I don't know, maybe because

411
00:20:01,119 --> 00:20:04,520
Speaker 1: the way the world is forty years now, Like this

412
00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:08,200
Speaker 1: person is twenty three years into whatever their career is.

413
00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:10,560
Speaker 1: It's like they're they're probably not gonna get they're not

414
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:14,800
Speaker 1: gonna get Social Security. It never contributed exactly, but depending

415
00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:16,800
Speaker 1: what their job is, if you can do it until

416
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,880
Speaker 1: old age, they might skate by.

417
00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:22,600
Speaker 3: Do you is that? I don't know if you do.

418
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,720
Speaker 2: I think if once you would like the thirty year mark,

419
00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:26,719
Speaker 2: they're they're gonna come for you.

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00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:30,560
Speaker 1: I get. I mean, well, I guess so I don't

421
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:32,679
Speaker 1: know either. I'm sure we have a tax lawyer that

422
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:34,840
Speaker 1: is a bananimal that will either listen to this next

423
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:35,840
Speaker 1: Thursday or in.

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00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:37,919
Speaker 3: Six six months, and we'll get a lot of responses.

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00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:42,640
Speaker 1: Leave us. You know a paragraph three sentences. Is there

426
00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:45,080
Speaker 1: a way out if you've never paid taxes in twenty

427
00:20:45,080 --> 00:20:48,000
Speaker 1: three years? Is this person royally screwed? I'll give an

428
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,600
Speaker 1: update on a future episode. I mean, we forgive you

429
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:52,680
Speaker 1: the Banana boys.

430
00:20:52,880 --> 00:20:55,719
Speaker 3: You're a zomb as far as years, as far as

431
00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:56,480
Speaker 3: we're concerned.

432
00:20:56,960 --> 00:21:00,280
Speaker 1: But uh wow, I was like, that is I get

433
00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:02,280
Speaker 1: it. It must be my one big secret. Yeah, oh yeah,

434
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:05,719
Speaker 1: I would be terrified if you But also if your

435
00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:08,359
Speaker 1: name's not on a lease, I don't know. There it

436
00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:09,480
Speaker 1: might have to you.

437
00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:12,399
Speaker 2: Have to live pretty below under the radar, like you

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00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:14,200
Speaker 2: have to live out in the woods like my buddy

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Speaker 2: Steve Lee.

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00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:18,400
Speaker 1: Right or in a major city and just slipped through

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00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,600
Speaker 1: the cracks. I feel like I feel like in New

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00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:22,639
Speaker 1: York City, I know a lot of artists are people

443
00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:24,600
Speaker 1: that were like, I'm a carpenter, I'm a painter or

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00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:27,359
Speaker 1: whatever who probably never paid taxes.

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00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:30,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, Steve Leane never did. And then he

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00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 2: got on he got on Medicaid when he got sick.

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00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,959
Speaker 2: I think he was on Social Security and Medicaid and

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00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,480
Speaker 2: he don't think he ever paid taxes.

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00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:38,440
Speaker 1: He lived crarazy.

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00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:42,440
Speaker 2: He lived in the woods, no running water, no electricity,

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00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:44,520
Speaker 2: had no bills in his name or anything like that.

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00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:48,280
Speaker 1: So one time, you know, Scotty is not the most

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00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:50,600
Speaker 1: unique name, but there's not a ton of Scotty's flying around.

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00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:54,600
Speaker 1: But I got an email once from a entertainment manager. Yeah,

455
00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:59,560
Speaker 1: and he his accountant's name or finance financial guy's name

456
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:03,040
Speaker 1: was Scott and he once sent me his entire finances

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00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:06,200
Speaker 1: and retirement portfolio amazing. And I opened it up because

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00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:08,960
Speaker 1: you know, it was like, you know whatever, twenty sixteen,

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00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:10,639
Speaker 1: blah blah blah. And I open it up and I

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00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:12,840
Speaker 1: start scrolling, and I was like, oh, this isn't for me.

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00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:16,320
Speaker 1: But I totally saw all the Social Security dumbers, how

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00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:18,119
Speaker 1: much money has in the bank, how much he is

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00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:20,879
Speaker 1: like saving, what his kids are getting. That's crazy, And

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00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:23,200
Speaker 1: and I emailed him. I was like I deleted it.

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00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:26,200
Speaker 1: I just want to let you know. He's like, oh sorry, man, yeah,

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00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:28,159
Speaker 1: thanks so much, and I was just like, dude, you

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00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:31,120
Speaker 1: just like, yeah, that is one of the things. Double

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00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:32,880
Speaker 1: check that email, Yeah, double check.

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00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:35,600
Speaker 3: And use a secure server to upload shit like that.

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00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:36,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know.

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00:22:37,240 --> 00:22:39,159
Speaker 3: That's what we want to leave you with. Use a

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00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 3: secure server to upload.

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00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:46,520
Speaker 2: Financial documents, folks. You gotta get an air for you,

474
00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:50,360
Speaker 2: gotta use a secure server when you're uploading financial documents.

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00:22:50,640 --> 00:22:54,160
Speaker 1: This must be the most informative episode of Bananas we've

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00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:56,600
Speaker 1: ever done. We've learned, we've loved.

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00:22:57,119 --> 00:22:59,640
Speaker 3: And we'll see you next time here on a Tuesday

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00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:00,679
Speaker 3: mini folks.

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00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:14,719
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Thank you so much. Bananas. Bananas

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00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:16,640
Speaker 1: is an exactly right media production.

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00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:19,040
Speaker 3: Our producer and engineer is Katie Levine.

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00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:22,640
Speaker 1: The catchy Bananas theme song was composed and performed by Kahan.

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00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:26,200
Speaker 2: Artwork for Bananas was designed by Travis Millard.

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00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:29,040
Speaker 1: And our benevolent overlords are the great Karen Kilgareff and

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00:23:29,080 --> 00:23:29,960
Speaker 1: Georgia Hartstart

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00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:34,440
Speaker 2: And Lisa Maggott is our full human, not a robot intern.