Speaker 1: Hey guys, this is executive producer Anna and I am
Speaker 1: here to present the third favorite episode of this year
Speaker 1: that me and producer Becca chose as our fave, and
Speaker 1: that is the cole Ist Schola episode. So we love
Speaker 1: this episode and wanted to re release it for you
Speaker 1: guys to listen to because Cole had such a great
Speaker 1: year with O Mary and we're just such huge fans
Speaker 1: of theirs, So we really hope you guys enjoy listening to.
Speaker 2: This podcast again.
Speaker 1: And yeah, we cannot wait for this new year to
Speaker 1: bring you, guys all new guests and wonderful episodes of
Speaker 1: Lost Culturistas. And new episodes start releasing next week on Wednesday,
Speaker 1: so stay tuned for that and enjoy this episode of
Speaker 1: Cola Scola on Lost Culturistas. Thanks, Happy holidays.
Speaker 2: Look, may oh, I see you my mind. Look over
Speaker 2: there is that culture. Yes, goodness, wow, lost Culture digs calling.
Speaker 2: I just gave parents to the camera. It was involuntary.
Speaker 2: Well we do praise God. Praise God. By the way,
Speaker 2: just so everyone knows moving forward, this is officially a
Speaker 2: Christian judaeo Christian podcast. M M. If you have anything
Speaker 2: to say negative about the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ
Speaker 2: old or Missy Missy, Yeah, you had a really tragic
Speaker 2: energy coming in. Not tragic energy, but you were a
Speaker 2: little ornery. You know what. I actually, as I was
Speaker 2: walking here today, I was like, am I gonna show
Speaker 2: up as my bitchy self today? Or I gonna am
Speaker 2: I gonna put up a front? No, but I'm choosing
Speaker 2: to be authentic today and say I'm in a bitchy
Speaker 2: mood because of two things. And you know when two
Speaker 2: things go wrong and then everything else is the third thing?
Speaker 3: We know for the domino effect to happen, Now, go on,
Speaker 3: dominoes have to fall, uh huh. Or one has to fall,
Speaker 3: one has to knock into the second. That's actually really
Speaker 3: culture number eight. For the to fall, one has to
Speaker 3: fall into the second. Not so tell us what happened?
Speaker 2: Well, the first thing was today I was coming back
Speaker 2: into New York City. Well, by the way, thank you
Speaker 2: so much from Long Island, New York. Because it was,
Speaker 2: of course the day of Mother's Mother's Day. I spent
Speaker 2: the day with Katrina and Co. And I came back
Speaker 2: in today and was going to open my AirPods. Classic comedy.
Speaker 2: They fell out onto the train tracks and would you
Speaker 2: believe there actually was a moment where I was like,
Speaker 2: can I go on the train tracks and get my
Speaker 2: air pods? And I said, can you imagine that type
Speaker 2: of death for me? Third rail? And then you were
Speaker 2: going to get railed tonight? Okay. So then the second
Speaker 2: thing was I get a text like, immediately after the
Speaker 2: air pods are gone, I did not hop on the
Speaker 2: track that says my Dick appointments that I had to cancel.
Speaker 2: And I wanted to discuss the reason that he gave.
Speaker 2: We don't know the reason. It were about to get
Speaker 2: the big no, and I said, the snake is eating
Speaker 2: its own tail in the gay community when it comes
Speaker 2: to reasons for canceling on Dick appointments. Heard them all,
Speaker 2: this is when I've used having an emergency with his
Speaker 2: closest friend. I said, you know what, just say that
Speaker 2: your friend needs you. When you said closest friend, that's
Speaker 2: what that was the tell. I'm having an emergency with
Speaker 2: my closest friend and they really need me. Dot dot
Speaker 2: dot really wanted to hang out, wondering about later or
Speaker 2: maybe when you get back to New York. This is fine,
Speaker 2: this is not a big deal. I'm just saying I've
Speaker 2: used that excuse. I'm not sure what the better excuse
Speaker 2: would be. Excuse.
Speaker 4: Those are two severe words that are used in proximity
Speaker 4: to each other.
Speaker 2: That is suspicious, emergency, closest emergency, and closest friend. Like,
Speaker 2: it's not just something came up. An emergency came up.
Speaker 2: Now it's just a friend. No, the closest friend. So
Speaker 2: what I'm saying is we need to come up with
Speaker 2: a new especially, we need new excuses, and I would
Speaker 2: love to brainstorm today. Yeah, with our noted queer guests,
Speaker 2: one of the biggest queers. That's going to be really
Speaker 2: fun to be to them. Definitely, But I think that
Speaker 2: I really needed the dick after the AirPods went away.
Speaker 2: I was already excited about it. You know who wants
Speaker 2: to fuck you? My dad. We can't talk about it. No, actually,
Speaker 2: don't tell me what I can't talk about. I'm in
Speaker 2: a bad one.
Speaker 3: It is comfortable with you talking about your father being
Speaker 3: attracted to me.
Speaker 2: So Bowen has been sort of hitting the gym, and
Speaker 2: you better get comfortable with lost Coach becoming the poster
Speaker 2: children for sex because we're working so hard in the gym.
Speaker 2: I went to Berry's today. But this isn't about me.
Speaker 2: This is about bo My dad said, when you did
Speaker 2: the Mother's Day bit with your mom, who was perfect,
Speaker 2: very very sweet, my dad goes, Bowen looks fucking great,
Speaker 2: and he's saying fuck more than ever. Boone looks fucking great.
Speaker 2: It looks been in the fucking gym, fucking looking toned,
Speaker 2: big arms. You don't have to know anything. Okay, don't
Speaker 2: piss me off. Go ahead, calm yourself down. You're out
Speaker 2: of control. This is just is this what they call transferends.
Speaker 2: I'm getting what that means, what I'm getting on He
Speaker 2: rubs himself. I'm getting transferends. This is a despicious day,
Speaker 2: auspicious day.
Speaker 3: We have our guests joining us, backed by popular demand.
Speaker 2: Literally they beg, they beg us to do.
Speaker 3: They beg and pleating it wasn't the right time, and
Speaker 3: this is the right time, because guess what, it's day
Speaker 3: one of their much deserved time off before previews begin
Speaker 3: for Oh Mary on broad Way.
Speaker 2: You get bigger than Broadway. You don't know Broadway. There's
Speaker 2: no way up, there's not any bigger stage. A lot
Speaker 2: of people have been asking, do you I swear to God.
Speaker 2: This is This is a conversation I have constantly with
Speaker 2: people in the community. How do you think they'll make
Speaker 2: it bigger and better? I don't think they have to.
Speaker 2: See that's every individual than bigger and better. Shut up,
Speaker 2: I said, it's shutter. It's all already big and good.
Speaker 2: It's already big and better, bigger and better. Look, I'm
Speaker 2: so happy that you have I see now I'm pissed off.
Speaker 2: We're so angry. What do you what else do you want?
Speaker 2: It is?
Speaker 3: I'm sorry and I and I said this. I had
Speaker 3: the privilege of going opening night at the Lucial Hotel.
Speaker 3: I walked out of that saying, that is the funniest
Speaker 3: comedy play ever written, ever produced, ever performed.
Speaker 2: Why do we want more? Stop it? Let me sell
Speaker 2: you something.
Speaker 4: Certainly stop it with that that colonial attitude.
Speaker 2: Certainly the best thing that's been at the Lucille Hortel.
Speaker 2: Say hey, all right, let's not the best thing. Let's
Speaker 2: be at the luci everything before it. What about the Lyceum?
Speaker 2: I see them more like I see them all. I
Speaker 2: see them all flop at the Lyceum. I see every
Speaker 2: There's been no good theater. There's been There's been nothing
Speaker 2: salt until now. And we were all talking about that. Actually,
Speaker 2: right before we got on Mike, we were all saying
Speaker 2: how they decade. Well, Colon came in and they said,
Speaker 2: thank god I decided to do the show. Not since
Speaker 2: what show? Has there not been good made? There's been
Speaker 2: anything good on stage since name and Sarah Justica Parker agrees.
Speaker 4: Agrees June twenty sixth, previous begin twelve weeks. I see him.
Speaker 2: Only give this person a fucking break. Please give Conrad
Speaker 2: Rickamore a goddamn brain. No, I say, continue to work them. Yeah,
Speaker 2: he needs to stay busy. Keep the voices at Bay.
Speaker 2: Crazy people every want to make James scovery one in
Speaker 2: the show is insane thing, and the people backstage are
Speaker 2: even crazier. Hannah solo solo, fucking god, Hannah and Peter squawking,
Speaker 2: oh my god, selling their little bobbles, selling their bobbles backstage,
Speaker 2: trying the best they can to get on stage. Good luck.
Speaker 2: I say, this one's never getting sick.
Speaker 3: Have fun with the little marbles and spilling them all
Speaker 3: over the floor. This one is never going to trip.
Speaker 2: This one's never getting sick, and you're going to see
Speaker 2: the Bloomers spoiling the show. Yeah, I'm spoiling the show.
Speaker 2: Well here's a spoiler. It's incredible, and so is our guests.
Speaker 2: And when I say they beg I mean the audience begs.
Speaker 2: The audience literally begs us to have callback because they
Speaker 2: don't like our other episode. They get they get furious.
Speaker 2: It's okay, what can you do in our polarizing flop era?
Speaker 2: And it ends today with our guests the One and
Speaker 2: Only God. Don't talk when we're talking. Don't talk when
Speaker 2: we're talking. That was rude. You don't you have enough stage?
Speaker 2: You are trying to get me ruined?
Speaker 4: Yeah, how so I never said I never said that
Speaker 4: there's never been any good theater.
Speaker 2: Do they gonna believe you know me? Or you well, you're.
Speaker 4: Gonna get me in trouble because I'm part of the community.
Speaker 4: Now that's I love every show that's ever been written,
Speaker 4: that's ever been performed.
Speaker 2: What are the top three shows?
Speaker 4: Top three shows of all time? Yeah, oh Mary, we're
Speaker 4: no our town, our town, Thornton, My town Thornton and
Speaker 4: the town. Oh I love Blake Lively. Was so Blake
Speaker 4: Lively come back to Broadway?
Speaker 2: Blake I would like to see that.
Speaker 4: My god, absolutely, Arianna come back to Broadway.
Speaker 3: So Cole would do this bit in the day where
Speaker 3: they pretend to be like, how about you tell it,
Speaker 3: I butcher this, I just it's a character that's like
Speaker 3: all my other characters.
Speaker 2: It's just crazy woman, crazy, crazy woman.
Speaker 4: All she cares about is getting Ariana Grande back on Broadway.
Speaker 2: So you're in the right place, You're in the right
Speaker 2: rect line. Well, no, Arianna, this this is all set
Speaker 2: up to say.
Speaker 4: First day on set of Wicked, m my friend Colo,
Speaker 4: there's this bit where they pretend to be this old woman,
Speaker 4: this theater going woman who all she wants, she goes
Speaker 4: to every show, but all she wants Arianna come back
Speaker 4: to broad We missed your sweetheart. Get on this side
Speaker 4: of the footlights again. I see you at the shows.
Speaker 2: Jesus, do something besides geez, Come on, j R. B
Speaker 2: Come on. You said that before coming on the My too, jr.
Speaker 2: Is all the same.
Speaker 4: No, No, you are getting show.
Speaker 2: Can you imagine what you just did? I have in
Speaker 2: my mouth. I was I was getting mucus up. Oh
Speaker 2: my god, we need to start this over. Let's start this.
Speaker 2: We need to start this over.
Speaker 4: I think the listeners need to know that I've been
Speaker 4: doing eight shows a week for a long time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, now, explain is tired? Yeah?
Speaker 4: Now, what's the pre show ritual? Grether's past, Steeles, Adam Mizer?
Speaker 2: What do you do? I do? I vocal steam.
Speaker 4: I meet with Tony Russian Rob.
Speaker 2: God, he's good. God, he's good. People forget, forget people forget.
Speaker 5: How good he is.
Speaker 2: Community.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, for sure, But I don't want to forget
Speaker 4: about the dick appointment excuses.
Speaker 2: What's what's your sort of whole read on that situation?
Speaker 4: You know what I think? Just saying I need to reschedule. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I need to reschedule because it's so anxiety inducing because
Speaker 4: then you have to be like, oh no, I hope
Speaker 4: your friend's okay, and then you're an asshole.
Speaker 2: If now I'm worried.
Speaker 4: About this friend, close closest friend, what kind of emergency?
Speaker 2: It is not for nothing, but if it's a real emergency,
Speaker 2: we might not be able to reschedule. You're going to
Speaker 2: be grieving. Yeah, you with your closest friend. How do
Speaker 2: you know Thursday is going to work? You don't know
Speaker 2: that with your closest and emergency with your closest friend.
Speaker 4: You know anything, You can't plan out anything, text them tomorrow.
Speaker 2: How's your friend doing? Well? I think I might you
Speaker 2: know what, how's your friend doing? It's like it was
Speaker 2: the kind of thing where it was like it went
Speaker 2: a little bit beyond like disappointment because of how far
Speaker 2: it went in the in the sexting, and even there
Speaker 2: even was some verbal there were some voice messages sent
Speaker 2: back and forth. Do y'all do that gay culture is
Speaker 2: gay courting.
Speaker 3: Gay courtship is over promising, under delivering, constantly over promising,
Speaker 3: under delivering.
Speaker 4: Don't you think my mind went to the Olympics. My
Speaker 4: mind went to carry Strouss.
Speaker 2: Around the corner. You're going, you're going.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll be there because I have to promote the show.
Speaker 2: Right in July, Yeah, twelve weeks. When when does that end?
Speaker 4: I can't help help us six seven carry the one,
Speaker 4: carry the one.
Speaker 2: When you came up in the same community, we came
Speaker 2: up in the We both came up in the community.
Speaker 2: Carry the one at the same time. I don't know anymore.
Speaker 4: In Paris, I'll be in Paris for the Olympics promoting
Speaker 4: Oh Mary.
Speaker 2: Yeah, do you think they know who she is? Being
Speaker 2: that she's I'm reading in my notes a former First
Speaker 2: Lady of the United States.
Speaker 4: Well, you know, I think a lot of people forget. Yeah,
Speaker 4: well people forget?
Speaker 3: Can I can I be honest and say you were
Speaker 3: on Seth it was perfect Seth Myers, who a friend
Speaker 3: of the community. Yeah, and little too friendly. I think,
Speaker 3: total gig guy. He's arriving at that. Let him cook,
Speaker 3: let him, let him come out, let him cook, let
Speaker 3: him come Let terms Right, So you said on his
Speaker 3: show that you did almost no research because and I
Speaker 3: think this is so smart, because you would have written
Speaker 3: jokes that were like, well, that's going to get a
Speaker 3: laugh because.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well I got a lot of people it's been annoying,
Speaker 4: no know, like just two people being like, oh, this
Speaker 4: person does no research and now they get to play
Speaker 4: on Broadway.
Speaker 2: Yes.
Speaker 4: Actually, wow, you don't understand to understand decades of work
Speaker 4: that went into this play. Yes, and this has been yeah,
Speaker 4: fifteen years, fifteen, eighteen, nineteen.
Speaker 2: Oh God, carry the one, please car someone else carry
Speaker 2: the one? Yeah, the one? Someone else carry it? Carry
Speaker 2: at their point? Are you at home? So why do
Speaker 2: you think she was so crazy? Mary? Yeah? What do
Speaker 2: you think it was? I have no idea.
Speaker 4: She was a s circle that woman she was. She
Speaker 4: was kind of silly. Yeah, she's just a silly little girl, right.
Speaker 4: She liked to have fun with her friends shopping and yeah,
Speaker 4: you know, an aide kind of tied her down. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Oh that's my worst nightmare if I were a cabaret singer.
Speaker 4: So the character of Mary, and I think Mary was
Speaker 4: a cabaret star. Yes, yeah, it doesn't work out married
Speaker 4: this guy he's president, and then you're like, I would
Speaker 4: go crazy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it is among us.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've talked a lot to Michelle about this Obama. Yeah,
Speaker 4: you know, because she really wanted to sing. Really, she's
Speaker 4: really been wanting to sing. What stopped her bad voice?
Speaker 2: You know? They released a picture of Michelle Obama the
Speaker 2: other day. She was really high, high. She was having fun,
Speaker 2: like a resort or something. Well, I look, and they're
Speaker 2: going to get me in trouble with more than one
Speaker 2: community tonight. Okay, the DC community. We're gonna be able
Speaker 2: to go down and do it at the Lincoln then bye, bye,
Speaker 2: bye gone. Thanks a lot of reactions to the Tony
Speaker 2: Nams this year, there's too many.
Speaker 4: I actually should be one award, Yeah for the whole show,
Speaker 4: for the whole show with how many nominations, just.
Speaker 2: Like two you should be down to like two people.
Speaker 2: Oh that's good. I love. It's even more heartbreaking.
Speaker 4: It should be Hillary versus Trump. Yeah, and god yeah.
Speaker 4: And Trump would be a better actor, wouldn't he. I
Speaker 4: mean Hillary depends on the show, right.
Speaker 2: You're actually right?
Speaker 3: Well, helly, we can produce stuff. Trump could produce stuff,
Speaker 3: but Hillary couldn't. Do you know, like Angels in America,
Speaker 3: whereas Trump could. Trump will be an amazing, amazing I
Speaker 3: mean he knew him him, that's his mentor. I think
Speaker 3: he'd be a good what's his name? Prior Trump? Prior
Speaker 3: Trump dazzles as pride.
Speaker 2: Can you see it? I can see it because better
Speaker 2: Prior dazzles the word Trump over angels.
Speaker 4: That's where we're going. Yeah, I mean that's what's gonna happen.
Speaker 4: Make Angels in America great again?
Speaker 2: Wow? Oh my title of that, Make Angels in America
Speaker 2: great again?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Trump, where dazzles has prior, Trump dazzles has prior. You
Speaker 2: have to say it in that voice.
Speaker 3: Now we're in hot water with the Kushner community, okay,
Speaker 3: and the Mike Nichols community.
Speaker 2: That's okay. No, they would love it. Hey, Hey, their
Speaker 2: checks are clearing. Yeah, absolutely true. Which you don't want
Speaker 2: to put butts in season? Put Trump on Broadway where
Speaker 2: all scared to say it? Put Trump on Broadway. If
Speaker 2: you want to say around the boards, I'm saying, I'm saying,
Speaker 2: why are we so afraid of talent? What it? Yeah?
Speaker 4: I think America is too afraid I know of Yeah,
Speaker 4: that's why we're in this That's why we're in this mess.
Speaker 2: If we just put him on Broadway, this is honestly
Speaker 2: not not an answer.
Speaker 4: If I were to go to him right now, yeah
Speaker 4: and say, yeah, look if you drop about my twelve weeks,
Speaker 4: oh Mary, would you do that? No, not at all.
Speaker 4: I don't care who it would say.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that's really noble.
Speaker 4: This is my time, it's my year.
Speaker 2: Of course, it is. Thank you. I don't want you
Speaker 2: to give up. Thank you. I do think we could
Speaker 2: recast some of your castmates, a let's get them out
Speaker 2: of there, put Trump and put Trump in Yeah, sorry Scully, Yeah,
Speaker 2: Trump would be a great Mary's teacher. Yeah, because honestly,
Speaker 2: Trump would get the same reaction as James when he
Speaker 2: walks out. Just walks out in the audience and goes,
Speaker 2: oh fuck yeah, and then sorry, can we cuss? I forget? No,
Speaker 2: this is Judeo Christian, but that is something the whole
Speaker 2: religion is like, it's fake.
Speaker 4: How did you find that out?
Speaker 2: It's about control? Okay? Anyway, as I put my coffee
Speaker 2: all over myself.
Speaker 3: You know, I went to the museum the other day.
Speaker 3: I brought my mom to the Brooklyn Museum.
Speaker 2: Lovely.
Speaker 4: Ratulations by the way, thank you. You've been meaning to
Speaker 4: get there for years. I learned something hard together.
Speaker 3: Most most empires last three four hundred years. Yeah, we're due,
Speaker 3: We're done.
Speaker 4: I think we think so. You know what what podcast
Speaker 4: I love? Yes, are the Kelsey brothers. The Kelsey brothers
Speaker 4: who are the Kelsey brothers, Travis and tramas his brother,
Speaker 4: and they have a podcast and they're actually very charming
Speaker 4: on No, they're great.
Speaker 2: They actually they actually oh wait, that's how I first heard.
Speaker 4: I don't think so, honey, because they started, they started,
Speaker 4: they started, and then you guys kind of the first.
Speaker 2: Time gay people have taken from straight straight. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 4: This podcast calls fall of Civilization. Oh and every episode
Speaker 4: is wake Up, Wake Up. Every episode is a New
Speaker 4: civiliz like you wanted them on.
Speaker 2: Now they're here and they're talking about the fall civilization
Speaker 2: and yeah they're being a didact Roman Britain.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the fallow Roman Britain, the Bronze Age collapse.
Speaker 3: As in like when Britain was Roman. Yes, yes, and
Speaker 3: like how that fell apart.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, you know. It's fascinating.
Speaker 4: It's really interesting stuff. And I think I think people
Speaker 4: don't realize.
Speaker 2: Like, but here's the thing about history.
Speaker 3: I get annoyed when people are like, we're doomed to
Speaker 3: repeat the mistakes, and like, I think we're doomed no
Speaker 3: matter what, even if we do know the history.
Speaker 2: That's just how not me. No, no, congrat thank you.
Speaker 2: Can I tell this story? Col You can.
Speaker 4: Tell it, but you better be careful. I don't know
Speaker 4: what story you're talking about.
Speaker 3: I basically had a little mental breakdown over the summer.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, that was hilarious. We were all laughing
Speaker 4: about it.
Speaker 3: I remember was screaming on fire, on fire, I go
Speaker 3: to Amsterdam. You were in against at the time, you
Speaker 3: were Agains at the time. I was supposed to my
Speaker 3: close friends going to be an Amsterdam. You said maybe
Speaker 3: I'll come see you yeah.
Speaker 2: I said, I.
Speaker 3: Will pay for a hotel room if you come and
Speaker 3: hang out with me. And you were so kind to
Speaker 3: do that kind.
Speaker 2: I was in Ghent. Everyone's yeah you can.
Speaker 3: And then we had a lovely day together and we
Speaker 3: were in the park. Yeah was it you or me?
Speaker 3: We were just like, we should go see a play tonight.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I can't remember. I can't God, I can't remember
Speaker 4: who it was. And you guys, we're like, let's go
Speaker 4: see lay Miss.
Speaker 3: And then we looked up tickets for that night, bought
Speaker 3: two tickets to lay Miss, sat in the mezzanine.
Speaker 2: All in Dutch, in Dutch and the eliest.
Speaker 3: Not bad, bad language, bad, young and hilarious songs in Dutch.
Speaker 2: No, that's generous. Thank you. Did any song survive the language?
Speaker 2: I mean, one day More was pretty cool.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it course those harmony, the harmony.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's good. That was great. That was really good.
Speaker 2: That was too good. John right here, Trump look out,
Speaker 2: I'm coming for you. Hey, Donald Trump, I'm coming for you. Baby.
Speaker 4: It was a lovely time. It was one of the
Speaker 4: worst days of my life, well for me, it was.
Speaker 2: It was, it was.
Speaker 4: It was incredible. Thank you for being there watching lames
Speaker 4: in Dutch. It was going to the opera, you know exactly.
Speaker 2: Now, did y'all sort of do a post mortem after?
Speaker 2: What do you mean?
Speaker 4: We just couldn't. We were so moved. Were just all
Speaker 4: we could do is walk?
Speaker 2: Just a beautiful city for that type of thing. Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: be careful, lightly, tread much lighter. Sorry, I'm just feeling
Speaker 2: reeling from from this, from the subway, from the AirPods,
Speaker 2: the there's gonna be no dick in my butt tonight.
Speaker 2: I think there's still time. There's still time. I did
Speaker 2: think about getting like on the apps, and you'm like.
Speaker 4: Who, Yeah, no, Samantha Who, Christina Apple, Christina Applegate, who
Speaker 4: I share a birthday with? So please please be careful,
Speaker 4: Please be careful. That must be world, Please be careful.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, me, Joe DiMaggio, Christina Applegate. That's pretty good.
Speaker 2: That's really that's a really good trade. Yeah, day over,
Speaker 2: day over. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Now, what are the hopes and dreams for this time
Speaker 3: off you have before the previews start?
Speaker 2: I want to get back to me. Yeah, I believed that.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry you, thank you. Don't don't let this change. Well,
Speaker 2: I think what's happening is what don't let this success
Speaker 2: change you. I think that one thing that everyone's been
Speaker 2: talking about in the group thread that you're not in
Speaker 2: is that you've changed you and you've become a big
Speaker 2: big Yeah. Sorry, you went to the met gala. That
Speaker 2: actually happened. And if you think I'm not going to
Speaker 2: ask about it and who you sat next to, you didn't?
Speaker 2: You didn't.
Speaker 3: I don't think correct. You're just going.
Speaker 2: To step on that water. Well, I'm not going to
Speaker 2: forget the question, and you're going to run out of
Speaker 2: water at some point. At some point you're going to
Speaker 2: have to come up for air boom, oh not that,
Speaker 2: and you asked for them to come back. Can we please? No,
Speaker 2: we don't have to talk about it. No, I was
Speaker 2: going to stay you. Look.
Speaker 4: Can we talk about the abuse Maria Carey precious?
Speaker 2: Oh you batched every infection? Yeah? Can we talk about
Speaker 2: in your household? I'm talking about what did you say?
Speaker 2: Talking about repeated? I'm sort of making it up now,
Speaker 2: but really, Mariah was never better at acting than that
Speaker 2: moment around it? Can I tell you something? Watch? Can
Speaker 2: I just throw it out there anyway? Watch Glitter again?
Speaker 2: It's not bad.
Speaker 4: I've never seen it do yourself a favor.
Speaker 2: I will have movies. You have a lot of time off,
Speaker 2: so you know what you gotta watch. And this is
Speaker 2: one's real suggestion. One's not watch Glitter lo l that's
Speaker 2: the bit you really should watch. The idea of you
Speaker 2: both of them. I was. I loved it, and that
Speaker 2: man is made out of milk.
Speaker 3: Well, Matt's theories that he's AI. Now do you like
Speaker 3: him any better now that you've seen his film?
Speaker 2: So get this. I'm not convinced he's not a I.
Speaker 2: You don't, but I am a big fan, and I
Speaker 2: think if Nick Gallaxy is a I, then we need
Speaker 2: to just cut fran loose and start doing the AI thing.
Speaker 2: Because if Nick Gallaxyn is AI, which is still my theory,
Speaker 2: then I think that's it.
Speaker 3: Let him take our jobs. Yeah, we're not look in
Speaker 3: them anyway, sweetheart. He's made out of milk. Explain, go
Speaker 3: on look at him.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah, that makes imagine taking a bite out
Speaker 4: of his cheek.
Speaker 2: Actually, I think you could. He is milk duddish. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and I say this in a very like horny way.
Speaker 2: And he's very attractive. Yeah.
Speaker 4: I have a theory that people's assholes are the same
Speaker 4: color as their lips. I think you're wrong. I'm not
Speaker 4: gonna I'm gonna tell you you're wrong. So brown, don't
Speaker 4: presume the brown, don't presume the don't presume that's actually
Speaker 4: we're the coaster number eight. Don't presume.
Speaker 2: No, that's not the color of my Let me see mine.
Speaker 2: No wait, no, wait, wait, wait, hold on, Okay, that's
Speaker 2: going to be the picture. Okay, we all just took
Speaker 2: a picture of our beautiful lips, and I don't know.
Speaker 2: Your holes can't be that color. I can't see it. Yes,
Speaker 2: you care, squat over your phone. You've never taken a
Speaker 2: picture of your boody hole. No, cold, you've seen it.
Speaker 2: I've not seen Cole's hole. I've seen a gorgeous shot
Speaker 2: on a close friends of Cole's amazing ass. Oh sure, well,
Speaker 2: an amazing ass photo. I mean it's easy. It catches
Speaker 2: the light so perfectly. It's hard to take it bad. Now,
Speaker 2: give give yourself some credit.
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, I'll give myself a little credit.
Speaker 2: The close friends, I don't remember that.
Speaker 4: It's not the close friends. It's it's it's another thing.
Speaker 4: It's another thing, it's another secret, third thing. Oh, it's
Speaker 4: it's a fin st.
Speaker 2: I had a horn. I guess I still do. I mean,
Speaker 2: is it done? What?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: I don't really maintain mine neither. I think I took
Speaker 2: six pictures during like the torniest time of the pandemic.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, we have to be we have to forgive
Speaker 4: ourselves for everything we did in twenty twenty.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, truly, like all my clothes.
Speaker 4: Especially elected Joe Biden, especially Biden. We should have given
Speaker 4: Trump another chance.
Speaker 2: We're giving him a chance on the you're right, you're
Speaker 2: right now. I think o'mary would be the perfect show
Speaker 2: for him. I think he would be so good as
Speaker 2: Mary in a way.
Speaker 4: Okay, wait, let's really actually dreamcast Trump in something. So
Speaker 4: you're saying, oh Mary gypsy, heartbreaking, heart breaking, haunting.
Speaker 2: Why did I do it?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 2: Get me, no, no no no no no no no no,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna have to leave follow me in the background.
Speaker 2: That else, it's an original character. It's an original character. Listen,
Speaker 2: there's a Ronald dumb Ronald, there's a Patty sized hole
Speaker 2: shaped hole and Broadway. Yeah, and he could fill that
Speaker 2: out appeal to Patty now to return to Broadway.
Speaker 4: Is called the roommate Her and Me a Pharaoh at
Speaker 4: the booth theater.
Speaker 2: You're hitting. She was just being like dramatic about the quitting.
Speaker 2: You're kidding, You're kidding. We love her, I love her
Speaker 2: to death.
Speaker 4: Oh wait, sorry, you think women aren't allowed to change
Speaker 4: their minds?
Speaker 2: Or wait what, what's this? What I'm saying is what
Speaker 2: you said before you got on an episode, which is
Speaker 2: that women are crazy, hysterical and can't make up their minds.
Speaker 2: That's what you said. I am going to kill you,
Speaker 2: no air, no dick, Why should I keep living? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 2: great color for you and they're popping And you did
Speaker 2: that on purpose? Did I did? I did?
Speaker 4: You're a warm tone. Well, this is the other thing
Speaker 4: that I wanted to talk about. Okay, color theory. I
Speaker 4: really want to see one of those color theory people
Speaker 4: that was. But the things are thinking, I'm obsessed with
Speaker 4: me and Claudia oh Doherty. Yes, love Claudia, sweetheart, great legends,
Speaker 4: go to bed.
Speaker 2: Yeah we really sorry.
Speaker 4: People are probably like angry, my hoarse voice, but we
Speaker 4: really wanted to see there's this woman in La who
Speaker 4: does the color theory thing, who was the wardrobe supervisor
Speaker 4: on The Nanny.
Speaker 2: Oh my, well she has many Emmys. She knows what
Speaker 2: she's doing.
Speaker 4: She knows what she's doing. But then we looked and
Speaker 4: the prices were like, yeah, literally, like can buy half
Speaker 4: a ticket to Oh Mary for that. Oh it was
Speaker 4: like one thousand dollars per session, or maybe it was.
Speaker 3: Like there's eight there's someone who does that. He right
Speaker 3: in New York City. I know that you live. Did
Speaker 3: they design costumes for the Nanny?
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know what to tell. Have you
Speaker 2: ever had that done? No? I want you So. I
Speaker 2: was just watching an a SMR video you last night,
Speaker 2: of course where they do it. Of course you were.
Speaker 2: I don't even think what that stuff.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he does blued all over ill. That's classically olive tone.
Speaker 3: But I think that may seem neutral. So that means
Speaker 3: you can wear you.
Speaker 2: Want to know, this is the truth. I actually came
Speaker 2: here today and I was gonna wear a yellow shirt.
Speaker 2: I was gonna actually follow up on the tailor Tomlinson
Speaker 2: episode yes, where I said that I bought a yellow
Speaker 2: shirt in a museum and I never wear it because
Speaker 2: why would I actually put it on today to wear
Speaker 2: it to this It looked at myself and said, this
Speaker 2: is not my color.
Speaker 4: But you don't know if it's like, oh, it's the
Speaker 4: cool undertones, it's the blue undertones of the yellow that
Speaker 4: don't suit you. You probably do have a good yellow.
Speaker 4: You probably can, I.
Speaker 2: Say, when I'm a little bit more tan, which is happening.
Speaker 2: It's in process. I can do yellow, but this was not.
Speaker 2: We are not there yet at this juncture.
Speaker 3: And then the step beyond that is like are you
Speaker 3: a cool yellow or a warm yellow?
Speaker 2: Right? And I would never know what this is, so
Speaker 2: I guess I have to do this test.
Speaker 4: This is why it's dangerous to be like for us, yeah,
Speaker 4: because we don't know what we're talking about, and so
Speaker 4: for us to just sort of pause at all of
Speaker 4: these I'm yellow, I'm blue, I'm dangerous.
Speaker 2: You're so good with color. We've all seen the Apartment,
Speaker 2: thank you? Not all? Well, it was in the pages.
Speaker 2: Oh what was that?
Speaker 4: Remember it was in a magazine apartment therapy, I think
Speaker 4: you're thinking of, or in the New York Post or
Speaker 4: I don't remember.
Speaker 2: I really don't remember a really good relationship with the Post.
Speaker 4: Yeah I do, yeah, well the show. Look, the Post
Speaker 4: has always been very good to me. And what's your
Speaker 4: favorite review you've gotten? Probably the long one because they
Speaker 4: said everything. No, they they went there. They talked about
Speaker 4: the play. Me, yes, like everything that you can imagine.
Speaker 2: The play me everything.
Speaker 4: Yeah, oh my god, I'm thinking about it right now.
Speaker 2: Do you feel like you can't wait to get back
Speaker 2: up there?
Speaker 4: I am excited for a break. But healthy, healthy, thank you.
Speaker 4: I think health is important. That's one of the reasons
Speaker 4: I wanted to come on here, because I don't the
Speaker 4: play is doing fine. We don't need the press, okay.
Speaker 2: I want to talk about health, okay.
Speaker 4: Because as queer people in the community, we're not healthy.
Speaker 4: We have a different relationship from our upbringings to health
Speaker 4: that invariably does affect circumstances and basically like human rights.
Speaker 2: So well, when one of us is sick.
Speaker 6: Oh my god, oh my god, Oh my god, oh
Speaker 6: my god, oh my god, oh my god. Should oh
Speaker 6: my god be the title of app We've got a
Speaker 6: lot of great I don't think so. I actually don't
Speaker 6: think so.
Speaker 2: I don't think, but thank you.
Speaker 4: I mean I think health is wealth. At the end
Speaker 4: of the jet would know, my god, we're on this
Speaker 4: and we're back on the go. We're back on this again.
Speaker 2: We're back on this.
Speaker 3: Guys, I'm going through a tough time, are you. Let's
Speaker 3: talk about it. Let's go there, we'll be right back.
Speaker 3: We'll be right back, and we're back.
Speaker 2: So actually, probably we'll put it a break.
Speaker 4: Before the break, Bowen was going to open up to
Speaker 4: us about what he's going through.
Speaker 2: I would love for them, Oh my god, amazing what
Speaker 2: everyone would be so much? What happened? Hillary Clinton? What happened?
Speaker 3: By the way, what say what you want about Hillary?
Speaker 3: And I will It's a great title for a book,
Speaker 3: just in general, can be about any It could be
Speaker 3: a cookbook and it doesn't have Hillary doesn't have to
Speaker 3: write it. It can be anyone can write any book, can
Speaker 3: call it what Happened? And it would be great. What before?
Speaker 3: I want to hear about the pain you're going through?
Speaker 3: Now you have to cast Hillary and Trump in a
Speaker 3: show together? Oh night, Mother night, Mother's good?
Speaker 2: That's good? Who's mother? Though? I think mother is Trump?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's a two hander, a two hander Waiting for good?
Speaker 2: Waiting for Good would be not What about Chuck a Lot? Yeah?
Speaker 2: The movie? What about Amalie the musical which I did
Speaker 2: a reading of, so be careful. I'm with Pippa.
Speaker 4: No, then it was Rachel Lee Cook, Lee Cook because
Speaker 4: it was gonna we wanted to do like a sort
Speaker 4: of cheese all that. Emily sort of like, what about
Speaker 4: this sister story? Sister told them, Yeah, it's sort of
Speaker 4: like how you know Detroit is a sister city of like,
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 2: Minneapolis, Minneapolis, Detroit, Ye, twin.
Speaker 3: City, twin city. Sister cities do be random. Yeah, they're
Speaker 3: like Shanghai and Des Moines. Yeah, it's funny. I find
Speaker 3: it amusing.
Speaker 2: What is New York City sister city? Couldn't tell you.
Speaker 2: I couldn't tell you all. I couldn't tell you. You
Speaker 2: know what I draw these cities. Wish yeah, wish. Well,
Speaker 2: you know what I just realized. No, the second city,
Speaker 2: I'm telling you, the second city is called that because
Speaker 2: it's like known as like a second city. You didn't
Speaker 2: know that, No, And I then I understood why there
Speaker 2: was also one in Toronto, famously also a second second
Speaker 2: Sorry I left Toronto.
Speaker 4: If I had to live in another city that wasn't
Speaker 4: New York, it would be Toronto. Really Toronto, very cute gays.
Speaker 2: All the second cities have.
Speaker 4: Case they do Chicago and Toronto. I would say San Francisco.
Speaker 2: That's not a second city. It is if you're like consultants,
Speaker 2: I actually do. I'm looking for a consultant for what.
Speaker 2: I don't want to say a bad word, but one
Speaker 2: time a psychic told me that the community is very upset.
Speaker 2: This is a different one. O. You said that my
Speaker 2: my husband is wearing a suit. Well, that could be
Speaker 2: anything your husband could. It's the Charlotte in it's psychic.
Speaker 2: It's it's it's made up.
Speaker 4: It's suit, a hazmat suit to get that dirty hole. Hey,
Speaker 4: et night, Chinese.
Speaker 2: Hey, that's my that's my people. That's Chinese broccoli.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's not actually Chinese, is it.
Speaker 2: It was very very racist of you to say, even
Speaker 2: more racist than what you were saying right before you
Speaker 2: got on. You came in here and you were saying
Speaker 2: a whole bloat of racist Chinese broccoli. Is that what
Speaker 2: the bats were eating in the wet market? That's you said?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I did say that. I did say that.
Speaker 4: I was saying that while I was peeing to myself. Yeah,
Speaker 4: and I was bone was right there, right there, and
Speaker 4: I was being what was that guy's name, Larry something,
Speaker 4: hm hmm. The guy who was cruising the bat Larry Craig, We.
Speaker 3: Should I think enough time has passed. And that guy,
Speaker 3: you know, his whole life was did he die?
Speaker 2: I think he had. He is dead at this point.
Speaker 4: Let's call bathroom cruising as a closeted man, Larry Craig,
Speaker 4: Larry craiging, have you ever hooked up in a bathroom?
Speaker 2: Yes? Yes? And by the way, because I realized that
Speaker 2: I'm sorry about this. We were doing our episode with
Speaker 2: Do It Lipa, and you were telling the story times
Speaker 2: you have told you before, but I did redirect the
Speaker 2: conversation in an irresponsible, annoying and Verry Matt Rogers coated way.
Speaker 2: And so I want you to take the floor. Tell
Speaker 2: us about how you had sex and Madrid Airport bathroom.
Speaker 2: That's the story. Okay, haven't have you?
Speaker 4: No, I don't think I could hygienic get hard. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I don't think I could do that in a bathroom.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because the smells are because of the awareness of
Speaker 2: other people's proximity. I think growing up gay. Sorry, no,
Speaker 2: go there, just to go there. I just we'll be
Speaker 2: right back. I want what's best for everyone. Well, on second, yeah,
Speaker 2: we're back, okay, and will you were crying.
Speaker 4: I'm I don't know, I don't I just don't think
Speaker 4: I can know sure.
Speaker 3: Ideal place for an encounter probably country.
Speaker 2: I want a country.
Speaker 4: Okay, time of day, I'm gonna say Canada. I'm gonna
Speaker 4: say Toronto, Toronto, a hotel room in Toronto.
Speaker 3: Okay, we're being stupid. We did not actually ask you
Speaker 3: to expand on Toronto.
Speaker 2: What do you love about it? What? What makes it
Speaker 2: an adeal place?
Speaker 4: It's not trying to be New York. God, no, this
Speaker 4: is my impression of Toronto. Hey, we're not New York.
Speaker 4: We've got a couple of restaurants. Have fun. Yep, let
Speaker 4: us know.
Speaker 2: If you need anything, bring your kids, don't don't actually
Speaker 2: don't bring you whatever. It's it's six of one. Yeah,
Speaker 2: we got a quote unquote beach. It's just can I
Speaker 2: tell you something? Don't ever sleep ever wake up? There
Speaker 2: needs to be a gay lake and there really is.
Speaker 2: There is that's actually real culture Number two. There is
Speaker 2: at that is one of the gayest lakes.
Speaker 4: But I'm saying there needs to be like lake house
Speaker 4: culture for gay people.
Speaker 2: Yeah. The Germany Pavilion, I'm so mad. The most relaxing
Speaker 2: place on our the Germany Pavilion and Epcot. Go there,
Speaker 2: bring a beach chair, have a sour crowd and fucking pills. Pills,
Speaker 2: and that's where I'm going to be all June.
Speaker 4: Okay for Reactation Yang, Yeah, well for Pride festivities, Epcot.
Speaker 2: Well, Trump's going on in the first week of Broadway. Yeah,
Speaker 2: because Cole is still going to be an Epcot col
Speaker 2: We keep trying to get you to come to Disney
Speaker 2: with us. Well we don't. Yes, you never have. Well
Speaker 2: would you do it? No? You don't like it being
Speaker 2: growing up? Okay, we're back. You just hate it on principle.
Speaker 2: That's not true. You can say BDS, Wow, I don't
Speaker 2: like you two together. It's too much. I know, I
Speaker 2: know too much, too much.
Speaker 4: Calm down, I agree, yea, No, I bet I would
Speaker 4: like it.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, you don't have to say that. I
Speaker 2: think you would, because I think you'd see the irony
Speaker 2: in the whole thing.
Speaker 4: John Early and I once went to Disneyland.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well that.
Speaker 4: It wasn't why but Splash Mountain was fun and I
Speaker 4: wish we both wish we would have.
Speaker 2: Just like cut, you can't anymore because they've renamed it.
Speaker 2: Princess Tati's by you dip. It's the same, you still splash,
Speaker 2: very much the same, but they've taken out everything that
Speaker 2: you love, which was the racism. And you were saying
Speaker 2: that before you got on the mic, and they replaced
Speaker 2: it with Princess Tana, because that's how you correct the
Speaker 2: wrongs of the hills of the world. Again.
Speaker 4: I said this when I was peeing to myself as
Speaker 4: a joke and we were both Larry Craig, and we
Speaker 4: were both Larry Craig. Look, I was looking for sex
Speaker 4: with closeted men. Of course I was going to say
Speaker 4: that stuff.
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course you were trying to attract people. Yes,
Speaker 2: these Please don't get it twisted. I don't ever want
Speaker 2: to get it twisted. Can I say something? I can't
Speaker 2: think of anything more embarrassing than getting it twisted a
Speaker 2: lot of other embarrassing things, truly, but like, what's more
Speaker 2: embarrassing than getting it twisted? Do you? First of all, ouch?
Speaker 2: How do you feel? Just generally a lot better now? Honestly,
Speaker 2: I was not in a good mood and now I
Speaker 2: really am. Okay, I'm very happy. Do you think you're
Speaker 2: gonna have s e X with someone else. Can I
Speaker 2: tell you something? No, I did the thing. Sorry, I
Speaker 2: did the thing. We'll be right back. I did the
Speaker 2: thing where I over scheduled myself on dates this week.
Speaker 2: So it's actually I'm going to reveal, okay that my
Speaker 2: guy canceled tonight because I'm going on three dates this
Speaker 2: week with three different men. Sorry. Everyone, I'm actually trying
Speaker 2: to find a partner actively. I would like that for myself.
Speaker 2: I have recently discovered about myself that I would like
Speaker 2: to be in a relationship. You're ready. I don't think
Speaker 2: I am either ready. And it's two different right, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: someday soon. What do you Yeah, what do you? What
Speaker 2: do you think it'll take? I think you too. Have
Speaker 2: to stop being friends. Yeah, everyone's so intimidated by him.
Speaker 2: True story. It's just like I say, no, no, he's creative.
Speaker 2: I go, no, No, he's great, he's easy, he's gonna
Speaker 2: love you.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then I go and then oh, mother in
Speaker 4: law over here, nothing's good enough for her son.
Speaker 2: The last two guys I've dated have been like, I'm
Speaker 2: nervous to me bowen, and I was like, don't be nervous.
Speaker 2: He's my best friend and the kind and the best
Speaker 2: person ever.
Speaker 4: I was nervous to meet you. Yeah, when did you
Speaker 4: meet forty years ago?
Speaker 2: Forty years ago? Well, y'all did all of Europe together?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was eighty four four and Berlin was East
Speaker 4: and west, Oh my god, and we didn't know which
Speaker 4: was witch and so I was trying to buy jeans
Speaker 4: and they I said, we don't tell those here. It was.
Speaker 4: That was good, hilarious misunderstanding.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well you were. You were just saying before, but
Speaker 2: you missed Germany the way it was, that's what you
Speaker 2: were saying.
Speaker 4: And you gave a specific year too. God, we missed you.
Speaker 2: It's it's a fucking show. And thank you? Do you
Speaker 2: mean actually genuine there for a second said missed you? Yeah,
Speaker 2: we did maybe say that though, I'm sorry, I'm embarrassed.
Speaker 2: Do you not like to say hi to people after
Speaker 2: the show? I love it? I love it? Yes? Good, okay,
Speaker 2: because we didn't like go backstage or anything. Well, there's
Speaker 2: not a backstage at the Hortel. Oh it's a theater moment.
Speaker 4: It's like you have to come into the everyone.
Speaker 2: Clears out and the notables sort of stay behind.
Speaker 3: And yeah, yeah, the friends, the friends can I reveal
Speaker 3: at this point that the the opening night party at
Speaker 3: the hotel Run probably Run was at Houston Hall, which
Speaker 3: is a pretty very straight in the sports on the
Speaker 3: sports on the screen, And I thought that was kind
Speaker 3: of the perfect, perfect touch.
Speaker 4: I didn't see it the same way as you.
Speaker 2: Oh you were stressed out. You didn't like it.
Speaker 4: I thought, change the channel.
Speaker 2: Yeah, totally want to listen to you when you said that.
Speaker 4: I didn't say it to anyone. I just felt you
Speaker 4: thought it.
Speaker 2: But it's a big was your biggest that was your
Speaker 2: first and biggest mistake.
Speaker 4: You know what would be to just play at a bar?
Speaker 4: Yeah what QVC.
Speaker 2: I grew much. I should be playing qvcree. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: that would drive business, which is what you have you
Speaker 2: care about?
Speaker 4: Yeah, the economy, absolutely jobs, bringing jobs back to America,
Speaker 4: all these companies.
Speaker 2: There's nothing more American than QVC is actually culture number
Speaker 2: ninety yeah eight, there's nothing nothing more American than QBC.
Speaker 4: Because it's a conversation piece. You can talk about it.
Speaker 4: You don't have to pay attention. It's not like right,
Speaker 4: oh well now mama me is on. So I guess
Speaker 4: I'm gonna watch it, which is what I do. No,
Speaker 4: there is no through line to follow with TV sne No.
Speaker 2: Actually, in fact, there is the absence of that completely,
Speaker 2: which is why it's so great. Peak behind the curtain
Speaker 2: to when I shot. I love that for you the
Speaker 2: people that had to play, the on air people. You
Speaker 2: just have to be always talking. Yeah you literally it was.
Speaker 2: It's actually so funny when you watch because they end
Speaker 2: up saying some crazy things, sometimes just words together in
Speaker 2: like a soup that truly are just like and look
Speaker 2: at this diamond pendit now. I love this for graduations,
Speaker 2: for funerals, for you know, and and my mother had
Speaker 2: a pendant and I always remember my mother, especially now
Speaker 2: today because Janine is going to turn around and you
Speaker 2: can see the penda from the back. It's like nonsense, gobbledeep.
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter, it's nothing, but it
Speaker 2: is everything.
Speaker 3: And if you can watch it on mute and it
Speaker 3: still looks like things are happening, that is the mark
Speaker 3: of success, that which I love. And it gives you
Speaker 3: moments like the planet moon.
Speaker 4: And yeah, the planet moon, Liza. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Also, you know what's really wild is like actually they
Speaker 2: do watch second by second to see if the sales
Speaker 2: are going up and down, and it does correlate to
Speaker 2: like how charming they're being. Like, Like, at any given time,
Speaker 2: there are a million plus people watching this channel and
Speaker 2: gauging second by second whether they're buying something or not,
Speaker 2: to the point where like it actually corresponds with a
Speaker 2: I guess salesman flopping or not.
Speaker 4: I love the economy, you said, I love the economy. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I love inflation. Keeping up with those prices.
Speaker 2: Yeah, keeping up with the price.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we got to keep up with those prices. Yeah,
Speaker 4: raise them a little bit and then give us something
Speaker 4: to aspire to.
Speaker 2: You know? Was that the big conversation at the met gala?
Speaker 4: Can I get some water?
Speaker 2: No? No, no, no, no, don't anything you like? Your job?
Speaker 4: Is my lawyer here?
Speaker 2: No? Your lawyer's not here? Who's your lawyer? You want
Speaker 2: to shut him out? Yeah? Good, Elizabeth.
Speaker 4: I bet she rocks, Elsbeth, Elsbeth, Elsbeth.
Speaker 2: Have you seen all the commercials for that show?
Speaker 4: Elsbeth, No, but I really want to watch the show.
Speaker 4: It's supposed to be good.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I didn't watch The Good Fight. Neither I should.
Speaker 2: Christine's mad at you? She is? Have you met her?
Speaker 2: Christ were talking about? No, she's mad at me.
Speaker 4: Right, well, I think we can because of all that
Speaker 4: stuff you made up about me what I said, like.
Speaker 2: I didn't make anything else. It's so funny that you
Speaker 2: try to come here on what is our show? Uh huh,
Speaker 2: because even though we made a joke about you hosting
Speaker 2: it in interesting?
Speaker 4: That's really interesting? Is it interesting? It's interesting? I n
Speaker 4: C H T R S T E E ed Got
Speaker 4: it interesting?
Speaker 2: Got it? Got it? I think that.
Speaker 3: Archie Punjabi is having a moment again. Thoughts where under
Speaker 3: the bridge?
Speaker 2: We'll be right back and we're back. Wait? What is
Speaker 2: she talked about York under the Bridge? Though I didn't
Speaker 2: go to bridge? Oh you didn't?
Speaker 4: Did you go to the York under the Bridge? They
Speaker 4: were working? Did what did she do? A concert?
Speaker 2: She did an slash set under the cabridge Cambridge, But
Speaker 2: I think they called the cabridge to sort of insinuate
Speaker 2: that use under the bridge, which I find to be
Speaker 2: there was an iconic sober person. What do you think
Speaker 2: of that?
Speaker 4: I'm disturbed? Yeah, well, carefully the table is making noise, is.
Speaker 2: Shaking, he's humping, he's like a dog.
Speaker 4: Don't think gay pop and drugs go together? I actually
Speaker 4: agree I think let's just like put a let's put
Speaker 4: a pause on it. Let's put a pause on it
Speaker 4: until I figure it out what's going on. I need
Speaker 4: to get in there. No, like I'm busy with my
Speaker 4: show right now. But like if you drums, places absolutely
Speaker 4: come fall. I want to, like, I just want to
Speaker 4: open it up, open the community up, and like, look
Speaker 4: at it cool.
Speaker 3: If you were to put out like a missive to
Speaker 3: the community across the world and say stop it with
Speaker 3: the drugs for like a.
Speaker 2: Month, people would do it. I don't think they would.
Speaker 4: I think they would love drugs so much. I'm going
Speaker 4: to do it in October. Well, then I'm gonna do
Speaker 4: it in October.
Speaker 2: Was there a favorite drug back in the day? Just weird?
Speaker 4: Yeah, just baking, just baking, waking up and baking. Wait,
Speaker 4: it's we call it wake bake and we were really fun.
Speaker 2: Waken bake sucks.
Speaker 3: It was awful. It's a really bad I'm sorry if
Speaker 3: you're awaken baker. No, I just know awful. It was like, no, yeah,
Speaker 3: it is. It's a it's a.
Speaker 2: Huge alarm bell moment. Yeah. Once it becomes waken bake,
Speaker 2: that's when you have to stop and take uh, huh
Speaker 2: A second, it's recess, and I guess that's what we're
Speaker 2: saying to all the gay community. Who's really the biggest
Speaker 2: problem within the gay community is marijuana. Marijuana use is
Speaker 2: out of control in the gay community. These gays are
Speaker 2: too stoned. Yeah, they am out. Have you noticed that
Speaker 2: Taylor Swift has started to talk about weed a lot
Speaker 2: in her music?
Speaker 4: Has she yes in herre like.
Speaker 2: The Tortured Posts Department is an album about a chaotic,
Speaker 2: manic relationship, and she references like always being she was
Speaker 2: with someone that was always stoned. My friends smell like weed,
Speaker 2: et cetera. Y. Yeah, you know what I mean, Like
Speaker 2: there's a red You know what do you like to read?
Speaker 2: I don't know, because you have. I don't like pot
Speaker 2: at all. You know what I say. I don't care
Speaker 2: what pot marijuana. It's all pretty bad. It's all bad.
Speaker 2: I think reef is funny because it's stupid green flower
Speaker 2: yet never flower.
Speaker 4: Yeah, bowen, go to bed. I've never seen you do
Speaker 4: that bed. Your tongue fell out of your mouth.
Speaker 2: I'm I'm sexual. You are a sexual?
Speaker 4: Rimming the air every you know what I stopped? Yeah,
Speaker 4: I got yeah, Jardia, I had like six months. I
Speaker 4: was like, oh, I guess my stomach's just weird. Now
Speaker 4: this is a great story. You'll want to put this
Speaker 4: in the book, okay.
Speaker 2: And it's coming up right after the break Hi.
Speaker 4: I went to a dietician for my acid reflux and
Speaker 4: they ran all these tests and they said, here, you
Speaker 4: need to poop in this jar and mail it in.
Speaker 4: I said, no questions, absolutely, I'll do that.
Speaker 2: Take my poop. Take hey, you take it.
Speaker 4: And what they what they make you do is like
Speaker 4: put a bag like a little you tape basically a
Speaker 4: piece of paper onto your toilet ste oh, yes, yes,
Speaker 4: and you poop onto that paper and then they give
Speaker 4: you a little scooper yep to. I hope everyone at
Speaker 4: home is eating a nice big chocolate cake right now,
Speaker 4: and you scoop the poop and you put it into
Speaker 4: a little cup and you mail that in.
Speaker 2: Yeah to, I think the government, the government, and what
Speaker 2: do you what do you think they do with the cup?
Speaker 2: They they made clean?
Speaker 4: Mama again, I hope you're eating chocolate cake.
Speaker 2: Eating chocolate cake right now. It's poop, it's poop. Is
Speaker 2: it poop? And is it poop? Okay? So then I
Speaker 2: came out so well.
Speaker 4: Then I met with a dietician and she goes, have
Speaker 4: you been camping recently? And I was like, no, I
Speaker 4: haven't been camping since I was twelve. What what kind
Speaker 4: of weird question is that? And she was like, you
Speaker 4: have this parasite that is common with people who've maybe
Speaker 4: been camping drinking contaminated.
Speaker 2: Water or from and does she get there set? Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, And then I was like, oh and then,
Speaker 4: but so the process of confirming that you have jaradia
Speaker 4: in order to get the antibiotics is there's like mailing
Speaker 4: in your poop. Yeah, And I'm like, I don't want
Speaker 4: to be mailing my poop, Like I'm leaving that behind.
Speaker 4: I said, no more, no more, twenty four, I'm not
Speaker 4: mailing my poop anyhow, I said, New Year knew me,
Speaker 4: no poop.
Speaker 2: I am not going to that mailbox with the jar
Speaker 2: of poop. Now, that's completely insane. Yeah. Yeah, well I've
Speaker 2: had it before and it hasn't stopped me. Yeah, but
Speaker 2: it was horrible And I got it on Fire Island
Speaker 2: and you saw me. Yeah, it was bad. It was
Speaker 2: not good. You you like watched him. Yeah, we shared
Speaker 2: a room. No, but I but I watched you get
Speaker 2: your ass? Was I really you? No, you didn't. Don't
Speaker 2: tell them that. I don't want to think about us
Speaker 2: like that.
Speaker 4: No, I was insinuating that you were watching him have
Speaker 4: like explosive diary.
Speaker 2: Oh, I thought you were intinuing that I was watching
Speaker 2: him that funny house. Are sharing the bed? When were
Speaker 2: we sharing the bed when I had to keep getting up? Yes,
Speaker 2: we were, and we also shared the bed.
Speaker 3: The only only only time I've ever and it was bad,
Speaker 3: like we both had like growing up moments. And the
Speaker 3: only time I ever blocked out, oh, from the fourth
Speaker 3: of July, where like they found my wallet on the
Speaker 3: boardwalk and it was amunity effort.
Speaker 2: Tokay, the only time you ever blacked out? Good for you? Really,
Speaker 2: I would say, so, I didn't really ever black out
Speaker 2: in college or high school. Hmmm, you sound like you
Speaker 2: don't believe me. No, I'm trying to go through the
Speaker 2: rolodex in my mind to think of times I've seen
Speaker 2: Bowen Yang sloppy.
Speaker 3: It was so scary because I've never like had like
Speaker 3: a black box in the memory of like, Oh, I
Speaker 3: don't remember what happened.
Speaker 2: Well, we got your back, the wallet got me back.
Speaker 2: The wallet and thank god because a lot of.
Speaker 4: I hope everybody's credit because this goes back to what
Speaker 4: I was saying about health.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you were saying that right before we got on.
Speaker 2: You were saying you hope COVID comes back. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: stronger because like it like a gay Yeah, it over
Speaker 2: promised delivered. You think COVID under delivered compared to what
Speaker 2: compared to what compared to what?
Speaker 4: That's a really good season two fee. I mean you
Speaker 4: be specific. I know.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I guess compared to difficult people. Okay, are you? Yes? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Did you find something ever? Come on, You're right, I
Speaker 2: shouldn't even go there. Did you ever find something since
Speaker 2: Downton Abbey that you liked as much? Yes? What Gilded Age?
Speaker 7: I was always like Sideline, Like I was sideline, We're going.
Speaker 4: To take a break and not come back. We're back,
Speaker 4: We're back. The Waltons.
Speaker 2: I don't think I know that. Is that about the
Speaker 2: Walton family? Yeah? No, no, no, no, no no.
Speaker 4: They're a family named the Waltons, and it's not like
Speaker 4: the Walmart Waltons.
Speaker 2: Because you were saying before you came that you love
Speaker 2: Walmart and the family that that I love how I
Speaker 2: love their business model, Like why why is that controversial
Speaker 2: to say, like they're doing very well?
Speaker 4: Why are there on Broadway? Why shouldn't I be proud
Speaker 4: of them? And yes, they're funding O Mary on Broadway. Yeah,
Speaker 4: and I'm very proud of them. Yeah, Like, let's what
Speaker 4: they're doing is legal? Yes, like, yeah, they're cutting corners,
Speaker 4: they're underpaying, Like it's legal. If you have a problem
Speaker 4: with them, take it up with your president. Joe Biden,
Speaker 4: the one you both wanted so bad.
Speaker 2: We did We really did, Yeah, we really did it.
Speaker 4: I didn't, I wrote, I wrote in. I wrote in,
Speaker 4: uh uh. Judy Garletic, Yeah, where is she?
Speaker 2: She will be hitting trail will she's she was like,
Speaker 2: I have been wanted to be on this podcast.
Speaker 4: She's like, I want to talk about health and the gay.
Speaker 2: I bet she does.
Speaker 4: Jardia. My husband has jardia. You can't get rid of it,
Speaker 4: Jared Jared.
Speaker 2: Hey, Cush, we can't give him a cool name. No,
Speaker 2: that's not cool. That's not cool. Jake Cush, Cush, well
Speaker 2: even Cush terrible we name. Yeah, we don't like that.
Speaker 2: Gonja what about Gonjo?
Speaker 3: No, it's bad, but we really haven't come up with
Speaker 3: something good.
Speaker 2: Molly's Molly, I think funny. Who has Reef? I love it?
Speaker 2: Let's go smoke Reefer. You love it that Matt says
Speaker 2: it in a fun Wayriefer, Let's smoke a Reefer. I
Speaker 2: got Jared be saying it, not Kushner, Jared Fried, j
Speaker 2: Fried Reefer.
Speaker 4: I'm looking at you like I'm.
Speaker 2: Not sure, Like I'm a crazy guy. You're a crazy guy.
Speaker 2: I you love what I like kissing Jay every night?
Speaker 4: You tell us, yes, wait, we share a leading man,
Speaker 4: romantic lead.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry. My brain not what it used to be.
Speaker 2: It's okay. I think it's getting all the time. I
Speaker 2: think you're getting smarter every day and stronger.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I gotta say, well, I love to read. I'm
Speaker 3: reading books again.
Speaker 2: We're taking a European trip and Bowen described the desire
Speaker 2: to read, and I thought that that sounded so boring.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I would go for depression.
Speaker 3: It was so it was really good for the bad
Speaker 3: moment that last summer. M hm was I I was
Speaker 3: probably even boring you to death with it. I was
Speaker 3: just like, I've been reading a lot.
Speaker 4: No, the thing is like you actually and this is
Speaker 4: the scary part. You did not seem different at all.
Speaker 2: That is terris because.
Speaker 3: The bad moment was like in London and I was like,
Speaker 3: I have to go somewhere. I can't be like, I
Speaker 3: can't be here for I'm sorry. I keep shaking the table.
Speaker 3: And then by this by the time I was in
Speaker 3: another place and I was among friends or a friend.
Speaker 2: Was like, this is much better.
Speaker 4: So you were lying or wait what are you saying? Yeah,
Speaker 4: you were lying.
Speaker 2: I was lying by the time you got this is
Speaker 2: not real and and you were saying that we'll be sorry.
Speaker 4: Uh now we're back. No, you really didn't seem that terrifying.
Speaker 4: That's terrifying. Do you talk to anyone?
Speaker 2: No? Yeah, yeah, Are you both in therapy like for real? Yes?
Speaker 2: With each other? With each other? You know what I
Speaker 2: just started doing what E M d R controversial? Is
Speaker 2: it controversial? Controversial? Well, I can't wait to hear everyone's
Speaker 2: opinion on it. I can't say. What I really cannot
Speaker 2: wait for is for everyone in our beloved community to
Speaker 2: tell me, yeah, how I should be doing it.
Speaker 3: Well No, but I and I didn't mean to undercut
Speaker 3: what is controversial about it?
Speaker 2: That killed John Bennett.
Speaker 3: It was E m DR that did it. Yeah, wait,
Speaker 3: why is controversial? I think it's just I think it's
Speaker 3: a relatively new form of therapy.
Speaker 2: Okay, it's like there's a lot of deband it killed
Speaker 2: John Bennet. Wow, it's a comedy podcast, then be funny.
Speaker 2: Ship God, you said before you came on here, you
Speaker 2: killed her? So what the fuck? Oh my god? In
Speaker 2: the burping? What was that? The parents?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 4: No, no, the guy that that killed his wife? What's
Speaker 4: it called that documentary? And then he was, oh, drink
Speaker 4: the drink? No, no, it's not the drinks. Or was
Speaker 4: the murder in Boston?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: No, no, that guy that like he he killed his wife. Huh.
Speaker 4: And then he was like in a bathroom on a
Speaker 4: live mic going he and he's like, of course I
Speaker 4: killed him.
Speaker 2: Oh have you guys seen what Jennifer did? No, what's
Speaker 2: what Jennifer Did's on Netflex. It's like, truly the most.
Speaker 4: It hits hard because it hits close to home for
Speaker 4: me because it is this Asian girl who felt so
Speaker 4: pressured by her parents to succeed that.
Speaker 2: She killed them. Killed. So that hit home for you.
Speaker 2: That's what you just said on the mic. It wasn't
Speaker 2: like Cole who said all the nasty thing. No, this
Speaker 2: is on Mike.
Speaker 3: I'm saying, no, not that I relate to her killing
Speaker 3: her wanting to kill her parents, or killing her parents.
Speaker 3: It is this thing of like she must have felt like.
Speaker 2: It's like, y'all, if things did not go a certain way,
Speaker 2: like I would have been, I would have killed So
Speaker 2: I would have like been like that kind of like
Speaker 2: you're saying, you get it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you could have seen yourself going down. No, not
Speaker 4: killing her parents, but oh my god, this is so crazy.
Speaker 2: That's I watched the Mother's Day episode that I s
Speaker 2: and now the other night that said, oh, look but
Speaker 2: one's mom. That could have turned out really different. I'm saying,
Speaker 2: I'm like, my life turned out. It was so many
Speaker 2: things aligning and it was this. No, I think what
Speaker 2: you're saying is very kagent. I think this is good.
Speaker 2: I think you're not saying I wanted to kill You're
Speaker 2: saying you understand the circumstances in which this girl did.
Speaker 2: You're saying you identify with, sympathize with, and trust her.
Speaker 2: I need to be president. Yeah, you want to comp
Speaker 2: on Broadway acting and this girl president. What Jennifer did
Speaker 2: was slay.
Speaker 3: She was like a compuls that she lied about like
Speaker 3: going to school because like her parents late, like it was.
Speaker 2: It was so crazy. I love liars. I do have
Speaker 2: to tell you. Last night I watched the Lisa ren
Speaker 2: A Lifetime movie Mommy Meaness. You gotta get into it.
Speaker 2: It's good. It's based on a true story. It's about
Speaker 2: a mother who terrorizes her daughter to like control her
Speaker 2: by texting her like horrible, vicious things from several burner phones.
Speaker 2: This is based on the story. And Rena is just like, well,
Speaker 2: I don't understand what's happening, like what was she and
Speaker 2: she goes in the goes in her closet, sits down
Speaker 2: on her computer and just and she so good.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the soaps really like get people like Julianne Morcules,
Speaker 4: Meg Ryan came from soaps.
Speaker 2: Who else there's this's like a famous Oh, Margot Robbie
Speaker 2: was Australian Neighbors. Yeah, uh uh huh that what it's
Speaker 2: called neighbors. And I believe Chris Hemsworth was also on that,
Speaker 2: and maybe even Kylie Minogue back in the day. Kylie
Speaker 2: Minogue was definitely on a soap back and shout out
Speaker 2: to Kylie Minogue. Just saw her in Vegas.
Speaker 4: That was a great congrats by the way, I rolled
Speaker 4: him right back. Okay, Yeah, isn't that's any Frankel in
Speaker 4: a Last Time movie?
Speaker 2: She is. And it's another thing where it's like I
Speaker 2: have a daughter and it's weird. It's they really are
Speaker 2: pivoting to like it's me against my daughter a lot.
Speaker 2: And you know what was was so about this movie
Speaker 2: was like it literally just ends with these a we're
Speaker 2: gonna spoiler alert. She just like gets caught and she
Speaker 2: doesn't even like change. She's just like, well, I did
Speaker 2: it because I want us to be close friends. And
Speaker 2: the daughter's like, you're a fucking crazy person. She goes
Speaker 2: to jail for two days, gets out, and then the
Speaker 2: daughter moves out. That's it. There's like, no, there's no
Speaker 2: campy fight, there's no anything.
Speaker 4: I mean, it's Gypsy, it's Gypsy. It's Trump and Gypsy. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I think I think we found it right off the bat.
Speaker 4: It is Trump and Gypsy.
Speaker 2: What are it gonna be? It's just kind of giving,
Speaker 2: Like what's that bear?
Speaker 8: You'll it's kind of giving. Yeah, everybody loves Raby. That's
Speaker 8: really good. Yeah, that's what can you do? Patty Heaton.
Speaker 4: Why do Kelsey Grammar and I get ostracized for being Republicans?
Speaker 2: Uh huh, it's actually a really good question. Why why.
Speaker 2: It's just their beliefs. It's just their beliefs. Will be
Speaker 2: right back and we're back. We would you host a
Speaker 2: talk show? Yes, because I I feel like Broadway is over.
Speaker 2: Well it's over, but I feel like there is something
Speaker 2: that you got to be. You guys got to be
Speaker 2: careful because this is my community. Now you're right Broadway
Speaker 2: is I think for you? Is this fair to say?
Speaker 2: It's like the goal? It is?
Speaker 4: It was always the goal. Yeah, the secret dream in
Speaker 4: the back of my mind was always like, that's so cool,
Speaker 4: Well how do I get to Broadway? Yeah, this could
Speaker 4: not have happened. Everyone thinks I'm joking. No, no, no,
Speaker 4: I don't think, oh fuck you.
Speaker 2: Oh sorry, Oh I don't mean.
Speaker 3: Because because I remember you saying this to me. It's
Speaker 3: the last and then Lestener we're talking about it afterwards,
Speaker 3: We're like, oh, that's so cool, like it's it's amazing.
Speaker 4: Like I feel like I thought every gay person was
Speaker 4: always just secretly like wanting to be on Broadway.
Speaker 2: Don't you think a little bit have that dream, not
Speaker 2: quite as much as you guys, but I think yes,
Speaker 2: I've like had like the flash of the fans.
Speaker 3: Will no no, no, no, no no no. For for me,
Speaker 3: it's just like I don't think that's like Fross.
Speaker 2: Nixon that actually would be good. I'm Nixon, I think so.
Speaker 2: I think you have a better Nixon.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, better than your Trump.
Speaker 2: Who is that? I can't wait? It's sort of like
Speaker 2: who is It's like you doing fallon doing, but it's
Speaker 2: like a cartoon villain, like like, I can't it's not Jafar,
Speaker 2: It's it's almost Jafar. To get back on track.
Speaker 4: It's very cool that you're doing Broadway and is the
Speaker 4: fantasy to stay there for the rest of your life?
Speaker 4: I would like to keep working in theater.
Speaker 2: Why just twelve weeks.
Speaker 4: I work with a numerologist who she's very powerful. This woman,
Speaker 4: her shoulders are so broad.
Speaker 2: Do you think it's because of the numerology.
Speaker 4: Yeah, she's got this kind of sexy kind of Oh yeah,
Speaker 4: she's got this sexy gate. She just walks real bow legged. Yeah,
Speaker 4: and I love her. And she said twelve.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: She looked at me and she said, twelve is it
Speaker 4: actually the.
Speaker 2: Goal for you, like, because I saw you talking about
Speaker 2: this on Stradio Lab like someone else would do it.
Speaker 4: I would love for someone else to play Mary. Really yeah?
Speaker 2: And do you would you want like some like a
Speaker 2: list person to drop in or and I.
Speaker 4: Don't care as long as they're like I would want
Speaker 4: them to be like good, right, yeah? Yeah, my dream
Speaker 4: is tied up spurgess. Oh, like in a way that
Speaker 4: almost would make me be like, wait, maybe you're too good,
Speaker 4: don't don't it wouldn't. It wouldn't be that be different,
Speaker 4: That's what I was gonna say.
Speaker 2: But that would be good.
Speaker 4: And it's like thrilling, but like, yeah, imagine, imagine totally
Speaker 4: yeah yeah, and I can picture how Titus this wig
Speaker 4: would be different too, like the stupid curls.
Speaker 2: Have you had so many conversations with people where they
Speaker 2: they cast it at you? No? Really, no, why do
Speaker 2: you want to start? Sure? I mean, frankly, you'd be great. No, yeah, no,
Speaker 2: I wouldn't. But you don't think i'd be good as Mary?
Speaker 4: Hey, No, I'm thinking I think you'd be a good
Speaker 4: Mary's teacher. Yeah, you have you have you have the
Speaker 4: skull if I had to cast you in the show.
Speaker 2: It would be as I had to. If I had
Speaker 2: gun to my head leading manun to my head, I
Speaker 2: would just tell them to shoot. But I would.
Speaker 4: Say, I can't cast Matt in this show. I would say,
Speaker 4: just shooting.
Speaker 2: But no, don't actually feel bad for me. That makes
Speaker 2: it real, you monster, don't be like this is my
Speaker 2: friend breaking down, crying, weeping. God damn it. Well, I
Speaker 2: really are driving us apart.
Speaker 7: I really.
Speaker 4: I was thinking, if Bowen's Mary, then I would want
Speaker 4: you to be Mary's teacher.
Speaker 2: I think, I'd think.
Speaker 4: But I can also see a world where you're Mary
Speaker 4: and your aide I would love to see. I think
Speaker 4: I'm better casts Abe. You put all your little Asian
Speaker 4: guys as Abe, don't you. Yeah you were saying earlier, Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: I do not to put her, not because of Titus,
Speaker 4: and it's like such a within that circle. But like
Speaker 4: I think, for Howse, I was just gonna say, like,
Speaker 4: I mean, oh my God, wouldn't Sedares want to do it?
Speaker 2: Absolutely? God be amazing.
Speaker 4: But I would love to write plays. I would love
Speaker 4: to keep writing plays and other people to be in.
Speaker 4: I mean, what's very cool is that I think it's like,
Speaker 4: at this point, you just get to do anything and everything.
Speaker 4: I don't know, can we be They is really amazing,
Speaker 4: that's true. The industries are really amazing right now. Everyone's
Speaker 4: really excited and everyone is happy earnestly.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, one deserves it more. Yeah, nobody deserves it more.
Speaker 2: Fuck no, because I'm not joining this you this is
Speaker 2: you are not the host of this podcast, my podcast.
Speaker 2: And sometimes it gets earnest thanks.
Speaker 4: I think that word thought. Yeah, deserve deserve Oh sure,
Speaker 4: because we all deserve. Of course, everyone deserves.
Speaker 2: You. You are you are sister, you never had whatever,
Speaker 2: you know, You're our idol. Stop it. I mean, it
Speaker 2: is perfect. It's also I mean, watching.
Speaker 4: The show, it's the best thing that's ever happened to
Speaker 4: me in my whole life, this show being produced. And
Speaker 4: I'm trying to like soak up everything that's that's happening
Speaker 4: right now because i know soon my turn will be over.
Speaker 4: And that's fine. All our turn We all get a turn.
Speaker 4: Then we get to the back of the line and
Speaker 4: we wait and we wait and we wait, and then
Speaker 4: we get our turn.
Speaker 2: Well, you got to get fast passed. This is why
Speaker 2: you need to go to every line.
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, fine, I'll go to Epcot honestly, one day,
Speaker 4: one day, next time we're on like one of our
Speaker 4: eight day trips.
Speaker 2: Here's why I wouldn't go.
Speaker 4: I don't want to be on a plane about it.
Speaker 4: I don't want to take a plane about it, you know.
Speaker 4: But I don't want to go to the airport, get
Speaker 4: on a plane, be at the airport, get my luggage
Speaker 4: all for Epcot. Like if I was in shore wherever,
Speaker 4: where is it? Orlando exactly? And I if I was
Speaker 4: in Orlando, I would love mary down in Orlando. Yes, yes, liars,
Speaker 4: both of you smell it. I smell it seeping out
Speaker 4: of your pores.
Speaker 2: The lies.
Speaker 4: But the weed, the weed, the marijuana, the pot, YouTube
Speaker 4: pot smokers. I've had enough of YouTube pot smokers.
Speaker 2: I've had enough of us.
Speaker 4: But I would I would go to Epcot if I
Speaker 4: was in Orlando already, all right, Okay, so we just
Speaker 4: have to figure out a way to trap me in Orlando,
Speaker 4: entrapment central Florida. I did do it, We can do it.
Speaker 4: What's that face for?
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know if I could do it.
Speaker 2: I don't know about like really Florida in general. The
Speaker 2: hell of a drug. But yeah, you do have to
Speaker 2: kind of go there to go to Disney World. So
Speaker 2: that's I guess where we're rubbing it. It's just it's
Speaker 2: the plane, correct, the airports. You don't like to fly.
Speaker 2: I don't like it.
Speaker 4: It's very scary because growing up there, Okay, I just like.
Speaker 2: I never got to soar and to be that high.
Speaker 2: Like it's like, m.
Speaker 7: Everything it reminds me of like what I didn't get
Speaker 7: growing up. And I'm sorry, I have to go poop.
Speaker 2: We'll be right back. Are you pooping a lot? I
Speaker 2: do poop a lot. That's good, Yeah, you poo a lot.
Speaker 2: I'm a vegan mm hmm.
Speaker 3: So all of this really supports the idea that I've had,
Speaker 3: which is that coal not to actually earnestly get on health.
Speaker 4: But I find you to be very healthy. Thank you
Speaker 4: for saying that. Overall, it's one of my main initiatives
Speaker 4: going to Broadway. Make Broadway healthy again, bring healthy back,
Speaker 4: bring health back to Broadway. People think, oh, capitalism's ruining
Speaker 4: theater because ticket prices are I think we eat right,
Speaker 4: mm hmm. We get the good eight hours of sleep
Speaker 4: we need. Finances will catch up. Do you clean well
Speaker 4: because you eat like don't sleep well. You don't sleep well.
Speaker 4: I stay up every night till five am. Seriously, tell
Speaker 4: me what time do you get up? If I'm on
Speaker 4: my own, I'll wake up at like if I have
Speaker 4: nowhere today?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Three? Really, So you're nocturnal.
Speaker 4: Nocturnal always happen?
Speaker 2: Does that bother you that you don't see the morning? Yes?
Speaker 2: What do we do? I don't know? Birding? Birding, birding?
Speaker 4: Like when oh you want to like go like look
Speaker 4: at the bird. I've thought about that because I need
Speaker 4: a hobby. It's actually, do you bird? I've started to
Speaker 4: have an app.
Speaker 2: I have an app.
Speaker 3: Merlin is the one that the Cornell Institute of Ornithology
Speaker 3: or whatever, like they have a department.
Speaker 4: Oh, they're really problematic. Actually because you're the.
Speaker 2: President, you were saying before, you're gonna and it's been
Speaker 2: your mission, Yeah, to problematize, to kill the birds, kill
Speaker 2: the beds. Very well.
Speaker 4: I mean it's interesting because that's that feeds into my
Speaker 4: I don't think.
Speaker 2: Oh you sang that song at Queer's Live I did
Speaker 2: means a lot to me again that we should do
Speaker 2: it again. It means a lot to me that you
Speaker 2: came to the show. Thank you what if we did
Speaker 2: Queers live at like Radio City Music Hall. Yeah, let's
Speaker 2: do it, do it? They offered, Actually, we're offered a
Speaker 2: show this other thing maybe we should do Maybe we
Speaker 2: should do that. That's fun, that could be really fun
Speaker 2: or Orlando, and then that's what we get. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, if you can get me to Orlando for a gig,
Speaker 4: I'll go to Applicot with you. Okay, but really quickly
Speaker 4: I've gone burning for oh yeah, for for just like
Speaker 4: and for curiosity.
Speaker 2: So much fun. Where do you go?
Speaker 3: The parks Prospect Park at Vale of cashmir so literally
Speaker 3: like historic cruising spot, but it is the best spot
Speaker 3: for birding.
Speaker 2: It's so funny. Sure, yeah, peckers. I was just looking
Speaker 2: for a bird thing. I know. I've got Chardia. This
Speaker 2: character is a caricature. It's so fun. Get a nice
Speaker 2: pair of binoculars and then you go, you go in
Speaker 2: the mornings and it's all how much were they? How
Speaker 2: much were they?
Speaker 4: The binoculars I actually got.
Speaker 3: I'm at a mid price, like I mean, they do
Speaker 3: go crazy, got like eighty bucks.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, they're expensive.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I bought one for eighty bucks. And then but
Speaker 3: then you go there it's all these old women, but
Speaker 3: the the activity itself is free, and the old women
Speaker 3: there compared to boomer how about that generational you can't okay.
Speaker 3: And then in a group, well, there's it seems like
Speaker 3: there's there's a lot of walks. There's like a queer
Speaker 3: birding group, and there's like you know, like whatever, like
Speaker 3: different beer birding group, queer birding groups already redund but
Speaker 3: and then there's like all these guys with cameras. But
Speaker 3: it's it's like nice, it's like you get all types
Speaker 3: and it's free guys.
Speaker 2: God, that makes me so horny.
Speaker 4: I love guys with camera Oh my god.
Speaker 3: And it's it's just four different people telling you, like
Speaker 3: there's this scarlet tanneger today. Oh, like they're they're like
Speaker 3: pointing it out to you, or it's like they're politely
Speaker 3: being like, do you see there's a there's a nutatch today.
Speaker 2: It's so sweet. It's very stating.
Speaker 3: I heard, I heard, and then no, no, no it's not,
Speaker 3: and then and then I'm sorry. Looking at a bird
Speaker 3: up close in the binoculars in three D space as
Speaker 3: the lights hitting it, it is like incredible.
Speaker 4: And that sounds more healthy than and like gambling totally.
Speaker 4: But it's the same. It feeds the same, and it
Speaker 4: feeds the same. I like, I want to I want
Speaker 4: to win, I want to catch. Yes the thing and
Speaker 4: it's like all you're doing is looking at a bird.
Speaker 2: You're looking at a bird, and then you think, oh,
Speaker 2: is that gonna hurt exactly? It's maybe the race. They
Speaker 2: want their privacy. It's one of those things. It's one
Speaker 2: of those.
Speaker 3: Hobbies where I'm like, why the fuck do people get
Speaker 3: into this? And then you do it once and you're like, oh,
Speaker 3: I get it.
Speaker 4: I promised, And it seems like it would be something
Speaker 4: fun to add to traveling, Like if you're traveling and
Speaker 4: you're like, ooh, I'm going to see what kind of
Speaker 4: birds they have here?
Speaker 2: A big yellow, a big yellow. Oh the big yellow. Oh.
Speaker 3: I I went to Canada and I saw all the
Speaker 3: big yellow I'm genuinely excited to do that. Yeah, when
Speaker 3: I go.
Speaker 2: This will loop back around to activity I can't do
Speaker 2: because of color blindness. No, I am color blind as well.
Speaker 2: You actually are. I am, don't.
Speaker 4: I can't tells the difference between green and brown a
Speaker 4: lot of the time.
Speaker 2: Neither can I. Yeah, it's your red green colored one right,
Speaker 2: And so.
Speaker 4: When I was a kid, I would color the tree.
Speaker 2: Sorry, okay, I.
Speaker 7: Would color the trunks of the trees green and the
Speaker 7: leaves brown, and I would get points knocked up.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Mine is two and there were only.
Speaker 4: There's only yeah, like ten points.
Speaker 2: My sister I used to think she had green hair
Speaker 2: all my life, Yeah, because she had brown hair and
Speaker 2: it looked green to me. And I thought peanut butter
Speaker 2: was green. I probably still do, to be honest. Blue
Speaker 2: and purple and peacha possible. Sometimes weird ones like orange.
Speaker 4: Have you ever worn those glasses?
Speaker 2: Yes, but they're a scam. I never tried them.
Speaker 4: I was gonna say, like, oh, that would have been
Speaker 4: a fun thing for us to do today, But they're
Speaker 4: a scam.
Speaker 2: Honestly, my you did a secret Sanna and my one
Speaker 2: friend got me those colors, those glasses, and it ended
Speaker 2: up being like I put them on, and I'm like, well,
Speaker 2: if this is what everyone sees normally, it's hell yeah.
Speaker 2: And I just thought, because you know, they're like those
Speaker 2: red glasses, I just saw like red, like I didn't
Speaker 2: see anything, no new.
Speaker 4: I wonder if they bought the cheap ones or something.
Speaker 4: I mean, certainly who is this friend? Name them Chrish
Speaker 4: like like Chris, you cheap bastard.
Speaker 2: But also he got me a like a set though
Speaker 2: at the same time it wasn't the only gift he
Speaker 2: got me, like a like a shirt, was it like
Speaker 2: a So.
Speaker 4: You're a spoiled little your daddy's brat y.
Speaker 2: Yes, always have been, always will be. Yeah, never will change,
Speaker 2: will brat. I love a brat.
Speaker 3: It's so fun. Mary's kind of a brat. I love, yeah, brat,
Speaker 3: brat total I'm a brat. I know that about you. Yeah,
Speaker 3: they demanded a very nice hotel room.
Speaker 2: Did the Amsterdam and I gave it? Yeah, the sofa tel.
Speaker 2: Did we get breakfast the next day? We did? We did? Yeah,
Speaker 2: great breakfast. I rest there. I think maybe my favorite
Speaker 2: city that I've been as breakfast is Amsterdam. London's great
Speaker 2: kid naming cities. Well, I like, I forgot the rest.
Speaker 2: I loved BRUEs actually Tucky.
Speaker 4: I like California, Atlantic Ocean.
Speaker 2: It's time for I don't think so, honey. Before our
Speaker 2: friend really embarrassed him. I'm in a cave. I'm doing
Speaker 2: a thing with a cup a cave. It's a visual medium.
Speaker 2: You look silly. We got cameras since you've last been
Speaker 2: on No this is I don't think so, honey. One
Speaker 2: thing hasn't changed, one thing hasn't changed. We still do
Speaker 2: this goddamn segment. Okay, I don't think so. Money. We
Speaker 2: ran against something in pop culture that's not so great
Speaker 2: to us, and I had an experience this weekend, and
Speaker 2: I would like to talk about.
Speaker 3: Okay, tough, tough couple of days for my girl. This
Speaker 3: is Matt Rodgers. I don't think so many as time
Speaker 3: starts now, I don't.
Speaker 2: Think so, honey. If you show up to a theme
Speaker 2: party and you don't have anything on that's the theme
Speaker 2: maybe and it's no, did I tell you something? Stop it? Okay,
Speaker 2: because I haven't even been in I hadn't even been
Speaker 2: doing that for ten seconds, and you sided with all
Speaker 2: of them, and that says a lot about what's gonna
Speaker 2: happen going forward. You're gonna side with them outside of
Speaker 2: this dynamic, and I agree with Cole. I'm sick of
Speaker 2: us because if you're going to keep doing this, I'm
Speaker 2: second into my I don't think so. When I'm doing
Speaker 2: a really good one that no one's ever talked about before,
Speaker 2: which is that the theme party. People should dress the theme,
Speaker 2: and you undermine me. Just sit there and count down
Speaker 2: how much time I have left during my time? How
Speaker 2: about that? I'm sick of you at a theme party.
Speaker 2: Say the theme is New Year's Eve. I want to
Speaker 2: see a couple of hats and glasses please for Christ's sake,
Speaker 2: because I show up. If you do that again, we're
Speaker 2: gonna have a huge problem. This podcast is over. I agree,
Speaker 2: I don't think so, honey it now wait? Hold on?
Speaker 2: Was is the theme was the theme New Year's Eve?
Speaker 2: Because it was Tom Kny's birthday party held at the
Speaker 2: house of Tom Nye and Matt Whitaker, and they had
Speaker 2: a New Year's Eve themed thirtieth birthday for Thomas. And
Speaker 2: I show up and I don't know if that everyone
Speaker 2: is too cool, but no one was doing the theme.
Speaker 2: And I looked silly in a white jacket, fun glasses, yea,
Speaker 2: and it looks silly and I'm I'm the only one
Speaker 2: dressed for the theme. And then I get looked at
Speaker 2: once over by everyone and I'm like, it's the theme.
Speaker 3: Oh, I don't like to see If it's a party
Speaker 3: and gay guys are there and they once over, you
Speaker 3: give me a break get out.
Speaker 2: It's like, I'm dressed perfect and y'all just look like
Speaker 2: you put a flannel on and rolled out of bed.
Speaker 2: You're on your way to Animal afterwards. I get everyone
Speaker 2: wants to look their best for Animal. The Sip and
Speaker 2: Twirl of Brooklyn. I want to apologize to you. That
Speaker 2: would be I think I'm really sorry mhm if you
Speaker 2: were offended.
Speaker 3: You there, Well, I'm really sorry for interrupting you. I
Speaker 3: didn't mean to No, that's okay, are right, And I
Speaker 3: don't mean to bring it past you know what, Oh
Speaker 3: my god that I interrupted.
Speaker 2: Equivalent injustices. You know what happens is Cole what Sometimes
Speaker 2: I get over caffeinated for the podcast and I get excited,
Speaker 2: and especially when we have a guest that I'm really
Speaker 2: excited to talk to and really like into. Yeah, I
Speaker 2: will often do the most disabled can I tell you,
Speaker 2: I don't mind.
Speaker 3: And people seem to think that I have a problem
Speaker 3: with you, like kind of like getting over enthusiastic, and
Speaker 3: it's like that's what I love and I really don't care.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's called a podcast.
Speaker 2: Bit when they go and I'm like, why are you
Speaker 2: infantalizing Bowen? Like I'm just like like I'm a child
Speaker 2: to them. It seems like it's like Bowen Yang. If
Speaker 2: Bowen Yang ever thought that I would out of pocket.
Speaker 2: I have heard it, and I would hear it and
Speaker 2: I would think that that's something we.
Speaker 4: Shared and loves wearing diapers.
Speaker 3: We were talking about this yesterday, me Josh Sharp, Max
Speaker 3: Whitert at a party and we were saying that people,
Speaker 3: we just want to try one day where we're an
Speaker 3: adult diapers, just to see what it's like, because the
Speaker 3: models on adult diapers are just the way they cast
Speaker 3: models for adult diapers is so amazing because.
Speaker 4: It is these well I've been in those rooms. Oh yeah,
Speaker 4: well and you never booked, right, But it's people who
Speaker 4: and this is why you didn't book.
Speaker 2: It's because it's people who look happy, healthy.
Speaker 4: And now you look better, but back then you brought
Speaker 4: you probably looked really gone, drinking and trying to get
Speaker 4: work as a diaper model. And that was my low,
Speaker 4: that was my rock bottom.
Speaker 2: I was.
Speaker 4: Hungover, you know, lost my phone, lost my wallet. I
Speaker 4: would show up to these castings put on that diaper.
Speaker 4: It's you know, me and Geena Davis. That's for the
Speaker 4: not for the same spot, and she's you know.
Speaker 2: The Picture of health, the Picture of Health Academy Award winner,
Speaker 2: can be very believable in the diaper.
Speaker 4: Absolutely, you know. Yeah, But then of course neither of
Speaker 4: us got it, because that's how this fucked up industry.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I gotta say it. Well, I have to
Speaker 2: sell you something. She booked it. They just they replaced
Speaker 2: her with the coke bear. They put the coke bear
Speaker 2: over her.
Speaker 3: The cocaine bear. Yeah, yes, from Elizabeth Banks's movie. But
Speaker 3: can I tell you something? What now with this play?
Speaker 3: World's your oyster?
Speaker 2: It really is you? Thank you? Wait, you really? But
Speaker 2: you want to wear it? Like?
Speaker 4: Would you wear the diaper like in life? Like under
Speaker 4: your pants in life? Like just walk around just to
Speaker 4: walk around peepee?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah for sure. If you're gonna wear it, you
Speaker 2: might as well use it. If I pop though, I
Speaker 2: think I would pee, I would think myself, but I
Speaker 2: don't know if I'd poop on myself.
Speaker 4: We just want to try one night at the club.
Speaker 4: Listeners are gonna hate this episode.
Speaker 2: It's so much poop.
Speaker 4: I just telling I'm telling you guys right now, I
Speaker 4: have to say.
Speaker 2: It would be right in line with how they felt
Speaker 2: about our other episodes recently. So that's actually okay, all right,
Speaker 2: I think I have something I don't think that's great.
Speaker 2: And this is not three missed calls. Oh oh god,
Speaker 2: that's a little disconcerting. You know what I mean? I
Speaker 2: can wait? Okay, Well, where are they from? I'll never
Speaker 2: know because it's like random numbers. It always gives me
Speaker 2: a little bit of anxiety. Okay, this is I don't
Speaker 2: think so, honey, and it's time stress. Now, I don't
Speaker 2: think so honey. Pills You want me to put what
Speaker 2: where in my mouth?
Speaker 3: Here's what my mouth is for smiling, saying a nice
Speaker 3: compliment to a friend.
Speaker 2: You look amazing today, both of you. How are you
Speaker 2: gonna get better when you get sick?
Speaker 4: Suckin' fucking rimming? Not first swallowing a little rock. That
Speaker 4: might not make me better, It might actually make me
Speaker 4: feel worse. This mouth is exit, oh learning, that's right.
Speaker 4: Nothing goes in if I have my drathers, if my
Speaker 4: perfect days, if nothing goes into my mouth, if only
Speaker 4: stuff comes out like a funny joke, a word vomit, I'll.
Speaker 3: Say it, just kidding. I need to eat. But pills
Speaker 3: make everything a vaccine. Or actually, I would love a
Speaker 3: micro trip in me if it may, If you could
Speaker 3: just download a cure to the brain, was perfect.
Speaker 2: Seems like that was polarizing. Let me tell you something.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna get emotional. Go there. If you get sick,
Speaker 2: you better take pills. Because I know it's been very
Speaker 2: tense between us today. But if you anything ever happened
Speaker 2: to you, I would not be able to continue on.
Speaker 2: And I'm not gonna let cool between us. I really
Speaker 2: have we by the way we now know he eats
Speaker 2: with his buttholes with his mouth. Oh yeah, I'm trying
Speaker 2: to desperately out here.
Speaker 4: Ok okay, okay, worming that the as let's warm up
Speaker 4: our bodies, actually relax, roll our shoulders, little warm ups,
Speaker 4: be forever, show I do. That's good. Has taught me
Speaker 4: a lot about that's a pro. He's a he's a
Speaker 4: pro about like protecting. And yeah he's not even like
Speaker 4: actively teaching me. I'm just like watching him going cool.
Speaker 2: Here's how you do? Cut? Cow? That was so mean?
Speaker 4: That was so mean, Matt, Yeah, cow, that's that's a
Speaker 4: that's a tagalog. Yike, you better cut that. You better
Speaker 4: cut that? Can I say in a real way yes,
Speaker 4: what happened.
Speaker 2: With your Lies? Love at the Tony's Really? Thank you?
Speaker 2: Isn't that weird? Thank you?
Speaker 4: It was so good. I guess an overcrowded season, was
Speaker 4: it though? Or I just like a lot of shows.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't know. It was yo, and then I was
Speaker 2: like when I saw that it got almost nothing, I
Speaker 2: was like, oh, maybe it wasn't eligible. Maybe that was
Speaker 2: last year and then it was eligible.
Speaker 4: But you know it's like summer movies, how they are
Speaker 4: like less likely to get oscars. Like people didn't remember it. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I guess, or I don't know. That's the only explanation.
Speaker 2: Like it just was like totally blanked across the ward
Speaker 2: pretty much. I was like, that's so surprising. Yeah, so
Speaker 2: this is actually going to be cool as schools. And
Speaker 2: they said that it has to do with feed the birds,
Speaker 2: tep int the bag, something.
Speaker 3: Along those another Mary, Yeah, very interesting. Well this is
Speaker 3: coold schools. I don't think so, honey, And their time
Speaker 3: starts now, I don't think so, honey. The scene in
Speaker 3: Mary Poppins where they go to that bank. The movie
Speaker 3: is six hours.
Speaker 2: Long, it is.
Speaker 4: That scene comes in at hour five. It takes up
Speaker 4: another hour, they get a song, the men get a song,
Speaker 4: and I understand the point of that scene is to
Speaker 4: be boring, to show like, oh they need Mary Poppins.
Speaker 2: This is boring thirty seconds you know what?
Speaker 4: Thematically? How that scene have no music?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: You know right, it's Mary brings the music in and
Speaker 4: for that matter, no music before she comes in either. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 4: except for maybe the children to show that they want music.
Speaker 4: You know, because when was the last time you watched
Speaker 4: Mary Poppins.
Speaker 2: I watched the returns. No, but this isn't.
Speaker 4: I haven't watched it because you're scared of that bank scene.
Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying. And that's when you're so right,
Speaker 2: And can I tell you something?
Speaker 3: Yeah, the whole arc of Mary Poppins. That movie is
Speaker 3: like not to bring drugs in again. It is like
Speaker 3: it's all a calm down after they go to to
Speaker 3: super califradulistic.
Speaker 2: Pot come down. It's pot comes.
Speaker 4: It's like that classic man.
Speaker 5: You're coming down off of feeling and you're like shaking
Speaker 5: and shapes sucks and you get the and you're like
Speaker 5: your teeth hurt and you're like, oh my god, why
Speaker 5: did I smoke all that?
Speaker 2: Pot drug, Wake and bag all right, Wake and bacon
Speaker 2: fly in. Yeah, that classic was like stupid. And Mary
Speaker 2: Poppins is so fucking dumb crazy you were saying before,
Speaker 2: just like every woman you said that before. Mary Poppins
Speaker 2: is so dumb, just like every crazy, hysterical woman. Now, so.
Speaker 4: Julian Andrews drag Julian Andrews can fuck.
Speaker 2: Can fuck? I bet you know what's crazy what she
Speaker 2: has fucked. And you know you think about Julie Andrews
Speaker 2: and you don't think about sucking. But and not everyone
Speaker 2: has seen Victor Vittoria. But her career after Sound of
Speaker 2: Music was I need to like let go of.
Speaker 4: I think she made a movie with Blake Edwards where
Speaker 4: she was like topless.
Speaker 2: Several movies right after. And there's a lot of subtext
Speaker 2: in Princess Diaries about how she's an informaniac.
Speaker 4: I don't think so, honey. Can I coin a phrase?
Speaker 4: I don't think so, honey. That was the Kelsey Now
Speaker 4: now it's done.
Speaker 2: Now it's done now, and now I just feel silly
Speaker 2: about the whole lot on Can I say something though? Yeah?
Speaker 4: I think today this podcast and you guys are back,
Speaker 4: Thank you so much, like I was.
Speaker 2: A lot of people are period. I'm not even kidding.
Speaker 2: A lot of people are going to say.
Speaker 4: You guys are back, and I want you to be friends.
Speaker 4: Earlier I wanted you guys to not be friends.
Speaker 2: Can I tell you something? There's nothing you could have
Speaker 2: said that would have come between us? Really? Wow, that
Speaker 2: really made me scared? Really really, what do you know? Well?
Speaker 2: Should I? Yeah, that's that's the dichotomy bo and don't me? Yeah?
Speaker 4: I know, No, I really just I'm I was worried
Speaker 4: and now I'm not.
Speaker 2: You're welcome. I hope that this episode inspired confidence, and
Speaker 2: I hope it inspired period period and I hope it
Speaker 2: inspired Yeah, go see what Wicked?
Speaker 4: Oh Mary, go see Wicked the movie and oh Mary
Speaker 4: on Broadway?
Speaker 2: How do you think Wicked the movie is going to
Speaker 2: be Pretendy's not here?
Speaker 4: Oh I can't wait. I really can't. And I've never
Speaker 4: seen it on stage.
Speaker 2: You've never seen it on.
Speaker 4: I know, I I know, I would, I know, I would.
Speaker 2: You gotta go, you gotta go.
Speaker 4: It's that thing where I forget that.
Speaker 2: Can just go. Oh yeah, yeah, absolutely can just go.
Speaker 4: In fact, I'm like I don't have tickets, like, oh
Speaker 4: you get ticket, you get tick.
Speaker 2: I was gonna say you should go tonight, but it's
Speaker 2: Monday and famously dark.
Speaker 4: But oh Mary will not be talk on Monday in
Speaker 4: the summer. Wow, perfect, Then what are you dark? Then Sundays?
Speaker 4: You did tell me that?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Oh, like no, Conrad's like very very, very very religious.
Speaker 2: I'm kidding. I was like trying to search my mind.
Speaker 2: I remember if that was true. It's deeply not. He's
Speaker 2: such a heathen.
Speaker 4: He is he believes in like up ending all social norms.
Speaker 2: Yeah, chaos. Yeah, this is a Judaeo Christian podcast, by
Speaker 2: the way, so we have to sort of float away
Speaker 2: from that.
Speaker 3: You did inspire me to go see Hello Delity by myself?
Speaker 2: Wait where?
Speaker 3: Because when when Bernardette was oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yes, yeah,
Speaker 3: I think you know, I had a conversation.
Speaker 2: It was like I gotta go myself. I couldn't afford it.
Speaker 2: At the time. It was it was like I could
Speaker 2: not get tickets and couldn't afford it, And I feel
Speaker 2: so fucking crazy that I didn't.
Speaker 4: I feel that way about Patty and gipsy id tickets
Speaker 4: at the time.
Speaker 2: You know what's weird. I saw a Mattine it and
Speaker 2: At the time, I was like she was marking and
Speaker 2: I felt crazy thinking that, but like I think she was, well,
Speaker 2: I'm Laura.
Speaker 4: An apt crush show is I can't imagine doing that
Speaker 4: fight times.
Speaker 2: See, and that's why I don't go to Matine's and
Speaker 2: it's it's no shade, and I'm sure everyone does. But
Speaker 2: I also think that the performers know what I'm talking about.
Speaker 4: When I play I see it on a Thursday night,
Speaker 4: Yeah great.
Speaker 2: Why do you think Thursday night is the best?
Speaker 4: I am always like, oh, weekends, that's too many shows.
Speaker 4: They might be tired. Tuesday they're just coming back. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Wednesday sometimes they have a matinee and then they have
Speaker 4: an evening show and they's amazing perfect. So Thursday is
Speaker 4: right before that weekend show. They've had enough time to,
Speaker 4: you know, Wednesday, having done several weeks off. Brobably, when
Speaker 4: do you feel strongest? It doesn't matter, It doesn't matter.
Speaker 4: It really doesn't matter. Like some days I'm like, oh
Speaker 4: my god, that Sunday matinee was amazing. Some days I'm like, oh,
Speaker 4: Friday night.
Speaker 2: It really is. Like so then that's how Patty was.
Speaker 2: I mean, listen, yeah, it's Patty. I don't need to
Speaker 2: be convinced at all. Like I was just like, oh,
Speaker 2: I think because I was with my family, I think,
Speaker 2: and at the time, like always, but we were being
Speaker 2: sort of like, you know, cognizant about how much we
Speaker 2: were spending on it. They were like, oh, let's go
Speaker 2: to a Wednesday mane or whatever it was. And I
Speaker 2: remember leaving being like, oh, I wish that that could
Speaker 2: have lived up to what my little gay brain made it,
Speaker 2: which was absolute, roaring performance of a lifetime at all times.
Speaker 4: And it should have been the audience too.
Speaker 2: It absolutely could have.
Speaker 3: Patty, we love you, one of the best to we
Speaker 3: we love you, we want you to live, a line
Speaker 3: that we quote all the time from Waiting for Go. Yeah,
Speaker 3: good one, Goky, we love you, we want you to live.
Speaker 2: It's so funny.
Speaker 4: Catherine O'Hare would be a great Mary. Oh my god,
Speaker 4: Oh my god, Wood Parker, Oh my god.
Speaker 2: I mean, but she's also in white Lotus right now.
Speaker 2: No she's not. Oh she was fired. Oh, oh my gosh.
Speaker 4: Chaotic behavior. Oh no, personal differences.
Speaker 7: You're kidding, guys, I'm kidding, okay, April.
Speaker 2: Fool you know what I love to say. What you're kidding,
Speaker 2: You're kidding, You're kidding. Oh my god, you are you kidding?
Speaker 2: You can do it so many different ways. No, I'm
Speaker 2: auditioning for you because I really want you to want
Speaker 2: to cast me in the show. You want me to
Speaker 2: catch you want me to want you as Mary. No,
Speaker 2: that's not what I say. No, I don't want that,
Speaker 2: and I don't think i'm right for it. Oh yes,
Speaker 2: I think, yes, you are as me as Abe and whatever. Husband, No,
Speaker 2: I'm not going to say it. Cool.
Speaker 4: Whenever I get auditions, I'm always thinking like, oh, gidding,
Speaker 4: click should get this?
Speaker 2: Oh Matt Roger City is all the time. Yeah, but
Speaker 2: actually less as of late. As of late, I'm kind
Speaker 2: of like, hey, I'm in not bad, Like I actually
Speaker 2: have a big audition this week, and I actually think. No,
Speaker 2: I don't think there's anyone that that could be.
Speaker 4: That could be, But I don't think you will get
Speaker 4: that one. No, it's too soon, it's too you're not ready,
Speaker 4: it's too big and I only just started. Yeah, well, listener,
Speaker 4: you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you.
Speaker 2: Sure, Queen, we.
Speaker 4: Are three neo you mean No? I love being. I
Speaker 4: love being.
Speaker 2: This is Broadway, baby. You watch your back or you
Speaker 2: wash your mouth. You know what, I'm actually you know what,
Speaker 2: I'm actually at work. I'm upset for you because we
Speaker 2: Actually no, I'm not because you're gonna have Sundays off. Yeah,
Speaker 2: this is a real thing. You have to go see
Speaker 2: the sunset Boulevard with the culture singer. Wait, is that
Speaker 2: coming here? Yes?
Speaker 4: Oh, let's go, let's go, Let's go Sundays.
Speaker 2: I'm telling you, I went in the West End. It
Speaker 2: was so great. She is perfect in it, the like
Speaker 2: concept that they went for Jamie Lloyd. Really everyone like
Speaker 2: it's an all queer cast, right. I wish that were
Speaker 2: so right just because they were. They were gorge It's
Speaker 2: all queer cast, right, you you're kidding. It's Queer's Live.
Speaker 2: It's what I was talking. It's like a fully like
Speaker 2: queer crew.
Speaker 4: All everyone on the team is queer. Is a mabb
Speaker 4: what's a sign mail of birth?
Speaker 2: Wait?
Speaker 4: But something I do want to say is I need
Speaker 4: everyone to buy tickets to Bernadette Peters on Fire Island.
Speaker 2: That happens, that's happening.
Speaker 4: I need everyone to buy tickets so that they add
Speaker 4: a Sunday shows a Saturday and but I think maybe
Speaker 4: a lot is sold out.
Speaker 2: It's on a Saturday in June.
Speaker 4: Or that's what they did for Patty last year, was
Speaker 4: that they sold out so quickly that they just said, I.
Speaker 2: Need to know.
Speaker 4: Waybe Bernadette wouldn't want to add a second show, but
Speaker 4: I would, but I'm dying.
Speaker 2: This is look to look to the camera like make
Speaker 2: your make your please mom a day at a day
Speaker 2: she was talking to me.
Speaker 4: At a day of Bernette Peters on Fire Island.
Speaker 2: Growing up. Yeah, that would be amazing. I mean we
Speaker 2: saw twice. I saw both nights were there that weekend.
Speaker 2: I don't know how who got me in.
Speaker 4: I bought the ticket for the second night, the first
Speaker 4: night tickets.
Speaker 2: I need to know what day it's happening, because you
Speaker 2: gotta go. Well, Boonen's working all of June, but I'm
Speaker 2: going to be there. What people's court. Yeah, oh, you
Speaker 2: would be great as like a judge on one of
Speaker 2: those shows. Well he's not very fair. He barely even
Speaker 2: let me get me through my own things.
Speaker 4: But you have to be more entertaining than fair, right,
Speaker 4: you're so right?
Speaker 2: Yeah? And if there's entertaining, yeah, as in making you know, dishes,
Speaker 2: he's gonna show his butt in a movie.
Speaker 3: I've been going to. You're gonna see squat ass squats
Speaker 3: and hip thrusts.
Speaker 4: I've never seen my buttthole and keep it because of
Speaker 4: the hair, because of the hair, and but just it's
Speaker 4: the color is The producers are puking, by the way.
Speaker 4: All the producers are puking, by the way.
Speaker 2: All fired. We have to end the episode.
Speaker 4: I believe. But I just wanted to read a book.
Speaker 2: For you guys instead of instead of us ending every
Speaker 2: episode with the song, can you end the episode with
Speaker 2: an excerpt from a book? Yeah, okay mmmm.
Speaker 4: Success is counted sweetest by those who ne'er succeed to comprehend.
Speaker 4: A nectar requires sorest need not one of all the
Speaker 4: purple hosts who took the flag today can tell the
Speaker 4: definition So clear of Victor A as he defeated dying
Speaker 4: on Who's forbidden ear the distant strains of triumph ring
Speaker 4: agonized and cleared. That was Jake ha Rowling, Yes, speaking
Speaker 4: about trans races.
Speaker 2: Bye bye bye A Lot of Culture.
Speaker 3: Racis is the production by Will Ferrel's Big Money Players
Speaker 3: in iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2: Podcasts, created and hosted by Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Speaker 2: executive produced by Anna Hasnier and Hans Soni, Produced by
Speaker 2: Becka Ramos, edited mixed by Doug Bamimni for Board, and
Speaker 2: our music is by Henry Murski