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Speaker 1: This is a Jesse Kelly show. It is the Jesse

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Speaker 1: Kelly Show. Another hour of the Jesse Kelly Show. On

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Speaker 1: an ass Doctor Jesse Friday, I give you my word.

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Speaker 1: This is normally a fairly political show, just not so

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Speaker 1: much today. Did all kinds of that stuff in the

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Speaker 1: first hour. Now it's history time. We're going into a

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Speaker 1: Labor Day weekend. Don't you want history? I want history?

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Speaker 1: So look, you know what it's time to do. We're

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Speaker 1: changing people's lives. But I'm not going to get into

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Speaker 1: any hypo theoretical. Okay, that is something I'm not gonna

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Speaker 1: get into hypoals. We're talking about the note Jade Day,

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Speaker 1: Trease Day. For you who don't, oh blah, that's called

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Speaker 1: the Night of Sorrows, one of the great creepiest, coolest

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Speaker 1: historical stories ever sor right, sorry, So let's rewind about

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Speaker 1: five hundred years ago. We're back in the fifteen hundreds here,

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Speaker 1: the Spanish takeover Cuba. They're still all kinds of adventure

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Speaker 1: and exploration going on at this time. They don't really

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Speaker 1: know what's out there, what's an island, what's not an island.

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Speaker 1: They start looking at Mexico. You know, if you look

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Speaker 1: at a map, you see cuby. They start doing all

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Speaker 1: this exploration across the Sea of Mexico. They're still not

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Speaker 1: sure when they first run into Mexico what they're dealing with.

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Speaker 1: Is this an island? Is it not an island? What

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Speaker 1: are we dealing with here? So they start sending explorers

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Speaker 1: over there. Now, I say sending it's not difficult to

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Speaker 1: find them. Let me be clear, young men then and now,

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Speaker 1: crave adventure, a little danger, see the world. It's not

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Speaker 1: a hard sell to a young Spanish man back then.

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Speaker 1: We're going to explore an area other men have never seen,

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Speaker 1: and you might die for a lot of people, old

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Speaker 1: men and women. That sounds awful for young men. Sign

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Speaker 1: me up. Sounds good. Let's go do it. I have

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Speaker 1: a shot at adventure and wealth. I'm going expeditions start

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Speaker 1: going into Mexico. Not all of them come back, Not

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Speaker 1: all of them come back whole either. They are finding

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Speaker 1: out there are a bunch of very powerful, hostile native

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Speaker 1: tribes in Mexico. All right, so let's pause on the

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Speaker 1: Spanish for a moment. Let's go over to the as texts.

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Speaker 1: Who are the as techs. This is an area with

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Speaker 1: obviously a huge indigenous population and has had one for

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Speaker 1: quite some time. The as Techs, from what we know,

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Speaker 1: they were a nomadic people from more north of Mexico City,

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Speaker 1: and that was suppose a very harsh terrain. They get

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Speaker 1: down into the Valley of Mexico Mexico City area, there

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Speaker 1: are already all these powerful tribes there, and the as

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Speaker 1: Techs are thought of as barbarians, and probably rightfully so.

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Speaker 1: They were a very warlike people and they loved human sacrifice.

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Speaker 1: We'll get to more on that later, and I mean

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Speaker 1: really really loved human sacrifice. We're going to get actually

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Speaker 1: very quickly, you know what. Let's do that right now

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Speaker 1: on my favorite, second favorite historical story of all time,

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Speaker 1: the as Techs. As they move their people into this area,

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Speaker 1: they start to work for other tribes as mercenaries. They

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Speaker 1: keep getting hired on. We need you to come fight

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Speaker 1: these guys. Come fight those guys. Let's pause again. Fighting,

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Speaker 1: oftentimes for the as Techs involves spears and something that

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Speaker 1: was kind of a sword, a big wooden club that

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Speaker 1: had obsidian razor sharp obsidian around the edges, very good

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Speaker 1: for slicing, not so good for stabbing, but very good

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Speaker 1: for slicing, very very sharp razor razor sharp. Anyway, they

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Speaker 1: get hired as mercenaries, they start to gain some power,

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Speaker 1: They start to get in good with some of the

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Speaker 1: real powerful tribes of the area. One of these tribes,

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Speaker 1: the king of the people, decided he wanted to get

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Speaker 1: closer with the Aztecs. The Aztecs agreed, and, just as

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Speaker 1: oftentimes has been done throughout history, the king married off

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Speaker 1: his daughter to the Aztecs, not fully understanding just how

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Speaker 1: horrific these people actually are. The Aztecs took this king's

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Speaker 1: daughter and instead of marrying her and making a bunch

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Speaker 1: of princess babies with her, they killed her, tore out

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Speaker 1: her heart, and skinned her. Once they skinned her, they

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Speaker 1: kept her skin. This was all done as part of

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Speaker 1: their religious ceremony, and for the Aztecs, they thought it

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Speaker 1: was a great honor for her. They had a dinner

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Speaker 1: with this king. The king shows up to dinner and

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Speaker 1: eventually starts act, Hey, where's my daughter. I remember teaching

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Speaker 1: her how to ride a bicycle. I made that part up.

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Speaker 1: Would love to see her again. How's she coming along?

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Speaker 1: At which time the Aztecs walked out one of their

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Speaker 1: priests who was wearing her skin. The king was Hugh

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Speaker 1: understandably upset and chose to remove himself and the Aztecs

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Speaker 1: from the situation. The Aztecs, the story goes, were bewildered

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Speaker 1: at why he would be upset his daughter was given

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Speaker 1: such an honor. Anyway, so that's the Aztecs. Well, I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to go over all the details because we

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Speaker 1: have to get into Noche de Triste the Night of Sorrows.

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Speaker 1: But the as Techs will eventually figure out, Hey, we're

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Speaker 1: tougher than everyone here. They keep hiring us to go

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Speaker 1: fight their wars. Why don't we just beat all them

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Speaker 1: up and take over? They beat all them up and

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Speaker 1: take over. Now, this part is going to be important

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Speaker 1: for our story about the Night of Sorrows. Noche Trieste.

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Speaker 1: There used to be a gigantic lake where Mexico City

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Speaker 1: currently sits. The as Texts decided they were going to

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Speaker 1: build a city in the lake. If there's one historical

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Speaker 1: city that no longer exists that I would see, it

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Speaker 1: would be this city. It was known as Tonoch tit Land.

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Speaker 1: I'm sure I screwed that up, but that's pretty much

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Speaker 1: how you say it. Tonoch tit land, and there were

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Speaker 1: causeways you had to walk on again, because it's in

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Speaker 1: the middle of a gigantic lake to get out to it.

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Speaker 1: Then the water's salty. I need to be clear. It's

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Speaker 1: not fresh water. It's a salty water. They built floating gardens.

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Speaker 1: They would weave things together with floating gardens of dirt

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Speaker 1: that would suck up the water from the lake. But

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Speaker 1: and so they ended up building this gigantic city. We're

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Speaker 1: talking two hundred thousand, half a million huge city in

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Speaker 1: the middle of a lake that you had to take

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Speaker 1: causeways to get to and to get around the city,

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Speaker 1: at least the outskirts of it. This is going to

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Speaker 1: come into play in our story. They were all about canoes,

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Speaker 1: farming canoes. You'd be all about the canoes out there

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Speaker 1: farming in your gardens, war canoes. If you were fighting

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Speaker 1: with the other tribes that surrounded the lake, you'd have canoes.

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Speaker 1: But they were had all these canoes and all these

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Speaker 1: little many waterways that would make entry into the city,

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Speaker 1: little many waterways that had been filled partially with stuff,

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Speaker 1: so they were shallow. It just sounds like an amazing place.

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Speaker 1: The Spanish themselves, who were very, very arrogant, keep in mind,

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Speaker 1: and very prideful of Europe and Spain in particular. The

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Speaker 1: Spanish themselves said to notch Chitland was more beautiful than

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Speaker 1: any city they saw in Europe, and more incredible than

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Speaker 1: any city they saw in Europe. They'd never seen anything

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Speaker 1: like it. In fact, well we'll get to that at

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Speaker 1: the now. Now, the AS texts have taken over, and

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Speaker 1: the AS techs are making a mistake that most horrific

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Speaker 1: evil governments make. In fact, Joe Biden Democrats fbidj in

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Speaker 1: fact our evil communist system. They're all making this mistake

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Speaker 1: currently here in the United States of America. And it

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Speaker 1: is wild to me to look back at history at

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Speaker 1: all the endless examples of this, and to know that

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Speaker 1: man never seems to learn his lesson. There is a

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Speaker 1: great lesson for all of us. Be very very very

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Speaker 1: very very careful how you treat people. You can abuse

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Speaker 1: that this may apply to your life and your home.

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Speaker 1: Maybe it applies to how you treat your kids, wife, husband,

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Speaker 1: Maybe it applies to your work. Maybe you're in charge

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Speaker 1: of people, or maybe you're in charge of a nation.

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Speaker 1: Be very careful, very very careful, how you treat people.

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Speaker 1: You can abuse. The as Techs had other peoples around

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Speaker 1: them here in Mexico, other indigenous peoples. They treated them horribly,

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Speaker 1: how horribly well? Remember I said human sacrifice. The as

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Speaker 1: Techs loved it. They would haul you up to the

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Speaker 1: top of their pyramid. Everyone would watch, and they would

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Speaker 1: make you dance oftentimes, and then they would lay you

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Speaker 1: down on a stone tablet alive, where they would take

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Speaker 1: an obsidian knife and stab it into your chest and

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Speaker 1: saw out your heart while you were still alive. Imagine

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Speaker 1: how that would feel, by the way the heart keeps

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Speaker 1: beating for some time after you pull it out of

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Speaker 1: your chest. Then once they carved your heart out, they

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Speaker 1: would throw your lifeless body down the steps of the pyramid,

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Speaker 1: where people would chop up your limbs and eat you.

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Speaker 1: But the as text I didn't want to kill and

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Speaker 1: eat each other, so they would routinely simply walk into

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Speaker 1: any village of a people they had conquered and say, Hey,

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Speaker 1: that kid, he's coming with me, that lady coming with me,

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Speaker 1: this person coming with me. Imagine how you would feel

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Speaker 1: if that routinely happened. Imagine if that were your mother,

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Speaker 1: your son, your daughter. What kind of anger would you

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Speaker 1: feel towards the people who came in and routinely grabbed

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Speaker 1: your people for sacrifice. That's how the az Techs treated

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Speaker 1: the people around them. Now pause on them, We're going

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Speaker 1: back to the Spanish. It's one of the great historical

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Speaker 1: stories of all time. The Spanish have a task ahead

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Speaker 1: of them, though, because they're outnumbered. What the Spanish are

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Speaker 1: going to need to conquer these Aztecs is a lot

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Speaker 1: of testostero. You see. I can't verify because I don't

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Speaker 1: know exactly when Chalk started. I can't verify whether or

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Speaker 1: not all all the Spanish conquisadors were on male vitality

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Speaker 1: stacks from Chalk. But I bet they all were. And

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Speaker 1: I bet you because Cortes was a man who valued

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Speaker 1: the dollar. I bet you he went to choq dot

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Speaker 1: com and used the promo code Jesse so he could

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Speaker 1: get subscriptions for all of his men thirty five percent off.

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Speaker 1: When you get a Chalk subscription for a male vitality stack,

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Speaker 1: you don't have to worry about reordering it. They automatically

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Speaker 1: send it right to your home, and well, you get

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Speaker 1: a twenty percent increase in your testosterone in ninety days.

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Speaker 1: So if you have to take on an evil indigenous

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Speaker 1: tribe that's carving out the hearts of children. You will

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Speaker 1: be ready. Chuck dot com, choq dot com, promo code, Jesse,

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Speaker 1: We'll be back. What Chris, we can make jokes. It's fine.

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Speaker 1: He got that right, the Jesse Kelly cheff. But look

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Speaker 1: at the inflation big picture.

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Speaker 2: Overall inflation up nearly sixteen percent from January twenty twenty

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Speaker 2: one when Biden first took office to last month.

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Speaker 1: Do you want to talk about that or you want

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Speaker 1: to talk about history? That's kind of depressing and I'm

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Speaker 1: kind of done with it for the week. So we're

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Speaker 1: going back to history. We're talking about if you're just

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Speaker 1: now joining us on the Jesse Kelly Show, formerly a

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Speaker 1: politically talk show, a political talk show, we're talking about

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Speaker 1: Leanche de Triste, the Night of Sorrows, her Non Cortes

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Speaker 1: and the Aztecs and all these other things. Anyway, so

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Speaker 1: I just kind of set up the as text you

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Speaker 1: want that, you're gonna have to go back list to

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Speaker 1: the podcast. I have time to recap all this stuff.

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Speaker 1: We have other history things and some political things get

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Speaker 1: to anyway. Now let's get to the Spanish brings us

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Speaker 1: to Cortes. Cortes is an adventurous young man, swashbuckling young

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Speaker 1: man getting a little restless in Cuba. He was born

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Speaker 1: in Spain. I was a nightmare apparently for his parents

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Speaker 1: as a child, just a kid who was always into trouble,

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Speaker 1: always into adventure. Finds himself on the high seas, eventually

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Speaker 1: finds himself in Cuba. Does very well for himself in Cuba.

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Speaker 1: He has an estate in Cuba. He's doing well. But

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Speaker 1: this is a man who wants more. He puts together

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Speaker 1: an expedition with the permission of the governor of Cuba.

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Speaker 1: This is going to come into play. He puts together

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Speaker 1: an expedition to go rescue another explorer who had gone

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Speaker 1: missing in Mexico. Well, as the expedition is put together

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Speaker 1: and ready, the other explorer who go missing in Mexico

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Speaker 1: actually returned, And so the governor of Cuba said, hey, Cortes,

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Speaker 1: have no need to go, And Cortes said, oh, I'm

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Speaker 1: going anyway, disobeyed the governor's orders, probably murdered the guy

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Speaker 1: who was sent to tell him not to go. They

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Speaker 1: found his body in a dish, I should note. And

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Speaker 1: Cortes took off with his very illegal expedition to Mexico.

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Speaker 1: He gets to Mexico, he promptly burns every ship but

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Speaker 1: one so his men cannot return. He begins to work

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Speaker 1: his way through Mexico. God or I mean, I guess,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I shouldn't speak for the good Lord.

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Speaker 1: Somebody was smiling on Hernan Cortes, because almost immediately when

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Speaker 1: he gets there, he meets translators. He meets a woman

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Speaker 1: who can translate a bunch of languages. He meets a

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Speaker 1: Spanish guy who'd been captured by the Mayans who speaks

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Speaker 1: a bunch of languages, so he's able to speak the language.

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Speaker 1: He starts working his way through Mexico. The indigenous peoples

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Speaker 1: there are mostly fighting him. There's a lot of fighting.

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Speaker 1: He's winning. The Spanish have things they don't swords, armor, horses.

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Speaker 1: That was a huge problem for the natives. They'd never

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Speaker 1: even seen horses before, let alone fighting men on horseback

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Speaker 1: with lances and dogs. The dogs really gave the indigenous

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Speaker 1: people nightmares. A Spanish loved war dogs, these gigantic, massive

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Speaker 1: war dogs that were supposed to be sick. Gosh, I

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Speaker 1: want to see some war dogs anyway. The Spanish are

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Speaker 1: fighting their way through. They're taking casualties. It's very hard going,

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Speaker 1: but the Spanish are out seeking gold. Now. The head

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Speaker 1: of the Aztecs at this time is a man by

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Speaker 1: the name of Montezuma. You have, after all, heard of

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Speaker 1: Montezuma's revenge, have you not. You go to Mexico, you

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Speaker 1: make the mistake a drink in the tap water, you

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Speaker 1: end up with the green apple splatters. That's called then,

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Speaker 1: that's called Montezuma's revenge. Montezuma was the king of the

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Speaker 1: Aztecs at this time. He's getting very worried about what

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Speaker 1: he's hearing about these Spanish. He sends a delegation down

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Speaker 1: there to the Spanish trying to essentially figure out what

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Speaker 1: they want. Buy them off. Maybe Cortes in one of

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Speaker 1: the all times slimy moves. That was brilliant. We should

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Speaker 1: have named this guy Hernan Vivik. He tells the as texts, Hey,

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Speaker 1: here's the problem. It's nice to meet you, as text.

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Speaker 1: I heard you guys are great, My men, though they

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Speaker 1: have this horrible heart condition. They have a real disease.

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Speaker 1: They have a condition of the heart, and we've discovered

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Speaker 1: that gold can cure them. Do you know where the

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Speaker 1: gold is? Do you happen to have any gold? The

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Speaker 1: as texts the delegation the az tech scent made the

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Speaker 1: all time great mistake. Maybe we should name them Gop instead.

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Speaker 1: By not understanding who their opponent was. The as Tech said,

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Speaker 1: oh gosh, yeah, yeah, no, we've got tons of gold. Here,

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Speaker 1: take some of it. This is for your men. When

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Speaker 1: now you just told the Spanish that you had tons

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Speaker 1: of gold. Cortes of course fooled you. He fooled you.

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Speaker 1: Cortes starts making his way to to notch it Land,

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Speaker 1: the capital of the Aztecs. Now, remember when I said

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Speaker 1: the Aztecs were abusing these people, the people around them,

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Speaker 1: This one major tribe they abused all the time. Cortes

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Speaker 1: gets in a fight with this tribe, eventually makes peace

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Speaker 1: with them, and this tribe decides they're gonna fight with Cortez.

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Speaker 1: Because Cortez is only he's only got about six hundred troops.

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Speaker 1: Keep in mind, they are like two three hundred thousand Aztecs.

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Speaker 1: He's got like six hundred Spanish troops. So this other tribe,

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Speaker 1: very powerful, decide they're gonna fight with him. Cortes goes

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Speaker 1: in it to notched it Land, ends up kidnapping Montezuma.

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Speaker 1: He's welcomed in it to notched it Land. They're stealing

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Speaker 1: all the gold, taking all the women, abusing the Aztecs,

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Speaker 1: but it's fairly peaceful for a time. Eventually, Cortes kidnaps

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Speaker 1: Montezuma in his own city, holds him captive in a palace.

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Speaker 1: This is going to lead us to the Night of

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Speaker 1: Sorrows and essentially makes him his puppet. Hey, tell these

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Speaker 1: people to do this, Tell these people to do that.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 1: Eventually, remember when I said Cortes's expedition was illegal. The

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Speaker 1: Governor of Cuba starts swapping messages in secret with Montezuma,

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Speaker 1: the head of the aztes saying what's Cortes doing? How

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Speaker 1: many men does he have? Because they're plotting to take

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Speaker 1: out Cortes together. Montezuma, for whatever reason, fesses up Eventually

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Speaker 1: to Cortes, Hey, I've been sending messages with the governor

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Speaker 1: of Cuba. He's sending an expedition of Spaniards over here

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Speaker 1: to kill you. Cortes has to figure out what to do.

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Speaker 1: He doesn't know what to do because he doesn't have

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Speaker 1: enough troops to go fight the new Spanish while at

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Speaker 1: the same time securing the city. He leaves a guy

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Speaker 1: behind into notched at Land and a bunch of men

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Speaker 1: with him, and then splits his troops and takes half

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Speaker 1: of his troops to go fight the Spanish who are

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Speaker 1: coming to arrest him and take him back. That will

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Speaker 1: lead us to the Night of Sorrows, and then I

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Speaker 1: swear we'll move on to other things. On an ask

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Speaker 1: doctor Jesse Friday, what Cortes really needed wasn't Mantezuma, though.

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Speaker 1: What he needed was Oxford Gold Group. If he had

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Speaker 1: just made a phone call, he could have had all

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Speaker 1: the gold in the world he wanted, not only delivered

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Speaker 1: delivered to his front door. Right there int noted Atland

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Speaker 1: Oxford Gold will send you Hernan all the gold and

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Speaker 1: silver's available. This service is available. Why would you not

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Speaker 1: take advantage of it? There's no need to get in

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Speaker 1: this big war and die and torture and death. Make

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Speaker 1: a phone call Cortes Gold and Oxford Gold will hook

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Speaker 1: you and or non Cortes up with all the gold

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Speaker 1: or silver coins you need to make sure you're not

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Speaker 1: wiped out when these people kill the Dollar, they'll also

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Speaker 1: get it in your four oh one k an Ira.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if Cortes had an IRA plan for

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Speaker 1: his men on his expedition, but Oxford Gold could have

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Speaker 1: taken care of that too with one phone call and

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Speaker 1: he could have told him, hey, Jesse told you to

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Speaker 1: call and they would have taken better care of him.

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Speaker 1: Eight three three nine nine Gold Oxford Gold Group eight

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Speaker 1: three three nine nine five Gold Get the Care for

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Speaker 1: Rhinos eight days with the Jesse Kelly Show. It is

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Speaker 1: the Jesse Kelly Show on an ask Doctor Jesse Friday.

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Speaker 1: Remember you could email the show Jesse at Jesse kellyshow

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Speaker 1: dot com. Trying to finish up our story. Look, the show,

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Speaker 1: we did heavy political stuff in the first hour. It's

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Speaker 1: been nothing but history ever since. I can't guarantee we're

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Speaker 1: ever going to actually get past any back to any

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Speaker 1: politics today. Why it's Friday, man, it's been so heavy

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Speaker 1: and there are all the arrests and stuff. We got

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Speaker 1: a labor day weekend, and dang it, I'm in a movie.

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Speaker 1: So now let's continue on. We're talking about right now Cortes,

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Speaker 1: and we're getting to the Night of Starros Cortes or

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Speaker 1: non Cortes, and the war with the Aztecs. Okay, so

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Speaker 1: Cortes has to leave a force behind into notched Atland,

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Speaker 1: capital of the Aztecs, to kind of watch things there,

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Speaker 1: keep Montezuma in captivity, maintain the peace back there with

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Speaker 1: the Aztecs while he goes to fight the Spanish who

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Speaker 1: are coming to arrest him. Let's deal with the Cortes

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Speaker 1: part first. The dude is he's just all guts. He

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Speaker 1: gets to where the Spanish are. The Spanish who are

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Speaker 1: coming to arrest him are apparently on top of some pyramid.

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Speaker 1: It's again, I cannot believe this hasn't been a movie

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Speaker 1: or a TV series. It's at night and it's dumping rain.

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Speaker 1: The Spanish who are on the pyramid are therefore pretty

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Speaker 1: relaxed because they think there's no way he's going to

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Speaker 1: come attack us tonight. Definitely not at night, and definitely

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Speaker 1: not in the rain. Oh but that's where he's wrong,

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Speaker 1: because we're dealing with Cortes. He decides to use the

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Speaker 1: cover of night and the noise of the rain to

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Speaker 1: sneak up Cortes and his men sneaking up the pyramid

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Speaker 1: at night in the rain, straight out of the movies

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Speaker 1: with freaking daggers in their teeth, swords out, ready to go.

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Speaker 1: They surprise attack the Spanish who are there to attack them.

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Speaker 1: They kill a bunch of them, but then eventually a

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Speaker 1: bunch of them just decide, hey, we'll just come join you.

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Speaker 1: We'll join your team. So Cortes gets reinforcements from the

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Speaker 1: Spanish who were sent to back him up. Pretty good, right,

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00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:06,800
Speaker 1: going pretty well for Cortes. Ah, things weren't going that

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Speaker 1: well though, back into notched it Land because the guy

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Speaker 1: he left in charge. I'm doing this off the top

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Speaker 1: of my head. Forgive me. I think his name's Alvarado

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Speaker 1: if I remember right. The guy he left in charge

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Speaker 1: to notched it Lamb rightly or wrongly, who knows, descended

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Speaker 1: on a bunch of az techs and killed them while

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Speaker 1: they were doing a ceremony there, a human sacrifice ceremony.

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Speaker 1: The Spanish had told them no more human sacrifice. The

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Speaker 1: as Techs decided they needed to. The Spanish killed a

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Speaker 1: bunch of them. The as Techs rebel, They rebel against everybody.

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Speaker 1: They essentially corral the Spanish into some palace where the

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Speaker 1: Spanish had been staying. They tried to get in and

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Speaker 1: kill them. The Spanish kept fighting them off, but these

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Speaker 1: men are now staying inside the palace, starving, surrounded by

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Speaker 1: angry as texts in the middle of Tinauchttland. Ernand Cortes

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Speaker 1: finally gets back and gets into the palace. He comes

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Speaker 1: back as all these reinforcements. Everything's gone to crap while

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Speaker 1: he was gone. It was peaceful when he left. Now

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Speaker 1: the city's an absolute rebellion against him, and they're all

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Speaker 1: trying to kill them. They're now all in this palace

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Speaker 1: and they're in the middle of the city. Remember the causeways.

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Speaker 1: This is a city in the middle of the lake. Causeways,

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Speaker 1: major causeways you have to cross, bridges you have to

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Speaker 1: cross to even get to the city, and then little

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Speaker 1: mini waterways all throughout the city and Cortes Cortes just

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Speaker 1: doesn't even know where to begin. What they do know

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Speaker 1: is this, they have to get out. They have to

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Speaker 1: get out of this city or they're all gonna die.

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Speaker 1: They're all gonna end up with their hearts being carved

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Speaker 1: out of their chests at the top of a temple,

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Speaker 1: and nobody wants that fate. They come up with the

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Speaker 1: plan that brings us to the Night of Sorrows going

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Speaker 1: to sneak out of the city at night. The plan

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Speaker 1: is to sneak out and then regroup once they finally escape.

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Speaker 1: They go through unbelievable lengths to try to make themselves quiet.

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Speaker 1: They even have horses still they're putting I forget what

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Speaker 1: it was, some kind of cloth on the hoofs of

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Speaker 1: their horses so they don't make any sound on the stone.

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Speaker 1: They're trying to sneak out of the city. Tell me

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Speaker 1: this wouldn't be an incredible Hollywood movie. They load themselves down,

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Speaker 1: because remember they're all there for the gold. They load

401
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Speaker 1: themselves down with as much gold as they can possibly carry,

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00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:43,800
Speaker 1: and they make their breakout and it's working. They're sneaking

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Speaker 1: out of the palace and they're making their way as

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Speaker 1: silently as possible, these hundreds of Spanish conquisodors through the

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Speaker 1: city with their quiet horses and the gold all over them.

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Speaker 1: And finally, in the middle of the night, a woman

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Speaker 1: happens to see them. I don't remember what she was doing,

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Speaker 1: fishing out gathering stuff. It's the middle of the night.

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Speaker 1: I think it was midnight. She sees them as they're

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Speaker 1: sneaking through the streets, starts screaming and sounds the alarm.

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Speaker 1: Soon it looks like a scene out of a horror

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Speaker 1: movie as tech warriors pouring out from everywhere to attack

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Speaker 1: the Spanish, who now with crossbows, muskets and swords and spears,

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Speaker 1: are fighting their way through the city trying to get out.

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Speaker 1: They're falling into the lake laden with gold, drowning in

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Speaker 1: the lake. They're losing all their gold in the bottom

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Speaker 1: of the lake. Remember I said the little waterways going

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Speaker 1: into it. They're sending war canoes full of warriors in

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Speaker 1: and around the Spanish trying to surround them. As the

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Speaker 1: Spanish are fighting their way out of the city. They

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Speaker 1: all got Cortes a million times, but they were trying

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Speaker 1: so hard to capture him so they could sacrifice him

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Speaker 1: instead of killing him, that they ended up not getting him.

424
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:12,040
Speaker 1: If they just wanted to kill him, he was in

425
00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:14,120
Speaker 1: the water at one point in time. If they ended

426
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:15,920
Speaker 1: up just if they wanted to kill him, they could

427
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:18,040
Speaker 1: have just killed him and should have. But again they

428
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:23,400
Speaker 1: were trying to capture him for sacrifice. Cortes escapes, hundreds

429
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:27,320
Speaker 1: of his men died, but they do end up getting

430
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:33,720
Speaker 1: out of to notchedittland, and that is Lenoche de Triste

431
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:39,760
Speaker 1: the Night of Sorrows. Cortes eventually regrouped, gathered up the tribes,

432
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:44,040
Speaker 1: laid siege to to notch Atland, came back in fought

433
00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:46,119
Speaker 1: another battle which I could go over. I'll do that

434
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 1: another time through the city where he essentially had to

435
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:52,240
Speaker 1: destroy the city to conquer it. They were hiding on

436
00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:54,400
Speaker 1: the rooftops and everything else. So he just burnt every

437
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:56,840
Speaker 1: building down on the way by broke his heart by

438
00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:59,000
Speaker 1: the way because he wanted to give the city as

439
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:02,480
Speaker 1: a gift to kill Charles of Spain. But he pretty

440
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:06,720
Speaker 1: much had to destroy it. But that eventually he won

441
00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 1: the war. But that is the Night of Sorrows, and

442
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,200
Speaker 1: that is a bit of history here on the Jesse

443
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:15,719
Speaker 1: Kelly Show on a Friday, and I don't even think

444
00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:18,680
Speaker 1: we're done with that history. I want to do this

445
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:23,480
Speaker 1: though again, because he deserves it, these families deserve it.

446
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:26,520
Speaker 1: I want to once again play this gold Star father

447
00:27:27,280 --> 00:27:31,640
Speaker 1: yelling about how Biden conducted himself when our thirteen warriors

448
00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:33,560
Speaker 1: when their bodies were offloaded.

449
00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:37,560
Speaker 3: In reference to the checking of his watch. That didn't

450
00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:43,280
Speaker 3: happen just once, that happened on every single one that

451
00:27:43,359 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 3: came out of that airplane. It happened on every single

452
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:50,919
Speaker 3: one of them. They would release the salute, and he

453
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:55,600
Speaker 3: looked down at his watch. On every last one, all thirteen,

454
00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:57,280
Speaker 3: he looked down at his watch.

455
00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:02,840
Speaker 1: That's why we're doing some history and other stuff today.

456
00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:06,760
Speaker 1: I'm so disgusted by this government, by the people who

457
00:28:06,880 --> 00:28:13,000
Speaker 1: run this country now, the abuses, the disrespect. Look back

458
00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:15,520
Speaker 1: to what I was talking about about the Aztecs. The Aztecs,

459
00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:21,000
Speaker 1: they defeat Cortes and defeat him, probably easily if it

460
00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:24,480
Speaker 1: wasn't for that gigantic tribe that fought with Cortes. Thousands

461
00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:28,840
Speaker 1: and thousands of warriors fought alongside Cortes against the Aztecs

462
00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:32,960
Speaker 1: as they were sick and tired of being abused. Evil

463
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:36,880
Speaker 1: governments they can never seem to figure out, don't abuse

464
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:41,240
Speaker 1: the people, don't abuse the people. You know what else?

465
00:28:41,320 --> 00:28:46,960
Speaker 1: Evil governments can never figure out. Evil corrupt governments, they

466
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:51,000
Speaker 1: can never wrap their mind around how important it is

467
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:54,320
Speaker 1: to have a decent towel set at home of what

468
00:28:54,440 --> 00:28:58,760
Speaker 1: Chris all Usa cotton. Evil governments can figure that out.

469
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:00,840
Speaker 1: Good people like you have already figure that out. I'm

470
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:03,120
Speaker 1: sure you already have your six piece towel set from

471
00:29:03,160 --> 00:29:07,520
Speaker 1: my Pillow two bath hous two hand towels, two washcloths.

472
00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:11,080
Speaker 1: I'm sure you already bought it recently, considering they're on

473
00:29:11,280 --> 00:29:15,840
Speaker 1: sale megasale normally seventy nine to ninety eight right now

474
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:19,800
Speaker 1: for a limited time. I need to stress that limited time.

475
00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:22,600
Speaker 1: Thirty nine ninety nine. Last time they did this, it

476
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:24,520
Speaker 1: sold out. It's gonna sell out again this time. It

477
00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 1: does it every time they do this fifty percent off thing.

478
00:29:26,960 --> 00:29:29,320
Speaker 1: The toiles the best toiles I've ever had in my life.

479
00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:31,920
Speaker 1: But you can't get fifty percent off and you can't

480
00:29:31,920 --> 00:29:34,800
Speaker 1: have decent towels if you don't. Go to MyPillow dot com,

481
00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:38,360
Speaker 1: click on the radio listener special Square and use the

482
00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:44,320
Speaker 1: promo code Jesse. MyPillow dot Com Radio listeners Special Square

483
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 1: promo code Jesse. Or call them it's look, it's my

484
00:29:49,240 --> 00:29:52,440
Speaker 1: pillow man, It's it's it's our people. They're wonderful on

485
00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:57,080
Speaker 1: the phone. Eight hundred eight four five zero five four four.

486
00:29:57,440 --> 00:30:00,800
Speaker 1: Don't get your towel set more ass Doctor Jesse. Next

487
00:30:01,320 --> 00:30:05,640
Speaker 1: the Jesse Kelly Show I Like It returns. Next it

488
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:09,800
Speaker 1: is the Jesse Kelly Show. On an ask doctor Jesse Friday.

489
00:30:09,880 --> 00:30:13,480
Speaker 1: So Bill Nye's this nut job. Bill Nye, the science guy,

490
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:16,200
Speaker 1: was what I'm assuming that's what he's still known as.

491
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 1: And you know, Chris and Michael, they put together an

492
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:22,440
Speaker 1: audio list for me. Every day. I come up with

493
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:24,480
Speaker 1: a bunch of audio. I like, they come up with audio.

494
00:30:24,560 --> 00:30:26,480
Speaker 1: They like, we come up with an audio list with

495
00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 1: really really heavy stuff like this. No, seriously, we have

496
00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:31,960
Speaker 1: an audio list every day of what's the latest and greatest,

497
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:35,479
Speaker 1: what are the clips and stuff? And look, there are

498
00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:39,880
Speaker 1: clips that really speak to the heart, and then there

499
00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:42,480
Speaker 1: are other clips on the show that kind of expand

500
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 1: our horizon, but the fresh clips. Every day, they keep

501
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:50,280
Speaker 1: putting this Bill ny clip on there, and I keep

502
00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:53,840
Speaker 1: ignoring it. And finally they both kind of jumped me

503
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:55,840
Speaker 1: today about it. I had to play the Bill nyclip

504
00:30:56,000 --> 00:30:57,960
Speaker 1: and I said, nobody gives a crap about Bill Nye,

505
00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:00,840
Speaker 1: and they inform me that I am wrong. That young

506
00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:05,280
Speaker 1: people actually listen when Bill Nye speaks. That floors me,

507
00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 1: especially because he's a freaking nutshell.

508
00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:12,440
Speaker 2: So everybody is very difficult to tie any specific weather

509
00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:15,640
Speaker 2: event to climate change. But if you like to worry

510
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:18,840
Speaker 2: about things, this is a great time. But this maybe

511
00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:22,240
Speaker 2: the beginning of things. And people like to throw around

512
00:31:22,240 --> 00:31:25,440
Speaker 2: the expression new normal. Well it's not really, it's not

513
00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:27,360
Speaker 2: going to be normal. It's just going to get worse

514
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:30,240
Speaker 2: and worse. Probably what we can all do about it.

515
00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 2: I say this all the time is vote.

516
00:31:34,680 --> 00:31:40,400
Speaker 1: Yeah. That's Bill Nye, apparently influential Bill Nye once again

517
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:45,000
Speaker 1: spreading all that fear out there and telling people, because

518
00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:49,680
Speaker 1: he's a religious leader, telling his flock that if they

519
00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:53,440
Speaker 1: want the kind of society they want, that they can

520
00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:59,200
Speaker 1: find it at the voting booth. Now, is your pastor

521
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:03,000
Speaker 1: going to speak like that on Sunday? Or is it

522
00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:04,720
Speaker 1: going to be a bunch of turn the other cheek

523
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:09,640
Speaker 1: you think if you think your whole congregation is going

524
00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:14,480
Speaker 1: to turn the other cheek while these people are activists, Well,

525
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:17,600
Speaker 1: I know how this story ends, and it ain't good.

526
00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 1: All right, It's move on. Jesse. I'm a maleman in

527
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:22,800
Speaker 1: the city west to Boston, Massachusetts. Five years I've been

528
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:25,720
Speaker 1: informing people with the Kami direction of our country. When

529
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:29,040
Speaker 1: I talk to people and find out and find out

530
00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 1: they want to know more, I show them on my

531
00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:34,560
Speaker 1: phone articles and websites to read. It's amazing how little

532
00:32:34,760 --> 00:32:39,720
Speaker 1: knowledge many adults have about the world situation. He's talking

533
00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:42,880
Speaker 1: about Agenda twenty thirty. Wef all stuff we talk about

534
00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:45,800
Speaker 1: kleaule Schwab hew say, I always show your folk. I

535
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:48,000
Speaker 1: always say your show first for them to listen to.

536
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:51,080
Speaker 1: I won't buy from companies that use my money against me.

537
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:53,360
Speaker 1: I've used pure talk for three years from now, for

538
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:56,360
Speaker 1: three years now. Thank you for fighting with us. Look,

539
00:32:57,280 --> 00:33:01,200
Speaker 1: he talks about how unaware norm is and norma is,

540
00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 1: and I see it because I don't hang out with

541
00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:07,320
Speaker 1: political people. Ma'am. I know you probably see it. I

542
00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:11,840
Speaker 1: see it. I'm stunned at the lack of knowledge in

543
00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 1: normal people. And not just now, let me clarify it.

544
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:19,240
Speaker 1: Not even people who are totally uninterested in politics, that's

545
00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 1: one thing, but friends, family members of mine who quote

546
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:30,040
Speaker 1: follow politics. They don't have any idea about what's going on. You.

547
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:32,200
Speaker 1: You might think I'm just being nice to you, which

548
00:33:32,240 --> 00:33:33,920
Speaker 1: I would hope you know me by now to know

549
00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:36,360
Speaker 1: that I'm not a nice person. Anyway, When I try

550
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:39,040
Speaker 1: to explain that you're the tip of the spear, the

551
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:44,200
Speaker 1: one percent, you don't fully realize how hyper informed you

552
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:48,320
Speaker 1: are compared to the rest of the population. That's why

553
00:33:48,360 --> 00:33:52,480
Speaker 1: I have encouraged you to run for office, and I've

554
00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:57,040
Speaker 1: tried to bat down this notion that people say when

555
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:59,840
Speaker 1: I do that, when they say I can't, I'm just

556
00:34:00,160 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 1: a blank. I'm just a truck driver. I'm just a housewife.

557
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:10,360
Speaker 1: I'm just a construction I'm just a blank. No, the

558
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,880
Speaker 1: idiots that are in there are the people who don't

559
00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:15,799
Speaker 1: know anything. You're the one who knows what's right and

560
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:18,879
Speaker 1: wrong and where we have to go. You're the one,

561
00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:24,400
Speaker 1: not the person beside you. You're the one soon to

562
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:27,080
Speaker 1: be half a butt. Heead. That's you know. That's not nice.

563
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:30,120
Speaker 1: That's not very nice. I've only got one day left

564
00:34:30,120 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 1: with hair. I I'm gonna tell you something. I think

565
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:42,719
Speaker 1: I just decided I was gonna do it tomorrow or Sunday.

566
00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:45,520
Speaker 1: I think I'm gonna do it tonight. Why do I

567
00:34:45,560 --> 00:34:47,680
Speaker 1: want to go home? No, I don't have a time yet, Michael,

568
00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:49,160
Speaker 1: I don't have a time yet. The wife is gonna

569
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:52,440
Speaker 1: be doing it. I think I'm gonna eat first. I

570
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:56,000
Speaker 1: think I'm gonna eat first. Oh Am, I gonna film it.

571
00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,080
Speaker 1: But why are you making the spoon thing? It's not

572
00:34:58,239 --> 00:35:00,319
Speaker 1: nineteen forty We don't have to have that. Am I

573
00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:04,400
Speaker 1: gonna film it? Ah? Why would I film it?

574
00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:05,239
Speaker 2: Well?

575
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:07,879
Speaker 1: See, here's what we have tonight. My youngest son, Luke.

576
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:12,040
Speaker 1: It's his thirteenth birthday. I promised him I would take

577
00:35:12,120 --> 00:35:15,400
Speaker 1: him someplace nice. We are going out to Red Lobster

578
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:20,240
Speaker 1: after the show. I think I'm gonna shave it after that.

579
00:35:20,239 --> 00:35:24,440
Speaker 1: That way, red Lobster. It can be kind of the

580
00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:28,799
Speaker 1: final meal, my last meal with hair. I think that's

581
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:33,399
Speaker 1: only appropriate. What, Michael, what's my favorite memory with my hair?

582
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:34,719
Speaker 2: Oh?

583
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:36,880
Speaker 1: My gosh, I don't know. We've been together so long.

584
00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:41,399
Speaker 1: You know, when I was a kid. See, I don't

585
00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:43,720
Speaker 1: think there's anybody out there who doubts how white trash

586
00:35:43,760 --> 00:35:46,319
Speaker 1: I am. But in case you were wondering, when I

587
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:49,600
Speaker 1: was a kid, do you remember rat tails? Does anybody

588
00:35:49,640 --> 00:35:53,600
Speaker 1: remember rat tails when I was a kid. I grew

589
00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:56,640
Speaker 1: a little rattail all I did when I was a kid.

590
00:35:56,440 --> 00:35:58,600
Speaker 1: I Oh, not too long, Chris. My dad would have

591
00:35:58,600 --> 00:36:00,000
Speaker 1: tore it off. In fact, I think I had to

592
00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:02,200
Speaker 1: hide it from him. I think it was only three

593
00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:04,800
Speaker 1: or four inches long. But when I was a kid,

594
00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:07,880
Speaker 1: I grew a rat tail in my hair, and I

595
00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:10,120
Speaker 1: remember those times as a kid, a mom would take

596
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:12,480
Speaker 1: me to costcutters in the mall to get my hair cut,

597
00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:15,759
Speaker 1: and oftentimes the haircut ladies they would hurt me and

598
00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:18,200
Speaker 1: they would like bounce the clippers and stuff off my

599
00:36:18,239 --> 00:36:20,359
Speaker 1: head because none of those people care about what they're doing.

600
00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:22,960
Speaker 1: And I remember what great preparation that was for boot

601
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,440
Speaker 1: camp when they abused you when they cut your hair.

602
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:29,200
Speaker 1: At one point in time, I decided I was going

603
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:31,440
Speaker 1: to slick back my hair. I think this is junior

604
00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:33,840
Speaker 1: high or something like that, So I just slathered it

605
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:35,680
Speaker 1: up with a bunch of gel stuff. You know, you're

606
00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:37,800
Speaker 1: doing anything you can to try to get pretty girls

607
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:39,800
Speaker 1: at that point in time, and I tried to slick

608
00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:42,200
Speaker 1: it back. I don't remember that lasting very long because

609
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:45,080
Speaker 1: it wouldn't stay back. It eventually just spiked up during

610
00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:47,240
Speaker 1: the day, so it'd stay slick back for an hour.

611
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:52,560
Speaker 1: But I mean, me and this hair, I just I'm

612
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 1: gonna miss him, that's all. I'm gonna miss him. No,

613
00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,399
Speaker 1: I'm kidding, I'm good back. I am. I'm gonna miss

614
00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:02,319
Speaker 1: having ear. But I think a big part of me

615
00:37:02,400 --> 00:37:05,200
Speaker 1: is going to enjoy the low maintenance ness. I don't

616
00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:07,399
Speaker 1: think that's the word, but it is now, the low

617
00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:11,480
Speaker 1: maintenance ness of being buzzed going bald. You can't say

618
00:37:11,520 --> 00:37:14,040
Speaker 1: it's not bald. It is bald when I'm buzzing the

619
00:37:14,080 --> 00:37:19,520
Speaker 1: hair down. All right, focus everyone, focus, Let's talk politics

620
00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:22,000
Speaker 1: and do I do some more history with me? Do

621
00:37:22,080 --> 00:37:24,360
Speaker 1: you like doing a little more history? Hang on,