WEBVTT - Benny Recall 0:00:00.640 --> 0:00:05.400 Kaboom. If you thought more hours a day, minutes a 0:00:05.440 --> 0:00:09.200 week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of 0:00:09.240 --> 0:00:12.879 the old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats 0:00:12.880 --> 0:00:15.760 crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the rich 0:00:15.800 --> 0:00:20.160 pill poppers in the penthouse, to clearing house of hot takes, 0:00:20.239 --> 0:00:24.040 break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben 0:00:24.079 --> 0:00:30.520 Maller starts right now in the air everywhere on a Saturday's. 0:00:30.600 --> 0:00:37.960 Saturday's Saturday, Welcome into the Magic Podcast Salt Mine, another 0:00:38.560 --> 0:00:41.840 edition of The Fifth Hour, a spinoff of the Overnight Show. 0:00:41.840 --> 0:00:44.600 We thank you for finding the program. Spent some time 0:00:44.640 --> 0:00:48.800 with you here on a Saturday from the Secret Podcast 0:00:48.920 --> 0:00:53.160 Studio deep in the north Woods. And I'm loving I'm 0:00:53.200 --> 0:00:56.639 absolutely loving it, like that old McDonald's catchphrase, back and day. 0:00:56.640 --> 0:01:00.440 You're loving it this new podcast studio. Now, I I 0:01:00.480 --> 0:01:03.959 am twenty four hours a day readily available via commercial 0:01:04.040 --> 0:01:07.600 radio or podcasting. And I know that makes you very happy. 0:01:07.600 --> 0:01:10.000 They are. You're very excited about that? Why not? It's 0:01:10.040 --> 0:01:14.920 a it's an exciting time. Yes. The Mallard Militia like 0:01:15.000 --> 0:01:17.880 that very much. We are joined from West of the 0:01:17.920 --> 0:01:23.720 four oh five. David gascon David Guest, I'm on make 0:01:23.800 --> 0:01:30.560 youth you room or I'm here I get some I 0:01:30.600 --> 0:01:35.160 got some good and breaking news for you on this Saturday. Um. 0:01:35.240 --> 0:01:37.440 You know, we had something that came down a few 0:01:37.520 --> 0:01:39.960 days ago with a certain governor in a certain recall, 0:01:40.440 --> 0:01:43.559 and I am happy to report, which I thought would 0:01:43.600 --> 0:01:46.560 happen and it certainly did, is that the uh l 0:01:46.600 --> 0:01:48.840 A County is now issuing a new health order that 0:01:48.880 --> 0:01:52.680 will require proof of a vaccination for all customers and 0:01:52.760 --> 0:01:59.880 employees for indoor bars, wineries, breweries, nightclubs, and also make 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:04.400 outdoor events like Dodger games, rams games and charges. How 0:02:04.480 --> 0:02:06.960 about that? I mean, who would have thought that would 0:02:07.000 --> 0:02:12.040 have happened after an election? Right? Congratulations? Right there you go. 0:02:12.520 --> 0:02:20.200 That's right, a fucking surprise, right. That is amazing. Okay, 0:02:20.240 --> 0:02:23.119 well listen, that's the the end. It is amazing. Though. 0:02:23.520 --> 0:02:26.840 The amazing thing is that in some places you can 0:02:26.919 --> 0:02:28.680 just go to a game you don't have to show 0:02:28.800 --> 0:02:31.760 any kind of proof that you've had a jab or 0:02:31.760 --> 0:02:34.480 anything like that, and then in other places you can't. 0:02:34.680 --> 0:02:39.119 You can't go anywhere without having the the verification, which 0:02:39.160 --> 0:02:42.680 is going to do a tremendous service for those that 0:02:42.720 --> 0:02:48.200 make counterfeit vaccine cards and things like that. And uh, 0:02:48.280 --> 0:02:50.720 of course there's a database though, So how's this gonna work? 0:02:50.720 --> 0:02:53.239 You have to have your name entered in the database 0:02:53.760 --> 0:02:57.040 or I'm not sure. I'm sure how that all all 0:02:57.080 --> 0:03:00.440 goes down. I don't know. I mean, you think about 0:03:00.440 --> 0:03:03.680 the folks that want to get their DNA checked. Um, 0:03:03.800 --> 0:03:08.040 they'll probably signing up for this as quickly as possible. Um. 0:03:08.120 --> 0:03:12.360 I'm sure protecting DNA you protect at all times. Right, 0:03:12.440 --> 0:03:16.399 you say no to that? That is that is very sacred. 0:03:17.040 --> 0:03:20.720 It's just well, one, I don't need to know where 0:03:20.760 --> 0:03:23.639 I came from. I know where I'm at now. Um, 0:03:23.639 --> 0:03:25.560 I don't need to be digging up people from the past, 0:03:25.639 --> 0:03:28.000 because if they're not here now, then they're not gonna 0:03:28.040 --> 0:03:31.400 be around in the future. Um. Now, what's the out 0:03:31.440 --> 0:03:33.359 of benefit? Right? Like? What am I gonna do put 0:03:33.400 --> 0:03:35.720 something down on a job application? Now? Like am I 0:03:35.720 --> 0:03:39.720 gonna claim like I'm some kind of group or or 0:03:39.720 --> 0:03:42.280 what not? Our ethnicity? Now that I find something out, 0:03:42.320 --> 0:03:44.360 now I get care less. I am who I am. 0:03:44.520 --> 0:03:48.600 I don't need that ship. Come on, man, exactly. It 0:03:49.680 --> 0:03:53.160 both presidents in there today. That's job. Yeah, I've been 0:03:53.200 --> 0:03:55.640 working on my my sound of fake game. I've been 0:03:55.680 --> 0:04:01.000 trying to. Yeah, it's interesting. I don't I don't know 0:04:01.000 --> 0:04:05.200 what that is. But I even got former president. Yeah, 0:04:05.560 --> 0:04:09.839 I got Obama, Biden and Trump nicely done. Yeah, I've 0:04:09.880 --> 0:04:13.040 got I've got everything, you know, So it's uh, get 0:04:13.440 --> 0:04:16.440 you get see you have forty three, forty four and 0:04:16.520 --> 0:04:19.800 forty five, or it's got four, that's right, Yeah, you 0:04:19.839 --> 0:04:25.840 have forty four in a row. I don't have any Bush, 0:04:25.960 --> 0:04:28.680 don't be rude. I'm sorry. I don't have any. Mr President, 0:04:28.720 --> 0:04:32.320 I do not have any there, so we all need 0:04:32.520 --> 0:04:35.040 to laugh. Yes, that's why we're here. That's why we're 0:04:35.080 --> 0:04:37.800 here too. How many people are being triggered right now? Guest? 0:04:37.920 --> 0:04:40.280 And well, I get an email from someone I used 0:04:40.320 --> 0:04:43.520 to listen to your podcast and then you played those 0:04:43.560 --> 0:04:46.240 sound effects and then all of a sudden, I can't 0:04:46.279 --> 0:04:51.680 listen anymore. Probably may maybe, yeah, maybe they'll maybe they'll 0:04:51.720 --> 0:04:54.240 recall you, maybe they'll bring you back into uh to 0:04:54.400 --> 0:04:56.919 the studios at Fox for doing this. That's you know. 0:04:56.960 --> 0:05:00.000 I heard they were bringing employees back there on vacations 0:05:00.000 --> 0:05:04.280 because they were oh yeah, well maybe, I mean some 0:05:04.320 --> 0:05:06.240 people didn't want to work and other people had to 0:05:06.279 --> 0:05:09.800 come in there and it was you know, did you 0:05:10.120 --> 0:05:15.120 did you verbally? Uh? Did you verbally murder Brian Finley 0:05:15.200 --> 0:05:20.159 last week? Um No, I've been seeing my therapist and 0:05:20.320 --> 0:05:23.840 I've been I'm getting a therapy dog and taking my 0:05:23.880 --> 0:05:29.240 meds and so I'm okay, I'm yeah, it's been it's 0:05:29.240 --> 0:05:33.440 been okay, I've gotten over it. Professional professional. I thought 0:05:33.440 --> 0:05:38.400 Ilo was great. I was concerned. I've known Isaac since 0:05:38.440 --> 0:05:40.640 he was in high school, and I know he is 0:05:40.680 --> 0:05:45.560 an old soul. He's very professional. He goes to bed early, uh, 0:05:45.600 --> 0:05:47.320 and I was concerned he wasn't gona play along. We 0:05:47.400 --> 0:05:49.960 liked to goof around in the overnight. But I thought 0:05:50.000 --> 0:05:52.440 Isaac was great and we had a we had a 0:05:52.440 --> 0:05:55.719 good time, had a lot of laughs, and I'm I 0:05:55.800 --> 0:05:59.200 was pleasantly surprised. I thought Isaac did a wonderful job 0:05:59.240 --> 0:06:02.440 filling in and I saw his name on the schedule. 0:06:02.520 --> 0:06:05.679 I was like, whoa wait a minute here, what's going on? 0:06:06.160 --> 0:06:08.760 Did somebody make a mistake here? And then when he 0:06:08.800 --> 0:06:16.080 showed up, pretty cool? Wow? Yeah, I love it. Always 0:06:16.200 --> 0:06:17.760 nice when you're pleasantly see this is the one of 0:06:17.800 --> 0:06:20.000 the advantages guest on you when you always think the 0:06:20.040 --> 0:06:23.560 worst and then you get a pleasant surprise. You're like, wow, 0:06:23.600 --> 0:06:26.240 that was that was just what we needed. Yeah, that 0:06:26.320 --> 0:06:29.280 was outstaying. So I mean, you would you you would 0:06:29.320 --> 0:06:33.200 agree that it's not often. Well, actually, like the ability 0:06:33.279 --> 0:06:36.559 for an anchor during her show to elevate your show 0:06:36.960 --> 0:06:41.520 is not it doesn't that's not high on the on 0:06:41.560 --> 0:06:45.919 the radar, right, Like, well, it's more likely for an 0:06:45.920 --> 0:06:49.000 anchor to torpedo your show, not to elevate it. Well, 0:06:49.040 --> 0:06:52.279 that's been my experience often that that it's uh enemy 0:06:52.360 --> 0:06:56.080 combatant friendly fire. I like to say, I'm often taken 0:06:56.080 --> 0:06:59.080 down by friendly fire. Um, but I go in with 0:06:59.120 --> 0:07:02.760 the high expectations and and hopes that that will not 0:07:02.800 --> 0:07:05.000 be the case. And then eventually I just settle in. 0:07:05.040 --> 0:07:07.800 I'm like, Okay, that's gonna happen, so I'll just kind 0:07:07.800 --> 0:07:10.960 of deal with it. And then, you know, occasionally, very 0:07:11.040 --> 0:07:14.520 rarely do I just completely lose lose all sense of reality. 0:07:14.560 --> 0:07:17.320 But typically when you give first round tennis scores of 0:07:17.360 --> 0:07:20.240 people no one has heard the funk of that normally 0:07:20.240 --> 0:07:22.760 triggers me. That normally gets me. That's that is a 0:07:23.000 --> 0:07:26.000 pet peeve of mind, and that sends me sadeways. So 0:07:26.080 --> 0:07:31.000 on this Saturday podcast, we have a exclusive story that 0:07:31.080 --> 0:07:35.160 I have saved for the podcast, uh called Swat. It's 0:07:35.200 --> 0:07:39.920 called Swat and Man of the People. I also got 0:07:39.960 --> 0:07:41.880 a very before we get it all that I just 0:07:41.960 --> 0:07:45.960 remembered here. I had a very unique cameo experience. And 0:07:46.000 --> 0:07:49.280 I'm gonna say this before before I get into to 0:07:49.400 --> 0:07:53.840 the full cameo story. I love doing the cameos, and 0:07:54.160 --> 0:07:56.880 you know that sporadically they pop up every so often 0:07:56.920 --> 0:08:00.000 the big fan of the show wants to have something unique, 0:08:00.080 --> 0:08:02.760 can and do the cameo, and I think it's great 0:08:02.840 --> 0:08:07.040 and wonderful. I'm on cameo dot com Ben Maller, but 0:08:07.640 --> 0:08:09.440 if I can please, if you're planning on doing that, 0:08:09.480 --> 0:08:11.080 you don't have to do it. It's fine, you know 0:08:11.120 --> 0:08:13.360 some of some of you guys have done it for 0:08:13.400 --> 0:08:15.560 a few people. It's tradition, like once a year, I'll 0:08:15.600 --> 0:08:17.720 do a cameo for you, and I love doing it. 0:08:17.960 --> 0:08:21.000 But all right, little pet Peeve here, no the pet Peeve. 0:08:21.240 --> 0:08:25.240 So if you're gonna do a cameo, I beg of 0:08:25.320 --> 0:08:28.680 you to go on cameo dot com and book there 0:08:29.120 --> 0:08:32.600 and I'll tell you why because if you buy on 0:08:33.240 --> 0:08:35.600 if you have an iPhone and you're buying the app store, 0:08:35.800 --> 0:08:39.199 Apple takes let me, let me hold us, let me 0:08:39.240 --> 0:08:40.760 look at the math here. Guess I gotta go to 0:08:40.760 --> 0:08:42.680 my I'm gonna go to the phones on this hold 0:08:42.640 --> 0:08:45.160 on to stake here. Let's see if I can get 0:08:45.160 --> 0:08:49.920 this up real quick, because the percentage that is shaved 0:08:49.960 --> 0:08:58.720 off the top is insane. It is absolutely mansion live 0:08:58.800 --> 0:09:01.640 here on the podcast. I'm going to the going to 0:09:01.679 --> 0:09:04.960 the Cameo app, which I have on my phone, and 0:09:05.240 --> 0:09:09.760 I am alright, let's see. Oh yeah, here's the breakdown. 0:09:09.920 --> 0:09:14.520 So when you if you buy a cameo on the regular, 0:09:16.000 --> 0:09:19.600 like the most people use the app, Apple takes thirty 0:09:20.320 --> 0:09:28.120 off the top. Yes, they shave uh. Cameo then takes 0:09:28.160 --> 0:09:31.280 so now I don't cameo or whatever they take, but 0:09:31.400 --> 0:09:34.360 the thirty percent where if you if you the same cameo, 0:09:34.400 --> 0:09:36.720 if you get it on cameo dot com, they don't 0:09:36.720 --> 0:09:41.040 take thet percent. It's just and you know how I 0:09:41.160 --> 0:09:43.920 learned that, and I gotta set it up. We're having 0:09:43.960 --> 0:09:46.040 downe on my my phone. But there was a guy 0:09:46.080 --> 0:09:50.240 on the office, you know, the uh, the one of 0:09:50.280 --> 0:09:53.320 the assistants I forget the guy's name. Uh, and I 0:09:53.320 --> 0:09:55.439 don't know how else to describe him other than he's 0:09:55.480 --> 0:09:59.240 African American. Kinda is a meme of the guy. You know, 0:09:59.280 --> 0:10:02.320 the actor I'm talking talking about, kind of an older guy, 0:10:02.400 --> 0:10:05.640 middle aged guy. Older guy, got a very distinctive face, 0:10:06.720 --> 0:10:08.199 you know what I'm talking about. I don't remember the 0:10:08.200 --> 0:10:10.000 guy's name. I'd say his name. I remember his name. 0:10:10.040 --> 0:10:11.840 I'm not good with names and actors. I don't know 0:10:12.400 --> 0:10:17.040 the voice. Uh. He's the guy you know, he had 0:10:17.080 --> 0:10:19.560 the famous like his eye roll, kind of like his 0:10:19.720 --> 0:10:23.040 disheveled face look where he kind of he's very charismatic 0:10:23.160 --> 0:10:26.480 with his face. But it does not important. So that 0:10:26.520 --> 0:10:31.319 guy's on cameo and he had on his page he 0:10:31.400 --> 0:10:34.080 is unavailable unless you book on cameo dot com. So 0:10:34.280 --> 0:10:37.400 that guy, he's like he figured it out. He's like, hey, listen, 0:10:37.400 --> 0:10:40.760 I'm only gonna do it this way. Um, but no 0:10:40.880 --> 0:10:46.480 I did. I did a cameo for Auzzy Momentum, and 0:10:46.520 --> 0:10:48.960 he wanted me to give advice to a buddy of 0:10:49.040 --> 0:10:51.679 his who It's always weird because I don't know if 0:10:51.679 --> 0:10:53.760 this other person knows who I am. And I'm as 0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:57.280 odd and uh, and I had to, like, you know, 0:10:57.360 --> 0:10:59.680 talk some azzy rules football. So I did at AUSSI 0:10:59.760 --> 0:11:02.920 rules hot Assy rules football talk a little bit of that, 0:11:03.080 --> 0:11:06.840 did some recon on the assy rules football, but it 0:11:06.920 --> 0:11:09.240 was it was cool. So cameo dot com I am 0:11:09.400 --> 0:11:12.480 I am available, and it'll sound better than before because 0:11:12.520 --> 0:11:16.720 before I had that that shitty podcast studio and now 0:11:16.800 --> 0:11:20.640 all of a sudden, it's uh, first class all the way. 0:11:20.679 --> 0:11:23.400 I got a sound effect here. I mean, come on, 0:11:23.640 --> 0:11:27.040 even Brittany over their loves that's right, she's a fan. 0:11:27.200 --> 0:11:32.080 She can't. Oh my god. All right, So the the 0:11:32.200 --> 0:11:36.520 swat story here gascon. So this being the fifth hour, 0:11:36.559 --> 0:11:39.000 I try to save some of said some the life 0:11:39.000 --> 0:11:41.599 of Mallark, the life of Mallard on the on the 0:11:41.640 --> 0:11:45.760 Saturday podcast. So I have put aside this particular story, 0:11:45.800 --> 0:11:47.240 which is a pretty good source one of the more 0:11:47.280 --> 0:11:49.640 interesting things that's ever happened to me in my life. 0:11:50.600 --> 0:11:53.400 In my life, something like this had never happened before. 0:11:53.440 --> 0:11:57.319 So last weekend I found myself I don't even tell 0:11:57.320 --> 0:11:58.760 you about this. I didn't even tell you about this. 0:11:58.800 --> 0:12:01.040 I didn't text you don't even know about this. So 0:12:01.080 --> 0:12:03.600 I found myself in my old stomping grounds in South 0:12:03.679 --> 0:12:07.199 Orange County. Now, I went to the Holy Land at 0:12:07.240 --> 0:12:11.760 Saddleback College where the radio thing started, and I happened 0:12:11.760 --> 0:12:14.680 to be in the area. And first of all, my wife. 0:12:14.800 --> 0:12:16.920 When we were out, it was about it was Saturday night. 0:12:16.920 --> 0:12:18.720 My wife said, hey, I wanna eat some Italian food. 0:12:18.760 --> 0:12:22.880 She had found a place that she liked online, and 0:12:23.000 --> 0:12:26.960 so we made the sojourn to this Italian place in 0:12:27.120 --> 0:12:31.160 South Orange County to get our usual my fetucchini alfredo 0:12:31.240 --> 0:12:33.839 with chicken palm. That's what I go to when I 0:12:33.920 --> 0:12:36.080 go to at the restaurant. So pull up to this 0:12:36.160 --> 0:12:38.800 Italian joint and we get out of the car and 0:12:38.800 --> 0:12:41.319 we walked into the restaurant and we realized that we're 0:12:41.320 --> 0:12:44.000 not allowed to eat at the restaurant because it's a 0:12:44.040 --> 0:12:47.440 private event. They had closed the entire restaurant for some 0:12:47.520 --> 0:12:50.240 dude's birthday party. Imagine how much money that guy must 0:12:50.240 --> 0:12:53.800 have had the top on a Saturday night must have 0:12:53.800 --> 0:12:57.520 been an insane amount of money. So fine, So we 0:12:57.520 --> 0:12:59.960 were left scrambling and then you know, suddenly my wife's like, okay, 0:13:00.040 --> 0:13:03.000 we'll improvise, and she said, well, it's getting late and 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:07.000 we haven't eaten and so let's go to the Cheesecake Factor. 0:13:07.920 --> 0:13:12.680 And it's good food, big portions, open openly, all good qualities, 0:13:12.679 --> 0:13:15.240 all good qualities for a restaurant. So we traveled to 0:13:15.280 --> 0:13:19.199 this place. And if you're you've been in South Orange County, 0:13:19.600 --> 0:13:22.120 if you're listening in the area, it's called the shops 0:13:22.120 --> 0:13:25.480 at Mission Viejo. Now, when I went to saddle Back, 0:13:25.520 --> 0:13:27.880 it was the Mission Villa Home Mall, but they changed 0:13:27.920 --> 0:13:30.120 the name. It's the same same thing, it's just get 0:13:30.160 --> 0:13:32.960 a different name. So we went to Cheesecake Factory, parked 0:13:32.960 --> 0:13:35.120 the car whatever, normal thing, get into the restaurant, have 0:13:35.160 --> 0:13:37.439 to wait about ten fifteen minutes for a table. Table 0:13:37.480 --> 0:13:40.280 hopens up. We go in, We order appetized, order drinks, 0:13:41.120 --> 0:13:43.400 ordered pretzel bites. I remember what we ordered, pretzel bites 0:13:43.440 --> 0:13:47.559 with the cheese fondue. Very good, very good, little over price, 0:13:47.640 --> 0:13:50.920 but pretty good, delicious. So then we order the main course. 0:13:50.920 --> 0:13:52.840 Now I decided to change it up. Normally I go 0:13:52.920 --> 0:13:56.760 to to uh this restaurant, Cheesecake Factor. I get the chicken, 0:13:56.800 --> 0:13:59.839 the Cajun chicken. Little but I said I'll change it 0:13:59.920 --> 0:14:03.280 up and I got the chicken bellagio with pestel says 0:14:03.800 --> 0:14:07.800 solid alternative, pretty good meal. And so we're waiting for 0:14:07.840 --> 0:14:09.680 the main event. We're waiting for the meal to come, 0:14:09.920 --> 0:14:13.600 and we see some cops pull up outside the mall 0:14:13.960 --> 0:14:16.800 in front of the restaurant. We think nothing of it, right, 0:14:16.800 --> 0:14:20.240 I think whatever. Uh. Then more cops show up, and 0:14:20.280 --> 0:14:22.960 again we're like, we're eating, We're not really paying any 0:14:22.960 --> 0:14:25.840 attention to that. Eventually we hear some chatter among the 0:14:25.840 --> 0:14:29.280 waite staff. They're whispering to each other in hush tones, 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:32.160 and there are people huddling up like they're in the NFL. 0:14:33.280 --> 0:14:35.240 And at that point we're like, well, something must be 0:14:35.240 --> 0:14:40.120 going on. And then the manager came over and said 0:14:40.120 --> 0:14:43.960 that there had been an incident in the mall and 0:14:44.040 --> 0:14:47.440 that they would be closing early and that we had 0:14:47.480 --> 0:14:53.000 to leave immediately. Um, and we hadn't gotten our food yet, 0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:57.360 and the order was turned into a dego order. So 0:14:57.400 --> 0:15:05.040 there's more noise, there's more hullabaloo outside. So I'm I'm 0:15:05.120 --> 0:15:06.960 scrambling around trying to figure out what's going on. I'm 0:15:06.960 --> 0:15:09.920 on my my phone, I'm on Twitter, searching around trying 0:15:09.920 --> 0:15:11.840 to figure out what's going on here? Is there's something 0:15:11.920 --> 0:15:15.760 that really big going on? So the manager comes over 0:15:15.960 --> 0:15:19.120 from cheesecake factory and says that, hey, listen, I'm sorry 0:15:19.120 --> 0:15:21.480 about this. All the food you order, We're gonna give 0:15:21.480 --> 0:15:23.080 you the food because it's already being made, but you 0:15:23.120 --> 0:15:25.040 don't have to pay for it. So I'm like, all right, 0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:27.440 this is great. So I finally I find on Twitter 0:15:28.320 --> 0:15:33.320 that the there was a person that had walked around 0:15:33.360 --> 0:15:36.920 them all with a gun and an orange wig and 0:15:37.080 --> 0:15:41.720 was loose in the mall. Wow. Um and so so anyway, 0:15:42.160 --> 0:15:43.760 so I'm like, okay, we'll just get out of your 0:15:43.760 --> 0:15:45.960 no problem. It's probably not that big a deal whatever. 0:15:46.280 --> 0:15:49.440 Um and so, but then I was I was leaving. 0:15:50.040 --> 0:15:53.360 We we grabbed the food, and the manager who had 0:15:53.400 --> 0:15:58.000 said hey, foods on us, sorry about this, you know. Uh, 0:15:58.040 --> 0:15:59.520 they did the old bait and switch, like no, you 0:15:59.560 --> 0:16:03.120 gotta pay for the food. And unfortunately my wife was 0:16:03.160 --> 0:16:04.800 the one dealing with this because she paid for it. 0:16:04.840 --> 0:16:06.040 I would not have paid for it. I would have 0:16:06.040 --> 0:16:07.920 been like, no, I'm not paying for that. Um, they're 0:16:07.960 --> 0:16:10.920 not eating it. I'm out here. So anyway, we get 0:16:10.920 --> 0:16:14.840 out of the restaurant surrounded by and like it was 0:16:14.880 --> 0:16:18.040 a demilitarized zone and I'm not making this up like 0:16:18.160 --> 0:16:20.640 we had a very short walk to the to the malomobile. 0:16:21.280 --> 0:16:24.520 There was a swat unit of ten or fifteen dudes, 0:16:25.280 --> 0:16:29.840 full body armor, high powered assault weapons, and they were 0:16:29.920 --> 0:16:35.120 walking past us in a military order into the mall 0:16:36.320 --> 0:16:41.000 and uh it to leave. We had our car search. 0:16:41.040 --> 0:16:43.640 They opened up the trunk of the car to see 0:16:43.680 --> 0:16:45.520 if they were worried that the person was hiding in 0:16:45.560 --> 0:16:48.520 the car one of the cars leaving the mall, and 0:16:48.560 --> 0:16:50.040 you know, the good news and nobody got hurt. It 0:16:50.040 --> 0:16:53.000 turns out that some punk pulled on and you know, 0:16:53.120 --> 0:16:55.680 a gun and robbed there was a nord strooms in 0:16:55.720 --> 0:16:58.400 the mall and robbed and then fled into the mall. 0:16:59.160 --> 0:17:00.800 And they didn't know where the guy was, and so 0:17:00.840 --> 0:17:02.720 they were worried that he was blending in with the 0:17:02.760 --> 0:17:05.639 people at that you know, She's factory or wherever. And 0:17:05.640 --> 0:17:07.119 they were worried that the guy was going to do 0:17:07.200 --> 0:17:10.239 something with a gun. And so it's pretty crazy night, 0:17:10.600 --> 0:17:12.359 Pretty wild. Now. I did not eat. I started my 0:17:12.440 --> 0:17:15.560 fast early in protest. I did not eat my chicken bellagio. 0:17:15.960 --> 0:17:19.560 So just where were you on the mallard scale of panic? 0:17:21.280 --> 0:17:24.280 I was not that My wife was, you know, she 0:17:24.400 --> 0:17:26.800 worked at the police station and nine one one opera, 0:17:26.920 --> 0:17:29.440 so for her, she's she does this kind of stuff. 0:17:29.440 --> 0:17:30.840 And she was like a little freaked out, which because 0:17:30.840 --> 0:17:33.120 we didn't know early on what was going on. When 0:17:33.119 --> 0:17:35.800 you hear somebody's got an orange wig and a gun, 0:17:35.880 --> 0:17:38.800 this is one night eleven, so your your mind starts 0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:42.040 putting things together like, well, wait a minute, eleven, this 0:17:42.080 --> 0:17:43.879 is an important day. Is this guy, you know, some 0:17:43.960 --> 0:17:46.800 kind of a lunatic. Uh, he's got some kind of 0:17:46.840 --> 0:17:50.600 neurosis or something, so you don't know. And I was 0:17:50.760 --> 0:17:52.520 all right. My wife was like trying to get me 0:17:52.560 --> 0:17:55.200 to not standing from the windows or anything like that. 0:17:55.240 --> 0:17:58.080 They were in the restaurant. It wasn't until I walked 0:17:58.119 --> 0:18:01.680 out and turned the corner and aw the SWAT unit 0:18:01.760 --> 0:18:06.119 walking in that I thought, holy fuck, this is uh, 0:18:06.160 --> 0:18:10.920 this is something, this is something more than I yes, yeah, yeah, 0:18:11.000 --> 0:18:13.399 I mean it's pretty wild. And the police did a 0:18:13.400 --> 0:18:16.159 great job. They were wonderful and very nice and all that, 0:18:16.240 --> 0:18:21.080 and out of they have to take every precaution they can. 0:18:21.480 --> 0:18:26.719 I get it. So that was my I didn't eat 0:18:26.720 --> 0:18:28.560 the food my I had my wife eeded at work 0:18:28.680 --> 0:18:32.480 for leftovers. I did not like it. I think she 0:18:32.480 --> 0:18:35.400 she enjoyed it, although she she did say it tasted better. 0:18:35.560 --> 0:18:36.800 You know, if you would eat it right away, it 0:18:36.800 --> 0:18:40.920 would have tasted much better. So damn, that's that's the 0:18:40.920 --> 0:18:43.880 the story. They're also a man of the people now 0:18:44.160 --> 0:18:46.840 real quick. Every once in a while, every once in 0:18:46.880 --> 0:18:51.040 a while I beg for help gascon from the Mallard militia, 0:18:51.640 --> 0:18:55.639 and they never have disappointed. Years ago, I am. I 0:18:55.680 --> 0:18:57.119 told the story the other night on the radio. So 0:18:57.119 --> 0:19:00.840 I had an aunt infestation. The you the old Mallard 0:19:00.880 --> 0:19:04.360 mansion was infested with these little ants. I couldn't get 0:19:04.440 --> 0:19:06.560 rid of them, these bastards for the life of me, 0:19:07.560 --> 0:19:09.439 And so I said, I need help. Does anyone have 0:19:09.480 --> 0:19:12.840 any suggestions? And I had multiple listeners that recommended the 0:19:13.000 --> 0:19:17.560 same device that I have used. This is many years 0:19:17.560 --> 0:19:20.320 ago and I still use it to this day. Anytime 0:19:20.359 --> 0:19:23.080 I see those little ants crawling around, I go to 0:19:23.080 --> 0:19:25.960 go to home Depot or Lows and I buy these 0:19:26.240 --> 0:19:29.119 Tero liquid ant traps. You ever use those things? Amazing? 0:19:29.680 --> 0:19:33.280 They're great and with boos and and now that came 0:19:33.320 --> 0:19:36.800 from Ald what what do you what do you laughing? 0:19:37.440 --> 0:19:42.000 Just it's like very um like what prompted this to 0:19:42.080 --> 0:19:44.720 be called the like what caused this to to reach 0:19:44.760 --> 0:19:48.200 out to the Mallar militia. Well, I had a problem 0:19:48.200 --> 0:19:49.879 and I was talking about the fact that I couldn't 0:19:49.880 --> 0:19:52.119 get rid of ants, and I said, anybody have any ideas, 0:19:52.160 --> 0:19:54.160 and then some members of the Mala Musha reached out. 0:19:54.280 --> 0:19:56.240 I know, but was this like was this like festering 0:19:56.280 --> 0:19:58.760 for a while or did it just all like coming 0:19:58.840 --> 0:20:01.480 an onslaught and he said need help right now. No, 0:20:01.640 --> 0:20:03.439 it had been a problem for a while, so I 0:20:04.840 --> 0:20:07.439 needed some help and people help me out. And that 0:20:07.560 --> 0:20:09.760 was years ago. And I very rarely do that. I 0:20:09.800 --> 0:20:12.639 don't use the bully pulpit inappropriately, but people like to 0:20:12.640 --> 0:20:15.760 help people. One thing I've learned is that if you 0:20:15.800 --> 0:20:18.760 can give advice to another person, you've done a great mitzvah. 0:20:18.880 --> 0:20:20.880 If you can give someone a tip, a little life 0:20:20.880 --> 0:20:23.640 hack to make their life easier, that's great. You feel better, 0:20:23.680 --> 0:20:27.200 they feel better. That's a win win in the current goodwill, 0:20:27.840 --> 0:20:29.879 You're doing very well any kind of It's like you 0:20:29.920 --> 0:20:31.919 help young people out, you know people, you know, if 0:20:31.920 --> 0:20:33.520 I could help somebody, I wants to be in radio 0:20:33.560 --> 0:20:35.560 and give them a little point point them in the 0:20:35.640 --> 0:20:40.040 right direction. I would love to do it. So anyway, Um, 0:20:40.080 --> 0:20:42.520 moving on. So I recently moved to the Mallard Mansion 0:20:43.119 --> 0:20:48.160 two point oh in the north Woods, and ever since 0:20:48.160 --> 0:20:51.080 I moved, I have been red meat in a hungry 0:20:51.119 --> 0:20:57.240 lions then, but not for lions, for those flying pieces 0:20:57.280 --> 0:21:05.119 of shit, those mosquitoes. I am convinced that my blood 0:21:05.680 --> 0:21:09.639 is the nectar of the gods. Every time I go 0:21:09.720 --> 0:21:14.920 out of the Mallard Mansion, the mosquitoes eat me. It's over, 0:21:15.200 --> 0:21:18.480 It's I'm done. It's just does not work. I'm covered 0:21:18.520 --> 0:21:22.800 in bites my right around, my knees, my elbows, my 0:21:22.800 --> 0:21:28.439 my forearms, my neck. Uh, it is terrible. This invasion 0:21:28.520 --> 0:21:32.720 has no end. So I finally reached my breaking point 0:21:33.040 --> 0:21:38.080 and I just said, okay, shut up. Yes, And so 0:21:38.119 --> 0:21:41.120 what I did was I I said I need help. 0:21:41.800 --> 0:21:43.760 I put a call to arms, out to the Mallam 0:21:43.800 --> 0:21:47.080 militia for help. And as a man of the people, 0:21:48.320 --> 0:21:50.520 uh endless suggesting. I got a ton of Twitter, I 0:21:50.520 --> 0:21:54.240 got a bunch of email people posting stuff. I'm giving 0:21:54.240 --> 0:22:00.120 me advice. And now the problem I have, Gaston is 0:22:01.080 --> 0:22:04.800 it's too much. It's like paralysis by analysis. Now because 0:22:04.840 --> 0:22:08.000 I've got a guy in Minnesota. The guy lives near 0:22:08.000 --> 0:22:10.520 the Canadian border, I believe in in northern Minnesota, and 0:22:10.560 --> 0:22:13.280 he sent me these things like three d bucks but 0:22:13.400 --> 0:22:15.840 it will last for twenty one days and it's it's 0:22:15.920 --> 0:22:19.240 using the same thing you would use the light a barbecue, 0:22:19.640 --> 0:22:23.040 um as a it's got a big tank on it. Uh. 0:22:23.119 --> 0:22:26.399 Then there's other people that one guy said his wife 0:22:27.160 --> 0:22:30.639 had the same problem and she started taking a garlic supplement, 0:22:30.680 --> 0:22:36.280 a garlic pill, and the mosquito stopped biting her. So 0:22:36.320 --> 0:22:39.240 there was that there was somebody else that recommended a 0:22:39.320 --> 0:22:43.720 garlic spray that you can spray around the yard and mosquitoes. 0:22:43.720 --> 0:22:46.680 There's an old wives tale that mosquitoes do not like garlic, 0:22:47.480 --> 0:22:51.399