1
00:00:00,880 --> 00:00:05,720
Speaker 1: This is How Men Think? And Gavin and I heard

2
00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:10,119
Speaker 1: radio podcasts Everybody Thought, bar Bosha b A. Milla, hosts

3
00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:14,440
Speaker 1: of American Ninja Warrior. Uh. I'm filling in for Brooks

4
00:00:14,440 --> 00:00:17,840
Speaker 1: and Gavin. I am now the guest host of How

5
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:21,400
Speaker 1: Men Think. And this podcast is so interesting to me

6
00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:25,360
Speaker 1: because it really does do a deep dive into our

7
00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,280
Speaker 1: thought process. And today part of that thought process is

8
00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:33,160
Speaker 1: going to be Alfonso Rivieriro and good friend Jerry O'Connell. Uh.

9
00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:37,360
Speaker 1: Not to mention, we have some help the supernanny Joe Frost.

10
00:00:37,560 --> 00:00:40,560
Speaker 1: She's in UH today and we're gonna have a discussion

11
00:00:40,600 --> 00:00:44,000
Speaker 1: on how to adjust to the new normal, especially at home,

12
00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:47,920
Speaker 1: UH with school coming back into play back to school.

13
00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:51,239
Speaker 1: Everyone's excited. What does that look like? I'm interested. I've

14
00:00:51,280 --> 00:00:53,920
Speaker 1: got four kids of my own. I know Jerry's got

15
00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:57,040
Speaker 1: his kids, Alfonso's got his kids. What do we do?

16
00:00:57,160 --> 00:00:59,400
Speaker 1: How are we doing it? We're gonna hear from them shortly.

17
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:02,960
Speaker 1: It Right now, let's bring in my two good friends,

18
00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:16,840
Speaker 1: Jerry O'Connell and Alfonso. Jerry, Dude, what's up, Alfonso? How

19
00:01:16,920 --> 00:01:19,920
Speaker 1: you doing? Brother? I'm doing good man. I feel like

20
00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:21,720
Speaker 1: you just came off the golf course. I think every

21
00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:24,480
Speaker 1: time I see you're always golf think I listen, I've

22
00:01:24,520 --> 00:01:27,480
Speaker 1: actually I haven't even been to my golf course in

23
00:01:28,720 --> 00:01:31,479
Speaker 1: two and a half months. Oh is that right? Yeah,

24
00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:34,600
Speaker 1: because I mean, why is that. Well we'll get into

25
00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:37,039
Speaker 1: that during the interview, but I went, I've been all

26
00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:40,360
Speaker 1: over the country in my RV and haven't played really

27
00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:43,399
Speaker 1: any golf at home. I'm actually gonna go tomorrow for

28
00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:46,480
Speaker 1: the first time in over two and a half months

29
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:48,160
Speaker 1: to play golf. I'm gonna take my boy with me.

30
00:01:48,680 --> 00:01:51,000
Speaker 1: Oh that's good, all right, Well, that's good. May happen

31
00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:52,920
Speaker 1: having a little bit of fun out there, Jerry? What

32
00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:57,880
Speaker 1: about you? Nothing? I actually, um, I am taking golf lessons.

33
00:01:57,920 --> 00:01:59,920
Speaker 1: I'll be ready. I'm trying to get myself ready for

34
00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:02,160
Speaker 1: or when I go out with Alfonso, and I don't

35
00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:06,680
Speaker 1: embarrass myself totally when I'm out there. But nothing, man,

36
00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:10,920
Speaker 1: just sitting at home watching you on Instagram, watching me

37
00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:14,800
Speaker 1: on Instagram. Well look, let's dive right into this. You know, uh,

38
00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:17,400
Speaker 1: everyone kind of you know, knows that school is getting

39
00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:21,160
Speaker 1: ready to come back in and people often how what's

40
00:02:21,200 --> 00:02:25,040
Speaker 1: this new normal look like? For especially for fathers um

41
00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:27,000
Speaker 1: and for you to look, you guys are big time,

42
00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:29,480
Speaker 1: prime time celebrities. I gotta just ask you guys, straight

43
00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:32,000
Speaker 1: off the top. Do you guys cook at home? I

44
00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:34,880
Speaker 1: know you know, Alfonso, you've been in and out r

45
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:41,400
Speaker 1: V at home. Are you guys cooking at home? Um? No, no, no,

46
00:02:42,080 --> 00:02:45,000
Speaker 1: um when I've been home. But to you know, I'm

47
00:02:45,080 --> 00:02:48,079
Speaker 1: really good at breakfast, so I'll do breakfast. Breakfast is

48
00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:50,320
Speaker 1: something that I can do, but my wife is so

49
00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:53,400
Speaker 1: much better at it that my kids. If I actually

50
00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:58,240
Speaker 1: say I'm making breakfast, I hear the all like you know, like, well,

51
00:02:58,280 --> 00:02:59,679
Speaker 1: I gotta feel that way. But every once in a

52
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:01,520
Speaker 1: while I give my wife a break and she doesn't

53
00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:03,000
Speaker 1: want to, you know, she stays in bed a little

54
00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:05,080
Speaker 1: longer with the baby, and and I'll come down and

55
00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:07,680
Speaker 1: cook for the boys. And it's like, you know, I'm eggs,

56
00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:13,960
Speaker 1: maybe a little turkey bacon, you know, just basic, basic, basic,

57
00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:17,639
Speaker 1: No turkey bacon, turkey bacon. But what about pancakes. Yeah,

58
00:03:17,720 --> 00:03:20,480
Speaker 1: my wife does the pancakes. My wife, My wife does pancakes.

59
00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:23,839
Speaker 1: She does the Swedish pancakes, is a regular pancakes. She

60
00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:26,320
Speaker 1: does the pancake. So the kids really like the pancakes.

61
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,240
Speaker 1: I can do. I can do French toast. Okay, but good.

62
00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:32,600
Speaker 1: You know they're not really into it as much. So

63
00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,200
Speaker 1: so yeah, So I don't do a lot of the cooking.

64
00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:37,160
Speaker 1: My wife does most of it. But um, during during

65
00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:40,000
Speaker 1: this pandemic, we've been doing it in our r V

66
00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:44,040
Speaker 1: in different cities all over the country. So she's had

67
00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:48,720
Speaker 1: to really up the quick RV cooking game, right, Like

68
00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:50,880
Speaker 1: you don't want to cook for an hour in the

69
00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:54,120
Speaker 1: r V, you don't really get you know, super specific

70
00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:57,920
Speaker 1: and start getting creative. It's like, okay, what are the basics?

71
00:03:58,120 --> 00:04:01,360
Speaker 1: What can we eat? What's quite? And she rocks it

72
00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:04,600
Speaker 1: out right. So the bob Evans, you know, mac and

73
00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:08,120
Speaker 1: cheese and and and mash potatoes have been great for

74
00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:11,520
Speaker 1: us because she can knock it out. Me. Yeah, no,

75
00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:15,280
Speaker 1: not so much. I know too, You're you're on that

76
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:19,120
Speaker 1: bob Evans stuff too, Jerry, Listen. I know I know

77
00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:22,400
Speaker 1: you're asking about our our culinary skills at bar because

78
00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:24,800
Speaker 1: I do follow you on social media and if I recall,

79
00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:28,520
Speaker 1: you posted a recipe for your vegan pancakes a couple

80
00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:33,039
Speaker 1: of years ago. I recall, um, they looked amazing. I

81
00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:35,400
Speaker 1: unlike you. I'm not very good in the kitchen. Hence

82
00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:38,479
Speaker 1: why I think Bob Evans and I work so well together.

83
00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:42,000
Speaker 1: They are ready to eat all real ingredients. I popped

84
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:45,279
Speaker 1: them in the microwave, and my children have mac and cheese,

85
00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:48,440
Speaker 1: mashed potatoes boom right there. Because I am now now

86
00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:52,680
Speaker 1: that they're distance learning, I am now their cafeteria chef,

87
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:55,200
Speaker 1: so I'm in charge of their school. So you just

88
00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:57,560
Speaker 1: you look it up with the Bob Evans in the

89
00:04:57,720 --> 00:05:00,320
Speaker 1: boom boom boom, and they go, hey, guys, now get

90
00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:05,360
Speaker 1: back to your zoom class. Exactly. It's um, it's it's

91
00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:08,600
Speaker 1: it's just so easy for me. And also I'm ashamed

92
00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:12,800
Speaker 1: to admit I am not the vegan pancake culinary expert

93
00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:15,760
Speaker 1: that you are a far you well, no judgment. It

94
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:19,080
Speaker 1: sounds great. I'm hungry too right now, and that sounds great.

95
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:22,400
Speaker 1: You might actually convert me. Well, my wife, my wife

96
00:05:22,520 --> 00:05:26,040
Speaker 1: is of Swedish heritage, so she makes the Swedish pancakes also,

97
00:05:26,839 --> 00:05:29,000
Speaker 1: and so she rolls them up with the butter and

98
00:05:29,160 --> 00:05:31,960
Speaker 1: little powdered sugar on there. So there's and then we'll

99
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:34,680
Speaker 1: make them make the regular pancakes. Will make banana pancakes.

100
00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:37,880
Speaker 1: Will make blueberry banana pancakes, so she she rocks it

101
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:43,119
Speaker 1: out me. The Swede panca. I've never heard of that before.

102
00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:48,360
Speaker 1: The pcakes. The Swediest pancakes are like paper thin, so

103
00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:50,320
Speaker 1: you actually need a grittle to make it all. You

104
00:05:50,320 --> 00:05:51,600
Speaker 1: can't make them in a pan or anything like that.

105
00:05:51,640 --> 00:05:55,080
Speaker 1: You gotta need a full griddle. And you make them.

106
00:05:55,160 --> 00:05:58,279
Speaker 1: She makes a gluten free one and it's like super

107
00:05:58,279 --> 00:06:00,880
Speaker 1: paper thin and you roll them up. Um, you can

108
00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:04,400
Speaker 1: put it's like a create. It's basically like a crepe,

109
00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:07,120
Speaker 1: except of a pancake, and so it tastes a little

110
00:06:07,120 --> 00:06:09,640
Speaker 1: different than a create. Create doesn't really have the flavor.

111
00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:13,760
Speaker 1: Where do they still have some of that flavor? Well,

112
00:06:13,839 --> 00:06:16,120
Speaker 1: look for all the listeners. For those of you guys

113
00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:20,000
Speaker 1: who actually want to get more information on Bob Evans Farm,

114
00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:22,280
Speaker 1: you guys can go and find that information on bob

115
00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:25,720
Speaker 1: Evans Grocery dot com. Um, I'm sure people are going

116
00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:29,400
Speaker 1: there right now. That sounds pretty good. We're talking about fatherhood,

117
00:06:29,560 --> 00:06:32,280
Speaker 1: you know, and fatherhood has been challenging, I know, at

118
00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:35,280
Speaker 1: least for me because you know with four kids funds.

119
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:38,039
Speaker 1: I know you have four. I've got twins Jerry, I

120
00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:41,839
Speaker 1: know you've got twins. What's been the adjustment, um or

121
00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:44,960
Speaker 1: the biggest adjustment you guys have had to make during

122
00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:47,479
Speaker 1: this time, because I think especially I know, you know,

123
00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:49,320
Speaker 1: husband and wives can kind of go at each other.

124
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:52,800
Speaker 1: For me personal story, in the first two or three weeks,

125
00:06:52,839 --> 00:06:56,880
Speaker 1: I was like super Dad, trying to do everything, and

126
00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:59,600
Speaker 1: then after a while I just was like and I

127
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:02,880
Speaker 1: just hey, maybe yeah, you take this because it was hectic.

128
00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:04,680
Speaker 1: I didn't know what to do. And so now preparing

129
00:07:04,680 --> 00:07:06,880
Speaker 1: for the new school year, I'm trying to come up

130
00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:08,480
Speaker 1: with some more plans, but I wanted to hear kind

131
00:07:08,480 --> 00:07:10,120
Speaker 1: of some of you guys plans on how you're gonna

132
00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:14,120
Speaker 1: just for this new staying at home and distant learning. Well,

133
00:07:14,160 --> 00:07:17,559
Speaker 1: I'm I'm actually one of those people that I view life.

134
00:07:18,040 --> 00:07:21,200
Speaker 1: I'm very mental about life, right, So what I'm always

135
00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:24,240
Speaker 1: trying to do is recognize, Okay, this is our new normal.

136
00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:29,840
Speaker 1: Let's figure out how we do this for the long distance. Right.

137
00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:32,680
Speaker 1: So I'm not gonna be the guy who comes in

138
00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:35,160
Speaker 1: and goes I am super Dad for two weeks and

139
00:07:35,160 --> 00:07:38,360
Speaker 1: now I'm out. Um. I I want to be, you know,

140
00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:43,520
Speaker 1: a stable, steady flow through the summer through all of this, um,

141
00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:45,960
Speaker 1: and so my wife and I have agreed that I

142
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,600
Speaker 1: think the best way to do that is to find

143
00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:51,520
Speaker 1: the things that we do and keep a normal pattern

144
00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:56,960
Speaker 1: every day so it doesn't feel very different. Then eventually,

145
00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,920
Speaker 1: once we reached the point where that was, you know,

146
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,720
Speaker 1: two and a half months old, we then said, all right,

147
00:08:01,760 --> 00:08:03,840
Speaker 1: we need to switch this up and we bought an RV.

148
00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:08,680
Speaker 1: So we bought the r V and went out. Basically,

149
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:16,720
Speaker 1: I've driven over twelve thousand miles. Dead serious, So we

150
00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:19,000
Speaker 1: broke out. We were like out of l A, like

151
00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:22,480
Speaker 1: l A. The numbers are going crazy, the world is

152
00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:24,600
Speaker 1: kind of opening up, but I don't believe that we're

153
00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:26,880
Speaker 1: gonna be okay. So we were like, let's break out

154
00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:29,840
Speaker 1: of here, let's go, let's go see family, let's do it.

155
00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:33,960
Speaker 1: R Ving is the is the easiest social distancing way

156
00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:38,560
Speaker 1: to travel. You are by yourself, you never need to

157
00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:41,520
Speaker 1: be around anybody. You go into the truck stop, you

158
00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:44,520
Speaker 1: put your thing in. There's actually apps that you can

159
00:08:44,559 --> 00:08:46,920
Speaker 1: do where you you're like, I'm at pump twenty three

160
00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:50,760
Speaker 1: and fill it up, get back in and keep it moving. Um.

161
00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:57,440
Speaker 1: The only thing you ever have huh, expensive gas for that. Um,

162
00:08:57,520 --> 00:09:02,400
Speaker 1: well it's diesel, so you know, it's it's it's in

163
00:09:02,440 --> 00:09:04,880
Speaker 1: some places it's more expensive. In some places it's cheaper,

164
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:07,640
Speaker 1: depending on where you are in the country. But but

165
00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:11,000
Speaker 1: we we we just went and we and we loved it,

166
00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:14,600
Speaker 1: and so we got into the rhythm of I always

167
00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:19,719
Speaker 1: said to her, you handle inside. I got outside, right,

168
00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:23,640
Speaker 1: So anything that we're doing outside, anything that was like

169
00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,720
Speaker 1: physical with the RV, all of that was me. She

170
00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,120
Speaker 1: handled all the inside, most of the cooking, most of

171
00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:32,240
Speaker 1: the you know, we both clean, but um, you know,

172
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:35,480
Speaker 1: the handling of the stuff inside. She got about what

173
00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:38,760
Speaker 1: about the zoom meetings for for classes and and all

174
00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:42,319
Speaker 1: the educational stuff. So typically at most r V parks

175
00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:45,880
Speaker 1: they've got WiFi, so you can tap right into the WiFi.

176
00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:49,040
Speaker 1: The other thing is is that my RV actually has

177
00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:54,760
Speaker 1: a four g um actual hot spot. So I as

178
00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:57,800
Speaker 1: long as I have cellular, I have a hot spot,

179
00:09:57,840 --> 00:10:01,880
Speaker 1: and basically I have WiFi that everyone can connect to.

180
00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:07,400
Speaker 1: So Alfonso's WiFi in his RV is way better than

181
00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:12,480
Speaker 1: my WiFi at home as loud as you've got cellular.

182
00:10:12,559 --> 00:10:15,280
Speaker 1: As long as you've got cellular, the WiFi works great.

183
00:10:15,559 --> 00:10:18,160
Speaker 1: Like for the kids. We you know, we're streaming in

184
00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:21,040
Speaker 1: the r V. We've got WiFi, we can get on computer,

185
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:24,960
Speaker 1: we're we are a mobile unit traveling around the country

186
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:27,439
Speaker 1: and it was fantastic for all of us. Now I'm

187
00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:29,559
Speaker 1: back in l A because now we're back at work

188
00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:31,720
Speaker 1: and we're filming a f V again, So I've got

189
00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:33,760
Speaker 1: to be here. But I have like a month that

190
00:10:33,760 --> 00:10:36,719
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be off. We're wrapping up in the mid

191
00:10:36,760 --> 00:10:40,160
Speaker 1: September and we're gone. We are out of here again.

192
00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:43,080
Speaker 1: We're gonna go away for a month, go traveling. UM.

193
00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:45,080
Speaker 1: Whenever we need to go anywhere. We're gonna just make

194
00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:47,400
Speaker 1: sure that the places that we go have four G

195
00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:52,280
Speaker 1: capability UM, and we'll be we'll be doing schooling and

196
00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:55,920
Speaker 1: social distancing all of that while still not being stuck

197
00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:58,360
Speaker 1: in the house because we just don't know how long

198
00:10:58,440 --> 00:11:01,320
Speaker 1: this is gonna be. And for us, we felt like

199
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:04,680
Speaker 1: it was super important to create a world that they're

200
00:11:04,720 --> 00:11:08,280
Speaker 1: going to be happy in. UM. Unfortunately, not to create

201
00:11:08,320 --> 00:11:11,080
Speaker 1: that world for my kids, you know, to be able

202
00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:14,239
Speaker 1: to buy an RV, to be able to go do that. UM.

203
00:11:14,280 --> 00:11:16,559
Speaker 1: But but I think the important message, though, Alphonso, is

204
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:20,000
Speaker 1: what you're talking about is the ability to adapt. So

205
00:11:20,440 --> 00:11:23,440
Speaker 1: you know, regardless of what their finances as your capability is,

206
00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:25,520
Speaker 1: you had something that you were able to adapt and

207
00:11:25,559 --> 00:11:28,640
Speaker 1: it was sustainable. And and so I guess I asked you, Jerry, like,

208
00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:31,240
Speaker 1: what was your how did you adapt and what was

209
00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:34,920
Speaker 1: sustainable for you? Because you know, I think I'm looking

210
00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:37,960
Speaker 1: at myself right now. I did something that wasn't sustainable.

211
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:41,680
Speaker 1: I wanted to overdrive to try to compensate for all

212
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:44,079
Speaker 1: of this hectic stuff, and like you know, new information

213
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:45,480
Speaker 1: coming out, and so I try to go an old

214
00:11:45,559 --> 00:11:47,959
Speaker 1: drive and then I got burnt out. It wasn't sustainable.

215
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,240
Speaker 1: And then I just telling myself sitting in my office

216
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,640
Speaker 1: watching the news, feeling like I was depressed and just

217
00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:54,640
Speaker 1: getting all the update, Well what should we do? Should

218
00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,959
Speaker 1: we overbuy? And do we done by it? It was

219
00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,240
Speaker 1: all this stuff. What's been the way that you've kept

220
00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:02,800
Speaker 1: things sustainable? Jerry? Well, my family and I did rent

221
00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:05,440
Speaker 1: in RV for four days and we drove to the

222
00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:11,360
Speaker 1: settlement four miles. We we went to the southern tip

223
00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:16,360
Speaker 1: of Yosemite. And after four days, I mean it was

224
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:18,240
Speaker 1: not going well. We got out of their movie, so

225
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:21,800
Speaker 1: we don't have I don't have the bond that Alfonso's

226
00:12:21,840 --> 00:12:25,160
Speaker 1: family has with each other. Obviously. UM no, if the

227
00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:30,079
Speaker 1: if there's anything I've learned, UM during these last five months,

228
00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:34,040
Speaker 1: is I really have to have patience as a dad.

229
00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:39,400
Speaker 1: You know, I'm you know, I'm the dad, and um

230
00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:44,000
Speaker 1: if I'm freaking out, um in my household, and by

231
00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:45,800
Speaker 1: the way, I have a right to be. I when

232
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:47,880
Speaker 1: I got married to my wife, I never thought I'd

233
00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:49,839
Speaker 1: be spending this much time with her. When I had

234
00:12:49,960 --> 00:12:54,200
Speaker 1: children with my wife, I never thought I would be

235
00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:56,120
Speaker 1: spending this much time with them. I mean, we're kind

236
00:12:56,120 --> 00:12:58,480
Speaker 1: of joking, but I'm not. Normally, I have a job,

237
00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:02,120
Speaker 1: I go somewhere. Uh, I can go out to a restaurant,

238
00:13:02,160 --> 00:13:03,800
Speaker 1: I can go meet my buddies at a bar. I

239
00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:08,000
Speaker 1: can go play golf with Alfonse. So um, really all

240
00:13:08,040 --> 00:13:11,760
Speaker 1: of those things are not open right now, and I'm

241
00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:16,920
Speaker 1: stuck with these three people in my house. And listen,

242
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,360
Speaker 1: It's very easy when your kid comes in and screaming about,

243
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:23,440
Speaker 1: you know, not being able to get onto a WiFi,

244
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:26,040
Speaker 1: onto a zoom class. You know, it's so easy to

245
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:28,319
Speaker 1: say like, um, you know, stop yelling at me. I

246
00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:30,079
Speaker 1: don't know why you're you're kicking on the zoo class.

247
00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:35,600
Speaker 1: It's not like I'm not like a zoom experts um,

248
00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:37,600
Speaker 1: you know, I like, I don't work at best by

249
00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:41,160
Speaker 1: What what do you think? You think? Geek squad um?

250
00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:43,080
Speaker 1: What was it? What was your first response when your

251
00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:45,480
Speaker 1: kids say, hey, Dad, I want to change my background?

252
00:13:45,760 --> 00:13:47,800
Speaker 1: My daughter asked me, that's like, I don't even know

253
00:13:47,840 --> 00:13:50,400
Speaker 1: what that is, Like, what are you talking about? Like?

254
00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:53,080
Speaker 1: How do you change? All my friends have backgrounds. I'm like,

255
00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:56,000
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I've never even heard of m until the year.

256
00:13:56,520 --> 00:14:00,720
Speaker 1: You've having a seventeen year old, right, so she's the one.

257
00:14:00,760 --> 00:14:03,280
Speaker 1: It's like if I need to know how to do something,

258
00:14:03,280 --> 00:14:05,920
Speaker 1: I'm like, hey, Sienna, can you show me how to

259
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,600
Speaker 1: do this? And my wife is really good at that,

260
00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:12,640
Speaker 1: you know. Listen. The beauty of all of this is

261
00:14:12,679 --> 00:14:17,000
Speaker 1: basically being able. Like I bought a new RV. New

262
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:22,680
Speaker 1: RVs typically have the most problems, right, An older RV

263
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:26,840
Speaker 1: actually is typically they've gone through all the problems. I've

264
00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:29,600
Speaker 1: gotten them fixed. Right. So I went into this knowing

265
00:14:29,640 --> 00:14:31,800
Speaker 1: that things were going to happen. We were going to

266
00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:33,840
Speaker 1: deal with people who were going to be rude. We

267
00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:36,600
Speaker 1: were gonna deal with racism because we went through areas

268
00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:39,280
Speaker 1: of the South and places in the Midwest that we're

269
00:14:39,320 --> 00:14:42,880
Speaker 1: not school. We were dealing with, you know, the r

270
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:45,560
Speaker 1: V having trouble. At the end of the day, it

271
00:14:45,640 --> 00:14:49,400
Speaker 1: was like, we're not going to allow this to affect

272
00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:52,440
Speaker 1: our energy. We are going to blow it off the

273
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:56,680
Speaker 1: shoulder and keep on moving. And I think that is

274
00:14:58,080 --> 00:15:00,560
Speaker 1: and I'm not saying that I'm perfect and anyway, but

275
00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:02,840
Speaker 1: I look at it and I say that is what

276
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,640
Speaker 1: we all need to be able to do during this time.

277
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:09,720
Speaker 1: Nothing is in our control. We've got to let go

278
00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:14,200
Speaker 1: of certain things that are simply not controllable and accept that, Okay,

279
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:16,680
Speaker 1: these things are going to be difficult. These things are hard,

280
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,320
Speaker 1: but how do we roll with it? And for me

281
00:15:19,560 --> 00:15:21,920
Speaker 1: as the guy, as the man, as the man of

282
00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:24,680
Speaker 1: the house, I'm like, well, if I set the tone,

283
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:28,800
Speaker 1: then everybody else can follow. Right now, how do you

284
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:30,360
Speaker 1: how do you move that forward? Because there are a

285
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:32,680
Speaker 1: lot of people who are you know, who are listening

286
00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:35,840
Speaker 1: in and they're saying, Okay, I need to now learn

287
00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:37,600
Speaker 1: from what I did last year. What are some of

288
00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:40,880
Speaker 1: the things that you learned from last year that you go, okay,

289
00:15:40,920 --> 00:15:43,560
Speaker 1: you know what that didn't work. This is what I'm doing.

290
00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:48,840
Speaker 1: In for for example, my kids fitness levels dropped. Uh,

291
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:54,280
Speaker 1: they're eating habits got nasty. I mean because and myself included,

292
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:57,520
Speaker 1: because I constantly was going to the fridge either out

293
00:15:57,560 --> 00:16:01,680
Speaker 1: of emotional boredom on a stress. My kids feel like

294
00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:04,560
Speaker 1: they're locked up. Where you play outside, Okay, go real

295
00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:06,720
Speaker 1: quick and ride your back around the thing. And you

296
00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:09,840
Speaker 1: know we're just making stuff up. But now like for

297
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:12,840
Speaker 1: for for example, I am now like creating as as

298
00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:15,320
Speaker 1: we're speaking now, as soon as we get off this

299
00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:19,240
Speaker 1: off this podcast, I'm actually creating a PE list for

300
00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:21,680
Speaker 1: the entire school years, so I know that the fitness

301
00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:25,120
Speaker 1: level no matter what during PE time, there's no I'm

302
00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:27,360
Speaker 1: not taking any meetings, I'm not having any work. I'm

303
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:31,640
Speaker 1: not doing anything unless they come pay me to do.

304
00:16:32,160 --> 00:16:34,080
Speaker 1: I want my kids and I want my kids in

305
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:40,000
Speaker 1: your gym class. I will send mine to the school

306
00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:44,080
Speaker 1: of pech. I think, I think what you're saying is

307
00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:46,680
Speaker 1: absolutely perfectly right off Like I think you're you're you're

308
00:16:47,160 --> 00:16:51,880
Speaker 1: creating a system, and that is the way we all

309
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:55,000
Speaker 1: function at least for us in our house, is the best.

310
00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:57,200
Speaker 1: Like when it's just like well, we're just gonna roll

311
00:16:57,280 --> 00:16:59,720
Speaker 1: with it. It doesn't always work the best. This is

312
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:01,840
Speaker 1: what doing. We're getting up in the morning. We're gonna

313
00:17:01,880 --> 00:17:03,960
Speaker 1: take our showers, we're gonna brush our teeth. We're gonna

314
00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:07,080
Speaker 1: go downstairs. We're gonna have breakfast. We're gonna zoom class

315
00:17:07,119 --> 00:17:09,160
Speaker 1: for two hours. Then we're gonna get up. We're gonna

316
00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:12,440
Speaker 1: go outside. We're gonna run around. When we're outside running around,

317
00:17:12,480 --> 00:17:14,720
Speaker 1: we're gonna do this, this, this, this, and this. Okay,

318
00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:16,600
Speaker 1: then we're gonna come back in. We're gonna do that again.

319
00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:18,520
Speaker 1: We're gonna got on a zoom call. Then we're gonna

320
00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:21,760
Speaker 1: get off of that. Having a complete schedule, we actually

321
00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:25,200
Speaker 1: have a board and we write down everything that they

322
00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:28,400
Speaker 1: need to do, whether it's speech classes or whatever. It's

323
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:32,159
Speaker 1: on the board. So now you're not actually being the

324
00:17:32,359 --> 00:17:36,480
Speaker 1: bad guy. The key to it is it's on the schedule.

325
00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:39,760
Speaker 1: It's already on the board. We know we have to

326
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:42,280
Speaker 1: do this, and I know that it stinks right now

327
00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:45,159
Speaker 1: that you've got to do it, but it's on the board.

328
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,840
Speaker 1: You make the board the bad guy, and you sense it.

329
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:50,520
Speaker 1: And of course you know as they get older, they're

330
00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:53,600
Speaker 1: like you wrote the board we're talking about, but you're

331
00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:58,600
Speaker 1: keeping them on a schedule. Kids like consistency, right, Why

332
00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:01,200
Speaker 1: do kids, you know, at a younger age not get

333
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 1: upset when they have to go to school because it's consistent.

334
00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:05,760
Speaker 1: They know they gotta do it. This isn't this isn't

335
00:18:05,760 --> 00:18:13,280
Speaker 1: a choice creating those systems. It's exactly familiarity with things

336
00:18:13,359 --> 00:18:18,160
Speaker 1: that they're comfortable doing. If you create exercises in your backyard. Um,

337
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:24,399
Speaker 1: I lost ten pounds over COVID right, like, yeah, you

338
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:26,760
Speaker 1: saw it looks very gave you. Jerry just gave you

339
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:29,320
Speaker 1: that look like come on, man, like I put on

340
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,680
Speaker 1: you know, it was a look of I'm ashamed right

341
00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:36,040
Speaker 1: now because I show you what I don't want to

342
00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:38,280
Speaker 1: show you what's happening under here. You know what I

343
00:18:38,320 --> 00:18:41,320
Speaker 1: call it. I call it Corona Chubb. That's what I've

344
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:46,120
Speaker 1: called it. I've called I've put on six pack there,

345
00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:48,359
Speaker 1: it's like now it's like a one pack now. But

346
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:51,040
Speaker 1: it was any but any facial expressions I was making

347
00:18:51,119 --> 00:18:57,119
Speaker 1: was out of jealousy, saying here like, come on, I

348
00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:01,560
Speaker 1: lost ten pounds and it's just simply one wife's cooking

349
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,920
Speaker 1: right now. I don't get to go to in and out,

350
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:08,919
Speaker 1: or I don't get to go to my favorite restaurants

351
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:13,240
Speaker 1: that put a boatload of butter and other stuff in

352
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:16,119
Speaker 1: it that like is going to make you gain weight,

353
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:22,119
Speaker 1: Like she was being consistent with breakfast, was this, lunch?

354
00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:25,760
Speaker 1: Is this dinner? Is this? And different? You know, switching

355
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:30,120
Speaker 1: it up of course, but it was controlled so to me.

356
00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:33,520
Speaker 1: And then getting up in every day when we get

357
00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:36,280
Speaker 1: to a new RV site, we go for a walk,

358
00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:38,600
Speaker 1: get the kids out, we're gonna go. They hop on

359
00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:41,520
Speaker 1: their scooters, We go for walks, we walk around the place,

360
00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:43,600
Speaker 1: we get up, we do some exercise, we went a

361
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,639
Speaker 1: little bit, we throw the ball, We're doing stuff, and

362
00:19:46,680 --> 00:19:51,840
Speaker 1: we're moving every day. And that's just consistent. If you

363
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:55,560
Speaker 1: can do that every day in your home living, that

364
00:19:55,680 --> 00:20:00,359
Speaker 1: consistency turns into positivity. So, Jerry, what what kind of

365
00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:02,640
Speaker 1: fun activities are you doing with your kids to get

366
00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:05,439
Speaker 1: them moving or just just to kind of break the

367
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:07,480
Speaker 1: monotony of being at home, because I think that's the

368
00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:09,480
Speaker 1: other part that was difficult, is that I think my

369
00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:13,720
Speaker 1: kids got tired of seeing our four walls, you know,

370
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:17,600
Speaker 1: just like, uh, do we have to again anything you're

371
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:19,919
Speaker 1: doing differently? First of all, at Bar. I do have

372
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,840
Speaker 1: to say, if you do do a PE class for

373
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:27,840
Speaker 1: kids in school, please put it on your Instagram, send

374
00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:30,000
Speaker 1: us all the link. Let's all join up. This would

375
00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:33,040
Speaker 1: be amazing if you had like a large PE class

376
00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:35,040
Speaker 1: that you were running it. I mean, I would be

377
00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:38,359
Speaker 1: definitely into that. It's tough to get my kids moving

378
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,120
Speaker 1: around a little bit, you know. I mean, I think

379
00:20:40,119 --> 00:20:43,800
Speaker 1: it's also why I'm so grateful to be, you know,

380
00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:46,399
Speaker 1: partnering with Bob Evans these days, is that you know,

381
00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:50,760
Speaker 1: we're responsible for every meal at home now and if

382
00:20:50,760 --> 00:20:53,199
Speaker 1: not for Bob Evans and they're ready to eat you know,

383
00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:58,960
Speaker 1: meals with made with real ingredients. Um, i'd uh, I'd

384
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,520
Speaker 1: be up the creek man. You know, I'm gonna jump

385
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:04,160
Speaker 1: on that because I can tell you real talk. My

386
00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:07,960
Speaker 1: grocery bills I mean just went, I mean just it

387
00:21:08,119 --> 00:21:10,919
Speaker 1: just we blew up the whole budget. The budget was

388
00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:13,320
Speaker 1: just blown out because it was hard to kind of

389
00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:16,200
Speaker 1: figure out what the new pacing of eating was and

390
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:18,760
Speaker 1: not having stuff there, and we lost time because we're like,

391
00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:22,160
Speaker 1: I'm hungry, we gotta make something because we weren't used

392
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:25,399
Speaker 1: to that that that flow where you know, at home

393
00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:27,639
Speaker 1: when that's cool. We're not worried about making anything. Now

394
00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:29,560
Speaker 1: we have to try to come up with the menu

395
00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:32,000
Speaker 1: and try to create all of this to kind of,

396
00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:34,639
Speaker 1: you know, keep the kids at bay and then you know,

397
00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:37,960
Speaker 1: there's these long stretch, but any other fun activities you

398
00:21:38,320 --> 00:21:41,240
Speaker 1: might be doing with the kids, or any great ideas

399
00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:44,040
Speaker 1: like just to kind of break up you know, I mean, listen,

400
00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:48,200
Speaker 1: I know I'm speaking to an elite athlete right now. UM.

401
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: I do want to say I did attempt to put

402
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:57,480
Speaker 1: my children into like a soccer camp before all this. Um,

403
00:21:57,520 --> 00:22:00,920
Speaker 1: I have two daughters and you know, I wanted to

404
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:05,919
Speaker 1: see if they they had any athletic ability whatso whatsoever.

405
00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:07,760
Speaker 1: And I put them in a soccer camp and the

406
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:12,440
Speaker 1: coach called me up, and uh, I was like why

407
00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:14,120
Speaker 1: is the what why do you call me up? Coach?

408
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:15,119
Speaker 1: And he was like, I want to talk to you

409
00:22:15,119 --> 00:22:17,040
Speaker 1: about your daughter. And I was like, wow, this is

410
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:19,920
Speaker 1: this is how it happens, Like this is in my head.

411
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:23,040
Speaker 1: I was like, you your your your kids starts playing

412
00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:24,920
Speaker 1: soccer and then the coach says, I need to work

413
00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:28,400
Speaker 1: with her alone. I think she's she can really take

414
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:29,760
Speaker 1: it to the next level. I think we have the

415
00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:31,840
Speaker 1: next Mia Ham on her hands here and I was like,

416
00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:34,200
Speaker 1: I guess I'll be driving her all over the country

417
00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:36,359
Speaker 1: in our different tournaments and stuff. I can't believe this.

418
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:38,679
Speaker 1: Like she's gonna represent the United States. It's gonna be

419
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:42,040
Speaker 1: really great. And the coach said, your daughter shows no

420
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:46,120
Speaker 1: interest in soccer whatsoever. I feel bad taking your money

421
00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:48,119
Speaker 1: and having her come to this class all the time.

422
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,639
Speaker 1: It's like, wow, coach, I don't pay you to hear

423
00:22:52,720 --> 00:23:00,080
Speaker 1: your opinion. Just keep her alive, her run her. That

424
00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:08,399
Speaker 1: escalated quickly. I mean, it was a precipitous drop. That's

425
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:14,480
Speaker 1: that's the balloon. It one. The thing is the thing

426
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:16,520
Speaker 1: for us is that like and I'm I feel like

427
00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:22,160
Speaker 1: I'm really lucky. My two boys are UM are Jeff athletic,

428
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:25,240
Speaker 1: and they want to run around and they're literally outdoors

429
00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:27,239
Speaker 1: trying to, you know, run around and do as much

430
00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:30,239
Speaker 1: as they can all the time. UM My daughter was

431
00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:34,680
Speaker 1: UM on the road to being an Olympic gymnasts. UM

432
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:36,600
Speaker 1: and now she's seventeen. She heard her back, so she

433
00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:38,439
Speaker 1: wasn't able to do it anymore. But the meeting, the

434
00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:42,000
Speaker 1: minute that happened, she switched over into dance. UM, so

435
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:47,600
Speaker 1: you know, motivated physically, Um, my kids are so for me,

436
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:51,480
Speaker 1: it's it's then kind of focusing that energy, trying to

437
00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:54,040
Speaker 1: just make sure that that energy gets focused into learning,

438
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:57,520
Speaker 1: into developing skills and becoming better at whatever they're they're

439
00:23:57,560 --> 00:24:01,800
Speaker 1: interested in. Um, I'm probably this afternoon gonna take my

440
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:04,160
Speaker 1: my kid out to the driving range and we're gonna

441
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:07,760
Speaker 1: go hit golf balls, right just because he wants to

442
00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:10,680
Speaker 1: go do it. He just he's all in so um.

443
00:24:10,720 --> 00:24:14,520
Speaker 1: But but in terms of advice, I would say, you know,

444
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:18,240
Speaker 1: you've got to make it fun. I think every person

445
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:23,320
Speaker 1: who's ever made it to the elite in any sport,

446
00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:27,000
Speaker 1: in anything in the world, it's not other people pushing

447
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 1: you to do it. You gotta find those things that

448
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:34,760
Speaker 1: they enjoy, you know, have them try everything. People you

449
00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:37,040
Speaker 1: used to laugh at me all the time because it's like, dude,

450
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:40,480
Speaker 1: you do everything, And I'm like, yeah, I do everything.

451
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:42,879
Speaker 1: The reason why I do everything is because I tried

452
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:46,520
Speaker 1: everything right and I didn't just try and like I

453
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:47,720
Speaker 1: did it one day and I was like, yeah, I

454
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:49,680
Speaker 1: didn't like it. I was like, no, no, I'm gonna

455
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:53,120
Speaker 1: learn how to play baseball. I played baseball. I'm gonna

456
00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:56,040
Speaker 1: learn how to play basketball. I played basketball. I'm gonna

457
00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,920
Speaker 1: learn how to race cars. I race cars. I'm gonna

458
00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,560
Speaker 1: learn how to play golf. I play golf like I

459
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:03,880
Speaker 1: do it. I learned how to play racquetball. I learned

460
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:07,119
Speaker 1: how to play tennis. I learned. I learned everything and

461
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:08,679
Speaker 1: learned how to dance. I learned how to sing. I

462
00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:10,240
Speaker 1: learned how to act. I learned how to direct. I

463
00:25:10,359 --> 00:25:12,479
Speaker 1: learn how to light. I learned how to write right. Like,

464
00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:18,000
Speaker 1: just keep learning, just keep trying, and don't make it

465
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,920
Speaker 1: a short run. Figure it out, do it just enough.

466
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:24,919
Speaker 1: Just motivating our kids to just try things and to

467
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:29,640
Speaker 1: experience things is the key. The one thing I've said

468
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:31,440
Speaker 1: in all of my life. I do this all the time.

469
00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:33,800
Speaker 1: I say, I don't want to read about something in

470
00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:37,240
Speaker 1: a history book or in a geography book. I want

471
00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:39,879
Speaker 1: to go see it. I want to go experience it.

472
00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:42,720
Speaker 1: I want my kids to go what does Mount Rushmore

473
00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:46,000
Speaker 1: look like? And not decide to go to a magazine

474
00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:48,840
Speaker 1: or a book or on the internet to look at pictures.

475
00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:52,360
Speaker 1: I want them to go to our picture library and go, oh,

476
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:55,200
Speaker 1: when we were at Mount Rushmore, this was cool because

477
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:58,959
Speaker 1: of this, this, that net because they experience it, and

478
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:02,760
Speaker 1: that experience experience really sticks with them. It's something that

479
00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:04,959
Speaker 1: is cemented in them. I guess the last one for

480
00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:07,160
Speaker 1: me would be for both of you guys. Jerry, I'll

481
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:10,680
Speaker 1: start with you, is how do you challenge your kids?

482
00:26:11,119 --> 00:26:13,320
Speaker 1: Because what I've seen and what I know to be true,

483
00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:16,159
Speaker 1: is that when you're with your kids that long, you

484
00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:20,840
Speaker 1: start to see deficiencies areas that maybe the schools can't

485
00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:24,240
Speaker 1: see because oftentimes when you you send your kids to school,

486
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:26,320
Speaker 1: you know, you come home and you've got the homework

487
00:26:26,359 --> 00:26:28,159
Speaker 1: that they're dealing with. You see that. But I'm seeing

488
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:30,640
Speaker 1: other things and my kids that I didn't know really existed.

489
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:33,760
Speaker 1: So I'm trying to challenge them. So I guess what's

490
00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:35,560
Speaker 1: the best play because I know I Fonso was talking

491
00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:38,280
Speaker 1: about trying to find a way like athletically, what what

492
00:26:38,359 --> 00:26:40,639
Speaker 1: a kid likes? How do you challenge your kid in

493
00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:44,240
Speaker 1: a way that is productive? Um, you know, sometimes feelings

494
00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:46,680
Speaker 1: get hurt. How do you do that? And You've got

495
00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 1: twins so I know and I both have shared that

496
00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:52,960
Speaker 1: in common. I find screaming at them helps if you

497
00:26:53,080 --> 00:26:56,320
Speaker 1: really like get in their face and you really yell

498
00:26:57,359 --> 00:27:03,760
Speaker 1: and serious teasing, making fun of them, teasing them, finding

499
00:27:03,760 --> 00:27:07,239
Speaker 1: out what their insecurities are really like, get hammering them

500
00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:11,960
Speaker 1: on those These are jokes everyone. Um I guess it's

501
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:16,200
Speaker 1: like Fonso said, just find something that they also enjoy,

502
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:19,159
Speaker 1: you know, I mean, like I mean Alfonse, I was

503
00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:21,760
Speaker 1: just talking about it. With the golf too. I got

504
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:24,520
Speaker 1: a couple of lessons for my girls. I was really

505
00:27:24,560 --> 00:27:27,280
Speaker 1: I saw that photo of Tiger catting for his son

506
00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:29,240
Speaker 1: and I was like last week, I was like, girls

507
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:32,399
Speaker 1: were taking some golf lessons. We're getting out there and

508
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:35,119
Speaker 1: they're just not feeling it. And you can't force you

509
00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:38,080
Speaker 1: can't force him to do with what they kid do. Hey,

510
00:27:38,119 --> 00:27:40,080
Speaker 1: act bar, I gotta say that photo you posted with

511
00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:42,720
Speaker 1: your son and Kobe the other day was very emotional.

512
00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:45,679
Speaker 1: That was bring the kids and athletes and stuff. I

513
00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:50,120
Speaker 1: mean that was crazy. Yeah, you know, those those types

514
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:52,480
Speaker 1: of moments you never forget. You know. Obviously yesterday was

515
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:57,560
Speaker 1: um or when I posted that Ko Kobe day and

516
00:27:57,720 --> 00:28:00,320
Speaker 1: just thinking about you know, him taking that time after

517
00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:02,440
Speaker 1: he kept his word during the game that yeah, I'll

518
00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:04,359
Speaker 1: come get that photo with my son, and it was

519
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:06,200
Speaker 1: just one of those things I'll never forget. So that's

520
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:09,400
Speaker 1: why I posted it um, I'll find some what about you.

521
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:11,760
Speaker 1: We're out of time here, but I wanted to get

522
00:28:11,800 --> 00:28:13,960
Speaker 1: your thoughts on how you challenge your kids to be

523
00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:16,760
Speaker 1: the absolute best when you're around them for so long,

524
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:21,359
Speaker 1: especially when you see weaknesses you know academically, how do

525
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:24,200
Speaker 1: you challenge them to get better in that? So? I

526
00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:28,840
Speaker 1: like to utilize UM. When I used to race cars professionally,

527
00:28:29,280 --> 00:28:32,720
Speaker 1: there were two trains of thought, right. The first thought

528
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,840
Speaker 1: was where are you good on the track and where

529
00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 1: are you bad on the track? Make the areas on

530
00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:43,480
Speaker 1: the track better and try to be just overall good.

531
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:47,200
Speaker 1: And then the other thought was, don't worry about the

532
00:28:47,240 --> 00:28:50,520
Speaker 1: places you're bad on the track. Make sure you're the

533
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:55,040
Speaker 1: best on the track in a specific area, because if

534
00:28:55,080 --> 00:28:59,160
Speaker 1: you can just make it through while in your bad areas,

535
00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:03,520
Speaker 1: you will really succeed in the areas that you are great.

536
00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:07,880
Speaker 1: So I don't try to focus on the areas where

537
00:29:07,920 --> 00:29:12,600
Speaker 1: they're where they're deficient. I try to really push the

538
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:17,960
Speaker 1: areas that they are great at and really lift those up. Now,

539
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:22,760
Speaker 1: by lifting those up, you create a difference between what

540
00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 1: they're really good at and what they're not if they

541
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 1: have it inside themselves, and that kind of internal motivation.

542
00:29:30,240 --> 00:29:33,560
Speaker 1: They'll want to lift the bottom and get it closer

543
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:37,760
Speaker 1: to what you've excelled at. So to me, I'm pushing

544
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:41,480
Speaker 1: on all the areas that they're great. Let's just focus here,

545
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 1: focus and be better, be better, be better, be better,

546
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:46,880
Speaker 1: be better, be great, be great. Because they desire that

547
00:29:47,200 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 1: they want to be great there, then that ego lifts

548
00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 1: the bottom of the things that they're not so great at.

549
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:58,200
Speaker 1: They'll help lift that up to be closer to the

550
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:01,720
Speaker 1: areas in which they're great at. Um. Did you also

551
00:30:01,760 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 1: did motivational speaking as well? Did you say that I've done.

552
00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:09,479
Speaker 1: I've done a little. But but the thing for me

553
00:30:09,600 --> 00:30:12,160
Speaker 1: is that that is the that is. You know, we

554
00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:16,960
Speaker 1: all have to have a theory of our lives. How

555
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 1: do we function and what is our theory about how

556
00:30:19,880 --> 00:30:22,760
Speaker 1: do we succeed in life? Right? Jerry and I know

557
00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:27,160
Speaker 1: this very well. In acting, one person gets the job.

558
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:33,560
Speaker 1: So if I'm a chubby, short guy, I don't need

559
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:37,440
Speaker 1: to work on my muscle skills because I'm not going

560
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 1: to get a role as a big hunk in an

561
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:44,920
Speaker 1: action film. I'm a little chubby guy. I need to

562
00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:48,920
Speaker 1: be funny, so I will be the funniest little chunky

563
00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:53,520
Speaker 1: guy on the planet, because that's where I'm actually going

564
00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:58,800
Speaker 1: to succeed. And then once I succeed there, I'll lift,

565
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 1: I'll get shape, I'll do that. But be great at

566
00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:05,320
Speaker 1: the things that you're great at it, don't be mediocre

567
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:08,520
Speaker 1: at everything. Yeah, I love that. I love that because

568
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 1: what I'm hearing from that is operating in your strength.

569
00:31:11,280 --> 00:31:12,880
Speaker 1: And that's what I noticed with my own kids. I

570
00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:15,640
Speaker 1: try to get them to operate in their own strength. Um.

571
00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:18,120
Speaker 1: I try to encourage them. I try to identify the

572
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:20,280
Speaker 1: negative talk because you hear that, you know, when they

573
00:31:20,280 --> 00:31:22,719
Speaker 1: get off the computer, if they're frustrated from a lesson.

574
00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:26,360
Speaker 1: I try to identify the negative talk and then encourage

575
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 1: them because I always say, my mom told me this

576
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 1: a lot, is that your words are very powerful. When

577
00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:32,840
Speaker 1: it comes out of your mouth is usually your state

578
00:31:32,840 --> 00:31:35,440
Speaker 1: of mind. And so trying to reverse that and get

579
00:31:35,520 --> 00:31:38,440
Speaker 1: them to see the best of themselves. But guys, this

580
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:40,880
Speaker 1: is great. Um, you know, people are getting a real

581
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:44,120
Speaker 1: thought or real look into how men think. So thank you, guys,

582
00:31:44,240 --> 00:31:47,960
Speaker 1: Jerry Alfonso for giving your time. Twelve thousand miles. That's

583
00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:50,040
Speaker 1: a lot of miles. Now I gotta go look at

584
00:31:50,080 --> 00:31:51,840
Speaker 1: my budget and see if I can at least get

585
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:55,480
Speaker 1: six thousand miles in our because that's pretty dope. I'm

586
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 1: not gonna lie, that's pretty dope. Yeah, we were about

587
00:31:57,920 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 1: to put a bunch more. We put a bunch more

588
00:31:59,840 --> 00:32:04,160
Speaker 1: all there each bob Et Grocery dot com foods along

589
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:15,720
Speaker 1: the way. All right, thank you guys so much. All right,

590
00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:17,760
Speaker 1: so we're back, and let me tell you that was

591
00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 1: such a great conversation with Alfonso and Jerry. I learned

592
00:32:21,680 --> 00:32:24,520
Speaker 1: so much. We're so we're so much alike, but we're

593
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:27,160
Speaker 1: so different and so that was cool. But uh, we've

594
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:30,040
Speaker 1: got a real treat coming up next. You guys know

595
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:34,160
Speaker 1: her as the Supernanny, but Joe Frost is just an

596
00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:38,880
Speaker 1: absolutely an amazing mind and amazing supernanny. Joe, are you

597
00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:43,560
Speaker 1: with us? Appreciate Thank you for having me. Yeah, no problem,

598
00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:47,560
Speaker 1: I mean you are v Joe Frost. Obviously the Weld

599
00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 1: earned title of the Supernanny. What would you say the parents,

600
00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:55,360
Speaker 1: the parents who are listening, UM is probably maybe if

601
00:32:55,360 --> 00:32:57,480
Speaker 1: you have an advisor to on how to start the

602
00:32:57,480 --> 00:33:00,000
Speaker 1: new school year, because I think that's probably the most

603
00:33:00,040 --> 00:33:02,640
Speaker 1: important thing. A lot of people are anticipating what is

604
00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:05,000
Speaker 1: this year going to look like? Last year kind of

605
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,200
Speaker 1: a last school year rather was just kind of a

606
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:10,200
Speaker 1: wash because we were all kind of reactive. How do

607
00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:15,040
Speaker 1: you become proactive in this new school year? I mean,

608
00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:19,080
Speaker 1: first and foremost, I think you have to which is

609
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:24,040
Speaker 1: a tough one for American families. Having spent many, many

610
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:27,480
Speaker 1: years around the world helping different families. Um, I think

611
00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:30,400
Speaker 1: you've got to lower your expectations. I think we in

612
00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:34,280
Speaker 1: our mind want to be running the gamut of how

613
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:39,080
Speaker 1: things were before and psychologically being in a space to

614
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 1: be able to accept where we are at right now,

615
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:47,520
Speaker 1: where the limitations are. But what we can do is

616
00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:50,440
Speaker 1: a mindset that basically allows us to look at the

617
00:33:51,120 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 1: cup of right what can we do rather than feeling

618
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:58,320
Speaker 1: like everything's being taken away from you and the walls

619
00:33:58,320 --> 00:34:02,560
Speaker 1: are getting smaller and small are so lowering your expectations

620
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:07,719
Speaker 1: Number one is important. Um, with respect to you know,

621
00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:11,200
Speaker 1: what can we do in the day? How does that

622
00:34:11,400 --> 00:34:14,279
Speaker 1: schedule work? Because I can tell you having spoken to

623
00:34:14,800 --> 00:34:19,399
Speaker 1: families around the world regarding school, it's not ideal for

624
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:22,680
Speaker 1: any of us. You know, it's not a perfect picture.

625
00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:27,080
Speaker 1: With respects to how those schedules bode with parents that

626
00:34:27,160 --> 00:34:32,040
Speaker 1: are homeworking. Um with the amount of different kids of

627
00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:35,600
Speaker 1: ages that parents have and the work that's going to

628
00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:38,799
Speaker 1: be expected, Like you know, you want to pray right

629
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:41,240
Speaker 1: now that you hope that you taught those life skills

630
00:34:41,640 --> 00:34:43,600
Speaker 1: because if not, you're going to have a nine year

631
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:45,840
Speaker 1: old that's going to be calling you like a five

632
00:34:45,920 --> 00:34:49,480
Speaker 1: year old right needing to do work right now. And

633
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:53,040
Speaker 1: it's teaching us, you know, it's it's in a way

634
00:34:53,080 --> 00:34:55,880
Speaker 1: I see it like like an athlete. Right there's the

635
00:34:56,120 --> 00:34:59,480
Speaker 1: endurance and the stamina and the moments where you push

636
00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:02,719
Speaker 1: yourself a little bit more because you're having those breakthrough

637
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:06,920
Speaker 1: moments right to excel. And right now, that's what parents

638
00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:09,640
Speaker 1: are doing up here. You know they're finding it tough

639
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:13,920
Speaker 1: and there, you know, they're feeling like they're nearly at

640
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:16,520
Speaker 1: the finished line and they're being told not just a

641
00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:18,279
Speaker 1: little bit more, just a little bit more, just a

642
00:35:18,320 --> 00:35:22,359
Speaker 1: little bit more. And that's painstaking because right now we've

643
00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:26,680
Speaker 1: got a whole heap of parents crying, yeah, thinking that

644
00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 1: a finishing line maybe here, but we can't see it.

645
00:35:30,560 --> 00:35:35,000
Speaker 1: There's no exploration date. So I would say lower expectations

646
00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:40,040
Speaker 1: be realistic with what you can manage. It's not going

647
00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:44,640
Speaker 1: to be perfect. We cannot reach that. However, our duty

648
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:47,520
Speaker 1: first and foremost is to look after our kids, keep

649
00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:51,279
Speaker 1: them alive, keep them safe, make sure that you have

650
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:54,960
Speaker 1: a routine in place that it's going to support the

651
00:35:55,160 --> 00:35:58,840
Speaker 1: schedule that allows you to be able to pace yourself

652
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:01,920
Speaker 1: during the week. But because if you don't, then you

653
00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:05,880
Speaker 1: don't get enough sleep, Then you get irritable. Then arguments happen.

654
00:36:06,280 --> 00:36:09,640
Speaker 1: Then the kids a moody for every little thing, Like

655
00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:12,399
Speaker 1: you cut the toast in triangles and it's not good

656
00:36:12,520 --> 00:36:16,080
Speaker 1: enough now they want it in square Like your teenager

657
00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:18,920
Speaker 1: is arguing with you and all of them, you know,

658
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:22,759
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, you're like, I'm arguing with my

659
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:28,480
Speaker 1: liven year old here, like what is going on right right?

660
00:36:28,600 --> 00:36:31,600
Speaker 1: And you're like, what is going on? Like I just

661
00:36:31,640 --> 00:36:34,799
Speaker 1: sound like I'm in a playground right now, um, And

662
00:36:34,880 --> 00:36:40,680
Speaker 1: you find yourself caught in this tornado of mayhem rather

663
00:36:40,840 --> 00:36:45,680
Speaker 1: than a moment where you can stay grounded, stay grounded

664
00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:49,680
Speaker 1: and focused on what's the objective. The objective is not

665
00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:52,799
Speaker 1: to complete everything perfect. The objective is to be able

666
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:56,080
Speaker 1: to pace, have a routine that supports the family, come

667
00:36:56,120 --> 00:36:59,359
Speaker 1: together if you can at lunchtimes and meal times so

668
00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 1: that you can connect. Don't spin a thousand plates again,

669
00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:11,439
Speaker 1: we'll give each other medals or look a thousand plates. Joe.

670
00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:14,200
Speaker 1: I love this what you're saying, because that's exactly all

671
00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:16,239
Speaker 1: the things that my wife and I we did. And

672
00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:19,319
Speaker 1: I think lowering the expectation. And it's hard because I'm

673
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:22,560
Speaker 1: a former professional athlete and you know, I do tend

674
00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:25,200
Speaker 1: to set the bar high because I've been trained that way.

675
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:27,960
Speaker 1: Like you know, you want something, you gotta go for it.

676
00:37:28,200 --> 00:37:30,480
Speaker 1: But I think what happens is is that it not

677
00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:32,799
Speaker 1: only stresses my wife and I out, but I think

678
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,520
Speaker 1: it stresses out the kids because there's certain things where

679
00:37:36,080 --> 00:37:38,719
Speaker 1: you just are not going to be able to do

680
00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:42,400
Speaker 1: and you have to do you do you want, But

681
00:37:42,560 --> 00:37:46,040
Speaker 1: you do understand what that mindset, which it's not a

682
00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:48,640
Speaker 1: weak it's not a weak it's not a weak mindset.

683
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:51,040
Speaker 1: Because for me, hearing that and initially when you set

684
00:37:51,080 --> 00:37:54,080
Speaker 1: that lowering the bar as an athlete, I hear that,

685
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:56,080
Speaker 1: and as a man, I hear that is Okay, I'm

686
00:37:56,080 --> 00:37:59,520
Speaker 1: giving my kids less. I'm not giving them the best.

687
00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 1: I'm not pushing them to be the top. But if

688
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:05,959
Speaker 1: you're actually saying to actually, if you lower that expectation

689
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:08,240
Speaker 1: and you're not trying to throw so much on their plate,

690
00:38:08,719 --> 00:38:11,720
Speaker 1: you're able to get the most out of this entire

691
00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 1: situation homing, you know, school, and it is being okay

692
00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 1: with your best right. The reality is that we're in

693
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:27,759
Speaker 1: an environment that is not conducive to us reaching what

694
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:33,480
Speaker 1: we were before. So that's like somebody saying to you, hey, um,

695
00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:36,400
Speaker 1: you know, we're going to have an egg and spoon

696
00:38:36,520 --> 00:38:39,480
Speaker 1: race right now, and your legs are gonna be tight,

697
00:38:40,960 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 1: but hey, the rest won't be. You're like, well, how

698
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:46,080
Speaker 1: am I going to compete and run as fast as

699
00:38:46,120 --> 00:38:49,359
Speaker 1: the rest? You know? And the reality is is that

700
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:53,480
Speaker 1: you can't expect to be able to meet what you

701
00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:58,400
Speaker 1: did last year based on the confinement of what is

702
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:02,680
Speaker 1: expected of you. Parents right now are expected to be

703
00:39:02,719 --> 00:39:07,319
Speaker 1: the puppeteer, the entertainer, the teacher, and the parent, and

704
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:11,040
Speaker 1: at the same time, the person who you know is

705
00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:16,080
Speaker 1: working at home holding down enough dialogue to keep your

706
00:39:16,080 --> 00:39:19,400
Speaker 1: relationship together when you've already spoke four thousand words and

707
00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:24,000
Speaker 1: you're done. And on top of that, now let's talk

708
00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:29,359
Speaker 1: about redefining mascularity because you just spoke about being a

709
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:33,640
Speaker 1: man and saying, I don't want to think that it's weak.

710
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:36,560
Speaker 1: I need to remind myself that lawing my expectation is

711
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:39,560
Speaker 1: not a weak thing as a man. And to me,

712
00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:44,600
Speaker 1: that talks to a bigger topic with respect to as

713
00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:48,319
Speaker 1: we are finding out more about ourselves and and the

714
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:51,680
Speaker 1: strength that we have, and it is forcing us to

715
00:39:51,760 --> 00:39:55,279
Speaker 1: have communication that we can no longer use excuses for

716
00:39:55,760 --> 00:39:59,040
Speaker 1: as in, we're too busy at work, we don't have

717
00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:03,279
Speaker 1: time where passing ships. I've got to get to work.

718
00:40:03,320 --> 00:40:06,319
Speaker 1: I've got to stay longer. You know, well, schools doing this.

719
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:08,680
Speaker 1: The a thousand excuses that I hear on a daily

720
00:40:08,719 --> 00:40:11,440
Speaker 1: basis been they've done it, I've tried everything, nothing works.

721
00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:15,399
Speaker 1: The I've tried everything, nothing works. Culture. On top of that,

722
00:40:15,960 --> 00:40:20,600
Speaker 1: this is a major breakthrough for men because women already

723
00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:23,359
Speaker 1: had that movement in the sixties. We already went from

724
00:40:23,400 --> 00:40:28,440
Speaker 1: apen string bearing children, cooking up big peach cobblifies to

725
00:40:28,719 --> 00:40:32,880
Speaker 1: we're in the workforce right and we're holding down careers

726
00:40:33,160 --> 00:40:35,680
Speaker 1: and earning money. And I think there's been a whole,

727
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:40,640
Speaker 1: a whole level of movement with men over the last

728
00:40:42,160 --> 00:40:43,759
Speaker 1: not that long. I'm going to say maybe over the

729
00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:50,840
Speaker 1: last seven eight years, where we have men really growing

730
00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:54,520
Speaker 1: and processing what does it mean today to be a

731
00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:59,399
Speaker 1: man and redefined masculinity because it's not how we were

732
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:03,080
Speaker 1: raised when we were younger and the models that we

733
00:41:03,120 --> 00:41:06,239
Speaker 1: saw from men when we were young boys, but it's

734
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:11,919
Speaker 1: what's expected of us now as fathers, as husbands, and

735
00:41:11,960 --> 00:41:15,680
Speaker 1: how we sit comfortable with that so that we can

736
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:20,520
Speaker 1: grow and be in in this mode that's not survival.

737
00:41:20,840 --> 00:41:25,640
Speaker 1: You know, I'm not the protector or the provider or um.

738
00:41:26,640 --> 00:41:30,080
Speaker 1: You know, the person who is even maybe now the

739
00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:34,120
Speaker 1: bread winner, but the person who is emotionally supportive, the

740
00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:38,040
Speaker 1: person who is is going to recognize that emotionally expressing

741
00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:42,480
Speaker 1: themselves and showing up with purple jobs rather than pink

742
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:45,960
Speaker 1: and blue jobs in the house is about teamwork together

743
00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:49,680
Speaker 1: and it doesn't itself based on gender. Does that make

744
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 1: sense to you, Yeah, it does. But I want to

745
00:41:52,239 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 1: push back and have a conversation in regard to that,

746
00:41:55,440 --> 00:41:58,120
Speaker 1: because as you're talking about that purple, the pink and

747
00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:01,200
Speaker 1: blue coming together again. Coming from a you know, a

748
00:42:01,239 --> 00:42:06,200
Speaker 1: sports background, I realized the the importance of team, the

749
00:42:06,239 --> 00:42:10,560
Speaker 1: importance of having different roles as a quarterback. You know,

750
00:42:10,600 --> 00:42:12,880
Speaker 1: I was never a quarterback, but my quarterback, you know,

751
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:15,319
Speaker 1: he gets the attention. He does all these I'm a

752
00:42:15,360 --> 00:42:18,880
Speaker 1: defensive lineman. We have two different jobs, but we're on

753
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:22,120
Speaker 1: the same team. And I feel like, and correctly if

754
00:42:22,120 --> 00:42:23,640
Speaker 1: you think that this is wrong or if I'm off

755
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:27,640
Speaker 1: chart here, but I feel like the purple mindset means

756
00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:32,120
Speaker 1: that it comes it stems from comparison. Well I'm doing this,

757
00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:33,960
Speaker 1: I'm doing that. I remember early in my marriage, my

758
00:42:33,960 --> 00:42:35,920
Speaker 1: wife was like, well, I'm at home doing this, that

759
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:37,520
Speaker 1: and the other. And I'm saying, well, I'm at work

760
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:40,000
Speaker 1: doing this, that and the other. And I was just like,

761
00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:44,040
Speaker 1: rather than comparing who's doing what and whose job is harder,

762
00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:47,279
Speaker 1: why don't we realize to be able to operate in

763
00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:51,440
Speaker 1: our strengths so that way we can service our family,

764
00:42:51,440 --> 00:42:54,279
Speaker 1: because that's the team unit. Because I think when I

765
00:42:54,280 --> 00:42:56,160
Speaker 1: try to do what my wife is doing, and if

766
00:42:56,160 --> 00:42:57,680
Speaker 1: I try to put the pressure for her to do

767
00:42:57,719 --> 00:43:00,719
Speaker 1: what I'm doing, I'm really taking away from what she

768
00:43:00,840 --> 00:43:04,400
Speaker 1: does best. She's taken away from like there's a there's

769
00:43:04,520 --> 00:43:07,279
Speaker 1: time to to make adjustments and change, say hey, look,

770
00:43:07,320 --> 00:43:09,279
Speaker 1: I need to lean in over here she might need

771
00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:11,359
Speaker 1: lean in on the other side. But I think when

772
00:43:11,400 --> 00:43:14,480
Speaker 1: you start making this making me into something that I'm not,

773
00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:16,920
Speaker 1: or making a man or a woman into something that

774
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:19,359
Speaker 1: they're not, and we're all designed differently, so it could

775
00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:21,759
Speaker 1: be reversed. So this it could be the woman is

776
00:43:21,800 --> 00:43:23,440
Speaker 1: the breadwin and the man is to stay at home.

777
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 1: So it has nothing to do with who's doing what

778
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:29,680
Speaker 1: as much as respecting what they do for the team.

779
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:32,920
Speaker 1: Does that make sense because purple, don't you think purple

780
00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:37,320
Speaker 1: is saying that essentially you're cutting yourself fifty fifty for

781
00:43:37,400 --> 00:43:38,880
Speaker 1: moos like you need to be doing that some of

782
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,160
Speaker 1: that and you need to be just so and boom

783
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:43,440
Speaker 1: there you go. Now, no, there are two different things.

784
00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:48,480
Speaker 1: So so you and your partner have have the strength

785
00:43:48,520 --> 00:43:50,200
Speaker 1: that you're good at, right, all the things that you

786
00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:51,839
Speaker 1: love to do and the things that you're really good

787
00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:55,000
Speaker 1: good at. Don't fix it. It's not broken. It's what

788
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:57,040
Speaker 1: you love to do. It's what your best. That you

789
00:43:57,120 --> 00:43:59,160
Speaker 1: work that out between the pair of you, that makes

790
00:43:59,160 --> 00:44:03,399
Speaker 1: you instinct it together. Then there then there are the

791
00:44:03,520 --> 00:44:09,160
Speaker 1: overall tasks, jobs, house chores that need to get done,

792
00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 1: and that incorporates work as well. As how you're raising

793
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:18,600
Speaker 1: the children and being productive with them. And this is

794
00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:23,759
Speaker 1: a time now where it's not defined by gender, like

795
00:44:23,880 --> 00:44:25,799
Speaker 1: while it's the man's job to do that or it's

796
00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:28,520
Speaker 1: the woman's job to do that, it's a moment of

797
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:32,400
Speaker 1: recognizing that it's a job and it needs to get done.

798
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:36,239
Speaker 1: So if you've worked out what your strengths are and

799
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:40,520
Speaker 1: where you are in sync, because it's just a given right,

800
00:44:41,120 --> 00:44:45,640
Speaker 1: then the purple jobs become tasks that need to get

801
00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:50,200
Speaker 1: done that do not identify themselves as a woman's role

802
00:44:50,480 --> 00:44:53,400
Speaker 1: or a man's role. And I'll give you an example

803
00:44:53,520 --> 00:44:56,320
Speaker 1: right now, because this is what I have been dealing

804
00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:59,600
Speaker 1: with a lot across America. We've just currently, you know,

805
00:45:00,280 --> 00:45:04,360
Speaker 1: because of COVID finished filming Supernanny, and I was helping

806
00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:09,040
Speaker 1: a family where the father was the breadwinner. And this

807
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:12,400
Speaker 1: family or an Instagram family where they make their money

808
00:45:12,480 --> 00:45:16,160
Speaker 1: from sponsors, you know, and they tell their family story

809
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:21,000
Speaker 1: and the mother generated a demographic that brought a lot

810
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:25,360
Speaker 1: of interest in sponsorship. So they worked out together. But

811
00:45:25,480 --> 00:45:27,960
Speaker 1: it would make sense that he was at home raising

812
00:45:27,960 --> 00:45:30,400
Speaker 1: the kids and that she was at work going into

813
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:34,919
Speaker 1: a space where she could do her work. However, they

814
00:45:34,920 --> 00:45:40,120
Speaker 1: had major internal conflict as a couple because in his

815
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:43,839
Speaker 1: mind he felt that he brought nothing and had no

816
00:45:44,120 --> 00:45:47,680
Speaker 1: value because how he had been raised was the value

817
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 1: himself based on what he could bring in monetary and

818
00:45:51,680 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 1: that money and that is what men are going through

819
00:45:56,080 --> 00:46:00,480
Speaker 1: right now as well, is the recognized is recognizing that

820
00:46:00,600 --> 00:46:05,520
Speaker 1: it has shifted over the years into a space that

821
00:46:05,719 --> 00:46:10,440
Speaker 1: men are learning to value themselves not just based on

822
00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:13,880
Speaker 1: whether they bring it in money or protect or provide,

823
00:46:14,320 --> 00:46:20,239
Speaker 1: but the emotional intelligence of how they are productive fathers

824
00:46:20,280 --> 00:46:22,799
Speaker 1: and husbands and the team, what that they bring in

825
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:27,879
Speaker 1: and not babysitting the kids. No, you're raising your kids.

826
00:46:27,960 --> 00:46:31,440
Speaker 1: You're not babysitting your own children. You're raising your children.

827
00:46:31,880 --> 00:46:37,360
Speaker 1: You are as valuable and as instrumental in their lives

828
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:42,120
Speaker 1: as their mother. You know, are we erasing some of

829
00:46:42,160 --> 00:46:44,600
Speaker 1: the paternal instincts because I've heard you said a couple

830
00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:50,399
Speaker 1: of times, um, you know, protector provider. I find that

831
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:53,080
Speaker 1: that is a a paternal in my opinion. I'm sure

832
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:56,080
Speaker 1: somebody will blast me about this, but in my opinion,

833
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:59,040
Speaker 1: I think that that's a paternal instinct. Like I'll never

834
00:46:59,040 --> 00:47:01,520
Speaker 1: forget what my wife to me that we were pregnant,

835
00:47:01,560 --> 00:47:05,600
Speaker 1: that she was pregnant with our twins. Um, the first

836
00:47:05,680 --> 00:47:09,000
Speaker 1: thing my brain went to was, Okay, how much am

837
00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:10,880
Speaker 1: I gonna need to work? How am I going to

838
00:47:10,920 --> 00:47:13,919
Speaker 1: protect them? And like my brain just she's thinking about something.

839
00:47:13,920 --> 00:47:16,120
Speaker 1: She's thinking about what why am I forgetting this in

840
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:17,759
Speaker 1: a couple of years and that was eight years since

841
00:47:17,760 --> 00:47:21,960
Speaker 1: we baby, when they nesting, he's thinking about what was

842
00:47:22,000 --> 00:47:24,720
Speaker 1: gonna look like? And this was all natural, no judgment,

843
00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:28,239
Speaker 1: like that was her thing. And I think that somehow,

844
00:47:28,840 --> 00:47:31,480
Speaker 1: you know, I think some of the conversations get into

845
00:47:31,520 --> 00:47:33,759
Speaker 1: almost and I've had these conversations with a lot of

846
00:47:33,760 --> 00:47:37,080
Speaker 1: my men, my guy friends, and that you know, you

847
00:47:37,160 --> 00:47:40,640
Speaker 1: almost start to feel bad for having a protective mindset

848
00:47:40,880 --> 00:47:43,839
Speaker 1: or a provider mindset, like that's not a good thing.

849
00:47:43,960 --> 00:47:47,640
Speaker 1: Like and again I think it comes from a comparison thing.

850
00:47:47,719 --> 00:47:52,839
Speaker 1: But like you said, no, no, nobody should, you know,

851
00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:56,200
Speaker 1: nobody should feel bad for that. That's like saying that's

852
00:47:56,280 --> 00:48:01,520
Speaker 1: like saying a single, a single fun other raising his

853
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:06,000
Speaker 1: children should feel bad because he does what might be

854
00:48:06,239 --> 00:48:11,759
Speaker 1: seen as a feminine energy, right or maternal energy with

855
00:48:11,920 --> 00:48:15,480
Speaker 1: his children. Right. We're now we're now come into a

856
00:48:15,520 --> 00:48:21,839
Speaker 1: space where men are expressing themselves emotionally more. We are

857
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 1: understanding importance of men not raising their boys just to

858
00:48:26,320 --> 00:48:29,360
Speaker 1: play the dumper trucks and trains, But do I actually

859
00:48:29,640 --> 00:48:33,640
Speaker 1: push a baby around and make home right? And I

860
00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:37,680
Speaker 1: think that's really important. I also think it's incredibly important

861
00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:41,480
Speaker 1: in different cultures as well as an African American men,

862
00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:43,920
Speaker 1: I think that's important. You know, I'm married to an

863
00:48:43,960 --> 00:48:46,879
Speaker 1: African American man, you know, and when I look at

864
00:48:46,960 --> 00:48:49,840
Speaker 1: the culture and you know, how he was raised and

865
00:48:49,960 --> 00:48:52,560
Speaker 1: his father and I, you know, and I talked to

866
00:48:52,760 --> 00:48:57,160
Speaker 1: the black community, I think there's there's much growth there

867
00:48:57,200 --> 00:49:01,239
Speaker 1: as well, and understanding that actually, you know, men are

868
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:05,680
Speaker 1: breaking through in many wonderful ways that they can still

869
00:49:05,840 --> 00:49:09,960
Speaker 1: own how they feel innately to provide a place what

870
00:49:10,040 --> 00:49:13,600
Speaker 1: was wired, but to also encourage, you know, their young

871
00:49:13,680 --> 00:49:16,359
Speaker 1: boys to know that they will brought up to be men,

872
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:22,520
Speaker 1: who will be feminists, who will who will have compassion

873
00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:28,719
Speaker 1: and um certainly this caring side of them that is

874
00:49:28,760 --> 00:49:32,520
Speaker 1: shown from a very a very young age. Because toys

875
00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:37,080
Speaker 1: are toys and they're not boys or girls. Boy can

876
00:49:37,239 --> 00:49:41,120
Speaker 1: push a baby around in a in a pram and

877
00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:44,640
Speaker 1: play home and make home and not be seen as

878
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:48,600
Speaker 1: it's something that is a girl thing to do. Keep it,

879
00:49:48,800 --> 00:49:50,880
Speaker 1: let me keep it real with you. I tend to

880
00:49:51,080 --> 00:49:52,960
Speaker 1: and I'm just going again, I'm sure people will blast

881
00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:56,520
Speaker 1: me on this. Always preface these things because social media

882
00:49:56,560 --> 00:49:58,879
Speaker 1: will just go the I can't believe you're such a better.

883
00:49:59,680 --> 00:50:02,000
Speaker 1: I don't let my son in that manner, like if

884
00:50:02,000 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 1: he picks up like he's got you know, two sisters, right,

885
00:50:04,520 --> 00:50:06,160
Speaker 1: I mean he'll play, you know, my play with his

886
00:50:06,239 --> 00:50:08,720
Speaker 1: sister or whatever. But I won't let my son push

887
00:50:08,760 --> 00:50:12,840
Speaker 1: around it all. And uh, you know, I play because

888
00:50:13,239 --> 00:50:15,800
Speaker 1: to me, I think that there's more of an emphasis

889
00:50:15,880 --> 00:50:20,279
Speaker 1: on And I had these conversations where somehow the man

890
00:50:20,400 --> 00:50:23,920
Speaker 1: has to kind of move in the direction of and

891
00:50:23,920 --> 00:50:26,520
Speaker 1: I'm putting in an air quotes here, move towards more

892
00:50:26,520 --> 00:50:29,160
Speaker 1: of the feminine quality. Um. And again I put that

893
00:50:29,200 --> 00:50:32,480
Speaker 1: in air quotes, um, whereas it's not the same really

894
00:50:32,600 --> 00:50:36,000
Speaker 1: on the other end, it's not the reverse like that's

895
00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:38,960
Speaker 1: kind of more seen as a pushback if you know,

896
00:50:39,040 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 1: you were to reverse that and going, hey, it should

897
00:50:41,560 --> 00:50:43,440
Speaker 1: be more this way. And I just think that there's

898
00:50:43,840 --> 00:50:47,680
Speaker 1: there's things emasculating a man and if that if that

899
00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:51,520
Speaker 1: term really exists like, he has to show more feminine qualities,

900
00:50:51,719 --> 00:50:54,279
Speaker 1: He has to be more understanding, he has to be

901
00:50:54,320 --> 00:50:56,200
Speaker 1: like you. You you've kind of tapped on it where

902
00:50:56,480 --> 00:50:59,759
Speaker 1: you know his emotional intelligence, but is the underlying there

903
00:51:00,520 --> 00:51:08,480
Speaker 1: he's emotionally growing, meaning that what like meaning he's there

904
00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:12,239
Speaker 1: is there is a there's enough scientific data as well

905
00:51:12,280 --> 00:51:17,400
Speaker 1: as through experiments, social experiments that show that if children

906
00:51:17,719 --> 00:51:23,040
Speaker 1: both sexes are encouraged to just see toys as toys

907
00:51:23,520 --> 00:51:28,200
Speaker 1: and play home and make home, it doesn't it doesn't

908
00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:36,880
Speaker 1: hinder a boy's a boy's temperament or what their DNA

909
00:51:37,120 --> 00:51:40,080
Speaker 1: is if they're competitive, that's about temperament. If you have

910
00:51:40,280 --> 00:51:44,960
Speaker 1: a competitive temperament, or if you have you know, the

911
00:51:45,080 --> 00:51:48,080
Speaker 1: DNA of you know, your mother or your father, meaning

912
00:51:48,120 --> 00:51:50,759
Speaker 1: you'll say, well, you're like your father because you know

913
00:51:50,880 --> 00:51:55,200
Speaker 1: he shows characteristic traits that way, that's DNA. But how

914
00:51:55,400 --> 00:52:01,399
Speaker 1: we how we shape and teach Emperor Fee is through

915
00:52:01,480 --> 00:52:05,839
Speaker 1: showing kindness and care, and that has been seen predominantly

916
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:10,080
Speaker 1: as a feminine energy, as something that little girls should do.

917
00:52:10,360 --> 00:52:13,919
Speaker 1: If we can raise our boys to have both, then

918
00:52:13,920 --> 00:52:16,480
Speaker 1: we will raise them to become young men who will,

919
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:19,279
Speaker 1: you know, put themselves in other people's shoes, who will

920
00:52:19,320 --> 00:52:23,360
Speaker 1: be more empathetic. That won't take away competitiveness at all,

921
00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:26,080
Speaker 1: you know, or the or the or the need and

922
00:52:26,160 --> 00:52:29,480
Speaker 1: the drive to be motivated to be successful in whatever

923
00:52:29,520 --> 00:52:33,160
Speaker 1: you do. But it does instill empathy, and we all

924
00:52:33,160 --> 00:52:36,719
Speaker 1: need more empathy in this world. It also teaches young

925
00:52:36,760 --> 00:52:41,360
Speaker 1: boys to express more, to be you'll eat or anything

926
00:52:41,440 --> 00:52:43,799
Speaker 1: like that, you know, but to look, we're going through

927
00:52:43,800 --> 00:52:46,840
Speaker 1: a mental health stigma right now. We know suicide is

928
00:52:46,880 --> 00:52:52,520
Speaker 1: really high amongst young men, and fathers find it really difficult,

929
00:52:52,680 --> 00:52:55,759
Speaker 1: even though we're seeing progress now to be able to

930
00:52:55,800 --> 00:52:59,680
Speaker 1: turn around and say to their sports chump, hey boy,

931
00:52:59,840 --> 00:53:02,640
Speaker 1: I just I spent all day crying last night because

932
00:53:02,719 --> 00:53:05,400
Speaker 1: my wife said something that really made me think about something,

933
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:08,680
Speaker 1: and because they're all thinking. But then you're gonna look

934
00:53:08,719 --> 00:53:11,760
Speaker 1: at him and go like, what's that. We're here, right,

935
00:53:12,040 --> 00:53:15,560
Speaker 1: We're gonna bread for that to be okay. And I'm

936
00:53:15,560 --> 00:53:18,920
Speaker 1: an emotional guy and I've had conversations with my wife

937
00:53:18,920 --> 00:53:21,920
Speaker 1: where you know, like I will you know, and and

938
00:53:21,960 --> 00:53:24,719
Speaker 1: again this is conversations that you hear all the time,

939
00:53:24,760 --> 00:53:28,840
Speaker 1: Like if I'm more expressive about my emotional state, it

940
00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:31,880
Speaker 1: sometimes may not carry overwell, and I've heard from a

941
00:53:31,880 --> 00:53:35,120
Speaker 1: lot of my guy friends like how much conflict that

942
00:53:35,160 --> 00:53:38,200
Speaker 1: causes in the house, Like the woman has the ability

943
00:53:38,239 --> 00:53:42,600
Speaker 1: to be more expressive about her feelings, um, and the

944
00:53:42,640 --> 00:53:46,200
Speaker 1: man is supposed to listen, be more empathic, whereas when

945
00:53:46,200 --> 00:53:49,160
Speaker 1: it's reversed, it's going And I think that's part of

946
00:53:49,160 --> 00:53:52,960
Speaker 1: the conditioning and how you know we we were raised

947
00:53:53,440 --> 00:53:55,719
Speaker 1: is when you know again just from some of the

948
00:53:55,719 --> 00:53:59,680
Speaker 1: conversations that I've had that when the man is expressive,

949
00:53:59,760 --> 00:54:02,239
Speaker 1: it's it's like ho ho, hold on, like almost like

950
00:54:02,280 --> 00:54:07,600
Speaker 1: there's not enough room for and what you know, like

951
00:54:07,640 --> 00:54:09,799
Speaker 1: that I have to be the emotional one. You have

952
00:54:09,920 --> 00:54:12,719
Speaker 1: to listen and then everything else you just need you

953
00:54:12,760 --> 00:54:15,279
Speaker 1: need to just process that yourself because you're a man,

954
00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:18,080
Speaker 1: you're not supposed to have those feelings. But guess what happens.

955
00:54:18,960 --> 00:54:22,200
Speaker 1: Then women have work to do. Then women have much

956
00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:25,239
Speaker 1: work to do to bring men into a space of

957
00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:31,600
Speaker 1: recognizing that vulnerability is not weakness. You emotionally feeling how

958
00:54:31,680 --> 00:54:37,040
Speaker 1: you feel will only create more emotional more emotional intimacy.

959
00:54:37,280 --> 00:54:40,120
Speaker 1: Women can't have it both ways. They can't turn around

960
00:54:40,160 --> 00:54:42,680
Speaker 1: and say, well, we we don't want you to feel

961
00:54:42,800 --> 00:54:44,680
Speaker 1: or please don't share it with us. You want, we

962
00:54:44,719 --> 00:54:47,680
Speaker 1: want you to fix things and to get the job done.

963
00:54:48,440 --> 00:54:50,360
Speaker 1: But at the end of the day, hey, I'm feeling

964
00:54:50,400 --> 00:54:53,319
Speaker 1: like we're a bit distant. I'm feeling like emotionally you

965
00:54:53,400 --> 00:54:56,319
Speaker 1: don't you don't say anything, you don't get me, you

966
00:54:56,400 --> 00:54:59,120
Speaker 1: don't talk and say anything. You can't have it both ways,

967
00:54:59,520 --> 00:55:03,120
Speaker 1: you know, think it's important for women to understand that

968
00:55:03,200 --> 00:55:07,480
Speaker 1: if you want emotional intimacy with your man, and I'm

969
00:55:07,480 --> 00:55:10,480
Speaker 1: not talking about sexual, I'm talking about on an emotional

970
00:55:10,560 --> 00:55:14,080
Speaker 1: intimate level where you feel heard, where you feel but

971
00:55:14,200 --> 00:55:17,279
Speaker 1: you have the trust where you can truly talk to

972
00:55:17,360 --> 00:55:20,560
Speaker 1: one another about how each other a feeling. Because men

973
00:55:20,640 --> 00:55:23,319
Speaker 1: need that too. Then you've got to do a lot

974
00:55:23,320 --> 00:55:26,799
Speaker 1: of guys saying A lot of my guys wouldn't say that.

975
00:55:26,840 --> 00:55:30,000
Speaker 1: They don't go there. You know, there's this old idea

976
00:55:30,080 --> 00:55:32,160
Speaker 1: that men are you know, they don't talk much and

977
00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:34,359
Speaker 1: they don't say much, and a lot of it has

978
00:55:34,400 --> 00:55:37,319
Speaker 1: to be comes from the ideas like they want to.

979
00:55:37,480 --> 00:55:41,000
Speaker 1: But the minute they start speaking, that's when the biggest

980
00:55:41,200 --> 00:55:44,040
Speaker 1: eruption happened in the household. That's when a lot of

981
00:55:44,040 --> 00:55:47,520
Speaker 1: the confusion and the argument happened is when they feel

982
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:49,960
Speaker 1: like if I speak up on this, she's going to

983
00:55:50,000 --> 00:55:52,440
Speaker 1: take it as personal, like it's a personal thing. But

984
00:55:52,520 --> 00:55:56,799
Speaker 1: when she speaks, it's more or less like I have

985
00:55:56,920 --> 00:55:59,520
Speaker 1: to listen. I have to be you know, I have

986
00:55:59,600 --> 00:56:02,240
Speaker 1: to fix it. I have to you know, recognize my actions.

987
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:05,000
Speaker 1: And that's it, Like that's, oh, that's a good husband.

988
00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:09,000
Speaker 1: He listened. But when when the husband speaks, then it's

989
00:56:09,040 --> 00:56:10,600
Speaker 1: just like how do we get around there? Because it's

990
00:56:10,640 --> 00:56:13,640
Speaker 1: like like I'm apprehensive to say anything because if I

991
00:56:13,680 --> 00:56:16,160
Speaker 1: say anything that I know is going to cause a problem.

992
00:56:16,480 --> 00:56:18,960
Speaker 1: Here's what I think the number one tip for that

993
00:56:19,040 --> 00:56:22,440
Speaker 1: communication is is to validate what you're here in First,

994
00:56:22,800 --> 00:56:27,440
Speaker 1: if your job is to listen from your wife, then listen,

995
00:56:28,320 --> 00:56:34,800
Speaker 1: and when you respond, validate mirror what you've heard. Mirror

996
00:56:34,800 --> 00:56:38,840
Speaker 1: what was said in that conversation so that your wife

997
00:56:39,080 --> 00:56:43,840
Speaker 1: feels heard that you heard what she said and validate that.

998
00:56:44,760 --> 00:56:47,720
Speaker 1: And once you have opened up the gate to mirror

999
00:56:47,760 --> 00:56:52,680
Speaker 1: what has been said, like I'm really sorry that you

1000
00:56:52,800 --> 00:56:56,680
Speaker 1: feel that you you had so much on your shoulders

1001
00:56:56,800 --> 00:57:00,759
Speaker 1: right now, because that must feel really heavy for you

1002
00:57:00,880 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 1: and very tiring, and you have a long day because

1003
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:08,840
Speaker 1: you're raising the kids, you know, all day and doing

1004
00:57:08,840 --> 00:57:11,880
Speaker 1: the teaching with them, and then you know you're getting

1005
00:57:11,920 --> 00:57:15,319
Speaker 1: dinner ready tonight as well, So you know, I can

1006
00:57:15,400 --> 00:57:19,400
Speaker 1: imagine how difficult that must feel for you, and I'm

1007
00:57:19,440 --> 00:57:23,680
Speaker 1: really sorry you're feeling this way. You know, it's about listening,

1008
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:28,760
Speaker 1: mirroring what's being said, and then validating it. The straight away.

1009
00:57:28,920 --> 00:57:32,480
Speaker 1: What happens is you the men you come from a

1010
00:57:32,480 --> 00:57:37,200
Speaker 1: stance they're not defending, but truly listening, and your wife

1011
00:57:37,240 --> 00:57:40,920
Speaker 1: will feel like you heard, and that will stop her

1012
00:57:41,000 --> 00:57:43,800
Speaker 1: from having that sword and shield up. Because if a

1013
00:57:43,880 --> 00:57:46,400
Speaker 1: woman talks to a man and he listens, and his

1014
00:57:46,600 --> 00:57:51,040
Speaker 1: only response is the go to that defends himself rather

1015
00:57:51,120 --> 00:57:55,000
Speaker 1: than to diffuse and to show that he truly did

1016
00:57:55,080 --> 00:57:59,560
Speaker 1: hear from mirroring and then validating, then you're going to

1017
00:57:59,640 --> 00:58:03,360
Speaker 1: have to few up with sword and shield, right Whereas

1018
00:58:03,440 --> 00:58:08,760
Speaker 1: if the man can here validate and then defuse the circumstance,

1019
00:58:08,840 --> 00:58:13,160
Speaker 1: because the woman will be like, huh, okay, he heard me,

1020
00:58:14,440 --> 00:58:17,160
Speaker 1: you can then fal I would I would assume that

1021
00:58:17,240 --> 00:58:20,920
Speaker 1: it's the reverse as well, because in that way, what

1022
00:58:21,000 --> 00:58:23,760
Speaker 1: you're talking about totally agree with you, and that being

1023
00:58:23,800 --> 00:58:26,560
Speaker 1: able to listen and understand that. But what happens when

1024
00:58:26,600 --> 00:58:29,280
Speaker 1: the man identifies a problem because it's you know that

1025
00:58:29,400 --> 00:58:32,040
Speaker 1: from where you're talking about, identifies that the woman will

1026
00:58:32,040 --> 00:58:34,240
Speaker 1: automatically come up with it first, and then the man

1027
00:58:34,400 --> 00:58:36,280
Speaker 1: is kind of reacting to what she's saying. But what

1028
00:58:36,360 --> 00:58:39,120
Speaker 1: happens when a man wants to engage in a conversation

1029
00:58:39,240 --> 00:58:43,040
Speaker 1: first and identify an issue where he's feeling something about

1030
00:58:44,040 --> 00:58:46,840
Speaker 1: the relationship or whatever the problem might be, whether it's

1031
00:58:46,880 --> 00:58:49,160
Speaker 1: back to school with the kids and how things are

1032
00:58:49,160 --> 00:58:51,840
Speaker 1: moving in the house, Like, how does a man address

1033
00:58:51,920 --> 00:58:54,840
Speaker 1: that without because most not most, I don't say that.

1034
00:58:55,200 --> 00:58:59,080
Speaker 1: A lot of men a man well knowing that the

1035
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:02,600
Speaker 1: minute they say something is wrong, the woman might take

1036
00:59:02,640 --> 00:59:05,880
Speaker 1: it as personal and saying I'm not good enough, I'm

1037
00:59:05,880 --> 00:59:07,840
Speaker 1: not doing the you know, a good job, and then

1038
00:59:07,840 --> 00:59:10,680
Speaker 1: it just kind of breaks away. Nothing. Nothing is wrong

1039
00:59:10,680 --> 00:59:13,800
Speaker 1: that a man feels nothing. Number one. So if there

1040
00:59:13,840 --> 00:59:17,160
Speaker 1: any women listening to this, you know, there is nothing

1041
00:59:17,240 --> 00:59:20,920
Speaker 1: that a man can say if he's expressed in himself

1042
00:59:20,920 --> 00:59:24,080
Speaker 1: that is wrong because it's how he feels and he

1043
00:59:24,120 --> 00:59:27,640
Speaker 1: owns those feelings, and none of us are here to

1044
00:59:27,760 --> 00:59:30,400
Speaker 1: be able to say I will minimize how a man

1045
00:59:30,520 --> 00:59:33,440
Speaker 1: feels when he's expressing himself. If you've got to a

1046
00:59:33,480 --> 00:59:36,520
Speaker 1: place where your man actually feels comfortable doing that, then

1047
00:59:36,560 --> 00:59:40,640
Speaker 1: you're doing something right. However, what I will tell you

1048
00:59:41,160 --> 00:59:43,920
Speaker 1: is what I will tell you in those circumstances is

1049
00:59:43,960 --> 00:59:49,400
Speaker 1: the more we can practice as as couples, the more

1050
00:59:49,480 --> 00:59:54,560
Speaker 1: we can practice in having conversation where we neutralize and

1051
00:59:54,640 --> 00:59:59,360
Speaker 1: see it as each other looking at solution rather than

1052
00:59:59,520 --> 01:00:03,880
Speaker 1: finger pointing right, the better the outcome. So I use,

1053
01:00:04,240 --> 01:00:07,400
Speaker 1: for example, with couples, I've used a box. I literally

1054
01:00:07,440 --> 01:00:11,720
Speaker 1: took objectively a box with plat parts and wrote them

1055
01:00:11,760 --> 01:00:15,200
Speaker 1: down so that there was no tongue to be judged,

1056
01:00:15,840 --> 01:00:20,280
Speaker 1: no eye contact or body language that could be mistewed

1057
01:00:20,440 --> 01:00:24,520
Speaker 1: in any way, and that you simply wrote the problem

1058
01:00:24,600 --> 01:00:28,760
Speaker 1: down and put it in the box. And twice a week.

1059
01:00:29,120 --> 01:00:31,680
Speaker 1: That led to then three times a week that led

1060
01:00:31,720 --> 01:00:34,760
Speaker 1: to the then four times you opened up the box

1061
01:00:34,800 --> 01:00:36,320
Speaker 1: together and said, right, let's take a look at these

1062
01:00:36,360 --> 01:00:38,720
Speaker 1: problems and let's look at how we're going to solve

1063
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:43,520
Speaker 1: them together. Because it's not just what you say, it's

1064
01:00:43,520 --> 01:00:46,480
Speaker 1: how you say it, the delivery when you say it,

1065
01:00:47,280 --> 01:00:52,919
Speaker 1: and it's also your body because that is your body

1066
01:00:53,000 --> 01:00:56,840
Speaker 1: language in when and how you convey the message that

1067
01:00:56,880 --> 01:00:59,520
Speaker 1: you want to put across to your partner. So if

1068
01:00:59,520 --> 01:01:03,680
Speaker 1: you make an objective by putting those in a card together,

1069
01:01:03,920 --> 01:01:05,800
Speaker 1: you both go right, let's take a look and see

1070
01:01:05,880 --> 01:01:08,600
Speaker 1: what's in here, and let's work together to solve these issues.

1071
01:01:09,800 --> 01:01:12,480
Speaker 1: You won't sue me if I decided to steal that

1072
01:01:12,720 --> 01:01:16,200
Speaker 1: and use it in my household. I hope you do.

1073
01:01:16,360 --> 01:01:21,280
Speaker 1: I hope you do. It's been very productive and it's

1074
01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:25,040
Speaker 1: been very successful for a lot of couples to be

1075
01:01:25,120 --> 01:01:27,480
Speaker 1: able to do that. And the fact is is once

1076
01:01:27,560 --> 01:01:30,760
Speaker 1: you once you do that, it's not the box that's

1077
01:01:30,760 --> 01:01:33,880
Speaker 1: the magic. It's the fact that you both came together

1078
01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:37,360
Speaker 1: with an open heart of saying, look, there's no room

1079
01:01:37,440 --> 01:01:40,680
Speaker 1: for ego here for me to feel slighted and to

1080
01:01:40,760 --> 01:01:44,000
Speaker 1: get touchy and to take it personal. If we're to

1081
01:01:44,160 --> 01:01:47,920
Speaker 1: resolve these issues together, then let's look at it together

1082
01:01:48,480 --> 01:01:52,160
Speaker 1: and let's recognize that what's being said in a pragmatic

1083
01:01:52,200 --> 01:01:54,959
Speaker 1: way is about how we solve the issues. That way,

1084
01:01:55,000 --> 01:01:58,560
Speaker 1: you can take the ego out the room, because if

1085
01:01:58,600 --> 01:02:03,920
Speaker 1: you're talking to somebody who's continuously feel inslighted or victimized,

1086
01:02:04,280 --> 01:02:08,120
Speaker 1: or the tone that you said it or defensive, they're

1087
01:02:08,160 --> 01:02:12,960
Speaker 1: just poison arrows in a marriage that leads to bitterness

1088
01:02:13,040 --> 01:02:17,880
Speaker 1: and resentment. And that's a hard place to come back from.

1089
01:02:17,920 --> 01:02:22,520
Speaker 1: And it's why we're seeing so many divorces right now.

1090
01:02:22,560 --> 01:02:24,720
Speaker 1: I mean, that's what we're seeing a lot of divorces

1091
01:02:24,840 --> 01:02:27,360
Speaker 1: right now. And I believe in the marriage, you know.

1092
01:02:27,440 --> 01:02:30,520
Speaker 1: I believe in the institution of marriage, you know. And

1093
01:02:30,560 --> 01:02:34,880
Speaker 1: I believe in the importance of you know, working things

1094
01:02:34,920 --> 01:02:38,760
Speaker 1: through and that in a healthy way. Right That's not

1095
01:02:38,840 --> 01:02:43,720
Speaker 1: to ignore or to tolerate abuse or any form of

1096
01:02:43,920 --> 01:02:48,400
Speaker 1: toxic relationship, but I think it's about time these conversations

1097
01:02:48,440 --> 01:02:52,520
Speaker 1: were happening in a very organic, consistent way. Look, we

1098
01:02:52,640 --> 01:02:56,920
Speaker 1: saw Will Smith and Jada Pinkett bring on the Red

1099
01:02:56,960 --> 01:03:03,040
Speaker 1: Table talk. How could you not love that? Oh my gosh, Okay,

1100
01:03:03,080 --> 01:03:04,560
Speaker 1: don't even give me something. I don't want to pick

1101
01:03:04,560 --> 01:03:08,480
Speaker 1: this too, you know what it was? Okay, let me

1102
01:03:08,520 --> 01:03:10,680
Speaker 1: just say this please. I mean, I know the producers

1103
01:03:10,640 --> 01:03:12,080
Speaker 1: said we're gonna wrap this up. Let me tell you

1104
01:03:12,080 --> 01:03:15,840
Speaker 1: something that was so amazing because it was so transparent,

1105
01:03:15,880 --> 01:03:18,640
Speaker 1: it was so real. You don't see anyone in Hollywood

1106
01:03:18,640 --> 01:03:22,280
Speaker 1: giving that level or that that type of insight. Look,

1107
01:03:22,280 --> 01:03:23,680
Speaker 1: and I'm sure there are a lot of people who've

1108
01:03:23,680 --> 01:03:26,960
Speaker 1: got things to say in the judgment. But one of

1109
01:03:26,960 --> 01:03:28,920
Speaker 1: my favorite things from that whole Things and there was

1110
01:03:29,000 --> 01:03:31,680
Speaker 1: like bad Marriage for Life, kind of a playoff of

1111
01:03:31,720 --> 01:03:34,600
Speaker 1: the Bad Boys for Life. I think what it is

1112
01:03:34,640 --> 01:03:36,640
Speaker 1: to me what I heard when I heard that was

1113
01:03:37,120 --> 01:03:42,880
Speaker 1: reasonable expectations. Look, marriage is hard as hell and things,

1114
01:03:42,920 --> 01:03:45,040
Speaker 1: because I think what happens is there's this over sale

1115
01:03:45,200 --> 01:03:47,800
Speaker 1: on the glamor and the beauty and the wedding and

1116
01:03:47,840 --> 01:03:50,560
Speaker 1: the road and everything is perfect and when you get

1117
01:03:50,600 --> 01:03:53,160
Speaker 1: into it, you're like, gosh, I've never I've not reached

1118
01:03:53,200 --> 01:03:56,560
Speaker 1: this perfection or this I think it's learning how to

1119
01:03:56,920 --> 01:03:58,480
Speaker 1: kind of like the show that I that I house

1120
01:03:58,560 --> 01:04:01,880
Speaker 1: with American Injin Warriors. Just it's one obstacle after the

1121
01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:05,760
Speaker 1: next obstacle. Yeah, and it's not happily ever after, it's

1122
01:04:05,760 --> 01:04:11,920
Speaker 1: happily working on it happily. Come on, come on, Joe,

1123
01:04:12,440 --> 01:04:17,280
Speaker 1: come on, come on, you're killing all right. Well, let

1124
01:04:17,320 --> 01:04:19,880
Speaker 1: me tell you something. Look, I I could talk to

1125
01:04:19,920 --> 01:04:22,240
Speaker 1: you for another hour. In fact, I'm gonna put you

1126
01:04:22,240 --> 01:04:24,800
Speaker 1: on a jet from wherever you are, hopefully your local time,

1127
01:04:26,240 --> 01:04:28,640
Speaker 1: and I'm going to bring you to my house and

1128
01:04:29,000 --> 01:04:32,120
Speaker 1: you'll be the super Therapist and the Supernanny as well.

1129
01:04:32,240 --> 01:04:34,800
Speaker 1: So I just want to thank you so much, um,

1130
01:04:35,000 --> 01:04:37,320
Speaker 1: and and look and for all those listeners. If you

1131
01:04:37,320 --> 01:04:39,280
Speaker 1: don't know Joe Frost, of course I think you already

1132
01:04:39,280 --> 01:04:43,000
Speaker 1: do know her. But remember Supernanny returns to Lifetime on

1133
01:04:43,080 --> 01:04:47,040
Speaker 1: September one. She's back in action. Joe Frost, thank you

1134
01:04:47,120 --> 01:04:50,400
Speaker 1: so much. This has really been an eye opener. Um.

1135
01:04:50,440 --> 01:04:52,240
Speaker 1: I've got a lot to digest. I've got a lot

1136
01:04:52,280 --> 01:04:54,640
Speaker 1: to digest from what we just talked to here today,

1137
01:04:54,680 --> 01:05:05,160
Speaker 1: So thank you so much. It mhm, well that was fun.

1138
01:05:05,320 --> 01:05:08,240
Speaker 1: What a stack show we had today. We had Jerry O'Connor,

1139
01:05:08,320 --> 01:05:12,880
Speaker 1: we had Alfonso Ribeiro and Joe Frost. Uh, so much

1140
01:05:13,040 --> 01:05:15,840
Speaker 1: to digest from all of those conversations. I want to say,

1141
01:05:16,040 --> 01:05:19,680
Speaker 1: first off, a big, big time thank you to both

1142
01:05:19,760 --> 01:05:23,200
Speaker 1: Brooks and Gavin for and host How Men Think. I

1143
01:05:23,280 --> 01:05:26,360
Speaker 1: hope you guys learned a lot, had a little bit

1144
01:05:26,400 --> 01:05:28,080
Speaker 1: more of an inside is how men think, at least

1145
01:05:28,080 --> 01:05:32,800
Speaker 1: how I think. But anyways, joining us for more shows

1146
01:05:32,960 --> 01:05:33,800
Speaker 1: on how men think.