WEBVTT - Drop the Mic with Chef Wes Lieberher 0:00:09.080 --> 0:00:10.160 Welcome to the Good Stuff. 0:00:10.240 --> 0:00:12.360 I'm Jacob Shick and I'm joined by my co host 0:00:12.360 --> 0:00:13.680 and wife, Ashley Shick. 0:00:14.360 --> 0:00:17.000 Jake is a third generation combat Marine and I'm a 0:00:17.000 --> 0:00:20.919 gold Star granddaughter. We work together to serve military veterans, 0:00:20.960 --> 0:00:24.920 first responders, frontline healthcare workers, and their families with mental 0:00:24.960 --> 0:00:28.720 and emotional wellness through traditional and non traditional therapy. At 0:00:28.760 --> 0:00:30.840 One Tribe Foundation, we. 0:00:30.840 --> 0:00:33.320 Believe everyone has a story to tell, not only about 0:00:33.320 --> 0:00:35.519 the peaks, but also the valleys they've been through to 0:00:35.560 --> 0:00:36.839 get them to where they are today. 0:00:37.240 --> 0:00:39.920 Each week, we invite a guest to tell us their story, 0:00:39.960 --> 0:00:42.400 to share with us the lessons they've learned that shaped 0:00:42.440 --> 0:00:44.320 who they are and what they're doing to pay it 0:00:44.360 --> 0:00:45.680 forward and give back. 0:00:46.320 --> 0:00:48.280 Our mission with this show is to dig deep into 0:00:48.320 --> 0:00:50.720 our guest's journey so that we can celebrate the hope 0:00:50.800 --> 0:00:52.920 and inspiration their story has to offer. 0:00:53.280 --> 0:00:55.480 We're thrilled you're joining us again. 0:00:55.920 --> 0:00:59.959 Welcome to the Good Stuff. Today, we're joined by celebrating 0:01:00.160 --> 0:01:03.960 Chef Wes Leeberherd. Chef West has made his mark on 0:01:03.960 --> 0:01:07.880 the culinary world in Philadelphia, Los Angeles, Germany, and now 0:01:07.880 --> 0:01:11.080 in Illinois. You may have seen him featured in diners, 0:01:11.200 --> 0:01:13.880 drive ins, and dives for his infamous menu at Beer 0:01:13.920 --> 0:01:17.720 Belly in LA's k Town. He's also made multiple appearances 0:01:17.720 --> 0:01:20.360 on The Food Network, the Travel Channel, and ABC. 0:01:20.920 --> 0:01:23.440 But before Wes embraced his skills in the kitchen, he 0:01:23.480 --> 0:01:25.360 grew up in the punk rock scene of Philly in 0:01:25.400 --> 0:01:28.320 the early nineties. This took him down a wild road 0:01:28.319 --> 0:01:30.520 which led him to being the lead singer in the 0:01:30.520 --> 0:01:33.640 band Kill Verona. This punk rock life meant that the 0:01:33.720 --> 0:01:36.120 volume was maxed out to the extreme, and at a 0:01:36.160 --> 0:01:39.240 critical juncture in his career, West developed Tonightis. 0:01:40.560 --> 0:01:43.640 For anyone who doesn't know tonightas is an uncontrollable ringing 0:01:43.680 --> 0:01:46.160 in their ears, and it's the gift that keeps on giving. 0:01:46.160 --> 0:01:48.240 In a very negative light, there. 0:01:48.120 --> 0:01:48.800 Is no cure. 0:01:49.200 --> 0:01:52.640 This condition pushed West to the edge literally and it 0:01:52.760 --> 0:01:54.960 almost caused him to take his own life. 0:01:55.120 --> 0:01:57.320 Today, Chef West is here to tell the story of 0:01:57.360 --> 0:01:59.960 his rock and roll adventures and how Tonightis robbed him 0:02:00.120 --> 0:02:02.760 of his dreams, drove him to the brink of suicide, 0:02:02.840 --> 0:02:05.480 and then eventually led him to a life full of 0:02:05.560 --> 0:02:08.680 great food, beautiful children, and his amazing wife. 0:02:08.720 --> 0:02:12.679 Free This dude is awesome. We can't wait for you 0:02:12.760 --> 0:02:13.600 to hear his story. 0:02:18.960 --> 0:02:22.919 We are so excited to have Chef wes Leeberher with 0:02:23.000 --> 0:02:23.600 us today. 0:02:23.720 --> 0:02:26.600 Chef, welcome to the good stuff. Thank you, it's good 0:02:26.600 --> 0:02:27.080 to be here. 0:02:27.960 --> 0:02:31.160 Tell us about growing up in your house in North Philly. 0:02:31.800 --> 0:02:35.400 Oh man, My childhood was rough. You know. It's crazy 0:02:35.440 --> 0:02:37.680 when you get older, you know, you look back and 0:02:37.680 --> 0:02:41.600 there's you try to remember, like details. I always think 0:02:41.639 --> 0:02:43.280 about with my kids. I'm like, are they going to 0:02:43.280 --> 0:02:46.000 remember this? I try to give him experiences that they'll remember, 0:02:46.639 --> 0:02:50.280 and most of the stuff I remember isn't good. So 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:53.960 my dad was a cop. He became a police officer 0:02:54.000 --> 0:02:56.800 when I was one. I think the job made him 0:02:56.800 --> 0:03:00.000 a little untrusting and angry. You know, he's going out, 0:03:00.160 --> 0:03:02.360 he's dealing with the scum of the earth every day. 0:03:03.000 --> 0:03:05.880 For the most part, him and my mom were getting along, 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:09.280 so there was a lot of violent yelling. I was 0:03:09.320 --> 0:03:12.040 never abused, which is great, but the relationship between my 0:03:12.120 --> 0:03:14.600 dad and my mom was pretty horrible. Then he cheated 0:03:14.639 --> 0:03:17.960 on her and left. Even after he had left the house, 0:03:18.000 --> 0:03:20.520 he lived probably like a mile not even a mile 0:03:20.560 --> 0:03:23.160 from us, and didn't see him as much as I 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:25.680 should have. I think he made He was embarrassed by 0:03:25.680 --> 0:03:27.760 his apartment that he first had. He lived above this 0:03:27.800 --> 0:03:31.160 old grocery store, and like the stairs to his back 0:03:31.240 --> 0:03:33.040 door had like holes in it. You had to like 0:03:33.080 --> 0:03:35.320 make sure he didn't fall to the ground and die. 0:03:35.640 --> 0:03:37.960 So I think he was a little embarrassed about that. 0:03:38.160 --> 0:03:40.040 But yeah, it just got worse and worse when my 0:03:40.080 --> 0:03:42.280 mom tried to kind of put up boundaries and tell 0:03:42.360 --> 0:03:44.440 him he can't come in the house anymore, and it 0:03:44.280 --> 0:03:46.880 just made him more mad and little more like angry. 0:03:46.960 --> 0:03:49.480 And I saw a lot of stuff that I shouldn't 0:03:49.520 --> 0:03:52.839 have seen as far as anger goes. And that translated 0:03:52.880 --> 0:03:55.400 to me as a kid, seeing how my dad used 0:03:55.440 --> 0:03:57.840 to you know, shake and he was a scary dude. 0:03:57.880 --> 0:04:00.520 He's super tough. I love him, you know, get along 0:04:00.640 --> 0:04:03.400 really well now, but he was a scary guy. And 0:04:03.440 --> 0:04:06.880 it translated into me in my teenage years, like being 0:04:07.000 --> 0:04:09.760 super angry and you know, wanting to fight the world. 0:04:09.800 --> 0:04:13.480 And even into my twenties when I was playing music 0:04:13.560 --> 0:04:15.600 and going to shows, I was getting in fights all 0:04:15.640 --> 0:04:18.320 the time. And this is an angry. 0:04:18.040 --> 0:04:20.960 Kid, man, No, that's what you'd seen growing up. 0:04:21.240 --> 0:04:24.560 Yeah, it almost felt normal. Maybe it was part of 0:04:24.600 --> 0:04:28.520 me was trying to feel that acceptance being tough. You know, 0:04:28.520 --> 0:04:31.520 I was always never let anybody touch you. If they do, 0:04:32.000 --> 0:04:34.080 you hit them harder, you know, that whole thing. So 0:04:34.960 --> 0:04:37.719 you know, there was a lot of that. And it's 0:04:37.760 --> 0:04:39.960 crazy when you get older and you go through all 0:04:39.960 --> 0:04:43.560 these traumas and relationships and you have your own kids, 0:04:44.200 --> 0:04:46.080 and then you look back and you're like, man, I 0:04:46.160 --> 0:04:48.360 was just the whole time. I just wanted my dad 0:04:48.960 --> 0:04:52.440 like acknowledge me. And we have a good relationship now. 0:04:52.560 --> 0:04:54.320 You know. I don't talk about this a lot, but 0:04:55.640 --> 0:04:58.200 you know, if I'm being honest, it's like I say 0:04:58.200 --> 0:05:00.479 to my wife sometimes it's like I've never you know, 0:05:00.520 --> 0:05:03.120 he's never looked me in the eyes and been like, 0:05:03.200 --> 0:05:05.599 I'm so proud of you, man, I love you. Even 0:05:05.640 --> 0:05:07.760 though I think he is. I know that he is. 0:05:07.839 --> 0:05:10.080 He's just not that kind of guy. But it would 0:05:10.120 --> 0:05:12.680 be really cool to hear him say it because I 0:05:12.680 --> 0:05:14.840 say it to my kids all time. I always tell 0:05:14.880 --> 0:05:17.920 them I'm proud of them and I love them, and God, 0:05:18.040 --> 0:05:20.600 you're such a big part of my life. I think 0:05:20.720 --> 0:05:23.320 now he feels it. But you know, there's a part 0:05:23.360 --> 0:05:24.880 of me that's like I just want you to say 0:05:24.880 --> 0:05:26.400 it in old bastards. 0:05:26.640 --> 0:05:29.960 Yeah, I think it's that acknowledgment. 0:05:30.040 --> 0:05:30.200 Man. 0:05:30.279 --> 0:05:33.440 I mean I feel like all of us as adults, 0:05:34.200 --> 0:05:38.160 we have that kid inside of us still, the innergladiator 0:05:38.200 --> 0:05:40.719 is connected to all the above, and I think that's 0:05:40.720 --> 0:05:43.080 what drives us through the good or the bad, or 0:05:43.120 --> 0:05:45.640 to do good or to do bad, and we're looking 0:05:45.680 --> 0:05:48.760 for outlets. I mean, that's one thing that you know, 0:05:48.839 --> 0:05:50.680 I say to Ashevi all the time about the boys, 0:05:50.839 --> 0:05:54.200 is like, look, they're never ever gonna wonder how much 0:05:54.200 --> 0:05:57.520 we love them. At least we have that going for us. 0:05:57.560 --> 0:05:59.520 Not that we're going to kill it on everything else 0:05:59.560 --> 0:06:02.920 because we won't. We'll mess up our parents, but they'll 0:06:02.960 --> 0:06:06.680 never question how much they're loved. And I think that's 0:06:06.720 --> 0:06:10.240 pretty indicative too of you know, even though you were 0:06:10.240 --> 0:06:13.719 in Philly and you know, we were down in the South, 0:06:13.800 --> 0:06:17.159 like it was pretty kind of the mo just the 0:06:17.200 --> 0:06:19.200 way it went like there, there wasn't a lot of 0:06:19.560 --> 0:06:22.760 physical connection, there wasn't a lot of verbal affirmation. It 0:06:22.880 --> 0:06:26.279 was just kind of like, hey, you're expected to just 0:06:26.440 --> 0:06:29.960 toughen up, be better and be fine. Don't worry about 0:06:30.000 --> 0:06:31.479 that thing, just move on. 0:06:32.480 --> 0:06:37.240 Yeah, very generational I think I think our generation is 0:06:37.320 --> 0:06:40.039 like the first one that's kind of like part of 0:06:40.040 --> 0:06:42.680 both worlds where we're like we grew up with our 0:06:42.720 --> 0:06:45.640 parents are like, don't what are you doing? Just be 0:06:46.040 --> 0:06:48.400 just get out of here and do something, and we're like, 0:06:48.640 --> 0:06:49.479 come back to the street. 0:06:49.520 --> 0:06:50.080 Lights come on. 0:06:50.320 --> 0:06:52.400 Yeah, and now we're finally like, wait a minute, we 0:06:52.440 --> 0:06:54.320 can tell our kids we love them. It's okay, doesn't 0:06:54.360 --> 0:06:57.320 make us weak or anything. So there was a couple 0:06:57.279 --> 0:06:59.960 of incidents when I was a kid because of you know, 0:07:00.080 --> 0:07:02.279 what was going on at my house, that I was 0:07:02.400 --> 0:07:05.680 doubled over in pain in my side. It happened twice. 0:07:05.760 --> 0:07:09.000 My mom thought I had appendicitis, so they rushed me 0:07:09.000 --> 0:07:13.440 to the hospital. Doctors are feeling my side and they're 0:07:13.480 --> 0:07:17.320 basically like, oh, yeah, he's got a pendicitis. And I remember, 0:07:17.440 --> 0:07:21.320 because I'll never eat apple cinnamon cheerios ever again ever 0:07:21.440 --> 0:07:24.280 in my life. They were like, Okay, if he can 0:07:24.360 --> 0:07:27.960 keep this down, he can go home. So I ate 0:07:28.000 --> 0:07:30.920 the apple cinnamon cheerios and I threw up. So I 0:07:30.920 --> 0:07:33.520 had to stay overnight in the hospital. You know, they 0:07:33.560 --> 0:07:35.400 did some tests on me, blah blah blah, and then 0:07:35.480 --> 0:07:39.280 they kind of determined that it was because of stress 0:07:39.440 --> 0:07:42.760 and ulcers. That kind of figured out timing wise, Like 0:07:42.840 --> 0:07:45.240 when some incidents happened in my house when I was 0:07:45.240 --> 0:07:49.920 a kid, it was physically showing itself in me. I 0:07:49.960 --> 0:07:52.280 didn't know. I didn't know it was even affecting me 0:07:52.600 --> 0:07:57.960 that badly, but now I do. But I feel bad 0:07:58.000 --> 0:08:00.440 for that kid now that I'm at peace with it. 0:08:00.520 --> 0:08:03.480 I wish I wish somebody My mom was always there 0:08:03.520 --> 0:08:06.000 for me. You know, she was a victim, and she 0:08:06.200 --> 0:08:08.360 was always worried about what was happening with her, and 0:08:08.400 --> 0:08:10.840 she was kind of consumed with that what he was 0:08:10.920 --> 0:08:13.480 doing and what was happening to her. If I could 0:08:13.520 --> 0:08:16.400 take a time machine to one place, it would be 0:08:16.000 --> 0:08:18.080 to my house when I was a kid, just to 0:08:18.120 --> 0:08:21.800 give myself a hug and be like, Yo, you got this, bro, 0:08:21.880 --> 0:08:24.560 you're gonna be okay. That'd be pretty cool. 0:08:25.360 --> 0:08:27.520 But now you're paying that forward and you're doing it 0:08:27.520 --> 0:08:28.280 for your own kids. 0:08:28.440 --> 0:08:30.560 Yeah, And you know what, I look at my kids 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:32.719 and I'm like, how, you know, I don't understand how 0:08:32.760 --> 0:08:36.640 anyone could treat their kids poorly. It's crazy. It's crazy 0:08:36.679 --> 0:08:38.959 how there's so much child abuse in the world, and 0:08:39.000 --> 0:08:42.480 like human trafficking and all this crazy stuff. And it's 0:08:42.520 --> 0:08:45.000 like I look at my kids and I'm like, man, 0:08:45.160 --> 0:08:48.719 do are the greatest things ever? And I just want 0:08:48.760 --> 0:08:51.720 to just squeeze them every two seconds and just you know, 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:54.720 I like think about them and cry and sometimes just 0:08:54.760 --> 0:08:57.200 because I love them so much, and I just. 0:08:57.400 --> 0:09:00.720 Yeah, I relate. I mean, it's one of those things. 0:09:00.760 --> 0:09:03.400 I'd still friends who are about to be parents for 0:09:03.440 --> 0:09:05.960 the first time. I'm gonna be like, you think you 0:09:06.080 --> 0:09:08.560 think you knew about true luck, Yeah, You're about to 0:09:08.640 --> 0:09:10.559 have a completely different understanding. 0:09:10.679 --> 0:09:14.640 Yeah, and then they start sassing you when they get older. Yeah, 0:09:14.679 --> 0:09:15.600 then they get nothing better. 0:09:15.679 --> 0:09:15.839 Yea. 0:09:16.280 --> 0:09:18.360 Yeah, but it's okay, it's all right. I still love them. 0:09:19.720 --> 0:09:22.880 I played sports every year. I ran track, I ran 0:09:23.000 --> 0:09:27.280 played football. I was captaining a football team, also listened. 0:09:27.320 --> 0:09:30.160 I was like a punk rock jock, which was weird 0:09:30.200 --> 0:09:32.640 because I was going to shows on the weekend, taking 0:09:32.640 --> 0:09:37.319 the subway to Philly, and then playing sports, which kept 0:09:37.360 --> 0:09:40.040 me out of trouble. I didn't drink or do anything 0:09:40.080 --> 0:09:43.000 in high school when a lot of my friends were 0:09:43.600 --> 0:09:47.000 skateboarding doing drugs, so I was trying to stay away 0:09:47.000 --> 0:09:49.800 from that. When I got out of high school. I 0:09:49.840 --> 0:09:51.480 went to art school for a couple of years, and 0:09:52.200 --> 0:09:55.120 because I love to paint, love to draw, but I 0:09:55.200 --> 0:09:57.360 just it just made me hate art because it was 0:09:57.400 --> 0:09:59.600 some guy saying this is the way you got to draw, 0:09:59.640 --> 0:10:01.120 and I'm like, that's not the way I draw. I 0:10:01.120 --> 0:10:03.560 don't want to draw like that. So I was like, 0:10:03.880 --> 0:10:07.680 screw this, you know, and I dropped out for music. 0:10:07.960 --> 0:10:11.640 Started a band that was the thing. I finally realized, 0:10:11.640 --> 0:10:13.160 you know, that's this is what I want to do. 0:10:13.480 --> 0:10:16.559 When I was thirteen, one of my first punk rock shows, 0:10:16.600 --> 0:10:18.920 I went to see this band called Bad Religion, very 0:10:19.080 --> 0:10:23.080 legendary punk rock band from California, and there was a 0:10:23.120 --> 0:10:25.520 band opening up for them that nobody had heard about 0:10:25.600 --> 0:10:30.040 yet named green Day. Wow. Yeah, nineteen ninety three. It 0:10:30.080 --> 0:10:32.960 was like the year before they broke and me and 0:10:33.000 --> 0:10:35.760 my friend had snuck in glow sticks for some reason, 0:10:35.800 --> 0:10:37.480 I have no idea why. My friend was like, hey, 0:10:37.600 --> 0:10:39.800 let's bring these glow sticks to the show. We put 0:10:39.880 --> 0:10:40.280 them in our. 0:10:41.400 --> 0:10:44.400 As a marine, I will say, because they're freaking amazing. 0:10:45.040 --> 0:10:47.840 Oh, it probably life saving for you. But yeah, we 0:10:47.880 --> 0:10:50.400 snuck him in our shoes and Green Day was playing, 0:10:50.600 --> 0:10:52.800 and I broke one open and I threw it on 0:10:52.880 --> 0:10:55.600 stage and I hit Billy Joe the singer with the 0:10:55.640 --> 0:10:58.680 glove stick, and he picked it up and he goes, oh, kryptonite. 0:10:58.720 --> 0:11:01.600 I think I'll keep this, and like that show like 0:11:01.720 --> 0:11:04.400 that happening, and then Bad Religion playing. I was like, 0:11:04.440 --> 0:11:05.719 that's what I want to do. I want to be 0:11:05.800 --> 0:11:08.160 a singer. I want to be in a punk rock band. 0:11:08.720 --> 0:11:11.240 And that changed my life because started going to shows 0:11:11.240 --> 0:11:14.520 every weekend, met all these kids who were, like you said, 0:11:14.640 --> 0:11:18.440 from terrible backgrounds, even like Saw worse than mine. And 0:11:18.480 --> 0:11:22.480 we became this big family and basically raised ourselves. And 0:11:22.559 --> 0:11:26.000 once I graduated high school, we all moved in together. 0:11:26.400 --> 0:11:30.040 We had four houses planted all over Philadelphia. Each house 0:11:30.080 --> 0:11:33.240 had like six people in it. In our early twenties. 0:11:33.280 --> 0:11:37.200 That was our big, huge family. So I was I 0:11:37.280 --> 0:11:40.199 was a bike messenger in Philly while I was playing 0:11:40.280 --> 0:11:42.679 my band and stuff. So then we started getting a 0:11:42.720 --> 0:11:44.679 lot of shows and getting a lot of note already 0:11:44.720 --> 0:11:48.680 on the East Coast and any of those early two 0:11:48.720 --> 0:11:53.480 thousands emo type bands like Taking Back Sunday, We've played 0:11:53.520 --> 0:11:55.400 with all of them. We know most of those guys, 0:11:55.640 --> 0:11:57.680 you know. That was like our scene. We were there 0:11:57.720 --> 0:12:00.760 in the beginning, and that was like I wanted to do. 0:12:00.920 --> 0:12:07.920 You know, what was it about music that really called you? 0:12:08.360 --> 0:12:10.840 I think, you know, it always took a lot for 0:12:10.960 --> 0:12:13.679 me to get close to people, but when once you're 0:12:13.679 --> 0:12:16.520 close to me, I'm like, you're like, dude, you're crazy. 0:12:16.559 --> 0:12:18.199 But I don't let people in it right away. Most 0:12:18.240 --> 0:12:20.959 people that meet me right away they're like, it's so quiet, 0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:23.040 and I'm like, I'm really not quiet. I just don't 0:12:23.040 --> 0:12:26.559 trust you yet, you know. So once I started playing 0:12:26.600 --> 0:12:29.600 music and I got comfortable on stage and started writing 0:12:29.600 --> 0:12:32.079 these songs, and it was the first time I ever 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:35.800 felt like myself, like that's the person who's on stage, 0:12:35.800 --> 0:12:39.719 that's me, like totally out of my shell, comfortable. Like 0:12:40.360 --> 0:12:43.400 we were known for just like going crazy. People always said, 0:12:43.400 --> 0:12:46.040 if you like put our band on TV and turn 0:12:46.080 --> 0:12:47.800 the volume down, you think we were like a metal 0:12:47.800 --> 0:12:52.200 band because we were just like you know. So yeah, 0:12:52.240 --> 0:12:55.480 that was like total freedom for me. And then once 0:12:56.600 --> 0:12:59.360 I started writing songs, and then I'd see these younger 0:12:59.440 --> 0:13:01.880 kids come to our shows and they're singing my lyrics 0:13:01.920 --> 0:13:05.400 back to me, like wow, with like more like vigor 0:13:05.440 --> 0:13:07.600 than I like I'm doing it with and I'm like, 0:13:08.000 --> 0:13:11.000 it's the best feeling in the world. Your experience that 0:13:11.040 --> 0:13:13.920 you wrote about is helping these kids that are just 0:13:14.080 --> 0:13:18.240 like you. I've gotten emails from kids saying, like, your 0:13:18.320 --> 0:13:20.600 lyrics saved my life. You know, I was going through 0:13:20.600 --> 0:13:23.640 a hard time. Thank you for everything, And it's the 0:13:23.760 --> 0:13:25.120 greatest feeling in the whole world. 0:13:25.920 --> 0:13:31.320 Music is something you can truly connect to that can 0:13:31.400 --> 0:13:34.679 really drive your emotions one way or another. It can 0:13:34.720 --> 0:13:37.000 take you back to a moment, it can encourage you, 0:13:37.040 --> 0:13:39.480 it can lift you up, it can bring you down, 0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:42.080 it can meet you right where you are. Music is 0:13:42.120 --> 0:13:44.800 such a powerful and emotional thing. 0:13:45.040 --> 0:13:45.280 Yeah. 0:13:45.360 --> 0:13:47.959 I just always likes to tell me that my playlists 0:13:48.040 --> 0:13:52.520 it's like the most schizophrenic playlist on the planet because 0:13:52.600 --> 0:13:56.240 I have everything that you could think of and it 0:13:56.360 --> 0:13:59.959 just depends on my mood. Yeah, it completely depends on 0:14:00.200 --> 0:14:03.760 my mood. But you know, music is you know, it 0:14:03.800 --> 0:14:06.160 can be a safe place or it can be a 0:14:06.200 --> 0:14:09.920 place that can feed the negative too, and everything in between. 0:14:10.480 --> 0:14:14.160 And what's cool is regardless of this genre that somebody's into, 0:14:14.880 --> 0:14:17.960 they can absolutely relate to what we're talking about. Oh yeah, 0:14:18.080 --> 0:14:19.840 that's what's so cool about it. And the fact that 0:14:19.880 --> 0:14:21.480 you got to do it, and you got to hear 0:14:21.520 --> 0:14:24.680 these kids singing your lyrics back to you and sending 0:14:24.720 --> 0:14:28.200 you emails. Did that spiritual stuff right there, That's something 0:14:28.240 --> 0:14:31.480 that a very small percentage of the world ever gets 0:14:31.480 --> 0:14:32.200 to experience. 0:14:32.520 --> 0:14:34.560 Oh yeah, I mean I look back and it's what 0:14:34.640 --> 0:14:36.480 I wanted to do for my life. It didn't work out. 0:14:36.560 --> 0:14:41.560 Because of what happened to me and what I accomplished. 0:14:42.240 --> 0:14:44.320 Not many people can say that they did. You know, 0:14:44.480 --> 0:14:46.360 there's a lot of people that can get on stage 0:14:46.360 --> 0:14:48.320 with a band and play some cover songs and stuff 0:14:48.360 --> 0:14:52.360 like that, which is fine, But like, just to affect 0:14:52.680 --> 0:14:56.400 one person in a positive way, for me, it's totally 0:14:56.440 --> 0:14:56.960 worth it. 0:14:57.040 --> 0:15:01.360 Absolutely if all the work we do and all the 0:15:01.400 --> 0:15:05.720 grinding and all the travel and speaking and all of it, 0:15:06.360 --> 0:15:09.160 if it makes one person decide, hey, you know what 0:15:09.320 --> 0:15:11.440 this life is worth living, that it was all worth it. 0:15:12.280 --> 0:15:13.320 I totally agree. 0:15:13.720 --> 0:15:16.800 And so as Jake you know, alluded to, it doesn't 0:15:16.800 --> 0:15:19.520 matter the genre. So I listened to old Country on vinyl, 0:15:20.000 --> 0:15:23.040 so I know nothing about the Philly punk rock scene 0:15:23.040 --> 0:15:26.960 in the nineties. Paint that picture because I really school us. 0:15:26.840 --> 0:15:30.240 Stuff on that. It was such a cool, unique place 0:15:31.000 --> 0:15:37.440 where you know, you have all these kids from different backgrounds. 0:15:37.760 --> 0:15:40.560 You know, you got black kids, White kids, Mexican kids, 0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:46.680 Asian kids, all becoming this big family around this music. 0:15:46.920 --> 0:15:48.560 It was just a really good feeling. I mean. And 0:15:48.600 --> 0:15:51.280 in Philadelphia and the late nineties early two thousands, there 0:15:51.320 --> 0:15:54.440 was a lot of Nazis coming into from Atlantic City. 0:15:54.480 --> 0:15:57.920 There was this gang called the acy Skins, so their 0:15:58.120 --> 0:16:00.280 Nazis would come to the punk rock shows. You would 0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:02.600 get in fights with them all the time. It's like 0:16:02.640 --> 0:16:04.440 a big thing in the punk rock scene where it's 0:16:04.520 --> 0:16:06.920 like you have these certain types of punk raft bands 0:16:06.960 --> 0:16:10.480 that attract that kind of person like Nazis, and every 0:16:10.480 --> 0:16:12.640 once in a while one of those bands will play 0:16:13.320 --> 0:16:16.680 with another band that attracts people like me who are 0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:20.800 like unified with everybody, and you know there's Nazis. We 0:16:20.960 --> 0:16:24.080 could possibly go wrong. Yeah, So there were a lot 0:16:24.120 --> 0:16:27.040 of There were a lot of fights, a lot of drama. 0:16:27.240 --> 0:16:30.120 We started making these little they would call them cruise 0:16:30.520 --> 0:16:32.720 some people would call them gangs, but it's not. It's 0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:37.040 like a music crew, but in a sense it's similar 0:16:37.760 --> 0:16:39.760 where it's like we had to like band together to 0:16:39.800 --> 0:16:42.720 protect ourselves. There was fights all the time some of 0:16:42.720 --> 0:16:46.400 my friends got you know, hurt really bad. The Nazi 0:16:46.640 --> 0:16:49.520 used to threaten us on MySpace of all places. I'm like, well, 0:16:49.680 --> 0:16:52.760 of course, of course a Nazi with threaten our lives 0:16:52.760 --> 0:16:54.800 on my Space. It was just the corniest thing ever. 0:16:55.160 --> 0:16:59.520 You got to love those keyboard Warriors exactly so tough, 0:16:59.600 --> 0:16:59.760 you know. 0:16:59.800 --> 0:17:04.680 We started these little crews and that kind of put 0:17:04.760 --> 0:17:07.439 us in a group together and kind of kept us safe. 0:17:07.560 --> 0:17:10.480 Like if one of us got in trouble, there'd be 0:17:10.720 --> 0:17:13.960 twenty thirty people there within seconds to help them. So 0:17:15.160 --> 0:17:17.600 and for the most part, everybody was Most of the 0:17:17.680 --> 0:17:20.240 kids were straight edged, didn't drink, do drugs or anything 0:17:20.320 --> 0:17:23.119 like that. It was cool. It was like a big family. 0:17:23.280 --> 0:17:25.600 Wasn't the smartest thing to fight all the time, but 0:17:26.640 --> 0:17:28.720 most of the time you fight at shows. We know, 0:17:28.920 --> 0:17:31.560 like the bouncers at all the shows in Philly were like, 0:17:31.600 --> 0:17:34.200 are the guys that brought us up in the scene. 0:17:34.920 --> 0:17:36.960 Even if we started the fight, they would kick the 0:17:37.000 --> 0:17:43.520 other person out anyways, and we'd just be like, yeah. 0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:47.639 Yeah, I loved fighting. And the reason being the reason 0:17:47.680 --> 0:17:50.320 I loved it was because it masked my emotional pain. 0:17:50.440 --> 0:17:53.120 I would rather feel the physical pain and it got 0:17:53.160 --> 0:17:56.000 to where I got addicted to it. The physical pain. 0:17:56.920 --> 0:17:59.560 It drove me, and it was like the more I got, 0:17:59.600 --> 0:18:03.280 the more I wanted it. I bet you you're kind 0:18:03.320 --> 0:18:04.480 of similar in. 0:18:04.359 --> 0:18:07.240 That there's very few feelings in the world that are 0:18:07.240 --> 0:18:14.200 better than knocking somebody out. Seriously, it's like it's brotherly 0:18:14.280 --> 0:18:15.560 love right there there. 0:18:15.560 --> 0:18:15.840 It is. 0:18:16.080 --> 0:18:20.040 Yeah, I mean, it's just it's a it's just a thing. Yeah. 0:18:20.080 --> 0:18:22.080 So life took a sudden shift for you when you 0:18:22.160 --> 0:18:24.240 developed tonitis in your early twenties. 0:18:24.560 --> 0:18:29.560 Yep. My band was we always turned up to eleven. 0:18:30.280 --> 0:18:32.800 We used to practice in this little tiny space and 0:18:32.840 --> 0:18:35.160 you got amps, you got drums, I'm in there singing. 0:18:36.119 --> 0:18:39.200 Definitely not the smartest thing in the world. And when 0:18:39.240 --> 0:18:43.680 you're younger, you think you're indestructible and you think nothing 0:18:43.680 --> 0:18:47.359 can happen to you. My friend of mine, who's a 0:18:47.400 --> 0:18:50.360 bass player, guitar player, I remember his dad was in 0:18:50.400 --> 0:18:52.520 one of our practices and he was like, you guys 0:18:52.560 --> 0:18:55.200 wear you guys gotta wear your plugs, and I'm like, whatever, 0:18:55.280 --> 0:18:58.640 wrap so what all go deaf? One day had no idea, 0:18:59.480 --> 0:19:01.359 you know. It was younger and going to shows and 0:19:01.440 --> 0:19:04.119 my ears would ring after a show and then they 0:19:04.119 --> 0:19:06.240 would then it would stop, and I'm like, oh, that's 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:11.080 totally normal. And then one day after a show was 0:19:11.200 --> 0:19:13.200 ringing again. And then the next day I'm like, wait 0:19:13.200 --> 0:19:15.520 a minute, still there, and I like plug. I plugged 0:19:15.520 --> 0:19:18.480 my fingers in my ears, and I'm like, oh shit, 0:19:18.560 --> 0:19:22.720 it's still there. That's weird. Okay, that's kind of scary. 0:19:22.840 --> 0:19:25.880 A couple of months later, one day just turned up 0:19:26.160 --> 0:19:33.800 super loud, just completely. It was like and I'm like, 0:19:33.880 --> 0:19:38.920 what the hell, Like, what's happening? And it didn't stop. 0:19:39.200 --> 0:19:41.919 It didn't stop for I didn't sleep for a month, 0:19:42.320 --> 0:19:45.120 and it was so stressful because of course I start 0:19:45.160 --> 0:19:48.680 looking it up, like what is this? I had no 0:19:48.800 --> 0:19:51.280 I had no clue I got. I was totally ignorant 0:19:51.320 --> 0:19:54.439 and just I had no idea what it was called 0:19:54.840 --> 0:20:00.119 tonight is tendus people say different. Started learning about it, 0:20:00.320 --> 0:20:04.679 went to the doctor. The doctor was like, you know, 0:20:04.760 --> 0:20:06.480