WEBVTT - Jemma Sbeg 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:03.880 Welcome to Ruthie's Table four, a production of iHeartRadio and 0:00:03.920 --> 0:00:05.440 Adamized Studios. 0:00:06.280 --> 0:00:09.159 I'm Sean, come man, I'm a the executive chef in 0:00:09.200 --> 0:00:12.320 a recovery. It's Friday lunch, so I'm here with all 0:00:12.360 --> 0:00:13.240 the chefs clicking away. 0:00:13.440 --> 0:00:13.800 Yeah. 0:00:13.920 --> 0:00:16.279 Nice, I know it's busy and girl, and I'm Jama 0:00:17.480 --> 0:00:20.640 Nice to me and I'm hot The Psychology of Your 0:00:20.680 --> 0:00:22.320 Twenties at the podcast. 0:00:25.040 --> 0:00:27.639 Jemmy speG and I met for the first time just 0:00:27.680 --> 0:00:30.159 a few days ago in the River Cafe. She was 0:00:30.240 --> 0:00:34.080 introduced to me as the most exciting podcaster today. 0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:37.960 Not great for my ego. Distance keeps us apart. 0:00:38.320 --> 0:00:41.159 She lives in Sydney, I live in London, and we're 0:00:41.159 --> 0:00:44.040 in different stages of our lives for sure, but that 0:00:44.120 --> 0:00:47.159 doesn't seem to matter. We both love talking to people, 0:00:47.320 --> 0:00:50.320 we both love eating delicious food, and we both love 0:00:50.400 --> 0:00:53.280 pondering situations and finding solutions. 0:00:53.800 --> 0:00:54.560 Listen to the. 0:00:54.440 --> 0:00:57.880 Titles of some of her episodes on Psychology of Your 0:00:57.920 --> 0:01:01.720 Twenties and you'll see why I Am hooked, Embrace your 0:01:01.760 --> 0:01:05.839 Authentic Self, Daddy issues, why we date the wrong people, 0:01:06.319 --> 0:01:11.560 career anxiety, disillusionment, and feeling stuck Gemma has been in 0:01:11.560 --> 0:01:14.000 the River Cafe. Cooking asparak is fun due to with 0:01:14.080 --> 0:01:17.320 the chefs. We're going to have lunch and talk some 0:01:17.360 --> 0:01:21.240 more on Monday. She's going back to Australia, but something 0:01:21.319 --> 0:01:23.200 tells me I'm not letting her go. 0:01:25.200 --> 0:01:25.920 That's for sure. 0:01:26.240 --> 0:01:26.960 That's for sure. 0:01:27.360 --> 0:01:30.959 So tell me about cooking fun, Duta, how is that 0:01:31.120 --> 0:01:32.360 in the River Cafe kitchen? 0:01:32.560 --> 0:01:35.960 It was amazing. I actually used to work in a restaurant. 0:01:36.000 --> 0:01:38.800 I used to work at a steak restaurant yeap in Australia, 0:01:39.400 --> 0:01:42.759 in Canberra, so Canberra, capital of Australia. It was how 0:01:42.760 --> 0:01:45.479 I paid my bills when I was at Uni and broke, 0:01:46.160 --> 0:01:48.960 and so it was really fun to come back and 0:01:49.440 --> 0:01:52.280 to be back in the same kind of situation and 0:01:52.720 --> 0:01:55.880 cooking something. And actually we didn't cook much. 0:01:56.000 --> 0:01:59.040 Fresh food so stastant. 0:01:58.360 --> 0:02:02.520 At the steak restaurant now it was fat potatoes. So asparagus, 0:02:02.560 --> 0:02:06.880 fresh asparagus was a nice treat, that's for sure. I'm doing. 0:02:07.360 --> 0:02:08.240 I'm so excited. 0:02:08.560 --> 0:02:08.840 Cool. 0:02:09.400 --> 0:02:12.520 So we're going to cook asparagus, which is really slap 0:02:12.520 --> 0:02:15.399 back in season now, like it's English asparagus and it's 0:02:15.440 --> 0:02:19.160 it's exactly peak season. And then we've made this sauce 0:02:19.360 --> 0:02:22.440 out of cramb fresh eggyolks and palms. 0:02:22.880 --> 0:02:24.360 It's really yummy. 0:02:24.520 --> 0:02:26.840 But the sauces is just you put the three ingreetments 0:02:26.880 --> 0:02:29.280 together and cook them together. And we've done that, and 0:02:29.320 --> 0:02:30.680 I'll just show you how we put it together. 0:02:30.880 --> 0:02:31.840 Oh I'm so excited. 0:02:32.240 --> 0:02:36.280 Yeah, okay, so that living in not very not very 0:02:36.280 --> 0:02:38.240 long at all, for or four minutes, but because. 0:02:38.000 --> 0:02:39.000 It's so fresh. 0:02:39.200 --> 0:02:42.160 Yeah, it doesn't take that long as to cook super fresh, 0:02:42.840 --> 0:02:44.040 actually probably slightly. 0:02:46.120 --> 0:02:50.440 When it turns that beautiful shade of grain, it's just gorgeous. 0:02:50.840 --> 0:02:52.640 And what we might do is we have this sauce 0:02:52.840 --> 0:02:55.840 which is really yummy, which is. 0:02:55.840 --> 0:02:59.840 Put on a plate like this, it looks like coustant almost. 0:03:00.080 --> 0:03:01.639 I know it's savory exactly. 0:03:02.440 --> 0:03:05.760 You can see the classes of it the guests, you know, 0:03:07.240 --> 0:03:10.120 the size based on exactly people or how hungry you are, 0:03:10.880 --> 0:03:11.640 how hungry. 0:03:11.440 --> 0:03:11.840 They are. 0:03:14.200 --> 0:03:18.920 Here we go look at that simple but amazing cheese. 0:03:19.600 --> 0:03:23.359 Oh they like more or less? Yeah, me too. We've 0:03:23.360 --> 0:03:25.079 got to have more farmers exactly. 0:03:25.440 --> 0:03:26.320 You don't have too much. 0:03:26.440 --> 0:03:31.079 This just makes everything better, great goodness. 0:03:31.080 --> 0:03:36.120 Sometimes this is probably one of our most popular dishes 0:03:36.120 --> 0:03:37.120 that we have on the lifetime. 0:03:37.320 --> 0:03:40.800 Yeah, also with the sun, with the sun and a 0:03:40.840 --> 0:03:44.040 glass of wine, and a glass of wine. 0:03:46.320 --> 0:03:48.080 So would you like to read the recipe? 0:03:48.200 --> 0:03:48.520 Yes? 0:03:48.600 --> 0:03:49.080 Please? 0:03:49.360 --> 0:03:52.360 This recipe says it serves six. I grew up in 0:03:52.360 --> 0:03:55.200 a big family, so it's going to serve ten at least, 0:03:55.400 --> 0:03:57.960 so we're going to have some of these portions. It 0:03:58.040 --> 0:04:00.680 recommends a quilo and a half of asparagus. Let's change 0:04:00.680 --> 0:04:03.480 that to three just for fun. Leftovers are always nice. 0:04:03.960 --> 0:04:07.880 Two hundredgrams of parmesan you know double that it's four hundred, 0:04:07.880 --> 0:04:11.400 but everyone loves parmesan cheese. You know you never want 0:04:11.400 --> 0:04:14.640 to stop. So let's say five hundred freshly grated garlic 0:04:14.680 --> 0:04:17.720 as well, one clove of garlic peeled and crushed, of course, 0:04:18.120 --> 0:04:20.919 and then four hundred militers of I don't actually know 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:23.000 how to pronounce this creme fine. 0:04:22.880 --> 0:04:24.160 Frame fresh crim. 0:04:24.000 --> 0:04:27.679 Fresh kind of sour cream that you get in France. 0:04:28.440 --> 0:04:29.120 Love nice. 0:04:29.279 --> 0:04:31.240 I had some before, but when I had this, so 0:04:31.720 --> 0:04:35.080 eight hundred meals for that, and then four large organic 0:04:35.120 --> 0:04:38.600 and of course free range egg yolks. We're not here 0:04:38.640 --> 0:04:42.240 for cage, sorry, guys. So your first app will be 0:04:42.279 --> 0:04:45.120 to use a medium sauce pan maybe large in this 0:04:45.279 --> 0:04:49.800 instance that will fit inside another larger sauce pan with 0:04:49.960 --> 0:04:53.960 enough room to fill with water. We're going to rub 0:04:54.160 --> 0:04:57.960 that crushed garlic around the surface of the smaller pan, 0:04:58.279 --> 0:05:01.440 get all those flavors in there, and add the cream 0:05:01.560 --> 0:05:05.760 and a nice amount of parmesan, maybe more than we suggested, 0:05:06.320 --> 0:05:09.560 and of course your egg yolks. Place the pan on 0:05:09.640 --> 0:05:12.560 top of the hot water and stirring gently until the 0:05:12.640 --> 0:05:16.240 sauce thickens. That should be about fifteen minutes, and of 0:05:16.279 --> 0:05:19.800 course salt and pepper. Let's season it. Well, snap off 0:05:19.839 --> 0:05:23.480 the ends of the asparagus and cook that in the 0:05:23.480 --> 0:05:27.599 boiling water for three to four minutes. Interestingly, when I 0:05:27.600 --> 0:05:30.279 had it was a bit aldente, which was really really nice, 0:05:30.279 --> 0:05:33.480 So maybe sitting a little bit below that three minutes, 0:05:33.520 --> 0:05:37.560 whatever takes your fancy, and then drain it, place in 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:41.760 a warm bowl and pour the fondue over the asparagus. 0:05:41.880 --> 0:05:43.960 Maybe add a little bit of olive oil if you're 0:05:44.000 --> 0:05:47.679 feeling extra excited by that. Of course, the River Cafe 0:05:47.720 --> 0:05:50.680 olive oil is amazing, so that would be my preference, 0:05:51.320 --> 0:05:56.000 and serve with you guessed it even more grated parmesan there. 0:05:56.040 --> 0:06:01.760 It is beautiful great. 0:06:04.600 --> 0:06:06.480 Do you cook for yourself? Absolutely? 0:06:06.680 --> 0:06:09.560 Do you? Yeah? I cook so much. I think I 0:06:09.640 --> 0:06:12.160 travel so much right that when I'm home and when 0:06:12.160 --> 0:06:15.400 I'm back in Sydney, I really don't want to go 0:06:15.440 --> 0:06:17.479 out and eat out all the time or order in. 0:06:17.640 --> 0:06:21.360 I want to be alone or with my I live 0:06:21.400 --> 0:06:25.200 with housemates actually still I live with three boys, three 0:06:25.279 --> 0:06:28.760 guys in their twenties. It's very a new girl situation 0:06:28.800 --> 0:06:31.600 if you've seen that TV show. And one of my 0:06:31.600 --> 0:06:34.240 favorite things to do when I'm back is to cook 0:06:34.279 --> 0:06:37.919 something for them. So every Sunday night we do. I 0:06:38.000 --> 0:06:42.040 call it family dinner. We're not related, but by hearts 0:06:42.040 --> 0:06:42.320 we are. 0:06:42.800 --> 0:06:46.720 Something that I've been lockdown, sort of eased up. We 0:06:46.720 --> 0:06:49.600 were allowed to go out, but everybody was pretty much 0:06:49.600 --> 0:06:51.960 in their own homes. A friend of mine was making 0:06:51.960 --> 0:06:55.240 a movie actually say with Austin, but we've about lost 0:06:55.360 --> 0:06:58.880 a Minuteicot, and we started having Sunday night supper. So 0:06:58.920 --> 0:07:01.720 I would cook, they would kind of do some shopping, 0:07:01.839 --> 0:07:04.560 or we'd cook and just get together. And then we 0:07:04.640 --> 0:07:07.120 played a game of cards. And they were about eight 0:07:07.160 --> 0:07:10.000 of us, and we met every Sunday night for almost 0:07:10.000 --> 0:07:12.680 thirty well for thirty nine weeks now it just became 0:07:12.800 --> 0:07:16.120 very important as Sunday night dinner kind of end of 0:07:16.120 --> 0:07:18.600 the week, the beginning of the new week. Sundays are 0:07:18.680 --> 0:07:20.840 kind of grim. Is that what you What do you 0:07:20.920 --> 0:07:22.240 like about Sunday night suffers? 0:07:22.440 --> 0:07:24.840 That is spot on, and I think it emulates a 0:07:24.880 --> 0:07:28.720 family system that we when we get older, we don't have. 0:07:29.280 --> 0:07:31.680 But the way that I really saw it was you 0:07:31.760 --> 0:07:34.080 start your week off doing something for someone else. So 0:07:34.640 --> 0:07:37.000 it was a really beautiful way for me to express 0:07:37.040 --> 0:07:39.560 my love for these people and show them generosity by 0:07:39.560 --> 0:07:43.000 going and getting a leg of lamb or making Italian 0:07:43.040 --> 0:07:48.040 meatballs or lasagna, and really starting the week off having 0:07:48.120 --> 0:07:51.240 done something for someone else. And we also play cards, 0:07:51.320 --> 0:07:54.040 did you yeah you're gay? Okay? So ours is actually 0:07:54.120 --> 0:07:57.040 monopoly deal? So's it's a card version of monopoly. 0:07:57.440 --> 0:08:00.360 So maybe not as do you buy sell hope else? 0:08:00.760 --> 0:08:04.880 Oh yeah, absolutely, it's the only it's the only taste 0:08:05.120 --> 0:08:07.800 of property ownership I think I'm gonna get for a while. 0:08:07.840 --> 0:08:09.160 So it keeps me on. 0:08:11.440 --> 0:08:13.240 Maybe not? Or do you live with? What are the 0:08:13.280 --> 0:08:13.800 guys like? 0:08:14.040 --> 0:08:17.040 They're amazing? I really love them. One of them is 0:08:17.040 --> 0:08:19.440 an actor. One of them is in finance. One of 0:08:19.480 --> 0:08:22.360 them is in marketing. It's very different from what I do. 0:08:22.640 --> 0:08:25.840 Maybe Jack is the actor. He's actually moving to Paris soon. 0:08:26.000 --> 0:08:28.880 So the Sunday Dinners are sadly coming to an end 0:08:29.440 --> 0:08:34.200 in October. But it's also really it's nice, I think 0:08:34.200 --> 0:08:36.679 in some ways because it makes me feel quite maternal 0:08:36.760 --> 0:08:39.319 as well, and I think that's an instinct that I've 0:08:39.360 --> 0:08:41.960 always had, and I think that food and family are 0:08:42.080 --> 0:08:45.880 very much synonymous. So maybe it's because I always saw 0:08:45.920 --> 0:08:48.839 my mum doing this for me and for my dad 0:08:48.880 --> 0:08:51.720 and for my cousins and my aunts and my uncles, 0:08:52.280 --> 0:08:55.440 that I've really taken the reins from it. I've taken 0:08:55.480 --> 0:08:58.160 that from her, and it's it's really interesting when we 0:08:58.200 --> 0:09:00.840 think about psychology. Actually, everyone like I don't want to 0:09:00.840 --> 0:09:04.040 turn into my parents, I don't want to be like them, 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:07.319 and I'm like, I absolutely want to be like her. 0:09:07.559 --> 0:09:10.520 She has generosity running through her blood. She's a wonderful woman. 0:09:10.720 --> 0:09:12.760 I found that very touching when you said you want 0:09:12.760 --> 0:09:17.559 to be like your mother. That's every parent's dream and 0:09:17.559 --> 0:09:19.839 it certainly was mine as well. I think you can 0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:22.960 tell people who come from happy families where they loved 0:09:23.000 --> 0:09:24.960 and where they want to love, So tell me what 0:09:25.080 --> 0:09:27.360 it was like growing up in your house. 0:09:29.240 --> 0:09:33.640 It's interesting. My dad's from Queensland, so it's kind of rual. 0:09:33.679 --> 0:09:36.080 It's a bit rough in tumble sometimes. My mom's actually 0:09:36.120 --> 0:09:39.000 from Wisconsin, so I was American. She's American. 0:09:39.160 --> 0:09:41.000 Yeah. Had she end up in Australia. 0:09:41.600 --> 0:09:43.040 It's kind of actually a hard story. 0:09:43.160 --> 0:09:43.360 You know. 0:09:43.440 --> 0:09:46.440 Her parents got divorced and her dad kind of walked 0:09:46.480 --> 0:09:48.559 out of the picture. She hasn't spoken to him for 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:50.400 a while, you know, she won't mind me saying that. 0:09:50.480 --> 0:09:55.600 And she moved with with my grandma and they moved 0:09:55.600 --> 0:09:58.280 to Australia, and it was really hard. I think when 0:09:58.280 --> 0:10:01.200 they first got here she was old enough to really 0:10:01.880 --> 0:10:04.440 have friends and to want to assimilate. She was around fourteen, 0:10:05.679 --> 0:10:07.720 and I think that's actually a really hard age to move. 0:10:07.760 --> 0:10:11.240 But it has made her a wonderful mother because she 0:10:11.320 --> 0:10:15.040 really understands the importance of belonging. And my dad grew 0:10:15.120 --> 0:10:17.560 up in a big family, so he understood that as well. 0:10:17.640 --> 0:10:19.240 And they met in Australia. 0:10:19.320 --> 0:10:21.959 They met in Australia. They met at a cricket game 0:10:23.120 --> 0:10:26.440 and my mom went up to him and was like, 0:10:26.600 --> 0:10:30.480 I think you're really cute and the rest is history. 0:10:30.520 --> 0:10:32.880 And they did long distance for a while. They have 0:10:33.000 --> 0:10:36.520 such a beautiful story. Then it's really nice being able 0:10:36.559 --> 0:10:38.520 to look at your parents and realize that they still 0:10:38.559 --> 0:10:41.320 really like each other and that they really get along. 0:10:41.840 --> 0:10:44.280 And every night I'll go home and they always share 0:10:44.280 --> 0:10:47.280 a glass of wine together. They cook for each other. Still, 0:10:47.320 --> 0:10:49.000 Like I said, food and love and family. 0:10:49.240 --> 0:10:50.600 Yeah, are you an only child? 0:10:50.720 --> 0:10:52.120 I'm not. I have two sisters. 0:10:52.240 --> 0:10:54.640 So well would meals be? Like, tell me about food 0:10:54.679 --> 0:10:55.200 in your house? 0:10:55.440 --> 0:10:59.280 Go back to So my mom was Actually she was 0:10:59.720 --> 0:11:01.160 a break I don't know. She worked full time, she 0:11:01.200 --> 0:11:04.520 traveled a lot. We didn't actually see her very much 0:11:04.559 --> 0:11:07.120 for a little while because she was, you know, trying 0:11:07.120 --> 0:11:09.320 to provide for the family. My dad was a stay 0:11:09.360 --> 0:11:12.360 at home dad. So what did she did. She's an 0:11:12.400 --> 0:11:16.480 economist and so she it's so different from what I do, right, 0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:19.720 And she talks about money all day. I talk about feelings. 0:11:20.840 --> 0:11:24.400 And she would be traveling, but she would always try 0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:26.360 and come back for at least two or three nights, 0:11:26.360 --> 0:11:30.199 and my dad would cook for us. And actually the 0:11:30.320 --> 0:11:33.640 meal that I most associate with my childhood is by 0:11:33.679 --> 0:11:37.360 Jamie Oliver. He has this tuna pasta dish. It was 0:11:37.400 --> 0:11:41.120 in his book Fifteen Minute Meals. It's tuna and it's 0:11:41.160 --> 0:11:44.560 got this amazing basil flavor and cinnamon and it's like 0:11:44.840 --> 0:11:47.280 you would never think that tuna and cinnamon would go well, 0:11:47.360 --> 0:11:50.920 but it's like delicious and it's my comfort meal now 0:11:50.960 --> 0:11:52.840 because we ate it so much. You know, my dad 0:11:52.880 --> 0:11:56.040 was really trying to look after three three young girls 0:11:56.240 --> 0:11:59.560 and my sisters. One of my sisters is an athlete, 0:12:00.080 --> 0:12:02.360 so there was also a lot of driving to practices 0:12:02.440 --> 0:12:07.400 and it's it's an Australian Sports Football so AFL, Australian 0:12:07.400 --> 0:12:10.520 Football League, so it's kind of like rugby. She's really tall, 0:12:10.840 --> 0:12:15.079 she's like she's like over six foot. She's tall, she's beautiful, 0:12:15.240 --> 0:12:19.400 she's so kind and yeah, so that's the mealie most 0:12:19.440 --> 0:12:21.640 associated that, or a tuna pasta bakes a lot of tune. 0:12:21.679 --> 0:12:24.119 It's simple with tuna, and then. 0:12:24.280 --> 0:12:28.160 For dessert, we would have berry cobbler, which is a classic, 0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:30.840 right everyone, When you think of cobbler, you think of 0:12:31.160 --> 0:12:33.280 warmth and cozy in childhood and what. 0:12:33.400 --> 0:12:35.040 Is verry cop can you describe it? 0:12:35.800 --> 0:12:38.200 So berry cobbler, it's kind of like I think it 0:12:38.240 --> 0:12:39.640 was like kind of a poor man's dish back in 0:12:39.679 --> 0:12:42.040 the day, because it's super simple to make. It's these 0:12:42.080 --> 0:12:45.360 berries that you cook in this like amazing sugary syrup 0:12:45.400 --> 0:12:49.160 and with butter, and then on top you put like 0:12:49.240 --> 0:12:53.199 egg and more butter and sugar and flour together and 0:12:53.240 --> 0:12:55.320 you mix it all up and then crumble it on 0:12:56.240 --> 0:12:56.760 so crumble. 0:12:56.840 --> 0:12:58.440 So you grew up with your dad and he would 0:12:58.480 --> 0:13:01.360 cook edward every night, a different kind of dinner. 0:13:01.360 --> 0:13:02.600 Did he did. 0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:06.000 He really spend time and making sure that everything was good. 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:10.040 He did. He's from an Italian family, so I think 0:13:10.440 --> 0:13:12.720 it's like this generational thing. His mom used to put 0:13:12.760 --> 0:13:14.400 so much care into her meals, and he would do 0:13:14.440 --> 0:13:14.920 that for us. 0:13:15.040 --> 0:13:17.720 And when your mom cooked, what would she cook? 0:13:18.240 --> 0:13:20.640 She loves fresh food. We used to do this thing 0:13:20.679 --> 0:13:24.959 called snack plate. And it's what that would mean was 0:13:25.000 --> 0:13:26.480 we would go to the markets with her when she 0:13:26.520 --> 0:13:29.280 was back on Saturday or Sunday, the Queen Victoria Markets. 0:13:29.320 --> 0:13:32.600 If you're ever in Melbourne, it's amazing. You know, if 0:13:32.640 --> 0:13:34.320 you live there, you know all the tenders and you 0:13:34.360 --> 0:13:37.200 know everyone, and she would take us and we would 0:13:37.200 --> 0:13:39.360 all get to choose what snacks we would want on 0:13:39.360 --> 0:13:41.640 the snack plate. It's kind of like a checruderie board 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:46.040 chacuderi boards before we knew what that was, and with 0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:49.720 very cheap deli meats, not prostudo. But we would and 0:13:49.760 --> 0:13:52.559 we would have carrots and she would always get these 0:13:52.679 --> 0:13:56.680 amazing cherry tomatoes and cucumber that she would slice and 0:13:56.760 --> 0:14:00.600 dips and it was very like Mediterranean and we would 0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:02.160 put it down on the table. And then there was 0:14:02.200 --> 0:14:04.440 always a portion for sweet foods and the one the 0:14:04.440 --> 0:14:07.920 sweet food that we'd always get was chocolate covered pretzels 0:14:08.600 --> 0:14:11.520 and they were like, they were amazing. She was She 0:14:11.640 --> 0:14:14.240 worked so hard, you know she, but she still wanted 0:14:14.280 --> 0:14:17.080 to when she had the time to provide and to 0:14:17.160 --> 0:14:21.480 do amazing things. And every Christmas she would She's the 0:14:22.040 --> 0:14:24.920 pillar of our family Christmases. Nothing would no one would 0:14:24.920 --> 0:14:27.920 eat without that woman like she's she's such a provider. 0:14:28.280 --> 0:14:29.720 So this was your growing up. 0:14:29.840 --> 0:14:32.400 You're growing up with this food, with your father cooking, 0:14:32.440 --> 0:14:35.800 your mother coming back from a business trip and cooking. 0:14:36.280 --> 0:14:38.560 What were your teenagers like? Were you quite a happy 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:40.400 teenager or was it conflicted? 0:14:41.040 --> 0:14:45.000 I actually wasn't. I don't think I was very I 0:14:45.000 --> 0:14:47.560 think I was I was a bit of a strange child. 0:14:47.640 --> 0:14:51.000 I was a bit of a strange teenager. I was 0:14:51.120 --> 0:14:54.800 very I was very focused on academic success, and I 0:14:54.840 --> 0:14:58.120 went to a public school in inner city Melbourne, where 0:14:58.520 --> 0:15:00.400 it was the thing to be very different and to be, 0:15:01.120 --> 0:15:03.120 you know, drinking early and to be doing like rock 0:15:03.160 --> 0:15:05.280 and roll music and to be it was very like 0:15:05.360 --> 0:15:08.480 punk almost, And I was kind of I was a 0:15:08.560 --> 0:15:11.840 very anxious teenager, and I just wanted to do well 0:15:11.880 --> 0:15:15.240 in school and I wanted to go on to university. 0:15:15.280 --> 0:15:17.480 I wanted to spend time in nature and by myself, 0:15:17.560 --> 0:15:20.840 and I think that I was kind of lonely. I 0:15:20.880 --> 0:15:24.880 had had friends, but I think I've always wanted to 0:15:25.560 --> 0:15:28.440 examine things deeper in a way that can sometimes make 0:15:28.480 --> 0:15:31.560 people a bit uncomfortable, and especially when you're younger and 0:15:31.600 --> 0:15:34.400 talking about your feelings isn't really as popular as it 0:15:34.440 --> 0:15:36.960 is now. And so it actually meant that I left 0:15:36.960 --> 0:15:42.320 home really young. Wow, I just turned seventeen to go 0:15:42.360 --> 0:15:45.360 to university because where was it. I went to Canberra, 0:15:45.440 --> 0:15:48.240 so I'm in Australia. It's really uncommon to move away 0:15:48.280 --> 0:15:51.320 from your home city. But I think I was just like, 0:15:51.360 --> 0:15:52.440 I need to, I need to. 0:15:52.640 --> 0:15:54.600 How far is Canberra. From Melbourne, it's. 0:15:54.480 --> 0:15:58.120 Around an eight hour drive, so yeah, and it was. 0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:00.440 It wasn't in Australia, that's not that far, but in 0:16:00.480 --> 0:16:04.160 other places, you know, in Europe's that's really fast. So 0:16:04.960 --> 0:16:07.520 and I moved out of home and I think that's 0:16:07.600 --> 0:16:09.480 this is gonna sound weird, but I think that's where 0:16:09.520 --> 0:16:14.680 like I really came alive and I became a person 0:16:14.840 --> 0:16:18.400 rather than just someone who has memories and other people's 0:16:18.440 --> 0:16:19.120 thoughts about me. 0:16:19.920 --> 0:16:22.520 What made you kind of blossom in that way from 0:16:22.920 --> 0:16:24.240 your high school to college. 0:16:24.760 --> 0:16:27.080 I think it was like, I'm in this new place, 0:16:27.160 --> 0:16:28.200 no one knows who I am. 0:16:28.640 --> 0:16:29.880 You can make your own identity. 0:16:30.160 --> 0:16:32.760 Yeah, and it actually was. That was such a good 0:16:32.840 --> 0:16:35.760 question because it it was like I didn't actually need 0:16:35.760 --> 0:16:38.160 to make my own identity. It was like my identity 0:16:38.520 --> 0:16:40.680 was already there and I just let people see it. 0:16:41.440 --> 0:16:44.600 And I just met the best people I've ever met 0:16:44.640 --> 0:16:47.720 in my life. I'm still really really close with them, 0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:53.440 and they were just so intelligent. It was this shared 0:16:53.560 --> 0:16:56.760 value set. We'd all moved away from home in an 0:16:56.880 --> 0:17:00.200 environment where that's not common for a reason, and we 0:17:00.240 --> 0:17:02.120 moved into the shed and living We lived in this 0:17:02.360 --> 0:17:06.720 massive dorm at five hundred and fifty people and the 0:17:06.800 --> 0:17:10.320 kitchen actually it was self catered. Was the largest non industrial, 0:17:10.440 --> 0:17:14.639 non commercial kitchen in the Southern Hemisphere. Oh it stud 0:17:15.040 --> 0:17:15.720 for students. 0:17:15.840 --> 0:17:19.080 Yeah, did they have Chefso you were all just allowed 0:17:19.080 --> 0:17:20.639 to go in there and make your own food. 0:17:21.000 --> 0:17:22.240 Can you imagine what that was like? 0:17:22.440 --> 0:17:22.919 I can't. 0:17:23.119 --> 0:17:25.720 Yeah, I'll give you one word, messy Yeah. 0:17:25.600 --> 0:17:26.480 Messy, messy. 0:17:26.880 --> 0:17:27.479 It was gross. 0:17:27.760 --> 0:17:29.320 Yeah, So what would you do? 0:17:29.320 --> 0:17:31.400 Would you go in there is just clean up before 0:17:31.440 --> 0:17:33.640 you started, or would you just sort of how did 0:17:33.680 --> 0:17:34.879 you work in a kitchen like that? 0:17:36.160 --> 0:17:38.280 Yeah, you need to clean up. Also, you'd have to 0:17:38.320 --> 0:17:42.280 lock away your stuff because everyone's everyone's poorly. Everyone wants 0:17:42.359 --> 0:17:45.000 you know, if you have low pack butter that was 0:17:45.040 --> 0:17:48.480 such like a luxury item that would go missing so quickly, 0:17:49.200 --> 0:17:53.080 or avocados, oh, don't even try it. And so we 0:17:53.119 --> 0:17:55.720 would come down and we would actually you'd have a 0:17:55.760 --> 0:17:57.560 little group. You never wanted to go alone because it 0:17:57.560 --> 0:18:00.400 was so intimidating. There's five hundred people and a kitchen 0:18:00.480 --> 0:18:03.520 and we're all eighteen, and we're all uncomfortable in ourselves, 0:18:03.560 --> 0:18:07.960 and you know, doing we feel embarrassed just by being alive. 0:18:08.240 --> 0:18:11.440 At that age, I think, and you would always text 0:18:11.440 --> 0:18:13.760 your friends and be like, okay, anyone want to eat 0:18:13.840 --> 0:18:17.080 and we'd come down. We would cook together, and there 0:18:17.119 --> 0:18:22.359 was the staple meals, right, pesto pasta of course, a 0:18:22.400 --> 0:18:26.680 stir fry naturally, and then always a frozen meal. 0:18:27.080 --> 0:18:29.159 Oh okay, I know that, sad okay. 0:18:30.359 --> 0:18:34.560 I never did that, And will you step what were 0:18:34.600 --> 0:18:35.800 you studying at the time? 0:18:36.400 --> 0:18:40.280 So I obviously studied psychology, but then little no fact, 0:18:40.320 --> 0:18:44.520 I also studied a Bachelor of Politics, economics and philosophy. 0:18:44.680 --> 0:18:47.320 So I wanted to be a politician. 0:18:46.960 --> 0:18:49.320 Did you Yeah, I can understand that. 0:18:49.200 --> 0:18:53.359 I was really invested in becoming the Minister for women 0:18:53.920 --> 0:18:55.760 at the time in Australia. Was a man who was 0:18:55.760 --> 0:18:58.480 the Minister for women doesn't make any sense. And I 0:18:58.520 --> 0:19:00.639 was like, I find that's so uncomfort. I want to 0:19:00.720 --> 0:19:03.400 change that. I want to work for defat, I want 0:19:03.440 --> 0:19:06.359 to change women's lives. I want to change people's lives. 0:19:07.160 --> 0:19:12.560 And then I think I slowly became someone else. And 0:19:12.680 --> 0:19:15.600 I always had this fascination with psychology. 0:19:14.960 --> 0:19:18.360 Because the psychology is really interesting in terms of what 0:19:18.400 --> 0:19:22.840 you're doing now. But that path through the psychology at 0:19:22.960 --> 0:19:23.760 at university. 0:19:23.800 --> 0:19:25.639 What was that? What did you learn? 0:19:26.320 --> 0:19:30.120 I learned so much? I was but I learned so much. 0:19:30.119 --> 0:19:32.159 But then at the time, I had stopped working in 0:19:32.160 --> 0:19:36.159 the restaurant and I started working in child mal treatment 0:19:36.200 --> 0:19:39.760 research because it paid really well. At first, I was like, oh, 0:19:39.800 --> 0:19:42.080 this is I have this background and I've learned all 0:19:42.080 --> 0:19:44.720 these things, and this job is going to pay really well. 0:19:44.760 --> 0:19:47.399 And then suddenly I was like, it doesn't matter if 0:19:47.400 --> 0:19:49.240 this doesn't pay well. This is like what I want 0:19:49.280 --> 0:19:51.879 to do. So I'd just done a One of the 0:19:51.880 --> 0:19:55.639 best courses I ever did was personality psychology and then 0:19:55.680 --> 0:19:59.719 also developmental psychology, and I think when we think about psychology, 0:19:59.720 --> 0:20:03.439