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Speaker 1: Took my wedding ring off at the gym, and then

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Speaker 1: a girl approached me, and you wouldn't believe.

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Speaker 2: What she said.

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Speaker 3: You know, you're over here lifting weights, trying to pump

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Speaker 3: that iron when you should really be lifting me to

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Speaker 3: the Good Lord, our Savior.

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Speaker 1: Trying to pump that iron, but you should really be

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Speaker 1: pumping that iron dick inside of me.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's oh. I got some protein for you.

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Speaker 1: Oh that dude, I got a protein shake weights you

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Speaker 1: can just shake into your mouth. You're delicious. I've recently

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Speaker 1: arrived home following this f up. I am very happily married,

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Speaker 1: thirty six male with a small herd of children, and

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Speaker 1: have been going to the gym in my little town

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Speaker 1: since November twenty twenty two. Okay, I always go after

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Speaker 1: the kids go to bed, which generally puts me there

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Speaker 1: around eight thirty pm. The gym has two rooms, one

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Speaker 1: for cardio equipment ellipticals, treadmills, bikes, and the other room

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Speaker 1: has free weights in various other torture devices. My routine

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Speaker 1: begins the same way every day, with nine to nine

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Speaker 1: and a half miles on the bike, which leaves me

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Speaker 1: in a state similar to a Walruss that has managed

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Speaker 1: to pull himself onto an iceberg, very wet and breathing heavily.

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Speaker 2: Wow. I love the description.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I do love it. Love it much like a

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Speaker 1: walrus when it's finally on the iceberg chilling out. This

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Speaker 1: process takes me to about eight to fifty five PM.

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Speaker 2: I love the exact time, eight fifty five.

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Speaker 1: I enjoy hitting weights at this time because the gym

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Speaker 1: is often not always empty, and it leads me to

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Speaker 1: grunt and grow it in piece. Oh yeah, tonight the

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Speaker 1: gym was not empty. When I entered the weight room.

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Speaker 1: There was someone there John, Oh my she now. I

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Speaker 1: mentioned that I've been going to the gym since early November.

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Speaker 1: In that time, I've gotten used to people that do

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Speaker 1: spend time in the gym past nine and this person

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Speaker 1: was new.

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Speaker 2: Hmmm, not a big deal.

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Speaker 1: She had brought her own yoga mat the ones in

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Speaker 1: the gym that are blue and red. The ones in

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Speaker 1: the gym are blue and red. And this one was

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Speaker 1: Ti Diish freaking hippie ooo, and she had her phone

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Speaker 1: set up on a stand. I assumed she was making

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Speaker 1: a video some kind of influencer. Both of these observations

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Speaker 1: were made as I walked down to my rusty trusty

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Speaker 1: bench and started my bent over rose. I grabbed my

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Speaker 1: dumbbells and sat down to continue my ritual, and then

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Speaker 1: I asked up. Uh oh, So I always removed my

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Speaker 1: wedding ring before I left and tuck it right into

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Speaker 1: my sock for safe keeping. If I try to wear

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Speaker 1: any digs into my hand, it makes things most unpleasant, right,

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Speaker 1: So I started grunting out reps, oh God, and just

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Speaker 1: nicely switched to lefty when I felt the tap of

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Speaker 1: my shoulder. Who is it? So I stopped what I

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Speaker 1: was doing and turned to see this new girl standing

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Speaker 1: behind me, sporning a menacing glare and wielding her iPhone

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Speaker 1: like this. So I popped out my ear bud and asked,

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Speaker 1: he what's up? And this is the following conversation laid

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Speaker 1: on me. Hey, what's up? New girl? You're disgusting me?

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Speaker 1: Excuse me? You saw me in here and you took

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Speaker 1: off your ring planning on chatting me up.

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Speaker 3: Ha.

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Speaker 1: This is a little paraphrase. She swore a little too

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Speaker 1: much and I wasn't taking perfect notes. Me what new girl?

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Speaker 1: A gross me? Okay? I proceeded to put my earbuds

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Speaker 1: back in and get to work. While she stormed to

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Speaker 1: the other side of the gym and started packing up

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Speaker 1: her stuff. I watched her head for the exit while

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Speaker 1: I was resting between sets. Anyway, I'm rowing away and

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Speaker 1: out of nowhere. I'm ass blasted with a cascade of liquid,

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Speaker 1: which leads me to drop my dumbbell and spin around

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Speaker 1: to see what the heck's going on?

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Speaker 3: What?

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Speaker 1: And there she is New Girl with her recently empty

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Speaker 1: pink yetti, screaming at me. I'm assuming for being gross,

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Speaker 1: but it's unclear because I still have my buds in.

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Speaker 1: I removed my earbuds so I can understand her, and

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Speaker 1: she storms away. I think the highlight of the exchange

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Speaker 1: is my gym shirt now smells like vodka? Do most

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Speaker 1: people drink at the gym?

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Speaker 2: Am?

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Speaker 1: I doing this wrong?

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Speaker 2: Oh my god?

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Speaker 1: I'm home showered and explain why my shirt smells like

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Speaker 1: I've been raging at a party to my wife and

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Speaker 1: we will had a good laugh. If I see new

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Speaker 1: Girl's video on social media, I'll be sure to share

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Speaker 1: it here. I don't know who she was, but it's

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Speaker 1: a pretty small town, so she might pop up.

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Speaker 3: Wow, you know, I am so glad that we got

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Speaker 3: we got another filthy, disgusting, crusty man out of here.

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Speaker 2: Sam.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't believe he has the audacity to take

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Speaker 1: off his wedding ring. Oh, although my dad, I don't

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Speaker 1: think my dad ever takes off his wedding ring. See

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Speaker 1: that's commitment, that's commitment. It says till death. Do you

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Speaker 1: take off this ring? Till and there's no exceptions.

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Speaker 2: There's no exception. You finger falls off, stick up ring.

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Speaker 1: Sorry if you're trying to beat one out, that ring

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Speaker 1: stays on, baby, No, sir, re my dad Actually even

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Speaker 1: he'll use like hell he said, as a bottle open

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Speaker 1: or sometime. And that's love.

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Speaker 2: That that that is love, Sam, that is love.

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Speaker 1: And would you take off your your wedding ring?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we're kind of like yeah, I again, if it's

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Speaker 3: like something like oh also playing drums.

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Speaker 2: I used to wear a ring all the time.

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Speaker 3: And you would take it off and I would I

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Speaker 3: would like keep it on sometimes, like it's almost like

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Speaker 3: going to sleep with your contacts and sometimes you just

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Speaker 3: get lazy. But then I'm like, I shouldn't do this,

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Speaker 3: Like it's is stupid.

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Speaker 1: What do you think about tattooing a ring on your finger?

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Speaker 3: I knew I had a friend that did that. Really, yes,

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Speaker 3: and and he met her when he was fifteen, like

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Speaker 3: in their thirties doing great. Oh, it's great because of

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Speaker 3: the gym. He did it because like he wanted to

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Speaker 3: take it off during the gym, but also have that

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Speaker 3: he he was a good he he's a good looking man.

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Speaker 3: He's a zach Efron looking looking boy. Really yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 3: so ladies were just coming up to him like what

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Speaker 3: was good?

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Speaker 1: Excuse me? Did you see this tattoo that I'm married?

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Speaker 3: Someone suggested in the comments a silicone ring? Hmmm, So

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Speaker 3: it's just like jelly and you're given.

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Speaker 1: The thing is how he's gonna cheat?

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Speaker 2: How could we forget that one?

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Speaker 3: How can he give us more Reddit stories of him bothering?

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Speaker 1: Milk?

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Speaker 2: You for all your worth, bro, milking hard? You know

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Speaker 2: what else? We want a milk from people? Sam?

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Speaker 1: Oh, you're sweet. Sweet Reddit story. So if you have

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Speaker 1: a story that you want to share and you want

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Speaker 1: us to read, go to our slash Okayo p show

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Speaker 1: and we'll read that. The ship out of that ship

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Speaker 1: baby like that story. Check out this one where she

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Speaker 1: cheated but it's not her fault. Makes sense? Makes sense?

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Speaker 1: I slept and fell oops, right on that deck.

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Speaker 2: Ouchi Auchi