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Speaker 1: Hey, it's Brook and Jeffrey in this is the Second

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Speaker 1: Date podcast. And I don't know if the best part

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Speaker 1: of Textual Healing is the actual help or just the

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Speaker 1: intro song.

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Speaker 2: It's so good. It's my favorite show open that we

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Speaker 2: have love it. So it is just singing just so

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Speaker 2: you know. Gots coming up in just a minute.

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Speaker 3: But first comment, Yeah, Amanda Nichols said, I'm a full

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Speaker 3: time college student majoring in computer science. I never thought

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Speaker 3: I would find myself getting addicted to a random morning

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Speaker 3: radio show the way I have.

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Speaker 2: With this one.

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Speaker 3: I've definitely developed a parasocial relationship with these guys and

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Speaker 3: never failed to brighten up my morning commute to class.

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Speaker 2: So happy I found this show. And I love when

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Speaker 2: our listeners use big words we don't unders. I know

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Speaker 2: it's gonna have to google that, lad.

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Speaker 1: I love our paranormal relationship parasouck.

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Speaker 2: Okay, let's just get into it. The textual Healing starts now.

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Speaker 4: I don't know about you guys, but I've never been

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Speaker 4: caught doing weird stuff at work, you people. I mean,

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Speaker 4: I definitely do it, and whoever sees it usually wants

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Speaker 4: to join in, So technically I'm not he costs.

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Speaker 2: I mean, you're just not told on right.

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Speaker 4: I see. For one of our listeners, she says she

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Speaker 4: was coming home to her apartment the other day and

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Speaker 4: came across her landlord in a very compromising position, and

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Speaker 4: what she decided to do next could be either the

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Speaker 4: smartest or dumbest move of her entire life. Oday, she

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Speaker 4: reached out to us, hoping to use the information to

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Speaker 4: her advantage. So we're gonna try and help her in

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Speaker 4: a textual healing coming up next, Text you will heal,

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Speaker 4: then text you will. You know you have a clogged toilet,

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Speaker 4: you call a plumber. Do you have a flat tire,

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Speaker 4: you call triple A. Sure, If you have a text

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Speaker 4: message that you need to send and you don't want

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Speaker 4: to screw it up, who do you call?

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Speaker 2: Jeffrey?

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Speaker 4: You call fifteen other people and ask their answers. Well,

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Speaker 4: if they all suck, then you can come to us

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Speaker 4: for a little textual healing.

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Speaker 2: We got there, and.

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Speaker 4: One of our listeners has gone through her entire friend

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Speaker 4: group came up with nothing, So now she wants our help.

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Speaker 4: Her name is CALLI CALLI Welcome to the show.

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Speaker 5: Hi, thank you so much, please help.

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Speaker 1: I'm glad we're your last resort, Kelly, glad your real.

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Speaker 4: Friends don't answer. Ye, Well, tell us about your situation

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Speaker 4: a little bit and how we can help heal you textually.

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Speaker 5: Okay.

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Speaker 6: So I'm living in this apartment. It's the best apartment

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Speaker 6: that I've ever lived in. It's like a great location.

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Speaker 6: You know, I have like the most amazing view. Apartment

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Speaker 6: complex has a pool.

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Speaker 4: Do they have any availability right now? Doesn't sound like

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Speaker 4: we can afford.

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Speaker 6: To live there, That's the thing. So I can't even

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Speaker 6: afford to live here, like barely right now. And I'm

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Speaker 6: afraid they're going to increase my rent in a couple

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Speaker 6: of months when my rent is supposed to be renewed.

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Speaker 2: Are we going to negotiate your rent via text message?

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Speaker 1: I think we can do it. I think we could.

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Speaker 1: I can talk anybody down.

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Speaker 4: I'm telling you your lease is coming up here? How long?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, in a couple of months about about okay?

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Speaker 6: Okay, but Loki, I need them to reduce the rent

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Speaker 6: by at least one hundred dollars where I'm going to

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Speaker 6: have to move.

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Speaker 2: Oh wow, we're going to get a rent reduction? Does

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Speaker 2: that happen anymore?

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Speaker 1: It does?

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna call exactly what.

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Speaker 4: We do today? Okay, how are you going to get

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Speaker 4: your rent knocked down?

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Speaker 6: The only thought that I have in terms of how

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Speaker 6: I can do this, and I really think I can,

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Speaker 6: is the fact that we have a new property manager. Okay,

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Speaker 6: super cute, and he's about my age. I just have

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Speaker 6: a feeling like if I work them a little bit,

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Speaker 6: massage them a little bit via text message.

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Speaker 1: Okay, are you saying you're gonna start hitting on your

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Speaker 1: new property manager?

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Speaker 6: I like it. I don't want to hit on him,

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Speaker 6: but I have a feeling that, like, uh, you know,

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Speaker 6: I want to.

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Speaker 2: Put a viet you want to create a rapport?

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Speaker 6: Exactly, I need to create a rapport. I need to

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Speaker 6: like get in there and just figure out a way

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Speaker 6: to get Dave the property manager, to sign off on

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Speaker 6: a ret renewal that is preferably less.

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Speaker 1: I was joking about negotiating rent prices. I don't actually

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Speaker 1: know that we're the best people for that.

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Speaker 5: I think I think it's possible.

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Speaker 2: Have you texted with Dave yet? Like, have you met

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Speaker 2: him at all?

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Speaker 5: We've had one interaction.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, that's something to work with.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, he's stooping a rat, a dead rat out of

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Speaker 6: the pool.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, long new place, but it's actually run down.

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Speaker 2: The pool like an above ground like tarp that they

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Speaker 2: set up.

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Speaker 4: It's just in the city. I'm guessing a rat.

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Speaker 6: In the pool, I know. And I saw what he

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Speaker 6: was doing and just like was like ew and then

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Speaker 6: he kind of like laughed like yeah, you know, my

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Speaker 6: job sucks, but Hi, how you doing?

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Speaker 4: What a fun interaction.

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Speaker 1: But that could almost be blackmail, right because she's the

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Speaker 1: only one that saw the rat, and if she told

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Speaker 1: other people. I mean, if we're gonna get dirty with

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Speaker 1: this guy and we want to like get a rent reduction.

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Speaker 4: I don't know if blackmailing your apartment manager is the

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Speaker 4: best way to go.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I like what.

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Speaker 5: I agree?

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Speaker 6: I think we could have like a friendly agreement to

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Speaker 6: like keep that between us, you know, Like the other

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Speaker 6: option is obviously, like should I flirt with them?

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Speaker 5: Should I throw them a smile?

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Speaker 4: Well, we have to do this over a text message? Yes,

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Speaker 4: So I'm going to google tricks to make strangers do

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Speaker 4: stuff for you?

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Speaker 2: Okay, I fell over.

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Speaker 3: Text is the hard part.

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Speaker 2: AI is really going to take over our jobs.

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Speaker 4: This is a twenty one and over website. This isn't

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Speaker 4: seven ways to make a stranger help you out. Number

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Speaker 4: one says smile.

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Speaker 2: Can't do that on the text.

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Speaker 4: You could get a smile emoji, so we could start

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Speaker 4: with a smiley emoji. Number two is used their name

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Speaker 4: a few times, Dave, Dave, Dave. So yeah, Dave, Hey Dave,

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Speaker 4: what's up Dave?

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Speaker 1: Well, I mean you have to start with hey, Dave,

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Speaker 1: Kelly from you know, whatever your apartment number is.

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Speaker 4: Remember I'm I'm the the girl that saw you fish

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Speaker 4: the rat out of the pool and shouted gross.

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Speaker 6: Maybe just be like, I think it's actually perfect.

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Speaker 4: Right at least they put It'll help him put a

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Speaker 4: face to the name.

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Speaker 6: I could be like, I'm the blonde who said ew

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Speaker 6: while you were fishing the rat out of the pool.

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Speaker 3: There are other people with other hair combs.

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Speaker 4: Well, she said gross to him and they had one

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Speaker 4: sentence conversation, So that's good. Number three says used humor. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: maybe maybe telling a joke, It says, even if it

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Speaker 4: doesn't land, it shows you're trying to be fun, and

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Speaker 4: I'd hire you.

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Speaker 2: To be my combanda boy any day of the week.

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Speaker 1: You know, we have a pool for rats.

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Speaker 4: That's how fancy it is.

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Speaker 1: Maybe a rat of tuy Joe could be funny like that.

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Speaker 2: Don't you have to do the little rat emoji?

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Speaker 1: Though?

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Speaker 4: So here's my idea to incorporate everything that we've learned here. Hey, Dave, Dave,

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Speaker 4: I'm that blonde girl who said gross when you pulled

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Speaker 4: the rat out of the pool. And later, maybe you

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Speaker 4: can come by and we can have some ratituey. What

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Speaker 4: do you think, Dave, smiley face? That sounds wow, fatty,

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Speaker 4: but it's going off of the internet suggestions here. The

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Speaker 4: internet is small than any of us.

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Speaker 2: Sound like a computer.

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Speaker 5: Sure?

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Speaker 1: What if the joke is I haven't been able to

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Speaker 1: cook anything all week because that rat was the one

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Speaker 1: teaching me.

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Speaker 4: No, they said there was no bad jokes, but I

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Speaker 4: think we just proved them. I don't know, cal. I mean,

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Speaker 4: the final decision is yours. It's your text message, so

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Speaker 4: you get to decide what you want to write.

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Speaker 6: I mean, I definitely feel like something along the lines

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Speaker 6: like heydays nice. It's Callie from apartment the blonde two

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Speaker 6: said gross when you fish the rat at the pool.

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Speaker 2: Just wanted to welcome you to the building.

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Speaker 6: Oh yeah, I wanted to welcome you to the building.

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Speaker 6: Ratitude at my place, and she sounds.

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Speaker 4: Pretty solid rat emoji.

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Speaker 7: Yeah oh yeah, okay said, I mean, we started off

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Speaker 7: on kind of rocky ground there, but I feel like

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Speaker 7: we ended up with a pretty solid text.

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Speaker 4: I mean, at least I'm sure we're going to get

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Speaker 4: a response. He may be like, what are you on? Like, yeah,

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Speaker 4: you might be victim.

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Speaker 2: Maybe he'll be like, I want some of whatever you're on.

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Speaker 4: You don't respond, that's for sure, let's find out. We're

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Speaker 4: going to continue and see if Dave the apartment manager

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Speaker 4: is going to lower your rent when we do textual.

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Speaker 5: Healing thank you.

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Speaker 4: Right after this, one of our listeners, Calli, is on

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Speaker 4: the phone right now. She loves her apartment, but her

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Speaker 4: lease is coming up, and if she wants to stay,

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Speaker 4: which she desperately does, she's gonna need to get a

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Speaker 4: rent reduction or she won't be able to afford it anymore. Now,

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Speaker 4: a younger single guy has apparently taken over managing her building.

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Speaker 4: His name is Dave, and he is cute from what

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Speaker 4: we hear.

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Speaker 1: That's what she says, because they're only interaction in person

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Speaker 1: has been while she was watching him take a drowned

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Speaker 1: rat out of their pool with a net.

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Speaker 4: And she screamed ew gross. Yeah, and he acknowledged it

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Speaker 4: and was like, yeah, my job is terrible. So essentially

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Speaker 4: he's basically a stranger to her at this point. That's

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Speaker 4: why I googled the top seven ways to make a

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Speaker 4: stranger like you and want to help you instantly, which

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Speaker 4: I feel like has already been on your Google search history. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: it did auto fill the rest of it. So her

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Speaker 4: first text incorporated three points that I came across. It said, One,

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Speaker 4: you should smile, so we used smile emoji. Two, use

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Speaker 4: their name a few times. So we repeated Dave at

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Speaker 4: least three times in.

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Speaker 2: The first text, went once but okay.

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Speaker 4: Well maybe that was our mistake. Number Three, break the

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Speaker 4: ice with some levity or a joke. So we referenced

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Speaker 4: the dead rat that we could do something with ratituey

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Speaker 4: as a meal over at her apartment, Kelly has He responded,

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Speaker 4: he did, why.

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Speaker 2: You sound sad? What did he say?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 6: No, okay, he said, what So you're the tenant who

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Speaker 6: saw me pull the rat out of the pool. You're

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Speaker 6: joking about the ratituy right?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, this is good though.

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Speaker 1: This is good because he's nervous he's nervous. He's nervous,

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Speaker 1: you're gonna rat him out.

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Speaker 3: Okay, we are next.

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Speaker 4: Seventy listeners just tuned away.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I need I need some real advice.

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Speaker 5: Guys, that was real.

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Speaker 4: Let's do the damsel in distress angle where it says, Hey, Dave,

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Speaker 4: I'm in a situation and I could really use your help.

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Speaker 2: So we're saying, hey Dave again.

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Speaker 4: I'm sticking with the suggestions. You need to continue using

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Speaker 4: his name need from.

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Speaker 2: The pool of life.

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Speaker 1: First you say, yes, it was a joke, that's a

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Speaker 1: fair and then you move into I need your help

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Speaker 1: with something.

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Speaker 4: I like that. Coli, I'm like a financial rat drowning

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Speaker 4: in that.

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Speaker 2: But you laugh at him.

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Speaker 4: That was funny.

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Speaker 7: Okay, I expect them from men, expect them.

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Speaker 4: Just tell him like, I seriously need a way to

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Speaker 4: figure out how to lower my rent by one hundred

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Speaker 4: dollars right now.

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Speaker 2: Let's wait till the next text for that slow Jeffrey.

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Speaker 4: Ask for the example if you pointed out my roles,

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Speaker 4: that's really offensive.

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Speaker 6: Okay, I got it, I got it.

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Speaker 5: So Hey Dave, yes, ratitude, he was a joke. I'm

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Speaker 5: actually in.

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Speaker 6: A situation I could use your help. My release is

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Speaker 6: coming up, and I need to find a way to

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Speaker 6: reduce it by at least one hundred dollars.

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Speaker 5: Any idea, I.

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Speaker 1: Just went from like to like very I know it's direct, rat,

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Speaker 1: but you want an answer, so go for it.

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Speaker 2: And it's business relationship right now.

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Speaker 4: And from his last is clear he remembers you.

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Speaker 6: So okay, I send It's okay, I.

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Speaker 4: Said, did you put a smiley emoji on it?

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Speaker 5: Though I did not?

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Speaker 6: Okay, okay, I just that one that went out.

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Speaker 5: Follow up, it's going.

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Speaker 2: To be like a big smiling I mean, that's interesting.

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Speaker 2: We're just we're just oh my.

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Speaker 5: God, oh my god.

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Speaker 6: He's just finding he's an I mean that.

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Speaker 5: Hold on.

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Speaker 2: That, stuy. I'm sorry, it's something they started doing long.

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Speaker 4: Don't apologize for fun. Yes, forgot? What did he what

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Speaker 4: did he write?

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Speaker 6: He wrote, Well, you could get a roommate that would

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Speaker 6: reduce it by a lot more than one hundred dollars.

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Speaker 6: We could see if we can move you into a

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Speaker 6: smaller unit facing the back alley.

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Speaker 4: Now look at the rats.

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Speaker 1: What if you write back and say, Dave, I don't

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Speaker 1: think a view of the of more rats is in

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Speaker 1: my wheelhouse.

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Speaker 4: Yes, that's funny. Let's let's go with that.

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Speaker 2: It's what Jose said. I just reset it. Yeah, seriously, when.

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Speaker 6: I wait, I'm going to make it sound like he

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Speaker 6: made a joke, like, haha, Dave, I don't need a

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Speaker 6: view of more.

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Speaker 7: Rats like they feel funny. I love it, but we

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Speaker 7: need to ask a question to keep him responding. So

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Speaker 7: let's add something to it, like is there any way

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Speaker 7: I could stay in my same apartment and pay less?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 6: Okay, okay, I mean, honestly, what about this?

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Speaker 1: What if you volunteer to be on rat patrol at

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Speaker 1: the pool and they could pay you one hundred dollars?

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Speaker 2: Want to do it?

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Speaker 7: You know?

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Speaker 1: Odd?

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Speaker 5: I don't like. Yeah, gross, that's a lot.

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Speaker 2: Everybody wants the money without working for it.

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Speaker 4: I see you said, Hey, I'm willing to sign a

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Speaker 4: three to maybe four year lease if this will help me.

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Speaker 4: Screw that one hundred year lease. I want to die

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Speaker 4: in this building like that, sping me out. I think rat.

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Speaker 2: Patrol is much better than this.

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Speaker 4: Somewhere you go, this is anybody else?

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Speaker 6: He said, I don't think there's any way you can

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Speaker 6: stay here and pay less unless you want to help

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Speaker 6: me get rid of the rat right, what is inside

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Speaker 6: joke turn into me becoming like the rat patrol.

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Speaker 5: I can't, I can't.

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Speaker 1: My dad uses these poison traps that they don't even

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Speaker 1: barely have to deal with a carcass doing a breakdown

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Speaker 1: of how to kill rats they have like the new

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Speaker 1: stuff they have is amazing, although a good old fashion.

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Speaker 4: I'm so sorry, are you willing to kill rats?

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Speaker 6: I don't even want to talk about it? But I

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Speaker 6: just asked them, are you sure, Dave? Is there anything

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Speaker 6: else you could be?

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Speaker 2: The red queen? He could be the ret key.

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Speaker 4: Mat Me put a smiley face after those texts.

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Speaker 5: Don't forget that last one. I definitely did not.

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Speaker 1: Okay, well, maybe this is time to compromise.

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Speaker 4: And then he says, if you do this, then he

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Speaker 4: did two hundred dollars off.

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Speaker 1: Your red Say you're going to do it, then start

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Speaker 1: dating an exterminator and get him to come in and

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Speaker 1: do the work.

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Speaker 4: Stop trying to live out your fantasy. To our listeners,

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Speaker 4: most people dream of a pizza boy.

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Speaker 2: I bet they don't have a lot of options in

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Speaker 2: the day.

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Speaker 4: Let's get back to the texts. Is that so we said?

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Speaker 4: Is there anything else that you can do?

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Speaker 5: Are you sure?

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Speaker 6: David, is there anything else? And he is typing again.

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Speaker 6: He says, we have an ant problem in the northwest

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Speaker 6: part of the building.

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Speaker 2: That what isn't living in your apartment building?

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Speaker 4: Now you work there too.

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Speaker 6: I mean, first he wanted me to do deal with

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Speaker 6: the rats, and now he wants me to get rid

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Speaker 6: of the ant.

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Speaker 2: Are you open to that?

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Speaker 4: Because I have been there in a second, I can't

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Speaker 4: wait to kill a bunch of.

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Speaker 6: Honest Okay, well, you I think if you knock off,

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Speaker 6: if you knock off to hundred, I'll do.

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Speaker 2: The rat negotiations. You're gonna get it.

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Speaker 4: That's good.

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Speaker 5: I'll do the rat thing.

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Speaker 6: Okay, can you send me a link for like the

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Speaker 6: poison traps that you're down?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely can. I'll text my dad right now. He

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Speaker 2: loves this stuff. Are you kidding me?

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Speaker 4: Brook will do a whole podcast about properly. I feel

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Speaker 4: my dad textually healed you now at this point, right Kelly,

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Speaker 4: Oh my.

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Speaker 6: Gosh, Dave, Dave.

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Speaker 5: Dave just texted back deal.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, Now you're the rat lady in the building. Are

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Speaker 4: there any snakes in there too? For free?

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Speaker 2: It's probably more likely raccoon.

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Speaker 6: Well, I'll let you know if I end up with

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Speaker 6: the bubonic plate, but I think I get to keep

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Speaker 6: the apartment.

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Speaker 1: Well.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, if you ever want textual healing, please email someone else.

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Speaker 6: Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.

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Speaker 2: Oh what we won't do for cheaper rent?

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Speaker 6: For real rats?

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Speaker 4: Rat?

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Speaker 6: Would you?

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Speaker 1: Would you hunt down some rats for Twitter bucks? Off

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Speaker 1: your red I just.

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Speaker 2: Hate rats so much. I said that I could do

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Speaker 2: with spiders.

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Speaker 1: Yes, if you think of rats just as little big mice,

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Speaker 1: I still don't like that. You don't like little bigger mice?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, enormous, little baby. Did you say rats?

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Speaker 7: No?

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Speaker 2: Bro, Okay, the spiders you can handle. Yeah, I could

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Speaker 2: do that. For what do I do? Jose?

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Speaker 1: What do you?

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Speaker 2: What do you think you could take down?

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Speaker 4: I would never kill an animal because I'm a saint.

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Speaker 2: Killing capture and bring it to a new hull.

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Speaker 4: No, to be honest, I'm scared of all animals.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, nobody captures rats and brings them to New.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, back to the sewer, little guy.

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Speaker 4: My life's changed seven.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much for being here. This is a

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Speaker 1: Bricka Jeffrey Second Day podcast. It's the official one, so

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Speaker 1: we'd love you to subscribe it in.

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Speaker 2: The world to us and do what you need to

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Speaker 2: do to get that two hundred dollars off your red. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: let us know what you end up doing. Yeah, totally