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Speaker 1: Hey fam, Hello Sunshine. Today on the bright Side, learn

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Speaker 1: the science back secrets to lift your mood and boost

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Speaker 1: your happiness. It's Wellness Wednesday, and happiness expert Karen Guggenheim

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Speaker 1: is here to share the simple yet powerful steps you

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Speaker 1: can take even when life feels overwhelming, plus the number

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Speaker 1: one action you can start today to create more happiness

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Speaker 1: in your life. It's Wednesday, September eleventh. I'm Danielle Robe.

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Speaker 2: And I'm Simone Boyce and this is the bright Side

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Speaker 2: from Hello Sunshine, a daily show where we come together

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Speaker 2: to share women's stories, laugh, learn and brighten your day.

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Speaker 2: Today's Wellness Wednesday is presented by Coliguard.

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Speaker 1: So today, before we dive into our show about happiness,

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Speaker 1: I think let's all take a small pause to remember

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Speaker 1: the events of September eleventh, a day that forever changed

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Speaker 1: things for us as Americans. I know I was personally

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Speaker 1: changed by it. It's a day etched in our collective memory,

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Speaker 1: reminding us of profound loss and unimaginable courage and the

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Speaker 1: resilience of the human spirit. And as we honor the

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Speaker 1: lives that were lost and those who bravely stepped up

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Speaker 1: in the face of tragedy. We also reflect on how

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Speaker 1: moments like these shape us. I think they remind us

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Speaker 1: of the importance of community and kindness and finding light

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Speaker 1: even in the darkest of times.

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Speaker 2: I think we can all remember where we were when

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Speaker 2: we saw the towers get hit, and I was in

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Speaker 2: middle school at the time. I was in class and

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Speaker 2: I can vividly remember watching it with all of my classmates.

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Speaker 2: And I think something shifted in me that day too, Danielle,

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Speaker 2: I think that moment really galvanized my resolve to become

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Speaker 2: a journalist one day.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes so much sense, because in the aftermath

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Speaker 1: of seismic moments like that, we all are searching for

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Speaker 1: ways to heal and to rediscover joy. Really, so today

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Speaker 1: we'll be exploring how happiness and well being can not

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Speaker 1: only exist alongside hardship, but also grow from it. We've

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Speaker 1: talked about happiness on this show a few times and

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Speaker 1: in different ways. I think my favorite idea about it

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Speaker 1: is that happiness is.

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Speaker 3: A muscle, not a mindset.

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Speaker 1: But we've also joked about happiness, right We've talked about

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Speaker 1: sitting in your car for a few minutes to look

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Speaker 1: after yourself, or of course, the importance of touching grass.

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Speaker 2: It really works. I will say that it really does work,

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Speaker 2: you know, Danielle. The older I get, the less I know.

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Speaker 2: But one thing I'm totally sure of is that I

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Speaker 2: need nature in my life every day to stay happy.

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Speaker 2: I think even just like a little bit of nature,

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Speaker 2: a little encounter with nature can do wonders for your

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Speaker 2: mood and wellbeing. For instance, there's this study I came

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Speaker 2: across that showed that patients who had plants and flowers

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Speaker 2: in their hospital rooms had way shorter stays in the hospital,

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Speaker 2: used fewer pain meds, and felt less pain, anxiety, and fatigue.

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Speaker 2: So it's in the science. It really really works. It's

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Speaker 2: incredible just how having a piece of nature, even removed

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Speaker 2: from its environment in your perspective can really change everything.

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Speaker 1: That's the gorpcore and you Simone, I love it.

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Speaker 3: It's true. Okay.

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Speaker 1: I have two things that bring me a ton of happiness,

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Speaker 1: quick little things. The first one, please guess, three guests

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Speaker 1: is the first one doesn't count?

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Speaker 3: What do you think it is? Sleep? Yes?

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Speaker 1: I really feel like sleep is a game changer. And

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Speaker 1: I don't mean it just as a joke as a

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Speaker 1: sleepy girl. I think if you feel like quitting something,

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Speaker 1: if you're crying, if if anything, like, the first question

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Speaker 1: should be am I exhausted or is this a real feeling?

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Speaker 1: For me?

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Speaker 3: It's usually exhaustion.

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Speaker 1: But the second thing that brings me happiness that I've

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Speaker 1: noticed mostly in my adult life is girlfriends. And I

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Speaker 1: don't mean that in a trite way, Like I have

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Speaker 1: two girlfriends from college that live in la and we

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Speaker 1: try and see each other at least every two or

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Speaker 1: three weeks, and we just giggle. We laugh so hard,

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Speaker 1: and no matter what any of us is going through,

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Speaker 1: like if it's a breakup or a parent is sick

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Speaker 1: or anything, just giggling with old friends brings so much

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Speaker 1: serotonin to your brain.

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Speaker 2: This is honestly a huge requirement for me when I'm

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Speaker 2: thinking about, Okay, who do I want to hang out with?

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Speaker 3: If we're not laughing, I'm.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, we're not ry hanging out, or at least I'm

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Speaker 2: not seeing you that often because I got enough of my.

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Speaker 3: Life that I'm not laughing about.

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Speaker 2: Like when I'm with my friends and taking the time

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Speaker 2: to do that, I need to laugh.

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Speaker 1: One thousand percent. And you know, the word happiness can

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Speaker 1: sometimes feel abstract. It's like, how do we even get there,

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Speaker 1: especially when happiness feels out of reach. And so today

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Speaker 1: we're breaking down and offering science backsteps to find the

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Speaker 1: happiness that we all deserve.

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Speaker 2: Our guest today is a true pioneer in the global

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Speaker 2: happiness movement and a leader in promoting the science behind

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Speaker 2: happiness and well being. Her name is Karen Guggenheim, and

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Speaker 2: she's the co founder of the World Happiness Summit. It's

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Speaker 2: this conference that brings together experts from around the world

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Speaker 2: to explore the science behind happiness and also learn about

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Speaker 2: practical tools to help increase well being in all areas

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Speaker 2: of life.

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Speaker 3: She's also the.

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Speaker 2: Founder of the World Wellbeing Policy Forum and the CEO

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Speaker 2: of the well being platform WILLHASU, which organizes both the

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Speaker 2: Forum and the World Happiness Summit.

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Speaker 1: And while all of that is incredibly impressive and important

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Speaker 1: to me, it's her personal story that's the most inspiring,

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Speaker 1: because she experienced devastating loss in twenty thirteen and it

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Speaker 1: was that loss, that seismic moment that kickstarted what she

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Speaker 1: calls her intentional happiness journey.

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Speaker 2: Her debut book is coming out next month. It's called

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Speaker 2: Cultivating Happiness, and it's a practical and accessible guide to

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Speaker 2: dealing with adversity and leading more fulfilled and purposeful lives. Well,

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Speaker 2: Karen is here with us. Now let's go ahead and

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Speaker 2: bring her in. Welcome to the bright side.

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Speaker 3: Hi everybody, how are you?

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Speaker 2: We are here to talk all about happiness and how

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Speaker 2: we can all cultivate it in our own lives. And

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Speaker 2: I want to take a moment to talk about how

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Speaker 2: you define happiness not as an emotion necessarily, but more

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Speaker 2: as a skill. How did you arrive there at that belief?

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Speaker 3: Well, let me tell you first how I arrived at it,

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Speaker 3: and then what my definition is. So actually my happiness

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Speaker 3: journey was bumpy, and the origin it really is with

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Speaker 3: unhappiness and actually loss. So eleven years ago I lost

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Speaker 3: my husband. He died suddenly from the flu, believe it

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Speaker 3: or not, before COVID, when I guess it was huge

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Speaker 3: shocker that people actually die from the flu. You know,

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Speaker 3: At first it was total heartbreak, and I wanted to

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Speaker 3: shut off to life and I didn't really want to

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Speaker 3: live anymore, and nothing was ever going to be good again.

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Speaker 3: I wanted to just go inward, and then I remembered

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Speaker 3: I had children, and then I decided that I had

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Speaker 3: to live for my kids and if I was going

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Speaker 3: to live. I made that decision that I was going

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Speaker 3: to live happy, and I didn't know what that looked like.

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Speaker 3: I did understand that it wasn't going to be continual

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Speaker 3: joyful feelings, but that I would be able to enjoy

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Speaker 3: life again, be fully alive again, and so I made

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Speaker 3: that choice to be happy. And my journey was through

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Speaker 3: purpose and meaning. And the first step actually was understanding

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Speaker 3: that it was going to hurt. So I had to

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Speaker 3: walk into the pain, walk into the fire with the

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Speaker 3: hope that it was going to be okay afterwards and

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Speaker 3: I would be able to heal. And so my definition

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Speaker 3: of happiness is more about you know, wellbeing, So looking

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Speaker 3: at the different elements and dimensions of well being that

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Speaker 3: when you cultivate and work on naturally makes more opportunities

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Speaker 3: to feel positive emotions. So everybody loves joy, loves positive emotion,

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Speaker 3: but sometimes life happens and that can be either disappointing

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Speaker 3: and makes you angry, painful, et cetera. And it's so

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Speaker 3: important to feel those feelings. But through working on our relationships,

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Speaker 3: our physical body, our careers or a financial well being,

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Speaker 3: the community as well, and giving to others. So those

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Speaker 3: are the ways that I build my happiness. So four

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Speaker 3: months after he died, I was getting an NBA George

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Speaker 3: Son University. And when I found out that there was

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Speaker 3: a science to this and there are steps to it

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Speaker 3: and frameworks to become happier, I wanted as many people

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Speaker 3: as possible to know that, to learn from that. And

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Speaker 3: so I get to have an event and an organization

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Speaker 3: and a community that largely lives up to the legacy

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Speaker 3: of who my husband was. He was a very kind man,

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Speaker 3: he was a scientist. So it's teaching people how to

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Speaker 3: become happier from a data driven perspective. I feel that

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Speaker 3: I carry his legacy. It was bad enough that he

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Speaker 3: died and he didn't get to see his children grow up,

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Speaker 3: and I wasn't going to have his whole legacy be

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Speaker 3: pain and loss because I could do something about that.

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Speaker 3: And in that feeling, in that sense of empowerment and

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Speaker 3: agency that I could do something about it, that was

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Speaker 3: such a driving force to my healing and then to

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Speaker 3: the work that I do today.

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Speaker 2: Do you remember the first day that you started to

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Speaker 2: feel happiness again after the loss of your husband.

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Speaker 3: I can tell you that I remember about eleven ish

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Speaker 3: months after he died, and I was with my cohort

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Speaker 3: at Georgetown and somebody said a joke and I was

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Speaker 3: like analyzing me, and I was saying, that's really funny,

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Speaker 3: But does a widow laugh It's been eleven months? Is

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Speaker 3: it the right time to laugh? Should I wait for

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Speaker 3: a year to laugh? Like I'm having this whole inner conversation, right,

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Speaker 3: And then I said, you know, in the same way,

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Speaker 3: that is very important not to negate my feelings around

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Speaker 3: pain and not to sugarcoat something or go into like

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Speaker 3: toxic positivity. It's also authentic that in this moment, I

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Speaker 3: find this funny and I'm gonna laugh. And I gave

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Speaker 3: myself permission to laugh and to break stereotypes and to like, okay,

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Speaker 3: widows laugh and then sometimes I cry. But that was

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Speaker 3: about the first time that I really like, yeah, I'm

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Speaker 3: gonna laugh, I'm gonna let it flow.

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Speaker 1: You know, that's really beautiful When you look back on

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Speaker 1: that time, I know you're about practical steps. What was

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Speaker 1: something that you did that really made a difference.

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Speaker 3: First going to Georgetown and deciding to live and to

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Speaker 3: do something about it and to retrain. I had to

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Speaker 3: retrain I also wanted to meet people because I knew

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Speaker 3: that social connection was so important, and then of course

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Speaker 3: dedicating my life to promoting well being at scale through

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Speaker 3: the world happiness. It was like the most impactful thing

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Speaker 3: for myself personally that I was able to do, because

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Speaker 3: in helping others, I heal myself. And also a really

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Speaker 3: important part, I think is the narratives that we tell

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Speaker 3: ourselves about ourselves and who we are in our lives.

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Speaker 3: And so I knew that I didn't want to be

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Speaker 3: a victim. I wanted to be a hero of my life,

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Speaker 3: and so I purposefully did not spend time in the

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Speaker 3: victim role. Why me, you know, why so young? What

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Speaker 3: if I would have taken him to a different hospital,

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Speaker 3: et cetera, et cetera. So I just went into what

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Speaker 3: can I control? What is positive, what's constructive? And I

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Speaker 3: think it's so important to tap into your strengths, and

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Speaker 3: so some of my strengths are curiosity and encourage. So

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Speaker 3: a lot of people know about post traumatic stress disorder,

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Speaker 3: but there's another concept, which is post traumatic growth. It

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Speaker 3: is going through the trauma and you know the challenge

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Speaker 3: and you grow from the experience. You don't bypass the pain,

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Speaker 3: but you grow from and so that's what happened to me,

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Speaker 3: you know, after feeling this incredible amount of pain. Because

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Speaker 3: by the way, for those of you who are listening

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Speaker 3: to this and our moms, when you see your kids

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Speaker 3: in pain, that takes it to a whole new level.

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Speaker 3: And so to see my children suffer, and there's nothing

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Speaker 3: that I could do except hold space for them because

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Speaker 3: I couldn't bring their father back. Obviously, there was a

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Speaker 3: lot of pain and a lot of loss, but a

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Speaker 3: lot of transformation because I didn't attach to the pain.

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Speaker 3: I just let the pain go through me whichever many

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Speaker 3: times it was going to go through me like waves,

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Speaker 3: and I accepted the feelings and like go of the feelings.

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Speaker 3: And I think it's super important to go through the

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Speaker 3: loss and the feelings of that and the grief and

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Speaker 3: then let it go so that you can have fertile

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Speaker 3: ground for your own happiness.

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Speaker 2: This conversation is so bright side. I love the contrast

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Speaker 2: between post traumatic stress disorder versus post traumatic growth. That's

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Speaker 2: so empowering to know that there's another lens through which

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Speaker 2: to view trauma. And we also you're on the bright side.

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Speaker 2: Love a framework, and Karen, you have created this framework

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Speaker 2: that you call the bridge to happiness, and you created

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Speaker 2: it for anyone out there who wants to just bring

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Speaker 2: more happiness into their daily lives. You say that the

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Speaker 2: beginning step is choice. Now I can see the eye

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Speaker 2: rolls happening now, right, Like, I'm thinking of my friends

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Speaker 2: who are currently going through depressive episodes, mental health episodes,

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Speaker 2: and I know what they're thinking. It's not that easy, simon.

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Speaker 2: It's not that easy, Karen, to just view happiness as

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Speaker 2: a choice. Will you break down why that is so effective?

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Speaker 1: Though?

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Speaker 3: It depends on your definition of happiness. So if you're

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Speaker 3: expecting life to always be easy and to be challenged

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Speaker 3: free and to be one positive, you know fast it's

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Speaker 3: not going to be like that. So for me, that

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Speaker 3: was also something that really helped me was understanding that

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Speaker 3: life can be hard. Okay, that made it easier, believe

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Speaker 3: it or not. Like, Okay, life is hard and many

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Speaker 3: times really hard, right and for a lot of people,

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Speaker 3: much harder than for me. And it is difficult and

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Speaker 3: challenging to go through the steps, right, particularly if you're

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Speaker 3: dealing with a mental health issue. Okay, those are really

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Speaker 3: hard because it's inside your head. I've suffered with anxiety.

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Speaker 3: It's horrible, it's brutal. You know, it's like termites in

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Speaker 3: your head. And still sometimes I have it, but I

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Speaker 3: go into the framework. See, so I know that if

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Speaker 3: I don't do something about it, which means the choice,

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Speaker 3: it's going to balloon into something for me that it's

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Speaker 3: really really toxic and difficult to get out of. For example,

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Speaker 3: if I go out for a walk and see nature,

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Speaker 3: even if I don't want, I don't wait to oh gee, wonderful,

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Speaker 3: I'm feeling like crap and I want to just go

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Speaker 3: in nature. Yeah, you know, no, I feel anxious. So

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Speaker 3: I'm like, okay, I need to go out in nature

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Speaker 3: because I know that's what's happening biologically is going to

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Speaker 3: help me get out of this mood. And then visually

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Speaker 3: I'm seeing nature. And also science says that if you're

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Speaker 3: seeing nature, that also improves your well being. So I'm

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Speaker 3: letting my body help me hedging myself towards possibly getting

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Speaker 3: out of it. Then maybe I will call a friend.

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Speaker 3: Then maybe i'll put music on as I'm working, I'll

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Speaker 3: read something inspiring. There's a bunch of things that I

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Speaker 3: do depending on how anxious I'm feeling so that I

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Speaker 3: can reset and that it actually works because I've tried it.

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Speaker 3: You know, I've experimented, So why not experiment on certain

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Speaker 3: things that the social scientists have researched that show that

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Speaker 3: improve your well being. And maybe it's not instant, but

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Speaker 3: over time, small action lead to big change because of

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Speaker 3: the neuroplasticity of our brain. Our brain can adapt or

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Speaker 3: brain can change, we can build new mindsets. And certainly

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Speaker 3: when you're in right now, if you're going through a

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Speaker 3: very difficult time, it does sound like almost like magic

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Speaker 3: or negating, but it actually works. It's not immediate. Losing

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Speaker 3: weight is not immediate. It takes you know, you have

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Speaker 3: to go and for a walk, you have to go

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Speaker 3: to a gym, you have to sweat a little bit.

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Speaker 3: But eventually you start to see some change. And it's

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Speaker 3: the same thing for our minds and our mindsets.

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Speaker 1: We're taking a quick break, but we'll be right back

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Speaker 1: with Happiness and Well Being Advocate Karen Guggenheim.

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Speaker 3: And we're back.

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Speaker 1: Karen, what you're talking about sounds to me like a bridge,

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Speaker 1: like you start one place and then you cross the

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Speaker 1: bridge to get somewhere else. Your ted talk was actually

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Speaker 1: titled the Bridge to happiness, but you say that the

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Speaker 1: bridge is really meaning. I'm wondering if you can share

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Speaker 1: more about that.

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Speaker 3: Happiness is like a practice. Okay, So when we're talking

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Speaker 3: about this, like the world happiness of it, or with

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Speaker 3: the experts that come there, it's a practice, right, It's

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Speaker 3: a daily practice that you do. It's not a pursuit

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Speaker 3: or a place that you're going because actually, happiness is

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Speaker 3: inside you, right, That's where it is. So you can

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Speaker 3: keep looking outside at a job, at a person, at

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Speaker 3: a car, at a house, at an outfit, at a trip,

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Speaker 3: and you can be happy in the moment. But for

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Speaker 3: sustainable happiness, you have to go inside and practice self care.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes it's self compassion, self love, self forgiveness, forgiveness of others,

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Speaker 3: work in your relationships, leave a relationship, leave a job,

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Speaker 3: All of these different things those compose you know your

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Speaker 3: own internal happiness and what matters to you. But the

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Speaker 3: bridge of meaning what you aspire or pursue, for example,

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Speaker 3: is purpose. And the beautiful thing about that is that

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Speaker 3: you don't even have to accomplish the purpose is the

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Speaker 3: pursuit that is a satisfying part because you're taking actions

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Speaker 3: that are aligned with your values. Right, So once you

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Speaker 3: know your purpose and what that is, then you connect

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Speaker 3: with values and actions that are align with those values.

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Speaker 3: That takes you on this kind of life journey. And

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Speaker 3: along the way you are feeling more fulfillment, more optimal

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Speaker 3: emotion and flourishing, and also building resilience for when life happens,

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Speaker 3: so you're able to build that muscle for when you

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Speaker 3: need it. Something else that is really important when I

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Speaker 3: talk about the bridge, The other two components of meaning

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Speaker 3: is coherence and significance. Right, So significance that could be

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Speaker 3: like where you attach also with your values. What is

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Speaker 3: important to you, what makes life worth living? That's significance

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Speaker 3: and coherence is that things make sense. Right, So we

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Speaker 3: need our lives to make sense to us. When you

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Speaker 3: experience a loss, a loss of a job, a divorce,

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Speaker 3: anything that ties into your identity, it's very disorienting for

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Speaker 3: people because it taps into coherence, and so that shakes

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Speaker 3: your meaning. And we are meaning making machines. We're social

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Speaker 3: animals and meaning making machines, and we're doing that all

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Speaker 3: the time. And I read something today and I thought

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Speaker 3: it was kind of inspiring, and it was like, there're

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Speaker 3: two prisoners right, looking up the jail cell out of

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Speaker 3: the window, and one sees mud and another one sees

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Speaker 3: a starry night.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 3: Both are true, both are reality based. But you have

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Speaker 3: a choice on which one you want to focus on.

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Speaker 3: We can process the other one take action on the

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Speaker 3: other things. But largely I think that we tend to

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Speaker 3: look at what we don't have or how we are

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Speaker 3: left out. And I'm not talking about systemic exclusion or

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Speaker 3: something like that, talking in everyday life and in every

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Speaker 3: day common relationships, where we focus on maybe what we

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Speaker 3: didn't get instead of all the things that we have

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Speaker 3: or did get. How can we contribute to somebody else

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Speaker 3: getting right? And another part of the work that we

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Speaker 3: do from our foundation and our nonprofit work with the world,

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Speaker 3: will being a policy form, is also to look at

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Speaker 3: how we can change systemic policies, you know, in the

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Speaker 3: workplace and in government and education so that we can

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Speaker 3: promote well being.

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Speaker 1: Will you give us an example of that, because I

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Speaker 1: find that so interesting, Like I'm not sure in America

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Speaker 1: our systems are in place for happiness.

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Speaker 3: I agree that our systems are not in place, and

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Speaker 3: that's why we fell out of the top twenty in

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Speaker 3: the World Happiness Report rankings for the first time, and

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Speaker 3: our youth is like sixty first in the world in happiness.

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Speaker 3: I think we have a lot of social comparison with

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Speaker 3: the social media, which is a place of everybody's having

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Speaker 3: a better time than you, everybody has it better than you.

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Speaker 3: So comparison is like a happiness killer because obviously with

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Speaker 3: filters and all these joyous things that you see and

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Speaker 3: you don't see the background or what it took to

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Speaker 3: get there. By the way we feel little, it makes

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Speaker 3: us feel small, It makes us feel real small. We

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Speaker 3: need to work on feelings of belonging and maybe redefining success,

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Speaker 3: maybe looking at policies that quantify success beyond money and GDP,

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Speaker 3: but look at, for example, inclusion and belonging and how

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Speaker 3: is the environment doing, and how do we create more

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Speaker 3: win wind scenarios. How do we teach our kids right?

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Speaker 3: We teach them like trigonometry and calculus, and that's amazing.

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Speaker 3: I've never used calculus in my professional life. I don't

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Speaker 3: know about you, ladies, but I would have loved the

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Speaker 3: classroom well being. And about me, how does my brain work?

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Speaker 3: What's a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset? How do

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Speaker 3: I change that. What are the guide rails around media?

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Speaker 3: Do I really want to go there? And so I

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Speaker 3: think that we need a shift in how we think

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Speaker 3: about success. If we're talking about the United States and

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Speaker 3: in American society.

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Speaker 2: I always come back to that concept of the internal

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Speaker 2: locus of control, which is what you mentioned earlier, this

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Speaker 2: idea of focusing on the things you are truly empowered

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Speaker 2: to do on your own. And I'm so heartened to

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Speaker 2: hear about the policies that could improve happiness for us

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Speaker 2: in America. But at the same time, I also just

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Speaker 2: know that no one is coming to save the day,

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Speaker 2: save us and fix everything. So I think the responsibility

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Speaker 2: is really on us to focus on what we can control.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely, it's both scary and empowering you think about it,

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Speaker 3: because we can do something about it. Yeah, right, But

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Speaker 3: if you're the one saying it's too hard or what

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Speaker 3: is one person going to do, let me tell you something.

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Speaker 3: You know, with this World Happiness Summit, I devoted my

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Speaker 3: life to it because I just felt it, just felt

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Speaker 3: it was the right thing to do, something that I

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Speaker 3: could do and I could control, right, And it created

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Speaker 3: a lot of meaning for me, and it has created

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Speaker 3: a lot of meaning for a lot of other people

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Speaker 3: and has helped so many people. I would have never

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Speaker 3: imagined that I could do something like that that would

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Speaker 3: have significance for others and help others at scale. Now,

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Speaker 3: is it going to curate everything? No, But if we

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Speaker 3: can all at least think that it could be possible

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Speaker 3: and start acting in ways of things that we can control,

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Speaker 3: then we start to move the needle, yeah, and have

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Speaker 3: a ripple effect.

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Speaker 2: It's time for another short break. But when we come back,

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Speaker 2: Karen Guggenheim tells us how to fight hopelessness and despair,

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Speaker 2: and we're back with happiness and well being Advocate Karen Guggenheim,

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Speaker 2: The hopelessness is the killer right Because I'll be honest,

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Speaker 2: I'm in a really good mental health space right now.

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Speaker 2: The past couple of months was a bit turbulent and

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Speaker 2: up and down for me in terms of my mood

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Speaker 2: and my just outlook on life and my emotions. I'm

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Speaker 2: in a place right now where I can really absorb

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Speaker 2: everything you're telling me, and I can absorb this framework.

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Speaker 2: But when you feel hopeless, it's really hard to do that.

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Speaker 2: It's really hard to stay consistent with this kind of framework.

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Speaker 2: So what are the keys to keeping this in mind

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Speaker 2: when you do feel that sense of despair or hopelessness.

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Speaker 3: The theme for the next timent actually is hope and community.

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Speaker 3: So hope is so powerful, it's so important, and I

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00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:32,680
Speaker 3: think that when you're feeling hopeless, it's like what you're saying,

437
00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:35,560
Speaker 3: you feel like you have no internal locus of control.

438
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:39,560
Speaker 3: So it's super freaking scary. You feel like out of control,

439
00:24:40,359 --> 00:24:44,720
Speaker 3: and that's really hard. And so first of all, we're okay,

440
00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:47,840
Speaker 3: Like in even if we're not feeling okay, we're okay.

441
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:49,920
Speaker 3: We're all different, we're all dealing with a lot. We

442
00:24:50,040 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 3: live in a society which is barrashed with information, right,

443
00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:56,000
Speaker 3: So it's a lot. It's a lot that's going on,

444
00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,639
Speaker 3: and it's a lot that's scary. And then, okay, the

445
00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:03,720
Speaker 3: other thing is do you feel more hopeless when you're

446
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:06,960
Speaker 3: listening to the news and when you have alerts coming everywhere?

447
00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:09,840
Speaker 3: I have zero alerts on my phone. I hardly look

448
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:14,440
Speaker 3: at the news because I stay just peripherally informed as

449
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:17,800
Speaker 3: to the large events. But I know how it impacts

450
00:25:17,840 --> 00:25:21,720
Speaker 3: me and not in a good way, and so what

451
00:25:21,800 --> 00:25:24,200
Speaker 3: I choose to do is use my energy to put

452
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:28,640
Speaker 3: it into the working solutions that then can help inform

453
00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:32,920
Speaker 3: people who are making policy decisions or business leaders or individuals.

454
00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:37,320
Speaker 3: So if for you there is a trigger that you know,

455
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:43,600
Speaker 3: don't do it. Don't go there. Protect yourself. So I'm

456
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:46,199
Speaker 3: very disciplined. I don't look at my phone first thing

457
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:49,080
Speaker 3: in the morning or last thing at night. So after

458
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:52,000
Speaker 3: nine pm, I don't check my phone because if I do,

459
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:56,159
Speaker 3: whether it's good or a bad message or whatever, I'll

460
00:25:56,160 --> 00:25:59,560
Speaker 3: think about it and ruminate while being thinking about it

461
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:01,640
Speaker 3: at night, and then if I don't sleep well, then

462
00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:03,560
Speaker 3: I'm going to be cranky the next morning. I'll have

463
00:26:03,640 --> 00:26:07,200
Speaker 3: less energy, and that's going to then multiplying to something

464
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:09,960
Speaker 3: that most probably is not going to be great for

465
00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:14,360
Speaker 3: me down the line. So those things are really important

466
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:17,560
Speaker 3: to see what are your triggers and what are your glimmers,

467
00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:20,000
Speaker 3: and then what makes you feel good. If being with

468
00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:23,280
Speaker 3: a friend or playing with your dog or whatever it

469
00:26:23,320 --> 00:26:26,680
Speaker 3: is that just gives you a bit of a nudge

470
00:26:27,119 --> 00:26:30,600
Speaker 3: in a direction that makes you feel better, then do

471
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:35,040
Speaker 3: more of that. Help. If you feel lonely, reach out

472
00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:38,600
Speaker 3: to somebody and off for help. We're hardwired to feel

473
00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:41,159
Speaker 3: better when we help other people, and so try some

474
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:43,320
Speaker 3: of that, Try some of these things and see what

475
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:47,439
Speaker 3: feels better for you, and understand that sometimes you just

476
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:50,359
Speaker 3: cannot feel well and that's okay, Karen.

477
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:53,800
Speaker 1: I love the word glimmer you said, triggers and glimmers.

478
00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:57,240
Speaker 1: The imagery of it is so bright and powerful to me,

479
00:26:57,320 --> 00:27:00,280
Speaker 1: at least when I think about a glimmer, I do

480
00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:04,199
Speaker 1: think about service. I also think about gratitude. And I

481
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:06,240
Speaker 1: know this is kind of like a played out thing

482
00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:09,320
Speaker 1: in our zeitgeist because we talk about gratitude a lot.

483
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,800
Speaker 1: Easy to talk about, sometimes harder to implement what actually

484
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:17,159
Speaker 1: happens in our brain when we experience gratitude.

485
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:20,400
Speaker 3: What's really interesting about gratitude is that it's very hard

486
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:22,400
Speaker 3: to be unhappy and be grateful at the same time.

487
00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:27,600
Speaker 3: It primes your brain towards the positive. So whether you

488
00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:29,680
Speaker 3: if you want, some people are like, oh, I don't

489
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:32,679
Speaker 3: like to do gratitude lists. Just say it in your brains,

490
00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:35,760
Speaker 3: in your mind as you're brushing your teeth, right, think

491
00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:38,560
Speaker 3: about things you're grateful for. Take that opportunity brushing teeth.

492
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:40,960
Speaker 3: I'm going to just say something that I'm grateful for.

493
00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:45,840
Speaker 3: And it's the act of being grateful that primes yourself

494
00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:50,840
Speaker 3: towards a positive feeling or seeing life in a different way.

495
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:56,719
Speaker 3: Also understand that feelings come and go, so you are

496
00:27:56,840 --> 00:28:01,359
Speaker 3: not your feelings. It's data. So if you see it like, Okay,

497
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,040
Speaker 3: my feelings are telling me something, am I hungry and

498
00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:07,119
Speaker 3: my lonely, break it down into like what it is

499
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:10,440
Speaker 3: that you're feeling, and then maybe then you can take well,

500
00:28:10,440 --> 00:28:13,080
Speaker 3: I didn't sleep or I forgot to get a hug,

501
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:17,280
Speaker 3: Like a hug is also an amazing, amazing boost. I love.

502
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:20,000
Speaker 1: I'm such a hugger, Karen. I totally agree with you.

503
00:28:20,040 --> 00:28:22,200
Speaker 1: If I hug somebody I care about, it feel better.

504
00:28:22,359 --> 00:28:25,440
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I just I breathe easier. I think

505
00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:26,920
Speaker 1: that's a glimmer, Karen.

506
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:28,520
Speaker 2: As we come to an end, I want to talk

507
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:31,240
Speaker 2: to you about relationships and how this factors into the

508
00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:34,919
Speaker 2: happiness equation, because you've said that, out of everything in

509
00:28:34,960 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 2: our lives, relationships have the biggest impact on our happiness.

510
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 3: Why. Like I said before, we're social creatures, and so

511
00:28:43,720 --> 00:28:47,120
Speaker 3: you know it's about people, it's about relationships, and we're

512
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:51,440
Speaker 3: not meant to be alone. You know, loneliness doesn't feel

513
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:54,160
Speaker 3: good now, difference from solitude and we all like our

514
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:57,040
Speaker 3: alone time, and that's what I'm talking about. But the

515
00:28:57,040 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 3: feeling of loneliness and isolation is very impactful. The Surgeon

516
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 3: General talks about that we're very people centric, so people

517
00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:07,360
Speaker 3: matter to us. So our relationships matter, whether it's a

518
00:29:07,360 --> 00:29:11,600
Speaker 3: personal relationships or professional relationships. This is kind of like

519
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,040
Speaker 3: why we do what we do, but it's like it's meaning.

520
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,880
Speaker 3: People are meaning. They create meaning in our lives. They

521
00:29:17,880 --> 00:29:20,560
Speaker 3: are the mirrors that reflect who we are. Many times,

522
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:23,640
Speaker 3: whether it's a friend or a loved one, it can

523
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:26,760
Speaker 3: be like going home, you know, in a relationship with

524
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:27,280
Speaker 3: a person.

525
00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:31,520
Speaker 1: Amazing, Karen, thank you so much for joining us today.

526
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 3: Absolutely my pleasure, Karen, this was awesome. It was so

527
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,239
Speaker 3: great to meet you. Thank you.

528
00:29:38,640 --> 00:29:42,479
Speaker 1: Karen Guggenheim is a happiness and well being advocate, author

529
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:46,120
Speaker 1: and founder of WAHASU, the organizing body behind the World

530
00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:50,720
Speaker 1: Happiness Summit. Her first book, Cultivating Happiness, is out next month.

531
00:29:55,360 --> 00:29:56,480
Speaker 3: That's it for today's show.

532
00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 2: Tomorrow, we're joined by the most awarded artists in the

533
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:02,920
Speaker 2: accadem Me of Country Music Awards history and three time

534
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:04,560
Speaker 2: Grammy winner Miranda Lambert.

535
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:08,120
Speaker 1: Thank you to our partners at Coligard, The one of

536
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Speaker 1: a kind way to screen for colon cancer in the

537
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Speaker 1: privacy and comfort of your own home. Talk to your

538
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Speaker 1: doctor or healthcare provider, or go to coliguard dot com

539
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Speaker 1: slash podcast to see if you are eligible to order online.

540
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Speaker 1: If you're forty five or older and at average risk,

541
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Speaker 1: ask your healthcare provider about screening for colon cancer with Coligard.

542
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Speaker 1: You can also request a collar guard prescription today at

543
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Speaker 1: coligard dot com slash podcast. Listen and follow the bright

544
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:38,800
Speaker 1: Side on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you

545
00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:39,800
Speaker 1: get your podcasts.

546
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:42,840
Speaker 2: I'm Simone Boye. You can find me at Simone Voice

547
00:30:42,880 --> 00:30:44,440
Speaker 2: on Instagram and TikTok.

548
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:47,560
Speaker 1: I'm Danielle Robe on Instagram and TikTok.

549
00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:48,840
Speaker 3: That's ro Ba.

550
00:30:49,080 --> 00:31:04,080
Speaker 2: Y see you tomorrow, folks. Keep looking on the bright side.