Speaker 1: When I right, y'all all across the USC Compton match
Speaker 1: Bank to l A from on the California the Valley,
Speaker 1: we represent that Kelly County. So if you're keeping it
Speaker 1: reil on your side of your town, you tune into
Speaker 1: Gangster Chronicles. The goals are gonna tell you how we go.
Speaker 1: If I line my nose will girl like Pinocchio. We're
Speaker 1: gonna tell you the truth and nothing but the truth.
Speaker 1: Gangster Chronicals. This is not your average show. You're now
Speaker 1: tuned into the Rail, m C A, Big James and
Speaker 1: Bix Fields the Streets. Hello, Welcome to the Gangster Chronicles podcast,
Speaker 1: the production of My Heart Radio and Black Effect Podcast Network.
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Speaker 1: the Gangster Chronicles for my Apple users, hit the Purple
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Speaker 1: start rating the comment. We like to welcome you to
Speaker 1: another episode of Against the Chronicles podcast. And I'm with
Speaker 1: my Dog and we got our special guests and our
Speaker 1: special guest hosts taking m C Gates place while eight
Speaker 1: is out there doing this thistle out there making his money.
Speaker 1: Big Court from the Holding Court Podcast, What's Happening court.
Speaker 1: What's going on? Roster lou Fella, Salute the Big Jason
Speaker 1: lout the Big Still thank you for having me to
Speaker 1: m C. A salute to O G. M C eight
Speaker 1: as well for show for show for show. You know,
Speaker 1: we were having some discussions. You know, we always talk
Speaker 1: on our own time about everything, and there seems to
Speaker 1: be a problem with drug uses, a pervasive problem with
Speaker 1: drug using. The hip hop coach gets an urban coaching period. Um,
Speaker 1: I'm a product of the seven. You know. It's born
Speaker 1: in the seventies, born in seventy um, raised in the eighties.
Speaker 1: And I remember there was a time to where you
Speaker 1: didn't want to be labeled as a thing. That was
Speaker 1: the most embarrassing thing ever. You didn't want to be
Speaker 1: called no smoker. You didn't want to have nothing to
Speaker 1: do with no drugs. You remember. At one time that
Speaker 1: was a big part of the thing. Even the use it.
Speaker 1: They would tell you like crackers wack, we're not working
Speaker 1: with that. You know, you don't want to be no thing.
Speaker 1: You're smoker. That was the worst thing you can call
Speaker 1: the person. But now it's just invaded the whole cooture.
Speaker 1: You've got these guys. They sound like they fall to
Speaker 1: sleep on their tracks. Man, they do. You know, it's
Speaker 1: opiates epidemic in this country, you know, as strong opiate epidemic.
Speaker 1: You know, it's a heroin the epidemic. And um, I
Speaker 1: know in the New Orleans, for example, heroin has been
Speaker 1: the main drug since as far back as I can remember.
Speaker 1: Everybody and everybody in New Orleans was on that. Girl.
Speaker 1: I think they've been that with that for a long time.
Speaker 1: And then you had used them with the lean movement,
Speaker 1: all of us connected back to opious. Yeah, you know that.
Speaker 1: The strange thing too, is still like you said, I'm
Speaker 1: born in the seventies, raised in the eighties. Um, you
Speaker 1: know our parents. You know, at least my mom and
Speaker 1: her her reference of drug to stay away from was
Speaker 1: heron you know what I'm saying, from the Vietna, from Vietnam,
Speaker 1: from the city these in the fifties and ships like that.
Speaker 1: So cocaine was a uh, you know, there was a
Speaker 1: party drug. There's a rich people drug. So you could
Speaker 1: see how people my mother's age and even Big J
Speaker 1: you know, their generation got broadsided by crack because they
Speaker 1: didn't know what that was. They didn't know what it
Speaker 1: was gonna be you know what I'm saying. Um, So
Speaker 1: that's why I could never understand why, you know, my
Speaker 1: generation or even younger would even touch some of these
Speaker 1: hard drugs, you know, because we have reference points of
Speaker 1: what it is, cocaine and cracking all of that. And
Speaker 1: I remember, um, you know, I won't say no names,
Speaker 1: but you know, we all know street people. But I
Speaker 1: remember a couple of my street cats that I that
Speaker 1: I that I know, and I would ask them, I would,
Speaker 1: I would say, bro, how y'all still making money? Like
Speaker 1: I ain't seen a crackhead since the nineties, really, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. And and and the nigga told me,
Speaker 1: he said, ship, he said, these motherfucker's ridding around on
Speaker 1: these twenty sixes and and and and you know what
Speaker 1: I mean like them? Them is them? Is the customers
Speaker 1: right there. And I was blown away when he said.
Speaker 1: I was like, damn for really, Like, you know, so
Speaker 1: I don't know what it's uh, you know, I don't know, bro,
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know it is the level of
Speaker 1: mental illness. I think we're not talking about the mental
Speaker 1: illness part of it as well. And and of course
Speaker 1: we know what the systemic part of it is too
Speaker 1: as well, you know what I mean. I think we're
Speaker 1: still uh you know, dealing with the the ripple effects
Speaker 1: of crack cocaine as well, because you know that ship
Speaker 1: had tentacles. I mean, you got you know, families, you
Speaker 1: know that we're broken mandatory minimums. You got niggas just
Speaker 1: coming home, you know what I mean, from from them
Speaker 1: Drake Coney and sentences and ships or fragmented the family.
Speaker 1: So it's so many, it's layers. There's so many layers
Speaker 1: to the issues that we see now. And like you said,
Speaker 1: it's cool to be a thing. I remember, Uh one
Speaker 1: of my little nephews partners, he's talking about he about
Speaker 1: to go bust ahead, you know what I mean. And
Speaker 1: I'm thinking to myself, like ship they give you. You're
Speaker 1: the junkie, like he on everything. He don't pe it
Speaker 1: was he gonna lean he up, he's down, he's crazy, depressed,
Speaker 1: he's happy like they on so much ship, bro, And
Speaker 1: that's just the culture. Unfortunately, they celebrate that ship. Watching
Speaker 1: my parents, their friends. They was on the Molly's and
Speaker 1: all that ship. The marijuana, uh, the PCP, you know,
Speaker 1: that's that was the drug back then, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. In the seventies, every ten years, every year
Speaker 1: people find different ship, different ways to get high, and
Speaker 1: all it did is elevating because marijuana didn't work no more.
Speaker 1: The mollys didn't work no more. Now you got uh
Speaker 1: the lean, Now you got the uh what's the them
Speaker 1: new pills? I took some of the more fockers before
Speaker 1: the who there's those ecstasy? Yeah, Exstacy, I popped. I
Speaker 1: popped like Poe Exstacy sitting down on my knees is
Speaker 1: white levies gambling And why I'm shooting one of my
Speaker 1: little honeys because I was so fucked up. And but
Speaker 1: our kids today, the regular ship, the ship that they
Speaker 1: was on back then, they don't do it no more.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, I don't get you high
Speaker 1: no more. So people are looking for what's gonna anticipate
Speaker 1: these situations opposed to mellow them out or whatever, because
Speaker 1: just like you said, Noring, they're doing different drugs. If
Speaker 1: they're doing lean and drinking alcohol right behind it and
Speaker 1: smoking weeds, so they're doing four different types of drugs
Speaker 1: only one time just to get that that high. And
Speaker 1: the tolerance level is so whack these days. They can
Speaker 1: do it all day, man, they can. They can smoke weed.
Speaker 1: I was straight, just keep umping weeds and and some
Speaker 1: of them don't even be hind. Yeah, it just gotten worser,
Speaker 1: that's all it is. They don't. And the weed these
Speaker 1: days is crazy, you know what I mean when you're
Speaker 1: talking about the th C in it and just you
Speaker 1: know how, I'm like, damn, how how are you trying
Speaker 1: to beat? You know? Well, you know the thing it
Speaker 1: was core back in our days. I think, um, if
Speaker 1: you smoke some good old a good grade of reef,
Speaker 1: you know, like they have. Monkey Paul had different, you
Speaker 1: know strings he was running maybe about thirty thirty five
Speaker 1: percent t C. Right, you know, you're smoking joint. You
Speaker 1: get the giggles, you get the monks. But that's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. That was some good weed back then. Now
Speaker 1: the arabage is kind of like fifty four. I've seen
Speaker 1: fifty six, I've seen sixty, and it's like, how high
Speaker 1: do you want to be in the thing? It was
Speaker 1: these What's happening now is these kids are smoking so
Speaker 1: much weed that it's like it's becoming a thing to
Speaker 1: where they gotta smoke more than you gotta. They gotta
Speaker 1: damn the smoking ounce just to get that same mind
Speaker 1: instead of to where it used to be a weekend thing.
Speaker 1: You may smoke Friday and Saturday, but you know, Sunday
Speaker 1: through Thursday, whatever, Sunday, you go to church with him
Speaker 1: and you're business the rest of the week. And it
Speaker 1: was just a weekend thing. Now it's a daily thing.
Speaker 1: You got people smoking joints back to back to back
Speaker 1: to back to back, and it's like they lose the
Speaker 1: backs of it and it's not so much weed. And
Speaker 1: I'm worried about this. This opiates. Man, there's these opiates man, um,
Speaker 1: you know, opious. They can do a number of things.
Speaker 1: James talked about these guys mixing that lean with the
Speaker 1: you know, the promethezine with the alcohol you can leave
Speaker 1: to your loans, collapsing um. You know, my boy from
Speaker 1: second to None he lost his brother like that. Man,
Speaker 1: he just you know, one day could lapse. Man, he
Speaker 1: couldn't breathe and he didn't make it to the hospital.
Speaker 1: He died passed away from it. Yeah, I mean, let's explore,
Speaker 1: like what's the root of that, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: Like like what's the root of it? And and and
Speaker 1: then not only the root of it, the influence. You know,
Speaker 1: the rappers, they they influenced that. The music sets the
Speaker 1: training for the drug of the day, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. When when Chronic came out, everybody was trying
Speaker 1: to get that good weed. It was about trying to
Speaker 1: get the chronic, you know what I mean. And then
Speaker 1: you know, I remember doing the late nineties, early two thousand's,
Speaker 1: of course with the explosion of you know up north,
Speaker 1: the Northern Cali, you know, HiFi movement. It was all
Speaker 1: about them thistles. It was all about that ecstasy. And
Speaker 1: then then the Moley and all of that. And then
Speaker 1: of course you had Houston, you know with the screwed
Speaker 1: up ship, you know, with the lean. They've they've been
Speaker 1: doing the lean forever, you know what I'm saying with
Speaker 1: the drink. But I'm gonna tell you something, No, Court,
Speaker 1: it just wasn't in Texas they popularized it, right they
Speaker 1: the mainstream. But I know Philly, Ohio, and I'm pretty
Speaker 1: sure Beckham, James every it was on that on that
Speaker 1: leaning real heavy too. That Now that ain't the West
Speaker 1: Coast thing. I never heard of it out on the
Speaker 1: West coast, just really located, just really in Houston. To
Speaker 1: be very honest with you, but to be honest with you,
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna be real court. I had homeboys in Philly,
Speaker 1: my homeboys in Pittsburgh, had homeboys in Ohio. It was
Speaker 1: a thing. Because you have to remember, and I do
Speaker 1: think that some of this stuff is kind of just
Speaker 1: it's two coincident in it because I remember I had
Speaker 1: asked me real bad coming up right, And remember my
Speaker 1: mom would take me to the hospital in at one time.
Speaker 1: You know, if I had a code was congested, they
Speaker 1: would give her a big two leader for to permit
Speaker 1: the zaine. Mm hmm, it will be a two leader.
Speaker 1: And I remember she give me a teaspoon. Now he
Speaker 1: just go to sleep and will knock me right out.
Speaker 1: But the whole leader stayed up there. It might still
Speaker 1: be sitting up in their medicine cabinet. It was there.
Speaker 1: You know, I ain't gonna lie bro during COVID, I
Speaker 1: called COVID. I had COVID. You know about two years ago.
Speaker 1: I had a super bad cough and and the doctor
Speaker 1: prescribed me that that that ship right. I can see
Speaker 1: the appeal of it because I slept good, my nigga,
Speaker 1: I ain't gonna lie. I slept good as ship right,
Speaker 1: but it robbed me of my day. I can't see
Speaker 1: how niggas functioning on it because I didn't want to
Speaker 1: do ship like. I was actually like like a heroin
Speaker 1: at it like I was doze and had that dophine.
Speaker 1: Now I'll be watching TV and next thing I know,
Speaker 1: I'm not off and ship like. I don't see how
Speaker 1: they how they functioned on it, you know. And then
Speaker 1: I don't think they realized really the effects of it,
Speaker 1: like you said with the kidneys and even you can
Speaker 1: always tell when these little niggas is on this because
Speaker 1: you can't use the bathroom, they get the gut. That
Speaker 1: was the thing with man, and you know literally that
Speaker 1: means you full of ship because you can't. You can't,
Speaker 1: you can't move your boss, you can't overs if you're
Speaker 1: trying to. It's been people, man. I've heard of people. Man,
Speaker 1: the famous people have to go get the surgery because
Speaker 1: they they literally couldn't shipp The gotta go in there
Speaker 1: and kind of just buy, yeah, it's open to get
Speaker 1: get rid of all the feces and stuff, because you know,
Speaker 1: ahead can tell it. You can go like that, Yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure, for sure. But I mean, let's explore, man,
Speaker 1: what you think the the like I said, the root
Speaker 1: of this. Why why you want to get so high?
Speaker 1: Why are they so you know, fascinated with with the
Speaker 1: with with the drug culture. Well, we got two different
Speaker 1: dynamics going on court. The first one is life imitating art.
Speaker 1: You know, people see their favorite artists doing stuff in
Speaker 1: the biggest major thing about his undiagnosed depression, self medication.
Speaker 1: A lot of people are depressed, a lot of people
Speaker 1: having diagnosed depressed, a lot of people don't believe in depression.
Speaker 1: A lot of people don't believe. And you want to
Speaker 1: go get therapy and things like that. They that's I
Speaker 1: suffered from depression off and known probably for most of
Speaker 1: my life, which I believe was hereditary, probably up until
Speaker 1: you know, more recent years. But yeah, that'shi, it real,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. You just gotta do your
Speaker 1: work and understand what your triggers are and like you said,
Speaker 1: talk to somebody. That ship is ready. There's depression. We
Speaker 1: live in the generation man to where people look at um,
Speaker 1: you know, expressing your feelings. Some people, especially in our community,
Speaker 1: They look at expressing your feelings as being soft. So
Speaker 1: a lot of people self medicate. They smoke weed, they
Speaker 1: drink alcohol. Um. You know, you think if you think
Speaker 1: about the pattern in the hood all day, you know,
Speaker 1: we don't see their man. The morning. They gonna get
Speaker 1: them a couple of grams. They stopped the spense for
Speaker 1: get them a couple of grams. They go to store
Speaker 1: and get them a til pact. They sit around and
Speaker 1: drink smoke, will drink smoke. Then they may go up
Speaker 1: with their homeboys. Their homeboys got a couple of pills.
Speaker 1: Next thing you know, they're popping the motherfucker's. And they're
Speaker 1: not just taking these pills. They're not just taking drinking
Speaker 1: them with a glass of water. No, all these motherfucker's
Speaker 1: showing these pills, they courting them because each peel, like,
Speaker 1: let's say you get a Tim Millergraham oxycotton, right, that
Speaker 1: Tim Millergraham oxycotton is built to release over six hours.
Speaker 1: It's not built to go on your bloodstream all thet once.
Speaker 1: So when you get the showing them motherfucker's and snorting them,
Speaker 1: you're taking all of that at once, man, And what
Speaker 1: it doesn't overloads your senses almost in where you don't
Speaker 1: know what the fun is want. Like you said, you're
Speaker 1: nodding off and you don't give a funk about nothing.
Speaker 1: That's why you have so many instances of motherfucker's just
Speaker 1: popping the motherfucker just for no reason. Pretty much. You know,
Speaker 1: motherucker's say something power because you are desensitized to what's
Speaker 1: going on around you. And so we have a lot
Speaker 1: of people suffering from the addiction and not pray healing
Speaker 1: and help for anybody stuck on heroin. I've had heroin
Speaker 1: addicts in my family. It's almost impossible. I've seen people
Speaker 1: get off crack. I've seen people get off cocaine. I've
Speaker 1: seen people start I've seen people put weed down easy, right.
Speaker 1: But that heroin, it's all It's a strong monkey on
Speaker 1: your back. Man. It's almost impossible to leave because by
Speaker 1: the time they started getting sick. Man, I had a cousin.
Speaker 1: It was on that ship, right and they was going
Speaker 1: through what man, I'm talking about, defecating on themselves, man,
Speaker 1: advocating on themselves. The sweats. It's almost like they begged
Speaker 1: you for that stuff. I had a cousin, Man, they
Speaker 1: literally tied her up when they got her queen, like
Speaker 1: literally her daddy got on the room, tied her up,
Speaker 1: and left friend there. He would come in their feather
Speaker 1: suit and he did this for about six months, and
Speaker 1: eventually she started getting normal. And but what are he
Speaker 1: was doing? He would give her a little doses a ship, right,
Speaker 1: like little doses are like um, like what was that ship?
Speaker 1: He would give her on like taling all threes, like
Speaker 1: lower dose medicine because you know, you could die on
Speaker 1: that ship. M you get down on that ship. So
Speaker 1: he would cut like a town and all three up
Speaker 1: the four's and feed her little pieces of it and
Speaker 1: ship like that, so she would get the little thing,
Speaker 1: you know, so she could relax a little bit. But
Speaker 1: then eventually he just like cut her off cold turkey
Speaker 1: and she got clean. Man, But it took her. Once
Speaker 1: he got her like that, then he put her in
Speaker 1: the rehab because he did the rehab ship before, and
Speaker 1: he was like, funk this ship. I'm not going to
Speaker 1: go spend another fifteen thousand dollars for your ass to
Speaker 1: come out and be cool. And then they want to
Speaker 1: replace that ship with some other medicine. Because now I
Speaker 1: was a little bit better because they have medicine like
Speaker 1: my cousin back then, she's on the medicine. Now she
Speaker 1: takes a peel I think once a day. She takes
Speaker 1: a peal once a day, and she's been clean, works
Speaker 1: a job. You wouldn't You wouldn't know her. I saw
Speaker 1: when I was back at the crib and it was
Speaker 1: kind of like, hey, there, you finally back to us.
Speaker 1: I'm so proud of you. She's able to hold a
Speaker 1: job now, She's probably had to take that medicine for
Speaker 1: the rest of her life. But Dog, it's better than
Speaker 1: the alternative. But it makes me think sometimes it's like, okay,
Speaker 1: you were place one drug with another. Somebody's still getting paid.
Speaker 1: How does this ship make it to the streets, bro,
Speaker 1: Because we ain't got no you know, they got pelle
Speaker 1: princes in the creative stuff like that, But I don't
Speaker 1: think no chemists in the hood like that that's able
Speaker 1: to figure off the pharmacology of Opius. You feel what
Speaker 1: I'm saying, the manufacturing gills that ship is coming from somewhere, dog,
Speaker 1: and it's coming from the inside. And I'm gonna tell
Speaker 1: you another thing too, bro, that fat and all it's
Speaker 1: really taking motherfucker's out. I lost one of my little lost,
Speaker 1: one of my cousin lost his son. You know, the
Speaker 1: rest in peace, little DJ. But he wasn't on ship. Dog.
Speaker 1: He just got him a job though. He just got
Speaker 1: a job of the city. You know how to her
Speaker 1: his court, we both met West boys. You get a
Speaker 1: job with the city, you're making that forty fifty run up.
Speaker 1: You can run a four bedroom house for eight hundred
Speaker 1: dollars a month, and that motherfucker you're doing good, you know.
Speaker 1: So his back was hurt, real bad. He went over
Speaker 1: one of his home plays house and said, hey, my
Speaker 1: back is killing me. Oh dog, got some for that.
Speaker 1: He took that dog, laid on with his little baby
Speaker 1: on his cheff dog. He just never woke up because
Speaker 1: it was fitting on. I just got our knee surgery dog.
Speaker 1: And when I was in knee surgery, it was funny
Speaker 1: because you wake up all you remember, you don't remember nothing,
Speaker 1: You just remember just just kind of just passing out right,
Speaker 1: and you wake up and your knee in the first
Speaker 1: worst pain in the world. And they got this ice
Speaker 1: thing on your knee is properly like, oh, ship, what
Speaker 1: the fund is going on? So I hear the nurse
Speaker 1: one C C f cc affetting all you know, and
Speaker 1: she ship that thing. Once she hit that thing dog
Speaker 1: whatever it was, she didn't shake it into that thing.
Speaker 1: I swear I felt the warmthons come up with my
Speaker 1: body almost instantly. Nat wasn't hurt, and she told me,
Speaker 1: she said, yeah, you're feeling good now, but tomorrow there's
Speaker 1: some time to burl that knat pain heels gonna come back.
Speaker 1: That's why they tell you to get your pain medication
Speaker 1: and ship before you even go home, so that ship
Speaker 1: is there. And she was just think. I was in
Speaker 1: the middle of doing my therapy. Look shine, he's like
Speaker 1: he been on my leg. All of a sudden that
Speaker 1: ain't came back. And I was like, oh, Ship, you've
Speaker 1: been in the two hard you've been in the to her,
Speaker 1: she said, did you take your pain medicine? No? They
Speaker 1: kept asking me, Mrs Still, why are you not taking
Speaker 1: the pain mess And I'm looking at these white folks
Speaker 1: like why are you not taking your main pain medicine.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you're not turning me into a JUNKI and
Speaker 1: this fucking if I don't have to take him my taking.
Speaker 1: But then what I realized was. In order for me
Speaker 1: to do my therapy right, I had to take a
Speaker 1: mess subscribe. And that's what I did. I took a
Speaker 1: mess subscribe. I took it nothing like. I don't have
Speaker 1: no pain now. I don't funk with the motherfucker's the
Speaker 1: motherfucker's in the toilet because I'm a responsible parent. Me no,
Speaker 1: when I got teenagers in the house, I'm not one
Speaker 1: of them. Parents like my Thank God, my kids don't
Speaker 1: do no dope. But teenagers like the experiment. They're curious.
Speaker 1: They may go in that medical cabinessty ship Pomp's got
Speaker 1: some mons cottle. I'm gonna trap one of these motherfucker.
Speaker 1: It might be the one ship to send them over
Speaker 1: the eggs dog. I ain't going out like that. But
Speaker 1: I think we got a lot of mental illness in
Speaker 1: our community, bro. We have its in our community, and
Speaker 1: it's um and it's to the point, bro, to where
Speaker 1: we don't we don't seek treatment because we want to
Speaker 1: keep getting out using. When people getting clean, it's because
Speaker 1: they want to. I had a brother that did crack.
Speaker 1: He would tell you. I had a brother that did
Speaker 1: cracked for him five years straight, and he told me, said, man,
Speaker 1: I smoked thirty five hundred dollars worth ship every day,
Speaker 1: and he made his way to go get that money.
Speaker 1: He figured out one day he tried to do everything.
Speaker 1: My mom's would try to let him in the house. Man.
Speaker 1: You know, she come back on TV, gone rings going,
Speaker 1: all kinds of ship and he'd be sitting up for
Speaker 1: that motherfucker, like and come back in any of them,
Speaker 1: or what's going on, Mama, billy? Where's my stuff at? Like,
Speaker 1: where's all my stuff? I don't know. Somebody must have
Speaker 1: broken the crib and eventually, you know, any time a
Speaker 1: mother gets tired of you and kicked her son off
Speaker 1: the crib, they gotta be serious, though, Yeah, we gotta worship.
Speaker 1: That's like a quarterbreak almost, you know that drum like
Speaker 1: that's like that's like but yeah, but but I think
Speaker 1: to your point, man, like when you think about you know,
Speaker 1: a lot of this ship is systemic too. You know,
Speaker 1: it's like they give us the tools to to to
Speaker 1: destroy ourselves. You know what I'm saying, Because you know
Speaker 1: it's so many, it's so many layers to it. You know,
Speaker 1: we're already dealing with depression, were already dealing with you know, uh,
Speaker 1: mental illness, we're dealing with health issues, we're dealing with
Speaker 1: you know, hopelessness. That that adds to it too, because
Speaker 1: you know there's so many struggles and like that, think
Speaker 1: about it. It's still liquor stores. Like you go to
Speaker 1: the hood, you know, Like I live in the valley,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. So when I'm in Calabasas,
Speaker 1: I don't see liquor stores like that. Like I literally
Speaker 1: kind of go look for one, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: But you you go to l a man, the motherfucker's
Speaker 1: is all over. It's like you can find anything you want,
Speaker 1: but but you can't find but it's hard to like
Speaker 1: James said, you know, but you can't get health insurance.
Speaker 1: You know, you can't find you know, a mentor, you
Speaker 1: can't get into college. You can get into jail easier
Speaker 1: than you can get into college, you know what i mean.
Speaker 1: Like there's not there's not useful resources around you, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. But you can get anything you want,
Speaker 1: any drug you want, fitting all oxy thistles, wet, whatever
Speaker 1: you want. It's out there for you to indulge in.
Speaker 1: So a lot of that ship is the stomach bro
Speaker 1: A lot of a lot of ships start off recreation
Speaker 1: on a lot of people get hired just because they're
Speaker 1: hanging out. You know, I never did marijuana. I've never
Speaker 1: seen the reason to do that. Um, when when the
Speaker 1: promos came out, everybody homies passing joints. You know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying, doing promos happen to motherfucker's that was hanging
Speaker 1: around only did it because the homies was doing it.
Speaker 1: Everybody was not junkies. But you became a junkie after
Speaker 1: when you're the only motherfucker's still doing great cocaine, you're
Speaker 1: a junkie. You know what I'm saying. Harolin dog food
Speaker 1: was totally different because it fed and and and attacks
Speaker 1: you from the inside, right, Not no mind ship that
Speaker 1: cocaine was totally different. Motherfucker's was robbing and stealing and
Speaker 1: doing all other kinds of ship for different trugs. But
Speaker 1: the kids of the day didn't have to get down
Speaker 1: like in in my days. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: They're doing ship just because the next person is doing it.
Speaker 1: Like you said, they're listening to uh Little Wayne rapping
Speaker 1: about lane or or what you call them talking about percocets.
Speaker 1: So the mind tells them, Man, I'm gonna go try
Speaker 1: that ship out, So we'll start off just a taste tester.
Speaker 1: When they start liking it, everybody in the hood wants
Speaker 1: to hang out and be feeling good, especially when they
Speaker 1: go to park these yet the nightclubs, everybody already ready
Speaker 1: they pop the theles, they're getting that motherfucker what they're doing.
Speaker 1: They're drinking their ass off. It intensified. They hide, so
Speaker 1: they started getting used to it. It becomes a pattern.
Speaker 1: I gotta this is how I gotta do it. So
Speaker 1: you know, if if I walked around the who to
Speaker 1: say everybody is doing drug got a mental problem? I'd
Speaker 1: be crazy and the motherfucker No, we're just doing ship
Speaker 1: just because everybody else is doing it now, and I'm
Speaker 1: doing it because it makes me feel good. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: some people in the hood that that's going through a
Speaker 1: whole bunch of ship and doing drugs is a way
Speaker 1: of forgetting you know what I'm saying, like alcohol, you're
Speaker 1: the worstest motherfucking drug out there. Theory because m hm,
Speaker 1: when I when I put myself in situations and did
Speaker 1: certain things, I got drunk so I didn't have to
Speaker 1: think about it. But guess what, when you wake up
Speaker 1: that next day, you're gonna wake up with a hangover,
Speaker 1: but you still gonna remember the ship you did and
Speaker 1: I funked up you was, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So alcohol was one of the worstest motherfucking things out there.
Speaker 1: But these kids they're doing it. All these niggas out
Speaker 1: here today don't give a fuck. So it's just a
Speaker 1: word of mouth. Let's try this, and everybody is uh
Speaker 1: experimenting with whatever it's new today. Yeah, that's that's crazy
Speaker 1: because you know, I never subscribed to that. And I
Speaker 1: know exactly what you mean, James, because you know, growing up,
Speaker 1: you know, all my friends drank smoke weed. You know,
Speaker 1: that was what it was back then. Uh in case
Speaker 1: you know wet you know that was the wed daddy,
Speaker 1: the button nket that was a thing in the nineties. Um.
Speaker 1: But you know, I think probably because I grew up
Speaker 1: in a household with function and alcoholics, you know, and
Speaker 1: I kind of grew up around drugs like you know,
Speaker 1: I grew up in the eighties, so you know, I
Speaker 1: remember finding you know, when my mother and her friends
Speaker 1: and my stepfather would be partying. You know what I'm
Speaker 1: on the weekend. I remember finding them trades up under
Speaker 1: the couch with the residue. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: I used to be drawn in the residute. I didn't
Speaker 1: know what it was, you know what I'm saying. And
Speaker 1: so but you know, I remember my people being inebriated,
Speaker 1: and I don't know that just that ship just turned
Speaker 1: me off, bro Like, I never wanted to be around it.
Speaker 1: I never did it. My friends did it, but you know,
Speaker 1: I never followed, you know what I'm saying. Like, and
Speaker 1: and it could be just because I've seen it in
Speaker 1: my household, you know. But you're right though, a lot
Speaker 1: of people fall victim to just being followers and and
Speaker 1: just trying to you know, fit in, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, And they funk around and try something, and
Speaker 1: it takes some years to untry it, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean exactly. And and the thing it was, Court
Speaker 1: I went through my period, man, because being a product
Speaker 1: of Midwest, some stuff was just then out of bordom.
Speaker 1: You're out of sheer boredom. You know. The thing is,
Speaker 1: because you know, being in the Midwest and the small towns,
Speaker 1: you don't already vote on everything that's walking around there
Speaker 1: already and you don't know and everything, and then the
Speaker 1: thing it was somebody got a kick back, they got liquor,
Speaker 1: they got beer, over the wind up getting front. I
Speaker 1: went through a period that went to one summer dog
Speaker 1: where I blacked out twice, and that's when I realized
Speaker 1: I didn't. That's when I kind of slowed down, but
Speaker 1: I kept going kind of into my arm early twenties,
Speaker 1: and then I remember my little boy came to me
Speaker 1: one day and said, I want to drink beer too,
Speaker 1: And I just looked at the way he looked at me.
Speaker 1: I said, damn, did my son see me as a
Speaker 1: drunk motherfucker woving around here? And my wife would kind
Speaker 1: of making choice. It's easy to go be that for this,
Speaker 1: and I just left the ship alone. I just stopped.
Speaker 1: I didn't go to know where the draws or nothing.
Speaker 1: I just left alone. That was after because after year,
Speaker 1: it was still early for you, like like me, before school.
Speaker 1: Fuck school. We stopped that, just stove and got a
Speaker 1: court of all English, and we drunk beer all the
Speaker 1: way to school. Coming from school, when the sun going down,
Speaker 1: we switched from liquor to bumpy face. Were drank and
Speaker 1: by Jen we we were drinking. That was my way
Speaker 1: of coping with everything that was going on the day.
Speaker 1: So when nighttime hit down, I'm already ready half for
Speaker 1: my motherfucking Shenanigans. Was because I was already drunk, feeling good,
Speaker 1: and ready to go fuck it, you see what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: But I was able to cope with with what was
Speaker 1: going on around me for that day. I just didn't
Speaker 1: do the weed. Everybody else was drinking with me from
Speaker 1: from from morning tonight on there to to hard liquor.
Speaker 1: They smoked weed. I didn't. And then say the early
Speaker 1: part of the eighties that that premo, Yeah, we had
Speaker 1: the Vermont Drive in ten cars and everybody is going
Speaker 1: back and forth back and forth to East Car smoking
Speaker 1: premos and drinking. But when we had that motherfucking fighting there,
Speaker 1: everybody looked like they was paranoid to know what the
Speaker 1: fun to do. And I've seen the best of the
Speaker 1: best loss even lost, Like what the funk am I doing?
Speaker 1: Didn't know what to do? So man, that promo should
Speaker 1: smell so terrible. Man, my aunt, you know my first
Speaker 1: introduction in the promo um in the eighties. You know,
Speaker 1: my my aunt used to smoke weed. I used to
Speaker 1: like the smell of weed when I was a kid,
Speaker 1: you know, I always loved the smell of it. And
Speaker 1: my aunt would be smoking and I used to be like, Damn,
Speaker 1: her weed smell funny, Like that was stronger ship. I
Speaker 1: used to be like, why her ship smell like that?
Speaker 1: You know it was. It wasn't until you know, I
Speaker 1: got a little bit older where it was like damn,
Speaker 1: aunt was on their mold and she was that with
Speaker 1: that when before she started doing most like my uncle's
Speaker 1: they were they were doing the blow, they were sniffing
Speaker 1: the ship. Yeah, and and once that didn't funk with
Speaker 1: him no more, they went to the next thing. Now
Speaker 1: they're basing now basically you know, now they're doing different ships.
Speaker 1: It's just it intensified once you get it in your
Speaker 1: system and you just want more and you want a
Speaker 1: better effect. You want to you want to get you
Speaker 1: want to be fucked up. So what they're doing, man,
Speaker 1: is the why? Man, I just keep going. But like
Speaker 1: James me, knowing your story, I totally understand. You know again,
Speaker 1: you know why you would be you know, indulge in
Speaker 1: having to uh you know, endure and go through all
Speaker 1: the ship you was dealing with you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: But but then you know what for for people that's
Speaker 1: dealing with that, like what's the what's the alternative? What?
Speaker 1: What are the alternatives? You know, I know you didn't
Speaker 1: really have them in that day, James, or at least
Speaker 1: you didn't know that you had them. But nowadays with
Speaker 1: the Internet and in so much information at our disposal,
Speaker 1: with our fingertips, like what what is the alternative? Even
Speaker 1: though even though I did a lot of alcohol, I
Speaker 1: didn't choose to do marijuana smoke weed like they did
Speaker 1: on the daily. Um, you know, a lot of cats
Speaker 1: that hung with us didn't do either one. But in
Speaker 1: due time they're gonna be like everybody funked up looking
Speaker 1: like they're having a good time. Now they want to
Speaker 1: try it. It's just you know, we you hang with
Speaker 1: people now they want to do the ship that they
Speaker 1: see in and that's all they did. Man, if you
Speaker 1: stick to your guns, ain't doing drugs. Likely forward one
Speaker 1: of the homies. He was one of the biggest cats
Speaker 1: in the neighborhood. Never went to prison. Damn, Why is
Speaker 1: this nigga so swollen? And they never met to prison
Speaker 1: because he was a healthy. Motherfucker. He didn't do alcohol,
Speaker 1: he didn't do we he didn't put that ship in
Speaker 1: his body. M see what I'm saying. So it's the
Speaker 1: choices that we made at that time doing it. Just
Speaker 1: like the cast of the day, it's the choices that
Speaker 1: they're making the people that they're hanging around bad influence.
Speaker 1: So we don't have to. Yeah, but you see everybody
Speaker 1: else doing something, so it's like fuck it, and everybody
Speaker 1: is trying to cope and deal with something in their life.
Speaker 1: The next person might be telling them, man, this is
Speaker 1: what I do because I told them, mother nig I get.
Speaker 1: I don't give a funk who I shoot. I'm cool.
Speaker 1: Let me say something real quick to me. A lot
Speaker 1: of this stuff is systemic because if you go back,
Speaker 1: you can go back to the nineteen thirties. In the
Speaker 1: black community. It seems like every decade we get a
Speaker 1: tech with a new drug. In the sixties it was heroin.
Speaker 1: I remember, you know, even two sixties and seventies it
Speaker 1: was heroin. I would go into the back. I remember
Speaker 1: living this apartment building when I was eight years old, right,
Speaker 1: and I would go to the back and it would
Speaker 1: be needles all over the place, and I remember I
Speaker 1: was outside with my shoes off, planning. I remember my
Speaker 1: mama snapped me up and beat my ass. I told
Speaker 1: you don't walk off this house without no shoes on.
Speaker 1: And I didn't understand. I was a little hid on
Speaker 1: why she was so mad, mad mad, But she understood.
Speaker 1: I stepped on one of them needles. I could work
Speaker 1: around the overdose. You know, this was the seventies, you
Speaker 1: know who those I believe the ades was around even
Speaker 1: back then, but they didn't know what it was, you know,
Speaker 1: but anything could have happened, right, and so we had
Speaker 1: we went from heroin, we want to crack. Then they
Speaker 1: came back with the you know, with the peels because
Speaker 1: if you remember in the eighties they went through a rash.
Speaker 1: You know, this OPIOU epidemic is nothing new because at
Speaker 1: one time they had hospitals pain management so to speak,
Speaker 1: hospitals that opened up in and it was always in
Speaker 1: the hood to where pretty much you going that motherfucker,
Speaker 1: they gonna write you a prescription for whatever you want
Speaker 1: to get. I mean they was taking quay, lose and
Speaker 1: ship back then, you know, yeah, you know, and here
Speaker 1: we go again. Did you get the lean and we've
Speaker 1: lost so many. Then it's then it's just really pervasive
Speaker 1: in the music, Like, um, I'm a three six Mafia fan.
Speaker 1: They all no qualms, are telling you we snore, we snore,
Speaker 1: we're sniffering, we're drinking, we're pouring up in his motherfucker.
Speaker 1: Then in U g K what we're two of the
Speaker 1: first you know acts that that made it known that
Speaker 1: about snorting. You know they sport the cocaine. Because I'm
Speaker 1: gonna tell you this my pops too. You know, my
Speaker 1: pop is the sixties nigga when they wore the suits
Speaker 1: and they had the pinky rings with the little they
Speaker 1: got a cram and their pinky ring and ship and
Speaker 1: they you know what I mean, doing that. My pop said,
Speaker 1: he did that. Never once got a dig He said, Man,
Speaker 1: I did that ship the party with the party. He said,
Speaker 1: I don't know what they put in this ship. Now
Speaker 1: I ain't working with him, but that's just what they did.
Speaker 1: That was like some baller ship. When you know when
Speaker 1: you that was a baller ship. Nigga happens ringing on
Speaker 1: and he got him a Graham up and that motherfucker
Speaker 1: and he just floating doing his thing. That was the same.
Speaker 1: Excuse me, that was the same way when cocaine came out.
Speaker 1: When cocaine came out, everybody was punching the workers. Everybody
Speaker 1: can do a learner to and go to work and
Speaker 1: be productive. Then when when they come with this other
Speaker 1: ship and now they dope things and everybody stretching. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you had every every hood had that guy to get
Speaker 1: the new ship. And he always had a smoker, somebody
Speaker 1: that smoked weed to test that ship. Yea, And they
Speaker 1: went off a word of out from that one motherfucker
Speaker 1: that tested and was bent over in the corner somewhere.
Speaker 1: Now everybody want that drunk because you get fucked up.
Speaker 1: That's what they're looking for. When they get high. They're
Speaker 1: gonna spend their money so they can get sucked up.
Speaker 1: And so think about go ahead, I'm sorry, James, go ahead. No,
Speaker 1: I was just gonna say, and think about how how
Speaker 1: cold it is today, bro. Nowadays with this fitting all ship.
Speaker 1: Whoever got the ship that mother the hot pack the
Speaker 1: niggas are dying from. They want that ship. That's some
Speaker 1: cold ship. Whoever got the hot pack of catching bodies,
Speaker 1: that's the ship that they want, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And the fitting all is just such a new you know, Pariah,
Speaker 1: It's such a new threat because it's so the instability
Speaker 1: of it, you know what I mean, the ship all
Speaker 1: over the place, Yeah, like just a little grain because
Speaker 1: the ship be dope so fucked up, you know. And
Speaker 1: even these pills with these faith, these rock seas and
Speaker 1: these fake as ox seas and all of that ship
Speaker 1: they should be having fitting all and ship all in it.
Speaker 1: And you know that's how motherfucker's be o dn like
Speaker 1: like you said, like you said, with culture though, because
Speaker 1: think about the code that black you know what he said.
Speaker 1: I knew the purpose fake, but I ate it anyway,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. You know, and you don't
Speaker 1: know what the fucking that bitch to be rap boys,
Speaker 1: you don't know what it is. And you know what,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you something. I was told to one
Speaker 1: of my own boys the other day and he was
Speaker 1: told about his nineteen year old like the smoke weed
Speaker 1: and ship like that. Right, he was like, I'm a
Speaker 1: whoop his ass. I said, Bro, I'm gonna tell you something.
Speaker 1: You're almost better off because that niggas go smoke weed
Speaker 1: if you want twenty way or now, you're almost better
Speaker 1: off going to get dispensing. Just get this ship for
Speaker 1: him and say, nig, don't do that ship and this
Speaker 1: I was here, you go, because I'm gonna tell you
Speaker 1: they're gonna try it anyway. Bro. Yeah, we can sit
Speaker 1: up here, his parents, We can sit up here as
Speaker 1: parents and look at our kids through rose colored lenses
Speaker 1: just like we went off the right ship. Yeah, big experiment.
Speaker 1: You just up on my kids and know what the
Speaker 1: time and he was, man, just behind nobody. Don't be passed,
Speaker 1: no joints with no motherfucker because give some to the
Speaker 1: here you walking around this motherfucker, you'll be stuck in
Speaker 1: the twelfth dimension. I know. I know. People just smoke
Speaker 1: ship that never came back from it. Mind in the
Speaker 1: right sense, you know. And and I think that's important
Speaker 1: to like what you the point that you're making. Man,
Speaker 1: we have to be one hunted with our kids. You know,
Speaker 1: the same thing with my kids. You know, my kids,
Speaker 1: especially my oldest daughter. You know, I had my first
Speaker 1: shot when I was sixteen, and you know I laced her.
Speaker 1: I raised her like almost like an oldest son. You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. And you know I told her
Speaker 1: about drugs and weed. I mean, truth be told. You know,
Speaker 1: WE was my hustle back then, so I even, you know,
Speaker 1: to an extent, exposed her to that side of it
Speaker 1: of getting money, you know. I mean, you know, there's
Speaker 1: no handbook for parenting, you know what I mean, that's
Speaker 1: what happens. But um, you know, and I always told her, man,
Speaker 1: let the things have to have it, you know. Now
Speaker 1: fast forward. You know, my daughter thirty years old, she's
Speaker 1: a grown woman. I respect her. She smokes weed. That's
Speaker 1: her choice, you know, Um, and I don't judge her
Speaker 1: about it. You know what I'm saying. Uh, you know,
Speaker 1: she can't smoke in our house when she's over. She
Speaker 1: asked her to step out, smoke outside, be respectful. But
Speaker 1: you know, I think that you know, and you know,
Speaker 1: back in the day, they used to say WE was
Speaker 1: a gateway drug. Um. I don't know that to be true,
Speaker 1: but I believe for some people it can be with
Speaker 1: addictive personalities and people like James said that could be
Speaker 1: dealing with you know, some type of self medication situation.
Speaker 1: And they wanted to hire. You know, we was the beginning.
Speaker 1: How can I get hired? How can I get hired?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, so um, you know, but
Speaker 1: but like I keep saying, you know, what is the
Speaker 1: what is the alternative? You know? You know it's that
Speaker 1: are listening, Like what could be the you know instead
Speaker 1: of trying to self medicate and and and get high
Speaker 1: and try to run away from your problem? Was like,
Speaker 1: what do they do? You know? Do they get help?
Speaker 1: What are they running from? Do they go talk to somebody?
Speaker 1: Do you know what? What? What advice will we get them?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying? You know what I think
Speaker 1: you have to be very open and honest with your children. Again,
Speaker 1: I know plenty of pearans to put the rose colored
Speaker 1: lands on. And I'm gonna tell you the way society
Speaker 1: use everybody and knew what your kids are doing, but
Speaker 1: you you'll be sitting up there be the only dumbass
Speaker 1: sitting in La la land and not knowing what's going on.
Speaker 1: You have to give your kids to reel about stuff
Speaker 1: and tell them maybe look, if you try that, you
Speaker 1: may die. Because my biggest thing if I was always
Speaker 1: scared of death because when I was younger, I was
Speaker 1: allowed the opportunity to experiment. The big thing in Ohio
Speaker 1: was what all the white homies would do. They would
Speaker 1: be on that black tar heroin. They would had that
Speaker 1: black tar heir when it was cheap, like everybody had
Speaker 1: that ship and they would be in their smoking that ship.
Speaker 1: They tried to get me to try that ship one day,
Speaker 1: but I remember talking to my pops about that anything
Speaker 1: they had h and I wasn't working with it. Well,
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm cool on that. I don't want
Speaker 1: none of that ship because I see how this nig
Speaker 1: over in the corner doing this, he nodding off and ship.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to funk with it. So my thing
Speaker 1: was this. I actually tried weed when I was younger
Speaker 1: and didn't funk with it. I just I didn't. It
Speaker 1: wasn't for me. My pops is my pop smoke weed
Speaker 1: back then and still is a regular weed smoker. And
Speaker 1: that motherfucker was an account one of the sharpest do was.
Speaker 1: I know, I've never known him to do the other ship.
Speaker 1: He told me said, yeah, in the sixties, I did
Speaker 1: this and that. But my pops ain't never been no
Speaker 1: fiend as nigga. But he he got his little um,
Speaker 1: his little cigar box the crib with his little weed
Speaker 1: and he brought them up with joint. He's sitting if smoked,
Speaker 1: that motherfucker with his woman and watch TV and going
Speaker 1: about his business right and pop on upstairs. You know. So,
Speaker 1: I think the biggest thing quote we have to do
Speaker 1: is realized, man, that we are under attack, and the
Speaker 1: only way we go continue standing under the attack if
Speaker 1: we don't start keeping the reel with ourselves and start saying, man, look,
Speaker 1: we gotta start making different choices. We gotta start looking
Speaker 1: at alternatives. U. We have to start expressing our feelings
Speaker 1: because black men have a tendency the car departmentalized ship.
Speaker 1: But we have ship in our mind and we just
Speaker 1: keep it in there and anything. It's like anything else.
Speaker 1: If we feel the water balloon up to full water,
Speaker 1: what's gonna happen. This will eventually explode. That's what happened.
Speaker 1: That's when people have nervous breakdowns. That's when you see
Speaker 1: the little rampages that you see. That's why you see
Speaker 1: so much real rage. Now the people actually don't got
Speaker 1: a problem with each other, but motherfucker, the stress level
Speaker 1: is so high. It's just that person in that car
Speaker 1: that might have cut you off, that may not be
Speaker 1: thinking about you. He laid for work, so he's trying
Speaker 1: to get the work. He go around you and cut
Speaker 1: you off. You're mad. Now you chased this motherfucker down
Speaker 1: up the road and you're open his ask when he
Speaker 1: get off the car, you might get shot and lose
Speaker 1: your life all because you didn't have nobody to talk to.
Speaker 1: You didn't want to express your feelings. You know what
Speaker 1: I mean, Because you think about it, life can be
Speaker 1: stressful in the motherfucker. You've got people especially and what
Speaker 1: were yet right now, You've got people whose financial who
Speaker 1: financially have not recovered since COVID. Because I'm gonna tell
Speaker 1: you one thing, had that king about COVID and all
Speaker 1: that stimulus money. You had some people that was making
Speaker 1: more money than they ever made. You know, you had
Speaker 1: a guy that worked at McDonald's. He getting unemployment. Now
Speaker 1: now he's getting eight hundred of thousand dollars a week.
Speaker 1: To him, that's the world. Now, he don't want to
Speaker 1: go back to that job. But mcdownalds or that job.
Speaker 1: But mcdownalds ain't dead for him no more. And he's depressed.
Speaker 1: When you can't take care of your family and provide
Speaker 1: a lot, a lot, he said, I remember the darkest
Speaker 1: period I had, man and I suffered from depression, and
Speaker 1: I've been very open about it. I was suffered from depression.
Speaker 1: Before the darkest period I've ever had, I was working
Speaker 1: for a publishing company. I was making a quarter million
Speaker 1: dollars a year. I was doing my thing. I had
Speaker 1: a black card or whatever I wanted to go get
Speaker 1: it if I would, and bought a ten thousand dollars suit.
Speaker 1: They won. Question. We was making a lot of money
Speaker 1: back then. Um, I was getting a lot of money
Speaker 1: from other little stuff. You know, I'm managing glasses and
Speaker 1: glasses and cracking at that time, so I'm getting money
Speaker 1: from everywhere. I'm getting money and nothing lumps, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. I got good money. I remember when
Speaker 1: I lost that job. I lost my identity almost and
Speaker 1: I said after that, it was hard for me to
Speaker 1: go back because I was making money even before that, right,
Speaker 1: it was hard for me to go back to the
Speaker 1: idea of what am I going to do now? Because
Speaker 1: when you're in the industry, you know this cord that's
Speaker 1: the best time to get a job. I had people
Speaker 1: from Turtle Music offer me jobs. I had people from
Speaker 1: Universal Music offer me jobs. I wouldn't leave because they
Speaker 1: couldn't max with that one company was giving me right.
Speaker 1: So once I lost that job and I kind of
Speaker 1: was being arrogant, my u brisk. I can do that
Speaker 1: now through constling years later and say that was my fault,
Speaker 1: because you know what, I remember when they closed the
Speaker 1: office down, the lady told me, she said, well you
Speaker 1: can continue working from the house. But I was so
Speaker 1: arrogant like that. You know, They're gonna cut my pin
Speaker 1: in half and I'm gonna work at the house, ain'tle
Speaker 1: I got something that ass. I quit calling them from
Speaker 1: them everybody else. So what you're doing in mind right now?
Speaker 1: Oh well I'm no longer with them. Oh let me
Speaker 1: get back with you. And I learned how the industry
Speaker 1: work because those people and actually wanted me. They wanted
Speaker 1: me to go, and there appeal for some of the
Speaker 1: people I brought over there. You gotta remember I'd had
Speaker 1: my first platinum record with the ice cream paining job ship,
Speaker 1: right that was. I had something to do with that record.
Speaker 1: I signed that producer. I found him and actually you know,
Speaker 1: helped put that whole thing together. Um, we had some
Speaker 1: other stuff going on. We had an opportunity at that
Speaker 1: time to sign Kenfred Lamar they passed on. We could
Speaker 1: have actually signed the whole TV roster. They passed on it.
Speaker 1: You know, when I thought about all that stuff, and man,
Speaker 1: I was just kind of stuck. Man Like, I went
Speaker 1: through a period of um where I was just almost
Speaker 1: the only way I could describe it as a mobilarity,
Speaker 1: to where I just couldn't move. I was just like stuck.
Speaker 1: Every day I woke up at twelve o'clock, kind of
Speaker 1: walked around his motherfucking the days. Man, you know, would
Speaker 1: go sometimes a day or two it. I was washing
Speaker 1: my ass dog, and I was just gained a bunch
Speaker 1: of fucking weight. The little bit of money I did.
Speaker 1: That is when you got it. Back then, I wouldn't
Speaker 1: save the ship dog, and I was thinking, you know,
Speaker 1: when I put the job, but I just traded. I
Speaker 1: got this man, that money went so fucking fast because
Speaker 1: you still have those same bills, and you still have
Speaker 1: the same lifestyle, you know, And when you wake up
Speaker 1: a look outside and see tolds getting cars getting told
Speaker 1: off the driveway and ship they came to the point, dog,
Speaker 1: I even get a funk. I sat up here and
Speaker 1: watched them, told my escalator way, and I was just
Speaker 1: so fucking just stuck, man, And you really, you know,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you. That's where my wife leaned being
Speaker 1: on me. And she started telling me, hey, let's go
Speaker 1: to church. You know, I don't wanna go to church.
Speaker 1: Once I started going back to my roofs dog and
Speaker 1: hearing the word of God, I realized that I turned
Speaker 1: into a man that I didn't want to be. I
Speaker 1: wasn't no good to my family. Um. I went back
Speaker 1: in the regular world for a minute. Court. I went
Speaker 1: and got me a job. You know what I realized,
Speaker 1: I said, you know what, I got an education. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna get me a job, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: So I wouldn't have got me a sales job. And
Speaker 1: I went back into regular world for a little bit. Man,
Speaker 1: I started coaching my son's football team. And so really
Speaker 1: were most people leaning the drugs. I leaned in the
Speaker 1: guy the family. Yeah, I'm leaning the guy of family.
Speaker 1: And my wife she really helped me through that period. Dog,
Speaker 1: She really helped because it was a very dark period
Speaker 1: for me. Ain't thinking happened. Dog. I thought of killing
Speaker 1: myself because I I was identifying. You know, I went
Speaker 1: from being this provider to where whenever she needed something.
Speaker 1: Dog Like my wife, you know, when my daughter was born,
Speaker 1: she took two years off of work. You know, it
Speaker 1: was like, you don't worry about that. You gotta think
Speaker 1: about the court. At that time, when I had my
Speaker 1: situation with Mind of Music, they assigned me as a
Speaker 1: writer and I had a couple of deals. I had
Speaker 1: to deal with a company called Peak would go for
Speaker 1: an England and they were paying me nine dollars a
Speaker 1: record nine nine hours, but nine pounds a record. At
Speaker 1: that time, the pound was like two to one, so
Speaker 1: I was wind up getting seventeen dollars a record. So
Speaker 1: I wasn't doing them selling five six thousand pieces. But
Speaker 1: I was releasing albums every three months. I was distributing
Speaker 1: all that you know Big eight during that time, I
Speaker 1: was distripping all the dog ship over there. So I
Speaker 1: just had an abundance of money because I got these
Speaker 1: people paying me a quarter million dollars a year. I'm
Speaker 1: making about thirty forty rats a month from just selling
Speaker 1: records dog overseas at the time. And then what happened
Speaker 1: was that ship slowed these you remember when Drama got busted. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but drama got cracked. That's when all that ship, even
Speaker 1: though my ship was legitimate, anything that you didn't talk
Speaker 1: about drama from Atlanta. Yeah, when he got busted with
Speaker 1: all that stuff, I was doing the same stuff he
Speaker 1: was doing, but I was doing it with legal stuff.
Speaker 1: But they were records that wasn't necessarily cleared from the
Speaker 1: label like Das. You know he had ship was distributing
Speaker 1: snoops mixtapes and you know you figured like this, you
Speaker 1: know Big eight, Big eight I was a CD. He
Speaker 1: cool with that. I'm I'm talking and he was on
Speaker 1: the CDs because it's just us lying, ribbing nobody. But
Speaker 1: it's an usle Dog. I used to walk around dog,
Speaker 1: and then I was do tours over in Japan and stuff. Bro.
Speaker 1: I would come back home with just rows of money
Speaker 1: dog Like. I remember one time he got so bad man.
Speaker 1: Remember when he used to win him to both chains. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I remember one time I had like thirty five dollars
Speaker 1: in one of my pockets and my wife watched them
Speaker 1: and the money got kind of fucked up. I wasn't
Speaker 1: like shot. I gave that ship to my kids though. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was just like that dog. I didn't have no
Speaker 1: respect to what was going on. And when you lose
Speaker 1: that dog, and I'm gonna tell you God got away, man.
Speaker 1: And when your eagle get out of control, God has
Speaker 1: a way of stripping you down to your very minimum dog. Okay,
Speaker 1: you don't want to listen, I'm about to strip your
Speaker 1: ass down and and make you back. You know, people,
Speaker 1: you're back up again. I learned. I learned a less
Speaker 1: than humility dog. And it really was a very humbling
Speaker 1: and life changing experience. Because that's why I talked to
Speaker 1: people when I when I tell people, oh man, somebody
Speaker 1: to kill themselves. That week I was saying all that
Speaker 1: in that week, bro, I said, you can you don't
Speaker 1: never know what no men and going through. When you're depressing,
Speaker 1: you are in a black hole. Literally, you feel no happiness,
Speaker 1: You don't want to be living and and you know
Speaker 1: suicide that that happens when you're coping. Mechanisms have failed,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. When you lose hope, um,
Speaker 1: you know, And I think like sometimes what people have
Speaker 1: to understand is when you can identify a purpose in
Speaker 1: your life. When you identify a purpose, then you tend
Speaker 1: to make you know different choices. You know, what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Um but yeah, you know that depression ship. Like you said,
Speaker 1: it's a it's a it's a dark hole. And you know,
Speaker 1: after my mom passed away, I went into a deep depression.
Speaker 1: And like you said, I used to you know, everybody
Speaker 1: else in the house would get up. My kids will
Speaker 1: go to school, my wife will go to work. I
Speaker 1: would just lay in the in the room, sometimes with
Speaker 1: the TV not not on, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And and I can remember when everybody would come home,
Speaker 1: I would get up and act like I've been doing
Speaker 1: some ship like you know what I mean. And you
Speaker 1: know my money was straight at the time, so I
Speaker 1: didn't necessarily have to be doing anything. But you know,
Speaker 1: um man, that was the U you know, a really
Speaker 1: bad time. But you know, at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: you know again in this world, because you know this
Speaker 1: world as a motherfucker, it would beat you down and
Speaker 1: it will hold you down to keep you down. This
Speaker 1: world would literally stick its long arm to the elbow,
Speaker 1: up your ass and wave you around like a puppet.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. And and and so what
Speaker 1: I found is you you have to be mentally strong,
Speaker 1: spiritually strong, emostly strong, physically strong in this world, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. And I think a lot of people,
Speaker 1: like I said, you have to do your work. I
Speaker 1: had to learn to do my work. Like you deal
Speaker 1: with anxiety. You know. Anxiety is worried about ship that
Speaker 1: ain't even happened. You're you're worried about the future. You know, depression.
Speaker 1: A lot of times you're stuck in the past. You're
Speaker 1: worried about ship you can't even change. It ain't even
Speaker 1: exist anymore, you know what I mean. So I think
Speaker 1: when you consider yourself and and and find and be present,
Speaker 1: and then you know almost like the a A say
Speaker 1: what they saying that they say, you know, uh, what
Speaker 1: is it? You know accepted things? You cannot change that
Speaker 1: And that's the real that's the truth. You know, you
Speaker 1: have to be president. And I think, like I say,
Speaker 1: when you feel like you have something to live for
Speaker 1: and you have a purpose. That's why I tell people, man,
Speaker 1: be a purpose chase and not a paper chaser. You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Because you know, chasing money that
Speaker 1: that that don't give you nothing. You know, money, But
Speaker 1: when you identify a purpose, when you really feel like, damn,
Speaker 1: I'm here for something, and then you're giving. Sometimes giving
Speaker 1: is just affecting other people, you know, because people remember
Speaker 1: how they how you made them feel. People don't remember
Speaker 1: the car you had, the jury you had, all that bullshit,
Speaker 1: but people remember how you made them feel. And that's
Speaker 1: your leg. So and then and then sometimes just got
Speaker 1: damn meditate. I meditate every day and I take inventory
Speaker 1: on my life, right, I think about, you know, the
Speaker 1: things that I need, the things that I don't, situations
Speaker 1: and different things like that to try to so so
Speaker 1: you know, unfuncked my mind and keep it as clear
Speaker 1: as possible. So I think that, you know, and I'm
Speaker 1: saying all this to say, these are tools, and these
Speaker 1: are ways that people can train their minds where they
Speaker 1: don't have to the further drugs. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Just deal with your ship, sift through your ship. And
Speaker 1: I know for some you know, it may be easier
Speaker 1: said than done. You know, everybody's you know, mental for
Speaker 1: to tow and emotional intelligence isn't developed like that, but
Speaker 1: with practice it can be. Because see, the language that
Speaker 1: I'm giving now is not something that I knew years ago.
Speaker 1: This is over time, you know what I'm saying. Hopefully
Speaker 1: I could share it with somebody that's going through it
Speaker 1: now and they could hear it and it could inspire
Speaker 1: them to say, oh shift, I'm not alone. Because depression
Speaker 1: will make you have make you feel like you by yourself,
Speaker 1: like like God is picking on you, like like God
Speaker 1: don't like me. He just sucking over me and every
Speaker 1: body else. You know. But you know, people, you know,
Speaker 1: everybody's fighting a battle that you know, our battles that
Speaker 1: know what body knows about you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: One thing I found without man with dealing with my therapist,
Speaker 1: right because you know your therapist still go to therapy
Speaker 1: twice a month now, you know, because there's certain things
Speaker 1: that man, we need to have conversation sometimes with people
Speaker 1: that you may nothing necessarily I could talk to my
Speaker 1: wife about anything, but some stuff I can't talk to
Speaker 1: my wife about. Everything is some stuff. As a man
Speaker 1: that I go through the shot will have no clue
Speaker 1: to show, you know, you know, he's supposed to let
Speaker 1: them know. We gotta shoulder that ships as unhealthy as
Speaker 1: it is, that's just what it is. You know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. That's us as protector. Sometimes we gotta protect them,
Speaker 1: you know, we may not know. It's been times where fuck,
Speaker 1: I don't know how I'm gonna do certain ship. I
Speaker 1: don't you know, ship maybe a little worse than what
Speaker 1: my old lady may know. But I showed her that,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, because as a man, as
Speaker 1: a protector, that's what I do for my kids. I
Speaker 1: never wanted my kids or my old lady to be
Speaker 1: frettened about nothing. You and me, I've always been kind
Speaker 1: of a leader, right, So it's like with me, you know,
Speaker 1: even with me running this network, I have multiple families
Speaker 1: that depend on me, right, So I remember, man, I
Speaker 1: would like, really, I don't think people had no idea
Speaker 1: how many months I would forfeit getting paid to make
Speaker 1: sure that they had some money. And it's just not
Speaker 1: one person, you're talking about four or five different people.
Speaker 1: And my therapist told me one day, he said, you know,
Speaker 1: to dye on self, be true. You can't be a
Speaker 1: blessing to nobody if you funked up. You gotta make
Speaker 1: sure you straight or you're not gonna be able to
Speaker 1: help nobody. And then one thing he told me to
Speaker 1: is take responsibility for situations that you create. Because I
Speaker 1: remember at one time it led to me having a problem.
Speaker 1: I wanted to put everybody on that one time. Anybody
Speaker 1: that can't I wanted to put them on, but didn't.
Speaker 1: I realized everybody is not worth Everybody can't go. My
Speaker 1: mom used to tell me that everybody can't go. Everybody
Speaker 1: can't go. And it's been people that I love that
Speaker 1: I've had to ex out my life just because it
Speaker 1: was unhealthy for me to be around them. And it's
Speaker 1: just like I had to take care of me. I
Speaker 1: had to take care you know, if this person is
Speaker 1: not bringing nothing genuine to know the type of value,
Speaker 1: what is he wrong for? If he's you know, giving
Speaker 1: you bad information and making you feel even worse, why
Speaker 1: even have them around? Yeah, because you know a phrase
Speaker 1: of the addicts that misery loves company is very true.
Speaker 1: You would have people going to this stuff and they
Speaker 1: would track you down the stuff. It's like dog. One
Speaker 1: thing my uncle Doug told me, and I thought it
Speaker 1: was the coldest in the world. He told me. I
Speaker 1: asked him one day, man, what were your own? Boy?
Speaker 1: Let me when he said, man, I had to stop
Speaker 1: working with him myself. Why Because he said that motherfucker
Speaker 1: always got some ship going on. He said it just
Speaker 1: like that. He said, every time I leave them mother
Speaker 1: Funcker's house, I'm depressed. I stopped with him because he
Speaker 1: was an unlucky motherfucker, and I learned that that's real game.
Speaker 1: You have to not not that you get insensitive for people,
Speaker 1: but sometimes you need to hear. Everybody helps ship. I mean,
Speaker 1: energies are contagious. Energies are contagious, and sometimes you have
Speaker 1: to moderate that ship, like you could care for someone
Speaker 1: you know. But I always say, you don't have to
Speaker 1: set yourself on fire to keep other people warm, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like you have to know you know, man,
Speaker 1: energy is is that's everything where we put out what
Speaker 1: we receive and we have to control that because yeah,
Speaker 1: that ship can be parasitic, especially when it's not reciprocated.
Speaker 1: You know what the energy is a motherfucker's it's like
Speaker 1: you know what I knowiced thumb. Whenever something good would happen,
Speaker 1: you get certain people that won't never call you. You
Speaker 1: don't hear from something good, but the moment they think
Speaker 1: they found something where they gotta barrel over you. Oh man,
Speaker 1: you saw it with such a suckceed about you, so
Speaker 1: with such and such they send you missed, just the
Speaker 1: videos and ship. It's like I have to tell the
Speaker 1: motherfucker's stop sending me ship. Man. I got a computer
Speaker 1: with this motherfucker. I don't need to see that ship.
Speaker 1: I don't care about what they said. I entertained myself
Speaker 1: with that stuff. Let them do what they go do. Yeah,
Speaker 1: let them do what they go doing. Another thing I've
Speaker 1: learned in therapy to court is that you have to
Speaker 1: take time out for yourself sometimes. I've learned. Man. My
Speaker 1: therapist told me one day, he said, I want you
Speaker 1: to cut your phone off. You know, I don't mean
Speaker 1: just cut your phone off for a thing. I want
Speaker 1: you to just cut this buttfuck off outside. You know,
Speaker 1: because my mama got my wife's number. You' wanna get me,
Speaker 1: he said, cut your phone off a week. I've learned.
Speaker 1: The worst thing in our lives right now is this
Speaker 1: motherfucker right here, because for the first time in history,
Speaker 1: do you remember when we just had home phones? James, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Moco call your house. They catch you when they catch you, right,
Speaker 1: But you know, when you land up with your wife somewhere,
Speaker 1: your kids and Disneyland, that motherfucker ring the first thing
Speaker 1: you want to do is what's that Now you wind
Speaker 1: up spending the time next you can have with your family.
Speaker 1: And I'm gonna tell you something. Time is the most
Speaker 1: precious commodity on this planet because when we lose time
Speaker 1: court we are never going to get that time back.
Speaker 1: You can't get it back. It's not like you've got
Speaker 1: time banked up somewhere. Well you know what, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: go take me a couple of months out or I
Speaker 1: want to do that. No, you're not gonna get that
Speaker 1: time back. So you have to value your time. Especially
Speaker 1: I hear so many older people want to lose their spouse.
Speaker 1: The first thing they say is I wish I would
Speaker 1: have spent more time. Yeah, we all say that when
Speaker 1: we lose loved ones. You know what I'm saying, because
Speaker 1: you know, it's almost like that that that emotion of
Speaker 1: of of of you know, guilt or or regret is
Speaker 1: stronger than gratitude. You know what I'm saying. Um, you know,
Speaker 1: but you know, hey, like I say, man, life is
Speaker 1: hard as ship bro. You know it's But but what
Speaker 1: I've learned too is you know what what life? Life
Speaker 1: is hard, but sometimes humans complicated. To be very honest,
Speaker 1: with you. You have to exercise a level of funcket
Speaker 1: in life. You have to sure, you gotta understand the
Speaker 1: controls and illusion. The best thing that we can do
Speaker 1: is try to influence the outcome that we want. But
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, it's gonna be what
Speaker 1: it's gonna be. So you know, all we can do
Speaker 1: is do our best, you know, be the best people
Speaker 1: that we can be. You know. Um, I was having
Speaker 1: a conversation with someone the other day. I tend to
Speaker 1: kind of have these conversations with millennials, and you know,
Speaker 1: millennials are built a lot different, you know, you know,
Speaker 1: And I was talking to him about grace and mercy
Speaker 1: and forgiveness. You know, we carried so much unnecessary baggage
Speaker 1: in life. That's what that's what contributes to depression and
Speaker 1: anxiety and drug use because we got all these unnecessary
Speaker 1: fucking baggage. You know, you gotta learn how to cut
Speaker 1: that ship off. Sometimes we are own worse enemy because
Speaker 1: we were in our heads with a bunch of ship,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Um, you know, pass ship.
Speaker 1: We all got pass ship, you know, But at the
Speaker 1: end of the day, that ship don't exist no more,
Speaker 1: you know, what I'm saying that we're carrying it around.
Speaker 1: So I think, you know, just going to the self work,
Speaker 1: you know, just doing the work. You know. And one
Speaker 1: thing about me, a quality that that I have is
Speaker 1: I can be a hundred percent honest with myself, no
Speaker 1: matter how uncomfortable the situation is. Many people lie to themselves,
Speaker 1: you know, when you start trying. It's one thing that's
Speaker 1: trying to slick somebody else, but when you try to
Speaker 1: start slicking yourself, you funked up. You know. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: you know, I always encourage people, man, just do the work,
Speaker 1: because everybody's self work is different, you know what i mean. Like,
Speaker 1: you know, with me, I knew I had them. You know,
Speaker 1: even though I'm cool and I'm calm and I'm reserved,
Speaker 1: I have a very vengeful spirit, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: You know, if you do something to me, it's like
Speaker 1: like I'm I'm gonna get you. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: If it's ten years from now, like I'm not gonna forget.
Speaker 1: And I knew that that wasn't healthy. I was like, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm putting out bad energy even with that, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, that's why I say grace and mercy,
Speaker 1: forgiveness is usually for you. It's for you always, not
Speaker 1: even for the other motherfucker. You know. So when you're
Speaker 1: carrying in those gripes and those that that's heavy baggage
Speaker 1: and all that ship weighs you down and it alters
Speaker 1: your perspective because you know, perspective is the biggest thing,
Speaker 1: and it's fun is all about how you see. Ship
Speaker 1: is your disposition, you know what I'm saying, and it
Speaker 1: it tends to cater to your attitude as well. And
Speaker 1: your attitude is gonna reflect the ship that you you know, uh,
Speaker 1: that you receive, you know. So yeah, I think it's
Speaker 1: just doing the self work, bro, you know, just doing
Speaker 1: that health work. You know. One thing I want to say, Court,
Speaker 1: is that this right here, Um, we don't have time machines.
Speaker 1: And that's one thing you know, I learned my therapist.
Speaker 1: He said, you know, because I had all this stuff
Speaker 1: that I didn't realize it's bothering me. That was in
Speaker 1: the past, right he said, Man, check this out. We
Speaker 1: don't have time machines. Why are you worried about that ship.
Speaker 1: It's not like you can go back and correct it.
Speaker 1: Because even if you did, even if we could, you
Speaker 1: can may go back and funk up something and you
Speaker 1: come back in your life, you've got another problem all
Speaker 1: that you're dealing with. One thing about it, bro, we
Speaker 1: are going to always have issues. We are always going
Speaker 1: to have complications. And I don't care if you've got
Speaker 1: twenty million dollars in the bank, that don't matter. Nobody's
Speaker 1: in nobody don't matter, That don't matter. You hear about
Speaker 1: people all the time worth thirty forty million dollars putting
Speaker 1: a pistol in their mouth and just ding all because
Speaker 1: they cannot deal with it all. All the money they
Speaker 1: have is not go sure the elves that they got
Speaker 1: going in their life. But this is one thing I
Speaker 1: want to say, Man, if you've got a problem with drugs,
Speaker 1: go get some help. Drugs ain't drugs, ain't nomber the
Speaker 1: band day. They're not gonna fix nothing. They don't fix
Speaker 1: the damn thing. All they're gonna do is make it,
Speaker 1: make it, make it worse, and find some you know,
Speaker 1: find a spiritual You know, I'm not saying you have
Speaker 1: to be a Christian or a Muslim, but whatever that
Speaker 1: that moves you to to peace. You know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: and to believe in something higher than yourself, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, and something you can be relied upon,
Speaker 1: like make the necessary changes. That's really what this life
Speaker 1: ship is is to continue to evolve. If you don't
Speaker 1: evolve or nigga dissolved, you know what I'm saying, So
Speaker 1: you can't stay in the same place. Be open to
Speaker 1: new ideas, like from the hood, just like all of y'all,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Like I've done some of
Speaker 1: this ship. You know I was. I ain't gonna say
Speaker 1: I was as gangster as James, but you know I
Speaker 1: did my ship right, you know. But so at this point,
Speaker 1: but I had to allow myself to evolve and accept
Speaker 1: new ideas, you know what I'm saying. So I think
Speaker 1: a lot of people, you know, it's easier to blame
Speaker 1: than it is to change. It's easy to say, mom, daddy,
Speaker 1: you know, it wasn't it was this, it was dad,
Speaker 1: it's the homies, it's this, that and the other. No,
Speaker 1: at some point, motherfucker, you making choices. You know. Anybody
Speaker 1: that don't allow you to grow past that person, Like
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you something, they're gonna fall off. From you.
Speaker 1: They're gonna fall out here. The worst thing I ever heard,
Speaker 1: and I'm not gonna get the singing name because it
Speaker 1: ain't the pop that I heard somebody saying, I told
Speaker 1: you I could turn them back into Maum James, and
Speaker 1: it sounded so evil, bro, it was kind of like, damn,
Speaker 1: So you just want to homely, just to go back
Speaker 1: and just sunk all this ship off now because he's
Speaker 1: making progress. When this life it bothers you that bad?
Speaker 1: You really you really want to see this man back
Speaker 1: on the block on his ass. Yeah, they ally, they
Speaker 1: still listen. There's powers that be. That's the devil, bro.
Speaker 1: It's niggas trying to trick me out of my spot.
Speaker 1: Is niggas trying to trick James, trick you? And I
Speaker 1: didn't have them. I didn't almost been tricked to. You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, I don't almost fail for the
Speaker 1: fucking banana tailpipe. But yeah, man, like that's that's why
Speaker 1: I say Nigga's especially Nigga's just doing something. Nigga's gotta
Speaker 1: be emostly strong, mentally strong, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: Spiritually strong, all of that ship. You gotta keep that
Speaker 1: arm wrong when you nigga, it's a war outside. That's
Speaker 1: how I look at my life. There's a war outside,
Speaker 1: so many fucking wars. It's financial war, emotional war. It's
Speaker 1: bitches trying to get at me, trying to funk up
Speaker 1: my my, my relationship and temp me. It's it's niggas
Speaker 1: trying to you know, play with me and trick me
Speaker 1: off the streets. Is niggas trying to rob me, A
Speaker 1: police trying to arrest me? Is you know what I'm
Speaker 1: saying like, And nigga gotta just you know, keep it
Speaker 1: tie bro right. A moultitude of motherfucker's and you know
Speaker 1: we call them haters, no man, but there's people out
Speaker 1: there that really can't stand and see somebody else content,
Speaker 1: so they want to throw everybody of misery and way
Speaker 1: they're feeling like. I'll tell everybody all the time if
Speaker 1: you catch your troll in your comments me, I don't
Speaker 1: go out my way to look at ship that don't
Speaker 1: enterest me. But you have the same motherfucker all in
Speaker 1: your mix. He telling you about this over you ain't
Speaker 1: this and man, you'd be thinking, Man, I'm pretty sure
Speaker 1: I'm doing better than your bum mass Yeah, real talk.
Speaker 1: You can just tell by the comment and nigga. You
Speaker 1: can tell all about the nigga with what come out
Speaker 1: of his mouth. If a nigga is hating all the
Speaker 1: time and gossiping and talking about other niggas, he's talking
Speaker 1: about you too. He gossip in about you too, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. So I always say, like I
Speaker 1: used to tell motherfucker's all the time. Man, you hang around,
Speaker 1: you know, uh, nine broken niggas, nine negative niggas. You're
Speaker 1: finn to be the tent. You know, you could tell
Speaker 1: what the nigga owned. You just let him talk, you know.
Speaker 1: And when we go ind and right there, that was perfect. Well,
Speaker 1: that concludes another episode of Against the Chronicles podcast. Be
Speaker 1: sure to download the I Heart app and subscribe to
Speaker 1: The Gangster Chronicles podcast. For Apple users, find a purple
Speaker 1: mic on the front of your screen, subscribe to the show,
Speaker 1: leave a comment and rating. Executive producers for The Gangster
Speaker 1: Chronicles podcast and Norman Steve James McDonald, Aran m c tyler,
Speaker 1: our visual media directors Brian White, and our audio editors
Speaker 1: Taylor Hayes. The Gangster Chronicles is a production of I
Speaker 1: Heart Media Network and The Black Effect podcast Network. For
Speaker 1: more podcast from My heart Radio, visit the I heart
Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple podcast wherever you're listen to your podcasts,