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Speaker 1: Welcome to Desperately Devoted.

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Speaker 2: Think of us as your favorite neighbors as we chat

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Speaker 2: about life and relationships.

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Speaker 3: All while we revisit the iconic show Desperate Housewives together.

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Speaker 4: I'm Terry Hatcher, I'm Andrea Bowen, and I'm Emerson Tunny. Well, Hi,

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Speaker 4: welcome back to Desperately Devoted. Hello, my favorite podcast that

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Speaker 4: I've ever hosted. Well, we get to rewatch Desperate Housewives

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Speaker 4: every week.

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Speaker 3: This week we.

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Speaker 2: Are rewatching episode twelve, which was amazing, and Weerson and Andrew.

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Speaker 2: How was your week. I've missed you. I love seeing

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Speaker 2: your little faces.

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Speaker 1: It was good. It was a really busy week.

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Speaker 5: It was a combination of busyness and fullness and so

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Speaker 5: much gratitude and surging pregnancy hormones that made me feel

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Speaker 5: totally out of control. And I was googling in the

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Speaker 5: middle of the night, like what is pregnancy rage? And

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Speaker 5: I found out that there is a thing in their

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Speaker 5: third trimester which I'm now in of pregnancy rage.

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Speaker 1: And oh, thank god for online communities.

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Speaker 5: Not always sometimes there's scary bad places, but in pregnancy,

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Speaker 5: I think, oh, thanks for my people letting me know

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Speaker 5: that what I'm feeling is totally valid. And okay and normal.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I mean I kind of have that with

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Speaker 2: the sandwich videos I'm doing about caregiving on my Instagram. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: creating a community and podcasts do that, you know, and

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Speaker 2: that's what we're trying to do here.

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Speaker 6: So yeah, yeah, I alwish your week.

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Speaker 2: My week.

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Speaker 3: My week has been good. I mean, I'm working. I'm

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Speaker 3: working really hard on a pitch that I a movie

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Speaker 3: I'm pitching, and it's really been one of those incredible

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Speaker 3: experiences when you drop into a story that you feel

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Speaker 3: so passionate about telling, and a part of you feels like,

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Speaker 3: you know, what this is actually already been told and

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Speaker 3: thinking about I mean, slightly different, but that kind of

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Speaker 3: connectivity of how you feel a part of something larger,

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Speaker 3: you know, whether in the case of Desperate Housewives it's

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Speaker 3: the community of a street, the way the community of

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Speaker 3: the neighborhood comes together in your case, Andrea, finding online forums,

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Speaker 3: in the case of our podcast right now, you know,

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Speaker 3: finding our listeners and thinking what makes us feel not

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Speaker 3: alone in the world. I've really been meditating a lot

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Speaker 3: on this week. How I think the idea of being

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Speaker 3: truly no by another person is the biggest gift.

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Speaker 6: That we and can have I mean known, I guess

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Speaker 6: seen as part of me.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but sometimes I think we're seen and we aren't

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Speaker 3: actually known. And to be known by someone and recognized

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Speaker 3: in that way, I think, you know, when thinking about

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Speaker 3: the idea of Martha Hooper, like what constitutes an exciting

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Speaker 3: life or in her case, an exciting death as we

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Speaker 3: get into in this episode. But I feel like, to me,

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Speaker 3: an exciting life is a life where I feel that

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Speaker 3: I am known by the people around me. I love that.

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Speaker 5: I mean, I'm committed to continue to know you, re

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Speaker 5: meet you through all of your many colors and phases

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Speaker 5: of life.

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Speaker 2: That's an interesting thing that you would put it that way, though, too,

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Speaker 2: because it makes me think about how sometimes we are

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Speaker 2: not able to broaden our view of somebody like they

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Speaker 2: are what they are when we first meet them, and

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Speaker 2: if we know them for decades, we don't actually let

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Speaker 2: them evolve into maybe a different version of themselves, which

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Speaker 2: reminds me of what Susan and Edie go through a

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Speaker 2: little bit in this episode, which we'll get to all.

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Speaker 2: I got to ask you first, though, has anybody desperately

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Speaker 2: devoted to anything this week?

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Speaker 6: For me, it was my.

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Speaker 2: Pillow because I, like you, was very busy and super

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Speaker 2: tired and overworked and overtraveled and overvirused, and I just

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Speaker 2: wanted to be in my bed on my pillow at

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Speaker 2: all times.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, So for me, it was my pillow.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, for me, it is my mother.

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Speaker 3: Oh.

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Speaker 5: I am so desperately devoted to my mom. I feel

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Speaker 5: so extra connected to her throughout this pregnancy. And I

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Speaker 5: just have to say that one of her gifts to

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Speaker 5: me at my shower was to bring me which you

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Speaker 5: both saw, the outfit that I wore when she brought

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Speaker 5: me home from the hospital, and she has kept it

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Speaker 5: in pristine condition and she gave it to me, and

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Speaker 5: that is what I'm going to bring my little girl

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Speaker 5: home in. So it's beauty much, but that's what I'm

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Speaker 5: devoting to.

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Speaker 6: Wait to see that.

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Speaker 3: That was the most beautiful, little yellow baby outfit. God,

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Speaker 3: it made me so happy. I think I'm desperately devoted

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Speaker 3: to my Spotify playlist right now. I make playlists for

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Speaker 3: each project i'm writing, and I have one for the

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Speaker 3: project I'm pitching later this week. And I was kind

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Speaker 3: of stuck in the story and I put it on

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Speaker 3: and I went for a long drive and I really

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Speaker 3: like to do that. I sometimes like let myself watch

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Speaker 3: how I imagine the movie would unfold and what the

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Speaker 3: soundtrack might be. And so music has really been a

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Speaker 3: great unsticker. It's unstuck me from various Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Inspire me a lot of ways about music in my life,

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Speaker 2: and I've had other people suggest that to me, and

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Speaker 2: I find music can be a good unsticker.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Well, okay, so speaking of music, Yeah, this episode episode twelve,

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Speaker 3: every Day a Little Death comes from the stephen Son

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Speaker 3: Time musical A Little Night Music from nineteen seventy three.

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Speaker 1: This one aired on January sixteenth, two thousand and five.

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Speaker 3: I know we're into five, we're out of two thousand

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Speaker 3: and four. I love it.

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Speaker 2: And my highlight reel for this episode, which by the way,

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Speaker 2: I'm now referring to it as my highlight reel because

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Speaker 2: it's football season and I'm a huge football fan and

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Speaker 2: I love everything football and I had football on all

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Speaker 2: day yesterday and so but the forty nine ers lost

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Speaker 2: and that was sad, and they lost badly so and

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Speaker 2: they're a lot of their team is beat up. So

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Speaker 2: that's not a good sign for my team. But anyway,

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Speaker 2: my highlight reel on episode twelve was Missus Hooper's death.

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Speaker 2: Death is confirmed, your body is found? Lynette Is she

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Speaker 2: uses the false assumption that her son has cancer to

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Speaker 2: help her get into the overbooked yoga.

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Speaker 3: Class that a new parenting low to me. I mean

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Speaker 3: to go from gum and the hair to my childhoods

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Speaker 3: a terminal illness, so I can just please let me

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Speaker 3: into yoga is really karmically. I think you're circling the

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Speaker 3: karmic drain. There.

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Speaker 2: I love that image, circling the karmic drain. And car

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Speaker 2: Wills is out of jail. He's home, but he's also

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Speaker 2: on house arrest. So he's home, but he's also stuck.

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Speaker 6: And he gets.

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Speaker 2: It in his head that the way to be the

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Speaker 2: man of the house and control Gabby is to replace

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Speaker 2: her birth control pills with some sort of talk about

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Speaker 2: circling the drain.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, oh my god, I mean this is abhorrent to me,

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Speaker 3: and I have so much to say about it, but

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Speaker 3: I don't want to get in it.

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Speaker 6: We'll get involved with your heart.

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Speaker 2: Then we have Brie, who continues to hang out with

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Speaker 2: George even though she is really using it as a

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Speaker 2: friendship and understanding that it's not going to evolve into

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Speaker 2: anything more romantic. So she's with her wacky pharmacist who

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Speaker 2: proceeds to shoot his toe off at a shooting range.

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Speaker 3: Where date really ended in a bang.

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Speaker 6: Nicely done.

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Speaker 2: We need a drum roll, but yeah, and then Edie

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Speaker 2: ropes the very guilty Susan, who feels so because she

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Speaker 2: knows that she burned Eddie's house down. She ropes her

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Speaker 2: into going out to a remote lake to spread missus

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Speaker 2: Hooper's ashes. And for me, those were my highlights and

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Speaker 2: I love the themes that came up around them. Do

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Speaker 2: you guys have anything to add well?

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Speaker 3: I wanted to ask because you mentioned the Edie and

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Speaker 3: Susan in the rowboat scene, which I totally want to

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Speaker 3: get into, and I want to hear about if you

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Speaker 3: remember filming that and where that was shot. But there's

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Speaker 3: a line that Edie says to Susan, and just because

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Speaker 3: you mentioned the forty nine ers, where Edie says, I

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Speaker 3: bet you were a cheerleader in high school. And I

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Speaker 3: laughed at this because and I thought maybe you could

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Speaker 3: speak to it. You were actually an NFL cheerleader, not

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Speaker 3: in high school, but for the San Francisco forty nine.

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Speaker 1: Ers asert photo here.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, But I think that is very I thought,

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Speaker 3: as your daughter, oh my gosh, that is so counter

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Speaker 3: to how you have talked about your actual experience in

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Speaker 3: high school. And I just I wanted to hear your

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Speaker 3: if that line stood out to you in the way

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Speaker 3: that stood out to me.

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Speaker 2: It did not, But I do understand what you're saying,

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Speaker 2: and I feel like a couple of things. I mean,

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Speaker 2: there's no reason we don't have there's no reason to

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Speaker 2: go in order of the episode, really, but I think

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Speaker 2: this was a very resonating area between Susan and Edie,

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Speaker 2: and for me, it was a couple of reasons. One

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Speaker 2: I thought people would really relate.

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Speaker 6: I did.

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Speaker 2: And I think this is what you're alluding to, Emerson,

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Speaker 2: is this idea of so Edie says to Susan, we

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Speaker 2: never outgrow high school, that who you are in high

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Speaker 2: school is who you continue to be, and that in

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Speaker 2: high school, she assumes that Susan was the cheerleader and

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Speaker 2: popular and everybody's friend, and that Edie was more of

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Speaker 2: like the bad girl who was smoking and getting into trouble.

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Speaker 2: And these two groups of people do never co mingle

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Speaker 2: and even past high school and on into life, they

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Speaker 2: never would either. And that's the sort of conceit that

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Speaker 2: Edie puts out there. At the same time, she all

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Speaker 2: So is taking Susan up to this remote lake to

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Speaker 2: spread what Edi expresses as her best friend, missus Hooper's ashes,

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Speaker 2: And I have a personal experience with spreading someone's ashes,

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Speaker 2: So I wanted to share and discuss like both of

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Speaker 2: those things. So to answer your question about I mean,

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Speaker 2: and I'm interested to see what you guys think. I

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Speaker 2: think that Edie is sort of right that people in

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Speaker 2: a way don't outgrow their high school position. I think.

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Speaker 2: But it's sort of like I said to you earlier,

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Speaker 2: I would hope that they would. I would hope that

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Speaker 2: I did, and I would hope that people would let them.

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Speaker 2: And I think these things are they're different. Like your

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Speaker 2: ability to outgrow your high school self, I think is

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Speaker 2: very accessible. If you do the work, I think you

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Speaker 2: can evolve into a better, more or just broad better

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Speaker 2: person than most of us were in high school because

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Speaker 2: we didn't know anything. But sometimes people don't want to

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Speaker 2: let you. And it is a very interesting thing. Was

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Speaker 2: I was on the dance team in high school, and

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Speaker 2: I was.

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Speaker 3: A cheerleader adjacent it.

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Speaker 2: Is, and I was captain of the dance team seconds.

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Speaker 6: But you know, I look at that.

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Speaker 2: And I think of it as the responsibility it held.

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Speaker 2: And if you're really challenging me to go deep on,

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Speaker 2: what is that journey? And it's actually kind of painful.

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Speaker 2: I don't really like in hindsight that I feel like

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Speaker 2: I've held positions of responsibility that I either didn't want

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Speaker 2: or wasn't ready for. And in my high school, I

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Speaker 2: was on this drill team and I was the captain.

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Speaker 2: But like California at the time, it was like Prop

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Speaker 2: thirteen and public school has lost all their tax money,

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Speaker 2: so they fired our advisor. Like we didn't have college advisors,

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Speaker 2: we didn't have. All these people lost their jobs, so

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Speaker 2: I didn't have an adult supervisor over the drill team supporting.

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Speaker 2: So I was in this position as a seventeen year

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Speaker 2: old being like telling girls what to do, and it

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Speaker 2: was my position to try to carry that out to

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Speaker 2: the best of my ability to have a drill team

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Speaker 2: that could compete against other schools, and we often won.

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Speaker 2: We were not we were the featherets, and we were

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Speaker 2: known for winning the act nut. But I don't think

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Speaker 2: I wanted it. I just got it, you know. And

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Speaker 2: I think about my role as an only child in

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Speaker 2: a pretty problematic household of parents fighting and trying to

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Speaker 2: like make the peace and create an environment that would

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Speaker 2: be better for all of us, which also was not

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Speaker 2: my job. And if I think about it, I just

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Speaker 2: feel like maybe that I end up in that position

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Speaker 2: where I and I wonder as it applies to Susan.

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Speaker 2: I don't know that somebody who I think of her

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Speaker 2: character as as somebody who actually things don't necessarily go

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Speaker 2: well for and she isn't always like the winner of

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Speaker 2: the best guy, you know, and her love life doesn't

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Speaker 2: always work out, and she doesn't seem powerful to me.

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Speaker 6: I mean, this is my view in hindsight twenty years later.

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure I was thinking these.

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Speaker 2: Things when I was playing it, but I think look

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Speaker 2: at the two of them, and I think of Edie

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Speaker 2: as going through the world and getting what she wants. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: And I think of confidently, and I think of Susan not.

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Speaker 3: And it's so interesting because I think I can see

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Speaker 3: Edie's I think I am thinking about my physician in

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Speaker 3: high school, which I don't know if I still occupied today,

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Speaker 3: but in some ways maybe I do. I was always

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Speaker 3: a very floater in high school, Like I floated between

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Speaker 3: a lot of different social groups. I was friends with

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Speaker 3: the popular kids. I would get invited to parties, but

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Speaker 3: I didn't necessarily like sit with them at lunch or

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Speaker 3: go back to their houses after school or hang out

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Speaker 3: with them all the time. I was really integrated into

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Speaker 3: the musical theater scene, which my school was much more

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Speaker 3: of an athletic school, so we had a very small

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Speaker 3: kind of nerdy.

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Speaker 1: But arguably the best group to be around.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I would argue that we had a very

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Speaker 3: small nerdy group there. I was also one of the

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Speaker 3: editors of our lip magazine, so that was also its

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Speaker 3: other kind of subset. And I floated between all of

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Speaker 3: these different social groups in a way that was great

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Speaker 3: but also kind of left me fundamentally on my own.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 3: I had connections to a lot of people, but not like, oh,

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Speaker 3: I I the bell rings for lunch, I know exactly

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Speaker 3: what table I'm going to to sit at. Oftentimes I

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Speaker 3: actually went to my English teachers classroom and ate lunch

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Speaker 3: in his classroom, which.

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Speaker 6: I think that says a lot about who you are now.

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Speaker 3: It does say, yeah, and I do.

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Speaker 2: Think of you as somebody who everyone likes and your

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Speaker 2: friends with everyone, Well.

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Speaker 3: Thank you. And I love people and they're my species

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Speaker 3: and I like to be friends with them. But I

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Speaker 3: think I now I kind of while I was definitely

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Speaker 3: not like the bad girl smoking cigarette of God, I

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Speaker 3: do not smoke cigarets in Edie's perspective, but I was

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Speaker 3: a little bit more of a loner the way that

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Speaker 3: she is, and I can see her perspective that you're

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Speaker 3: viewing is very powerful. I think some of people who

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Speaker 3: know me might view me as powerfully kind of going

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Speaker 3: from thing to thing in my life, there is sometimes

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Speaker 3: a fundamental aloneness in that, like, yes, I go after

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Speaker 3: the things that I want, but I go after them alone,

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Speaker 3: and I take care of them myself alone. And so

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Speaker 3: for Edie, looking at someone like Susan, who we maybe

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Speaker 3: can view as potentially a more character, but who does

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Speaker 3: sort of seamlessly fall into the community of the other

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Speaker 3: women on her block, even if it's while they're consoling

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Speaker 3: her for the various mishaps going on in her life,

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Speaker 3: she sort of has a place that I could imagine

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Speaker 3: Edie looking at and envying because Edie doesn't necessarily have

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Speaker 3: you know, the same seat at the high school lunch

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Speaker 3: table that community.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, And I think it's really so speaking as someone

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Speaker 5: who went to high school on the back lot of

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Speaker 5: Universal Studios and I was the only one there, and

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Speaker 5: my studio teacher I.

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Speaker 3: Did it was also Drew Barrymore's studio teacher, Yes.

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Speaker 5: Who was also Drew Verrymore's childhood studio teacher for a

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Speaker 5: lot of her career. I didn't have any sort of

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Speaker 5: tent poles community of this is where the cool kids sit,

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Speaker 5: this is where the class clowns are, this is the

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Speaker 5: you know, artsy people that I mean. It was just

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Speaker 5: me and I sort of kind of fit, I would say,

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Speaker 5: in a lot of those different boxes. But I will

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Speaker 5: say the other thing that I thought about based on

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Speaker 5: this particular storyline was how hard it is to make

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Speaker 5: friends as an adult.

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Speaker 1: And I think a lot of people relate to that.

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Speaker 5: I think, you know, you have these built in opportunities

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Speaker 5: for friendship when you're a child growing up, because you

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Speaker 5: have school, and you have sports, and you have you know,

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Speaker 5: all different kinds.

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Speaker 1: Of things clubs.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, and you're already batched together with kids in your

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Speaker 5: same age range and maybe some of your same interests

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Speaker 5: if you're exploring hobbies or extracurriculars. But when you're an adult,

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Speaker 5: you know it's much harder and you don't always the

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Speaker 5: people you interact with on a daily basis are For

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Speaker 5: a lot of people, the people they work with and

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Speaker 5: their commonalities might be work related, but it doesn't necessarily

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Speaker 5: mean they vibe outside of that. And I remember when

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Speaker 5: I moved back to New York after Desperate Housewives ended,

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Speaker 5: and I was excited to go back to where I

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Speaker 5: grew up and just kind of get out of LA

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Speaker 5: for a little while and explore being in my mid

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Speaker 5: twenties in New York City.

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Speaker 1: I had had a lot of childhood.

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Speaker 5: Friends in New York City, but a lot of them

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Speaker 5: had since grown up, been moved and started new things,

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Speaker 5: And so I did, for the first time in my life,

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Speaker 5: feel like I had to actively go out and seek

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Speaker 5: new friendships as a mid twenty something, and I remember

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Speaker 5: really feeling like, this is hard, This is hard. I

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Speaker 5: even had a moment in a coffee shop once where

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Speaker 5: I was like desperately trying to bond with someone that

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Speaker 5: I thought seemed cool, and I was just trying to

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Speaker 5: It felt like I was like flirting because I was

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Speaker 5: trying to be witty and I was trying to be

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Speaker 5: charming over something about like the stir sticks or something

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Speaker 5: so uninteresting. But I wanted so badly for her to

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Speaker 5: see my sense of humor or for her to see

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Speaker 5: And then what did I think was going to happen?

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Speaker 1: That I was going to be like, hey, do you

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Speaker 1: want to take my number and hang out?

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Speaker 5: Like I didn't even know where to go with it,

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Speaker 5: but I felt this desire because.

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Speaker 1: She seemed cool. I don't even remember why, and I

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Speaker 1: just thought, this is how you do this? How else

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Speaker 1: do you do it?

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Speaker 2: I think you're making though really good point. And as

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Speaker 2: a single woman for like decades, it has been something

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Speaker 2: that I have thought about a lot, investing in new friendships,

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Speaker 2: investing in friendships with other single women, because you know,

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Speaker 2: my married friends, most of my friends are long term married,

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Speaker 2: most of my closest friends, and while they make themselves

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Speaker 2: available to me and we do things all the time,

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Speaker 2: they still have their husbands and families are always going

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Speaker 2: to be their first priority. And so in finding single

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Speaker 2: women that were older that were forty to fifty now

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Speaker 2: sixty years old, that I could interact with. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 2: a conscious effortful thing. But I would recommend to anyone

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Speaker 2: of any age get out of your house, do things

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Speaker 2: that you're interested in, and don't be afraid to introduce

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Speaker 2: yourself to people.

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Speaker 6: Don't be I hear prof G. Do you you listen

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Speaker 6: to him?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I hear him talk about this in regards to

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Speaker 2: young men like that, they just don't have the confidence.

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Speaker 2: And I would just encourage anyone listening to get out

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Speaker 2: of their comfort zone, meet other people, find common interests,

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Speaker 2: have community with actual humans in person.

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Speaker 6: I think it's really good for your.

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Speaker 5: Life, and invite the invite the person to the poker game.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I was gonna say, I am so the proponent.

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Speaker 3: I have totally made some friendships by talking to people

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Speaker 3: in coffee shops who later have gone to my friends

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Speaker 3: and then like, I don't know if she was flirting

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Speaker 3: with me or she wants to be friends. Well I

387
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Speaker 3: did want to be friends. But I was gonna say

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Speaker 3: in Edie's case, I actually think it makes sense that

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Speaker 3: Edie and Susan are paired up, and often they're sort

390
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Speaker 3: of paired up in scenes as adversaries, but they are

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Speaker 3: the two single women on Mysteria Lane and Edie just

392
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Speaker 3: wants to be invited to the poker game. And so

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Speaker 3: if you can, you know, find someone who's also single

394
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Speaker 3: who will accidentally burn down your house and then feel

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Speaker 3: so guilty about it that they for the rest of

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Speaker 3: your they invite you to a pogram after hosing down

397
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Speaker 3: human remains off of you on your lawn, which I

398
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Speaker 3: have to say, that scene where Edie shoots you down

399
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Speaker 3: with the hose yeh is so funny. And I want

400
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Speaker 3: to circle back to your.

401
00:20:17,119 --> 00:20:20,520
Speaker 2: The memories of Ashes, So my memories are loose, and

402
00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:22,840
Speaker 2: again I think I've said this kind of thing before.

403
00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:27,960
Speaker 2: What I remember, in a very general way is that

404
00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:31,200
Speaker 2: everyone cared that those scenes were good.

405
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Speaker 6: Do you know what I mean?

406
00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:33,720
Speaker 1: Like they felt like worthy.

407
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, they felt like worthy moments. And I feel like

408
00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:39,719
Speaker 2: I don't have specifics, unfortunately, but I just feel like,

409
00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:45,520
Speaker 2: I mean, Nicolette was great, and I will again make

410
00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:48,120
Speaker 2: a bid for I think they missed the boat on

411
00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:52,560
Speaker 2: the Nicolette, I mean, on the Edie Susan storyline, because

412
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Speaker 2: as you're pointing out, they were the only two single people.

413
00:20:56,280 --> 00:20:59,040
Speaker 2: I think it would have been an interesting show and

414
00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:02,680
Speaker 2: maybe it still is as a spin off. To see

415
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:05,439
Speaker 2: two people that seem very like they would not like

416
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:07,480
Speaker 2: each other and they would have nothing in common, like

417
00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:10,520
Speaker 2: slowly grow that friendship into a thing where they need

418
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:12,960
Speaker 2: each other. Like that would have been something I would

419
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Speaker 2: have liked to see.

420
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Speaker 3: And I'm lobbying for the Susan Edie spin off.

421
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Speaker 2: Right, So I don't think we do really see that

422
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,040
Speaker 2: in the show. But like I don't remember any of

423
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Speaker 2: the episodes. I mean, that's another thing that comes up.

424
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Speaker 2: I don't know if it's coming up for you, Andrea.

425
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Speaker 2: I watched this thing and I'm like, I don't remember

426
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Speaker 2: any of this. It's so great that and if I

427
00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:40,080
Speaker 2: do remember it, like the scene with Cody where well,

428
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:43,520
Speaker 2: we'll come back. But I was sticking with this scene

429
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Speaker 2: and when she hosed me off from on the lawn,

430
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Speaker 2: like I have some buried memory of just being.

431
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Speaker 6: Like, oh my god, this is happening. She's gonna squirt

432
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Speaker 6: me with that hose.

433
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Speaker 1: But like I have only done that once.

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Speaker 5: I probably, I mean, they would have taken way too

435
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Speaker 5: long to dry you off and need it.

436
00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:01,960
Speaker 1: We probably did it all nailed it on take one.

437
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Speaker 2: But what I noticed, because I wouldn't have seen this

438
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Speaker 2: when we were shooting it. She goes behind me, Nicolett

439
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:14,760
Speaker 2: goes behind me, and she's got the most glorious like smile,

440
00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:20,360
Speaker 2: you know, like just chest your cat grin. I mean,

441
00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:23,760
Speaker 2: it's so but I would never have seen that, you know.

442
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:27,159
Speaker 2: And I just I love, I really love them together

443
00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:30,240
Speaker 2: on screen. And I think the Eedy character is incredibly

444
00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:33,400
Speaker 2: powerful and the way Nicholette does is amazing. When Catherine

445
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:37,840
Speaker 2: Jusin died, who played Missus Missus McCluskey, who were about

446
00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:41,440
Speaker 2: to have introduced, I think it's like one or two

447
00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:44,359
Speaker 2: more episodes, So I'm excited for that because she's so great.

448
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:49,840
Speaker 2: Oh she's amazing, so great. So she and I were

449
00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:56,240
Speaker 2: friends and so much so that I after she died.

450
00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:58,200
Speaker 4: Her.

451
00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:02,440
Speaker 2: Son and daughter in law came to me and said,

452
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:04,119
Speaker 2: we were just talking about what are you going to

453
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,600
Speaker 2: do with her ashes? And I think Emerson and I

454
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:08,840
Speaker 2: were getting ready to take one of our epic trips

455
00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 2: to Europe, yeah, which I mean we traveled a lot

456
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:14,600
Speaker 2: in the summers during when she was in high school,

457
00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 2: going to different restaurants, and that was like our thing,

458
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:23,080
Speaker 2: to take these big vacations. And I said, should I

459
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:27,080
Speaker 2: take some of her ashes and spread them around the world.

460
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:32,040
Speaker 2: And they said that Catherine would have loved nothing more

461
00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:35,480
Speaker 2: than being everywhere in the world, Like that would have

462
00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:39,760
Speaker 2: been her favorite thing to know that she was everywhere.

463
00:23:40,040 --> 00:23:44,480
Speaker 2: So I actually brought some pictures, but like the behind

464
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:45,280
Speaker 2: the scenes, I was.

465
00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:47,040
Speaker 3: Going to say, the one thing that she would have

466
00:23:47,080 --> 00:23:50,280
Speaker 3: actually loved more than being everywhere in the world would

467
00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:55,399
Speaker 3: have been seeing the absolute hannish it induced it to

468
00:23:55,440 --> 00:23:57,800
Speaker 3: spread the ashes around the world.

469
00:23:57,840 --> 00:23:59,080
Speaker 6: Was big responsibility.

470
00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 3: And more than that, my mom is such a rule

471
00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 3: follower right about that. You know, she hears, oh, you can't,

472
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:07,560
Speaker 3: you know, technically without a permit spread someone's ashes in

473
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:09,760
Speaker 3: the ocean, and you know, it's like a tablespoon of

474
00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:12,919
Speaker 3: ashes if that. And we are on a boat and

475
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:15,400
Speaker 3: she's like with the bag of ashes behind her back,

476
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 3: like waddling to the back of the boat, looking side

477
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:20,159
Speaker 3: to side, making sure, and then like get go go

478
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:21,919
Speaker 3: on the ocean, Go on the ocean. And then we'd be,

479
00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:24,440
Speaker 3: you know, at some beautiful cathedral and we'd be out

480
00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:28,040
Speaker 3: in here gardens and she'd like waddle over and be like, okay, Emerson,

481
00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:29,000
Speaker 3: make sure no one's looking.

482
00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:29,560
Speaker 6: And then she like.

483
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:32,800
Speaker 3: Thrown her shoulder and run away, and I think she

484
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:34,520
Speaker 3: would have gotten a real kick out.

485
00:24:34,359 --> 00:24:35,240
Speaker 6: Of here, right, she would have.

486
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:38,280
Speaker 2: Emerson actually videoed me. I'm like, I do this whole

487
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:41,479
Speaker 2: thing where I tell the story about why her family

488
00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:44,240
Speaker 2: gave me the ashes and that Catherine would have loved this,

489
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:46,520
Speaker 2: and so like, I'm gonna swim out into the ocean

490
00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:48,720
Speaker 2: with this amount of ashes, and she's gonna be here,

491
00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:51,080
Speaker 2: and so I like swim out and I'm about to

492
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:53,320
Speaker 2: like and we are literally like in the middle of

493
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:55,000
Speaker 2: note like a boat has dropped us off on some

494
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:57,159
Speaker 2: private beach and we're in the middle, and I'm like

495
00:24:57,200 --> 00:25:04,640
Speaker 2: about to put the ashes, and this god in a snorkel,

496
00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:08,959
Speaker 2: like a creepy FBI spy snorkel, and I'm like, I

497
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:12,120
Speaker 2: start laughing. I of course don't do it, because now

498
00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:17,040
Speaker 2: there's a witness, like an arbitrary s lone snorkling man

499
00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:20,439
Speaker 2: in the middle of the Mediterranean. And then so we

500
00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:23,560
Speaker 2: cut the video, the snorkeling guy goes away. We're back

501
00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:25,919
Speaker 2: to having the beach by ourselves, and I tell the

502
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:28,600
Speaker 2: story in the video about how I think Catherine would

503
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:33,879
Speaker 2: have liked that moment of humiliation for me of more

504
00:25:33,960 --> 00:25:38,080
Speaker 2: than even what we were doing. And so so that

505
00:25:38,240 --> 00:25:41,679
Speaker 2: is the only person's ashes I have ever spread. My

506
00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:44,639
Speaker 2: mom has talked to me about me wanting me to

507
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:48,399
Speaker 2: spread her ashes. If anybody's ever been to the Laguna Montage,

508
00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:50,040
Speaker 2: it's a beautiful hotel.

509
00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:50,639
Speaker 6: Have they have?

510
00:25:51,040 --> 00:25:53,359
Speaker 2: It has a walk, it's it has a walk along

511
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:56,480
Speaker 2: the ocean with you know, plants and flowers, and Grandma

512
00:25:56,960 --> 00:25:59,840
Speaker 2: wants her ashes and I'm like, Okay, I'll do that.

513
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:02,280
Speaker 2: It's probably wasted, but Mom, I'll do that.

514
00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:05,040
Speaker 3: Well, that's going to be way more public than the Mediterranean,

515
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:16,639
Speaker 3: that's too. Speaking of being arrested, I do I was

516
00:26:16,680 --> 00:26:20,560
Speaker 3: really taken with Gabby and Carlos's storyline in this episode

517
00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:23,800
Speaker 3: of I Mean for a host of reasons. Carlos returns,

518
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:26,720
Speaker 3: he has a fantastic anklet, he's on house arrest. We

519
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 3: get some really great comedy which I think has actually

520
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,920
Speaker 3: been turned into a meme that my friends will sometimes

521
00:26:32,920 --> 00:26:36,000
Speaker 3: send around of Gabby sitting on the other side of

522
00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:39,439
Speaker 3: the curb eating the fried chicken and the French fries

523
00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:43,480
Speaker 3: out of the bucket while Carlos is suffering with.

524
00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:44,360
Speaker 6: His alarm.

525
00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:48,879
Speaker 5: Going on those fences that they can't go past.

526
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:52,399
Speaker 3: So sad, but it's also not sad because Carlos is

527
00:26:52,440 --> 00:26:57,200
Speaker 3: a bad man in this episode and honestly in previous episodes. Also,

528
00:26:57,320 --> 00:27:01,600
Speaker 3: I really struggle with Carlos's character because he decides that

529
00:27:01,680 --> 00:27:03,600
Speaker 3: he wants Gabby to have a baby, despite her saying

530
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:06,560
Speaker 3: numerous times that her uterus is not up for debate,

531
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:12,159
Speaker 3: and again things that feel politically timely today. Man, he

532
00:27:12,359 --> 00:27:14,919
Speaker 3: decides he's going to tamper with her birth control, so

533
00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:21,800
Speaker 3: she's taking Placebo pills. This brought up a few different

534
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:25,399
Speaker 3: macro questions for me. I mean, obviously, this feels as

535
00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:30,560
Speaker 3: a woman deeply violating and like, I mean, dare I

536
00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:34,320
Speaker 3: go as far as saying a form of assault, you know,

537
00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:39,800
Speaker 3: to have someone get pregnant against their will by tampering

538
00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:43,040
Speaker 3: with their medication. But it also brought up like two

539
00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:45,879
Speaker 3: kind of bigger themes for me that I was thinking

540
00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:52,000
Speaker 3: about in this episode. One is staying with your partner

541
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:57,720
Speaker 3: through tough times. The conundrum that Gabby is faced with

542
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:03,119
Speaker 3: when Carlos returned Burns on house arrest, going to jail

543
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:07,720
Speaker 3: kind of looming potentially or just be having this limited

544
00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:09,240
Speaker 3: lifestyle where he's stuck.

545
00:28:09,040 --> 00:28:11,760
Speaker 2: In his house and you could also argue that bri

546
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:15,720
Speaker 2: and Rex are you know, like I know personally people

547
00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:20,159
Speaker 2: who have survived affairs, you know, in real life. So

548
00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:23,960
Speaker 2: I mean it's just another humpin in a relationship to

549
00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:24,520
Speaker 2: get over.

550
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

551
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 3: And then this kind of balance of confessing and asking

552
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:31,920
Speaker 3: for forgiveness. I mean, Carlos is not at the point

553
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:35,399
Speaker 3: yet of confessing what he's doing or asking for forgiveness.

554
00:28:35,640 --> 00:28:38,600
Speaker 3: But you see Susan confessing to Edie. You also see

555
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:42,360
Speaker 3: Lynette unintentionally being forced to confess that she's been lying

556
00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:46,840
Speaker 3: about her kid having a terminal illness and asking She

557
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:49,080
Speaker 3: doesn't really ask for forgiveness. She says, I'm never going

558
00:28:49,120 --> 00:28:50,840
Speaker 3: back to that ya studio.

559
00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:52,480
Speaker 1: And does she switches to at home yoga?

560
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:56,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, and she probably shouldn't. But brought up two questions

561
00:28:56,680 --> 00:29:00,080
Speaker 3: for me. One, have either of you ever had a

562
00:29:00,120 --> 00:29:03,800
Speaker 3: lie that has spiraled out of control that you've either

563
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:06,440
Speaker 3: you know, gotten away with until this podcast? Where can

564
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:11,240
Speaker 3: you tell me or gotten caught and had to confess for?

565
00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:14,920
Speaker 3: And Two, where do you fall on the pros and

566
00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:18,280
Speaker 3: cons of toughing it out when the person that you

567
00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 3: are committed to or even you know that could be

568
00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:22,560
Speaker 3: a friendship commitment. I know in this case we're looking

569
00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:26,920
Speaker 3: at relationships and marriage types of commitments, you know, falls

570
00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:29,280
Speaker 3: on a time that really makes them not maybe be

571
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,400
Speaker 3: their best and most vibrant self.

572
00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:34,840
Speaker 5: Well to your second question, I would say grounds for

573
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 5: divorce are entirely permissible when someone is tampering with one's

574
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,880
Speaker 5: birth control. I agree, So I think that's a tough

575
00:29:41,920 --> 00:29:45,840
Speaker 5: it out type of dynamic. I also agreed that I

576
00:29:45,880 --> 00:29:49,080
Speaker 5: didn't remember that storyline, and we've talked a little bit

577
00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:53,479
Speaker 5: about how much more problematic Carlos is in this rewatch

578
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:56,240
Speaker 5: to all of us or to Emerson for your first time.

579
00:29:56,280 --> 00:30:01,320
Speaker 5: But this behavior is just probably the worst thing that's happened,

580
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:05,840
Speaker 5: and I'm curious to see where that goes. I do

581
00:30:05,960 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 5: think that the idea of sticking it out is one.

582
00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:12,440
Speaker 1: That has evolved a lot over the years.

583
00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:15,400
Speaker 5: I think when I look at relationships of people in

584
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:18,680
Speaker 5: my life that are older, their idea of sticking it

585
00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:23,240
Speaker 5: out was because in a marriage format anyway, was I

586
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:26,120
Speaker 5: made a commitment. This is what marriage is. There's no

587
00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,400
Speaker 5: you can't go back on that commitment. It's sacred and

588
00:30:29,440 --> 00:30:32,000
Speaker 5: it doesn't matter. I have to stay right. The idea

589
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 5: of I have to stay. I don't think that rule

590
00:30:36,240 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 5: is really as strict for people of my generation and

591
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:46,120
Speaker 5: future generations. And sometimes I think maybe we're getting too

592
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:48,320
Speaker 5: loose with it, where it's like the first sign of

593
00:30:48,320 --> 00:30:49,120
Speaker 5: a bump and.

594
00:30:49,280 --> 00:30:51,440
Speaker 1: We're out because we feel like life's too short.

595
00:30:51,520 --> 00:30:55,000
Speaker 5: And I don't want to feel like I'm, you know,

596
00:30:56,280 --> 00:30:59,000
Speaker 5: on home arrest because of something that this person did.

597
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:01,480
Speaker 5: I don't have to be changed to this person who

598
00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:03,800
Speaker 5: made a mistake. And so I think it's like a living,

599
00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:10,680
Speaker 5: breathing thing. For your other question, I am so uncomfortable

600
00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 5: with lying. I really am a bad, bad, bad liar,

601
00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:17,800
Speaker 5: and I'm almost a chronic truth teller in a way

602
00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:21,360
Speaker 5: that's also not great. I've definitely had times in my

603
00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:25,360
Speaker 5: life where I've made the decision to overshare in the

604
00:31:26,680 --> 00:31:32,200
Speaker 5: attempt to garner someone's respect and trust and for them

605
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:35,600
Speaker 5: to feel like, wow, well she's so transparent that you know,

606
00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:38,440
Speaker 5: I have to give her credit for that or something.

607
00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:41,360
Speaker 5: And so if I fall anywhere, I almost fall on

608
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:43,880
Speaker 5: striving to be so honest that sometimes I think I

609
00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 5: could hold that back. But I don't think I could

610
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 5: live with a lie that just kept spiraling out. I

611
00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:51,080
Speaker 5: would come clean too soon.

612
00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:55,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, I'm not going to

613
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:58,840
Speaker 2: pull it anna up to think that I've never lied

614
00:31:58,920 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 2: about anything. So while I don't think I want to

615
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 2: discuss like the couple of untruths that maybe played out

616
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:09,200
Speaker 2: when I was younger, because like I said, I'm not

617
00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:14,240
Speaker 2: going to say those things never happened at this point

618
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 2: in my life, I agree with you, like I just

619
00:32:17,840 --> 00:32:21,560
Speaker 2: can't get caught up in not telling the truth and

620
00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:25,040
Speaker 2: not because there's been something that was went wrong, just

621
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:29,120
Speaker 2: because it's too much energy, Like I just it's too

622
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:29,840
Speaker 2: much energy.

623
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:33,120
Speaker 3: I agree. I mean, I think we see these characters,

624
00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:37,760
Speaker 3: you know, the lengths to which Paul is going to

625
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:40,440
Speaker 3: cover up whatever lie is happening there, the lengths to

626
00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:43,200
Speaker 3: which Rex has gone to cover up his affair, landing

627
00:32:43,240 --> 00:32:47,040
Speaker 3: him in the hospital with a heart attack, The lengths

628
00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:50,280
Speaker 3: which Susan goes, which you know, ultimately she's not an

629
00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:54,360
Speaker 3: incredible liar, which I think is a good trait to.

630
00:32:53,880 --> 00:32:54,480
Speaker 1: Be bad at it.

631
00:32:54,600 --> 00:32:56,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's a good trait, and I do

632
00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:59,200
Speaker 3: think you're right. I think it takes a lot of

633
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:04,600
Speaker 3: energy time to then it as things spiral, continue to

634
00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:08,240
Speaker 3: cover your tracks, and ultimately that just hurts the person

635
00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:10,560
Speaker 3: who's telling the lie, even if the lie starts from

636
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:13,240
Speaker 3: a place of trying to protect other people or other

637
00:33:13,240 --> 00:33:18,840
Speaker 3: people's feelings. Ultimately, I think it it hurts the people

638
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:19,320
Speaker 3: around you.

639
00:33:19,520 --> 00:33:21,480
Speaker 5: And I did just a thought that just occurred to

640
00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:23,840
Speaker 5: me while we were talking about this particular scene and

641
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:27,520
Speaker 5: Carlos calling the pharmacy to man, you know, to get

642
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:30,760
Speaker 5: Gabby's birth control refilled and delivered.

643
00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:30,760
Speaker 6: To the house.

644
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:33,040
Speaker 5: I'm wondering if it's the same pharmacist. I'm wondering if

645
00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:34,400
Speaker 5: he was on the film with George.

646
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:36,120
Speaker 3: Oh, George pharmacist.

647
00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:37,640
Speaker 6: Oh, it's just that one guy.

648
00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:38,960
Speaker 1: One guy.

649
00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:40,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I think that's how it is that

650
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:42,600
Speaker 3: the CVS I go to, because it takes for effort,

651
00:33:42,680 --> 00:33:44,800
Speaker 3: there's just one pharmacist back there.

652
00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:47,960
Speaker 2: I will say, in terms of getting over bumps, the

653
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:51,480
Speaker 2: one thing that I have reflected on as again being

654
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:56,400
Speaker 2: single since basically I was forty, that I will say

655
00:33:56,520 --> 00:34:00,960
Speaker 2: to older friends of mine that are considering getting divorced

656
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 2: that and it doesn't mean that I'm not sorry in

657
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:06,840
Speaker 2: any way that I got divorced. And I'm thrilled for

658
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:10,680
Speaker 2: your dad with his current situation. He's been married longer

659
00:34:10,719 --> 00:34:13,960
Speaker 2: than he was married to me. It has nothing to

660
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:16,840
Speaker 2: do with a reflection of like, oh, that shouldn't have

661
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:20,560
Speaker 2: gone that way. But I do recommend to my friends

662
00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:26,160
Speaker 2: who are getting divorced to not live in a fantasy

663
00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:28,520
Speaker 2: that somehow you're going to get divorced and then you're

664
00:34:28,560 --> 00:34:31,480
Speaker 2: just going to like meet the perfect person that doesn't

665
00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:33,840
Speaker 2: challenge you in any way and it's just all going

666
00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:36,640
Speaker 2: to be wonderful and easy, because that's the way it

667
00:34:36,680 --> 00:34:37,480
Speaker 2: was always meant to be.

668
00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:40,279
Speaker 6: Like, if you need to get out for.

669
00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:43,960
Speaker 2: A number of reasons, some more serious than others, then

670
00:34:44,120 --> 00:34:47,520
Speaker 2: do it, But don't do it thinking there's going to

671
00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:47,799
Speaker 2: be a.

672
00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:49,160
Speaker 6: Savior on the other side.

673
00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:54,120
Speaker 2: Like do it and understand that you may be living

674
00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:58,080
Speaker 2: out your life as a single person in a I

675
00:34:58,080 --> 00:35:00,319
Speaker 2: think I live in a very robust way. I'm not

676
00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:03,680
Speaker 2: living out in longing or desire. Not to say I

677
00:35:03,680 --> 00:35:07,440
Speaker 2: wouldn't welcome a relationship if it could happened, but like

678
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:13,400
Speaker 2: it just I think women I think arrive in their

679
00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:16,399
Speaker 2: forties and sometimes they feel empowered. They feel like I'm

680
00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:19,160
Speaker 2: done putting up with this shit, Like I can take

681
00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:22,000
Speaker 2: care of myself. Like a lot of things that I

682
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:27,240
Speaker 2: felt or that I agree with, but it just don't

683
00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:31,399
Speaker 2: do it without having really reflected on who you are,

684
00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:35,200
Speaker 2: your honest part in what is wrong with your current relationship,

685
00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:37,560
Speaker 2: like really try to be honest with yourself.

686
00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 1: It makes me that great advice.

687
00:35:39,200 --> 00:35:41,319
Speaker 3: It makes me think actually of this Joni Mitchell quote,

688
00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:43,680
Speaker 3: this great Joni Mitchell quote that I heard. She was

689
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:45,839
Speaker 3: talking about relationships. This was many years ago, but it's

690
00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:49,760
Speaker 3: really stayed with me. And she says, if you want

691
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:53,279
Speaker 3: endless repetition, date a lot of people. If you want

692
00:35:53,360 --> 00:35:57,640
Speaker 3: endless variety, stay with one. And this idea that when

693
00:35:57,640 --> 00:36:00,200
Speaker 3: you are dating initially, when you start to date, when

694
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:02,719
Speaker 3: you're in those early stages of a relationship, you run

695
00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:05,880
Speaker 3: all your best material. You know, you tell your funniest stories,

696
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:09,359
Speaker 3: and you're the most charming version of your highlight reel. Yeah,

697
00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:12,160
Speaker 3: it's your highlight reel. And it's really you falling in

698
00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:15,279
Speaker 3: love with yourself through someone falling in love with all

699
00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:18,480
Speaker 3: the best qualities of you. And if you're with someone

700
00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:21,160
Speaker 3: for a long time, you know inevitably you were going

701
00:36:21,239 --> 00:36:22,880
Speaker 3: to look like an asshole to them at some point

702
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:25,040
Speaker 3: they are going to look like an asshole to you.

703
00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 3: But navigating through she says, and I agree, like navigating

704
00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:35,600
Speaker 3: through those spaces of turmoil and of disillusionment and then

705
00:36:35,760 --> 00:36:38,960
Speaker 3: still knowing each other. Back to the idea of how

706
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:40,400
Speaker 3: how do you live your life in a way that

707
00:36:40,440 --> 00:36:44,360
Speaker 3: you're truly known by the people around you That ultimately

708
00:36:45,400 --> 00:36:48,840
Speaker 3: creates a space that is ever evolving and more padded

709
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:53,120
Speaker 3: and more safe and and in her opinion, can you

710
00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:55,280
Speaker 3: know sustain you for a lifetime.

711
00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:59,680
Speaker 2: I I got to see her at the Hollywood, But

712
00:36:59,719 --> 00:37:02,160
Speaker 2: can I jump to the gun range?

713
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:02,600
Speaker 6: Sure?

714
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:03,160
Speaker 3: Please?

715
00:37:03,320 --> 00:37:05,480
Speaker 6: Because so Brie.

716
00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:09,120
Speaker 2: In this episode is very much still struggling with if

717
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:12,160
Speaker 2: she should stay with Rex, and she's you know, they're

718
00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 2: they're in a horrible They're still in their horrible divorce,

719
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:18,840
Speaker 2: anger and resentment and all of that. And she's still

720
00:37:18,960 --> 00:37:23,120
Speaker 2: monking around with dating the wacky, wacky pharmacist George. And

721
00:37:23,160 --> 00:37:27,520
Speaker 2: he buys her this antique gun, which she gets very

722
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:32,120
Speaker 2: excited about and in a public park, waving it around

723
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:33,200
Speaker 2: in a public park.

724
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:36,120
Speaker 3: I love the bait and switch of He gives her

725
00:37:36,120 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 3: this box that looks like, Oh, is it going to

726
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:39,600
Speaker 3: be chocolates? Is it going to be a bracelet? She goes, Oh,

727
00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:41,200
Speaker 3: she looks at it before we see what it is.

728
00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 3: It's like, oh, George, this is so beautiful. This means

729
00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 3: so much to me. And then we see and it's

730
00:37:46,800 --> 00:37:49,879
Speaker 3: a gun, which also, yeah, whoa. She takes the gun

731
00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:51,759
Speaker 3: out in the park and people don't scatter it.

732
00:37:52,840 --> 00:37:57,520
Speaker 5: She's waving it around, sitting on a little picnic blanket.

733
00:37:57,560 --> 00:37:58,400
Speaker 1: It's madness.

734
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 2: But anyway, they go to the gun range to use it,

735
00:38:02,120 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 2: and she's trying to teach George how and then he

736
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:08,200
Speaker 2: tries to kiss her and she jerks away and then

737
00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:11,440
Speaker 2: he shoots off his toe. But which you know, as

738
00:38:11,640 --> 00:38:15,080
Speaker 2: as as you does as you do. But has have

739
00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:17,080
Speaker 2: you guys been to a gun rate because I have,

740
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:18,360
Speaker 2: and I kind of wanted to tell.

741
00:38:18,200 --> 00:38:20,600
Speaker 5: You I have not, but I did play a cop

742
00:38:20,640 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 5: in a lifetime movie and I had to learn how

743
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:23,759
Speaker 5: to properly hold a gun.

744
00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:27,000
Speaker 2: You know, make you feel anyway, just as I hated it,

745
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:27,680
Speaker 2: You hate it?

746
00:38:27,719 --> 00:38:29,400
Speaker 6: I hated it? Okay, how about you?

747
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:31,560
Speaker 3: My friend keeps trying to get me to go Clay

748
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:32,800
Speaker 3: pigeon shooting.

749
00:38:32,680 --> 00:38:34,080
Speaker 6: That I was going to talk about.

750
00:38:34,280 --> 00:38:35,919
Speaker 3: Well, go ahead, because I haven't gone yet.

751
00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:39,080
Speaker 2: Oh okay, but wait, didn't you shoot rifles? Weren't you

752
00:38:39,160 --> 00:38:42,319
Speaker 2: the best rifle shooter as a nine year old.

753
00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:51,560
Speaker 3: I went, yes, yes, I wait, why a pase no?

754
00:38:51,719 --> 00:38:52,120
Speaker 6: I went.

755
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:55,280
Speaker 3: I had a very brief stint of going to summer camps.

756
00:38:55,400 --> 00:39:00,520
Speaker 3: They weren't my thing. Chronic only child, didn't like organized anything,

757
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:02,600
Speaker 3: being told I had to do anything at a certain time.

758
00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:05,960
Speaker 3: But I did go to summer camp in Reno, Nevada.

759
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:07,640
Speaker 3: This is, of course, where they would let nine year

760
00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:12,560
Speaker 3: olds be shooting rifles and there was a rifler I

761
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:14,520
Speaker 3: mean these were like two barrel shotguns. There was a

762
00:39:14,640 --> 00:39:18,440
Speaker 3: riflery course, which I probably took to because it was

763
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:20,320
Speaker 3: like the thing you had to be the least athletic

764
00:39:20,440 --> 00:39:25,040
Speaker 3: to do because you're laying on your stomach. But I

765
00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:27,160
Speaker 3: actually I got really good at it over the summer,

766
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:28,080
Speaker 3: and I remember, I.

767
00:39:28,040 --> 00:39:30,920
Speaker 6: Feel like you came home with a ribbon. I'm sure rifle.

768
00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:33,560
Speaker 3: No, well exactly. I think that is where my rifle

769
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:36,040
Speaker 3: recent stopped because I got back to LA and I'm like,

770
00:39:36,120 --> 00:39:38,040
Speaker 3: I loved shooting guns, and they're like, well, that's never

771
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:39,960
Speaker 3: gonna happen again. So I hope you enjoyed it.

772
00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:41,040
Speaker 1: Like you're in Los Angeles.

773
00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 2: BID recently did go with my friend who knows a

774
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:48,279
Speaker 2: lot about guns. I mean, that's the thing you don't

775
00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:51,000
Speaker 2: want to go with unless you're with somebody who's taking

776
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:53,640
Speaker 2: it seriously, who knows what they're doing, like it's not

777
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:58,360
Speaker 2: a frivolous hobby. And I take guns very seriously. I

778
00:39:58,400 --> 00:40:01,040
Speaker 2: think I would lean to the They make me uncomfortable.

779
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,800
Speaker 2: But I sort of decided I need to learn about

780
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:07,680
Speaker 2: this so that not necessarily to have one, but just

781
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:11,480
Speaker 2: so that I'm less uncomfortable. And my great friend Matt,

782
00:40:11,560 --> 00:40:15,719
Speaker 2: he took me to arrange out in like northern Los Angeles,

783
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:19,319
Speaker 2: and it was really fascinating because we were doing the

784
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:22,439
Speaker 2: clay pitching thing with the shotgun, and first of all,

785
00:40:22,480 --> 00:40:24,480
Speaker 2: it's a lot of muscle and a lot of like

786
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:28,120
Speaker 2: my shoulder after we finished basically an hour of shooting

787
00:40:28,200 --> 00:40:30,120
Speaker 2: was I don't think I could move my shoulder for

788
00:40:30,160 --> 00:40:30,839
Speaker 2: the next like.

789
00:40:31,160 --> 00:40:32,600
Speaker 6: Day or so. It was very sore.

790
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:35,719
Speaker 2: But anyway, it was a great learning curve because at

791
00:40:35,760 --> 00:40:39,520
Speaker 2: first I completely sucked and I didn't even get close

792
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,799
Speaker 2: to hitting it at all. And then he did this

793
00:40:42,920 --> 00:40:46,040
Speaker 2: great thing which made me learn something about myself. He

794
00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:49,880
Speaker 2: videoed me and then he showed me the video and

795
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,760
Speaker 2: he said, do you see what you're doing right before

796
00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:56,200
Speaker 2: you pull the trigger. Do you see how you're jerking

797
00:40:56,239 --> 00:40:58,480
Speaker 2: your shoulder back. That is why your.

798
00:40:58,360 --> 00:40:59,120
Speaker 6: Aim is off.

799
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:02,279
Speaker 2: And I realized about and right after he showed me,

800
00:41:02,360 --> 00:41:04,400
Speaker 2: I did it and I hit three in a row,

801
00:41:04,719 --> 00:41:08,640
Speaker 2: and I happened to be wearing camouflage pants and I'm

802
00:41:08,640 --> 00:41:12,319
Speaker 2: going to show this video also I am such a badass.

803
00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:17,759
Speaker 2: It was a very bad ass moment. And I own that, like,

804
00:41:17,960 --> 00:41:20,400
Speaker 2: I mean, I hang on to that because it was

805
00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:23,160
Speaker 2: kind of a I was surprised that I was able

806
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:25,400
Speaker 2: to do that, but it taught me something about myself,

807
00:41:25,440 --> 00:41:30,359
Speaker 2: and I wonder that I'm a visual learner like you.

808
00:41:30,600 --> 00:41:31,799
Speaker 6: He could tell he was.

809
00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:34,880
Speaker 2: He was telling me for fifteen minutes, don't move your body,

810
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:37,800
Speaker 2: don't move your back, don't move like he was audibly

811
00:41:37,880 --> 00:41:40,800
Speaker 2: telling me what I was doing wrong, and I couldn't

812
00:41:40,840 --> 00:41:44,120
Speaker 2: translate it into physicality. And as soon as I looked

813
00:41:44,160 --> 00:41:48,040
Speaker 2: at it, the next thing, I never missed one. Like

814
00:41:48,080 --> 00:41:49,879
Speaker 2: it was just like boom, boom boom. And it made

815
00:41:49,920 --> 00:41:52,200
Speaker 2: me think, like that makes sense because I'm a dancer

816
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:55,920
Speaker 2: right in my bones, and I would be looking in

817
00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:58,840
Speaker 2: a mirror at choreography and looking at my own body,

818
00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:00,880
Speaker 2: and like, does that look right what I'm doing? And

819
00:42:00,920 --> 00:42:03,000
Speaker 2: so maybe that's how I learned things.

820
00:42:03,320 --> 00:42:06,879
Speaker 3: Well, just speaking of being a badass, I have to say,

821
00:42:06,880 --> 00:42:09,799
Speaker 3: and I did write down while watching this episode, Oh

822
00:42:09,840 --> 00:42:12,520
Speaker 3: my god, Bree is so daddy right now. With this

823
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:17,360
Speaker 3: gun behind George and the way she says, you have

824
00:42:17,400 --> 00:42:20,120
Speaker 3: to hold it like you're holding a beautiful white dove.

825
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:21,880
Speaker 3: I know, what a combination.

826
00:42:22,040 --> 00:42:25,160
Speaker 6: It's tight enough to kill it, but you know, yeah.

827
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:27,960
Speaker 3: Also what a combination of war and peace imagery. A

828
00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:30,799
Speaker 3: white dove is a piece. And then but it's a

829
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:31,959
Speaker 3: gun she's talking about.

830
00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:34,200
Speaker 2: I think the gun was from World War two too.

831
00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:36,160
Speaker 2: I think you might have said that, yeah, makes that

832
00:42:36,200 --> 00:42:37,760
Speaker 2: imagery there's really.

833
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:42,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a it's a fraud image. I just have

834
00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:44,640
Speaker 3: to say. Obviously it ends with terrible timing on his

835
00:42:44,719 --> 00:42:47,400
Speaker 3: part to lean back and try to kiss her wall

836
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:51,719
Speaker 3: shooting the gun. But what have you ever had a

837
00:42:51,840 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 3: date that? Like, what's the worst way a date has

838
00:42:54,120 --> 00:42:54,640
Speaker 3: ever ended?

839
00:42:54,800 --> 00:43:00,279
Speaker 5: I have a bad kissing date story, So it's not that.

840
00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:04,600
Speaker 5: But I will say my husband loves this story. I

841
00:43:04,640 --> 00:43:08,000
Speaker 5: feel bad for the person it's about, but he loves

842
00:43:08,080 --> 00:43:10,719
Speaker 5: laughing at this story because it's really it really is.

843
00:43:10,640 --> 00:43:12,680
Speaker 1: A bad look for me, which is okay.

844
00:43:12,719 --> 00:43:15,960
Speaker 5: So I'd gone on a date, a first date with someone,

845
00:43:16,320 --> 00:43:18,520
Speaker 5: and the first date was good. I would say it

846
00:43:18,560 --> 00:43:22,280
Speaker 5: was fine slash good. It wasn't amazing, but it was fine.

847
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:22,839
Speaker 1: You know.

848
00:43:23,239 --> 00:43:24,879
Speaker 5: We went on the date, we went to a comedy show,

849
00:43:25,360 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 5: we went for drinks afterwards. At the end of the night,

850
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:29,160
Speaker 5: I let him kiss me good night. Okay, that's the

851
00:43:29,160 --> 00:43:31,600
Speaker 5: first date. And then he asked if he could take

852
00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:33,239
Speaker 5: me on a second date. I said sure, because, like

853
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:35,759
Speaker 5: I said, it was fine us right b plus and

854
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:38,200
Speaker 5: I was like, okay, we'll see. So we go on

855
00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:41,080
Speaker 5: a second date and we just go to dinner that time,

856
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:45,120
Speaker 5: and halfway through the it'd been bothering me. He reminded

857
00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:47,920
Speaker 5: me of someone and I couldn't place who this person

858
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:51,160
Speaker 5: reminded me of it halfway through dinner I realized he

859
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:52,800
Speaker 5: reminds me of my brother Alex.

860
00:43:52,960 --> 00:43:54,080
Speaker 3: Oh yes.

861
00:43:54,440 --> 00:43:56,640
Speaker 5: And then of course I was like, well, that's the

862
00:43:56,760 --> 00:43:58,560
Speaker 5: end of this, and how do I wrap this thing up?

863
00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:00,640
Speaker 5: Because I cannot sit across from this person who thinks

864
00:44:00,680 --> 00:44:02,880
Speaker 5: we're on a romantic date. Now that I've realized he

865
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,560
Speaker 5: reminds me of my brother, and so that's in my

866
00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:06,439
Speaker 5: head the rest of the time.

867
00:44:06,480 --> 00:44:08,640
Speaker 1: We get through the date. He's driving me home, he's

868
00:44:08,680 --> 00:44:09,239
Speaker 1: dropping me off.

869
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:11,879
Speaker 5: Of course he thinks, well, we kissed on the first date,

870
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:15,839
Speaker 5: so I'm gonna go in again, and so he does,

871
00:44:16,080 --> 00:44:18,080
Speaker 5: and of course I'm like, my brother's about kiss me.

872
00:44:18,200 --> 00:44:22,239
Speaker 5: So I turn and he kisses my cheek and it's

873
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:25,719
Speaker 5: very awkward. And because I am a people pleaser and

874
00:44:25,760 --> 00:44:27,840
Speaker 5: because I wasn't good at sitting in the awkwardness or

875
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:29,560
Speaker 5: just being honest in that moment, even though I'm a

876
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:33,080
Speaker 5: chronic truth teller, he was like, oh, you turned And

877
00:44:33,120 --> 00:44:37,360
Speaker 5: I said, well you can try again, is like the

878
00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:37,879
Speaker 5: worst thing.

879
00:44:38,239 --> 00:44:41,280
Speaker 1: So he does try again, and I turned my head again.

880
00:44:41,760 --> 00:44:44,839
Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like such an asshole. He must

881
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:48,080
Speaker 1: have been like, what is she playing again? What is this?

882
00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:49,520
Speaker 1: She is horrible?

883
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:52,239
Speaker 5: Yeah, And then I send him the next morning like

884
00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:54,120
Speaker 5: a I didn't tell him he reminded me of my brother,

885
00:44:54,160 --> 00:44:56,120
Speaker 5: but I send him a nice worded text of you know,

886
00:44:56,160 --> 00:44:58,040
Speaker 5: I just don't see this going in that direction.

887
00:44:58,160 --> 00:45:00,799
Speaker 2: Whatever, but okay, I'm not a pretty with a one

888
00:45:00,840 --> 00:45:04,000
Speaker 2: liner of a date that Vanessa Williams set me up

889
00:45:04,040 --> 00:45:06,200
Speaker 2: on a date with a British guy once who I

890
00:45:06,239 --> 00:45:08,839
Speaker 2: slept with on the first date, and after it was over,

891
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:11,240
Speaker 2: he told me it looked like I had a tail,

892
00:45:14,719 --> 00:45:18,280
Speaker 2: but that was because that needs a little more common Well,

893
00:45:18,400 --> 00:45:24,200
Speaker 2: it means that my tailbone structurally sticks out of like

894
00:45:24,320 --> 00:45:27,640
Speaker 2: I have an extra vertebrate bray. I guess I broke.

895
00:45:28,040 --> 00:45:33,520
Speaker 2: I broke my tailbone, and so my tailbone sort of

896
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:36,239
Speaker 2: like sticks out a little bit, and it might to

897
00:45:36,640 --> 00:45:45,560
Speaker 2: an an inappropriate British person prompt them to say, you

898
00:45:45,600 --> 00:45:46,720
Speaker 2: look like you have a tail.

899
00:45:46,920 --> 00:45:47,759
Speaker 6: That was the end of that.

900
00:45:47,840 --> 00:45:53,520
Speaker 3: Thanks, I have a first date end of a date

901
00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:56,320
Speaker 3: story that reminds me a little bit of yours. Andrea,

902
00:45:56,360 --> 00:45:59,839
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I'm dead. You can try again, and

903
00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:03,359
Speaker 3: you turn again. So I had been on a first

904
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:06,320
Speaker 3: date with someone who I knew for a little while.

905
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:09,040
Speaker 3: I think he kind of thought it was romantic. I

906
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:12,759
Speaker 3: was like, hmm, being open to like, oh, I'm just

907
00:46:12,800 --> 00:46:14,759
Speaker 3: gonna say yes to more things and like meet new

908
00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:17,720
Speaker 3: people that maybe I wouldn't typically date. And he planned

909
00:46:17,880 --> 00:46:20,279
Speaker 3: He called my friend before he planned, like what would

910
00:46:20,320 --> 00:46:21,880
Speaker 3: she like where she liked to go? Took me to

911
00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:24,520
Speaker 3: a nice restaurant. I was like, you know, there's a

912
00:46:24,560 --> 00:46:27,000
Speaker 3: little bit of chemistry. And then he had another plan

913
00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:28,960
Speaker 3: after and the other plan was to go to an

914
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:32,040
Speaker 3: after dinner we went to this art thing. And we

915
00:46:32,080 --> 00:46:34,239
Speaker 3: went go to the art thing, and it's like this

916
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:36,880
Speaker 3: weird psychedelic art exhibit in downtown lay we have to

917
00:46:36,920 --> 00:46:39,720
Speaker 3: like lay on the ground and there's all these interact which, honestly,

918
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:41,279
Speaker 3: it would be cool if you were with someone you

919
00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:44,439
Speaker 3: wanted to be like laying close to and like.

920
00:46:45,360 --> 00:46:45,880
Speaker 1: On your shoulder.

921
00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:50,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly. And when I realized between dinner and arriving there,

922
00:46:51,040 --> 00:46:56,200
Speaker 3: I wasn't physically feeling it, not just because now I'm

923
00:46:56,320 --> 00:46:59,319
Speaker 3: dating women, but I just it wasn't it wasn't there

924
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:01,960
Speaker 3: for me. And then we have to like suffer through

925
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:04,960
Speaker 3: laying and dure all these things, and he's kind of

926
00:47:04,960 --> 00:47:07,279
Speaker 3: trying to like hold my hand and be romantic and

927
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:10,920
Speaker 3: I'm like recoiling. And then we finished that and I'm like, Okay,

928
00:47:11,120 --> 00:47:12,719
Speaker 3: I get to go home and he goes. So now

929
00:47:12,760 --> 00:47:15,160
Speaker 3: for part three of the day, and it turns out

930
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:17,680
Speaker 3: we were going to like a music venue he'd also plan.

931
00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:20,800
Speaker 3: So it just was this endlessly torturous night and finally

932
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:22,879
Speaker 3: I'm like, I have to go home. Please take me home.

933
00:47:23,200 --> 00:47:26,080
Speaker 3: He drives me home into I have like an outdoor

934
00:47:26,080 --> 00:47:28,720
Speaker 3: parking structure in front of where I live the building,

935
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:31,320
Speaker 3: and he drives into the parking structure and he walks

936
00:47:31,360 --> 00:47:32,680
Speaker 3: me up to my front door and we're kind of

937
00:47:32,680 --> 00:47:34,640
Speaker 3: standing at the front door and he's like, things, this

938
00:47:34,719 --> 00:47:36,359
Speaker 3: date has gone amazing because we've been on it for

939
00:47:36,480 --> 00:47:41,240
Speaker 3: eight brigan hours now, and he goes, so, can I

940
00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:45,120
Speaker 3: like come inside to see what the you're the loft

941
00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:48,040
Speaker 3: looks like smooth, and he kind of like leans in

942
00:47:48,320 --> 00:47:50,600
Speaker 3: and I lean back and I go the gate opens

943
00:47:50,640 --> 00:47:51,879
Speaker 3: automatically on your way out.

944
00:47:54,719 --> 00:47:55,680
Speaker 5: You want to know what?

945
00:47:56,920 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 2: Almost did a spit take? That was the perfect time

946
00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:02,640
Speaker 2: the first take. I I can't believe that.

947
00:48:04,000 --> 00:48:04,520
Speaker 4: Wow.

948
00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:07,720
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, this episode wraps up with Mary Alice saying

949
00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:11,399
Speaker 2: death is inevitable. We hope something will happen to us

950
00:48:11,600 --> 00:48:17,640
Speaker 2: romance family, great loss to make our lives meaningful. We

951
00:48:17,719 --> 00:48:20,279
Speaker 2: want that for ourselves. But do we just sit on

952
00:48:20,320 --> 00:48:24,319
Speaker 2: the sidelines waiting for something to happen before it's too late?

953
00:48:24,880 --> 00:48:27,319
Speaker 2: And that was kind of like her reflection that she

954
00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:29,839
Speaker 2: leaves us with. So I think we want to leave

955
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:33,120
Speaker 2: you this episode with reflecting on how to make your

956
00:48:33,239 --> 00:48:36,000
Speaker 2: life as great as you can, how to make it

957
00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:37,440
Speaker 2: as fool as you can, and.

958
00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:40,480
Speaker 6: We're devoted to helping you do that. So thanks for

959
00:48:40,560 --> 00:48:41,360
Speaker 6: joining us again.

960
00:48:41,200 --> 00:48:44,319
Speaker 2: And we'll see you well.

961
00:48:44,600 --> 00:48:46,080
Speaker 6: We'll share with you next week.

962
00:48:46,160 --> 00:48:47,719
Speaker 1: Yes, we'll share with you next week

963
00:48:47,840 --> 00:48:50,640
Speaker 6: Because we are desperately to you