1 00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:06,120 Speaker 1: What do you do when life doesn't go according to 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:09,719 Speaker 1: plan that moment you lose a job, or a loved one, 3 00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:14,080 Speaker 1: or even a piece of yourself. I'm Brookshields and this 4 00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:18,720 Speaker 1: is now What a podcast about pivotal moments as told 5 00:00:18,760 --> 00:00:19,400 Speaker 1: by people. 6 00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:20,400 Speaker 2: Who lived them. 7 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:22,640 Speaker 1: Each week, I sit down with a guest to talk 8 00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:25,400 Speaker 1: about the times they were knocked off course and what 9 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:30,400 Speaker 1: they did to move forward. Some stories are funny, others 10 00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:36,680 Speaker 1: are gut wrenching, but all are unapologetically human and remind 11 00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:40,680 Speaker 1: us that every success and every setback is accompanied by 12 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:45,720 Speaker 1: a choice, and that choice answers one question, now. 13 00:00:45,560 --> 00:00:45,720 Speaker 3: What. 14 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:52,800 Speaker 1: Did you ever have any idols or icons that you 15 00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:56,080 Speaker 1: looked up to, either beauty wise, talent wise. 16 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,480 Speaker 4: No, just people that I love, like crushes like the 17 00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:01,880 Speaker 4: Matt Deale Ends of the World and the Andrew McCarthy's 18 00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 4: and to me later on, to me Moore, she really, 19 00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:06,920 Speaker 4: I really did, Like I thought she was amazing. 20 00:01:07,120 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 3: I did too and do later on like. 21 00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:12,200 Speaker 1: That Era that was like she was a god to me, 22 00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:14,840 Speaker 1: Like when she shaved her head, I was like, there 23 00:01:14,959 --> 00:01:16,679 Speaker 1: is a there is a god for me. 24 00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:21,480 Speaker 4: It was more around about last night and like I say, 25 00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:24,920 Speaker 4: it almost fire. I just thought, she's such a cool 26 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:27,040 Speaker 4: actress and she has just such this great life, and 27 00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:29,880 Speaker 4: she's a rob low in this movie and that like that, 28 00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:32,800 Speaker 4: that's why that that documentary that's coming out, The Brat 29 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:34,840 Speaker 4: Pack is going to be so amazing because it's such 30 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:37,120 Speaker 4: an interesting time in our lives. And they were the 31 00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:39,240 Speaker 4: kids that were like that got it and then it 32 00:01:39,319 --> 00:01:40,679 Speaker 4: later it was like nine oh two, one oh. 33 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:46,039 Speaker 1: Hello, listeners, did you miss me? I really hope you 34 00:01:46,080 --> 00:01:48,640 Speaker 1: missed me. I took some time off to shoot a 35 00:01:48,680 --> 00:01:52,240 Speaker 1: movie in Thailand, and while it was an absolute blast, 36 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:54,600 Speaker 1: I'm really excited to be back home in New York 37 00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:57,640 Speaker 1: and back in front of the mic, ready to share 38 00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:02,640 Speaker 1: with you all. Today's guest is a great one. Bethany Frankel. 39 00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:06,800 Speaker 1: She is a widely successful entrepreneur, a New York Times 40 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:13,000 Speaker 1: bestselling author and og of the Real Housewives franchise, a podcaster, 41 00:02:13,320 --> 00:02:18,080 Speaker 1: a beauty influencer, and most importantly, a mom to a 42 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:22,000 Speaker 1: beautiful teenage girl. We met through mutual friends, and I've 43 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:25,720 Speaker 1: watched in awe as she moves flawlessly from one venture 44 00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:29,680 Speaker 1: to another. Bethany is funny, She's resilient, and she's so 45 00:02:29,919 --> 00:02:32,600 Speaker 1: open about her life. And the many lessons that she's 46 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:36,080 Speaker 1: learned along the way. I loved having her on the 47 00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:40,120 Speaker 1: show and left our conversation inspired by her hustle and 48 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:44,320 Speaker 1: her passion to try something new. So, without further ado, 49 00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:46,440 Speaker 1: here is Bethany Frankel. 50 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:56,080 Speaker 3: Hi, Hi, how's it going. 51 00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:58,960 Speaker 2: It's going? Well, it really, really really is. It's just 52 00:02:59,440 --> 00:02:59,839 Speaker 2: a lot. 53 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:00,880 Speaker 3: Yeah. 54 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,840 Speaker 2: I am so happy to have you on the show. 55 00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:04,560 Speaker 2: I feel like I am so busy. 56 00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:06,760 Speaker 1: But then I look at you and I think, oh god, 57 00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:08,760 Speaker 1: I don't know how you keep it all together. 58 00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:09,640 Speaker 3: I don't know. 59 00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:13,200 Speaker 4: I think I like, I had a sort of wanting 60 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:16,520 Speaker 4: to retire, kind of like doing less, and I was, 61 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:18,600 Speaker 4: and then now it's a little busier. 62 00:03:18,639 --> 00:03:21,600 Speaker 3: But I don't like to be overtly busy. 63 00:03:21,639 --> 00:03:25,040 Speaker 4: I don't like define happiness by like the calendar being full. 64 00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:26,840 Speaker 3: I don't define that as misery. 65 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:30,040 Speaker 2: I agree. So what do you like in particular? Do 66 00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:33,240 Speaker 2: you like vacation? Do you like a balance? 67 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:37,960 Speaker 4: You know, I'm the problem is it's either boredom and nothing, 68 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:40,280 Speaker 4: like I'm sitting around in pajamas and never leaving the house, 69 00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:43,680 Speaker 4: or a day like yesterday where I'm doing back to 70 00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 4: back interviews and stacking and feel like I was abused 71 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 4: by the end of the day. So it's not there's 72 00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:51,840 Speaker 4: not It's hard to find a balance because I'm not 73 00:03:51,880 --> 00:03:54,520 Speaker 4: a person that really I don't like shop or lunch 74 00:03:54,680 --> 00:03:57,520 Speaker 4: as an activity, so I'm always just in pajamas and 75 00:03:57,560 --> 00:04:00,400 Speaker 4: so I kind of do everything's whatever activity I do 76 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:00,960 Speaker 4: with my daughter. 77 00:04:01,040 --> 00:04:02,600 Speaker 3: So it's I'm kind of boring. 78 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:04,360 Speaker 2: And your daughter is thirteen. 79 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:06,240 Speaker 3: Yes, yep, she's thirteen. 80 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:09,880 Speaker 1: Tell me a little bit about the joy of a 81 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:11,320 Speaker 1: thirteen year old girl. 82 00:04:12,520 --> 00:04:16,919 Speaker 4: Honestly, I feel like I'm supposed to really complain about 83 00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:20,040 Speaker 4: this crazy time. She's pretty I don't know, she's pretty easy, 84 00:04:20,120 --> 00:04:22,200 Speaker 4: and it's weird because she's thirteen and everyone's saying it's 85 00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:24,240 Speaker 4: this crazy time, and people kept talking about tween and 86 00:04:24,279 --> 00:04:24,920 Speaker 4: tween and tween. 87 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:27,880 Speaker 1: I think it hits at a different time. I got 88 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,599 Speaker 1: one of mine hit then and the other one didn't, 89 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:32,080 Speaker 1: and then just hit later. 90 00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:35,400 Speaker 2: It's like I feel I think my theory is. 91 00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:37,960 Speaker 1: That they they have to find reasons to hate us 92 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:41,719 Speaker 1: to justify becoming independent because there are babies. They really 93 00:04:41,760 --> 00:04:45,160 Speaker 1: don't technically want to leave us, especially if they don't 94 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:45,920 Speaker 1: really hate us. 95 00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:48,400 Speaker 4: Right, I get Yeah, I mean, I maybe I'll find 96 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:51,560 Speaker 4: out later. I mean, we definitely have our moments, but 97 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:54,640 Speaker 4: I don't know. I kind of like snap back on 98 00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:57,240 Speaker 4: the leash. I don't really allow for a lot of 99 00:04:57,680 --> 00:05:01,239 Speaker 4: complaining if it's not really grounded something. But she's gotten 100 00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:05,279 Speaker 4: really good at using her voice and expressing herself because 101 00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:10,360 Speaker 4: we had a really challenging time through this extraordinary, horrible divorce, 102 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,359 Speaker 4: and she learned how to just really understand that you 103 00:05:14,360 --> 00:05:16,560 Speaker 4: should if something's bothering you or youre upset with something, 104 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:18,560 Speaker 4: you should express it, whether it's to me, whether it's 105 00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:20,920 Speaker 4: to her friends. And she's very good at that, so 106 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:22,840 Speaker 4: she's not stifling a lot of stuff. 107 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 2: Do you see similarities in the two of you of 108 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:26,919 Speaker 2: when you were that age? 109 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:29,919 Speaker 4: I don't remember being that age at all. I really 110 00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:32,680 Speaker 4: don't remember anything. I was very adult, very young. I 111 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:34,560 Speaker 4: was going into night club I mean, so were you. 112 00:05:34,640 --> 00:05:37,360 Speaker 4: I was going into nightclubs, you know, like the Palladium 113 00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,640 Speaker 4: and the Tunnel at fourteen. So I can't even believe 114 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:43,279 Speaker 4: that they are little kids. And they are a little kids. 115 00:05:43,279 --> 00:05:45,440 Speaker 4: So I don't understand how I was and a little kid. 116 00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:48,200 Speaker 4: I don't because it's not about who taught you, like 117 00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:49,279 Speaker 4: it's like, what did I look like? 118 00:05:49,320 --> 00:05:49,640 Speaker 3: I don't know. 119 00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:51,960 Speaker 4: I just don't understand how I was doing adult things 120 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:53,520 Speaker 4: at that age when I look at her. 121 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:56,599 Speaker 1: I mean, you've spoken about this, so I'm not saying 122 00:05:56,600 --> 00:06:00,200 Speaker 1: anything that you haven't already said. But it was far 123 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:03,160 Speaker 1: as how you grew up. You said that it was 124 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:05,960 Speaker 1: a tough childhood. Your parents divorced right when you were 125 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:08,760 Speaker 1: really young. Yes, and because your dad was he was 126 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:12,000 Speaker 1: a famous horse trainer, and that mean you had to 127 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:14,840 Speaker 1: move around a lot. Yes, how did your mom? Did 128 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:18,760 Speaker 1: your mom just like give you such free rein or yeah? 129 00:06:18,800 --> 00:06:21,240 Speaker 4: I mean I just read that's such a long conversation. 130 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:23,719 Speaker 4: That's just growing up at the racetrack and growing up 131 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:26,600 Speaker 4: in a very fast life and a lot of substance 132 00:06:27,600 --> 00:06:31,279 Speaker 4: abuse and just not a child you know, physical abuse, 133 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:34,479 Speaker 4: a lot of cop calling and crazy stuff, so not 134 00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:36,880 Speaker 4: a lot of childhood. They're just like dealing with stuff 135 00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:37,960 Speaker 4: that adults were dealing with. 136 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:40,280 Speaker 2: How do you think that shaped you? 137 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:42,000 Speaker 3: I don't know specifically. 138 00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:44,640 Speaker 4: I know that I was just always like alert and 139 00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:47,080 Speaker 4: analytical and a wreck in my house. That there's but 140 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:48,440 Speaker 4: I just you don't know any different. 141 00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:50,760 Speaker 1: There was just well, you don't know what to expect 142 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:54,760 Speaker 1: when you're living in a house that has alcoholism or 143 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,600 Speaker 1: any type of substance abuse. 144 00:06:56,400 --> 00:07:00,320 Speaker 4: You eating disorder, bolimia, alcoholism, drugs, like I kind of 145 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:02,359 Speaker 4: had it all gambling, It was all like it was 146 00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:04,839 Speaker 4: I lived in a crazy house. But it wasn't it 147 00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:07,680 Speaker 4: was fun house kind of it was action. I don't 148 00:07:07,720 --> 00:07:09,920 Speaker 4: even know to say it was an action house. It 149 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:11,080 Speaker 4: was a lot going on. 150 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:12,240 Speaker 3: There was a lot of moving. 151 00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:15,679 Speaker 4: They were either just we had only a card table 152 00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:17,680 Speaker 4: in the house or six cars in the driveway. 153 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:21,000 Speaker 1: My mother used to bring in people. I'd be like, 154 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:24,280 Speaker 1: who's the that isn't that the kid from the gas station? 155 00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:26,640 Speaker 1: And she'd be like, yeah, he needs a place to say. 156 00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:28,400 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, well I had. 157 00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:30,240 Speaker 4: We had a lot of stragglers, but ours were like 158 00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:34,680 Speaker 4: gamblers and like bookies, bookmakers and like jockeys agents. 159 00:07:34,680 --> 00:07:36,080 Speaker 3: It was a lot of men and there was a lot. 160 00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:39,000 Speaker 3: There's a lot of like degenerates living in my house. 161 00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:43,080 Speaker 1: How did you protect yourself against the from them? 162 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't. 163 00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:48,680 Speaker 4: I'm I think it's why I am the way I 164 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:51,000 Speaker 4: am now. I'm extremely tough. That's why, don't you know? 165 00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:54,680 Speaker 4: I I'm beyond resilient. And tough and like I could, 166 00:07:54,680 --> 00:07:57,360 Speaker 4: there's not much I can't deal with and so I'm 167 00:07:57,400 --> 00:07:58,200 Speaker 4: just used to that. 168 00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:01,240 Speaker 3: I'm used to that survival mode. Yeah, it's fucked up. 169 00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:01,440 Speaker 3: I was. 170 00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:03,720 Speaker 4: I grew up in a very, very fucked up environement. 171 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:07,040 Speaker 4: I like, I try to think about it, and I'm like, 172 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:09,400 Speaker 4: that's insane, Like it just it's not even like woe 173 00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:11,400 Speaker 4: is me because I am so tough, so it doesn't matter, 174 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:14,520 Speaker 4: like who cares? But it's it's and it's not a 175 00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:17,280 Speaker 4: shield I'm covering up or anything. I definitely am emotional 176 00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:20,480 Speaker 4: sometimes I'm just feeling emotional about it right now. But 177 00:08:20,680 --> 00:08:22,760 Speaker 4: I don't think about it that often, not because I've 178 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:23,280 Speaker 4: blocked it out. 179 00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:24,720 Speaker 3: I just it's so long ago. 180 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:28,360 Speaker 4: Just it's just it's, you know, I grew up in 181 00:08:28,440 --> 00:08:30,119 Speaker 4: a nasty, nasty house. 182 00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:34,840 Speaker 1: I've fet so hard for a child without a sibling. Yes, 183 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:37,559 Speaker 1: it makes you tough, and you know, I don't know 184 00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,400 Speaker 1: if you get sick of being called a survivor, but 185 00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:42,400 Speaker 1: I'm always called a survivor. And when I think about 186 00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:48,400 Speaker 1: how many different ways my life could have gone and 187 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:52,960 Speaker 1: why I didn't become a complete fuck up or self destruct, 188 00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:57,840 Speaker 1: I don't know why or how was there. I just 189 00:08:57,880 --> 00:08:59,920 Speaker 1: am curious for you if there was a moment in 190 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:03,040 Speaker 1: your life that you think you see could have gone 191 00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:05,160 Speaker 1: a very very different way. 192 00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:09,680 Speaker 3: I think I was very analytic. I'm I'm. 193 00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,800 Speaker 4: I was always alone and I was always thinking. I 194 00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:14,200 Speaker 4: just remember always being analytical and trying to analyze it 195 00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:15,800 Speaker 4: because no one was telling me anything, and I had 196 00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:18,720 Speaker 4: no guidance and I didn't have any role models, and 197 00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,800 Speaker 4: so I was always working things out on my own. 198 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:23,280 Speaker 4: And I see my see that in myself now. I'm 199 00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:25,280 Speaker 4: always working things out of my own and playing chess 200 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:26,719 Speaker 4: in my head and figuring out how it's going to 201 00:09:26,760 --> 00:09:30,600 Speaker 4: happen and fix it, and and often do. I don't 202 00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:34,960 Speaker 4: really see any kind of barriers. And I do think 203 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:38,080 Speaker 4: about like it's it's a miracle that I was not 204 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:42,079 Speaker 4: a drug addict or things like that. But I'm always 205 00:09:42,120 --> 00:09:43,840 Speaker 4: a person who's needed to be in control. 206 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:47,679 Speaker 1: Did you have best friends, like did you have best, 207 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:50,719 Speaker 1: best loyal friends? 208 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:53,559 Speaker 4: I had different I since high school, yes, but as 209 00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:55,319 Speaker 4: a child child, yes, different. 210 00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:55,840 Speaker 3: People along the way. 211 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:59,080 Speaker 4: But we I went to thirteen school, so I was 212 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:01,400 Speaker 4: never in this school two years in a row. 213 00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:05,319 Speaker 2: And was that because you moved Why why was that? 214 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:08,319 Speaker 3: Yeah, because my step we moved. We moved a lot. 215 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:11,080 Speaker 3: We moved a lot lot, like from the city aso. 216 00:10:10,920 --> 00:10:12,679 Speaker 2: Far as we're running away from something or. 217 00:10:13,559 --> 00:10:16,720 Speaker 4: In one case my stepfather said that the mafia was 218 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:19,520 Speaker 4: after us. In another case it was like moving on up. 219 00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:21,320 Speaker 4: It's the same thing with the card table and the 220 00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:23,679 Speaker 4: six cars in the driveway. It was just like a 221 00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:26,760 Speaker 4: very it's a racetrack lifestyle. You have to like understand 222 00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 4: it to know it. But anybody who's listening, who knows 223 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:31,280 Speaker 4: anybody who grew up around the race truck, it's just 224 00:10:31,320 --> 00:10:38,160 Speaker 4: this like bizarre, dysfunctional action gambling highs and lows lifestyle. 225 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,520 Speaker 1: My mother just used to do it at the Delhi. 226 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,840 Speaker 1: We only like did our picks through the Delhi. 227 00:10:44,120 --> 00:10:46,200 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, no, Like I was going to Vegas at 228 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:49,720 Speaker 4: thirteen at the craps tables. And because my stepfather, who 229 00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:52,880 Speaker 4: was a horse trainer, his uncle was Don Rickles manager. 230 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:55,400 Speaker 4: So we'd all go for three weeks to Vegas and gamble, 231 00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:57,880 Speaker 4: and then we'd go to Saratoga this summer to the 232 00:10:57,960 --> 00:10:59,720 Speaker 4: racetrack and I didn't go to camp or anything. 233 00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:01,800 Speaker 3: I would sit at the jockeys room and. 234 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:05,880 Speaker 1: That kind of where gambling is involved. How did did 235 00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,480 Speaker 1: that teach you anything about business? 236 00:11:08,559 --> 00:11:11,360 Speaker 4: I would say just the racetrack taught me so much 237 00:11:11,400 --> 00:11:15,079 Speaker 4: about just street smarts and competition. 238 00:11:15,559 --> 00:11:16,040 Speaker 3: Winning. 239 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:19,559 Speaker 4: There's no you know, nobody cares who came second in 240 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:22,760 Speaker 4: the Kentucky Derby. Although it's such an incredible accomplishment just 241 00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:25,199 Speaker 4: to get to the Kentucky Derby, it doesn't it's a touching. 242 00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:26,600 Speaker 3: Story if you lose by a nose. 243 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:32,880 Speaker 4: So just winning, just just winning and competition and action 244 00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:38,720 Speaker 4: and highs and lows and and upstairs downstairs, you know, 245 00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:42,640 Speaker 4: like the racetrack is an amazing place where billionaires and. 246 00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:45,160 Speaker 3: Uh hot, I was a hot walker. 247 00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:47,600 Speaker 4: That's the person who cools the horses off in the morning, 248 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,560 Speaker 4: you know, walking them around the shed. But billionaires and 249 00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:55,120 Speaker 4: grooms of horses interact. You know, it's a down n 250 00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:58,200 Speaker 4: abby type of upstairs downstairs thing. So I'm kind of 251 00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:00,880 Speaker 4: great in any situation. I can inter act with anyone 252 00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:01,839 Speaker 4: and do. 253 00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:05,520 Speaker 3: And just good life skills. 254 00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:05,760 Speaker 2: You know. 255 00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:09,280 Speaker 3: It's it's a world, it's an environment, and it's pretty tough. 256 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:13,400 Speaker 1: What about instincts do you think it because I don't 257 00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:17,880 Speaker 1: with gambling or gamble is where do instincts play a 258 00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:20,000 Speaker 1: role in gambling. Is there such a thing? 259 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:24,160 Speaker 4: I think it's more the instincts are more about being 260 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:27,640 Speaker 4: so heightened from all the earlier childhood stuff. If you 261 00:12:27,760 --> 00:12:31,760 Speaker 4: like our people, there are there are studies about people. 262 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:36,760 Speaker 4: People who are children of addicts or dysfunction or abuse 263 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:39,920 Speaker 4: pick up on so many more things in other people 264 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:42,280 Speaker 4: than just people who had normal lives, because it's these 265 00:12:42,559 --> 00:12:45,800 Speaker 4: not just triggers, but it's just it's this noise inside 266 00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:47,520 Speaker 4: of you. It's just something that you just can You 267 00:12:47,520 --> 00:12:50,640 Speaker 4: can just feel. You can feel when someone's jealous, when 268 00:12:50,640 --> 00:12:52,719 Speaker 4: they don't do anything, when they're not saying anything, when 269 00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:55,960 Speaker 4: they're just you just can feel when they're jealous, or 270 00:12:56,040 --> 00:13:00,480 Speaker 4: when they're competitive, or when they're tricky or not trust worthy, 271 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:03,559 Speaker 4: or have like eating issues, or you could just feel 272 00:13:03,559 --> 00:13:05,400 Speaker 4: these things because you grew up around all these triggers, 273 00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:07,600 Speaker 4: so you just kind of can feel addiction, you can 274 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:10,040 Speaker 4: feel someone else's stuff. 275 00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:14,160 Speaker 2: I think I was an adult so very early. 276 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:18,280 Speaker 1: Don't resent it, never poor me, don't have a pity 277 00:13:18,679 --> 00:13:19,679 Speaker 1: moment in my life. 278 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:22,200 Speaker 2: I don't. I think it made me sharper. 279 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:27,360 Speaker 1: We were definitely bohemian, and just one minute we were 280 00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:29,439 Speaker 1: here in the next minute, we were there, and my mother, 281 00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:32,240 Speaker 1: would you know, it got to the point where she 282 00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:34,840 Speaker 1: would just pick up jobs for me by meeting some 283 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,319 Speaker 1: random person, and you just had to go along with it. 284 00:13:37,760 --> 00:13:40,679 Speaker 4: We just had different worries and different growing up too. 285 00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:42,600 Speaker 4: The kids are worried about other things, like it seems 286 00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:44,360 Speaker 4: really big to them. The stuff that happens at school, 287 00:13:44,559 --> 00:13:46,720 Speaker 4: like homework is overwhelming. 288 00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:47,000 Speaker 3: And daunting for them. 289 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:48,480 Speaker 4: So maybe I didn't care that much about Homer, but 290 00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:51,120 Speaker 4: they think it's such so stressful when you know most 291 00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:53,000 Speaker 4: of them are going to end up being fine if 292 00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,000 Speaker 4: they don't pass that one test, but they're stressed out 293 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:57,680 Speaker 4: about so many things. So it's just different types of stress. 294 00:13:57,720 --> 00:13:58,199 Speaker 3: I think. 295 00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:11,320 Speaker 1: I called this show now What because it's about those 296 00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:16,160 Speaker 1: pivotal moments in people's lives, and you've had I'm sure many, 297 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:18,480 Speaker 1: and I usually wait for this question at the end, 298 00:14:18,559 --> 00:14:22,080 Speaker 1: but there's so many of those moments that I believe 299 00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:25,840 Speaker 1: you must have had. Is there one that sticks out. 300 00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:30,120 Speaker 4: Like as a positive? This is amazing kind of moment, 301 00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:31,000 Speaker 4: Like any. 302 00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:33,640 Speaker 1: Kind, there are positives, there are negatives, there are scary ones, 303 00:14:33,680 --> 00:14:35,600 Speaker 1: there are all there's no where you just sort of 304 00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:37,560 Speaker 1: said Okay, now what do I do? 305 00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:40,120 Speaker 4: Oh, I mean, I have a it just popped in. 306 00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:42,600 Speaker 4: Two things popped into my head, and one was when 307 00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:47,640 Speaker 4: I didn't get to be on the Apprentice Donald Trumps 308 00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:51,280 Speaker 4: season two because the regular person's Apprentice, because I was broken. 309 00:14:51,360 --> 00:14:53,560 Speaker 4: I just wanted some help to I was in my 310 00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:56,040 Speaker 4: thirties too, to like get a job and be something, 311 00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:57,640 Speaker 4: because no one is really ever going to take care 312 00:14:57,640 --> 00:15:00,000 Speaker 4: of me. And I wasn't anywhere and I wasn't successful, 313 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:01,840 Speaker 4: I had no money, and I was a mayor. I 314 00:15:01,920 --> 00:15:04,840 Speaker 4: just like so that was a real blow to not 315 00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:07,240 Speaker 4: get it. But I've always been a person that just 316 00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:10,080 Speaker 4: brushes myself off and picks myself up and just keeps going, 317 00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:12,120 Speaker 4: even though I don't know which direction and didn't know 318 00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:12,360 Speaker 4: that that. 319 00:15:12,440 --> 00:15:15,360 Speaker 3: Still was young and all that. 320 00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:18,600 Speaker 4: That was one and the other one was I don't 321 00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:20,280 Speaker 4: know that I actually felt this then, but I thought 322 00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:21,640 Speaker 4: of it when you just said it was when I 323 00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:24,400 Speaker 4: was on the cover of Forbes magazine, because that was 324 00:15:24,400 --> 00:15:29,920 Speaker 4: insane and crazy and ridiculous, like that's a ridiculous thing 325 00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:33,360 Speaker 4: that happened to me. That's insane, and by the way, 326 00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:36,160 Speaker 4: that's held up like ill. I will tell anybody who 327 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:39,640 Speaker 4: would ask, like, that's like my sort of claim to fame. 328 00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:42,080 Speaker 2: But those are two very, very different. 329 00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:44,920 Speaker 1: Well I would say that I don't think, yeah, one 330 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,840 Speaker 1: hit wonder is not what comes to mind when I 331 00:15:46,840 --> 00:15:47,200 Speaker 1: think that. 332 00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:49,000 Speaker 2: But those are two. 333 00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:53,200 Speaker 1: Incredibly polarized experiences. 334 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:56,440 Speaker 2: Yes, how did you interpret them? What did you did? 335 00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:57,400 Speaker 2: You just laugh at it? 336 00:15:58,280 --> 00:16:00,520 Speaker 4: I guess one is the result of the I mean 337 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,400 Speaker 4: one was like, this was gonna be my chance and 338 00:16:03,400 --> 00:16:04,640 Speaker 4: I was going to get a job. I just wanted 339 00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:06,720 Speaker 4: a job the first time. I just wanted a job 340 00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:09,320 Speaker 4: that was consistent that and to prove that I could 341 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:13,960 Speaker 4: get there, because I bet somebody in a restaurant someone 342 00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 4: said you would never get on that show. You might, 343 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:18,440 Speaker 4: you know, I will get on that show or something. 344 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:20,080 Speaker 4: And I said, you mark my words, I'll get on 345 00:16:20,120 --> 00:16:21,480 Speaker 4: that show. And I didn't even know how to get 346 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:23,240 Speaker 4: on a show or what that entailed. And I didn't 347 00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:25,680 Speaker 4: have a video camera nor know how to use one 348 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:29,120 Speaker 4: or anything so that. But I just wanted that job, 349 00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:31,800 Speaker 4: and I wanted that competition, and I was excited by that. 350 00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:34,280 Speaker 4: And I went through this whole process of a week 351 00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:39,360 Speaker 4: of psychological testing and emotional testing and sequestering and it 352 00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:42,080 Speaker 4: was brutal week of being alone. 353 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:43,120 Speaker 3: And then I didn't get it. 354 00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:45,040 Speaker 2: Did you do that on your own accord or they 355 00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:45,640 Speaker 2: set that up? 356 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:46,400 Speaker 3: No, they do. 357 00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:48,040 Speaker 4: It's this whole thing that no one ever talks about. 358 00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:49,840 Speaker 4: I don't know why they don't talk about the process. 359 00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:52,440 Speaker 4: It's like a military thing. You go to the Double 360 00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:55,560 Speaker 4: Tree Hotel in Santa Monica for one week, and every 361 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,280 Speaker 4: day it's like emotional psychological test. You're not allowed to 362 00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:00,280 Speaker 4: talk to another human being. You're in your your own 363 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:02,440 Speaker 4: room alone and you can all go downstairs for fifteen 364 00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:05,080 Speaker 4: minutes to go get lunch, breakfast, lunch, and dinner, but 365 00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:07,240 Speaker 4: you cannot make eye contact. You can't talk to anyone 366 00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:09,000 Speaker 4: because they could be on the show with you. And 367 00:17:09,040 --> 00:17:11,080 Speaker 4: you do this and some people start getting sent on 368 00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:13,200 Speaker 4: the second and third day. If you've made it the 369 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:15,119 Speaker 4: whole week, you've made it. So I made it the 370 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:18,320 Speaker 4: whole week, and they made me an alternate. They picked 371 00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:20,600 Speaker 4: eighteen people. I was the nineteen. So I was torture 372 00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:22,119 Speaker 4: because I was there the whole week thinking I was 373 00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:26,880 Speaker 4: getting it, dreaming, begging, secreting, like you know, manifesting, crying, 374 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,920 Speaker 4: I'm broke, like I need it, like torturing myself because 375 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:32,640 Speaker 4: I'm so obsessive and can't go anywhere, can't do anything. 376 00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:34,480 Speaker 4: And then at the end of the week, I didn't 377 00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:34,760 Speaker 4: get it. 378 00:17:34,880 --> 00:17:35,720 Speaker 3: So that was a low. 379 00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:38,920 Speaker 4: And everybody always pretends that they just landed on these shows, 380 00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:41,080 Speaker 4: like it just happened. You just fell off of an 381 00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:43,720 Speaker 4: apprentice tree, when it's so intense. 382 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:45,520 Speaker 2: How did you not become bitter? 383 00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:46,760 Speaker 3: Because I'm not like that. 384 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:49,360 Speaker 4: I'm just like I got banged up and I put 385 00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:51,679 Speaker 4: the band aids on and then that was it. And 386 00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:53,639 Speaker 4: then I went to the Kentucky Derby that year actually 387 00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:56,639 Speaker 4: and like drank and had fun and finaggled and figured 388 00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:58,560 Speaker 4: out like how to afford to go there and stay 389 00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:00,000 Speaker 4: in a hotel room with a bunch of different people, 390 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,480 Speaker 4: And then I ended up getting onto the Martha Stewart 391 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:05,000 Speaker 4: Apprentice of Mark Burnett, and I took another whole week 392 00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:05,760 Speaker 4: and got to I. 393 00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:06,879 Speaker 3: Mean, all I had was weeks. 394 00:18:06,880 --> 00:18:08,880 Speaker 4: I was broke, and it was actually a place where 395 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,080 Speaker 4: you're being fed and it's free for the week, because 396 00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:12,080 Speaker 4: I was totally broke. 397 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,880 Speaker 3: But then that week I nailed it. 398 00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:19,719 Speaker 1: Was that the start of financial and business success. 399 00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:23,000 Speaker 4: The very that was the very start that was like 400 00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:25,320 Speaker 4: a kernel. That was not really the start, that was 401 00:18:25,359 --> 00:18:29,280 Speaker 4: fool's gold because I didn't I was the runner up, 402 00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:32,160 Speaker 4: and so then I was like just still broke, and 403 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:35,480 Speaker 4: like that show was a failure. And so now like 404 00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:38,120 Speaker 4: you think you're like a little something, but nobody else 405 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:39,800 Speaker 4: thinks that because no one saw I mean eleven million 406 00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:43,600 Speaker 4: people saw it, but now that now it was the 407 00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,720 Speaker 4: equivalent of five hundred thousand people seeing it. That was 408 00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:48,520 Speaker 4: a failure back then on network television. But it was 409 00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:50,760 Speaker 4: enough to like get me to try to jam it 410 00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:52,680 Speaker 4: down people's throats that I was a natural food chef. 411 00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:54,119 Speaker 4: I'd been on the show, and could I do like 412 00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:56,560 Speaker 4: this little cute segment on the Today Show or in 413 00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:59,480 Speaker 4: Okay magazine or something. So it was like this dry 414 00:18:59,520 --> 00:19:02,600 Speaker 4: sponge was trying to like squeeze any kind of moisture out. 415 00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:05,080 Speaker 1: Of Did you did you always like cooking or do 416 00:19:05,119 --> 00:19:06,359 Speaker 1: you went to a culinary school? 417 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:06,760 Speaker 2: Correct? 418 00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:08,800 Speaker 4: I went to culinary school, and I always was interested 419 00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:11,040 Speaker 4: in food and health and food and healing, and yes, 420 00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:14,720 Speaker 4: cooking at like that le some level, yeah, but not 421 00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:18,200 Speaker 4: like iron chef level, and having living my life in 422 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,520 Speaker 4: like scrubs, I mean scrubs in chef whites and like 423 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:25,480 Speaker 4: meissan plas and onions and living in the food and 424 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:28,920 Speaker 4: the chaos of a kitchen. That's not my personality. 425 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:33,120 Speaker 1: It's it's so when I was doing my research and 426 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:37,840 Speaker 1: you've had so many, so many different professional jobs and 427 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:41,080 Speaker 1: you just kept going forward. But part of business and 428 00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:44,800 Speaker 1: you're such an extraordinary I think instincts. You know, you 429 00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:48,000 Speaker 1: have such a good sense for what to promote. 430 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,879 Speaker 4: What why does everybody think this about me? Like, I 431 00:19:51,119 --> 00:19:52,960 Speaker 4: know that people know about skinny girl and all that stuff, 432 00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:54,960 Speaker 4: but I'm not even fishing for co I literally want 433 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,359 Speaker 4: to know because you keep saying and a lot of 434 00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:58,960 Speaker 4: people say this to me. I'm like, I have a business, 435 00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:00,399 Speaker 4: Like I have a lot of different things going on, 436 00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:02,800 Speaker 4: and yes I'm successful, but like, why does everybody think that, 437 00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:04,440 Speaker 4: like I'm such this like business gangster? 438 00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:06,440 Speaker 1: I don't, I think, but I think part of it's 439 00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:11,280 Speaker 1: true because I think part of business gangsterdom one of 440 00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:14,600 Speaker 1: the things that's very important is knowing when to walk away. 441 00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:17,879 Speaker 3: Oh okay, but that's a huge. 442 00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:21,439 Speaker 1: Skill and you don't you can't teach that to somebody. 443 00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:23,439 Speaker 1: So I think that there are things that are that 444 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:26,239 Speaker 1: are instinctual, and I do think to be able to 445 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:31,080 Speaker 1: create brands, to be in tune to the zeitgeist or 446 00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:34,320 Speaker 1: what your brand is or why it's registering with people. 447 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:36,000 Speaker 3: Yes, that's huge. 448 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,919 Speaker 1: But knowing when to walk away when I mean, you 449 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:40,760 Speaker 1: did it famously more than once. 450 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:47,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, and that just takes balls. I think, you know 451 00:20:48,359 --> 00:20:49,080 Speaker 2: how did you know? 452 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,000 Speaker 3: Well? It's funny. 453 00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:53,960 Speaker 4: It's it's the it's the all roads lead to Rome, 454 00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:56,680 Speaker 4: or the two right roads diverged in it would either 455 00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:58,920 Speaker 4: one would be a different road, and they'd be equally. 456 00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 4: You know, if I stayed on the Housewives, I'd be 457 00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:03,000 Speaker 4: a little bit more of a joke and a little 458 00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:06,080 Speaker 4: less taken seriously. But I'd turn that into something else 459 00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:09,520 Speaker 4: and I'd be the most successful clown over there and 460 00:21:10,119 --> 00:21:13,560 Speaker 4: over here. But I just I do know what to do. 461 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,560 Speaker 4: I know how to play chess. I understand what the 462 00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:18,439 Speaker 4: moves are. I can see them like that girl in 463 00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:20,520 Speaker 4: that movie on the ceiling, like I know what the 464 00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:23,920 Speaker 4: moves are five steps ahead, and nobody around me even 465 00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:25,000 Speaker 4: understands what I'm doing. 466 00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:29,280 Speaker 1: It baffles me, and my daughters have said to me, 467 00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:34,560 Speaker 1: why can't you be more like Bethany Mom Sash, She's TikTok, TikTok, 468 00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:37,760 Speaker 1: the whole thing, Like you've mastered it, and you've you've 469 00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:41,760 Speaker 1: become a rather like a beauty influencer, and you've made 470 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:48,199 Speaker 1: it so accessible to all ages. What's the behind the 471 00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:49,600 Speaker 1: scenes like of that. 472 00:21:50,280 --> 00:21:55,880 Speaker 4: It's complete, It's complete bullshit. So it's total bullshit, but everything, 473 00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:58,280 Speaker 4: so many things are bullshit, and they're just wrapped in 474 00:21:58,359 --> 00:22:01,359 Speaker 4: a non bullshit bo if it's wrapped up in a 475 00:22:01,359 --> 00:22:04,199 Speaker 4: filter and a brand deal and an influencer who is 476 00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:06,560 Speaker 4: doing a commercial twenty four hours a day, which is 477 00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:10,760 Speaker 4: frightening for our youth because I'm influenced and I know 478 00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:12,679 Speaker 4: how this all gets made and I know what it is, 479 00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:16,080 Speaker 4: and I'm a marketing expert, like I can't even say 480 00:22:16,119 --> 00:22:18,480 Speaker 4: any other word, and I'm sitting here wanting to get 481 00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:19,320 Speaker 4: sucked in and buy it. 482 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:21,000 Speaker 3: So I was like, is it? What is it? 483 00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:22,280 Speaker 2: Is there an endgame to it? 484 00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:24,800 Speaker 4: No? I never had no. It was just a natural curiosity. 485 00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:26,280 Speaker 4: I wanted to learn how to do my own makeup, 486 00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:28,560 Speaker 4: no problem. And then I was watching I was like, 487 00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:30,000 Speaker 4: I want to be I want that glow and I 488 00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:31,760 Speaker 4: want that snatch and I want that blur and I 489 00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:33,400 Speaker 4: want to buy that and buy it now, and buy 490 00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,399 Speaker 4: it now by. And then I bought it now and 491 00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:36,800 Speaker 4: I was like, this is the same. 492 00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:37,600 Speaker 3: Shit we've had forever. 493 00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:39,560 Speaker 4: And I went to the drug store and compared it 494 00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:42,200 Speaker 4: to something that's some makeup artist left or that some 495 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:45,720 Speaker 4: brand sent, you know, some fancy thing, and it's the 496 00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:48,280 Speaker 4: same shit. So I had no idea, and I started 497 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:50,439 Speaker 4: just saying, this is this is garbage. I know, this 498 00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:53,560 Speaker 4: is garbage, this is a this was Gucci, this is crap, 499 00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,720 Speaker 4: this is Shanellis's crap, and this is Shanellis is good 500 00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:57,119 Speaker 4: and this is why I sell it's crap, and this 501 00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:58,040 Speaker 4: is why I sell it's good. 502 00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:00,119 Speaker 3: And it was just the truth. It was nothing. I 503 00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:01,480 Speaker 3: had no goal, and everyone. 504 00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:03,239 Speaker 4: Was like speculating and she's doing a line and it 505 00:23:03,280 --> 00:23:06,800 Speaker 4: all had to be so sinister, and it wasn't. It 506 00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:10,840 Speaker 4: was necessary to talk about women that want to get 507 00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:12,359 Speaker 4: the hell out the door in ten minutes and that 508 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:14,280 Speaker 4: they're being influenced and they think this is real. 509 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:18,800 Speaker 1: But also, do you know the significance of the younger 510 00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:22,399 Speaker 1: that this has on the younger demographic. To see a 511 00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:26,720 Speaker 1: woman in her fifties testing products and talking about it, 512 00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:28,640 Speaker 1: it normalizes it to me, you know. 513 00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:31,000 Speaker 4: Well, it's not just the testing, it's that they know 514 00:23:31,359 --> 00:23:33,920 Speaker 4: I can afford both. So what the hell am I 515 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:36,159 Speaker 4: using the drug store thing that I really am using? 516 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,280 Speaker 4: If I can buy the others, if it doesn't matter 517 00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:39,960 Speaker 4: to me, I can buy rimes and I could buy 518 00:23:40,280 --> 00:23:41,040 Speaker 4: a coach bag. 519 00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:43,560 Speaker 3: It doesn't matter. But I know. 520 00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:46,879 Speaker 4: And I'm wearing an Express jumpsuit right now, and it's beautiful. 521 00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:49,360 Speaker 3: It looks if it was a thousand dollars, I would 522 00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:51,280 Speaker 3: believe it. It's just what it is. 523 00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:53,480 Speaker 4: And I've just always been a consumer and I've been curious. 524 00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:56,639 Speaker 4: But I was sucked in. And that's how powerful it is. 525 00:23:56,640 --> 00:23:58,480 Speaker 4: That's what I'm trying to say. How are your daughters 526 00:23:58,560 --> 00:24:00,359 Speaker 4: or my daughter, how does she stand at you ants? 527 00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,840 Speaker 4: If I was sucked in, I'm the most savvy person 528 00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:06,359 Speaker 4: you could imagine. And I was like, Oh, I want that, 529 00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:07,960 Speaker 4: I want that, I want that, I want that, and. 530 00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,360 Speaker 3: It was all it was mostly no, it was all bullshit. 531 00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:12,760 Speaker 2: But you rarely see that. I'm telling you don't. 532 00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:14,920 Speaker 3: Yes, sad you don't say about. 533 00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:19,280 Speaker 1: Especially women who are who are in their fifties like this. 534 00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:23,639 Speaker 1: It bridged the gap, and I think it's the beauty 535 00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:28,000 Speaker 1: industry doesn't bridge that gap. Now, have you gotten pushback 536 00:24:28,040 --> 00:24:29,240 Speaker 1: from any of those brands? 537 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:33,080 Speaker 4: I know that brands are afraid. Some brands are afraid, 538 00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:35,440 Speaker 4: and some brands they don't care whether I talk bad 539 00:24:35,480 --> 00:24:37,600 Speaker 4: or good. They're like watching it like a case stuff. 540 00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:40,040 Speaker 4: They're watching me like Tom Hanks playing with the toys 541 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:41,520 Speaker 4: in Big saying what is she like? 542 00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:42,119 Speaker 3: What she's not like? 543 00:24:42,119 --> 00:24:45,000 Speaker 4: And let's listen to her because she's agnostic, you know. 544 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:49,920 Speaker 4: So they are paying attention and they you know, I've 545 00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:53,600 Speaker 4: had stores, I've had major retailers call and say, how 546 00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:54,640 Speaker 4: do we make this better? 547 00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:56,000 Speaker 3: What do we do? What can we do? 548 00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:56,240 Speaker 1: You know? 549 00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:59,400 Speaker 4: So it's been fascinating for ice maker companies, like it's 550 00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:01,760 Speaker 4: been amazing. It's so mean because I'm such a consumer 551 00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:05,679 Speaker 4: and I'm fascinated by products and marketing and packaging and 552 00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:15,880 Speaker 4: formulas and not just in makeup and everything. 553 00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:19,440 Speaker 1: I want to shift to your personal life because you've 554 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:24,959 Speaker 1: been so open about your relationships, specifically your divorce, and 555 00:25:25,040 --> 00:25:29,320 Speaker 1: I'm curious about that because I've also been divorced and 556 00:25:29,359 --> 00:25:32,760 Speaker 1: walked away from a relationship. When did you know it 557 00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:35,440 Speaker 1: was time to leave? 558 00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:37,200 Speaker 4: Don't I don't know that I was ever really in 559 00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:39,720 Speaker 4: my relationship. If I really think about it, you sort 560 00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,600 Speaker 4: of steps happen. You're moving forward, you're doing things, you're 561 00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:45,359 Speaker 4: making decisions, and like the game was moving too fast. 562 00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:48,280 Speaker 4: The game was moving too fast sometimes, you know it 563 00:25:48,359 --> 00:25:50,720 Speaker 4: was where I was in my I felt the waves 564 00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:52,840 Speaker 4: starting to crust in my career. And you listen to 565 00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:55,439 Speaker 4: other people who are saying like that, you know, you 566 00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:56,879 Speaker 4: need to be with someone who can deal with your 567 00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:59,919 Speaker 4: lifestyle or can fold into what you're doing. And you know, 568 00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:02,520 Speaker 4: I was excited that I was marrying a regular guy, 569 00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:05,000 Speaker 4: what I thought was a regular, just person who didn't 570 00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:08,639 Speaker 4: want anything, and so like that seemed interesting. And maybe 571 00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:11,600 Speaker 4: I had gone through years of not feeling great about 572 00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:14,439 Speaker 4: myself or not knowing where my journey would turn in 573 00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:16,440 Speaker 4: a relationship. I might have been at a low. Other 574 00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:18,800 Speaker 4: people said you need I've done that twice, other people 575 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:20,720 Speaker 4: telling me what I need to do, and you got 576 00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:22,399 Speaker 4: to do this, and you'll never find someone like this, 577 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:23,720 Speaker 4: and no one's ever going to love you like this. 578 00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:26,920 Speaker 4: And that was way back then. And then the train 579 00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:29,760 Speaker 4: left the station, and then you're pregnant and you're on 580 00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:31,760 Speaker 4: a show, and what would this look like? And what 581 00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:33,800 Speaker 4: would this be like? And does this feel right? And 582 00:26:33,840 --> 00:26:39,159 Speaker 4: convincing yourself? And who the hell knows? And maybe it 583 00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:43,760 Speaker 4: was just my instincts, because I have never heard of 584 00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:46,480 Speaker 4: a more horrific situation than I ended up in in 585 00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,679 Speaker 4: my life, except for like an Ican teena situation like 586 00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:51,800 Speaker 4: this's the only situation where someone's being like physically beaten 587 00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:55,360 Speaker 4: or abused or made to take drugs. I've never heard 588 00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:57,880 Speaker 4: of a worse situation. I was in like a Hall 589 00:26:57,920 --> 00:26:59,720 Speaker 4: of fame ten year divorce on a two year It was. 590 00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:04,480 Speaker 4: It was abuse. It annihilated me, It destroyed me. It 591 00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,840 Speaker 4: was the word I used to heard about my childhood. 592 00:27:06,840 --> 00:27:09,520 Speaker 4: I would watch my mother beaten with a telephone, drag 593 00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:11,600 Speaker 4: down the hall, and I'd call the cops. I was 594 00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:13,920 Speaker 4: going into the Michael Todd room at the playdium, where 595 00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:16,720 Speaker 4: like there was cocaine everywhere at thirteen fourteen, like I 596 00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:19,080 Speaker 4: did not have a normal childhood. I like would wake 597 00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:21,240 Speaker 4: up to bottles all over the house and listen to 598 00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:24,399 Speaker 4: throwing up all day in my house. This divorce was 599 00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:27,639 Speaker 4: it was by far and there's no comparison to It 600 00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:31,119 Speaker 4: was a nightmare. It was torture for a decade of 601 00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:31,600 Speaker 4: my life. 602 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:34,359 Speaker 1: What part of that personal part of your life was 603 00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:37,440 Speaker 1: the the most challenging to sort of see or hear 604 00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:38,880 Speaker 1: being talked about in public. 605 00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:42,680 Speaker 4: No, what was challenging that by any stretch of the imagination, 606 00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:44,879 Speaker 4: it seemed like it would be somehow my fault because 607 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:47,639 Speaker 4: I'm the moneyed spouse, and it would have been a 608 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:50,959 Speaker 4: great quote unquote narrative, the most annoying, unpopular word right 609 00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:54,480 Speaker 4: now that it's like, you know, oh, because I'm a 610 00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:57,480 Speaker 4: big mogul ceo, like you know, the single dad is 611 00:27:57,560 --> 00:27:58,120 Speaker 4: to raise. 612 00:27:57,920 --> 00:27:58,800 Speaker 3: It like it was I was. 613 00:27:58,840 --> 00:28:01,439 Speaker 4: I'm like the best mother and I always have been, 614 00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:03,199 Speaker 4: and there's nobody who's ever questioned that. 615 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:07,280 Speaker 3: And I'm I so to live to use the Demi 616 00:28:07,320 --> 00:28:07,640 Speaker 3: Moor thing. 617 00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:09,840 Speaker 4: I knew her publicist, and I guess that we're going 618 00:28:09,880 --> 00:28:13,000 Speaker 4: through a nasty divorce and like you had to keep quiet, 619 00:28:13,119 --> 00:28:15,240 Speaker 4: just not say anything, and everybody would think everything was 620 00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:17,119 Speaker 4: one way and like one day the truth will come 621 00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,080 Speaker 4: to light. But it was taking a decade for the 622 00:28:19,119 --> 00:28:22,960 Speaker 4: truth to come to light because the divorce wouldn't end. 623 00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:27,440 Speaker 4: And I experienced every single horrendous thing any person could 624 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:30,520 Speaker 4: ever experience. I know I'm hearing about people being abused, 625 00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:32,360 Speaker 4: and I'm here, like I know all the bad things 626 00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:34,720 Speaker 4: that can happen in life and divorce. I'm well educated 627 00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,160 Speaker 4: on the topic. I still don't know anyone who's ever 628 00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:38,240 Speaker 4: had a divorce like I had. 629 00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:42,200 Speaker 2: I am so sorry that you had to go through that. 630 00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:46,360 Speaker 1: I really, I so wish that wasn't true in so 631 00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:50,280 Speaker 1: many ways, and every cell in my body and I 632 00:28:50,360 --> 00:28:53,120 Speaker 1: and I don't know where you got the strength to 633 00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:55,040 Speaker 1: keep going. 634 00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:58,840 Speaker 3: But it destroyed me. I mean, honestly speaking, it destroyed me. 635 00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:02,240 Speaker 4: But but I I was capable during it to be 636 00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:05,160 Speaker 4: aware and to be able to help other people. 637 00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:06,200 Speaker 3: That was yet. 638 00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,200 Speaker 4: Oh but god, that was extruci The whole thing was 639 00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:11,160 Speaker 4: I can't even I'm like the memories of flooding in 640 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:13,560 Speaker 4: but to help to really not just bullshit, like I 641 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:15,959 Speaker 4: can help other people, like really be able to just 642 00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:18,880 Speaker 4: like in a granular sense, help other people, like explain 643 00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:22,120 Speaker 4: to them, detail by detail what to do and what 644 00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:22,680 Speaker 4: not to do. 645 00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:25,400 Speaker 3: So when everyone's asking, are you wedding planning? 646 00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:28,840 Speaker 4: Like Paul is the most amazing person in the world, 647 00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:32,000 Speaker 4: and I graduation, Yeah. 648 00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,400 Speaker 3: But like am I wedding planning? No? I'm not. 649 00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,400 Speaker 2: Don't you love that do you have a date? 650 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:40,360 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm not. We do not. Yeah, I'm not wedding planning. 651 00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:42,840 Speaker 3: I've had a lot of public wedding planning and it 652 00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:44,320 Speaker 3: didn't go that great. 653 00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:48,600 Speaker 1: Well. I think this is all so important for your 654 00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:53,920 Speaker 1: young girl to see what a strong human being and 655 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:58,600 Speaker 1: a good human being her mother is and how hard 656 00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:01,560 Speaker 1: you work at everything that you do. 657 00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:02,160 Speaker 3: Thank you? 658 00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:05,040 Speaker 1: Or is there anything that you're looking forward to doing 659 00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:06,600 Speaker 1: in the years to come? 660 00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:12,080 Speaker 2: You've got a daughter growing up in business ventures? What's 661 00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:13,800 Speaker 2: next for Bethany? 662 00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:17,960 Speaker 4: I just like to feel a sense of peace. You know. 663 00:30:17,080 --> 00:30:21,520 Speaker 4: I don't have big goals. I never have, which is hilarious, 664 00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:24,200 Speaker 4: but I really don't like I just like to feel 665 00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:27,800 Speaker 4: peace and feel rest and feel healthy. I'm enjoying the 666 00:30:27,840 --> 00:30:31,240 Speaker 4: businesses I'm doing now because I'm I'm not like strangling them, 667 00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:33,960 Speaker 4: like I'm going back into the spirits business with the 668 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:38,320 Speaker 4: Forever Young wine. But it's not like it's not like 669 00:30:38,400 --> 00:30:41,120 Speaker 4: I need and need it to happen. I mean it's happening. 670 00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:44,400 Speaker 4: It's a stunning wine and the most perfect brand ever. 671 00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:46,360 Speaker 4: But like I did it because it was the name 672 00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:48,640 Speaker 4: of a song that played at the end of the 673 00:30:48,760 --> 00:30:50,720 Speaker 4: night when I was a cocktail waitress and we did 674 00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:53,840 Speaker 4: Last Call. And because it's called Forever Young, which is 675 00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:56,920 Speaker 4: such a spirit in and of itself, not to mention 676 00:30:57,000 --> 00:31:00,440 Speaker 4: that it's an authentic provence, gorgeous wine and a gorgeous bottle. 677 00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:02,800 Speaker 4: So it's like, I'm a woman who you know, wants 678 00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:04,840 Speaker 4: to sip rose and not just pound cocktails. 679 00:31:04,840 --> 00:31:06,240 Speaker 3: Like it reflects where I am. 680 00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:08,520 Speaker 1: Well. Also, I think if you do, if you approach 681 00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:11,400 Speaker 1: things without such a tight grip of what it has 682 00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:14,560 Speaker 1: to be, there is a stronger flow. If you look 683 00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:17,400 Speaker 1: back at your life, what would you say Your through line. 684 00:31:17,120 --> 00:31:19,280 Speaker 3: Is strength and honesty. 685 00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:20,560 Speaker 2: And honesty takes strength. 686 00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:23,479 Speaker 1: Yeah, and you have both of it, and you're a 687 00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:24,200 Speaker 1: wonderful mother. 688 00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:24,640 Speaker 3: Yeah. 689 00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:27,920 Speaker 2: And I'm going to drink your wine and I'll buy whatever. 690 00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:30,280 Speaker 4: Watch my YouTube series. I actually want you to watch 691 00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:33,760 Speaker 4: my YouTube series and laugh. Tell your daughters too minutes. 692 00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:35,960 Speaker 4: It's like the show. It's the stupid show that you're 693 00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:38,400 Speaker 4: not getting on the short, short content. And then I'm 694 00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:39,920 Speaker 4: not doing on TV because I don't want to answer 695 00:31:39,960 --> 00:31:40,440 Speaker 4: to suits. 696 00:31:44,040 --> 00:31:47,560 Speaker 1: That was the incredible Bethany Frankel. For more from her, 697 00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:52,080 Speaker 1: go listen to her podcast. Just be on the iHeartRadio 698 00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:56,840 Speaker 1: app or wherever you get your shows. Now What with 699 00:31:56,920 --> 00:32:01,040 Speaker 1: Burke Shields is a production of iHeartRadio. Our lead producer 700 00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:05,320 Speaker 1: and wonderful showrunner is Julia Weaver. Additional research and editing 701 00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:10,000 Speaker 1: by Darby Masters and Abu Zafar. Our executive producer is 702 00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:14,120 Speaker 1: Christina Everett. The show is mixed by Bahid Fraser.