Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Garl. Hello
Speaker 1: and Happy holidays, Happy Holidays, Welcome to I Choose Me.
Speaker 1: This podcast is all about making choices, choices that help
Speaker 1: create peace and wholeness for you and the people you love.
Speaker 1: Doesn't that sound good? This year, I have had the
Speaker 1: honor of sitting down with some really incredible guests. I've
Speaker 1: been so lucky to have shared some really powerful stories
Speaker 1: but also some powerful ways to choose yourself during the holidays,
Speaker 1: which can be the hardest time to take care of
Speaker 1: our own needs. Let's be honest before we hear from
Speaker 1: my fab friends Gabrielle Carteris Evett, Nicole Brown, Candace Cameron
Speaker 1: Beret and others. Let me share my very favorite and
Speaker 1: very easy I Choose Me moment for this season and
Speaker 1: something I'm gonna do. Choose a holiday tradition because you
Speaker 1: love it, not because they love it. It could be
Speaker 1: watching your favorite holiday movie because you want to watch it.
Speaker 1: Don't let them pick the movie. It could be a
Speaker 1: recipe that brings back those childhood memories, or maybe you
Speaker 1: know something that's going on in your neighborhood. Pick a
Speaker 1: local Christmas eve service you know with beautiful music just
Speaker 1: make you feel so good. So pick one ritual that
Speaker 1: fills you up and make it non negotiable. Because when
Speaker 1: you anchor yourself in something that brings you real comfort,
Speaker 1: it naturally softens everything else around you. So cheers to
Speaker 1: choosing yourself this holiday. Here are some tips from my
Speaker 1: friends to have a happy and stress free holiday season.
Speaker 1: Candice Cameron Burray, what is the one way that you
Speaker 1: find to choose yourself during the holidays to enjoy the
Speaker 1: holiday amidst all of the chaos of the season.
Speaker 2: That's fun day.
Speaker 1: It's it's hard because Christmas is, especially when you've raised kids,
Speaker 1: it's a lot of work. It's a ton of work,
Speaker 1: and you're tired.
Speaker 2: I think, I know, I can I answer this into
Speaker 2: you choose which answer you want.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay.
Speaker 2: I love decorating my Christmas tree and I usually do
Speaker 2: it on myself because no one wants to help me,
Speaker 2: to be honest, but.
Speaker 3: I love it.
Speaker 2: And so I put a Christmas movie on, which is
Speaker 2: usually White Christmas or like Miracle on thirty four Streets,
Speaker 2: something old, and I just love it, but usually White
Speaker 2: Christmas because I love the dancing in it, and I
Speaker 2: just I just decorate like by myself, no when no
Speaker 2: one else is around, and I like, I love it.
Speaker 2: This makes me really happy during the holidays. The other
Speaker 2: thing I like in that during Christmas time is I
Speaker 2: need everyone to get dressed up. One night. I need
Speaker 2: to put on like the Christmas outfit, and nobody ever
Speaker 2: wants to do that.
Speaker 3: But I don't know why.
Speaker 2: Everyone wants to stay cozy and pjs. But I like
Speaker 2: to get like one night of a holiday Christmas y dressed,
Speaker 2: fancy cocktail night kind of thing. And I don't know.
Speaker 2: I feel like I force everyone to go to something
Speaker 2: during the holidays that they don't want to. So mama
Speaker 2: wants to get dressed up.
Speaker 1: Oh, I think that's great, Jen hat Maker, give me
Speaker 1: one tip, one way we can choose ourselves during the
Speaker 1: holiday season.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, do not be afraid to say no.
Speaker 4: Do not be afraid. You will not ruin everybody's Christmas.
Speaker 4: You will not ruin your Christmas. You will not ruin
Speaker 4: Christmas itself. If something comes up and it feels like
Speaker 4: too much, too long, too far, too hard, too busy,
Speaker 4: you with no equivocation, can say thank you so much
Speaker 4: for inviting me. I cannot I won't be able to
Speaker 4: make that, or I will not be able to put
Speaker 4: up a second Christmas tree this year, or I will
Speaker 4: not be able to be in that gift exchange, or
Speaker 4: I can't come to that party. Thank you, So do
Speaker 4: not be afraid to say no. Everybody is inviting everybody
Speaker 4: to everything everywhere. So I spent a lot of Christmas
Speaker 4: is trying to please everybody who wanted me to be anywhere,
Speaker 4: and it was disastrous. So this is your season. You
Speaker 4: chart your path, You build out your own rhythms in
Speaker 4: a way that feels like delightful to you.
Speaker 1: Perfect Theresa Kabudo, I'm just gonna ask you, how do
Speaker 1: you choose yourself during the craziness of Christmas.
Speaker 5: Oh, I think it's easier now because my kids are old,
Speaker 5: so it's it's easier. But I always put a present
Speaker 5: under the tree from Santa to Teresa.
Speaker 6: You are a smart Oh.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I love I love gifts. I love shopping. I
Speaker 5: just I just I just love things.
Speaker 1: Well, speaking of shopping, be sure to check out your
Speaker 1: beautiful jewelry line Divinely Guided, Finely Guided.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 3: It's so special.
Speaker 5: I mean I really just wanted to create something because
Speaker 5: Heaven and Earth really do meat at the smallest moments,
Speaker 5: and I want everyone to find that. And that's why,
Speaker 5: like even the pieces of wearing tete like this this
Speaker 5: cross that we just it's a for our QBC to
Speaker 5: kind of give people, no matter what faith they are,
Speaker 5: to give them that kind of little their little faith back.
Speaker 1: Just a little reminder.
Speaker 5: This is the let the light impendent.
Speaker 1: Okay, you I got that one. That's the one you
Speaker 1: sent me. That's the light dependent.
Speaker 5: Yeah, because in our darkest times we have to remember
Speaker 5: to let the light in. And this is when the
Speaker 5: light hits this. You can see it like it reflects it,
Speaker 5: but it also comes in and it's surrounded by on
Speaker 5: the top it says grounding strength and power to remind
Speaker 5: ourselves to ground us and that we have the strength
Speaker 5: and power to let the light in even in our
Speaker 5: darkest moment.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I gotta go put it on.
Speaker 5: See and then I'm also wearing what my rosary beats.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, that's so good. How does Evette Nicole
Speaker 1: Brown get through the chaos of the holidays woo.
Speaker 3: By not partaking in any of it?
Speaker 8: I answer, I've heard telling you. I don't. I don't
Speaker 8: trick or treat. I don't dress up for halle Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3: I usually get me a.
Speaker 8: Little smoked turkey breast from a honey baked ham, like
Speaker 8: two weeks before Thanksgiving and make my little meal. And
Speaker 8: by the time everybody else eating Thanksgiving, I've already had
Speaker 8: my turkey and sweet potatoes over and over again. And
Speaker 8: then when it comes to Christmas, you know, I don't
Speaker 8: do the family card, I don't do the year letter.
Speaker 1: I feel repulsed by both of those things.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I just think like I can't. I don't have it.
Speaker 8: I don't remember what happened yesterday. Let alone tell you
Speaker 8: what happened in January and walk you through it.
Speaker 3: And I may have a Christmas tree that's been up
Speaker 3: for two years.
Speaker 1: Oh it's just ready.
Speaker 3: So that song.
Speaker 8: We need a little Christmas right this very minute, going
Speaker 8: to the family room. There's some Christmas body.
Speaker 3: So I honestly do not. I don't deal with any
Speaker 3: of it. I don't do any of it.
Speaker 1: Well, Merry Christmas, happening, all the things forever, we don't
Speaker 1: ever have to talk about it again.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't do it.
Speaker 1: Hard enough, I don't want it, says take it easy
Speaker 1: on yourselves people.
Speaker 3: That's what I'm trying to tell people. Y'all better relax.
Speaker 1: How about you enjoy the day?
Speaker 9: How about.
Speaker 10: All right?
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for spending time with me. I
Speaker 1: really love seeing you.
Speaker 3: Yes, thank you, Brooke Broke.
Speaker 1: What is the one way that you find to separate
Speaker 1: yourself from the chaos that is the holiday season?
Speaker 9: So hard? Holidays have always been madness around my house.
Speaker 9: I bett they're organizing the clean up. I love the
Speaker 9: family time.
Speaker 11: It's hard.
Speaker 9: I feel like my children are older now, so it's
Speaker 9: a little bit less is more. You remember the days
Speaker 9: of trying to do all these We still do stockings,
Speaker 9: by the way, even for my older kids. It's fun
Speaker 9: thing in our house. But letting them really, I guess,
Speaker 9: get involved and make some wishes and get the more
Speaker 9: significant thing instead of a bunch. But I don't compromise
Speaker 9: my wellness around the holidays. I find that yoga is
Speaker 9: my reset, my therapy, it's my medicine. It's calming for me. Lately,
Speaker 9: I'm trying to do one class in the evening because
Speaker 9: it helps me really wind down and drop into a
Speaker 9: greater sleep state. But I'm walking a lot trying to
Speaker 9: take some digestion walks because there's more food, there's more flavors,
Speaker 9: there's more decades we're drinking, like whatever your jam is.
Speaker 9: There's just a lot more going on. And I maybe
Speaker 9: add in a class. It schedule allows during the holidays.
Speaker 9: One of the reasons why I like the app world
Speaker 9: or the digital world, whether it's with me or somebody else,
Speaker 9: even on YouTube, get free content. I don't have to
Speaker 9: drive anywhere or go anywhere. I can kind of say
Speaker 9: thirty forty minutes and it helps me reset so much
Speaker 9: of what I do in fitnesses for my head, my energy,
Speaker 9: and my strap and I'm in a much better mood after.
Speaker 11: That work out.
Speaker 1: That's good for the holidays. Everybody wants mama to be
Speaker 1: happy during the holidays and not straight.
Speaker 9: It's fun. Maybe you'll join us. We do it a
Speaker 9: live stream a turkey burn, a like post turkey sodio
Speaker 9: burn Thanksgiving. So it's really I just do it from
Speaker 9: your own home. But I think fitness has to be fun,
Speaker 9: and it's fun during the holidays to do it with family, friends,
Speaker 9: love and just.
Speaker 3: Take a walk.
Speaker 9: Yeah yeah, just take a walk, move your body.
Speaker 1: Family walks on my list, got it. Gabrielle Carterris. The
Speaker 1: holiday season is here.
Speaker 4: It is upon us.
Speaker 1: What do you do to choose yourself during the holidays
Speaker 1: to keep saying and to truly enjoy them?
Speaker 6: The holidays are not as hard for me to get
Speaker 6: through with peace. So what I say for me enjoy
Speaker 6: whatever to get through peace. Make sure to give time
Speaker 6: to yourself. I find I am committed to it at
Speaker 6: least an hour a day, that's just myself.
Speaker 1: What do you do?
Speaker 6: I get up very early. I get five o'clock. Yeah,
Speaker 6: today was four thirty, but at five o'clock I have
Speaker 6: thirty I try not to go on my phone. Right
Speaker 6: sometimes I do, I go, but I go away from it.
Speaker 6: I have a cup of tea. Sometimes I stand outside
Speaker 6: just to smell the air because I think that's to
Speaker 6: remember where I'm at. And then like today, I woke
Speaker 6: up at six thirty, but when the sun came up
Speaker 6: to quarter seven, because I won't walk outside by myself
Speaker 6: other than I went to start on a three mile
Speaker 6: walk and I just smell the air and I literally
Speaker 6: just live in gratitude in that moment. That's what I
Speaker 6: try to do. And so this holiday will be the
Speaker 6: same thing for me, I'll take that time because I
Speaker 6: will hope to carry with my to my family. But
Speaker 6: for me, because I I'm in a good place with
Speaker 6: my family. We're not all there and I know that,
Speaker 6: but I would say, family or loved ones, take the
Speaker 6: time to see them, don't rush through that moment. Maybe
Speaker 6: even let them know what they do for you in
Speaker 6: your life.
Speaker 3: And just.
Speaker 6: For me, I will be living in gratitude. I feel
Speaker 6: very blessed, and I will shower them all with the
Speaker 6: love that I have. And I love this time of year.
Speaker 1: You're a big entertainer. You must be excited.
Speaker 6: It's gonna be great. I'll have tons of parties on
Speaker 6: everybody for dinner. I just love it. I love cooking
Speaker 6: for everybody. I don't even have to talk. I can
Speaker 6: just like listen to them talk. It makes me very happy.
Speaker 6: It's my my happy place. You're such a giver, very lucky.
Speaker 6: What will you be doing. I get up.
Speaker 1: Earlier now so I have that buff buffer, so that
Speaker 1: I know I have time to not look at my phone.
Speaker 1: Nobody's awake yet, I don't have to deal with anything.
Speaker 6: That's right.
Speaker 1: It's quiet, it's quiet. I usually do a little. I
Speaker 1: learned this from Brook Burk. Do a little red mask
Speaker 1: therapy while I'm meditating in the morning, while I'm thinking
Speaker 1: of the things I'm grateful for.
Speaker 6: Great.
Speaker 1: Then from there great kind of hit the ground running.
Speaker 6: And the busier you get, the more you have to
Speaker 6: take time for yourself. Yes, that's great, Jen, because you
Speaker 6: know what, I really believe this, If you take some
Speaker 6: time to yourself, more time for Jayley and the holidays,
Speaker 6: when you're feeling and you're up against the wall, you'll
Speaker 6: get more done.
Speaker 1: You get more done, You're just more present. And isn't
Speaker 1: that what the holidays are supposed to be about.
Speaker 6: It's because all this is make believe. But even that
Speaker 6: you're doing this stuff, it's all great. Yeah, your family
Speaker 6: and your friends in your life, that's the real truth.
Speaker 6: I'd pray that's what I'm going to think about you.
Speaker 6: But you have that This holiday thank you.
Speaker 1: Isn't Gabrielle the best. My guests shared some beautiful I
Speaker 1: Choose Me moments for the holidays. But the truth is
Speaker 1: these reminders aren't just seasonal. They're kind of like tools
Speaker 1: that help us find peace and wholeness all year long.
Speaker 1: So congratulations for taking this. I choose me moment to
Speaker 1: be with me right now. Here are some more from
Speaker 1: this year's conversations with my amazing and wise friends Jason Priestley.
Speaker 1: What was your last I Choose me moment?
Speaker 12: You know what, I choose me almost every day when
Speaker 12: I go to pilates because it is a totally selfish endeavor.
Speaker 12: And whether I'm going there or I'm just going to
Speaker 12: the gym. You know, I work out six days a week.
Speaker 1: But that's not selfish.
Speaker 3: I got to stop you.
Speaker 1: That's not selfishish.
Speaker 3: It is no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: No, it's not selfish because you have to take care
Speaker 1: of yourself so that you can be there for your
Speaker 1: kids and you have to stay healthy.
Speaker 12: Well, that's true.
Speaker 1: You're taking care of yourself so you can be a
Speaker 1: better caretaker and okay father figure.
Speaker 12: Yes, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1: I don't want you to feel like it's selfish.
Speaker 12: Okay, I don't. I don't think itself is in a
Speaker 12: bad way. But I think it's I feel like it's
Speaker 12: it is. It is a self serving act, you know what.
Speaker 12: You know. I also I also want to keep myself
Speaker 12: in shape so I feel better. Yes, right, I mean,
Speaker 12: I you know, being being there for my kids and
Speaker 12: being a better father for my kids. And it's sort
Speaker 12: of a byproduct, but I feel, you know, I don't
Speaker 12: I don't ever want to be that guy. And I
Speaker 12: was talking to another actor friend of mine about this
Speaker 12: the other night and just talking about, you know, like
Speaker 12: getting older and how you know, as we get older,
Speaker 12: our bodies start eating all our muscle mass, and so
Speaker 12: it's really important to you know, to resistance train and
Speaker 12: keep your skin bag full so you get because if
Speaker 12: you know, once your body eats all its muscle, then
Speaker 12: then your bones start to get brittle and you fall
Speaker 12: over and you break a hip and next thing you know,
Speaker 12: you're you're home sucking a brew. Now that doesn't work there,
Speaker 12: I mean.
Speaker 1: The aging thing. It's good to know that you have
Speaker 1: conversations like that with your friends, because I do too. Yeah,
Speaker 1: conversations I never saw myself having, but they matter. They
Speaker 1: mean something to me. And sharing like knowledge and information
Speaker 1: with people my same age worrying or thinking or focusing
Speaker 1: on this things is so important. Yeah, that's one of
Speaker 1: the reasons I love doing this podcast because we can
Speaker 1: really share a lot of a lot of information with
Speaker 1: a lot of people. And I think you're that message
Speaker 1: of that what you're doing and choosing yourself for yourself
Speaker 1: and as a byproduct for your family, there's nothing wrong.
Speaker 1: That's that's what it's all about, is taking care of
Speaker 1: yourself because guess what nobody else.
Speaker 6: Is going to do it?
Speaker 1: Goshcha Oliver Hudson, how do you find your own peace
Speaker 1: and wholeness? What was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 13: Mmmm?
Speaker 7: This, it's a good question.
Speaker 1: The last time you said I'm gonna do this for myself.
Speaker 7: I choose Okay. This is great because I think there
Speaker 7: are little things. I think you have to choose yourself
Speaker 7: at times, many times in the day, little things I
Speaker 7: really do I'm going to take this more for myself.
Speaker 7: They're the big ones. But I think every day you
Speaker 7: have to You have to choose yourself, even if you
Speaker 7: have kids, even if you're busy, even if you're you know,
Speaker 7: in a workplace. There are the moments where you're choosing
Speaker 7: you every day. You have to find that, you know.
Speaker 7: I think my big choose me moment was probably in November.
Speaker 7: I go on these big fishing trips. Ten days I'm
Speaker 7: out to see you can barely get a hold of
Speaker 7: me and leave out of San Diego. I'm on a boat.
Speaker 7: Don't get off the boat near in the middle of
Speaker 7: the ocean, just catching tuna and with the twenty eight people,
Speaker 7: you know, random people who now I know after being
Speaker 7: on this specific trip. And again, Aaron's amazing and she
Speaker 7: knows it's a passion of mine. But you know, I'm
Speaker 7: choosing that this is something that I need to do.
Speaker 7: It's personal. I love it, it's cleansing. It's the most as
Speaker 7: cathartic as you can get in the middle of the ocean,
Speaker 7: doing what I love to do and just separating, you know.
Speaker 7: So that was my last like choose me moment. And
Speaker 7: I'm gone for ten plus days, and it's it's a
Speaker 7: long time to be away from the family when I'm
Speaker 7: not working, and you know, I do it all well,
Speaker 7: it fills you up here.
Speaker 14: Oh my gosh, yeah.
Speaker 7: One hundred percent. And then her, she has hers too.
Speaker 7: You know, she's big on her friends, and she goes
Speaker 7: to sleepovers, you know, for two or three nights and
Speaker 7: I'm with the kids, or you know, she just did
Speaker 7: a whole trip to New York with all of her
Speaker 7: girlfriends for four nights, you know, and you know, I
Speaker 7: think relating it to relationships, you have to let your
Speaker 7: partner have those choose me moments whenever the hell they want,
Speaker 7: you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've learned that kind of the hard way. I
Speaker 1: used to be like I felt left out. I don't
Speaker 1: know if that's jealousy. I felt. I would feel left out,
Speaker 1: I would feel like unincluded, like you know, I had
Speaker 1: all those very unhelpful feelings. And then something just sort
Speaker 1: of changed where I was like, Okay, you are your
Speaker 1: own person. You have your own needs, and I have
Speaker 1: my own needs, and there's nothing wrong with each of
Speaker 1: us having the things that you know, fill us up
Speaker 1: and they don't. They're not always going to be the
Speaker 1: same things. Of course, of course we're different people.
Speaker 7: Yeah, one pillar, that codependency. That one. If you're going
Speaker 7: to hold up a big stone, you know, slab, one
Speaker 7: pillar right there's going to be effected, the wind might blow.
Speaker 7: That ship is much easier, it's easier, going to be
Speaker 7: easier to tip. And that's the codependency. If you've got two,
Speaker 7: that ship is going to stand strong, you know what
Speaker 7: I mean, whether that's family, relationship, whatever it is. You know,
Speaker 7: that's why you need to have separate lives. You need
Speaker 7: to have dependent and relationships independent of each other gets
Speaker 7: way too messy. And I've seen it so much with
Speaker 7: friends or it's like a dear but what it's up,
Speaker 7: you know, like you need to have your own ship.
Speaker 7: I mean it's so important and refreshing and you know
Speaker 7: it's energizing.
Speaker 1: Chelsea Hand. I know you've worked so hard this year.
Speaker 1: How have you learned to choose yourself anytime?
Speaker 15: Now that I'm resistant towards anything, I just go for it.
Speaker 11: I'm like, oh, yes, you have.
Speaker 14: To do it.
Speaker 13: Like I'm really bad at dancing, and I'm decided I'm
Speaker 13: just going to start dancing.
Speaker 3: I'm very self conscious.
Speaker 5: I know I'm a bad dancer, and i feel like
Speaker 5: everyone's staring at me, and I'm like, you know what,
Speaker 5: this is good. You're going to start dancing at fifty
Speaker 5: and it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: That you were kind of dancing just like solo dancing,
Speaker 1: any dancing.
Speaker 2: Like I can't even dance to a beat, like at
Speaker 2: the tailor shoone, like just go two step and you
Speaker 2: feel like you.
Speaker 1: Want to dance, but you hold yourself back because it's
Speaker 1: not nobody needs to see that.
Speaker 13: Yes, yeah, totally like self conscious It's like, my self
Speaker 13: conscious thing is my dancing, and.
Speaker 1: You should be free to just dance. I'm happy you
Speaker 1: get to dance the whole year of your I no.
Speaker 5: I'm gonna I'm gonna start dancing and not care what
Speaker 5: anyone thinks.
Speaker 1: I love this. This is good.
Speaker 13: Yeah, because I need I need new challenges, you know,
Speaker 13: need something else to like be like, Okay, this is
Speaker 13: I haven't done.
Speaker 1: I haven't done a lot of acting work recently.
Speaker 11: I'm going to do that decided.
Speaker 8: I'm like, I'm going to do stuff that isn't in
Speaker 8: my comfort zone.
Speaker 1: It's like a beauty of it.
Speaker 15: Yeah.
Speaker 13: I feel like fifty is like a reset, like a reset,
Speaker 13: like okay.
Speaker 3: Now let me go around.
Speaker 13: It's like you're going back into the hotel room to
Speaker 13: look and see what you forgot right before you check out.
Speaker 3: You're like, okay, you let me do one more.
Speaker 1: Past my embiolic. You inspire so many people every day.
Speaker 1: What was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 10: Wow?
Speaker 14: What was my last I choose me moment?
Speaker 3: You know?
Speaker 14: I was supposed to go to a screening Friday night
Speaker 14: to support a friend of mine, and I really wasn't
Speaker 14: feeling well. I was listening to my body. And it
Speaker 14: was so hard because everything in me was like, go,
Speaker 14: you'll be fine, it's okay, blah blah blah, like all
Speaker 14: the things like what will they think of me?
Speaker 3: What will like this?
Speaker 14: And I built it up so much and I finally
Speaker 14: said to this friend, I was honest. I said I'm
Speaker 14: not feeling well and I'm very sorry. I'm not going
Speaker 14: to be able to come. And his response was like,
Speaker 14: I know how much you love and support me. It's
Speaker 14: totally fine. What I'm most excited about is that you're
Speaker 14: taking care of yourself.
Speaker 16: Oh, and it doesn't always work like that.
Speaker 14: A lot of times you'll stand up for yourself and
Speaker 14: people will be like, you let me down?
Speaker 4: Why not this?
Speaker 14: But it was like a great It was a message
Speaker 14: from the universe giving me permission to literally listen to
Speaker 14: my body.
Speaker 1: And it was like, there's just yeah.
Speaker 14: And it didn't just make me feel better that I
Speaker 14: didn't have to like go out late at night to
Speaker 14: this thing.
Speaker 3: It was that I.
Speaker 14: Got that elevator lift feeling for myself, like oh, you're
Speaker 14: allowed to advocate for yourself and if you don't feel good,
Speaker 14: it's okay. That was a really big one you know,
Speaker 14: I watched Family Feud and went to bed.
Speaker 1: Oh good night. That's a good night. And that's the
Speaker 1: whole point of this podcast. And what I talk about
Speaker 1: is that letting people know that it is okay to
Speaker 1: choose themselves. And you choose yourself, and you also realized
Speaker 1: in that moment, oh, choosing myself feels really good. Ever, Carodane,
Speaker 1: what was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 16: I've been thinking about this a lot good.
Speaker 3: And I have two.
Speaker 16: On my I choose me is my garden.
Speaker 11: I don't have a gardener.
Speaker 16: I do our gardening. I do our planting, I do
Speaker 16: our trimming, and so like, if I find myself sort
Speaker 16: of in the La crazies or spinning, I will just
Speaker 16: put my gardening gloves on and my clogs and prune
Speaker 16: and weed and we have sort of like a little
Speaker 16: English garden and I'm proud of it and I love
Speaker 16: how it makes me feel. The other day I did
Speaker 16: it barefoot. I was like, maybe that'll be like grounding.
Speaker 16: Maybe it's like yeah thing or something like that. That
Speaker 16: and then the other thing I did I sort of
Speaker 16: was it's so funny when someone's like, what's your choose me?
Speaker 16: And you're like, I don't know. I have kids.
Speaker 1: I choose them, A lot of people say.
Speaker 16: But at the end of twenty twenty three, I sort of,
Speaker 16: you know how, everyone on social media posts like these
Speaker 16: are the books I read this year and Obama's list,
Speaker 16: and I'm like, Obama read fifty five books? Like what
Speaker 16: am I doing with my time? So at the beginning
Speaker 16: of twenty four I started a book group and the
Speaker 16: goal was a book a month. And the book group
Speaker 16: is kicking ass, and it's this incredible group of like
Speaker 16: it's like ten to fifteen of us. We meet every
Speaker 16: month and we read a book or two a month
Speaker 16: and it's totally awesome and it is a non negotiable.
Speaker 16: I have book group on the first Wednesday of every
Speaker 16: month period. End of story.
Speaker 9: That's mine.
Speaker 1: I love that. Who's in your book group?
Speaker 16: Who's in my book group? But there's a lot of
Speaker 16: people in my book girl you might know as Meredith
Speaker 16: Salinger is in my book group, Meredithsealeah, and then a
Speaker 16: lot of moms who I've met over the years, either
Speaker 16: through preschool or school. And then some other women in
Speaker 16: the book group brought in a friend and we all
Speaker 16: just sort of mesh great, it's been really it's I
Speaker 16: highly recommend a book.
Speaker 1: What book are you reading right now?
Speaker 7: Then?
Speaker 16: Currently we are reading two books because we're like that.
Speaker 1: I know, we're reading over Achievers.
Speaker 16: I know, we just read East of Eden. So we're
Speaker 16: sort of revisiting some classics, which if you haven't read,
Speaker 16: I really.
Speaker 1: It's been a million.
Speaker 16: It's really good. We read it during the fires, and
Speaker 16: it's really a love letter to California. We're reading House
Speaker 16: of Mirth, and then we're reading a collection of essays
Speaker 16: by a friend called Mothers and Other fictional Characters, which
Speaker 16: is also wonderful. And I know the author, Nicole, and
Speaker 16: so she's going to zoom in at our next book
Speaker 16: group and we're all going to get to kind of
Speaker 16: chat with her about her memoir.
Speaker 1: Oh that's exciting, fun, right, it's fun. I love it
Speaker 1: that you did that. I heard that if you read
Speaker 1: a book for even twenty minutes a day, it has
Speaker 1: such significant help of your mental health.
Speaker 16: Absolutely, and like you know a lot of us, I
Speaker 16: feel like, and I say this with no judgment, Like
Speaker 16: end of the day, I'd be sitting on the chair
Speaker 16: looking at my.
Speaker 1: Phone and I was like scrolling.
Speaker 3: Oh, but I want my.
Speaker 16: Kids to see me doing so. I really make an
Speaker 16: effort to just at the end of the day for
Speaker 16: fifteen minutes or a chapter and just sit out there
Speaker 16: and then if they need something, they come out. When
Speaker 16: they find me, I have a book in my hand
Speaker 16: and my phone.
Speaker 1: I love that. You just inspired me. Thank you. Yes,
Speaker 1: I'm going to pick up a book instead of my
Speaker 1: phone today when I have it.
Speaker 16: Like ten minutes do it?
Speaker 1: I see mets before I let you go. What was
Speaker 1: your last I choose me moment? Oh oh oh could
Speaker 1: be today, It could be yesterday, I.
Speaker 11: Can yeah, yeah, for sure. I think it was getting
Speaker 11: up and going to the gym, right, Like I chose that,
Speaker 11: like I didn't want to me afterward, but starting to day.
Speaker 11: That is a little in my little bank, my confidence bank,
Speaker 11: or my choosing myself bank, for sure, take a little.
Speaker 1: How do you do that when you're working all the time.
Speaker 1: It's you know, I hear people that get up at
Speaker 1: four am, five am.
Speaker 11: What I'm like, what, Well, you know, what's weird? I
Speaker 11: had no qualms about getting up at four am to
Speaker 11: go to set, so okay, so what okay is it?
Speaker 11: Because like I can do it for the people why
Speaker 11: can't do it for myself?
Speaker 1: You're doing You're doing it because that's your job, right,
Speaker 1: But taking care of yourself is your job.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 11: Yeah, so I had to really shift that perspective. I
Speaker 11: was like, oh no, like Christy, and as we know,
Speaker 11: like spending eighteen hours on the set, you've got to
Speaker 11: be in somewhat sort of shape for the endurance to
Speaker 11: you know, a long day and what you're doing as well.
Speaker 15: Yeah.
Speaker 11: So I think for today, like that was certainly something
Speaker 11: I started my day with and it sets the tone.
Speaker 6: Yep.
Speaker 1: It definitely like revs yup for the rest of your day.
Speaker 9: Right.
Speaker 1: I love that feeling.
Speaker 11: Yeah, I know. I'm like, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 8: She did it.
Speaker 1: Oh Molly Sims, what was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 3: I think I choose.
Speaker 10: It's gonna make me cry, It's okay, I think instead
Speaker 10: of I choose me, I chose us.
Speaker 1: What does that mean to you?
Speaker 10: Just having that, you know, the beginning of being able
Speaker 10: to say no to things, to say yes to us,
Speaker 10: to say yes to me, to to I choose me
Speaker 10: to You know, that's not going to really work for
Speaker 10: me right now. And those are really hard words because
Speaker 10: I love. I'm from the South. I love to please everyone.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and.
Speaker 10: You know, I've lost some friends along the way because
Speaker 10: I really couldn't do any more than what I was doing.
Speaker 9: You know.
Speaker 10: I think with COVID, the fires, you know, losing my
Speaker 10: mom and dad, I I cautiously had to take a
Speaker 10: step back to choose me.
Speaker 9: Yeah.
Speaker 1: How does that feel?
Speaker 10: I mean uncomfortable, you know, really, you know, I you know,
Speaker 10: I love when people be like, oh, she's not going
Speaker 10: to do that. Like Michael, who's my publicist on this
Speaker 10: podcast listening right now, He's like, you know what, she's
Speaker 10: going to not do it right now, We're going to
Speaker 10: revisit this. And like I was like, oh god, I
Speaker 10: think you thank you for saying that, you know, like
Speaker 10: just really trying to choose me, right, like having people
Speaker 10: around me that help me choose me, because if not,
Speaker 10: I'm like, you know, I'll just be like, oh I'll
Speaker 10: help you do okay, Yeah, no worries, just call me,
Speaker 10: I'll interview like oh, well, you know, I but at
Speaker 10: choosing me has been a lifesaver in a lot of
Speaker 10: ways because there's only so much I can do. I
Speaker 10: have to be there for my kids. I only have
Speaker 10: so much band with But it takes a lot of honesty, right,
Speaker 10: it takes a lot of And I used to do
Speaker 10: this as like when I would work and come like
Speaker 10: I'm sure you did, when you would come off a
Speaker 10: show or you'd come off a stint, or you'd come
Speaker 10: off you know, six weeks, ten weeks, three months, you know,
Speaker 10: because you did network television, so you were on what
Speaker 10: twenty three twenty four episodes was yearly, year round, right,
Speaker 10: So when you go on those marathon runs and you stop,
Speaker 10: it's like, hey, you.
Speaker 3: Don't even know what to do with your no.
Speaker 10: And b you know, for you then you had three
Speaker 10: young girls with Peter and both of your like it
Speaker 10: just it gets crazy. Yeah, it's crazy, and then life
Speaker 10: happens in top of it. So I think I choose me.
Speaker 10: I've chosen me. I choose me in those moments because
Speaker 10: I have to do.
Speaker 1: You feel like it's you choosing to reconnect with yourself
Speaker 1: and your truth instead of.
Speaker 10: Yeah, yeah, we just level it out, we least balance it,
Speaker 10: we balance it out. We kind of start back to zero,
Speaker 10: you know. I did I do acupuncture and I'm like, girl,
Speaker 10: I was like, I don't know, I can't sleep anymore.
Speaker 10: I'm like sweat and like and I was like, you
Speaker 10: know all the things that you're going through, and I
Speaker 10: was like, I was like, You've got to help me.
Speaker 10: I'm like, I just can't sleep. Literally, like in thirty seconds.
Speaker 11: She left my room.
Speaker 14: I was I was like snoring right.
Speaker 10: Like I just needed someone to like just call me.
Speaker 10: That has been really good for me in my sense
Speaker 10: of just sense of getting back grounded and just have
Speaker 10: it again. That's an hour and fifteen minutes just for me.
Speaker 10: I took a walk the other day and I'm like,
Speaker 10: I'm not gonna go to that sports thing and they
Speaker 10: were so upsetting.
Speaker 7: What do you mean?
Speaker 3: What do you mean you're not gonna go.
Speaker 10: I'm like, kids, Mom's gonna take a walk and I'm
Speaker 10: not gonna call you. I'm not gonna talk to you.
Speaker 10: I don't don't care how you do. I'm just gonna
Speaker 10: go take a walk.
Speaker 9: You know.
Speaker 10: But those check ins are important.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you got to listen to your needs. You gotta
Speaker 1: put yourself first sometimes. And I'm so happy to hear
Speaker 1: that you're doing that because it's vital. Tammeron Hall, what
Speaker 1: was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 13: Oh, that's a great one. Oh my last she use
Speaker 13: me moment?
Speaker 4: Oh it was this morning.
Speaker 13: So yesterday I had a very early morning and I
Speaker 13: had a very intimidating thing that I had to face
Speaker 13: and it took a lot of I actually that shy
Speaker 13: kid and me showed up yesterday and I had to
Speaker 13: deal with her and do this event that I wasn't
Speaker 13: prepared for.
Speaker 3: Proud of me.
Speaker 13: So this morning, when it was time to wake up
Speaker 13: and get my son ready for school, I fought mom
Speaker 13: guilt as if one morning of not getting him ready
Speaker 13: versus his dad was going to somehow change the trajectory
Speaker 13: of his entire life. And I laid in bed and
Speaker 13: I did it. Get up and I let my husband
Speaker 13: warm the carrot muffin, And not that he wouldn't, but
Speaker 13: sometimes even when he's willing to will when he does
Speaker 13: do it. And he does it every morning with me.
Speaker 13: But I feel guilty if I don't not out there,
Speaker 13: like if I'm not you know.
Speaker 7: Give me the kids, you know.
Speaker 13: And I was like, my kid knows he loves me
Speaker 13: and I love him, and I'm going to stay in
Speaker 13: this bid.
Speaker 11: Have a good day, kiddout.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's a good one. Just stay in bed,
Speaker 1: Bill Rosenthal, what was your last I Choose me moment?
Speaker 15: Oh?
Speaker 7: I guess right before I got on with you, which
Speaker 7: is a very good I choose me moment. Talk to you.
Speaker 9: Uh, I was on the elliptical for a half hour.
Speaker 3: That great, Right, So.
Speaker 15: Not only do I do weights in the morning, but
Speaker 15: I find another spot if I want to watch TV.
Speaker 1: Don't just sit there, get get up and move a
Speaker 1: little bit. Make you do feel better? Yeah, move, move,
Speaker 1: move a little yeah. Yeah. Holly Madison, what was your
Speaker 1: last I choose me moment?
Speaker 15: This is just so simple and silly, but I just
Speaker 15: have to choose to enjoy life because I'm really achievement oriented,
Speaker 15: and I tend to throughout my life go through different
Speaker 15: phases of like having anxiety of not having achieved enough,
Speaker 15: or I'm not on track or I haven't done this yet.
Speaker 15: And every day like I'm looking at it right now
Speaker 15: because I'm sitting in front of my window, like I
Speaker 15: love my backyard. It's so pretty, and every day almost
Speaker 15: I take a picture of it and I post up
Speaker 15: my Instagram story and I'm like, it's a perfect day.
Speaker 15: And I just remind myself to like choose to love
Speaker 15: life every day because you could have the most amazing life,
Speaker 15: which I feel like I do, and still fall into
Speaker 15: this weird funk where you feel like you don't have enough,
Speaker 15: you're not achieving enough, and no, no, you just have
Speaker 15: to choose to love life.
Speaker 11: So that's mine.
Speaker 1: I Choose Me moment, and there you have it. Happy
Speaker 1: Holidays from I Choose Me. We love you. Thank you
Speaker 1: for being here and for listening, and especially for choosing
Speaker 1: yourself with me.