WEBVTT - Love at First Sight 0:00:03.120 --> 0:00:06.000 Welcome to Stuff to Blow your Mind from how Stuff 0:00:06.000 --> 0:00:13.560 Works dot com. Hey you welcome to Stuff to Blow 0:00:13.600 --> 0:00:15.760 your Mind. My name is Robert Lamb and I'm Julie 0:00:15.760 --> 0:00:18.920 Douglas and we're coming off of Valentine's Day here, but 0:00:19.760 --> 0:00:24.599 the war still sort of continuing. Um. We rolled through 0:00:25.160 --> 0:00:30.040 five or six topics on Valentine, the issues from the 0:00:30.080 --> 0:00:33.720 science of lingerie to uh to what happens in a 0:00:33.720 --> 0:00:36.519 passionate kiss, to the color pink. The color pink and 0:00:36.560 --> 0:00:39.280 what it's hiding. Yeah, and it's hiding hiding quite a 0:00:39.280 --> 0:00:42.040 bit as we explored. But today we're gonna we're gonna 0:00:42.080 --> 0:00:45.680 really tackle the final piece of the puzzle and and 0:00:45.760 --> 0:00:50.360 one of the big tropes about romantic love, love at 0:00:50.479 --> 0:00:54.560 first sight. Yes, I saw him from across the room. 0:00:54.600 --> 0:00:57.680 He looked at me. I looked at him. Sparks flew 0:00:58.400 --> 0:01:03.800 were married just hours later. Is that your story? But 0:01:03.960 --> 0:01:06.319 you know that's a big Hollywood trope, you know, like 0:01:06.360 --> 0:01:09.360 the you're in a bar, you're somewhere across the room 0:01:09.440 --> 0:01:14.360 and uh, you know you lock eyes. Time stands still, Yes, yes, 0:01:14.400 --> 0:01:17.360 you're outside of time all of a sudden. Um. And 0:01:17.360 --> 0:01:21.200 that's not to say that love at first sight couldn't exist. 0:01:21.280 --> 0:01:25.440 I suppose there's a possibility, but in some ways, today's 0:01:25.520 --> 0:01:28.319 episode is a bit of a trojan horse, like we're saying, hey, 0:01:28.400 --> 0:01:31.399 just love it, first sight exists. But really, what's inside 0:01:31.400 --> 0:01:34.920 that trojan horse is this idea that when you do 0:01:35.120 --> 0:01:39.160 walk eyes, there's a kind of autobiography of things going 0:01:39.280 --> 0:01:42.319 on to that leading up to that moment that are 0:01:42.400 --> 0:01:45.440 influencing the way that you're even locking eyes with that 0:01:45.480 --> 0:01:48.760 person and assessing them, and that there's probably a lot 0:01:48.840 --> 0:01:54.800 more going on than just this instant, palpable chemistry. Indeed, 0:01:54.880 --> 0:01:57.560 now I think it's probably a good good point in 0:01:57.560 --> 0:01:59.920 the podcast to just sort of establish our own take 0:02:00.200 --> 0:02:02.720 on this. Going into it, I definitely thought might take 0:02:03.120 --> 0:02:07.120 changed a bit and exploring the information. But where where 0:02:07.160 --> 0:02:09.400 were you on the idea of love at first sight 0:02:10.240 --> 0:02:13.600 prior to this research? Well, I always feel like this 0:02:13.680 --> 0:02:18.880 is just a case of semantics like love, lust, intrigue, interest, 0:02:19.200 --> 0:02:20.880 you know, these are all sorts of things that come 0:02:20.919 --> 0:02:23.280 up when you're in a room and there are strangers, 0:02:23.280 --> 0:02:25.920 and there's always an excitement when you do lock eyes 0:02:25.960 --> 0:02:28.200 with someone that you feel like you have a connection with. 0:02:28.919 --> 0:02:31.640 So for me, I've never thought of it as like 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:33.560 this sort of you know, you just got swept off 0:02:33.560 --> 0:02:36.639 your feet and you locked eyes thing. Okay, Yeah, I 0:02:36.880 --> 0:02:39.600 feel like for my part, it's definitely a trope that 0:02:39.680 --> 0:02:42.200 I always kind of looked down on a bit. And 0:02:42.240 --> 0:02:44.360 maybe even if I was feeling a bit hot on 0:02:44.400 --> 0:02:47.440 the topic, I would say that the idea of love 0:02:47.480 --> 0:02:52.920 at first sight cheapens love and and and yeah, just 0:02:52.960 --> 0:02:56.600 kind of cheapens that the real sustained love that one 0:02:56.680 --> 0:02:58.680 has that you build over time. You know. It's kind 0:02:58.720 --> 0:03:01.040 of like saying, hey took me ten years to paint. 0:03:01.040 --> 0:03:03.560 Look at this painting I did, and then someone said, hey, 0:03:03.639 --> 0:03:06.160 yeah I just learned to paint and I made a masterpiece. 0:03:06.200 --> 0:03:09.920 You know, No, you didn't make a masterpiece like the 0:03:09.960 --> 0:03:12.239 thing that I've been building all this time. Like this 0:03:12.440 --> 0:03:15.239 is surely more substantial to than this, you know, brief 0:03:15.280 --> 0:03:18.400 look at a bar and yeah, there there's some things 0:03:18.440 --> 0:03:20.120 to that. It is. Yeah, that's the thing about it. 0:03:20.160 --> 0:03:22.280 Like now, having looked at the research which we're going 0:03:22.320 --> 0:03:25.280 to discuss in earnest here, Uh, you know, I I 0:03:25.320 --> 0:03:27.679 have to give a little more credence to the idea 0:03:28.040 --> 0:03:30.639 or at least the experience of love at first sight. 0:03:30.680 --> 0:03:33.560 I'm not saying I'm at this point, I'm no longer 0:03:33.600 --> 0:03:35.640 going to say you were not feeling love at first sight. 0:03:35.640 --> 0:03:37.120 All right, you were feeling something. And if you want 0:03:37.120 --> 0:03:40.160 to classify his love at first sight, it could have 0:03:40.200 --> 0:03:42.840 been something and it bloomed into love. Is that what 0:03:42.840 --> 0:03:45.720 I'm getting from you? Yeah? Yeah, okay, all right, Well, 0:03:45.960 --> 0:03:48.600 before we kind of go into the different aspects of this, 0:03:48.720 --> 0:03:51.480 I just wanted to roll out some statistics. There's a 0:03:51.480 --> 0:03:54.760 two thousand Gallop poll that found that while so many 0:03:55.320 --> 0:03:57.480 Americans believe that there is such a thing as the 0:03:57.520 --> 0:04:02.520 one true love, overall, only of people think love could 0:04:02.520 --> 0:04:07.160 occur at first glance. And here's the interesting thing about this. Um, 0:04:07.200 --> 0:04:11.200 if you break this down by gendercent of men think 0:04:11.360 --> 0:04:18.080 that there's love at first sight compared to women. It's 0:04:18.080 --> 0:04:22.760 a slight uptick, but it's an uptick. Nonetheless, it seems significant. 0:04:22.800 --> 0:04:25.760 I mean especially you know, if you're standing outside of 0:04:25.760 --> 0:04:29.760 the figures, one might one might be tempted to expect 0:04:29.760 --> 0:04:33.240 the female percentage to be higher. You know, well, I 0:04:33.240 --> 0:04:38.559 think that would be the stereotype. Women just can't help 0:04:38.800 --> 0:04:42.279 love and love, right, But um, maybe it's a situation 0:04:42.320 --> 0:04:44.960 of the stereotype exists, and men are more likely to 0:04:45.040 --> 0:04:48.080 buy into the stereotype, and women of course know that, 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:51.119 having the brain of women know that it's not quite 0:04:51.160 --> 0:04:53.560 so cut and dry. I don't know. I just don't 0:04:53.560 --> 0:04:59.240 even know now, A Lea Malik Pines. A psychologist Ben 0:04:59.320 --> 0:05:02.480 Gearing on your university in Israel, found in a survey 0:05:02.520 --> 0:05:05.080 that a small fraction eleven percent of people in long 0:05:05.160 --> 0:05:10.159 term relationships said that they began their courtships with love 0:05:10.320 --> 0:05:14.680 at first sight. So that's that is pretty small, and 0:05:14.720 --> 0:05:17.760 that's just that area. And and particularly there's a sort 0:05:17.800 --> 0:05:20.159 of cultural lens to you that we're looking at things 0:05:21.000 --> 0:05:23.120 when we talk about love at first sight. But still 0:05:23.160 --> 0:05:25.280 there are some people who say that's that's how my 0:05:25.360 --> 0:05:29.840 relationship began and begun. Is key here because as we're 0:05:29.839 --> 0:05:32.039 going to discuss a lot of this falls into the 0:05:32.080 --> 0:05:36.719 into an exploration of the timeline of romantic attachment, the 0:05:36.760 --> 0:05:40.840 timeline of say, any successful or doomed relationship, however you 0:05:40.839 --> 0:05:43.120 want to look at it and how it transpires and 0:05:43.120 --> 0:05:45.640 then how we look back at it. Yeah, and timeline 0:05:45.680 --> 0:05:48.760 is important. I'm glad that you brought that up to you, because, um, 0:05:48.800 --> 0:05:51.240 when we talk about love at first sight. Again, it's 0:05:51.240 --> 0:05:54.680 a case of semantics, because if you look at someone's work, 0:05:54.800 --> 0:05:59.359 like biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, she might say, Okay, that 0:05:59.480 --> 0:06:01.560 could be of at first sight a couple of seconds 0:06:01.640 --> 0:06:04.600 up to maybe three minutes, depending on what's going on 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:08.320 in the brain and how primed the brain is. And this, 0:06:08.320 --> 0:06:11.120 this is where we really need to turn to you know, 0:06:11.240 --> 0:06:13.360 some good old m r Eyes and take a look 0:06:13.440 --> 0:06:16.360 into the brain to figure out what's going on. Indeed, 0:06:16.360 --> 0:06:18.840 so let's go back to that sort of the bar trope, right, 0:06:19.040 --> 0:06:23.080 Like what's happening when person a in person be suddenly 0:06:23.120 --> 0:06:25.839 locked glances and there's that magical moment and the music 0:06:25.880 --> 0:06:30.080 starts up. It could be it could be some music, 0:06:30.560 --> 0:06:33.560 but essentially what's happening is your your your eyes are 0:06:33.600 --> 0:06:36.360 locking on, but your brain is locking on to a target. 0:06:36.400 --> 0:06:38.400 It's like it's like a scene in Top Gun right 0:06:38.440 --> 0:06:40.839 where the you're you're trying to lock the missiles before 0:06:40.839 --> 0:06:45.400 you fire the heat seeking missile at the enemy. MiG right, um, 0:06:45.440 --> 0:06:50.840 Except when our brains do this, we're sucking away from 0:06:51.040 --> 0:06:56.320 other faculties. Were sucking away Environmental stimuli are processing of time. 0:06:57.000 --> 0:06:58.800 We're using some of the same parts of the brain 0:06:58.839 --> 0:07:01.600 that are also involved in time and perception. So it 0:07:01.640 --> 0:07:04.640 begins to it feels like time is standing still. It 0:07:04.680 --> 0:07:07.599 feels like everything else is sort of fading, uh into 0:07:07.640 --> 0:07:10.640 the periphery, because it sort of is from from just 0:07:10.760 --> 0:07:15.000 a computational side of things. Yeah, especially if you consider 0:07:15.280 --> 0:07:17.280 what is going on with the chemistry in the brain. 0:07:17.280 --> 0:07:19.920 Because as I had mentioned before, you're in the room 0:07:20.000 --> 0:07:22.560 full of people who are strangers, there's already an element 0:07:22.640 --> 0:07:27.600 of intrigue. You lock those eyes, and maybe when you 0:07:27.720 --> 0:07:30.520 do that, that triggers the release of dopamine in the 0:07:30.560 --> 0:07:34.960 brain's reward system, which in turn may motivate you to 0:07:35.200 --> 0:07:38.080 approach that person. Because if we've learned anything about dopamine 0:07:38.120 --> 0:07:40.960 in the reward system, we know that, um, there's kind 0:07:40.960 --> 0:07:44.400 of bread crumb trail being made here, and the more 0:07:44.480 --> 0:07:48.080 you can revisit it and get more things of that dopamine, well, 0:07:48.200 --> 0:07:50.680 the happier your reward system is. So hey, why not 0:07:50.760 --> 0:07:53.320 go and then talk to that person and see if 0:07:53.360 --> 0:07:56.880 you can increase the dopamine in your brain. Yeah, all 0:07:57.000 --> 0:07:59.840 under the dress of elation, passion and this and this 0:08:00.120 --> 0:08:03.640 cultural idea of romantic love, right, Yeah, and that's kind 0:08:03.640 --> 0:08:06.480 of what is setting the stage for your brain for 0:08:06.520 --> 0:08:09.920 this idea of love. Because if you look at this 0:08:10.080 --> 0:08:13.200 meta analysis study, it's called the Neuroimaging of Love and 0:08:13.240 --> 0:08:18.240 it was conducted by Syracuse University's professor Stephanie Ortiga. It 0:08:18.360 --> 0:08:22.600 found that when people are engaged in this sense of love, um, 0:08:22.640 --> 0:08:25.080 that there are twelve areas of the brain that work 0:08:25.160 --> 0:08:31.000 together to release euphoria inducing chemicals like dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline, 0:08:31.040 --> 0:08:35.520 and that's oppressing and then that's what is culminating to 0:08:35.600 --> 0:08:41.280 express that feeling of love. And according to this meta analysis, 0:08:41.280 --> 0:08:44.920 this can happen as early as point two seconds of 0:08:45.040 --> 0:08:49.000 visual contact. All right, so you're locking in on target 0:08:49.160 --> 0:08:51.880 and you can can even think of the dopamine kicking 0:08:51.920 --> 0:08:54.760 in the various other alk hormones were mentioning. It's kind 0:08:54.760 --> 0:08:57.960 of the the ignition behind the heat seeking missile, like 0:08:58.200 --> 0:09:03.160 go out there, go to the next stage, right. Um. 0:09:03.200 --> 0:09:05.600 And it's also interesting in this study they pointed out 0:09:05.640 --> 0:09:11.200 that these euphoria inducing drugs that are suggesting love, Um, 0:09:11.440 --> 0:09:16.160 it's akin to using cocaine. Yeah, And uh, that's what's 0:09:16.160 --> 0:09:20.160 interesting about this. There's, uh, this idea that newly found 0:09:20.280 --> 0:09:24.920 love sparks in areas of the brain that are associated 0:09:24.920 --> 0:09:29.280 with euphoria inducing drugs. So that's that's that feeling of cocaine. 0:09:29.320 --> 0:09:31.600 And also, just as a side note, this is why 0:09:31.679 --> 0:09:35.960 when new love crashes like you know and and burns, 0:09:36.559 --> 0:09:40.600 um and you are with drawing from that person, withdrawing 0:09:40.640 --> 0:09:43.880 from you, you feel that sense like you're withdrawing from 0:09:43.880 --> 0:09:47.560 a drug because no longer is that source available to you. 0:09:47.800 --> 0:09:49.640 You're coming off of your fix and you're gonna need 0:09:49.679 --> 0:09:53.760 another fix. It also draws back to our previous episode 0:09:53.760 --> 0:09:55.240 that we did I Believe on the Dark Side of 0:09:55.240 --> 0:09:59.040 sarahtonin um. So, any of these chemicals, you know, even 0:09:59.080 --> 0:10:01.000 though we talk about like the love hormone and the 0:10:01.320 --> 0:10:05.000 fuel good neurotransmitter, etcetera, like these are that the brain 0:10:05.080 --> 0:10:07.440 is a complex system. In various parts of the brain, 0:10:07.520 --> 0:10:10.240 various neuro transmitters are are pulling at least a double duty. 0:10:10.520 --> 0:10:13.760 And so there even though there's there is a positive 0:10:13.800 --> 0:10:16.360 spin on any of these interactions, there's also a potential 0:10:16.360 --> 0:10:19.079 negative one. Indeed, um No, again, you just have to 0:10:19.160 --> 0:10:21.600 kind of look at it as this again, this idea 0:10:21.679 --> 0:10:24.839 of you know, split second love or love at first 0:10:24.840 --> 0:10:27.880 sight is perhaps more like there's some chemistry going on 0:10:27.880 --> 0:10:30.280 in the brain that is setting this stage for love. 0:10:31.000 --> 0:10:35.080 And Helen Fisher again, she is that biological anthropologist, and 0:10:35.120 --> 0:10:37.720 her ted talk called the brain and love. She says, 0:10:38.160 --> 0:10:41.880 there are now three academic articles in which they've looked 0:10:41.920 --> 0:10:44.839 at this attraction which may only last for a second, 0:10:44.960 --> 0:10:48.320 but it's a definite attraction in either the same brain region, 0:10:48.360 --> 0:10:50.840 this reward system or the chemicals of that reward system 0:10:50.840 --> 0:10:54.240 are involved. In fact, she says, I think animal attraction 0:10:54.280 --> 0:10:57.520 can be instant. You can see an elephant instantly go 0:10:57.720 --> 0:11:00.280 for another elephant. And I think that this is really 0:11:00.320 --> 0:11:03.040 the origin of what you and I call love at 0:11:03.080 --> 0:11:07.480 first sight. Yeah, we're talking about animal favoritism here. Um 0:11:07.720 --> 0:11:11.680 mate choice, female choice, sexual choice instantly. What comes to 0:11:11.720 --> 0:11:14.200 my mind is just like two beatles dancing around each 0:11:14.200 --> 0:11:17.280 other on a tree limb. And then ultimately you can 0:11:17.280 --> 0:11:22.240 say that any human interaction, with its levels of human complexity, 0:11:22.360 --> 0:11:25.120 is essentially the same thing. It's that little dance to 0:11:25.160 --> 0:11:27.760 see if these two pieces are gonna lock up. Yeah, 0:11:27.840 --> 0:11:30.319 in some ways it's kind of thin slicing, right, assessing 0:11:30.320 --> 0:11:33.160 the situation. All Right, we're gonna take a quick break, 0:11:33.200 --> 0:11:35.479 and when we get back, we're gonna talk about imprinting. 0:11:35.920 --> 0:11:38.280 But we're not going to talk about Twilight, the movie 0:11:38.400 --> 0:11:48.880 and imprinting. We promise. Alright, we're back. I know you 0:11:48.920 --> 0:11:50.640 just promised we weren't going to talk about Twilight. But 0:11:50.720 --> 0:11:54.600 of course you're referring to the the imprinting that occurs 0:11:54.960 --> 0:12:00.199 when a werewolf sees a half vampire baby also love 0:12:00.240 --> 0:12:02.160 with it. Just to clarify for anyone out there, it 0:12:02.240 --> 0:12:04.160 was like, I don't know what they're talking about Twilight, 0:12:04.200 --> 0:12:07.480 but and the same thing happens in humans. Well, no, 0:12:07.920 --> 0:12:10.680 it's a little bit more complicated. Um in Printing refers 0:12:10.720 --> 0:12:14.679 to a really critical period of early time in an 0:12:14.679 --> 0:12:17.800 animal life when it forms an attachment and develops a 0:12:17.880 --> 0:12:21.400 concept of its own identity. So birds and mammals are 0:12:21.400 --> 0:12:25.040 born with the pre programmed drive to imprint on their mother. 0:12:25.840 --> 0:12:29.679 And this sort of imprinting provides animals with information about, hey, 0:12:29.960 --> 0:12:33.000 this is my mom, or this person or thing or 0:12:33.040 --> 0:12:37.200 animal is really important to me, And later on this 0:12:37.280 --> 0:12:40.319 can determine who they will find attractive when they reach 0:12:40.760 --> 0:12:43.120 adulthood or who they pair up with. And there are 0:12:43.160 --> 0:12:45.520 a couple of studies that actually support this in humans 0:12:45.600 --> 0:12:48.120 and in other animals. Yeah. I mean we're ultimately talking 0:12:48.120 --> 0:12:51.840 about a predisposition to fixate on particular types of people. 0:12:52.400 --> 0:12:54.600 You know, the exact parameters are obviously going to vary 0:12:54.600 --> 0:12:56.640 a lot. It might relate to race, like you said, 0:12:56.679 --> 0:13:00.840 hair color, um, But ultimately it's kind of aiding a 0:13:00.960 --> 0:13:05.920 rough template of what you're supposed to look for. Yeah, 0:13:05.960 --> 0:13:07.960 And just so you have an idea of how easy 0:13:08.000 --> 0:13:10.960 it is to imprint in the animal world. Um. I 0:13:11.000 --> 0:13:15.520 wanted to bring up the example of Austrian naturalists Conrad Lawrenz, 0:13:16.000 --> 0:13:19.360 who became the first to sort of um codify this 0:13:19.640 --> 0:13:23.240 right and established the science behind imprinting. And he found 0:13:23.280 --> 0:13:25.880 that when baby birds emerged from their eggs, they'd imprint 0:13:25.920 --> 0:13:28.880 on whatever animated thing was in front of them. And 0:13:28.960 --> 0:13:32.880 so he tested this out. He himself became the thing 0:13:32.960 --> 0:13:37.400 that they imprinted upon, and they followed him around and um, 0:13:37.440 --> 0:13:41.200 he became the object of their affection. And then he 0:13:41.360 --> 0:13:45.199 also would put in other mother's substitutes. And he found 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:49.520 that those birds would just as easily attached to inanimate 0:13:49.600 --> 0:13:53.280 objects and oddities such as a pair of gum boots. 0:13:54.559 --> 0:13:56.360 Oh yes, this is the guy you would you see 0:13:56.400 --> 0:13:59.640 the images even treking around in the boots, Yes, a 0:13:59.679 --> 0:14:03.040 white ball and even an electric train. I Again, this 0:14:03.120 --> 0:14:06.040 is if it was presented at the right time when 0:14:06.040 --> 0:14:08.920 they were emerging and trying to figure out something to 0:14:09.000 --> 0:14:12.960 focus on into again, harness their energy into figuring out 0:14:13.559 --> 0:14:16.600 what was important, who was important, and who they were. Yeah, 0:14:16.640 --> 0:14:19.840 I mean from a biological standpoint, like life is essentially 0:14:20.160 --> 0:14:23.760 a matter of scaling this mountainous survival to fulfill your 0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:25.760 genetic mission, you have to reach the top of it, 0:14:26.040 --> 0:14:28.960 and imprinting is sort of a way of finding those 0:14:29.000 --> 0:14:33.520 first hand and footholds as you make the ascent. Yeah. 0:14:33.640 --> 0:14:38.520 Now in humans, it's, uh, it's perhaps not as clear cut, 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:40.760 but there are a couple of studies. There's a two 0:14:40.760 --> 0:14:44.280 thousand three study called sexual imprinting and Human mate choice. 0:14:44.320 --> 0:14:47.920 In this uh that the abstract actually says, quote, we 0:14:47.920 --> 0:14:51.440 report that homogammy in humans is attained partly bi sexual 0:14:51.560 --> 0:14:56.320 imprinting on the opposite sex part parent during childhood. We 0:14:56.440 --> 0:15:00.880 hypothesize that children's fashion a mental model of their opposite 0:15:00.920 --> 0:15:05.000 sex parents phenotype that is used as a template for 0:15:05.080 --> 0:15:10.120 acquiring mates to phenotype meaning like the physical characteristics, and 0:15:10.160 --> 0:15:12.560 that it goes on in this abstract to say, to 0:15:12.680 --> 0:15:16.920 disentangle the effects of phenotypic matching and sexual imprinting, adopted 0:15:17.000 --> 0:15:21.440 daughters in their rearing families were examined. Judges found significant 0:15:21.480 --> 0:15:28.160 resemblance on facial traits between daughters husbands and their adopted fathers. Furthermore, 0:15:28.200 --> 0:15:30.640 this effect may be modified by the quality of the 0:15:30.720 --> 0:15:36.000 father daughter relationship during childhood. Daughters who received more emotional 0:15:36.000 --> 0:15:38.800 support from their adoptive father were more likely to choose 0:15:38.880 --> 0:15:41.560 mates similar to the father than those whose father provided 0:15:41.600 --> 0:15:46.800 a less positive emotional atmosphere. And this, to me feels 0:15:46.800 --> 0:15:49.360 like one of those adoy moments because you see this 0:15:49.400 --> 0:15:53.480 alive classic Oh I married my mother, I married my father, 0:15:54.120 --> 0:15:57.840 and also just the myth of the of Oedipus marrying 0:15:57.840 --> 0:16:01.240 your mother murdering your father. It's it's kind of funny 0:16:01.240 --> 0:16:03.880 because as we'll look at the next section here on 0:16:04.000 --> 0:16:09.600 gene um compatibility or genetic compatibility, it's a fine line here. 0:16:09.680 --> 0:16:12.480 You want someone who's similar enough and the traits that 0:16:12.560 --> 0:16:17.000 you admire and a parent, because hey, your parent was 0:16:17.200 --> 0:16:19.800 attracted to that parent and had successful offspring, the same 0:16:19.840 --> 0:16:22.440 thing could happen for you, right, But you want enough 0:16:22.560 --> 0:16:27.800 genetic diversity to strengthen any offspring that you might have. Yes, 0:16:28.800 --> 0:16:31.000 And if I can just return to the Top Gun analogy, 0:16:31.080 --> 0:16:33.880 it's it's identifying the any plane, there's a certain type 0:16:33.880 --> 0:16:37.320 of plane you need to shoot down. Yeah, poor Goose. 0:16:38.880 --> 0:16:41.360 I have theories about Goose. I really wanted to see 0:16:41.360 --> 0:16:43.520 a sequel to Top Gun where Goose lived and was 0:16:43.560 --> 0:16:48.360 reprogrammed by the Soviets the Battle matter that that would 0:16:48.360 --> 0:16:50.520 have been a movie that I really could have wanted 0:16:50.560 --> 0:16:54.000 to have seen. Uh oh, well, you never know. Maybe 0:16:54.000 --> 0:16:57.240 there'll be some sort of reboot, maybe maybe by Robert 0:16:57.240 --> 0:17:02.840 liam Alright, But in terms of genetic compatibility, again, we 0:17:02.880 --> 0:17:05.439 can look at the animal world. There's a study from 0:17:05.480 --> 0:17:08.240 April two thou and nine, the issue of the journal Genetic, 0:17:08.720 --> 0:17:12.639 in which researchers from Cornell University found that female fruit 0:17:12.640 --> 0:17:16.240 flies are biologically primed to sense which males are more 0:17:16.320 --> 0:17:21.200 genetically compatible with them and to make more eggs after 0:17:21.280 --> 0:17:24.600 mating with good matches than they do with less compatible matches. 0:17:25.160 --> 0:17:28.040 And so these findings suggest that the females can somehow 0:17:28.200 --> 0:17:32.680 judge a potential mate upon their first meeting and then 0:17:32.760 --> 0:17:39.040 biologically react to boost the chances of producing against successful offsprings. So, 0:17:39.400 --> 0:17:41.560 and we bring this up because we want to kind 0:17:41.560 --> 0:17:43.560 of say that whole love at first sight thing isn't 0:17:43.600 --> 0:17:47.400 just okay, you locked eyes and um, this person kind 0:17:47.400 --> 0:17:50.200 of has these traits that you admire. There's other stuff 0:17:50.240 --> 0:17:52.200 going on to Yeah, there's a lot of stuff going 0:17:52.240 --> 0:17:56.760 on underneath the surface. Um. And with the fruit fly situation, 0:17:56.800 --> 0:17:59.720 like a lot of that is also related to avoiding 0:18:00.119 --> 0:18:04.159 hooking up with a close relative, which obviously is genetically speaking, 0:18:04.640 --> 0:18:08.000 not a wise move for for any organism. Uh. But 0:18:08.119 --> 0:18:12.560 then the human crossover for this is is pretty spectacular. 0:18:13.240 --> 0:18:15.080 Now with the fruit flies, I mean a lot of 0:18:15.080 --> 0:18:18.920 this is as simple as programming to keep one fruit 0:18:18.920 --> 0:18:22.239 fly from mating with a close relative and you know, 0:18:22.280 --> 0:18:25.560 and stirring up the genetic ramifications of that. But then 0:18:25.600 --> 0:18:27.720 when we when we look at how this plays out 0:18:27.760 --> 0:18:30.639 in the human sphere, we see, uh, we see a 0:18:30.680 --> 0:18:35.000 lot more complexity. Um, depending how complex you want to 0:18:35.000 --> 0:18:39.119 to to make sniffing one another person's sweat or you know, 0:18:39.240 --> 0:18:41.680 engaging in a makeout session with them. Yeah, again, that's 0:18:41.680 --> 0:18:44.879 just it's complex biochemistry and the fruit flies are exhibiting 0:18:44.920 --> 0:18:47.440 the us and humans we have seen in studies exhibit 0:18:47.480 --> 0:18:50.879 this when they sniff the sweaty armpits of T shirts 0:18:50.880 --> 0:18:54.680 worn by the opposite sex. Again, this is like sort 0:18:54.720 --> 0:18:58.760 of gender normed studies that we're talking about here. But 0:18:58.800 --> 0:19:03.159 the idea is that women were more uh more likely 0:19:03.240 --> 0:19:06.560 to select a mate with someone who had a far 0:19:06.760 --> 0:19:10.719 different genetic expression than their own, because again, you need 0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:13.919 genetic diversity that's going to uh, that's going to result 0:19:13.960 --> 0:19:16.000 in stronger offspring, and that again as part of the 0:19:16.040 --> 0:19:19.639 whole genetic mission of of any organism. Um. So, so 0:19:19.920 --> 0:19:23.840 we begin to have this picture emerging of it's it's 0:19:23.880 --> 0:19:27.040 like multiple scans are going on, you know, kind of 0:19:27.160 --> 0:19:30.040 rowbody computer re star trek scans almost if you want 0:19:30.040 --> 0:19:32.280 to use that analogy, and and then you almost have 0:19:32.320 --> 0:19:36.199 different departments that are reporting back on how things are 0:19:36.240 --> 0:19:38.600 matching up, like all right, does she look like our mother? Yep, 0:19:38.640 --> 0:19:40.359 it looks like our mother. Right, we're gonna go on that. 0:19:40.600 --> 0:19:42.760 And then you have the other the other department, and 0:19:42.760 --> 0:19:44.879 they're like, all right, well, we're making some sense of 0:19:44.920 --> 0:19:48.280 the genetic combatibility here. Um, we're taking in the smells, 0:19:48.920 --> 0:19:51.080 we may have to take in some of the saliva 0:19:51.119 --> 0:19:53.159 as well. And we're gonna see what the test results 0:19:53.200 --> 0:19:55.800 there are. So so they're they're they're kind of these 0:19:55.840 --> 0:19:59.400 different it's almost like trying to get legislation passed or something. Yeah, 0:19:59.440 --> 0:20:01.640 you're right in if you think about it that way, 0:20:01.680 --> 0:20:05.520 that locking eyes across the room. Alright, dopamine all right, now, 0:20:05.720 --> 0:20:09.120 go inch forward and meet the person to get more dopamine. Now, 0:20:09.320 --> 0:20:12.119 further assess and then yes, at the end of the night, 0:20:12.160 --> 0:20:14.400 there might be the swapping of the spit to further 0:20:14.520 --> 0:20:17.680 assess whether or not you're compatible. And in our mind 0:20:17.720 --> 0:20:20.639 it's all playing out like like like like a French 0:20:20.760 --> 0:20:23.760 romance movie, but but under the surface, it's it's a 0:20:23.760 --> 0:20:27.800 lot more complex, weating outgoing. Yeah, and there's another element 0:20:27.880 --> 0:20:31.119 here that is pushing the needle a bit when we 0:20:31.200 --> 0:20:33.520 talk about this love at first sight, and it's called 0:20:33.600 --> 0:20:37.320 a sort of mating. And we already know that people 0:20:37.359 --> 0:20:41.159 tend to gravitate towards each other based on their shared 0:20:41.440 --> 0:20:45.000 socio economic and education backgrounds. Right, So if you ever 0:20:45.040 --> 0:20:51.040 heard the phrase, uh, birds of a feather fly together, Yes, Yeah, 0:20:51.119 --> 0:20:53.720 it's sort of like this, like you're seeking out someone 0:20:53.760 --> 0:20:55.800 who is like you, and we know that we're doing 0:20:55.840 --> 0:20:58.199 this even when we're not trying to go after some 0:20:58.240 --> 0:21:00.760 sort of relationship, we just tend to do, you know, 0:21:01.520 --> 0:21:05.240 with each other. When when we're connecting with one another. Yeah, 0:21:05.280 --> 0:21:07.760 I mean people you can have conversations with about the 0:21:07.760 --> 0:21:10.440 things that matter to you. Do you end up engaging 0:21:10.440 --> 0:21:12.440 with people that are kind of from the same background 0:21:12.840 --> 0:21:15.600 or have similar interests. Well, it turns out that there 0:21:15.680 --> 0:21:19.040 may even be a body fat component to a sort 0:21:19.040 --> 0:21:21.919 of mating. There's a two thousand and seven study in 0:21:22.000 --> 0:21:26.800 which the researchers, who are based at Rout Research Institute 0:21:26.880 --> 0:21:30.159 in the University of Aberdeen, measured the body composition of 0:21:30.240 --> 0:21:34.280 forty two couples using a sophisticated technique called dual energy 0:21:34.520 --> 0:21:38.960 X ray absorbed geometry, and the results show that the 0:21:39.000 --> 0:21:43.120 amount of body fat in one person was proportionately very 0:21:43.200 --> 0:21:46.560 similar to that of their partners. And so there's this 0:21:46.640 --> 0:21:49.399 idea that not only do we try to find similarities 0:21:49.560 --> 0:21:53.679 and our you know, socio economic backgrounds and what our 0:21:53.720 --> 0:21:57.000 taste and music are, but maybe even the shapes of 0:21:57.000 --> 0:22:00.679 our bodies. Yeah. Now that the study point out that 0:22:00.720 --> 0:22:04.359 it's it's unclear though, exactly how these associations come about. 0:22:04.880 --> 0:22:08.199 I mean, do the social activities of of overweight and 0:22:08.240 --> 0:22:11.080 obese people just merely conside to the you know that 0:22:11.160 --> 0:22:15.080 the social activities of active runners, they just happened to concide. 0:22:15.080 --> 0:22:17.960 You met this person while you were engaging in similar 0:22:18.320 --> 0:22:21.160 activities that have an impact on your physical fitness or 0:22:21.320 --> 0:22:23.480 you know, or vice versa. So we're just more likely 0:22:23.520 --> 0:22:27.880 to meet people that have a similar body index. Yeah, 0:22:27.880 --> 0:22:29.960 and I kind of feel like across the board, obviously 0:22:30.119 --> 0:22:32.480 you don't see this. I mean, you see plenty of 0:22:32.560 --> 0:22:36.480 examples of couples who don't match up in terms of 0:22:36.520 --> 0:22:39.240 body type or body fat. Yeah, I mean I think 0:22:39.240 --> 0:22:42.479 it was Paula Abduel that that pointed out that opposites attract, right, 0:22:42.520 --> 0:22:46.920 that was the big track. Yes, it was Paula Abduel. 0:22:46.960 --> 0:22:50.480 But as we've discussed before, opposite they do attract. But 0:22:50.640 --> 0:22:53.000 can you still have to have enough there in common 0:22:53.480 --> 0:22:55.720 in order to make that whole dynamic work. So again, 0:22:55.720 --> 0:22:58.040 it kind of comes back to this idea of multiple 0:22:58.400 --> 0:23:01.840