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Speaker 1: code and let's get on with the show. Hi, Hi,
Speaker 1: I can do it sometimes, Horrible Decisions. My name is
Speaker 1: Wheezy and it's your girl Mandy. A K A bit.
Speaker 1: That's all I'm gonna for now, because y'all, motherfucker's we're
Speaker 1: actually gonna talk about it for the kick of the week.
Speaker 1: I'm so sick of Like even when I posted the
Speaker 1: guy that everyone apparently just keeps bringing up, everyone is
Speaker 1: assuming that now every guy I deal with I PEG
Speaker 1: and I'm like, what, but that's not the case. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's on your own fault. But I mean I like
Speaker 1: to do it. I'm into it. So for the kick
Speaker 1: of the week is going to be very interesting how
Speaker 1: we're gonna talk about that. I want to see a
Speaker 1: little preface. Um, I'm sure you know from the title
Speaker 1: what we're gonna talk about in this episode. And I
Speaker 1: want to apologize for the previous episode we had. We
Speaker 1: brought someone on that had HIV, and honestly, I think that, Um,
Speaker 1: I can only speak for myself. Sometimes I don't really
Speaker 1: consider the reach of our podcast and like how wrong
Speaker 1: Google can be and I know how dumb that is. Now,
Speaker 1: So the two ladies that are sitting in front of us,
Speaker 1: um are you know, came with a bunch of papers,
Speaker 1: and it makes me feel like I think we expected
Speaker 1: him to have a lot of answers, which and that
Speaker 1: was the thing too, so for him, he was born
Speaker 1: with i V. So I feel like that it also
Speaker 1: delved into kind of a different experience from someone who
Speaker 1: may have lived I don't want to say a normal life,
Speaker 1: but maybe a life without the disease. And then and
Speaker 1: then became infected infective, so like he just knew how
Speaker 1: to I guess take care of it. Right He's like okay,
Speaker 1: and he's like my mama had Like you know, it
Speaker 1: was it was definitely that it's normalized because you know,
Speaker 1: it is something that is normal. You know, like you
Speaker 1: if you are infective with HIV, you can live a
Speaker 1: normal life. Um. But like you know, him not knowing
Speaker 1: the more clinical sides of things right well, And I
Speaker 1: think that was even my interest in interviewing him because
Speaker 1: I didn't with a sex positive podcast, Like I didn't
Speaker 1: want to, you know, maybe have so much of an
Speaker 1: episode where it's like, yeah, if you have sex, you're
Speaker 1: gonna catch HIV and die and then AIDS and whatever
Speaker 1: like so I didn't even want to have that kind
Speaker 1: of relationship. So anyways, we're sitting here talking guys. We
Speaker 1: are joined today with two special guests. Um, we have
Speaker 1: Janelle and Olmo tail boom almost Tyle. We have almost
Speaker 1: like bitch, I got this. Um we're gonna call her omo,
Speaker 1: but we got Amo Janelle Ohm are you Homo? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I mean Omo, are you Homo? Because she was talking
Speaker 1: about a girl was queer that would be Twitter name
Speaker 1: that you can find me on Twitter. Pres momobile. Yeah
Speaker 1: gotta we gotta your name girl, um and so, I
Speaker 1: guess go ahead and introduce yourselves to our audience. I'm
Speaker 1: Janelle A k A. I'm going half of the Nigeria Nightmares.
Speaker 1: We call each other. That's what everyone That's what everyone
Speaker 1: knows each other as well. That's what everyone knows us
Speaker 1: at um as at work. Okay, where you got? Were
Speaker 1: you born in Nigeria? No, I'm an half again, she's
Speaker 1: she's full of mettri you Africa. Yeah, I love that
Speaker 1: now that I spent in that too. But I everywhere Now,
Speaker 1: I'm like just said, you know, I've never been there,
Speaker 1: but I am okay, you're I've been there. It was
Speaker 1: interesting I heard that, yes, um so I say, um
Speaker 1: like parting on Victoria Island the Lucky Chevy um and Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was an interesting experience. None, I'll say the least.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm hoping that maybe over the years they
Speaker 1: do maybe allow more people to experience it. Basically, it's
Speaker 1: one of those countries where you do have to be invited.
Speaker 1: So because I traveled so much, I wanted some sort
Speaker 1: of tourist fill or maybe to see if we can go, like,
Speaker 1: let's do a tour, bitch. No they like everyone says
Speaker 1: go to Ghana first, to go to South Africa. Then yeah,
Speaker 1: so I did. I did. So you have to go
Speaker 1: if you like, know someone that has family, Like I
Speaker 1: really want to go with my friends and have like
Speaker 1: a crazy legas like turn up experience. Um, but I'm
Speaker 1: only gonna be able to do that because you know,
Speaker 1: I have a family, because you have a family that
Speaker 1: lived there. So yeah, so I'm excited. Um, what do
Speaker 1: you guys do? I guess go ahead and let our
Speaker 1: let our audience know what you guys doing while y'all
Speaker 1: are you okay? So, um, we're both we both work
Speaker 1: for the Ryan Health Network. UM. I work at the
Speaker 1: Lower east Side location and yeah, yes we're on UM
Speaker 1: it's an alphabet city. Were on East Third in between
Speaker 1: Avenue C and D and UM. Our titles like we're
Speaker 1: sexual health educators. So we do HIV testing in like
Speaker 1: at the center and also in the community. Like there's
Speaker 1: a huge mobile van that I have to drive in
Speaker 1: the summer, like we can test all ye and the
Speaker 1: so the ones that are just like parked on the
Speaker 1: streets and you walk in and get sold. Yeah, we'll
Speaker 1: go to west Forth or Um. We're eld s Tompkins
Speaker 1: Square Park. Have you ever been tested in the I have.
Speaker 1: They used to also bring them to our school. But
Speaker 1: I'm from Florida, but not testing really No, they've done well.
Speaker 1: I mean I say band goes to like Queen's College.
Speaker 1: Yeah they yeah, I know the yeah so also as well. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I did it at a music festival once, like so
Speaker 1: funny story. When I did it, the friends that I
Speaker 1: were with like, bitch, if you have it, it's you,
Speaker 1: we gonna stay here, right. We tried to get us
Speaker 1: to go to afrop so we could already be in
Speaker 1: Africa trying to make a word. Right. Let me see
Speaker 1: when I did it? Right. So I'm waiting for the
Speaker 1: results like ten minutes and the guy next to me
Speaker 1: keeps talking like, yeah, so you're from Florida. That's great
Speaker 1: like where I'm like sure, I mean yeah, like that
Speaker 1: twenty minutes is like it could be really right. It's scary.
Speaker 1: Is like you literally sit there and think of all
Speaker 1: types of like people that everyone's always asking how do
Speaker 1: you read the test and to see and there their
Speaker 1: lines and I'm like I'm not telling you how to
Speaker 1: read the test because I don't want you to like
Speaker 1: freak out it's bad. And then when I got off
Speaker 1: the bus and was confirmed and I have HIV, I
Speaker 1: carried that paper around and was like, fucking rap, right,
Speaker 1: what's up? You got yours? Right? I was people taking
Speaker 1: pictures of their results after like sending him to social media.
Speaker 1: That's what instagram on Instagram. I'm cleared. I mean yeah,
Speaker 1: because we give letters, because it's like, yeah, your partner
Speaker 1: for receipts, because anyone could just say, like, oh, I
Speaker 1: want to talk about UM, I want to make sure
Speaker 1: you remind me for later, like the conversation when you
Speaker 1: do have it in a you're in a mobile band.
Speaker 1: You gotta wait girls. I like that question. So we're
Speaker 1: gonna go ahead and start off kind of like how
Speaker 1: we did our episode UM with the individual who did
Speaker 1: have HIV, and this was, oh my god, what episode
Speaker 1: twenty six it was. It was a while back. It
Speaker 1: was in the in the short beginning of Horrible Decisions.
Speaker 1: So I wanted to maybe start off this would be
Speaker 1: our icebreaker for this episode. I wanted to kind of
Speaker 1: debunk some of the myths associated with HIV, and one
Speaker 1: that I find to be probably the most interesting, which
Speaker 1: is why I always think I could catch it. I
Speaker 1: used to think, damn, I swallow come ye, so I
Speaker 1: had swallow it. No, and then apparently you can't catch it.
Speaker 1: So what he said, what he said was correct that like, um,
Speaker 1: that your stomach acids and the enzymes in there do
Speaker 1: like get rid of the virus, so it's hard to
Speaker 1: you're not gonna get it once it's in your digestive system.
Speaker 1: But it is true that like if you have a
Speaker 1: cut in your mouth and you swallow, seeming there is
Speaker 1: a possible chance that you can't, but like you said
Speaker 1: on the show, like it's like really rare, like one
Speaker 1: in one in ten thou So I mean there's a
Speaker 1: there's a chance, but it's not like super likely, Okay,
Speaker 1: So that's that's good to know. It's not considered high risk.
Speaker 1: And I hate um talking about different types of sex
Speaker 1: in terms of risk because I think that that kind
Speaker 1: of adds a stigma to certain types of sex. You know,
Speaker 1: like you know a lot of people it's easy to
Speaker 1: get HIV through anal sex, so there's anal tears. So
Speaker 1: that's why I appreciate it with gay and associate a
Speaker 1: lot of us women. I mean, we the only like
Speaker 1: the tip, but it's so anal sex. It's nothing like
Speaker 1: I would love more dick. I just can't even with
Speaker 1: a lot of loop dude. I'm like, it's a different
Speaker 1: way around with a tail out your ask, don't you.
Speaker 1: But they're tell those like there's a horse when they're slimmer,
Speaker 1: I can take it with the girth of like a
Speaker 1: real dick. I can't. I could do the plugs. I
Speaker 1: could do the little things, maybe a smaller dick naked,
Speaker 1: but like a skinny pencil dick. Maybe not a pencil
Speaker 1: dick pencil. They look like a vibrator, they really do.
Speaker 1: Oh you don't do those little ones? Yeah, like the
Speaker 1: ones that started like a triangle. And I can't. I
Speaker 1: can't believe you bought Angela but plugs for her birthday.
Speaker 1: Why would I? That's brand I mean cutter a vibrator. Yeah, oh,
Speaker 1: I guess I'm from Horrible Decisions. You have a podcast
Speaker 1: called lip service. I can't get you butt plug. I
Speaker 1: bought her the four gift card. Well that was classy.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, A don't ask what wear makeup? Some
Speaker 1: of those beauty blenders look like plugs. They do a
Speaker 1: lot of the duty blunders look like they fucking do.
Speaker 1: I love the shape of the beauty blender and every
Speaker 1: time I look at it, because I have a lot
Speaker 1: of cute ones, my friend sends them to me and
Speaker 1: I'm like, cute plugs. I can't and do you want
Speaker 1: to ugly but plug? I don't be butt plugging unless
Speaker 1: it's with a dick. Well, then they don't plug my dick.
Speaker 1: Shut up. So another one of the myths that I
Speaker 1: wanted to talk about, especially coming from Florida and us
Speaker 1: having a whole bunch of goddamn bugs. Um I did
Speaker 1: at one point used to think that if a mosquito
Speaker 1: bit someone with HIV and then came and bait me
Speaker 1: not shortly long after, that maybe there could be some
Speaker 1: sort of transmission of the virus that way. That is
Speaker 1: also a myth. Correct, that's a myth. That's not true
Speaker 1: because HIV needs to it's a whole cell to live
Speaker 1: in to survive, so like it can only survive in
Speaker 1: c D four s. House are like the human cell.
Speaker 1: So like, you know, even if a mosquito bites you,
Speaker 1: even if if they get the animals can't contract they
Speaker 1: can't get HIV, so, like there are different types of
Speaker 1: immuno deficiency viruses that other animals can get, Like there's
Speaker 1: s I V f I V, which is feline cats,
Speaker 1: Like you know animalst can get s T I S.
Speaker 1: I don't know why, like last week I decided to
Speaker 1: google that. But wait, wait, there's sexually transmitted diseases for animals,
Speaker 1: which brought that up on the evolution episodes we've been
Speaker 1: talking about. I don't know what I would say. I
Speaker 1: want to ask both of you what is one of
Speaker 1: the myths that you hear the most often and what
Speaker 1: is the answer to it? Like, what is what is
Speaker 1: one of the things that you hear the most regarding HIV? UM?
Speaker 1: Right off the top, UM, there's a shelter across the
Speaker 1: street from our health center, women shelter and UM, so
Speaker 1: obviously it's a lot of women living in in a
Speaker 1: general space. And then a lot of them are worried that, Um,
Speaker 1: if someone has period blood on the toilet and they
Speaker 1: sit on it, are they going to get HIV? I
Speaker 1: don't know, Like I've heard a lot, Okay, but that's false,
Speaker 1: Like you're not going to be able to contract from
Speaker 1: that way? Because also by that point it's it's airborne,
Speaker 1: so it's hit the air and like it's like getting pregnant, right,
Speaker 1: what do you mean? They're basically saying, like you can,
Speaker 1: because in order for to survive, it needs to be
Speaker 1: inside of a south which is the same like when
Speaker 1: girls like the turkey based thing is a is a myth, right,
Speaker 1: like you can turkey base, But I'm saying turkey basing
Speaker 1: is a total fucking thing that people do once they
Speaker 1: collect the sperm, right, and you can do it with
Speaker 1: your partner if you're lesbian or whatever. What I'm talking
Speaker 1: about is men thinking like you throw your fucking condom
Speaker 1: in the trash can, and like a girl's gonna like
Speaker 1: save it and try to pregnant later. So that's what
Speaker 1: I was referring to, was theaing out of the condom.
Speaker 1: I mean, if it's already terribly if you get the
Speaker 1: condom as soon as then put it into the trash
Speaker 1: and you freeze that. So so say, I guess that's
Speaker 1: where I would have that same question with HIV. Is
Speaker 1: there a time frame? If you're telling me there's a
Speaker 1: time frame with sperm and I'm thinking it's the same
Speaker 1: airborne rules. Is there a time frame where technically you
Speaker 1: could by the period wood if you said on the
Speaker 1: seat and you had to open sort like, I know,
Speaker 1: there's a whole lot that goes into it. It can
Speaker 1: just touch you on your skin and then now you right,
Speaker 1: you need to have an open on your butt or whatever,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Like, there's just so many
Speaker 1: factors that's just not something that I would be concerned about. Okay.
Speaker 1: And then what's one of the myths that you hear
Speaker 1: the most? I mean, I think I don't think I
Speaker 1: hear like a lot of myths about HIV itself. Besides
Speaker 1: you know the regulars like oh you can get it
Speaker 1: from kissing or saliva or whatever, which is false. You
Speaker 1: can't get it that way. But I think one of
Speaker 1: the biggestness that I encounter when I test people is
Speaker 1: at you know, I always ask, oh, like, um, do
Speaker 1: you want to get an HIV test today? And a
Speaker 1: woman you know, in her fifties will be like, oh, no, baby,
Speaker 1: I don't need one of those. And I'm like, why
Speaker 1: do you think that you need one? And she's like, oh, well,
Speaker 1: you know, I've been married for such and such so
Speaker 1: many years and It's like the number of patients that
Speaker 1: I have who are women who have gotten infected by
Speaker 1: their partners who you know didn't know that they've been
Speaker 1: infected for years because you know, they never thought to
Speaker 1: get tested. It's like, you know, you you don't know,
Speaker 1: and every's everyone's responsibility to be getting tested regularly at
Speaker 1: least once a year for being tested. So, um, if
Speaker 1: you're in a monogamous relationship, try like you need to
Speaker 1: at least go once and truly monogamous because you know,
Speaker 1: sometimes you're where we go one way monogamous but you
Speaker 1: don't know what your partner is doing. But ideally, just um,
Speaker 1: like definitely go once a year and then if you
Speaker 1: can go twice a year, and then if you have
Speaker 1: multiple partners, try to go every three months and years
Speaker 1: with out like getting tested and not knowing you have it.
Speaker 1: Like I guess where I'm kind of confused is like
Speaker 1: you know, we assume the second you get it and
Speaker 1: you find out you have it, you've got to jump
Speaker 1: on this and take care of it. I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: how could it be years? Like how does it live
Speaker 1: in your body? What kind of effects doesn't have while
Speaker 1: you're not getting treated for years so I mean, okay,
Speaker 1: So in the first two weeks, so like the first
Speaker 1: ten to fourteen days after you've been infected with HIV,
Speaker 1: so the virus enters your body, a lot of people
Speaker 1: experience symptoms of what's known as acute HIV. So that's
Speaker 1: the time when the acute try. Right, So the HIV
Speaker 1: virus is multiplying, dividing in your body, um, and you're
Speaker 1: starting to have a lot of like immunological symptoms, so
Speaker 1: like you know, you might have inflammation, and a lot
Speaker 1: of people describe these symptoms as like flu, Like so
Speaker 1: you know you're gonna you know the symptoms of the flu.
Speaker 1: You don't and we in one a time A bitch
Speaker 1: got signed every time. My goddamn. But this is why
Speaker 1: it's actually a really good reason to bring it up now,
Speaker 1: because like because right it is the wintertime, a lot
Speaker 1: of people are getting the flute and they might have
Speaker 1: these symptoms and think, oh, well, it's nothing, but it's
Speaker 1: like if you have these symptoms and ten to fourteen
Speaker 1: days ago you had unprotected sex with someone whose status
Speaker 1: you don't know it, and we're not gonna go get
Speaker 1: We're not trying to scare anyone, So I need to gain. Sorry,
Speaker 1: so this is um, I guess this is gonna go
Speaker 1: ahead and segue us into ar Vanilla ship. If you're
Speaker 1: listening UM to this episode. One of the reasons why
Speaker 1: I definitely chose to do this hit up Janelle even
Speaker 1: though Janelle but hanns eight t y'all and she saw
Speaker 1: me and do say pelluts. It was like, Hi, ma
Speaker 1: up email and I knew that may you I'm drunk.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, well, I know she didn't think I
Speaker 1: was going I'll say girl, yeah, d n me girl,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna bring you all. Yeah. You know some people
Speaker 1: crazy no, yeah, but she because y'all came at least
Speaker 1: with a nice email. Your email is very professional. And
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, yeah, well you be like, yo,
Speaker 1: I got songs about sex. You're gonna have me on
Speaker 1: to their own ship and be like hello Cloud Like hey,
Speaker 1: I didn't know, No, we're not. That's my response. Sorry.
Speaker 1: Um so yeah, so Joannelle saw me at say Flues
Speaker 1: and I was like, girl, We're gonna bring you on.
Speaker 1: But one of the reasons why I definitely wanted to
Speaker 1: have this UM I guess conversation. As you guys know,
Speaker 1: I probably spent the last month, UM every weekend in Atlanta,
Speaker 1: UM for and I also used to live there, and
Speaker 1: so there is now the CDC has went ahead and
Speaker 1: put that Atlanta is now in an HIV epidemic. Um
Speaker 1: as far as they are now actually comparing Atlanta to
Speaker 1: third world countries, I didn't want to go ahead and
Speaker 1: say I put here it says that downtown Atlanta is
Speaker 1: as bad as Zimbabwe or Harrera or Durban, said Dr
Speaker 1: Carlos del Rio Court, director of Emery University Center for
Speaker 1: AIDS Research. Another thing that I also saw was a
Speaker 1: recent study released by the CDC shows that wife shows
Speaker 1: why funding is still critical. If you live in the southeast,
Speaker 1: you're more likely to be diagnosed with HIV than any
Speaker 1: other part of the country, and in Georgia the risk
Speaker 1: of diagnosis leaps to one in fifty one UM. And
Speaker 1: so I definitely wanted to bring this to the forefront
Speaker 1: because Atlanta is a city I hold so dear in
Speaker 1: my heart and I do be fucking when I be
Speaker 1: in town. So I guess I'll stay home. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: so we we We do have again our live show
Speaker 1: on February in Atlanta. But it's crazy to me make
Speaker 1: out and you can have sex with a condom on yeah,
Speaker 1: which I ain't worried about it. I ain't really work
Speaker 1: third world country in Atlanta. Yeah, that's that's that's a lot.
Speaker 1: So I kind of wanted to to bring this to
Speaker 1: you guys. You guys do a lot out of um.
Speaker 1: Y'all have paperwork. God damn. So stats are on. So
Speaker 1: can we go ahead and maybe delve into the epidemic
Speaker 1: that's happening in Atlanta, specifically in the African American community.
Speaker 1: And I do want to also focus that this is
Speaker 1: not only men ladies. This has it's it's not gender specific.
Speaker 1: This is for men and women. Of course, men um
Speaker 1: do hold a higher risk because like we mentioned earlier
Speaker 1: with the anal sex um. But like I do want
Speaker 1: to share with you guys. Unfortunately, and and I hate
Speaker 1: to discuss it, but there is a large download community
Speaker 1: in Atlanta, which is why women now face these same
Speaker 1: risks because the men that you are dealing with may
Speaker 1: or may not be open to letting you know that
Speaker 1: they have partners that are of the same sex. So
Speaker 1: if you guys, can I mean, if we say that,
Speaker 1: then that's just kind of saying like all the gays
Speaker 1: are having it in Atlanta. I know that, but that's
Speaker 1: not definitely stick mu right, because that's why I said it.
Speaker 1: I just feel like it's always so victim blame me
Speaker 1: by like you know what I mean. I just I
Speaker 1: think that That's why I worded it the way I did.
Speaker 1: I thought I did a fine job with Unfortunately, we
Speaker 1: do have men that are open to letting us know
Speaker 1: that they deal with other men, because unfortunately we shame
Speaker 1: them for it. But like I was telling um Olmo
Speaker 1: in the in the lobby, prep was something that I
Speaker 1: was considering at one point because I do deal with
Speaker 1: men who have openly admitted that they have experimented or
Speaker 1: dealt with other men. And so to me, it's not
Speaker 1: victim blame me at all, but me and and those
Speaker 1: men have had those type of conversations as well. So
Speaker 1: if we can delve into maybe some of the stats
Speaker 1: in Atlanta that you know, or what's going on in
Speaker 1: Atlanta as to why this epidemic is happening, I mean,
Speaker 1: so like as you said, like it's disproportionately affecting communities
Speaker 1: of color. Um, so you know, black and brown people's
Speaker 1: but you know, in Atlanta specifically, it's obviously more African
Speaker 1: American UM. And you know when you think when you
Speaker 1: think about the age to be epidemic and how it
Speaker 1: works in the country, you know, it impacts people based
Speaker 1: on race and socio economic status because then you can't
Speaker 1: have access to healthcare. UM. But then things like you mentioned,
Speaker 1: like homophobia and like stigma also are associated with that
Speaker 1: because people you know, who might be gay or queer
Speaker 1: questioning like might be like, oh, well, I shouldn't get tested.
Speaker 1: You know, there's so much fear about getting tested in general. UM.
Speaker 1: And then you know when speaking about like the types
Speaker 1: of sex that UM have carry a greater risk that
Speaker 1: I say in quotation marks um. Uh. You know, there's
Speaker 1: so much stigma associated with anal sex UM because of
Speaker 1: the fact that the risk of you know, spreading HIV
Speaker 1: is higher UM. But in general, like, yeah, obviously there
Speaker 1: is a huge epidemic in Atlanta, but that epidemic mirrors
Speaker 1: so many other parts in the world, UM, and so
Speaker 1: many parts in this country where people don't have access
Speaker 1: to healthcare. So you know, there was a huge epidemic
Speaker 1: in d C as well, UM. And you know in
Speaker 1: New York there there is an HIV epidemic here. You know,
Speaker 1: the rate of new infections were rising UM and now
Speaker 1: they're going down because of so many interventions. And that's
Speaker 1: part of like GEL and I do, because New York
Speaker 1: City has a three point plan to end the epidemic
Speaker 1: in UM. So the three parts are the first one
Speaker 1: is to get tested because obviously you need to know
Speaker 1: your status. If you're positive, then you can be linked
Speaker 1: to services so that you're not spreading it to other people,
Speaker 1: and you're taking anti retroviral medications so that you eventually
Speaker 1: get down to an undetectable level and undetectable UM referring
Speaker 1: to your viral load. So once you're in there's also
Speaker 1: something now on the CDC, I believe in seventeen but
Speaker 1: UM they came up with you equals you, which means
Speaker 1: undetectable viral load equals untransmittable. So you want UM you're
Speaker 1: likelihood of passing it onto somebody else. It's right, which
Speaker 1: is why it's really important for people when they do
Speaker 1: find out that they have HIV two immediate get linked
Speaker 1: to care to start taking their intiretroviral medications because when
Speaker 1: they're taking medication, they're keeping themselves healthy. UM, and if
Speaker 1: you have an undetectable viral, then you can't pass it
Speaker 1: on to other people. That's why it's even for people
Speaker 1: that are undetectable. Yeah, it's like once you're if you're
Speaker 1: HIV positive, you're always going to be on medication. And
Speaker 1: then the third part of the three point plan is PREP,
Speaker 1: so all the people who are HIV negative take PREP.
Speaker 1: Or if you're in a relationship with someone who's positive,
Speaker 1: which is called scientific term is serial discordant, but you
Speaker 1: can just say magnetic couple like one positive. So if
Speaker 1: you guys are in a magnetic couple, UM, then the
Speaker 1: person who's negative should be on PREP so that they're
Speaker 1: not going to contracted from their partner, and the person
Speaker 1: who is positive, they're hopefully they're taking their medications in there.
Speaker 1: And again that was something that we weren't able to
Speaker 1: really touch on much in our previous HIV episode because
Speaker 1: he was born with the virus, so PREP would not
Speaker 1: have helped him UM. And so I do want to
Speaker 1: delve into that into the horrible decision, especially considering UM.
Speaker 1: I've read articles where they're trying to issue it in
Speaker 1: the a u C in Atlanta. So the CDC actually suggested, um,
Speaker 1: the Atlanta University more Clark UM. And so basically they're
Speaker 1: suggesting the CDC is suggesting that the youth start just
Speaker 1: taking prep like we take vitamins basically. UM in So
Speaker 1: like sorry, I kind of like skipped around Atlanta and
Speaker 1: I just wanted to get back to, you know, those
Speaker 1: that to look, I was saying, like it disproportionately affects
Speaker 1: like people of color. So it's like seventy three of
Speaker 1: new infections are black people. UM of new infections are
Speaker 1: men um you know, UM. And the majority it's like
Speaker 1: sevent of new infections occur within the ages of twenty
Speaker 1: and forty, so you know, it's like young people who
Speaker 1: are becoming infected, which is why I understand why you know,
Speaker 1: AUC would want to give it out to college like
Speaker 1: their vitamins. It is absolutely and then I also read
Speaker 1: as well, UM, while she's the owing those stats around,
Speaker 1: I think it's important to remember as well that African
Speaker 1: Americans make up only twelve percent of the US UM
Speaker 1: and something that I read is that of HIV cases
Speaker 1: are African Americans. UM. So to know that is is
Speaker 1: pretty staggering and unfortunate. UM, we're gonna delve more further
Speaker 1: into HIV prep um some of the dope questions that
Speaker 1: that Wheezy has as well. But I kind of wanted
Speaker 1: to get into, you know, our kink of the week.
Speaker 1: So for the kink this week, I didn't really want
Speaker 1: to pick an actual kink. Um. I think it's important
Speaker 1: that as we do Kinks of the week money this
Speaker 1: is probably above episode a hundred or it's somewhere in
Speaker 1: the nineties. We're fucking almost over a hundred episodes at
Speaker 1: this point. But um, I wanted to discuss the difference
Speaker 1: between a kink and a fetish. So I think we
Speaker 1: talked about kinks a lot, and again, I guess I
Speaker 1: wanted to look look into this because um, I refer
Speaker 1: to me enjoying pegging as more of a kink that
Speaker 1: I enjoy part taking in. So I wanted to let
Speaker 1: you guys know the difference, UM real quick. A kink
Speaker 1: turns us on or or is considered outside of the
Speaker 1: predetermined norm for those of you who may have fetishes.
Speaker 1: Fetishes are more soda where you don't want to engage
Speaker 1: in sex without having this. Of course, it also pertasts
Speaker 1: the fantasies and things like that. But yeah, so foot
Speaker 1: fetishes people like like they so the feed. So this
Speaker 1: is how that is how, this is how they how
Speaker 1: they break it down. Kinks are like salt. They simply
Speaker 1: add to the flavor. Fetishes are like the food itself.
Speaker 1: Without them, there is no meal. So there's a way
Speaker 1: to look. So there are people who have kinks. I think,
Speaker 1: I think there's kinks where you know what, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think you could have a lot of fetishes. Well,
Speaker 1: you can have multiple fetishes, I mean, but for someone
Speaker 1: you will you would want to So then I think
Speaker 1: I think a better way to maybe word that how
Speaker 1: I've always thought of fetishes as something longer lasting than
Speaker 1: it is just one type of thing, like because kink
Speaker 1: to me is just one piece of the puzzle that
Speaker 1: you could try or something just like I don't know,
Speaker 1: maybe like just calling it something. But a fetish is
Speaker 1: something that you have ownership to, like it's your thing,
Speaker 1: part of your identity that like, I have a fetish
Speaker 1: for D S M. Right, that's like that's my jam.
Speaker 1: I would eat it. I would become a fetish. But
Speaker 1: you're you also, would you say, for the most part,
Speaker 1: you're always in some sort of the fashion. B D
Speaker 1: s M, of course is a wide range, but your
Speaker 1: sub for the most part, even without trying to be
Speaker 1: you're in a sub state when you're having sex, so
Speaker 1: even though you're not going through the whole, probably yeah,
Speaker 1: I t seven out of ten times. Yeah, so like
Speaker 1: with me, I brought this up of course because of course, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Peggy Bundy Ya gave me some great fame. I will say,
Speaker 1: pegasaurus rex like I didn't hurt it all, um, but no, seriously,
Speaker 1: like I've had some great but for Peggy, I will say,
Speaker 1: even when it comes to my partners, I don't peg everyone.
Speaker 1: It's not needed. I will say when I may. You
Speaker 1: ask every when I'm vetting, I will say I do Like, Um,
Speaker 1: I would say, b D s M is also probably
Speaker 1: my fetish, but I'm more on the dominant side, and
Speaker 1: to me, having access to a man's but makes me
Speaker 1: feel fucking in control and dominant as probably violating as well.
Speaker 1: But yeah, so like, but do I have to peg
Speaker 1: every partner that I have? No, Like I've been sucking
Speaker 1: for five years, never ever have pegged. It's so funny
Speaker 1: you're describing pegging this way. I just want to I
Speaker 1: went on inter Ho Uprising, and they wanted to talk
Speaker 1: to me about pegging, and I did not describe it
Speaker 1: in a dominating way at all. To me, it's very
Speaker 1: I was having a conversation with someone about that. They
Speaker 1: were like, well, I feel like I would never want
Speaker 1: to peg someone because I like to be submissive, And
Speaker 1: I was like, have you ever had sex? So like,
Speaker 1: here's the thing, Like, that's what I'm saying someone and
Speaker 1: I did have, you could have someone. I did have
Speaker 1: a nigga ride me and that was but I also
Speaker 1: felt like it was me giving him a different type
Speaker 1: of Like to me, pegging is in the highest sense
Speaker 1: a dominant So here's why I think that sometimes there's
Speaker 1: a catch twenty two with this because for me, I'm
Speaker 1: a submissive person that enjoys giving people pleasure no matter
Speaker 1: how they enjoy it. Right, we do sit here and
Speaker 1: say that, you know. So the issue that men have
Speaker 1: with pegging is giving up their masculinity, right. They think
Speaker 1: their masculinity is in their assholes. So the problem with
Speaker 1: always describing it as like fucking the ship out of
Speaker 1: somebody in their ass being like dominating is that then
Speaker 1: men who are dominant won't be interested. So for my
Speaker 1: experiences with pegging, it's never really been like bent over
Speaker 1: ship like it's always started for me, Like the first
Speaker 1: few years, I never really even knew the term until
Speaker 1: I watched Broad City was using toys like in their ass,
Speaker 1: but never bent. So once I actually had a strap
Speaker 1: on on for my first time, it still wasn't bent
Speaker 1: like were you on? It was like missionary. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what I'm saying. That doesn't feel well, that's probably
Speaker 1: why to me, like I prefer get on all four.
Speaker 1: So he was like to see them bets in those
Speaker 1: type of and those type of positions, I would say
Speaker 1: is probably again that goes to my dominant side. But
Speaker 1: dominance BDSMB being bent over one person has control, yeah,
Speaker 1: and so that's kind of power bottom, power bottom. I
Speaker 1: feel like when he was writing he became a power
Speaker 1: bottom right though he was on top, but then he
Speaker 1: had control right back right, what's the bottom? The bottom
Speaker 1: is just the term we get right type is someone
Speaker 1: that's giving the dick inserted versus receptive. Right there you go,
Speaker 1: So like if I like them to just look at
Speaker 1: you bring it, we'd be like taking it receiving. You
Speaker 1: hear about power bottoms. It's normally someone that quote unquote
Speaker 1: throws it back, right, I'll be asking why writing like
Speaker 1: back definitely a power bottom, even when like during Missionary,
Speaker 1: I think I'm always like still sucking someone back. But
Speaker 1: how are you submissive and a power bottom? So I
Speaker 1: definitely can switch, right, Okay, But I think that power
Speaker 1: bottom for me is just not necessarily a dominant side
Speaker 1: because I know how to suck somebody back. I still
Speaker 1: like you could basically talk to me and make me
Speaker 1: fuck you back, you know what I mean. It's crazy
Speaker 1: to me because again I feel like even the fucking
Speaker 1: back I feel like plays back into my dominance. Like
Speaker 1: like like I say I'm a power bottom, I mean
Speaker 1: like I'm the dominant seven is very dominant in bed,
Speaker 1: he fucking fu the goddamn shit out of me. Literally,
Speaker 1: it don't be messy. Let me not say literally, but
Speaker 1: because all of that, right, but the dominance in me,
Speaker 1: like while he's fucking me very very hard, is me
Speaker 1: taking the dick and I sit here and pride myself
Speaker 1: and being able to take it all like that again
Speaker 1: is my dominance part of it. Like, so even when
Speaker 1: I do say I'm a switch, I feel like thinking
Speaker 1: of it that way, I feel like at all times
Speaker 1: I like to feel like I'm in control, So me
Speaker 1: taking the dick is me being in control, even if
Speaker 1: he feels like he's more in control. Power bottom for
Speaker 1: me is just no one I could suck back because
Speaker 1: I don't like that, especially like having a lot of
Speaker 1: three stilms, or like fucking girls, even whether it be
Speaker 1: toys or straps. Like I've seen women that don't fuck back,
Speaker 1: you know, they're kind of like y'all have time. I'm
Speaker 1: a fellow princess, don't drunk. I'm only fellow princess when
Speaker 1: I really don't want to fuck you like that. And
Speaker 1: then I don't know why I'm sucking you in real life,
Speaker 1: Like what am I doing? But I don't want to come?
Speaker 1: But it's not you. It's not like I didn't It's
Speaker 1: not like I'm forced into fucking this dude. It's just
Speaker 1: like I just need to get off, Like sometimes you
Speaker 1: want to have sex, but you're thinking about somebody else
Speaker 1: that all the time, because you know, how do you
Speaker 1: know how awful it is to sit here and nigga
Speaker 1: and then as soon as y'all are done fucking you,
Speaker 1: texting the nigga that you wish it was fucky done,
Speaker 1: and I'd be like, is that not terrible? Look Like
Speaker 1: recently I was talking about scissors, but he was into it.
Speaker 1: Like I was like, damn, I wish I was easy
Speaker 1: busy right now he was like word and he was
Speaker 1: it was he was like getting off at the ship.
Speaker 1: But that's a girl like I'm talking about me fucking
Speaker 1: a dick wanting another dick. Like that's a good point.
Speaker 1: I guess I wanted like, you know, the side of
Speaker 1: mash and I didn't want the whole new steak. There
Speaker 1: you go, That's exactly what it was. That's exactly what
Speaker 1: well I wanted to again to bring that up, I
Speaker 1: think we've had kink of the week since we started
Speaker 1: this show, and I think it was very interesting when
Speaker 1: I saw that there is a difference between kink and
Speaker 1: fetish um and again, so I want you all to
Speaker 1: know that Peggy is my kink. I don't need it,
Speaker 1: but you know it's cool if I could get it. Um.
Speaker 1: So now we're gonna go ahead and get into our
Speaker 1: whole decision. This is where I guess you can maybe
Speaker 1: even we can delve back into I guess I want
Speaker 1: to focus on prep for this, but also the testing
Speaker 1: that goes on, how you respond when you do get
Speaker 1: a positive result and we all your thing. But I
Speaker 1: find that like the most interesting thing for me when
Speaker 1: learning about, you know, new STDs and like how people
Speaker 1: deal with them, because I've been fortunate enough to where
Speaker 1: I've had partners. Luckily I've never you know, had it
Speaker 1: happened where I've had it too, but I've had a partners,
Speaker 1: I've had sex with text maybe like I found out
Speaker 1: I got this or whatever. But I do want to
Speaker 1: know when you know you're doing the mobile bus ship
Speaker 1: and someone has it, and how often does someone have it?
Speaker 1: Like do you feel like you're doing like five out
Speaker 1: of a hundred, Like you feel like every hour you're
Speaker 1: telling someone they have HIV only because we hear the
Speaker 1: word epidemic and you know what I'm saying, I feel
Speaker 1: like it sound like hear that word work um for
Speaker 1: three year. We started off as interns and then that
Speaker 1: led to us working. We've we've been around this and
Speaker 1: in my time, I feel like I've had four but
Speaker 1: honestly they were all So how any that you've done
Speaker 1: that's a really five hundred thousand probably not not definitely,
Speaker 1: not a thousand, but hundreds of only four. I just
Speaker 1: had someone and I hate, like I hate doing testing. Um,
Speaker 1: it just just because the PaperWorks. Not a hundreds and
Speaker 1: only four people. That's like less than one percent, right,
Speaker 1: But also, I mean, I think, so, how does the
Speaker 1: probability with that number that you just gave as someone
Speaker 1: that works there, especially in a neighborhood like a alphabet city.
Speaker 1: So I'm on the Upper West Side, so we have
Speaker 1: six locations and Janell's and the Lower Eastide I'm on.
Speaker 1: You notice the difference with a certain neighborhoods Um, definitely.
Speaker 1: I mean we also have a Brooklyn the Bronx, and
Speaker 1: then we have a site in um Chelsea. So then
Speaker 1: for the prep patients there there primarily it's white gay men.
Speaker 1: But for me, pretty much all of my patients are
Speaker 1: people of color. So I mean, yeah, it's definitely there,
Speaker 1: there's different demographics. But I've only had one positive person.
Speaker 1: Like even though I say that I've been um working
Speaker 1: as an intern for about like three or four years here,
Speaker 1: I just started this position as a tester for about
Speaker 1: like a year and a half. Weld that we could
Speaker 1: have got we would have canceled this whole show, I'm
Speaker 1: telling you right now, made everybody in the engineer these bitches.
Speaker 1: No offense, everybody. No, it's confidential. So like we're not
Speaker 1: allowed to tell you know, anyone year you're we would
Speaker 1: have done it right here on air. Then we should
Speaker 1: have did that. That would have been cool. That would
Speaker 1: have been cool. Damn, I didn't even think of that time.
Speaker 1: It hurts. Okay, So how how was that experience? You
Speaker 1: sat here and you got someone who tested positive HIV?
Speaker 1: What was how did you tell them? Okay? So what
Speaker 1: the fact that we want to be negative normally positive
Speaker 1: is a good thing in life. So I think it's
Speaker 1: weird that it's it's looking for a result and it's there,
Speaker 1: it's a positive. Let's see. That's I think part of
Speaker 1: it too, that like, um, New York City has started
Speaker 1: to do this thing where it's called status neutral care
Speaker 1: and like we don't care if you're positive or if
Speaker 1: you're negative. You know, like either result is a is
Speaker 1: a good result because you know, if you're positive, then
Speaker 1: you know, okay, I got to take this medication. Gonna
Speaker 1: say it is too And I like that because you
Speaker 1: know it's not a death sentence. And you know, HIV
Speaker 1: has gotten to the point where it's kind of like
Speaker 1: any other chronic health condition, diabetes, healthcare, people who are
Speaker 1: health care, heart disease. Sorry, people who have HIV link
Speaker 1: are living long, long lives, and they're dying of other
Speaker 1: things like cancer not related to their HIV or you
Speaker 1: you know, related to their obesity. Every day. It's everyday
Speaker 1: thing that if you're taking this vitamin, but it's you know,
Speaker 1: your medication, your life saving medication, then you are living
Speaker 1: a normal, normal life. Okay, so let's let's get back
Speaker 1: to this story to hear that I have a really
Speaker 1: interesting story. Okay, So, first off, it was during I
Speaker 1: do a lot of testing on the weekends, and we
Speaker 1: were at a church in the Bronx so it was
Speaker 1: mostly so mostly everyone there spoke Spanish and they were undocumented,
Speaker 1: and um so I went with my coworker. She speaks
Speaker 1: fluent Spanish. I could get around, like so I just
Speaker 1: printed out all of the questions Spanish, like I know
Speaker 1: enough them, like so, um I want but I wanted
Speaker 1: to practice because oh this one is she knows I
Speaker 1: know a little bit. But um so I just wrote
Speaker 1: out all the questions in Spanish, so um, my coworking.
Speaker 1: These are people who typically don't go UM to their
Speaker 1: not getting regular healthcare services, um, because they don't have
Speaker 1: insurance because they're documented, so it's really important for them
Speaker 1: to come to this event. So we were I think
Speaker 1: we must have tested like ten eleven people each that day.
Speaker 1: So and we're doing back to back to back, like
Speaker 1: barely got breaks. And it's like I don't I don't
Speaker 1: mind it because I'm like, I want to do this,
Speaker 1: like I know I'm helping prick always fingerprick. So um,
Speaker 1: so this is like my last patient. We're about to
Speaker 1: be done for the day. They made us food like
Speaker 1: I was looking forward to the food, like I was hungry. Now.
Speaker 1: It was a lot, and it was funny because the
Speaker 1: people they were trying to learn English and I was
Speaker 1: trying to practice my Spanish, but we were getting through it.
Speaker 1: And so I love that show. So this is my
Speaker 1: last patient. And and then I saw that her test
Speaker 1: came up positive. She was married. I think she was
Speaker 1: from She was Mexican, she had two kids. Everyone was there,
Speaker 1: so I had the wife and my coworker had the
Speaker 1: husband and the kids are just waiting in a little
Speaker 1: common area, and so I see a positive I see
Speaker 1: I see the line because we're able to tell if
Speaker 1: you're positive because you can see, um like a line,
Speaker 1: another line will show up. I kind of wish we
Speaker 1: brought test but anyways, okay, we don't want to hear
Speaker 1: you to educated so that they would be like, you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: um So anyway, so I see that she has a
Speaker 1: positive testers on and I'm like, you know, based on
Speaker 1: the questions and what she's saying, she's been married. They
Speaker 1: you know, some most married people are not using condoms.
Speaker 1: But she didn't say she had any other partners, so
Speaker 1: I'm like, so then, I mean, I'm also starting to
Speaker 1: freak out because I don't know Spanish that well, and
Speaker 1: so we have a language barrier, and I'm just like,
Speaker 1: how do you tell someone that they have This happened
Speaker 1: to me the other day, But like the lady spoke
Speaker 1: not Spaient creole, Asian creole. So I was like, I
Speaker 1: don't know what to say. We have like language hotline,
Speaker 1: so it's not like we're just you tell me, you
Speaker 1: do a test for someone, you gotta be like, I
Speaker 1: want to talk to them they because I've done that before.
Speaker 1: You google translate results yes, yeah, and and join the
Speaker 1: encounter like asking how many people did you have sex
Speaker 1: with that type? You let them read it on your
Speaker 1: phone and then I pressed saying that says it and
Speaker 1: I'm just kidding. I mean I've had to do that
Speaker 1: like in the center, and then I just type it
Speaker 1: like some stuff like because I can get by to
Speaker 1: how many people live with you? And like the questions
Speaker 1: that they asked some of them, but for the ones
Speaker 1: I didn't know, I just typed it and we got
Speaker 1: through it. So anyway, so, um, so her test results positive,
Speaker 1: and I'm starting to freak out because I'm like, I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna tell her obviously her first positive. Yeah, this
Speaker 1: is my first one also, So I went to go
Speaker 1: get my coworker and then she looked at me because
Speaker 1: she's like, Um, the husband's positive too. So we were like,
Speaker 1: so what did the husband say? Like I didn't. I
Speaker 1: didn't really even see him or his reaction. But it
Speaker 1: turns out so, um, the wife contracted it from the husband,
Speaker 1: and um just that he I think, oh she told
Speaker 1: she ended up telling us, but I'll get into that.
Speaker 1: So she, um, she contracted from her husband, and um,
Speaker 1: this brings up a bigger issue if they were both undocumented,
Speaker 1: so they probably didn't receive proper healthcare and proper education
Speaker 1: about the disease. So I don't for some reason the
Speaker 1: wife thought that UM, even though she knew she was positive,
Speaker 1: for some reason, she was just trying to test to
Speaker 1: see if they're gonna come up positive. I'm taking my medication.
Speaker 1: Are you going to be able to tell UM from
Speaker 1: that that she knew she was positive and she was.
Speaker 1: Did you guys test the kids? No? We did. We
Speaker 1: didn't test the kids. Um. UM, Now would you suggest
Speaker 1: if someone has HIV and there living with kids, like
Speaker 1: you're not you know what I mean, Like it's not
Speaker 1: a sexual relationship at that point, your kids be taking medicine.
Speaker 1: How did that work? I think UM roommates. If the
Speaker 1: mother was not tested before having having the child, UM,
Speaker 1: then for sure I would test those kids. And since
Speaker 1: they're undocumented, we're not really sure like what type of
Speaker 1: health could they were receiving. I would probably suggest that
Speaker 1: those kids be tested. But in the in the US,
Speaker 1: like UM, all pregnant women receiving HIV tests, like you know,
Speaker 1: that's like just part of the standard care. But it's
Speaker 1: even it's even it's I want to dove into this
Speaker 1: because it's not only with pregnant women, but a lot
Speaker 1: of times UM, any woman who's undergoing any type of surgery.
Speaker 1: So I had a weight loss surgery, and because UM
Speaker 1: HIV does affect the white blood cell count, UM, they
Speaker 1: want to They tested me for just about everything because
Speaker 1: that would dictate how I healed after surgery. So if
Speaker 1: any woman, whether you're getting like your tonsils, like maybe
Speaker 1: not tonsils removed, but any any type of UM surgery
Speaker 1: where you're going to be hospitalized or put under anesthesia,
Speaker 1: or where they're cutting into of course is very UM important.
Speaker 1: You'll be tested for HIV in the in the hospitals.
Speaker 1: What are the ways you can get HIV? That isn't sex? Okay,
Speaker 1: So yeah, I wanted to get into that too, because
Speaker 1: there's six different fluids from which you So it's breast milk, blood,
Speaker 1: semen pre come so they call it seminal fluid, and
Speaker 1: then pre seminal fluid, vaginal um fluid, and rectal fluid.
Speaker 1: Aren't sex though, okay, So that aren't sex, would be
Speaker 1: breast milk mother to child transmission UM. Also like when
Speaker 1: the mother is having the baby like that that blood.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of blood going on there. That's another
Speaker 1: way that the mother can transmit it to the child,
Speaker 1: which is what doesn't surprise me, because I don't know
Speaker 1: if you'll be drinking milk which there's pus and blood. Yeah, milk,
Speaker 1: I've watched my friend that should is disgusting. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's not disgusting. Thank god, we're like us. We're the
Speaker 1: only mammals that drink other mammals milk. Yeah, it's disgusting.
Speaker 1: Not milk, even my ice creamy be like toasts. I
Speaker 1: stopped drinking regular milk, but same, I thought I meant
Speaker 1: like breast milk, like just watching it like come out
Speaker 1: and ship like that. So I guess it's what you
Speaker 1: were I guess were asking would be So I know
Speaker 1: that the h of the epidemic in New York happened
Speaker 1: specifically in the eighties because of the drug epidemic that happened.
Speaker 1: So of course, needle dirty needles, So that's maybe the
Speaker 1: tattoo that we brought up, like if you get tatted
Speaker 1: with dirty needles that were used on sharing. So I
Speaker 1: want to ask that would that not be airborne? Would
Speaker 1: it not be able to get off of the needle, Like,
Speaker 1: how does that well, I know with um in terms
Speaker 1: of like syringes, if you're that's that's how a lot
Speaker 1: of people were. OK. Yeah, so then that's why there's
Speaker 1: a lot of needle exchange programs and people can go
Speaker 1: exchange their dirty needles called works. And I heard some
Speaker 1: cool things about Market Street in San franci I was
Speaker 1: born in San France and then to go just like
Speaker 1: kind of revisits her family and like different places like
Speaker 1: where I grew up. And while I was there on
Speaker 1: Market Street right, this is where like Bloomingdale's is. It's
Speaker 1: like the most I don't know if you guys have
Speaker 1: been like a bougie like neighborhood in San Francisco. Also
Speaker 1: where the most drugs are sold and done right, kind
Speaker 1: of like Atlanta where it's like one pretty block and
Speaker 1: then one shitty block. So New York to New York,
Speaker 1: I think New York, I don't think there's just really
Speaker 1: I've never seen like a gorgeous block where you can't
Speaker 1: see a homeless man, like I've never like I've been
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like I've never been to
Speaker 1: an area where I feel like this will just not happen.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean in Queens far out. Maybe not
Speaker 1: on the island, but if you go to Queen's side,
Speaker 1: maybe hopeless people backed out. People could like project right across.
Speaker 1: There's projects across this block. Like no, lie, Like I
Speaker 1: was at a fucking ritz and it was like really
Speaker 1: like like I was shy. I've never seen something like this,
Speaker 1: not from zero to a hunt. It like turn the
Speaker 1: block and like I never saw someone shoot up in
Speaker 1: the street, multiple people shooting up like that really like
Speaker 1: with Darring. So come to find out, I'm talking to
Speaker 1: someone at the bar there later that day at the
Speaker 1: hotel and he's like, yeah, Like the way it works
Speaker 1: is they have these safe zones where people can't get arrested.
Speaker 1: But the deal with the safe dome zones to stop
Speaker 1: the HIV epidemic is there are people to distribute safe needles.
Speaker 1: So they're basically so worried about the virus spreading that
Speaker 1: like cops can't come to you here, you can come
Speaker 1: get your needles here. And yeah, I wonder if in
Speaker 1: l A So they have what is this, I don't
Speaker 1: want to call it death row. Yeah here we go,
Speaker 1: here I go. Its something like that, but all the
Speaker 1: homeless people where they also don't get in trouble for
Speaker 1: living in these tense in l A. I wonder if
Speaker 1: they do anything like that around there. I'm sure they do.
Speaker 1: Needle exchange programs are like really, you know, a huge
Speaker 1: part of harm reduction UM and so like along with HIV,
Speaker 1: honestly um injection drug transmission, so like sharing needles HIV
Speaker 1: like of course it is a huge concern, But the
Speaker 1: bigger concern with that is actually hepsi UM that you
Speaker 1: know affects your liver and you know, once your liver
Speaker 1: is messed up zero take those shots in school, so
Speaker 1: you can get hepatitis A and B, but not C right, right, right, right, right,
Speaker 1: we know we've got some shots can get from sucking,
Speaker 1: Yes you can, but it's actually it's more rare than HIV. Right,
Speaker 1: So HIV is easier to get through sex, and HEPSI
Speaker 1: is not as easy to get through sex. But then
Speaker 1: on the opposite end, HEPSI is very easy to transmit
Speaker 1: through like sharing needles, and HIV is a little less likely. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: I think, but they're like, you can be a lot
Speaker 1: of people are co infected, which means they have both
Speaker 1: um at the same time, and that causes a lot
Speaker 1: of complications with you know, just like the body. And
Speaker 1: we do have a I mean people, I feel fucked
Speaker 1: up after this. No, no, no, you guys are doing
Speaker 1: a great thing. But I'm getting sat We're going to
Speaker 1: turn it around. So U we got a song? No, No,
Speaker 1: take a family guy, Aids. Do you know what that is? No?
Speaker 1: What's the family guy? You want know? I want to
Speaker 1: put the clip in for the family guy. You've got
Speaker 1: eight song? Like you remember that they were trying to
Speaker 1: find this nice way to tell a patient they had
Speaker 1: eights or something, and so they like did this whole
Speaker 1: song and dance and the guys like in the hospital
Speaker 1: like HIV. But blow Aids like that. I got a
Speaker 1: nick for delivering bad news. I don't know how to
Speaker 1: tell you this, Mr Davenny, so I'll let these guys
Speaker 1: do it. You have a I hate to tell you,
Speaker 1: boy that you have a You got the You may
Speaker 1: you've caught it when you struck that filthy needle in
Speaker 1: here or maybe all the unprotected sex, but you it
Speaker 1: isn't clear. But but we're certain is you have a. Yes,
Speaker 1: you have a not HIV, but be sure that you
Speaker 1: see that this is not CHIV. Really, I'm sorry, I
Speaker 1: wish it was something less serious, but you've got, I
Speaker 1: mean to find out that you have HIV. Like I
Speaker 1: said before, it could be a really good thing because
Speaker 1: then you can take care of yourself with the medication,
Speaker 1: which which is what I wanted to bring up. So
Speaker 1: I guess there's a lot of and this can tie
Speaker 1: in the end of it. So the difference between HIV
Speaker 1: and AIDS and HIV become AIDS and AIDS. Can you
Speaker 1: skip HIV and go straight to AIDS? How does that work?
Speaker 1: Because easy just got AIDS out of nowhere and died
Speaker 1: like two months later. But apparently that's a that's a
Speaker 1: you know that was also like that time period. So
Speaker 1: having that, do you want to take this? Alverad? You
Speaker 1: want me to do this? Because they're both figuring out
Speaker 1: who won't break this down? Right? I mean we can
Speaker 1: take let's start with HIV, U B, HIV ub A.
Speaker 1: Can we not turn them into HIV and eight? Okay? Okay,
Speaker 1: was awful? What was it again? Okay? So HIV stands
Speaker 1: for human, which means it's only in humans. Immuno deficiency
Speaker 1: which means it affects your immune system. Your immune system
Speaker 1: are all the cells that are kind of like little
Speaker 1: soldiers in your body to protect you from outside invaders
Speaker 1: like bacteria and viruses and you know, bad stuff pathogens,
Speaker 1: but right, and not that. And then virus which means
Speaker 1: that it's a virus, which means it needs to live
Speaker 1: inside of a cell in order to live. And so
Speaker 1: the cells that the HIV virus lives in are the
Speaker 1: c D four cells UM, which are a form of
Speaker 1: T cell in your body. Got exactly, So human is
Speaker 1: the age. That's why the hum and with the virus,
Speaker 1: you will always have a virus. And so when back
Speaker 1: to that patient that I had, we had to explain
Speaker 1: to her you're always going to be positive. So it's
Speaker 1: herpies of virus yes, yes, okay yeah um. And then
Speaker 1: with AIDS, so that's acquired immuno deficiency syndrome. So that's
Speaker 1: it's basically like in if you want to think about
Speaker 1: it this way, like someone had HIV, they didn't they
Speaker 1: weren't intervened, and they didn't receive anti retroviral. The virus
Speaker 1: kept making copies and it took over How long does
Speaker 1: that process take it takes like it takes about ten
Speaker 1: years for if you are untreated. Yeah, but but for
Speaker 1: some people can take longer. But that's promising because that
Speaker 1: means that like you have some time if you don't
Speaker 1: get tested and okay, right, So it's why it's important
Speaker 1: to definitely get on medication exactly right, you get on
Speaker 1: like what are the probability of what is the probability
Speaker 1: of dying with you have AIDS? Um quick? I mean,
Speaker 1: because now your immune system is so compromised, and most
Speaker 1: people don't. You don't die of AIDS, you dive in
Speaker 1: AIDS related um exactly, or the flu a common cold,
Speaker 1: so um. Once you have AIDS. So AIDS is sort
Speaker 1: of like a classification. It's a diagnosis, and once you
Speaker 1: get an AIDS diagnosis, you never lose that diagnosis, like
Speaker 1: from your medical chart. Um. And so like the things
Speaker 1: that kind of classify you as having AIDS would be
Speaker 1: having like an aid's defining illness like car posy sarcoma,
Speaker 1: like different types of rare cancers, or just simply like
Speaker 1: if you're um, if your c D four count is
Speaker 1: less than two hundred, um that so that means that
Speaker 1: you don't have a lot of a lot of viral
Speaker 1: cell or so you don't have a lot of cells
Speaker 1: protecting you UM in your immune system. That was like,
Speaker 1: that'll be honest with you, Like I just got tested.
Speaker 1: What had a fingerprick? Um a few weeks ago we
Speaker 1: recorded that episode. I just want to get it again.
Speaker 1: I'm scared right well, And that was actually one of
Speaker 1: my new have you had unprotected sex? Okay, world, if
Speaker 1: you you can ask us personal questions? But then I
Speaker 1: felt like weird. We did that a whole episode where
Speaker 1: were talked about our goddamn abortions and y'all see here
Speaker 1: and talking about can we ask Yeah, I haven't had
Speaker 1: unprotected sex since I haven't had underprospective sex in a while.
Speaker 1: I have with a woman, but um, it's it's like, um,
Speaker 1: female to female transmission is very low and you'd be
Speaker 1: liking scissoring. But that's like and I mean bringing up women.
Speaker 1: So a lot of the times when people think of HIV,
Speaker 1: they're only thinking of men and men having sex with
Speaker 1: men typically, and women, especially Black women, are often left
Speaker 1: out of the conversation, which is how we sold a
Speaker 1: fun part of our job. Let's light in the mood
Speaker 1: to talk about sipping and spilling so that I'm gonna die,
Speaker 1: You're not gonna sit been right, So that's what we UM.
Speaker 1: We took over now after UM have to shout her
Speaker 1: name out. Her name is Sechia Robin Sekia, but UM.
Speaker 1: She was also an intern with us and she wanted
Speaker 1: to start doing these events to UM to just empower
Speaker 1: black women to take control of their sexual health. And
Speaker 1: so then after when she finished her internship, we were
Speaker 1: asked to take it on and we just made it
Speaker 1: more sex positive and more inclusive. You guys are testing there.
Speaker 1: We don't do testing there, but we're going we're looking
Speaker 1: into that for because you know we've had UM Hall
Speaker 1: at some of the events, it's like a wind down,
Speaker 1: like the wind down, So we make it a fun
Speaker 1: way to talk about sex and UM for our last right,
Speaker 1: for our last event, you guys can come to the
Speaker 1: next one if you want, UM. But for the last
Speaker 1: one we had UM Sam from Inner Hall Uprising. She
Speaker 1: was our moderator, so UM. So then we had people
Speaker 1: submit questions like relationship questions, and then we just snuck
Speaker 1: a little prep and PEP and HIV testing related questions
Speaker 1: we had into with the okay, So PREP stands for
Speaker 1: pre exposure prophylaxis UM. That means it's a pill that
Speaker 1: you take before UM you come into contact with HIV.
Speaker 1: So it's something that you have to take every single day, UM,
Speaker 1: like around the same time every day. It's kind of
Speaker 1: like birth control, but for HIV from Vinny UM. He's
Speaker 1: been on our show and he started taking PREP and
Speaker 1: he was like, Yo, my body, Like He's like, I
Speaker 1: just can't wait for to getting my system because it
Speaker 1: feels so weird this year. So yeah, I think it's
Speaker 1: like only people though really experience side effects. And the
Speaker 1: side effects are like nausea, vomiting, diarrhea. Some people said
Speaker 1: weight loss. I said, I wish. So here here's the
Speaker 1: thing that I wanted to ask pertaining to prep UM.
Speaker 1: So going to Nigeria, I had to get the yellow
Speaker 1: fever vaccine. Everyone knows of the flu vaccine every um
Speaker 1: during around this time of year. And so to me,
Speaker 1: what I learned with vaccine is that what it actually
Speaker 1: does is it infects your body with with the virus
Speaker 1: so that your body can and fight the virus off,
Speaker 1: which is weirdest to me. It's kind of like UM,
Speaker 1: so it's kind of like, um, you know, I'm sure
Speaker 1: in the military and stuff, the soldiers they'd be doing
Speaker 1: like practice or whatever. It's kind of like that. So
Speaker 1: they give you a little bit of virus. They don't
Speaker 1: and not all the time they give you the full virus.
Speaker 1: In a lot of cases they just give you like
Speaker 1: pieces of the virus chopped up, so your body can
Speaker 1: kind of seem like that's what it looks like. Doesn't
Speaker 1: do that, right, It doesn't do that. Not putting HIV
Speaker 1: into our body. PREP is not putting HTV into your body.
Speaker 1: PREP has two medications interested being into off of year.
Speaker 1: These medications are they basically stop reverse trans I'm getting
Speaker 1: really medical, but basically it's just it's medication from dividing
Speaker 1: or it stops the virus from dividing. Now it has
Speaker 1: been around, I know, I heard about it, like I've
Speaker 1: just recently heard pre the last two years. So PREP
Speaker 1: was EFTY true vada as PREP was EFTY approved in
Speaker 1: two thousand and twelve. Um. But for that true vada
Speaker 1: in the medication itself was FDA approved and has been
Speaker 1: around since like the two thousands. With well, now the
Speaker 1: commercials they try to trans Why is it because just
Speaker 1: advertised to men, and then they realized like, Okay, this
Speaker 1: isn't working, and also we need to have commercials. Is
Speaker 1: it stronger in men and not women? Like it's not.
Speaker 1: So basically, you know, a lot of municipalities New York, DC, Atlanta,
Speaker 1: they were saying, like, there's this huge HIV epidemic. It's
Speaker 1: affecting a lot of men, it's affecting a lot of
Speaker 1: young men. It's affecting a lot of young black, black
Speaker 1: and brown men. And you know it's true now that
Speaker 1: like if current epidemic rates continue, that like one in
Speaker 1: the lifetime risk of HIV infection for young black men
Speaker 1: is one and two for Latino men who have is
Speaker 1: one in four. Yeah, for men, for men who have
Speaker 1: sex with men, I'm sorry, not not just like heterosexual
Speaker 1: men are all men, but it's for men who have
Speaker 1: sex with men, the lifetime risk of getting HIV is
Speaker 1: one and two. That's really really scary, you know. And
Speaker 1: so they were looking at these statistics and they were like, well,
Speaker 1: we need to do something about it. And so they
Speaker 1: were trying to like, you know, pass out prep like
Speaker 1: it's vitamins um. And I don't necessarily agree with that
Speaker 1: because you know, there's a long make sure that you
Speaker 1: want and there's a long history of you know, just
Speaker 1: take what do you mean Because with with PREP, you
Speaker 1: need to you you need to take a daily so
Speaker 1: you need to That's that's um what's called adherents like
Speaker 1: birth control. Yeah, it's only gonna work like birth control.
Speaker 1: We always say that, like this is like birth control.
Speaker 1: It's only gonna work. But also like people who aren't
Speaker 1: adherent to PREP, if they're not taking enough of the
Speaker 1: medication and then they come to contact with the virus
Speaker 1: and they become infected, then the virus but they're still
Speaker 1: taking a little bit of true vada, but they're not
Speaker 1: taking like enough medication to UM like for treatment purposes.
Speaker 1: Then the virus can become smart and kind of get
Speaker 1: used to like true vada, and then it can become
Speaker 1: resistant to and like that, um so truvada. So tri vada.
Speaker 1: The two medications in trivada bonds, so it's always it's
Speaker 1: like two hundred to three, Like I'll see that in
Speaker 1: But if you've been taking PREP for like two years,
Speaker 1: you don't need to pump it up. No, But like okay, so,
Speaker 1: but truvada in it of itself, which is the only
Speaker 1: medication that is ft approved for PREP purposes. Like PREP
Speaker 1: is just kind of like birth control. It's like the
Speaker 1: umbrella term. And then true vada is like a form
Speaker 1: of PREP. It's the only form of PREP that we have.
Speaker 1: Now they're working on other forms. They are coming out
Speaker 1: with it like a gel a loobe. Do you guys
Speaker 1: to know, um, like cities or countries with the lowest
Speaker 1: race of HIV, just so we know where to travel.
Speaker 1: I don't actually ship us questions. I don't know, but
Speaker 1: I don't expect it. I mean, like probably in the
Speaker 1: Midwest where nobody lives. I mean, but I think that's
Speaker 1: where you be surprised at. Like then also you know them.
Speaker 1: We have a lot of other factors, And I mean
Speaker 1: there was there was there was a map that I saw.
Speaker 1: I did want to go ahead. And before we we
Speaker 1: we get into our homemail. UM. For individuals who may
Speaker 1: think that this is really pricey, that's a conversation a
Speaker 1: lot that this costs so much. UM you know the
Speaker 1: reasons why? You know, Um, Magic Johnson is able to
Speaker 1: live because you can afford it. UM. I was talking
Speaker 1: to Olmo prior to recording, and she actually said that
Speaker 1: it is free um or very low calls to anyone
Speaker 1: with insurance Medicaid, Medicare they cover it um and then
Speaker 1: how much would it be on the high end if
Speaker 1: you don't have insurance. So if you don't have insurance,
Speaker 1: you are don't qualify for any assistance programs. And you
Speaker 1: can't get it from like a study, because a lot
Speaker 1: of studies are you know, doing prep studies are giving
Speaker 1: you the prep for free, you know, if you can't
Speaker 1: get it any of those other ways, than it's fifteen
Speaker 1: hundred out of pocket month a month, yeah, which is
Speaker 1: very pricey most people, but most people qualify for some
Speaker 1: sort of assistance. The pharmaceutical company they have a coupon
Speaker 1: like a cope coupon for people who have private insurance,
Speaker 1: and then if you have Medicaid, you're good. And also
Speaker 1: the manufacturer of the drug lay also offer like a
Speaker 1: program where they cover the cost of those are completely.
Speaker 1: You get it for free as long as you make
Speaker 1: like under fifty and there's yeah, I'm sorry, but just
Speaker 1: thinking of the price. Like so I went to Mexico,
Speaker 1: right and while I was there, I bought probably twenty
Speaker 1: in Hailer's. They're only two dollars, and it's not necessarily
Speaker 1: that I need twenty. But I always noticed, like there's
Speaker 1: so many instances where I went to Denver to visit
Speaker 1: dub forgot mine Hailer, and it was so difficult to
Speaker 1: have a doctor write me that ken in Hailer's had
Speaker 1: to go on this website, tell a doc, find someone
Speaker 1: to call me, pay fifty dollars with that appointment just
Speaker 1: to get then Hailer like, it was ridiculous just for beauty,
Speaker 1: all just oxygen to breathe. So I bought all these
Speaker 1: inhalers I could have them. Bagra, I noticed was another
Speaker 1: thing my friends were asking me to buy, and then
Speaker 1: the next one I saw that people were buying like crazy.
Speaker 1: There was prep, yeah, but what was interesting about PREP
Speaker 1: in Mexico is like this guy behind me in line
Speaker 1: asked for it and she's like writing down something on
Speaker 1: this paper, enhands it to him. And there was a
Speaker 1: place for people to go get it. I don't even
Speaker 1: know if they sell it in their pharmacies, but like
Speaker 1: that's that might have been drugs its place as another
Speaker 1: time just exam X. There are certain prescriptions in Mexico
Speaker 1: that do require prescriptions, so most don't work, is why
Speaker 1: people have funing viagraph fetterman there. But PREP, I do
Speaker 1: think may have a prescription, and the guy really needed
Speaker 1: it or wanted it, and so she gave him a
Speaker 1: place to go get it. I mean, I feel like
Speaker 1: if I was in Mexico, I would and I was
Speaker 1: using PREP for the purposes of HIV prevention, which is
Speaker 1: really the only reason why you would be taking it.
Speaker 1: I would want to make sure that it was actually PREP,
Speaker 1: you know, because sometimes you go to other countries and um,
Speaker 1: their pharmaceutical industry isn't as regulated and sometimes the drugs
Speaker 1: aren't as effectively, might be expired, but blah blah, Like
Speaker 1: I wouldn't want to make sure I bought so I
Speaker 1: bought them a bit of birth control there too, because
Speaker 1: it's like a dollar. And then I was like checking
Speaker 1: the packs and one of them expired in a month,
Speaker 1: and she's like, oh you tick now, I'm sorry. That
Speaker 1: was not a Mexicans all the time in Chinatown. So
Speaker 1: it's like kind of you know, my brain. So I
Speaker 1: did pull up that map though, so it looks like
Speaker 1: fifty and this is a dot gov by the way,
Speaker 1: so we're not just googling again, guys, the South Maids
Speaker 1: makes up fifty of new HIV cases. Yes, and um,
Speaker 1: it looks like Georgia's the highest, then Florida, then Louisiana.
Speaker 1: Some of the lowest that I see probably like, um,
Speaker 1: looks like Utah, Wyoming is one seven bro um, Let's
Speaker 1: see what else California? Do you want to go there?
Speaker 1: Samoa has it's like zero some going on somewhe oh um.
Speaker 1: But my thing is why be worried about the map
Speaker 1: when we know that, like condoms are so affective. He's
Speaker 1: saying that, but I am curious to know is Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's true, but you know where it's spreading the lead.
Speaker 1: I want to go ahead and get into our homemail. Now.
Speaker 1: Before we get into the homemail, can you guys please
Speaker 1: read your shirt because I think it's awesome and I
Speaker 1: think this is also why I chose this. We want
Speaker 1: to shout out Kayla Robinson from Green Box shopf Um,
Speaker 1: we have the y B racist, sexist, homophobic, or transphobic
Speaker 1: when you could just be quite trips on the one
Speaker 1: that Frank Ocean wore like Panorama and then that's when
Speaker 1: she blew up, thank you, I did not know your
Speaker 1: name or Instagram. Kaylea, I just said to these girls
Speaker 1: and they walked in. I'm like, I feel like I
Speaker 1: have a short like this. And she came to the
Speaker 1: Zozo Talk in Miami and handed me some shirts. I've
Speaker 1: been wearing them and I'm like, I don't know who
Speaker 1: to the tag green Box shot. I think so thank
Speaker 1: you Green Box Shop guys checked them out. So the
Speaker 1: homemail for this week. By the way, guys, if you
Speaker 1: guys want to send in your homemail, you can email
Speaker 1: us at Horrible Decisions at gmail dot com. So it says,
Speaker 1: what's up, fam, I love the podcast many, I appreciate
Speaker 1: your organization, and WEEZEI, I admire your perspective. Together, you
Speaker 1: guys make a dope team. Okay, So to the meat.
Speaker 1: I met this sedge off tender let's call her sour Patch.
Speaker 1: I mean she was right, the right mix of feminine
Speaker 1: and masculine energy, sweet pussy. I couldn't ask for anything more.
Speaker 1: We've been talking for just a few months, but the
Speaker 1: chemistry was undeniable. She's from another state, so she flew
Speaker 1: in for the weekend. We've seen each other on four
Speaker 1: occasions now, ship. I thought we had a great time.
Speaker 1: Art exhibit movies pool. I mean we was chilling. Backstory,
Speaker 1: I'm married, currently separated, living in a different state for
Speaker 1: the last six months, and she's been single for five years.
Speaker 1: I probably could have started with that, huh. Anyway, So
Speaker 1: on the last night, I asked her, do you see
Speaker 1: this going anywhere? Her reply was some She said, I'm
Speaker 1: here with you, enjoying our time. I expressed that I
Speaker 1: just right right, that's all it is. I expressed that
Speaker 1: I just wanted to match where she is, continue to
Speaker 1: get to know her, but I just don't know what's
Speaker 1: doing too much or saying too much. I haven't been
Speaker 1: single in a long time. I thought she understood. Hindsight,
Speaker 1: I know she was like, I gotta get the funk
Speaker 1: out of here. That night ended in cuddles. Then when
Speaker 1: I dropped her off at the airport, the hug was
Speaker 1: long and the kiss was sweet. She let me know
Speaker 1: when she got She let me know when she got back.
Speaker 1: The next day, I didn't hear anything, which is normal
Speaker 1: behavior from her. I wasn't tripping. I just saw her.
Speaker 1: The following day. I'm blocked on social media and she
Speaker 1: blocked my number, no warning, no nothing. I'm actually writing
Speaker 1: this on day two of her ghosting, She's not coming back.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to lie. It took me back a
Speaker 1: little like finding out you got stung by a bee
Speaker 1: while you was trying to enjoy an ice cream cone.
Speaker 1: During her visit, we made plans together to come to
Speaker 1: the live show in Atlanta. I have two tickets and
Speaker 1: now no date. I think this girl wrote me and
Speaker 1: she was like, Yo, can I turn my ticket in
Speaker 1: foro V I P yes, you can. Yes, she wants
Speaker 1: to take a picture with us. Whoever is at the
Speaker 1: door go up and be like I'm the whole mail
Speaker 1: and then sincerely newly ghosted, um. And then I think
Speaker 1: it's so. I thought it was just an interesting letter, um,
Speaker 1: that that she sent in. Of course, honey, go ahead
Speaker 1: and hollidays. It's cold, it's a cold, cold world. But
Speaker 1: I think it's interesting, um. And it just made me
Speaker 1: think that I don't think a lot of us say
Speaker 1: what we want in the beginning of things, and we
Speaker 1: let things roll, and when things start getting good, maybe
Speaker 1: we do start applying pressure to situations where the other
Speaker 1: person isn't wanting pressure, the other person doesn't want a
Speaker 1: relationship and they're just enjoying your company. But unfortunately, when
Speaker 1: we enjoy someone's company, now we just want to be
Speaker 1: with them and it's like can we be with you now?
Speaker 1: Do we match? Are we gonna be married? Like? Are
Speaker 1: we can you be my girlfriend? Keeping my boyfriend? And
Speaker 1: unfortunately it does kind of scare people all away, UM
Speaker 1: more times than not. So thank you for your home mail.
Speaker 1: UM wanted to just read that. I thought it was
Speaker 1: interesting and we will be seeing you in Atlanta, honey,
Speaker 1: just know that, UM, so before we be a new
Speaker 1: person there. Yeah. Oh there's a ton of people. I
Speaker 1: did want to say that gay at our show where
Speaker 1: they'll be trying to eat we pussy like maybe, oh no, well,
Speaker 1: our fucking horrible decision shows are Honestly, I haven't had
Speaker 1: like one live show I've done in the last four
Speaker 1: live shows or any kind of Q and have done
Speaker 1: where someone hasn't asked to fuck me on the mic
Speaker 1: with their partners, we get a lot of like an
Speaker 1: UM shout out to blog melon and milk. She actually
Speaker 1: bought me like Dominatrix Lingerie for my Atlanta show. We
Speaker 1: have dopes um followers. But I guess again before we
Speaker 1: before we sign off, UM, where can our listeners maybe
Speaker 1: reach out to you or where can they get further
Speaker 1: information on PREP and HIV if you can go ahead
Speaker 1: and drop that. Okay, So, um, you guys can follow
Speaker 1: our page for anything PREP HIV related. It's called at
Speaker 1: Sipping and spilling so s I P p I n
Speaker 1: U yeah, and then spilling s p I l I
Speaker 1: n so no g's um. And then my personal instagram
Speaker 1: is j Arra so j a y underscore e r
Speaker 1: A h h. My instagram is at m O m
Speaker 1: O momo underscore Bologny b O l O g n
Speaker 1: A Bologna Bogna. That's what I mean. It's like boster
Speaker 1: By Arena song. We all knew that, right well g
Speaker 1: n A right yeah yeah. Um, and again we want
Speaker 1: to go ahead and shout out to everyone who's coming
Speaker 1: to see us on tour. Um for um, we're in
Speaker 1: Houston to three. We're gonna be at everybody in Texas,
Speaker 1: is right, and it's funny they all ready to get
Speaker 1: by the way for all of y'all that Um. I
Speaker 1: do just want to say this, So Atlanta was not
Speaker 1: a show that we added a show to, nor did
Speaker 1: we switch anything around. So unfortunately we are not giving
Speaker 1: you refunds because you want to go see B two
Speaker 1: K bitch, We're gonna come out to be too K
Speaker 1: for that ass. Okay, we're gonna see here and give
Speaker 1: you on that song. For those of that are just
Speaker 1: saying I can't make it anymore, I'm sorry. Um, I
Speaker 1: just wanted to throw that out there. Um. It was
Speaker 1: on the fine print we're not accepting refunds, um, but
Speaker 1: I just wanted to pay that out there. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: just saying all we had like thirty to five dollar
Speaker 1: tickets Randy from thirty five to fifty and two ks
Speaker 1: like people see they paid promo code. So we talked
Speaker 1: about regular people who just BUYK. They ain't Beyonce, Like
Speaker 1: I got a ticket and for free. So I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna bring scissors to the show. I'm buy The
Speaker 1: ticket was three and I was like, guess what, I'm
Speaker 1: only one call at the Hulu at the Hulu theater here. Um,
Speaker 1: but they're doing by the way, Um, we're looking to
Speaker 1: be doing our New York show the same day as
Speaker 1: the B TWOK. But it will be even flock to
Speaker 1: six o'clock four to stand. It's very close to the Venue.
Speaker 1: So you guys games if you're in Toronto, y'all, we
Speaker 1: did push that back to May and we are still
Speaker 1: working on Miami and l A Venue. So sorry for
Speaker 1: the change. But unfortunately with you know, we work out
Speaker 1: of theaters and so it's like someone books the week
Speaker 1: it's it's very difficult with us to get one day
Speaker 1: on the weekend. And yeah, but I do want to
Speaker 1: shout out to our Patreon listeners, So everyone that's heard
Speaker 1: this next episode, sorry, but for the rest of your
Speaker 1: motherfucker's you'll have a small clip enjoy this. Also, if
Speaker 1: you think that the episode you just listen to was great,
Speaker 1: thank you. If you think you could have done something
Speaker 1: better to help out with it, call us at the
Speaker 1: fifteen dollars here on Patreon. After four months we send
Speaker 1: out merch as well as call listeners for outline feedback
Speaker 1: and for help. You can pretty much produce an episode
Speaker 1: with us five dollars a month. You get three bonus
Speaker 1: episodes per month that's going to come out every Monday
Speaker 1: right after this show. So if you want some more,
Speaker 1: go on Patreon and you'll have a new episode waiting
Speaker 1: for you right now. Halla, this has been yet another
Speaker 1: episode of horrible decisions by a person I dated who
Speaker 1: was black before my current girlfriend, Nice is, she had
Speaker 1: dated other Asians previously, because I think it happens to
Speaker 1: be whatever is available. Because in the Bay Area, I
Speaker 1: think maybe there's just a surplus of Asian dudes. There's
Speaker 1: a lot of Asian dudes and a whole lot of
Speaker 1: black women. I don't know if there's a whole lot
Speaker 1: of black bay Area is asking us to come and
Speaker 1: they all black. Nice Yeah, I haven't seen you guys,
Speaker 1: Met and Kelly. Yeah, we moved here together. How long
Speaker 1: you've been together? Two? Wow? Wow? Two years? And you'll
Speaker 1: move across country together. Now, let me ask you made
Speaker 1: some jokes that I thought were great about your parents
Speaker 1: asking or I don't know if it's true, but the
Speaker 1: color of the skin, right, how dark? Things like that
Speaker 1: is a big thing. And you talk about that a
Speaker 1: little bit dating a black woman and if they were like,
Speaker 1: how how black? Yeah, that's that's how that's legit. My
Speaker 1: mom did ask how black is your girlfriend? And I
Speaker 1: had to show her a picture of ices and she said,
Speaker 1: oh my god, that's too black. He said, let me
Speaker 1: ask you, because we're getting into this. Yes, what was
Speaker 1: your response, did he clearly you've heard this because he
Speaker 1: didn't said this on stage? Yeah, what was your response
Speaker 1: to that? I was expecting it anyway, so I was
Speaker 1: prepared for it. We talked about this, like I think
Speaker 1: on our first date, where we're gonna have to get
Speaker 1: into the parent thing, the friend thing, what you guys
Speaker 1: think that's gonna be our horrible decision guys if you
Speaker 1: guys haven't pointed yet, but we're gonna go ahead and
Speaker 1: jump into vanilla ship. We're gonna kind of make it,
Speaker 1: make it a little couple never heard from our show.
Speaker 1: Vanilla Ship is basically where we find and an article
Speaker 1: or pick something that's going on the news current that
Speaker 1: related to sex and so, as y'all know, and and
Speaker 1: actually we was like, yeah, we kind of got to
Speaker 1: talk about this, and I don't know how late we're
Speaker 1: gonna be in this post. But as y'all know, um
Speaker 1: our queen, well, I guess she's not really our queen.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, not Beyonce bit my bad, okay, our princess
Speaker 1: um Cardi B broke up with um offset off the
Speaker 1: knob and so they're no longer together. Did you guys
Speaker 1: see did you guys a video now someone said, oh wow,
Speaker 1: she's topless and doing a customer service voice. So basically
Speaker 1: we're not together. We tried to make a war. Um
Speaker 1: but like I love when ratchet people do that, try
Speaker 1: to sound it's the best. I called to you over
Speaker 1: the other day scream and she was like, well, ma'am,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna really try to get this together for you.
Speaker 1: So I just that you relax. You know, she was
Speaker 1: black My fably have to switch the T mobile everyone. Sorry,
Speaker 1: the Indians pick up when I called for my every
Speaker 1: well they all now, Well, the thing is like most customers,
Speaker 1: I am actually no, you're not a lot of our
Speaker 1: Filipino though Filipino piso's got good English. They do, but
Speaker 1: you can also hear when it's like a Filipino trying
Speaker 1: to do you know, you're thank you, ma'am for calling
Speaker 1: an American Express. You're right. I mean, we's out there
Speaker 1: with all the ages by the nut follows. We're not
Speaker 1: gonna be for instable anyway. So I wanted to talk
Speaker 1: about because we haven't had a couple in a while.
Speaker 1: I don't think we've had a couple maybe since the
Speaker 1: Swinger episode. Um so before we get into these questions
Speaker 1: regarding the breakups, and you know, maybe the last straw.
Speaker 1: Are you guys monogamous? Yes, you guys are gonna Oh
Speaker 1: so this is gonna be fun as fun. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: are you a monogamous? Would you cheat together like a threesome?
Speaker 1: I love it? She was like, no, that was allowed.
Speaker 1: Y'all got the home show. You got to break them up.
Speaker 1: We'll back cross country.