1 00:00:01,720 --> 00:00:10,320 Speaker 1: Cool Zone Media book Club, book Club, book Club, book Club, 2 00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:13,800 Speaker 1: Hello and welcome Nichol's on Media book Club, the only 3 00:00:13,840 --> 00:00:15,920 Speaker 1: book club where you don't have to do the reading 4 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:19,079 Speaker 1: because I do it for you. I'm Druse Margaret Giljoy, 5 00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:22,880 Speaker 1: and today I have a story for you. I suppose 6 00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:24,319 Speaker 1: I have a story for you every week, but this 7 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:28,040 Speaker 1: week I have a story for you. It is luscious, 8 00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:33,600 Speaker 1: it is delicate, it is complicated, and it doesn't quite 9 00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:38,239 Speaker 1: have a plot. But Hazel and I both agree that 10 00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:42,360 Speaker 1: it's honestly better for it in this particular story. Do 11 00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:44,680 Speaker 1: you trust us? Do you trust us for a story 12 00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:48,760 Speaker 1: like that? Please trust us on this one. This story 13 00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:52,040 Speaker 1: is from a longtime collaborator of mine, someone who I've 14 00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:54,760 Speaker 1: worked with on projects here and there throughout the years 15 00:00:54,840 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 1: because she's such an incredible writer, Kelly Rose Flugback, who 16 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,480 Speaker 1: is a writer an editor living in so called Canada. 17 00:01:03,160 --> 00:01:05,880 Speaker 1: This story is also set in Canada, in and around 18 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:10,120 Speaker 1: a community near Wawanosh, which I looked up trying to 19 00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:14,560 Speaker 1: find out how to pronounce and listen to approximately eight 20 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:17,360 Speaker 1: different pronunciations, and all of them were produced by a machine. 21 00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:20,720 Speaker 1: And I don't trust that pronunciation, so Woahwanosh it is. 22 00:01:22,360 --> 00:01:25,600 Speaker 1: It's about three hours west of Toronto on Lake Huran. 23 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:30,680 Speaker 1: It appeared originally in Strange Horizons magazine in twenty thirteen. 24 00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:35,160 Speaker 1: It's a real quote unquote classic book club story in 25 00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:39,320 Speaker 1: that it is a story about climate and governance and sadness. 26 00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:41,760 Speaker 1: But it's so much more subtle and haunting than just 27 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:43,720 Speaker 1: saying it like that. It's a really good story. Do 28 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:47,160 Speaker 1: you trust us? Please trust us on this one. It 29 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:49,960 Speaker 1: is a great story for the false Spring. Probably about 30 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:52,640 Speaker 1: half of you are experiencing what I'm experiencing, which is 31 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:57,160 Speaker 1: the false spring after the coldest winter in five to 32 00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 1: twenty years, depending on where you are. If you spend 33 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:04,040 Speaker 1: all your time looking at charts of weather like I do. Anyway, 34 00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:07,360 Speaker 1: I can't really explain the story any better because you 35 00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:09,960 Speaker 1: should just listen to it. Maybe you'll listen to it 36 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:13,400 Speaker 1: while you take a pleasant but unseasonably warm walk, or 37 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:16,560 Speaker 1: you live out west and it's been unseasonably warm for 38 00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:18,239 Speaker 1: a long time, or you live somewhere else in the 39 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:19,960 Speaker 1: world where I don't look at the maps of weather, 40 00:02:20,639 --> 00:02:24,240 Speaker 1: including the country where this is set, because I tend 41 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:26,680 Speaker 1: to only look at the maps of weather in the 42 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:30,440 Speaker 1: United states. I don't feel proud of that, but now 43 00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:34,800 Speaker 1: you all know about my weather watching habits, and I 44 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:39,560 Speaker 1: feel like that's important. Please join me in reading. Well, 45 00:02:39,639 --> 00:02:41,040 Speaker 1: you all are going to listen. I'm going to do 46 00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:46,040 Speaker 1: the reading. The clover still grows wild in Wawanoshe by 47 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:52,760 Speaker 1: Kelly Rose Flugback. Doctor Hanson presses the cold bell of 48 00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:56,320 Speaker 1: her stethoscope against my chest, and I watch the lines 49 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:59,720 Speaker 1: in her face deepen. It's dark in the room, and 50 00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:04,040 Speaker 1: the watermarks in the ceilings cracked plaster, look like continents, 51 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:06,960 Speaker 1: like places I've never been marked on a map I've 52 00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:11,720 Speaker 1: seen once and forgotten. It's daytime outside, and the cold 53 00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:15,399 Speaker 1: light of early spring filters in pale and weak through 54 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:20,000 Speaker 1: the newsprint she keeps taped over the windows. Most people 55 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:22,679 Speaker 1: don't know this, but doctor Hanson is the kind of 56 00:03:22,760 --> 00:03:26,600 Speaker 1: doctor that helps people too. She used to work in 57 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:29,480 Speaker 1: a hospital like other doctors, and wear a white coat 58 00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:33,000 Speaker 1: and frown over her patients like she frowns over me now, 59 00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:36,880 Speaker 1: in a broken down old house outside the city's walls. 60 00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:40,480 Speaker 1: When I talk to her out loud, I call her Josepha, 61 00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:42,760 Speaker 1: But in my head I still think of her as 62 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:45,600 Speaker 1: doctor Hanson, the way I first heard it on the 63 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:49,280 Speaker 1: radio five years ago. Her face is different now than 64 00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:52,760 Speaker 1: it was in the photographs. Her nose is different, and 65 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:56,200 Speaker 1: so is the line of her jaw. She says the 66 00:03:56,240 --> 00:04:00,120 Speaker 1: pains in my chest might be from little growths called polypes. 67 00:04:00,680 --> 00:04:03,080 Speaker 1: She says that it isn't uncommon for kids born in 68 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:06,080 Speaker 1: the year of the worst chemical spills like me, when 69 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:09,640 Speaker 1: the poison gases left the forests outside of Wawanosh dead 70 00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:14,600 Speaker 1: and leafless. Since it happened, she says, some of the 71 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:18,920 Speaker 1: biodegradable components of those chemicals have broken down and become harmless. 72 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:23,839 Speaker 1: Others circulate through the water cycle, coursing through rivers and 73 00:04:23,960 --> 00:04:28,320 Speaker 1: clouds of condensation in the stratosphere, gradually making their way 74 00:04:28,360 --> 00:04:32,239 Speaker 1: to the North and South Pole, concentrated by the cold there. 75 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,360 Speaker 1: She tells me, it's the same as what happens when 76 00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:37,760 Speaker 1: you leave a bottle of beer outside in the snow 77 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:40,159 Speaker 1: in the winter and forget it's there, and when you 78 00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:42,960 Speaker 1: go out to get it, all the pure alcohol has 79 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:46,760 Speaker 1: separated and risen to the top. She gives me analgesic 80 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:51,800 Speaker 1: pills and inhaler full of generic bronchodilator. Doctor Hansen has 81 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:54,880 Speaker 1: people inside the hospitals who give her things even though 82 00:04:54,880 --> 00:04:58,480 Speaker 1: they aren't supposed to. She sits beside me on the 83 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:01,799 Speaker 1: edge of the narrow cot and lays her dry, cracked 84 00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:05,120 Speaker 1: hand against my cheek. The pads of her fingers are 85 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:09,960 Speaker 1: hard and smooth, silvery white with scar tissue. I touch 86 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:13,240 Speaker 1: my own fingers sometimes and wonder how much it must 87 00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:17,640 Speaker 1: have hurt. Doctor Hansen's eyes are blue, their edges creased 88 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:20,800 Speaker 1: with fine lines. She tries to smile when she looks 89 00:05:20,839 --> 00:05:25,440 Speaker 1: at me, but instead her lips just pressed together. I'm 90 00:05:25,480 --> 00:05:28,040 Speaker 1: going to try to get you some better drugs, she says, 91 00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:32,520 Speaker 1: and she wraps her hand around mine and squeezes. Jean 92 00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:35,680 Speaker 1: Marc accosts me before I'm even back to the compound, 93 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:39,080 Speaker 1: walking up behind me on Paul's silent feet so that 94 00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:41,440 Speaker 1: I startle when he puts his hand on my shoulder. 95 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:44,640 Speaker 1: I was in the city today, he tells me, and 96 00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:48,080 Speaker 1: his smile is wolfish. The day is bright and cold, 97 00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,480 Speaker 1: and his breath makes clouds of steam in the air, 98 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:54,280 Speaker 1: his chest heaving like he's been running. His hair has 99 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:56,200 Speaker 1: come loose from where he keeps it tied at the 100 00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:58,800 Speaker 1: nape of his neck. The short piece is hanging down 101 00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:02,400 Speaker 1: in his face and greasy hanks. I always tell him 102 00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:05,200 Speaker 1: that next time one of the kids gets lce, he's 103 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:07,640 Speaker 1: going to have to shave his head like everybody else. 104 00:06:08,279 --> 00:06:11,479 Speaker 1: Teasing him with the woolen, shears, saying, I'll chop it 105 00:06:11,520 --> 00:06:14,480 Speaker 1: off while he's sleeping, like that story I read in 106 00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:16,479 Speaker 1: one of the bibles we found in a crate at 107 00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:19,800 Speaker 1: the dump site. We'll see, he tells me, like he 108 00:06:19,839 --> 00:06:23,600 Speaker 1: has any choice in it. I robbed a man, he grins, 109 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:26,600 Speaker 1: and I notice how he's hiding his hands behind his back. 110 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:30,000 Speaker 1: I try to lean around him to see what he's got, 111 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:32,359 Speaker 1: but he darts and turns away from me, taking another 112 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:37,120 Speaker 1: step backward. What is it something you'll want? He laughs, 113 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,080 Speaker 1: and he shows me a little package wrapped in brown 114 00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:42,479 Speaker 1: paper coffee. I try to grab it out of his hand, 115 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:44,560 Speaker 1: but he jumps out of my reach again and his 116 00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:48,359 Speaker 1: hands go behind his back. Share, I tell him, taking 117 00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:50,800 Speaker 1: another step forward, and he laughs and tells me that 118 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:55,880 Speaker 1: sharing is conditional on what. I ask, still advancing as 119 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:58,680 Speaker 1: he retreats, and he raises one of his eyebrows and 120 00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:03,640 Speaker 1: his face becomes smug. Does this condition apply to everybody 121 00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:06,120 Speaker 1: who wants some? I ask? And he shakes his head 122 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:10,120 Speaker 1: and says, no, just me. I try to tackle him 123 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:13,400 Speaker 1: around the waist, but he seems somehow heavier more solid 124 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:16,240 Speaker 1: than last time we fought, until it occurs to me 125 00:07:17,040 --> 00:07:20,280 Speaker 1: that it's just me who's gotten weaker. He tries to 126 00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:22,720 Speaker 1: pin my arms behind my back, but I get myself 127 00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:26,080 Speaker 1: free and run down the potholed road until he catches up. 128 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:28,840 Speaker 1: Once he would have pulled me to the ground, and 129 00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:31,880 Speaker 1: we would have rolled around, slinging dirt into each other's faces, 130 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,960 Speaker 1: laughing and choking on the dust until one of us 131 00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:38,760 Speaker 1: admitted reluctant to feet. But this time he lets his 132 00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:41,800 Speaker 1: hands fall from my shoulders and then puts them back 133 00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:47,120 Speaker 1: a gesture of consolation this time, rather than a challenge. Mina, 134 00:07:47,440 --> 00:07:49,400 Speaker 1: he says, And he puts the package in my hand 135 00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:52,880 Speaker 1: and closes my fingers around it. We're still standing close 136 00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:55,520 Speaker 1: to each other, and he smells like stale sweat and 137 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:58,920 Speaker 1: stale tobacco and unwashed hair laced with some other smell 138 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:04,400 Speaker 1: I don't recognize, alien city smell, chemical and sharp. We 139 00:08:04,480 --> 00:08:07,800 Speaker 1: walk down the road together. It's packed dirt, flanked with 140 00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:13,600 Speaker 1: ratty shrubs and Queen Anne's lace new green buds. You 141 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:17,280 Speaker 1: are with the doctor, Yes, I say, and I show 142 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:20,760 Speaker 1: him the painkillers and their little plastic bottle. He nods 143 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:24,440 Speaker 1: and doesn't say anything else. And do you know what 144 00:08:24,520 --> 00:08:28,800 Speaker 1: else besides painkillers in a little plastic bottle numbs the 145 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:33,319 Speaker 1: pain of the collapse of late capitalism, the sweet sweet 146 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:40,280 Speaker 1: deals that our advertisers are offering of these products and services, 147 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:56,800 Speaker 1: and Rebecca. When Jean Mark first showed up in Eleitheria, 148 00:08:57,200 --> 00:09:00,560 Speaker 1: he was all lean muscle and bruised colored eyes, a 149 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:04,439 Speaker 1: feral city thing. He had a kind of violent sadness 150 00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:09,040 Speaker 1: coming off of him, toxicity of constant fear. His face 151 00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:12,520 Speaker 1: looks softer now, even though he's older. From certain angles, 152 00:09:12,559 --> 00:09:14,320 Speaker 1: you can almost see what he would have looked like 153 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:17,080 Speaker 1: as a child, if a place like the city would 154 00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:21,480 Speaker 1: even allow a childhood or someone like him. We walk 155 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:24,640 Speaker 1: all the way to the place where illutharious compound used 156 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:27,920 Speaker 1: to be, the wrecked carcass of the old prison, with 157 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:30,600 Speaker 1: its big, ragged hole opening into what used to be 158 00:09:30,679 --> 00:09:34,080 Speaker 1: the north wing, all jagged with twisted pieces of rebar 159 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:38,440 Speaker 1: and steel, eyebeams sticking out everywhere like teeth in a mean, 160 00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:42,680 Speaker 1: hungry mouth. I came to the prison alone last week. 161 00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:46,040 Speaker 1: The day. It rained all morning, and the ruins smelled 162 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:50,000 Speaker 1: like wet concrete and wet ashes. I'm not sure what 163 00:09:50,080 --> 00:09:53,280 Speaker 1: I was doing there. I found a dead sparrow right 164 00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:56,880 Speaker 1: in the bomb blast, steel toothed mouth, lying with its 165 00:09:56,880 --> 00:10:00,640 Speaker 1: wings spread on the ground, its neck lull limp in 166 00:10:00,679 --> 00:10:04,079 Speaker 1: my cupped hands, and I thought to myself, there is 167 00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:08,960 Speaker 1: softness in everything. There is softness in the sunless world 168 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:12,199 Speaker 1: inside the old prison, in the smell of old, old 169 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:14,800 Speaker 1: ashes that comes back up out of the ground after 170 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:18,120 Speaker 1: it rains. Some of those ashes are the burnt up 171 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:21,120 Speaker 1: bones of the men and women and little kids who 172 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:24,200 Speaker 1: were trapped inside after the bombs and back when the 173 00:10:24,240 --> 00:10:26,720 Speaker 1: compound was still at the ruins. Sometimes I would find 174 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:29,360 Speaker 1: little pieces of bone in the buckets of ash I 175 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:32,800 Speaker 1: brought out for the gardens. Whenever that happened, I would 176 00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:34,840 Speaker 1: keep them in my pocket and bring them up to 177 00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:37,840 Speaker 1: the third hill after I was done, the highest one, 178 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:40,600 Speaker 1: where you can see into the junkyard and what used 179 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:44,480 Speaker 1: to be the highway. I would dig little pits deep 180 00:10:44,559 --> 00:10:47,520 Speaker 1: enough that the rain wouldn't wash them up, and say 181 00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:50,000 Speaker 1: a few words to the bone pieces as I scraped 182 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:54,240 Speaker 1: the dirt back over them and packed it down. Sometimes 183 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:56,560 Speaker 1: I would pull out some of my hair or make 184 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:59,360 Speaker 1: little cuts on my fingers and squeeze drops of blood 185 00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:02,720 Speaker 1: out so they would know I hadn't forgotten why they died, 186 00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:05,439 Speaker 1: why the prison and all the places around it were 187 00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:07,840 Speaker 1: empty for us to build our home in the first place. 188 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,280 Speaker 1: For days, I would feel the little pin pricks on 189 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:14,520 Speaker 1: my hands where I'd cut myself whenever I was washing 190 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:18,320 Speaker 1: the dishes, or cutting potatoes or chopping wood. The pain 191 00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:21,600 Speaker 1: would remind me of the bone pieces and the fire 192 00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:25,079 Speaker 1: I was too young to remember, and there was softness 193 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:30,360 Speaker 1: in that as well. Jean Mark and I stand beside 194 00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:33,600 Speaker 1: each other in the prison's jagged mouth, our hands not 195 00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:37,760 Speaker 1: quite touching. Looking into the dark, my eyes scanned the 196 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:41,079 Speaker 1: ground for the sparrow's little body, but it's gone, now, 197 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:45,360 Speaker 1: carried off by some animal. The flat field behind us 198 00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:49,040 Speaker 1: is still surrounded by a high, high fence, although there 199 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,480 Speaker 1: have been torn up bits for as long as I remember. 200 00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:55,000 Speaker 1: Some of the older people, like Sarah and James and 201 00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:57,680 Speaker 1: Yehudah tell me that it was a yard where they 202 00:11:57,679 --> 00:12:01,040 Speaker 1: would let the prisoners exercise, way back when, when the 203 00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:05,680 Speaker 1: place was a normal prison. After everything changed, they never 204 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:09,200 Speaker 1: let anybody outside. There are people in the city who 205 00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:12,360 Speaker 1: want to help us, Jean Mark says, still looking into 206 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:15,760 Speaker 1: the dark. My face tenses up when he says it, 207 00:12:16,120 --> 00:12:21,160 Speaker 1: and he notices they're not rats, not this time. I 208 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:24,960 Speaker 1: don't say anything. My hand leaves my side and traverses 209 00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:28,600 Speaker 1: the space between us, meaning to touch him, although it 210 00:12:28,679 --> 00:12:32,920 Speaker 1: stops short of contact and falls again, numb and heavy. 211 00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:37,360 Speaker 1: At the compound, there's an old mirror nailed to the 212 00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:39,240 Speaker 1: door of the building that used to be a barn, 213 00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:42,240 Speaker 1: and I catch my own eyes reflected in it as 214 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:46,160 Speaker 1: I'm closing the door behind us. I look worse. I 215 00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:50,280 Speaker 1: look the same. Everyone can tell. No one can tell. 216 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:56,200 Speaker 1: I'm imagining it. I'm imagining everything. Jean Mark wrote a 217 00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:59,040 Speaker 1: sign that says you're ugly and nailed it above the 218 00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:02,720 Speaker 1: mirror because he was of people looking at themselves. I 219 00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:05,199 Speaker 1: see it and smile as I latch the door's back 220 00:13:05,280 --> 00:13:08,760 Speaker 1: shut again. The children assail us before we've taken our 221 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:11,960 Speaker 1: boots off, and my smile widens at the small hand 222 00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:16,240 Speaker 1: searching my pockets, the laughing voices. I close my hand 223 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:19,840 Speaker 1: around my bottle of pain killers, and Flora's tiny hot 224 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:22,960 Speaker 1: fingers try to pry it open again, wanting to know 225 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:27,400 Speaker 1: what I have. After the sun goes down, everyone goes outside, 226 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:30,080 Speaker 1: where scrap wood from the dump site is already piled 227 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,200 Speaker 1: for the fire. It will be summer soon and there 228 00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:36,240 Speaker 1: will be music and fire and laughing voices every night. 229 00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:39,800 Speaker 1: I leave without speaking and go up to the top 230 00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:42,520 Speaker 1: floor of the third building, where I sleep in a 231 00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:44,800 Speaker 1: room which is really just one of the hall closets 232 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:46,719 Speaker 1: from back when the compound was a farm with a 233 00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:51,360 Speaker 1: house made for three or four people, not thirty. In 234 00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:55,360 Speaker 1: the dark, I think about doctor Hanson, her soft, crackly 235 00:13:55,480 --> 00:13:58,680 Speaker 1: voice telling me I should be more careful, her scarred 236 00:13:58,760 --> 00:14:01,960 Speaker 1: up fingertips brushing the hair out of my face, pinning 237 00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:05,040 Speaker 1: it behind my ears. I dream she lets me lay 238 00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:07,480 Speaker 1: my head on her stomach while she combs my hair. 239 00:14:08,160 --> 00:14:12,959 Speaker 1: My mind drifts, pacified by the fantasy. When I open 240 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:16,360 Speaker 1: my eyes, she is not her anymore. She is dead, 241 00:14:16,720 --> 00:14:19,400 Speaker 1: like the people on the propaganda leaflets that Jean Marc 242 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:23,520 Speaker 1: showed me, lurid photos showing the atrocities of the regime. 243 00:14:24,360 --> 00:14:28,040 Speaker 1: Bloated faces, a woman's pregnant belly slid open like it's 244 00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:31,560 Speaker 1: been unzipped. Her intestines are laid in a slick membrane 245 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:34,560 Speaker 1: knot on her chest, and you can see the baby inside, 246 00:14:34,680 --> 00:14:37,520 Speaker 1: no longer protected by the cradle of her pelvic bones, 247 00:14:38,080 --> 00:14:43,320 Speaker 1: layers of dissected tissue, pinned and rooshed like paper, roses, flesh, petals, 248 00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:48,800 Speaker 1: curved bone. I startle awake when Jean Mark kicks open 249 00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 1: the door. He shuts it again as quietly as his 250 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:54,280 Speaker 1: panic will allow, and darts into the corner beside where 251 00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:58,680 Speaker 1: I'm lying. Sh he says, and I can hear things 252 00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:02,840 Speaker 1: banging downstairs, angry words being exchanged. There's an edge of 253 00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,400 Speaker 1: laughter in his voice, and I know he's done something 254 00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:07,800 Speaker 1: really stupid, but part of him is proud of it. 255 00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:11,600 Speaker 1: The stairs creak with heavy footsteps, but I can tell 256 00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:14,760 Speaker 1: from the sound of the hard soul's shoes that it's Mason. 257 00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:19,640 Speaker 1: He's infuriated this time. He's got a knife, says Jean Mark, 258 00:15:19,720 --> 00:15:22,000 Speaker 1: close to my ear. I can tell by the way 259 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:27,640 Speaker 1: he's walking, he's walking with confidence. The footsteps thud past us. 260 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:32,440 Speaker 1: Mason has been drinking. He yells Jean Mark's name twice, 261 00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:36,440 Speaker 1: and then there's just silence, then a noise of frustration, 262 00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:39,160 Speaker 1: and he hurls something solid and heavy against the wall 263 00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:44,120 Speaker 1: near where we're hiding. Jean Mark's hand wraps around mine 264 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:47,680 Speaker 1: in the darkness, But once Mason goes back downstairs again, 265 00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:50,160 Speaker 1: he breaks out into laughter. He's been holding back the 266 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:54,480 Speaker 1: whole time. His wine smelling lips press against my cheek, 267 00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:57,920 Speaker 1: and then he disappears again, probably leaving through one of 268 00:15:57,920 --> 00:16:02,320 Speaker 1: the upstairs windows that leads on to the roofof. In 269 00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:06,560 Speaker 1: the morning, Yehudah looks exhausted, awake before everyone else, peeling 270 00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:09,960 Speaker 1: a mound of potatoes into one of the big plastic washtubs. 271 00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:13,000 Speaker 1: A pile of broken tinder that used to be one 272 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:15,920 Speaker 1: of the chairs lies gathered into a neat pile by 273 00:16:15,920 --> 00:16:19,360 Speaker 1: the wood stove. He smiles when he sees me, and 274 00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:21,600 Speaker 1: I sit down beside him and take the knife off 275 00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:24,480 Speaker 1: my belt and start peeling, thinking that's the best way 276 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:27,440 Speaker 1: I can tell him I'm sorry, not for anything I've 277 00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:30,200 Speaker 1: done wrong, just for the way things are in general. 278 00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:36,320 Speaker 1: He doesn't say anything, but I know he understands. Sometimes 279 00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:39,600 Speaker 1: I think Yhudah is my father. Everyone takes care of 280 00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:43,400 Speaker 1: the kids together at Ilithuria, feeds them and sews their clothes, 281 00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:45,840 Speaker 1: and teaches them how to mix bread. Dough and plant 282 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:49,800 Speaker 1: tomato seedlings and feed the chickens. But sometimes Hudah looks 283 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,760 Speaker 1: at me in a special way, kind of sad and searching, 284 00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:55,040 Speaker 1: And I think he's trying to find pieces of my 285 00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:59,720 Speaker 1: mother in my face. Did you see the helicopter yesterday? 286 00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:05,520 Speaker 1: Eventually and fear jabs its sharp beak into my chest, No, 287 00:17:05,880 --> 00:17:07,800 Speaker 1: I say, And I know what he's thinking, That we 288 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,159 Speaker 1: that we have to leave soon, that we have to 289 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:13,120 Speaker 1: go north to where there's still places to hide, dragged 290 00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:18,199 Speaker 1: mountains where helicopters can't land, brooms of dried nettles, and 291 00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:22,720 Speaker 1: motherwarts sway from the ceiling rafters, newly risen suns spilling 292 00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:24,960 Speaker 1: in through the crack, and the door that's been open 293 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:29,439 Speaker 1: to let the spring air in home the illusion of permanence. 294 00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:33,399 Speaker 1: James comes down the stairs with two of the kids, sad, 295 00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:37,480 Speaker 1: dark eyed, Mattias asleep in his arms, while Aretha straggles 296 00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:41,840 Speaker 1: behind them, thin and rangy, her small face serious. He 297 00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:45,400 Speaker 1: eases himself onto the bench besides Yehudah, and they sit 298 00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:48,919 Speaker 1: with their knees touching. Ehuda puts his arms around James 299 00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,639 Speaker 1: and Mattias, and they stay like that for a while, 300 00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:54,959 Speaker 1: with their eyes closed makes me sad for some reason, 301 00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:58,440 Speaker 1: and I try not to look. Mina, what do you 302 00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:01,000 Speaker 1: think we can do for Jean Mark? James asks me. 303 00:18:02,119 --> 00:18:04,040 Speaker 1: I look at the potato I'm peeling and shrug my 304 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:08,280 Speaker 1: shoulders at him. Four don't you mean a bout? They 305 00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:12,640 Speaker 1: both laugh, although they try not to. He's not here 306 00:18:12,720 --> 00:18:16,040 Speaker 1: and nobody knows where he's gone. Please, Mina, you seem 307 00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:19,479 Speaker 1: to know him better than anyone else. Does. I do 308 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:21,760 Speaker 1: know Jean Mark better than anyone else. I want to 309 00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:24,720 Speaker 1: tell him, and that's the reason I really don't care 310 00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:28,720 Speaker 1: what happens to him. He'll be back, I tell them instead. 311 00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:31,120 Speaker 1: He doesn't know how to take care of himself out 312 00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:34,600 Speaker 1: here where there aren't any rich people to rob. Maretha 313 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:37,359 Speaker 1: pulls at my sleeve and frowns. She wants us to 314 00:18:37,359 --> 00:18:41,800 Speaker 1: stop talking about it. I'm sorry, Ritha. We won't fight, 315 00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:44,560 Speaker 1: I say, and I wrap my arm around her narrow 316 00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:48,600 Speaker 1: shoulders and pull her onto the bench beside me. And 317 00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:50,639 Speaker 1: do you know what else is always beside you on 318 00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:54,480 Speaker 1: the bench, just right there, ready to put a supportive 319 00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:59,120 Speaker 1: arm around your shoulders like an old friend. That's right, 320 00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:17,240 Speaker 1: the ads, and we're back. I know, I shouldn't do it, 321 00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:20,639 Speaker 1: But I go to doctor Hanson anyway after the sun's 322 00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:22,920 Speaker 1: gone down and my work for the day is done. 323 00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:26,040 Speaker 1: The way there is mostly through the forest, so I 324 00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:29,200 Speaker 1: tell myself the helicopters wouldn't be able to see me anyhow. 325 00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:32,000 Speaker 1: If they knew how to see into the forest, they 326 00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,919 Speaker 1: wouldn't have to drop the bombs filled with poison gas 327 00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:39,200 Speaker 1: that strips every tree to its bare white skeleton. If 328 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,680 Speaker 1: they knew how to see into the forest, they wouldn't 329 00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:44,160 Speaker 1: have to chop it all down and burn the stumps. 330 00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:47,920 Speaker 1: The way there is long, but I push my aching body. 331 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:51,280 Speaker 1: When I get to her house, there isn't any light, 332 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:54,840 Speaker 1: but she's lying awake inside with her eyes open, just 333 00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:58,320 Speaker 1: looking out into the dark. You have to leave soon, 334 00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:01,399 Speaker 1: she says. When I crawl into bed beside her, I 335 00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:05,200 Speaker 1: have to leave two. She puts her arm around my shoulders, 336 00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:06,919 Speaker 1: and I tell her the same thing I've told her 337 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:09,920 Speaker 1: so many times, that I love her, that I'm in 338 00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,960 Speaker 1: love with her, that I want to kiss her on 339 00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,280 Speaker 1: her mouth and on the scarred over tips of each 340 00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:17,639 Speaker 1: of her fingers, that I wish, more than anything I 341 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:20,360 Speaker 1: could take the pain out of her memories, and out 342 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:24,760 Speaker 1: of her tired, broken body. I love you as well, Mina, 343 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:28,080 Speaker 1: she says, and kisses the side of my head. I 344 00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:30,040 Speaker 1: know she doesn't mean it the way that I mean it, 345 00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:33,120 Speaker 1: and I tell myself that's almost better. That's the way 346 00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:37,399 Speaker 1: it should be between us. We don't say anything for 347 00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:39,320 Speaker 1: a while, and I wonder for a moment if she's 348 00:20:39,359 --> 00:20:42,679 Speaker 1: gone to sleep. I curl myself around her thin body 349 00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:46,120 Speaker 1: and lay my head on her shoulder. In my pocket, 350 00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:48,640 Speaker 1: I can feel the packet of coffee that Jean Mark 351 00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:52,600 Speaker 1: gave me. A heavy wind shakes the house, making its 352 00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:55,639 Speaker 1: wooden rafters sigh, and it's then that I know I 353 00:20:55,640 --> 00:20:58,919 Speaker 1: will never see Jean Mark again. He has been killed 354 00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,800 Speaker 1: or else crossed some other boundary just as unbroachable as death, 355 00:21:03,320 --> 00:21:05,560 Speaker 1: lost again in the bowels of the city where he 356 00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:09,199 Speaker 1: came from. Do you think any of the forests have 357 00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:13,160 Speaker 1: grown back, I ask her, the forests all around wawanosh. 358 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:16,960 Speaker 1: It won't ever be like it was before, she says 359 00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,600 Speaker 1: after a minute, her voice ruffling my hair as it 360 00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:23,800 Speaker 1: drifts into sleep. But some things are hardy and don't die. 361 00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:27,840 Speaker 1: Like the rest clover, I think, I think the clover 362 00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:33,240 Speaker 1: still grows wild and wawanosh, the clover still grows wild. 363 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:36,600 Speaker 1: I repeat to myself, and I close my eyes, listening 364 00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:39,399 Speaker 1: to the sound of our breath and the rattling in 365 00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:42,600 Speaker 1: my chest, and the noises of the first birds waking 366 00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:45,920 Speaker 1: up outside as the gray morning light weeps in through 367 00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:49,160 Speaker 1: the windows, through all the small spaces where the tape 368 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:56,600 Speaker 1: has peeled away. The end and yeah, I don't know, 369 00:21:56,680 --> 00:22:00,000 Speaker 1: welcome back. What a lush, delectable story. Thank you, Kelly. 370 00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:03,560 Speaker 1: And I can just feel the fog through the prose. 371 00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:08,439 Speaker 1: Kelly just is a real serious way with words. Hazel, 372 00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:11,280 Speaker 1: who helps us pick the stories, has this to say 373 00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:15,199 Speaker 1: about this story quote, I am just so taken with 374 00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:18,719 Speaker 1: the imagery and the emotions that Kelly evokes. This story 375 00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:21,240 Speaker 1: makes me feel very similarly to when I read Parable 376 00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:24,280 Speaker 1: the Sewer for the first time, which listener if you 377 00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:27,520 Speaker 1: haven't read yet, is a must read, being presented with 378 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:32,240 Speaker 1: different coping strategies for catastrophe and impending doom, Mina seeking out, 379 00:22:32,280 --> 00:22:37,000 Speaker 1: doomed romance, Jean Mark starting shit, Yehudah losing himself in 380 00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:40,080 Speaker 1: work is a classic setup for this kind of story, 381 00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:43,320 Speaker 1: but the texture and vibrance and subtlety that Kelly brings 382 00:22:43,320 --> 00:22:45,879 Speaker 1: this true craft, and she writes with this prose that 383 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,320 Speaker 1: you can really chew on and keep finding depth, turning 384 00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:51,000 Speaker 1: over a new layer. At the beginning we called out 385 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:53,080 Speaker 1: that this piece wasn't going to have too much plot, 386 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:56,199 Speaker 1: and it doesn't, but it frankly doesn't need one. Plot 387 00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:59,160 Speaker 1: is often the engine driving a story, but for Clover, 388 00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:03,040 Speaker 1: the images dripping in emotional resonance are so strong that 389 00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:06,040 Speaker 1: they power the story all on their own. The final 390 00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:08,320 Speaker 1: image of looking at the sunlight coming in through the 391 00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:10,679 Speaker 1: holes in the window where the tape is peeling away, 392 00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:15,000 Speaker 1: sums up so perfectly the tensions of this story. Eleithuria, 393 00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:18,520 Speaker 1: the utopian community, which is also the Greek word for freedom, 394 00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:21,359 Speaker 1: is the sunlight coming in through the holes, carving out 395 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,800 Speaker 1: autonomy outside where the state can project its power, and 396 00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:28,000 Speaker 1: Illthuria is also the tape trying to keep everyone together 397 00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:32,080 Speaker 1: to survive collectively. This is the endless tension of finding autonomy. 398 00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:34,520 Speaker 1: But beyond that, what does it even mean to be 399 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:36,920 Speaker 1: free if you know that your world will be ending 400 00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:40,520 Speaker 1: slash ended by force by the empire? What does freedom 401 00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:45,199 Speaker 1: mean to a doomed revolutionary? That's what Hazel has to 402 00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:48,040 Speaker 1: say about it, and I agree with that. And one 403 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:50,080 Speaker 1: of the things that really struck me about this story. 404 00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:53,560 Speaker 1: Usually if you have your little community called freedom at 405 00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:57,439 Speaker 1: the edge of an empire and its dystopian and you 406 00:23:57,440 --> 00:23:59,240 Speaker 1: can't quite tell the age of the characters, but you 407 00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:02,119 Speaker 1: get the impression they're like older teens. Maybe you know, 408 00:24:03,720 --> 00:24:08,840 Speaker 1: you're expecting a certain kind of why a niceness to 409 00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:12,159 Speaker 1: that community. If people disagree with each other, it's like 410 00:24:13,680 --> 00:24:20,320 Speaker 1: goofy or bullying, you know. Like but in this story, 411 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:24,000 Speaker 1: you have a drunken bad kid who's made someone so 412 00:24:24,119 --> 00:24:26,400 Speaker 1: mad that he's stalking around the house with a knife. 413 00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:31,120 Speaker 1: You know, there's like a realness, a rawness to this 414 00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:35,359 Speaker 1: utopian community that I'm really impressed with. And it really 415 00:24:35,359 --> 00:24:41,160 Speaker 1: shows that Kelly has experienced the less gentle sides of 416 00:24:41,240 --> 00:24:45,200 Speaker 1: life and society at various points in her life, and 417 00:24:45,240 --> 00:24:48,399 Speaker 1: it really comes across And I really like that paired 418 00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:55,240 Speaker 1: with this like you know, cool anarchyish community outside of society, 419 00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:58,439 Speaker 1: having it be like nahshit's like rough and real, but 420 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:02,360 Speaker 1: they're also like care about the kids and take care 421 00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:06,120 Speaker 1: of each other and all that shit. I would read 422 00:25:06,119 --> 00:25:09,920 Speaker 1: a whole novel just said in this, but I agree 423 00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:14,920 Speaker 1: that it works like this. It works as this vignette 424 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:16,879 Speaker 1: with a lot of things that it leaves us to 425 00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:20,200 Speaker 1: think about. It just it asks more questions than it answers. 426 00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:24,040 Speaker 1: And while I both appreciate that, I'm also like I 427 00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:29,119 Speaker 1: could read more anyway. Kelly's bio Kelly Rose Flugback is 428 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:32,840 Speaker 1: a writer, editor, and weightlifting coach living in Toronto. They 429 00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:38,200 Speaker 1: recently edited the anthology Uprising, which is up colon Rising, 430 00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,960 Speaker 1: and have otherwise been busy opening an accessible queer gym space, 431 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:47,560 Speaker 1: which you can find at Spectrum Collective dot c. You 432 00:25:47,600 --> 00:25:51,920 Speaker 1: can also follow her at Kelly Rose Creates and at 433 00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:57,480 Speaker 1: Less Pain, Underscore, More Gains. Yeah, And I'm Margaret Kiljoy 434 00:25:57,520 --> 00:25:59,560 Speaker 1: and you can find me on Instagram and Blue Sky 435 00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:03,320 Speaker 1: and Hazel helps with researching the scripts and Eva does 436 00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:06,560 Speaker 1: the audio editing. And I hope you too get to 437 00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:09,480 Speaker 1: chop amountain of potatoes this week and that it's cathartic 438 00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:13,280 Speaker 1: for you as well. Until next week, See you soon, 439 00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:19,240 Speaker 1: Fuck ice bye everyone. It could happen here as a 440 00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:22,160 Speaker 1: production of cool Zone Media. For more podcasts from cool 441 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:25,280 Speaker 1: Zone Media, visit our website Coolzonemedia dot com or check 442 00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:28,159 Speaker 1: us out on the iHeartRadio app Apple podcasts, or wherever 443 00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:30,920 Speaker 1: you listen to podcasts, you can find sources where it 444 00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:35,160 Speaker 1: could happen. Here, updated monthly at coolzonmedia dot com slash sources. 445 00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:36,120 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening.