WEBVTT - The Fifth Hour: Not So Lucky Charms 0:00:00.840 --> 0:00:01.600 Kubbooms. 0:00:02.400 --> 0:00:05.520 If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes 0:00:05.559 --> 0:00:09.280 a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants 0:00:09.320 --> 0:00:12.600 of the old Republic, a sol fashion of fairness. He 0:00:12.720 --> 0:00:15.640 treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the 0:00:15.760 --> 0:00:17.600 rich pill poppers in the penthouse. 0:00:18.200 --> 0:00:18.520 Wow. 0:00:18.720 --> 0:00:22.440 The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break free for something special. 0:00:22.800 --> 0:00:29.560 The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now. 0:00:29.120 --> 0:00:32.640 In the air everywhere. 0:00:32.880 --> 0:00:36.800 The Fifth Hour with Me, Ben Mahler and Danny g 0:00:37.120 --> 0:00:43.840 Radio America America. I know it's Independence Day today. We 0:00:43.880 --> 0:00:48.120 are recording this early in the am hours. Here you 0:00:48.200 --> 0:00:50.560 listen when you want to listen this fourth of July 0:00:50.680 --> 0:00:57.520 weekend as we celebrate the birthday of America by doing 0:00:57.840 --> 0:01:02.760 a very American thing, a podcast. And here we are 0:01:03.360 --> 0:01:08.880 and a super special edition of the podcast, which we're 0:01:08.920 --> 0:01:12.240 calling I think this is appropriate because it's Independence Day. 0:01:12.680 --> 0:01:18.160 Irish eyes are evil. Irish eyes are evil. So if 0:01:18.200 --> 0:01:22.640 you've read the podcast description, you probably know already what 0:01:22.680 --> 0:01:23.160 this is about. 0:01:23.200 --> 0:01:24.160 It's a bit of a cheat code. 0:01:24.200 --> 0:01:28.320 This podcast for the one percent of the one percent 0:01:28.360 --> 0:01:32.120 who listened to the overnight show and are fans of 0:01:32.480 --> 0:01:35.679 audio and that would be you. It's like members only here. 0:01:35.680 --> 0:01:40.120 It's a special cult that listens to this fifth hour podcast, 0:01:40.200 --> 0:01:44.280 especially on a holiday weekend like this. So if you 0:01:44.440 --> 0:01:49.480 did not, for some reason scan the description of the pod, 0:01:49.640 --> 0:01:54.600 maybe you missed it. The Malar Militia. Let's go back 0:01:54.680 --> 0:01:57.240 in the hot tub time machine to earlier this week. 0:01:57.720 --> 0:02:00.800 It is the story that everyone is to talking about 0:02:00.880 --> 0:02:04.200 that is a fan of the show. How does one 0:02:04.240 --> 0:02:10.240 handle some unexpected lucky charms? If you will, so my 0:02:10.360 --> 0:02:14.359 thoughts on the incident that happened. I've got soap mascot 0:02:14.720 --> 0:02:20.440 Clint Eastwood, and employee handbook, and we are going to 0:02:20.520 --> 0:02:23.760 combine all of these things together and make soda bread 0:02:24.360 --> 0:02:28.519 and shepherd's pie something you should not eat on Independence 0:02:28.600 --> 0:02:31.480 Day weekend. And if you're in Ireland, it's just another day. 0:02:32.160 --> 0:02:38.400 So first of all, picture if you will. It's high noon, daytime, 0:02:39.120 --> 0:02:45.240 classic sunny day in LA It's always sunny, not in Philadelphia. 0:02:45.760 --> 0:02:50.320 In Los Angeles, normal human beings are roaming earth, not 0:02:50.600 --> 0:02:55.720 us night shift vampires. These are daytime people. And now 0:02:55.960 --> 0:03:01.000 entering the scene is our radio power, the one and 0:03:01.080 --> 0:03:03.880 only Mike the Leprechaun. 0:03:05.560 --> 0:03:07.440 You know the guy, right, He's from Boston. 0:03:07.840 --> 0:03:12.120 He sounds like he's gargling Lucky charms, yeah, that guy 0:03:12.880 --> 0:03:16.840 while yelling about the Celtics, and so he decides to 0:03:16.880 --> 0:03:22.560 show up to the Fox Sports radio studios in Los Angeles. 0:03:23.320 --> 0:03:29.000 Now keep in mind that this is roughly ten hours 0:03:29.200 --> 0:03:37.800 early for the big in studio experience and appearance. Ten hours. 0:03:38.800 --> 0:03:44.320 He's got more enthusiasm than a bright eyed, bushy tailed 0:03:44.440 --> 0:03:48.480 rookie at the NFL Combine, And of course he also 0:03:48.480 --> 0:03:51.480 has less sense than a Boston Red Sox fan betting 0:03:51.560 --> 0:03:54.240 on this team to win the World Series in twenty 0:03:54.280 --> 0:03:56.320 twenty five. But for those of you in the back 0:03:56.400 --> 0:04:02.400 of the room who think somehow that we live in 0:04:02.440 --> 0:04:07.160 the magic radio box, I promise you, I promise you 0:04:08.200 --> 0:04:09.040 that is not true. 0:04:09.160 --> 0:04:15.440 Spoiler alert, we don't. I am not here during the day. 0:04:15.480 --> 0:04:17.600 Now. I did do some fill in radio. We'll talk 0:04:17.640 --> 0:04:19.400 about that as we get through the weekend. And so 0:04:19.520 --> 0:04:22.760 that was rare and appropriate, rare and appropriate. I got 0:04:22.760 --> 0:04:24.919 the call out of the bullpen to do some daytime radio. 0:04:25.720 --> 0:04:31.520 But typically I am sleeping in my coffin, if you will. 0:04:31.800 --> 0:04:33.719 I don't sleep long, but I try to get a 0:04:33.760 --> 0:04:37.279 snooze in during the day and I'm dreaming of Dodger 0:04:37.360 --> 0:04:41.160 World Series wins and Rams, Super Bowls and Clipper Championships, 0:04:41.160 --> 0:04:44.160 all the things that happen on a regular basis. So 0:04:44.960 --> 0:04:49.280 I start making some calls. I sent some texts out, 0:04:50.400 --> 0:04:53.960 and here's what I've gotten from my boots on the ground. Apparently, 0:04:54.040 --> 0:05:02.120 Mike the Leprechaun attempted to waltz in to the station midday, wearing, 0:05:02.160 --> 0:05:05.799 from what I'm told, a green outfit that screams I 0:05:05.880 --> 0:05:09.640 lost a bet with a Saint Patrick's Day parade. I 0:05:09.720 --> 0:05:13.120 somehow lost the bet, and here I am so in 0:05:13.600 --> 0:05:17.479 my head that cartoon bubble over my head. I'm sure 0:05:17.480 --> 0:05:20.560 Mallard prop guy will probably make some AI thing out 0:05:20.560 --> 0:05:24.000 of this, But in my head, Mike the Leprechaun's got 0:05:24.040 --> 0:05:28.640 a shamrock shirt on, possibly one of those fake beards, 0:05:29.760 --> 0:05:33.159 and he's likely carrying a pot of gold replica, not 0:05:33.200 --> 0:05:34.960 a real pot of gold, but a pot of gold 0:05:34.960 --> 0:05:38.159 replica he bought at Party City before they went out 0:05:38.160 --> 0:05:43.920 of business, and he's jingling louder than a slot machine 0:05:44.600 --> 0:05:47.840 in Vegas paying out. Of course, they don't actually give 0:05:47.839 --> 0:05:49.600 the coins anymore, but if they did, you know that 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:53.000 sound they make where you want a jackpot for Some 0:05:53.080 --> 0:05:54.520 of this is just in my head. 0:05:54.760 --> 0:05:57.920 So what happens next? So I'll tell you what happens next. 0:05:58.200 --> 0:06:04.039 The daytime crew, those poor coffee addicted souls who were 0:06:04.080 --> 0:06:09.200 stuck in stiff daytime radio, they thought they were being invaded. 0:06:09.240 --> 0:06:11.520 I'm convinced the people that worked during the day at 0:06:11.560 --> 0:06:15.680 the company thought they were being invaded by a deranged 0:06:15.880 --> 0:06:20.839 soap mascot who was going to throw Irish spring, bars 0:06:20.880 --> 0:06:24.800 of Irish spring like hand grenades at them, and it 0:06:24.839 --> 0:06:29.599 would explode and they'd be covered in Irish spring. Now 0:06:29.640 --> 0:06:33.240 turning the page two. So this of course triggered a 0:06:33.839 --> 0:06:40.479 wild chain reaction. Of course it did. Now keep in mind, 0:06:40.560 --> 0:06:45.239 I'm sleeping while this is going on. Well, some of management, 0:06:45.360 --> 0:06:47.479 I want to be clear, not all of management. Some 0:06:47.520 --> 0:06:50.360 of management went deaf con one. They didn't reach out 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:52.360 to me and asked me what happened or what I 0:06:52.440 --> 0:06:56.360 knew about the situation. They made some assumptions. They made 0:06:56.360 --> 0:06:59.320 some assumptions without talking to me. So I'm told there 0:06:59.360 --> 0:07:03.400 was an email Shane that was bouncing around and might 0:07:03.440 --> 0:07:08.000 as well have had the subject line urgent unidentified leprechaun 0:07:08.240 --> 0:07:09.640 in the lobby. 0:07:10.280 --> 0:07:11.560 Of course limited joking. 0:07:12.480 --> 0:07:14.280 Now, from what I've heard, and a lot of this 0:07:14.360 --> 0:07:17.280 is second hand, and much of what you hear secondhand 0:07:17.320 --> 0:07:21.880 is embellished, some of the daytime shifters likely need a 0:07:22.080 --> 0:07:27.000 miniature horse, some kind of therapy animal from the Leprechaun 0:07:27.040 --> 0:07:30.200 paying a visit. Think of a remake of the Clint 0:07:30.200 --> 0:07:37.960 Eastwood movie Escape from Alcatraz Island, except this is a 0:07:38.000 --> 0:07:42.960 horror movie script written by a Celtic fan who just 0:07:43.080 --> 0:07:48.040 watched Jason Tatum go snap, crackle pop his achilles anyway 0:07:48.080 --> 0:07:51.880 in the playoffs. So Hr is probably freaking out because 0:07:51.920 --> 0:07:55.080 Mike's asking everyone, you know, if they've seen his magic 0:07:55.120 --> 0:07:57.680 Shealey for all I know, because he said, you know, 0:07:57.680 --> 0:07:59.960 he's a fun guy, he's a goofball, He's a character. 0:08:00.080 --> 0:08:02.600 We love characters, and Mike the Leprechaun as a character. 0:08:03.040 --> 0:08:06.120 Now I didn't know this until I met him. You know, 0:08:06.200 --> 0:08:10.120 Mike was probably offering the Midday Crew Leprechaun blessings and 0:08:11.160 --> 0:08:13.480 all that for a better ratings book. 0:08:13.840 --> 0:08:15.880 So we assume we don't know for sure. 0:08:15.920 --> 0:08:18.480 We assume Michael Leprecaun was trying to pitch a segment 0:08:18.560 --> 0:08:23.679 called Shamrock Shake Sports Talk right there, in the Smurf kitchen, 0:08:23.720 --> 0:08:26.160 the bright blue smurf kitchen at the hallowed Fox Sports 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:26.760 Radio building. 0:08:28.000 --> 0:08:30.360 Now, the cherry on top. 0:08:30.200 --> 0:08:34.920 Of this Irish stew of insanity is the text message 0:08:34.960 --> 0:08:37.400 I got from someone who will remain. 0:08:37.200 --> 0:08:38.360 Nameless in management. 0:08:39.120 --> 0:08:42.680 You know, the suits, the guys who think overnight radio 0:08:43.920 --> 0:08:46.800 it's all just fun and you know, just some frivolity 0:08:46.920 --> 0:08:48.720 and all that, and they don't take it that seriously. 0:08:48.920 --> 0:08:53.280 So the message is essentially dripping with the corporate speak, 0:08:53.920 --> 0:08:57.240 you know, typical rage and the vibe. 0:08:57.240 --> 0:08:59.520 I God, I was somewhat annoyed by this. 0:09:00.880 --> 0:09:03.640 Because it made it seem like I personally told Mike 0:09:03.679 --> 0:09:07.320 the Leprechaun to storm the castle, storm the tressel u 0:09:07.400 --> 0:09:08.760 Irish Leprechaun. 0:09:09.360 --> 0:09:12.240 The vibe was, hey, mallor control your callers. 0:09:13.200 --> 0:09:13.360 Now. 0:09:13.480 --> 0:09:16.440 No one asked me anything about They just like sent 0:09:16.440 --> 0:09:20.240 me back like essentially, control your callers. This is a 0:09:20.280 --> 0:09:25.520 professional operation, not some kind of odd renaissance fair. So yeah, 0:09:25.559 --> 0:09:28.640 I mean, you know, right, you know, like tell that 0:09:28.720 --> 0:09:32.240 to the guy who's been calling the show for a 0:09:32.240 --> 0:09:35.800 couple of years now, Mike the leprechan claiming essentially he's 0:09:35.800 --> 0:09:38.960 probably got a direct line to the sweet spirit, the 0:09:39.000 --> 0:09:43.360 ghost of Red Arbach. I don't doubt that he's probably 0:09:43.400 --> 0:09:49.120 got that. So story continues, and clearly, before I get 0:09:49.120 --> 0:09:53.080 going any further, Mike the Leprechaun clearly thinks time zones 0:09:53.160 --> 0:09:55.160 work like a mythical pot of gold. 0:09:55.440 --> 0:09:57.079 The fact that he would show up that early, so. 0:09:57.640 --> 0:10:00.560 Again he's got the daytime staff running for cup like 0:10:00.920 --> 0:10:04.680 in my head, like they're dodging, like TJ. Watt is 0:10:04.760 --> 0:10:09.000 decided he wanted to blitz the studio, and so now 0:10:09.120 --> 0:10:13.640 I'm the one. I'm the one getting the stinky from 0:10:14.200 --> 0:10:16.319 the you know, the management people like you know, and 0:10:16.400 --> 0:10:19.480 I'm like, no, what are you doing? I did not 0:10:20.800 --> 0:10:23.720 I did not lead anyone down this path. This is 0:10:23.800 --> 0:10:27.559 like blaming. If I'll use this, I used TJ. Watt 0:10:27.600 --> 0:10:31.040 as an example. This is like blaming Mike Tomlin for 0:10:31.160 --> 0:10:34.120 Aaron Rodgers getting a one year deal with the Seilers. 0:10:34.200 --> 0:10:38.120 Like listen, I've done a lot of crazy things. It's 0:10:38.160 --> 0:10:40.680 part of being a radio guy. I did not create 0:10:40.720 --> 0:10:44.480 the chaos. I was just being polite. Mike had been 0:10:44.520 --> 0:10:45.320 begging to come. 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:45.880 To the studio. 0:10:45.960 --> 0:10:47.720 He had reached out to me, and I gave him 0:10:47.720 --> 0:10:50.160 the date. We went back and forth on dates. I said, 0:10:50.160 --> 0:10:52.160 that's the date I'll be there. This is the time 0:10:52.320 --> 0:10:57.000 roughly we'll be there. And you know, I didn't create 0:10:57.040 --> 0:11:00.440 the cast. I'm just commenting on it. I'm doing the 0:11:00.559 --> 0:11:05.520 commentary on the chaos. So and again, a lot of 0:11:05.520 --> 0:11:10.200 this happened. I wasn't there. I was miles and miles away, 0:11:10.480 --> 0:11:14.240 bunkered at the Malor Mansion. And according to the building 0:11:14.320 --> 0:11:17.600 security guard, who I have no idea, like, I'm there 0:11:17.600 --> 0:11:20.160 at night, the security guards at night are barely there. 0:11:19.960 --> 0:11:24.319 They're usually on food runs or they're sleeping or playing 0:11:24.360 --> 0:11:27.679 on their phone. So, according to the security at the building, 0:11:28.080 --> 0:11:30.880 Mike the Leprechaun was about as charming as getting a 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:34.079 flat tire on the four to zero five freeway here 0:11:34.080 --> 0:11:37.520 in LA and rush hour like he apparently scared the 0:11:37.600 --> 0:11:41.040 daylights out of the security And I really don't know 0:11:41.120 --> 0:11:46.640 why when I met him, because we've had crazier, zanier, 0:11:46.920 --> 0:11:51.400 wacky people that have walked in and visited us on 0:11:51.520 --> 0:11:54.920 the show. And you know, listen, I love the people 0:11:54.960 --> 0:11:57.120 that are part of the show and the characters that 0:11:57.200 --> 0:12:00.840 make the show what it is, and some of you 0:12:01.840 --> 0:12:04.160 are out there. I've met some people on the spectrum. 0:12:04.160 --> 0:12:06.160 But you've all been very polite for the most part. 0:12:06.240 --> 0:12:10.839 You're just over the top and you're extroverts, and I'm 0:12:10.840 --> 0:12:14.240 an introvert, so I don't really understand that world. But 0:12:14.280 --> 0:12:17.440 I appreciate you for supporting what we do here, the 0:12:17.440 --> 0:12:20.480 product that we put out on a daily basis. And 0:12:21.160 --> 0:12:23.160 without you, we don't get to go into the factory. 0:12:23.679 --> 0:12:25.360 So the people during the day were all freaked out. 0:12:25.360 --> 0:12:29.760 Way bottom line here, bottom line. So HR is probably 0:12:29.840 --> 0:12:36.760 writing a new iHeartRadio employee handbook, chapter titled leprechan Protocol. 0:12:41.040 --> 0:12:42.480 And I want to. 0:12:42.679 --> 0:12:44.000 Circle back to what I had said earlier. 0:12:44.160 --> 0:12:47.160 Listen, I do love the enthusiasm, and I have said 0:12:47.200 --> 0:12:50.400 it for many, many years, and I will continue to 0:12:50.400 --> 0:12:57.160 say it. Radio just means a little more to people 0:12:57.200 --> 0:13:02.679 that listen at night. That is special. It's something again 0:13:02.720 --> 0:13:06.960 that we don't just toss to the side, and it's 0:13:07.000 --> 0:13:11.560 something that the daytime crew will never understand unless they've 0:13:11.600 --> 0:13:14.439 done overnights and done the nighttime shift. And now listen, 0:13:14.480 --> 0:13:17.319 if you work the daytime shift, you get paid a 0:13:17.360 --> 0:13:20.680 lot more money, They treat you pretty good, You get 0:13:20.679 --> 0:13:23.320 to go on trips and they you know, they'll send 0:13:23.320 --> 0:13:24.640 you to the Super Bowl and all that, so that 0:13:24.640 --> 0:13:28.360 those are all cool things and it's just a little 0:13:28.400 --> 0:13:34.200 bit different now. That said that said, for every man, 0:13:34.360 --> 0:13:38.000 woman and child, you should know that you cannot just 0:13:38.120 --> 0:13:42.720 storm the FSR studios like it's the Battle of Bunker Hill, 0:13:43.320 --> 0:13:44.360 like Mike the Leprechaun. 0:13:44.520 --> 0:13:47.320 It is a place of business. There are rules. 0:13:48.600 --> 0:13:50.600 I've told many of you that have come by, like 0:13:50.679 --> 0:13:52.360 normally you can come by and you. 0:13:52.280 --> 0:13:55.680 Can only stay for it the most an hour, that's it. 0:13:55.720 --> 0:13:58.559 And we've had everyone from Sean the hood Guy, Robbie 0:13:58.559 --> 0:14:03.239 the Mariner fan, We've had Sir for Todd the comedian 0:14:03.320 --> 0:14:07.480 that has come by, and of course Jays Scoop has 0:14:07.520 --> 0:14:11.920 been in many times the Great inca terror and for 0:14:11.960 --> 0:14:15.920 the most part, everyone followed the rules. This is the 0:14:15.960 --> 0:14:20.200 first time I can recall that something like this has happened. 0:14:20.240 --> 0:14:22.960 No one's ever shown up that early, all right, that's 0:14:23.000 --> 0:14:27.520 never happened. There was one incident, whether there were a 0:14:27.560 --> 0:14:29.680 couple of things that happen. We had robbed the ambassador 0:14:29.720 --> 0:14:33.360 of Bakersfield, God bless him, and he brought a buddy 0:14:33.360 --> 0:14:39.240 of his who, unfortunately we had to to send away 0:14:39.600 --> 0:14:42.280 shortly after they arrived. He was a little intoxicated and 0:14:42.400 --> 0:14:46.440 making some people in the building uncomfortable. So obviously you 0:14:46.440 --> 0:14:48.080 don't want to have someone in there that's making other 0:14:48.120 --> 0:14:51.440 people uncomfortable because that's become his issue. And so I'll 0:14:51.520 --> 0:14:53.760 kick you out right away. I'll kick you out right away. 0:14:53.760 --> 0:14:55.840 And there was also God, I forget it. I think 0:14:55.840 --> 0:14:58.200 it was like, I'm not gonna even give her name 0:14:58.240 --> 0:15:01.080 because I don't want trouble. I don't want to get sued. 0:15:01.120 --> 0:15:04.840 But there was a listener years ago, a female listener, 0:15:04.880 --> 0:15:08.560 who brought some red velvet cake and it was delicious, 0:15:09.960 --> 0:15:14.760 and she was really nervous, and I get it, you know, 0:15:15.000 --> 0:15:17.600 it's weird, you're in a new environment. And she was 0:15:17.840 --> 0:15:22.800 very nice, young lady, and as I remember she, she 0:15:22.920 --> 0:15:25.600 was really shy. And then she went into the bathroom, 0:15:25.720 --> 0:15:28.880 the powder room, and she came out of the powder 0:15:28.960 --> 0:15:32.960 room and was bouncing off the walls, just like the 0:15:33.560 --> 0:15:36.560 most interesting person in the world. And I don't know 0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:38.800 for sure that she did what I think she did 0:15:38.840 --> 0:15:42.120 in the bathroom, but I wouldn't be shocked if something 0:15:42.200 --> 0:15:44.400 was snorted, if you know what I mean. Because it 0:15:44.480 --> 0:15:52.200 was a total metamorphosis, like next level metamorphosis, and so 0:15:52.320 --> 0:15:55.200 something happened. I don't know what she was doing, but 0:15:56.240 --> 0:16:02.640 I'll never really probably know. But man, so the point 0:16:02.640 --> 0:16:07.160 we mentioned the bottom line here, So now management's likely 0:16:07.200 --> 0:16:10.360 got me on a very short leash and I wasn't 0:16:10.400 --> 0:16:13.320 exactly their favorite night owl to begin with. Right, So 0:16:14.120 --> 0:16:18.920 now I can add having having an email chain sent 0:16:18.960 --> 0:16:23.120 to the company employees and a angry text message. I 0:16:23.160 --> 0:16:26.480 can add that to years ago having my male band 0:16:27.200 --> 0:16:30.320 for not one, not two, not three, not four, no five? 0:16:30.320 --> 0:16:33.840 How about six months? Again, nothing I did. 0:16:33.880 --> 0:16:36.040 So Doc Mike, who doesn't really call a show much anymore, 0:16:36.040 --> 0:16:38.080 he still texts me or calls me every once in 0:16:38.080 --> 0:16:38.800 a while off the air. 0:16:39.560 --> 0:16:42.960 So Doc Mike from Chicago, you got the Doc. 0:16:43.320 --> 0:16:47.120 He's the guy famously during the pandemic who was booking 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:52.160 urine therapists and other guests on the air for urine therapy. 0:16:52.880 --> 0:16:56.960 So my man, Doc's been a semi regular contributor for 0:16:57.160 --> 0:17:00.880 when he's not in jail or traveling around for twenty years. 0:17:01.160 --> 0:17:03.080 Over twenty years, Doc's been a fan of the show, 0:17:03.320 --> 0:17:05.199 and so he goes way back, we go by him. 0:17:05.240 --> 0:17:07.359 Doc was a young guy. He's an old guy now. 0:17:08.119 --> 0:17:10.040 I was middle aged when he started listening. I was 0:17:10.040 --> 0:17:11.840 really an old guy. I've been doing this a long time. 0:17:12.280 --> 0:17:17.240 So Doc famously sent a goat head in the mail 0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:22.080 and so one of the management people got very upset 0:17:22.800 --> 0:17:24.919 with me, and this was rightfully. So this, you know, 0:17:24.960 --> 0:17:27.240 the thing that happened with Mike the Leprek, and I 0:17:27.280 --> 0:17:29.560 feel that in many ways that was an overreaction. But 0:17:29.640 --> 0:17:32.199 with Doc, Mike like the male thing. And again this 0:17:32.280 --> 0:17:36.439 is another situation where I did not tell him to 0:17:36.480 --> 0:17:40.240 do it, but Doc sent a goatthead, which would have 0:17:40.320 --> 0:17:45.920 been fine if the package had not started dripping blood 0:17:47.400 --> 0:17:52.320 in the mail room. And so that's like a hasmat situation. 0:17:53.680 --> 0:17:58.640 Ove So the iHeart and mail people as you would 0:17:58.680 --> 0:18:02.560 imagine if there's a package with someone's name on it 0:18:02.600 --> 0:18:05.320 and there's like some kind of fluid which may or 0:18:05.320 --> 0:18:08.000 may not be blood tripping out of it. Like did 0:18:08.040 --> 0:18:13.119 somebody send body parts to Ben? Well, it was body parts, 0:18:13.119 --> 0:18:15.679 but it was from a goat farm somewhere in Iowa. 0:18:16.640 --> 0:18:20.320 And this is again a situation where I didn't tell Doc. 0:18:20.080 --> 0:18:20.480 To sent it. 0:18:20.560 --> 0:18:22.280 I told him I don't need a goathhead. He said, 0:18:22.320 --> 0:18:23.959 you need a godhead. I'm going to send you a GoAhead. 0:18:24.080 --> 0:18:26.359 This was back before the Cubs had won the World Series. 0:18:27.400 --> 0:18:32.160 So Doc and when Doc assumed that by us getting 0:18:32.200 --> 0:18:34.320 a GoAhead, the Cubs would win the World Series, which, oh, 0:18:34.320 --> 0:18:37.119 by the way, it took about god. I think this 0:18:37.280 --> 0:18:40.680 was like three when they were on that playoff run. 0:18:41.720 --> 0:18:44.200 So it took another thirteen years for it to work. 0:18:44.240 --> 0:18:46.480 But eventually it did work. Eventually it did work. 0:18:47.359 --> 0:18:51.600 So I have a public service announcement. This is a. 0:18:51.000 --> 0:18:56.880 Fifth hour ben malor public service announcement for all future 0:18:57.000 --> 0:19:01.040 pe ones who are fortunate enough to get the invite 0:19:01.440 --> 0:19:04.399 or force themselves and invite themselves and get the chance 0:19:04.840 --> 0:19:09.440 to walk in the hollowed hallways of Fox Sports Radio Studios. 0:19:10.920 --> 0:19:18.400 This is not Disneyland, it's not Universal Studios, it's not SeaWorld. 0:19:18.680 --> 0:19:19.360 Although some of. 0:19:19.280 --> 0:19:22.119 The people that work there look like they could work 0:19:22.160 --> 0:19:24.600 at all of those places, or be attractions at all 0:19:24.640 --> 0:19:25.400 of those places. 0:19:25.840 --> 0:19:28.159 We have a lot of goofy people. There's a few 0:19:28.240 --> 0:19:31.520 of us that look like shambou So that's a dated reference. 0:19:31.560 --> 0:19:36.399 But anyway, so just in the future, if you're coming 0:19:36.440 --> 0:19:39.920 to visit the nighttime show, don't go during the day. 0:19:40.400 --> 0:19:43.520 Leave the daytime people alone. Those sweet spirits. During the 0:19:43.560 --> 0:19:47.920 day they cannot handle you. They don't get me, and 0:19:48.000 --> 0:19:51.320 they certainly can't handle you. And I'm convinced it's going 0:19:51.359 --> 0:19:54.680 to take a long time for them to recover from 0:19:54.760 --> 0:20:00.560 what we are calling the Sheleley Shenanigans that took place. 0:20:01.200 --> 0:20:04.679 So Mike was very kind, Michael Leprechaun. He brought a 0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:07.679 lot of gifts. That Lorena was away. You know, Coop's 0:20:07.720 --> 0:20:11.639 been gone forever, so they were all gone. But I 0:20:11.760 --> 0:20:14.400 was there, and it's my name's on the show, it's 0:20:14.720 --> 0:20:20.199 my product. And Mike was apologetic. He had a different 0:20:20.280 --> 0:20:24.760 version of events than I got from management. I wish 0:20:24.840 --> 0:20:27.879 I'd known that I would have let management know his 0:20:28.040 --> 0:20:29.720 side of the story. They only got one side of 0:20:29.760 --> 0:20:32.040 the story, and that's the side they chose to go with. 0:20:32.880 --> 0:20:33.720 He apologized. 0:20:33.760 --> 0:20:35.440 He said he was just excited. He wanted to see 0:20:35.440 --> 0:20:36.320 where the studio was. 0:20:36.359 --> 0:20:39.200 He booked a hotel room down the street because he 0:20:39.240 --> 0:20:43.000 wanted to be right there. And I still remember when 0:20:43.000 --> 0:20:47.480 I went. We had a meeting place and I told Mike, 0:20:47.560 --> 0:20:51.640 I said, listen, it was forty five minutes in the show. 0:20:51.640 --> 0:20:53.679 I said, Mike, I'm going to go out. I'm going 0:20:53.760 --> 0:20:57.000 to open the door, come in. And so I opened 0:20:57.040 --> 0:20:59.320 the door looking for Mike to Leprecaun. Now I've never 0:20:59.359 --> 0:21:01.120 met him at this point. This was at night after 0:21:01.119 --> 0:21:04.520 the whole daytime fireworks show, which is appropriate this Fourth 0:21:04.560 --> 0:21:08.399 of July weekend. So Mike the Leprechaun is standing on 0:21:08.440 --> 0:21:12.280 the other side at the corner of Sepalveta and Ventura, 0:21:12.960 --> 0:21:16.600 so he's on He's across the street from the studios 0:21:16.640 --> 0:21:21.000 on Sepulveda. He then I'm like, I'm waving at him 0:21:21.000 --> 0:21:22.400 because i only have a couple of minutes I gotta 0:21:22.400 --> 0:21:27.000 get back in the studio, And so I'm waving at 0:21:27.840 --> 0:21:32.600 Mike the Leprechaun frantically trying to get him to cross 0:21:32.640 --> 0:21:35.679 the street, very busy street in Los Angeles in the 0:21:35.720 --> 0:21:38.240 San Fernando Valley, and Sherman Oak's there to get him 0:21:38.280 --> 0:21:42.840 to cross a crossover and Mike is talking to like 0:21:42.960 --> 0:21:46.720 some homeless guy at the bus stop across the street 0:21:47.880 --> 0:21:50.280 and decides, well, I'm not going to walk down to 0:21:50.320 --> 0:21:52.200 the crosswalk, and I'm certainly not going to run down 0:21:52.200 --> 0:21:58.280 to the crosswalk. I'm just gonna slowly walk across Sepulvita Boulevard. 0:21:59.720 --> 0:22:02.000 And he took us time. La La la la, la 0:22:02.160 --> 0:22:06.400 la la. Because leprechauns can't walk fast are leprechauns. He's 0:22:06.440 --> 0:22:12.080 the world's tallest leprechaun, And so he slowly walked across 0:22:12.119 --> 0:22:16.840 the street and I escorted him in. He was carrying 0:22:16.920 --> 0:22:22.240 bags of gifts because that's what lepercuns do, and there 0:22:22.280 --> 0:22:26.080 you go. So I did inform Mike the leprekhn because 0:22:26.080 --> 0:22:28.080 he was apologetic, and he's a big fan of the 0:22:28.119 --> 0:22:30.040 show and he's probably gonna hear this at some point. 0:22:30.119 --> 0:22:31.240 Maybe he's listening right now. 0:22:31.680 --> 0:22:35.679 We told Mike, we said, listen, we're not banning you. 0:22:35.680 --> 0:22:37.840 You're getting us in trouble. We're not going to banish you. 0:22:38.280 --> 0:22:39.919 We're not going to send you to the end of 0:22:39.920 --> 0:22:43.159 the rainbow, although we'd like if you could go to 0:22:43.200 --> 0:22:46.399 the end of the rainbow and send us some gold coins. 0:22:46.400 --> 0:22:49.320 But he did bring some chocolate gold coins, so that 0:22:49.400 --> 0:22:52.520 was very kind of him. All Right, we have a 0:22:52.560 --> 0:22:56.080 little time left, a little time left on the on 0:22:56.119 --> 0:22:58.720 the pod, so some food he fun. I thought this 0:22:58.760 --> 0:23:02.399 would be appropriate as I did a bonus Mallard monologue 0:23:02.400 --> 0:23:07.359 there on Mike the Leprechaun. Foody fun very popular. I know, 0:23:07.480 --> 0:23:13.800 nico A big fan of this in Vancouver loves it, 0:23:14.000 --> 0:23:16.040 and many of the people we met at the Vancouver 0:23:16.080 --> 0:23:20.280 Meet and Greet a while back, big fans, big fans. 0:23:20.480 --> 0:23:24.800 So this is a day in America where it's all 0:23:24.800 --> 0:23:28.480 about barbecue, burgers, hot dogs and all those are traditional 0:23:28.520 --> 0:23:33.720 foods eaten this Independence Day weekend. The taste of America. 0:23:35.119 --> 0:23:38.240 It is interesting to note that is you might imagine 0:23:38.440 --> 0:23:43.000 two hundred and fifty years ago, things were a little 0:23:43.080 --> 0:23:45.760 bit different. In fact, not just a little bit different, 0:23:46.240 --> 0:23:50.160 they were a hell of a lot different back back 0:23:50.200 --> 0:23:55.639 in the day. And twenty years is a generation. So 0:23:55.680 --> 0:23:56.920 if you go back. 0:23:58.280 --> 0:24:03.520 Two hundred and fifty years, let's do some malor math 0:24:03.600 --> 0:24:03.960 on that. 0:24:04.840 --> 0:24:09.239 Two hundred and fifty divided by twenty, so that is 0:24:09.440 --> 0:24:13.600 twelve and a half generations ago, twelve and a half 0:24:13.680 --> 0:24:19.360 generations on American soil, since the beginning of modern America. 0:24:20.200 --> 0:24:25.880 The Founding Fathers twelve and a half generations ago, their 0:24:25.960 --> 0:24:29.760 taste buds were not quite like our taste buds, and 0:24:30.520 --> 0:24:35.840 they loved booze. Now we still love booze, and we're 0:24:35.880 --> 0:24:40.400 told those that have studied the Founding Fathers. They celebrated 0:24:41.280 --> 0:24:43.639 the July fourth Light, which I guess it wasn't really 0:24:43.720 --> 0:24:45.879