1 00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:21,520 Speaker 1: Hello, Emily, A baddie here, coming to you from the 2 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:26,000 Speaker 1: AG studio. You are listening to five minute Friday from Hurdle. 3 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:27,720 Speaker 2: It's a beautiful day. 4 00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:30,720 Speaker 1: At least it is on Thursday as I'm recording this 5 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:34,200 Speaker 1: here in New York. I am, my spirits are high, 6 00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:35,639 Speaker 1: the temperatures are high. 7 00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:37,640 Speaker 2: I think it's like seventy degrees out there today. 8 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:39,640 Speaker 1: I'm in a good mood, and I'm in a good 9 00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:46,239 Speaker 1: mood despite the fact that the elevator in my building 10 00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:52,480 Speaker 1: has basically been out on and off for I mean 11 00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:56,040 Speaker 1: this week, for sure, one elevator is completely out of service. 12 00:00:56,080 --> 00:01:00,000 Speaker 1: There's two for the building, and it is and how 13 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:05,039 Speaker 1: has been so interesting to see how people react to 14 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:09,360 Speaker 1: this fact. So I go into this story also wanting 15 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:12,920 Speaker 1: to state that in the episode that I posted from Wednesday, 16 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:18,240 Speaker 1: where I chatted with my friend Nick Dio about staving 17 00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:21,440 Speaker 1: off burnout and managing burnout and the concept of quote 18 00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:25,640 Speaker 1: unquote breaking the metrix, he said that something that he 19 00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:28,000 Speaker 1: loves to do when he's feeling a little bit stuck 20 00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:30,120 Speaker 1: is to do something nice for somebody else. 21 00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:33,280 Speaker 2: And so, like I said, beautiful day. 22 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:37,800 Speaker 1: Gotta notice that I had a package downstairs which typically. 23 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:40,720 Speaker 2: Wouldn't be would be something very exciting. Right. 24 00:01:40,880 --> 00:01:44,200 Speaker 1: We love mail, but we don't love mail when you 25 00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:47,600 Speaker 1: have to walk down a bunch of flights of stairs, 26 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 1: many flights of stairs to get it, and then walk 27 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:52,240 Speaker 1: back up all of the flights of stairs, it becomes 28 00:01:52,240 --> 00:01:55,000 Speaker 1: something instead of taking, you know, a couple of minutes 29 00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:58,360 Speaker 1: down and up, it's more of an activity. I decided 30 00:01:58,360 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: that I was going to go down, and so I 31 00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:02,280 Speaker 1: went down. I was gonna grab my package. And I 32 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:05,000 Speaker 1: thought to myself, it is too nice just to go 33 00:02:05,080 --> 00:02:06,880 Speaker 1: down and go right back up. 34 00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:11,600 Speaker 2: So I walked over to my doorman and I said 35 00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:13,560 Speaker 2: to him, I said, I'm gonna go for a walk. 36 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,359 Speaker 2: Do you want anything? He's like, no, no, I'm good. 37 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:18,519 Speaker 1: I'm like, if I happen to go into a bodega, 38 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,320 Speaker 1: would you want something from the bodega? 39 00:02:21,760 --> 00:02:24,400 Speaker 2: He goes, are you serious? And I was like yep. 40 00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:26,639 Speaker 2: And then he was like, I'll take a black coffee. 41 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:30,840 Speaker 1: So I did that. I took a walk around the block. 42 00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:36,120 Speaker 1: I put Dio's advice into practice. I grabbed myself there 43 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:38,720 Speaker 1: a fountain soda, a fountain Dike coke on a nice 44 00:02:38,760 --> 00:02:41,320 Speaker 1: day is something that is a joy in my life. 45 00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:44,080 Speaker 1: I got a fountain Dike coke. I got him a 46 00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:48,239 Speaker 1: black coffee. I walked back in, I gave him the coffee, 47 00:02:48,480 --> 00:02:52,519 Speaker 1: I grabbed my package, and I very happily walked back 48 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:57,799 Speaker 1: up the stairs. My quads are definitely feeling it after 49 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:00,560 Speaker 1: this week, but it makes me laugh a little bit 50 00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:03,440 Speaker 1: because on my journey up the stairs, I'm carrying a package, 51 00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:06,200 Speaker 1: I've got my diet coke. There are just so many 52 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:09,120 Speaker 1: people that are complaining about the fact that the elevator 53 00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:11,760 Speaker 1: isn't working, and everyone is frustrated and how could we 54 00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:15,280 Speaker 1: live here? And I'm still kind of thinking, like, how 55 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:17,920 Speaker 1: lucky am I to live here? Like how lucky am 56 00:03:17,919 --> 00:03:19,920 Speaker 1: I to live in a place where I don't know 57 00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:22,639 Speaker 1: the elevator goes out. And I know that sounds kind 58 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:24,960 Speaker 1: of silly and like you might be rolling your eyes 59 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:27,919 Speaker 1: at me, But it's all in perspective, right, It's all 60 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:32,320 Speaker 1: in the power of perspective. And my perspective on what 61 00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:37,520 Speaker 1: could be considered an inconvenience is that perhaps it's an opportunity. 62 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: Perhaps this thing is happening for me, because really, if 63 00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:46,360 Speaker 1: the elevator was working, I wouldn't have taken the break 64 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:51,040 Speaker 1: that I actually really wanted and arguably needed. If the 65 00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:54,160 Speaker 1: elevator was working, I would have just gone straight back 66 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:59,000 Speaker 1: upstairs and gotten back into the groove, or maybe procrastinated 67 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:04,480 Speaker 1: getting back into the So I am choosing to find 68 00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:09,600 Speaker 1: the silver lining of something that may be less than stellar. 69 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:12,880 Speaker 2: Let's put it that way. My prompt for you this week, 70 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:15,360 Speaker 2: what's one little thing you can do for someone in 71 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:17,160 Speaker 2: your life over the weekend. 72 00:04:17,279 --> 00:04:19,800 Speaker 1: Doesn't need to be big, does it need to involve 73 00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:23,000 Speaker 1: spending money, and it can be even as simple as 74 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:26,960 Speaker 1: sending a nice text message. Again, what is one small 75 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:30,600 Speaker 1: thing that you can do for somebody else this weekend? 76 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:33,080 Speaker 2: And now a listener question. 77 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:36,359 Speaker 3: Hi, Emily, I've heard you mentioned on the podcast a 78 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:38,880 Speaker 3: couple times that you're working with a life coach, and 79 00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:40,719 Speaker 3: I was wondering if you would be willing to talk 80 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:43,360 Speaker 3: a little bit more about it. How did you decide 81 00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,440 Speaker 3: that you wanted to work with a life coach, how 82 00:04:45,480 --> 00:04:48,359 Speaker 3: did you find a life coach, what qualifications did you 83 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:51,400 Speaker 3: look for, and just what your overall experience of life 84 00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:54,560 Speaker 3: coaching has been like. I know you've seen a therapist 85 00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:56,400 Speaker 3: in the past, so I'm curious to know how it 86 00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:59,040 Speaker 3: compares to therapy and what advice you'd give to someone 87 00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:01,640 Speaker 3: if they're wondering whatther they should find a therapist or 88 00:05:01,680 --> 00:05:04,640 Speaker 3: find a life coach. Anything you'd be willing to share 89 00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:07,640 Speaker 3: about the experience would be really appreciated. Thanks so much. 90 00:05:07,839 --> 00:05:08,640 Speaker 3: That's the podcast. 91 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:09,760 Speaker 2: Great question. 92 00:05:10,120 --> 00:05:13,279 Speaker 1: So, yes, I have worked with a therapist in the past, 93 00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:16,240 Speaker 1: and I have been working with my current life coach 94 00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 1: for goodness, maybe four months at least. 95 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:23,560 Speaker 2: I want to say. 96 00:05:23,920 --> 00:05:26,840 Speaker 1: We started working together in February, so about four months, 97 00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:30,520 Speaker 1: and there have been some big differences between the two, 98 00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:34,240 Speaker 1: although I will say that, yes, there can be a 99 00:05:34,240 --> 00:05:36,800 Speaker 1: lot of similarities between working with a life coach and 100 00:05:36,839 --> 00:05:40,120 Speaker 1: working with a therapist. And sometimes when I reference something 101 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:42,839 Speaker 1: that I've learned speaking to my life coach, I just 102 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:46,120 Speaker 1: go to reference her as a therapist because it seems 103 00:05:46,160 --> 00:05:49,359 Speaker 1: a little less like froofy, if that makes sense. 104 00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:52,320 Speaker 2: I digress. So, there are a lot. 105 00:05:52,120 --> 00:05:56,280 Speaker 1: Of different certifications that someone can go through to become 106 00:05:56,440 --> 00:06:00,040 Speaker 1: a certified life coach, and the training to become a 107 00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:04,880 Speaker 1: life coach is let's say it's extensive, but it's not 108 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:09,680 Speaker 1: the same or nearly as lengthy as becoming a therapist. 109 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:13,919 Speaker 1: So typically speaking, you can become a sharedified life coach 110 00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:18,240 Speaker 1: within a year, and you want to look for a 111 00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:24,960 Speaker 1: life coaching program that is ICF accredited. ICF stands for 112 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:30,160 Speaker 1: the International Coaching Federation, and essentially you want an ICF 113 00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:34,280 Speaker 1: accredited education opportunity. Because these have gone through a rigorous 114 00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:38,160 Speaker 1: review process. They've demonstrated that the curriculum aligns with the 115 00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:42,440 Speaker 1: ICF definition of coaching and core competencies and quote of ethics. 116 00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:45,960 Speaker 2: And these are really the best of the best. 117 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:48,440 Speaker 1: These aren't the kind of programs that you log onto 118 00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:51,520 Speaker 1: a website and within a month you're somehow a certified 119 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:55,400 Speaker 1: life coach. I work with a woman who does core 120 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:59,440 Speaker 1: energy coaching, and essentially the goal of this methodology is 121 00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:02,320 Speaker 1: getting to the root or as it's called, the core, 122 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:07,279 Speaker 1: of someone's challenges by identifying and shifting their inner thoughts. 123 00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:09,600 Speaker 1: And when I started working with her, I took like 124 00:07:09,640 --> 00:07:12,200 Speaker 1: this lengthy survey so that she could get to know 125 00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:16,160 Speaker 1: a lot about me, my energy and where I spend 126 00:07:16,360 --> 00:07:19,280 Speaker 1: a lot of it. Now, without going into extensive detail, 127 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:22,480 Speaker 1: I will say that the difference, the biggest difference between 128 00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:24,640 Speaker 1: working with this life coach now and working with a 129 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:28,800 Speaker 1: therapist previously is I was doing cognitive behavioral therapy before, 130 00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:31,360 Speaker 1: and I never really felt like I was getting much 131 00:07:31,640 --> 00:07:33,800 Speaker 1: from my time there, Like it was nice to have 132 00:07:33,880 --> 00:07:36,560 Speaker 1: someone to speak to about what was going on in 133 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:39,000 Speaker 1: my life outside of a close friend, someone that I 134 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:42,520 Speaker 1: could speak to without judgment, but that really was what 135 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:45,240 Speaker 1: it was for me. I didn't walk out of there 136 00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:47,840 Speaker 1: with a lot of different revelations on what was going 137 00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:48,800 Speaker 1: on in my life. 138 00:07:49,280 --> 00:07:51,360 Speaker 2: She may have asked me questions. 139 00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:54,080 Speaker 1: Every once in a while, but I wasn't really prompted 140 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:58,600 Speaker 1: to take different courses of action, and after a while, 141 00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:01,120 Speaker 1: I felt like that experience got really stagnant for me. 142 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:05,480 Speaker 1: Within these four months of working with this new life coach, 143 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:09,520 Speaker 1: I feel like she challenges me and says things to 144 00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:12,080 Speaker 1: me in a way that really make me think, that 145 00:08:12,160 --> 00:08:17,000 Speaker 1: really make me understand my behaviors, and I can get 146 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,640 Speaker 1: a sense of why I might be acting a certain way, 147 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,640 Speaker 1: and if I want to change the way that I'm acting, 148 00:08:22,680 --> 00:08:25,679 Speaker 1: then I now really understand and own that that changes 149 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:29,920 Speaker 1: completely within my power. And that the word power, it's 150 00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:33,600 Speaker 1: really empowering. Whether you are seeking a life coach or 151 00:08:33,640 --> 00:08:35,959 Speaker 1: a therapist. The best piece of advice that I can 152 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,800 Speaker 1: give you, and this is what I did is get 153 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:40,080 Speaker 1: a referral from someone who may be working with a 154 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:42,160 Speaker 1: practitioner that you think could be really good for you, 155 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:46,040 Speaker 1: and also date a round. I regret not doing more 156 00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:48,679 Speaker 1: of that when I started working with my first therapist, 157 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:51,520 Speaker 1: and I felt a little bit guilty about the idea 158 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:53,760 Speaker 1: that it might not be the right fit and stuck 159 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:56,880 Speaker 1: it out for perhaps longer than I should have. I'm 160 00:08:56,880 --> 00:09:00,320 Speaker 1: still grateful for your experience, nonetheless, and it taught me 161 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:02,680 Speaker 1: what to do differently going forward. 162 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:03,880 Speaker 2: So date a round. 163 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:07,959 Speaker 1: Remember that this individual is providing you a service, so 164 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:11,080 Speaker 1: if you're not completely satisfied with how the service is going, 165 00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:16,720 Speaker 1: you have the opportunity to seek business somewhere else. Huh Okay, 166 00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:18,679 Speaker 1: I think that was a mouthful, but I also feel 167 00:09:18,679 --> 00:09:21,199 Speaker 1: like I addressed all the parts of this question. 168 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:24,200 Speaker 2: Thanks for listening. I would love more questions. 169 00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:26,440 Speaker 1: The link to leave me a voice message and have 170 00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:29,920 Speaker 1: your question answered on an upcoming episode of Five Minute 171 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:35,560 Speaker 1: Friday is in the show notes. Another hurdle conquered. Catch 172 00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:36,400 Speaker 1: you guys next time.