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Speaker 1: What's up you guys. We are back, but not permanently.

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Speaker 1: We are still off season and we miss you. And

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Speaker 1: because we miss you, we are pulling out one of

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Speaker 1: our favorite episodes from the archives, featuring the Funny Mama

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Speaker 1: aka Katrise. As you know, this month is Autism Awareness Month,

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Speaker 1: so we are talking everything autism.

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Speaker 2: And Katrice shares how she was able to begin the

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Speaker 2: healing process of her son using holistic practices, vitamins, diets, nutrients,

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Speaker 2: and saying fuck the American healthcare system. So shout out

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Speaker 2: to all the autism parents out there. This episode is

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Speaker 2: extremely informative, extremely funny, and we hope you enjoy. So

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Speaker 2: I'm really excited because today we have a special guest

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Speaker 2: all the way from Maryland, and you guys have tagged

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Speaker 2: me on her Instagram a few different times, and so

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Speaker 2: I'm really excited to bring the Funny Mama aka Catrees

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Speaker 2: onto good Moms, Welcome to the show.

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Speaker 3: Hi, Hey, how are you all?

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Speaker 2: So good? We're good, We're good, and so Catrise. I

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Speaker 2: don't think he's ever pulled a card, but today we

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Speaker 2: made her shuffle them and pulled pull a card. I

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Speaker 2: pulled one, which was really scary. Apparently it was the

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Speaker 2: double card. I hadn't touched the deck. She was like, no, no,

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Speaker 2: no time, let me put my mad And so we're

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Speaker 2: going to read two card polls today. She pulled the

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Speaker 2: Sun card.

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Speaker 1: So first the Devil card. I think sometimes we pull

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Speaker 1: cards and we have a misconception of what they mean.

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Speaker 1: Just like in life, things happen, they seem bad, they

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Speaker 1: seem like maybe a world's going to end, but oftentimes

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Speaker 1: there's underlying messages. So let's see what the underlying messages

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Speaker 1: with the devil today, because I'm sure there's some good

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Speaker 1: in the devil. The devil card represents your shadow or

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Speaker 1: darker self and the negative forces that can strain you

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Speaker 1: and hold you back from being the best version of yourself.

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Speaker 1: You may be at the effect of negative habits, dependencies, behaviors,

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Speaker 1: thought patterns, relationships, and addictions. You have found yourself trapped

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Speaker 1: between the short term pleasure you receive and the longer

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Speaker 1: term pain you experience.

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Speaker 3: Ooh, this does not sound enourging at all.

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Speaker 1: Good. This is good.

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Speaker 2: This is self reflection.

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Speaker 1: Everybody has a shadow side, it's just we're not always

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Speaker 1: down to explore that.

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Speaker 2: And I think this is a good time.

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Speaker 1: The devil card often appears when you have been tricked

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Speaker 1: into thinking you have no control over your shadow self

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Speaker 1: or these negative forces, and that you can never break

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Speaker 1: free from their hold. You believe you need it and

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Speaker 1: you must have it, even if it means going against

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Speaker 1: what you know to be right to obtain it.

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Speaker 2: Wow, this is for me.

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Speaker 1: On the positive side, let's skip right down to the bottom.

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Speaker 1: The devil can also show a powerful attachment between two people,

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Speaker 1: such as a mom and her newborn or a new

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Speaker 1: romance still in this honeymoon phase. Be careful, though, because

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Speaker 1: with the devil card, this healthy attachment can turn into

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Speaker 1: an unhealthy codependent relationship if you lose connection with your

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Speaker 1: inner guidance or you don't protect your personal boundaries. Moms,

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Speaker 1: if your whole life world in existence is your motherfucking kid,

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Speaker 1: you may need to come up for air and remember

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Speaker 1: who the fuck you are. Even your child can be

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Speaker 1: a negative attachment if you don't have attachment to your

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Speaker 1: motherfucking self.

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Speaker 2: Amen.

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Speaker 1: The devil can also represent sexuality in your wild side.

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Speaker 1: You may be exploring bondage fetishes and your deepest, darkest fantasy.

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Speaker 2: Okay, how with the BDSNA.

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Speaker 1: Freaky Biddy told you the Devil's not all that. If

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Speaker 1: you can do this within a safe, sacred space, it

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Speaker 1: can be very enriching experience. However, it has the potential

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Speaker 1: to turn into something that you may be unsafe.

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Speaker 3: For you just keep on bringing it best, end it there.

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Speaker 1: If you have some dark fantasies you want to explore

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Speaker 1: now the time. Well, I think this.

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Speaker 2: Actually is in line with the theme of the month,

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Speaker 2: which is redesigning your life and you know, at attaching

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Speaker 2: yourself to things that you know are not serving you

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Speaker 2: and comfortable on the things that you know intuitively are

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Speaker 2: for you.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes we attach our things. I call it, well, I

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Speaker 1: think everyone calls them trauma bonds. And sometimes it long

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Speaker 1: term doesn't really feel good, but we're so used to

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Speaker 1: it being comfortable that it's almost like satanism, Like you

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Speaker 1: hurt yourself because it feels good temporarily, but long term

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Speaker 1: it doesn't feel good. But some strange part of you

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Speaker 1: is addicted and attached to the pain because somewhere in

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Speaker 1: your lifetime and your childhood probably it's felt comfortable and familiar.

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Speaker 1: Be careful of what's familiar, because familiar alarity can definitely

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Speaker 1: be It's not equal good, and it can be perceived

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Speaker 1: as comfortable and it's not good.

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Speaker 3: Do you know my therapist told me what she told

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Speaker 3: me because I was like, why do I always choose

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Speaker 3: the bad guy? Why am I? And she said, or

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Speaker 3: like a relationship where we're like fussing all the time,

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Speaker 3: and it's like why And she said, what did you

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Speaker 3: see growing up? Because whatever you saw growing up, even

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Speaker 3: if it was just like if you watch TV all

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Speaker 3: the time, good TV, there's arguing, there's this and that,

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Speaker 3: or you know your parents or whatever, that's what you

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Speaker 3: associate with love. So when a good guy comes along

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Speaker 3: who you're not arguing or fighting with, you feel like

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Speaker 3: this isn't love, This isn't real. So that's what I'm

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Speaker 3: working on in therapy.

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Speaker 1: I literally just had this conversation before we started. I

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Speaker 1: was like, I'm being triggered by my parents. But I'm

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Speaker 1: thirty three years old. They're fighting, so it's affecting me.

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Speaker 1: But it's yeah, So Curtly, that love that you're familiar with,

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Speaker 1: you know, the healthy love you were supposed to see. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: onto more positive things.

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Speaker 2: The sun? What is the sun card? The sun? Would

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Speaker 2: you like to read it? Okay? The Sun positivity, fun, warmth, success, vitality.

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Speaker 2: The sun represents success, radiance, and abundance. Gives you strength

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Speaker 2: and tells you that no matter where you go or

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Speaker 2: what you do, your positive and radiant energy will follow

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Speaker 2: you and bring you happiness and joy. People are drawn

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Speaker 2: to you because you can always see the bright side

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Speaker 2: and bring such warmth into other people's lives. The beautiful

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Speaker 2: warm energy is what will get you through the tough

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Speaker 2: times and help you succeed. If you're going through a

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Speaker 2: difficult time, the sun brings you the message you have

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Speaker 2: been waiting for that things will get better, a lot better.

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Speaker 2: Through the challenges along your path, you discovered who you

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Speaker 2: are and why you're here. Now you are full of

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Speaker 2: energy and zeal for the future and can already perceive

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Speaker 2: success and abundance flowing to you. The sun connects you

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Speaker 2: to the power base. It's not fear driven egotistical, but

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Speaker 2: abundant inner energy radiating through you right now. Well, God

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Speaker 2: damn y I like that.

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Speaker 1: If you do the work, and you deal with your

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Speaker 1: shadow sides, and you deal and delve in all the

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Speaker 1: darkness that your soul is harboring in at the end

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Speaker 1: of the tunnel, it's the sun, your truest self, the light,

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Speaker 1: the beam and the success. Perfect for designing your life

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Speaker 1: because you have to do the work to get to

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Speaker 1: where you want to go and be in the sun.

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Speaker 2: A man, I'm a Tarot card reader.

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Speaker 1: Bitch pulls two cards.

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Speaker 2: I believe it. You know, if I saw it, and

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Speaker 2: if I went and got a reading and you broke

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Speaker 2: it down like you know, the bitch was right. I

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Speaker 2: said that I had at least the trauma bonds. She

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Speaker 2: was using all the words, the hot words, the hot

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Speaker 2: words and the streets. But yeah, I think I feel

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Speaker 2: like that though these card pools were balanced.

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Speaker 1: They're balanced. I feel like they're speaking to me. I

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Speaker 1: have a lot of the double moment of something going on.

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Speaker 2: So well, welcome to the show Catrees. Can you tell

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Speaker 2: our listeners a little about you? I know your mama.

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Speaker 2: Maybe tell them how many kids you?

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Speaker 3: Yes, I'm a mom of three, so two that our

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Speaker 3: birth and one bonus baby, and I have two teenagers

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Speaker 3: and one is four. I started all over, it's so

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Speaker 3: much fun. I was right there, the finish line was

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Speaker 3: right there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: So I've been a mom literally my entire adult life.

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Speaker 3: I was pregnant when I was eighteen. I had him

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Speaker 3: when I was nineteen, so I never got that time

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Speaker 3: to like let loosen that mom anxiety has always been there.

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Speaker 2: It's great. You had mentioned before we were talking that

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Speaker 2: you kind of grew up in like a religious family

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Speaker 2: or like well, and that you were because you got

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Speaker 2: married on you got.

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Speaker 3: Married when you Yes, I got married at nineteen. But

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Speaker 3: my family, like my mom and my dad. My mom,

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Speaker 3: you know, would take us to church every Sunday and

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Speaker 3: stuff like that. My dad isn't very religious. He believes

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Speaker 3: in God, but it's pretty much the extent of his religion.

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Speaker 3: And my mom she is very religious, but she was

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Speaker 3: never She's like the rebbull of her family, so she

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Speaker 3: never was pushing anything on us or anything like that.

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Speaker 3: We went to church, we prayed, and we were kind

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Speaker 3: human beings. That's all she they really pushed. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: I got married at nineteen because I got pregnant and

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Speaker 3: it just felt like the right thing to do. I

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Speaker 3: didn't want my family to think I was just hoeing

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Speaker 3: out here. And then we got divorced a year and

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Speaker 3: a half later, so it was so much fun. That

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Speaker 3: was even a bigger scandal. So yeah, and then I

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Speaker 3: got remarried at twenty eight or twenty six, I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I don't know the time.

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Speaker 2: Well in between that time, So you were divorced in

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Speaker 2: twenty one and then you remarried at twenty eight, Like

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Speaker 2: what was like dating as a single mom and then

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Speaker 2: being that young too and being a mom? Like what

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Speaker 2: was that like?

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Speaker 1: Like?

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Speaker 2: Cause I think for us we had our kids. You know,

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Speaker 2: we're not little a lot later in life, but we were,

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Speaker 2: you know, in our later ends of twenties. Whereas when

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Speaker 2: you have a child at twenty one and you're you're

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Speaker 2: trying to date, Like, what is that like? Because I

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Speaker 2: know we do have some listeners that are that are

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Speaker 2: young young parents.

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Speaker 3: I think a lot before I met the person that

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Speaker 3: i'm divorcing now, before that, I was more focused on

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Speaker 3: showing my friends like I'm still here, I still got it.

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Speaker 3: I was the only person who had a kid, like,

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Speaker 3: don't worry, I'm still going out, I'm still doing this.

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Speaker 3: And in that, the only guys that I would meet

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Speaker 3: were basically full of shit. You know, it's from like

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Speaker 3: the club this and that or whatever. It's like why

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Speaker 3: are you doing to see yourself? But I love that shit,

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Speaker 3: And yeah, I think my whole focus was because everybody

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Speaker 3: made it seem like you became a mom, your life

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Speaker 3: is over. And I feel like that's just what people do.

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Speaker 3: That's what society does. It's like when you buy a car,

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Speaker 3: as soon as you drive it off the lot, it depreciates.

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Speaker 3: And that's how people treat people who are moms. It's

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Speaker 3: like the moment you're pregnant, it's like okay, oh you're pregnant, Okay, whatever,

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Speaker 3: you have the baby, and it's like, well, you're not

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Speaker 3: good anymore. You can't do this, you can't do that.

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Speaker 3: And it just always was like rules. And for me,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm twenty one, Like I still want to,

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Speaker 3: you know, have fun be twenty one. So I would

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Speaker 3: say to still live your best life. Just block your

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Speaker 3: kids from your social media so they can't see what

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Speaker 3: you all. My kids are blocked for my stories. Really

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Speaker 3: they can see like my page, but they're like blocked,

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Speaker 3: but their friends find me.

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Speaker 2: I have to like block. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I feel like it's none in your damn business. What's

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Speaker 3: on there. I'm most of the time talking shit about

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Speaker 3: you anyway. I don't need to cause any trauma in

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Speaker 3: your life that you're gonna go to therapy for later

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Speaker 3: because I love you, but I'm to my friends, so

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Speaker 3: that's it. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, No, I feel that our kids are only six,

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Speaker 2: so they probably know how to use social media better

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Speaker 2: than most though, because irib in my phone knowing how

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Speaker 2: to use stories and shit.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like putting on the filter.

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Speaker 2: Yesterday I fell asleep. Why did she get my phone

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Speaker 2: take a picture of me asleep and send it to

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Speaker 2: like five people? And I yeah, And then I got

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Speaker 2: I woke up to like text messages like are you okay?

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Speaker 2: What's going on? Like why are you sending me this?

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Speaker 2: I was like, why the fuck do you think I

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Speaker 2: would send you this? My six year old sent me

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Speaker 2: that and it was a beautiful photo too. I'm a

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Speaker 2: post it. I was like, wow, I look really cute.

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Speaker 4: Sleep.

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Speaker 1: That was really cute.

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Speaker 3: Sleep.

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Speaker 1: Well, before we get into this, do you have any affirmations?

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Speaker 1: We usually ask our guests to give our listeners an affirmation.

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Speaker 1: Are there any affirmations that you tell yourself or that

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Speaker 1: like your go to favorite affirmations?

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Speaker 3: Yes, this one I've been saying for the past two weeks.

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Speaker 3: Everything I need to succeed I already have within.

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Speaker 2: Myself everything I need to succeed. I already have within myself. Hmm.

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Speaker 2: I received that. It's true.

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Speaker 3: I thought you guys were about to put a spell

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Speaker 3: on me. I didn't know what happened. You guys took

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Speaker 3: a deep breath. At the same time.

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Speaker 1: I was like, Okay, Erica and I are oddly, strangely

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Speaker 1: very connected in some strange way.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I know what she's doing. When she doesn't even

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Speaker 2: tell me, I'd be like, glady she be you know.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my god, this bitch is in my head.

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Speaker 2: I was like, I can't not tell her. And then

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Speaker 2: she's like I already knew. Get on on my burn.

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Speaker 2: Also our drop box, I know, because we have a

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Speaker 2: shared drop box, and the bitch doesn't know how to

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Speaker 2: disconnect her personal photos from the dropbox, so I'll be

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Speaker 2: seeing all her shait. I'd be like, girl, I don't

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Speaker 2: need to know.

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Speaker 3: I didn't need to see that.

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Speaker 1: Then she screenshots them and send them to me randomly.

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Speaker 1: It's like, I'm like, you didn't need to screenshot it.

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Speaker 1: I knew what was in there. Just verbalize it, bitch,

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Speaker 1: nowhere sding in the dropbox?

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Speaker 2: Got it? What a Oh? I'm like, what's you remember?

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Speaker 2: You know. I'm not good with these abbreviations. The other day,

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Speaker 2: she kept talking like she shared something with me, and

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Speaker 2: someone kept putting, like, y T.

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Speaker 1: Why it's from the internet. I just learned, And I

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Speaker 1: was like, what the fuck is why T? No, it's

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Speaker 1: w y T. She didn't know it w y T

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Speaker 1: S and then P I P W It.

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Speaker 2: Was just y T, bitch, it's white white.

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Speaker 3: That yeah, but I would only know if it was

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Speaker 3: in context. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I don't understand why they developed y T and then

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Speaker 1: they put P I P O for people. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: why are we not spelling out white people? Why does

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Speaker 1: it have to be to free?

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Speaker 3: Sometimes are just being.

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Speaker 1: Lazy secret I think white people know. She kept saying

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Speaker 1: he like in this text, and like I kept saying

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Speaker 1: why T, And I was like, what the fuck are

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Speaker 1: we talking about? She was like our friend was talking

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Speaker 1: about a guy and she's like, yeah, he's hit T

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Speaker 1: and he just he wants to go Dutch everywhere. I

295
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Speaker 1: don't know why he was, why she had anything to

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Speaker 1: do with it. I'm going Dutch, but Dutch.

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Speaker 3: You don't know what that is? Split what I've never

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Speaker 3: heard anyone say splits You want to go split sees.

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Speaker 1: No, I'm just wondering if that's what it is, Like,

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Speaker 1: I gotta get it for the bitch that says res

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Speaker 1: She's like. I was like, yeah, this guy text me

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Speaker 1: and was like, yeah, I made her res. I was like,

303
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Speaker 1: how white?

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Speaker 2: She was like, bitch, I'm from the valley. Say like,

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00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:22,520
Speaker 2: I'm a valley girl, like a reservation. Yes, like a resie.

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Speaker 1: Who says that, like, oh, don't wear a girl made

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Speaker 1: the reds made the rest. No, the same bitch that

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00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:30,320
Speaker 1: says loul, I say lol for lool and then she

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00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:35,360
Speaker 1: was like, lol, I hate it and said saying lol,

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Speaker 1: I say Lou. This forty six some second conversation about

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00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:47,360
Speaker 1: abbreviations we don't understand from the internet. No, but when

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00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:50,240
Speaker 1: I first read white People, I was like, what.

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Speaker 2: Peep what?

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, white people.

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Speaker 2: It's like a minute, now I know I am never.

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Speaker 1: I'm still I'm not sure why we have to use

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00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:02,040
Speaker 1: it in code.

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Speaker 3: You guys, I think that I don't think it's a

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Speaker 3: good code.

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Speaker 2: I think they know pretty obvious.

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Speaker 1: Well, apparently it's not like black people like you. It's

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Speaker 1: black b lkls Q.

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Speaker 2: I don't be BLX.

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Speaker 1: You know, white people can't do anything. They can't do

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Speaker 1: anything to us. We'll go crazy. We get to have bet,

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Speaker 1: but they can't have anything. Now you had slavery, So

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Speaker 1: shut the fuck up. I'm joking, but I know I

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Speaker 1: make David so uncomfortable.

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Speaker 2: I love you, David.

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Speaker 1: It's not fun if we don't talk about it and

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Speaker 1: joke about it.

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Speaker 2: He's like respect anyway. Sorry, all this white people talk

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Speaker 2: black to momming. Back to today's affirmation, you have everything

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Speaker 2: you need inside of you. Oh right, I do believe that.

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Speaker 2: I believe that, although I think I sometimes you forget,

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Speaker 2: especially in the age of social media, and like looking

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00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:00,520
Speaker 2: on the GRAM, you be thinking and you need a

338
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:02,080
Speaker 2: lot of shit. I'd be like, do I need that

339
00:16:02,120 --> 00:16:03,880
Speaker 2: Louis bag I can't afford it. But she had it,

340
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,640
Speaker 2: and she looked cute and it looks like she needed it.

341
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Speaker 2: Why don't I have it? They have a yacht. Why

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00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:09,080
Speaker 2: do I have a yacht and a man? Fuck?

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00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:13,160
Speaker 1: That's what I think, mostly on Sierra's page because she's

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Speaker 1: triggering as fun her and Russell.

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00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:19,800
Speaker 3: Oh they really are in Italy. I was like, you're

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00:16:19,880 --> 00:16:24,320
Speaker 3: right on the boat. Wow, No, it's Lori Harvey and

347
00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:26,440
Speaker 3: what's his name? I don't even know. I used to

348
00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:28,120
Speaker 3: be in love with him, but now he's just what's

349
00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:29,840
Speaker 3: his name of Michael?

350
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Speaker 2: Michael.

351
00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:31,600
Speaker 3: I don't even like to say his name.

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00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,760
Speaker 2: I'm glad he's finally, you know, this dating black woman.

353
00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:35,600
Speaker 2: I'm proud of him.

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Speaker 3: Oh, because he was on that boat that time with

355
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:38,680
Speaker 3: that it.

356
00:16:38,760 --> 00:16:40,040
Speaker 2: Was on many boats.

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Speaker 1: He doesn't he's they're cute.

358
00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:45,000
Speaker 3: They're so cute. But it's like if they ever break up,

359
00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:47,320
Speaker 3: who could follow Lori Harvey.

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00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:49,200
Speaker 2: That's what I say. Like, we had a rant a

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Speaker 2: few weeks ago. I don't know when it was. What

362
00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:52,320
Speaker 2: was it, I don't know. Last week's episode and I

363
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:54,320
Speaker 2: was talking about we pulled a card, and I was

364
00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:56,200
Speaker 2: talking about this one girl who I follow on social

365
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Speaker 2: media who like is always posting her man and like

366
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Speaker 2: she has I had never had a man, and now

367
00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:03,520
Speaker 2: like won't stop posting him. And I'm like, girl, if

368
00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:04,600
Speaker 2: y'all break up, like.

369
00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:06,639
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's why you can't, You're gonna have.

370
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:08,320
Speaker 2: To go through your whole feed and delete.

371
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:10,600
Speaker 3: You gotta like sprinkle him here and there.

372
00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:12,000
Speaker 2: You can't leave it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't do posting, and because I don't really

374
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Speaker 1: feel like going back to weed out, like I've been

375
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:17,879
Speaker 1: broke up with a baby daddy for four years. I

376
00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:19,680
Speaker 1: went back to my shit. I was like, why have

377
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:21,120
Speaker 1: I not deleted some of this shit?

378
00:17:21,720 --> 00:17:24,119
Speaker 2: Well? You know you know what my I hold. I

379
00:17:24,119 --> 00:17:26,959
Speaker 2: wrote a whole poem about my beef with you know,

380
00:17:27,119 --> 00:17:29,480
Speaker 2: my ex not posting me. But I've come a long way.

381
00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,520
Speaker 2: I don't care anymore. But back way when when I

382
00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:33,280
Speaker 2: was twenty four, it would irritate me.

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00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:36,080
Speaker 1: But did it make you feel a little special, Like

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00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:38,920
Speaker 1: like now if you're dating someone and they posted you, like, yeah.

385
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:41,320
Speaker 2: No, because my axe is from last year during COVID

386
00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:43,600
Speaker 2: my practice relationship. Oh god, he took it to he

387
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:45,600
Speaker 2: posted it. He would post me all the time and

388
00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:48,120
Speaker 2: I'd be so uncomfortable. And I know he was doing

389
00:17:48,119 --> 00:17:49,600
Speaker 2: it because like he wanted me to post him, and

390
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:51,080
Speaker 2: I was like, this is not going to make me

391
00:17:51,119 --> 00:17:53,240
Speaker 2: post you. He tag you.

392
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,840
Speaker 1: You know that's interesting because first of all, social media

393
00:17:55,960 --> 00:17:57,000
Speaker 1: is just interesting in general.

394
00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:58,600
Speaker 2: Because I was looking at your.

395
00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:01,600
Speaker 1: Page before you got her and last night because I'm

396
00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:04,080
Speaker 1: a stalker, and I was like looking at the kids,

397
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:05,840
Speaker 1: I was looking at all your videos. I was laughing,

398
00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:07,960
Speaker 1: and shit, I saw like your switch video with your son?

399
00:18:08,359 --> 00:18:10,159
Speaker 1: And then I was like, where is her husband? She

400
00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:12,080
Speaker 1: looks like sheal have a beautiful life over there. That's

401
00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:14,240
Speaker 1: a beautiful kitchen. Where is her man? Is this her man?

402
00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:17,760
Speaker 2: I'm so I'm so fucking nosey. I'm like, I bet

403
00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:17,960
Speaker 2: she was.

404
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:19,840
Speaker 1: A really cute man. Those killed are cute. Where's the man?

405
00:18:19,840 --> 00:18:20,560
Speaker 2: Where's her husband?

406
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:23,639
Speaker 1: And then she's like deep, I'm like, is this man

407
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:24,680
Speaker 1: or husband? Is that her uncle?

408
00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:25,080
Speaker 2: I don't know?

409
00:18:26,440 --> 00:18:29,399
Speaker 1: Oh God, I'm just like the lies of the Internet.

410
00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:32,560
Speaker 1: And then Eric's like, she's getting a divorce. I'm like, ah,

411
00:18:32,760 --> 00:18:33,760
Speaker 1: did you take him off?

412
00:18:34,119 --> 00:18:34,199
Speaker 3: No?

413
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:36,200
Speaker 1: Maybe that wasn't your uncle that I saw.

414
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:38,320
Speaker 3: It's probably my dad. If it was just a video,

415
00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:41,080
Speaker 3: that was my dad. I mean, how do you gonna

416
00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:44,880
Speaker 3: ask her because it's my dad, you know. But other

417
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:49,520
Speaker 3: people when I post him, my friends included, you know,

418
00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:51,199
Speaker 3: they get disrespectful.

419
00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:52,840
Speaker 2: I think you're doing it on Oh.

420
00:18:54,359 --> 00:19:00,600
Speaker 1: He is fine, I see daddy, Yeah, yep you do.

421
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:01,120
Speaker 4: Yeah.

422
00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:03,360
Speaker 2: Oh I thought she was picking up her phone. I'm

423
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:05,720
Speaker 2: out because Teresa's friend is here too, and she's naughty

424
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:08,359
Speaker 2: outside of look at house like that was her daddy?

425
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:12,000
Speaker 3: Right? Okay, Yeah, it looks like you, Yeah, well I

426
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:15,919
Speaker 3: love you. Oh thanks. I think you should sprinkle people

427
00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:18,200
Speaker 3: in here and there. But I feel like, I mean,

428
00:19:18,359 --> 00:19:22,040
Speaker 3: I was getting separated for I've been separated now for

429
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,560
Speaker 3: a year, but I just announced it two months ago

430
00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:27,080
Speaker 3: because people are like, why are you doing this by yourself?

431
00:19:27,119 --> 00:19:28,800
Speaker 3: Why are you doing I was like doing you know,

432
00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:31,480
Speaker 3: which I love, like building shit, doing stuff, but they're like,

433
00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:33,440
Speaker 3: and nobody gonna help. I'm like posting videos and me

434
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:35,280
Speaker 3: looking stupid trying to carry a piece of wood like

435
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:38,240
Speaker 3: I could fucking do on myself, on you. And when

436
00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:40,800
Speaker 3: I posted it, everybody was like what you are? And

437
00:19:40,840 --> 00:19:44,080
Speaker 3: I feel like for me, I'm so open about my

438
00:19:44,119 --> 00:19:45,960
Speaker 3: life that there are certain parts that I do want

439
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:47,720
Speaker 3: to be able to have control of, and with that,

440
00:19:48,119 --> 00:19:50,040
Speaker 3: I could take my time. You know, when I was

441
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:52,320
Speaker 3: ready to share that I was getting a divorce and

442
00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:54,760
Speaker 3: you know, all of that stuff. And now, you know,

443
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:57,080
Speaker 3: people probably think I'm like wilding out because I'm like

444
00:19:57,119 --> 00:20:00,520
Speaker 3: out all the time. I'd be posting myself and kinis

445
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:02,879
Speaker 3: and this and that, which was never a thing for me.

446
00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:06,000
Speaker 3: But it's like, no, I mean, it's been a year now,

447
00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:08,080
Speaker 3: I'm ready to start. Well, I don't know if I'm

448
00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:10,720
Speaker 3: ready to start dating, I don't know. It has to

449
00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:12,240
Speaker 3: be somebody who like knocks my stick.

450
00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:14,600
Speaker 2: How long were you guys together? For eleven years so

451
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:16,239
Speaker 2: most of I mean, I don't know hold you are,

452
00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:19,479
Speaker 2: but for probably most of your adult life essentially like

453
00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:23,080
Speaker 2: with third twenty three to Yeah, you've had a lot

454
00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:23,840
Speaker 2: of experiences.

455
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,000
Speaker 1: So you had like a very young marriage as a

456
00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,040
Speaker 1: single mom, you did your thing, dated a little bit,

457
00:20:28,040 --> 00:20:30,640
Speaker 1: and then you got married, and it's like, obviously any

458
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:33,360
Speaker 1: marriage is serious, and a serious marriage like, yeah, this

459
00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:36,080
Speaker 1: was my serious this was my for real, for real marriage,

460
00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:40,359
Speaker 1: and like obviously there's different like how you act hopefully

461
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:43,000
Speaker 1: if you're not me in a relationship and when you're single,

462
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:44,760
Speaker 1: it is different. But like even you're saying like now

463
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:48,040
Speaker 1: I'm posting a bikinis, was that an issue in your marriage?

464
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,160
Speaker 3: Like, no, I think that was with me. So when

465
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,560
Speaker 3: I got pregnant with CJ, like I had stretch marks

466
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:55,399
Speaker 3: all over and I was like super about my stomach

467
00:20:55,520 --> 00:20:58,440
Speaker 3: before you know, I was young, I'm like, bitch, hello,

468
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:01,320
Speaker 3: and then he fucked it up. No, no, he's not

469
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,720
Speaker 3: gonna listen to this, but it was I.

470
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:05,119
Speaker 2: Was like, what the hell he's in.

471
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:07,919
Speaker 3: I was like, what the fuck. So for a while

472
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:12,040
Speaker 3: and then my mistake was dating this guy right before

473
00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:18,400
Speaker 3: see Ashton's dad, who was the fucking worst. I never

474
00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:20,600
Speaker 3: have used the term like that. I hate somebody, but

475
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:22,840
Speaker 3: still I have to shake it. I really can't stand him,

476
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:25,560
Speaker 3: but he would say shit. I actually wrote a blog

477
00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:26,920
Speaker 3: post about how it broke up with him. It was

478
00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:28,480
Speaker 3: the most glorious breakup.

479
00:21:28,160 --> 00:21:28,760
Speaker 2: Of my life.

480
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:31,800
Speaker 3: He was a trust fun baby, so everything he thought

481
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:33,480
Speaker 3: he could buy, and I knew I was gonna break

482
00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:34,960
Speaker 3: up with him. I'm like, you're full of shit. He's

483
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,880
Speaker 3: like he was like verbally abusive. People say like shit,

484
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:39,159
Speaker 3: that was just like yo, why. One of the things

485
00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:41,560
Speaker 3: was like, who's gonna want you? You're divorcing your stretch

486
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,639
Speaker 3: marks and he would say he And I was like,

487
00:21:43,680 --> 00:21:44,920
Speaker 3: what the fuck? So I knew I want to break

488
00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:47,040
Speaker 3: up with him, but my birthday party was coming up.

489
00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:50,040
Speaker 3: My birthday and my friends was like, uh uh, he's

490
00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:52,359
Speaker 3: throwing you this huge party. You need to have the

491
00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:54,719
Speaker 3: party and then break up. And I'm like, you know what,

492
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:58,120
Speaker 3: You're right, You're right. So he got me my whole outfit,

493
00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:00,879
Speaker 3: he got me like everything. We went to dinner first,

494
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:03,399
Speaker 3: and then we had at that point, what was the

495
00:22:03,440 --> 00:22:06,080
Speaker 3: pink champagne that everybody was pressed over when we were young,

496
00:22:06,119 --> 00:22:11,119
Speaker 3: when we were like, no, but one the pink? Was

497
00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:11,760
Speaker 3: it just rosette?

498
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:12,080
Speaker 2: Is it just?

499
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:14,760
Speaker 3: No? It wasn't. I don't know what it was. But

500
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:17,400
Speaker 3: he eached I don't remember, but he got us each

501
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:19,520
Speaker 3: two bottles. We were like fucked up in the club.

502
00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:21,360
Speaker 3: You know. I'm like, I think I was twenty three.

503
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,960
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, yes, bitch, blah blah blah whatever whatever.

504
00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:26,200
Speaker 3: And then the next day we went out to eat

505
00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:29,400
Speaker 3: with my family. And I'm very good at talking about

506
00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:31,119
Speaker 3: people and making it a joke. It's not something that

507
00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:33,439
Speaker 3: I'm proud of. But if you're a bad person, if

508
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,679
Speaker 3: you're a bully's my favorite thing to do. And so

509
00:22:35,720 --> 00:22:37,159
Speaker 3: all of a sudden, I just started lighting up at

510
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:38,880
Speaker 3: the table and all my family is looking like what

511
00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:41,439
Speaker 3: the fuck is going on? And he was getting so mad.

512
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:43,760
Speaker 3: And then he was like, I'm ready to go back,

513
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:45,920
Speaker 3: and I was like, oh, all right, because he came

514
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:47,840
Speaker 3: from out of town. So he went back to the

515
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:49,359
Speaker 3: hotel room. I got my stuff and he's like, what

516
00:22:49,359 --> 00:22:51,560
Speaker 3: are you doing. I was like, oh, we're done, and

517
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:53,200
Speaker 3: he was like, wait, but we just had the party.

518
00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:55,600
Speaker 3: I know, think you goodbye, and I like walked out

519
00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:57,439
Speaker 3: and left and it was like for me, I just

520
00:22:57,480 --> 00:23:00,399
Speaker 3: remember walking out like I'm a boss ass bit like

521
00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 3: my bag, like thank you, and it was the greatest

522
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:04,720
Speaker 3: thing ever because I was like, you're full of shit

523
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:06,439
Speaker 3: and you just pay all this money for me to

524
00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:09,080
Speaker 3: have the most amazing time with my friends and thank

525
00:23:09,119 --> 00:23:12,240
Speaker 3: you for your services, and that is a Virgo shit.

526
00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:15,760
Speaker 2: That is a Virgo ass shit calculating yes.

527
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:16,600
Speaker 1: I know I'll do it.

528
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 2: After that thank you, I've already disconnected it.

529
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:22,320
Speaker 3: It was. It was very well timed and plans and

530
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:24,239
Speaker 3: I didn't start talking about hiuntil I was done with

531
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:27,159
Speaker 3: my food because I knew how it was going to

532
00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:28,840
Speaker 3: go down and my food was delicious.

533
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:32,760
Speaker 2: So yes, I think, like I just men that talk

534
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 2: about a woman's body in that way, but will but

535
00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:37,600
Speaker 2: we'll lay down with you and have no problem, Like

536
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:40,160
Speaker 2: it's just so yeah, just.

537
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 1: Be littling and disrespecting women to make yourself feel better

538
00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:47,880
Speaker 1: or like it's just an insecure act overall, like you're.

539
00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:49,320
Speaker 2: A bitch ass and I guess, but it.

540
00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:51,800
Speaker 3: Stuck with me for a very long time. You know,

541
00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:54,760
Speaker 3: it really made me, and society makes it makes you

542
00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:57,200
Speaker 3: have a real beef with society if you can't tell

543
00:23:57,440 --> 00:23:59,480
Speaker 3: with the way they make moms feel. But it makes

544
00:23:59,520 --> 00:24:02,600
Speaker 3: you feel like stretch marks are like hideous, it's ugly,

545
00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:06,240
Speaker 3: and it's like ninety percent of women have stretch marks,

546
00:24:06,240 --> 00:24:08,480
Speaker 3: regardless of you had a baby or that, and all

547
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:11,200
Speaker 3: women once our stomach's or if your stomach gets messed

548
00:24:11,240 --> 00:24:12,919
Speaker 3: up after a baby, it's like cover it up. You

549
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:15,280
Speaker 3: can't show it, show it. You can't show it anymore.

550
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:17,639
Speaker 3: You know, you can't. You could have been if you

551
00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:19,959
Speaker 3: get pregnant at twenty one, you're taking body shots off

552
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:22,239
Speaker 3: of somebody doing this, and then you get pregnant, and

553
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:23,720
Speaker 3: then as soon as the baby comes out, it's like,

554
00:24:23,720 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 3: well you can't do that.

555
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:25,040
Speaker 2: That's true.

556
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:27,400
Speaker 3: You can't have you can't have no more fun. It's

557
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:30,919
Speaker 3: like you get shoved in this box. And I hate that.

558
00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:32,760
Speaker 1: That's what that's my Also my question to you is

559
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:35,760
Speaker 1: like I think it's sometimes even harder when you're young,

560
00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:38,360
Speaker 1: and first of all, you're already being like shamed for

561
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:41,280
Speaker 1: having a baby young, and then there's all these expectation

562
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:44,280
Speaker 1: of you. You know, you're getting married, you're getting divorced,

563
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:46,720
Speaker 1: your body changes. I think when you are young mom,

564
00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:50,160
Speaker 1: you have even more pressure to act in a way

565
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:53,000
Speaker 1: and to not go out and not act your age

566
00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:54,960
Speaker 1: and like forget who you are, because it's like if

567
00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:58,320
Speaker 1: you do anything out of the scope of that, everyone is.

568
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:01,040
Speaker 3: Like totally, yep, I told you exactly.

569
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:02,200
Speaker 1: I told you that you were that.

570
00:25:03,680 --> 00:25:04,120
Speaker 2: Exactly.

571
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:06,760
Speaker 1: They can't wait, like as a grown ass woman, as

572
00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:10,080
Speaker 1: a twenty seven year old woman, twenty six year old women, people, friends,

573
00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:12,800
Speaker 1: family members couldn't wait to kind of like jump down

574
00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:15,320
Speaker 1: what they thought you weren't doing motherly enough. So like,

575
00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:18,879
Speaker 1: how did you even find enough? Like I mean, obviously

576
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:20,920
Speaker 1: you're committed. You're like, bitch, I'm about to live this life,

577
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:23,200
Speaker 1: which I commend because I'm sure you got a lot

578
00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:26,160
Speaker 1: of judgment. Like how did you deal with that judgment?

579
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:29,040
Speaker 1: And like, you know, being a single mom and still

580
00:25:29,080 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 1: remembering who you were that young with everybody else's I'm

581
00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:33,800
Speaker 1: sure negative.

582
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:37,439
Speaker 3: Oh well back then, I mean I was still in

583
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:41,760
Speaker 3: their face trying to be like oh no, not doing anything,

584
00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:46,320
Speaker 3: and social media was just becoming a thing, you know,

585
00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:48,480
Speaker 3: that was like I don't know, like ten years ago,

586
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:50,920
Speaker 3: So it was like it wasn't there weren't any stories.

587
00:25:50,960 --> 00:25:53,480
Speaker 3: You weren't really posting all the crazy shit you were doing.

588
00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:55,960
Speaker 3: You could really stage your life, what I mean, you

589
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:58,600
Speaker 3: still can, but you could stage it how you wanted

590
00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:00,520
Speaker 3: people to see it. So I just did didn't post

591
00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:02,159
Speaker 3: that part of me, and my family didn't know, you

592
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:03,520
Speaker 3: know they, I mean my mom would know that.

593
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:05,560
Speaker 2: I would go out. So there was still shame around

594
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:09,720
Speaker 2: it though, But yeah, for sure, for sure fully Yeah,

595
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:11,760
Speaker 2: double life. I feel like a lot of moms do that.

596
00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:14,639
Speaker 2: They feel like they have to live these absolutely life

597
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:16,080
Speaker 2: like I can't do this, I can't do that, and

598
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:18,399
Speaker 2: then also living in that double life then meeting people

599
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:21,280
Speaker 2: and abusers that people will disrespect you and like make

600
00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:23,640
Speaker 2: you feel bad. Yeah, I have a question like how

601
00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:26,879
Speaker 2: did you because I think that's something that like the

602
00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:29,719
Speaker 2: world doesn't prepare you for, like the way your body

603
00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:33,479
Speaker 2: changes after pregnancy and like it affects everyone differently, and

604
00:26:33,520 --> 00:26:35,680
Speaker 2: like learning how to love your body again, like, oh,

605
00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:37,760
Speaker 2: it fucked me up. How do you feel like you've

606
00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:39,440
Speaker 2: come to this point where.

607
00:26:39,400 --> 00:26:40,680
Speaker 3: I didn't until.

608
00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:45,879
Speaker 2: Oh gosh's so it's like confidence is sexy, you know

609
00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:48,280
Speaker 2: what I mean? Like, and I think thankfully, I think,

610
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:50,840
Speaker 2: you know, thanks to social media, there's a lot of shaming,

611
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,760
Speaker 2: but there is an opportunity to to like empower yeah

612
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:55,640
Speaker 2: and be like, okay, look, you know.

613
00:26:55,920 --> 00:26:58,199
Speaker 3: Well, I mean I think it took a while for me.

614
00:26:58,359 --> 00:27:00,800
Speaker 3: Not until I hit thirty was I like, I don't

615
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,639
Speaker 3: give a fuck, Like I cannot keep on living for

616
00:27:03,760 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 3: everybody else. And I realized my entire life, that's what

617
00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:08,880
Speaker 3: I've done. I don't even know who I am because

618
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:11,760
Speaker 3: I've changed myself so much to be what everybody else

619
00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:13,320
Speaker 3: wants me to be. So that's when I started the

620
00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:15,920
Speaker 3: Funny Mama and I'm like, y'all gonna see how much

621
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,600
Speaker 3: I curse how much my kids get on my nerves.

622
00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:20,959
Speaker 3: I love them, but they get on my fucking nerves

623
00:27:21,359 --> 00:27:24,760
Speaker 3: how much. Like I just wanted to normalize because I

624
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:28,800
Speaker 3: had postpartum depression after my second son, and it was

625
00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 3: because everything I was seeing on social media when people

626
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:34,160
Speaker 3: were having their kids and it was like they snapped

627
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:38,000
Speaker 3: back or they had like you know, everything was fantastic

628
00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 3: and they just were fine. I had to have a

629
00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:43,679
Speaker 3: C section, and I was like, fucking postpartum depression was

630
00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:46,560
Speaker 3: fucking me up. And I was like, I need to

631
00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:50,480
Speaker 3: know that there's other mothers out there that don't have

632
00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:54,840
Speaker 3: their shit together. And so that's when I started kindie

633
00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:57,480
Speaker 3: kind of changing and I say it all the time.

634
00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:01,240
Speaker 3: My followers really helped me get out of it. So

635
00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:03,200
Speaker 3: then I felt like, Okay, well, I'm gonna just be

636
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 3: honest about everything that has happened to me as a

637
00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:09,280
Speaker 3: mom and as a woman, because I want to be

638
00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:12,440
Speaker 3: able to open up the conversation for things that nobody

639
00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:15,160
Speaker 3: wants to talk about. So I always like my Christmas

640
00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:17,639
Speaker 3: pictures that I always post to the kids, It's always

641
00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:20,280
Speaker 3: like a terrible picture because it's the truth. You know,

642
00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:22,640
Speaker 3: you have to take of your kids, like forty pictures

643
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:24,640
Speaker 3: before you can get one, and it's like, no, this

644
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:27,639
Speaker 3: is the reality of it. So I also feel like

645
00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:30,960
Speaker 3: the whole bathing suit thing, that was something that took

646
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:33,280
Speaker 3: me a long time because I hadn't worn a bathing

647
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:36,679
Speaker 3: suit since before since I was eighteen, like a bikini,

648
00:28:37,359 --> 00:28:40,800
Speaker 3: and I was like, bitch, you do not diet this

649
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:44,400
Speaker 3: much for you to not show off your body like

650
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,480
Speaker 3: you don't And if majority of the other women here

651
00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:49,440
Speaker 3: have stretch marks that they're not trying to show. I

652
00:28:49,480 --> 00:28:52,000
Speaker 3: wish they would judge me for having mine out, So

653
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:55,440
Speaker 3: then I did, and it was it was super super empowering.

654
00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:56,600
Speaker 3: I did it for the first time when I just

655
00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,440
Speaker 3: went to Mexico, like I don't know, it was like

656
00:28:59,480 --> 00:29:02,280
Speaker 3: a month ago, two months ago. And the first day

657
00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:04,440
Speaker 3: I was like, everybody's looking at me. Everybody but nobody

658
00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:07,560
Speaker 3: was looking at me. Nobody was And then I was like, Okay,

659
00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:09,120
Speaker 3: I'm gonna start doing this more. And then I said,

660
00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:12,040
Speaker 3: I'm only buying crop tops this whole summer. Like it

661
00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:15,200
Speaker 3: was like me just being like I need to get

662
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,640
Speaker 3: outside of this comfort zone. And it really is empowering

663
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:21,160
Speaker 3: because it's like I'm finally this is my body. There's

664
00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:23,520
Speaker 3: nothing I can fucking do about it. The stretch marks

665
00:29:23,520 --> 00:29:25,520
Speaker 3: are so high. Even a tell me Tuck wouldn't do shit.

666
00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:29,240
Speaker 3: So you're gonna fucking like it or you know, that's

667
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 3: fuck yourself. I don't care, you know, like this is me.

668
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:33,200
Speaker 2: So yeah.

669
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,480
Speaker 3: So I mean it's been a journey. Like I said,

670
00:29:35,520 --> 00:29:37,840
Speaker 3: I've been a mom for fourteen years, so now at

671
00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:40,280
Speaker 3: the fucking tail end, I'm like, you know what, let

672
00:29:40,280 --> 00:29:41,040
Speaker 3: me accept this shit.

673
00:29:41,880 --> 00:29:45,360
Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, it's such a journey. People don't give

674
00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:49,600
Speaker 1: that enough. Like your body changes, you're literally feeding another human.

675
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:52,560
Speaker 1: If you feel foreign in your own body, it feels

676
00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:55,840
Speaker 1: like and like it's I feel alien. Like I've been

677
00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:57,960
Speaker 1: like peeing on myself. I peel myself.

678
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:01,080
Speaker 3: I never went through that, but everyone talks about it.

679
00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:04,160
Speaker 2: I know it's just recent. Like I'm like here, I

680
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:06,320
Speaker 2: am thinking I dodged it. I'm like, my child's six,

681
00:30:06,360 --> 00:30:08,520
Speaker 2: I'm my busy. Still I'm not peeing on myself. And

682
00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 2: then like one day I was like in Target, I

683
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:13,240
Speaker 2: was like, am I peeing? Like what the fuck is

684
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:13,760
Speaker 2: going on?

685
00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 1: Like I usually pee like at least this much before

686
00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:18,200
Speaker 1: I make it to the toilet, like my parents are

687
00:30:18,240 --> 00:30:21,080
Speaker 1: like at least this wet. I'm like, this is literally

688
00:30:21,080 --> 00:30:21,760
Speaker 1: there's nothing I can do.

689
00:30:21,960 --> 00:30:23,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's very common.

690
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:25,479
Speaker 1: I've turned thirty three. And then I'm like, what the

691
00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:28,040
Speaker 1: fuck is happening. It's I always have a very urgent

692
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:29,920
Speaker 1: for ladder, Like I pee outside all the time, but

693
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:31,720
Speaker 1: to the point like I'll be right at the toilet

694
00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:33,640
Speaker 1: and it's just like a little stream down my leg.

695
00:30:34,840 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 1: I'm an old lady.

696
00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 3: But people don't talk about it. No, this should be told,

697
00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:39,240
Speaker 3: it should be spoken.

698
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:41,520
Speaker 2: About it like it is like it's a muscle, Like

699
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:44,560
Speaker 2: just like skin is an organ. Everything is like everything

700
00:30:44,640 --> 00:30:49,480
Speaker 2: reacts differently, you know, and everyone's journey in their body

701
00:30:49,520 --> 00:30:51,160
Speaker 2: post pregnancy is different.

702
00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:54,840
Speaker 3: You know.

703
00:30:55,280 --> 00:30:59,360
Speaker 2: I love the giving head, but I literally hate this semen.

704
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:02,800
Speaker 2: I hate swallowing. It doesn't taste good. That's why you

705
00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:05,400
Speaker 2: guys know we've talked about taste and the reviews are in.

706
00:31:05,720 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 2: I've been getting hit up by all of you guys

707
00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:12,920
Speaker 2: that have gotten taste and taste changes. Swallowing lives.

708
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:16,600
Speaker 1: Taste is a game changer for sure. It makes me

709
00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:19,960
Speaker 1: feel so much better about swallowing the semen. After the

710
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:21,800
Speaker 1: job is done, I feel like a real pro.

711
00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:24,959
Speaker 2: Also, it makes you taste better. It's packed with premium

712
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:27,840
Speaker 2: natural ingredients. Taste is the organic vitamin that works with

713
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:31,040
Speaker 2: your natural pH levels to improve the taste and smell

714
00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:34,080
Speaker 2: of bodily secretions for him and her. Not only that,

715
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 2: it's black owned, it's woman owned. Shout out to Brittany Nicole.

716
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:41,320
Speaker 2: She's bombed. She's a mom, and the shit works. It

717
00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:42,400
Speaker 2: really really works.

718
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:42,680
Speaker 4: You know.

719
00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:44,920
Speaker 2: Me and Mila, we don't talk about brands unless we

720
00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:47,400
Speaker 2: really fuck with them and taste Vitamins is one of

721
00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:49,400
Speaker 2: those brands that just it works.

722
00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 1: It's a magic potion your head game has waiting for.

723
00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 2: So all you have to do is take two capsules

724
00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:57,440
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725
00:31:57,440 --> 00:32:01,080
Speaker 2: capsules per day monthly for even more play leasurable experience

726
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:05,800
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727
00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:09,600
Speaker 2: percent off, so make sure you go to Taste Vita Inc.

728
00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:13,560
Speaker 2: Dot com and use bad choices at checkout. That's t

729
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:16,520
Speaker 2: A S T E v I T A I n

730
00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:24,040
Speaker 2: C dot com and use bad choices at checkout. You know,

731
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:25,880
Speaker 2: it's just I don't know. I feel like there's a

732
00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:28,560
Speaker 2: lot of shame around it. Especially I think there's more

733
00:32:28,600 --> 00:32:32,720
Speaker 2: shame that we feel than really is maybe even perceived, because,

734
00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:34,840
Speaker 2: like you said, like walking outside, no one even was.

735
00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:37,440
Speaker 3: Like but you know what, I think. It's also like

736
00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:40,920
Speaker 3: marketing and shit, it is crazy to me how nobody

737
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 3: really targets moms, because if you think about it, moms

738
00:32:45,120 --> 00:32:48,200
Speaker 3: are in control of everything. I'm buying stuff to clean,

739
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:51,160
Speaker 3: to cook, the stuff for the kids. If you're married

740
00:32:51,240 --> 00:32:53,720
Speaker 3: or you're with somebody, this shit for him, you know,

741
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:57,320
Speaker 3: this stuff for myself, All of these things the mom

742
00:32:57,440 --> 00:33:00,520
Speaker 3: is literally at the center of it, but you choose

743
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:04,920
Speaker 3: to go after younger kids who don't got no fucking money.

744
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:10,160
Speaker 3: It's like yeah, and it's like we fucking created life,

745
00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:13,440
Speaker 3: Like that's a pretty big deal. Like it's not like

746
00:33:12,880 --> 00:33:16,480
Speaker 3: it's not an easy thing to do, created the population.

747
00:33:16,960 --> 00:33:19,920
Speaker 2: Just had this conversation with our business partner.

748
00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:22,320
Speaker 1: He was like, but you couldn't do it without the nut,

749
00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:25,960
Speaker 1: You couldn't do it. What about you couldn't do shit

750
00:33:26,040 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 1: without it?

751
00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:31,080
Speaker 3: I was like, Oh, it's literally the least you could do,

752
00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 3: literally the least you can do exactly. And then what

753
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:38,800
Speaker 3: and then what what do you do? Then?

754
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:43,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's moms matter. The world needs to value moms

755
00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:44,200
Speaker 1: way more.

756
00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:47,480
Speaker 3: And it's no reason why we created life. And now

757
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:49,680
Speaker 3: you feel, Lizzo, you can tell me what I should

758
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:52,640
Speaker 3: or shouldn't do. I should be able to do whatever

759
00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:55,320
Speaker 3: the fuck I want to do, because I'm also now

760
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:58,160
Speaker 3: raising these kids to be the best that they can

761
00:33:58,200 --> 00:34:01,360
Speaker 3: be so they're not murderers or rape this while trying

762
00:34:01,360 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 3: to get my ship together, while trying to provide, while

763
00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 3: trying to be a good person, go to therapy so

764
00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:11,200
Speaker 3: that I don't turn into a murderer, myself like, Hello,

765
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:12,719
Speaker 3: I'm fucking stressed.

766
00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:20,400
Speaker 1: Therapy, free drinks like yes, Friday, every bar like this

767
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:21,400
Speaker 1: should be standard.

768
00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:25,440
Speaker 3: Hello, but we are treated like do.

769
00:34:25,440 --> 00:34:26,959
Speaker 1: You want society to be good?

770
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:28,439
Speaker 2: Give moms weed?

771
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:31,040
Speaker 1: Treat moms better, give them it should be free weed,

772
00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:36,600
Speaker 1: medical grade mom weed. Because you're raising children, don't kill them.

773
00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:40,279
Speaker 3: That's it's crazy to me. So I do think that

774
00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:45,439
Speaker 3: it is. We're just devalued. It's I hate it so much.

775
00:34:45,480 --> 00:34:48,560
Speaker 3: So I'm hoping to help to add to the value

776
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:51,200
Speaker 3: of mothers so people will not add, but to show

777
00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:54,720
Speaker 3: you know how much value we offer, because it's bullshit

778
00:34:54,920 --> 00:34:56,880
Speaker 3: that they just push us to the size.

779
00:34:57,719 --> 00:35:01,520
Speaker 2: Okay, speaking of moms mattering and and just the fact

780
00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:04,560
Speaker 2: that we are the motherfucking salt of the earth and

781
00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:10,000
Speaker 2: the population would not exist. Hello, Hello, I just want

782
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:12,799
Speaker 2: to ask you, you know, as a young mom and

783
00:35:12,840 --> 00:35:15,319
Speaker 2: now you know being a parent out for fourteen years,

784
00:35:15,320 --> 00:35:18,879
Speaker 2: what is your biggest lesson that you've learned like through

785
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:21,879
Speaker 2: all of it? Like for me, Like, my question is

786
00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 2: like I always like too, Like I see parents that

787
00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:26,440
Speaker 2: have multiple kids, like they're professional parents, Like does it

788
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:28,279
Speaker 2: get better? Is it easier? Do you figure the shit out?

789
00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:32,600
Speaker 2: Or is it never ending? Oh shit, it doesn't get easier.

790
00:35:33,480 --> 00:35:36,720
Speaker 3: It doesn't, you would think the closer to I'll always

791
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:39,320
Speaker 3: joke and say the finish line, even though it kills

792
00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:41,719
Speaker 3: me to think, like, oh my god, my son is

793
00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:44,360
Speaker 3: really about to be out here. He's fourteen now. He

794
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:47,000
Speaker 3: turns fifteen in November. He started high school next year.

795
00:35:47,480 --> 00:35:49,759
Speaker 3: In four years, he's gonna be able to do well

796
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:54,080
Speaker 3: when you have when Mexican, you never get to do whatever. Yeah,

797
00:35:54,120 --> 00:36:01,400
Speaker 3: my mom is saying it. Really Oh maybe, well hopefully

798
00:36:01,400 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 3: we're not sisters or I have to talk to my dad.

799
00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:05,759
Speaker 3: Oh shit, well no, it's off my mom's side. I

800
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:10,720
Speaker 3: might have to talk about your mom, Rodriguez. That okay, Okay.

801
00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 3: So I think the biggest lesson I think would be

802
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:17,160
Speaker 3: to enjoy your time with your kids, which I love

803
00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:18,359
Speaker 3: my kids. I know I have to say it because

804
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:20,080
Speaker 3: I really be feeling like I'm talking shit about them,

805
00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:24,520
Speaker 3: but I am always a mom, you know, like it's

806
00:36:24,520 --> 00:36:26,799
Speaker 3: like God, to the moment I'm not with them, I

807
00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:29,160
Speaker 3: feel so terrible because it's like part of me is

808
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:32,480
Speaker 3: like you have that mom anxiety, like are they okay?

809
00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:34,160
Speaker 3: And nobody can take care of them like I can

810
00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 3: are they you know whatever. But then the other part

811
00:36:36,239 --> 00:36:37,799
Speaker 3: of me is like, fuck, It's like when you take

812
00:36:37,840 --> 00:36:41,520
Speaker 3: off a bra, you're like, shit, God, I was so

813
00:36:41,640 --> 00:36:43,760
Speaker 3: fucking tired. I didn't even realize I was that tired.

814
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:47,960
Speaker 3: So I think it's enjoying the time with them, even

815
00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:51,719
Speaker 3: though they drive you nuts. Because someone once told me,

816
00:36:51,719 --> 00:36:54,000
Speaker 3: and it fucked me up, you only have eighteen summers

817
00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:57,560
Speaker 3: with your kids. What doesn't that fuck you up?

818
00:36:57,600 --> 00:36:58,759
Speaker 1: Why would you say that?

819
00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:01,279
Speaker 3: It makes you feel so ever since they told me that.

820
00:37:01,320 --> 00:37:03,040
Speaker 3: They told me that when he was probably like ten

821
00:37:03,239 --> 00:37:09,720
Speaker 3: every summer, I'm like, holy oh, yeah, five more summers.

822
00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:12,520
Speaker 1: Nine summers and then maybe when your kids are yeah,

823
00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:16,439
Speaker 1: and then so after this summer, I only have three

824
00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:20,359
Speaker 1: more summers, three more summers, and that's fucking me up.

825
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 3: I know. I'm sorry, but if I heard it, you

826
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:24,560
Speaker 3: guys have to hear it too. It's just you have to.

827
00:37:24,880 --> 00:37:30,600
Speaker 3: But it did eight years, yeah, but summers summers. So

828
00:37:30,719 --> 00:37:33,880
Speaker 3: it did make me feel like at that point, because

829
00:37:33,880 --> 00:37:35,600
Speaker 3: it was a lot of me being like I need

830
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:38,120
Speaker 3: a break from my kids, I was like, Okay, you

831
00:37:38,160 --> 00:37:40,479
Speaker 3: need to learn how to balance this in a healthy way,

832
00:37:40,600 --> 00:37:43,400
Speaker 3: because even though they get on your nerves. You clearly

833
00:37:43,440 --> 00:37:47,200
Speaker 3: love them so much. They're your whole world. They're eighteen now,

834
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 3: and I'm like, what the fuck did I do? But

835
00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:52,360
Speaker 3: then on the flip side, it's also I lost myself

836
00:37:52,360 --> 00:37:55,319
Speaker 3: to motherhood. For a very very long time, all I

837
00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:58,160
Speaker 3: knew was being their mom, and I so much so

838
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:00,879
Speaker 3: that I never went through those twenties of discovering who

839
00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:04,520
Speaker 3: I was and my whole Fuck No, my mom would

840
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:07,160
Speaker 3: never let me. I always had my own money, I

841
00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 3: always had my little secret accounts, all that shit. But

842
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:12,920
Speaker 3: I do feel like, and there's nothing wrong with being

843
00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:14,759
Speaker 3: a stay at home mom. Let me say that there's not,

844
00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:17,719
Speaker 3: but for me, I just, you know, I just feel

845
00:38:17,719 --> 00:38:20,160
Speaker 3: like I have to have my own But I lost

846
00:38:20,160 --> 00:38:23,160
Speaker 3: myself to motherhood and I never discovered who I was

847
00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:26,000
Speaker 3: because for so long in my life growing up, I

848
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:29,320
Speaker 3: don't know why. My whole goal was to be married

849
00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:32,319
Speaker 3: and have kids. That was and there's nothing wrong with that.

850
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:34,880
Speaker 3: But I feel like, once you come to that decision,

851
00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:37,839
Speaker 3: after exploring every single thing else about yourself to make

852
00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 3: sure that there's nothing else that you really want to do,

853
00:38:40,280 --> 00:38:42,719
Speaker 3: I didn't do that. I just was focused on getting married,

854
00:38:42,719 --> 00:38:45,759
Speaker 3: having kids, getting married, having kids. So then I got

855
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:47,719
Speaker 3: married the first time I had kids, and I was

856
00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:50,520
Speaker 3: still like, no, that wasn't right. I got to do

857
00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:53,200
Speaker 3: it again, you know. I went and got married and

858
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:55,399
Speaker 3: had another kid, and then I had my bonus kid too,

859
00:38:55,840 --> 00:38:58,799
Speaker 3: and I was like, there's still why because it was like, okay,

860
00:38:58,880 --> 00:39:01,879
Speaker 3: you got it. What the fuck do I do now?

861
00:39:01,920 --> 00:39:04,680
Speaker 3: And in that did I start to realize, all right, well,

862
00:39:04,760 --> 00:39:06,439
Speaker 3: I need to figure out what the fuck I want

863
00:39:06,480 --> 00:39:09,000
Speaker 3: to do, what I can do. But you know, my

864
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 3: grandparents used to make us do all this crazy shit.

865
00:39:11,320 --> 00:39:13,720
Speaker 3: My mom used to like make us make costumes and shit,

866
00:39:13,760 --> 00:39:16,480
Speaker 3: my grandfather used to make us bullshit, my dad, both

867
00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:18,680
Speaker 3: of my parents are like geniuses. Anything they want to

868
00:39:18,680 --> 00:39:20,719
Speaker 3: do they could fucking do. They're most creative people in

869
00:39:20,719 --> 00:39:23,359
Speaker 3: the world. And I grew up not only watching them

870
00:39:23,400 --> 00:39:26,080
Speaker 3: do these things, but doing it with them. But never

871
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:28,440
Speaker 3: did I ever think that I could do those things

872
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:31,200
Speaker 3: because I'm just a mom, you know, like in my mind,

873
00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:33,439
Speaker 3: society fucking got to me. I'm like, I'm just a mom.

874
00:39:33,800 --> 00:39:36,359
Speaker 3: So I started like exploring all of these things, and

875
00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:40,400
Speaker 3: in that not only discovered who I am, but it

876
00:39:40,480 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 3: also opened up my eyes to shit that was going

877
00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:47,200
Speaker 3: on in my marriage. It also made me realize you

878
00:39:47,239 --> 00:39:49,600
Speaker 3: are a completely different person than you even thought you were,

879
00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:53,320
Speaker 3: and what you want and what you will accept from people.

880
00:39:54,080 --> 00:39:57,080
Speaker 3: But it was scary as fuck because it also is like,

881
00:39:57,080 --> 00:39:59,560
Speaker 3: like you were saying, or you're so comfortable in something,

882
00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:02,600
Speaker 3: and this is who you are and this is what

883
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:04,680
Speaker 3: I've been doing and it works. Am I happy?

884
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:05,040
Speaker 2: No?

885
00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:08,360
Speaker 3: But are my kids thriving? And I you know whatever?

886
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:11,279
Speaker 3: And all of a sudden, I was just like, fuck it,

887
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:13,600
Speaker 3: this isn't what I want. I mean, there was plenty

888
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:16,600
Speaker 3: of reasons why I got a divorced in trusting, but

889
00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 3: it was a thing of like, Okay, now I'm for

890
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:22,040
Speaker 3: the first time in a very long time, I'm so

891
00:40:22,080 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 3: excited about life and I'm like, and it's about me,

892
00:40:25,360 --> 00:40:27,320
Speaker 3: not like because I'm having a baby or not because

893
00:40:27,360 --> 00:40:31,040
Speaker 3: I'm planning a wedding or anything. It's like, what the

894
00:40:31,080 --> 00:40:33,319
Speaker 3: fuck am I going to do next? Like here, I

895
00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:37,200
Speaker 3: am finally doing everything to explore me and I really

896
00:40:37,239 --> 00:40:39,560
Speaker 3: fucking like who I am and that shit, it's great.

897
00:40:39,560 --> 00:40:40,760
Speaker 3: It's scary, but it's great.

898
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:43,280
Speaker 1: What were some of the steps you took to find

899
00:40:43,280 --> 00:40:45,040
Speaker 1: that place? I think there's a lot of women who

900
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:47,879
Speaker 1: are in that space, we're like, fuck, who the fuck

901
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:48,160
Speaker 1: am I?

902
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:49,080
Speaker 2: What has happened?

903
00:40:49,160 --> 00:40:51,640
Speaker 1: Where have I you know, like, cause I think that's

904
00:40:51,640 --> 00:40:54,080
Speaker 1: a majority of women. We just want to Like you're like, oh,

905
00:40:54,080 --> 00:40:55,719
Speaker 1: I'm so to have a baby and get married and

906
00:40:55,760 --> 00:40:58,439
Speaker 1: like be like be rich and be happy and clean

907
00:40:58,440 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 1: the house. I thought that for that was like my

908
00:41:00,719 --> 00:41:03,880
Speaker 1: definitely my goal. But like, when you're in that position,

909
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:06,480
Speaker 1: what were some of the things that were the tools

910
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:08,440
Speaker 1: that you used to pull that out of you to say, wait,

911
00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:10,920
Speaker 1: hold on? Are there events that happened? Was there something

912
00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:12,719
Speaker 1: within you that said, like.

913
00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:15,800
Speaker 3: The first thing was not giving a fuck anymore. At thirty,

914
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:19,000
Speaker 3: I literally was like, turn it off. Stop fucking caring

915
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:21,600
Speaker 3: what people think. Even when I started the funny Mama

916
00:41:22,040 --> 00:41:23,680
Speaker 3: and I hope my mom's not watching this and thinks

917
00:41:23,719 --> 00:41:25,680
Speaker 3: that I'm saying this in this way. But my mom

918
00:41:25,719 --> 00:41:27,399
Speaker 3: when I would be like cursing a lot, she wasn't

919
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:29,120
Speaker 3: used to. I still don't curse in front of my parents.

920
00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:32,000
Speaker 3: They just were very strict like that my two other

921
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:34,200
Speaker 3: sisters will, but my mom, I said, damn in front

922
00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:35,920
Speaker 3: of her. She threw a fucking grapefruit at me. I

923
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:40,719
Speaker 3: was like ma, the what it? It slipped? So but

924
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:42,920
Speaker 3: you know on my page, I'm like, if you follow me,

925
00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:45,359
Speaker 3: this is how I really talk. I curse a lot,

926
00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:48,000
Speaker 3: That's just what I do. And my parents curse a lot.

927
00:41:48,080 --> 00:41:50,640
Speaker 3: So it's like, what do you what did you expect

928
00:41:50,840 --> 00:41:53,880
Speaker 3: was gonna happen? And she, you know her, my sister,

929
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:57,239
Speaker 3: my little sister, My little sister is like the free one.

930
00:41:57,320 --> 00:41:59,400
Speaker 3: She like has never worn draws in her life. And

931
00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:04,200
Speaker 3: you know whatever, my older sisters got her shit together everything,

932
00:42:04,239 --> 00:42:06,520
Speaker 3: she got a calendar for everything. But if she gets

933
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:09,040
Speaker 3: some drinks center, she turns into the free little sister too.

934
00:42:09,520 --> 00:42:11,640
Speaker 3: And I'm just like, you know, in the middle, just

935
00:42:11,719 --> 00:42:14,239
Speaker 3: like I don't know, everything has to kind of be.

936
00:42:14,800 --> 00:42:16,319
Speaker 3: But then I have my days. But I feel like

937
00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:19,120
Speaker 3: they told me, like you're cursing a lot. If you

938
00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:21,040
Speaker 3: want to turn this into a thing, you say a

939
00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:22,920
Speaker 3: lot of bad words. Your family, you know, all the

940
00:42:22,960 --> 00:42:25,440
Speaker 3: family follows you. And I was just like, well, this

941
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:27,440
Speaker 3: is me. This isn't for them, This is for me.

942
00:42:27,920 --> 00:42:31,280
Speaker 3: I'm owning who I am. You know, I'm saying whatever

943
00:42:31,560 --> 00:42:34,320
Speaker 3: I talk on my page like I do to my friends,

944
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:37,040
Speaker 3: because I feel like that's that is my truest me.

945
00:42:37,080 --> 00:42:39,799
Speaker 3: I'm one hundred percent of myself with my friends, and

946
00:42:39,880 --> 00:42:42,640
Speaker 3: I am tired of people painting narratives of me and

947
00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:44,920
Speaker 3: who I am and what I do and you know whatever,

948
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,719
Speaker 3: and so I just took controls. So the first step

949
00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:50,680
Speaker 3: is absolutely just not caring, and it's the hardest thing

950
00:42:50,760 --> 00:42:53,319
Speaker 3: to do, but once you do it, and once you

951
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:56,560
Speaker 3: really get into it of like really not fucking caring

952
00:42:56,560 --> 00:42:59,520
Speaker 3: what anybody thinks. I mean, don't just put your kouchi

953
00:42:59,560 --> 00:43:02,879
Speaker 3: out there on you know, on your I mean, if

954
00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:06,080
Speaker 3: you want to. But it's like once you do it,

955
00:43:06,080 --> 00:43:09,600
Speaker 3: it's so empowering and it's so like freeing, Like you

956
00:43:09,680 --> 00:43:12,840
Speaker 3: just don't realize how much of your life you like

957
00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:16,200
Speaker 3: based around everybody else's opinions. And then once you let

958
00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:20,239
Speaker 3: that go, then you've given yourself the freedom to what

959
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:22,480
Speaker 3: do I like? What do I want to do? And

960
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:25,000
Speaker 3: it feels like when you're a teenager and you first

961
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:26,719
Speaker 3: get your license and like your car and you're like,

962
00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:29,520
Speaker 3: all right, now where am I going to go? You're

963
00:43:29,560 --> 00:43:33,560
Speaker 3: like so excited because you're not held down by what

964
00:43:33,640 --> 00:43:35,520
Speaker 3: society tells you to do or what you think your

965
00:43:35,520 --> 00:43:38,400
Speaker 3: family is going to think. And now my family. You know,

966
00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:40,440
Speaker 3: I went from the middle child that got on everybody's

967
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:42,880
Speaker 3: nurves to I think I'm going to say I'm the

968
00:43:42,920 --> 00:43:48,840
Speaker 3: most impressive, but my personality is it's coming through. And

969
00:43:48,880 --> 00:43:50,560
Speaker 3: I'm just kidding. My sisters are gonna be like, yeah,

970
00:43:51,120 --> 00:43:53,320
Speaker 3: cut down, you're so annoying.

971
00:43:53,520 --> 00:43:56,360
Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean, that's amazing. What a testimony to

972
00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:59,440
Speaker 1: designing your life. I think everybody there is so much

973
00:43:59,480 --> 00:44:03,080
Speaker 1: pressure to to consider everybody else's feelings and everybody else's

974
00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:05,640
Speaker 1: perspective of you and what you're supposed to be doing,

975
00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:07,960
Speaker 1: when in reality, you're supposed to be doing whatever the

976
00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:10,040
Speaker 1: fuck you want, whatever the fuck makes you feel good,

977
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:13,080
Speaker 1: and anyone who makes you question that is not your people.

978
00:44:13,200 --> 00:44:15,719
Speaker 1: And sometimes that requires that you cut off family for

979
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:19,000
Speaker 1: certain times for you to figure it out. And like,

980
00:44:19,080 --> 00:44:22,600
Speaker 1: you're like a fucking renaissance woman. I'm like fucking building shit,

981
00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:23,360
Speaker 1: she's cooking.

982
00:44:23,520 --> 00:44:29,239
Speaker 2: I know, I'm like you a wife, like you did,

983
00:44:29,520 --> 00:44:33,160
Speaker 2: like like she really is a renaissance woman and her hair.

984
00:44:33,080 --> 00:44:35,800
Speaker 1: Is perfectly trimmed and beautifully curled, thank.

985
00:44:35,600 --> 00:44:41,520
Speaker 2: You, And like, yeah, I think too, on top of

986
00:44:41,520 --> 00:44:43,479
Speaker 2: the pressure that like you already feel as a woman,

987
00:44:43,520 --> 00:44:45,920
Speaker 2: and then become a mother, everyone has opinions and then

988
00:44:46,040 --> 00:44:48,720
Speaker 2: you know your children, then how you're raising your children,

989
00:44:48,800 --> 00:44:51,520
Speaker 2: and like just all the different facets of that. And

990
00:44:51,560 --> 00:44:53,640
Speaker 2: I know, like your son he has autism, and I

991
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:56,759
Speaker 2: can imagine there's a lot of judgment too about what

992
00:44:56,800 --> 00:44:59,399
Speaker 2: you should be doing as a mother or this how

993
00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:01,880
Speaker 2: you should be for him, and like that's a whole

994
00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:05,560
Speaker 2: other realm and space where you have to be assertive

995
00:45:05,760 --> 00:45:09,000
Speaker 2: and be like no, So like what would you say

996
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:11,920
Speaker 2: as a mother like too, Like what are the biggest

997
00:45:11,920 --> 00:45:15,799
Speaker 2: misconceptions about, you know, having a child with autism? Well,

998
00:45:15,840 --> 00:45:19,560
Speaker 2: I think one that there's like it's very taboo. People

999
00:45:19,600 --> 00:45:23,200
Speaker 2: moms are embarrassed. It is torture if you sit.

1000
00:45:23,040 --> 00:45:26,160
Speaker 3: In the house and you're like hiding your kid because

1001
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:30,640
Speaker 3: I remember, Ashton is very high functioning, but he still

1002
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:33,160
Speaker 3: has things. There's something called stemming where like he gets

1003
00:45:33,200 --> 00:45:35,080
Speaker 3: really excited, sticks his hands out and he kind of

1004
00:45:35,080 --> 00:45:37,000
Speaker 3: flaps them. But if you were just just see him,

1005
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:40,359
Speaker 3: you wouldn't really know until you like start talking to him.

1006
00:45:40,360 --> 00:45:42,279
Speaker 3: He's four and a half and he still talks like

1007
00:45:42,320 --> 00:45:44,719
Speaker 3: he's two. But you know, once you see him with

1008
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:47,520
Speaker 3: other kids, you can kind of see that something is

1009
00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:50,520
Speaker 3: off and if he's very excited. He also doesn't understand

1010
00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:53,520
Speaker 3: personal boundaries and things like that. But I remember in

1011
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:56,680
Speaker 3: the beginning, so my first son is so easy. He's

1012
00:45:56,800 --> 00:46:00,440
Speaker 3: very independently, like it's like, it's so smart, and he

1013
00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:03,000
Speaker 3: would always test very high on everything. So for me,

1014
00:46:03,040 --> 00:46:05,200
Speaker 3: I was like, oh, motherhood is a piece of fucking cake.

1015
00:46:05,760 --> 00:46:09,520
Speaker 3: And he was the first like grandchild, nephew, so everybody

1016
00:46:09,640 --> 00:46:11,480
Speaker 3: was like, oh, let me babysit, let me watch. I

1017
00:46:11,520 --> 00:46:14,480
Speaker 3: was like, oh, this shit is easy, okay. But the

1018
00:46:14,560 --> 00:46:19,000
Speaker 3: second one humbled the shit out of me because at

1019
00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:22,200
Speaker 3: first I was like, God, I'm not patient. I don't

1020
00:46:22,320 --> 00:46:26,200
Speaker 3: that's why. Yeah, I was, And that's what I've learned now.

1021
00:46:26,239 --> 00:46:30,399
Speaker 3: It's like, I'm really very short tempered. I'm very like impatient.

1022
00:46:30,560 --> 00:46:34,160
Speaker 3: I'm always moving. Things have to fit on my schedule,

1023
00:46:34,239 --> 00:46:36,879
Speaker 3: my plan, or I will fucking lose it. And it's

1024
00:46:36,920 --> 00:46:39,279
Speaker 3: just you can't do that with the you know, a

1025
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:41,279
Speaker 3: kid who has autism. And I literally had to not

1026
00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:44,680
Speaker 3: only change my whole life around, but change my mindset.

1027
00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:47,359
Speaker 3: And I realized that I'm telling people, you know, don't

1028
00:46:47,360 --> 00:46:49,680
Speaker 3: give a fuck about what people think, and blah blah blah,

1029
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:52,320
Speaker 3: and I was doing that with myself, but with Ashton,

1030
00:46:52,360 --> 00:46:55,600
Speaker 3: I was still was like hiding it. And so when

1031
00:46:55,640 --> 00:46:58,400
Speaker 3: I found out I think it's one in every four kids.

1032
00:46:58,440 --> 00:47:01,600
Speaker 3: Now it's diagnosed with thoughts M I'm like, so, why

1033
00:47:01,640 --> 00:47:04,839
Speaker 3: the fuck am I hiding this? Because there's clearly other

1034
00:47:04,960 --> 00:47:07,880
Speaker 3: moms hiding this too, And like I said, it can

1035
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,640
Speaker 3: be you know, you can feel embarrassed and you know,

1036
00:47:10,719 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 3: and then like going to the playground is like a

1037
00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:15,400
Speaker 3: whole thing. When he goes with his brothers, they stay

1038
00:47:15,480 --> 00:47:18,160
Speaker 3: right with him because they are very protective. They don't

1039
00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:20,440
Speaker 3: want anybody. But if it's just me and him, I'm like,

1040
00:47:20,520 --> 00:47:23,680
Speaker 3: oh god. One time this little girls were like in

1041
00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:26,239
Speaker 3: this little area and he starts walking up to him

1042
00:47:26,280 --> 00:47:28,719
Speaker 3: and they're like boys only, and he went and sat down,

1043
00:47:28,840 --> 00:47:32,439
Speaker 3: like what, So he's like they're like playing, so they're

1044
00:47:32,520 --> 00:47:35,920
Speaker 3: running from him and he thinks that they're just running

1045
00:47:36,000 --> 00:47:39,280
Speaker 3: and he's like laughing, and I'm watching, like, oh God,

1046
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:42,000
Speaker 3: do I jump in? Because you also don't want to

1047
00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:45,160
Speaker 3: be a helicopter mom. I'm not going to be there

1048
00:47:45,239 --> 00:47:49,000
Speaker 3: for him forever. I don't want to kids no matter

1049
00:47:49,360 --> 00:47:52,319
Speaker 3: what is going on, you can't hold their hand for

1050
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:54,839
Speaker 3: their entire lives. So this is what I believe, you know,

1051
00:47:55,320 --> 00:47:57,759
Speaker 3: is that you have to kind of let them go

1052
00:47:57,880 --> 00:48:01,759
Speaker 3: out and experience the world because this is you know,

1053
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:04,600
Speaker 3: that that's the world. And I feel like if people

1054
00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:07,760
Speaker 3: would start talking more about their kids with autism or putting,

1055
00:48:07,960 --> 00:48:11,279
Speaker 3: you know, showing it so that you can normalize it,

1056
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:14,799
Speaker 3: so that other parents can see and learn to be

1057
00:48:14,920 --> 00:48:19,160
Speaker 3: more sympathetic about it, be more accepting, I feel like

1058
00:48:19,320 --> 00:48:22,040
Speaker 3: just generally you should talk to your kids about children

1059
00:48:22,040 --> 00:48:24,960
Speaker 3: with disabilities. And it has definitely even with me, you know,

1060
00:48:25,560 --> 00:48:28,720
Speaker 3: it's made me think about kids I was in school

1061
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:31,120
Speaker 3: with growing up that I'm like, oh, they were probably

1062
00:48:31,160 --> 00:48:34,279
Speaker 3: autistic and people would call them like the weird kid,

1063
00:48:34,480 --> 00:48:36,160
Speaker 3: or you know, it would be the one person or

1064
00:48:36,200 --> 00:48:39,319
Speaker 3: the booger boy or booger girl or whatever, and it's

1065
00:48:39,360 --> 00:48:42,200
Speaker 3: like fuck, damn, you feel really fucked up or like

1066
00:48:42,280 --> 00:48:44,799
Speaker 3: how and it's like, no, they probably couldn't even control it.

1067
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:47,279
Speaker 3: But what I would say to any moms that do

1068
00:48:47,400 --> 00:48:50,839
Speaker 3: have children on the spectrum or in general, and I've

1069
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:54,879
Speaker 3: never been a person who was like into like taking

1070
00:48:54,920 --> 00:48:57,359
Speaker 3: vitamins and supplements and this and that and looking at

1071
00:48:57,400 --> 00:48:59,880
Speaker 3: what you eat or whatever. Because I mean my oldest

1072
00:49:00,160 --> 00:49:04,919
Speaker 3: to that they get Dorito's and fucking any fucking thing.

1073
00:49:05,160 --> 00:49:06,960
Speaker 3: It doesn't need to be organic, it doesn't need to

1074
00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:09,200
Speaker 3: be this and that. Then I had this one after

1075
00:49:09,239 --> 00:49:13,920
Speaker 3: doing my own research, which you have to do because unfortunately,

1076
00:49:14,040 --> 00:49:16,400
Speaker 3: pediatricians will just put your kid in a box. It

1077
00:49:16,400 --> 00:49:19,160
Speaker 3: wasn't until I got involved and started doing research and

1078
00:49:19,200 --> 00:49:22,319
Speaker 3: figuring out you have to try shit that the pediatricians

1079
00:49:22,360 --> 00:49:24,719
Speaker 3: sometimes will tell you not to do. And I'm like,

1080
00:49:24,920 --> 00:49:26,880
Speaker 3: I'm gonna do it. I feel like this is you know,

1081
00:49:27,680 --> 00:49:30,680
Speaker 3: as far as like supplements and vitamins. And within that

1082
00:49:30,800 --> 00:49:34,520
Speaker 3: year with COVID, I took him from being nonverbal to

1083
00:49:35,200 --> 00:49:38,440
Speaker 3: he could then recognize like set or in say seventy

1084
00:49:38,440 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 3: two different animal names and recognize everybody to point people out.

1085
00:49:42,680 --> 00:49:45,440
Speaker 3: And now I mean he's talking like shit, you know,

1086
00:49:45,640 --> 00:49:49,279
Speaker 3: and it's like these are things that the doctor said

1087
00:49:49,400 --> 00:49:51,920
Speaker 3: he wasn't as high on the spectrum, you know, or

1088
00:49:52,000 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 3: high functioning. All of these things. Now every time they

1089
00:49:54,680 --> 00:49:56,279
Speaker 3: see them, they're like, what are you doing? And then

1090
00:49:56,320 --> 00:49:58,279
Speaker 3: I go and say, well that changed his diet or

1091
00:49:58,320 --> 00:50:01,240
Speaker 3: added supplements and they're like, well, no, it's not There's

1092
00:50:01,280 --> 00:50:03,720
Speaker 3: been studies this show. I wouldn't know. I'm a doctor.

1093
00:50:03,760 --> 00:50:06,319
Speaker 3: I'm like, okay, I respect what you're saying, but I'm

1094
00:50:06,320 --> 00:50:08,799
Speaker 3: a mother. I'm a mother, okay, and I've been doing

1095
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:10,759
Speaker 3: this and I've been seeing so much growth and you

1096
00:50:10,760 --> 00:50:12,760
Speaker 3: know whatever, so you can't go fuck yourself.

1097
00:50:12,760 --> 00:50:13,360
Speaker 2: But whatever.

1098
00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:16,440
Speaker 3: I'm only here so that you know he's okay. Everything

1099
00:50:16,440 --> 00:50:18,440
Speaker 3: else is okay. But autism, I know. I got that

1100
00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:20,880
Speaker 3: in the bag. But it's fucking hard.

1101
00:50:21,239 --> 00:50:23,399
Speaker 2: It really is what kind of supplements or what kind

1102
00:50:23,400 --> 00:50:25,680
Speaker 2: of research did you find when you really, like so

1103
00:50:25,760 --> 00:50:28,719
Speaker 2: your body naturally, like your liver and stuff flushes out

1104
00:50:28,920 --> 00:50:30,000
Speaker 2: toxins and metals.

1105
00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:34,080
Speaker 3: That's what it's there for. And some people theirs does

1106
00:50:34,200 --> 00:50:37,000
Speaker 3: not work that well. Their body doesn't really flesh out

1107
00:50:37,040 --> 00:50:40,640
Speaker 3: metals and toxins. So I heard about this from another

1108
00:50:40,719 --> 00:50:43,719
Speaker 3: mom whose son had autism, and she was saying she

1109
00:50:43,760 --> 00:50:46,279
Speaker 3: got him tested for metals, and then there's this whole

1110
00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:50,439
Speaker 3: thing called like klation where you give them like this.

1111
00:50:50,520 --> 00:50:52,839
Speaker 3: It was like this crazy thing. It wasn't crazy because

1112
00:50:52,840 --> 00:50:54,640
Speaker 3: it worked for her, but for me, it just didn't work.

1113
00:50:54,640 --> 00:50:57,600
Speaker 3: And it was like every other weekend for four days,

1114
00:50:57,640 --> 00:50:59,480
Speaker 3: every three hours, even in the middle of the night,

1115
00:50:59,560 --> 00:51:01,959
Speaker 3: you give them this supplement, this starts to like take

1116
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:06,319
Speaker 3: out the metals. So Ashton took his test and his

1117
00:51:06,360 --> 00:51:09,319
Speaker 3: metals were very high in aluminum and mercury. And I

1118
00:51:09,400 --> 00:51:11,160
Speaker 3: was like, there's got to be a better fucking way.

1119
00:51:11,200 --> 00:51:13,400
Speaker 3: I'm not gonna be able to wake up every three hours.

1120
00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:15,040
Speaker 3: It's going to fucking my nerves. IM gonna be a

1121
00:51:15,040 --> 00:51:16,960
Speaker 3: bitch because I'm not gonna have no sleep, Like, no,

1122
00:51:17,080 --> 00:51:20,120
Speaker 3: that's not gonna work. And so someone of my followers,

1123
00:51:20,440 --> 00:51:23,480
Speaker 3: which that's the part of being vulnerable that's beneficial. I

1124
00:51:23,520 --> 00:51:25,560
Speaker 3: was talking about how ash And had autism. I was

1125
00:51:25,560 --> 00:51:28,920
Speaker 3: trying to find stuff and they recommended these drops. I

1126
00:51:28,920 --> 00:51:31,279
Speaker 3: think it's called bio ray, and I just put it

1127
00:51:31,280 --> 00:51:33,680
Speaker 3: in his juice and they have all different ones, like

1128
00:51:33,760 --> 00:51:38,200
Speaker 3: for like calm focus. Think it's like belly which is

1129
00:51:38,239 --> 00:51:41,520
Speaker 3: like probiotics and all this stuff. So on top of

1130
00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:44,200
Speaker 3: the other supplements I was giving him, Like I didn't

1131
00:51:44,239 --> 00:51:47,680
Speaker 3: know that magnesium helps the commune. I didn't fucking know that.

1132
00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:49,799
Speaker 3: I knew you need to take it, but I didn't

1133
00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:52,600
Speaker 3: know why. So if he's acting like a complete crackhead

1134
00:51:53,080 --> 00:51:54,920
Speaker 3: for the next couple of days, I'm gonna up how

1135
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:57,080
Speaker 3: much magnesium I give them, and it helps to kind

1136
00:51:57,080 --> 00:52:00,040
Speaker 3: of bring him down. Also, if he gets gluten and

1137
00:52:00,440 --> 00:52:02,160
Speaker 3: I have him on a gluten free diet, I know

1138
00:52:02,200 --> 00:52:04,319
Speaker 3: because he's acting like a crackhead, So then I give

1139
00:52:04,400 --> 00:52:06,160
Speaker 3: him more probiotics to kind of get that out of

1140
00:52:06,160 --> 00:52:11,440
Speaker 3: his system. And I think taking charge of that aspect

1141
00:52:11,480 --> 00:52:14,000
Speaker 3: of it has changed so much, not only in him,

1142
00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:16,799
Speaker 3: but in myself, because now I'm looking at the shit

1143
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:19,680
Speaker 3: that I'm put in my body too. I'm like, Okay,

1144
00:52:19,960 --> 00:52:22,400
Speaker 3: I really need to be more particular, because if a

1145
00:52:22,440 --> 00:52:27,440
Speaker 3: diet can really regulate his behavior as a child, maybe

1146
00:52:27,440 --> 00:52:30,440
Speaker 3: that's why I'm bitchy sometimes. Or maybe I'm just naturally bitchy.

1147
00:52:30,440 --> 00:52:31,680
Speaker 3: I don't know, but we will put it to the

1148
00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:32,680
Speaker 3: test and see what happens to.

1149
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:33,400
Speaker 4: Check my diet.

1150
00:52:34,080 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 2: Oh my god, should we read an advice question? Oh?

1151
00:52:37,239 --> 00:52:40,600
Speaker 1: Yes, we shall. We have an advice question. You know,

1152
00:52:40,840 --> 00:52:44,800
Speaker 1: I forgot we even had this number, but apparently she didn't. Anyway,

1153
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:49,160
Speaker 1: we do have an advice question. Can you play that?

1154
00:52:50,239 --> 00:52:50,399
Speaker 2: Hi?

1155
00:52:52,360 --> 00:52:55,560
Speaker 4: I was wanting to get some advice possibly. I am

1156
00:52:55,640 --> 00:52:58,359
Speaker 4: twenty three years old and I have a two year

1157
00:52:58,360 --> 00:53:04,160
Speaker 4: old I just recently separated from her dad and I

1158
00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:08,600
Speaker 4: am re entering the dating world. However, I feel like

1159
00:53:08,680 --> 00:53:12,560
Speaker 4: I have this giant scarlet letter on me because when

1160
00:53:12,600 --> 00:53:15,280
Speaker 4: I found out I was pregnant, I was also diagnosed

1161
00:53:15,320 --> 00:53:19,600
Speaker 4: with her FEES and you know, the only person I've

1162
00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:23,319
Speaker 4: ever had to tell is my baby daddy. And now

1163
00:53:23,360 --> 00:53:27,480
Speaker 4: I feel super weird, like re entering the dating scene

1164
00:53:27,719 --> 00:53:31,080
Speaker 4: as a single mom, and I have this pretty big

1165
00:53:31,200 --> 00:53:35,040
Speaker 4: thing that you know, Obviously I treat it and I

1166
00:53:35,160 --> 00:53:37,600
Speaker 4: don't experience any symptoms with them as a system that

1167
00:53:37,640 --> 00:53:40,960
Speaker 4: I'm on, but it's still something that needs to be disclosed,

1168
00:53:41,000 --> 00:53:43,920
Speaker 4: and I don't know how exactly to do that. I

1169
00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:47,880
Speaker 4: think I'm just really nervous for any rejection that I

1170
00:53:48,000 --> 00:53:52,280
Speaker 4: might get, and so I was hoping I could get

1171
00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:58,319
Speaker 4: some guidance from some good moms that have also made

1172
00:53:58,400 --> 00:54:02,960
Speaker 4: bad choices who feel my voice.

1173
00:54:05,600 --> 00:54:07,840
Speaker 2: I mean, I think, you know, there's so much shame

1174
00:54:07,920 --> 00:54:13,480
Speaker 2: around sexually transmitted diseases, and they are so common, and

1175
00:54:14,680 --> 00:54:17,160
Speaker 2: you'd be surprised how many people you've probably slept with

1176
00:54:17,160 --> 00:54:19,399
Speaker 2: with a sexually transmitted disease, and whether or not maybe

1177
00:54:19,400 --> 00:54:20,799
Speaker 2: you didn't get it, you know what I mean. But

1178
00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:24,640
Speaker 2: it's especially herpes. I feel like isn't herpes like normal?

1179
00:54:24,680 --> 00:54:27,799
Speaker 3: Now, did you know that if you go get an

1180
00:54:27,920 --> 00:54:30,879
Speaker 3: SCD test, if you don't specifically say herpes, they don't

1181
00:54:30,880 --> 00:54:31,440
Speaker 3: test you for that.

1182
00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:35,480
Speaker 1: No, And also because it's very common that Okay, from

1183
00:54:35,480 --> 00:54:37,719
Speaker 1: my understanding, it's very common that if you get a

1184
00:54:37,960 --> 00:54:41,080
Speaker 1: blood test, it may show up in your blood even

1185
00:54:41,120 --> 00:54:43,840
Speaker 1: if you've never had any indication that you have herpes.

1186
00:54:43,880 --> 00:54:46,360
Speaker 1: It's just dormant, like in your blood. Just because you

1187
00:54:46,600 --> 00:54:49,640
Speaker 1: haven't had an outbreak doesn't mean necessarily that it's not

1188
00:54:49,760 --> 00:54:51,600
Speaker 1: laying like and if you would only know that if

1189
00:54:51,600 --> 00:54:54,480
Speaker 1: you've got a blood test, which most doctors won't just do. Now,

1190
00:54:54,560 --> 00:54:56,719
Speaker 1: unless you go get a SD test and you have

1191
00:54:56,800 --> 00:54:59,719
Speaker 1: an act of outbreak and they can like visually see

1192
00:54:59,719 --> 00:55:02,759
Speaker 1: it and it would still say no, then then they'll

1193
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:03,239
Speaker 1: test you.

1194
00:55:03,840 --> 00:55:06,080
Speaker 2: I think some of these things there is it's a

1195
00:55:06,080 --> 00:55:08,919
Speaker 2: hard conversation, Like it's not something that like, I don't

1196
00:55:08,920 --> 00:55:11,399
Speaker 2: think anybody is excited to have to share. I mean,

1197
00:55:11,640 --> 00:55:14,120
Speaker 2: having sex with someone for the first time is already

1198
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:17,560
Speaker 2: like you know, can be complicated enough then to have

1199
00:55:17,600 --> 00:55:20,520
Speaker 2: to you know, disclose something like that. But I think

1200
00:55:20,560 --> 00:55:23,640
Speaker 2: that there has to be a normalizing of it because

1201
00:55:23,760 --> 00:55:27,680
Speaker 2: also specifically herpes, Like I believe most herpes are.

1202
00:55:27,600 --> 00:55:30,000
Speaker 1: Only you can only get them if you are having

1203
00:55:30,040 --> 00:55:32,359
Speaker 1: an outbreak. Yeah, I believe that to be true. Also,

1204
00:55:32,440 --> 00:55:34,960
Speaker 1: general to herpes is common in the US. More than

1205
00:55:35,239 --> 00:55:38,040
Speaker 1: one out of every six people aged fourteen to forty

1206
00:55:38,120 --> 00:55:41,200
Speaker 1: nine have general tol herpes well.

1207
00:55:41,040 --> 00:55:44,720
Speaker 3: And she said she wanted to know from good moms

1208
00:55:44,719 --> 00:55:48,000
Speaker 3: that made a bad or did. The way she said it,

1209
00:55:48,000 --> 00:55:49,800
Speaker 3: it sounded like she thought it was a bad choice

1210
00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:53,840
Speaker 3: and nothing that she did was Yeah, so it was

1211
00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:54,600
Speaker 3: it's not like.

1212
00:55:54,680 --> 00:55:55,640
Speaker 2: You didn't make a bad choice.

1213
00:55:55,640 --> 00:56:00,120
Speaker 1: You had sex, which everybody has sex, and sometimes I

1214
00:56:00,160 --> 00:56:02,080
Speaker 1: was like, you could wear a condom and probably still

1215
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:05,120
Speaker 1: contract general to herpes because it's just like just the

1216
00:56:05,239 --> 00:56:09,360
Speaker 1: touching of skin. This happened to me. This happened to me.

1217
00:56:09,440 --> 00:56:13,600
Speaker 1: I was back in my lesbian life. I had a

1218
00:56:13,600 --> 00:56:16,879
Speaker 1: girlfriend and we had been dating for like I want

1219
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:20,160
Speaker 1: to say, like three months, and she we were in

1220
00:56:20,200 --> 00:56:22,000
Speaker 1: the bed one night and she reached over and she

1221
00:56:22,080 --> 00:56:22,760
Speaker 1: was like shaking.

1222
00:56:22,800 --> 00:56:24,160
Speaker 2: I was like, she's like, I have to tell you something.

1223
00:56:24,160 --> 00:56:26,759
Speaker 1: I'm like what, And she was like she told me

1224
00:56:26,760 --> 00:56:29,799
Speaker 1: that she had herpes, and that she didn't tell me

1225
00:56:29,840 --> 00:56:31,960
Speaker 1: she was afraid to tell me, and she she knows

1226
00:56:31,960 --> 00:56:33,320
Speaker 1: where she got it from her ex girlfriend.

1227
00:56:33,480 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 2: She takes medicine.

1228
00:56:34,680 --> 00:56:37,440
Speaker 1: She doesn't really have to, like she doesn't like she

1229
00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:39,920
Speaker 1: it only is a thing if she's having a breakout.

1230
00:56:39,920 --> 00:56:41,920
Speaker 1: She explained it to me, and I like, she was

1231
00:56:41,920 --> 00:56:43,600
Speaker 1: like in the other day, I was, I was messling

1232
00:56:43,640 --> 00:56:45,360
Speaker 1: in the shower, like washing my hair, and I was like,

1233
00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:47,880
Speaker 1: if I had STD, I would kill myself or something

1234
00:56:47,920 --> 00:56:50,920
Speaker 1: like I said the word crazy and I was like,

1235
00:56:50,960 --> 00:56:52,640
Speaker 1: oh no, I feel she's like I just left her,

1236
00:56:52,640 --> 00:56:54,239
Speaker 1: went to the store, but I had to tell you.

1237
00:56:54,800 --> 00:56:56,440
Speaker 2: And like I wasn't pissed.

1238
00:56:56,440 --> 00:56:58,600
Speaker 1: I didn't work up with her, Like I didn't contract

1239
00:56:58,640 --> 00:57:01,279
Speaker 1: herpes and everything was fine, you know. And at the time,

1240
00:57:01,360 --> 00:57:03,239
Speaker 1: I had a friend who also had herpes, like that

1241
00:57:03,320 --> 00:57:05,440
Speaker 1: I knew about. But like there is a huge stigma

1242
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:07,440
Speaker 1: about it. But one of my friends told me her

1243
00:57:07,480 --> 00:57:09,600
Speaker 1: doctor is so valid. One of my friends told me

1244
00:57:09,640 --> 00:57:14,040
Speaker 1: that her doctor told her that like in twenty twenty five,

1245
00:57:14,200 --> 00:57:16,640
Speaker 1: like one out of two people will have herpes or

1246
00:57:16,640 --> 00:57:17,000
Speaker 1: some shit.

1247
00:57:17,320 --> 00:57:19,480
Speaker 2: Don't let that stop you from dating. First of all,

1248
00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:21,960
Speaker 2: first and foremost, get your ass out there asap.

1249
00:57:22,480 --> 00:57:25,680
Speaker 1: For everybody listening, we are not by any means doctors.

1250
00:57:25,680 --> 00:57:27,800
Speaker 2: We have no medical profession, zero none.

1251
00:57:28,040 --> 00:57:31,520
Speaker 3: Also, please talk to your medical professional. Please please consult

1252
00:57:31,520 --> 00:57:33,960
Speaker 3: with your doctor before listening to any of this advice.

1253
00:57:34,600 --> 00:57:36,240
Speaker 2: Well, thank you so much for coming.

1254
00:57:35,960 --> 00:57:37,520
Speaker 3: On this, Thanks for having me.

1255
00:57:37,880 --> 00:57:39,640
Speaker 2: Can you tell our people where they can find you.

1256
00:57:40,080 --> 00:57:43,520
Speaker 3: I'm on Instagram at the Funny Mama m O m

1257
00:57:43,680 --> 00:57:46,200
Speaker 3: m A and the Funnymama dot com. And I also

1258
00:57:46,240 --> 00:57:50,680
Speaker 3: have a cookbook, Yes, Sarah Whip Drizzle, Yeah, sir, Whip

1259
00:57:50,760 --> 00:57:55,800
Speaker 3: Drizzle collections of recipes that moms will love. Is easy

1260
00:57:55,840 --> 00:57:57,400
Speaker 3: because it's very easy.

1261
00:57:57,960 --> 00:58:00,960
Speaker 1: Erica loves a fucking resc I do this is She's

1262
00:58:01,000 --> 00:58:03,000
Speaker 1: literally the only bitch I know that's still I mean

1263
00:58:03,000 --> 00:58:05,600
Speaker 1: maybe yeah, she's still online like measuring it perfectly.

1264
00:58:05,640 --> 00:58:07,520
Speaker 2: I'm like, bitch, if you don't, Just because I trying.

1265
00:58:07,320 --> 00:58:08,040
Speaker 1: To try new ship.

1266
00:58:08,320 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 2: Yeah master, they mastered this shit, I'm gonna try it.

1267
00:58:12,440 --> 00:58:15,280
Speaker 3: My whole goal is to make everything. Everything in life

1268
00:58:15,320 --> 00:58:17,040
Speaker 3: can be easy. You just have to figure out how

1269
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:18,960
Speaker 3: to make it easy. That's truly what I believe. I'm

1270
00:58:19,040 --> 00:58:21,360
Speaker 3: very lazy. I'm a middle child, so that's also why.

1271
00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:24,439
Speaker 3: But it has worked for me. I'm gonna be thirty

1272
00:58:24,440 --> 00:58:26,880
Speaker 3: four in September, and I'm still, you know, alive taking

1273
00:58:26,920 --> 00:58:29,040
Speaker 3: all these shortcuts. And the same thing with cooking. You

1274
00:58:29,080 --> 00:58:31,040
Speaker 3: don't have to be super fancy to do all this

1275
00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:33,560
Speaker 3: shit and your kids will love the food and you'll

1276
00:58:33,560 --> 00:58:34,160
Speaker 3: thank me later.

1277
00:58:34,480 --> 00:58:36,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, we needed, I did, I need. I need to

1278
00:58:36,040 --> 00:58:38,080
Speaker 2: get that link a sap. I'm gonna needs to get

1279
00:58:38,080 --> 00:58:39,920
Speaker 2: that book. You guys know where to find us. I

1280
00:58:39,920 --> 00:58:42,440
Speaker 2: had Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices on Instagram, and make

1281
00:58:42,480 --> 00:58:45,160
Speaker 2: sure you go rate and review us on Apple Podcasts. Please.

1282
00:58:45,880 --> 00:58:47,720
Speaker 2: Oh and if you want to watch this episode or

1283
00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:50,640
Speaker 2: any of our episodes like Me and Jamila doming A

1284
00:58:50,760 --> 00:58:53,760
Speaker 2: sub in New York City or I don't know, We've

1285
00:58:53,760 --> 00:58:56,400
Speaker 2: done a lot of visual episodes that should be seen.

1286
00:58:56,600 --> 00:58:57,080
Speaker 2: I hope you.

1287
00:58:57,000 --> 00:59:00,240
Speaker 1: Guys enjoyed that special episode. I know I did. It's

1288
00:59:00,240 --> 00:59:02,640
Speaker 1: so nice to go down memory lane. That episode was

1289
00:59:02,640 --> 00:59:06,280
Speaker 1: from three years ago, but the information is still valid.

1290
00:59:06,440 --> 00:59:08,640
Speaker 2: As you guys know, we're currently off season, so if

1291
00:59:08,640 --> 00:59:11,680
Speaker 2: you want bonus episodes, we are really not off season

1292
00:59:11,680 --> 00:59:14,200
Speaker 2: over on Patreon, so click the link in this episode description.

1293
00:59:14,560 --> 00:59:17,720
Speaker 2: Ten dollars a month gets you bonus episodes every single week,

1294
00:59:17,840 --> 00:59:23,120
Speaker 2: access to our discord community, close friends, monthly Zoom meetups, discounts,

1295
00:59:23,320 --> 00:59:27,120
Speaker 2: retreat discounts, basically, everything that you don't get here you

1296
00:59:27,160 --> 00:59:29,160
Speaker 2: get over there. It really is a whole tribe and

1297
00:59:29,160 --> 00:59:31,080
Speaker 2: a whole community over there, So click the link in

1298
00:59:31,080 --> 00:59:34,000
Speaker 2: this episode description and join us off season on Patreon.

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Speaker 3: The latter they asked