1 00:00:12,400 --> 00:00:15,200 Speaker 1: Hi, Hi, how are you. It's been so long. 2 00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:19,239 Speaker 2: I know I was excited, so like, what is it now? 3 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:20,720 Speaker 2: What is the overall? 4 00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:23,480 Speaker 1: I think it's lifestyle. I think it's overall, you know, 5 00:00:24,079 --> 00:00:28,880 Speaker 1: speaking to predominantly young women, and I never call myself 6 00:00:28,920 --> 00:00:31,560 Speaker 1: a dating expert. It's not that I think that people 7 00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:33,559 Speaker 1: come to me because I've figured out a way to 8 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:36,560 Speaker 1: be pretty happy being single, and more and more women 9 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:38,680 Speaker 1: are waiting to settle down. There's a record number of 10 00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:40,879 Speaker 1: women who are over thirty who are single. There's a 11 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:43,520 Speaker 1: record number of women over thirty who have bought homes 12 00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:46,320 Speaker 1: by themselves. So we are in this new era and 13 00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:49,400 Speaker 1: it's exciting, but it's also a little uncomfortable for a 14 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:51,400 Speaker 1: lot of young women because they're like, but wait, everyone 15 00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:52,839 Speaker 1: told me I have to get married, but I'm not 16 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:54,800 Speaker 1: really ready yet. I'm kind of working on myself. 17 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,760 Speaker 3: There's a thing with women at many ages, like there's 18 00:00:57,760 --> 00:01:02,000 Speaker 3: a defensiveness about I don't need a man, Like it's okay, true, 19 00:01:02,040 --> 00:01:05,160 Speaker 3: but it's a defensiveness about it that feels like you're 20 00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:08,360 Speaker 3: not being totally honest, Like you're that person that's how 21 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,080 Speaker 3: do I explain it? Like you're making an excuse and 22 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:14,240 Speaker 3: being defensive because you can't get a man when there 23 00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:17,560 Speaker 3: are so many people now that I'm realizing too don't 24 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:22,560 Speaker 3: want a man, like don't want a man. This is 25 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:26,200 Speaker 3: an weird age where I'm shocked by myself. I don't 26 00:01:26,200 --> 00:01:29,280 Speaker 3: recognize myself because I'm like, I don't like it's weird, 27 00:01:29,360 --> 00:01:30,960 Speaker 3: and I don't think about men really that much. 28 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,319 Speaker 2: Like I'll go on a date with. 29 00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:36,920 Speaker 3: A major guy like could be a billionaire, good looking, successful, amazing, 30 00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:39,240 Speaker 3: likes me, and I like kind of won't give a shit, 31 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:41,959 Speaker 3: like I forget if I texted him back, Like that's 32 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:44,840 Speaker 3: not my personality. That's a Kristin Cavalary on the Hills personality, 33 00:01:44,880 --> 00:01:47,440 Speaker 3: Like I don't what the fuck is going on, but 34 00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:49,920 Speaker 3: I just I don't know. 35 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:52,520 Speaker 1: It's just like old you're happy, you have a great life, 36 00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:55,560 Speaker 1: Like it's nice. Now it's like if you find someone 37 00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:58,560 Speaker 1: who is like the moon and stars and they make 38 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,640 Speaker 1: your life better and they it's like and it's an 39 00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:03,400 Speaker 1: add on, then great. But if not, you're good, which 40 00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:05,240 Speaker 1: is like an amazing place to get It's. 41 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:08,160 Speaker 3: Something people talk about, but to get it in your body. 42 00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:11,120 Speaker 3: It feels like the ozembic of dating, Like yeah, it happens, 43 00:02:11,120 --> 00:02:11,400 Speaker 3: and I. 44 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:12,960 Speaker 2: Think it's kind of almost like a cleanse. 45 00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:15,680 Speaker 3: Okay, it happened to me where there was someone that 46 00:02:15,720 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 3: I was still like thinking about, not thinking about, but 47 00:02:17,320 --> 00:02:19,960 Speaker 3: it becomes like food noise. It's noisy, but the person 48 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,679 Speaker 3: doesn't make you feel good. You don't really like them. 49 00:02:21,919 --> 00:02:24,880 Speaker 3: You're just like in this habitual thing and when you cleanse, 50 00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:27,160 Speaker 3: and that's why I think it was like Kate Hudson 51 00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:29,919 Speaker 3: who talked about a year with that dating which sounds crazy, 52 00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:32,160 Speaker 3: or people that have these things, it could be two 53 00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:35,919 Speaker 3: weeks no contact. The cleansing of it, it clears your 54 00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:39,040 Speaker 3: mind and it's like it's like the way that people 55 00:02:39,080 --> 00:02:41,160 Speaker 3: cleanse out sugar or something, and then you're just like, wait, 56 00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:43,560 Speaker 3: I actually don't even think I need that thing. So 57 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:47,399 Speaker 3: I think that's a very interesting concept that's honestly new 58 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:47,640 Speaker 3: to me. 59 00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:49,240 Speaker 2: And I'm way older than you. 60 00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:52,600 Speaker 1: I would like to fall in love, I really would, 61 00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:56,240 Speaker 1: but I'm also refused to settle. I've seen so many 62 00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:59,440 Speaker 1: women in my own life and just in the greater world, 63 00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:03,320 Speaker 1: like have their lives derailed by because they were like 64 00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:06,000 Speaker 1: I'm in my thirties and I've got to do this. Yeah, 65 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:09,080 Speaker 1: I don't feel that I genuinely it took me a 66 00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:11,320 Speaker 1: long time. I talk about getting over the hump, I 67 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:13,520 Speaker 1: wouldn't say. Only in the past year have I genuinely 68 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:15,280 Speaker 1: got over the hump. I think before maybe I was 69 00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:17,359 Speaker 1: like lying a little bit. It's to your point, exactly 70 00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:19,160 Speaker 1: what you've said, defensive a little bit like, well, I'm 71 00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,440 Speaker 1: fine if I don't. I would love to be in love. 72 00:03:21,560 --> 00:03:23,520 Speaker 1: I love being in love. I'm obsessed with it. It's 73 00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:27,120 Speaker 1: the best feeling, obviously. But if it's not great, if 74 00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:29,560 Speaker 1: he's not adding to my life, then I don't need it. 75 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:32,080 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna sit across the table from a boring guy. 76 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:35,240 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna have a guy who's intimidated by me 77 00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:38,560 Speaker 1: and my ambition. I'm not gonna. I'm just not like, 78 00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:41,160 Speaker 1: I rate this too short, like I'm good, Like I'm 79 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:43,800 Speaker 1: good until I meet someone great, which I want to. 80 00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:47,280 Speaker 3: If you don't love it, you don't like it. But 81 00:03:47,320 --> 00:03:49,720 Speaker 3: here's the thing. You haven't hit the witching hour. The 82 00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:51,760 Speaker 3: witching hour is thirty seven and thirty eight, so you 83 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:54,080 Speaker 3: don't have to pay serious attention to the witching hour. 84 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:56,840 Speaker 3: The witching hour is thirty seven and thirty eight because 85 00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 3: that's like, you're close to forty. That's the clock, that's 86 00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:01,960 Speaker 3: the real, that's the real. That's when the fucking rubber 87 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,760 Speaker 3: meets the road. And that's when I made my I 88 00:04:04,760 --> 00:04:06,200 Speaker 3: don't want to say I have the most beautiful daughter 89 00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:09,040 Speaker 3: in the world, but that's when I made a fatal era, 90 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:12,680 Speaker 3: the ultimate of settling, and the same type of logic 91 00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:15,560 Speaker 3: of the settling of the settlings before, the same logic 92 00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:17,680 Speaker 3: about how much someone loves you more than you love 93 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:19,919 Speaker 3: them and you'll never find someone who loves you this much, 94 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,600 Speaker 3: and the logic and what everyone else says, and this 95 00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:25,479 Speaker 3: person's so night and all the things. It's that you 96 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:27,360 Speaker 3: don't love it, you don't like it. You'll be on 97 00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:30,520 Speaker 3: this podcast before them. But hopefully when you're thirty seven, 98 00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:32,480 Speaker 3: then we'll talk about the Witching hour and you'll probably 99 00:04:32,520 --> 00:04:34,919 Speaker 3: be in a relationship and I probably will too, but 100 00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:37,560 Speaker 3: if we're h you never know. But I like that 101 00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:39,800 Speaker 3: that's a pocket for you. I like that that's an 102 00:04:39,839 --> 00:04:43,480 Speaker 3: interesting pocket. And it's funny because I'm talking about the 103 00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:45,760 Speaker 3: same thing but to a woman in a different pocket, 104 00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:50,120 Speaker 3: meaning like people your age and younger, So like there's 105 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:56,200 Speaker 3: a guy that is an extraordinarily smart, a successful, tall 106 00:04:56,320 --> 00:04:59,520 Speaker 3: like man about town let's say many towns, right, And 107 00:05:00,160 --> 00:05:03,840 Speaker 3: I can tell that he's used to girls your age 108 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:06,520 Speaker 3: who are impressed by all this stuff and they want 109 00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:09,839 Speaker 3: They're dangling around, texting back and like panting, even if 110 00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:12,000 Speaker 3: they're trying to pretend they're not panting, is an energetic 111 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:14,839 Speaker 3: panting because they want the bag and the paying for 112 00:05:14,920 --> 00:05:18,040 Speaker 3: something and maybe the boobs, and like I could tell 113 00:05:18,080 --> 00:05:20,839 Speaker 3: that they're like shocked, like you think you're gonna text 114 00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:24,039 Speaker 3: me I had a nice time, and then two days later, 115 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 3: maybe you'll text me again and be like, when are 116 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:27,200 Speaker 3: you coming back from wherever? And then I tell you 117 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:29,440 Speaker 3: when I'm coming back from whatever, Like now we're pam pals, 118 00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:31,640 Speaker 3: like get the fuck out of here. I don't need 119 00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:33,880 Speaker 3: your chanel, dumb bat, like go cook to a thirty 120 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:36,640 Speaker 3: seven year old. But the problem is he's gonna be 121 00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:39,520 Speaker 3: like with the thirty seven year old who's like begging 122 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,800 Speaker 3: for a baby, and he doesn't want that. And the 123 00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:44,760 Speaker 3: forty seven year old has two babies, so now he's 124 00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:45,560 Speaker 3: fucking stuck with me. 125 00:05:46,160 --> 00:05:47,720 Speaker 2: And I talk about shit like that. 126 00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:50,880 Speaker 3: Because it's the phases and stages that are very, very different, 127 00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:53,719 Speaker 3: and it's why young women have to work and have 128 00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:54,280 Speaker 3: their own money. 129 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:55,719 Speaker 2: They can be stay at home moms. 130 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:57,599 Speaker 3: They could do whatever the fuck they want, but they 131 00:05:57,640 --> 00:06:00,320 Speaker 3: have to because the man that I'm going out to night, 132 00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:02,800 Speaker 3: the person who set us up, said to me, the 133 00:06:02,920 --> 00:06:05,560 Speaker 3: last person was the person that would call them that 134 00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:06,880 Speaker 3: they would go in to dinner and would say can 135 00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:10,120 Speaker 3: we stop at this you know, high end store before 136 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:11,760 Speaker 3: because and make the guy pity? 137 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:14,800 Speaker 1: Okay, but because you believe that that is not in 138 00:06:14,920 --> 00:06:17,000 Speaker 1: my DNA. And I'm not trying to be high and 139 00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:19,560 Speaker 1: mighty holier than now. I'm really not, because I'm all 140 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:22,080 Speaker 1: about girls getting their bag anyway. 141 00:06:22,279 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 2: I literal bag. Oh. 142 00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:26,800 Speaker 1: One thing I wanted to ask you about actually what 143 00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:30,039 Speaker 1: you have so much energy? You're very dominant, you know 144 00:06:30,080 --> 00:06:32,800 Speaker 1: exactly what you want. Like, have you found that difficult 145 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:35,120 Speaker 1: in dating, because like I've been told by several people 146 00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:38,440 Speaker 1: that I I'm like almost it's a lot masculine like 147 00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:41,360 Speaker 1: or something, but like I don't know how to change. 148 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:41,359 Speaker 3: It and. 149 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:44,640 Speaker 2: Absolutely not. 150 00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:48,000 Speaker 1: But everyone's like get into your feminine energy, and I'm like, 151 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:51,040 Speaker 1: I don't know how because I've always like saved myself, 152 00:06:51,080 --> 00:06:53,920 Speaker 1: Like I've always just been like take I'm my own life, right. 153 00:06:53,839 --> 00:06:55,520 Speaker 2: I've got it. I got it. I got your answer. 154 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:59,159 Speaker 2: They like to save us, but I keep got your answered. 155 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:01,680 Speaker 2: No tell me, no, it's not okay, so. 156 00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:04,640 Speaker 3: Zach, I'll give you the script because I am there's 157 00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:07,039 Speaker 3: I will say this with I will take on any 158 00:07:07,040 --> 00:07:09,320 Speaker 3: supermodel for like getting met like I'm not I've never 159 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:11,160 Speaker 3: had a problem getting meant if I had a problem 160 00:07:11,240 --> 00:07:14,200 Speaker 3: sustaining because maybe I run or maybe I picked the 161 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:16,520 Speaker 3: wrong men or whatever, it is, like, that's what we 162 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:19,720 Speaker 3: can unpack that in another session. But I'm not, like, 163 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:22,240 Speaker 3: I'm not stuttering when I say this. I'm good at 164 00:07:22,520 --> 00:07:27,600 Speaker 3: so man going out to dinner with suggests striving a 165 00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:30,640 Speaker 3: distance to come to me versus the opposite. And I've 166 00:07:30,640 --> 00:07:33,000 Speaker 3: seen many others do it another way. And it's like no, 167 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,000 Speaker 3: but so this person is and I didn't demand it. 168 00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:36,720 Speaker 3: This person is doing it, which is just a sign. 169 00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:38,960 Speaker 3: It means okay, that's who that person is. And that's 170 00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:40,800 Speaker 3: part of the whole program that you got a bank, 171 00:07:40,880 --> 00:07:43,360 Speaker 3: because every single thing does matter and is the baigest 172 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:44,880 Speaker 3: of blushes of Pink's flags. 173 00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:47,640 Speaker 2: So then says what time? 174 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:50,720 Speaker 3: He said, any time works And I said, right, well, 175 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:52,400 Speaker 3: I want to make sure that you're coming at a 176 00:07:52,480 --> 00:07:54,240 Speaker 3: time that you're not going to get hit by a 177 00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:56,720 Speaker 3: lot of traffic. And I reiterated that a few times. 178 00:07:57,160 --> 00:08:00,280 Speaker 3: So that's caring, that's considerate, that's caring. It happened again 179 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:02,320 Speaker 3: in Florida. Someone was driving two hours to come take 180 00:08:02,360 --> 00:08:04,120 Speaker 3: me to dinner. And this was a major bag alert 181 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:07,240 Speaker 3: guy and the same thing. And I was like, right, 182 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:09,160 Speaker 3: but I really I could meet you halfway. I really 183 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:12,280 Speaker 3: don't think you should be drug like and they mentioned 184 00:08:12,320 --> 00:08:15,720 Speaker 3: five times each like how that was so considerate or 185 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:17,960 Speaker 3: like you're dying. 186 00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:20,320 Speaker 2: You know the restaurant they've picked as shit. 187 00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:23,840 Speaker 3: So you could be like, no, that sounds great and 188 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:25,880 Speaker 3: if you're if you want to go there, amazing. I 189 00:08:25,960 --> 00:08:28,559 Speaker 3: you know, I know that Janine's next door is also 190 00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:31,560 Speaker 3: very lovely. But really what I wanted, whatever you want 191 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:33,640 Speaker 3: to do, like, that's your feminine energy. 192 00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:36,079 Speaker 2: It's just the consideration and the pleasing. 193 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:39,200 Speaker 3: And they are used to smash and grab and women 194 00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 3: either nag or I'm. 195 00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:43,120 Speaker 1: Used to being like that restaurant sucks. You want me 196 00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:44,840 Speaker 1: to fix it for you, and I like, I need 197 00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:46,200 Speaker 1: to stop because but you. 198 00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:49,280 Speaker 3: Don't need to be not opinionated at dinner, and you 199 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:52,880 Speaker 3: don't need I would say, talking about work should come 200 00:08:52,920 --> 00:08:56,120 Speaker 3: when you're in the talking about work section. Yeah, and 201 00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,679 Speaker 3: the mic has to be passed and really get a 202 00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:02,600 Speaker 3: lot out about them and a lot get it all 203 00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:05,120 Speaker 3: and really talk to them about their business because it's 204 00:09:05,480 --> 00:09:08,760 Speaker 3: very interesting. The major bagg or Miami guy, I found 205 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:11,960 Speaker 3: him like going on and like asking me a thousand 206 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:13,640 Speaker 3: questions because we've been talking about him for an hour 207 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:15,640 Speaker 3: and a half. And I really don't like talking about myself. 208 00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:18,079 Speaker 3: So I was like, I get in, and I get in, 209 00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:19,839 Speaker 3: and I just like get out, and I want to 210 00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:21,160 Speaker 3: keep it on them to the point where he was 211 00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:24,800 Speaker 3: like begging me to talk all about myself. So you 212 00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:28,000 Speaker 3: have to just like let the butter melt and it 213 00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:31,319 Speaker 3: will happen. And younger women, because when I was your age, 214 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:34,600 Speaker 3: want somehow for the other person to like really know 215 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:38,760 Speaker 3: who they are. They really and energy shows who you are, 216 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:41,560 Speaker 3: Like energy is who you are. Women want men to 217 00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:43,920 Speaker 3: like they want men to know how fucked up their 218 00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:47,079 Speaker 3: lives where even if it's subtle or how bamboozled they were, 219 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:49,880 Speaker 3: or how sweet they are, or how they want to they. 220 00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:51,480 Speaker 2: Just intrinsically. 221 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:54,839 Speaker 3: You want to cram it all in on the first 222 00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:59,040 Speaker 3: and you just just chill and let the butter fucking melt. 223 00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:04,240 Speaker 3: They know, they know, And yes, you're definitely good at 224 00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:08,280 Speaker 3: being flirty and feminine, and you wear the flirty outfit 225 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:10,360 Speaker 3: on the first day, and you cosplay the flirty and 226 00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:12,960 Speaker 3: that's the feminine. It's just not coming in and like 227 00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:17,200 Speaker 3: taking over because their ex wife was doing that and 228 00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:20,160 Speaker 3: their ex girlfriend was nagging them and they weren't having 229 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,280 Speaker 3: a conversation that's intelligent about what they do for a living, 230 00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:25,720 Speaker 3: and it's not about how smart. 231 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:27,440 Speaker 2: And I am like this too. 232 00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:30,319 Speaker 3: I want them to know how smart I am, because 233 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:33,200 Speaker 3: I'm smart and most women are. It's not they know, 234 00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:35,920 Speaker 3: they'll know, and the subtleties of your vocabulary and the 235 00:10:35,920 --> 00:10:38,000 Speaker 3: way that you're talking about what they're doing that will 236 00:10:38,040 --> 00:10:38,920 Speaker 3: make you seem smart. 237 00:10:38,960 --> 00:10:40,640 Speaker 2: It doesn't need to all jammed in. 238 00:10:41,080 --> 00:10:43,920 Speaker 1: Crazy good advice. That is my nugget that I'm taking 239 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,920 Speaker 1: from you this time. That no, that is really good 240 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:49,880 Speaker 1: because I think like I've surpassed that you're so on 241 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:52,560 Speaker 1: the money about young girls. They're like they want to 242 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:54,400 Speaker 1: say things to say how sweet they are and I've 243 00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:56,640 Speaker 1: I've left all of it, but I have the same 244 00:10:56,679 --> 00:10:58,680 Speaker 1: thing where I'm like, I need this guy to know 245 00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:01,520 Speaker 1: I'm smart and I have my own shit going on, 246 00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:04,520 Speaker 1: and I'm like, you're right, energy does it? Energy does it? 247 00:11:04,559 --> 00:11:07,080 Speaker 3: You don't need to And it's confidence and it's calm, 248 00:11:07,440 --> 00:11:11,440 Speaker 3: so right, And that's the part that is masculine, Like 249 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:13,480 Speaker 3: that is the part that doesn't need to be. 250 00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:14,320 Speaker 2: It gets through. 251 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:16,920 Speaker 3: It gets through, and talking about a recipe it gets through, 252 00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:19,800 Speaker 3: and talking about molecular gastronomy, it comes through. 253 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:22,199 Speaker 2: There's an assistant that I have that just started. She's 254 00:11:22,200 --> 00:11:22,640 Speaker 2: twenty four. 255 00:11:22,679 --> 00:11:25,040 Speaker 3: She's said ten words at a dinner last night, but like, 256 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:27,079 Speaker 3: I know she's smart because of two of the words, 257 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:29,599 Speaker 3: like right, if she didn't shut the fuck up, I 258 00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:30,800 Speaker 3: would have thought she was stupid. 259 00:11:30,960 --> 00:11:46,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, Where is dating better for you? Miami or 260 00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:46,400 Speaker 1: New York. 261 00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:48,840 Speaker 3: It's all the same because it's the same person. It's 262 00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:52,400 Speaker 3: the same person that's running in the same circles. And also, 263 00:11:52,559 --> 00:11:56,280 Speaker 3: like the other thing is like you really gotta be okay, 264 00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:59,720 Speaker 3: So women sit here and talk about this and again 265 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:01,360 Speaker 3: this is like it took me to this age and 266 00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:04,440 Speaker 3: my calling is like is like to like I'm talking 267 00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:06,160 Speaker 3: to the moms, but it's really a lot of the 268 00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:06,640 Speaker 3: young girls. 269 00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:08,440 Speaker 2: I didn't know so many young girls watch me. Yeah, 270 00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:10,439 Speaker 2: I'll me. Sixteen year olds would be like, I'm like, 271 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:12,400 Speaker 2: why am I your aunt? I made that up? 272 00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:14,240 Speaker 3: They're like, no, You're just the only one telling the truth. 273 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, I thought it was your Like crazy ant. 274 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 3: You're just a person. You're not a man a woman. 275 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:19,720 Speaker 3: You're not old, you're not young. 276 00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:20,040 Speaker 2: You're just that. 277 00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:24,320 Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, so another thing that was going on 278 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:28,640 Speaker 3: with me for forever is like the resume, it's the 279 00:12:28,720 --> 00:12:31,240 Speaker 3: grout and it's not the tiles that is important. So 280 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:34,839 Speaker 3: it's not the like the height, the thing, all these 281 00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:37,240 Speaker 3: things that yes, kind of matter, but it's the way 282 00:12:37,320 --> 00:12:41,680 Speaker 3: the person migrates, Okay, the way they migrate their patterns. 283 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:45,360 Speaker 3: Like in other words, some people want to say at 284 00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:48,080 Speaker 3: the Aman in turks and Kicos, which is forty minutes 285 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:50,920 Speaker 3: from the town, I'd rather stay at a slightly less 286 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:53,520 Speaker 3: nice hotel to be near the coffee and the walking 287 00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:55,920 Speaker 3: in and the walking up, because I'm not that social. 288 00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:58,480 Speaker 3: And an aspin I like asp and you'd think I'm 289 00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:01,480 Speaker 3: so social. It's because when I go I feel like 290 00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:03,600 Speaker 3: I get to do something by just walking into town 291 00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:06,160 Speaker 3: or right, and some people are the want to stay 292 00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:09,160 Speaker 3: at the remote or some people like it's it's who's 293 00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:10,880 Speaker 3: to like wake up at seven in the morning and 294 00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:14,000 Speaker 3: do the hike. Person like, you gotta be honest about 295 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:17,360 Speaker 3: your honest patterns and cadence. Right, Let's say someone lives 296 00:13:17,400 --> 00:13:19,200 Speaker 3: in a certain city. It does it's not about the city, 297 00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:21,440 Speaker 3: but it's about like they like the type that like 298 00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:23,640 Speaker 3: belongs to a sailing club and they're like a little 299 00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:27,040 Speaker 3: like stoic, waspy. They don't show their feel like that's 300 00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:30,760 Speaker 3: an essence more than like the action resume, and you 301 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,160 Speaker 3: have to pay attention to the in between more than 302 00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:35,400 Speaker 3: the big because that's what you're doing every day. 303 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:38,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, I like that a lot too. I know. That's 304 00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:40,760 Speaker 1: why I think dating apps are not really working for 305 00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:44,200 Speaker 1: people anymore, because now it's like it's so boiled down 306 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:47,120 Speaker 1: to just a few pictures and like three words and 307 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:49,680 Speaker 1: that's the resume. And it's like you don't know how 308 00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:52,280 Speaker 1: someone laughs. You don't know someone until you hear them 309 00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:55,320 Speaker 1: order a drink, until you see how they like order 310 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:58,000 Speaker 1: for the table or whatever whatever they say, Like you 311 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:00,760 Speaker 1: really need to be around someone to get their essence. 312 00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:03,560 Speaker 1: And just looking at someone, Oh he's six to two, 313 00:14:03,640 --> 00:14:06,000 Speaker 1: Oh he's this, he went here, like it doesn't really, 314 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:08,960 Speaker 1: it's it's so hard to know if there's a vibe. 315 00:14:08,720 --> 00:14:11,679 Speaker 3: It's the essence, it's the alchemy, it's that. Yeah, and 316 00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:14,320 Speaker 3: this is another thing I think is interesting, Like and 317 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:15,000 Speaker 3: I found. 318 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:15,560 Speaker 2: Myself doing it too. 319 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:17,960 Speaker 3: You'll you'll all judge, Like it was the shoe, it 320 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:20,080 Speaker 3: was the couch, it was the thing I saw behind 321 00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:22,160 Speaker 3: them in the house. It was the teeth, it was 322 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:25,840 Speaker 3: the whate and like someone says, someone that's very smart, 323 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:29,920 Speaker 3: that's very experienced, said to me, under new management, that 324 00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:33,880 Speaker 3: will change, like under new management, And I thought, Tinks, 325 00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:35,480 Speaker 3: I gotta talk to Tinks about this because it was 326 00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:37,440 Speaker 3: extremely recent, right, like. 327 00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:41,480 Speaker 1: Shut the fuck, shut the fuck you. I'm so bad though, 328 00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:43,920 Speaker 1: I'm judge, Judy, I know I see something and I 329 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:47,760 Speaker 1: just ough. But you're right, you're right, your friend is right. Yes, 330 00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:49,800 Speaker 1: under new management, it can it can all change. And 331 00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:52,360 Speaker 1: sometimes we've all seen a guy who we passed on, 332 00:14:52,440 --> 00:14:54,720 Speaker 1: whatever we thought he was whatever, he gets with a 333 00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:57,400 Speaker 1: really hot girl and then you're like, oh wait, did 334 00:14:57,440 --> 00:15:00,760 Speaker 1: I whoa And she refurbishes him period. 335 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:04,440 Speaker 3: He's like where she's imported him from, like a suburb 336 00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,840 Speaker 3: where they didn't know women existed, and she's like a 337 00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:09,080 Speaker 3: seven and he's a nine and she's turned him into 338 00:15:09,080 --> 00:15:09,840 Speaker 3: who he needs to be. 339 00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:11,920 Speaker 2: She took a fucking import. Yeah. 340 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,560 Speaker 3: The importing is, Yeah, you go to a city where 341 00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:16,360 Speaker 3: it's not like going that good over there, and you 342 00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:18,160 Speaker 3: get a guy who doesn't know anything, but he's like 343 00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:20,320 Speaker 3: smart and has money, and you bring him over and 344 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:21,960 Speaker 3: you put him in some good clothes and shine that 345 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:22,480 Speaker 3: ship up. 346 00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:28,680 Speaker 1: Import exactly. That's import. That's very good. Imports and refurbishments. Yeah, yeah, right, 347 00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:34,120 Speaker 1: and refurbishment. It can happen as if I need another job, 348 00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:34,760 Speaker 1: but yes. 349 00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:38,640 Speaker 3: No, but I've looked at people that are super super 350 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:41,960 Speaker 3: successful and like and also sometimes you didn't know, like 351 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:43,480 Speaker 3: you didn't know who they were, and then you see 352 00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:45,840 Speaker 3: that it's like your guy that you trained on the 353 00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:47,800 Speaker 3: next girl, how about that you're welcome for your boyfriend 354 00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:48,240 Speaker 3: my assistance. 355 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:49,840 Speaker 1: Oh my god, some of the I know some of 356 00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:51,720 Speaker 1: the work that I've done, and they're they're out there, 357 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:53,720 Speaker 1: the girls like I need a fruit basket from these 358 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:55,800 Speaker 1: girls out there, Like I did all this work, Like 359 00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:58,840 Speaker 1: these guys are in therapy now, like they're not wearing 360 00:15:58,880 --> 00:15:59,840 Speaker 1: skinny jeans like. 361 00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:03,280 Speaker 3: Thank you card, Like, no, it's I guess it's a 362 00:16:03,280 --> 00:16:04,680 Speaker 3: community thing and we're all doing. 363 00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:05,040 Speaker 2: It for each other. 364 00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:06,680 Speaker 1: We're all doing it for each other. Yeah, I guess 365 00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:08,880 Speaker 1: it's a pay it forward. Have you ever DMD a guy? 366 00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:10,360 Speaker 1: Have you ever like thought a guy was cute and 367 00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:11,040 Speaker 1: just gone for it? 368 00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:14,920 Speaker 3: No, I'm such a big game hunter now. I love 369 00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:17,640 Speaker 3: that it's go big or go home. I'm such a 370 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:20,640 Speaker 3: big game hunter because of just institutional knowledge of it 371 00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:24,720 Speaker 3: not working otherwise that it makes it really simple. And 372 00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:29,280 Speaker 3: if someone's not smart, if someone's not philanthropic, if someone's 373 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:35,000 Speaker 3: not educated, if someone isn't wealthy and successful and like additive, 374 00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:37,120 Speaker 3: or we'd be a good puzzle. You know, a certain 375 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:40,040 Speaker 3: type of parent, you know I've dealt with. But I mean, 376 00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:41,680 Speaker 3: but by the same token, I was out with a 377 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:44,800 Speaker 3: very successful man and he was rude to a weight staff. 378 00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:47,080 Speaker 3: I stood up mid meal and walked and walked out 379 00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:50,360 Speaker 3: in like a major guy, Like I don't play games 380 00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:54,760 Speaker 3: with like rudeness or ex crazy wives or situations with 381 00:16:54,840 --> 00:16:57,000 Speaker 3: an X that's on drugs and you got custody of 382 00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,120 Speaker 3: the kids and some drama. Like there's a lot of 383 00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:00,880 Speaker 3: I don't deal with any anything. So the thing is 384 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:05,000 Speaker 3: it's very specific. So I'm usually set up because someone 385 00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:07,199 Speaker 3: has like vetted someone. I used to not be like 386 00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:09,399 Speaker 3: this at all. This is a last couple of year thing. 387 00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:11,560 Speaker 3: But I'm not playing any games for the most part. 388 00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:15,679 Speaker 3: There are some exceptions, but I don't want to waste 389 00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:17,840 Speaker 3: any time away from my daughter, and I'm only going 390 00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:20,040 Speaker 3: out if I really think it's someone who's superb. I'm not, 391 00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:22,440 Speaker 3: but you're young. I didn't do that at that age, 392 00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:23,679 Speaker 3: but maybe I would have been better if I did 393 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:25,920 Speaker 3: do that a little bit more. Yeah, because you waste 394 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,920 Speaker 3: some time, Like if you're getting into the Witching Hour 395 00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:30,640 Speaker 3: in the next four years, you don't want to waste 396 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:34,080 Speaker 3: time either. You want a quality versus quantity model at 397 00:17:34,080 --> 00:17:36,080 Speaker 3: your age twenty four, do whatever you want, twenty seven, 398 00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:39,320 Speaker 3: twenty eight, great, getting into the thirty five, thirty six, 399 00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,119 Speaker 3: thirty seven, I think, yeah, you've got to be a 400 00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:44,159 Speaker 3: little more discerning because you're flapping your wings and wasting 401 00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:47,639 Speaker 3: your time, getting exhausted and then you're full and you 402 00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:49,280 Speaker 3: don't want to go back to the buffet when there 403 00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:50,800 Speaker 3: could be something at the end of the buffet. 404 00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:52,879 Speaker 2: So you wait for the good entrees. 405 00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:55,000 Speaker 1: Okay, I'll wait, I'm waiting. I'm good. 406 00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:57,240 Speaker 3: Know what I mean, Like, be discerning, take a little 407 00:17:57,280 --> 00:18:02,239 Speaker 3: more time, and like, same as your business, go deeper, right, deeper, letter, 408 00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:05,520 Speaker 3: you go deeper than just like shooting fish in a barrel. 409 00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:07,840 Speaker 3: But then have the nights that are really fun and wild. 410 00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:09,919 Speaker 3: Those are magical nights. I'm not saying for you to 411 00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:12,479 Speaker 3: be like you know, in a corporate CEO of dating, 412 00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:14,000 Speaker 3: but a little bit of it. 413 00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:15,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, okay, a. 414 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:15,879 Speaker 2: Bit of it. 415 00:18:15,960 --> 00:18:18,760 Speaker 1: I do a great Yeah, No, I do. Yeah. 416 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,240 Speaker 2: Oh okay. So let's talk about this. 417 00:18:20,359 --> 00:18:23,760 Speaker 3: Let's talk about let's talk about pen pal texting styles. 418 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:27,320 Speaker 3: This happens at all ages. These men are morons. 419 00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:29,800 Speaker 1: They just want to text, and it's like, why are 420 00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:31,919 Speaker 1: you here, dah, And I'm like, that's what you call 421 00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:34,560 Speaker 1: bread crumbing, right, I call it pen paling. If we're 422 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:38,040 Speaker 1: just always too yeah and we never meet up, you're 423 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:40,399 Speaker 1: my pen pal for me. I'm like, let's make a 424 00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:42,960 Speaker 1: plan to hang out. If we're actively dating, that's a 425 00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:45,320 Speaker 1: different thing we're calling we're texting. But if we're not 426 00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:49,360 Speaker 1: actively hanging out. Stop texting me all this asinine shit, 427 00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:50,000 Speaker 1: you know. 428 00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:52,159 Speaker 3: Okay, so wait a second, slow this down because I 429 00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:54,960 Speaker 3: call it penpal intwo. You know my personality, and you 430 00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,679 Speaker 3: know I've said, like I'm about to say it to 431 00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:59,080 Speaker 3: the other guy. Maybe like I'm not the right Like 432 00:18:59,160 --> 00:19:01,160 Speaker 3: let's let's either get meet in person or like piece 433 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:02,960 Speaker 3: the fuck out, like you know what I mean, Like, 434 00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:05,959 Speaker 3: so let's hear what you do. So how many you 435 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:09,880 Speaker 3: go out with Joe last night? He texts you afterwards 436 00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,000 Speaker 3: that was really nice? Is that like probably something that 437 00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:12,520 Speaker 3: could happen. 438 00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:15,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I don't know, Bethany. 439 00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:18,440 Speaker 2: I am so like, I'm so wait a minute, when 440 00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:19,400 Speaker 2: you go out last night? 441 00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:21,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, no, he would say he would say that. But 442 00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:23,600 Speaker 1: either I'm like obsessed with him or I like never 443 00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:25,280 Speaker 1: want to see him again. I'm so decisive. 444 00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:28,120 Speaker 2: So great, No, but so you're obsessed with him. 445 00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:31,080 Speaker 1: But I think that you you are writing the message 446 00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,119 Speaker 1: you're saying everybody needs to hear because I think what 447 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:35,680 Speaker 1: happens to a lot of young people today is they'll 448 00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:38,119 Speaker 1: go in the apps, they'll match with someone and you 449 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:41,480 Speaker 1: wouldn't believe this because it's not your personality. But people 450 00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:44,600 Speaker 1: get stuck talking for three, four or five weeks without 451 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:45,399 Speaker 1: ever having met up. 452 00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:47,320 Speaker 2: They're losers. They're all losers. 453 00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:50,440 Speaker 1: They're talking, they're asking each other like, oh, like, how 454 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,320 Speaker 1: is your weekend? And it's like, for me, if I've 455 00:19:52,359 --> 00:19:54,840 Speaker 1: never met someone, I actually don't care how their weekend was, 456 00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:57,200 Speaker 1: So that's a hard question to ask, like. 457 00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:58,240 Speaker 2: They're a stranger. 458 00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:00,840 Speaker 1: This is the thing with social media and with these 459 00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:03,760 Speaker 1: apps is it creates this false sense of closeness and 460 00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:05,720 Speaker 1: it's a really big problem for young people. So I 461 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:08,680 Speaker 1: think it's important that you're saying this because young people 462 00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:11,200 Speaker 1: do listen to you about the dating stuff and it's 463 00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:14,560 Speaker 1: like you can't do that. You got to say like, oh, 464 00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:16,720 Speaker 1: I'm down to meet up for drinks, you know, because 465 00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:20,040 Speaker 1: people have a hard time being straightforward sometimes. I understand 466 00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,200 Speaker 1: that everybody's different, but I think an easy way to 467 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:24,840 Speaker 1: say it is like you just say, oh, well, you know, 468 00:20:25,280 --> 00:20:27,720 Speaker 1: it's I'm free Thursday. Why don't we meet for a drink? 469 00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:30,560 Speaker 1: Just fucking say it. And if they, you know, wobble 470 00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:31,480 Speaker 1: and they say, oh. 471 00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:33,480 Speaker 2: I don't know, let's get let's slow this down. Oh 472 00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:34,040 Speaker 2: this is serious. 473 00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:36,919 Speaker 3: This is more serious than I thought, Okay, this happened 474 00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:39,199 Speaker 3: to me, and this was an ungettable guy. Okay, so 475 00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,159 Speaker 3: that's why I'm going back. Okay, this is an this 476 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:45,320 Speaker 3: was an ungettable player guy. Okay, but I and I 477 00:20:45,359 --> 00:20:47,480 Speaker 3: didn't know that until later. Because sometimes someone's really good 478 00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:48,960 Speaker 3: looking to be like, I don't notice that. I can't 479 00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:50,960 Speaker 3: explain it. I think they're fine, but like everyone else 480 00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:53,600 Speaker 3: thinks they're such a big deal. This has happened. Then 481 00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,240 Speaker 3: this happened years ago. I was in a relationship with 482 00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:56,800 Speaker 3: someone who had never had a girlfriend, and he was 483 00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:59,159 Speaker 3: like the guy and it was the same. They're two 484 00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:03,800 Speaker 3: different dynamics, but they're similar. So this guy texted back 485 00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:06,639 Speaker 3: and forth and I just dropped the ball completely. He 486 00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:07,920 Speaker 3: had said what he wanted to. We were in a 487 00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:09,880 Speaker 3: FaceTime and then it never happened. And then he said 488 00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:11,959 Speaker 3: he was coming out to the Hamptons, and then he 489 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:15,879 Speaker 3: came and he texted me and he basically said something. 490 00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:18,080 Speaker 3: I think his daughter was a fan. I mean, I 491 00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:19,399 Speaker 3: know this, but I'm trying to like not make it. 492 00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:21,120 Speaker 3: Some people know who he was. His daughter was a fan. 493 00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:24,480 Speaker 3: And he texts me, Oh, he starts the new text 494 00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:27,440 Speaker 3: exchange something about im and my daughter's craving chicken salad 495 00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:29,240 Speaker 3: or something, and I'm like, oh, so I'm now I 496 00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:31,360 Speaker 3: realize the daughter is a fan. So he says something 497 00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:35,560 Speaker 3: about cute. That's very cute, loved it, No, perfect, We're great. 498 00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:39,080 Speaker 3: Then he says, well, if you want to get together, 499 00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:41,520 Speaker 3: et cetera, but this night, I could come alone or 500 00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:43,920 Speaker 3: I could bring my daughter. And now it's not about 501 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:47,240 Speaker 3: the content. I said, are you interested in a friend 502 00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:49,000 Speaker 3: or are you interested in dating? 503 00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:49,960 Speaker 2: Dating? 504 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:51,560 Speaker 3: I'm like, great, because I don't usually go on dates 505 00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:54,520 Speaker 3: of people's children, So like I like did that and 506 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:57,800 Speaker 3: then like it reset the fucking train on the track. Okay, 507 00:21:57,800 --> 00:22:00,240 Speaker 3: it's not about the content about what. It's about how 508 00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:02,439 Speaker 3: I just took a moment to figure out how to 509 00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:04,840 Speaker 3: slice through. And it happened years ago with a guy 510 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:07,000 Speaker 3: that it was like the same, like call you, I'll 511 00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:08,320 Speaker 3: text you, We're gonna go out Tuesday. 512 00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:09,159 Speaker 2: Then it's Saturday. 513 00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:10,800 Speaker 3: Actually, then it was Saturday, and I didn't hear from 514 00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:13,280 Speaker 3: him til four four thirty. I wasn't sure we'd been out, 515 00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:15,480 Speaker 3: like four or five times, we had slept together, like 516 00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:17,359 Speaker 3: I liked him, but it's like every time it was 517 00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:19,960 Speaker 3: two steps forward, four steps back, two steps forward. So 518 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:23,000 Speaker 3: that day I was like, Hi, I need to be evolving. 519 00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:25,320 Speaker 3: I don't need to get married. I don't need to 520 00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:27,119 Speaker 3: have a ring on my face. I need to be 521 00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:30,200 Speaker 3: evolving in all areas of my life, in work, in relationship. 522 00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:32,359 Speaker 3: And he was like, I've never had a serious girlfriend. 523 00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:34,040 Speaker 3: I don't want something serious. I go, great, then call it, 524 00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:36,199 Speaker 3: call the fight. He goes, well, wait, but but we 525 00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:38,920 Speaker 3: could go right, No, call it. This is what I said. 526 00:22:39,320 --> 00:22:42,119 Speaker 3: The point is then we were together for two years. 527 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:43,040 Speaker 1: I love that. 528 00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:46,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, there's a moment where this is like, I don't 529 00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:49,080 Speaker 3: need to be dicking around. And so this moment with 530 00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:51,520 Speaker 3: the guy from Florida, and trust me, it'll get that 531 00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:53,600 Speaker 3: train fucking right on the tracks because they're scared too. 532 00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:56,520 Speaker 3: They're as insecure as we are. They're big losers like 533 00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:59,960 Speaker 3: we are. So this guy, when I say hi, being 534 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,120 Speaker 3: a penpal is touching story and adorable, but like I'm 535 00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:06,080 Speaker 3: kind of a meet a person or you know, I'll 536 00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:07,320 Speaker 3: see you want to see it kind of goal. 537 00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:10,159 Speaker 1: I love that. Or this guy will run away and 538 00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:12,679 Speaker 1: that's great and that's fine because then you know, yeah, then. 539 00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:15,680 Speaker 3: You heard, yeah here we did. So you don't need 540 00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:18,120 Speaker 3: to be in purgatory at all. And when you get 541 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:21,400 Speaker 3: home from that date, you say to the guy, that's 542 00:23:21,440 --> 00:23:23,840 Speaker 3: your feminine I had a really nice time tonight because 543 00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:26,439 Speaker 3: they spent money. Yeah, but you say it. Girls are 544 00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:29,200 Speaker 3: always waiting. We're all sitting around with our hands out 545 00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:33,040 Speaker 3: waiting as if we just deserve everything, and we do. 546 00:23:33,119 --> 00:23:36,680 Speaker 3: But they're people too. You do it once though, now 547 00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:38,480 Speaker 3: it's up to you. You don't text me tomorrow, and 548 00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:39,640 Speaker 3: now we're fighting. 549 00:23:39,480 --> 00:23:42,400 Speaker 1: Then yeah, then you know right? Yeah, No, I think 550 00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:45,199 Speaker 1: that's absolutely right. I'm a big fan of just like 551 00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:47,879 Speaker 1: figuring it out, like getting you know, just saying the 552 00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:49,520 Speaker 1: thing and being like, hey, what are we doing? Because 553 00:23:50,160 --> 00:23:51,879 Speaker 1: I just like I don't want to waste time like 554 00:23:51,920 --> 00:23:53,800 Speaker 1: and also I'm I'm a shoot from the hip kind 555 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:55,879 Speaker 1: of gal. I just like I like to get it 556 00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:57,760 Speaker 1: out there. So I think that's great advice. 557 00:23:58,000 --> 00:23:59,400 Speaker 2: But I think it's the energy too. 558 00:23:59,520 --> 00:23:59,760 Speaker 1: Yeah. 559 00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:02,959 Speaker 3: That guy Joey Zazig who does the relationship stuff, how 560 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:05,959 Speaker 3: he did a post and he wrote on it something 561 00:24:06,080 --> 00:24:08,359 Speaker 3: like like I'm texting you right now. I'm not waiting, 562 00:24:08,359 --> 00:24:10,240 Speaker 3: I'm not playing games, and like he told the guy 563 00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:12,879 Speaker 3: and I was like, am I comments I go be that. 564 00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,880 Speaker 3: You don't need to say that totally be that if 565 00:24:15,920 --> 00:24:18,920 Speaker 3: someone texts you eight hours later every time I don't 566 00:24:18,960 --> 00:24:21,840 Speaker 3: agree in the game playing match, that energy you text me. 567 00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:24,520 Speaker 3: Steve Cohen, Mark Cuban. Billionaires that I know that are 568 00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:28,240 Speaker 3: leaders of industry, they text immediately back, all of them. 569 00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,919 Speaker 3: I'm not about game playing, but it's not even that 570 00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:33,479 Speaker 3: you're not too fucking busy. The smartest people I know 571 00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:37,119 Speaker 3: are texting right back. So if the guy doesn't text 572 00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:40,080 Speaker 3: back every time for eight hours, that's not the guy 573 00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:42,040 Speaker 3: for you have to retrain him. 574 00:24:42,080 --> 00:24:44,160 Speaker 2: He's a loser. Now your guy, he's a loser. 575 00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:46,200 Speaker 1: That is the good part about being in my thirties 576 00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:48,359 Speaker 1: is like I don't I don't allow for any of 577 00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:51,000 Speaker 1: that shit. I'm just like, oh, you're not texting me back, okay, 578 00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:53,560 Speaker 1: you don't like me? Like I'm good. Like you just 579 00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:56,000 Speaker 1: are a little bit more self aware and it's a 580 00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:59,159 Speaker 1: lot more free because in my twenties I was like, oh, yeah, wait, 581 00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:01,960 Speaker 1: eight eight hours for text why not? I yeah, twelve hours, 582 00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:04,200 Speaker 1: make it three days, like I'll wait a wow, my phone. 583 00:25:04,440 --> 00:25:07,240 Speaker 1: And now I'm like, you know, when a guy likes you, 584 00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:09,280 Speaker 1: like they're texting you, they're like, when's the next day? 585 00:25:09,359 --> 00:25:11,760 Speaker 1: Let me take you out, like you know. So it's 586 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:16,160 Speaker 1: just like allow yourself to have that realization and only 587 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:18,360 Speaker 1: hang with people who like you. It's not that not 588 00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:18,840 Speaker 1: that company. 589 00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:22,359 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not that often that there's a course correct. 590 00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:25,320 Speaker 3: Like even those guys that I had to do that with, 591 00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,400 Speaker 3: we knew that they kind of liked you in some. 592 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:30,360 Speaker 2: Way, in some way. It's not. 593 00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:33,639 Speaker 3: You can't make a dog a cat, But you also 594 00:25:33,720 --> 00:25:36,120 Speaker 3: don't need to alienate, Like you can keep them where 595 00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:39,600 Speaker 3: they're on the burner where why would you shut options down? 596 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:41,760 Speaker 3: I think a lot of girls do that too. They 597 00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:45,120 Speaker 3: get drunk, they do something, they shut it down completely, 598 00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:49,560 Speaker 3: Like it's okay to say something and be a little direct, 599 00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:51,800 Speaker 3: but you haven't completely burned the house down. 600 00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:52,400 Speaker 2: There's no reason. 601 00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:55,560 Speaker 1: You never know, Yeah, you never know. Yeah, And that's 602 00:25:55,560 --> 00:25:58,400 Speaker 1: something that I'm actually learning. I can be a bit 603 00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:00,520 Speaker 1: black and white with things. I can be like, oh, like, 604 00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:03,000 Speaker 1: well he did this thing, you know whatever, And honestly, 605 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:06,120 Speaker 1: recently I've been like, to your point, keep them around, 606 00:26:06,359 --> 00:26:08,000 Speaker 1: maybe you'll come back, Maybe I'll need to go for 607 00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:10,119 Speaker 1: drinks in a couple of weeks. Maybe just keep them around. 608 00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,080 Speaker 1: I'm doing it and I love. 609 00:26:11,880 --> 00:26:13,680 Speaker 3: It, and you should do that with ex boyfriends. And 610 00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:15,800 Speaker 3: you should have a Viking stove and something should be 611 00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:17,680 Speaker 3: on simmer, and somebody should be on boil, and somebody 612 00:26:17,680 --> 00:26:19,880 Speaker 3: should be taken off the stove. You have a six 613 00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:23,400 Speaker 3: burner Viking stove, and it's. 614 00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:25,840 Speaker 1: I have a six burner Viking stove. That is that 615 00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:28,640 Speaker 1: is iconic. And that's that's what I'm keeping up here. 616 00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:29,399 Speaker 2: One hundred percent. 617 00:26:42,359 --> 00:26:44,080 Speaker 1: I've gotten a lot out of this episode. This is 618 00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:46,320 Speaker 1: what I came in wanting a lot, and I got 619 00:26:46,359 --> 00:26:46,640 Speaker 1: a lot. 620 00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:51,000 Speaker 3: So I wait, but the last thing about you being Wait, 621 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:52,879 Speaker 3: you just said something and it's about your age and 622 00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:56,840 Speaker 3: about saying oh, the most important thing you said is 623 00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,480 Speaker 3: like you don't like me. It's okay, Like, think about 624 00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:03,880 Speaker 3: the opposite. Think about how many good looking, smart, successful, 625 00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:07,719 Speaker 3: funny guys that you that dress well that you just 626 00:27:07,760 --> 00:27:11,600 Speaker 3: don't like. Yeah, I'm at this really handsome doctor recently, 627 00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:15,000 Speaker 3: like a surgeon, like so good looking, so poised, so educated, 628 00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:17,840 Speaker 3: so everything. I just I don't know why it didn't vibe, 629 00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:19,600 Speaker 3: but so like that could be the opp Its doesn't 630 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,080 Speaker 3: mean you're not pretty. It doesn't mean you're not attractive. 631 00:27:22,119 --> 00:27:24,560 Speaker 3: It doesn't mean you're not everything. That guy just may 632 00:27:24,640 --> 00:27:26,320 Speaker 3: you may not just be he just may it like you. 633 00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:29,040 Speaker 1: It's okay, it's okay. You can be the ripest, juiciest peach. 634 00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:31,119 Speaker 1: There's still gonna be someone who doesn't like peaches. It's okay, 635 00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:35,399 Speaker 1: it's look at that. It's okay, Jimstone, that's amazing. 636 00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:36,320 Speaker 2: It's good. 637 00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:38,639 Speaker 1: It's like, we'll live. We'll live. You don't like me, 638 00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:40,760 Speaker 1: I'll live. There's a lot of people I don't like too, 639 00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:41,879 Speaker 1: so it's it's all good. 640 00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:45,080 Speaker 3: Wait, okay, did we forget anything? Hold on, yes, wait, 641 00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:46,800 Speaker 3: hold on, I want to talk about your tips. 642 00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:47,399 Speaker 2: Okay. 643 00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:52,640 Speaker 3: Men date like stockbrokers, women date like venture capitalists. 644 00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:55,439 Speaker 1: Go well, it kind of relates to what we were 645 00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:58,760 Speaker 1: talking about. But women they see the potential. They're like, 646 00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:00,840 Speaker 1: you know, if I could just get him a new job, 647 00:28:00,840 --> 00:28:03,600 Speaker 1: a new haircut, anew this and knew that, then I 648 00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:06,359 Speaker 1: could refurbish him and I could make him something great. 649 00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:09,400 Speaker 1: Men are buying what they see right there. They're like, oh, 650 00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:11,520 Speaker 1: this is her right now, this is what I'm this 651 00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:14,560 Speaker 1: is what I want, and I want this right now today. 652 00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:17,119 Speaker 1: Women are more like, oh, like they take it to 653 00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,639 Speaker 1: the board members they're friends, and they're like, Okay, now, 654 00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:22,000 Speaker 1: I know he looks like a troll here, but this 655 00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:23,440 Speaker 1: is what I'm gonna do, and this is what I'm 656 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:25,600 Speaker 1: going to change, and blah blah blah blah, and in 657 00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:27,440 Speaker 1: six months it's going to be a different person. 658 00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:28,320 Speaker 2: Okay. 659 00:28:28,359 --> 00:28:31,280 Speaker 3: So mine for that was from Sex Lives and Videotape, 660 00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:33,560 Speaker 3: which is a movie from the eighties that you must watch. 661 00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:37,920 Speaker 3: It's unbelievable. And the line was, and I don't know 662 00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:41,760 Speaker 3: which part was first, but men learn to love the 663 00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:46,120 Speaker 3: women they're attracted to. Women learned to be attracted to 664 00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:47,440 Speaker 3: the men that they love. 665 00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:48,800 Speaker 1: I love that. 666 00:28:49,040 --> 00:28:50,800 Speaker 3: And I thought of you when I heard one of 667 00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:53,000 Speaker 3: your things, and I thought of this, and I'm glad 668 00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:53,560 Speaker 3: you didn't know it. 669 00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:54,440 Speaker 2: So remember that one. 670 00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:57,520 Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's really good and really accurate. 671 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:02,240 Speaker 3: Wow. Okay, next, men think women have high standards, but 672 00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:05,920 Speaker 3: then men don't even ask them a question on the date. 673 00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:09,080 Speaker 1: So I think it's like, right now, the vibe on 674 00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:12,160 Speaker 1: the internet, vibe on TikTok is like, oh, women's standards 675 00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,680 Speaker 1: are so high. They're not so high. A lot of 676 00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:17,240 Speaker 1: women will go on a date with a guy and 677 00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:18,400 Speaker 1: he won't even ask you're saying. 678 00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:20,520 Speaker 3: They're not even walking up right, They're not even like 679 00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:21,760 Speaker 3: they're not even like what do you do? 680 00:29:21,920 --> 00:29:24,240 Speaker 1: Or like oh, yeah whatever. Like I once went on 681 00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:26,200 Speaker 1: a date I think it was last year, and I 682 00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:28,760 Speaker 1: timed it because I got the vibe right away, and 683 00:29:28,800 --> 00:29:30,960 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm gonna do an experiment. We spoke 684 00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:33,440 Speaker 1: for forty two minutes before he asked me a single 685 00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:34,360 Speaker 1: question about myself. 686 00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:36,880 Speaker 2: By the way, that happened to me recently too. 687 00:29:37,640 --> 00:29:40,880 Speaker 1: Yes, I couldn't believe it, not even a like oh 688 00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:41,880 Speaker 1: is your drink good? 689 00:29:42,000 --> 00:29:45,880 Speaker 2: Or oh you've been here before? Forty two minutes. Yes, 690 00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:48,520 Speaker 2: I was like, No, that's a good test that people 691 00:29:48,560 --> 00:29:48,880 Speaker 2: have to do. 692 00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:52,520 Speaker 3: That's brilliant. And but by the way, no, women have 693 00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:55,960 Speaker 3: no fucking standards. Women will gaslight themselves into thinking a 694 00:29:56,120 --> 00:29:59,880 Speaker 3: troll is nice. Oh but but I've seen girls of 695 00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:03,480 Speaker 3: social media. Look, he sent me a flower to my 696 00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:08,920 Speaker 3: hotel room. Okay, okay, all right, like like like flower 697 00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:12,600 Speaker 3: like yeah, like but the beggars, we're beggars. 698 00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:15,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, I really, I really don't think women's standards are 699 00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:16,920 Speaker 1: too high at all at all. 700 00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:20,280 Speaker 2: Oh not, no, not, it's. 701 00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:25,840 Speaker 3: Not our it's not no, No, I validate, I validate 702 00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:26,800 Speaker 3: and set limits. 703 00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:27,680 Speaker 2: I tell you no. 704 00:30:27,880 --> 00:30:32,560 Speaker 3: Okay, if you are single, no, yo, women date down, 705 00:30:33,160 --> 00:30:36,160 Speaker 3: dumb themselves down, give a guy a cookie for doing 706 00:30:36,240 --> 00:30:39,480 Speaker 3: absolutely fucking nothing, bragg to their friends about something a 707 00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:41,320 Speaker 3: guy did that they don't deserve a cookie for that 708 00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:44,160 Speaker 3: was absolutely nothing, and we're it's like you see, it's 709 00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:48,720 Speaker 3: just so ridiculous. So okay, if you're single, you need 710 00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:49,880 Speaker 3: single friends. 711 00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:53,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's it's very difficult if all of your 712 00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:55,520 Speaker 1: friends are married, all of your friends have kids, and 713 00:30:55,560 --> 00:30:57,800 Speaker 1: you're the only single one and you're like looking around 714 00:30:57,800 --> 00:30:59,880 Speaker 1: on a Friday night. If you don't have a couple 715 00:30:59,840 --> 00:31:02,800 Speaker 1: of single girlfriends to get together with, it's very difficult. 716 00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:06,240 Speaker 1: And so I really advocate you've got to make new friends. 717 00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:08,560 Speaker 1: You've got to keep adding people to the fold. I 718 00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:10,880 Speaker 1: love my high school friends, I love my college friends. 719 00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,640 Speaker 1: You can never make new old friends. But you also 720 00:31:13,720 --> 00:31:16,520 Speaker 1: have to be adding so that you're not lonely, because 721 00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:18,560 Speaker 1: otherwise you can feel so you're not a odd. 722 00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:20,600 Speaker 2: Leaky yes, but. 723 00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:24,920 Speaker 3: When you're with a bunch of couples, they're all fucking 724 00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:28,000 Speaker 3: bored and the first thing they want to do is 725 00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,640 Speaker 3: set you up if you work the men. So you 726 00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:33,040 Speaker 3: really got to work the room, and you got to 727 00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:36,360 Speaker 3: find a delivery method that doesn't give desperate. 728 00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 1: You gotta make it be their idea. You got to 729 00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:41,280 Speaker 1: sparkle so much that they're like, yeah, are you single? 730 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:42,720 Speaker 1: I got a guy? Yeah? 731 00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:45,560 Speaker 3: Well yes, but if they don't, you must make sure 732 00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,760 Speaker 3: that every stone is unturned because you just they're not 733 00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:51,880 Speaker 3: thinking of you and this at all, and even if 734 00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:53,960 Speaker 3: they are, they won't think of the guys. So you 735 00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:57,040 Speaker 3: have to really like take five minutes job the men. Remember, 736 00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:59,120 Speaker 3: they'll have a guy even if you are in the end. 737 00:31:59,160 --> 00:32:01,760 Speaker 3: Once they know that they have a guy, you will 738 00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:03,440 Speaker 3: be a little desperate. You want to text them. You 739 00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:05,760 Speaker 3: want them to do it follow through because it doesn't matter. 740 00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:06,880 Speaker 3: Once you get on the date with a guy, the 741 00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:09,520 Speaker 3: desperate's over. It doesn't matter. Like you need to ask 742 00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:12,800 Speaker 3: the questions and if you're going somewhere, you make it work. So, yes, 743 00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:15,960 Speaker 3: you work the couples. Though, Okay, she's tired of the 744 00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:18,920 Speaker 3: articles about women leveling up and going to Okay, let's. 745 00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:22,080 Speaker 1: Hear that there's been a slew of articles about and 746 00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:24,440 Speaker 1: you know it's a big discourse right now, like, oh, 747 00:32:24,480 --> 00:32:27,080 Speaker 1: women are. You know, we're smarter, we're buying more homes, 748 00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:30,920 Speaker 1: we're at college more, we're outperforming men at work, and 749 00:32:31,160 --> 00:32:35,080 Speaker 1: it's all like very negative. The headline is not American 750 00:32:35,120 --> 00:32:37,920 Speaker 1: men are undesirable, American men are falling behind. The headline 751 00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:41,520 Speaker 1: is always like women outperforming like men, as if we've 752 00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:44,160 Speaker 1: done something wrong. Like that's the tone, And I think 753 00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:46,680 Speaker 1: it's just really interesting to see how they're all phrasing this. 754 00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:50,200 Speaker 1: It's like we are excelling and the men are falling behind, 755 00:32:50,240 --> 00:32:53,040 Speaker 1: and it is an imbalance right now. But I just 756 00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,440 Speaker 1: would urge all these journalists to be careful. Like there 757 00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:57,360 Speaker 1: was a big article in the Wall Street Journal. It was, 758 00:32:57,840 --> 00:32:59,680 Speaker 1: you know, the way it was phrased, it was like 759 00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:01,800 Speaker 1: as if we were committing a crime because we are 760 00:33:02,080 --> 00:33:05,000 Speaker 1: leveling up so hard right now. The truth of the 761 00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:07,440 Speaker 1: matter is these men are falling behind, Like why can't 762 00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:09,080 Speaker 1: they meet us where we are and why can't we 763 00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:11,560 Speaker 1: focus on that versus being like did you buy a 764 00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:13,520 Speaker 1: house by yourself? That's why you're single. 765 00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:17,800 Speaker 3: Also, I think it's not really it's a cousin, a 766 00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:20,479 Speaker 3: distant cousin to that, but it reminded me of I 767 00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:24,680 Speaker 3: really can't stand like the Girl Boss give a girl 768 00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:27,880 Speaker 3: a cookie for being successful bullshit, Like it's like. 769 00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:31,200 Speaker 2: This girl Boss work it like I despise. 770 00:33:31,640 --> 00:33:35,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, girl Boss era came and went because it's not sustainable. 771 00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:39,200 Speaker 1: And I think if we really want to see equality, 772 00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:40,960 Speaker 1: then we need to not give it like a cute 773 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:43,600 Speaker 1: sa name and just like acknowledge women when they're doing 774 00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:46,719 Speaker 1: amazing things and it just like because they're doing amazing 775 00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:49,959 Speaker 1: things and not give it some name and then like 776 00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:52,680 Speaker 1: the name turned sour, like we just need to make 777 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,600 Speaker 1: it a mainstay, like women are doing great things, let's 778 00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:56,280 Speaker 1: talk about that. 779 00:33:56,600 --> 00:34:00,080 Speaker 3: It's like this weird frame that is totally unnecessary and 780 00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:01,320 Speaker 3: it's also condescending. 781 00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:02,320 Speaker 1: It is condescending. 782 00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:05,800 Speaker 3: It's condescending. I die that you said. I've seen this 783 00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:09,360 Speaker 3: on these apps. The citizen of the world go fuck yourself, 784 00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:13,319 Speaker 3: a man of everywhere, Like, no, what's so wrong with 785 00:34:13,360 --> 00:34:13,960 Speaker 3: these What is. 786 00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:16,320 Speaker 1: Wrong with you? Like, what is wrong with you, citizen 787 00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:17,439 Speaker 1: of the world? Oh my god? 788 00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:19,880 Speaker 3: Like no, but what that means you have a beanie 789 00:34:19,960 --> 00:34:22,640 Speaker 3: cap on in August and you like like are sitting 790 00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:25,160 Speaker 3: posing with the Dali Lama doing a yoga stand on 791 00:34:25,200 --> 00:34:25,600 Speaker 3: a cliff. 792 00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:26,479 Speaker 2: Get out of here. 793 00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:30,120 Speaker 3: We're not interested. We want caviat and a glass of wine. 794 00:34:30,320 --> 00:34:32,920 Speaker 3: Fuck off, we don't want a man of the world. 795 00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:35,520 Speaker 1: Okay, I don't know what it is about us. It's 796 00:34:35,520 --> 00:34:39,439 Speaker 1: our ability to carry children, it's our connection to all women. 797 00:34:39,640 --> 00:34:40,800 Speaker 2: I don't know. We change. 798 00:34:40,840 --> 00:34:44,000 Speaker 1: Women are always evolving like women. You know, you even 799 00:34:44,080 --> 00:34:48,560 Speaker 1: like to use housewives, like, think about how much everybody's changed. 800 00:34:49,120 --> 00:34:52,600 Speaker 1: Women just change. Men they don't change. If there's something 801 00:34:52,600 --> 00:34:55,080 Speaker 1: you don't like about a guy, you know, a core 802 00:34:55,160 --> 00:34:58,520 Speaker 1: thing of his personality is, let's say he's he's cheap 803 00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:01,600 Speaker 1: or something that's not to change after ten years of marriage. 804 00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,600 Speaker 1: So if it bothers you know that it will continue 805 00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:05,200 Speaker 1: to bother you. 806 00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:08,240 Speaker 3: That's part of the nuance and the essence of someone 807 00:35:08,239 --> 00:35:11,200 Speaker 3: where you're like pretending you're a homebody because the other 808 00:35:11,239 --> 00:35:14,040 Speaker 3: person then you're gonna bust out later in your relationship. 809 00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:17,239 Speaker 3: But I'm going to say this dynamic that you need 810 00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:19,319 Speaker 3: to hear because it's someone it's something that a young 811 00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:21,640 Speaker 3: woman needs to hear more than my age of one. 812 00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:22,440 Speaker 2: My age knows it. 813 00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:23,000 Speaker 1: Okay. 814 00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:25,480 Speaker 3: And at the point that I sort of sort of 815 00:35:25,480 --> 00:35:29,080 Speaker 3: did this research experiment unintentionally, out of about ten men 816 00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:34,320 Speaker 3: I had met four who had full custody of their children, 817 00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:40,320 Speaker 3: because that's a massive, massive thing to get custody, okay, 818 00:35:40,920 --> 00:35:45,080 Speaker 3: because their exes had fallen off the deep end in 819 00:35:45,160 --> 00:35:47,759 Speaker 3: some way. So it was either pills and eating disorder, 820 00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:50,360 Speaker 3: drinking the combination of all of it drugs. 821 00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:50,800 Speaker 2: Okay. 822 00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:53,239 Speaker 3: And I said to them, and I asked a couple 823 00:35:53,239 --> 00:35:55,000 Speaker 3: of them, and they said that I was bullseye. I 824 00:35:55,080 --> 00:35:57,040 Speaker 3: said to them, So let me guess this is what happens. 825 00:35:57,080 --> 00:35:57,400 Speaker 2: Okay. 826 00:35:57,800 --> 00:36:02,640 Speaker 3: Woman meets man and she's attractive, and she wants the things, 827 00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:04,640 Speaker 3: and she gets to brag to her friends like I 828 00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:06,799 Speaker 3: don't work, and I, you know, get the bag and 829 00:36:06,840 --> 00:36:09,200 Speaker 3: the things and the gym and the workout outfit and 830 00:36:09,239 --> 00:36:11,520 Speaker 3: the making dinner and the kid. Okay, Now the kids 831 00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:14,840 Speaker 3: are getting older. The man is having a version of 832 00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:17,480 Speaker 3: a Jeff Bezos glow up, like he's starting to work out. 833 00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:20,239 Speaker 3: His business is thriving, he's getting smarter, he's out, he's 834 00:36:20,280 --> 00:36:23,040 Speaker 3: talking to people, he's talking to business people. He's got 835 00:36:23,040 --> 00:36:25,520 Speaker 3: a big swinging dick, he's got the nice car. He 836 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:27,640 Speaker 3: keeps moving in that direction. He's buying her all the 837 00:36:27,680 --> 00:36:30,000 Speaker 3: shit she wants. She's getting more and more bored. They 838 00:36:30,000 --> 00:36:33,359 Speaker 3: have less to talk about. She's devolving. Her kids need 839 00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:37,000 Speaker 3: her less. Now she turns to substances. She's drinking and 840 00:36:37,080 --> 00:36:40,240 Speaker 3: she is. They don't have the same amount of common 841 00:36:40,600 --> 00:36:44,840 Speaker 3: and she doesn't have purpose. Now she's older, she's not 842 00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:46,840 Speaker 3: as relevant in the work force. She can't even insert it, 843 00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:49,080 Speaker 3: even if she ever was in while she was pre wed. 844 00:36:49,640 --> 00:36:51,400 Speaker 3: And now these two are on two different pages. She 845 00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:53,400 Speaker 3: starts getting fucked up. She makes a full out herself 846 00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:55,760 Speaker 3: on the call to sack parties or at the charity 847 00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:58,680 Speaker 3: events or on the vacations, and this is a major 848 00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:02,080 Speaker 3: divergent path that goes on. And the guy is like, wait, 849 00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:05,240 Speaker 3: we signed up for this shit together. You wanted the stuff, 850 00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:08,080 Speaker 3: you wanted, the dinners, you wanted the fucking pilates, and 851 00:37:08,120 --> 00:37:10,440 Speaker 3: I gave it to you. But he got more bored 852 00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:12,680 Speaker 3: of her ass because that's all she gave a shit about. 853 00:37:12,880 --> 00:37:14,560 Speaker 3: And he's going to offer her a little business if 854 00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:17,320 Speaker 3: she wants her to do a charity and token bullshit, 855 00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:20,440 Speaker 3: And she's now resenting him because he's got things to 856 00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:22,480 Speaker 3: do and go places and do business trips and talk 857 00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:22,840 Speaker 3: to people. 858 00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:25,280 Speaker 2: He looks better. He's rich and he's smart. 859 00:37:25,600 --> 00:37:28,440 Speaker 3: Because he's been working on his mental and this is 860 00:37:28,480 --> 00:37:31,680 Speaker 3: a major thing. That's why women have to have their 861 00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:33,480 Speaker 3: own shit and work. Not because I'm trying to be 862 00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:36,759 Speaker 3: against what anyone chooses, because you cannot see what's gonna be. 863 00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:38,759 Speaker 3: When you're doing pre wet and you just want the 864 00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:40,600 Speaker 3: wedding and the honeymoon and the money and the rink. 865 00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:42,400 Speaker 3: You don't know it's gonna come down. 866 00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:43,880 Speaker 1: The pike, damn. 867 00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:45,279 Speaker 2: So that's what I have to say to you. 868 00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:47,640 Speaker 1: I can see how that will. I mean, I feel 869 00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:50,360 Speaker 1: like that's played out on house in different franchises of 870 00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:51,120 Speaker 1: Housewives a future. 871 00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:52,520 Speaker 2: That's the entire exact. That's it too. 872 00:37:52,640 --> 00:37:54,680 Speaker 3: So there's a bunch of triantle but yeah, yeah, so 873 00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:55,720 Speaker 3: that's what we got tanks. 874 00:37:55,760 --> 00:37:58,200 Speaker 1: So we covered a lot of ground. I honestly feel 875 00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:00,480 Speaker 1: like I got therapy. This was fabulous. Thank you for 876 00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:03,680 Speaker 1: you wisdom and just for being you. Thank you, thank you, 877 00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:05,920 Speaker 1: congratulations on all this stuff. I can't wait to hear more. 878 00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:25,120 Speaker 2: Yay