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Speaker 1: Hey, John, you're under arrest. Oh no, don't do it.

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Speaker 1: I'm an og okay start time podcast host. I don't care.

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Speaker 1: I'm making sure that you stay here for the next

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Speaker 1: two minutes.

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Speaker 2: All right, I'll be detained for the two more minutes

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Speaker 2: before we get into this episode.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we got some ads coming up, so stick around.

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Speaker 2: Stick around. My husband is upset that spending time together

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Speaker 2: makes me happy.

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Speaker 1: How dare you like being with your husband?

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Speaker 2: Here's the TLDR of my relationship. Husband and I have

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Speaker 2: been together for nine years, married for two and a half.

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Speaker 2: We're both about thirty. We had a baby fourteen months ago.

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Speaker 2: The pregnancy was a surprise birth control failure, but we

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Speaker 2: both wanted kids and we're happy. We had discussed ethical

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Speaker 2: non monogamy in the past, but put the discussion on

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Speaker 2: hold during the pregnancy. And by the way, this comes

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Speaker 2: from user alien Flowers and if you want to submit

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Speaker 2: your own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime

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Speaker 2: subvert it another bullet point here. After I gave birth,

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Speaker 2: my husband brought it up again and started really pushing

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Speaker 2: for polyamory. He also took on extra work as I

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Speaker 2: had to stay home due to day care costs eating

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Speaker 2: up more than my monthly paycheck could cover. He started

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Speaker 2: pushing me off onto his family and wouldn't ever be

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Speaker 2: home to help me or give me a break. He

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Speaker 2: told me to go to his mom for a break,

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Speaker 2: and all he was good for was bringing home money.

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Speaker 2: Throughout all of postpartum, he's basically insinuated, if not outright

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Speaker 2: said that he doesn't want me to rely on him

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Speaker 2: or want him around. At six months postpartum, he pushed

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Speaker 2: for us to open our relationship. I hated it. He

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Speaker 2: was disappointed when we closed it after a month. I

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Speaker 2: also went back to school full time at this and

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Speaker 2: have maintained a four point zero since. My gosh, we've

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Speaker 2: been in couples therapy for about five or six months now.

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Speaker 2: We each have our own therapists too. Maybe was also

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Speaker 2: EBF and I still nurse her two to three times

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Speaker 2: a day and plan to do so until at least

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Speaker 2: eighteen months or so.

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Speaker 1: Exclusive breastfeeding.

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Speaker 2: All right, that's the background. Now we're in therapy, and

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Speaker 2: I thought it was working. The last few weeks. He's

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Speaker 2: worked less and made time to hang out with me

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Speaker 2: and our baby more. He's planned outings for us, taken

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Speaker 2: us for bike rides, been home to cook dinner and

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Speaker 2: do chores, and to watch the baby or slash toddler

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Speaker 2: so I can have some me time or some friend time.

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Speaker 2: It's been so nice, and I mentioned to him that

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Speaker 2: it made me happy and thanked him for doing all

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Speaker 2: this and making progress like we've talked about in therapy.

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Speaker 2: On our walk this morning and in our last therapy session,

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Speaker 2: he said it made him disappointed that I was so

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Speaker 2: happy with spending all this time together. He said that

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Speaker 2: he'd notice since he stopped working so much and hanging

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Speaker 2: out with us more at home, that I'd been happier,

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Speaker 2: and that it just proved to him that he was

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Speaker 2: the problem. He said that everything he wants is a problem,

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Speaker 2: and when he doesn't do or get what he wants,

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Speaker 2: then I'm happy. He said, he's happy spending time with

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Speaker 2: me and our baby, but he's disappointed too.

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Speaker 3: Okay, whoa so is he saying that everything that he

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Speaker 3: wants is to just be working all the time.

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Speaker 2: I don't even know what to think of this, which, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I kind of agree. I'm just hurt that I've dedicated

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Speaker 2: so much time and energy to this relationship, to raising

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Speaker 2: our baby, who is absolutely incredible, and that I've been

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Speaker 2: told I shouldn't be asking more of him, and that

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Speaker 2: when I do spend time together, he might be happy

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Speaker 2: in the moment, but seems to look back at it

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Speaker 2: with regret and disappointment.

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Speaker 3: Okay, so that's definitely something that can be salvaged. I

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Speaker 3: feel maybe by going to therapy. If you're happy in

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Speaker 3: the moment, focus on that. Why why are you feeling

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Speaker 3: this regret now? I don't know if he's even happy

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Speaker 3: to be with me. It certainly doesn't feel like it.

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Speaker 3: It feels like he sees our relationship as holding him back.

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Speaker 3: But when I try to tell him this, he just

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Speaker 3: says it feels like I don't trust him. He says

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Speaker 3: that lack of trust makes him not want to try.

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Speaker 3: I tell him, I'm just I'm trying to trust him,

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Speaker 3: but he keeps doing the same pattern of spending time

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Speaker 3: with us and then pulling away, and then the cycle repeats.

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Speaker 1: I don't want him to pull away.

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Speaker 2: I don't want him to tell me I shouldn't need him,

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Speaker 2: and that's when I could start trusting him again. Right now,

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Speaker 2: I'm always waiting for him to stop engaging with me

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Speaker 2: and just always be away. He struggles a lot with

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Speaker 2: negative self talk and negative self image, So I try

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Speaker 2: not to say negative things when describing what I want

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Speaker 2: out of our relationship or how I'm hurt. But then

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Speaker 2: he just puts words in my mouth, feels self pity,

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Speaker 2: shuts down, and stops talking to me for a day

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Speaker 2: or more. So what do I do from here? How

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Speaker 2: do I even address this? What do I say to

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Speaker 2: our therapist? And there are some very relevant comments here,

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Speaker 2: I'm sure op on her husband helping her with her

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Speaker 2: postpartum depression. OPI says, there was a time over the

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Speaker 2: summer when my PPD was really bad. One day, I

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Speaker 2: asked him to come home from work early. Another day,

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Speaker 2: a week or so later, I asked him to stay

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Speaker 2: home entirely. He's a construction worker, so not always with

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Speaker 2: the same company, and that company didn't ask him to

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Speaker 2: come to the next job with them. He said that

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Speaker 2: after he left and stayed home to help me, they

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Speaker 2: all treated him differently and sort of isolated him. Instead

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Speaker 2: of being upset with those misogynistic a holes, he was

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Speaker 2: upset with me and sometimes still brings it up as

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Speaker 2: an example of how I can't handle myself and the

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Speaker 2: baby on my own.

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Speaker 1: No, like should she should she have to do that.

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Speaker 2: I've told him his frustrations are misplaced, that I shouldn't

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Speaker 2: be blamed for needing him, and if a job can't

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Speaker 2: be understanding that a new dad may need to help

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Speaker 2: his wife and child, that it's better he doesn't work

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Speaker 2: with them anymore. He just gets more frustrated. Caring for

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Speaker 2: our kid is our job, not my job. A commenter

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Speaker 2: says it sounds like he didn't really want to be

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Speaker 2: a monogamous partner or a parent. He may have just

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Speaker 2: been ticking off boxes on the life milestone list, like

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Speaker 2: getting married and having kids. Either way, at least he's

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Speaker 2: gained some self awareness and realized he's been a crappy

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Speaker 2: husband and father. He's shown you a pattern that is

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Speaker 2: likely to repeat itself. Opie says, I keep telling him this,

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Speaker 2: that for the past year, this pattern has repeated. He'll

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Speaker 2: be more involved for a couple of weeks than throw

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Speaker 2: himself back into work, and I'll have no support from him.

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Speaker 2: He asked me today how long it will take for

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Speaker 2: me to trust him, and that he feels like he's

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Speaker 2: being timed. I said, there's no time limit. The change

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Speaker 2: has to keep going I see that he's putting in

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Speaker 2: the work, but I've seen that before, and I want

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Speaker 2: it to actually stick, or for him to not put

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Speaker 2: up such a fight about it if it does start

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Speaker 2: to slip into him working too much again. Comment or

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Speaker 2: two says, I've seen this kind of thing happen when

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Speaker 2: people get together very young. You guys, seemed to be

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Speaker 2: twenty one. You likely didn't get a lot of dating

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Speaker 2: and relationships in before the two of you were together.

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Speaker 2: He isn't happy, he said it by word, indeed repeatedly.

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Speaker 2: He doesn't want you to be happy in this because

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Speaker 2: he wants out. He wants to be with other people.

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Speaker 2: And again he's shown this through word and deeds. Do

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Speaker 2: you want to be stuck with someone who does not

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Speaker 2: want you? Do you want to be with someone who

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Speaker 2: resents you for wanting to only be with him? OHP

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Speaker 2: says he dated a lot of people before me. I

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Speaker 2: only dated him. I went on a few dates, but

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Speaker 2: didn't have any relationships. He said about two to three

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Speaker 2: weeks ago that maybe we should separate.

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Speaker 1: I went to my parents' house with the baby. Oh

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Speaker 1: my god.

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Speaker 2: He started apologizing and changed his actions. Now he's upset.

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Speaker 2: I'm happy with the change. It just feels like a

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Speaker 2: big back and forth, and I'm getting tired of it.

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Speaker 2: I'm scared to not be with him though. I love

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Speaker 2: so many of the people where we live, and I

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Speaker 2: know i'd be the one giving that up. Those friendships

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Speaker 2: and supports I had to build while he was away,

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Speaker 2: working and doing whatever. It's just so unfair. He didn't

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Speaker 2: have to stay with me if this wasn't what he wanted,

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Speaker 2: But he made every effort and attempt to say it

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Speaker 2: was to commit himself to me and us. But once

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Speaker 2: we have a baby, he wants out. He wanted me

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Speaker 2: to keep the baby. He doated on me all throughout pregnancy.

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Speaker 2: Comment three you says the pregnancy was a surprise birth

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Speaker 2: control failure, but we both wanted kids and were happy.

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Speaker 2: Are you sure you weren't the only one happy about

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Speaker 2: this who's birth control failed. I'm guessing it wasn't his,

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Speaker 2: because very little of what you have shared tells me

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Speaker 2: that he wants to be a parent. Therapy is not

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Speaker 2: the answer. You guys want completely different things. I had

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Speaker 2: a copper iud baby implanted next to it. I sent

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Speaker 2: him a picture of the test. Then he met me

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Speaker 2: at the obgyn for ultra confirmation and iud removal. He

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Speaker 2: cried when he saw the pictures and said he was

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Speaker 2: so happy and wanted to be a dad. I was

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Speaker 2: hesitant and said we could consider a termination due to

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Speaker 2: our life circumstances and the surprise of it all.

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Speaker 1: He said it was.

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Speaker 2: Up to me, and we decided to keep the baby.

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Speaker 2: Comment for four says how much longer until you finish school?

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Speaker 2: I would honestly focus on being done so you can

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Speaker 2: secure higher earning potential for yourself. Quietly talk to a

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Speaker 2: divorce lawyer so you can strategize regarding the best time

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Speaker 2: to file and seek spousal support and child support, and

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Speaker 2: then leave and let him do whatever the he f

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Speaker 2: he wants. He doesn't like being a husband or a father,

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Speaker 2: and he seems manipulative and selfish.

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Speaker 1: Op he says, two years and I'm done, and there's

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Speaker 1: an update. Oh boy.

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Speaker 2: I had gotten in contact with a divorce lawyer's office

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Speaker 2: and had a brief consultation with a secretary. It wasn't

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Speaker 2: too long, and I haven't done much more gathering of

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Speaker 2: info because I've had ten different final papers and projects

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Speaker 2: and presentations happening and just don't have the time or

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Speaker 2: energy to work on it right now. Since his last comments,

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Speaker 2: things had gone back getting better. We still spent time

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Speaker 2: together with our toddler and things were starting to feel

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Speaker 2: fun and like we were getting closer again.

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Speaker 1: Then we went for a walk today. I don't like her.

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Speaker 1: This is going though. Maybe he'll finally just be honest. Huh,

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Speaker 1: he'll wake up and smell the flowers on our walk.

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Speaker 2: He asked me how I thought things had been between us,

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Speaker 2: and I said I thought they'd been good, that I

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Speaker 2: liked spending time together. Then I asked if he was

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Speaker 2: still feeling the same way as the last time we

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Speaker 2: talked about this. He basically said yes, that he's disappointed

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Speaker 2: that he's the problem and if it wasn't for him,

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Speaker 2: we wouldn't be in couples therapy. He also said that

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Speaker 2: he doesn't ask me to change anything for him, which

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Speaker 2: is bs because he asked me to be polled for him.

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Speaker 2: I felt frustrated at this because I'm not asking him

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Speaker 2: to change. I'm asking him to do what he had

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Speaker 2: done our whole relationship before he changed. He used to

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Speaker 2: make me homemade picnic dates, surprise me with my favorite

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Speaker 2: snacks and coffee, and drinks or my favorite chocolates from

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Speaker 2: a European stuff, chocolate tear. We'd go on a date

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Speaker 2: every weekend and hang out every evening. We'd text constantly

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Speaker 2: and always found new things to talk about, even after

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Speaker 2: almost eight years.

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Speaker 1: Then, once the.

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Speaker 2: Baby was born, he began pushing me away, telling me

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Speaker 2: I shouldn't rely on him, while also pushing for a

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Speaker 2: polyamorous relationship. He told me he would burn the fumes

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Speaker 2: in his tank to make sure others were taken care of,

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Speaker 2: but then tell me he couldn't give me those same

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Speaker 2: fumes when I needed him, or even anything from his

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Speaker 2: tank when.

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Speaker 1: It was full.

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Speaker 2: It was so opposite of how we used to treat me.

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Speaker 2: And I told him this on our walk. Okay, like communication,

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Speaker 2: What on earth is this guy gonna say to that?

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Speaker 1: I don't know what. I'm so scared he.

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Speaker 2: Think he's just gonna go Wow, I can't believe you'd

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Speaker 2: say something like that to me.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to not talk to you for two

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Speaker 1: days probably. I can't believe. I can't believe you brought

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Speaker 1: up the truth. Yeah, how could you? You're You're really

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Speaker 1: like putting a lot of me right out. I feel

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Speaker 1: very attacked.

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Speaker 2: His response was to say, he accepts that he was

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Speaker 2: at fault, but I wouldn't be convinced of his position

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Speaker 2: no matter what he said. I told him that he's

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Speaker 2: not accepting he was or is at fault if he

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Speaker 2: keeps trying to convince me otherwise.

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Speaker 1: In yeah, he's like, I know it's my fault, but

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Speaker 1: you'll never accept that it's not my fault.

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Speaker 3: It's like, I'm not going to tell you because you

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Speaker 3: would never understand. I'm not going to tell you why

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Speaker 3: I would. You know why I'm still in the right. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: but it's just because you would never understand.

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Speaker 2: In our next couple's therapy session, I'm going to bring

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Speaker 2: up that I think we've been both sidesng the issues

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Speaker 2: in our relationship. I'm guilty of participating in this. I'll

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Speaker 2: defend him and try to protect his ego and work together,

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Speaker 2: but honestly, I haven't done anything wrong in this regard.

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Speaker 2: I've acted and reacted in an impossible situation that my

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Speaker 2: husband has put me in. I just don't know why

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Speaker 2: the birth of our child changed him so much, made

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Speaker 2: polyamory into such a fixation of his when that time

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Speaker 2: and energy for his self discovery could have been put

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Speaker 2: into directly caring for myself and our baby. He keeps

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Speaker 2: trying to make excuses that he didn't get to do

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Speaker 2: much the first year of her life. But he went

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Speaker 2: on multiple hour long hikes and dinners with his friend,

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Speaker 2: went on a solo camping trip, slept over at another

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Speaker 2: at another friend's house for their birthday instead of coming

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Speaker 2: to the first family outing I had planned since giving birth.

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Speaker 2: Went hiking and rafting a couple times with the significant

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Speaker 2: others of some of my friends, went on dates with me,

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Speaker 2: went on dates with other people, had dinner with friends,

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Speaker 2: went on solo bike rides where he'd been gone for

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Speaker 2: multiple hours or even all day. And hey, by the way,

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Speaker 2: you can do all of that stuff while listening to

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Speaker 2: full episodes with stories just like this. All you gotta

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Speaker 2: do is go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, iHeartRadio, wherever you

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Speaker 2: listen to podcasts, search Okay story Time and you'll find sixty.

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Speaker 1: Days back to back to back.

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Speaker 2: It's twenty four times sixty hours worth of stories to

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Speaker 2: listen to.

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Speaker 3: Wow.

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Speaker 2: When I point out my husband has been able to

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Speaker 2: do things since the birth of our daughter, his comeback

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Speaker 2: is that it's not as much as he usually did

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Speaker 2: before the baby. He only got to ride his motorcycle

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Speaker 2: once or twice last year. I could have done all

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Speaker 2: those things too, never mind that I was exclusively breastfeeding

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Speaker 2: our baby and going out anywhere meant having a portable

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Speaker 2: pump and refrigeration options on hand, never mind a space

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Speaker 2: where I could actually comfortably sit in pump for twenty

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Speaker 2: to thirty minutes in the middle of activities.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, man, Just what the f happened? How

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Speaker 1: do I go?

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Speaker 2: How did I go from a devoted and loving feminist

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Speaker 2: minded husband to whatever he is now?

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Speaker 1: Whatever?

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Speaker 2: I'm still going to try and fix things because maybe

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Speaker 2: at some point he'll see the light. But at the

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Speaker 2: same time, I'm going to begin to craft my exit plan.

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Speaker 1: That's all you can do.

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Speaker 2: Let's get into these relevant comments. Comment one. Wait, so

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Speaker 2: his tank is on fumes but he wants additional partners

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Speaker 2: right bs, He can't take care of the relationship he has,

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Speaker 2: but he wants more of them. This man was never

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Speaker 2: a progressive feminist and is acting like an entitled baby.

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Speaker 2: He has a child and a wife, and he's acting

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Speaker 2: like he didn't ask for either, and he's a victim

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Speaker 2: I don't think there is a both sides here, and

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Speaker 2: I would seriously reconsider any couple's therapist who lets him

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Speaker 2: get away with thinking both of you are contributing to

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Speaker 2: him being entitled, disengaged, and selfish. Ope, he says, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I've been frustrated by that in therapy, though.

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Speaker 1: I think our therapist is trying to.

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Speaker 2: Follow our lead a little bit because he knows he

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Speaker 2: can't fix it for us and is trying to help

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Speaker 2: us figure out how to fix it ourselves. I've also

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Speaker 2: been contributing to it and presenting things that way because

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Speaker 2: I'm not trying to avoid responsibility for things. But yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's not my fault. Things are the way they are.

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Speaker 2: Comment Or two says, what did he expect when y'all

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Speaker 2: became parents?

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Speaker 1: He's a dad.

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Speaker 2: Now, crap gets real when you have to put all

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Speaker 2: your energy, money, blood, sweat and tears into raising your kids, Right,

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Speaker 2: it's not going to be a bed of roses the

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Speaker 2: whole way. And you know what, a bet of roses

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Speaker 2: would be uncomfortable because they've got thorns.

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Speaker 1: Right. I've always been confused by that. I've never thought

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Speaker 1: about it that way.

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Speaker 2: A bet of roses looks nice. Yeah, if you lay

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Speaker 2: on them, it's gonna hurt.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna hurt unless there's enough roses.

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Speaker 3: Whereas the flower part is the only part that touches you.

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Speaker 1: Ye, a bed of rose petals, bet of rose petals

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Speaker 1: would have to be the distinction. Anyway, I'm sorry he's

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Speaker 1: placing the fault on you.

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Speaker 2: You don't deserve to be treated like the problem when

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Speaker 2: it's him that's making insane demands on you and you're

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Speaker 2: doing the right thing. Girl, Opie says, thank you. It's

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Speaker 2: not like he didn't expect it, or at least he

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Speaker 2: was aware. We talked throughout the pregnancy about how everything

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Speaker 2: will change, how it already had changed for me, and

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Speaker 2: how my life and my plans were pushed back a

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Speaker 2: year because of pregnancy and postpartum. He got to keep

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Speaker 2: much more of his life and freedom than I did.

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Speaker 1: Yes, he took on extra side work.

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Speaker 2: To bring in some of the money we were losing

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Speaker 2: with me staying home, though we would have lost even

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Speaker 2: more if I had kept working. But all the time

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Speaker 2: he was working, I was taking care of our baby,

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Speaker 2: And all the time he wasn't working, I was taking

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Speaker 2: care of our baby. Comment three says he was never

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Speaker 2: a true feminist. Oh sure, he was a feminist when

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Speaker 2: he was getting the spicy sleep regularly and he was

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Speaker 2: the main character in your life. But after the baby,

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Speaker 2: patriarchy says, he's not supposed to be the caregiver. Patriarchy says,

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Speaker 2: it's normal for you to be around a burned out mess,

359
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Speaker 2: not his problem. I don't is that look okay, patriarchy aside.

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Speaker 2: I think you don't need to be the patriarchy to

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Speaker 2: tell you to be a.

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Speaker 1: Good husband or a bad husband.

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Speaker 2: This guy just yeah, I don't think this guy's I

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Speaker 2: don't think this guy's sitting down at the bi weekly

365
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Speaker 2: patriarchy meeting and being like, yeah, so we're gonna keep

366
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Speaker 2: being bad husbands this week. Cool, cool, good, good good.

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Speaker 2: I think he just doesn't want to be a husband

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Speaker 2: at all, and he's trying to make her leave.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and he's.

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Speaker 2: Probably again, probably cheating on her. I would put all

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Speaker 2: of my eggs into that basket. Don't think we're going

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Speaker 2: to get that revelation here.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but I'm heavily suspect.

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00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:08,159
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, what, Like, what kind of trips are he

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Speaker 1: is he going on?

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Speaker 3: Well?

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Speaker 1: What's he doing all day at work? In those logs

378
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Speaker 1: on me. By the way, what's what's what trips are?

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Speaker 1: Is he going on? Where's he doing at work? Oh?

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00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:22,840
Speaker 1: He's putting in work. Oh okay.

381
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Speaker 2: Patriarchy says it's normal for him to want spicy sleep

382
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Speaker 2: with other people, no matter how is why he feels

383
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:30,920
Speaker 2: about it, so he believed it it benefits him. That's

384
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Speaker 2: the whole story. Look, patriarchy has never convinced me I

385
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Speaker 2: need polyamory.

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Speaker 1: I'll say that. Okay, yep.

387
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Speaker 2: Maybe he gets his head out of his button decides

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Speaker 2: to actually build a loving and successful life with you,

389
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Speaker 2: someone who.

390
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Speaker 1: Really wants that.

391
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Speaker 2: But that's going to be an uphill climb because he's

392
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Speaker 2: already figured out that just following the scripts he's heard

393
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Speaker 2: all his life ensures his life really didn't have to

394
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Speaker 2: change half as much as yours did. I would really

395
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Speaker 2: hone in on that with the therapist, and if the

396
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Speaker 2: therapist tries to both sides fire that therapist. You don't

397
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Speaker 2: need a therapist to act like you're the problem here

398
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:04,000
Speaker 2: when you one hundred percent or not. I feel for you,

399
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:06,360
Speaker 2: and I think it's wise you're keeping an exit plan.

400
00:18:06,840 --> 00:18:09,000
Speaker 2: Ohp says, I just don't really know how to make

401
00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,680
Speaker 2: that exit plan. I'm not working as I take care

402
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,840
Speaker 2: of the toddler full time and am in school on

403
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:16,520
Speaker 2: a full time schedule too, squished into two days a

404
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,560
Speaker 2: week while my parents take care of the little one,

405
00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:20,880
Speaker 2: so I'm not making my own money at the moment.

406
00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:24,240
Speaker 2: I don't graduate until twenty twenty seven with a master's

407
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Speaker 2: woo nice. So I either have to stay with him

408
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Speaker 2: until I get a job after graduation so I can

409
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Speaker 2: afford my own place, or I have to move in

410
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Speaker 2: with my parents before that, who don't really have the

411
00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:36,440
Speaker 2: space for us, but can make it work. Commenter Force says, seriously, no,

412
00:18:36,720 --> 00:18:39,040
Speaker 2: just break up. This is a complete waste of time

413
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Speaker 2: and energy. I was rooting for you in the last post,

414
00:18:41,560 --> 00:18:43,199
Speaker 2: and I felt that reading this is a waste of

415
00:18:43,240 --> 00:18:47,639
Speaker 2: my time and energy. Just break up, OHP says thank you.

416
00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:49,760
Speaker 2: I feel like my wheels are just spinning on this too.

417
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Speaker 2: It feels like every time things get better lately, he

418
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Speaker 2: tells me he's not fulfilled. I don't know why he

419
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Speaker 2: won't just break up with me. Then what does he

420
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Speaker 2: want to fix if being together makes him feel so bad?

421
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Speaker 3: My wife refused to compromise on our marriage because it's

422
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Speaker 3: against who she is.

423
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Speaker 1: That's just the way I am.

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Speaker 3: When I was younger, before I met my wife, I

425
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Speaker 3: had a pretty fun and adventurous life. I drank, I partied,

426
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Speaker 3: I worked out, I tried some different substances. I worked

427
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Speaker 3: out hard, and I had amazing passionate, spicy, sleep.

428
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Speaker 1: Cool.

429
00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:26,040
Speaker 3: I never went to college, but I worked hard and

430
00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:29,800
Speaker 3: became a general manager than a district manager. I was

431
00:19:29,840 --> 00:19:32,040
Speaker 3: then asked to move from the West Coast to the

432
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Speaker 3: Midwest to open and grow a small business.

433
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Speaker 1: I accepted.

434
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Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from mister one two and

435
00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:39,800
Speaker 3: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

436
00:19:39,840 --> 00:19:42,920
Speaker 3: the r slash Okay storytime sepread it. So I met

437
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Speaker 3: my wife, I calmed down on the partying, going out

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Speaker 3: and drinking. The substances I tried were usually a once

439
00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 3: or twice off while on a bachelor party here and there.

440
00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:52,960
Speaker 1: So no issue there.

441
00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:55,280
Speaker 3: On our first date, my wife didn't dress up, put

442
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:57,560
Speaker 3: on any makeup, or even shower after work.

443
00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 1: She came in a tank top and some black short charts.

444
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:01,800
Speaker 1: I thought to myself, this.

445
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:05,080
Speaker 3: Is actually incredibly cute. She gives such few f's about

446
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:08,600
Speaker 3: this date. She is so low maintenance. She's still beautiful

447
00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:12,560
Speaker 3: and fit even without all that. She also told me

448
00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:14,480
Speaker 3: on our first date that she doesn't like dressing up

449
00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:16,560
Speaker 3: or putting on makeup. We went out again and again

450
00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:20,359
Speaker 3: with slightly varying degrees of effort and dressing up on

451
00:20:20,440 --> 00:20:23,680
Speaker 3: our fourth date. Our fourth date was a big one.

452
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:27,000
Speaker 3: We went to her favorite musical and she dressed to

453
00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:32,760
Speaker 3: the nines, tight black dress, wedges, black panties, makeup and everything.

454
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:36,200
Speaker 1: She looked stunning and I thought, what a catch.

455
00:20:36,359 --> 00:20:40,199
Speaker 3: She's beautiful without any effort and gorgeous with it. We

456
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:44,439
Speaker 3: had spicy sleep for the first time afterwards, and okay,

457
00:20:44,920 --> 00:20:48,439
Speaker 3: and it was a long and passionate again.

458
00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:52,639
Speaker 1: You're cool, We get it. We just move on. Come on.

459
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:57,160
Speaker 3: My wife had the complete opposite lifestyle that I had

460
00:20:57,200 --> 00:21:00,480
Speaker 3: growing up. She is a homebody, didn't party. She's never

461
00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:04,240
Speaker 3: been wasted, never tried substances. It doesn't really like going out,

462
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,600
Speaker 3: hates cooking, but likes tidying it and cleaning. I thought

463
00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:10,080
Speaker 3: we would do an amazing job of balancing each other out.

464
00:21:10,359 --> 00:21:12,159
Speaker 3: I could make her come out of her show a

465
00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:15,000
Speaker 3: little bit, and she could rain me in. We used

466
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:18,280
Speaker 3: to work out together regularly. She was an athlete growing up.

467
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:20,760
Speaker 3: And so was I. I still fancy myself an athlete

468
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:24,720
Speaker 3: to a degree. As my business grew, I had less

469
00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 3: time for working out For a few years, she stopped

470
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:29,400
Speaker 3: going to the gym as she got busier at work

471
00:21:29,400 --> 00:21:32,160
Speaker 3: and we didn't have a workout routine together. We went

472
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:35,119
Speaker 3: through some ups and downs lowells in our spicy sleep

473
00:21:35,359 --> 00:21:38,200
Speaker 3: life due to her going to bed at nine every

474
00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:40,560
Speaker 3: night and me usually working until ten pm or later.

475
00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:44,159
Speaker 3: We got married and then moved to the suburbs. I

476
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:46,439
Speaker 3: sell my business and get a corporate job.

477
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:48,840
Speaker 1: I do well at my job. She does well at

478
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:50,280
Speaker 1: her job and gets promoted.

479
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:53,200
Speaker 3: I have time to go to the gym again, lose

480
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:54,920
Speaker 3: thirty pounds and put muscle back on.

481
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:57,520
Speaker 1: She works from seven am to five pm every day.

482
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:01,040
Speaker 3: I don't have any more crazy nights, irely drink, cook

483
00:22:01,080 --> 00:22:03,040
Speaker 3: dinner at home, and have a boring life that is

484
00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:05,520
Speaker 3: eating at me from the inside. The way that this

485
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:08,679
Speaker 3: oat pe is like setting things up, not even with

486
00:22:08,760 --> 00:22:11,080
Speaker 3: the story, but just how he's writing the story. It

487
00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:13,800
Speaker 3: feels like his English teacher would be like, you got

488
00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:16,919
Speaker 3: a show, Not tell my guy, this is all telling.

489
00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:21,040
Speaker 2: You go giving the uh you know, the the the

490
00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:24,359
Speaker 2: exposition here there is no spice or passion in our

491
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:25,000
Speaker 2: life together.

492
00:22:25,240 --> 00:22:28,320
Speaker 3: We are vanilla. We have no similar hobbies or shows

493
00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:31,560
Speaker 3: that we watch together. Mostly we talk about work. I

494
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:34,399
Speaker 3: approach her and I say, this is what I need

495
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,480
Speaker 3: so I can be happier in our marriage. I'd like

496
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:38,080
Speaker 3: you to start coming back to the jam with me

497
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:40,680
Speaker 3: or doing some sort of exercise with me, for whatever

498
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,879
Speaker 3: screwed up reason. I need this for my partner to

499
00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:46,240
Speaker 3: feel a connection with you. Interesting team I here, But

500
00:22:46,320 --> 00:22:48,919
Speaker 3: the only time we ever have something close to not

501
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,159
Speaker 3: vanilla spicy sleep is when we do some sort of

502
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:53,639
Speaker 3: physical activity together, like go on a hike or a

503
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:57,040
Speaker 3: rare yoga class together. I need a little bit more

504
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,760
Speaker 3: excitement or craziness from you. Not asking you to do

505
00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:04,200
Speaker 3: a line of substances off of a spicy dancer's front airbag,

506
00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:07,959
Speaker 3: but just be more open having a few drinks at

507
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,960
Speaker 3: a nice restaurant on a Tuesday night. If we lighten

508
00:23:11,040 --> 00:23:13,080
Speaker 3: up a bit, some of our passion for life might

509
00:23:13,119 --> 00:23:16,399
Speaker 3: come back on our date nights. Don't pull up in

510
00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 3: front of the house text me to come outside and

511
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:21,800
Speaker 3: drive to us and drive us to the nearest restaurant

512
00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:24,240
Speaker 3: because you're striving. Would you mind coming in and putting

513
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:26,439
Speaker 3: on a little makeup or something other than what you

514
00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:29,080
Speaker 3: wore to work, Not every time, just every once in

515
00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:31,200
Speaker 3: a while, so it feels like you're putting some effort

516
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:31,560
Speaker 3: into it.

517
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:36,200
Speaker 1: And there were some other minor requests. Her response, all of.

518
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:39,359
Speaker 3: Those things are against my core being, so I can't

519
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:42,040
Speaker 3: do those things for you. You shouldn't expect me to change

520
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:44,760
Speaker 3: who I am. I feel like the things I'm asking

521
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:47,040
Speaker 3: aren't excessive or unreasonable.

522
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:50,760
Speaker 1: Right, but you asked in the way I feel like.

523
00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:53,000
Speaker 3: These are basic things a married couple does to keep

524
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:55,480
Speaker 3: a spark going for the sixty years you plan to

525
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:55,960
Speaker 3: be together.

526
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,840
Speaker 1: Am I being unreasonable? There are some edits and additions.

527
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:01,439
Speaker 3: First off, things with the responsors so far, some of

528
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,679
Speaker 3: them have been eye opening to one a hole. I

529
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:06,600
Speaker 3: am for the way I presented this to her. Thank you, However,

530
00:24:06,800 --> 00:24:09,800
Speaker 3: that doesn't change the way I feel. Second, something that

531
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:12,399
Speaker 3: I should add is that despite dressing up and wearing

532
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:15,480
Speaker 3: makeup being against her core being, she has no problem

533
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,360
Speaker 3: doing it for the occasional wedding or big event.

534
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:17,920
Speaker 1: Exactly.

535
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:20,680
Speaker 3: You want an event, you want, you want a special

536
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:22,879
Speaker 3: thing to be excited for, and dressing up is a

537
00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:24,240
Speaker 3: part of the process.

538
00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:25,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what you want.

539
00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,360
Speaker 2: Anyone you're married to shouldn't need to have to put

540
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:31,160
Speaker 2: on anything to go anywhere with you, only if they

541
00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:31,640
Speaker 2: want to.

542
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:34,360
Speaker 3: She says, she likes to look good for the pictures,

543
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:37,080
Speaker 3: so can it really be against her core being.

544
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:39,879
Speaker 1: Third, everyone is focusing on the.

545
00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:42,520
Speaker 3: Makeup and excitement comment, and I can see how that

546
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:46,080
Speaker 3: makes me sound like an absolute jack. But the thought

547
00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:50,040
Speaker 3: I was trying to convey, which I did end up

548
00:24:50,040 --> 00:24:52,080
Speaker 3: explaining to her as well, was that we needed to

549
00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:55,200
Speaker 3: do things together to find a connection again. I unfortunately

550
00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 3: feel no closeness or emotional connection to my wife right now.

551
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:01,199
Speaker 3: I've suggested multiple different activities and adventures we can go

552
00:25:01,280 --> 00:25:04,359
Speaker 3: on together so that we can share a common experience.

553
00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 3: She's usually too tired from work. And I don't need

554
00:25:08,280 --> 00:25:10,760
Speaker 3: to do more things alone. I do plenty things alone

555
00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:13,400
Speaker 3: between friends, classes, and sports leagues.

556
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:15,920
Speaker 1: I want to do things with my wife.

557
00:25:16,119 --> 00:25:18,439
Speaker 3: Fourth, At no point did I ever ask her to

558
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:20,680
Speaker 3: come party with me. I don't need a party anymore.

559
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,040
Speaker 3: Where did I say that I asked her to party?

560
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:24,639
Speaker 3: All I said that I wish she could be more

561
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:26,679
Speaker 3: open and trying new things with me. Whether it's a

562
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 3: new restaurant or a new class, activity or adventure. More addition,

563
00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:34,240
Speaker 3: where does it say anything about asking her to lose weight?

564
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:36,520
Speaker 3: People go to the gym for a variety of reasons

565
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:40,040
Speaker 3: besides losing weight. We do have an update. I'll try

566
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:42,200
Speaker 3: to keep this as short as I can, so over

567
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:44,480
Speaker 3: the weekend we talked much more calmly.

568
00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:46,159
Speaker 1: About some of the stuff that I approached her about.

569
00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:48,359
Speaker 3: I started off by apologizing for the way that I

570
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 3: phrased my once, but also said that just because I

571
00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:52,680
Speaker 3: was an a whole in the way that I handle

572
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:56,840
Speaker 3: it doesn't change that those wants still exist. She acknowledged

573
00:25:56,880 --> 00:25:59,280
Speaker 3: that it is definitely fair to want the relationship to

574
00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,560
Speaker 3: be passionate exciting. After being together for five years, we

575
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:06,160
Speaker 3: came to some of the following agreements exercise and physical

576
00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:09,960
Speaker 3: challenging activities together. She confessed that she can't get back

577
00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:12,080
Speaker 3: into going to the gym because she associates the gym

578
00:26:12,119 --> 00:26:14,040
Speaker 3: and working out with ten years of her life where

579
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:16,560
Speaker 3: she was forced to work out constantly told us she

580
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:18,720
Speaker 3: wasn't good enough and needed to be better, and being

581
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 3: yelled at by coaches in high school and college.

582
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:23,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, bigger deal.

583
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:26,360
Speaker 3: Turns out this aversion is something a lot of athletes

584
00:26:26,440 --> 00:26:27,919
Speaker 3: deal with, which is news to me.

585
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:30,440
Speaker 1: I didn't know that either. Oh yeah, dude, you think

586
00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:30,760
Speaker 1: that's why.

587
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:35,800
Speaker 2: Like there's a huge you knowing, like a great football

588
00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:38,560
Speaker 2: player who retired like huh at like not the height

589
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:40,160
Speaker 2: of his career. But it's like he's definitely still could

590
00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:42,199
Speaker 2: have kept going. He's just like, I just don't have

591
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:43,719
Speaker 2: it in me. I just don't want to do anyway.

592
00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,080
Speaker 2: I already won the super Bowl. Dang, dude, I want

593
00:26:46,119 --> 00:26:48,000
Speaker 2: to keep doing this. This stuff's hard.

594
00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:48,800
Speaker 1: It is hard.

595
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:51,480
Speaker 2: And I got a family. Yeah, I got a Super

596
00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:53,159
Speaker 2: Bowl ring, I got money.

597
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:54,720
Speaker 1: You're good. I'm over it.

598
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:57,239
Speaker 3: Yeah, and yeah, well that makes sense which to make

599
00:26:57,280 --> 00:26:58,119
Speaker 3: that call, you know.

600
00:26:58,440 --> 00:26:58,840
Speaker 1: Yeah.

601
00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:01,600
Speaker 3: I started looking into physical activities that we can do together,

602
00:27:01,640 --> 00:27:03,919
Speaker 3: and we're planning to try some different things. We have

603
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:06,560
Speaker 3: an indoor rock climbing date planned for this week of fun,

604
00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:09,360
Speaker 3: which we are both excited about. See, that's fun. There's

605
00:27:09,359 --> 00:27:13,240
Speaker 3: a lot of fun activities to do that that doesn't have.

606
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:15,640
Speaker 1: To be like go go go, push push push.

607
00:27:15,400 --> 00:27:15,560
Speaker 3: You know.

608
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:18,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, So that's nice. Yeah.

609
00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:22,160
Speaker 3: As for effort into the date night, I backtracked big

610
00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:25,600
Speaker 3: time on the makeup and be more fun and exciting thing, and.

611
00:27:25,480 --> 00:27:28,119
Speaker 1: Said that I was a total knucklehead for saying that,

612
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:31,359
Speaker 1: and it was not what I meant. I used a

613
00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:32,520
Speaker 1: horrible example there.

614
00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:34,879
Speaker 3: I explained in a little more detail that I basically

615
00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:36,960
Speaker 3: wanted to feel more like she wanted me to be

616
00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,600
Speaker 3: attracted to her. She agreed that it was unfair for

617
00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:42,159
Speaker 3: her to pull up after work on a date. She

618
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:44,080
Speaker 3: agreed that it was unfair for her to pull up

619
00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:46,080
Speaker 3: after work on date nights and just have me run

620
00:27:46,119 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 3: out to the car so we can get to the

621
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:50,320
Speaker 3: restaurant and chow down. We will both be putting more

622
00:27:50,359 --> 00:27:51,400
Speaker 3: effort into date nights.

623
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:53,880
Speaker 1: See that's so nice. I love these solutionicks.

624
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:58,440
Speaker 2: What happens when you open communication channels with each other?

625
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 3: Yes, and it's okay if it starts in a bad

626
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:04,679
Speaker 3: way because you didn't meet it, you make mistakes, and

627
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:06,119
Speaker 3: then you communicate about that.

628
00:28:06,400 --> 00:28:08,520
Speaker 1: Yes, I will do.

629
00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:10,920
Speaker 3: A better job of picking new and fun places to try.

630
00:28:11,119 --> 00:28:12,840
Speaker 3: She will be more open to trying new things and

631
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:15,600
Speaker 3: spend some time after work getting ready, which brings us

632
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:16,560
Speaker 3: to the last point.

633
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 1: Her work hours.

634
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:20,040
Speaker 3: She didn't realize the toll it was taking on a

635
00:28:20,040 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 3: relationship that she was exhausting herself at work. She said

636
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:25,119
Speaker 3: that she will make a bigger effort to leave by

637
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:27,840
Speaker 3: four point thirty going forward, and to go in less

638
00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:30,320
Speaker 3: on the weekends, which will leave more time for us

639
00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 3: to do things together, even if it's as simple as

640
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 3: relaxing by the pool. I didn't mention the spicy sleep stuff.

641
00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 3: I'm hoping that if these changes stick, that that will

642
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 3: naturally result in a more passionate, spicy sleep life, which

643
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:43,720
Speaker 3: will probably be true.

644
00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 1: Honestly.

645
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,680
Speaker 3: I ended by asking if there was anything else that

646
00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:50,920
Speaker 3: she wanted for me, and that she didn't have to

647
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:53,200
Speaker 3: respond right now. She said that she will take some

648
00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:55,720
Speaker 3: time to think about that, as she hasn't even thought

649
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:59,040
Speaker 3: about anything like that lately. Thanks to everyone for the advice,

650
00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:01,920
Speaker 3: and I'm excited to see where our relationship goes from here.

651
00:29:02,080 --> 00:29:04,000
Speaker 1: And I'm excited to see all of you.

652
00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:06,480
Speaker 3: Go over to Spotify, iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, or.

653
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:09,560
Speaker 1: Whatever your favorite podcast app is. We've got full episodes,

654
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:11,560
Speaker 1: more stories just like this one just searts.

655
00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:17,360
Speaker 3: Okay, story tells right, Yeah, thousand episode many there's more

656
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:18,120
Speaker 3: to this story.

657
00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:21,240
Speaker 1: But I'm loving how this is going. Yes, it's perfect.

658
00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:22,960
Speaker 1: Makes me feel so warm inside.

659
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:26,120
Speaker 2: Yes, it's it's like when when things when you feel

660
00:29:26,160 --> 00:29:29,040
Speaker 2: like things are slipping in any given context, like a

661
00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:31,600
Speaker 2: relationship or something, it's like, just talk. You have to

662
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:35,000
Speaker 2: talk about it, don't just sit there and say nothing exactly.

663
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:36,680
Speaker 3: It's just such I feel like this is such a

664
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:39,640
Speaker 3: breath of fresh air because so many of these stories,

665
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:44,160
Speaker 3: like when problems starts to come up like this, you know,

666
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:47,080
Speaker 3: or similar to this, it's it's usually like no, like

667
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:49,400
Speaker 3: it's just being this whole fight and then it ends

668
00:29:49,440 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 3: up that they shouldn't be together and whoever brought up

669
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:54,600
Speaker 3: the problems was they whole because he didn't bring them up.

670
00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:58,160
Speaker 1: In the right way. But this is so relieving that

671
00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 1: it's like, hang on, guys, it's okay. They both love

672
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:04,600
Speaker 1: each other and they're gonna work it out. It's so

673
00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:06,720
Speaker 1: nice And we do have a little bit more to

674
00:30:06,760 --> 00:30:09,640
Speaker 1: this story seed more happy update.

675
00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:12,440
Speaker 3: She's currently planning a date for us for the weekend,

676
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:16,280
Speaker 3: which is a trip to Tequila Fest in our local downtown.

677
00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:19,400
Speaker 3: This is something so literally beyond anything that she's ever

678
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:22,560
Speaker 3: shown an interest in that I am totally floored. Sorry,

679
00:30:22,640 --> 00:30:25,400
Speaker 3: I'm not trying to brag, just really excited, and I

680
00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:27,959
Speaker 3: understand that she's probably not interested in tequila, but that

681
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 3: she's going to do it to make an effort to

682
00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 3: do stuff together.

683
00:30:31,120 --> 00:30:32,760
Speaker 1: And that is the end of that beautiful story.

684
00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 2: Hey is John og host Were gonna get back to

685
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:37,360
Speaker 2: the stories, but a quick free minute break of ads

686
00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:38,080
Speaker 2: from our sponsors.

687
00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:41,640
Speaker 3: My sister fired me from my job, even though I

688
00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:46,160
Speaker 3: did nothing wrong fire her. I, nineteen female, have had

689
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:48,800
Speaker 3: a broken family for at least twelve years now, although

690
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:51,120
Speaker 3: I have four siblings. For the sake of this story,

691
00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:54,000
Speaker 3: I will only refer to my twenty three female sister

692
00:30:54,120 --> 00:30:56,560
Speaker 3: and my seventeen male younger brother. By the way, this

693
00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:58,760
Speaker 3: comes from it pulling on strings and if you want

694
00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:00,840
Speaker 3: to submit your own stories, going to our slash Okay

695
00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:04,360
Speaker 3: storytime separate. So for context, my older siblings have a

696
00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:07,080
Speaker 3: different dad to my younger brother and me, and since

697
00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:10,080
Speaker 3: I was seven, my sister had moved to her dad's place.

698
00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:12,560
Speaker 3: Since then, I have seen my sister on and off

699
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,960
Speaker 3: as she moved between her dad's and my mom's house

700
00:31:15,360 --> 00:31:18,200
Speaker 3: and then eventually out of home. Her dad lived about

701
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:20,960
Speaker 3: twelve hours away at the time. For example, for my

702
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:23,480
Speaker 3: tenth birthday, she surprised me by turning up, and I

703
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:26,600
Speaker 3: cried because she hadn't even messaged me since she left

704
00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:29,840
Speaker 3: three years prior. Around about this time last year, I

705
00:31:29,920 --> 00:31:32,240
Speaker 3: needed a second job for extra money, and so my

706
00:31:32,320 --> 00:31:34,720
Speaker 3: sister offered me a casual position as she was the

707
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:37,800
Speaker 3: store manager at her place of work. Our relationship had

708
00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:39,920
Speaker 3: been strained for years at this point, as she would

709
00:31:39,960 --> 00:31:42,360
Speaker 3: let me trust her and then push me away again,

710
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:45,160
Speaker 3: but at this time we had just started talking again

711
00:31:45,400 --> 00:31:47,400
Speaker 3: and I saw it as an opportunity to get to

712
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:49,840
Speaker 3: know her once again since we were both adults now.

713
00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 3: Her condition to letting me work there was that I

714
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:54,520
Speaker 3: wasn't allowed to tell the others that I was her sister,

715
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:57,000
Speaker 3: which hurt me a lot because I felt like she

716
00:31:57,080 --> 00:31:59,600
Speaker 3: was embarrassed of me, especially when my younger brother worked

717
00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:01,640
Speaker 3: there at the time and everyone knew that he was

718
00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 3: her brother. She's like, yeah, but he's cool regardless. I

719
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:07,440
Speaker 3: let it go because I was just glad to be

720
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:10,160
Speaker 3: around her again. Fast forward to a couple of weeks

721
00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:12,080
Speaker 3: and I had a friend who was having issues with

722
00:32:12,120 --> 00:32:14,000
Speaker 3: her family, so I had offered her to stay with

723
00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:16,400
Speaker 3: my younger brother, my dad, and me until she found

724
00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 3: somewhere to live.

725
00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:18,600
Speaker 1: On this specific day.

726
00:32:18,640 --> 00:32:20,560
Speaker 3: It was her first day coming to stay with us,

727
00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:22,840
Speaker 3: and I knew she finished work at five point fifteen.

728
00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:24,840
Speaker 1: It was about a half hour drive.

729
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:26,840
Speaker 3: From her work to my house in about a fifteen

730
00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:28,800
Speaker 3: minute drive from my work to my house, and I

731
00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:29,800
Speaker 3: was off at five thirty.

732
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:31,240
Speaker 1: For this reason, I wanted to.

733
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:33,200
Speaker 3: Leave right on time because I didn't want her to

734
00:32:33,200 --> 00:32:35,960
Speaker 3: be waiting outside at night by herself. It was winter,

735
00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:38,120
Speaker 3: so it got dark very quickly, and she didn't know

736
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:40,080
Speaker 3: my brother or dad well enough to be in the

737
00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:41,400
Speaker 3: house alone with them.

738
00:32:41,600 --> 00:32:43,840
Speaker 1: And I didn't want her to be uncomfortable. For this reason.

739
00:32:44,040 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 3: Straight on five thirty, I tried to ask my sister

740
00:32:46,160 --> 00:32:47,320
Speaker 3: if I could go home, but she.

741
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:48,960
Speaker 1: Was busy talking, so I waited.

742
00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:51,600
Speaker 3: After about five minutes, I started getting anxious because I

743
00:32:51,640 --> 00:32:54,000
Speaker 3: am a nervous person, and I said to her, Hey,

744
00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:56,080
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, but I really need to leave. I'm off

745
00:32:56,080 --> 00:32:58,080
Speaker 3: at five thirty and it's now five thirty five. I

746
00:32:58,080 --> 00:33:00,120
Speaker 3: need to go home, so my friend isn't there by herself.

747
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,160
Speaker 3: She responded with I have made a new rule that

748
00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:05,760
Speaker 3: whatever time you finish, you need to stay fifteen minutes.

749
00:33:05,560 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 1: After to tidy up your station before you leave. I

750
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:09,360
Speaker 1: will pay you for it. You can't just.

751
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:10,480
Speaker 4: Make new rules.

752
00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:14,320
Speaker 3: Willy nilly, Yeah, you gotta put that in the schedule then, yeah,

753
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:18,000
Speaker 3: be like, oh you're off now, I'm adding fifteen minutes

754
00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:20,200
Speaker 3: to your off time. I said to her, I've already

755
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:22,400
Speaker 3: cleaned up my station. On my roster, it says five

756
00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,360
Speaker 3: thirty finished time. If you want me to finish at

757
00:33:24,400 --> 00:33:25,440
Speaker 3: five forty five, you need to.

758
00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:27,000
Speaker 1: Put that on my roster. That's right.

759
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 3: I understand you are going to have to pay me

760
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:31,120
Speaker 3: for it, and in the future I will stay back,

761
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:32,440
Speaker 3: but today I really need to go.

762
00:33:32,680 --> 00:33:35,880
Speaker 1: She then told me no, and I was visibly annoyed.

763
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:38,520
Speaker 3: Like I said, I am a nervous person and being

764
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 3: late makes me anxious. I stayed for another five minutes

765
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:45,640
Speaker 3: before she said come with me now, before walking me

766
00:33:45,760 --> 00:33:48,240
Speaker 3: into the back of the store, and said, do not

767
00:33:48,840 --> 00:33:51,240
Speaker 3: ever undermine me in front of staff ever.

768
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:53,760
Speaker 1: Again. The way you just spoke to me was disgusting.

769
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 3: And just because I'm your sister doesn't mean you get

770
00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:56,960
Speaker 3: to talk to.

771
00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:59,280
Speaker 1: Me like that. I am your boss, girl.

772
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:03,160
Speaker 3: If you're my friend, God, literally, even if that's your boss,

773
00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:06,360
Speaker 3: like you still say to your boss, sorry, can't stay

774
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:08,799
Speaker 3: you'll have to put it on my thing next time,

775
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:10,920
Speaker 3: to which I was confused because I didn't give her

776
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:11,680
Speaker 3: any attitude.

777
00:34:11,719 --> 00:34:13,279
Speaker 1: I only explained that to.

778
00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:15,640
Speaker 3: Her because at my other job, I was a duty

779
00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:18,359
Speaker 3: manager and I knew that it was illegal to keep

780
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:20,719
Speaker 3: staff back past their finished time if they refuse to

781
00:34:20,719 --> 00:34:23,239
Speaker 3: stay back, which is what I responded to her with.

782
00:34:23,480 --> 00:34:26,040
Speaker 1: At this point, staff were walking past and witnessing.

783
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:30,399
Speaker 5: Now she's created this whole like mess that's getting even

784
00:34:30,480 --> 00:34:32,640
Speaker 5: more dramatic that people are gonna notice.

785
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:34,200
Speaker 1: Make it a scene, I'm sure.

786
00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:36,960
Speaker 3: Like when they first had that conversation, no one cared

787
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:39,000
Speaker 3: at that place of work. She has lots of staff

788
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:41,360
Speaker 3: that are afraid of losing their jobs, so they agree

789
00:34:41,360 --> 00:34:43,799
Speaker 3: with her. So I knew that I wasn't going to win.

790
00:34:44,120 --> 00:34:47,000
Speaker 3: I told her, I'm sorry, but I'm leaving. My friend

791
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:49,080
Speaker 3: needs me. I already told you that I will stay

792
00:34:49,080 --> 00:34:50,920
Speaker 3: in the future, but that doesn't give you the right

793
00:34:50,960 --> 00:34:53,480
Speaker 3: to talk to me like that either, just because I'm

794
00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:56,160
Speaker 3: working under you. And she said that if I walk out,

795
00:34:56,239 --> 00:34:58,560
Speaker 3: then don't come back because I won't have a job.

796
00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:01,560
Speaker 3: I walked out without saying another word. After this, I

797
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:03,520
Speaker 3: asked other people from work if I was rude to her,

798
00:35:03,560 --> 00:35:05,759
Speaker 3: and I will admit by the end of arguing, I

799
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:08,719
Speaker 3: was getting pretty angry. However, I never swore at her.

800
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:12,560
Speaker 3: I didn't yell, but I did raise my voice. She, however,

801
00:35:13,120 --> 00:35:16,239
Speaker 3: was cutting me off, swearing at me, and yelling. The

802
00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:18,920
Speaker 3: other people I asked said yes, and so I was

803
00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:21,600
Speaker 3: starting to think that maybe I was the rude one. However,

804
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:23,719
Speaker 3: a couple of months go by and at my other

805
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:25,759
Speaker 3: place of work, one of the girls who I used

806
00:35:25,800 --> 00:35:28,279
Speaker 3: to work with at my sister's workplace started working at

807
00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:30,839
Speaker 3: my job when I wasn't friends with at the time,

808
00:35:31,040 --> 00:35:33,400
Speaker 3: and she told me that she left because my sister

809
00:35:33,480 --> 00:35:36,239
Speaker 3: is toxic. I ran into another coworker a couple of

810
00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:38,360
Speaker 3: months after, and he told me that he saw the

811
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:41,719
Speaker 3: situation and said it was unreasonable to fire me after

812
00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:45,080
Speaker 3: how she treated me, and said that he left because.

813
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:45,359
Speaker 4: Of her too.

814
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:46,400
Speaker 1: Boom.

815
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:48,399
Speaker 3: Yeah, if you're gonna be a bad boss, you're gonna

816
00:35:48,440 --> 00:35:49,200
Speaker 3: lose all your employees.

817
00:35:49,200 --> 00:35:50,960
Speaker 1: You're gonna lose them all. That's the thing.

818
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:54,719
Speaker 5: The sister is thinking that, oh, oh, he can't talk

819
00:35:54,760 --> 00:35:56,640
Speaker 5: to her like that, and is saying like, oh, you're

820
00:35:56,640 --> 00:35:58,879
Speaker 5: treating me like your sister. But the thing is that's

821
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:02,360
Speaker 5: what she's doing. He's treating ope like a sister and

822
00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:05,680
Speaker 5: not an employee. She thinks, oh, hey, can you help me.

823
00:36:05,640 --> 00:36:06,439
Speaker 1: Out a little bit more.

824
00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:09,000
Speaker 3: It's like, no, yes, that's what you would ask your sister,

825
00:36:09,160 --> 00:36:10,600
Speaker 3: not your employee.

826
00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:13,160
Speaker 5: Oh I'm gonna yell at you while we're having an argument.

827
00:36:13,239 --> 00:36:15,759
Speaker 4: That's what you do with your sister, not your employee.

828
00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:16,480
Speaker 1: Exactly.

829
00:36:16,719 --> 00:36:19,879
Speaker 3: I ended up apologizing to my sister because I didn't

830
00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:22,879
Speaker 3: want to leave a relationship angry, and I told her

831
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:25,400
Speaker 3: I want to talk again. I also had my school

832
00:36:25,440 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 3: formal coming up and wanted her to come to my

833
00:36:27,120 --> 00:36:30,279
Speaker 3: photos beforehand, because those photos would only ever happen once,

834
00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:31,320
Speaker 3: to which.

835
00:36:31,080 --> 00:36:34,000
Speaker 1: She responded with, are you a fan? Kidding me? Right now?

836
00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:36,440
Speaker 3: I can get over all the other small fights we

837
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:39,040
Speaker 3: have we have had, and the stupid things that we've

838
00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:41,480
Speaker 3: had arguments about, because I love you. But the second

839
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:45,160
Speaker 3: you bring your childish little chantrums into my workplace, the

840
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:47,799
Speaker 3: place that I have devoted every single ounce of my

841
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:51,799
Speaker 3: energy and being into, I refuse to apologize or act

842
00:36:51,840 --> 00:36:54,480
Speaker 3: like it's okay when it's not. The way you acted

843
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:57,680
Speaker 3: was disgraceful, disrespectful, and had the potential to.

844
00:36:57,800 --> 00:36:59,200
Speaker 1: Threaten my job security.

845
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:01,560
Speaker 3: You invite I didn't mean to your foremo without even

846
00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:04,240
Speaker 3: apologizing to me or acknowledging you were in the wrong.

847
00:37:04,800 --> 00:37:06,480
Speaker 1: Is not you trying to make up with me.

848
00:37:06,760 --> 00:37:09,800
Speaker 3: It's just you being selfish and only thinking about yourself

849
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:12,600
Speaker 3: because apparently that's what you're good at now. And I

850
00:37:12,719 --> 00:37:15,440
Speaker 3: responded with you know that I love you and that

851
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:18,200
Speaker 3: I want a relationship with you. I understand that you

852
00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:20,640
Speaker 3: have gone through a lot, and I get it because

853
00:37:20,680 --> 00:37:23,120
Speaker 3: I have too, and I'm sorry for any part that

854
00:37:23,160 --> 00:37:25,279
Speaker 3: I have played in what has happened. If you were

855
00:37:25,320 --> 00:37:27,919
Speaker 3: to come to photos, they will be at four forty five,

856
00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:31,520
Speaker 3: otherwise it will be too dark. And she said that

857
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:34,480
Speaker 3: wasn't good enough, so I didn't respond. Fast forward a

858
00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:36,480
Speaker 3: couple of months and she asked me to come to

859
00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:38,840
Speaker 3: her birthday, which I said no to because I was

860
00:37:38,880 --> 00:37:42,000
Speaker 3: still hurt and she hadn't come to my birthday in years,

861
00:37:42,239 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 3: not even sent me a message to say happy birthday.

862
00:37:45,040 --> 00:37:46,920
Speaker 3: I asked her to come to my graduation and she

863
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:49,160
Speaker 3: said no, so I decided to not put any more

864
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:51,880
Speaker 3: effort into our relationship and told her that I was

865
00:37:51,920 --> 00:37:54,200
Speaker 3: done being the one to put effort in when she

866
00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:57,239
Speaker 3: doesn't even try to message me unless it benefits her.

867
00:37:57,400 --> 00:37:59,719
Speaker 3: I bring this up now because more drama has gone

868
00:37:59,719 --> 00:38:02,960
Speaker 3: on currently and her firing me was brought up.

869
00:38:03,239 --> 00:38:05,440
Speaker 1: So am I the A hole? And we do have

870
00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:07,799
Speaker 1: an update? But what do we think so far? Is

871
00:38:07,840 --> 00:38:11,920
Speaker 1: op the ahole? No, your sister is clearly a bad boss.

872
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:16,360
Speaker 5: Yeah, and like taking advantage of her employees, including you,

873
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:18,319
Speaker 5: and thinks that she can get away with it because

874
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:20,320
Speaker 5: you your sister, which is not the case.

875
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:24,400
Speaker 3: You've got support from the other employees under her rule,

876
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:25,720
Speaker 3: and they.

877
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:28,320
Speaker 1: Also agree that she is just not a good boss.

878
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:30,960
Speaker 3: The thing is, if you had had that conversation and

879
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:34,239
Speaker 3: then all the other employees had said, wow, like you

880
00:38:34,320 --> 00:38:37,080
Speaker 3: cannot speak to your boss like that, that's not okay,

881
00:38:37,120 --> 00:38:39,160
Speaker 3: blah blah blah blah blah, I'd have been like, yeah,

882
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:42,600
Speaker 3: maybe you said something wrong there, but you left and

883
00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:46,359
Speaker 3: then everyone, like multiple people came to you and said, yeah,

884
00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:48,640
Speaker 3: I quit because she sucks exactly.

885
00:38:48,960 --> 00:38:51,080
Speaker 1: So definitely not the A hole. But we do have

886
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:53,560
Speaker 1: an update, so let's get into it. Update.

887
00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:56,120
Speaker 3: I didn't report my sister because it wasn't a big

888
00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:58,640
Speaker 3: issue at the time. I had another job, so it

889
00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:01,840
Speaker 3: wasn't like I was without income. Second of all, calling

890
00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:03,800
Speaker 3: me the a hole because I tried to make amends

891
00:39:03,840 --> 00:39:07,279
Speaker 3: with my sister is crazy. We are currently in no

892
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:10,399
Speaker 3: contact and I don't let her walk all over be Yes,

893
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:12,279
Speaker 3: I would love a relationship with her, but at the

894
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:16,000
Speaker 3: end of my day, my mental health comes first. I

895
00:39:16,080 --> 00:39:18,160
Speaker 3: wasn't asking if this made me the A hole. I

896
00:39:18,239 --> 00:39:20,560
Speaker 3: was asking if I was the a hole for cutting

897
00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:24,080
Speaker 3: her off. So we're clarifying some things. And lastly, for

898
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:27,680
Speaker 3: the comments, this story isn't fake. Believe me, I wish

899
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:31,560
Speaker 3: it was, but unfortunately it's not. Before saying it's fake,

900
00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:34,000
Speaker 3: ask me to clarify anything, which I will happily do

901
00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:36,359
Speaker 3: to show you that I am telling the truth. This

902
00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:39,120
Speaker 3: happened a year ago, and now more drama has come up,

903
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:42,719
Speaker 3: which I will go through now, and for context, I

904
00:39:42,760 --> 00:39:46,200
Speaker 3: will say my mom wasn't perfect. I definitely have trauma

905
00:39:46,239 --> 00:39:48,360
Speaker 3: that I won't get into for the sake of keeping

906
00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:51,120
Speaker 3: this as short as possible. However, my belief is that

907
00:39:51,160 --> 00:39:53,640
Speaker 3: your own trauma is your own to heal. You cannot

908
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:56,200
Speaker 3: blame other people, which is something that I have focused

909
00:39:56,200 --> 00:39:58,680
Speaker 3: on for the last six years of my life. I

910
00:39:58,840 --> 00:40:01,279
Speaker 3: now have a relationship with my mom that, although it

911
00:40:01,320 --> 00:40:03,920
Speaker 3: isn't perfect, it is still one where I can trust

912
00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:07,000
Speaker 3: her with advice and support. My mom also has had

913
00:40:07,040 --> 00:40:10,200
Speaker 3: a traumatic childhood, and although she tried to break the cycle,

914
00:40:10,280 --> 00:40:12,120
Speaker 3: she was the type of mother who would give you

915
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:15,520
Speaker 3: heaps and heaps of love and care and then switch.

916
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:16,520
Speaker 1: It off when things got bad.

917
00:40:16,719 --> 00:40:19,640
Speaker 3: She isn't perfect, but I love my mom and know

918
00:40:19,800 --> 00:40:21,480
Speaker 3: that she did the best that she could with the

919
00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:24,239
Speaker 3: knowledge she had at the time. She is constantly trying

920
00:40:24,239 --> 00:40:25,959
Speaker 3: to fix as much of the trauma as she can,

921
00:40:26,040 --> 00:40:29,760
Speaker 3: and she apologizes to all of us for our upbringing. However,

922
00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:32,200
Speaker 3: she does still carry a lot of anger, which is

923
00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:34,120
Speaker 3: something that I have voiced to her that I think

924
00:40:34,160 --> 00:40:36,319
Speaker 3: she should heal. For the sake of this update, I

925
00:40:36,320 --> 00:40:38,200
Speaker 3: will not mention my oldest brother as he is not

926
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:40,480
Speaker 3: relevant to the story. I will refer to my older

927
00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:43,600
Speaker 3: brother twenty six male, older sister twenty three female, and

928
00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:44,879
Speaker 3: younger brother seventeen male.

929
00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:46,360
Speaker 1: I haven't talked to my sister since I.

930
00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:48,440
Speaker 3: Asked her to come to my graduation and she said no,

931
00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:52,479
Speaker 3: which was November last year. Since then, I have only

932
00:40:52,520 --> 00:40:54,680
Speaker 3: seen her for a few minutes every couple of months

933
00:40:54,840 --> 00:40:57,239
Speaker 3: when she drops my younger brother off at home, but

934
00:40:57,520 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 3: I don't talk to her. A couple of weeks ago,

935
00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:02,680
Speaker 3: my younger brother broke up with his girlfriend, and yes

936
00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:05,640
Speaker 3: it is only a teenage relationship, but he was very

937
00:41:05,719 --> 00:41:08,640
Speaker 3: hurt by her as she is very manipulative. So I

938
00:41:08,680 --> 00:41:10,480
Speaker 3: thought it would be a nice idea to try and

939
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:12,960
Speaker 3: get all of us siblings together just for an afternoon

940
00:41:12,960 --> 00:41:15,080
Speaker 3: to hang out and support him. I messaged an old

941
00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:17,960
Speaker 3: chat with my other siblings in it, before realizing that

942
00:41:18,000 --> 00:41:20,600
Speaker 3: my sister had blocked me, so I got my older

943
00:41:20,600 --> 00:41:22,759
Speaker 3: brother to add her to the chat. I sent a

944
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:26,399
Speaker 3: message stating the situation and told them when my availability

945
00:41:26,520 --> 00:41:29,200
Speaker 3: was and asked them to send theirs. At first, my

946
00:41:29,400 --> 00:41:31,600
Speaker 3: older brother said that he would check if he was free,

947
00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:35,120
Speaker 3: but then my sister came back I'm paraphrasing here and

948
00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:38,240
Speaker 3: said that she already sees him at work and going

949
00:41:38,280 --> 00:41:40,839
Speaker 3: to hang out together was really pointless because it's not

950
00:41:40,880 --> 00:41:43,399
Speaker 3: going to make him feel better. He's starting my employee.

951
00:41:43,440 --> 00:41:45,239
Speaker 3: I don't need to hang out with him. Why would

952
00:41:45,239 --> 00:41:47,719
Speaker 3: I see him more than when he's working for me?

953
00:41:47,960 --> 00:41:51,120
Speaker 3: That's crazy. He'd at least try to make him feel better.

954
00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:53,840
Speaker 3: My younger brother is really hurt by my family being broken.

955
00:41:54,040 --> 00:41:56,480
Speaker 3: He has nightmares about my older siblings leaving him and

956
00:41:56,480 --> 00:41:59,600
Speaker 3: forgetting about him, so I know how important this hangout

957
00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:02,120
Speaker 3: would be for him. Anyways, I responded by saying that

958
00:42:02,200 --> 00:42:04,399
Speaker 3: seeing him all the time and all of us hanging

959
00:42:04,440 --> 00:42:06,400
Speaker 3: out is very different and that she should know that,

960
00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:10,000
Speaker 3: and this is when it went bad. I know I

961
00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:13,560
Speaker 3: shouldn't have texted that so witchy, but I do apologize.

962
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:16,480
Speaker 3: Later on, my older brother and sister tell me that

963
00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:19,239
Speaker 3: I am reactive and aggressive and I need to learn

964
00:42:19,280 --> 00:42:22,200
Speaker 3: how to communicate over text. But regardless he is in

965
00:42:22,320 --> 00:42:25,279
Speaker 3: high school, he will get over the breakup. I then responded,

966
00:42:25,360 --> 00:42:27,759
Speaker 3: saying that it wasn't just about his breakup, but that

967
00:42:27,880 --> 00:42:30,320
Speaker 3: he felt really disconnected from the family for months.

968
00:42:30,719 --> 00:42:33,480
Speaker 1: I then explained that I was sorry and didn't mean

969
00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:34,680
Speaker 1: for the text to come out that way.

970
00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:37,359
Speaker 3: I just got annoyed because this happens every time trying

971
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:39,200
Speaker 3: to make plans with each other, and we haven't all

972
00:42:39,239 --> 00:42:41,240
Speaker 3: been in the same room as each other for years.

973
00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:44,359
Speaker 3: My sister then responded saying that he's fine and I'm

974
00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:47,560
Speaker 3: overreacting and that I still live at home so I

975
00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:50,160
Speaker 3: don't understand what it's like to be an actual adult.

976
00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:52,879
Speaker 3: She then said that reaching out is a two way

977
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:55,040
Speaker 3: street and if I wanted to hang out, I need

978
00:42:55,080 --> 00:42:55,640
Speaker 3: to ask her.

979
00:42:55,719 --> 00:42:57,680
Speaker 1: She then said that she doesn't want.

980
00:42:57,520 --> 00:43:00,279
Speaker 3: To hang out if I'm constantly having a victim mentality,

981
00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:02,160
Speaker 3: and that's something that I need to fix if I

982
00:43:02,200 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 3: want her in my life. My brother responded and said

983
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:06,640
Speaker 3: that he agrees with her, and it's hard to make

984
00:43:06,680 --> 00:43:10,240
Speaker 3: time for themselves, let alone for socializing. I responded saying

985
00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:13,000
Speaker 3: that I'm also an adult now and I work full time,

986
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:16,520
Speaker 3: have UNI full time, play sports, and have a boyfriend,

987
00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:19,200
Speaker 3: and yet I still find time for them and time

988
00:43:19,239 --> 00:43:22,319
Speaker 3: to decompress. I also buy my own groceries, I clean

989
00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:24,799
Speaker 3: the house all the time, payboard, and do all of

990
00:43:24,840 --> 00:43:27,640
Speaker 3: my own chores. I'm practically living on my own in

991
00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:30,400
Speaker 3: every way apart from my room actually being at my

992
00:43:30,440 --> 00:43:33,239
Speaker 3: mom's house. I then said that I don't even know

993
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:35,640
Speaker 3: them anymore or what they're like, and that me and

994
00:43:35,719 --> 00:43:37,800
Speaker 3: my younger brother feel completely shut out.

995
00:43:37,680 --> 00:43:38,440
Speaker 1: From their lives.

996
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:40,799
Speaker 3: I said that I get frustrated when I reach out

997
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:42,640
Speaker 3: for the first time in months and they say they

998
00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:45,520
Speaker 3: are unavailable. I also told my sister that I am

999
00:43:45,560 --> 00:43:48,160
Speaker 3: reactive because I don't plan on getting close with her

1000
00:43:48,239 --> 00:43:51,120
Speaker 3: again when she pushes me away every time. I then

1001
00:43:51,160 --> 00:43:53,799
Speaker 3: brought up how she never apologized for firing me when

1002
00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:56,440
Speaker 3: I apologize to her for the way I acted. I

1003
00:43:56,480 --> 00:43:59,040
Speaker 3: told her to stop blaming me for once and see

1004
00:43:59,040 --> 00:44:02,160
Speaker 3: it from my person. My brother then said that an

1005
00:44:02,160 --> 00:44:04,640
Speaker 3: employer doesn't apologize for firing.

1006
00:44:04,320 --> 00:44:06,200
Speaker 1: You when you have been disrespectful to them.

1007
00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:08,720
Speaker 3: He said that she was my boss and had every

1008
00:44:08,760 --> 00:44:11,040
Speaker 3: right to snap back to me for undermining her.

1009
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:15,000
Speaker 5: Not true, it's not true, and also like, I'm sorry.

1010
00:44:15,040 --> 00:44:19,799
Speaker 5: The way that she fired Opie was so like blase.

1011
00:44:20,719 --> 00:44:22,479
Speaker 5: She was just like, okay, well if you leave your fire.

1012
00:44:22,600 --> 00:44:25,120
Speaker 1: Opie was just definitely in the right and everyone else

1013
00:44:25,200 --> 00:44:25,840
Speaker 1: is stupid.

1014
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:28,680
Speaker 3: And I said that he doesn't know the full context

1015
00:44:28,680 --> 00:44:30,560
Speaker 3: and only knows that my sister has told him.

1016
00:44:30,640 --> 00:44:33,240
Speaker 1: Plus I apologize for the way that I reacted.

1017
00:44:33,400 --> 00:44:36,200
Speaker 3: I then told him what actually happened, please see the

1018
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:38,759
Speaker 3: original post, and he said that my friends on the

1019
00:44:38,800 --> 00:44:41,520
Speaker 3: shift saying that she was out of line isn't credible,

1020
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:44,600
Speaker 3: but he doesn't understand that I was new to that job,

1021
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:47,359
Speaker 3: so I didn't have any friends at the time. The

1022
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:50,440
Speaker 3: only witnesses I had were those I spoke to after

1023
00:44:50,680 --> 00:44:52,600
Speaker 3: I left the store. He then told me to keep

1024
00:44:52,680 --> 00:44:56,000
Speaker 3: dredging up past drama to justify my poor behavior, and

1025
00:44:56,040 --> 00:45:01,040
Speaker 3: then left the chats. It's not past drama, you asked.

1026
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:02,279
Speaker 3: I guess you didn't ask.

1027
00:45:02,320 --> 00:45:04,040
Speaker 5: You just kind of assumed that you knew what the

1028
00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:06,920
Speaker 5: situation was and then said, Oh, that's not what happened.

1029
00:45:06,960 --> 00:45:07,720
Speaker 1: Here's what happened.

1030
00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:10,800
Speaker 5: He's like, Oh, bring it up past drama.

1031
00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:11,400
Speaker 1: Like you just did that.

1032
00:45:11,520 --> 00:45:13,880
Speaker 3: You need to know the situation, and all of you

1033
00:45:14,120 --> 00:45:17,719
Speaker 3: people need to know that. We've gotten full episodes, more

1034
00:45:17,760 --> 00:45:21,560
Speaker 3: stories just like this one on iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify,

1035
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:24,080
Speaker 3: whatever your favorite podcast app is to search.

1036
00:45:24,120 --> 00:45:28,280
Speaker 1: Okay, story time, get on over there, or you're fired.

1037
00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:32,680
Speaker 1: We have that authority for all of you. They're really scary.

1038
00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:36,520
Speaker 1: It's too much power. I have all the power and

1039
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:37,520
Speaker 1: the worm Queen.

1040
00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:41,040
Speaker 5: You are in my dominion and therefore I have complete

1041
00:45:41,040 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 5: authority over your jobs.

1042
00:45:43,080 --> 00:45:45,240
Speaker 1: But anyway, there is a little bit worse the story.

1043
00:45:45,760 --> 00:45:48,840
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna wrap it right up. Okay, So at this.

1044
00:45:48,719 --> 00:45:51,799
Speaker 3: Point, my sister only started responding again when I brought

1045
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:54,239
Speaker 3: up how people left because of her I.

1046
00:45:54,239 --> 00:45:56,200
Speaker 1: Told her that I'm not telling her.

1047
00:45:56,120 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 3: Who it was because she hasn't put in any effort

1048
00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:01,080
Speaker 3: to actually act like mysis, so I'm not.

1049
00:46:01,040 --> 00:46:02,280
Speaker 1: Going to support her either.

1050
00:46:02,560 --> 00:46:05,759
Speaker 3: And she said, and I quote, you seriously need to

1051
00:46:05,760 --> 00:46:07,760
Speaker 3: seek some professional mental help.

1052
00:46:08,360 --> 00:46:09,640
Speaker 1: So I didn't respond.

1053
00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:12,080
Speaker 3: So am I the a hole for not telling my

1054
00:46:12,160 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 3: sister who left the company because of her?

1055
00:46:14,800 --> 00:46:16,960
Speaker 1: And there are some comments, but what's her answer? No,

1056
00:46:17,239 --> 00:46:19,120
Speaker 1: it doesn't even need to be a question. It's not

1057
00:46:19,200 --> 00:46:20,480
Speaker 1: anything you owe her at all.

1058
00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:23,759
Speaker 3: No. Some comments say you are the a whole. You

1059
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:27,839
Speaker 3: are young, and sorry to say, immature. You think being

1060
00:46:27,880 --> 00:46:31,080
Speaker 3: reasonable from your perspective is the right way, and yet

1061
00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:34,640
Speaker 3: ignore the signs that contradict this. But that's okay. You

1062
00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:37,759
Speaker 3: will learn over time. Getting fired has nothing to do

1063
00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:40,920
Speaker 3: with her being your sister. You chose to get fired,

1064
00:46:41,080 --> 00:46:43,840
Speaker 3: as your manager was very clear about the consequences. You

1065
00:46:43,920 --> 00:46:46,880
Speaker 3: decided that your friend waiting was more important than losing

1066
00:46:46,880 --> 00:46:51,279
Speaker 3: your job. Your opinion about reasonableness is irrelevant. You will

1067
00:46:51,320 --> 00:46:54,480
Speaker 3: find many bosses will do things that you find unreasonable,

1068
00:46:54,640 --> 00:46:58,200
Speaker 3: and then you decide if you stay or leave. All good, However,

1069
00:46:58,360 --> 00:47:00,440
Speaker 3: you continue to bring this up as part of your

1070
00:47:00,440 --> 00:47:04,880
Speaker 3: family discussion. Stem it. It is history in the future.

1071
00:47:05,120 --> 00:47:08,239
Speaker 3: Don't blur the personal and professional lives. If you feel

1072
00:47:08,280 --> 00:47:11,400
Speaker 3: the personal relationship can't be repaired, then it's okay to

1073
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:14,400
Speaker 3: go do contact. But she does not have any reason

1074
00:47:14,440 --> 00:47:18,480
Speaker 3: to apologize to you. And someone else's response to that COVID.

1075
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:21,960
Speaker 5: Wrong commenter Opie's family was bringing up sister and the

1076
00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:24,480
Speaker 5: brother were always bringing it up, saying, oh you were

1077
00:47:24,760 --> 00:47:27,160
Speaker 5: you talked back bad about me, blah blah blah whatever.

1078
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:32,400
Speaker 5: And also I hate the idea that you cannot communicate

1079
00:47:32,520 --> 00:47:36,120
Speaker 5: your needs and rights as an employee to your employer,

1080
00:47:36,239 --> 00:47:39,280
Speaker 5: that you cannot stand up for yourself if your employer

1081
00:47:39,360 --> 00:47:42,200
Speaker 5: is asking you something that is unfair that they have

1082
00:47:42,280 --> 00:47:45,239
Speaker 5: not given you for warning for that, you know, et cetera,

1083
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:47,680
Speaker 5: et cetera, like say, hey, you know, don't just let

1084
00:47:47,719 --> 00:47:50,320
Speaker 5: them walk all over you. Obviously, sometimes that can lead

1085
00:47:50,719 --> 00:47:54,120
Speaker 5: to consequences. They might fire you blah blah blah, in

1086
00:47:54,160 --> 00:47:56,279
Speaker 5: which case hopefully you can get some.

1087
00:47:56,400 --> 00:47:59,319
Speaker 4: Legal you know. Root course, if your boss is treating

1088
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:00,680
Speaker 4: you unfairly, don't not take it.

1089
00:48:00,840 --> 00:48:02,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like this commentary was just like, ah,

1090
00:48:02,600 --> 00:48:04,640
Speaker 3: there's all bosses are just like terrible like that you

1091
00:48:04,680 --> 00:48:05,239
Speaker 3: just have to deal with it.

1092
00:48:05,239 --> 00:48:08,080
Speaker 1: You just have to deal with it. It's like no, no, no, no, no,

1093
00:48:08,760 --> 00:48:11,239
Speaker 1: stand up for workers. You know.

1094
00:48:11,640 --> 00:48:14,680
Speaker 3: You called Opie immature for wanting to leave work after

1095
00:48:14,760 --> 00:48:18,680
Speaker 3: her shift ended, But that's okay, you will learn over time.

1096
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:22,200
Speaker 3: And Opie response to that, I didn't decide that my

1097
00:48:22,280 --> 00:48:24,719
Speaker 3: friend waiting was more important than losing my job.

1098
00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:26,520
Speaker 1: I decided that I wasn't going to.

1099
00:48:26,440 --> 00:48:29,319
Speaker 3: Be berated by her anymore because I wanted to leave

1100
00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:33,080
Speaker 3: at my intended shift end time. I brought up her

1101
00:48:33,120 --> 00:48:35,520
Speaker 3: firing me in the discussion because I was explaining how

1102
00:48:35,520 --> 00:48:38,880
Speaker 3: these situations occur over and over again and I'm always made.

1103
00:48:38,640 --> 00:48:39,640
Speaker 1: Out to be the bad guy.

1104
00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:42,680
Speaker 3: I brought it up because it was unresolved and needed

1105
00:48:42,680 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 3: to be resolved going forward.

1106
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:46,680
Speaker 5: Her sister said, literally when she tried to bring it

1107
00:48:46,760 --> 00:48:48,560
Speaker 5: up and like get past at her sister was like,

1108
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:50,880
Speaker 5: how dare you?

1109
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:56,040
Speaker 4: You almost made me lose my job security. It's like okay.

1110
00:48:56,640 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 4: Clearly her sister was not over that.

1111
00:48:58,640 --> 00:49:01,840
Speaker 3: But Opie's response continue is also I'm a store manager

1112
00:49:01,880 --> 00:49:04,319
Speaker 3: myself and have never treated a staff member the way

1113
00:49:04,360 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 3: she treated me, and I had my younger brother work for.

1114
00:49:07,680 --> 00:49:10,479
Speaker 1: Me at a time as well. Someone else responds, I.

1115
00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:12,239
Speaker 3: Agree with this. The two of you will never bend

1116
00:49:12,280 --> 00:49:15,640
Speaker 3: because you both think that you're right, So just agree

1117
00:49:15,719 --> 00:49:18,360
Speaker 3: to disagree and drop it. If she was just a

1118
00:49:18,400 --> 00:49:21,160
Speaker 3: former employer, she would not have to explain herself to

1119
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:24,560
Speaker 3: a former employee the facts that you want to have

1120
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:28,120
Speaker 3: a heart to heart about this in itself expecting special treatment.

1121
00:49:28,280 --> 00:49:31,600
Speaker 5: But I also kind of disagree with that because there

1122
00:49:31,840 --> 00:49:36,440
Speaker 5: is a difference in how you treat a regular employee

1123
00:49:37,000 --> 00:49:39,480
Speaker 5: and how you treat an employee as your family, because

1124
00:49:39,520 --> 00:49:41,680
Speaker 5: you also have outside time where you see them, but

1125
00:49:41,800 --> 00:49:46,600
Speaker 5: you have two simultaneous relationships going on with that person

1126
00:49:47,120 --> 00:49:48,600
Speaker 5: and you have to manage both.

1127
00:49:48,719 --> 00:49:51,560
Speaker 3: You can like treat her as a sister in the

1128
00:49:51,600 --> 00:49:53,880
Speaker 3: sense where you're going to explain yourself a little bit

1129
00:49:53,880 --> 00:49:55,000
Speaker 3: more like that's really it.

1130
00:49:55,080 --> 00:49:57,520
Speaker 1: When you disagree with the boss, you either learn to

1131
00:49:57,600 --> 00:49:58,680
Speaker 1: live with it or leave.

1132
00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:01,360
Speaker 3: You may be a better boss now, but that's not

1133
00:50:01,640 --> 00:50:03,240
Speaker 3: how she runs her company.

1134
00:50:03,520 --> 00:50:05,359
Speaker 1: You chose to leave and you are better for it,

1135
00:50:05,480 --> 00:50:08,560
Speaker 1: so let it go, and that's the end of that story.

1136
00:50:08,840 --> 00:50:09,319
Speaker 1: I don't know.

1137
00:50:09,480 --> 00:50:12,520
Speaker 3: I think forget about this stuff because it's clearly just

1138
00:50:12,560 --> 00:50:14,280
Speaker 3: a headache and it's not going to be resolved.

1139
00:50:14,680 --> 00:50:17,000
Speaker 1: If someone's ending a conversation with.

1140
00:50:17,200 --> 00:50:20,160
Speaker 3: You need serious mental help, then they don't know what

1141
00:50:20,200 --> 00:50:22,200
Speaker 3: they're talking about because they have nothing else to say,

1142
00:50:22,320 --> 00:50:25,920
Speaker 3: you need serious mental help. That's just like a default lie.

1143
00:50:26,160 --> 00:50:26,399
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1144
00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:29,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, So just don't worry about that stuff anymore, or

1145
00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:32,520
Speaker 3: like call her or see her in person and talk

1146
00:50:32,560 --> 00:50:36,040
Speaker 3: about it in person. But until then, just try to

1147
00:50:36,080 --> 00:50:38,480
Speaker 3: hang out. And if people aren't free, then they're not

1148
00:50:38,600 --> 00:50:40,440
Speaker 3: free and they don't want to hang on and that's.

1149
00:50:40,320 --> 00:50:41,000
Speaker 1: A big bummer.

1150
00:50:41,320 --> 00:50:44,520
Speaker 5: They're not gonna really prioritize me in their life. And

1151
00:50:44,560 --> 00:50:47,040
Speaker 5: also they fired me, so maybe we're not that close.

1152
00:50:47,200 --> 00:50:51,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe they're not that great d after all. But

1153
00:50:51,719 --> 00:50:54,799
Speaker 1: that's the end of that story. Hey it's Sam. We're

1154
00:50:54,840 --> 00:50:56,640
Speaker 1: gonna get back to the stories. But here's three minutes

1155
00:50:56,680 --> 00:50:57,680
Speaker 1: bads from our sponsors.

1156
00:50:58,160 --> 00:51:01,280
Speaker 5: I made my sister cry on her wedding day because

1157
00:51:01,320 --> 00:51:03,160
Speaker 5: I'm not following her rules.

1158
00:51:03,280 --> 00:51:04,560
Speaker 1: Oh crimea river.

1159
00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:09,400
Speaker 5: About a year ago, my forty one female sister thirty

1160
00:51:09,480 --> 00:51:12,759
Speaker 5: three female sent out her safe the dates she was

1161
00:51:12,800 --> 00:51:16,080
Speaker 5: getting married, less than a week before my son's eighteenth birthday.

1162
00:51:16,200 --> 00:51:18,600
Speaker 5: Since my family is all over the country, my son

1163
00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:21,480
Speaker 5: has never had a big birthday celebration. My sister was

1164
00:51:21,520 --> 00:51:24,120
Speaker 5: planning a post wedding brunch the day after the ceremony

1165
00:51:24,280 --> 00:51:26,960
Speaker 5: or in reception, and I asked if she would be

1166
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:29,040
Speaker 5: okay if we could do something for my son in

1167
00:51:29,080 --> 00:51:32,640
Speaker 5: the afternoon, since family will already be gathered for her wedding.

1168
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:35,960
Speaker 5: She loved the idea, and I ran it by my

1169
00:51:36,040 --> 00:51:38,480
Speaker 5: son and reminded him he can do something with his

1170
00:51:38,480 --> 00:51:41,480
Speaker 5: friends on his actual birthday. Both were happy with the idea.

1171
00:51:41,760 --> 00:51:44,239
Speaker 5: I even chose of any away from the hotel we'd

1172
00:51:44,280 --> 00:51:46,520
Speaker 5: all be staying at, so my sister wouldn't feel we

1173
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:49,239
Speaker 5: were encroaching on her wedding. By the way, this comes

1174
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:51,440
Speaker 5: from wedding whoopsie. And if you want to spend your

1175
00:51:51,480 --> 00:51:53,760
Speaker 5: own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime supper

1176
00:51:53,760 --> 00:51:57,960
Speaker 5: in it All good, so far, no problems. Six months

1177
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:00,840
Speaker 5: ago the invitations came and I are appede for me

1178
00:52:00,880 --> 00:52:01,399
Speaker 5: and my son.

1179
00:52:01,640 --> 00:52:03,480
Speaker 1: Ex husband is not in the picture.

1180
00:52:03,760 --> 00:52:06,360
Speaker 3: Meal options were a beef dish or a fish dish.

1181
00:52:06,640 --> 00:52:10,319
Speaker 3: I rsvped for two beef dinners. Now on to the

1182
00:52:10,360 --> 00:52:12,840
Speaker 3: problem and where I'm being told I'm in the wrong.

1183
00:52:13,200 --> 00:52:16,680
Speaker 3: At the reception yesterday, my almost eighteen year old son

1184
00:52:17,440 --> 00:52:21,480
Speaker 3: was given a child's meal chicken nuggets and steak fries.

1185
00:52:21,800 --> 00:52:23,960
Speaker 3: I told the server there was a mistake and we

1186
00:52:24,080 --> 00:52:26,719
Speaker 3: are svped for the beef dish. The server took the

1187
00:52:26,719 --> 00:52:28,959
Speaker 3: plate and brought out a beef dinner two minutes later.

1188
00:52:29,440 --> 00:52:32,560
Speaker 3: For clarification, this wasn't a child free wedding and there

1189
00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:35,560
Speaker 3: were about five kids that aged four to nine or

1190
00:52:35,600 --> 00:52:38,640
Speaker 3: so at the brunch today. My sister pretty much ignored

1191
00:52:38,680 --> 00:52:41,520
Speaker 3: me and was really cold when she did talk to me.

1192
00:52:41,880 --> 00:52:43,719
Speaker 3: As it was ending, I asked if she was still

1193
00:52:43,760 --> 00:52:46,440
Speaker 3: coming to my son's celebration, since she seemed like she

1194
00:52:46,520 --> 00:52:48,239
Speaker 3: was mad at me. She pulled out a piece of

1195
00:52:48,239 --> 00:52:51,680
Speaker 3: paper and said, maybe I'll come once you pay this.

1196
00:52:52,480 --> 00:52:55,360
Speaker 3: The paper was an invoice she made up for seventy

1197
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:56,800
Speaker 3: seven dollars.

1198
00:52:56,320 --> 00:52:57,400
Speaker 4: For an extra dinner.

1199
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,680
Speaker 5: The steak was seventy seven dollars.

1200
00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:02,920
Speaker 3: How it is a weddings, we're having a barbecue at

1201
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:05,600
Speaker 3: my wedding. I was confused and asked her what it

1202
00:53:05,640 --> 00:53:08,480
Speaker 3: was about. And apparently my nearly eighteen year old son

1203
00:53:08,600 --> 00:53:12,000
Speaker 3: was supposed to get a child's meal and the caterer

1204
00:53:12,080 --> 00:53:15,080
Speaker 3: was charging my sister an additional seventy seven dollars and

1205
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:18,560
Speaker 3: that it was my fault tip to provide an additional meal.

1206
00:53:18,760 --> 00:53:21,920
Speaker 3: I told her that one I had RSVP'd and chosen

1207
00:53:21,920 --> 00:53:24,759
Speaker 3: the adult meal for him months ago, and two he's

1208
00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:26,960
Speaker 3: a seventeen year old. How would anyone think a meal

1209
00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:29,359
Speaker 3: of four chicken nuggets and a handful of fries would

1210
00:53:29,360 --> 00:53:32,359
Speaker 3: be enough for him? It became this big blow up,

1211
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:35,040
Speaker 3: and my sister turned it into people having to take

1212
00:53:35,239 --> 00:53:38,719
Speaker 3: sides and surprise, my son's birthday party ended up being

1213
00:53:38,760 --> 00:53:41,800
Speaker 3: a disaster that almost no one attended because your sister

1214
00:53:41,920 --> 00:53:43,359
Speaker 3: is the bride and she makes the.

1215
00:53:43,360 --> 00:53:44,279
Speaker 4: Rules on her day.

1216
00:53:44,520 --> 00:53:48,680
Speaker 5: Even our mom skipped it because my sister was inconsolable.

1217
00:53:48,840 --> 00:53:51,560
Speaker 5: I still think I'm being perfectly reasonable.

1218
00:53:51,840 --> 00:53:53,520
Speaker 1: Am I really this wrong.

1219
00:53:53,280 --> 00:53:57,360
Speaker 5: About wedding etiquette? Relevant comments partially Star says Nope, you

1220
00:53:57,440 --> 00:53:59,880
Speaker 5: didn't break etiquette. Your sister is insane. You are as

1221
00:54:00,120 --> 00:54:02,640
Speaker 5: vpeed for beef. He should have gotten beef. No one

1222
00:54:02,640 --> 00:54:05,480
Speaker 5: over the age of eleven eats kids meals, and OP

1223
00:54:05,680 --> 00:54:07,960
Speaker 5: says thank you. I feel like once a child is

1224
00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:12,400
Speaker 5: a teenager, they graduate to the adult table and meal. Well, honestly,

1225
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:14,920
Speaker 5: I feel like this is the parent's decision. You know,

1226
00:54:15,000 --> 00:54:17,879
Speaker 5: it's a parent child's co decision on what they need

1227
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:20,120
Speaker 5: to eat. And so you know, if you have a

1228
00:54:20,160 --> 00:54:23,120
Speaker 5: ten year old who's like, I'm a growing ten year old,

1229
00:54:23,160 --> 00:54:25,960
Speaker 5: I need a full meal, then that's the parent's decision

1230
00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:27,880
Speaker 5: if they get the kid a full meal. This boy's

1231
00:54:27,920 --> 00:54:31,440
Speaker 5: seventeen Global fact seven seven five two. I'm sorry, I

1232
00:54:31,520 --> 00:54:34,600
Speaker 5: agree with you. Here's what's on to me. Someone had

1233
00:54:34,640 --> 00:54:36,880
Speaker 5: to have given the caterer account of how many adult

1234
00:54:36,960 --> 00:54:40,319
Speaker 5: meals and how many children's meals. Nobody in the right

1235
00:54:40,320 --> 00:54:42,480
Speaker 5: mind would tell a caterer a child's meal for a

1236
00:54:42,520 --> 00:54:46,040
Speaker 5: seventeen year old. My son was man sized at almost eighteen,

1237
00:54:46,080 --> 00:54:49,200
Speaker 5: and I'm sure yours is as well. Now on your behalf,

1238
00:54:49,280 --> 00:54:51,520
Speaker 5: I would have done the exact same thing. I would

1239
00:54:51,560 --> 00:54:54,240
Speaker 5: have immediately assumed the kitchen that's simply made a mistake.

1240
00:54:54,600 --> 00:54:57,680
Speaker 5: Something is rotten in Denmark here because someone had to

1241
00:54:57,719 --> 00:55:01,279
Speaker 5: have counted your son as a child, which bizarre. I

1242
00:55:01,320 --> 00:55:03,600
Speaker 5: won't even go into the caterer charging that much for

1243
00:55:03,680 --> 00:55:08,040
Speaker 5: a plate, just ridiculous. Secondly, it was your sister's choice

1244
00:55:08,040 --> 00:55:10,480
Speaker 5: to get all worked up in mad at her own wedding.

1245
00:55:10,880 --> 00:55:13,200
Speaker 5: This is something that could have been easily addressed at

1246
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:16,200
Speaker 5: a later time. I can't see where you did anything wrong,

1247
00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:18,680
Speaker 5: But the takeaway from this is somebody turned in one

1248
00:55:18,719 --> 00:55:22,160
Speaker 5: adult and one child onto the caterer. No offense, your

1249
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:26,920
Speaker 5: sister sounds like a piece of work, Opie says. But

1250
00:55:27,040 --> 00:55:29,280
Speaker 5: the takeaway from this is somebody turned in one adult

1251
00:55:29,280 --> 00:55:33,640
Speaker 5: and one child onto the caterer. Exactly. The RSPP didn't

1252
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:36,400
Speaker 5: go directly to the caterer, so at some point my

1253
00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:39,560
Speaker 5: sister decided to give my son a kid's meal. And

1254
00:55:39,760 --> 00:55:42,120
Speaker 5: if this was such an issue, why didn't she immediately

1255
00:55:42,120 --> 00:55:45,000
Speaker 5: address it with me? Dolphine Darko says, I would love

1256
00:55:45,040 --> 00:55:47,960
Speaker 5: to know what the bride's actual attendance was. Did everyone

1257
00:55:48,040 --> 00:55:50,640
Speaker 5: actually show up and were they short a beef plate?

1258
00:55:50,760 --> 00:55:54,000
Speaker 5: I find that very hard to believe. Please forward these

1259
00:55:54,040 --> 00:55:58,000
Speaker 5: responses to your family. They are absolutely crazy to take

1260
00:55:58,000 --> 00:56:00,600
Speaker 5: her side, Opie says. The reception was about one hundred

1261
00:56:00,600 --> 00:56:03,560
Speaker 5: and eighty people. I do know at least four didn't

1262
00:56:03,560 --> 00:56:06,320
Speaker 5: show up since my mom complained about it to me. Sisters,

1263
00:56:06,320 --> 00:56:09,200
Speaker 5: coworker's family got the VID. I wonder if they'll get

1264
00:56:09,239 --> 00:56:13,360
Speaker 5: invoices too, and there is an update, But like excellent

1265
00:56:13,480 --> 00:56:16,640
Speaker 5: question for the caterers four people that at least one

1266
00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:18,600
Speaker 5: of them had to have ordered the beef unless they

1267
00:56:18,680 --> 00:56:21,520
Speaker 5: all order the fish. But yeah, like, why wasn't one

1268
00:56:21,560 --> 00:56:23,920
Speaker 5: of those plates used? This makes no sense.

1269
00:56:23,719 --> 00:56:26,200
Speaker 1: Exactly, And I'm also kind of confused. I don't know

1270
00:56:26,239 --> 00:56:28,440
Speaker 1: if the caterer just seems kind of whacked.

1271
00:56:28,440 --> 00:56:30,759
Speaker 3: I don't know if this is just how I interpreted

1272
00:56:30,800 --> 00:56:33,080
Speaker 3: it or heard it or something. But like, was the

1273
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:35,719
Speaker 3: bride was given the invoice like in the middle of

1274
00:56:35,760 --> 00:56:39,160
Speaker 3: the wedding or was that like was that a later conversation.

1275
00:56:39,320 --> 00:56:41,000
Speaker 1: That's a good question. I'm on it.

1276
00:56:41,080 --> 00:56:43,319
Speaker 3: When she pulled up the invoice, it sounded like it

1277
00:56:43,360 --> 00:56:44,479
Speaker 3: was just in the middle of the wedding.

1278
00:56:44,520 --> 00:56:45,960
Speaker 1: She's like, this is why I'm not talking to you.

1279
00:56:46,120 --> 00:56:48,239
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go ahead and do my own wedding thing,

1280
00:56:48,400 --> 00:56:49,959
Speaker 3: you know, and dance around or something.

1281
00:56:50,080 --> 00:56:52,960
Speaker 5: Something's fishy about this caterer. But there's an update I

1282
00:56:53,040 --> 00:56:54,960
Speaker 5: posted a few days ago. And I'm not sure if

1283
00:56:54,960 --> 00:56:58,040
Speaker 5: this sub allows for or welcomes updates. We do them,

1284
00:56:58,080 --> 00:57:00,560
Speaker 5: but here it is. It's not good. My post was

1285
00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:03,640
Speaker 5: about my sister ordering a children's meal for my seventeen

1286
00:57:03,719 --> 00:57:06,640
Speaker 5: year old son at her reception and throwing a fit

1287
00:57:06,719 --> 00:57:09,160
Speaker 5: the next day and invoicing me to pay for his

1288
00:57:09,320 --> 00:57:12,800
Speaker 5: extra adult meal that he wasn't supposed to get. Thank

1289
00:57:12,840 --> 00:57:15,600
Speaker 5: you all for confirming it was correct that my son

1290
00:57:15,680 --> 00:57:17,160
Speaker 5: should have been given the adult meal.

1291
00:57:17,280 --> 00:57:18,480
Speaker 1: We aresv peede with.

1292
00:57:18,560 --> 00:57:21,760
Speaker 2: The invoice was given at a brunch the next day,

1293
00:57:22,240 --> 00:57:25,360
Speaker 2: so they didn't get the invoice at the actual reception.

1294
00:57:25,640 --> 00:57:29,520
Speaker 5: I found out it was all planned, of course, it

1295
00:57:29,720 --> 00:57:33,080
Speaker 5: was after my sister agreed for my son davis milestone

1296
00:57:33,120 --> 00:57:35,800
Speaker 5: eighteenth birthday celebrated the day after the wedding. Since all

1297
00:57:35,800 --> 00:57:38,480
Speaker 5: family would already be there for the wedding, she decided

1298
00:57:38,560 --> 00:57:41,480
Speaker 5: she didn't want to share her weekend anymore, which.

1299
00:57:41,200 --> 00:57:42,000
Speaker 1: She could have said.

1300
00:57:42,120 --> 00:57:44,720
Speaker 5: She could have said, Hey, you know, I understand why

1301
00:57:44,760 --> 00:57:47,680
Speaker 5: you wanted to throw the Sun's birthday party. Don't think

1302
00:57:47,680 --> 00:57:49,280
Speaker 5: I want to do it on this weekend. Could have

1303
00:57:49,320 --> 00:57:51,560
Speaker 5: said that, yes, she got Friday for the versal and

1304
00:57:51,680 --> 00:57:55,240
Speaker 5: versal dinner, Saturday for the ceremony and reception, and apparently

1305
00:57:55,320 --> 00:57:58,520
Speaker 5: needed all of Sunday too. Would the reasonable thing be

1306
00:57:58,640 --> 00:58:00,760
Speaker 5: to tell me she was no longer comfortable with my

1307
00:58:00,840 --> 00:58:04,720
Speaker 5: son's party, Yes, and I would have canceled then postponed it.

1308
00:58:04,960 --> 00:58:08,520
Speaker 5: What the reasonable thing to be to manufacture some petty

1309
00:58:08,600 --> 00:58:11,600
Speaker 5: beef and turn everyone against me and my son, resulting

1310
00:58:11,600 --> 00:58:13,800
Speaker 5: in almost no one's showing up. Apparently, Yes to my

1311
00:58:13,880 --> 00:58:14,760
Speaker 5: sister and mother.

1312
00:58:14,600 --> 00:58:16,760
Speaker 1: Well, it wasn't petty beef because it was seventy seven dollars.

1313
00:58:16,840 --> 00:58:17,720
Speaker 1: It's more than petty.

1314
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:22,520
Speaker 5: It was very expensive beef. Because that makeshift invoice. I

1315
00:58:22,720 --> 00:58:25,640
Speaker 5: had another look at it after I posted. Printed on

1316
00:58:25,720 --> 00:58:30,000
Speaker 5: an inkjet printer that slightly bleeds red even on black

1317
00:58:30,040 --> 00:58:34,720
Speaker 5: and white, just like my mother's old faulty printer, which

1318
00:58:34,760 --> 00:58:38,200
Speaker 5: means she printed it before the wedding, so that it

1319
00:58:38,360 --> 00:58:41,040
Speaker 5: wasn't the cater's fault. They probably never charged the oh

1320
00:58:41,080 --> 00:58:44,720
Speaker 5: B me b. It was actually my son that noticed

1321
00:58:44,760 --> 00:58:47,360
Speaker 5: and mentioned it looked like it came from my mom's

1322
00:58:47,480 --> 00:58:48,240
Speaker 5: crappy printer.

1323
00:58:48,480 --> 00:58:50,360
Speaker 1: But you know what I'm noticing?

1324
00:58:50,440 --> 00:58:52,560
Speaker 3: What are you noticing the fact that we have all

1325
00:58:52,560 --> 00:58:56,120
Speaker 3: these full episodes for you to listen to with stories

1326
00:58:56,400 --> 00:58:59,120
Speaker 3: just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcast, or

1327
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:01,560
Speaker 3: iHeartRadio and search a Pookeast story time Tivity.

1328
00:59:01,560 --> 00:59:02,160
Speaker 1: Final thoughts.

1329
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:06,560
Speaker 3: The way that that like last sentence was, uh, it

1330
00:59:06,720 --> 00:59:08,640
Speaker 3: really feel like a Scooby Doo episode over here.

1331
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:11,120
Speaker 5: I mean, did my sister really spend her wedding night

1332
00:59:11,360 --> 00:59:15,080
Speaker 5: creating an invoice? Of course, it was already prepared. This

1333
00:59:15,240 --> 00:59:18,840
Speaker 5: was all planned. I called my mom and.

1334
00:59:19,240 --> 00:59:22,160
Speaker 3: Confronted her yesterday and she just said, it was your

1335
00:59:22,240 --> 00:59:25,360
Speaker 3: sister's wedding. All the attention she'd have been on her anyway,

1336
00:59:25,960 --> 00:59:26,920
Speaker 3: Why didn't you say that?

1337
00:59:27,120 --> 00:59:29,920
Speaker 1: Now I'm just imagining the wedding night that. The husband

1338
00:59:30,040 --> 00:59:32,520
Speaker 1: is like, babe, come back to bed. She's like, wait,

1339
00:59:32,600 --> 00:59:35,360
Speaker 1: I have to finish it. I'm curiously typing this invoice.

1340
00:59:35,720 --> 00:59:38,280
Speaker 1: He goes, oh, babe, are you talking your villain voice again?

1341
00:59:38,320 --> 00:59:38,959
Speaker 1: What are you doing?

1342
00:59:39,240 --> 00:59:39,640
Speaker 2: Oh?

1343
00:59:39,680 --> 00:59:43,400
Speaker 1: She'll never cross me again. Her wedding was on Saturday.

1344
00:59:43,600 --> 00:59:44,600
Speaker 1: She doesn't own.

1345
00:59:44,480 --> 00:59:48,080
Speaker 5: Sunday, that's the Lord's Day, doesn't own it. So they

1346
00:59:48,200 --> 00:59:50,640
Speaker 5: humiliated my son so she can play princess for an

1347
00:59:50,640 --> 00:59:53,320
Speaker 5: extra day. Honestly, things have been bad in the past,

1348
00:59:53,360 --> 00:59:55,440
Speaker 5: but for the past five years I thought I was

1349
00:59:55,560 --> 00:59:59,720
Speaker 5: really making progress with my mom. But I'm questioning her

1350
00:59:59,800 --> 01:00:03,040
Speaker 5: role in my life now more than ever. Even worse,

1351
01:00:03,120 --> 01:00:05,200
Speaker 5: my son no longer wants anything to do with both

1352
01:00:05,240 --> 01:00:05,840
Speaker 5: of them, and.

1353
01:00:05,800 --> 01:00:07,320
Speaker 1: Maybe that's for the best.

1354
01:00:07,760 --> 01:00:12,800
Speaker 3: And there are some relevant comments circus slav says, this

1355
01:00:12,960 --> 01:00:16,120
Speaker 3: is absolutely wild. I guess I can see wanting all

1356
01:00:16,160 --> 01:00:18,040
Speaker 3: the attention on the couple the day of, but the

1357
01:00:18,040 --> 01:00:21,720
Speaker 3: fact that she saw celebrating her nephew the day after

1358
01:00:21,880 --> 01:00:25,520
Speaker 3: her wedding with all her family around as a burden,

1359
01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:29,000
Speaker 3: taking attention away from her own pretty princess special weekend

1360
01:00:29,400 --> 01:00:32,360
Speaker 3: instead of being overjoyed to share a fun, happy milestone

1361
01:00:32,400 --> 01:00:35,840
Speaker 3: with him is gross. Oh P says that's the thing

1362
01:00:35,920 --> 01:00:38,800
Speaker 3: that bothers me. At any point, she could have said,

1363
01:00:39,400 --> 01:00:41,280
Speaker 3: I thought about it some more and I really want

1364
01:00:41,320 --> 01:00:43,360
Speaker 3: the attention of the weekend to be on me. I

1365
01:00:43,360 --> 01:00:46,360
Speaker 3: would have been annoyed but canceled the birthday party, But

1366
01:00:46,480 --> 01:00:49,440
Speaker 3: to not say anything and cause this blow up is

1367
01:00:49,680 --> 01:00:53,160
Speaker 3: really out of this world, okay, Cryptographers.

1368
01:00:52,520 --> 01:00:53,560
Speaker 1: Thirteen oh two.

1369
01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:56,560
Speaker 5: Can I see being slightly annoyed at a nephew's b

1370
01:00:56,720 --> 01:00:59,640
Speaker 5: day party the day after the wedding? Maybe, but I'm

1371
01:00:59,640 --> 01:01:04,000
Speaker 5: absolutely passing away that she had him served a kid's portion,

1372
01:01:04,160 --> 01:01:07,240
Speaker 5: like he isn't eating more than most adults at almost eighteen.

1373
01:01:07,640 --> 01:01:10,840
Speaker 5: I mean, just every step of her plot makes no sense.

1374
01:01:11,040 --> 01:01:13,520
Speaker 5: Opie says, I totally get it. When I first approached

1375
01:01:13,520 --> 01:01:16,280
Speaker 5: her about it, it was only because it's a milestone birthday,

1376
01:01:16,360 --> 01:01:19,480
Speaker 5: and my extended family is spread throughout the country, so

1377
01:01:19,520 --> 01:01:22,080
Speaker 5: it meant everyone who came to the wedding could also

1378
01:01:22,240 --> 01:01:26,240
Speaker 5: celebrate my son's birthday. I even booked an entirely different

1379
01:01:26,320 --> 01:01:29,480
Speaker 5: venue so she wouldn't feel encroached on. If she or

1380
01:01:29,560 --> 01:01:32,200
Speaker 5: even my son wasn't okay with it, I wouldn't oppressed

1381
01:01:32,200 --> 01:01:35,400
Speaker 5: the issue at all. I legitimately thought she was happy

1382
01:01:35,520 --> 01:01:39,280
Speaker 5: with extending the festivities. Well she's legitimately kind of crazy.

1383
01:01:39,320 --> 01:01:41,240
Speaker 5: So that's the end of the story.

1384
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:44,680
Speaker 3: But wow, wow, I don't understand.

1385
01:01:44,840 --> 01:01:47,920
Speaker 1: Yeah really just stated in a whole coup. Oh that

1386
01:01:48,080 --> 01:01:51,320
Speaker 1: was so wild. But that's the end of that story, folks.