WEBVTT - #175 This means divorce. What's next? 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:03.680 I'm so sorry, brother, I'm so sorry that you are 0:00:04.360 --> 0:00:08.440 in this. This is not the card that you wanted 0:00:08.440 --> 0:00:23.560 to play, but it's the card you were dealt. What's up, everybody, 0:00:23.600 --> 0:00:26.680 Welcome to the podcast. Thank you for watching and listening 0:00:26.680 --> 0:00:29.240 wherever you're coming from. What I do here is I 0:00:29.320 --> 0:00:32.920 answer your questions, super easy, super casual. You email me 0:00:33.479 --> 0:00:37.199 Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com. We walk through them 0:00:37.240 --> 0:00:39.400 just like we're on a road trip together. I'm going 0:00:39.440 --> 0:00:42.680 to answer like a friend, and I have no notes, 0:00:43.040 --> 0:00:45.840 no quotes, nothing prepared in front of me. In fact, 0:00:46.159 --> 0:00:49.320 I haven't even read any of these questions ready to 0:00:49.360 --> 0:00:52.360 go here at all, totally random. I have no idea 0:00:52.440 --> 0:00:55.000 what I'm getting into. They're straight from you, guys, and 0:00:55.080 --> 0:00:58.520 this is episode one seventy five. Let's get started here. 0:00:59.440 --> 0:01:04.280 First question, no subject line. It says, hey, granger my 0:01:04.360 --> 0:01:07.040 name is Noah. I have a question about my family. 0:01:07.120 --> 0:01:09.880 My parents got divorced when I was about five years old. 0:01:09.920 --> 0:01:13.080 I'm now seventeen, and for the past three years, my 0:01:13.200 --> 0:01:16.720 father has not spoken to me. I haven't seen him 0:01:16.880 --> 0:01:19.319 in a year. All of this because my stepmom caused 0:01:19.360 --> 0:01:22.440 a series of events that created a disaster for our family, 0:01:22.800 --> 0:01:25.800 a family all of us thought could never be broken. 0:01:26.280 --> 0:01:28.319 My father has turned his back on me and my 0:01:28.360 --> 0:01:31.240 brother and his grandma who raised him, and our cousins. 0:01:31.600 --> 0:01:34.760 The family and the farm is in shambles lately. I 0:01:34.800 --> 0:01:38.360 really miss my father. I guess what I'm asking is 0:01:39.160 --> 0:01:43.440 what do you think I should do? Wow? Yeah, Noah? 0:01:43.520 --> 0:01:49.960 Thank you for kicking off the podcast with a a 0:01:50.080 --> 0:01:55.040 very deep question. And I'm so sorry brother, I'm so 0:01:55.120 --> 0:01:58.560 sorry that you are in this. This is not the 0:02:00.080 --> 0:02:03.120 card that you wanted to play, but it's the card 0:02:03.120 --> 0:02:06.760 you were dealt, right, And that's that's what we could 0:02:06.760 --> 0:02:11.079 all say about ourselves. We don't always enjoy what we're 0:02:11.120 --> 0:02:14.400 doing or say that this is where we thought we 0:02:14.440 --> 0:02:17.200 would be, or this is what we would choose to be, 0:02:18.320 --> 0:02:21.160 as far from that. Life is so much more just 0:02:21.200 --> 0:02:24.040 about the hand that we're dealt. How do we play it? 0:02:25.919 --> 0:02:29.280 How do we play the hand that we're dealt without 0:02:29.360 --> 0:02:32.480 looking around and saying, man, that family over there across 0:02:32.520 --> 0:02:35.440 the street, they're doing pretty good. Why do I get 0:02:35.480 --> 0:02:41.320 this hand? Instead of asking why, change it to what 0:02:41.320 --> 0:02:43.200 what am I going to do with this? What am 0:02:43.240 --> 0:02:45.080 I going to do with the hand I'm dealt? How 0:02:45.080 --> 0:02:48.720 am I going to play this? Instead of why you can't? 0:02:48.760 --> 0:02:51.880 You can't respond to why you can't. There's no action 0:02:52.040 --> 0:02:58.280 connected with why. There's action connected with what what next? 0:02:58.520 --> 0:03:01.880 What am I going to do? Now? Okay? And that's 0:03:01.919 --> 0:03:05.960 exactly what you're asking. Okay, great, you said what do 0:03:06.040 --> 0:03:09.680 you think I should do? There's no right or wrong answer. 0:03:10.080 --> 0:03:13.920 Let's walk through it though. Okay, Noah, let me recap. 0:03:14.040 --> 0:03:17.880 Dad's been gone two thirds of your life. We see 0:03:17.919 --> 0:03:23.040 this step mom problem. This is not necessarily a step 0:03:23.160 --> 0:03:27.480 mother problem. It's a step parent problem because it could 0:03:27.480 --> 0:03:30.840 be a stepdad as well. But we see the step 0:03:31.040 --> 0:03:35.200 parent problem so many times on the microcosm of what 0:03:35.840 --> 0:03:39.400 the Grangersmith podcast is. In one hundred and seventy five 0:03:39.440 --> 0:03:43.800 episodes and god knows how many questions, Man, we have 0:03:43.880 --> 0:03:50.560 seen the step parent create havoc. And I don't necessarily 0:03:50.600 --> 0:03:56.080 blame that person. This is on your dad. This is 0:03:56.160 --> 0:04:00.560 on your dad. He's in La La Land. And you 0:04:00.600 --> 0:04:03.040 don't want to tell a seventeen year old that his 0:04:03.200 --> 0:04:07.040 dad is in La La Land. But that's what's happening. 0:04:10.080 --> 0:04:13.760 In one more year, you're eligible for the draft, if 0:04:13.840 --> 0:04:18.760 there was a draft, and you should know your Dad 0:04:18.800 --> 0:04:23.320 has gone cuckoo right, He's got love eyes on, and 0:04:23.360 --> 0:04:28.560 he is he's too attached to this woman, this stepmother. 0:04:29.200 --> 0:04:32.760 He's so attached to her that he can't see what's 0:04:32.839 --> 0:04:35.159 really going on, and he can't see the damage that 0:04:35.200 --> 0:04:39.960 it's doing. And dare I say he is? He is 0:04:40.200 --> 0:04:42.640 frightened of her in a way. He has a fear 0:04:42.760 --> 0:04:46.599 of her in a way that's deeper than his fear 0:04:46.640 --> 0:04:49.719 of losing his family. And that is a sad place 0:04:49.800 --> 0:04:58.680 to be. So what do you do? You love him? 0:04:58.800 --> 0:05:05.000 You love him, you forgive him. That's not the answer 0:05:05.040 --> 0:05:08.080 you probably wanted, or maybe maybe not what you expected. 0:05:08.120 --> 0:05:10.440 Maybe after all this build up, you're thinking, Yeah, Dad's 0:05:10.440 --> 0:05:12.719 a jerk. What do I do? Granger? Tell me what 0:05:12.800 --> 0:05:15.719 I What do I do? Do I figure out some 0:05:15.800 --> 0:05:19.840 kind of legal way to win this battle? Brother? The 0:05:20.160 --> 0:05:24.200 way to win this battle is by loving him. And 0:05:24.320 --> 0:05:28.080 you send him a letter, You say, Dad, I miss you. Man. 0:05:30.320 --> 0:05:35.839 The farms and shambles and the family's hurting, Your grandma 0:05:35.960 --> 0:05:40.800 is hurting. None of us blame you. It's just the 0:05:40.800 --> 0:05:44.279 way it is right now. More than anything, we just 0:05:44.400 --> 0:05:49.279 miss you and I love you, Dad. I really wish 0:05:49.360 --> 0:05:52.320 I could see it, miss. I wish maybe we can 0:05:52.440 --> 0:05:54.400 jump on the phone sometime. I just want I want 0:05:54.440 --> 0:05:58.440 you to know Dad that that I forgive you, and 0:05:58.520 --> 0:06:01.680 I hope you forgive me for anything I've done. And 0:06:01.760 --> 0:06:05.200 I would like to meet up sometime and grab a 0:06:05.240 --> 0:06:11.440 burger talk about some stuff. Whenever you're ready. The door's 0:06:11.480 --> 0:06:14.800 opened at Noah, if you could do that, man, that 0:06:15.200 --> 0:06:18.200 takes a man to do that. It takes a mature 0:06:18.240 --> 0:06:21.480 man to do that. Not that you aren't at seventeen, 0:06:21.560 --> 0:06:24.520 not that you're not there yet. Maybe you are, sounds 0:06:24.520 --> 0:06:27.159 like you, maybe you're growing up quick. But if you 0:06:27.160 --> 0:06:30.720 could do that, you'll be a man, my son, You'll 0:06:30.720 --> 0:06:34.440 be a man. That's how a man would deal with this, 0:06:35.320 --> 0:06:37.880 Not with his fist, not with his attitude, Not by 0:06:37.920 --> 0:06:43.040 breaking things and being angry. That's weak. A weak man 0:06:43.080 --> 0:06:45.880 would do that. A weak man would turn his back 0:06:45.920 --> 0:06:50.280 on a cowardly father by acting cowardly back to him 0:06:50.320 --> 0:06:53.920 and becoming that continuing the cycle in his life. It's 0:06:53.960 --> 0:06:56.680 not you, Noah. That's not why you emailed this podcast. 0:06:56.960 --> 0:06:59.000 That's not why a seventeen year old guy like you 0:06:59.240 --> 0:07:03.160 listens to this podcast. I got a feeling about you. 0:07:04.080 --> 0:07:10.960 You're breaking that generational curse. It stops with you, partly, 0:07:11.560 --> 0:07:14.120 partly in the fact that when you find a girl 0:07:14.960 --> 0:07:16.560 and you get married to this girl, you're gonna make 0:07:16.600 --> 0:07:19.800 a commitment to her in that family and you're not 0:07:19.880 --> 0:07:22.400 going anywhere, and you're going to tell your wife's that, 0:07:22.400 --> 0:07:24.520 and you're gonna tell your kids that. You're going to say, 0:07:25.120 --> 0:07:27.200 you know, I learned. I learned some stuff when I 0:07:27.240 --> 0:07:30.559 was growing up about a broken family, a broken home. 0:07:31.840 --> 0:07:35.040 I will not do that to you, guys, And you'll 0:07:35.040 --> 0:07:37.120 look them into the eye and at the dinner table 0:07:37.840 --> 0:07:41.240 you'll say, I will not leave you. Guys. I'm your dad. 0:07:43.160 --> 0:07:48.280 The generational curse stops with me. That's you. Noah, I'm 0:07:48.320 --> 0:07:51.680 speaking this into you, man, I'm speaking some identity into you. 0:07:52.000 --> 0:07:55.360 As you move forward and you handle this situation with grace, 0:07:55.880 --> 0:08:02.320 love and forgiveness, and you tell your great grandma, he said, Grandma, Dad, 0:08:02.480 --> 0:08:05.400 Dad's cuckoo right now, But that's not who he is. 0:08:05.680 --> 0:08:08.640 You know him better than that. He's in La la land. 0:08:08.680 --> 0:08:12.840 But we're hoping that he comes back and we forgive him. Grandma. 0:08:13.440 --> 0:08:17.600 I know it's tough, but we still love him, don't we. Grandma? 0:08:18.120 --> 0:08:21.080 You spread that message around. You. Don't let that deceit 0:08:21.720 --> 0:08:24.280 just find its way in and start breaking this this 0:08:24.560 --> 0:08:27.560 family apart any further because people get together and gossip 0:08:27.640 --> 0:08:30.000 and go get You know about step the step mom. 0:08:30.320 --> 0:08:32.080 You know what she said. You know what she did 0:08:32.120 --> 0:08:34.080 in this email or so and so sorry at the 0:08:34.120 --> 0:08:36.040 bank and the line and the teller's off. You know 0:08:36.080 --> 0:08:38.840 what she did. She just ignored him. And you know 0:08:38.880 --> 0:08:41.200 what else? You know what we heard a rumor about her, 0:08:41.280 --> 0:08:44.440 about her ex husband, the electrician down there. You know, 0:08:44.480 --> 0:08:48.120 this stuff just spreads like cancer. You're not going to 0:08:48.160 --> 0:08:51.000 be part of it. Noah, You're not a part of it. 0:08:53.120 --> 0:08:57.000 I appreciate your emailing brother. I hope you could take 0:08:57.040 --> 0:09:00.000 this with you. I hope you could take it with you. 0:09:04.760 --> 0:09:09.160 Next question moving on here. Subject line says girl. Question 0:09:09.240 --> 0:09:11.800 says how can you tell if the girl you're dating 0:09:11.880 --> 0:09:18.800 is the right one? Question comes from Bentley Bentley common 0:09:19.080 --> 0:09:23.360 question we get on this podcast and I understand, I 0:09:23.440 --> 0:09:25.719 hear you. I hear you loud and clear. How can 0:09:25.760 --> 0:09:31.920 you tell if the girl you're dating is the right one? Yeah, 0:09:32.040 --> 0:09:35.520 because your hands are sweaty and your knees are weak, 0:09:36.520 --> 0:09:42.560 you can't eat, and you can't sleep. Alan Jackson had 0:09:42.600 --> 0:09:46.160 a song back in the I guess the nineties called 0:09:46.679 --> 0:09:48.960 sounds Like Love's Got a hold on You. You just 0:09:49.080 --> 0:09:53.000 know it, brother, you know it. You go man, this girl, 0:09:54.480 --> 0:09:57.280 this girl does something to me. I feel sick. I 0:09:57.320 --> 0:10:02.360 feel physically ill around girl. She turns me every way 0:10:02.400 --> 0:10:06.880 but loose. That's what Alan Jackson said. That's how you know. 0:10:08.840 --> 0:10:15.720 You don't have to ask all right. Next question, subject 0:10:15.760 --> 0:10:20.440 line says fate, Hey, Gringel. My name is Christine. I'm 0:10:20.440 --> 0:10:23.640 thirty one. Live in a small town on the Vermont border. 0:10:24.120 --> 0:10:26.760 I was in a military relationship for the better part 0:10:26.800 --> 0:10:29.320 of three years. We were on and off several times 0:10:29.400 --> 0:10:34.480 during deployments, COVID and relocations. We also talked about getting married, 0:10:34.520 --> 0:10:37.720 having kids, and living happily ever after. We haven't spoken 0:10:37.720 --> 0:10:40.679 in almost two years now, but I think about him 0:10:40.720 --> 0:10:45.280 every day and I even dream about him. Everyone has 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:47.120 told me that I need to move on and allow 0:10:47.240 --> 0:10:50.880 another man into my life. I'm worried that I'll never 0:10:50.920 --> 0:10:56.000 find someone quite like him, but my biological clock is ticking. 0:10:56.600 --> 0:10:59.240 I want nothing more than to raise a family. I'm 0:10:59.280 --> 0:11:02.599 trying to rely on God's plan, but I frequently get discouraged. 0:11:02.960 --> 0:11:07.160 Do you believe anything. Excuse me, you said. You didn't 0:11:07.160 --> 0:11:10.880 say that. You said, do you believe everything happens for 0:11:10.960 --> 0:11:15.800 a reason? Is fate real? And where does God's plan 0:11:15.960 --> 0:11:20.760 fit in? Thank you for everything you do. God bless Christine, Ah, Christine, 0:11:20.800 --> 0:11:25.200 thank you for the email. I'm gonna recap for my 0:11:25.280 --> 0:11:28.360 own brain. You're thirty one and you were in a 0:11:28.400 --> 0:11:31.679 military relationship for the better part of three years on 0:11:31.800 --> 0:11:36.559 and off. So this was okay? You said we even 0:11:36.559 --> 0:11:39.000 talked about getting married having kids, so that didn't didn't happen. 0:11:39.160 --> 0:11:43.040 This is the boyfriend. This is an ex boyfriend that 0:11:43.120 --> 0:11:46.720 you still think about. Got it? Okay, let's start backwards. 0:11:46.760 --> 0:11:48.679 I'm gonna start the back half of this first. I'm 0:11:48.679 --> 0:11:51.040 gonna deal with what I think is more important than 0:11:51.080 --> 0:11:53.960 the ex boyfriend right now, and that is the question 0:11:54.120 --> 0:11:58.960 or you say, do you believe everything happens for a reason? One? 0:11:59.360 --> 0:12:03.480 Is fate real? Two? And three? Where does God's plan 0:12:03.640 --> 0:12:08.920 fit in? I want to challenge you, Christine on that 0:12:09.080 --> 0:12:14.120 last question, Where does God's plan fit in? And I 0:12:14.160 --> 0:12:22.160 would have you flip everything and say God's plan happens 0:12:22.200 --> 0:12:26.199 no matter what. Where does my life fit into that? 0:12:26.840 --> 0:12:31.080 Where does fate fit into that? Where does everything happening 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:35.160 fit into that? Right? So God's purpose, God's plan happens 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:39.000 because he's God and he's sovereign, and that's what the 0:12:39.040 --> 0:12:44.479 Bible tells us, that his plan will stand always and 0:12:44.520 --> 0:12:49.439 it's always good. He even turns evil for good. He 0:12:49.600 --> 0:12:53.600 uses bad for good in a way that we can't 0:12:53.600 --> 0:12:57.240 possibly understand, but we can understand it through our own, 0:12:58.360 --> 0:13:00.280 our own drama that we have in our life. That 0:13:00.280 --> 0:13:02.920 we write a book or we watch a movie. And 0:13:02.960 --> 0:13:05.600 I've talked about this before. You have the antagonist in 0:13:05.600 --> 0:13:08.160 the movie, you take them out, you take the bad 0:13:08.240 --> 0:13:11.600 out of the movie, it's no longer a good movie. Right. 0:13:12.360 --> 0:13:16.880 You can't understand light at all unless you see the dark, right, 0:13:16.960 --> 0:13:19.840 unless you have the dark contrasting it. So we can 0:13:19.920 --> 0:13:24.640 kind of see, maybe in our finite brains, why he 0:13:24.760 --> 0:13:27.960 would allow certain things to happen. But what we do 0:13:28.080 --> 0:13:32.560 know is that he has a plan and it happens 0:13:32.960 --> 0:13:38.640 that way. So the real question is that you're trying 0:13:38.679 --> 0:13:40.880 to ask, I hope, or at least I'm challenging you, 0:13:41.000 --> 0:13:45.000 is where do we fit into that? Where does my 0:13:45.280 --> 0:13:51.640 little tiny life fit into that plan? Okay, I can't 0:13:51.679 --> 0:13:54.160 answer that for you, I could shoot you in the 0:13:54.240 --> 0:13:57.600 right direction. I can't answer that, but if I can 0:13:57.679 --> 0:14:02.600 reframe your thinking to be that, then I think it'll 0:14:02.679 --> 0:14:08.400 really help you to better understand the path that you're on. Okay, 0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:11.839 so let's go now with that idea, with a new 0:14:12.000 --> 0:14:16.720 reframed question. Now, let's talk about the ex boyfriend. Okay, 0:14:17.840 --> 0:14:21.520 it's easy to look back and see that hindsight is 0:14:21.560 --> 0:14:26.480 twenty twenty. It's just a thing. We know this. You say, 0:14:26.560 --> 0:14:28.880 we are on and off several times during the plumb 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:34.600 during deployment's, COVID and relocations. You didn't make it. There's 0:14:34.640 --> 0:14:37.800 a lot of stuff going on right now that could 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:42.960 be a positive thing for you because it was a 0:14:43.040 --> 0:14:45.440 very unstable time in both of y'all's lives, and now 0:14:45.480 --> 0:14:51.840 maybe you're kind of stable now. And so my question 0:14:51.920 --> 0:14:56.800 to you would be this, you ever think about writing 0:14:56.840 --> 0:14:59.640 him an email? I'm sure you still have his email. 0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:02.360 Do you ever think about writing him an email and 0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:13.320 saying this to him? Your words? Okay, Okay, Christine, your words. Hey. 0:15:14.600 --> 0:15:18.960 I know that we are on and off several times, deployments, 0:15:19.000 --> 0:15:23.760 COVID relocations. I know that we talked about even getting married, 0:15:25.600 --> 0:15:28.880 having kids, living happily ever after. I know that we 0:15:28.920 --> 0:15:31.280 haven't spoken in almost two years, and this is awkward 0:15:31.360 --> 0:15:36.080 to say, but I think about you every day. I 0:15:36.160 --> 0:15:40.840 even dream about you. Everyone has told me I need 0:15:40.840 --> 0:15:43.760 to move on and allow another man into my life, 0:15:43.800 --> 0:15:48.440 but I'm just worried that I'll never find someone quite 0:15:48.640 --> 0:15:52.800 like you. I didn't say that. That's not my words. 0:15:52.840 --> 0:15:55.560 That was your email, Christine. You just said it to me. 0:15:56.360 --> 0:15:59.080 You asked me that about him. So what if you 0:15:59.120 --> 0:16:02.119 wrote down your words as we see this every podcast, 0:16:03.200 --> 0:16:06.960 and you put it in an email to him, Because 0:16:07.000 --> 0:16:11.280 guess what happens. There's no more wondering after that. There's 0:16:11.320 --> 0:16:14.600 no more I wonder what God's plan is. I wonder 0:16:14.640 --> 0:16:18.600 where my biological clock is ticking. There's no more wondering. 0:16:19.800 --> 0:16:23.520 He either doesn't reply, or he does, or he says no. 0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:27.760 But at least you'll note you could move on, like 0:16:27.840 --> 0:16:30.880 your friends say, because he's gonna ghost you, or he's 0:16:30.920 --> 0:16:35.760 gonna say, hey, I'm married now, I'm engaged now, or 0:16:35.800 --> 0:16:39.400 he's gonna say I feel the same way. Where could 0:16:39.440 --> 0:16:51.680 we meet? Either way, you will know. Okay, let's jump 0:16:51.720 --> 0:16:54.160 into something else here. This looks like a completely different 0:16:54.160 --> 0:16:58.400 subject subject line here says is astrology a sin? They 0:16:58.400 --> 0:17:01.480 grant drummer Rebecca, reaching out for from southern Illinois. I've 0:17:01.480 --> 0:17:03.520 been curious about a topic that's been eating at me 0:17:03.560 --> 0:17:08.479 for a while now. Is astrology a sin? God not 0:17:08.520 --> 0:17:11.879 only created the stars, but he arranged them in star 0:17:12.000 --> 0:17:15.560 groupings that could be used for signs and for seasons. 0:17:16.000 --> 0:17:18.920 Many say astrology is a sin, but I've also heard 0:17:18.920 --> 0:17:22.439 the Gospel in the is in the stars. What are 0:17:22.480 --> 0:17:26.640 your thoughts on God and astrology? Is it a sin? Okay? Rebecca, 0:17:26.680 --> 0:17:30.719 thanks for the for the email you This is this 0:17:30.760 --> 0:17:33.320 is where I wish we were in a conversation together 0:17:33.359 --> 0:17:36.920 around a campfire, because you say, many say astrology is 0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:39.560 a sin, but I've also heard the Gospel is in 0:17:39.600 --> 0:17:43.480 the stars. I don't know what that means. You say 0:17:43.520 --> 0:17:48.920 the Gospel is in the stars. That's that's not true. 0:17:49.240 --> 0:17:54.199 That's not true at all. The Gospels not in the stars. Okay. 0:17:55.160 --> 0:17:59.119 The Gospel is the good news about God coming to 0:17:59.280 --> 0:18:08.520 earth as Jesus, fully, man fully God, taking on the 0:18:08.560 --> 0:18:14.000 sins of his people, redeeming his people. It's the redemption 0:18:14.160 --> 0:18:18.000 story of Israel, and He is the climax of that story. 0:18:18.400 --> 0:18:21.640 When he is killed on the cross, resurrected in three days, 0:18:22.720 --> 0:18:26.520 and he says that anyone who repents and turns to 0:18:26.600 --> 0:18:32.520 him will have everlasting life. During the time on the cross, 0:18:33.040 --> 0:18:36.159 he atoned for the sin. He paid for the price 0:18:36.440 --> 0:18:40.160 of the sins of his people in full. That is 0:18:40.320 --> 0:18:44.840 the gospel, that is the good News. There are gospels 0:18:45.400 --> 0:18:50.640 that we have four copies of from four different apostles. 0:18:51.160 --> 0:18:54.760 We have those as gospels. And then there's also the 0:18:54.800 --> 0:18:59.800 gospel that all of the gospels proclaim. It's the proc 0:19:00.480 --> 0:19:04.359 of good news. Is gospel, and that is not in 0:19:04.400 --> 0:19:10.080 the stars. Okay, Now, did he create the stars and 0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:14.320 arrange them and name them? Yes, the Bible says that 0:19:14.400 --> 0:19:16.200 he knows all the stars. He made all the stars, 0:19:16.200 --> 0:19:21.880 He named all the stars. Did he arrange them for 0:19:22.080 --> 0:19:29.159 signs and seasons in a way that he arranged the 0:19:29.240 --> 0:19:33.159 trees for signs and seasons. We could look at a 0:19:34.440 --> 0:19:38.159 red oak tree and know when the buds are coming, 0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:41.119 that spring is coming. In fact, a mesquite tree in Texas. 0:19:41.160 --> 0:19:43.480 When we know the mesquite tree buds, my grandpa used 0:19:43.480 --> 0:19:47.600 to say this, when the mosquite tree starts budding, you 0:19:47.680 --> 0:19:50.919 know you could put out your garden because a mesquite 0:19:50.960 --> 0:19:55.320 tree will only bud after the last frost. That becomes 0:19:55.359 --> 0:19:57.840 a sign for us on earth as we take dominion 0:19:57.880 --> 0:20:00.440 of this earth. We could look to different things as 0:20:00.480 --> 0:20:07.560 a sign of earthly things, not heavenly things. So we 0:20:07.600 --> 0:20:10.600 could look at a tree and know that the last 0:20:10.640 --> 0:20:12.439 frost is over, and we could put out a garden. 0:20:12.680 --> 0:20:14.840 But we can't look at a tree and say God 0:20:14.880 --> 0:20:19.800 is coming in three months because of the tree is 0:20:19.840 --> 0:20:23.200 giving me the sign. The same way, you can't look 0:20:23.200 --> 0:20:27.520 at the stars and see any kind of heavenly messages 0:20:28.000 --> 0:20:33.120 at all. That would be a terrible heresy, a terrible heresy. 0:20:33.720 --> 0:20:35.320 But you could look at the stars all day and 0:20:35.400 --> 0:20:37.800 go look look at how they make shapes and they 0:20:39.080 --> 0:20:42.520 make creatures. And look at that one looks like an alligator. Wow, 0:20:42.600 --> 0:20:46.239 that one is moving. It's a shooting star. Look how 0:20:46.280 --> 0:20:49.680 beautiful they are. Look how small we are. Look how 0:20:50.560 --> 0:20:54.080 depth the great depth of the galaxy is. You could 0:20:54.280 --> 0:20:57.160 say all that, But as soon as you start saying 0:20:57.160 --> 0:21:03.159 they're arranged in signs and messages for me from God, 0:21:03.520 --> 0:21:07.400 it gets very dangerous. Let's take a break, be right back. 0:21:12.720 --> 0:21:14.640 Thanks for listening to the podcast. You know a great 0:21:14.640 --> 0:21:16.760 way to get a hold of me, or to send 0:21:16.800 --> 0:21:18.840 me a message, or to have me send you a 0:21:18.920 --> 0:21:24.119 message is a cameo. Cameo dot com slash Granger Smith 0:21:24.240 --> 0:21:26.840 or you can download the cameo app and search for 0:21:26.920 --> 0:21:30.040 me Granger Smith. It's a super easy format and I've 0:21:30.040 --> 0:21:32.840 done cameo for about three and a half years now 0:21:33.440 --> 0:21:35.560 and it's just part of my daily life. I love 0:21:35.640 --> 0:21:37.600 doing it and I love being able to communicate. What 0:21:37.640 --> 0:21:41.320 it is is you send me a message and I 0:21:41.520 --> 0:21:44.520 record you back a video message of whatever you want 0:21:44.520 --> 0:21:46.840 me to say. It could be happy birthday, happy anniversary, 0:21:47.080 --> 0:21:52.960 words of encouragement, happy engagement, announcing babies. I've done pretty 0:21:53.000 --> 0:21:57.080 much everything right now is a good time for Valentine's Day. 0:21:57.720 --> 0:22:00.400 You need that last minute gift, you need to say 0:22:00.440 --> 0:22:03.879 something the last minute for your Valentine. I got you covered. 0:22:04.280 --> 0:22:07.520 Just go to cameo dot com slash Granger Smith send 0:22:07.520 --> 0:22:09.880 me your request for whoever you want me to send 0:22:09.880 --> 0:22:12.520 it to. Also, this is a big week for ye 0:22:12.640 --> 0:22:16.880 Ye Apparel coming up this Friday the seventeenth. Are all 0:22:17.000 --> 0:22:21.440 new twenty twenty three winter launch. So excited about this. 0:22:21.480 --> 0:22:23.520 We have so many really cool items. You could find 0:22:23.520 --> 0:22:26.639 out more at ye ye dot com. Make sure you 0:22:26.680 --> 0:22:30.040 get there about ten am Central. Because you wait too long, 0:22:30.240 --> 0:22:33.160 your favorite sizes will start being sold out. You don't 0:22:33.160 --> 0:22:35.480 want that to happen, so go to yeye dot com 0:22:35.800 --> 0:22:38.600 right now to get your preview. You could also follow 0:22:38.720 --> 0:22:42.000 yee Ye Apparel on Instagram or follow me on Instagram 0:22:42.000 --> 0:22:50.280 at granger Smith. Back to the podcast, All right, back 0:22:50.320 --> 0:22:51.960 to the podcast. If you have a question for me, 0:22:52.040 --> 0:22:55.679 email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Could be about 0:22:55.720 --> 0:22:58.000 any subject. My only thing is please don't send the 0:22:58.000 --> 0:23:02.480 same one twice because gets lost or trashed. And don't 0:23:03.000 --> 0:23:05.760 send me one that's much longer than like a phone length, 0:23:06.200 --> 0:23:08.639 because then it makes it difficult to read that question 0:23:08.720 --> 0:23:11.760 on the podcast. Okay, let's get back into this subject line. 0:23:11.880 --> 0:23:15.200 If this one says girlfriends past, grant your. My name 0:23:15.240 --> 0:23:18.679 is Kyle. I'm twenty two. I'm madly in love with 0:23:18.800 --> 0:23:22.160 my girlfriend of six months, and she feels the same 0:23:22.200 --> 0:23:26.560 about me. She's amazing in every way, and we've already 0:23:26.560 --> 0:23:30.880 talked about marriage. I love everything about her other than 0:23:31.000 --> 0:23:37.199 her past. She's had multiple previous boyfriends before me, and 0:23:37.320 --> 0:23:40.320 I just cannot seem to get the thought out of 0:23:40.320 --> 0:23:43.000 my head that she's been with them and has had 0:23:43.119 --> 0:23:47.840 sex with guys other than me. I just cannot get 0:23:47.880 --> 0:23:50.520 the mental images out of my head. I just don't 0:23:50.560 --> 0:23:53.080 know if it's jealousy or what it is. But I 0:23:53.119 --> 0:23:58.760 don't know how to go through this. What are your thoughts? Thinks? 0:24:00.040 --> 0:24:02.199 I'm sorry that last sentence you said, but I know 0:24:02.520 --> 0:24:06.679 I'm not the only one going through this. What are 0:24:06.680 --> 0:24:11.240 your thoughts? Things? Okay, Kyle, appreciate you, bro, thank you 0:24:11.280 --> 0:24:15.040 for emailing. Twenty two years old, madly in love girlfriend 0:24:15.119 --> 0:24:19.040 six months she feels the same, amazing every way not 0:24:19.160 --> 0:24:27.479 quite right, and you've talked about marriage. Cool. Yeah, I 0:24:27.520 --> 0:24:32.560 hear you. I'm hearing you here, and this is what 0:24:32.600 --> 0:24:34.719 we're going to talk about, Kyle. So me and you 0:24:35.160 --> 0:24:37.520 road tripping, right, this is a great road trip question. 0:24:38.359 --> 0:24:41.879 Driving down the highway, me and you and you're like, man, Granger, 0:24:41.920 --> 0:24:45.080 I gotta I'm like, hey, how's the girl? Right? How's 0:24:45.119 --> 0:24:49.480 the girl? And you go, man, it's great, everything's great. 0:24:50.200 --> 0:24:52.280 And you know, I really love madly in love with 0:24:52.359 --> 0:24:58.480 her and I'm like, but but man, I can't. I 0:24:58.480 --> 0:25:05.880 can't get over her past boyfriends always think about it 0:25:05.920 --> 0:25:08.280 makes me sneeze. I just think about this, Kyle makes 0:25:08.280 --> 0:25:15.520 me sneeze. Excuse me. This is something that you're gonna 0:25:15.560 --> 0:25:17.720 have to look at who she is now? This is 0:25:17.760 --> 0:25:21.240 what this is, what's gonna play into this, this this answer. 0:25:22.000 --> 0:25:25.359 So much of what I need you to do now 0:25:25.560 --> 0:25:30.479 is look at who she is now today? Who is 0:25:30.520 --> 0:25:33.040 she today? Kyle? That's what I tell you in the 0:25:33.040 --> 0:25:35.440 cab of the truck. You're not gonna look at her 0:25:36.880 --> 0:25:39.840 and who she was with past boyfriends. I know that 0:25:39.840 --> 0:25:42.640 that's difficult to do, but this is an exercise you're 0:25:42.640 --> 0:25:45.600 gonna have to force yourself in because trust trust me, 0:25:46.400 --> 0:25:50.440 no one wants to look at your past either. Kyle. 0:25:50.480 --> 0:25:54.359 What you know about her past? And you know about 0:25:54.359 --> 0:25:57.520 these ex boyfriends because she's opened up and told you, 0:25:58.840 --> 0:26:03.080 But there's stuff she doesn't know about you. What has 0:26:03.080 --> 0:26:06.280 happened in your past? What are things that have happened 0:26:07.320 --> 0:26:11.680 that no one knows about? And what if everything you've 0:26:11.680 --> 0:26:15.679 done in your life was put on a tape that 0:26:15.800 --> 0:26:19.040 sounds so old tape digit is put on a digital 0:26:19.080 --> 0:26:22.920 file and we all got to watch it, Kyle, we 0:26:22.960 --> 0:26:28.080 get to see your whole life on one click. How 0:26:28.080 --> 0:26:32.000 would you feel there's stuff you're ashamed of? There's stuff 0:26:32.000 --> 0:26:36.399 that you wish that no one could see. Hm. I 0:26:36.440 --> 0:26:38.399 would say yes. It would be very strange if you 0:26:38.440 --> 0:26:40.960 said no, because you're a human. I'm not blaming you. 0:26:41.040 --> 0:26:44.879 I'm saying me. You everyone, there's stuff and we just 0:26:44.960 --> 0:26:48.240 don't want people to know in our past. But that's 0:26:48.240 --> 0:26:51.080