1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:03,680 Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, brother, I'm so sorry that you are 2 00:00:04,360 --> 00:00:08,440 Speaker 1: in this. This is not the card that you wanted 3 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:23,560 Speaker 1: to play, but it's the card you were dealt. What's up, everybody, 4 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,680 Speaker 1: Welcome to the podcast. Thank you for watching and listening 5 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:29,240 Speaker 1: wherever you're coming from. What I do here is I 6 00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:32,920 Speaker 1: answer your questions, super easy, super casual. You email me 7 00:00:33,479 --> 00:00:37,199 Speaker 1: Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com. We walk through them 8 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:39,400 Speaker 1: just like we're on a road trip together. I'm going 9 00:00:39,440 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 1: to answer like a friend, and I have no notes, 10 00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:45,840 Speaker 1: no quotes, nothing prepared in front of me. In fact, 11 00:00:46,159 --> 00:00:49,320 Speaker 1: I haven't even read any of these questions ready to 12 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:52,360 Speaker 1: go here at all, totally random. I have no idea 13 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:55,000 Speaker 1: what I'm getting into. They're straight from you, guys, and 14 00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:58,520 Speaker 1: this is episode one seventy five. Let's get started here. 15 00:00:59,440 --> 00:01:04,280 Speaker 1: First question, no subject line. It says, hey, granger my 16 00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:07,040 Speaker 1: name is Noah. I have a question about my family. 17 00:01:07,120 --> 00:01:09,880 Speaker 1: My parents got divorced when I was about five years old. 18 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:13,080 Speaker 1: I'm now seventeen, and for the past three years, my 19 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:16,720 Speaker 1: father has not spoken to me. I haven't seen him 20 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:19,319 Speaker 1: in a year. All of this because my stepmom caused 21 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:22,440 Speaker 1: a series of events that created a disaster for our family, 22 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:25,800 Speaker 1: a family all of us thought could never be broken. 23 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:28,319 Speaker 1: My father has turned his back on me and my 24 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:31,240 Speaker 1: brother and his grandma who raised him, and our cousins. 25 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:34,760 Speaker 1: The family and the farm is in shambles lately. I 26 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:38,360 Speaker 1: really miss my father. I guess what I'm asking is 27 00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:43,440 Speaker 1: what do you think I should do? Wow? Yeah, Noah? 28 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:49,960 Speaker 1: Thank you for kicking off the podcast with a a 29 00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:55,040 Speaker 1: very deep question. And I'm so sorry brother, I'm so 30 00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:58,560 Speaker 1: sorry that you are in this. This is not the 31 00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:03,120 Speaker 1: card that you wanted to play, but it's the card 32 00:02:03,120 --> 00:02:06,760 Speaker 1: you were dealt, right, And that's that's what we could 33 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:11,079 Speaker 1: all say about ourselves. We don't always enjoy what we're 34 00:02:11,120 --> 00:02:14,400 Speaker 1: doing or say that this is where we thought we 35 00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:17,200 Speaker 1: would be, or this is what we would choose to be, 36 00:02:18,320 --> 00:02:21,160 Speaker 1: as far from that. Life is so much more just 37 00:02:21,200 --> 00:02:24,040 Speaker 1: about the hand that we're dealt. How do we play it? 38 00:02:25,919 --> 00:02:29,280 Speaker 1: How do we play the hand that we're dealt without 39 00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:32,480 Speaker 1: looking around and saying, man, that family over there across 40 00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:35,440 Speaker 1: the street, they're doing pretty good. Why do I get 41 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:41,320 Speaker 1: this hand? Instead of asking why, change it to what 42 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:43,200 Speaker 1: what am I going to do with this? What am 43 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:45,080 Speaker 1: I going to do with the hand I'm dealt? How 44 00:02:45,080 --> 00:02:48,720 Speaker 1: am I going to play this? Instead of why you can't? 45 00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:51,880 Speaker 1: You can't respond to why you can't. There's no action 46 00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:58,280 Speaker 1: connected with why. There's action connected with what what next? 47 00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:01,880 Speaker 1: What am I going to do? Now? Okay? And that's 48 00:03:01,919 --> 00:03:05,960 Speaker 1: exactly what you're asking. Okay, great, you said what do 49 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:09,680 Speaker 1: you think I should do? There's no right or wrong answer. 50 00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:13,920 Speaker 1: Let's walk through it though. Okay, Noah, let me recap. 51 00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:17,880 Speaker 1: Dad's been gone two thirds of your life. We see 52 00:03:17,919 --> 00:03:23,040 Speaker 1: this step mom problem. This is not necessarily a step 53 00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:27,480 Speaker 1: mother problem. It's a step parent problem because it could 54 00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:30,840 Speaker 1: be a stepdad as well. But we see the step 55 00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:35,200 Speaker 1: parent problem so many times on the microcosm of what 56 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:39,400 Speaker 1: the Grangersmith podcast is. In one hundred and seventy five 57 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:43,800 Speaker 1: episodes and god knows how many questions, Man, we have 58 00:03:43,880 --> 00:03:50,560 Speaker 1: seen the step parent create havoc. And I don't necessarily 59 00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:56,080 Speaker 1: blame that person. This is on your dad. This is 60 00:03:56,160 --> 00:04:00,560 Speaker 1: on your dad. He's in La La Land. And you 61 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:03,040 Speaker 1: don't want to tell a seventeen year old that his 62 00:04:03,200 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 1: dad is in La La Land. But that's what's happening. 63 00:04:10,080 --> 00:04:13,760 Speaker 1: In one more year, you're eligible for the draft, if 64 00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:18,760 Speaker 1: there was a draft, and you should know your Dad 65 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:23,320 Speaker 1: has gone cuckoo right, He's got love eyes on, and 66 00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:28,560 Speaker 1: he is he's too attached to this woman, this stepmother. 67 00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:32,760 Speaker 1: He's so attached to her that he can't see what's 68 00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:35,159 Speaker 1: really going on, and he can't see the damage that 69 00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:39,960 Speaker 1: it's doing. And dare I say he is? He is 70 00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:42,640 Speaker 1: frightened of her in a way. He has a fear 71 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:46,599 Speaker 1: of her in a way that's deeper than his fear 72 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:49,719 Speaker 1: of losing his family. And that is a sad place 73 00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:58,680 Speaker 1: to be. So what do you do? You love him? 74 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:05,000 Speaker 1: You love him, you forgive him. That's not the answer 75 00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:08,080 Speaker 1: you probably wanted, or maybe maybe not what you expected. 76 00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:10,440 Speaker 1: Maybe after all this build up, you're thinking, Yeah, Dad's 77 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:12,719 Speaker 1: a jerk. What do I do? Granger? Tell me what 78 00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:15,719 Speaker 1: I What do I do? Do I figure out some 79 00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:19,840 Speaker 1: kind of legal way to win this battle? Brother? The 80 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 1: way to win this battle is by loving him. And 81 00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:28,080 Speaker 1: you send him a letter, You say, Dad, I miss you. Man. 82 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:35,839 Speaker 1: The farms and shambles and the family's hurting, Your grandma 83 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:40,800 Speaker 1: is hurting. None of us blame you. It's just the 84 00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:44,279 Speaker 1: way it is right now. More than anything, we just 85 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:49,279 Speaker 1: miss you and I love you, Dad. I really wish 86 00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:52,320 Speaker 1: I could see it, miss. I wish maybe we can 87 00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:54,400 Speaker 1: jump on the phone sometime. I just want I want 88 00:05:54,440 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 1: you to know Dad that that I forgive you, and 89 00:05:58,520 --> 00:06:01,680 Speaker 1: I hope you forgive me for anything I've done. And 90 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:05,200 Speaker 1: I would like to meet up sometime and grab a 91 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:11,440 Speaker 1: burger talk about some stuff. Whenever you're ready. The door's 92 00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:14,800 Speaker 1: opened at Noah, if you could do that, man, that 93 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:18,200 Speaker 1: takes a man to do that. It takes a mature 94 00:06:18,240 --> 00:06:21,480 Speaker 1: man to do that. Not that you aren't at seventeen, 95 00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:24,520 Speaker 1: not that you're not there yet. Maybe you are, sounds 96 00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:27,159 Speaker 1: like you, maybe you're growing up quick. But if you 97 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:30,720 Speaker 1: could do that, you'll be a man, my son, You'll 98 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:34,440 Speaker 1: be a man. That's how a man would deal with this, 99 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:37,880 Speaker 1: Not with his fist, not with his attitude, Not by 100 00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:43,040 Speaker 1: breaking things and being angry. That's weak. A weak man 101 00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:45,880 Speaker 1: would do that. A weak man would turn his back 102 00:06:45,920 --> 00:06:50,280 Speaker 1: on a cowardly father by acting cowardly back to him 103 00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:53,920 Speaker 1: and becoming that continuing the cycle in his life. It's 104 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,680 Speaker 1: not you, Noah. That's not why you emailed this podcast. 105 00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:59,000 Speaker 1: That's not why a seventeen year old guy like you 106 00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:03,160 Speaker 1: listens to this podcast. I got a feeling about you. 107 00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:10,960 Speaker 1: You're breaking that generational curse. It stops with you, partly, 108 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:14,120 Speaker 1: partly in the fact that when you find a girl 109 00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:16,560 Speaker 1: and you get married to this girl, you're gonna make 110 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:19,800 Speaker 1: a commitment to her in that family and you're not 111 00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:22,400 Speaker 1: going anywhere, and you're going to tell your wife's that, 112 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,520 Speaker 1: and you're gonna tell your kids that. You're going to say, 113 00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:27,200 Speaker 1: you know, I learned. I learned some stuff when I 114 00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:30,559 Speaker 1: was growing up about a broken family, a broken home. 115 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:35,040 Speaker 1: I will not do that to you, guys, And you'll 116 00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:37,120 Speaker 1: look them into the eye and at the dinner table 117 00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:41,240 Speaker 1: you'll say, I will not leave you. Guys. I'm your dad. 118 00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:48,280 Speaker 1: The generational curse stops with me. That's you. Noah, I'm 119 00:07:48,320 --> 00:07:51,680 Speaker 1: speaking this into you, man, I'm speaking some identity into you. 120 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:55,360 Speaker 1: As you move forward and you handle this situation with grace, 121 00:07:55,880 --> 00:08:02,320 Speaker 1: love and forgiveness, and you tell your great grandma, he said, Grandma, Dad, 122 00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:05,400 Speaker 1: Dad's cuckoo right now, But that's not who he is. 123 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: You know him better than that. He's in La la land. 124 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:12,840 Speaker 1: But we're hoping that he comes back and we forgive him. Grandma. 125 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:17,600 Speaker 1: I know it's tough, but we still love him, don't we. Grandma? 126 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:21,080 Speaker 1: You spread that message around. You. Don't let that deceit 127 00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:24,280 Speaker 1: just find its way in and start breaking this this 128 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:27,560 Speaker 1: family apart any further because people get together and gossip 129 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:30,000 Speaker 1: and go get You know about step the step mom. 130 00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:32,080 Speaker 1: You know what she said. You know what she did 131 00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:34,080 Speaker 1: in this email or so and so sorry at the 132 00:08:34,120 --> 00:08:36,040 Speaker 1: bank and the line and the teller's off. You know 133 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:38,840 Speaker 1: what she did. She just ignored him. And you know 134 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:41,200 Speaker 1: what else? You know what we heard a rumor about her, 135 00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:44,440 Speaker 1: about her ex husband, the electrician down there. You know, 136 00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:48,120 Speaker 1: this stuff just spreads like cancer. You're not going to 137 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:51,000 Speaker 1: be part of it. Noah, You're not a part of it. 138 00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:57,000 Speaker 1: I appreciate your emailing brother. I hope you could take 139 00:08:57,040 --> 00:09:00,000 Speaker 1: this with you. I hope you could take it with you. 140 00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:09,160 Speaker 1: Next question moving on here. Subject line says girl. Question 141 00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:11,800 Speaker 1: says how can you tell if the girl you're dating 142 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:18,800 Speaker 1: is the right one? Question comes from Bentley Bentley common 143 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:23,360 Speaker 1: question we get on this podcast and I understand, I 144 00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:25,719 Speaker 1: hear you. I hear you loud and clear. How can 145 00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:31,920 Speaker 1: you tell if the girl you're dating is the right one? Yeah, 146 00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:35,520 Speaker 1: because your hands are sweaty and your knees are weak, 147 00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:42,560 Speaker 1: you can't eat, and you can't sleep. Alan Jackson had 148 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:46,160 Speaker 1: a song back in the I guess the nineties called 149 00:09:46,679 --> 00:09:48,960 Speaker 1: sounds Like Love's Got a hold on You. You just 150 00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:53,000 Speaker 1: know it, brother, you know it. You go man, this girl, 151 00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:57,280 Speaker 1: this girl does something to me. I feel sick. I 152 00:09:57,320 --> 00:10:02,360 Speaker 1: feel physically ill around girl. She turns me every way 153 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:06,880 Speaker 1: but loose. That's what Alan Jackson said. That's how you know. 154 00:10:08,840 --> 00:10:15,720 Speaker 1: You don't have to ask all right. Next question, subject 155 00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:20,440 Speaker 1: line says fate, Hey, Gringel. My name is Christine. I'm 156 00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:23,640 Speaker 1: thirty one. Live in a small town on the Vermont border. 157 00:10:24,120 --> 00:10:26,760 Speaker 1: I was in a military relationship for the better part 158 00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:29,320 Speaker 1: of three years. We were on and off several times 159 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:34,480 Speaker 1: during deployments, COVID and relocations. We also talked about getting married, 160 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,720 Speaker 1: having kids, and living happily ever after. We haven't spoken 161 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:40,679 Speaker 1: in almost two years now, but I think about him 162 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:45,280 Speaker 1: every day and I even dream about him. Everyone has 163 00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:47,120 Speaker 1: told me that I need to move on and allow 164 00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:50,880 Speaker 1: another man into my life. I'm worried that I'll never 165 00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:56,000 Speaker 1: find someone quite like him, but my biological clock is ticking. 166 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:59,240 Speaker 1: I want nothing more than to raise a family. I'm 167 00:10:59,280 --> 00:11:02,599 Speaker 1: trying to rely on God's plan, but I frequently get discouraged. 168 00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:07,160 Speaker 1: Do you believe anything. Excuse me, you said. You didn't 169 00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:10,880 Speaker 1: say that. You said, do you believe everything happens for 170 00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:15,800 Speaker 1: a reason? Is fate real? And where does God's plan 171 00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:20,760 Speaker 1: fit in? Thank you for everything you do. God bless Christine, Ah, Christine, 172 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:25,200 Speaker 1: thank you for the email. I'm gonna recap for my 173 00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:28,360 Speaker 1: own brain. You're thirty one and you were in a 174 00:11:28,400 --> 00:11:31,679 Speaker 1: military relationship for the better part of three years on 175 00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:36,559 Speaker 1: and off. So this was okay? You said we even 176 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:39,000 Speaker 1: talked about getting married having kids, so that didn't didn't happen. 177 00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:43,040 Speaker 1: This is the boyfriend. This is an ex boyfriend that 178 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:46,720 Speaker 1: you still think about. Got it? Okay, let's start backwards. 179 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:48,679 Speaker 1: I'm gonna start the back half of this first. I'm 180 00:11:48,679 --> 00:11:51,040 Speaker 1: gonna deal with what I think is more important than 181 00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:53,960 Speaker 1: the ex boyfriend right now, and that is the question 182 00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:58,960 Speaker 1: or you say, do you believe everything happens for a reason? One? 183 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:03,480 Speaker 1: Is fate real? Two? And three? Where does God's plan 184 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:08,920 Speaker 1: fit in? I want to challenge you, Christine on that 185 00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:14,120 Speaker 1: last question, Where does God's plan fit in? And I 186 00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:22,160 Speaker 1: would have you flip everything and say God's plan happens 187 00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:26,199 Speaker 1: no matter what. Where does my life fit into that? 188 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:31,080 Speaker 1: Where does fate fit into that? Where does everything happening 189 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:35,160 Speaker 1: fit into that? Right? So God's purpose, God's plan happens 190 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:39,000 Speaker 1: because he's God and he's sovereign, and that's what the 191 00:12:39,040 --> 00:12:44,479 Speaker 1: Bible tells us, that his plan will stand always and 192 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:49,439 Speaker 1: it's always good. He even turns evil for good. He 193 00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:53,600 Speaker 1: uses bad for good in a way that we can't 194 00:12:53,600 --> 00:12:57,240 Speaker 1: possibly understand, but we can understand it through our own, 195 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,280 Speaker 1: our own drama that we have in our life. That 196 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,920 Speaker 1: we write a book or we watch a movie. And 197 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,600 Speaker 1: I've talked about this before. You have the antagonist in 198 00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 1: the movie, you take them out, you take the bad 199 00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:11,600 Speaker 1: out of the movie, it's no longer a good movie. Right. 200 00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:16,880 Speaker 1: You can't understand light at all unless you see the dark, right, 201 00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:19,840 Speaker 1: unless you have the dark contrasting it. So we can 202 00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:24,640 Speaker 1: kind of see, maybe in our finite brains, why he 203 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:27,960 Speaker 1: would allow certain things to happen. But what we do 204 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:32,560 Speaker 1: know is that he has a plan and it happens 205 00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:38,640 Speaker 1: that way. So the real question is that you're trying 206 00:13:38,679 --> 00:13:40,880 Speaker 1: to ask, I hope, or at least I'm challenging you, 207 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:45,000 Speaker 1: is where do we fit into that? Where does my 208 00:13:45,280 --> 00:13:51,640 Speaker 1: little tiny life fit into that plan? Okay, I can't 209 00:13:51,679 --> 00:13:54,160 Speaker 1: answer that for you, I could shoot you in the 210 00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:57,600 Speaker 1: right direction. I can't answer that, but if I can 211 00:13:57,679 --> 00:14:02,600 Speaker 1: reframe your thinking to be that, then I think it'll 212 00:14:02,679 --> 00:14:08,400 Speaker 1: really help you to better understand the path that you're on. Okay, 213 00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,839 Speaker 1: so let's go now with that idea, with a new 214 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:16,720 Speaker 1: reframed question. Now, let's talk about the ex boyfriend. Okay, 215 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:21,520 Speaker 1: it's easy to look back and see that hindsight is 216 00:14:21,560 --> 00:14:26,480 Speaker 1: twenty twenty. It's just a thing. We know this. You say, 217 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:28,880 Speaker 1: we are on and off several times during the plumb 218 00:14:29,480 --> 00:14:34,600 Speaker 1: during deployment's, COVID and relocations. You didn't make it. There's 219 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:37,800 Speaker 1: a lot of stuff going on right now that could 220 00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:42,960 Speaker 1: be a positive thing for you because it was a 221 00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,440 Speaker 1: very unstable time in both of y'all's lives, and now 222 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:51,840 Speaker 1: maybe you're kind of stable now. And so my question 223 00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:56,800 Speaker 1: to you would be this, you ever think about writing 224 00:14:56,840 --> 00:14:59,640 Speaker 1: him an email? I'm sure you still have his email. 225 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:02,360 Speaker 1: Do you ever think about writing him an email and 226 00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:13,320 Speaker 1: saying this to him? Your words? Okay, Okay, Christine, your words. Hey. 227 00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:18,960 Speaker 1: I know that we are on and off several times, deployments, 228 00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:23,760 Speaker 1: COVID relocations. I know that we talked about even getting married, 229 00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,880 Speaker 1: having kids, living happily ever after. I know that we 230 00:15:28,920 --> 00:15:31,280 Speaker 1: haven't spoken in almost two years, and this is awkward 231 00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:36,080 Speaker 1: to say, but I think about you every day. I 232 00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:40,840 Speaker 1: even dream about you. Everyone has told me I need 233 00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:43,760 Speaker 1: to move on and allow another man into my life, 234 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:48,440 Speaker 1: but I'm just worried that I'll never find someone quite 235 00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:52,800 Speaker 1: like you. I didn't say that. That's not my words. 236 00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:55,560 Speaker 1: That was your email, Christine. You just said it to me. 237 00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:59,080 Speaker 1: You asked me that about him. So what if you 238 00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:02,119 Speaker 1: wrote down your words as we see this every podcast, 239 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 1: and you put it in an email to him, Because 240 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:11,280 Speaker 1: guess what happens. There's no more wondering after that. There's 241 00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:14,600 Speaker 1: no more I wonder what God's plan is. I wonder 242 00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:18,600 Speaker 1: where my biological clock is ticking. There's no more wondering. 243 00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:23,520 Speaker 1: He either doesn't reply, or he does, or he says no. 244 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,760 Speaker 1: But at least you'll note you could move on, like 245 00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:30,880 Speaker 1: your friends say, because he's gonna ghost you, or he's 246 00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:35,760 Speaker 1: gonna say, hey, I'm married now, I'm engaged now, or 247 00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:39,400 Speaker 1: he's gonna say I feel the same way. Where could 248 00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:51,680 Speaker 1: we meet? Either way, you will know. Okay, let's jump 249 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:54,160 Speaker 1: into something else here. This looks like a completely different 250 00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:58,400 Speaker 1: subject subject line here says is astrology a sin? They 251 00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:01,480 Speaker 1: grant drummer Rebecca, reaching out for from southern Illinois. I've 252 00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:03,520 Speaker 1: been curious about a topic that's been eating at me 253 00:17:03,560 --> 00:17:08,479 Speaker 1: for a while now. Is astrology a sin? God not 254 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:11,879 Speaker 1: only created the stars, but he arranged them in star 255 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:15,560 Speaker 1: groupings that could be used for signs and for seasons. 256 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:18,920 Speaker 1: Many say astrology is a sin, but I've also heard 257 00:17:18,920 --> 00:17:22,439 Speaker 1: the Gospel in the is in the stars. What are 258 00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:26,640 Speaker 1: your thoughts on God and astrology? Is it a sin? Okay? Rebecca, 259 00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:30,719 Speaker 1: thanks for the for the email you This is this 260 00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:33,320 Speaker 1: is where I wish we were in a conversation together 261 00:17:33,359 --> 00:17:36,920 Speaker 1: around a campfire, because you say, many say astrology is 262 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:39,560 Speaker 1: a sin, but I've also heard the Gospel is in 263 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:43,480 Speaker 1: the stars. I don't know what that means. You say 264 00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:48,920 Speaker 1: the Gospel is in the stars. That's that's not true. 265 00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:54,199 Speaker 1: That's not true at all. The Gospels not in the stars. Okay. 266 00:17:55,160 --> 00:17:59,119 Speaker 1: The Gospel is the good news about God coming to 267 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:08,520 Speaker 1: earth as Jesus, fully, man fully God, taking on the 268 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:14,000 Speaker 1: sins of his people, redeeming his people. It's the redemption 269 00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:18,000 Speaker 1: story of Israel, and He is the climax of that story. 270 00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:21,640 Speaker 1: When he is killed on the cross, resurrected in three days, 271 00:18:22,720 --> 00:18:26,520 Speaker 1: and he says that anyone who repents and turns to 272 00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:32,520 Speaker 1: him will have everlasting life. During the time on the cross, 273 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:36,159 Speaker 1: he atoned for the sin. He paid for the price 274 00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:40,160 Speaker 1: of the sins of his people in full. That is 275 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:44,840 Speaker 1: the gospel, that is the good News. There are gospels 276 00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:50,640 Speaker 1: that we have four copies of from four different apostles. 277 00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:54,760 Speaker 1: We have those as gospels. And then there's also the 278 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:59,800 Speaker 1: gospel that all of the gospels proclaim. It's the proc 279 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:04,359 Speaker 1: of good news. Is gospel, and that is not in 280 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:10,080 Speaker 1: the stars. Okay, Now, did he create the stars and 281 00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:14,320 Speaker 1: arrange them and name them? Yes, the Bible says that 282 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:16,200 Speaker 1: he knows all the stars. He made all the stars, 283 00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:21,880 Speaker 1: He named all the stars. Did he arrange them for 284 00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:29,159 Speaker 1: signs and seasons in a way that he arranged the 285 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:33,159 Speaker 1: trees for signs and seasons. We could look at a 286 00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:38,159 Speaker 1: red oak tree and know when the buds are coming, 287 00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:41,119 Speaker 1: that spring is coming. In fact, a mesquite tree in Texas. 288 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:43,480 Speaker 1: When we know the mesquite tree buds, my grandpa used 289 00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:47,600 Speaker 1: to say this, when the mosquite tree starts budding, you 290 00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:50,919 Speaker 1: know you could put out your garden because a mesquite 291 00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:55,320 Speaker 1: tree will only bud after the last frost. That becomes 292 00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:57,840 Speaker 1: a sign for us on earth as we take dominion 293 00:19:57,880 --> 00:20:00,440 Speaker 1: of this earth. We could look to different things as 294 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:07,560 Speaker 1: a sign of earthly things, not heavenly things. So we 295 00:20:07,600 --> 00:20:10,600 Speaker 1: could look at a tree and know that the last 296 00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,439 Speaker 1: frost is over, and we could put out a garden. 297 00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:14,840 Speaker 1: But we can't look at a tree and say God 298 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:19,800 Speaker 1: is coming in three months because of the tree is 299 00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:23,200 Speaker 1: giving me the sign. The same way, you can't look 300 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:27,520 Speaker 1: at the stars and see any kind of heavenly messages 301 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:33,120 Speaker 1: at all. That would be a terrible heresy, a terrible heresy. 302 00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:35,320 Speaker 1: But you could look at the stars all day and 303 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,800 Speaker 1: go look look at how they make shapes and they 304 00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,520 Speaker 1: make creatures. And look at that one looks like an alligator. Wow, 305 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:46,239 Speaker 1: that one is moving. It's a shooting star. Look how 306 00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:49,680 Speaker 1: beautiful they are. Look how small we are. Look how 307 00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:54,080 Speaker 1: depth the great depth of the galaxy is. You could 308 00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:57,160 Speaker 1: say all that, But as soon as you start saying 309 00:20:57,160 --> 00:21:03,159 Speaker 1: they're arranged in signs and messages for me from God, 310 00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:07,400 Speaker 1: it gets very dangerous. Let's take a break, be right back. 311 00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:14,640 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to the podcast. You know a great 312 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:16,760 Speaker 1: way to get a hold of me, or to send 313 00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:18,840 Speaker 1: me a message, or to have me send you a 314 00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:24,119 Speaker 1: message is a cameo. Cameo dot com slash Granger Smith 315 00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,840 Speaker 1: or you can download the cameo app and search for 316 00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:30,040 Speaker 1: me Granger Smith. It's a super easy format and I've 317 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:32,840 Speaker 1: done cameo for about three and a half years now 318 00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:35,560 Speaker 1: and it's just part of my daily life. I love 319 00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:37,600 Speaker 1: doing it and I love being able to communicate. What 320 00:21:37,640 --> 00:21:41,320 Speaker 1: it is is you send me a message and I 321 00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:44,520 Speaker 1: record you back a video message of whatever you want 322 00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:46,840 Speaker 1: me to say. It could be happy birthday, happy anniversary, 323 00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:52,960 Speaker 1: words of encouragement, happy engagement, announcing babies. I've done pretty 324 00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:57,080 Speaker 1: much everything right now is a good time for Valentine's Day. 325 00:21:57,720 --> 00:22:00,400 Speaker 1: You need that last minute gift, you need to say 326 00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:03,879 Speaker 1: something the last minute for your Valentine. I got you covered. 327 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:07,520 Speaker 1: Just go to cameo dot com slash Granger Smith send 328 00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:09,880 Speaker 1: me your request for whoever you want me to send 329 00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:12,520 Speaker 1: it to. Also, this is a big week for ye 330 00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:16,880 Speaker 1: Ye Apparel coming up this Friday the seventeenth. Are all 331 00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:21,440 Speaker 1: new twenty twenty three winter launch. So excited about this. 332 00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:23,520 Speaker 1: We have so many really cool items. You could find 333 00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:26,639 Speaker 1: out more at ye ye dot com. Make sure you 334 00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:30,040 Speaker 1: get there about ten am Central. Because you wait too long, 335 00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:33,160 Speaker 1: your favorite sizes will start being sold out. You don't 336 00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:35,480 Speaker 1: want that to happen, so go to yeye dot com 337 00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:38,600 Speaker 1: right now to get your preview. You could also follow 338 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:42,000 Speaker 1: yee Ye Apparel on Instagram or follow me on Instagram 339 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:50,280 Speaker 1: at granger Smith. Back to the podcast, All right, back 340 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:51,960 Speaker 1: to the podcast. If you have a question for me, 341 00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:55,679 Speaker 1: email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Could be about 342 00:22:55,720 --> 00:22:58,000 Speaker 1: any subject. My only thing is please don't send the 343 00:22:58,000 --> 00:23:02,480 Speaker 1: same one twice because gets lost or trashed. And don't 344 00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:05,760 Speaker 1: send me one that's much longer than like a phone length, 345 00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:08,639 Speaker 1: because then it makes it difficult to read that question 346 00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:11,760 Speaker 1: on the podcast. Okay, let's get back into this subject line. 347 00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:15,200 Speaker 1: If this one says girlfriends past, grant your. My name 348 00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:18,679 Speaker 1: is Kyle. I'm twenty two. I'm madly in love with 349 00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:22,160 Speaker 1: my girlfriend of six months, and she feels the same 350 00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:26,560 Speaker 1: about me. She's amazing in every way, and we've already 351 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:30,880 Speaker 1: talked about marriage. I love everything about her other than 352 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:37,199 Speaker 1: her past. She's had multiple previous boyfriends before me, and 353 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:40,320 Speaker 1: I just cannot seem to get the thought out of 354 00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:43,000 Speaker 1: my head that she's been with them and has had 355 00:23:43,119 --> 00:23:47,840 Speaker 1: sex with guys other than me. I just cannot get 356 00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:50,520 Speaker 1: the mental images out of my head. I just don't 357 00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:53,080 Speaker 1: know if it's jealousy or what it is. But I 358 00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:58,760 Speaker 1: don't know how to go through this. What are your thoughts? Thinks? 359 00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:02,199 Speaker 1: I'm sorry that last sentence you said, but I know 360 00:24:02,520 --> 00:24:06,679 Speaker 1: I'm not the only one going through this. What are 361 00:24:06,680 --> 00:24:11,240 Speaker 1: your thoughts? Things? Okay, Kyle, appreciate you, bro, thank you 362 00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:15,040 Speaker 1: for emailing. Twenty two years old, madly in love girlfriend 363 00:24:15,119 --> 00:24:19,040 Speaker 1: six months she feels the same, amazing every way not 364 00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:27,479 Speaker 1: quite right, and you've talked about marriage. Cool. Yeah, I 365 00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:32,560 Speaker 1: hear you. I'm hearing you here, and this is what 366 00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:34,719 Speaker 1: we're going to talk about, Kyle. So me and you 367 00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,520 Speaker 1: road tripping, right, this is a great road trip question. 368 00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:41,879 Speaker 1: Driving down the highway, me and you and you're like, man, Granger, 369 00:24:41,920 --> 00:24:45,080 Speaker 1: I gotta I'm like, hey, how's the girl? Right? How's 370 00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:49,480 Speaker 1: the girl? And you go, man, it's great, everything's great. 371 00:24:50,200 --> 00:24:52,280 Speaker 1: And you know, I really love madly in love with 372 00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:58,480 Speaker 1: her and I'm like, but but man, I can't. I 373 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:05,880 Speaker 1: can't get over her past boyfriends always think about it 374 00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:08,280 Speaker 1: makes me sneeze. I just think about this, Kyle makes 375 00:25:08,280 --> 00:25:15,520 Speaker 1: me sneeze. Excuse me. This is something that you're gonna 376 00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:17,720 Speaker 1: have to look at who she is now? This is 377 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:21,240 Speaker 1: what this is, what's gonna play into this, this this answer. 378 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:25,359 Speaker 1: So much of what I need you to do now 379 00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:30,479 Speaker 1: is look at who she is now today? Who is 380 00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:33,040 Speaker 1: she today? Kyle? That's what I tell you in the 381 00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:35,440 Speaker 1: cab of the truck. You're not gonna look at her 382 00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:39,840 Speaker 1: and who she was with past boyfriends. I know that 383 00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:42,640 Speaker 1: that's difficult to do, but this is an exercise you're 384 00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:45,600 Speaker 1: gonna have to force yourself in because trust trust me, 385 00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:50,440 Speaker 1: no one wants to look at your past either. Kyle. 386 00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:54,359 Speaker 1: What you know about her past? And you know about 387 00:25:54,359 --> 00:25:57,520 Speaker 1: these ex boyfriends because she's opened up and told you, 388 00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:03,080 Speaker 1: But there's stuff she doesn't know about you. What has 389 00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:06,280 Speaker 1: happened in your past? What are things that have happened 390 00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:11,680 Speaker 1: that no one knows about? And what if everything you've 391 00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:15,679 Speaker 1: done in your life was put on a tape that 392 00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:19,040 Speaker 1: sounds so old tape digit is put on a digital 393 00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:22,920 Speaker 1: file and we all got to watch it, Kyle, we 394 00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:28,080 Speaker 1: get to see your whole life on one click. How 395 00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:32,000 Speaker 1: would you feel there's stuff you're ashamed of? There's stuff 396 00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:36,399 Speaker 1: that you wish that no one could see. Hm. I 397 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:38,399 Speaker 1: would say yes. It would be very strange if you 398 00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:40,960 Speaker 1: said no, because you're a human. I'm not blaming you. 399 00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:44,879 Speaker 1: I'm saying me. You everyone, there's stuff and we just 400 00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:48,240 Speaker 1: don't want people to know in our past. But that's 401 00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:51,080 Speaker 1: not who we are. That the past doesn't define us, 402 00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:54,119 Speaker 1: it refines us. I put that in a song. The 403 00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:58,440 Speaker 1: past does not define us, It refines us. That makes 404 00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:03,560 Speaker 1: us better now that we've learned from it, hopefully. So 405 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:07,120 Speaker 1: who is this girlfriend today? Who is she today? Has 406 00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:09,919 Speaker 1: she learned? Does she have a repentant heart? Is she 407 00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:13,320 Speaker 1: not like that anymore? Kyle? Is she having sex with you? Bro? 408 00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:19,679 Speaker 1: Is she? Hmm? That's what i'd ask you in the 409 00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:22,359 Speaker 1: cab of the truck. You haven't sex with this girl 410 00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:27,040 Speaker 1: now because you haven't married her yet, And you just 411 00:27:27,280 --> 00:27:30,800 Speaker 1: might be another one of these ex boyfriends in line 412 00:27:30,960 --> 00:27:33,720 Speaker 1: that somebody else has got to worry about. You might 413 00:27:33,800 --> 00:27:37,160 Speaker 1: be that guy. Are you that guy? Oh? No, man, no, Granger. 414 00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:39,560 Speaker 1: I'm madly in love with her and she feels the same. 415 00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:44,320 Speaker 1: She's amazing. We've even talked about marriage. Ah. Is that 416 00:27:44,359 --> 00:27:49,719 Speaker 1: what the last guy said? Be careful, man, be careful. 417 00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:54,159 Speaker 1: This is a tricky situation. I hope, I hope that 418 00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:56,960 Speaker 1: you're looking at this from a perspective of you saying, 419 00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:02,800 Speaker 1: we're starting a new chapter, we're laying we're laying some 420 00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:07,040 Speaker 1: new ground here, and I'm I'm respecting her in a 421 00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:11,280 Speaker 1: way that the past boyfriends haven't. Man, what if he 422 00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:14,520 Speaker 1: said that. I hope that's true. And what if she 423 00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:17,000 Speaker 1: is she has a repentant heart and she's like I 424 00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:22,200 Speaker 1: I regret my past and I'm not that person anymore. 425 00:28:22,920 --> 00:28:26,239 Speaker 1: I'm a new person. Now. What if she's saying that 426 00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:31,840 Speaker 1: this changes everything. If that's the case, that's what you're 427 00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:35,119 Speaker 1: gonna be looking at who she is today, not this 428 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,720 Speaker 1: past girl. Okay, you know gonna You're not gonna worry 429 00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:40,080 Speaker 1: about the past unless she still is that person. And 430 00:28:40,120 --> 00:28:42,400 Speaker 1: if she is, then you don't need to be with her. 431 00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:53,160 Speaker 1: Just make sure you're not the new ex boyfriend that 432 00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:55,640 Speaker 1: sneeze I had. That last question proves that we do 433 00:28:55,720 --> 00:29:01,160 Speaker 1: not cut this podcast. We roll with it. I don't 434 00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,240 Speaker 1: have notes. I Don'm not prepared. We roll with it. 435 00:29:06,520 --> 00:29:09,719 Speaker 1: Seven glide of the next one says, parachute for children, Grandeur. 436 00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:12,560 Speaker 1: I was listening to this week's podcast ten twenty four 437 00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:16,880 Speaker 1: twenty two. That's old where you gave your analogy on 438 00:29:17,000 --> 00:29:19,000 Speaker 1: the plane is going down, we run out of fuel. 439 00:29:20,040 --> 00:29:23,320 Speaker 1: You wouldn't want to have a parachute for adults and 440 00:29:23,440 --> 00:29:28,040 Speaker 1: other individuals. Wait, what what did I say? Sometimes? I 441 00:29:28,080 --> 00:29:31,800 Speaker 1: don't know what I said. You gave the analogy on 442 00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,760 Speaker 1: the plane as going down out of fuel, wouldn't want 443 00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:37,800 Speaker 1: to have a parachute. You wouldn't want to have a parachute. 444 00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:40,920 Speaker 1: I don't know what that's exactly what you typed, And 445 00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:44,200 Speaker 1: I'm not sure what that means for adults and other individuals. 446 00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:47,600 Speaker 1: They know that they could build that relationship with God 447 00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:50,920 Speaker 1: to get that parachute, and it merely becomes a choice 448 00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:53,280 Speaker 1: for those individuals. My wife and I have a three 449 00:29:53,320 --> 00:29:54,920 Speaker 1: year old daughter and a one year old son. My 450 00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:58,440 Speaker 1: question is, how do children that young? Oh, I see 451 00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:01,200 Speaker 1: where this is going commit their life to Christ to 452 00:30:01,240 --> 00:30:04,920 Speaker 1: get that parachute. I see what you're talking about, As 453 00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:07,400 Speaker 1: I imagine, there is no get out jail free card 454 00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:11,320 Speaker 1: for children. Thanks for continuing to share your love in 455 00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:15,520 Speaker 1: Christ and working to move others in His direction on 456 00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:19,400 Speaker 1: all your platforms. Tyler Tyler, thanks for the email bro. Sorry, 457 00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:21,600 Speaker 1: I was playing catch up with trying to understand what 458 00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:25,440 Speaker 1: I told you in the past. I'm not who I 459 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:27,959 Speaker 1: was in the past, Tyler, judge me from the present. 460 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:34,800 Speaker 1: Just kidding. Okay, your question is how do you how 461 00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:37,000 Speaker 1: do you prepare children to go to heaven? That's your question. 462 00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:40,720 Speaker 1: You have a three year old daughter and a one 463 00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:45,720 Speaker 1: year old son. Yeah, you pray for him, You pray, 464 00:30:45,720 --> 00:30:49,280 Speaker 1: oh for them, You pray under them, you pray around them, 465 00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:51,920 Speaker 1: you pray at dinner, you pray in front of them. 466 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:54,640 Speaker 1: You let them catch you on your knees. You let 467 00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:57,240 Speaker 1: them catch you walking out of their their little room. 468 00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:02,640 Speaker 1: And it's six forty five in the morning, and they're 469 00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:05,040 Speaker 1: coming out, your three year old daughters just waking up, 470 00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:08,160 Speaker 1: getting ready to get eat her cheerios, And she sees 471 00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:15,360 Speaker 1: daddy in there reading his Bible, studying like his life 472 00:31:15,360 --> 00:31:18,200 Speaker 1: depends on it. And then she remembers that when she's 473 00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:21,320 Speaker 1: four and five and six and seven and eight, and 474 00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:24,720 Speaker 1: you pour into her and you love her and you 475 00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:28,560 Speaker 1: respect her, and you love her mama, and you respect 476 00:31:28,640 --> 00:31:32,680 Speaker 1: her mama, and she sees who you are and your heart, 477 00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:35,719 Speaker 1: and she sees where your allegiance lies and what you 478 00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,320 Speaker 1: care about and what you do and who you worship, 479 00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:41,719 Speaker 1: and how you lead the household, and you pray for 480 00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:45,400 Speaker 1: her every night. You say, God, take this child, love 481 00:31:45,480 --> 00:31:50,400 Speaker 1: this little girl, Bring her into your kingdom, Have mercy 482 00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:57,800 Speaker 1: on us. Bless this child every single night, every single morning, 483 00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:00,160 Speaker 1: every single meal, and when you think about it in 484 00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:03,880 Speaker 1: the middle of the day. That's what you do. Brother. 485 00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:08,800 Speaker 1: She can't understand anything at three, but that's what you 486 00:32:08,840 --> 00:32:17,960 Speaker 1: pour over her. That's all you could do, all right. 487 00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:22,880 Speaker 1: Random choice email subject line says tell me how Hey Granger. 488 00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:26,320 Speaker 1: My name is Luke. I'm from Michigan. I'm eighteen. I 489 00:32:26,360 --> 00:32:30,000 Speaker 1: have always been single. Even though I know with everything 490 00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:32,239 Speaker 1: in me that God does not want me to have 491 00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:36,200 Speaker 1: a girlfriend, I still find myself wanting one. I hear 492 00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,080 Speaker 1: you say all the time, how to learn to be 493 00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:42,240 Speaker 1: content and single? Can you give me some clarity on 494 00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:45,640 Speaker 1: how to get to that point? Love? The podcast help 495 00:32:45,720 --> 00:32:50,320 Speaker 1: so much, Luke. Appreciate you, brother, Thank you for emailing. 496 00:32:51,240 --> 00:32:54,000 Speaker 1: I love the state of Michigan. Good to hear from you. Man. 497 00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:59,320 Speaker 1: I'm gonna beat you up real good, Luke. That's how 498 00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:03,000 Speaker 1: much I love you, buddy. What are you talking about? God? 499 00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:06,520 Speaker 1: Does it you everything in you says God doesn't want 500 00:33:06,560 --> 00:33:08,280 Speaker 1: you to have a girlfriend. Where do you read that? 501 00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:12,320 Speaker 1: Maybe that goes back to that email about the stars 502 00:33:12,360 --> 00:33:14,760 Speaker 1: that God gave you a He wrote it in the stars, 503 00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:19,160 Speaker 1: he said, Luke, you're not going to have a girlfriend, 504 00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:23,480 Speaker 1: and he wrote it in Latin. I'm just kidding. You 505 00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:25,840 Speaker 1: don't know that. You don't know with everything in you 506 00:33:25,880 --> 00:33:27,320 Speaker 1: that he doesn't want you to have a girlfriend. You 507 00:33:27,360 --> 00:33:29,959 Speaker 1: don't know that. You don't know that. Don't say that. 508 00:33:30,360 --> 00:33:34,520 Speaker 1: Take that out of your email. Okay, second part, I'm 509 00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:36,920 Speaker 1: going to beat you up on. What's the next part. 510 00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:39,560 Speaker 1: You hear me say all the time to be content 511 00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:42,800 Speaker 1: and single. Yes, I do, And then you say, give 512 00:33:42,800 --> 00:33:46,080 Speaker 1: me some clarity on how to get to that point. Hey, 513 00:33:46,280 --> 00:33:50,000 Speaker 1: no beating up on that one. That's that's it. I love. 514 00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:52,800 Speaker 1: I love to try to be as practical as I can. 515 00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:55,800 Speaker 1: If I'm not practical, you guys call me out because 516 00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:57,440 Speaker 1: I don't want to. I don't ever want to say 517 00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:59,800 Speaker 1: things that goes over people's head and they're like, I 518 00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:01,520 Speaker 1: don't I don't even know what this dude's talking about. 519 00:34:01,520 --> 00:34:04,520 Speaker 1: I don't know what granger, he's just blabbering on about 520 00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:06,680 Speaker 1: something I don't know what it is. I want to 521 00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:10,640 Speaker 1: be practical and I want to be like you said, 522 00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:15,719 Speaker 1: I want to have clarity on the points. I don't 523 00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:21,719 Speaker 1: like to hear anything that is vague, especially when it 524 00:34:21,719 --> 00:34:25,920 Speaker 1: comes to something serious like this, Like you're eighteen and 525 00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:27,840 Speaker 1: you're trying to figure out what to do with your life. 526 00:34:28,040 --> 00:34:31,120 Speaker 1: It's basically what you're asking and you need some clarity 527 00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:36,279 Speaker 1: because you feel an anxiety to have a girlfriend. So 528 00:34:36,400 --> 00:34:39,600 Speaker 1: let's dig in on that a little bit. Okay, that 529 00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:45,200 Speaker 1: you have a feeling that you want a girlfriend, man, 530 00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:48,120 Speaker 1: I mean, that's a natural feeling for an eighteen year 531 00:34:48,160 --> 00:34:51,839 Speaker 1: old boy. And I'm not gonna blame you for that, Luke, 532 00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:56,120 Speaker 1: I don't I'm not gonna say that that's a bad, wrong, sinful, 533 00:34:56,360 --> 00:35:00,480 Speaker 1: terrible feeling. I'm not saying that. If you've if you've 534 00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:05,320 Speaker 1: heard me say something like that, I want to say gently, 535 00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:08,279 Speaker 1: I feel like you've misunderstood me when it comes to that, 536 00:35:09,320 --> 00:35:12,200 Speaker 1: because that's a natural thing for an eighteen year old 537 00:35:12,239 --> 00:35:15,000 Speaker 1: boy to go shere, would like to have a girlfriend. 538 00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:20,840 Speaker 1: But there's a difference in that. Sure would she would 539 00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:22,480 Speaker 1: like to have a girlfriend, She would like to know 540 00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:26,719 Speaker 1: what it's like to talk to a girl, To take 541 00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:29,600 Speaker 1: a girl to Sonic and get a burger and a coke. 542 00:35:31,239 --> 00:35:34,760 Speaker 1: I wonder what that's like, take her to a dance, 543 00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:40,040 Speaker 1: listen to a favorite song with her. I don't think 544 00:35:40,040 --> 00:35:42,359 Speaker 1: there's anything wrong with that. But here's where it gets bad. 545 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:46,640 Speaker 1: I'm obsessed. All I could do is think about this 546 00:35:46,719 --> 00:35:50,000 Speaker 1: one girl, and I just I need her and I 547 00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:53,000 Speaker 1: miss her and it hurts my heart and I can't 548 00:35:53,040 --> 00:35:55,200 Speaker 1: sleep at night. It just breaks me up. And she 549 00:35:55,239 --> 00:35:57,080 Speaker 1: doesn't give me the time of day. And I don't 550 00:35:57,080 --> 00:36:00,959 Speaker 1: know if she likes me or there's so out there 551 00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,600 Speaker 1: and I don't know who it is. I'm so lonely. 552 00:36:03,640 --> 00:36:07,000 Speaker 1: I just can't. I can't stand it. I'm not I 553 00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:09,880 Speaker 1: have anxiety and I'm not content. I'm just I feel 554 00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:13,239 Speaker 1: this urgency. I just don't know what to do as 555 00:36:13,440 --> 00:36:18,120 Speaker 1: it just consumes me like that. That that's wrong. Okay, 556 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:20,200 Speaker 1: that's that's when I come in and go, no, no, 557 00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:23,680 Speaker 1: no, no no. We have to learn to be content and single. 558 00:36:24,840 --> 00:36:30,880 Speaker 1: But I don't think there's anything wrong with saying I 559 00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:33,960 Speaker 1: kind of this is what you're you said. I still 560 00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:37,439 Speaker 1: find myself wanting one. I don't think there's anything wrong 561 00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:40,120 Speaker 1: with an eighteen year old guy going, I'd like to 562 00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:44,480 Speaker 1: have a girlfriend. Yeah, be honest with you, guys, I'd 563 00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:48,600 Speaker 1: like to have a girlfriend. Is that an obsession yet? 564 00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:51,640 Speaker 1: I don't know is it? Is it a healthy You're 565 00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:57,160 Speaker 1: just eighteen? That's okay. So after that, now, let's get practical, 566 00:36:57,239 --> 00:36:59,920 Speaker 1: let's get to let's get the clarity on the point. Okay, 567 00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:07,040 Speaker 1: making this up as I go, Bro, what are you 568 00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:10,600 Speaker 1: doing with your mind and your heart? That's what I 569 00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:14,000 Speaker 1: would ask you. What what are you doing? Are you 570 00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:18,319 Speaker 1: the third wheel in a relationship that your buddy and 571 00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:22,800 Speaker 1: his girlfriend and you're the third wheel that's not helping things? 572 00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:28,240 Speaker 1: Are you singing home, playing video games on the couch 573 00:37:28,719 --> 00:37:32,000 Speaker 1: and your mom is bringing you peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, 574 00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:40,239 Speaker 1: that's not helping things. Are you plugged in in a 575 00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:45,560 Speaker 1: local church and you're you're you're serving, and you're you're 576 00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:48,360 Speaker 1: planning on a mission trip to Peru maybe, and you 577 00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:51,319 Speaker 1: guys are fundraising so that you can you could go 578 00:37:51,719 --> 00:37:55,120 Speaker 1: to build homes in Peru, and you're gonna pour into 579 00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:58,160 Speaker 1: this little community there and you're gonna, you're gonna you're 580 00:37:58,160 --> 00:38:01,640 Speaker 1: gonna help cut chop firewood for ryoul that lives there, 581 00:38:02,719 --> 00:38:07,160 Speaker 1: right and you you you were micro focusing on this. 582 00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:14,440 Speaker 1: Maybe that's exaggerating, but it's possible. Something like a mission 583 00:38:14,440 --> 00:38:17,160 Speaker 1: trip short term mission trip to Peru as at an 584 00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:20,799 Speaker 1: eighteen year old through your local church after fundraising is 585 00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:24,320 Speaker 1: not too far fetched. But what what if you became 586 00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:29,200 Speaker 1: focused and passionate about something like this or maybe it's 587 00:38:29,239 --> 00:38:31,560 Speaker 1: a it's a tech school and you're gonna go and 588 00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:34,160 Speaker 1: you're gonna you're gonna study welding and you're gonna get 589 00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:36,759 Speaker 1: your certificate and you're gonna go out and you get 590 00:38:36,800 --> 00:38:40,120 Speaker 1: your making. You're slowly making a path for yourself on 591 00:38:40,280 --> 00:38:43,440 Speaker 1: what you want to do, and you're growing your passions 592 00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:45,960 Speaker 1: and you have friends that do it with you. And 593 00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:49,279 Speaker 1: you guys are just now getting into bird hunting and 594 00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:52,640 Speaker 1: you're thinking about getting a bird dog until you've been 595 00:38:52,719 --> 00:38:57,840 Speaker 1: kind of researching puppies. These are these are good passionate 596 00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:01,120 Speaker 1: things for an eighteen year old to start wrecting energy, 597 00:39:01,800 --> 00:39:05,360 Speaker 1: learning how to be single and content Because you start 598 00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:10,440 Speaker 1: you start working towards this stuff, you start pouring yourself 599 00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:15,759 Speaker 1: into passions by design, and you don't have room to 600 00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:21,320 Speaker 1: sit around and go Sure, am lonely. My other friends 601 00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:25,560 Speaker 1: are dating, looking at Instagram, and everyone has somebody but me. 602 00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:30,040 Speaker 1: That is toxic for your brain. That is that's where 603 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:33,560 Speaker 1: you could start wearing yourself down. So you gotta get 604 00:39:33,560 --> 00:39:37,800 Speaker 1: busy being passionate about something. They will grange. I'm not 605 00:39:37,840 --> 00:39:44,319 Speaker 1: a passionate person. Get passionate. You can't tell me. There's 606 00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:49,640 Speaker 1: nothing in this big world that you can't get behind. 607 00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:53,520 Speaker 1: Like fundraising for a short term mission trip in Peru 608 00:39:53,719 --> 00:39:55,759 Speaker 1: sounds like a pretty I kind of like that. I 609 00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:57,640 Speaker 1: just made that up and I'm kind of liking it 610 00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:01,279 Speaker 1: for you. Luke, you get the name for it. Bro, 611 00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:07,080 Speaker 1: You've got the name for it. Okay, does that make sense. 612 00:40:07,280 --> 00:40:09,600 Speaker 1: I'm gonna make sure because you said give me some clarity, 613 00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:11,919 Speaker 1: I want to make sure it was clear. I want 614 00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:14,560 Speaker 1: to make sure that when I give you practical stuff 615 00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:18,319 Speaker 1: I'm talking about you got to do something. You have 616 00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:23,160 Speaker 1: to do something you're passionate about, hopefully with other guys. 617 00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,080 Speaker 1: You're pulling in other people and you're building a small 618 00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:30,839 Speaker 1: community one guy, one friend, two guys. If you don't 619 00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:33,879 Speaker 1: have any friends, then you seek the passion and then 620 00:40:33,920 --> 00:40:36,400 Speaker 1: you find people that are going the same direction within 621 00:40:36,480 --> 00:40:39,880 Speaker 1: that passion. So if it's welding, I want to be welding. 622 00:40:39,880 --> 00:40:42,880 Speaker 1: We already use that example. You're to go into law enforcement. 623 00:40:42,880 --> 00:40:45,520 Speaker 1: I want to go into law enforcement. So I'm gonna 624 00:40:45,560 --> 00:40:50,920 Speaker 1: go to this this uh school, what do they call it? Academy? 625 00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:54,919 Speaker 1: You're gonna go to the police academy and you're gonna 626 00:40:54,960 --> 00:40:57,640 Speaker 1: find somebody on that same path and you go, hey, man, 627 00:40:57,520 --> 00:41:00,239 Speaker 1: my name is Luke. Now I get what's up. I'm 628 00:41:01,520 --> 00:41:06,480 Speaker 1: Tom I'm going to academy. You're like me too. I 629 00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:09,760 Speaker 1: love it. And then you guys just connect like that's 630 00:41:10,120 --> 00:41:14,880 Speaker 1: then you have a friend. That's how this happens. Is 631 00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:21,600 Speaker 1: that practical enough? Get busy, Luke, Get busy. Okay, so 632 00:41:22,239 --> 00:41:26,560 Speaker 1: let's recap. It's okay to want to have a girlfriend, 633 00:41:26,600 --> 00:41:29,120 Speaker 1: it's not okay to obsess about it. And if you 634 00:41:29,160 --> 00:41:32,960 Speaker 1: start leaking over to the obsession side of this equation, 635 00:41:33,680 --> 00:41:39,440 Speaker 1: get busy, Get busy doing something you're passionate about. That 636 00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:43,560 Speaker 1: will build your confidence in being content because eventually you 637 00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:50,280 Speaker 1: look around you go, I'm okay by myself. I'm content. 638 00:41:52,680 --> 00:41:56,120 Speaker 1: Love you guys, see you next Monday. Thanks for joining 639 00:41:56,160 --> 00:41:59,520 Speaker 1: me on the Grangersmith podcast. I appreciate all of you guys, 640 00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:02,480 Speaker 1: you could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. 641 00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:05,880 Speaker 1: If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel. Hit that 642 00:42:05,880 --> 00:42:08,960 Speaker 1: little like button and the notification spell so that you 643 00:42:09,080 --> 00:42:12,680 Speaker 1: never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have 644 00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:14,800 Speaker 1: a question for me that you would like me to answer, 645 00:42:15,239 --> 00:42:20,000 Speaker 1: email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Yie