WEBVTT - Call It with Whitney Cummings 0:00:00.960 --> 0:00:04.800 Call It What It Is with Jessica Capshaw and Camille Luddington, 0:00:05.240 --> 0:00:07.120 an iHeartRadio podcast. 0:00:18.920 --> 0:00:23.480 Well, Hello, Hello, Hello, hello everybody, and welcome to another 0:00:23.520 --> 0:00:25.920 episode of Call It What It Is. 0:00:26.600 --> 0:00:29.479 I'm so excited to talk to this guest today. I've 0:00:29.560 --> 0:00:32.199 touched many things. I've seen her live, I've seen her 0:00:32.280 --> 0:00:34.880 show and she makes me a laugh. 0:00:35.360 --> 0:00:36.720 I feel like, for me, she was one of the 0:00:36.760 --> 0:00:39.320 first like modern comedians. 0:00:39.600 --> 0:00:42.120 Yeah that I the were female that I knew knew of. 0:00:42.800 --> 0:00:44.040 Yeah, which is crazy to. 0:00:44.000 --> 0:00:46.519 Say we need more, but like, I just feel like 0:00:46.800 --> 0:00:49.600 it was like the name that I knew the most 0:00:50.280 --> 0:00:51.040 back in the day. 0:00:51.560 --> 0:00:54.840 She's a famous comedian, she was very famous. Whitney Cummings. 0:00:55.360 --> 0:00:56.959 Okay, let's bring her in. 0:00:57.840 --> 0:01:02.880 My god, Ahi, yay, it's annoying the glasses, No, not annoying. 0:01:03.040 --> 0:01:05.040 Don't worry mine on so you can be annoyed by 0:01:05.080 --> 0:01:05.600 my reflection. 0:01:05.800 --> 0:01:07.960 Oh my gosh, please no, as long as it isn't. 0:01:08.319 --> 0:01:09.800 No, Yeah, Joss, you wear yours too? 0:01:10.000 --> 0:01:11.360 Ohther are great frames. 0:01:11.959 --> 0:01:16.080 Thanks. I had twenty twenty vision my whole life. I 0:01:16.120 --> 0:01:20.320 had to my two parents. My two genetic parents were 0:01:20.520 --> 0:01:23.840 like blind as bats. They got childhood glasses, and I 0:01:23.880 --> 0:01:24.240 was like. 0:01:24.240 --> 0:01:24.800 I got this. 0:01:24.880 --> 0:01:25.720 I'm twenty twenty. 0:01:26.080 --> 0:01:29.039 And then two years ago I had a kid like 0:01:29.160 --> 0:01:31.440 put something in front of my face, but like real close, 0:01:31.920 --> 0:01:33.640 like real close, and I did that thing where I 0:01:33.959 --> 0:01:36.280 pushed my head away, like I can't see that so close, 0:01:37.280 --> 0:01:38.400 And I thought, I'm old. 0:01:40.920 --> 0:01:45.800 Here's the thing, Jessica, I love getting older. I don't 0:01:45.800 --> 0:01:47.440 want to see things. I don't want to see the news. 0:01:47.440 --> 0:01:48.040 I don't want to be old. 0:01:48.680 --> 0:01:50.280 I love God a focus. 0:01:50.400 --> 0:01:52.880 I'm like, good, I don't have to do that. Great. Yeah, 0:01:52.920 --> 0:01:53.560 it's freedom. 0:01:54.120 --> 0:01:56.760 Whitney, you have a one year old? 0:01:57.360 --> 0:01:57.720 I do? 0:01:58.040 --> 0:02:00.120 Did he just turn one? As he Sagittarius? 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:02.600 Just turn out? My God. I of all the things 0:02:02.600 --> 0:02:04.559 I have done in my life, I have worked so hard, 0:02:04.600 --> 0:02:07.120 my greatest accomplishment is having a Sage baby. 0:02:07.560 --> 0:02:08.480 I'm a Sage baby. 0:02:08.480 --> 0:02:10.680 By the way, I have never had you're having a 0:02:10.840 --> 0:02:15.200 Sage baby. I've never heard. No, I've never heard anyone 0:02:15.280 --> 0:02:17.240 say like, you're having a Taurus baby, Like, what is 0:02:17.280 --> 0:02:18.600 it with sage babies. 0:02:19.560 --> 0:02:22.840 I first off, he's going to be amazing, obviously. 0:02:23.919 --> 0:02:25.239 I know. I. 0:02:25.480 --> 0:02:28.160 Actually he's gonna be really blunt. We're known for being 0:02:28.200 --> 0:02:31.760 really blunt. He's gonna love to travel. But I was 0:02:31.800 --> 0:02:34.040 a good kid. I think we're gonna I think sages 0:02:34.080 --> 0:02:36.080 are good, solid, like grounded kids. 0:02:36.160 --> 0:02:38.560 Do you believe in astrology? Like for real? 0:02:39.400 --> 0:02:42.760 I did not used to, but I do now I do. 0:02:42.800 --> 0:02:44.480 The more people I meet and I'm like, what are you? 0:02:44.520 --> 0:02:48.120 And now I see like the similarities in all the signs. 0:02:48.160 --> 0:02:49.919 So yeah. I also feel like though when someone finds 0:02:49.919 --> 0:02:53.120 out their sign, they do lean into that more. I'm like, 0:02:53.760 --> 0:02:56.280 you know what I'm saying, they get more of a sage. 0:02:56.360 --> 0:02:57.639 It's a confirmation bias. 0:02:57.800 --> 0:03:00.800 Yes, you of course are going to make it sounds smart. 0:03:01.000 --> 0:03:05.040 I'm kind of fascinated by like that astrology. If it's 0:03:05.040 --> 0:03:07.800 the stars and the gravity wherever, fine, But I actually 0:03:07.800 --> 0:03:09.960 think that there also could be another explanation, which is like, 0:03:10.360 --> 0:03:13.720 are like the proximity of our birthdays to other holidays, 0:03:13.720 --> 0:03:15.880 Like because when you're young, your birthday is the biggest deal, 0:03:16.080 --> 0:03:19.119 you know, and the proximity to another holiday, like people 0:03:19.160 --> 0:03:22.079 are like virgos, Like virgos are like they're all about 0:03:22.120 --> 0:03:24.200 work and they're all about being organized. It's like, well, 0:03:24.200 --> 0:03:25.440 my birthday was the first day of. 0:03:25.360 --> 0:03:27.720 School, Like, so you're back to school, back to school. 0:03:27.880 --> 0:03:29.320 So Virgos, you know what I mean. So it's like 0:03:29.360 --> 0:03:32.800 and then Capricorn's like, you know, they're like, you know, 0:03:32.880 --> 0:03:34.600 don't want a lot, they're insecure, they this and this, 0:03:34.680 --> 0:03:37.880 but they come right after holiday year. No one's giving 0:03:37.920 --> 0:03:40.240 them presents. Yeah, on January fifth. 0:03:40.320 --> 0:03:41.200 This is a theory. 0:03:41.600 --> 0:03:43.360 It's kind of interesting. I don't know. That's kind of 0:03:43.400 --> 0:03:45.360 like to me, something that makes it work a little more, 0:03:45.360 --> 0:03:48.040 and like, you know, anyway, I believe it. 0:03:48.320 --> 0:03:50.800 I explain my leoness. I know, I was thinking, I 0:03:50.800 --> 0:03:53.400 have a son who's Leo. Well you're you're you're in 0:03:53.520 --> 0:03:57.040 summer vacation mode, so no wonder your loving life. 0:03:57.200 --> 0:04:01.560 That's it, and no one comes to your party. They're 0:04:01.600 --> 0:04:04.000 like your birthday party. Kids aren't in town. Everyone's out 0:04:04.000 --> 0:04:05.640 of town, so you have to work extra hard and 0:04:05.680 --> 0:04:09.320 like perform. Like from what I understand, Leos are like performers, like. 0:04:09.320 --> 0:04:12.080 Oh yeah, charismatic, great with you know. 0:04:12.520 --> 0:04:14.400 And I'm not saying I don't know what happened, you know, 0:04:14.480 --> 0:04:16.320 but yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe something like that. 0:04:16.720 --> 0:04:18.680 So let me ask you a question, just a hypothetical question. 0:04:18.720 --> 0:04:20.640 So if I invite you to my birthday dinner on 0:04:20.680 --> 0:04:23.679 August ninth, and you came to my birthday diner. 0:04:23.560 --> 0:04:25.560 Actually showing the date out so she gets to you 0:04:25.560 --> 0:04:25.960 a gift. 0:04:26.320 --> 0:04:28.800 Go on, I'm just saying that if she came to 0:04:28.800 --> 0:04:31.600 my birthday in August ninth, mm hmm, because we became 0:04:31.640 --> 0:04:33.600 a really good friends between now in August ninth, because 0:04:33.600 --> 0:04:35.720 that's when you'd be invited to my birthday dinner. And 0:04:35.839 --> 0:04:38.200 let's just say that there was a tradition of going 0:04:38.240 --> 0:04:41.320 around the table and each person had to say what 0:04:41.400 --> 0:04:42.440 they loved about me the most. 0:04:42.440 --> 0:04:45.159 Would that be weird to you? Or feel right on? 0:04:45.760 --> 0:04:47.720 Are you the one initiating it? Or does something? 0:04:48.440 --> 0:04:50.960 Yes, yes she is. Why does this matter? 0:04:51.520 --> 0:04:53.960 If a Lee show was like, let's go around everyone 0:04:54.000 --> 0:04:57.080 and say what we love about Jesa. But if you 0:04:57.120 --> 0:04:58.680 were like, hey, guys, guys, guys, let's all go around 0:04:58.680 --> 0:05:00.880 and say what you love about it, that'd be a 0:05:00.920 --> 0:05:01.520 little trick. 0:05:02.200 --> 0:05:03.800 Great, Well, now I have a new I have a 0:05:03.839 --> 0:05:05.080 new strategy for this year. 0:05:05.480 --> 0:05:08.320 Here's the thing. Okay, I like a better do you 0:05:08.360 --> 0:05:11.919 do that every year? I think the better way to 0:05:12.000 --> 0:05:14.159 do it so that people aren't, you know, full of 0:05:14.200 --> 0:05:15.880 shit is I'd have them write it down. 0:05:18.040 --> 0:05:20.320 You have to come with a written note, no, you 0:05:20.600 --> 0:05:21.640 like piece. 0:05:21.440 --> 0:05:23.600 Of the paper and they write it down and then 0:05:23.800 --> 0:05:24.240 or whatever. 0:05:24.360 --> 0:05:26.760 All of this makes Camilla question her friendship with me. 0:05:26.920 --> 0:05:29.120 I can't when I explained. 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:31.520 What I like out of a birthday and I actually 0:05:31.560 --> 0:05:32.760 don't expect anything. 0:05:33.040 --> 0:05:35.320 No, no, no, hang on, let me just explain to Whitney. 0:05:35.600 --> 0:05:39.120 She used to send people a gift registry list. 0:05:39.080 --> 0:05:40.000 For her own birthday. 0:05:40.640 --> 0:05:41.200 That's sick. 0:05:41.640 --> 0:05:44.680 By the way, bud Way, thank you, thank you, I 0:05:44.760 --> 0:05:47.679 mean thank you, but like, no, thank you next. 0:05:48.040 --> 0:05:50.160 And I shouldn't be like this. I don't think i'd care. Now. 0:05:50.520 --> 0:05:52.760 I got a friend of mine deb won't say her 0:05:52.839 --> 0:05:56.080 last name for her wedding registry. I got her a 0:05:56.120 --> 0:05:57.560 couple of things, and then friends of mine we all 0:05:57.600 --> 0:05:59.040 were like, oh, let's all get her the plates and 0:05:59.080 --> 0:06:01.400 the forks and you know, to together. Yeah. And then 0:06:01.440 --> 0:06:02.720 I go to her house for dinner party and like, 0:06:02.720 --> 0:06:04.720 I kind of expect like the plants to be you 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:06.440 know what I mean. You kind of want to see 0:06:06.440 --> 0:06:09.520 your gift in action, you know. And I remember being like, 0:06:09.560 --> 0:06:11.279 where are those plates? And she goes, oh, I returned 0:06:11.279 --> 0:06:16.120 them off for a mattress. Oh she should be able 0:06:16.200 --> 0:06:17.960 to do you just be able to do whatever you want. 0:06:18.080 --> 0:06:20.080 But it was just kind of like, I like someone 0:06:20.160 --> 0:06:22.080 just telling me what they want. I appreciate that, I 0:06:22.080 --> 0:06:24.360 don't want to it gets you something you already. 0:06:24.080 --> 0:06:26.080 Have or like fucking dish dub. 0:06:26.440 --> 0:06:28.760 Also, sometimes when people give you presents that you didn't 0:06:28.800 --> 0:06:31.919 specifically request, it can be very insulting, like I. 0:06:31.960 --> 0:06:36.520 Agree, you know, it'll be like what kind of I'm interested? 0:06:36.680 --> 0:06:37.440 What kind of birthday? 0:06:37.480 --> 0:06:37.600 Mom? 0:06:37.640 --> 0:06:38.400 Do you think you're going to be? 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:40.600 So he's getting bigger, are you going to do like 0:06:40.640 --> 0:06:44.320 the Kardashian like the balloons, with the you know, with 0:06:44.480 --> 0:06:46.680 the circus and the bask What. 0:06:46.720 --> 0:06:48.720 Are you feeling is going to be your birthday mom? 0:06:48.839 --> 0:06:49.119 Vibe? 0:06:49.360 --> 0:06:50.040 Is that what they do? 0:06:50.560 --> 0:06:50.680 Oh? 0:06:50.760 --> 0:06:53.440 People here in La Yeah, of course no. 0:06:53.600 --> 0:06:56.600 They go straight to the event planner and they make 0:06:56.680 --> 0:06:59.760 sure that they have a bang in first, second, third, 0:07:00.160 --> 0:07:00.479 all the. 0:07:00.480 --> 0:07:01.000 Way on up. 0:07:01.640 --> 0:07:02.320 But who's it for? 0:07:03.520 --> 0:07:05.760 It for the attendees? Is it for the gram? 0:07:06.200 --> 0:07:09.080 Is it really for the kid that's unknowns? 0:07:09.200 --> 0:07:09.760 Yeah, we don't know. 0:07:10.160 --> 0:07:11.600 I think it's probably Cayse. 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:14.080 Specific right the photos to show the kid later? 0:07:14.640 --> 0:07:19.680 Oh yeah, yeah yeah. I had one real banger and 0:07:19.800 --> 0:07:20.800 it was Eve's fifth. 0:07:22.280 --> 0:07:24.680 How banging was it so, like I said, I was. 0:07:24.800 --> 0:07:27.400 Just reaching into the recesses of the memo. 0:07:27.720 --> 0:07:29.160 So when you say, like was it for the kid? 0:07:29.320 --> 0:07:29.720 Was it for you? 0:07:30.360 --> 0:07:33.200 I wasn't big on Instagram and I don't. I'm not 0:07:33.480 --> 0:07:36.160 big on Instagram for like super super personal stuff. I mean, 0:07:36.200 --> 0:07:37.960 I think that there's a whole world to share, but 0:07:38.080 --> 0:07:41.200 I don't. That's not been where I've done it. But 0:07:41.320 --> 0:07:42.360 I think that I did. 0:07:42.480 --> 0:07:43.840 When you just said that out loud, I think I 0:07:43.960 --> 0:07:45.720 did enjoy by five. 0:07:46.200 --> 0:07:48.360 No, they're there like yeah, but I think it. 0:07:48.480 --> 0:07:50.720 I mean for sure. I mean I would say absolutely 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:53.200 it was for her, mostly because the entire thing was 0:07:53.320 --> 0:07:54.680 all her favorite things. 0:07:55.080 --> 0:07:55.600 But I done it. 0:07:55.760 --> 0:07:57.520 But then I started because it is it all down? 0:07:57.840 --> 0:08:01.480 Like once you set the bar like is six, if 0:08:01.520 --> 0:08:03.360 you're not going to do it, is it then? Like well, 0:08:03.360 --> 0:08:04.200 where's all the shit? 0:08:04.600 --> 0:08:04.880 You mean? 0:08:05.000 --> 0:08:07.560 Like what what does Eve want now? For like her fourteen? 0:08:07.760 --> 0:08:10.720 It doesn't go Yes, That's the problem with kid's birthday 0:08:10.760 --> 0:08:13.760 parties is like once you're once you're like going all out. 0:08:13.880 --> 0:08:16.880 You kind of have to sustain it otherwise like where's 0:08:17.720 --> 0:08:18.440 where's the balloon? 0:08:19.480 --> 0:08:22.120 Or is it good to like prepare a kid for life? 0:08:22.160 --> 0:08:23.880 Like I'm like, yeah, last year I made a lot 0:08:23.920 --> 0:08:25.400 more money. We got to do that. This year we're 0:08:25.440 --> 0:08:25.720 doing the. 0:08:25.800 --> 0:08:26.320 Chuck e chee. 0:08:26.840 --> 0:08:31.080 How life is? I feel like I'm so different than 0:08:31.120 --> 0:08:32.960 every parent I talk to, or every parent maybe at 0:08:33.040 --> 0:08:35.280 least in like California or something, because I come from 0:08:35.360 --> 0:08:37.920 like the South, like white trash, hill billy shit, where 0:08:37.960 --> 0:08:40.520 it's like you're not friends with your kid. You love 0:08:40.559 --> 0:08:42.839 your kid more than anything, and like my job is 0:08:42.880 --> 0:08:45.599 to protect you. It's not to like necessarily, you know, 0:08:46.000 --> 0:08:49.760 be your homie. Like I'm fully you know, that's a 0:08:50.080 --> 0:08:53.040 kind of small thing. I don't. I see people whose 0:08:53.120 --> 0:08:55.599 kid calls them by their first name. I'm like, what 0:08:55.920 --> 0:08:58.040 is happening? What I don't know? 0:08:58.240 --> 0:09:00.679 It's wild. Oh they're like hey Kim. I'm like what 0:09:01.160 --> 0:09:01.920 Like stuff like that. 0:09:02.080 --> 0:09:05.040 I think for me, like if I've learned anything, maybe 0:09:05.080 --> 0:09:07.079 this's just because I came from like thank you so much, sir. 0:09:08.400 --> 0:09:11.959 I think because I came from such a raging alcoholics 0:09:12.000 --> 0:09:15.160 like like and the energy, Like I didn't care about 0:09:15.160 --> 0:09:17.160 the gifts or that anything, but like watching my mom 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:19.560 like stress out about like the day before Christmas wrapping 0:09:19.559 --> 0:09:20.839 a bunch of stuff, and like we have to do 0:09:20.920 --> 0:09:23.080 this because it's your birthday and just being like, oh god, 0:09:23.240 --> 0:09:26.400 like I think that if you had fun planning that 0:09:26.760 --> 0:09:31.160 amazing party, that's the best part. It's like I think that, like, yeah, 0:09:31.480 --> 0:09:33.679 we're for our kid, Yes, you know I did. 0:09:34.480 --> 0:09:35.800 I loved that birthday party. 0:09:36.040 --> 0:09:37.640 I figured out a way if you go to a 0:09:37.720 --> 0:09:40.040 kid's party and the mom's like the lady bugs aren't 0:09:40.080 --> 0:09:43.200 here yet, and like that kind of like now now 0:09:43.280 --> 0:09:45.280 you're just modeling for your kid that like a day 0:09:45.280 --> 0:09:48.719 that's insanity should be stressful, you know. So to me, 0:09:48.880 --> 0:09:51.480 like for the first birthday, I was really torn about 0:09:51.520 --> 0:09:53.959 what exactly to do, and because I was like I 0:09:53.960 --> 0:09:57.040 don't want to stress myself out and then not be present. 0:09:57.360 --> 0:09:59.400 You know, well, here's what I can tell you, because 0:09:59.480 --> 0:10:02.160 you're already this is going to be very simple. From 0:10:02.400 --> 0:10:05.559 you know, the ghosts of future of future with my 0:10:06.120 --> 0:10:06.800 older children. 0:10:06.880 --> 0:10:09.359 Now you're just gonna maybe. 0:10:09.760 --> 0:10:11.920 For your son this year for Christmas, like you know, 0:10:12.400 --> 0:10:14.599 wrap like a par of sunglasses. 0:10:15.880 --> 0:10:18.160 But also they're at the point where they like like 0:10:18.480 --> 0:10:19.760 wrapping in the box. 0:10:19.600 --> 0:10:22.080 Better than the thing that Yes, it's so true. 0:10:22.640 --> 0:10:24.680 I can just wrap up a bunch of empty Amazon 0:10:24.760 --> 0:10:27.400 boxes and he'll be happy, like to throw away and 0:10:27.480 --> 0:10:28.680 just try to get the boxes, give. 0:10:28.600 --> 0:10:29.720 Them a remote control. 0:10:29.960 --> 0:10:31.760 And he's like, if you're give him the TV remote, 0:10:31.800 --> 0:10:32.040 that's it. 0:10:32.400 --> 0:10:34.679 That's exactly it, you know. So I kind of that's 0:10:34.880 --> 0:10:36.880 the things that I'm kind of struggling with. Y'all can 0:10:36.960 --> 0:10:40.480 probably you will have like perfect advice and clarity on 0:10:40.679 --> 0:10:46.839 like the Santa Claus thing, like I have a and 0:10:46.880 --> 0:10:50.760 maybe this is a comedian thing, but like I were, 0:10:50.920 --> 0:10:53.760 I just and maybe this is just a perfectionism thing 0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:56.520 of like I was lied to so much as a kid. 0:10:56.600 --> 0:10:59.640 I'm like, do I say the tradition because I love Sanda, 0:10:59.640 --> 0:11:01.520 I love I love all this stuff, but like Easter 0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:02.520 Bunny Santa? 0:11:03.240 --> 0:11:04.880 Well, did you like Santa as a kid? 0:11:05.520 --> 0:11:08.920 No? I I had a very I was like, wait, 0:11:08.960 --> 0:11:10.680 we're not supposed to tart to strangers, but one. 0:11:10.600 --> 0:11:13.280 Is just sitting on the wrong Santa's lap many times. 0:11:13.520 --> 0:11:16.079 I don't even get started off feeling. Do you know 0:11:16.200 --> 0:11:18.719 that I found out you can google you can get 0:11:18.800 --> 0:11:20.839 the criminal records of the Santas in your area. 0:11:21.920 --> 0:11:23.520 My god, oh my god. 0:11:23.600 --> 0:11:24.480 What website is this. 0:11:25.120 --> 0:11:26.760 I'll send it to you. Someone just got it to 0:11:26.840 --> 0:11:29.080 me today. I will get it to you today. 0:11:29.160 --> 0:11:31.079 Don't they do some sort of wait, don't they do 0:11:31.200 --> 0:11:33.439 some sort of like checking of that. 0:11:34.240 --> 0:11:35.679 I think the mall you do. 0:11:35.760 --> 0:11:36.800 I think they just go for it. 0:11:37.600 --> 0:11:40.800 They're like, are you you've a beard? You're in Like, 0:11:40.880 --> 0:11:41.360 it's fine. 0:11:41.400 --> 0:11:43.079 I don't even think they need a beard. 0:11:43.440 --> 0:11:45.520 No, they're like, oh, you just got fired from NAMBLA, 0:11:45.679 --> 0:11:46.240 come work here. 0:11:46.840 --> 0:11:47.480 Whatever it is. 0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:50.439 I just I get I struggle a little bit with 0:11:50.520 --> 0:11:52.160 that because I also want to be the parent. It's like, 0:11:52.200 --> 0:11:54.000 I'm not going to do this tradition that everyone else does. 0:11:54.080 --> 0:11:56.480 And then the kid is like not able to you know, 0:11:56.720 --> 0:11:59.559 fit in or feel a part of something. But I 0:11:59.760 --> 0:12:02.559 I thought it was fishy. I didn't like it as 0:12:02.600 --> 0:12:02.880 a kid. 0:12:02.920 --> 0:12:07.160 I love Santa's big in our house, we're like full 0:12:07.520 --> 0:12:09.040 sand I've like still believe. 0:12:10.240 --> 0:12:11.400 I was gonna say, you're I'm. 0:12:11.280 --> 0:12:13.160 Not sure you're talking to the right person because I've 0:12:14.040 --> 0:12:16.880 questioned our lying to children before and she's like, what lie? 0:12:17.440 --> 0:12:18.319 But do you just does it? 0:12:18.480 --> 0:12:19.920 Just go? Because I think I'm also doing the thing 0:12:19.920 --> 0:12:21.480 where like my kid's not going to see a screen 0:12:21.559 --> 0:12:23.719 until they're fifteen. A couple of weeks and you're like 0:12:24.640 --> 0:12:24.920 it might be. 0:12:24.960 --> 0:12:28.400 A little of that. I'm just still in the like yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:12:28.480 --> 0:12:28.839 there you go. 0:12:29.160 --> 0:12:33.160 I think that it's so magical for them and I 0:12:33.320 --> 0:12:35.440 have really good memories and it's so magical for them, 0:12:35.440 --> 0:12:36.720 and they're so excited. 0:12:36.960 --> 0:12:39.439 Yeah yeah, I'm I'm really worried. There's a lot of things. 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:41.400 I'm just like, I guess I'm gonna trust my instincts 0:12:41.400 --> 0:12:43.599 and get there when I get there, you know. And 0:12:44.360 --> 0:12:46.600 I think that's been the biggest Like God, as soon 0:12:46.600 --> 0:12:48.679 as you become a mom, you start saying journey, like 0:12:48.760 --> 0:12:51.160 the biggest part of this whole, Like, journey is like 0:12:51.400 --> 0:12:54.559 feedback you get online or whatever it is, you know, 0:12:54.600 --> 0:12:57.199 people like, oh mom, Instagram is like brutal and like, 0:12:57.520 --> 0:12:59.120 you know me, I was like, you know, I went 0:12:59.200 --> 0:13:02.600 and so I posted a photo of me going into labor. 0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:04.920 I induced a week early. I really wanted to do 0:13:05.000 --> 0:13:08.319 it vaginally sea sectioned. I was so close to having 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:10.360 a sea section. If I do it again, I'll probably 0:13:10.400 --> 0:13:12.719 just schedule it like nothing. I just really want to 0:13:12.920 --> 0:13:14.280 try it that way. And I wanted to be able 0:13:14.320 --> 0:13:17.040 to get pregnant faster if I wanted to have another whatever, 0:13:17.480 --> 0:13:21.679 And so I like posted that and I got your 0:13:21.800 --> 0:13:26.000 sea section shaming you induced patas, and at first I 0:13:26.080 --> 0:13:29.079 was like, oh god, I should, but then I was like, 0:13:29.160 --> 0:13:33.000 you know what, this is awesome, Like these people they care, 0:13:33.280 --> 0:13:35.960 Like these people care about this baby they've never met. 0:13:36.080 --> 0:13:38.800 Like this is when women like you know. I mean, 0:13:38.800 --> 0:13:41.760 I was obviously super sensitive because you're, you know, eating 0:13:41.800 --> 0:13:44.599 postpartum depression and you're so emotional, and I'm like, just 0:13:44.679 --> 0:13:47.520 got cut two inches, I'm the healing from a surgery whatever. 0:13:47.960 --> 0:13:49.600 But I think that like for me, it's been really 0:13:50.600 --> 0:13:53.280 important to just be able to like take wisdom and 0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:56.000 not take it personally, like there's a lot I don't 0:13:56.040 --> 0:13:58.000 know and like, and also how to like take what 0:13:58.120 --> 0:13:59.559 you like and leave the rest. I've also gotten the 0:13:59.559 --> 0:14:02.120 most amazing advice from Instagram that I never would have 0:14:02.160 --> 0:14:04.000 thought of. Like people were like, make sure to put 0:14:04.040 --> 0:14:07.240 coconut oil or aqua four on your baby's butthole as 0:14:07.280 --> 0:14:08.959 soon as they come out because the first poop is 0:14:09.000 --> 0:14:11.680 really sticky. I'm like, yeah, like thank you. I really 0:14:11.760 --> 0:14:13.880 need to hear that, you know. So, I've sometimes gotten 0:14:13.920 --> 0:14:15.880 better advice from like women on TikTok or like an 0:14:15.920 --> 0:14:19.000 Instagram comments than doctor. You know. So I think that 0:14:19.080 --> 0:14:20.840 For me, it's just all about going like okay, okay, 0:14:20.960 --> 0:14:22.200 like nobody's wrong. 0:14:22.600 --> 0:14:24.840 You know, it's knowing when to shut it off too. 0:14:25.400 --> 0:14:27.080 Yeah, knowing like that might work. If you want a 0:14:27.080 --> 0:14:31.200 breastfeeda well he's twelve, that's your progative, that's your journey. 0:14:31.400 --> 0:14:31.960 Three months. 0:14:32.120 --> 0:14:34.160 I did as much as I could, you know, like, 0:14:35.160 --> 0:14:36.520 yeah I was a three month or two. 0:14:36.800 --> 0:14:38.040 I was a three months as much as I. 0:14:38.080 --> 0:14:40.560 Could, Like you know, when you tell yourself, like there's 0:14:40.560 --> 0:14:43.280 also a lot of literature that like microplastics are in 0:14:43.320 --> 0:14:45.520 breast milk now, so like oh, like it's just kind 0:14:45.560 --> 0:14:47.920 of figure out what works for you and what helps 0:14:47.960 --> 0:14:49.080 you be able to sleep in night, because I think 0:14:49.120 --> 0:14:53.120 being calm around your child and you know, is thing 0:14:53.240 --> 0:14:56.240 for them. At this point, I was formula fed Similac 0:14:56.400 --> 0:14:58.600 like forty years ago. There's pictures of me and drawers. 0:14:58.840 --> 0:15:01.680 I slept in a drawer. Yeah, I'm from Missouri. 0:15:02.280 --> 0:15:03.200 They're fine, the kids. 0:15:03.400 --> 0:15:06.240 I was given tea because I'm from England, Whitney, even 0:15:06.240 --> 0:15:08.240 though I've lost my accent, and I have pictures of 0:15:08.320 --> 0:15:13.120 me drinking a bottle tea with milk caffeinated at like one. 0:15:13.840 --> 0:15:15.680 Well, and also what was the what did grandma give 0:15:15.680 --> 0:15:17.800 you whiskey? Just give me a little whiskey now and 0:15:17.840 --> 0:15:33.920 then ski. Well, so you're ahead of it, you already 0:15:33.960 --> 0:15:34.680 know all the things. 0:15:35.000 --> 0:15:37.200 No, no, I'm his latest. You know, I have no 0:15:37.280 --> 0:15:38.800 idea what I'm doing, you know. But I think also 0:15:38.880 --> 0:15:40.000 like you know, but. 0:15:40.080 --> 0:15:41.920 You're curious, and I think that that's the thing. I 0:15:42.000 --> 0:15:44.720 think that been parenting. I think whether it's when they're 0:15:44.800 --> 0:15:47.560 pre verbal or when they're giving you a real run 0:15:47.600 --> 0:15:50.000 for your money, because wow, that whole like little kids, 0:15:50.040 --> 0:15:53.400 little problems, big kids, big problems. That's true, and I 0:15:53.520 --> 0:15:56.200 think I actually, speaking of comedians. 0:15:55.680 --> 0:15:58.480 I was wait, little kids, little problems. 0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:02.120 Big kids? Just say that? Why because I'm. 0:16:02.000 --> 0:16:05.800 Seriously because the problems feel so big because. 0:16:05.560 --> 0:16:07.840 She wants to think this is the hard part. I'm 0:16:07.840 --> 0:16:10.360 a four and a six year seven year old. Those 0:16:10.400 --> 0:16:10.880 are small. 0:16:11.000 --> 0:16:12.920 I'm gonna lose my goddamn mind. 0:16:13.720 --> 0:16:16.080 I think though they say like ten years is when 0:16:16.120 --> 0:16:17.160 you have the most impact. 0:16:17.280 --> 0:16:20.200 After that, thank God, because I'm gonna be mad because 0:16:20.440 --> 0:16:24.680 you know, it's pre adolescence because neurobiologically is when they're 0:16:24.720 --> 0:16:27.520 then needing to be okay on their own, because if 0:16:27.520 --> 0:16:28.440 they're not okay, on their own. 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:31.520 What's gonna happen then? Right, So you've got until then and. 0:16:31.640 --> 0:16:34.200 They love and they have to start. I is called 0:16:34.400 --> 0:16:39.680 identity differentiation, individuation, individuation. And I don't mean to name drop, 0:16:39.800 --> 0:16:42.400 but I was on a going somewhere for like a 0:16:42.440 --> 0:16:45.840