Speaker 1: Hi, and welcome to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2: It's hard to avoid the election.
Speaker 1: I'm super in it like many of you, and I
Speaker 1: try to keep politics out of this show, but obviously
Speaker 1: it seeps in from time to time, and a few
Speaker 1: days before major presidential election is just that kind of time.
Speaker 2: I'm already hearing.
Speaker 1: From people who are saying that their relationships, their friendships,
Speaker 1: their family connections are getting strained.
Speaker 2: Because of the election.
Speaker 1: On News Nation the other night, jd Vance said, if
Speaker 1: you're discarding a lifelong friendship because somebody is voting for
Speaker 1: the other team, then you've made a terrible, terrible mistake
Speaker 1: and you should do something different. Don't cast aside family
Speaker 1: members and lifelong friendships. Politics is not worth it. I
Speaker 1: love that he said that, especially because he's on the
Speaker 1: ticket obviously and should want people to care more about
Speaker 1: voting for him than their friendships. It was nice of
Speaker 1: him to say that. But I'm not going where you
Speaker 1: think I'm going with all this. Yes, I think you
Speaker 1: should keep politics separate from your friends and family. People
Speaker 1: who love you can disagree with you have different values
Speaker 1: than you all of it. I'm very kombayah about the
Speaker 1: whole thing. Really, I have friends who I love who
Speaker 1: are firmly on the left. I don't have any leftist family,
Speaker 1: but that's.
Speaker 2: Really just sheer luck.
Speaker 1: Ha ha. What I want to say, though, is that we've
Speaker 1: been talking on the show about making friends in adulthood,
Speaker 1: and I actually think it's completely okay to not pursue
Speaker 1: friendship with people on the opposite political side. I know
Speaker 1: it doesn't make sense that I would say that, because
Speaker 1: I just said I have lots of friends on the left,
Speaker 1: So why am I dissuading you from friend making.
Speaker 2: Across political lines?
Speaker 1: And look, if you meet someone, you're playing tennis with them,
Speaker 1: you meet them at work, whatever, you hit it off,
Speaker 1: and they have opposite politics but you like each other.
Speaker 2: Of course, go for it friends.
Speaker 1: But friendships in adulthood usually take more work than this.
Speaker 1: So if you meet someone and before you really know
Speaker 1: if they're funny, or if you have things in common
Speaker 1: or any of that, you find out you're not politically aligned,
Speaker 1: I think it's fine to say, eh, not going to
Speaker 1: pursue this friendship, especially if your political ideals do really
Speaker 1: matter to you. Plenty of people are mostly apolitical, so
Speaker 1: if that's you, great but if your politics do matter
Speaker 1: to you, I say keep the old friends with whom
Speaker 1: you're not politically aligned, But no need to be in
Speaker 1: any big rush to make more of these. As you
Speaker 1: get older, it's hard to maintain friendships. And I said
Speaker 1: in a previous episode that things like hobbies might not
Speaker 1: actually matter in new friendships as much as we think,
Speaker 1: but values and outlook they might matter a lot more. Again,
Speaker 1: to me, I find humor to be top of the list,
Speaker 1: like our are we laughing at the same stuff? Can
Speaker 1: we make each other laugh? That matters to me. So
Speaker 1: if I meet a super leftist, I find them really
Speaker 1: funny and we have amazing banter like that's to me
Speaker 1: as a friend, But a relationship that I have to
Speaker 1: work at and we don't have ideals in common. Tougher Again,
Speaker 1: you meet somebody at work, you crack up all through
Speaker 1: lunch and then she's voting for Kamala and you're voting
Speaker 1: for Trump. But doesn't mean you can't be friends. You're
Speaker 1: already pick her in grown up friendships. Give yourself permission
Speaker 1: to sort by politics too. That's all I'm saying. Don't
Speaker 1: discard people like JD Van said, but having similar lifestyles
Speaker 1: to new friends that you make as a grown up
Speaker 1: will go a long way into turning them into old friends.
Speaker 1: If you've got thoughts on this, drop me an email
Speaker 1: Carol Markowitz Show at gmail dot com. K A R
Speaker 1: O L M A R K O W I c
Speaker 1: AS and Charlie z Is and z B Show at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com. Coming up next and interview with Alan Covert.
Speaker 1: Join us after the break. Welcome back to the Carol
Speaker 1: Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio. My guest today is Alan Covert.
Speaker 1: Alan is an actor producer. You've seen him in all
Speaker 1: the Adam Sandler movies, Happy Gilmore, the wedding singer, Little Nikki,
Speaker 1: all of them. And he's also the star of the
Speaker 1: cult classic where I first saw him, Grandma's Boy.
Speaker 2: Hi, Alan, So nice to have you on.
Speaker 3: Hey, Carol, thanks for having me.
Speaker 1: I was thinking about this this is I've had a
Speaker 1: lot of well known guests on the show, but you
Speaker 1: are the guest.
Speaker 2: That I cannot wait for like my group of.
Speaker 1: Like non political, non twitter nerd friends, like my real
Speaker 1: crew of friends.
Speaker 2: To see this, and they're gonna be like you had
Speaker 2: Grandma's Boy on. It's going to be a very exciting moment.
Speaker 3: Well, thank you. I mean, you know at cult. Look,
Speaker 3: I'll take the cult.
Speaker 2: Oh for sure.
Speaker 3: I don't need to be that famous. It's too much
Speaker 3: of an infringement on your life.
Speaker 2: I like, are we not supposed to drink the kool
Speaker 2: aid during the movie? Because I thought that's what?
Speaker 3: Oh no, no, no. I'm like the cult thing because
Speaker 3: you know, it's small enough and rabid enough that I can, like,
Speaker 3: you know, get a good seat at a restaurant if
Speaker 3: there's a big line in the hosts, but not enough
Speaker 3: to where like people bother me non stop. I've been
Speaker 3: around people like that. Yeah right, I've spent a good
Speaker 3: chunk of my life around people who can't go to
Speaker 3: the mall. And I like going to the mall. But yeah,
Speaker 3: but it's I'm glad people like it, and it's always
Speaker 3: fun to have people mention it to me.
Speaker 1: So I did some research on you before the show.
Speaker 1: Learned a lot of things I didn't know. You were
Speaker 1: born in Florida.
Speaker 3: Yes, sported rays. Actually I didn't grow up on pum
Speaker 3: Beach where Mark Lago is. I grew up where the
Speaker 3: people who had jobs live. As if my dad had
Speaker 3: a job.
Speaker 2: Most poor people yeah, but.
Speaker 3: I knew a lot of people who lived on Palm Beach.
Speaker 3: You know, it's it's a funny town. Uh so, But
Speaker 3: I remember when Marlago was empty. That kid was an
Speaker 3: abandoned mansion and no one lived there. And then Trump
Speaker 3: bought it. He bought it after I had moved and stuff.
Speaker 3: But yeah, I grew up in South Florida.
Speaker 2: I love Palm Beach.
Speaker 1: I you know a lot of people compared to like
Speaker 1: other rich you know enclaves like the Hampton's or whatever.
Speaker 2: But Palm Beach is so colorful and unusual. I just
Speaker 2: I love it there.
Speaker 1: I mean, if if funny were no object, I'd live
Speaker 1: on the island.
Speaker 3: A friend of mine from high school had hit it
Speaker 3: big and he's got a house a block off the
Speaker 3: beach about Worth End.
Speaker 2: I didn't even mind, like three blocks off the beach.
Speaker 3: I'll take it. But it's like he bought that not
Speaker 3: because he cares about living on Palm Beach, but because
Speaker 3: the there is it's a public beach. But to actually
Speaker 3: get there, you'd have to walk like five miles and
Speaker 3: there's nowhere to park, and yeah, they know what they're
Speaker 3: doing over there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so how did you get into acting. What's your
Speaker 2: path here?
Speaker 3: It was something I always wanted to do. As a kid,
Speaker 3: I did plays, and it's just always fascinated by movies.
Speaker 3: I mean, I was telling someone yesterday, we were talking
Speaker 3: about old movies that we saw in the theaters, because
Speaker 3: that's part of my home thing I'm trying to do,
Speaker 3: which we'll get to eventually, gotta. I remember like just
Speaker 3: riding my bike to the movie theater alone to see
Speaker 3: a matinee of Young Frank and stuff. You know, I
Speaker 3: remember running home to get home in time to watch.
Speaker 3: I loved Lucy. I was just I loved comedy. I
Speaker 3: loved stand up comedy. I love cartoons that were funny.
Speaker 3: I loved anything that made me laugh. And you know,
Speaker 3: Jerry Lewis, buddy it just whoever was funny. I was
Speaker 3: just obsessed with and I don't know, but it was
Speaker 3: sunning because then when it came to like me doing it,
Speaker 3: I never thought I was funny. So I just wanted
Speaker 3: to be in movies. I wanted to be an actor,
Speaker 3: but then I was funny.
Speaker 1: Do people still try to be funny? I feel like
Speaker 1: a lot of funniness has been lost. Do you see
Speaker 1: that or do you still find funny around.
Speaker 3: There's so much funny a round. Yeah, but right now
Speaker 3: it's pretty right now, it's pretty much in the stand
Speaker 3: up realm and in the podcast and independent realm. Look,
Speaker 3: some of the funniest people I've read are on Twitter.
Speaker 2: Right, so you enjoy the Twitter?
Speaker 3: Any of them? Three year Wetterman, Oh nobody.
Speaker 2: I love three year Letterman so good.
Speaker 3: And I just go, wow, you're a great writer. Yeah,
Speaker 3: they're iowaha.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, so's the.
Speaker 3: You know, autism of the cars where he can literally
Speaker 3: see a fender and be like nineteen twelve Henry Ford's
Speaker 3: personal you know, I mean I knew the guy free Twitter. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I don't know him, but I mean, h and I
Speaker 3: remember I think he was the one who did Zark
Speaker 3: Carwe's Mom's letter or letter to the press or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a lot of funny on Twitter.
Speaker 3: Actually, went so many funny people out there, and people
Speaker 3: are dying to be funny. And one of the reasons.
Speaker 3: One of my big things in life right now at
Speaker 3: this moment. Look, I worked at Happy Madison before it
Speaker 3: was Happy Matts.
Speaker 2: That's Adam Sandler's that's.
Speaker 3: Adam Sales coming production company. Basically the people who there
Speaker 3: from the beginning. We were all in college together, and
Speaker 3: then after the movie started it and then Happy Madison
Speaker 3: got formed. But I mean we were involved all the
Speaker 3: way through.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and they were okay.
Speaker 1: They're all okay with like you being an outspoken conservative
Speaker 1: on Twitter.
Speaker 2: That's well.
Speaker 3: You know, there was a period of my life where
Speaker 3: I didn't go as nuts on Twitter because I knew
Speaker 3: that I that I represented Adam in the company, and
Speaker 3: so I tried to be as respectful to him in
Speaker 3: the company as I could. Uh, you know, at the
Speaker 3: end of the day, I'm an adult, but I also
Speaker 3: understand that I'm associated with a brand that you know,
Speaker 3: it's not my position to go out there, so I
Speaker 3: would try to keep things, you know, look like what sorry.
Speaker 2: Right, arguments are fun?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I have now that because what happened was just
Speaker 3: not to but to kind of get to what I'm
Speaker 3: trying to explain to you is that three years ago
Speaker 3: I had to take time off to deal with some
Speaker 3: family issues. I thought it was only gonna be a
Speaker 3: little bit and we here are. We were here three
Speaker 3: years later, and I think it's time for me to
Speaker 3: get back to work. I think I'm Kate, I think
Speaker 3: that the situation I was dealing with is almost done
Speaker 3: and I'd like to get back to work. Earlier, about
Speaker 3: a year ago, I thought I was getting ready and
Speaker 3: I let Adam know that that I was going to
Speaker 3: be leaving the company just because I'm I turned sixty
Speaker 3: the other day, and so I was just like.
Speaker 2: While you really you do not look sixty.
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm look eighty.
Speaker 2: But the people watching this on video will know.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, but we'll get it. I know I have
Speaker 3: like two overnight bags. I take my own luggage with me.
Speaker 3: But so I I said to him, my go look,
Speaker 3: I said, I just I want to do something. I
Speaker 3: just want to do something. I was like, I did
Speaker 3: everything that was on my list of things. I said,
Speaker 3: So now I got a new list of things, and
Speaker 3: that involves I want to I just want to make
Speaker 3: R rated comedies and bring them back to theaters. Yes,
Speaker 3: that's it, that's amazing. And here's why this to me,
Speaker 3: this is important. It thought, just he I want to
Speaker 3: be dub and make money.
Speaker 2: Making money?
Speaker 1: Is that bad?
Speaker 3: I have no fublem, But yes, I wouldn't think if.
Speaker 2: It comes with money, why not you know.
Speaker 3: Money, I wouldn't have been able to be in the
Speaker 3: position to take three years off to care for my family, right,
Speaker 3: I'm very eager to prop it off of my work, sure, sir.
Speaker 3: And so that's my whole goal. And it's because my
Speaker 3: daughter graduated high school this year. She's a film nerd.
Speaker 3: Her friends are film nerds. They do not have a
Speaker 3: single movie to call their own from her. I had ten, Yeah,
Speaker 3: I had.
Speaker 1: So that's really what I was asking was that nothing
Speaker 1: seems like the funny.
Speaker 2: Kind of our radar.
Speaker 3: Actors are riddy, Yeah, directors already. The studios are stupid.
Speaker 3: I are.
Speaker 2: I'm clear that hurdle.
Speaker 3: That's why I'm here talking to you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, I love it.
Speaker 3: Any billionaires listening, Yes, we have, Holly would. There's always
Speaker 3: money and disruption, guys, Hollywood's broken distribution is broken. I
Speaker 3: know a lot of Look, I've been out here for
Speaker 3: thirty five forty years making movies, thankfully and luckily I
Speaker 3: know a lot of the people who run the studios,
Speaker 3: just because I've been out here so damn long. Right,
Speaker 3: you know the guy like one of the you know,
Speaker 3: you meet a guy who's someone's assistant. Twenty five years later.
Speaker 2: They Haney Wall Show yeah, and you know, and these.
Speaker 3: Are people who came out here to make movies and
Speaker 3: they get it. But there's this whole generation under them
Speaker 3: that's making the decisions of what scripts get through the filter. Right,
Speaker 3: have a clue, what's fun? Yeah?
Speaker 2: That filter is holding up everything.
Speaker 3: Well, it's sad because look, I'll tell you this, This
Speaker 3: isn't me. Everyone knows how I feel about things. My
Speaker 3: daughter's friends are very artsy high school. They're begging for
Speaker 3: already comedies. Right, These are not maga kids.
Speaker 2: Yeah, let me think it's funny.
Speaker 3: A lot more conservative than people would think they are,
Speaker 3: because the things they are conservative about are the things
Speaker 3: that they're pushing back against that they feel are being
Speaker 3: shoved out in their throats. Because these kids, who all
Speaker 3: want to be filmmakers, they all watched Granmar's Boy a
Speaker 3: few Oh yeah, it was the first time my daughter
Speaker 3: had seen it. Oh wow, she's on the state team.
Speaker 2: I thought it like played on like on loop in
Speaker 2: your house.
Speaker 3: Oh god, my son is like, why do I watch
Speaker 3: any of your movies?
Speaker 2: He told your son?
Speaker 3: Okay, so I'm just getting them through the Happy gil Mores. Yes,
Speaker 3: with water boys. I would't even let them watch Billy Madison.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I mean I think, yeah, I'm almost ready
Speaker 1: for my kids to see Billy Madison. I remember laughing
Speaker 1: my face off at Billy Madison. That was in college
Speaker 1: when it came out, and just like my best friend
Speaker 1: and I just doubled over in pain.
Speaker 2: Laughing in the movie theater.
Speaker 1: And I just that's what I mean when I say
Speaker 1: I don't think things are funny, because I can't imagine
Speaker 1: that seeing a movie that I would find that funny today.
Speaker 2: I just I can't even remember the last movie I
Speaker 2: saw like that.
Speaker 3: May look and I but I've seen I've seen stand.
Speaker 2: Up guys, Yeah, stand up in a good place.
Speaker 3: Script I have scripts.
Speaker 1: Right, Well, stand up is I think harder, harder to
Speaker 1: cancel because it's one guy and it's like or girl,
Speaker 1: and you're either laughing or you're not.
Speaker 3: Like movies, I'm gonna I'll go do an arena to weeks.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, exactly.
Speaker 1: But movies you have the gatekeeper and you have the
Speaker 1: people who put it through the filter. So I just
Speaker 1: and none of it's and not just movies, but TV
Speaker 1: shows or late night shows, like my god, these late
Speaker 1: night hosts are.
Speaker 2: Not just not funny but like unfunny, deeply, deeply unfunny.
Speaker 2: They're angry and they're not at all humor at his
Speaker 2: And yeah, I've known the Jimmies, both of them, huh.
Speaker 3: I've known both of them for thirty five years. Tweet.
Speaker 3: I met Jimmy Fallon when we were shooting The Wedding Singer,
Speaker 3: and he was a stand up comic who had been
Speaker 3: in town about two weeks. These guys are funny guys.
Speaker 2: So what happened to them? Why are they not funny anymore?
Speaker 3: It depends on what you watch. I mean they're we're
Speaker 3: both I mean they both still do things that make
Speaker 3: me laugh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Jimmy Kimmel completely to me funny, come to.
Speaker 3: And it's part of the problem with Hollywood. Look, I
Speaker 3: love Jimmy Kimmel. If I called Jimmy Kimmel and said
Speaker 3: I need you to come be in this movie today,
Speaker 3: he'd probably do it. He's always like friendly and sweet
Speaker 3: and so nice. And you know, I don't agree with
Speaker 3: his politics. Look, his old partner Adam Carolla doesn't really
Speaker 3: with his right. Yeah, I just think that like when
Speaker 3: when you're supposed to appeal to everyone and you make
Speaker 3: a concerted effort to go after one person insess me relentlessly. Well,
Speaker 3: a lot of people obviously a lot of people still watch.
Speaker 2: But I wouldn't even care.
Speaker 1: I would not even care if it was going after
Speaker 1: one side, if it was funny, if he made me laugh,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't care if you attacking my politics, like it's
Speaker 1: just it's so, it's just political ranting.
Speaker 3: Like I said, Look, I love those two guys. I've
Speaker 3: known Val since he was a kid. I remember talking
Speaker 3: to him when he was nervous doing Saturday a lot.
Speaker 3: You know, he's a great impressionist, he's a great writer.
Speaker 3: He's really Look, you don't get to be that job
Speaker 3: unless you actually are charming and can appeal to people. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and uh, I just yeah, I think Jimmy was nice
Speaker 3: to Trump.
Speaker 2: Right, and then he had to apologize for that.
Speaker 1: Just got destroyed, Yeah, he cried in his apology.
Speaker 3: We a lot of people they look at their life
Speaker 3: getting destroyed and they get scared.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So when they ask you if you're not scared.
Speaker 3: Because I don't care, I mean I really just don't.
Speaker 2: I've had that not caring a little far, but a
Speaker 2: great life, you know, said, I've lit a great light.
Speaker 1: We're going to take a quick break and be right
Speaker 1: back on the Carol Marcowitch Show.
Speaker 3: You know, your first question was what do you worry about?
Speaker 2: Yeah, we go and get to that. What do you
Speaker 2: worry about?
Speaker 3: Alan only thing I worry about my kids, that's it. Yeah,
Speaker 3: that's it. But that involves so much, right, involves everything? Yeah,
Speaker 3: you know, but that's it. I don't care about my job.
Speaker 3: I'll go get another job. I'll find us to do.
Speaker 3: I'll be your co host.
Speaker 2: Yes, you'd be my co you know, I really.
Speaker 3: Don't care all those autographs that conventions every weekend to
Speaker 3: put over my kids head. All I care about is
Speaker 3: my kids, right, that's it. That's all I worry. I
Speaker 3: worry about their future. I worry about what they're being taught.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: My oldest daughter forced me to let her get vaccinated
Speaker 3: so she could go see Harry Styles at Madison's Square
Speaker 3: Garden and gets sick.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I feel guilty. No, really, it's because I get vaccinated
Speaker 3: and I worry about or constantly because of that. Yeah,
Speaker 3: because the other three.
Speaker 1: I was just like, no, right, if it makes you
Speaker 1: feel better, I think that the you know the time
Speaker 1: period has been long enough that.
Speaker 2: You know the problems would have potentially developed by now.
Speaker 2: So now, don't beat yourself up over it.
Speaker 1: But I also I vaccinated my oldest two with the
Speaker 1: pediatric vaccine to send them to sleep Away Cam And
Speaker 1: I you know, I'm like, why didn't I just spake
Speaker 1: a vaccine card like everybody else, what are they doing?
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, that's all I'm worried about. That's it my kids,
Speaker 3: their future, their health and you know, And but also
Speaker 3: this relates, like me wanting to do these R rated
Speaker 3: movies relates to that because here's my theory, mind, my
Speaker 3: theory in my stupid head of why I think this
Speaker 3: is important. These kids, I mean, all they do, all
Speaker 3: they hear all day is how horrible everything is. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and how they need to save the world because their
Speaker 3: parents let them down. I mean, pressure on these kids
Speaker 3: is insane. And I would really say, you're a kid,
Speaker 3: go out with your friends and do something stupid, Go
Speaker 3: go hike and find a dead body. I can stand
Speaker 3: by me. Yeah, I have a movie that I'm trying
Speaker 3: to get made in connection with Bill Burr's company called
Speaker 3: All Things Comedy. Look look at the Guy. Like Bill
Speaker 3: Burr is a lot of conservative, right, but if you
Speaker 3: heard left wing liberal you know, white women talk about it, right,
Speaker 3: Bill Burr's tromp. Yes, Bill Burr's not voting for Troup, right, and.
Speaker 2: He has some of the better jokes about the right.
Speaker 3: I think he's the reason Ilbur's jokes are funny about
Speaker 3: Trump is because they're funny, right, and he doesn't use
Speaker 3: them to try to make people hate m But I
Speaker 3: personally think I have a movie called Scavenger Hunt. It's
Speaker 3: the most simple movie there is. It's Scavenger Hunt, Senior Night,
Speaker 3: Scavenger Hunt, Lady School. That's it. Cars full of kids,
Speaker 3: you got the jocks, you got the nerds, you got
Speaker 3: the arts sees, you know, and all the chorus have titles.
Speaker 3: It's like, you know, great writers. I don't have their
Speaker 3: names in front of me, and I'm just clueless. But
Speaker 3: I mean, I let my daughter read this script and
Speaker 3: she goes, Wow, the dialogue's really good. It's not cringe.
Speaker 2: It's just for me, not cringe. That's the best complimented
Speaker 2: teenager could give you.
Speaker 3: Here. Here's what one of her friends, who I know
Speaker 3: for a fact is probably voting for Kablas, said to me.
Speaker 3: A guy, He's like, you need to make more funny movies.
Speaker 3: He said, uh, he said, all we ever get is
Speaker 3: literally he said this to me. He said, all we
Speaker 3: ever get is gender in suicide.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's all so dark. It's like they're supposed to
Speaker 2: be worried all the time.
Speaker 4: And it's just like I tell my son every day,
Speaker 4: I go, who cares you ten? Go play baseball as
Speaker 4: a google, plant the tree in the backyard and pretend
Speaker 4: you're a pirate. That's all I tell them all the time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but they get They just get this kind of
Speaker 1: pushed on them their whole lives. I mean, just the
Speaker 1: fact that we, for example, teach climate change starting in kindergarten, Like, why,
Speaker 1: even if you're a super pro climate change, you know,
Speaker 1: pro telling everybody about it, why start telling them in
Speaker 1: kindergarten that the world is in trouble.
Speaker 2: What is the kindergartener going to do for you? How
Speaker 2: are they going to help to solve this problem?
Speaker 3: I have one of these crazy memories, not like I'm
Speaker 3: a photographic, but I just like to no, trust me,
Speaker 3: if you had me read something, gave me quiz on it,
Speaker 3: I'd probably answer, well, but I just remember stuff for
Speaker 3: my life, and I know for a fact that one
Speaker 3: night I was watching All in the Family, which was
Speaker 3: one of my favorite shows ever. Well, I was I
Speaker 3: think nine, maybe my son's age ten, and it was
Speaker 3: the first time I'd ever heard about the ozone hole.
Speaker 3: Meathead was going off about how we were killing ourselves
Speaker 3: and that the ozone hole was going to kill us
Speaker 3: all right, like ten years. What year was that, Probably
Speaker 3: seventy seven, seventy six, maybe I don't know. I'd remember
Speaker 3: where we were. My dad was in law school, so
Speaker 3: I was definitely ten and under. But I just remember
Speaker 3: literally getting to knock in my stomach and getting scared.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it didn't help anything, right, You've being scared did
Speaker 1: not prove little in the O zone.
Speaker 3: I was watching an adult show, but I remember that fear. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I remember sitting here at sixty going, what happened with.
Speaker 2: We fixed it? We like patched it?
Speaker 3: Right? Oh, look at ares movie. Yeah, not one prediction
Speaker 3: in that movie came.
Speaker 1: Trip And you know it's not true because al Gore
Speaker 1: continued living however he wanted and didn't change any of
Speaker 1: your Yeah, right, So how concerned is he really?
Speaker 2: It's by the way, I wonder about that.
Speaker 3: Look I fly regular back in the day when I
Speaker 3: was going around with sailor a lot. I will tell
Speaker 3: you right now that there is no greater luxury on
Speaker 3: earth than flying.
Speaker 2: I've only done it twice in my life and it
Speaker 2: was magical. Magical. Yeah, Oh, it's so good. The car
Speaker 2: just meets you on the tarmac. I mean unfeatable.
Speaker 3: Today, Okay, I mean it's literally like the most like
Speaker 3: like the Pharaoh of Egypt did not live as well
Speaker 3: as that, not even close.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's amazing.
Speaker 3: I'm not going to sit here and tell other people
Speaker 3: you can't go on vacation.
Speaker 2: Right, I know we'll go on vacation.
Speaker 1: Just don't lecture me while you're flying on your private
Speaker 1: jet alone.
Speaker 2: Leonardo DiCaprio like a lot.
Speaker 3: Of others that I'm yeah right, and I mock them.
Speaker 3: By the way. Look, mostly a lot of people are friends.
Speaker 3: There's people out here that do horrible things that I'm
Speaker 3: not friends with. There's Hollywood is not It appears evil
Speaker 3: because the people who are evil seem to be the loudest.
Speaker 2: Right now, there's almost true for every everything.
Speaker 3: So many good people out here. But the but the
Speaker 3: problem is not so much evil. Is did he evil? Apparently?
Speaker 2: Yes, sounds like it Yeah, sounds like it.
Speaker 3: Yes, evidence pointing to it. Yes, is bob Iger evil?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 3: Is Bob Iger arrogant and deluded? Completely Wabiger thinks it's
Speaker 3: his job to mold the brains of America's youth to
Speaker 3: agree with what he agrees. That's right. I thinks that's
Speaker 3: the right thing, and.
Speaker 2: So is that. I don't know.
Speaker 3: You know, well, that's ship up. I agree, and to
Speaker 3: mock it ruthlessly. But you know what's great right now
Speaker 3: is uh uh Maya Rudolph and Dana Carvey on SNL. Yeah,
Speaker 3: Oh my god. He's doing the Biden they should have
Speaker 3: been doing for three and a half years, and she's
Speaker 3: doing the Kamla that they.
Speaker 2: Have to watch.
Speaker 3: It clicks, they get a couple of cold openings, and
Speaker 3: the reason they're good is because they're not doing it
Speaker 3: out of hate. Yeah, cure to you. Maya does not
Speaker 3: hate Kamila. Great. Of course, I don't know what Dana thinks,
Speaker 3: but his impression is not about a man he hates, right,
Speaker 3: He's doing an impression about a man he observes. And
Speaker 3: that's why guys like Shane Gillis and Bill Bill Burr
Speaker 3: and these guys can make jokes. People love Shane.
Speaker 2: Gillis, Yeah, I love Shane Gilloss Trump ruthless all the time. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but he does it in a.
Speaker 3: Way that you're that's like, not like this, matthe receival
Speaker 3: Man on Earth. It's like, listen funny this.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So what would you what advice would you give your
Speaker 1: sixteen year old self coming.
Speaker 3: Up in this avon TI. Honestly, like I said before,
Speaker 3: I've my life since sy from the time I was ten.
Speaker 3: I mean I've I've I'm a lucky man. I ended
Speaker 3: up in crazy places that I had no business being long.
Speaker 2: And some business no no, long.
Speaker 3: Before I was ever in a movie. I mean, I
Speaker 3: just was never afraid to go on adventures. I was
Speaker 3: never I don't know, I really was dumb and had
Speaker 3: no fear and I looked, you know, I don't want
Speaker 3: to be like some Oh, but I you know, look,
Speaker 3: I've been in and out of rehab. I was in
Speaker 3: a mental institution of a rehab where they blocked the
Speaker 3: doors every night. Uh. I hitchhiked across the country when
Speaker 3: I was eighteen. Wow, I mean I just was like,
Speaker 3: I did crazy stuff. I ended up and I just
Speaker 3: weaseled my way into some amazing adventures.
Speaker 2: And I think you're not giving yourself enough credit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe you've had some some setbacks in your life.
Speaker 2: But when I.
Speaker 1: Didn't weasel your way in you you watching.
Speaker 2: Talented your way in my way in you charmed.
Speaker 3: Maybe.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'll give you that.
Speaker 3: Every every mistake, I'm ended with the lesson nothing killed me.
Speaker 3: People were like, do you wish you'd never done drugs? No,
Speaker 3: because I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday
Speaker 3: who I've been friends with forty years, that I met
Speaker 3: in rehab, you know, and there's no time in my
Speaker 3: life when that's the only guy who understood what I
Speaker 3: was going through. He's amazing. I love him, and I
Speaker 3: would have. I have at least fifteen people in my
Speaker 3: life like that that. If I hadn't gone to a
Speaker 3: mental institution, I wouldn't know them. And we all laugh.
Speaker 3: We're like, we made it through. We were talking about
Speaker 3: that yesterday. He was like, you turned sixty. He goes
Speaker 3: a lot of people didn't think you'd make it to thirty.
Speaker 3: And so my advice to my sixteen year old self
Speaker 3: would just be, don't stray, just keep going, Just push
Speaker 3: on through. It's always going to have you know anything.
Speaker 3: I swear to God, I told my son this yesterday
Speaker 3: because he was upset about something, and I says, like, dude,
Speaker 3: anything that doesn't kill you is a funny story. Your
Speaker 3: leg hurts right now, I go next week you'll be
Speaker 3: telling it and it's a funny story, right, It's like,
Speaker 3: so just keep going. But yeah, that on to myself,
Speaker 3: you know, to my son, I'm like, he sure.
Speaker 2: Don't hurt your leg, it's not that funny.
Speaker 3: I always forget to give him his bike helmet though,
Speaker 3: Oh no really, people are like, he needs a bike helmet.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, well, I've loved this conversation. I just
Speaker 1: think you are hilarious, one of the best people ever.
Speaker 1: I will absolutely send this to all the billionaires I know,
Speaker 1: hopefully get.
Speaker 2: You some funding for that. What in our movie? That
Speaker 2: makes a lot of sense.
Speaker 3: I dollars, that's like, and I know how to market
Speaker 3: it where you don't have to spend money on TV.
Speaker 2: There you go.
Speaker 1: I feel like that that is an easy proposal for
Speaker 1: somebody to have.
Speaker 3: The gate keepers, let's get around them. Like, right, but
Speaker 3: podcasting didn't exist ten years ago, yeah, and now it's
Speaker 3: literally the biggest thing driving media today.
Speaker 2: I think it's going to make it.
Speaker 3: Let's find a way to do it. Yeah, thank you
Speaker 3: so much. I've always been and I I mean we've
Speaker 3: been mutuals on Twitter for how long?
Speaker 2: I mean a long time. Yeah. I have always loved
Speaker 2: following you. You're always again. I love the funny. Funny
Speaker 2: is most important to me.
Speaker 3: Oh, I get violet when I here's the listen. If
Speaker 3: you see me on Twitter going after someone, just remember this.
Speaker 3: I'm laughing because I quote from it.
Speaker 2: I know they're laughing, but you're laughing.
Speaker 3: I'm laughing. I live from a stand up point of view.
Speaker 3: If you're going to hackle me, I'm going to destroy it. Right.
Speaker 3: It's like I'm not over here, a you're over here
Speaker 3: going look at this idiot? What else can I?
Speaker 1: Well? And here with your best tip for my listeners
Speaker 1: on how they can improve their lives.
Speaker 3: Don't listen to the haters. I know it's hard and
Speaker 3: you don't have to be like supremely self confident, but
Speaker 3: they don't. They're jealous, they're they're full of hate, They're
Speaker 3: sad about their own lives. Don't don't let people look.
Speaker 3: I would equit. I would equit the movie business thirty
Speaker 3: five years ago. Because every movie I've ever made is
Speaker 3: one of the lowest rated movies of all time.
Speaker 2: I'm not joking, is that true?
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, how's that talk about?
Speaker 2: Find somebody hits?
Speaker 3: People are like got the rare zero and rotten tomatoes?
Speaker 3: I think I have three zero Grandma's Boys, I can eight?
Speaker 2: No really?
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, yeah yeah. Don't listen to the haters. They're stupid.
Speaker 3: Just enjoy your life, find find the things that makes
Speaker 3: you happy, and that's it. That's the only thing I
Speaker 3: can do.
Speaker 2: Love it.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for coming on, Ellen Alan Colbert,
Speaker 1: check him out.
Speaker 2: Give him funding for a funny movie. We really really
Speaker 2: need it.
Speaker 3: Awesome, Carol, thank you so much.
Speaker 1: Thanks so much for joining us on the Carol Marcowitch Show.
Speaker 2: Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.