1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:04,400 Speaker 1: iHeart podcasts bring you the ultimate summer of love tree. 2 00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:09,640 Speaker 2: This is Famously Available. Hi, it's Kathy Schwartz. 3 00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:12,120 Speaker 1: And I'm Deanna Stagliano and. 4 00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:15,040 Speaker 2: We are back with Famously Available and we are just 5 00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:18,400 Speaker 2: getting ready to dive back into all things about dating 6 00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:19,599 Speaker 2: with some more girl chat. 7 00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:21,319 Speaker 1: All right, So I know we're all going to be 8 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:23,760 Speaker 1: at jingle Ball. You're going to be there. You've had 9 00:00:23,760 --> 00:00:25,520 Speaker 1: the pleasure of already seeing me go on one date. 10 00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:29,960 Speaker 2: I got to tell you that looked so I'm I 11 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:32,840 Speaker 2: don't know even at my age. You put a man 12 00:00:32,840 --> 00:00:35,400 Speaker 2: in front of me and let me talk to him 13 00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:38,519 Speaker 2: for five minutes. When I see his eyes and his smile, 14 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:40,919 Speaker 2: I can tell you whether I'm interested in the second day. 15 00:00:41,720 --> 00:00:45,280 Speaker 2: That's how quickly I can do it. But it was 16 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:48,720 Speaker 2: painful to watch you because you clear in my mind 17 00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:51,480 Speaker 2: you clearly were not interested in that date that you had. 18 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:54,240 Speaker 1: Well, I won't I won't go back because we already 19 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:56,560 Speaker 1: did a podcast over that. But I think you're right, Kathy. 20 00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:58,520 Speaker 1: I think I realized pretty early on. It also was 21 00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:00,640 Speaker 1: a It was also was a weird scenario, you know 22 00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:02,160 Speaker 1: what I mean. It's not like it's like you go 23 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:03,800 Speaker 1: out to dinner with one guy and get to yeah, 24 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:05,760 Speaker 1: you know what I mean, different scenario, like all the 25 00:01:05,920 --> 00:01:08,920 Speaker 1: friends were there who were right, Which is why I'm 26 00:01:08,920 --> 00:01:14,040 Speaker 1: also I feel a little apprehensive now about bringing this 27 00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:17,520 Speaker 1: one because he's okay. No one on the podcast introduced 28 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:20,240 Speaker 1: me to him. He's somebody that I met myself. A 29 00:01:20,240 --> 00:01:22,520 Speaker 1: lot of our friends do not know that we have 30 00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:25,240 Speaker 1: been seeing each other. So then to bring him to 31 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:26,520 Speaker 1: such a public event. 32 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:28,480 Speaker 2: Well but it's well, it's not going to be. I 33 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:30,360 Speaker 2: don't think you and he would be on camera. I 34 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:32,920 Speaker 2: just had a brilliant idea. This is Kathy, this is 35 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 2: my min mind works. You bring him, and you bring him, 36 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:42,080 Speaker 2: and you know, we don't nobody don't know who he is. 37 00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:44,000 Speaker 2: We won't put one camera, we won't say his name. 38 00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:46,639 Speaker 2: And then they can reach out to the East Coast 39 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:50,080 Speaker 2: guy and ask him if he wants to come and 40 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,560 Speaker 2: have a second date with me, a third date I 41 00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:55,560 Speaker 2: guess would be and then if he isn't nice to me, 42 00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:56,920 Speaker 2: you all could torture him. 43 00:01:57,240 --> 00:01:59,520 Speaker 1: No, we're not bringing him back, Kathy, because you're worth 44 00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:02,240 Speaker 1: more than what he gave. You are worth more than 45 00:02:02,240 --> 00:02:03,920 Speaker 1: what he gave to you. We're not bringing him back. 46 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 1: I'm not even going to stand for it because now 47 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:08,079 Speaker 1: I have a tainted little taste in my mouth for him. 48 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 1: So we can't have him back. We need to set 49 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,280 Speaker 1: you up with someone fresh and new. 50 00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:15,160 Speaker 2: Are you? Have you been doing dating apps? 51 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,960 Speaker 1: I did dating apps, I guess about a year ago. 52 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,280 Speaker 1: I haven't been on them in over a year. Okay, 53 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:23,480 Speaker 1: it's a show, don't do it. 54 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:25,079 Speaker 2: Wait, wait, I have to tell you. I don't know 55 00:02:25,120 --> 00:02:28,520 Speaker 2: if you know this, but Joan and Susan and Nancy, 56 00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:31,519 Speaker 2: all from my season with Golden Bats for one, all 57 00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,399 Speaker 2: came to Austin like three weeks ago. 58 00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:34,120 Speaker 1: I saw. 59 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:37,120 Speaker 2: Okay, we had a blast. But one of the things, uh, 60 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:42,160 Speaker 2: Susan and Joan were harassing Nancy and me. You've got 61 00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:45,080 Speaker 2: to get on a dating site. I said, guys, it's brutal. 62 00:02:45,360 --> 00:02:48,880 Speaker 2: It is brutal, and Nancy's younger than I am, and 63 00:02:48,919 --> 00:02:52,000 Speaker 2: it's still brutal. So just you know, one too many 64 00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:54,639 Speaker 2: glasses of wine, and we said, we said uncle. We 65 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:56,880 Speaker 2: got on and then we spent the rest of night 66 00:02:57,000 --> 00:03:01,000 Speaker 2: going really all literally. We took turns holding up guys 67 00:03:01,320 --> 00:03:05,960 Speaker 2: pictures that were fifty pounds overweight, holding up dead fish 68 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:10,440 Speaker 2: with bear cans, ball caps backwards, you know, ridiculous, or 69 00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:12,120 Speaker 2: thirty year olds that said, hey, you know you do 70 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:13,880 Speaker 2: want to be my baby mama. I mean, it was 71 00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:17,480 Speaker 2: the whole thing. We died laughing. It is. So, I 72 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:21,120 Speaker 2: do not think that online dating works. 73 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:22,919 Speaker 1: So here's the thing. I did do it for a 74 00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:25,280 Speaker 1: period of time. I did go on a few dates. 75 00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:27,040 Speaker 1: One guy I dated off and on for about a 76 00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:29,160 Speaker 1: year and a half, off and on. Wow, I did 77 00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:31,480 Speaker 1: date another guy who I still keep in touch with 78 00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:36,200 Speaker 1: to this day, who's he's super nice. You know, Yeah, 79 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:38,680 Speaker 1: I think it can be good. But I am with you, Kathy, 80 00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:40,760 Speaker 1: where I would really like to meet someone the old 81 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:43,400 Speaker 1: fashioned way, And I would say in my age group 82 00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:47,119 Speaker 1: in particular, what I found from the dating apps were 83 00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:48,960 Speaker 1: just a bunch of men who wanted to have sex. 84 00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:51,840 Speaker 1: That's all it was. Yeah, men these days are so 85 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:56,800 Speaker 1: quick to send you pictures of their private parts they 86 00:03:56,880 --> 00:03:59,760 Speaker 1: fast forward, or you just get the ones who aren't 87 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:02,920 Speaker 1: real and just want to message you for a month 88 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:03,600 Speaker 1: on end. 89 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:06,000 Speaker 2: Well they really like you to send a check to 90 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:06,840 Speaker 2: them for you know. 91 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:09,280 Speaker 1: Right or that, or it's just some old man who's 92 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,520 Speaker 1: married at home at diaanes board, you know, what I mean. 93 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 2: You know, I'm ready for advice on this because honestly, 94 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:17,800 Speaker 2: I get out, I have friends, I got, I go 95 00:04:17,839 --> 00:04:21,080 Speaker 2: out for dinner, I go out to bars, I do. 96 00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:28,120 Speaker 2: I do a lot of dating. I'll give myself a 97 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:31,599 Speaker 2: lot of opportunities to date. But the thing where I 98 00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:35,600 Speaker 2: need help is how do you how do you meet 99 00:04:35,640 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 2: men organically? I think it's where you could give me 100 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:42,080 Speaker 2: some advice because you've been around. I mean I've been around, 101 00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:44,040 Speaker 2: but I've been married, you know, for a long time too. 102 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:46,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know, Kathy. I do believe that you 103 00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:49,680 Speaker 1: should give the dating apps a shot. I believe that 104 00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:52,800 Speaker 1: you are putting yourself out there. I also as cuckoo 105 00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:54,840 Speaker 1: as the sounds like, let everybody call it what it 106 00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,120 Speaker 1: is like. I believe we're all destined for a path, 107 00:04:57,360 --> 00:04:59,320 Speaker 1: and it may just not be in your path right now. Kathy, 108 00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:00,960 Speaker 1: you are meant for so something else. You are meant 109 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,920 Speaker 1: to do all of these things right you did, You 110 00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:05,520 Speaker 1: did the Gold Baster, then you did Paradise, now you're 111 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:08,800 Speaker 1: doing this podcast. You know what I mean? There could 112 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:10,719 Speaker 1: be a point in your life that you are destined 113 00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:13,479 Speaker 1: for more and you are not fully open into a 114 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:16,400 Speaker 1: space to have someone. I'm not God. I'm not going 115 00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:17,960 Speaker 1: to tell you what that is, but these are the 116 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:20,400 Speaker 1: things that go on in my twisted mind. Whatever my 117 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:21,880 Speaker 1: path is, I just want to be on that. 118 00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 2: Well, let me ask you, do you ever think I mean? 119 00:05:24,279 --> 00:05:26,119 Speaker 2: I will tell you the thought has crossed my mind 120 00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:30,080 Speaker 2: that I am. People always accuse me of being friends 121 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:33,440 Speaker 2: of friend zoning men. I don't think I do. But 122 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:38,720 Speaker 2: maybe maybe that's maybe that is my path. I don't know, 123 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:41,800 Speaker 2: but I know that where I was when I was 124 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,159 Speaker 2: your age and when I was in my thirties, I 125 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:47,839 Speaker 2: wanted that man twenty four to seven. That is something 126 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:51,279 Speaker 2: that I'm now thinking about. Do I want a man 127 00:05:51,640 --> 00:05:53,599 Speaker 2: twenty four to seven? Do I want a man to 128 00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,640 Speaker 2: live with me? Or do I like waking up and 129 00:05:55,680 --> 00:05:57,839 Speaker 2: reading my book in my bed sometimes till ten in 130 00:05:57,839 --> 00:06:00,200 Speaker 2: the morning, you know, or going to bed and I 131 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:02,600 Speaker 2: want to go to bed. But I do think it 132 00:06:02,760 --> 00:06:07,240 Speaker 2: our age, at my age, a relationship can look differently. 133 00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:09,120 Speaker 2: Do you feel like it ken at your age or not? 134 00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:12,960 Speaker 1: Absolutely? And I've shared this multiple multiple times on the podcast. 135 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,240 Speaker 1: Is that I A. I don't know. I definitely don't 136 00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:18,280 Speaker 1: want more children. B. I don't know that I want 137 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:21,159 Speaker 1: marriage and also seeing like I don't know that I 138 00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:22,640 Speaker 1: want to cohabitate. 139 00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:24,080 Speaker 2: With anyone permanently or at all. 140 00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:25,680 Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm really on the fence about that. 141 00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:30,360 Speaker 2: See I would cohabitate. I don't think I need to 142 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:33,160 Speaker 2: live with someone full time. Susan from our show, you 143 00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:36,480 Speaker 2: know she has a long distance boyfriend. I think that's 144 00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:38,240 Speaker 2: I don't think I could do that. Like, I know 145 00:06:38,360 --> 00:06:41,120 Speaker 2: the parameters that I have. I if I dated a 146 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:44,200 Speaker 2: guy that's in California, I would jump in that. I'm sorry, 147 00:06:44,240 --> 00:06:49,640 Speaker 2: I have to rewind my brain. Gary Teresa, Joan and 148 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:57,120 Speaker 2: Chalk and mel and Peg three couples who to this. 149 00:06:57,480 --> 00:07:00,280 Speaker 2: I mean one's divorced. But the issue is always around 150 00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:03,480 Speaker 2: living in the same town and moving, and I actually 151 00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:07,960 Speaker 2: don't have that issue. I would move wherever, and then 152 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:10,320 Speaker 2: I would come back, keep my home here and go 153 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:13,000 Speaker 2: back and forth. I think what I'm trying to say 154 00:07:13,040 --> 00:07:16,080 Speaker 2: is I am much more flexible now because I don't 155 00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:19,520 Speaker 2: have children at home like you do. I would think 156 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:22,840 Speaker 2: i'd be. But here's the rub. And I was talking 157 00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:26,280 Speaker 2: to my guy friend about this the other day. He said, well, 158 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:29,800 Speaker 2: maybe you're just looking for friends with benefits. I said no, no, no, 159 00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:33,160 Speaker 2: I want the commitment I want, but it doesn't mean 160 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:35,680 Speaker 2: I have to spend twenty four seven with you. It 161 00:07:35,720 --> 00:07:38,160 Speaker 2: doesn't mean I want you to live in Paris and 162 00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 2: I'm living in Texas. But I feel like I'm so 163 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:49,000 Speaker 2: open to an evolved relationship because my kids are grown, 164 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:52,000 Speaker 2: because I'm retired, and I don't know if you're in 165 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:54,960 Speaker 2: that space or not. Well, obviously you're not tired. I'm saying, 166 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:57,040 Speaker 2: I don't know if you're in the space of looking 167 00:07:57,080 --> 00:08:00,720 Speaker 2: at a relationship differently than you marriage. 168 00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:05,720 Speaker 1: Here's the thing I have been struggling with this as 169 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:07,720 Speaker 1: I've been dipping my toe back into dating because I'm 170 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:10,239 Speaker 1: so used to. Obviously, I was with my ex husband 171 00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:12,840 Speaker 1: for over fifteen years, right, that's a long time. It's 172 00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 1: a large chunk of my life. I find personally that 173 00:08:20,760 --> 00:08:25,920 Speaker 1: as women, we are raised and in our generation, it 174 00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:28,480 Speaker 1: was you find a man, you take care of a home, 175 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:33,000 Speaker 1: you birthed his babies, you're barefoot and pregnant, and you 176 00:08:33,040 --> 00:08:33,720 Speaker 1: take care of him. 177 00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:36,800 Speaker 2: That's my generation. You're saying, that's your generation. 178 00:08:37,679 --> 00:08:39,959 Speaker 1: I'm on the cusp of whether that was right or wrong. 179 00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:42,959 Speaker 1: The matter is, Kathy, I never felt that in my soul. 180 00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:46,160 Speaker 1: I always wanted more. I did not want to give 181 00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:50,079 Speaker 1: up the chance to have a career. I wanted a husband. 182 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:51,880 Speaker 1: I was on the fence for a while about kids, 183 00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:55,320 Speaker 1: but I love my children. But I never ever was 184 00:08:55,360 --> 00:09:01,000 Speaker 1: fully comfortable being him the traditional values of what people 185 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:04,120 Speaker 1: interpret the Bible to say, man is the leader of 186 00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:07,840 Speaker 1: the home, the women is subordinate, and then everything else 187 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:11,480 Speaker 1: in line. I never felt really comfortable with that. That's 188 00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:13,720 Speaker 1: just like, to my core, that's not how it is. 189 00:09:14,040 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 1: That's just not how I feel. That's not the relationship 190 00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:18,920 Speaker 1: that I want. I do, on the other hand, believe 191 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:23,320 Speaker 1: that we are built for partnership and companionship. I do 192 00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:26,720 Speaker 1: believe in monogamy. I do absolutely believe in that. I 193 00:09:26,760 --> 00:09:33,040 Speaker 1: believe that the Lord designed us to have partnership, to 194 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:39,440 Speaker 1: refine ourselves and be able to live a life with 195 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:43,600 Speaker 1: another human being. Now let me get twisted for a second. 196 00:09:43,640 --> 00:09:45,439 Speaker 1: I also believe we can have many great loves of 197 00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:48,679 Speaker 1: our life. Right. I have had that young, crazy love, right, 198 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:50,920 Speaker 1: that high school sweetheart. I've had that. I loved that 199 00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:53,960 Speaker 1: man more than like me too. It was the sick part, 200 00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:56,960 Speaker 1: the butterflies, you know what I mean, That unhealthy love 201 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:59,240 Speaker 1: where I was just like I needed him. I couldn't. 202 00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:00,880 Speaker 1: I couldn't. I had to be with him like it 203 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:02,880 Speaker 1: gave me the butterflies, that gave me, the craziness, it 204 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:05,680 Speaker 1: gave me all of those things. I've had the mid twenties. 205 00:10:05,720 --> 00:10:09,800 Speaker 1: Love where I was really unsure. I've had that when 206 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:11,800 Speaker 1: I met my ex husband, the one that I thought 207 00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:13,800 Speaker 1: was going to change my life. This one was it. 208 00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:16,800 Speaker 1: This one was the one the person that I chose 209 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:20,320 Speaker 1: to be my partner and have children with. So I 210 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:21,880 Speaker 1: am sharing that with you in a sense that like 211 00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:24,520 Speaker 1: I think this is where I'm getting confused in dating 212 00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:28,160 Speaker 1: right now, because I don't have that piece when the 213 00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:30,040 Speaker 1: few people that I have dated to where they come 214 00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:32,200 Speaker 1: in and they blow me away. But I believe that 215 00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:36,920 Speaker 1: is because I am different, I have matured. I am 216 00:10:36,960 --> 00:10:38,760 Speaker 1: in a place in my life just like you that 217 00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:41,120 Speaker 1: I don't really need a man, do you know what 218 00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:43,520 Speaker 1: I mean. I don't need the kids, I don't need 219 00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:45,560 Speaker 1: the diamonds. I can buy them on my own. It 220 00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:48,360 Speaker 1: is a desire to have someone to share my life with. 221 00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:52,280 Speaker 1: So therefore I am confusing the two because I have 222 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,160 Speaker 1: had the opportunity to date some really great guys. The 223 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:56,840 Speaker 1: guy that I saw off and on for a year 224 00:10:56,840 --> 00:10:59,400 Speaker 1: and a half, he was wonderful, and he was emotionally 225 00:10:59,480 --> 00:11:04,080 Speaker 1: safe and great in bed, all of the wonderful things. 226 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:06,679 Speaker 1: But in the long run we did not line up 227 00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:09,360 Speaker 1: for me what I felt was going to last a 228 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:10,200 Speaker 1: period of time. 229 00:11:10,880 --> 00:11:15,120 Speaker 2: This man well so and therein I think that is 230 00:11:15,679 --> 00:11:20,160 Speaker 2: maybe a difference in age or maybe again I don't know. 231 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:22,400 Speaker 1: And you have both, Bathy. Can you have someone who's 232 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:24,360 Speaker 1: really wonderful, who shows up and devis you an amazing 233 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:26,880 Speaker 1: bouquet of flowers, who takes care of you, who takes 234 00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:28,280 Speaker 1: you out to dinner, who never asked you to pay 235 00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:30,600 Speaker 1: for a dime, and is also amazing in bed? Or 236 00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:31,760 Speaker 1: do you have to choose? Do you have to pick 237 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:32,320 Speaker 1: one or the other? 238 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:38,959 Speaker 2: Who knows? But I think maybe again, our experiences to 239 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:42,320 Speaker 2: help define who we are. Our past helps define who 240 00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:45,800 Speaker 2: we are in the present and our future. So I 241 00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,960 Speaker 2: think your situation was very different than mine. I think 242 00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:53,240 Speaker 2: maybe that's why you're struggling to jump into this, because 243 00:11:53,440 --> 00:11:57,320 Speaker 2: you don't want to have what you had before, and 244 00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:59,520 Speaker 2: you see that as a negative, like it was rough, 245 00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:02,880 Speaker 2: I look at the positive. I don't know for me 246 00:12:03,120 --> 00:12:05,040 Speaker 2: not that my marriage was perfect. You show me a 247 00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:09,080 Speaker 2: perfect marriage, and I'll show you two liars. But but 248 00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:12,360 Speaker 2: I had a good marriage and a great man. Having 249 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:17,520 Speaker 2: said that, where I look as is this vessel. I'm 250 00:12:17,559 --> 00:12:21,079 Speaker 2: an open vessel now, and I'm looking for that person 251 00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:26,160 Speaker 2: who will walk with me, who will enjoy things with me, 252 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:27,840 Speaker 2: because I'm at a time in my life that I 253 00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:30,360 Speaker 2: can do that. I don't need any more diamonds. I 254 00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:33,400 Speaker 2: don't need all that. I don't need all the trappings need. 255 00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:35,800 Speaker 2: I don't need a guy who's living on Social Security 256 00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:40,080 Speaker 2: alone either. But I'm saying, but Ben asked me that. 257 00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:42,280 Speaker 2: He said, well, I said, I'm looking for the guy 258 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:44,520 Speaker 2: to spend this last great chapter with. He said, why 259 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,960 Speaker 2: does it have to be one guy? I'll tell you why, 260 00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:52,400 Speaker 2: because I believe that for me, I'm not interested in 261 00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:56,679 Speaker 2: serial dating. I'm interested in a monogamous relationship. And if 262 00:12:56,720 --> 00:12:59,400 Speaker 2: i have a monogamous relationship, I feel like I'm old 263 00:12:59,520 --> 00:13:05,280 Speaker 2: enough to know when I find the right one, I'll 264 00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:08,360 Speaker 2: know that he's right because I'm taking all those past 265 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:12,960 Speaker 2: experiences I've had into this relationship. And that's why for me, 266 00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:14,680 Speaker 2: when I go out on a date with a guy, 267 00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:18,960 Speaker 2: I can tell you very quickly whether there's And that's 268 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:21,720 Speaker 2: why this guy East Coast guy, that's why he's still 269 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:25,040 Speaker 2: in my head, because I could see a future with him. 270 00:13:25,520 --> 00:13:28,080 Speaker 2: I could see. It's just you know, timings, everything kind 271 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:28,360 Speaker 2: of thing. 272 00:13:28,559 --> 00:13:30,800 Speaker 1: Not the right time, Kathy. Maybe he will pop in 273 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:33,640 Speaker 1: and it'll feel right. Maybe now is just not the 274 00:13:33,720 --> 00:13:34,120 Speaker 1: right time. 275 00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:34,640 Speaker 2: You know what. 276 00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:38,319 Speaker 1: Here's the thing. You're a freaking catch, Kathy, and who 277 00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:40,320 Speaker 1: am I? And we're at a point in our lives 278 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:42,600 Speaker 1: that we do get to be picky, right. We're not 279 00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:45,160 Speaker 1: trying to have someone's babies, We're not trying to get 280 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:45,480 Speaker 1: me here. 281 00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:48,200 Speaker 2: But wait a minute, you're just I've got I gotta 282 00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:51,040 Speaker 2: call you on this. Danna. I calling you Danna for 283 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,160 Speaker 2: everybody out there. I call her Dianna because my sister 284 00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:56,000 Speaker 2: in the last name is Dianna, not Deanna. So now 285 00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:59,560 Speaker 2: I'm going back to d you. It seemingly have this guy. 286 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:01,560 Speaker 2: So what is in your way here? 287 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,000 Speaker 1: I'm in my own way because I think too much, 288 00:14:04,040 --> 00:14:06,720 Speaker 1: because I don't want to ruin a friendship, because I'm 289 00:14:06,760 --> 00:14:09,600 Speaker 1: scared about the age difference. I'm in my own way. 290 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:13,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, won't know unless you jump in and try. 291 00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:16,760 Speaker 1: Here's the thing, he's very patient. I haven't scared him 292 00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:19,520 Speaker 1: off yet, and I am one thousand percent. Everything that 293 00:14:19,560 --> 00:14:20,920 Speaker 1: I am telling you are things that I have said 294 00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:22,440 Speaker 1: to him. I would not be saying anything to you 295 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:24,400 Speaker 1: right now that I have not already brought to his attention. 296 00:14:24,600 --> 00:14:27,040 Speaker 2: So if he knows this about you, and he's still willing, 297 00:14:27,640 --> 00:14:31,120 Speaker 2: he's he's in, I should tell you who he's in. 298 00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 2: I know. Here's the thing. You you're clearly reticent to 299 00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:48,560 Speaker 2: jump in with this guy, and you keep saying you 300 00:14:48,640 --> 00:14:51,640 Speaker 2: don't want to lose the friendship. We started this whole 301 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:55,360 Speaker 2: podcast with you going on about all your fabulous friends 302 00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:59,000 Speaker 2: that you spent and yes, albeit girlfriends. What makes this 303 00:14:59,080 --> 00:15:01,440 Speaker 2: friendship with him? It's so special that you're afraid to 304 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:03,200 Speaker 2: quote unquote risk it. 305 00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:05,840 Speaker 1: I think because we have mutual friends, do you know 306 00:15:05,880 --> 00:15:09,160 Speaker 1: what I mean? And I am traumatized by a divorce. 307 00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:11,960 Speaker 2: Oh, so could get messy. It's not really the friendship. 308 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:13,280 Speaker 2: It could get messy. 309 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:16,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what. There's so much fallout with divorce, 310 00:15:16,760 --> 00:15:20,240 Speaker 1: like friends that chose sides, friends that I don't speak 311 00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:22,600 Speaker 1: to anymore, and those were it wasn't just the loss 312 00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:24,320 Speaker 1: of my marriage. It was the loss of family, it 313 00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:27,680 Speaker 1: was a loss of friendship. I grieved on multiple levels. 314 00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:29,840 Speaker 1: That was so very hard for me. And it's the 315 00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:34,360 Speaker 1: same thing with this. We have mutual friends, we see 316 00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,960 Speaker 1: each other pretty frequently, and a lot of our mutual 317 00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:39,360 Speaker 1: friends do not know that we have moved into more 318 00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:40,240 Speaker 1: of a dating. 319 00:15:40,280 --> 00:15:42,440 Speaker 2: So you see it sort of as a then diagram 320 00:15:42,520 --> 00:15:45,480 Speaker 2: that we're going to grow trees out of this branches 321 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:47,760 Speaker 2: and you don't want to cut off branches. 322 00:15:47,600 --> 00:15:50,040 Speaker 1: And it's all out scares me if it doesn't work out. 323 00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:51,600 Speaker 1: If I wake up tomorrow and I'm like, ah, man, 324 00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:53,640 Speaker 1: I don't know your age difference, I'm scared to see 325 00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:55,280 Speaker 1: you naked, you know what I mean? Like the age 326 00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:56,440 Speaker 1: difference really gets to me, Like. 327 00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:58,920 Speaker 2: Okay, now you're hetting close to home here. Would you 328 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:02,360 Speaker 2: talk about it? I don't know. I will say to 329 00:16:02,400 --> 00:16:06,360 Speaker 2: you that if that's how you feel, you're always it 330 00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:09,480 Speaker 2: seems like you're going to find it a reason the 331 00:16:09,520 --> 00:16:13,480 Speaker 2: next guy you know maybe doesn't know your friends and 332 00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:15,080 Speaker 2: and you know, I mean. 333 00:16:15,640 --> 00:16:17,680 Speaker 1: Right, or I get to decide that I don't want to. 334 00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:21,280 Speaker 1: So we said this before. There are lessons and everything. 335 00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:23,520 Speaker 1: This this man, for whatever reason, is meant to teach 336 00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:25,640 Speaker 1: me lessons and he has been really wonderful to me. 337 00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:28,640 Speaker 2: He does he live in the same town he does? 338 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:31,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, not far from her. 339 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:34,480 Speaker 2: Yes, seriously, I know, I know, I know. 340 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:35,360 Speaker 1: He's really great. 341 00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 2: Okay, I need you to bring him to jingle Ball 342 00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:39,720 Speaker 2: so I can have a little chat with him, because 343 00:16:39,880 --> 00:16:40,240 Speaker 2: I'm a. 344 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:45,040 Speaker 1: It terrifies me to bring him around other people. Uh, 345 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:49,040 Speaker 1: the judgment from others really terrifies me. Are they going 346 00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:50,200 Speaker 1: to think he's good enough? Are they going to think 347 00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:51,680 Speaker 1: he's good looking enough? They? Are they going to think 348 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:52,400 Speaker 1: I'm good enough for him? 349 00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:56,240 Speaker 2: Guess what? Guess what matters? Guess what matters? I'm being 350 00:16:56,240 --> 00:17:00,160 Speaker 2: your mother. What matters is do you think he's good 351 00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:03,240 Speaker 2: enough for you? And does he think you're good enough 352 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:05,399 Speaker 2: for him? It matters what you guys think of each other. 353 00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:09,160 Speaker 2: That's girl talk. That is girl chat right there, and. 354 00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:11,840 Speaker 1: The same thing to him. You also get to decide 355 00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,000 Speaker 1: this is not a one way street. 356 00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:16,600 Speaker 2: He did decide, Dary, He has decided. So you know, 357 00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:18,200 Speaker 2: now you're going to have to strap on your big 358 00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:22,119 Speaker 2: girl boots here and decide, you know, whether or not 359 00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:24,639 Speaker 2: you're willing to go down the road. But as someone 360 00:17:25,040 --> 00:17:27,680 Speaker 2: who would love the opportunity of going down the road. 361 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,920 Speaker 2: I'm saying, not thinking, what the hell is wrong with you? 362 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:31,080 Speaker 1: Not? 363 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:35,040 Speaker 2: And there's nothing wrong with you, by the way, with me, Kathy, No, 364 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:38,240 Speaker 2: can we be positive here? Can we be positive? 365 00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:40,680 Speaker 1: I say that in the best way. 366 00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:43,160 Speaker 2: Well, we all have issues. But do you have this 367 00:17:43,240 --> 00:17:47,239 Speaker 2: guy who is sending you flowers, who is calling you, 368 00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:49,800 Speaker 2: who knows what you do for a living, who is 369 00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:52,000 Speaker 2: saying I know you, I know all your foibles, I 370 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,520 Speaker 2: know your children, I know your friends, and I want 371 00:17:54,520 --> 00:17:56,200 Speaker 2: to go down this road with you. And you're sitting 372 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,840 Speaker 2: there saying, you know what are you on Aisle one? 373 00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:00,600 Speaker 2: Are you the guy? And I yeah, but maybe on 374 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:03,600 Speaker 2: Aisle six, this guy is standing at the checkout line 375 00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:06,879 Speaker 2: waiting for you. What you know? You gotta think of that. 376 00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:09,480 Speaker 1: It's me, Kathy, I am holding back. What if it's 377 00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:09,960 Speaker 1: not all there? 378 00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:10,159 Speaker 2: Right? 379 00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:12,879 Speaker 1: The friendship is really great. We have wonderful conversations. 380 00:18:12,920 --> 00:18:15,639 Speaker 2: I will like, you've already wait, you've already made it 381 00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:18,560 Speaker 2: a foregone conclusion, which I think is wrong. By the way, 382 00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:21,560 Speaker 2: that should you date him, Let's go call him Joe 383 00:18:22,119 --> 00:18:25,040 Speaker 2: Supermarket Joe. We've heard that before. Let's just say you 384 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:29,639 Speaker 2: date Joe, and then three months in, you know what, 385 00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:33,919 Speaker 2: you as an adult and a beautiful, strong woman, and 386 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:36,959 Speaker 2: Joe over there can say, you know what, we tried, 387 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:39,720 Speaker 2: but we're going to go back to being friends. That's 388 00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:42,719 Speaker 2: where our lane is, that's where we fit best. And 389 00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:44,840 Speaker 2: you know what, your other friends are going to support 390 00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:46,840 Speaker 2: that because they love you and they care about you, 391 00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:51,800 Speaker 2: so don't I would encourage you to not blame what 392 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,480 Speaker 2: if this? What if that? You never know unless you 393 00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:57,640 Speaker 2: go down the road of trying. And a year from now, 394 00:18:57,960 --> 00:19:00,919 Speaker 2: I hope we're sitting on this podcast and you're saying, 395 00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,960 Speaker 2: I can't believe it worked out. I can't believe you. 396 00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:05,840 Speaker 2: Remember a year ago, Kathy, when I was saying I 397 00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:08,960 Speaker 2: was so afraid, you know, to go down that road 398 00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:11,840 Speaker 2: with him, all of those things. It could be everything 399 00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:15,320 Speaker 2: you want, all wrapped into one little package. Great sex, 400 00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,000 Speaker 2: great romance, a guy who cares about you, will treat 401 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:20,560 Speaker 2: you well, who will love your children, who will do 402 00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:23,280 Speaker 2: the dishes, He'll bring you coffee in bed, whatever it 403 00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:26,560 Speaker 2: is your dreams are. He could be just standing there, 404 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,120 Speaker 2: you know, waiting for you to wake up. 405 00:19:30,119 --> 00:19:33,640 Speaker 1: I know, and it's only I am scared. I am scared. 406 00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:36,359 Speaker 1: I am one hundred percent scared. 407 00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:38,919 Speaker 2: I am Well, you're the only one that can change you, 408 00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:39,480 Speaker 2: my darling. 409 00:19:39,640 --> 00:19:41,800 Speaker 1: I know. Do you get all of it? Kathy? Do 410 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,480 Speaker 1: you get every bit? 411 00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:45,600 Speaker 2: Do you get the we never get every bit? D 412 00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:46,800 Speaker 2: nobody does? 413 00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:49,840 Speaker 1: Asking you what do I have to figure out? In 414 00:19:49,880 --> 00:19:51,760 Speaker 1: places where like that's not as important to me? 415 00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:54,360 Speaker 2: Do you get You're like, you'll know you're not even 416 00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:57,920 Speaker 2: giving him the chance to show you. For example, maybe 417 00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:01,600 Speaker 2: your thing is and I'm being funny here, but maybe 418 00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:05,080 Speaker 2: your thing is. I can't stand it when my husband 419 00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:07,800 Speaker 2: left the dishes on the sink and didn't put him 420 00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:10,600 Speaker 2: the dishwasher. And now you're with this guy. You're rolling 421 00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,960 Speaker 2: out of bed. You know, he bought you a great 422 00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:16,160 Speaker 2: Christmas present. You're you're on a week's vacation in Port 423 00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:19,200 Speaker 2: of Iarta, and you know what, You get home and 424 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,200 Speaker 2: he leaves the dishes in the sink and you'll sit 425 00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:23,000 Speaker 2: there laugh and why did ever think that was such 426 00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:25,960 Speaker 2: a big thing? Because he'll give you enough of everything 427 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,440 Speaker 2: else you want. I'm trying to get you to think 428 00:20:28,440 --> 00:20:32,119 Speaker 2: on the positive side here. Stop looking for pitfall, Stop 429 00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:35,639 Speaker 2: looking for the train wreck that isn't there. Let me 430 00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:36,920 Speaker 2: ask you have you kissed him yet? 431 00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:38,439 Speaker 1: I have it? 432 00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:41,480 Speaker 2: Can he kiss Yeah? It's good? 433 00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:43,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah it was good. 434 00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:46,840 Speaker 2: Well, you know what if his kissing's good, as you 435 00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:49,840 Speaker 2: move down, he's probably just fine. I mean, give it 436 00:20:49,880 --> 00:20:52,280 Speaker 2: a chance. I want you to give it a chance. 437 00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,399 Speaker 2: You know, there's a lot of fish in the CD, 438 00:20:56,040 --> 00:20:58,719 Speaker 2: but a lot of them are carp and you know 439 00:20:58,760 --> 00:21:02,000 Speaker 2: you found this beautiful eel stare. I mean, I'm trying 440 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:06,680 Speaker 2: to think of a pretty fish. You know. He's standing 441 00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:09,320 Speaker 2: there saying come on, come on, and you're sitting here 442 00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:13,600 Speaker 2: giving me a thousand reasons why you shouldn't try. I'm saying, 443 00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:15,120 Speaker 2: you only have one reason to try. 444 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:17,879 Speaker 1: I do many things. Well. I can do this and 445 00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:20,000 Speaker 1: put my life out there and be really vulnerable, really 446 00:21:20,040 --> 00:21:21,560 Speaker 1: well to a bunch of people who I don't know 447 00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:23,280 Speaker 1: who are listening to our podcast. I can do it 448 00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:26,679 Speaker 1: with you in the most intimate places in my life. 449 00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:29,160 Speaker 1: The walls are really thick. Those are the hardest ones 450 00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:31,520 Speaker 1: to come down. I can be open and honest with 451 00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:34,119 Speaker 1: you and go on a television show and do a 452 00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:35,879 Speaker 1: podcast and do all of that and be true to 453 00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:37,760 Speaker 1: myself and all of those aspects. But then you put 454 00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:41,000 Speaker 1: me in a situation where exactly what I am hoping 455 00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:43,359 Speaker 1: for shows up and the walls are so thick because 456 00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:45,439 Speaker 1: I'm really scared. I'm really really scared. 457 00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:58,600 Speaker 2: Let's reverse the tables here for a second. What I 458 00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:01,080 Speaker 2: this for me? What if the tables returned and I 459 00:22:01,160 --> 00:22:03,280 Speaker 2: was saying, de I met this guy, he said in 460 00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:05,480 Speaker 2: the most gorgeou boy I'm gonna put out. I'm putting 461 00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:07,720 Speaker 2: this out at the university of it happens. I met 462 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:10,800 Speaker 2: this great guy. He's a great kisser. He's a little bit. 463 00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:16,639 Speaker 2: He's twelve years younger than I am. Let's just yeah, 464 00:22:16,680 --> 00:22:19,199 Speaker 2: he's twelve years younger. But he sent me flowers. He 465 00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:21,840 Speaker 2: loves me. We have mutual friends. But I'm so afraid. 466 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:22,840 Speaker 2: What would you tell me to do? 467 00:22:23,160 --> 00:22:24,440 Speaker 1: I would tell you to go for it. 468 00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:28,960 Speaker 2: Hello, I know, get that beautiful mirror, mirror on the wall, 469 00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:32,359 Speaker 2: look at it and say I can do this because 470 00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:36,639 Speaker 2: the upside potential D is amazing. Like this is what 471 00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,840 Speaker 2: By the way, this is what women do. I think, 472 00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:45,000 Speaker 2: which makes women's friendships different from men's. I think I 473 00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:47,480 Speaker 2: am supporting you because I think you are a lovely 474 00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:52,360 Speaker 2: kind you have so much to offer, and I'm encouraging 475 00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:55,360 Speaker 2: you to go down this road and be vulnerable because 476 00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:58,560 Speaker 2: this may be the guy at the checkout stand. You 477 00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:02,359 Speaker 2: know he may be, and if you don't take the risk, 478 00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:06,639 Speaker 2: you're never going to know. And so thank you, Kathy. 479 00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:09,800 Speaker 1: It is easy for me, as my friend to take 480 00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:12,720 Speaker 1: those compliments. It is easy for me. It is easy 481 00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:15,000 Speaker 1: for me to project that and say I know that 482 00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:17,439 Speaker 1: I'm a real catch. It is not easy for me 483 00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:20,919 Speaker 1: in an intimate relationship like that, to accept that, to 484 00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:22,159 Speaker 1: allow someone to treat me. 485 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:25,280 Speaker 2: We are going to continue working on that, because you 486 00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:26,879 Speaker 2: know what it's getting to be. The end of the 487 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:31,000 Speaker 2: year twenty twenty six is around the corner. Do you 488 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:32,440 Speaker 2: have any New Year's resolutions? 489 00:23:32,600 --> 00:23:35,280 Speaker 1: No, I don't do resolutions, and I have welcomed a 490 00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:37,440 Speaker 1: new year. I have been ready to wash the last 491 00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:39,520 Speaker 1: year off of me, let it be gone. I am 492 00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:42,840 Speaker 1: welcoming a new year. I believe that I am as 493 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:45,440 Speaker 1: close to my path as my soul's purpose is supposed 494 00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:45,639 Speaker 1: to be. 495 00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:48,200 Speaker 2: Well, you're going to get closer if that guy comes 496 00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:49,840 Speaker 2: to the jingle ball. I'm going to make sure of it. 497 00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:54,080 Speaker 2: But it's funny you say that I don't have any resolutions. 498 00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:58,120 Speaker 2: I just hope that this has been a great year 499 00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:01,040 Speaker 2: for me, even though I haven't, you know, found the 500 00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:04,600 Speaker 2: person that's going to walk with me down that Sunnybrook road. 501 00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:07,679 Speaker 2: But I've had lots of great experiences, and that's what 502 00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:10,800 Speaker 2: I want in twenty twenty six. And I think what 503 00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:14,679 Speaker 2: I realized with each passing year. It's on me to 504 00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:19,160 Speaker 2: make every year great, every day great. I can't rely 505 00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:21,520 Speaker 2: on somebody else. I don't rely on my kids or 506 00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:26,240 Speaker 2: my friends. I look to myself to make my days 507 00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:27,600 Speaker 2: and my year's the best they can be. 508 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:31,439 Speaker 1: You're freaking catch, Kathy, Well, so are you. It's in 509 00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:33,879 Speaker 1: the cards for both of us. You are a freaking catch. 510 00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:35,440 Speaker 1: We are a freaking catch. 511 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:38,560 Speaker 2: Well, I think the king in the deck has found you. 512 00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:41,400 Speaker 1: So well, let's not put the car before the horse. Okay, 513 00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:43,879 Speaker 1: everybody slow down. We'll see if I bring him to 514 00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:44,520 Speaker 1: Jingo bol. 515 00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:48,600 Speaker 2: Or not keed. All right, So, so tell me what 516 00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:50,080 Speaker 2: you want in the new year. I know you don't 517 00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:53,560 Speaker 2: make resolutions, but tell me tell me. What I would 518 00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:55,200 Speaker 2: like to see happen to be in the new year 519 00:24:55,440 --> 00:24:57,520 Speaker 2: is finish that sentence. 520 00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:00,760 Speaker 1: What I would like to see to me in the 521 00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:03,480 Speaker 1: new year is peace. I would like peace in my life. 522 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:06,080 Speaker 1: I am tired of the highs and I am tired 523 00:25:06,119 --> 00:25:08,720 Speaker 1: of lows. I want to finally, for the first time 524 00:25:08,760 --> 00:25:11,480 Speaker 1: in my life, be riding at a level pace that's 525 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:12,960 Speaker 1: never happened for me ever. 526 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:19,440 Speaker 2: Wow, No, yeah, I think for me what I want 527 00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:25,200 Speaker 2: in the new year is continued good health and opportunities 528 00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:29,879 Speaker 2: to just keep enjoying life and obviously you know, finding 529 00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:34,040 Speaker 2: that person, but just keep having experiences that where I can, 530 00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:38,280 Speaker 2: I can want be a One of the things that 531 00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:41,720 Speaker 2: I've liked in last year is people coming up to 532 00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:44,760 Speaker 2: me and saying I've given them hope. I like being 533 00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:47,800 Speaker 2: that beacon of light that shows people who are golden 534 00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:51,199 Speaker 2: that there is life after sixty, there is life after seventy. 535 00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:53,359 Speaker 2: So I want to keep doing that. My wish is 536 00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:55,080 Speaker 2: for you. I'm going to tell you what my wish 537 00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:59,040 Speaker 2: for you is that you will find a way to 538 00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:03,320 Speaker 2: calm the fear in your brain and take some good 539 00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:04,360 Speaker 2: risks for yourself. 540 00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:07,320 Speaker 1: Thanks, Kathy, I love you. 541 00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:08,440 Speaker 2: I love you too. 542 00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:10,800 Speaker 1: I'm looking forward to seeing you in a couple of 543 00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:14,800 Speaker 1: weeks when we are on a date together with someone else. 544 00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:17,480 Speaker 2: Well, you and one thing I can be sure of 545 00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:19,680 Speaker 2: you and I are not going on a date, but. 546 00:26:21,480 --> 00:26:23,960 Speaker 1: We don't have a romantic relationship, but we get to 547 00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:25,440 Speaker 1: be friends the best time ever. 548 00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:28,960 Speaker 2: You're right and I wish you a very happy Thanksgiving 549 00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:31,360 Speaker 2: you and your family, and I cannot wait to see 550 00:26:31,359 --> 00:26:32,080 Speaker 2: at jingle Ball. 551 00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:35,080 Speaker 1: Me too, Kathy. This is so wonderful to see you. 552 00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:35,960 Speaker 1: Happy Thanksgiving. 553 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:37,119 Speaker 2: Love, Thanks Weedie