WEBVTT - The Blonde Bombshell Nobody Wanted 0:00:00.640 --> 0:00:01.359 I started it. 0:00:01.800 --> 0:00:02.960 I appreciate you starting it. 0:00:02.960 --> 0:00:07.800 Man, Hello, Hello, Hello, Yeah, so uh are you able 0:00:07.840 --> 0:00:08.600 to hear me easily? 0:00:09.320 --> 0:00:11.480 You've been doing this joke for like three weeks. I 0:00:11.520 --> 0:00:13.840 don't know if it's still funny. Like, I don't know 0:00:13.880 --> 0:00:18.439 if three weeks in, if people are still laughing at 0:00:19.280 --> 0:00:23.360 I don't know if it's still funny. But all that matters. 0:00:23.360 --> 0:00:27.240 Here's the thing. It doesn't matter if people laugh. It 0:00:27.320 --> 0:00:31.600 matters if you think it's funny exactly, and you enjoy that. 0:00:32.120 --> 0:00:36.000 Yeah, because after doing stuff for you and doing stuff 0:00:36.000 --> 0:00:39.360 for Bazer, you do it. It's funny for you. Maybe 0:00:39.400 --> 0:00:42.640 Beazer doesn't think something's funny. You just do it for you. 0:00:42.680 --> 0:00:43.640 At the end of the day. 0:00:44.760 --> 0:00:46.280 Since when do you do stuff. 0:00:46.040 --> 0:00:49.800 For me on this? Oh? On the Bobby Bone Show, 0:00:50.320 --> 0:00:52.519 the Big Show? O kick your fake laugh if I'm 0:00:52.560 --> 0:00:53.120 on there. 0:00:57.600 --> 0:01:01.240 Okay, tuche, I get it. I get boy, because, like 0:01:02.000 --> 0:01:03.760 you say, with your wife, with my wife, I still 0:01:03.760 --> 0:01:08.760 make the same joke every time say Man, I'm hungry. Hi, 0:01:08.920 --> 0:01:11.000 nice to meet you. I hate it when you do that. 0:01:11.319 --> 0:01:13.640 It's such a stupid joke, but I do it anyway. 0:01:14.120 --> 0:01:16.120 I'm like you used to laugh when we first met 0:01:16.600 --> 0:01:18.319 So why would it not be funny now, she goes, 0:01:18.400 --> 0:01:20.039 because you've been doing it for years. 0:01:22.120 --> 0:01:25.400 I gotta be real. I don't get it. What Hey, 0:01:25.400 --> 0:01:28.440 I'm hungry, nice to meet you. Don't know you're always hungry? 0:01:29.440 --> 0:01:31.040 She says, I'm hungry. 0:01:33.040 --> 0:01:39.400 That's actually great, and that's I've never heard that one before. 0:01:39.480 --> 0:01:42.520 And that's when you throw hi, I'm nice to meet you. Oh. 0:01:42.600 --> 0:01:44.440 I got to do that with the nephews because that's 0:01:44.480 --> 0:01:45.480 their favorite sentence. 0:01:45.520 --> 0:01:49.280 They will say, or oh, I'm so tired. Oh nice 0:01:49.280 --> 0:01:52.440 to meet you. I'm and they're like, what, Like, well, 0:01:52.600 --> 0:01:54.920 you're introducing yourself. You're so tired, so I just want 0:01:54.960 --> 0:01:57.800 to introduce myself. But it's the stupidest joke. 0:01:58.360 --> 0:02:02.840 I've never heard it. Who did it? Keith Kid, I'm 0:02:02.920 --> 0:02:04.600 so harny? Oh nice to me? 0:02:04.920 --> 0:02:06.960 No, no, no, no, he didn't say that. 0:02:07.120 --> 0:02:07.600 He didn't. 0:02:07.840 --> 0:02:12.080 No, no, But that is what it's all about. That's 0:02:12.120 --> 0:02:14.800 the kind of jokes like you say that are just 0:02:14.880 --> 0:02:15.600 for you. 0:02:15.639 --> 0:02:18.440 See. I thought it was I'm so hungry, but you 0:02:18.480 --> 0:02:20.680 always I thought you were saying that, and it's something 0:02:20.720 --> 0:02:22.440 that you've every day in your life. You say, and 0:02:22.480 --> 0:02:24.399 she goes, oh, nice to meet you like, this isn't 0:02:24.400 --> 0:02:25.280 i've met you before? 0:02:25.760 --> 0:02:28.160 Oh no, no, no, no, this is you introducing yourself. 0:02:28.320 --> 0:02:31.880 You could also say that you could like if something, Oh, 0:02:31.919 --> 0:02:33.760 I see it all the time. I've met the I've 0:02:33.800 --> 0:02:35.359 met you before, I've lived you with your ten years. 0:02:35.360 --> 0:02:38.320 I'm aware, yes, but now that we've been married ten years, 0:02:38.360 --> 0:02:42.880 it's better when she's hungry or when the kids are hungry. Dad, 0:02:43.040 --> 0:02:46.480 I'm hungry. Oh, nice to meet you. I didn't know 0:02:46.520 --> 0:02:47.920 we had a kid name. I'm hungry. 0:02:48.880 --> 0:02:49.200 Oh. 0:02:49.240 --> 0:02:51.320 And they don't really like it. They don't think it's funny. 0:02:51.360 --> 0:02:53.359 They don't really I don't think they comprehend it, so 0:02:53.639 --> 0:02:56.639 like you didn't comprehend it. But here we are. I mean, 0:02:56.639 --> 0:03:00.079 it's for me. It's not for them. It's for me, 0:03:01.440 --> 0:03:02.320 and you would hope. 0:03:02.400 --> 0:03:04.720 I mean, I guess the comedians do they do the 0:03:04.919 --> 0:03:07.639 like THEO vond does he think he's funny. He has 0:03:07.720 --> 0:03:10.360 to write, Okay, if. 0:03:10.280 --> 0:03:13.240 You're a comedian, you have to believe you are hilarious. 0:03:13.360 --> 0:03:16.520 Okay, So then every person on planet or tells jokes 0:03:16.560 --> 0:03:17.720 for themselves. 0:03:18.400 --> 0:03:22.000 Yes, hmm, they write the joke thinking, man, I am 0:03:22.120 --> 0:03:25.760 so funny, and because I think I'm funny. Other people 0:03:25.760 --> 0:03:27.080 are going to think I'm funny. 0:03:27.480 --> 0:03:31.000 It's sort of like when Ray God complex. 0:03:31.639 --> 0:03:35.280 No, it's not that, but it's like whenever you're somewhere, 0:03:35.360 --> 0:03:37.960 like at the grocery store. Another joke that I like 0:03:38.040 --> 0:03:40.000 to do, and I do it for myself, but because 0:03:40.040 --> 0:03:43.640 it's funny is they're like, oh, how are you doing today? 0:03:43.640 --> 0:03:49.200 And I'm like, looking good. That's half the battle. I 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:51.720 do it every time. I do it at the grocery store. 0:03:51.760 --> 0:03:54.360 I do it checking in at you know, the doctor's appointment. 0:03:54.600 --> 0:03:57.000 I do it checking in at the airport, when we're 0:03:57.080 --> 0:03:58.960 checking into a hotel, wherever we are. 0:03:59.600 --> 0:04:02.600 It would work on vacation or an airport. But if 0:04:02.640 --> 0:04:07.040 somebody says that it McDonald's if I was a worker, dope, 0:04:08.320 --> 0:04:11.720 what do you mean not when you're ordering food? If 0:04:11.720 --> 0:04:14.920 it's vacation mode looking good, Yeah, you are welcome to 0:04:14.960 --> 0:04:17.159 the Bahamas, sir. Enjoy your seven day stay. 0:04:17.480 --> 0:04:20.320 No, no, it's not you don't just go looking good. 0:04:20.760 --> 0:04:23.160 They say how are you doing today? And you say 0:04:23.240 --> 0:04:25.600 looking good? That is half the battle. 0:04:26.040 --> 0:04:28.360 You're telling me when you sit down to eat at 0:04:28.400 --> 0:04:31.360 at a normal restaurant with your without the kids, because 0:04:31.400 --> 0:04:33.360 that's probably a chuck e cheese. So maybe it does 0:04:33.440 --> 0:04:36.560 work with the mouse. But if you're a bourbon and 0:04:36.680 --> 0:04:40.599 steak and whiskey or whatever it's called, how's it going tonight, sir? 0:04:41.000 --> 0:04:46.159 Looking good? That's half the battle. I would hope to 0:04:46.279 --> 0:04:48.200 god you don't do that at a nice restaurant. 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:50.920 It's usually at the hostess stand when you're checking in 0:04:51.680 --> 0:04:54.440 for a vacation. No, no, no, like when you're checking for 0:04:54.480 --> 0:04:56.640 a restaurant. You know, hello, how are you doing today? 0:04:56.680 --> 0:04:56.880 Sir? 0:04:57.160 --> 0:05:01.280 Looking good? That's half the battle. And they're like, what can 0:05:01.320 --> 0:05:02.520 I do for you? And I'm like, I'll just try 0:05:02.600 --> 0:05:03.520 to get a table for two. 0:05:04.400 --> 0:05:08.000 What if it's an eighteen year old server or a hostess. 0:05:07.560 --> 0:05:11.120 It doesn't matter. I'm looking good. I'm looking good. I'm 0:05:11.120 --> 0:05:13.480 not saying they're looking good, but I could see how 0:05:13.480 --> 0:05:16.479 they could interpret it as I'm calling you good looking. No, 0:05:16.600 --> 0:05:19.520 it's all for me. I enjoy doing that. OK. When 0:05:19.520 --> 0:05:22.160 I'm walking onto a plane and they have that flight 0:05:22.160 --> 0:05:24.640 attendant that is always standing right there when you walk 0:05:24.680 --> 0:05:25.680 into the plane. 0:05:25.360 --> 0:05:28.320 That's back to vacation modes. That strengthens my point. 0:05:28.080 --> 0:05:31.279 And they say, hello, welcome, how are you doing today? 0:05:32.040 --> 0:05:32.599 Looking good? 0:05:32.640 --> 0:05:35.720 That's half the battle. Okay. My wife just rolls her 0:05:35.760 --> 0:05:36.800 eyes because. 0:05:36.720 --> 0:05:39.919 That works vacation mode, not in a sit down restaurant. 0:05:40.600 --> 0:05:43.479 I disagree. It works anywhere, It works anywhere when no 0:05:43.520 --> 0:05:44.320 one is expected. 0:05:44.360 --> 0:05:46.600 It would work at a restaurant. You know, you're at 0:05:47.000 --> 0:05:53.640 twin peaks, you're at tilted kill somebodys looking good, that's 0:05:53.680 --> 0:05:57.040 half the battle. Hey, what do you plase want to 0:05:57.160 --> 0:05:57.679 order today? 0:05:57.760 --> 0:05:57.960 Yeah? 0:05:58.160 --> 0:06:00.839 You want something like some wings? It works with that. 0:06:01.640 --> 0:06:05.240 My wife, like I said, gets so annoyed. But every 0:06:05.240 --> 0:06:06.960 once in a while I'll catch her off guard because 0:06:06.960 --> 0:06:09.760 she'll forget about it, and I'll hit it and the 0:06:09.800 --> 0:06:11.960 person gets a good reaction, and she'll tell the people 0:06:12.560 --> 0:06:14.120 don't laugh, it's not funny. 0:06:14.240 --> 0:06:16.279 See, you've never done that one around me. If you did, 0:06:16.440 --> 0:06:19.800 my initial reaction immediate, without even thinking, I'll be like, 0:06:21.120 --> 0:06:26.440 what that's an embarrassed maybe funny, that's it? Okay. 0:06:26.600 --> 0:06:30.440 See, because my wife gets a little embarrassed, she's like, 0:06:30.520 --> 0:06:33.160 oh my gosh, she goes just ignore him, just ignore him. 0:06:33.200 --> 0:06:34.320 Does it work with a guy? 0:06:35.000 --> 0:06:35.880 Don't really know what? Guy? 0:06:36.680 --> 0:06:39.120 I told you, I knew you didn't use it. Every 0:06:39.160 --> 0:06:42.520 time there's a dude looking good that's after battle. How 0:06:42.520 --> 0:06:47.000 are you doing, Peter? It doesn't work with guys. 0:06:46.640 --> 0:06:49.080 That's I forgot the caveat. 0:06:49.120 --> 0:06:50.880 I'll call you that. 0:06:50.320 --> 0:06:52.839 That's the caveat. But there's usually not a guy. 0:06:52.680 --> 0:06:54.800 That's truck stop and fly. 0:06:55.520 --> 0:06:56.600 I don't look good. 0:06:56.680 --> 0:06:59.159 That's half the battle. What are you guys doing today? 0:07:00.279 --> 0:07:02.440 Because usually if you're at a flying j guess what 0:07:02.480 --> 0:07:05.800 they're not saying, how you doing today? You know what 0:07:05.839 --> 0:07:11.800 they're saying, is that all seven fifty six? Thank you? 0:07:12.680 --> 0:07:16.080 That's it. They're not engaging in conversation. When you're with 0:07:16.120 --> 0:07:20.560 the hostess, it's usually a female. It's usually someone that 0:07:20.640 --> 0:07:22.400 is talking to it because they are a hostess and 0:07:22.400 --> 0:07:24.880 they're supposed to welcome you to the restaurant, welcome you 0:07:24.920 --> 0:07:28.600 to the hotel, correct, welcome you to the airplane. It's 0:07:28.600 --> 0:07:29.480 not usually dudes. 0:07:29.840 --> 0:07:31.280 And you're right, they're gonna be more bubbly. 0:07:31.920 --> 0:07:34.480 Girls are more bubbly. Females are more bubbly. They want 0:07:34.480 --> 0:07:39.160 to talk. Guys are more paper or plastic. 0:07:41.520 --> 0:07:43.760 Flying Jay, I can't believe we brought that back. I 0:07:43.800 --> 0:07:45.800 was coming back from Georgia stop by one. It was 0:07:45.920 --> 0:07:48.360 NFL Sunday. They had a theater room in the back 0:07:48.920 --> 0:07:52.240 the recliner chairs. NFL ticket not saying it was the best. 0:07:52.240 --> 0:07:54.720 It was probably illegally streamed. It looked like one of 0:07:54.760 --> 0:07:57.680 those streamers from all Overseas booming it on a big 0:07:57.680 --> 0:08:01.080 screen projector recliners all at the Flying Jay. There's no 0:08:01.200 --> 0:08:03.960 dudes in there. You know why they have that to 0:08:04.040 --> 0:08:04.680 keep them there. 0:08:04.880 --> 0:08:08.080 It's a truck stop, so the truckers need something to 0:08:08.080 --> 0:08:10.280 watch they I never thought about. 0:08:10.080 --> 0:08:12.560 This, right, but if you have TV playing, no matter 0:08:12.600 --> 0:08:15.920 how poorly quality it is, they'll stay there. Eat some 0:08:16.000 --> 0:08:19.280 meals there, get some gas fuel their tires, maybe get 0:08:19.280 --> 0:08:21.760 something from the merchandise for their kids that they haven't 0:08:21.760 --> 0:08:24.200 seen in two weeks. For truckers, guys that did too 0:08:24.240 --> 0:08:25.760 many horns last time, so just won. 0:08:28.280 --> 0:08:31.600 No, that's what I mean. I never thought about how 0:08:31.600 --> 0:08:35.319 do truckers catch a part of the game. They may 0:08:35.400 --> 0:08:38.400 listen to it on their radio, but I'm saying like 0:08:38.480 --> 0:08:41.040 when they stop, because they have mandatory hours, they have 0:08:41.120 --> 0:08:44.120 to stop, so they probably time it where they can 0:08:44.200 --> 0:08:47.760 catch the Titans game at the Fly and j absolutely 0:08:48.000 --> 0:08:50.839 or they're a Packers fan, they ask them. They look 0:08:50.920 --> 0:08:53.160 up all the Flying Jas that have the Sunday NFL 0:08:53.240 --> 0:08:55.040 ticket and they call them ahead of time and say, hey, 0:08:55.360 --> 0:08:57.840 if I stop there, Bubba, you mind if we put 0:08:57.840 --> 0:09:00.880 on the Packers game. They're like, Packers suck. That's right, 0:09:00.920 --> 0:09:02.480 we won't put it on here. So then he calls 0:09:02.480 --> 0:09:04.840 the next Flying Jay and he looks for that spot. 0:09:05.800 --> 0:09:07.480 Why do you think I want to be a truck driver? 0:09:07.640 --> 0:09:09.560 Because if that is the case, where you can design 0:09:09.600 --> 0:09:11.959 your own hours, I would wake up at midnight, I 0:09:12.000 --> 0:09:14.719 would have the load hauled by noon, turn on Major 0:09:14.800 --> 0:09:17.520 League Baseball at one pm after a one hour nap. 0:09:18.360 --> 0:09:21.280 Only a one hour nap, man, that's impressive, Ray, when's 0:09:21.280 --> 0:09:25.840 a lot lizards come in? But do you take a 0:09:25.840 --> 0:09:27.880 one hour nap in the at your house or do 0:09:27.920 --> 0:09:29.880 you take it in the cab of the truck cab? 0:09:30.080 --> 0:09:32.440 That's the beauty of it. You don't leave your truck. 0:09:32.960 --> 0:09:34.440 The only time you're gonna leave it is to get 0:09:34.480 --> 0:09:34.920 a lizard. 0:09:35.720 --> 0:09:38.720 That's not See, that's the exact opposite of beauty. Like 0:09:39.080 --> 0:09:41.959 you want to go to work, sleep where you work, 0:09:42.240 --> 0:09:44.640 eat where you work. That seems miserable. 0:09:44.720 --> 0:09:47.120 Well, and actually I gotta get I'm going in character. 0:09:47.200 --> 0:09:49.120 I'm married now and I have a job, so I 0:09:49.120 --> 0:09:50.480 probably will never be a truck driver. 0:09:50.679 --> 0:09:51.559 I understand you're going. 0:09:51.520 --> 0:09:53.559 Back, But when I was single, before you were married, 0:09:53.600 --> 0:09:56.080 before I was married, that's when you're going. You're in 0:09:56.120 --> 0:09:58.120 the parking lot, you find a good one flying jay 0:09:58.120 --> 0:10:00.760 where there's gonna be some good lizards, and you're watching 0:10:00.760 --> 0:10:02.680 the game, taking a nap. You don't even have to 0:10:02.720 --> 0:10:05.200 leave the parking lot. So I see these guys around town. 0:10:05.280 --> 0:10:07.840 They got the headset still on. They're still talking on 0:10:07.880 --> 0:10:09.920 the CB, or they got music playing through their ears. 0:10:10.040 --> 0:10:13.280 They're getting some food back in the truck. It's the 0:10:13.320 --> 0:10:14.200 easiest job. 0:10:15.280 --> 0:10:17.160 See, I don't think it's the easiest job. You've got 0:10:17.559 --> 0:10:20.439 other drivers, You got all the weather conditions, you have 0:10:20.520 --> 0:10:21.680 to deal with everything. 0:10:21.440 --> 0:10:23.200 Right, But I would time. What do you think I 0:10:23.200 --> 0:10:24.920 told you the other day? Hey man, it's gonna rain 0:10:24.960 --> 0:10:26.800 around one. Are you really riding your bike? I know 0:10:26.880 --> 0:10:29.080 the weather, So I would have left the load and 0:10:29.120 --> 0:10:32.280 the rig and all that midnight. I'm delivered by noon 0:10:32.280 --> 0:10:34.880 when the storm hits, and then I'm in my cab 0:10:34.920 --> 0:10:37.439 and the storm's hitting and I'm taking a night a nap. 0:10:37.600 --> 0:10:40.040 Or you think it's that Kolbe White has the easiest 0:10:40.120 --> 0:10:40.800 job in America. 0:10:40.880 --> 0:10:42.959 Yeah, because it's mindless. You just stay in the far 0:10:43.040 --> 0:10:46.360 right lane. Who cares about because there's governors on them. 0:10:46.480 --> 0:10:49.560 They can't go ninety miles an hour. From what I 0:10:49.679 --> 0:10:52.320 was told, there's no reason to speed. So you're just 0:10:52.360 --> 0:10:55.720 hanging over there. You're seeing America for free. You got 0:10:55.800 --> 0:10:58.240 you can talk to every person you know. Imagine how 0:10:58.280 --> 0:11:00.760 many times you call your parents? Oh yeah, what is 0:11:00.800 --> 0:11:02.360 it? It's not Father's Day? What do you call me for? 0:11:02.400 --> 0:11:02.520 Hey? 0:11:02.600 --> 0:11:04.440 Dad? Just to talk? How are you doing? 0:11:04.559 --> 0:11:06.000 Ty? I mean to know, do you have the easiest 0:11:06.080 --> 0:11:07.920 job in America? I mean, do you stop at a 0:11:07.920 --> 0:11:10.360 Flying Jay and watch your packers game? I have no 0:11:10.400 --> 0:11:12.560 idea how it works. And are there Can you be 0:11:12.600 --> 0:11:14.959 a trucker only Monday through Friday and then you're off 0:11:15.000 --> 0:11:18.280 on the weekends or is it random schedule? No matter what? 0:11:18.559 --> 0:11:20.680 Yeah, I don't know that. But South Beach, he wasn't 0:11:20.679 --> 0:11:23.160 in a truck. He was in a white van. Right 0:11:23.200 --> 0:11:26.280 out of college. He would deliver stuff, not that, and 0:11:26.360 --> 0:11:28.480 it was in Austin and it was some specialized parts 0:11:28.480 --> 0:11:31.320 that they needed in South Padre Island. Don't know where 0:11:31.320 --> 0:11:33.400 he got this job from, but it was right out 0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:37.160 of college. I got Grande Communications, I got Telecommunications South 0:11:37.200 --> 0:11:39.400 Beach is delivering a part. So he would do it 0:11:39.440 --> 0:11:43.560 on a Sunday. He would leave at noon and he 0:11:43.600 --> 0:11:46.320 would listen to all the NFL games on the radio, 0:11:46.800 --> 0:11:48.640 and he said it was the best job. An he'd 0:11:48.800 --> 0:11:52.320 drive along the coast and then drive down to Padra, 0:11:52.440 --> 0:11:53.959 drive to Padre. I think he went to Padre and 0:11:54.000 --> 0:11:56.400 then came back in the same day because he would 0:11:56.480 --> 0:11:58.920 oh God, so that maybe made it bad, but he 0:11:58.920 --> 0:12:01.800 would stop buying San Marcus. He would come by and 0:12:01.800 --> 0:12:03.800 we'd have some beers and he'd stay the night and 0:12:03.880 --> 0:12:06.760 then he'd go back to Austin. Huh. But he said 0:12:06.800 --> 0:12:08.959 there's something different listening to those games on the radio 0:12:08.960 --> 0:12:10.880 when you're driving and you're getting paid to do it. 0:12:10.960 --> 0:12:13.040 I'm gonna tell you what. The best flight ever though, 0:12:13.800 --> 0:12:18.960 is Austin to brown to Harlingen, whatever it is, because 0:12:19.240 --> 0:12:21.520 it is a forty minute flight or whatever. I mean. 0:12:21.600 --> 0:12:25.160 I had, you know, Garrett's wedding down in Brownsville, and 0:12:25.200 --> 0:12:26.560 a lot of the people are like, oh dude, I'm 0:12:26.559 --> 0:12:30.719 gonna drive. It's only like a six hour drive. The 0:12:30.760 --> 0:12:35.120 flight was literally thirty six minutes and it was like 0:12:35.200 --> 0:12:39.920 eighty dollars. Dude, you want to talk about partying your 0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:45.240 balls off all weekend and then getting back having to 0:12:45.240 --> 0:12:48.000 wake up on Sunday and drive back. No, no, no, 0:12:48.480 --> 0:12:51.959 we woke up and we see everybody in the hotel lobby. 0:12:52.000 --> 0:12:54.959 Everybody's like, oh, we gotta drive back, we gotta drive back. 0:12:55.559 --> 0:12:59.760 I was at home in my bed within two and 0:12:59.760 --> 0:13:02.240 a half half hours of waking up. 0:13:04.200 --> 0:13:06.760 Why are you just telling me this freshman year of college, 0:13:06.760 --> 0:13:09.440 we went to South Padrea. We flew to Dallas and. 0:13:09.440 --> 0:13:11.160 Drove Okay, that's okay. 0:13:11.480 --> 0:13:14.200 Why did we not fly for eighty dollars? 0:13:14.360 --> 0:13:15.840 Yeah? Well, I don't know if it was that cheap 0:13:15.840 --> 0:13:16.559 from Chicago. 0:13:17.200 --> 0:13:20.120 Dude, my buddy didn't hook it up with the local information. 0:13:20.280 --> 0:13:22.160 I don't think people know you can fly down there. 0:13:23.000 --> 0:13:26.200 Maybe not, but it was amazing. It was like the 0:13:26.240 --> 0:13:28.520 one time we went to South Podish from San Antonio 0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:31.240 for college spring break and I slept on the side 0:13:31.280 --> 0:13:34.360 of the road. That drive back was the most miserable 0:13:34.480 --> 0:13:36.400 drive back ever. 0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:40.360 Imagine waking up senior year of high school in Florida 0:13:40.400 --> 0:13:42.320 and having to drive all the way home in one 0:13:42.400 --> 0:13:45.240 day in your parents' suburban and you're not allowed to 0:13:45.280 --> 0:13:49.360 let anybody else drive it hungover. Actually I didn't really 0:13:49.360 --> 0:13:51.120 get hungover in high school. I think it was fine. 0:13:51.160 --> 0:13:55.160 From where Michigan to Michigan. I had to go from Orlando. 0:13:55.280 --> 0:13:59.640 I had to go from kissing me to Michigan hungover 0:13:59.760 --> 0:14:03.480 with four dudes in the back of the car smoking pot. 0:14:03.800 --> 0:14:06.960 WHOA, don't tell your parents that. Holy crap. 0:14:07.080 --> 0:14:09.800 Can you imagine me? You know what's funny, guys leave 0:14:09.840 --> 0:14:10.800 the windows open. 0:14:11.280 --> 0:14:14.520 That's amazing that you went that far on spring break 0:14:15.080 --> 0:14:15.960 in high school. 0:14:16.360 --> 0:14:18.559 Yeah, it was. It wasn't exactly spring break. 0:14:19.080 --> 0:14:21.920 I didn't realize so many people went on spring break 0:14:21.960 --> 0:14:22.720 in high school. 0:14:22.960 --> 0:14:25.200 But it's a thing. Though. It's cooler almost to drive 0:14:25.240 --> 0:14:26.920 because everybody's going the same way. 0:14:27.000 --> 0:14:28.560 No, I get it, because then you're in the caravan, 0:14:28.640 --> 0:14:31.680 you're in the traffic, and people are, you know, tossing beers. 0:14:31.360 --> 0:14:33.640 Car to car. It's really where you're throwing the football 0:14:33.680 --> 0:14:34.240 in traffic. 0:14:34.320 --> 0:14:36.720 I've heard the stories. It's just like the movies. 0:14:37.040 --> 0:14:39.160 Ray, you want to go camping with a football? 0:14:39.560 --> 0:14:41.360 No, I don't want to go camping with the football. 0:14:41.440 --> 0:14:42.480 Should we start the show Man? 0:14:42.520 --> 0:14:46.800 Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I forgot. We were even on yeah. 0:14:46.840 --> 0:14:48.200 I thought we were just sitting in a room with 0:14:48.240 --> 0:14:50.080 Mike's in front of us, just talking for no reason. 0:14:50.120 --> 0:14:51.920 The red lights told us nothing. 0:14:52.280 --> 0:14:54.360 I gotta be more careful though, without the condom on, 0:14:54.560 --> 0:14:56.800 because I'm not able to hear the sounds. And people 0:14:56.800 --> 0:14:59.960 were saying the horn was way too loud. Actually, Bazer goes, hey, 0:15:00.200 --> 0:15:03.520 it was honestly annoying. So I go, okay, I'll tone 0:15:03.560 --> 0:15:06.320 down the horn. Got it. So I'm doing it blindly. 0:15:06.640 --> 0:15:09.400 I don't understand why two weeks later, like you still 0:15:09.480 --> 0:15:11.560 have not put the condom back on, when people were saying, 0:15:11.600 --> 0:15:14.640 put the condom on, get protection, and it's been two 0:15:14.640 --> 0:15:16.720 weeks and you still won't do it, Like, are you 0:15:16.840 --> 0:15:17.560 just stubborn? 0:15:18.160 --> 0:15:21.440 I'm not stubborn, but it flows better because we're all 0:15:21.480 --> 0:15:23.240 set up there with my headset in the other room. 0:15:23.280 --> 0:15:26.200 I can just run in there, and I think it 0:15:26.320 --> 0:15:29.200 sounds better. I don't like those headphones. 0:15:28.720 --> 0:15:30.120 So you're telling me I need to bring an extra 0:15:30.160 --> 0:15:32.440 pair of headphones for you into this studio. 0:15:32.240 --> 0:15:34.120 Now because I don't like the new ones. They have 0:15:34.160 --> 0:15:36.000 to be the old school ones from Austin days. 0:15:36.200 --> 0:15:39.440 It's like my old roommate he used to like just 0:15:39.600 --> 0:15:41.800 not use protection, and he'd just bring we'd bring home 0:15:41.840 --> 0:15:45.240 these random skanks and he would just you know, he'd 0:15:45.280 --> 0:15:47.160 be like, oh, dude, I don't need protection. I don't 0:15:47.160 --> 0:15:49.520 need protection. And I don't know how many years I 0:15:49.560 --> 0:15:52.320 had to tell them, hey, dude, you need protection, like 0:15:52.400 --> 0:15:55.240 you need to Like, dude, you're you're playing with fires. 0:15:54.880 --> 0:15:56.160 Like nah, dude, nah, dude. 0:15:56.240 --> 0:15:59.960 Nah. Well guess what, man, he brought a girl home, 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:07.200 and guess what happened. She got pregnant, still together. Yeah, 0:16:07.360 --> 0:16:10.440 they had a kid. You know how long they knew 0:16:10.440 --> 0:16:14.320 each other for she got pregnant six hours. 0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:18.440 There was his chick on vander Pump and she had 0:16:18.480 --> 0:16:20.360 said something like they were married with a kid and 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:22.120 all that. She goes, yeah, he was actually just a 0:16:22.120 --> 0:16:23.920 one night stand and then he just kind of stuck 0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:26.080 around and then they got a divorced on the show. 0:16:26.320 --> 0:16:28.120 But it was sad how she said that. She goes, 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:30.840 he was honestly on tender. It was just a one 0:16:30.920 --> 0:16:32.880 night stand and then the next day he called me 0:16:32.920 --> 0:16:34.640 in the next day and the next day I didn't 0:16:34.640 --> 0:16:36.600 expect him to stick with us, to both stick around 0:16:36.640 --> 0:16:38.680 that long. Kind of sad how she told it. 0:16:39.360 --> 0:16:41.240 That's a love story. If I've ever heard when I 0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:42.840 got a buddy that he's married to a chick. They 0:16:42.840 --> 0:16:45.920 were just kind of booty calling it. They would just 0:16:45.920 --> 0:16:49.120 call each other about midnight, one am, two am, and 0:16:49.160 --> 0:16:50.800 then next day, you know, was like, man, we should 0:16:50.800 --> 0:16:53.200 grab dinner, should grab another. 0:16:52.920 --> 0:16:55.280 Dinner instead of just a night gap every day. 0:16:55.360 --> 0:16:57.320 Yeah, and so for like, I think it was like 0:16:57.440 --> 0:17:01.560 three or four months they were just a nightcap, started dating, 0:17:01.560 --> 0:17:03.080 and then they got married and they got a kid, 0:17:03.120 --> 0:17:04.760 and they're still together and they look happy. 0:17:05.520 --> 0:17:08.159 She goes, can we ever hang out at a different 0:17:08.160 --> 0:17:10.400 time of the day, that is at two am? 0:17:10.920 --> 0:17:13.919 Yeah? Yeah, can we like hang out when the sun's up? 0:17:14.480 --> 0:17:19.640 Oh that's weird, that's a that's a weird proposition. 0:17:20.000 --> 0:17:20.560 You up? 0:17:21.200 --> 0:17:26.000 Yeah, Hey, that was a good text. That was always 0:17:26.040 --> 0:17:29.840 a good one. You awake you out, Like at one 0:17:30.560 --> 0:17:34.280 you text some random the chick you out, Yeah, you 0:17:34.320 --> 0:17:34.960 want to meet up. 0:17:35.800 --> 0:17:37.840 But mine was always with the radio show. I was 0:17:37.840 --> 0:17:40.000 getting up so early. I would make all these plans 0:17:40.040 --> 0:17:41.919 and I'd fall asleep at seven pm. I wake up 0:17:41.960 --> 0:17:44.720 to some chick twenty text messages yelling at me for 0:17:44.760 --> 0:17:46.000 not showing up to the bar. 0:17:46.400 --> 0:17:50.040 Oh that's terrible. There was this one girl. She was 0:17:50.040 --> 0:17:53.240 a Cowboys fan, had a fake rack. This is before 0:17:53.280 --> 0:17:56.760 I was married, and I texted her one night after 0:17:56.760 --> 0:17:57.600 getting back from the bar. 0:17:57.680 --> 0:18:00.280 So I was like, no, she was a Cowboys cheerly. 0:18:00.280 --> 0:18:03.399 Now just fan fan. I just remember that. I just 0:18:03.400 --> 0:18:07.040 remember that. And then she may have been a teacher. 0:18:07.760 --> 0:18:08.359 Uh. 0:18:08.600 --> 0:18:12.120 And I tested her. I was like, hey, you up. 0:18:13.240 --> 0:18:15.159 She's like, yeah, I've been watching movies all night. And 0:18:15.160 --> 0:18:18.040 I'm like, oh, come over, come over, got a good 0:18:18.119 --> 0:18:20.880