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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are

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Speaker 1: the founding hosts of Okay Storytime Podcast and we have.

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Speaker 2: Some foundational stories coming up for you.

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Speaker 1: But the thing is, this foundation needs a little support

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Speaker 1: from these sponsors. So stick around two minutes and we'll

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Speaker 1: get into the episode.

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Speaker 3: My neighbor keeps calling the cops on us for noise

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Speaker 3: complaints multiple times a day.

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Speaker 2: Maybe your neighbor is a bat and they have very

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Speaker 2: good hearing, and.

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Speaker 3: We have a drugger warning, slap my bat.

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Speaker 4: Watch out.

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Speaker 3: My parents, who are in their mid fifties and I

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Speaker 3: twenty five, have lived in this township my entire life.

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Speaker 3: Many of our neighbors know my parents well and we

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Speaker 3: have always gotten along just fine. Recently, a new neighbor

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Speaker 3: moved in next to us with her boyfriend, both in

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Speaker 3: their mid twenties, in December twenty twenty four. Since then,

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Speaker 3: she has called the police on us multiple times during

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Speaker 3: the day and has also contacted our town's health department.

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Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from Oh Well, and if

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Speaker 3: you want to submit your our own stories, go to

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Speaker 3: the Carslage Okay Storytime Stepreddit.

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Speaker 2: I'm Carly, I'm Dakota.

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Speaker 5: Oh well, I'm Keon and we're here.

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Speaker 3: To give good advice. Goofily, but we don't have all

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Speaker 3: the answers. We only know what we would do. Let's

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Speaker 3: let us know what you would do in the comments.

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Speaker 3: As Op says for context, my dad owns multiple vehicles

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Speaker 3: and motorcycles and does repairs on them, mostly on weekends

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Speaker 3: during the day when he is on vacation weeks he

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Speaker 3: may do this during the week, but still during the day.

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Speaker 3: He plays music at a low level, more like background noise,

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Speaker 3: and it cannot be heard from the street. He has

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Speaker 3: been doing this for decades without any issues from neighbors.

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Speaker 3: From what we have gathered, this neighbor works from home,

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Speaker 3: although we are not sure what she does. She has

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Speaker 3: approached my dad several times to tell him to stop

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Speaker 3: playing music and doing repairs during the day and night.

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Speaker 2: Well, when else is he supposed to do him, Linda

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Speaker 2: or whatever your name is.

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Speaker 3: She has also told him he needs to get rid

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Speaker 3: of his truck because it's too loud and rattles her windows.

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Speaker 3: It's a nineteen sixty nine Chevrolet truck and if you

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Speaker 3: know older vehicles, they tend to have deeper engine sounds.

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Speaker 3: This neighbor has put up a new flimsy fence nailed

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Speaker 3: to ours and smeared calking all over her windows. To

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Speaker 3: try to muffle the sound, she has tossed weeds and

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Speaker 3: grass onto our driveway and has started pestering other neighbors

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Speaker 3: for doing their normal everyday yard work.

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Speaker 2: Aw Man, it turns out your neighbor Jest is a

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Speaker 2: miserable person. That's all this is.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it no longer feels like this is just about noise.

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Speaker 3: I've started keeping logs of the police visits because it

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Speaker 3: has reached a ridiculous level. We have had police come

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Speaker 3: multiple times in a single day for the same issue.

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Speaker 3: Apparently the police already know who is making the calls,

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Speaker 3: but I figured it was best to keep my own

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Speaker 3: records as well. I am honestly appall. We live in

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Speaker 3: a rough little township with no ha and barely any enforcement.

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Speaker 3: Freight trains pass through just a few streets over, and

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Speaker 3: the high school hosts games that get extremely loud throughout

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Speaker 3: the year. I have no idea what this woman is

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Speaker 3: trying to achieve or if she has some specific issue

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Speaker 3: with us, possibly even related to race, uh, although that

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Speaker 3: would not make much sense since her relationship is interracial.

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Speaker 3: Two sorry, for rambling. I am just exhausted from dealing

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Speaker 3: with this woman and her constant intimidation. Edit. Clarifying some

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Speaker 3: points I've seen. My dad does not do repair or

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Speaker 3: yard work every day. Most of the time. It is

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Speaker 3: limited two weekends during his vacation weeks. He may work

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Speaker 3: more often, but certainly not every day. Other neighbors also

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Speaker 3: do repairs, yard work, and play music during the day,

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Speaker 3: but her issue seems to be with us Specifically, he

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Speaker 3: has a garage where the music stays contained. He does

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Speaker 3: not blast music from the driveway, and the garage is

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Speaker 3: a separate building at the very back of our yard.

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Speaker 3: This has been the case for the last thirty years

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Speaker 3: my parents have lived here, and she's the first neighbor

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Speaker 3: to ever complain. This neighbor sometimes calls multiple times a day.

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Speaker 3: As of right now, I'm setting up a meeting or

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Speaker 3: call with the police department to figure out next steps.

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Speaker 3: We have tried to work with her, but she's been

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Speaker 3: hostile whenever we have attempted a civil conversation. And we

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Speaker 3: have a small update yikes.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I think at this point, if the

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Speaker 2: police knows she's the one call and she's just gonna

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Speaker 2: get herself in trouble by making all of these like

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Speaker 2: necessary calls.

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Speaker 3: Like how many times are the police can be called

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Speaker 3: in the same day before they're like, hey, can you

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Speaker 3: actually like stop calling us?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 6: Don't they be like, all right, we've checked it out. Maybe,

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Speaker 6: like I think it's like two times, and then you're like,

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Speaker 6: there's no there's nothing right, stop calling, Yeah, like we

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Speaker 6: won't show up anymore.

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Speaker 5: I don't know. I don't Maybe it's like a state thing.

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Speaker 5: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Also, like noise complaints aren't even technically like illegal, it's

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Speaker 2: more just like they show up and the cops you're like.

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Speaker 5: Would you please just turn it down?

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Speaker 2: Would you please be more quiet? Like there's nothing, They

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Speaker 2: won't give you a ticket, Like, I don't think in

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Speaker 2: most I mean, I guess it depends place to place,

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Speaker 2: but for the most part, it's like a it's just

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Speaker 2: a complaint. So I don't know, I would just fully

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Speaker 2: ignore her until she just goes away. Yeah, I don't

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Speaker 2: know what else.

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Speaker 5: You could do.

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Speaker 3: Well, we got a wild update.

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Speaker 5: Oh boy, oh boy, we're.

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Speaker 3: Going down a legal route. The neighbor attacked me yesterday

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Speaker 3: when I got home from worse.

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Speaker 5: Oh.

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Speaker 2: The five thing is stay to the face. I'm calling

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Speaker 2: the police.

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Speaker 3: You're not sure what her issue is, but I hope

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Speaker 3: we can resolve this soon. I'm so tired. We have

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Speaker 3: some relevant comments. Commenter one. Keep notes every time the

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Speaker 3: police come because of a complaint, what the complaint was,

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Speaker 3: what the police said, date and time. If you ever

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Speaker 3: need to demonstrate intimidation, this will help, Opie says, I

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Speaker 3: have a journal full of these visits. Now. My dad

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Speaker 3: is having me research how to get her on intimidation,

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Speaker 3: and since it's causing a lot of stress for us

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Speaker 3: and our other neighbors, I forgot to mention I do

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Speaker 3: try to keep track of the fight she has with

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Speaker 3: her boyfriend too. She gets into screaming matches with him

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Speaker 3: a lot that everyone over around the neighborhood can hear.

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Speaker 3: Are we calling her on a noise complaint?

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Speaker 5: I was gonna say, how the turn turn tables.

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Speaker 2: It's time to call the police again.

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Speaker 3: Commenter two. I'm surprised the cops showed up since it's

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Speaker 3: during the day and most places don't have daytime noise ordinances.

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Speaker 3: Where I'm from, this would be considered a nuisance call

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Speaker 3: to the police, and they ticket the person for excessive reporting,

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Speaker 3: Ope says, I'm surprised too. We do have quite a

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Speaker 3: bit of day to day at noise between the schools

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Speaker 3: and the trains. I work at night and I can

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Speaker 3: sleep through these noises just fine, so I'm not sure

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Speaker 3: what her problem is. Communder two, it's time for you

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Speaker 3: to go to the police station and ask to speak

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Speaker 3: to the supervisor on duty. Then file a police report

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Speaker 3: with them for your neighbor pestering you. If the other

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Speaker 3: neighbors are having issues with her, they need to do

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Speaker 3: the same. Opie says, thank you. I plan to do

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Speaker 3: so in the next few days, if not today. She's

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Speaker 3: called three times today alone, uh Opie clarifying details on

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Speaker 3: the noise ordinance during the daytime that could have affected

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Speaker 3: the neighbor's working hours at home, Opie says, Yeah, we've

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Speaker 3: kept the music low or none at all, and my

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Speaker 3: dad and I usually don't idle our trucks for long,

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Speaker 3: maybe a minute or two at most. I leave at

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Speaker 3: midnight and he leaves around six am. The police have

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Speaker 3: confirmed with us that we're not violating any noise ordinance

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Speaker 3: laws and that her complaints are unfounded. Edit Toad, it's

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Speaker 3: not just the music. She calls over. It's general yard work,

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Speaker 3: repair work my dad does and the other neighbors do

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Speaker 3: during the day. She also calls multiple times per day.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes it's not every day, even on his vacation weeks.

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Speaker 3: Usually it's on the weekends if he has time. Neighbor

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Speaker 3: tends to call every time he's doing something outside in

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Speaker 3: his garage or out in the yard. We've been trying

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Speaker 3: to work with her, but she either screams at us,

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Speaker 3: ignored us. She wears big headphones outside or resorts to

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Speaker 3: calling the police. Uh.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Ours is sixty decibels during the day and noise restrictions

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Speaker 3: are eleven pm two six am. Update two one month later.

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Speaker 2: I yeah, at this point, I'd be like, is there

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Speaker 2: a way I can cut her phone line? Is there

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Speaker 2: some way I can distract her with like a shiny object? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know, maybe maybe give her a treasure map with

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Speaker 2: a big red X on it somewhere that she can

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Speaker 2: go and search for. She's just bored. Give her something

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Speaker 2: to do her task. She's so bored.

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Speaker 3: Maybe she just also really wants to do the work

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Speaker 3: on the cars. Invite her over.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's that's her big secret.

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Speaker 3: She's a big carboy. At heart.

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Speaker 7: I'm actually a Chevy truck girl.

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Speaker 3: I actually always wanted a Chevy truck from nineteen sixty nine.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I just don't know how to do it.

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Speaker 3: Uh, hello again, road it. I hope you're doing well.

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Speaker 3: Forgive me, I'm I'm not too sure how updates work

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Speaker 3: in this sub A quick deald are of my original post.

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Speaker 3: My neighbor's been calling noise complaints repeatedly since she moved

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Speaker 3: in with her boyfriend next door in late twenty twenty four.

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Speaker 3: Complaints are about my dad's music truck starting the morning

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Speaker 3: yardwork repair during the day. Let me address the commonly

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Speaker 3: asked questions that I saw. How loud is the music?

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Speaker 3: How often do these activities occur? Sixty decibels is the

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Speaker 3: limit during the day. This is about as loud as

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Speaker 3: a vacuum cleaner, according to the Health Department. When we

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Speaker 3: called them to verify, my dad and I marked the

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Speaker 3: sound setting on hystereo's volume knob, so we won't go

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Speaker 3: over that limit. Generally, the music is much lower. We

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Speaker 3: can have a normal conversation without the music drowning us out.

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Speaker 3: My guess is that it's forty decibels and below. But

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Speaker 3: I don't have a device specific for that measurement. My

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Speaker 3: dad doesn't have the music playing or is doing yard

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Speaker 3: work repair work every day. He keeps these to the

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Speaker 3: weekends unless he has a week off from work. Even

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Speaker 3: then he doesn't do it every day. Isn't a part

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Speaker 3: of the house. It's all the way in the back

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Speaker 3: of our backyard and he keeps the music contained in

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Speaker 3: there and the repairs. These activities that we do are

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Speaker 3: usually in the afternoon around one pm and later. Sometimes

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Speaker 3: we do stuff earlier, like eleven or ten am in

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Speaker 3: the summers because of the heat. Our neighbor only calls

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Speaker 3: the police during the week with many calls happening around noon,

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Speaker 3: even when we're not home. She doesn't do this during

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Speaker 3: the weekends or when I or my mom are doing

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Speaker 3: yard work in the front yard. It's only when my

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Speaker 3: dad's on vacation and he's doing some kind of yard

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Speaker 3: work or repair work with the music playing at a

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Speaker 3: low level. What have we done to reduce noise? As

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Speaker 3: I said before, we contacted the health department, I believe

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Speaker 3: that's what they're called in English, to verify noise ordinance

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Speaker 3: and anything we can do to help alleviate the problem.

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Speaker 3: We've made sure the noise is within legal limits, but

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Speaker 3: there's only so much we can do when we have

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00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,079
Speaker 3: things that we need to take care of and are

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Speaker 3: legally allowed to do on our own property. My dad

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00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:04,000
Speaker 3: keeps his repair work and music within his garage. It

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Speaker 3: was added on to the property before my parents bought

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Speaker 3: the house, so it's not directly to the side of

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Speaker 3: the neighbor's house. It's in the very back. We verified

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Speaker 3: with the detective that the level of sound coming out

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Speaker 3: of the garage is actually quite quiet, and shouldn't it

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Speaker 3: be causing that level of disturbance. The neighbor says, it does.

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Speaker 6: I feel like we're doing so much extra stuff when

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Speaker 6: we're like, we know that you're not being loud.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Can you imagine being the detective on this.

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Speaker 3: I was wondering if they just meant like some sort

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Speaker 3: of detector thing.

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Speaker 2: No, they just literally it's just a guy there being like,

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Speaker 2: oh my god, we're investigating noise. We're investigating I have

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00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:44,920
Speaker 2: to do decibel readings for this guy's stereo. See what.

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00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,280
Speaker 3: We have tried talking to the neighbor and her boyfriend

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00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:50,200
Speaker 3: to figure out a solution, but have been met with

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Speaker 3: nothing but hostility. She wants nothing to do with us.

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Speaker 3: We did allow her and her boyfriend to use our

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00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:59,080
Speaker 3: fence posts to build their own fence onto, but this

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Speaker 3: fence doesn't go the whole length of their property. It

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Speaker 3: only goes to the garage entrance, not all the way

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Speaker 3: to the back of the property. Maybe that's the reason

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Speaker 3: why she can hear the sounds. We know that she's

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Speaker 3: been adding noise proofing to her house, but outside of that,

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00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:15,040
Speaker 3: I'm not sure what else we can do. We discussed

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Speaker 3: some details with the detective, and the detective verified that

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00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:20,880
Speaker 3: we have done as much as we can within our

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Speaker 3: power to reduce the noise. Also, this neighbor has called

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Speaker 3: upwards of fifty times in the last two months alone

257
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Speaker 3: for the same issue.

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Speaker 2: How is that not her getting like right? Why isn't

259
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Speaker 2: or like whatever they.

260
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Speaker 4: Do if she needs?

261
00:12:39,120 --> 00:12:39,960
Speaker 2: It's crazy?

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Speaker 5: How did you get to fifty? I was thinking, like

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00:12:42,559 --> 00:12:46,480
Speaker 5: past ten times, you'd be like, dude, I would give

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00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:48,360
Speaker 5: her like a you know what I would do. I'd

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00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:52,160
Speaker 5: be like gift ear muffs. You're welcome, you said.

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Speaker 3: She wears noise canceling headphones outside it.

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00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,800
Speaker 2: Double she needs like the aircraft carrier?

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Speaker 5: How big are her ears. She got.

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Speaker 2: Elephant bat ears.

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Speaker 3: She's also visited the precinct enough that she's become a

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Speaker 3: nuisance to them. Please let me know if I've missed anything.

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Speaker 3: I will answer any questions I'm able to. All right,

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00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:18,440
Speaker 3: so the update. I added a small update to my

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Speaker 3: original posts on the day of But on the twenty

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Speaker 3: fourth of May, the neighbor confronted me after I'd gotten

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Speaker 3: home from work. I wasn't in the mood to really

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Speaker 3: talk to people. Night shift is brutal, much less her,

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Speaker 3: so when she started bombarding me with questions about why

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Speaker 3: I wasn't listening to her complaints, I told her I'd

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Speaker 3: just gone home and had better things to do rather

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Speaker 3: than listen to her complaints. I tried to leave the

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Speaker 3: situation after that and go into my house, but she

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00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:48,440
Speaker 3: slapped me and told me I was a disrespectful witch

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Speaker 3: and I shouldn't talk to her like that. And she's older.

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Speaker 3: I don't know her actual age, but I know she's young.

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00:13:54,440 --> 00:13:57,880
Speaker 3: I tried to disengage after that, but she refuses to stop.

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00:13:58,320 --> 00:14:01,080
Speaker 3: One of our other neighbors saw the commotion and called

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00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:04,960
Speaker 3: the police. It's been a whole thing. We're considering going

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00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,760
Speaker 3: for more than just harmful act charges. When we're able

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00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:11,360
Speaker 3: to this incident, plus my journalogs and the records the

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00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:14,720
Speaker 3: police have, we do have a case. I'm just tired

292
00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:17,920
Speaker 3: of this situation, and so are my parents. At least

293
00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:20,480
Speaker 3: my best friend and girlfriend are enjoying the drama.

294
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Speaker 7: Lool.

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00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:24,640
Speaker 3: We have some relevant comments coming to one. Was she arrested,

296
00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:28,200
Speaker 3: press charges for f's sake and get a restraining order

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00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:31,160
Speaker 3: or the equivalent where you are I hope, he says, Yeah,

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00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:33,840
Speaker 3: she was. It's a first time offense, but we've been

299
00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:36,720
Speaker 3: working with the police to figure out legal steps. I

300
00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:39,520
Speaker 3: hope we can get a restraining order after this. I'm

301
00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:43,600
Speaker 3: under two. You are into lawyer land cameras. Get cameras,

302
00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:46,160
Speaker 3: have them doing a three sixty a round that house.

303
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,920
Speaker 3: Even better if you can have the cameras record audio.

304
00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:53,000
Speaker 3: Double check your local laws. I know in Texas perfectly

305
00:14:53,120 --> 00:14:57,080
Speaker 3: legal to have outdoor cameras record audio as zero exceptions

306
00:14:57,080 --> 00:15:00,760
Speaker 3: of privacy outside including backyard. Yes, I learned it all

307
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:03,560
Speaker 3: from my own neighbor in having to do it. Get

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00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:05,800
Speaker 3: a lawyer to send a cease and assist letter to

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00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:08,680
Speaker 3: them and serve them with it, basically telling them in

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00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:12,040
Speaker 3: very legalized terms to f off and do not talk

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00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:15,480
Speaker 3: to you or interact with you. Same lawyers start the

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00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:18,920
Speaker 3: process of getting a restraining order and collecting evidence for that.

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00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:22,200
Speaker 3: Your cameras will help greatly in that department, as it

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00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:25,520
Speaker 3: will show proof, keep a log book and report any

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00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:29,280
Speaker 3: violation she does to the police. Do not interact with

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00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:33,240
Speaker 3: your neighbor at all, no speaking, no nothing. If they

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00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:35,480
Speaker 3: speak to you, all you say is you need to

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00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:39,120
Speaker 3: talk to my lawyer. There's no direct convocation. You will

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00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:43,080
Speaker 3: always go through a third party, that being the cops

320
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Speaker 3: or your lawyer. Be ready to file a lawsuit. Chances

321
00:15:46,680 --> 00:15:49,000
Speaker 3: are your lawyer will gear up for that as well.

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00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:52,280
Speaker 3: The civil lawsuit is more about making the restraining order

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00:15:52,320 --> 00:15:55,440
Speaker 3: case stronger. And is that other big scary stick that

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00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:58,440
Speaker 3: forces people in line. I am sorry you were dealing

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00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:00,720
Speaker 3: with this. That list above is what I had to

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00:16:00,720 --> 00:16:05,240
Speaker 3: do to deal with my piece of prap neighbor. Now

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00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:07,520
Speaker 3: I ended up moving over it, but had to get

328
00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:10,200
Speaker 3: all that in place to force them in line so

329
00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:12,720
Speaker 3: we could sell the place and get some peace. The

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00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:15,040
Speaker 3: restraining order to make them back off, and then the

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00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:18,000
Speaker 3: lawsuit as a big stick to keep them scared. Plus

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00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:20,320
Speaker 3: if they do anything to hurt the cell of the house.

333
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:23,720
Speaker 3: It is my big stick to go after the landlord. No,

334
00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:26,800
Speaker 3: he says, thank you. Been in the process of buying cameras.

335
00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:30,400
Speaker 3: Money's tight them. We do have some legal stuff started, lawsuit,

336
00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:35,000
Speaker 3: ro etc. Due to the Harmful Act, so that's a start.

337
00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:38,200
Speaker 3: I've been logging everything into a journal too, along with

338
00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:41,960
Speaker 3: photos of my injuries. We also stopped interacting with her

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00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:45,040
Speaker 3: altogether a few weeks before. My first post SOW no

340
00:16:45,160 --> 00:16:48,280
Speaker 3: issue there. I do hope this resolves quickly, and my

341
00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:51,360
Speaker 3: parents and I just want our piece back. We have

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00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,640
Speaker 3: another update three months later.

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Speaker 2: Put urbin jail, urbin jail.

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00:16:57,920 --> 00:17:02,560
Speaker 6: Why is she not saying any consequences, like real consequences.

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00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,760
Speaker 2: Because she's probably an old lady.

346
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:05,280
Speaker 3: No, she's submitted twenties.

347
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:09,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh no, maybe she's in a mid twenties. But

348
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:10,639
Speaker 2: she looks like an old lady.

349
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:12,119
Speaker 3: Pro Maybe that's why she's so grumpy.

350
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,679
Speaker 2: That's why she's still like an old lady. I mean

351
00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:17,360
Speaker 2: my mid twenties. I'm like, I'm eighty and I don't

352
00:17:17,359 --> 00:17:19,040
Speaker 2: even have Benjamin Button disorder.

353
00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:22,400
Speaker 3: I just look like an old lady. I do apologize

354
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:24,000
Speaker 3: for taking so long to get back to you all.

355
00:17:24,160 --> 00:17:26,280
Speaker 3: I was in a work accident in July and have

356
00:17:26,320 --> 00:17:30,400
Speaker 3: been dealing with a TBI ever since. Oh no, that's

357
00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:33,480
Speaker 3: not good. That and life has been busy for me

358
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:35,720
Speaker 3: with good things. I wish I could say I have

359
00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:39,760
Speaker 3: a good, dramatic update, but it's rather bland. Man. Nothing

360
00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:43,000
Speaker 3: huge happened. My neighbor was slapped with community service and

361
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:47,160
Speaker 3: given an order to stop wasting police resources and a fine.

362
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:51,080
Speaker 3: She lost her job, so her parents have moved into

363
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:53,120
Speaker 3: the property in a camper to help her out.

364
00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:56,320
Speaker 2: Oh that's usually when you lose your job in your

365
00:17:56,359 --> 00:17:58,440
Speaker 2: mid twenties, you move in with your parents. They don't

366
00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:03,440
Speaker 2: move into an RV in your that's crazy reverts.

367
00:18:05,119 --> 00:18:07,640
Speaker 3: We haven't had any problems since. My dad thinks they'll

368
00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:09,919
Speaker 3: move within the year or during the winter, since the

369
00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:13,479
Speaker 3: winters get super bad here. So yeah, nothing crazy, just

370
00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:16,919
Speaker 3: a woman being slapped with consequences of her actions. She

371
00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,960
Speaker 3: hasn't bothered us since, and my family couldn't be happier.

372
00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:22,920
Speaker 3: Oh and we did get a nice new security camera

373
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:26,000
Speaker 3: for our property, so some things are looking up. If

374
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:29,280
Speaker 3: anything major happens, I'll post another update, but for now

375
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:32,080
Speaker 3: I'll be back to lurking. Thanks again read it. I

376
00:18:32,119 --> 00:18:34,000
Speaker 3: hope you all have a good day wherever you're at.

377
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,480
Speaker 3: And edit to add I forgot to mention something I

378
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:39,480
Speaker 3: think you guys will enjoy. My dad is a beloved

379
00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:41,639
Speaker 3: member of our community on the street we live on,

380
00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:43,840
Speaker 3: so a lot of the older folks have taken to

381
00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:48,040
Speaker 3: causing as much noise as possible to piss off the neighbor.

382
00:18:48,359 --> 00:18:53,600
Speaker 2: Yay, it's a team effort. It takes a village. Huh.

383
00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:58,000
Speaker 3: Needless to say, I think it worked. We have another update.

384
00:18:57,800 --> 00:19:03,080
Speaker 2: Yay, jail, jail, go to jail or like just somewhere else.

385
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:06,199
Speaker 6: She probably was like since her parents like moved, then

386
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:10,280
Speaker 6: she's she's probably calling the cops to be like the

387
00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:13,040
Speaker 6: people in my yard, they're like, they're so loud.

388
00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:16,359
Speaker 2: She's calling the cops, like, my mom won't let me

389
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:18,840
Speaker 2: go out past eleven pm.

390
00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:20,879
Speaker 5: They're too dang loud, too loud.

391
00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:21,520
Speaker 3: Police.

392
00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:24,000
Speaker 2: My parents are telling me to fill out something called

393
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:29,320
Speaker 2: a jaw application, and I'm really I'm scared.

394
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:33,920
Speaker 3: This update's relatively short, but it's a very happy ending.

395
00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:37,080
Speaker 3: The neighbor and her boyfriend broke up and they have

396
00:19:37,240 --> 00:19:40,359
Speaker 3: sold the house. They've since moved out and we'll probably

397
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:43,360
Speaker 3: have new neighbors soon. My dad and his neighborhood buddies

398
00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:46,240
Speaker 3: have been celebrating about it quite a bit. Even my

399
00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:49,560
Speaker 3: wife and girlfriend have been laughing about it. We're all

400
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:53,400
Speaker 3: glad she's gone. All the legal stuff's been figured out too,

401
00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:58,040
Speaker 3: so cheers. Anyway, that's my final update for this full debacle.

402
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:01,119
Speaker 5: I'll go into it. I'm I'm going to this and

403
00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:04,240
Speaker 5: I need to see a comment or a reply. So

404
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:06,280
Speaker 5: what what that means?

405
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:10,359
Speaker 3: I'm guessing maybe no, his mom and his girlfriend, or

406
00:20:10,359 --> 00:20:10,960
Speaker 3: maybe he should.

407
00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:11,880
Speaker 7: I don't know.

408
00:20:12,359 --> 00:20:13,840
Speaker 5: I figure out what that meant.

409
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:17,840
Speaker 2: Your mom can't be your wife, not in this day.

410
00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,760
Speaker 3: I was hoping maybe, like he was saying, like, and

411
00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:21,800
Speaker 3: my dad's wife, why are they deleted?

412
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:22,680
Speaker 5: And they're deleted?

413
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:26,840
Speaker 2: That's why he got deleted because of wife and girlfriend.

414
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:30,840
Speaker 2: Just surprise Polly right at the end there anyways, open marriage.

415
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:33,840
Speaker 3: Anyway, that's my final update for this whole deboggle. Thank

416
00:20:33,880 --> 00:20:36,679
Speaker 3: you Reddit folks for sticking around for it, and if

417
00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:38,760
Speaker 3: you've kept up with my updates, I hope you all

418
00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:48,560
Speaker 3: have a wonderful holiday season. Cheers. Opie clarifies on his relationship. Ah, yeah,

419
00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:51,480
Speaker 3: I have two partners poll cul uh huh. It's a

420
00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:55,600
Speaker 3: multi generational household due to cultural, health and financial reasons.

421
00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,000
Speaker 3: I live in the US in a place with quite

422
00:20:58,119 --> 00:21:01,000
Speaker 3: high cost of living, so it makes sense to clarify.

423
00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:03,720
Speaker 3: My dad doesn't run any businesses out of his garage.

424
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:07,280
Speaker 3: He likes to tinker and fix vehicles he owns, always has.

425
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:10,159
Speaker 3: It's more a hobby than everything. Two people that live

426
00:21:10,200 --> 00:21:12,440
Speaker 3: in my house are me, my parents, and my wife.

427
00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:15,240
Speaker 3: My girlfriend has her own house. A couple of town's over.

428
00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:18,200
Speaker 2: Well, at least it's keep your girlfriend a couple. Maybe

429
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:18,640
Speaker 2: that's it.

430
00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:20,280
Speaker 3: Maybe your wife.

431
00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:22,800
Speaker 6: Your girlfriend close. You keep your girlfriend close, You keep

432
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:23,720
Speaker 6: your wife closer.

433
00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:27,199
Speaker 2: When you've got a wife polycule with a girlfriend, it

434
00:21:27,359 --> 00:21:29,639
Speaker 2: helps to make sure your girlfriend is out of town,

435
00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:30,879
Speaker 2: lives out of town.

436
00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:33,560
Speaker 3: Well, maybe the girlfriend can take the house that's opening

437
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:34,040
Speaker 3: next door.

438
00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:37,120
Speaker 2: So where are you at? Oh, I'm in girlfriend town tonight,

439
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:39,840
Speaker 2: but I'll be back in wife town in a couple couple,

440
00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:43,800
Speaker 2: wife's city, wife city, and girlfriend town. Yeah, there we go,

441
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:44,879
Speaker 2: girlfriend village.

442
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:48,879
Speaker 3: And somebody comments you mentioned she you in your last story.

443
00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:52,160
Speaker 3: Anything happened with that besays? In terms of the legal side,

444
00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:55,080
Speaker 3: she received community service and a fine. We considered a

445
00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:58,520
Speaker 3: no contact order slash restraining order, but didn't pursue it.

446
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:00,120
Speaker 3: In the end, I just see.

447
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:02,760
Speaker 6: That was just really funny that he's like my wife

448
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:07,640
Speaker 6: and my girlfriend thought it was hilarious, and you go, wait,

449
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:09,440
Speaker 6: where did that come from?

450
00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:11,200
Speaker 3: Well, because it wasn't mentioned, No, I.

451
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:13,639
Speaker 5: Was never mentioned. It was never pertinent to the story really,

452
00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:14,000
Speaker 5: but it.

453
00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:15,879
Speaker 3: Was just like I thought, anytime he was saying it,

454
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:18,760
Speaker 3: he was just switching between like saying wife and saying girlfriend,

455
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:21,480
Speaker 3: and he just like it wasn't clarifying which one it

456
00:22:21,600 --> 00:22:23,920
Speaker 3: was not a front. We've both been there the whole time.

457
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:25,879
Speaker 3: And that's the end of this story. We're going to

458
00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:26,720
Speaker 3: go to the next one.

459
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:31,200
Speaker 2: My neighbor has prohibited us from parking on the street,

460
00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:33,359
Speaker 2: but I won't back down.

461
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:37,600
Speaker 3: Do they own the street? They do not, exactly.

462
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:41,200
Speaker 2: My partner and I male thirty six and female thirty five,

463
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:44,200
Speaker 2: recently moved from the city to a small village because

464
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:46,919
Speaker 2: we wanted better schooling options for our two year old.

465
00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:49,720
Speaker 2: Like most moves, we've had a long to do list

466
00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:52,719
Speaker 2: fixing up the house and we've been steadily working through it.

467
00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:55,720
Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from user spirited Warthog twenty

468
00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:58,439
Speaker 2: six six and if you want to submit your own stories,

469
00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:01,280
Speaker 2: go to the r Slashowcase story Time subur I'm Dakota.

470
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:02,600
Speaker 5: I'm Carly, I'm Keon, and.

471
00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:05,280
Speaker 2: We're ready to give good advice goofy, but we don't

472
00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:06,679
Speaker 2: have all the answers. We only know what we would do,

473
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:09,000
Speaker 2: So let us know what you would do in the comments. Okay,

474
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 2: and Op says. One major issue has been our electric gates,

475
00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:18,320
Speaker 2: which have started failing and randomly locking shut. When that happens,

476
00:23:18,320 --> 00:23:20,679
Speaker 2: both of our cars get trapped on the driveway, and

477
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:22,960
Speaker 2: in the past we've even had to take taxis just

478
00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:25,840
Speaker 2: to get our child to nursery. We've had two different

479
00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 2: companies inspected the gates and both confirmed that not only

480
00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:31,439
Speaker 2: are the gates faulty, but the manual override is broken

481
00:23:31,480 --> 00:23:34,280
Speaker 2: as well. We were told it's an expensive job to

482
00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:38,040
Speaker 2: replace everything. The gates do work sometimes, but not reliably,

483
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,959
Speaker 2: so we decided the safest solution was to park our

484
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 2: family car on the street so we would always have

485
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:46,280
Speaker 2: access to it. About a week ago, my partner got

486
00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:49,480
Speaker 2: into the car and found a wet note on the windscreen.

487
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:54,200
Speaker 2: It had been rating heavily, so the note was completely unreadable. Curious,

488
00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:57,080
Speaker 2: I messaged the neighbors to one side of us and

489
00:23:57,200 --> 00:24:00,000
Speaker 2: across the road, since I had their numbers, I explain

490
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:01,720
Speaker 2: aim that a note had been left on the car,

491
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:03,840
Speaker 2: that it wasn't legible, and that if it was from them,

492
00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:06,479
Speaker 2: we were happy to talk. I mentioned that I assumed

493
00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:09,720
Speaker 2: it might be about parking. Everyone replied saying it wasn't

494
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:12,119
Speaker 2: them and that they had no issue at all with

495
00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 2: where we were parking. My partner later bumped into another neighbor, John,

496
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,520
Speaker 2: who also confirmed that he had no problem with the

497
00:24:18,560 --> 00:24:21,240
Speaker 2: car being parked there. A couple of days later, another

498
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:24,520
Speaker 2: note appeared on the car, saying to the owner of

499
00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:28,480
Speaker 2: this car, can you please stop parking outside our wall.

500
00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:32,160
Speaker 2: It was signed with the name of a house, John's House.

501
00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:34,720
Speaker 3: Don't dun't dun't John?

502
00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:37,000
Speaker 2: Why you lying to me? Man, I'm coming to you

503
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:38,880
Speaker 2: face to face. You've got nothing to say to.

504
00:24:38,840 --> 00:24:41,520
Speaker 3: Me, John, John's a little liar.

505
00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:46,560
Speaker 2: Come on. John, the same neighbor who had told my

506
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:48,919
Speaker 2: partner days earlier that he had no issue with it.

507
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:53,280
Speaker 2: Which is weird but okay for context. We could park

508
00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:58,480
Speaker 2: directly outside our house, but it feels dangerous. We live

509
00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:00,919
Speaker 2: on the corner of a narrow sh coming off a

510
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:04,000
Speaker 2: busy road, and if we park outside our house drivers

511
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:06,640
Speaker 2: turning in our face with a dark, barely visible car

512
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:09,399
Speaker 2: due to poor street lighting. The spot we chose was

513
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:12,280
Speaker 2: about thirty feet from our house, directly under a street lamp,

514
00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:15,520
Speaker 2: where visibility is far better. The next day we received

515
00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:18,919
Speaker 2: another note saying I have told you already to stop

516
00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:21,840
Speaker 2: parking in front of all wall. To try and stop

517
00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:24,720
Speaker 2: this from escalating, we decided to write a note back

518
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:29,080
Speaker 2: introducing ourselves, confirming the car was ours, and explaining our

519
00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:32,200
Speaker 2: reasoning for parking there. When my partner went to drop

520
00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 2: off the note, John's wife appeared at the door before

521
00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:38,560
Speaker 2: she could even knock. According to my partner, the woman

522
00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:41,960
Speaker 2: took a slightly aggressive stance and said, you will not

523
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:44,960
Speaker 2: park there again. I will not allow it. I don't

524
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:47,680
Speaker 2: want to see your car there after tonight. No real

525
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:50,520
Speaker 2: reasoning was given other than that she didn't like it

526
00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:53,160
Speaker 2: and felt it made the street look messy.

527
00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 3: Should rat her out to John, who seems like a

528
00:25:57,359 --> 00:25:58,080
Speaker 3: chill guy.

529
00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:01,560
Speaker 2: Or he was lying, I'd have been lying. He might

530
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:02,080
Speaker 2: have been lying.

531
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:04,160
Speaker 3: That'd be sad. I don't want John to be a liar.

532
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 2: When my partner tried to leave and said she wanted

533
00:26:07,280 --> 00:26:09,600
Speaker 2: to speak with me about it, the woman followed her

534
00:26:09,760 --> 00:26:12,840
Speaker 2: down the driveway, continuing to question where we intended to

535
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:16,160
Speaker 2: park the car in the future. During that conversation, when

536
00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:18,800
Speaker 2: safety came up, the woman mentioned that she knows oh

537
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:23,239
Speaker 2: about safety because she works at a local nursery. I

538
00:26:23,320 --> 00:26:24,440
Speaker 2: hope it's not your nursery.

539
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:25,120
Speaker 7: Oh my god.

540
00:26:25,800 --> 00:26:29,240
Speaker 2: My partner, caught off guard, responded by saying that our

541
00:26:29,359 --> 00:26:33,359
Speaker 2: child attends that very nursery. Now, this frustrated neighbor knows

542
00:26:33,359 --> 00:26:36,399
Speaker 2: our child could be under her supervision. She didn't know

543
00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:38,639
Speaker 2: our child's name or what they look like yet, but

544
00:26:38,720 --> 00:26:41,320
Speaker 2: she does know our address, and I'm sure our details

545
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:44,240
Speaker 2: could easily be accessed through nursery systems if someone wanted

546
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:48,960
Speaker 2: to look. The very next morning, another note appeared saying,

547
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:53,840
Speaker 2: as agreed stop parking your car in front of our wall.

548
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:56,880
Speaker 2: So to be clear, we had not agreed to anything

549
00:26:57,400 --> 00:26:59,920
Speaker 2: at this point because of the nursery connection. I wanted

550
00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:03,800
Speaker 2: to de escalate the situation. I bought chocolates and wrote

551
00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:06,680
Speaker 2: what I felt was a respectful note explaining our position.

552
00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:10,680
Speaker 2: I explained the safety concerns, acknowledged that the road is public,

553
00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:13,879
Speaker 2: stated that we intended to continue parking there, and offered

554
00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:16,439
Speaker 2: to move the car temporarily if they needed space for

555
00:27:16,520 --> 00:27:19,960
Speaker 2: gardening work. For context, there is around three feet of

556
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:23,120
Speaker 2: space between their wall and the car, but we understand

557
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 2: it could be easier for them if they are trimming hedges.

558
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 2: My partner delivered the note while I was picking up

559
00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:30,800
Speaker 2: our child. By the time I got home, the neighbor

560
00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:34,000
Speaker 2: was on our porch, raising her voice at my partner.

561
00:27:34,560 --> 00:27:37,600
Speaker 2: I approached, handed our child to their mom and took

562
00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:41,440
Speaker 2: over the conversation. At that point, she now also knew

563
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:44,680
Speaker 2: what our child looked like. She handed back the chocolates

564
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:47,840
Speaker 2: and the note, saying she would not accept them. She

565
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:51,879
Speaker 2: insisted we were disrespectful, claimed she had never had trouble

566
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:54,280
Speaker 2: with neighbors before, and said we needed to fix our

567
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:55,960
Speaker 2: gates instead of parking on the street.

568
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:58,320
Speaker 3: You want to pay for it. We'll park in our

569
00:27:58,359 --> 00:27:59,520
Speaker 3: gates if you pay for it.

570
00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 2: I asked her directly what her actual issue with the

571
00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:06,600
Speaker 2: parking was, and all she would say was I just

572
00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:09,280
Speaker 2: don't like it. There there were no access issues or

573
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:11,560
Speaker 2: safety concerns. She told me to park in front of

574
00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:13,800
Speaker 2: another neighbor's house and suggested I needed to have a

575
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:19,480
Speaker 2: word with my partner because she doesn't listen. Ooh oh my,

576
00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:22,359
Speaker 2: I would be oh my god, I would rip this

577
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:26,960
Speaker 2: person a new one, so bad, so bad. I stayed

578
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:30,080
Speaker 2: polite and listened, said I would consider her opinion, and

579
00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 2: eventually got her to leave. We have not moved the car.

580
00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:37,919
Speaker 2: Annoyed because the parking is legal, safer, and reasonable. She

581
00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:42,440
Speaker 2: continues to call us rude, disrespectful and implies we are troublemakers.

582
00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:45,080
Speaker 2: So am I the a hole for standing firm and

583
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:47,640
Speaker 2: continuing to park the car in the safest and most

584
00:28:47,640 --> 00:28:51,480
Speaker 2: convenient spot for us despite her frustration. There is an update.

585
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:55,200
Speaker 6: You're not no, keep doing it there, No, there are

586
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 6: no laws for stopping you to park there.

587
00:28:57,320 --> 00:29:02,200
Speaker 3: There are no laws. Batman, I E I what is

588
00:29:02,240 --> 00:29:04,160
Speaker 3: shit want? If there's an emergency and both of your

589
00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:07,080
Speaker 3: cars are stuck behind the gate, knock knock, knock, three am.

590
00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:09,320
Speaker 3: Hey lady, I parked my car behind the gate and

591
00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:11,600
Speaker 3: is stuck. Now you gotta get up and drive me.

592
00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:14,320
Speaker 5: Honestly, I would do that just to take them off.

593
00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:17,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'd make up places I had to go. I

594
00:29:17,560 --> 00:29:20,720
Speaker 3: parked my car back there, lady, you really want me

595
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:24,719
Speaker 3: to knock, knock, knock, Gotta drive me my car stuck.

596
00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:28,840
Speaker 2: Update. We spoke to the nursery about our child having

597
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:31,960
Speaker 2: contact with this woman and requested that there be none.

598
00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:35,040
Speaker 2: They assured us they take this seriously and will update

599
00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 2: us on Monday. As expected, there was another note on

600
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 2: the car this morning telling us to move it immediately.

601
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:44,440
Speaker 2: We've added it to the pile and are keeping all

602
00:29:44,480 --> 00:29:46,920
Speaker 2: of them in case we ever need them later. We

603
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:50,320
Speaker 2: also contacted our local non urgent police line for advice.

604
00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:53,120
Speaker 2: They checked the address and confirmed we are fully within

605
00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 2: our rights to park where we are. They explained that

606
00:29:55,840 --> 00:29:58,400
Speaker 2: notes and an aggressive tone do not meet the threshold

607
00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 2: for threats. Only direct threat of or property damage would.

608
00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:06,760
Speaker 2: If the notes become threatening, they advised us to call back.

609
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:10,320
Speaker 2: They also mentioned that repeated visits to our door could

610
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:14,200
Speaker 2: potentially become a stalking issue, so that feels extreme right now.

611
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:17,600
Speaker 2: Many people suggested disconnecting the power to the gates while

612
00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:20,880
Speaker 2: they're open, which is an option, but it may invalidate

613
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:24,200
Speaker 2: our home or car insurance. We plan to speak with

614
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:28,960
Speaker 2: our insurer first. Until this afternoon, when the intercom buzzed.

615
00:30:29,560 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 2: Oh no, oh boy.

616
00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:35,520
Speaker 3: Oh I think I'd fix my gate and continue to

617
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:36,240
Speaker 3: park up the street.

618
00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:41,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I would. I would. I would buy a clunked

619
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:45,920
Speaker 2: out old car that barely runs, and I would park

620
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:49,720
Speaker 2: it there and I would let it collect dust. That's

621
00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:51,840
Speaker 2: what I would do. Yeah, I'd buy two.

622
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:54,360
Speaker 3: I'd fill the whole street with cars. Yep.

623
00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:57,160
Speaker 2: And I'd say and I'd put I'd put a little

624
00:30:57,200 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 2: camera in them, and I'd say, oh, I can't wait.

625
00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:04,160
Speaker 2: Who she vandalizes my property so I can get hoo.

626
00:31:04,440 --> 00:31:06,840
Speaker 3: Yeah? Why would thallis and percent make sure I had

627
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:08,880
Speaker 3: a camera in that car though, because I do feel

628
00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:10,280
Speaker 3: like she's going to do something to it.

629
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:15,280
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, get a get a clunker, Get the ugliest

630
00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:18,760
Speaker 2: clunker car you could ever possibly find, and park it

631
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:22,200
Speaker 2: in that spot. Go ahead, do it. And there's a

632
00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:27,400
Speaker 2: little bit more story. It was her again, saying your

633
00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:29,400
Speaker 2: car is still there. You have to move it now.

634
00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:32,200
Speaker 2: I said I was busy, but she insisted i'd come

635
00:31:32,240 --> 00:31:34,840
Speaker 2: out to talk. It was pouring rain, but I went

636
00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 2: out anyway. Why why would you? I'd be like, you

637
00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:39,200
Speaker 2: need to leave, and if you don't, I'll be calling

638
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:39,680
Speaker 2: the police.

639
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:43,120
Speaker 3: Hey, you're on my property. You're trustpassing. Actually, yeah, I

640
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:44,840
Speaker 3: can't have to leave.

641
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:48,320
Speaker 2: I've made it clear. She repeated the same arguments, and

642
00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:51,320
Speaker 2: I explained all the advice we had received. She said

643
00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:53,960
Speaker 2: she knows the police say it's fine, but it's not

644
00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:58,080
Speaker 2: fine with her. Oh guess who doesn't care about that.

645
00:31:58,080 --> 00:32:02,080
Speaker 2: That's a metric that holds no wait for anyone. If

646
00:32:02,080 --> 00:32:06,000
Speaker 2: you're a nasty, mean person who no one likes. If

647
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:08,720
Speaker 2: I liked you and it bothered you, maybe i'd be

648
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:11,000
Speaker 2: more inclined to help you. But you've been nothing but

649
00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 2: obtuse and rude to me. Funny how that works. I

650
00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:19,200
Speaker 2: was almost ready to back down, just to stop the situation,

651
00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:21,720
Speaker 2: until she said that if I didn't move the car immediately,

652
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 2: she would move her own cars out of her garage

653
00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:27,840
Speaker 2: and block hours in one in front and one behind.

654
00:32:28,400 --> 00:32:32,240
Speaker 2: I honestly struggled not to laugh. It felt petty and

655
00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:35,640
Speaker 2: would only make things worse. I told her, okay, said

656
00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:38,200
Speaker 2: I had to go inside and shut the door. Dash

657
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:41,360
Speaker 2: cams arrived today and I'll be fitting them tomorrow. I

658
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 2: fully expect another note on the car or a blockade

659
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:46,000
Speaker 2: waiting for us.

660
00:32:46,320 --> 00:32:49,880
Speaker 3: Just go park your other car in front of your

661
00:32:49,960 --> 00:32:51,640
Speaker 3: car on the street, so that if she wants to

662
00:32:51,640 --> 00:32:54,000
Speaker 3: block you in, she can only do from behind. And

663
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:55,719
Speaker 3: then you also have two in front of her house. Oh.

664
00:32:55,720 --> 00:32:57,239
Speaker 2: I thought she was saying, oh, you were gonna put

665
00:32:57,360 --> 00:33:00,000
Speaker 2: block she was gonna block your gates like block your rdin.

666
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:02,040
Speaker 3: No, I think she's gonna park her cars on either

667
00:33:02,080 --> 00:33:03,160
Speaker 3: side of the car on the street.

668
00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:06,480
Speaker 2: No, that is that's funny. And that's the end of

669
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:08,880
Speaker 2: this story. We're gonna go on to the next one.

670
00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,120
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam. We'll get back to the stories. But

671
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:12,960
Speaker 1: here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

672
00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:17,480
Speaker 3: My boyfriend stormed out on my birthday just because I

673
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:18,480
Speaker 3: asked for coffee.

674
00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 2: M babe, I'm exclusively hojicha.

675
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 3: Okay, we have a trigger warning for emotional. My boyfriend

676
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:30,000
Speaker 3: thirty six mail and I have been dating a little

677
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:32,240
Speaker 3: over a year, and I honestly don't know what to

678
00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 3: think anymore. For some context, last year, on this exact day,

679
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:39,920
Speaker 3: twenty ninth birthday, I was blindsided with news that I

680
00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:44,400
Speaker 3: unfairly and unexpectedly failed a clinical rotation in my doctorate

681
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:49,080
Speaker 3: program Pediatric Acute Care Nurse Practitioner program. They failed me

682
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:53,840
Speaker 3: eight months before graduation and the program is four years total.

683
00:33:54,600 --> 00:33:57,720
Speaker 3: I would have graduated in May. I spent the last

684
00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:01,960
Speaker 3: year grieving that severe depression, and just last month I

685
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:05,480
Speaker 3: finally got to re enter the class. By the way,

686
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:07,720
Speaker 3: this comes from deleted and if you want to submit

687
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:10,600
Speaker 3: your own stories, go to the arslash Okay storytime subreddit.

688
00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:14,640
Speaker 3: I'm Carly, I'm Dakota, I'm Keon, and we're here to

689
00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:17,360
Speaker 3: give good advice goofully, but we don't have all the answers.

690
00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:18,880
Speaker 3: We only know what we would do, So let us

691
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:21,320
Speaker 3: know what you would do in the comments, and Opie says,

692
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:24,640
Speaker 3: I am now working with a lawyer and spending thousands

693
00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:27,600
Speaker 3: of dollars because the same mentor and professor tried to

694
00:34:27,680 --> 00:34:31,800
Speaker 3: dismiss me unfairly again during the first week of classes

695
00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:35,120
Speaker 3: after a year of waiting to retake this class as

696
00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:39,880
Speaker 3: it is only offered once a year in June. Just yesterday,

697
00:34:39,920 --> 00:34:42,960
Speaker 3: the lawyer asked me for a time sensitive document and

698
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:46,719
Speaker 3: also has asked for one today on my birthday. He

699
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:49,759
Speaker 3: came over unexpectedly last night, even though I told him

700
00:34:49,760 --> 00:34:52,400
Speaker 3: I had a lot to do and I barely slept

701
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:57,080
Speaker 3: this morning. I was tired, low energy, and emotionally drained,

702
00:34:57,360 --> 00:34:59,879
Speaker 3: not mean or trying to pick a fight. I asked

703
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:02,359
Speaker 3: what we should do today. Our only plan was an

704
00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:05,120
Speaker 3: eight pm dinner with my family. He just said, well,

705
00:35:05,239 --> 00:35:08,080
Speaker 3: what do you want to do. I got frustrated. I've

706
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:10,920
Speaker 3: been carrying so much lately. I was hoping he'd just

707
00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:13,760
Speaker 3: set up, make a plan, or even grab a coffee

708
00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:16,520
Speaker 3: or breakfast to start the day. I took a shower,

709
00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:20,680
Speaker 3: got ready, et cetera, about an hour's worth of time,

710
00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:23,840
Speaker 3: and I thought when I went downstairs around ten thirty am,

711
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:26,000
Speaker 3: he would have a coffee waiting for me, since I

712
00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:29,359
Speaker 3: expressed I wanted one. Well, I went downstairs and he

713
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:31,120
Speaker 3: was sitting on the couch with a grim look on

714
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:33,680
Speaker 3: his face. I said, you didn't get coffee or anything.

715
00:35:34,320 --> 00:35:37,719
Speaker 3: He got defensive and said I was being ungrateful. He

716
00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:40,959
Speaker 3: ended up storming out, telling me I ruined my own

717
00:35:41,040 --> 00:35:44,480
Speaker 3: birthday and that I should sit with the consequences of

718
00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:48,200
Speaker 3: how I acted. He left around eleven thirty am and

719
00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:51,719
Speaker 3: hasn't contacted me once. We have a dinner reservation tomorrow

720
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:54,160
Speaker 3: with some of our friends, but he already told me

721
00:35:54,200 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 3: we'd go for the sake of guests, not to celebrate me.

722
00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:00,960
Speaker 3: Now it's six pm, I still haven't heard from him.

723
00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:04,000
Speaker 3: I need to write another legal document for my lawyer

724
00:36:04,120 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 3: since today is the last day of the semester and

725
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:10,640
Speaker 3: I'm under intense pressure to get it written asap. My

726
00:36:10,719 --> 00:36:14,839
Speaker 3: boyfriend knows all of this. I'm so depressed and overwhelmed

727
00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:17,080
Speaker 3: that I can't move. I don't even want to go

728
00:36:17,120 --> 00:36:19,640
Speaker 3: to dinner with my family anymore. He says I never

729
00:36:19,680 --> 00:36:23,239
Speaker 3: take accountability. He says, I make everything about me. But

730
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:26,600
Speaker 3: I didn't scream at him, I didn't insult him. I

731
00:36:26,719 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 3: just expressed disappointment and hoped to feel special after the

732
00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:32,799
Speaker 3: last year. On my birthday. I also want to mention

733
00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:35,319
Speaker 3: once he started yelling at me and insisting that I

734
00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:37,560
Speaker 3: said he does nothing for me, which I know I

735
00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:40,279
Speaker 3: did not, and telling me I owe him an apology

736
00:36:40,360 --> 00:36:43,400
Speaker 3: and I need to take accountability. I lost it. He

737
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:46,279
Speaker 3: knows I am not okay and all the pressure I'm under,

738
00:36:46,320 --> 00:36:49,640
Speaker 3: and is acting this way on my birthday. I started

739
00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:52,719
Speaker 3: yelling back and crying and slammed my bedroom door. That's

740
00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:54,080
Speaker 3: when he left and said, f you.

741
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:57,719
Speaker 2: Honestly, this is so cartoonish. It almost sounds like this

742
00:36:57,800 --> 00:37:01,400
Speaker 2: guy just doesn't know how to break up with somebody,

743
00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:04,319
Speaker 2: and he's instead just being as bad as possible to

744
00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 2: make you.

745
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:05,200
Speaker 7: Do it for him.

746
00:37:05,480 --> 00:37:08,520
Speaker 3: Yeah. I said, you're really doing this on my birthday.

747
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:11,279
Speaker 3: You know I was failed unexpected last year on my

748
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,799
Speaker 3: exact birthday and wanted to reclaim that. He said he

749
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:17,200
Speaker 3: didn't care and I should think about my behavior and

750
00:37:17,239 --> 00:37:20,920
Speaker 3: that they have consequences. One more edit, his dad and

751
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:24,320
Speaker 3: I share the same birthday. He's very ameshed with his family,

752
00:37:24,480 --> 00:37:26,760
Speaker 3: which I usually don't mind since we live an hour

753
00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:29,760
Speaker 3: apart and don't get to see each other daily. Before

754
00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:32,640
Speaker 3: my birthday, he brought up using a hotel suite we

755
00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:36,120
Speaker 3: had won during Halloween contest to celebrate with his dad

756
00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:40,080
Speaker 3: on Friday, my actual birthday. The hotel is meaningful to

757
00:37:40,120 --> 00:37:42,640
Speaker 3: his parents because they spent part of their honeymoon there.

758
00:37:43,239 --> 00:37:46,959
Speaker 3: He said, we could celebrate my birthday the next day instead, Dude,

759
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:55,120
Speaker 3: that's what people like, celebrating their birthdays on their birthdays usually. Also,

760
00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:57,960
Speaker 3: his parents don't like me because they think I'm unreliable

761
00:37:57,960 --> 00:38:02,640
Speaker 3: and unseerious my unexpected failure, and my parents don't like

762
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:05,160
Speaker 3: him as they are around a lot when he acts

763
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:07,960
Speaker 3: like this and see me crying on the phone and anxious,

764
00:38:07,960 --> 00:38:11,480
Speaker 3: et cetera, when I should be focused on school, so

765
00:38:11,760 --> 00:38:15,040
Speaker 3: me celebrating with his family on Friday was not an option.

766
00:38:15,680 --> 00:38:18,480
Speaker 3: I was a little disappointed. It was my thirtieth and

767
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,799
Speaker 3: I'd hope he'd want to spend the actual day with me,

768
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:21,719
Speaker 3: or at least.

769
00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:22,000
Speaker 7: Part of it.

770
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:25,279
Speaker 3: But when I said that, he flipped out and called

771
00:38:25,320 --> 00:38:27,680
Speaker 3: me selfish and yelled at me. I was already so

772
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:31,080
Speaker 3: emotionally drained from everything going on with school and the

773
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:33,720
Speaker 3: lawyer that I just told him that it was fine.

774
00:38:34,120 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 3: I even sent him screenshots of my mom telling me

775
00:38:36,719 --> 00:38:39,120
Speaker 3: it wasn't a big deal and to let him celebrate

776
00:38:39,160 --> 00:38:42,240
Speaker 3: with his family, just so he'd calm down and stop

777
00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:45,440
Speaker 3: attacking me. Later, I found out his sister and her

778
00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:49,080
Speaker 3: boyfriend were in Greece, so his family wasn't even celebrating

779
00:38:49,120 --> 00:38:51,960
Speaker 3: that day and expected me to just assume he can

780
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:54,799
Speaker 3: come to dinner with my family and I. This left

781
00:38:54,840 --> 00:38:57,280
Speaker 3: a bad taste in my mouth and ruined the excitement

782
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:00,759
Speaker 3: around my birthday. Is this on me? Or is emotionally

783
00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:04,680
Speaker 3: harmful and unsafe? We have an update from the same day. Still,

784
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:06,320
Speaker 3: I don't like your boyfriend.

785
00:39:06,960 --> 00:39:10,279
Speaker 2: I don't like your boyfriend, you should break up with him.

786
00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:13,040
Speaker 2: No one should be yelling at you on your birthdays.

787
00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 2: Yelling at you on your birthday a breakup.

788
00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:17,400
Speaker 5: Oh you're yelling happy birthday.

789
00:39:19,360 --> 00:39:21,640
Speaker 3: Update at eight pm and he knows I had a

790
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:24,200
Speaker 3: reservation at this time for my birthday dinner, but he

791
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:27,920
Speaker 3: had my location and sees I'm home. After ignoring me

792
00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:30,239
Speaker 3: all day, he said, I hope your call with the

793
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:32,640
Speaker 3: lawyer was productive and you have a nice birthday dinner

794
00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:35,719
Speaker 3: with your family. He also FaceTime me multiple times. But

795
00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:37,480
Speaker 3: I will not be responding.

796
00:39:37,680 --> 00:39:39,840
Speaker 2: Just the absolute gall of that guy to think he

797
00:39:39,880 --> 00:39:42,000
Speaker 2: can just call you and be like, it's fine, have

798
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:44,600
Speaker 2: a good birthday, have a whatever, it's fine.

799
00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:48,840
Speaker 3: Insane. Update two went to dinner and trying to finish

800
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:50,920
Speaker 3: note on my phone as my parents were having a

801
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:53,960
Speaker 3: meltdown about me missing my birthday dinner two years in

802
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:57,120
Speaker 3: a row now. And also, no, my boyfriend does this

803
00:39:57,239 --> 00:40:00,680
Speaker 3: during holidays and big events and refuse allow him to

804
00:40:00,719 --> 00:40:02,799
Speaker 3: ruin my birthday after this past year.

805
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:06,040
Speaker 2: Wait, so he always has done this. It's always anytime

806
00:40:06,040 --> 00:40:08,280
Speaker 2: it's a big event. He's always going crazy.

807
00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:10,400
Speaker 3: He didn't ruin the birthday last year, but he's ruined

808
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:13,160
Speaker 3: other holidays and stuff. And they've only been dating for

809
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:16,439
Speaker 3: like a year, Right, what a door? Wasn't it only

810
00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:16,960
Speaker 3: like a year?

811
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:20,480
Speaker 2: Not long enough to not break up with him immediately? Yeah,

812
00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:22,360
Speaker 2: he had to break up with this guy the first

813
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:26,479
Speaker 2: time he ruined something, Yeah, or the second first time?

814
00:40:26,520 --> 00:40:29,880
Speaker 2: You maybe write it off. Okay, somebody, somebody woke up

815
00:40:29,960 --> 00:40:34,920
Speaker 2: on the wrong side of the bed today. However, multiple times,

816
00:40:35,040 --> 00:40:37,439
Speaker 2: over and over and over again. Why what are we doing.

817
00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:40,000
Speaker 2: You're not going to fix him. You're not supposed to

818
00:40:40,040 --> 00:40:40,840
Speaker 2: fix him.

819
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:45,200
Speaker 3: Update three, He found the Reddit post and of course

820
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:48,560
Speaker 3: is saying my recall of events are inaccurate and that

821
00:40:48,760 --> 00:40:51,080
Speaker 3: I was, in fact the one who ruined my birthday

822
00:40:51,120 --> 00:40:53,840
Speaker 3: and he has no part in ruining my birthday.

823
00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:56,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course not, of course he doesn't.

824
00:40:57,360 --> 00:41:00,319
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm in one this where it's like a twenty

825
00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:02,640
Speaker 3: year old wrote it, not a thirty year old. I

826
00:41:02,680 --> 00:41:05,440
Speaker 3: think you have too much crap on your plate for distractions,

827
00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:08,759
Speaker 3: and clearly your boyfriend is a distraction because here you

828
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,920
Speaker 3: are on Reddit thinking about your relationship instead of getting

829
00:41:11,920 --> 00:41:15,040
Speaker 3: crap done that you need to do. If a relationship

830
00:41:15,120 --> 00:41:17,600
Speaker 3: is draining your energy, then it's time to cut ties,

831
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:21,320
Speaker 3: stay in relationships that boost your energy, fuel your goals,

832
00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:23,800
Speaker 3: and make you want to take on the day. Ones

833
00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:26,160
Speaker 3: like this they have you on Reddit instead of doing

834
00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:29,520
Speaker 3: your duties, will never serve you and will never get

835
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:31,800
Speaker 3: you to where you want to be. You're too old

836
00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:33,719
Speaker 3: and have too much on your plate to even be

837
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:37,080
Speaker 3: thinking about this lame drama. You're losing sight of the

838
00:41:37,120 --> 00:41:41,280
Speaker 3: big picture, which is your professional future. Break up. Buckle

839
00:41:41,360 --> 00:41:43,880
Speaker 3: down with this lawyer, pass the class, get your career

840
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:48,280
Speaker 3: sorted out, then start thinking about dating. Coming two. Sorting

841
00:41:48,320 --> 00:41:50,840
Speaker 3: out your schooling will change your life. This guy seems

842
00:41:51,040 --> 00:41:53,799
Speaker 3: then on ruining it. Focus on the important one and

843
00:41:53,880 --> 00:41:56,839
Speaker 3: let the other go. Opie says, Yep, my dad has

844
00:41:56,880 --> 00:41:58,960
Speaker 3: said that from the start that this guy's here to

845
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:01,720
Speaker 3: make sure I will not past school and be dependent

846
00:42:01,760 --> 00:42:04,840
Speaker 3: on him so he can control me. Although my boyfriend

847
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 3: puts me down a lot about school and says our

848
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:10,319
Speaker 3: relationship suffers because of this, and he said my life

849
00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:13,080
Speaker 3: is bleeding into his because I can't hang out as

850
00:42:13,120 --> 00:42:16,640
Speaker 3: often or do fun things. Common to replies, why have

851
00:42:16,719 --> 00:42:19,200
Speaker 3: you not listened to your parents so far? Ope says,

852
00:42:19,360 --> 00:42:22,440
Speaker 3: that's a very good question. Logically, I know they're right,

853
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:25,240
Speaker 3: but I think years worth of this type of dating

854
00:42:25,280 --> 00:42:28,800
Speaker 3: similar partners has altered the chemistry of my brain, honestly,

855
00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:31,600
Speaker 3: and I guess I think I deserve this type of treatment.

856
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:35,600
Speaker 3: My parents truly weren't self absorbed or harmful, so I

857
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:37,600
Speaker 3: do think it's from dating so many men that have

858
00:42:37,640 --> 00:42:40,680
Speaker 3: been emotionally harmful towards me. That is true.

859
00:42:40,920 --> 00:42:43,479
Speaker 2: Once you get used to something, you just think that's

860
00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:44,120
Speaker 2: the way it is.

861
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,920
Speaker 3: Once school is settled, I'll be working with my therapists

862
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:50,360
Speaker 3: to try to resolve this. That's the end of that story.

863
00:42:50,880 --> 00:42:53,680
Speaker 2: Well, I hope you have very productive therapy sessions. It

864
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:57,279
Speaker 2: sounds like you have a lot of insight into your

865
00:42:57,320 --> 00:42:59,000
Speaker 2: own ways of being, and I.

866
00:42:58,960 --> 00:43:02,120
Speaker 3: Hope you have a right thirty first birthday. And that's

867
00:43:02,120 --> 00:43:03,680
Speaker 3: the end of this story. We're gonna go to the

868
00:43:03,719 --> 00:43:05,120
Speaker 3: next one.

869
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:10,120
Speaker 4: My sister's friend sabotaged my party planning, so I took control.

870
00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:11,840
Speaker 7: Don't mess with my parties.

871
00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:15,719
Speaker 4: My sister, twenty eight years old, is getting married next year,

872
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:19,279
Speaker 4: and it has been a complete whirlwind already. I love

873
00:43:19,320 --> 00:43:22,000
Speaker 4: her fiance and he is truly God's gift for her.

874
00:43:22,719 --> 00:43:26,239
Speaker 4: I could not even imagine a more loving and supportive

875
00:43:26,239 --> 00:43:28,720
Speaker 4: partner for her. By the way, this comes from username

876
00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:32,040
Speaker 4: specific Anything seventy five eighty three and if you want

877
00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:34,960
Speaker 4: to submit your own stories, go to our slash Okay

878
00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:38,600
Speaker 4: storytime subreddit. I'm Vincent, I'm Sophia, and we are here

879
00:43:38,680 --> 00:43:42,200
Speaker 4: to give good advice goofy, but we don't got all answers.

880
00:43:42,400 --> 00:43:43,960
Speaker 4: We just know what we would do op.

881
00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:44,440
Speaker 5: He says.

882
00:43:44,680 --> 00:43:46,839
Speaker 4: She couldn't decide who to make her maid of honor,

883
00:43:46,920 --> 00:43:51,279
Speaker 4: so she picked three maid of honors. Yes three, me,

884
00:43:51,640 --> 00:43:54,520
Speaker 4: my sister, and her forty year old friend. Will get

885
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:57,200
Speaker 4: into this. It was difficult at first trying to figure

886
00:43:57,239 --> 00:44:00,439
Speaker 4: out how to share duties, and then it became very

887
00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:03,840
Speaker 4: clear that her forty year old friend was strong arming

888
00:44:03,880 --> 00:44:08,239
Speaker 4: my sister and I out of every turn. I've suspected

889
00:44:08,280 --> 00:44:12,280
Speaker 4: her friend as a scammer or a self absorbed person

890
00:44:13,480 --> 00:44:17,200
Speaker 4: that's taking advantage of my sister. This quote unquote friend

891
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:20,560
Speaker 4: booked my sister and her now fiance travel through a

892
00:44:20,600 --> 00:44:24,280
Speaker 4: travel agent who is the forty year old's best friend,

893
00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:26,960
Speaker 4: and the crews ended up being double the cost of

894
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:32,120
Speaker 4: the crappy accommodations and terrible food. I worked with my

895
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:35,640
Speaker 4: sister bride to Bee and we made a Google doc

896
00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:38,920
Speaker 4: with fifteen plus bmbs mapped out four to five different

897
00:44:38,960 --> 00:44:44,800
Speaker 4: location possibilities, possible timelines, and possible attendees. We listed Cancun, Miami,

898
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:47,759
Speaker 4: New Orleans, Nashville, et cetera. She was so happy with

899
00:44:47,800 --> 00:44:49,719
Speaker 4: our work that she asked me to be the spearhead

900
00:44:49,719 --> 00:44:51,600
Speaker 4: of it, and I said yes.

901
00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 5: I sent a text to the.

902
00:44:52,800 --> 00:44:55,960
Speaker 4: Native Honor group chat, and all of a sudden, her

903
00:44:56,040 --> 00:44:59,360
Speaker 4: forty year old friend jumps in saying actually they already

904
00:44:59,360 --> 00:45:03,600
Speaker 4: had plans since April to do a one day at

905
00:45:03,600 --> 00:45:06,880
Speaker 4: Disney and stay in Orlando. I said, okay, if we

906
00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:09,719
Speaker 4: stay in Miami, I would drive to Disney for one

907
00:45:09,800 --> 00:45:12,800
Speaker 4: day and be the DD so we could take advantage

908
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:16,160
Speaker 4: of the beach, nightlife and batch activities in Miami. Her

909
00:45:16,160 --> 00:45:18,480
Speaker 4: forty year old friends said she didn't want to be

910
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:21,440
Speaker 4: in the car for over an hour, and the strong

911
00:45:21,560 --> 00:45:25,719
Speaker 4: arming started up again. Excuse after excuse. She pushed us

912
00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:29,720
Speaker 4: into Orlando, and my sister was agreeing with everything she said.

913
00:45:30,080 --> 00:45:32,279
Speaker 4: I called my eldest sister and asked if she was

914
00:45:32,360 --> 00:45:36,280
Speaker 4: going to let this happen and if she was okay

915
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,640
Speaker 4: with our sister having a lame bachelorette. My eldest sister

916
00:45:39,760 --> 00:45:43,760
Speaker 4: said she was wiping her hands and that's our sister's choice.

917
00:45:43,800 --> 00:45:48,239
Speaker 4: At the end of the day, I felt frustrated, rightly so,

918
00:45:49,280 --> 00:45:52,520
Speaker 4: because I felt like the only one who could see

919
00:45:52,520 --> 00:45:56,240
Speaker 4: that this woman was taking advantage of our sister. Weeks later,

920
00:45:56,360 --> 00:46:01,080
Speaker 4: we were locked into Orlando and guess what the villa is.

921
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:05,840
Speaker 4: Through the same travel agent friend, she sends a text

922
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:08,680
Speaker 4: to the party group chat and tells them nothing of

923
00:46:08,719 --> 00:46:12,479
Speaker 4: the location or timeline, but instead just demands everyone send

924
00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:15,799
Speaker 4: two hundred and sixty dollars today as we need to

925
00:46:15,880 --> 00:46:19,080
Speaker 4: lock in the house. My sister and I send money

926
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:23,000
Speaker 4: to help. Then the original ten girls start backing out

927
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:25,879
Speaker 4: one by one. Since then, the cost of the trip

928
00:46:25,920 --> 00:46:28,680
Speaker 4: has gone up, not just from people backing out, but

929
00:46:28,760 --> 00:46:32,000
Speaker 4: apparently until the total cost is paid off, the total

930
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:35,879
Speaker 4: cost of the villa will fluctuate higher. Now we're down

931
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:39,400
Speaker 4: five girls, and my sister and I have had to

932
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:42,640
Speaker 4: invite a friend of our own to try to fill

933
00:46:42,680 --> 00:46:46,560
Speaker 4: the spots. I told my sister this isn't worth progressing

934
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:50,320
Speaker 4: with the house that had ten bedrooms for only five girls,

935
00:46:50,560 --> 00:46:53,160
Speaker 4: and since the trip isn't until late April to may

936
00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:56,719
Speaker 4: we should back out. Turns out, the contract the forty

937
00:46:56,760 --> 00:46:59,600
Speaker 4: year old signed says that if we cancel even ninety

938
00:46:59,640 --> 00:47:01,960
Speaker 4: days in our advance, we may not receive a refund

939
00:47:02,160 --> 00:47:04,960
Speaker 4: of our security deposit and may have to pay an

940
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:08,960
Speaker 4: additional thirty to thirty five percent of the total package price.

941
00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:09,839
Speaker 5: On top of it.

942
00:47:09,920 --> 00:47:13,320
Speaker 4: We could submit a claim, but we could be denied.

943
00:47:13,880 --> 00:47:17,480
Speaker 7: I'm sorry, Wait, if you don't go, you not only

944
00:47:17,520 --> 00:47:21,760
Speaker 7: have to pay the initial price, but also more. That's

945
00:47:21,880 --> 00:47:22,920
Speaker 7: a full scam.

946
00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:25,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, full scam, and like three months ahead of time.

947
00:47:26,000 --> 00:47:28,520
Speaker 7: That's crazy, a damn scam scam.

948
00:47:28,560 --> 00:47:30,160
Speaker 4: I don't know if I'm gonna where I'm gonna be

949
00:47:30,160 --> 00:47:30,680
Speaker 4: in three months.

950
00:47:30,920 --> 00:47:32,239
Speaker 7: I have no idea I might not be there.

951
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:33,719
Speaker 4: Do you asked me where I was three months ago?

952
00:47:34,080 --> 00:47:34,719
Speaker 4: If i'd be here?

953
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:35,520
Speaker 5: What?

954
00:47:35,719 --> 00:47:35,959
Speaker 3: Huh?

955
00:47:36,040 --> 00:47:36,640
Speaker 2: Huh huh.

956
00:47:36,680 --> 00:47:38,640
Speaker 4: When we said we wanted to back out, the girl

957
00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:42,920
Speaker 4: said we can't. She told us that she bought insurance originally,

958
00:47:43,080 --> 00:47:46,600
Speaker 4: and when we asked if that would help, she said

959
00:47:47,000 --> 00:47:50,200
Speaker 4: the insurance would only cover someone being sick. I read

960
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:54,240
Speaker 4: the contract and it's horrendous. Toilet paper, paper, towels, et cetera.

961
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:57,760
Speaker 4: Were not included. If we asked to downsize the villa.

962
00:47:57,800 --> 00:48:00,359
Speaker 4: We will be charged as a cancelation, have to pay

963
00:48:00,360 --> 00:48:02,239
Speaker 4: a new price anyway, and have to pay a new

964
00:48:02,280 --> 00:48:05,880
Speaker 4: price anyway, plus an additional one hundred dollars per person.

965
00:48:06,040 --> 00:48:09,240
Speaker 4: My parents are livid. They said if we can't back out,

966
00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:12,400
Speaker 4: they'd pay. We had a meeting as a family with

967
00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:15,880
Speaker 4: the woman and it was very sketchy in sus She

968
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:18,480
Speaker 4: kept pushing us to keep the house and tried to

969
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:21,160
Speaker 4: make it seem like my sister and I weren't doing

970
00:48:21,200 --> 00:48:22,480
Speaker 4: anything to help plan.

971
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:24,120
Speaker 5: I came with.

972
00:48:24,200 --> 00:48:28,280
Speaker 4: Receipts and she seemed very shook. She was also surprised

973
00:48:28,440 --> 00:48:32,080
Speaker 4: I knew legal language and called her out on locking

974
00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:35,480
Speaker 4: us into a contract that she knew was this rigid.

975
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:38,359
Speaker 4: I said, before we continue planning, we need to see

976
00:48:38,400 --> 00:48:40,520
Speaker 4: if we can get out of this. Even if we

977
00:48:40,600 --> 00:48:44,360
Speaker 4: forfeit just the deposit, it's worth backing out. She kept pushing,

978
00:48:44,400 --> 00:48:48,839
Speaker 4: saying okay, and what if we can't get it back?

979
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:51,799
Speaker 4: And I said we shouldn't focus on that until we

980
00:48:51,840 --> 00:48:55,759
Speaker 4: have a definitive answer, because you said there's a possibility

981
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:58,799
Speaker 4: we could get out. She said she'd talk to her

982
00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:03,000
Speaker 4: friend and would date us on if we could back

983
00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:05,359
Speaker 4: out a day there, we got a text from our

984
00:49:05,400 --> 00:49:07,640
Speaker 4: sister saying that the forty year old called her friend

985
00:49:08,040 --> 00:49:11,120
Speaker 4: and the claim was denied. My dad was certain she's

986
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:14,719
Speaker 4: getting a punt back or a percentage off of this,

987
00:49:14,880 --> 00:49:17,360
Speaker 4: and wants nothing to do with her after this. But

988
00:49:17,480 --> 00:49:22,120
Speaker 4: I feel like too much has happened. I feel very defeated.

989
00:49:22,560 --> 00:49:25,359
Speaker 4: I feel like I can't sit here and watch this

990
00:49:25,600 --> 00:49:28,560
Speaker 4: car crash happen. Part of me wants to tell my

991
00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:31,560
Speaker 4: sister she has to choose me over the forty year

992
00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:35,400
Speaker 4: old and that only one of us can stay. I

993
00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:38,680
Speaker 4: do worry she'd pick her old raisin friend over me.

994
00:49:38,880 --> 00:49:41,680
Speaker 4: But I've reached the point where I can't take the

995
00:49:41,680 --> 00:49:42,279
Speaker 4: stress of this.

996
00:49:42,400 --> 00:49:44,360
Speaker 7: Did you go on an old raisin friend?

997
00:49:44,520 --> 00:49:49,440
Speaker 5: Yes? That is a quote from OPI her old raisin friend.

998
00:49:49,680 --> 00:49:52,040
Speaker 4: It's weird because she always comes in a red box.

999
00:49:52,080 --> 00:49:53,960
Speaker 7: She just loves raisin brand.

1000
00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:57,920
Speaker 4: It's a what's as a brand with that little that

1001
00:49:58,000 --> 00:50:00,480
Speaker 4: little like raisin girl with.

1002
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:01,319
Speaker 7: A little raisin girl.

1003
00:50:01,360 --> 00:50:04,279
Speaker 4: Well, it's like a it's a red box. But now

1004
00:50:04,280 --> 00:50:06,839
Speaker 4: I'm imagining it's her because it's like an old time

1005
00:50:06,880 --> 00:50:09,080
Speaker 4: she has a bonnet on. But I know imagine it.

1006
00:50:09,080 --> 00:50:12,279
Speaker 4: It's just her, but like thirty years down the road.

1007
00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:15,520
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, she's kinda she's gotten a little bit older now.

1008
00:50:15,920 --> 00:50:19,040
Speaker 4: The raisin grift has gone bad, so now she's having

1009
00:50:19,200 --> 00:50:21,680
Speaker 4: to resort to resort grifts.

1010
00:50:21,719 --> 00:50:23,719
Speaker 7: Someone else, Please buy my raisins.

1011
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:26,240
Speaker 4: I mean my raisins. I try to cover them and chocolate,

1012
00:50:26,280 --> 00:50:29,320
Speaker 4: but people just come and raising it. I also feel

1013
00:50:29,400 --> 00:50:33,440
Speaker 4: intense guilt for how crappy her friend is making this.

1014
00:50:34,040 --> 00:50:36,279
Speaker 4: My mom thinks this woman is using it as a

1015
00:50:36,320 --> 00:50:39,480
Speaker 4: way to take over since she's the only single, middle

1016
00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:43,120
Speaker 4: aged person and this is the closest she'll ever be

1017
00:50:43,280 --> 00:50:47,520
Speaker 4: to a wedding. She's never planned a bachelorette before, whereas

1018
00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:48,719
Speaker 4: my sister and I have.

1019
00:50:48,920 --> 00:50:49,560
Speaker 5: Hah.

1020
00:50:49,680 --> 00:50:51,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is super shady.

1021
00:50:51,680 --> 00:50:54,320
Speaker 7: Very shady, very shady indeed.

1022
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I would see if you can't talk to

1023
00:50:57,760 --> 00:51:01,480
Speaker 4: this friend's friend, yeah without her being the middleman.

1024
00:51:01,360 --> 00:51:04,279
Speaker 7: Yeah, because it seems like she just the friend. The

1025
00:51:04,280 --> 00:51:09,200
Speaker 7: forty year old friend is trying to flip everything. I

1026
00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:11,360
Speaker 7: don't know, can we get a lawyer involved?

1027
00:51:11,520 --> 00:51:15,160
Speaker 4: Well, Also like she's taking control by being the middleman, yeah,

1028
00:51:15,160 --> 00:51:17,959
Speaker 4: and doing things without okaying with you guys. So yeah,

1029
00:51:18,000 --> 00:51:20,839
Speaker 4: go over her head, take all her power. Away and

1030
00:51:20,920 --> 00:51:23,920
Speaker 4: then move from there. I am frustrated and need any

1031
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:27,520
Speaker 4: advice you can offer. Also apologize for the agism. I

1032
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:29,440
Speaker 4: am just angry and don't see what this forty year

1033
00:51:29,440 --> 00:51:31,839
Speaker 4: old woman could have in common with my twenty eight

1034
00:51:31,960 --> 00:51:39,080
Speaker 4: year old sister that she constantly infantilizes because of her autism.

1035
00:51:39,320 --> 00:51:42,479
Speaker 4: But we have some comments. Comment number one. I've never

1036
00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:45,919
Speaker 4: heard of an accommodation insisting that you have to pay

1037
00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:50,640
Speaker 4: when you're canceled four months in advance. Maybe it happens,

1038
00:51:50,760 --> 00:51:53,120
Speaker 4: but that's Luda Cris.

1039
00:51:53,320 --> 00:51:54,000
Speaker 5: We agree.

1040
00:51:54,239 --> 00:51:56,239
Speaker 4: Have you given her any more than two hundred and

1041
00:51:56,280 --> 00:51:59,480
Speaker 4: sixty dollars? Don't give her any more money. If somebody

1042
00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:01,560
Speaker 4: wants to try and get more money out of you

1043
00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:05,399
Speaker 4: for a rental you aren't using, tell them they can

1044
00:52:05,520 --> 00:52:08,480
Speaker 4: take you to court. It's certainly not worth it to

1045
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:12,279
Speaker 4: It's certainly not worth it to the property owner. It's

1046
00:52:12,400 --> 00:52:16,920
Speaker 4: more productive for them to just find another renter. If

1047
00:52:16,920 --> 00:52:19,520
Speaker 4: it were me, I would tell my sister I can

1048
00:52:19,600 --> 00:52:23,360
Speaker 4: no longer be your maid of honor. WTF? Who the

1049
00:52:23,560 --> 00:52:26,000
Speaker 4: f has three freaking maids of honor?

1050
00:52:26,440 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1051
00:52:26,680 --> 00:52:30,399
Speaker 4: And then pretty strange, that's really strange. Your sister needs

1052
00:52:30,440 --> 00:52:34,400
Speaker 4: to be more in the kitchen, many too many cooks.

1053
00:52:34,480 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 4: You get the reference, you know, I don't. It's a

1054
00:52:37,760 --> 00:52:39,920
Speaker 4: I'll show you after this it's a video, and then

1055
00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:42,520
Speaker 4: step back. I would advise my other sister to do

1056
00:52:42,600 --> 00:52:45,839
Speaker 4: the same, because it sounds like the bride isn't likely

1057
00:52:45,920 --> 00:52:50,160
Speaker 4: to be talked into dumping the forty year old Oh.

1058
00:52:50,120 --> 00:52:51,360
Speaker 5: P I know.

1059
00:52:52,480 --> 00:52:56,399
Speaker 4: My dad was so mad. He said, who who did

1060
00:52:56,440 --> 00:53:01,200
Speaker 4: you get this contract from the Corleones. He's a godfather fan.

1061
00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:04,560
Speaker 4: I don't think she'd drop her. She's convinced she's her

1062
00:53:04,600 --> 00:53:07,080
Speaker 4: best friend. I'm going to talk to her fiance, but

1063
00:53:07,239 --> 00:53:09,920
Speaker 4: I think my eldest sister and I just need to

1064
00:53:09,960 --> 00:53:14,120
Speaker 4: stand our ground. Comment number two. I think you and

1065
00:53:14,160 --> 00:53:16,440
Speaker 4: your mom and your dad need to sit down with

1066
00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:20,800
Speaker 4: your sister without her raisin friend and lay it out there,

1067
00:53:21,320 --> 00:53:25,000
Speaker 4: and lay it out there how she's using your sister

1068
00:53:25,239 --> 00:53:28,400
Speaker 4: for money even if she's not getting any or just

1069
00:53:28,480 --> 00:53:31,440
Speaker 4: a portion as a kickback, and that she doesn't have

1070
00:53:31,480 --> 00:53:34,480
Speaker 4: her best interests at heart, and that she's forty and

1071
00:53:34,520 --> 00:53:37,960
Speaker 4: your sister is twenty eight. You definitely should have stood

1072
00:53:37,960 --> 00:53:40,799
Speaker 4: your ground with her right from the start when you

1073
00:53:40,880 --> 00:53:43,400
Speaker 4: and the bride to be chose where to have a

1074
00:53:43,360 --> 00:53:46,719
Speaker 4: bachelorette party, and when she should have been shut down

1075
00:53:46,760 --> 00:53:49,719
Speaker 4: immediately for not allowing she should have been shut down

1076
00:53:49,920 --> 00:53:52,840
Speaker 4: immediately and not allowed to try to sway your sister.

1077
00:53:53,160 --> 00:53:55,480
Speaker 4: I don't think you need to ask your sister to

1078
00:53:55,560 --> 00:53:59,799
Speaker 4: choose between you and the quote unquote friend, but make

1079
00:53:59,840 --> 00:54:03,279
Speaker 4: it abundantly clear that you don't like or trust her,

1080
00:54:03,320 --> 00:54:07,080
Speaker 4: and that if your sister genuinely cares about what this

1081
00:54:07,200 --> 00:54:10,920
Speaker 4: woman has to offer, that you're also washing your hands

1082
00:54:10,960 --> 00:54:13,279
Speaker 4: of all of it. And her friend can handle all

1083
00:54:13,280 --> 00:54:16,399
Speaker 4: of the planning and can pay it all herself. That's

1084
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:16,879
Speaker 4: a good one.

1085
00:54:17,000 --> 00:54:18,920
Speaker 7: Yeah, make her pay for all this money that she

1086
00:54:19,200 --> 00:54:19,920
Speaker 7: freaking wasted.

1087
00:54:20,040 --> 00:54:22,799
Speaker 4: Yeah, if she's planning all this super expensive stuff, plan

1088
00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:24,960
Speaker 4: it with her money. At this point, it seems like

1089
00:54:25,000 --> 00:54:28,160
Speaker 4: your sister won't get a bachelorette party, and it's just

1090
00:54:28,239 --> 00:54:32,680
Speaker 4: depressing for her. Opie, I'm planning an Atlantic City bachelor

1091
00:54:32,680 --> 00:54:37,480
Speaker 4: party without the raisin because she's a big Gordon Ramsey fan.

1092
00:54:38,160 --> 00:54:40,200
Speaker 4: And we can go to the Heck's kitchen.

1093
00:54:40,520 --> 00:54:42,759
Speaker 7: Ooh, yeah, that's where.

1094
00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:45,400
Speaker 4: Uh there's a bunch of them, but this one's in

1095
00:54:45,840 --> 00:54:46,760
Speaker 4: Atlantic City.

1096
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:48,160
Speaker 7: Mmmmm cool.

1097
00:54:48,280 --> 00:54:51,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, have some good food. My parents said they'd help cover.

1098
00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:54,040
Speaker 4: We definitely need a formal sit down because this trip

1099
00:54:54,160 --> 00:54:58,360
Speaker 4: is going to cost almost sixteen hundred to two thousand

1100
00:54:58,480 --> 00:55:01,560
Speaker 4: per person for all only five of us. It just

1101
00:55:01,719 --> 00:55:05,840
Speaker 4: doesn't make sense when the original budget was eight hundred.

1102
00:55:06,120 --> 00:55:09,520
Speaker 4: We have a reply that's actually insane. But the fact

1103
00:55:09,520 --> 00:55:12,600
Speaker 4: that you all put down that much money with someone

1104
00:55:12,719 --> 00:55:17,080
Speaker 4: you already don't trust is crazy too. Oh Pee, I

1105
00:55:17,160 --> 00:55:19,800
Speaker 4: said this from the jump, and no one listened to me.

1106
00:55:20,640 --> 00:55:25,400
Speaker 4: We've only put in two hundred and sixty one dollars

1107
00:55:25,480 --> 00:55:30,000
Speaker 4: each because I was suspicious, but I'm not giving her

1108
00:55:30,040 --> 00:55:30,960
Speaker 4: any more money.

1109
00:55:31,040 --> 00:55:32,839
Speaker 5: Goood, nice, good, that's it.

1110
00:55:32,960 --> 00:55:35,759
Speaker 7: Yeah, I'm glad that you've only lost maybe lost if

1111
00:55:35,800 --> 00:55:37,759
Speaker 7: you can hopefully get it back, but you've only given

1112
00:55:37,800 --> 00:55:38,960
Speaker 7: away two hundred dollars.

1113
00:55:39,080 --> 00:55:41,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, and that's the end of this story. We're going

1114
00:55:41,160 --> 00:55:42,720
Speaker 3: to go to the next one.

1115
00:55:42,960 --> 00:55:44,040
Speaker 2: John here og host.

1116
00:55:44,160 --> 00:55:45,839
Speaker 4: We're gonna get back to these stories, but a quick

1117
00:55:45,880 --> 00:55:47,840
Speaker 4: three minute break from as for more sponsors.

1118
00:55:48,400 --> 00:55:51,480
Speaker 7: My father said, I ruined Christmas because I had a

1119
00:55:51,520 --> 00:55:52,280
Speaker 7: panic attack.

1120
00:55:52,520 --> 00:55:55,200
Speaker 4: Jingle h double hockey sticks.

1121
00:55:55,440 --> 00:55:59,120
Speaker 7: I thirty four female have a diagnosed anxiety disorder where

1122
00:55:59,160 --> 00:56:02,560
Speaker 7: I have severe your anxiety and panic attacks. I live

1123
00:56:02,640 --> 00:56:05,120
Speaker 7: in a northern state with my husband thirty four male,

1124
00:56:05,200 --> 00:56:09,000
Speaker 7: and two kids, one male and seven female. My father

1125
00:56:09,080 --> 00:56:12,400
Speaker 7: and stepmom are retired nurses who live in a southern state,

1126
00:56:12,880 --> 00:56:15,759
Speaker 7: and my grandparents live in Florida. The plan was to

1127
00:56:15,800 --> 00:56:18,240
Speaker 7: spend a week in Florida and on our way home

1128
00:56:18,360 --> 00:56:20,480
Speaker 7: stop at my dad's for a few days as the

1129
00:56:20,480 --> 00:56:22,919
Speaker 7: midway point to our house. By the way, this comes

1130
00:56:22,920 --> 00:56:25,440
Speaker 7: from Charming Football two seven to one, and if you

1131
00:56:25,480 --> 00:56:27,000
Speaker 7: want to submit your own stories, go to the r

1132
00:56:27,040 --> 00:56:28,680
Speaker 7: slash Okay story time supparate it.

1133
00:56:28,880 --> 00:56:31,440
Speaker 5: I'm Sophia, I'm Vincent, and we're here.

1134
00:56:31,280 --> 00:56:32,960
Speaker 7: To give good advice. Goofley, But we don't have all

1135
00:56:33,000 --> 00:56:35,360
Speaker 7: the answers. We only know what we'd do, So let

1136
00:56:35,440 --> 00:56:37,480
Speaker 7: us know what you would do in the comments and

1137
00:56:37,640 --> 00:56:40,839
Speaker 7: Obesas for Christmas this year, we drove my new car

1138
00:56:40,920 --> 00:56:44,759
Speaker 7: from our state to Florida and everything was exciting. We

1139
00:56:44,800 --> 00:56:47,239
Speaker 7: got to Florida a day ahead of schedule, where for

1140
00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:50,879
Speaker 7: Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, my dad and stepmom were

1141
00:56:50,880 --> 00:56:53,279
Speaker 7: going to come to my grandparents to spend Christmas with

1142
00:56:53,320 --> 00:56:56,800
Speaker 7: their grandkids. Since we got to Florida two days before

1143
00:56:56,880 --> 00:56:59,640
Speaker 7: Christmas Eve, we spent one day at the beach and

1144
00:56:59,719 --> 00:57:03,280
Speaker 7: had a wonderful time. On Christmas Eve morning, my husband

1145
00:57:03,280 --> 00:57:05,799
Speaker 7: decided to go to the store to get milk for

1146
00:57:05,880 --> 00:57:08,840
Speaker 7: our son before the store is closed early, and my

1147
00:57:08,960 --> 00:57:12,600
Speaker 7: car wouldn't start. It would not turn over or anything.

1148
00:57:13,160 --> 00:57:15,560
Speaker 7: I know a fair amount about cars from my stepdad,

1149
00:57:15,560 --> 00:57:18,320
Speaker 7: who taught me how to change my tires oil and

1150
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:21,920
Speaker 7: replace easy parts like belts and plugs, so I figured

1151
00:57:21,960 --> 00:57:25,040
Speaker 7: the issue was either my starter or something electrical. I

1152
00:57:25,080 --> 00:57:28,280
Speaker 7: started to panic, as I'm a teacher, and I started

1153
00:57:28,320 --> 00:57:30,960
Speaker 7: to mentally picture that I would be stuck in Florida

1154
00:57:31,520 --> 00:57:34,360
Speaker 7: and not be aback for work, and I started to panic.

1155
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:38,240
Speaker 7: My husband and grandparents know when I have severe panic attacks,

1156
00:57:38,680 --> 00:57:40,800
Speaker 7: it's best to let me walk away and have space

1157
00:57:40,840 --> 00:57:43,280
Speaker 7: to clear my head and not force me to come

1158
00:57:43,320 --> 00:57:46,320
Speaker 7: back and engage until I'm mentally ready to do so.

1159
00:57:46,320 --> 00:57:49,240
Speaker 7: So I walked and sat at the lake and cried

1160
00:57:49,600 --> 00:57:52,000
Speaker 7: and had my panic attack, and not too long after

1161
00:57:52,120 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 7: getting there, my stepmom and dad showed up, and my

1162
00:57:55,160 --> 00:57:57,840
Speaker 7: stepmom was kind and told me she understood and to

1163
00:57:57,880 --> 00:58:02,320
Speaker 7: take my time, but Dad, however, was not so kind. Dad,

1164
00:58:03,040 --> 00:58:05,200
Speaker 7: you need to get your crab together and stop acting

1165
00:58:05,320 --> 00:58:08,120
Speaker 7: like this. Me, Dad, I just need to pull myself

1166
00:58:08,160 --> 00:58:10,800
Speaker 7: together because this is a huge because this is causing

1167
00:58:10,800 --> 00:58:14,160
Speaker 7: a huge issue financially and even time wise, Like how

1168
00:58:14,200 --> 00:58:16,000
Speaker 7: are we going to get home as all shops are

1169
00:58:16,000 --> 00:58:19,040
Speaker 7: closed for the next three days? Dad, Well, you need

1170
00:58:19,080 --> 00:58:21,280
Speaker 7: to go back on meds or go doc to your therapist,

1171
00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:24,200
Speaker 7: because this is not how we behave Your husband is

1172
00:58:24,200 --> 00:58:26,000
Speaker 7: the car being towed to our shop? Who will look

1173
00:58:26,040 --> 00:58:28,240
Speaker 7: at it when they open? So we're going back to

1174
00:58:28,280 --> 00:58:31,120
Speaker 7: Grandma and Grandpa's out now. Since you're punishing your children

1175
00:58:31,200 --> 00:58:34,440
Speaker 7: and ruined the holiday, I don't argue and just go

1176
00:58:34,520 --> 00:58:37,720
Speaker 7: back since my husband has it covered, and since I

1177
00:58:37,840 --> 00:58:40,920
Speaker 7: was mentally exhausted, I just laid in my and my

1178
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:45,040
Speaker 7: husband's room and fell asleep. The next morning was Christmas,

1179
00:58:45,120 --> 00:58:47,840
Speaker 7: and despite the unknown about what was wrong with my car,

1180
00:58:48,520 --> 00:58:51,360
Speaker 7: I sat there and enjoyed the holidays with my kids,

1181
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:55,560
Speaker 7: watching them open presents from Santa and my grandparents. Prior

1182
00:58:55,600 --> 00:58:58,560
Speaker 7: to my dad coming to their house, I tried facetiming

1183
00:58:58,600 --> 00:59:01,480
Speaker 7: my mom to say Happy Christmas, but my mom told

1184
00:59:01,520 --> 00:59:03,480
Speaker 7: me that she and my stepdad were on their way

1185
00:59:03,520 --> 00:59:06,080
Speaker 7: to bury his mom, who just passed away of cam

1186
00:59:06,200 --> 00:59:09,600
Speaker 7: through the day prior so she'll FaceTime me later. Soon after,

1187
00:59:09,720 --> 00:59:12,400
Speaker 7: my dad and stepmom show up and the kids open

1188
00:59:12,480 --> 00:59:14,840
Speaker 7: gifts from them and we chat for a little and

1189
00:59:15,000 --> 00:59:17,480
Speaker 7: even though I'm still high on my anxiety where I'm

1190
00:59:17,520 --> 00:59:20,840
Speaker 7: still super anxious and unable to truly be happy until

1191
00:59:20,880 --> 00:59:23,520
Speaker 7: I know what was wrong with my car, as well

1192
00:59:23,560 --> 00:59:26,560
Speaker 7: as how much it will cost me to fix. Later

1193
00:59:26,640 --> 00:59:30,120
Speaker 7: that day, my grandparents' friends came over to do Christmas dinner,

1194
00:59:30,240 --> 00:59:32,040
Speaker 7: and I was sitting in one part of the house

1195
00:59:32,520 --> 00:59:34,760
Speaker 7: watching and playing with the one year old while my

1196
00:59:34,880 --> 00:59:38,240
Speaker 7: husband kept an eye on our seven year old. My grandparents'

1197
00:59:38,240 --> 00:59:41,360
Speaker 7: friends approached me and talked to me, knowing what was

1198
00:59:41,400 --> 00:59:45,160
Speaker 7: going on, but they still gave me space but still

1199
00:59:45,200 --> 00:59:48,760
Speaker 7: engaged me in conversation, understanding I was keeping my toddler

1200
00:59:48,760 --> 00:59:51,919
Speaker 7: from destroying my grandparent's house while they and my dad

1201
00:59:51,920 --> 00:59:56,560
Speaker 7: were cooking. The entire time I'm talking to, anyone approaches me.

1202
00:59:57,120 --> 01:00:00,640
Speaker 7: My dad and grandfather are outside cooking time, and my

1203
01:00:00,760 --> 01:00:02,840
Speaker 7: dad comes in and out of the house, giving me

1204
01:00:03,080 --> 01:00:06,960
Speaker 7: side glances as he passes that I notice, but I

1205
01:00:06,960 --> 01:00:09,680
Speaker 7: ignore as I focus on my son who's running around.

1206
01:00:10,480 --> 01:00:13,720
Speaker 7: My mom finally facetimes me and I sit with my

1207
01:00:13,800 --> 01:00:15,760
Speaker 7: kids on my lap as we talk to my mom

1208
01:00:15,800 --> 01:00:18,600
Speaker 7: and stepdad, and my dad is standing there in the

1209
01:00:18,640 --> 01:00:22,920
Speaker 7: doorway just staring at me. Eh, it's just like there

1210
01:00:22,960 --> 01:00:23,360
Speaker 7: you said.

1211
01:00:23,520 --> 01:00:25,800
Speaker 4: I'm scared, dad, give me your best, scary dad.

1212
01:00:27,320 --> 01:00:31,960
Speaker 7: I can't do it. I'll never be a scary dad. Dang.

1213
01:00:32,760 --> 01:00:35,520
Speaker 4: Hey, so fay you follow your dreams. You can be

1214
01:00:35,560 --> 01:00:36,920
Speaker 4: a scary dad if you won't.

1215
01:00:37,160 --> 01:00:40,440
Speaker 7: Thanks, Vincent, That's all. That's all I ever wanted.

1216
01:00:40,600 --> 01:00:42,040
Speaker 4: I believe in you all.

1217
01:00:42,440 --> 01:00:45,120
Speaker 7: I continue to ignore him as we talk to my mom,

1218
01:00:45,320 --> 01:00:47,840
Speaker 7: who talks about the burial and what happened, and then

1219
01:00:47,920 --> 01:00:51,600
Speaker 7: asks the kids about Christmas. After the kids were done,

1220
01:00:51,640 --> 01:00:54,200
Speaker 7: my mom asked me if my anxiety is high today,

1221
01:00:54,280 --> 01:00:56,400
Speaker 7: as she can see it on my face, and I

1222
01:00:56,520 --> 01:00:58,800
Speaker 7: vented about my car and she told me that things

1223
01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:01,080
Speaker 7: will work out and offered different things we can do.

1224
01:01:01,720 --> 01:01:04,720
Speaker 7: My mom listened and it made me feel better. My

1225
01:01:04,960 --> 01:01:07,880
Speaker 7: entire call with my mom lasted no more than ten minutes.

1226
01:01:08,480 --> 01:01:11,440
Speaker 7: Christmas dinner comes, and when my anxiety is high, I

1227
01:01:11,560 --> 01:01:15,040
Speaker 7: cannot eat or I get sick, so I focus on

1228
01:01:15,080 --> 01:01:17,760
Speaker 7: making sure my kids are fed and bathed, et cetera.

1229
01:01:18,440 --> 01:01:21,800
Speaker 7: After my grandparents' friends leave, my dad finally comes up

1230
01:01:21,800 --> 01:01:24,880
Speaker 7: to me and shakes his head as he looks at me. Dad,

1231
01:01:25,560 --> 01:01:30,640
Speaker 7: you need to get your anxiety under control me. I'm sorry, Dad,

1232
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:32,400
Speaker 7: you need to get on meds and get help, but

1233
01:01:32,440 --> 01:01:36,400
Speaker 7: this is not working. You were so rude and ignored everyone.

1234
01:01:37,160 --> 01:01:40,200
Speaker 7: I didn't reply as I felt an anxiety attack building

1235
01:01:40,640 --> 01:01:43,600
Speaker 7: because I thought I was talking to people and I

1236
01:01:43,720 --> 01:01:46,720
Speaker 7: thought I was not acting moody. I just got up

1237
01:01:46,760 --> 01:01:49,400
Speaker 7: and went into my and my husband's room and had

1238
01:01:49,640 --> 01:01:53,360
Speaker 7: my anxiety attack. I went into full flight mode and

1239
01:01:53,440 --> 01:01:56,280
Speaker 7: wanted to leave. I cried to my husband that I

1240
01:01:56,320 --> 01:01:58,600
Speaker 7: wanted to call an uber and have them bring me

1241
01:01:58,680 --> 01:02:01,560
Speaker 7: to an airport to fly home, as I can't do

1242
01:02:01,640 --> 01:02:05,160
Speaker 7: anything right when I was watching my kids and still

1243
01:02:05,200 --> 01:02:08,240
Speaker 7: talking to people, But apparently I must have been living

1244
01:02:08,240 --> 01:02:11,840
Speaker 7: in some altered reality where it never happened. He just, yeah,

1245
01:02:11,840 --> 01:02:13,520
Speaker 7: this is it, This is it, toughy.

1246
01:02:13,440 --> 01:02:17,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is I'm sorry that this is something that

1247
01:02:17,480 --> 01:02:21,000
Speaker 4: Opie's had for a long time. Yeah, like the parents,

1248
01:02:21,480 --> 01:02:23,920
Speaker 4: it doesn't sound like your dad's really well equipped to

1249
01:02:24,040 --> 01:02:24,520
Speaker 4: handle it.

1250
01:02:24,600 --> 01:02:27,920
Speaker 7: No, it doesn't sound like he wants to learn you

1251
01:02:27,920 --> 01:02:30,720
Speaker 7: know what you need, whereas your mom seems like pretty

1252
01:02:30,800 --> 01:02:34,120
Speaker 7: understanding yeah, but yeah, your dad just wants to make

1253
01:02:34,160 --> 01:02:34,560
Speaker 7: it worse.

1254
01:02:34,840 --> 01:02:38,560
Speaker 4: Well, I see this with sometimes just like they just

1255
01:02:38,600 --> 01:02:41,800
Speaker 4: wanted to go away. Yeah, and like just and I

1256
01:02:42,120 --> 01:02:45,400
Speaker 4: understand the whole like from his point of view, like, oh,

1257
01:02:45,440 --> 01:02:50,040
Speaker 4: you're so stressed about this thing that like you can't

1258
01:02:50,040 --> 01:02:51,720
Speaker 4: do anything. Like some people will be like, oh, I

1259
01:02:51,760 --> 01:02:55,120
Speaker 4: can't do anything about this thing right now, therefore I'm

1260
01:02:55,120 --> 01:02:58,160
Speaker 4: not going to stress about it. Yeah, that's not everybody now,

1261
01:02:58,600 --> 01:03:00,880
Speaker 4: and your dad needs to be to know, like, Okay,

1262
01:03:01,200 --> 01:03:02,800
Speaker 4: the way you handle that is different.

1263
01:03:03,080 --> 01:03:06,160
Speaker 7: Yeah. Through the door, while I was having my anxiety attack,

1264
01:03:06,280 --> 01:03:09,240
Speaker 7: I could hear my dad talking about me to my grandmother,

1265
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:12,040
Speaker 7: who is not engaging in the conversation, as well as

1266
01:03:12,120 --> 01:03:15,240
Speaker 7: in front of my seven year old dad. I have

1267
01:03:15,480 --> 01:03:17,840
Speaker 7: seen this at the mental hospitals all the time when

1268
01:03:17,880 --> 01:03:20,280
Speaker 7: I was a nurse. It's all an act for attention.

1269
01:03:20,600 --> 01:03:22,440
Speaker 7: She was all fine to talk to her mother, but

1270
01:03:22,520 --> 01:03:25,280
Speaker 7: not to talk to anyone else. She's choosing her to

1271
01:03:25,320 --> 01:03:27,800
Speaker 7: talk to and this is all an act. She needs

1272
01:03:27,880 --> 01:03:30,440
Speaker 7: mental help and it's got armor. Kids. They're going to

1273
01:03:30,480 --> 01:03:32,960
Speaker 7: be mentally messed up because of her. I sat in

1274
01:03:33,000 --> 01:03:35,440
Speaker 7: our room crying while my husband went to deal with

1275
01:03:35,480 --> 01:03:38,320
Speaker 7: my dad, and I don't know the full conversation, but

1276
01:03:38,400 --> 01:03:41,080
Speaker 7: what my husband told me as a summary is that

1277
01:03:41,120 --> 01:03:43,640
Speaker 7: he told my dad that he should not have said that,

1278
01:03:44,400 --> 01:03:47,680
Speaker 7: but should have asked if I'm okay and not burate

1279
01:03:47,800 --> 01:03:50,800
Speaker 7: me and my dad point Blake told my husband that

1280
01:03:50,920 --> 01:03:53,840
Speaker 7: until I apologize to the people are wronged, I'm not

1281
01:03:53,920 --> 01:03:56,720
Speaker 7: welcome at his house. My stepmom stopped in our room

1282
01:03:56,720 --> 01:03:59,640
Speaker 7: before leaving and told me she sees how I feel,

1283
01:03:59,680 --> 01:04:02,160
Speaker 7: and to me, my dad doesn't mean what he says,

1284
01:04:02,280 --> 01:04:04,280
Speaker 7: and let him cool down and he'll see how he

1285
01:04:04,400 --> 01:04:07,120
Speaker 7: was wrong and he'll call me in a few days.

1286
01:04:07,440 --> 01:04:10,080
Speaker 7: And told me not to reach out until he does,

1287
01:04:10,560 --> 01:04:12,560
Speaker 7: which I agreed, as when he used to get mad

1288
01:04:12,560 --> 01:04:14,600
Speaker 7: at my brother and I as kids, he would usually

1289
01:04:14,640 --> 01:04:17,520
Speaker 7: reach out two days later to talk it out. Fast

1290
01:04:17,560 --> 01:04:20,680
Speaker 7: forward to New Year's Eve. My car finally got fixed.

1291
01:04:20,760 --> 01:04:23,480
Speaker 7: That day long story with the car, but I had

1292
01:04:23,520 --> 01:04:27,600
Speaker 7: squirrels using my car's engine compartment as storage for pine cones.

1293
01:04:27,840 --> 01:04:31,000
Speaker 4: I've had that happen before. What I used to sometimes

1294
01:04:31,040 --> 01:04:34,400
Speaker 4: like the lining on wires, Yeah, is also really tasty

1295
01:04:34,480 --> 01:04:37,200
Speaker 4: to rodents. So I had squirrels and rabbits coming in

1296
01:04:37,280 --> 01:04:39,920
Speaker 4: and it'd like clip my starter wire. He did it

1297
01:04:39,920 --> 01:04:44,680
Speaker 4: three times with me, No, No, it's real, yeah.

1298
01:04:44,440 --> 01:04:47,680
Speaker 7: Oh my goodness, it's just their little pine cone compartment

1299
01:04:48,200 --> 01:04:50,880
Speaker 7: and it caused fuses to melt into the fuse box,

1300
01:04:50,880 --> 01:04:54,280
Speaker 7: which in turn caused my car to not start. Thankfully,

1301
01:04:54,320 --> 01:04:56,400
Speaker 7: insurance covered it all. And at this point I was

1302
01:04:56,440 --> 01:04:59,360
Speaker 7: over the whole vacation as we were less than four

1303
01:04:59,440 --> 01:05:02,320
Speaker 7: days before or when we needed to be home and

1304
01:05:02,400 --> 01:05:04,960
Speaker 7: have not heard from my dad, so I said, let's

1305
01:05:05,000 --> 01:05:07,720
Speaker 7: go home. I booked a hotel for the next night

1306
01:05:07,800 --> 01:05:10,680
Speaker 7: in a neighboring state to ours, hoping we would be

1307
01:05:10,760 --> 01:05:13,120
Speaker 7: able to stop and stay with my dad as it's

1308
01:05:13,200 --> 01:05:16,440
Speaker 7: the midpoint. It was six days since the whole situation

1309
01:05:16,560 --> 01:05:19,840
Speaker 7: with my dad and I've not heard anything. So as

1310
01:05:19,880 --> 01:05:23,080
Speaker 7: we drove home, my husband texted my dad telling him

1311
01:05:23,080 --> 01:05:25,480
Speaker 7: we were heading home as the car is finally fixed,

1312
01:05:25,520 --> 01:05:27,400
Speaker 7: and asked if we were welcome to stay the night

1313
01:05:27,440 --> 01:05:31,040
Speaker 7: before heading home, and my dad texted back, you and

1314
01:05:31,080 --> 01:05:34,360
Speaker 7: the kids are, but your wife's not until she apologizes

1315
01:05:34,400 --> 01:05:37,480
Speaker 7: for rudy Christmas to me. My husband did not reply

1316
01:05:37,600 --> 01:05:40,760
Speaker 7: and reassured me that I didn't ruin Christmas and he

1317
01:05:40,920 --> 01:05:43,880
Speaker 7: started it and should not have so, and he started

1318
01:05:43,880 --> 01:05:46,880
Speaker 7: it and should not have. So we decided to drive

1319
01:05:46,960 --> 01:05:49,720
Speaker 7: past his house and drive to the following state to

1320
01:05:49,760 --> 01:05:52,520
Speaker 7: a hotel. We left the next morning, and I was

1321
01:05:52,600 --> 01:05:55,120
Speaker 7: courteous to my family as I was raised to keep

1322
01:05:55,120 --> 01:05:57,680
Speaker 7: a family in the loop when we were traveling, and

1323
01:05:57,840 --> 01:06:00,480
Speaker 7: texted my family text chain we have had go since

1324
01:06:00,520 --> 01:06:03,640
Speaker 7: my grandma got a smartphone. Hey, we're leaving town heading

1325
01:06:03,680 --> 01:06:06,800
Speaker 7: to the other town. My in law, stepmom, and grandparents

1326
01:06:06,800 --> 01:06:11,400
Speaker 7: all said, okay, drive safe. My dad separately texted me,

1327
01:06:12,200 --> 01:06:14,360
Speaker 7: I don't care when you get home and want to

1328
01:06:14,400 --> 01:06:16,880
Speaker 7: be an adult and have an adult conversation about how

1329
01:06:16,920 --> 01:06:20,240
Speaker 7: you ruined Christmas. Will do so over the phone, not

1330
01:06:20,320 --> 01:06:23,760
Speaker 7: texting like a child. What child's are out here?

1331
01:06:24,040 --> 01:06:26,480
Speaker 4: Also, Dad, you're saying that over text?

1332
01:06:26,560 --> 01:06:27,000
Speaker 7: Yeah?

1333
01:06:27,040 --> 01:06:28,560
Speaker 2: Literally, you're texting er what?

1334
01:06:28,960 --> 01:06:30,880
Speaker 7: And also like I feel like he's imagining like a

1335
01:06:30,880 --> 01:06:32,880
Speaker 7: little baby, like what babies are texting?

1336
01:06:33,040 --> 01:06:33,280
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1337
01:06:33,360 --> 01:06:35,360
Speaker 7: This makes sense? Good text like an adult man.

1338
01:06:35,520 --> 01:06:37,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, get out of here, Dad?

1339
01:06:37,440 --> 01:06:37,880
Speaker 5: The heck?

1340
01:06:38,000 --> 01:06:40,720
Speaker 7: So I'm here still not calling my dad, but I

1341
01:06:40,760 --> 01:06:44,680
Speaker 7: want to know. Am I the a hole for ruining Christmas?

1342
01:06:44,760 --> 01:06:46,840
Speaker 7: And there is an update? But what do you say?

1343
01:06:46,920 --> 01:06:47,320
Speaker 3: Vincent?

1344
01:06:47,960 --> 01:06:52,600
Speaker 4: Reacting the way you do, and like if he can't

1345
01:06:52,640 --> 01:06:59,000
Speaker 4: handle that, it sounds like something something triggered. Yeah, your dad. Yeah,

1346
01:06:59,040 --> 01:07:03,280
Speaker 4: and that is not your fault, that's his fault and

1347
01:07:03,360 --> 01:07:04,720
Speaker 4: he needs to do some work on that.

1348
01:07:05,040 --> 01:07:08,440
Speaker 7: I feel like maybe the best way to handle him

1349
01:07:09,000 --> 01:07:11,760
Speaker 7: is working on every time. So like every time you're

1350
01:07:11,800 --> 01:07:15,800
Speaker 7: dealing with anxiety and stuff and he is just being rude,

1351
01:07:17,120 --> 01:07:21,280
Speaker 7: just kind of responding as neutrally as possible. If he

1352
01:07:21,320 --> 01:07:23,200
Speaker 7: says you're running Christmas and say, oh, well, you know,

1353
01:07:23,200 --> 01:07:25,600
Speaker 7: I'm sorry you feel that way, just leap at that. Oh,

1354
01:07:25,760 --> 01:07:28,560
Speaker 7: like you need to grow up, you know, sorry you

1355
01:07:28,560 --> 01:07:29,040
Speaker 7: feel that way.

1356
01:07:29,080 --> 01:07:31,560
Speaker 4: I'm sorry that you that your Christmas is being ruined.

1357
01:07:31,640 --> 01:07:33,560
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry that you're not having a good Christmas.

1358
01:07:33,680 --> 01:07:33,760
Speaker 3: Ye.

1359
01:07:34,080 --> 01:07:35,720
Speaker 7: Just like I'll put it all back on him, Like

1360
01:07:35,760 --> 01:07:40,480
Speaker 7: every time he's like you did this, Oh, I'm sorry that, Like, I'm.

1361
01:07:40,280 --> 01:07:42,040
Speaker 4: Sorry that you feel like I was being rude to you.

1362
01:07:42,240 --> 01:07:46,080
Speaker 7: Yeah yeah, just flip it and don't even engage in

1363
01:07:46,120 --> 01:07:50,360
Speaker 7: the conversation. Literally, just be like, oh, sorry you're feeling this, Oh,

1364
01:07:50,440 --> 01:07:52,800
Speaker 7: so I'm sorry that's happened to you. Just don't even

1365
01:07:52,880 --> 01:07:55,439
Speaker 7: acknowledge you have any part in this, because you don't.

1366
01:07:55,760 --> 01:07:58,760
Speaker 7: He is going through a lot of emotions and is

1367
01:07:58,840 --> 01:08:04,320
Speaker 7: letting your individual struggles that you are not putting on

1368
01:08:04,400 --> 01:08:07,000
Speaker 7: other people to affect him so deeply.

1369
01:08:08,200 --> 01:08:10,560
Speaker 4: So is someone having some big feelings.

1370
01:08:10,640 --> 01:08:12,480
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's really really gentle parandem.

1371
01:08:12,920 --> 01:08:15,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, sometimes you gotta do that update.

1372
01:08:15,360 --> 01:08:18,080
Speaker 7: My dad never acted like this towards me before, nor

1373
01:08:18,120 --> 01:08:21,360
Speaker 7: has he seen my anxiety attacks before. He lives in

1374
01:08:21,400 --> 01:08:23,840
Speaker 7: a world of denial. Mental health is in a thing,

1375
01:08:24,000 --> 01:08:26,080
Speaker 7: and we suppress our emotions and bury it down and

1376
01:08:26,120 --> 01:08:30,000
Speaker 7: move on. My dad has retired travel nurse for mentally

1377
01:08:30,000 --> 01:08:33,479
Speaker 7: disabled people, so his denial of mental health and his

1378
01:08:33,920 --> 01:08:37,040
Speaker 7: attitude makes me sad for any of his patients if

1379
01:08:37,040 --> 01:08:38,760
Speaker 7: this is how he treats me when I'm having an

1380
01:08:38,800 --> 01:08:41,559
Speaker 7: anxiety attack. My dad and my mom divorced when I

1381
01:08:41,640 --> 01:08:43,280
Speaker 7: was three and my dad was more of a two

1382
01:08:43,320 --> 01:08:46,200
Speaker 7: weekends a month dad, and I remember calling him when

1383
01:08:46,240 --> 01:08:48,720
Speaker 7: I was younger, begging to stay with him when my

1384
01:08:48,760 --> 01:08:53,400
Speaker 7: mom was emotionally and psychologically harmful towards me, and my

1385
01:08:53,520 --> 01:08:56,000
Speaker 7: dad would give me every and any excuse to not

1386
01:08:56,040 --> 01:08:58,759
Speaker 7: take me in, and in a way, he only wanted

1387
01:08:58,800 --> 01:09:01,080
Speaker 7: to be a parent when it was his time, but

1388
01:09:01,280 --> 01:09:05,799
Speaker 7: not to actually be a parent. Yes, I have tried

1389
01:09:05,840 --> 01:09:08,840
Speaker 7: different anxiety meds you name it, I've been on it,

1390
01:09:09,560 --> 01:09:12,120
Speaker 7: and they add such severe side effects on me to

1391
01:09:12,160 --> 01:09:15,160
Speaker 7: the point where I was hospitalized, and meds are not

1392
01:09:15,200 --> 01:09:17,720
Speaker 7: for me. My therapist has given me more help than

1393
01:09:17,760 --> 01:09:21,720
Speaker 7: any medication ever will, and that's my opinion. Yes, I

1394
01:09:21,800 --> 01:09:25,080
Speaker 7: have a therapist thirteen years in counting from my self

1395
01:09:25,120 --> 01:09:28,679
Speaker 7: absorbed person mother. They even said meds are not for everyone,

1396
01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:31,920
Speaker 7: and they have given me many coping mechanisms that help

1397
01:09:32,120 --> 01:09:34,920
Speaker 7: more when I have the time to do them. And yes,

1398
01:09:35,160 --> 01:09:38,160
Speaker 7: walking away from whatever is triggering an episode is a

1399
01:09:38,160 --> 01:09:41,120
Speaker 7: healthy way to deal rather than standing there and suffering.

1400
01:09:41,640 --> 01:09:43,720
Speaker 7: As of today, I have not heard anything and I'm

1401
01:09:43,760 --> 01:09:46,280
Speaker 7: okay with that. I do not plan to contact him since,

1402
01:09:46,320 --> 01:09:48,800
Speaker 7: as it was pointed out by my husband, my dad

1403
01:09:48,880 --> 01:09:51,960
Speaker 7: is a giant child and I don't owe him any apology,

1404
01:09:52,400 --> 01:09:56,000
Speaker 7: but he owes me one for knowingly attacking me and

1405
01:09:56,040 --> 01:10:00,120
Speaker 7: making everything worse just for him to victimize himself. We

1406
01:10:00,200 --> 01:10:02,920
Speaker 7: typically normally never talk a lot. It was like I

1407
01:10:03,040 --> 01:10:05,960
Speaker 7: once in a month thing to check in, and I'm

1408
01:10:06,040 --> 01:10:08,160
Speaker 7: used to not talking to him, and I'll keep it

1409
01:10:08,200 --> 01:10:11,000
Speaker 7: that way. I did call my therapist when I got

1410
01:10:11,000 --> 01:10:13,840
Speaker 7: home and told them what happened, and they agreed that

1411
01:10:13,880 --> 01:10:16,439
Speaker 7: my dad's swooping in before I got a chance to

1412
01:10:16,520 --> 01:10:18,960
Speaker 7: use any of my coping mechanisms in the end is

1413
01:10:19,000 --> 01:10:21,519
Speaker 7: what made things worse. Yeah, so Opie didn't even have

1414
01:10:21,560 --> 01:10:24,800
Speaker 7: the chance to self soothe in a way, you know, he.

1415
01:10:24,880 --> 01:10:27,200
Speaker 4: Just kind of hopped on you at the beach and

1416
01:10:27,360 --> 01:10:28,559
Speaker 4: was like, you're ruining stuff.

1417
01:10:30,000 --> 01:10:33,880
Speaker 7: They called it targeted victimization, where my dad intentionally made

1418
01:10:33,920 --> 01:10:37,120
Speaker 7: it worse and poked and pushed so he could act

1419
01:10:37,200 --> 01:10:40,320
Speaker 7: like he was a victim even though he was intentionally

1420
01:10:40,360 --> 01:10:45,000
Speaker 7: putting me in more danger and causing more damage. Honestly, though,

1421
01:10:45,080 --> 01:10:47,080
Speaker 7: I'm sure if I was able to walk away and

1422
01:10:47,160 --> 01:10:51,320
Speaker 7: use my coping mechanisms to calm and rationalize things, this

1423
01:10:51,360 --> 01:10:54,439
Speaker 7: whole story would have ended differently. But that didn't happen.

1424
01:10:55,280 --> 01:10:58,599
Speaker 7: I did send his nasty text to my grandmother, and

1425
01:10:58,640 --> 01:11:01,040
Speaker 7: she also apologized for what my dad said to me,

1426
01:11:01,600 --> 01:11:04,840
Speaker 7: and she said parents will never hate their children, and

1427
01:11:04,920 --> 01:11:07,599
Speaker 7: I'll come around once he realizes what he has done

1428
01:11:08,040 --> 01:11:11,519
Speaker 7: and what he's lost, though I know she's disappointed in him,

1429
01:11:11,880 --> 01:11:14,479
Speaker 7: So I'm going to accept who my dad is. But

1430
01:11:14,560 --> 01:11:17,280
Speaker 7: I'm not taking the step to contact him, and I'm

1431
01:11:17,320 --> 01:11:21,400
Speaker 7: okay with never talking to him. It's his loss, not mine.

1432
01:11:21,479 --> 01:11:25,439
Speaker 7: And there is a second update any thoughts.

1433
01:11:25,240 --> 01:11:28,639
Speaker 4: It's good that you sent it to your grandma, Yeah,

1434
01:11:28,680 --> 01:11:31,280
Speaker 4: and that she's on your side.

1435
01:11:31,880 --> 01:11:32,200
Speaker 5: Yeah.

1436
01:11:32,240 --> 01:11:33,960
Speaker 4: This isn't on you.

1437
01:11:33,479 --> 01:11:37,720
Speaker 7: No, I like, it's just constantly reminding yourself that your

1438
01:11:37,760 --> 01:11:39,920
Speaker 7: dad is his own issues that he's dealing with that

1439
01:11:40,000 --> 01:11:42,320
Speaker 7: he clearly does not want to go to a therapist

1440
01:11:42,640 --> 01:11:44,800
Speaker 7: or doctor four because he doesn't believe.

1441
01:11:44,520 --> 01:11:47,400
Speaker 4: In that even though he works in that system, which

1442
01:11:47,439 --> 01:11:48,160
Speaker 4: is crazy.

1443
01:11:48,320 --> 01:11:53,439
Speaker 7: But uh, you are, you know, working through this, You

1444
01:11:53,520 --> 01:11:57,400
Speaker 7: are getting help for it and the old that is

1445
01:11:57,439 --> 01:12:00,519
Speaker 7: the only thing that matters is that you are working

1446
01:12:00,520 --> 01:12:03,080
Speaker 7: on improving yourself and your.

1447
01:12:03,040 --> 01:12:03,479
Speaker 3: Dad is not.

1448
01:12:03,800 --> 01:12:04,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, good for you.

1449
01:12:05,160 --> 01:12:05,559
Speaker 3: Update.

1450
01:12:05,880 --> 01:12:08,280
Speaker 7: So it's been almost a year since this whole ordeal

1451
01:12:08,320 --> 01:12:11,320
Speaker 7: and I have some updates, but nothing exciting one as

1452
01:12:11,400 --> 01:12:15,439
Speaker 7: my father reached out to me to apologize or move on, Nope,

1453
01:12:16,080 --> 01:12:19,839
Speaker 7: complete silence. In February, I found out I was pregnant

1454
01:12:19,840 --> 01:12:23,240
Speaker 7: with my final baby and didn't announce it until June

1455
01:12:23,320 --> 01:12:26,080
Speaker 7: when I was nineteen weeks to ensure everything was okay.

1456
01:12:26,720 --> 01:12:28,600
Speaker 7: I didn't feel the need to let my dad know,

1457
01:12:29,000 --> 01:12:32,120
Speaker 7: because he never reached out at this point. And after

1458
01:12:32,200 --> 01:12:34,840
Speaker 7: I posted, I got a message from my stepmother on

1459
01:12:34,880 --> 01:12:37,680
Speaker 7: my dad's behalf. She tried to tell me that I

1460
01:12:37,680 --> 01:12:40,040
Speaker 7: should have told my dad that I was pregnant again

1461
01:12:40,479 --> 01:12:43,160
Speaker 7: before I announced it, and he has a right to know.

1462
01:12:44,120 --> 01:12:46,439
Speaker 7: I clap back and told her my dad does not

1463
01:12:46,720 --> 01:12:49,080
Speaker 7: get to pick and choose to be in and out

1464
01:12:49,120 --> 01:12:52,120
Speaker 7: of my kids' lives and only play victim because he

1465
01:12:52,160 --> 01:12:55,759
Speaker 7: thinks he's entitled to my kids. Since then, my dad

1466
01:12:55,760 --> 01:12:58,679
Speaker 7: sent a birthday present to my oldest but never called

1467
01:12:58,840 --> 01:13:02,599
Speaker 7: or texted her, never sent a car to my two

1468
01:13:02,640 --> 01:13:05,160
Speaker 7: year old when his birthday rolled around, so he either

1469
01:13:05,280 --> 01:13:09,320
Speaker 7: forgot or truly didn't care about my son. During this time,

1470
01:13:09,439 --> 01:13:13,960
Speaker 7: my bonus dad got diagnosed with stage four pancreatic OOH

1471
01:13:14,160 --> 01:13:16,839
Speaker 7: and was taking a bad turn. So I was driving

1472
01:13:16,840 --> 01:13:19,760
Speaker 7: out to see him and out my mom every other day.

1473
01:13:20,040 --> 01:13:23,160
Speaker 7: That's so devastating because he just lost his mom. Yeah,

1474
01:13:23,200 --> 01:13:25,759
Speaker 7: and then you know to have as well.

1475
01:13:26,080 --> 01:13:30,479
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's that's a rough gosh. But also, your dad

1476
01:13:30,520 --> 01:13:33,080
Speaker 4: doesn't have any right. He's like, I have a right

1477
01:13:33,160 --> 01:13:33,400
Speaker 4: to know.

1478
01:13:33,600 --> 01:13:34,400
Speaker 7: He No, he doesn't.

1479
01:13:34,560 --> 01:13:36,439
Speaker 4: You you kind of threw that away when you didn't

1480
01:13:36,479 --> 01:13:38,200
Speaker 4: treat me well and when.

1481
01:13:38,040 --> 01:13:39,840
Speaker 7: You haven't tried to apologize a year.

1482
01:13:40,000 --> 01:13:44,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, there's been radio silence, no support system from your

1483
01:13:44,320 --> 01:13:45,280
Speaker 4: father at this point.

1484
01:13:45,439 --> 01:13:47,720
Speaker 7: Nope. I did find out he was in town for

1485
01:13:47,760 --> 01:13:50,160
Speaker 7: a week while I was driving back and forth, but

1486
01:13:50,240 --> 01:13:52,439
Speaker 7: I only found out for my brother, who I was

1487
01:13:52,520 --> 01:13:54,960
Speaker 7: distanced from prior to my dad deciding to be a

1488
01:13:55,000 --> 01:13:59,440
Speaker 7: self absorbed manchild. My brother we ashed out our differences

1489
01:13:59,479 --> 01:14:01,519
Speaker 7: and found out everything we were upset about at the

1490
01:14:01,520 --> 01:14:04,760
Speaker 7: other was because my dad was feeding us lies about

1491
01:14:04,760 --> 01:14:06,760
Speaker 7: the other to make us mad and hate on each other.

1492
01:14:07,040 --> 01:14:08,280
Speaker 4: Wait what what?

1493
01:14:09,080 --> 01:14:13,960
Speaker 7: Yeah? Oh wow, your dad really sucks. Yeah, no contact.

1494
01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:16,840
Speaker 4: He's not only like he's manipulated.

1495
01:14:17,000 --> 01:14:21,000
Speaker 7: Yeah, whoa no contact. He was thriving on us hating

1496
01:14:21,040 --> 01:14:23,880
Speaker 7: one another, and he was forcing this wedge to create

1497
01:14:23,920 --> 01:14:28,000
Speaker 7: more chaos. He never reached out to talk. Stepmom reached

1498
01:14:28,000 --> 01:14:30,040
Speaker 7: out last minute, saying she and Dad were in town

1499
01:14:30,120 --> 01:14:33,360
Speaker 7: if I wanted to hash things out, and I never responded.

1500
01:14:34,280 --> 01:14:38,840
Speaker 7: In August, my bonus dad passed away of kire oh suddenly,

1501
01:14:38,920 --> 01:14:40,680
Speaker 7: and I was willing to reach out to my dad

1502
01:14:40,760 --> 01:14:45,439
Speaker 7: because the loss unlive me. He has me blocked so

1503
01:14:45,600 --> 01:14:48,799
Speaker 7: since then my last baby was born, and I realized

1504
01:14:48,840 --> 01:14:51,320
Speaker 7: all my anxiety and stress was all caused by my

1505
01:14:51,400 --> 01:14:54,519
Speaker 7: dad and the drama he brought with him. So I

1506
01:14:54,600 --> 01:14:59,280
Speaker 7: stopped caring about his opinion and stopped trying any final thoughts.

1507
01:14:59,560 --> 01:15:03,240
Speaker 4: Uh. I think it's interesting that once like, there's all

1508
01:15:03,240 --> 01:15:08,920
Speaker 4: these issues with anxiety, Yeah, and then once this one

1509
01:15:09,200 --> 01:15:12,479
Speaker 4: thing was cut out your father, it sounds like it

1510
01:15:12,560 --> 01:15:17,599
Speaker 4: got a lot better. Yeah, And especially hearing that he's

1511
01:15:17,600 --> 01:15:21,600
Speaker 4: been manipulating and lying to your brother as well, it

1512
01:15:21,680 --> 01:15:23,439
Speaker 4: sounds like he may be the source of.

1513
01:15:23,400 --> 01:15:23,920
Speaker 5: All of this.

1514
01:15:24,280 --> 01:15:24,559
Speaker 7: Yeah.

1515
01:15:24,640 --> 01:15:28,719
Speaker 4: No, absolutely, from the very like from my developmental up.

1516
01:15:28,800 --> 01:15:32,320
Speaker 7: Well, it sounds also like every time that you try

1517
01:15:32,439 --> 01:15:35,680
Speaker 7: to work through this and work on it, he or

1518
01:15:35,680 --> 01:15:39,240
Speaker 7: at least when he's around, has sabotaged that. So even

1519
01:15:39,280 --> 01:15:42,080
Speaker 7: as you try to improve, he works against.

1520
01:15:41,760 --> 01:15:44,000
Speaker 4: Them, he sabotages or doubles down.

1521
01:15:44,320 --> 01:15:44,679
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1522
01:15:44,760 --> 01:15:47,400
Speaker 7: I finally realize that people who value and love me

1523
01:15:47,479 --> 01:15:50,240
Speaker 7: and my kids will treat us with kindness and love

1524
01:15:50,280 --> 01:15:54,000
Speaker 7: and not manipulate and isolate. So since this, I have

1525
01:15:54,080 --> 01:15:57,639
Speaker 7: been less stressed and my anxiety is non existent. And

1526
01:15:57,720 --> 01:16:00,080
Speaker 7: every now and then I'll see my dad post pictures

1527
01:16:00,080 --> 01:16:02,360
Speaker 7: of him with my brother, and my brother will tell

1528
01:16:02,360 --> 01:16:04,679
Speaker 7: me it's to try to bait me and piss me off,

1529
01:16:05,120 --> 01:16:07,200
Speaker 7: but I've reached the point that I just don't care

1530
01:16:07,439 --> 01:16:10,719
Speaker 7: because my kids mean the world to me, and if anything,

1531
01:16:10,760 --> 01:16:12,760
Speaker 7: my bonus dad was more of a father to me

1532
01:16:12,880 --> 01:16:15,960
Speaker 7: than my own baby juice donor. And I'm sad that

1533
01:16:16,000 --> 01:16:18,960
Speaker 7: I lost the one person who truly loved me, and

1534
01:16:19,040 --> 01:16:21,760
Speaker 7: I'm left with a baby juice donor who values their

1535
01:16:21,800 --> 01:16:25,559
Speaker 7: pride over being an actual dad who loves no matter

1536
01:16:25,600 --> 01:16:28,320
Speaker 7: what and support their child even if they are in

1537
01:16:28,360 --> 01:16:31,400
Speaker 7: a crisis. As of now, I did talk to my

1538
01:16:31,439 --> 01:16:33,680
Speaker 7: grandma and found out my dad has been acting like

1539
01:16:33,720 --> 01:16:36,920
Speaker 7: everything was chilled between us. I told my grandma the

1540
01:16:37,040 --> 01:16:41,720
Speaker 7: correct information. She apologized but said he's just stubborn, and

1541
01:16:41,800 --> 01:16:43,599
Speaker 7: I guess she called him out and he gave her

1542
01:16:43,600 --> 01:16:46,759
Speaker 7: some sob story about how he misses me and what's

1543
01:16:46,800 --> 01:16:50,280
Speaker 7: to talk to me, And I told my grandma I'm blocked.

1544
01:16:50,640 --> 01:16:52,960
Speaker 7: So if that's even true, he can reach out, but

1545
01:16:53,080 --> 01:16:56,439
Speaker 7: we all know he won't. So my dad's playing victim

1546
01:16:56,479 --> 01:16:59,400
Speaker 7: while he's being a self absorbed a whole. And that

1547
01:16:59,640 --> 01:17:02,160
Speaker 7: is the end of that story. But yeah,