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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, what a day? What I can't be hype?

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Speaker 2: Now I know why you don't drink coffee. Hey, everybody,

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Speaker 2: this is adults. So that's Jordan, Carlos, Jordan, caffeine free Carlos.

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Speaker 2: This is Michelle. Give me the cappuccino, honey, Buteau.

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Speaker 3: I see you drinking your coffee in some like Parisian cafe,

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Speaker 3: like out front sunglasses with a freaking trench coat. Like

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Speaker 3: that's you in the morning.

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Speaker 2: Can I tell you a teeny tiny secret? Can I

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Speaker 2: tell you a size eight to ten petite secret?

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Speaker 1: Say more?

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Speaker 4: And I should because.

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Speaker 2: My dad is Icn and my mom is half French,

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Speaker 2: my grandfather's from Leon. I should be a big today,

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Speaker 2: Parisian bitch, I'm not Amsterdam.

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Speaker 1: Got me hold on stand by, Buteau.

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Speaker 4: Michelle Antoinette Puteau.

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Speaker 1: Yes, your name is not Antoinette.

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Speaker 2: My mom was born on Bastile Day, and so my

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Speaker 2: grandfather named her Marie Antoinette.

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Speaker 4: And might read the room, but.

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Speaker 2: He named all his kids after kings and queens in France.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, girl, girl, okay.

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Speaker 2: And so my dad is Michelle, my mom's Marie Antoinette,

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Speaker 2: and so I'm Michell Antoinette.

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Speaker 1: Do you have a cousin Charlemagne or no.

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Speaker 2: I do have a Charles Marie and of Frederick Louis.

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Speaker 2: We don't have to talk about it. It is not okay,

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Speaker 2: but here we are. Yeah, you know, it's very Jamaican.

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Speaker 2: So like my mom's name is Marie Antoinette, but they

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Speaker 2: call her.

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Speaker 3: Tea Tinette, t Antoinette and Antinette Antoinette, Mary Antoinette.

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Speaker 1: I love the emphasis.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, sometimes it just goes to to net So.

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Speaker 3: Amsterdam's got you. You're there on the canals having that coffee.

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Speaker 3: That's you, Okay, I feel you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm riding my bike with my full locks, my

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Speaker 2: boyfriend Jean's look at you or my wild fang consciously

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Speaker 2: made Onesie that we have to get your wife one

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Speaker 2: because she likes someone.

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Speaker 4: I'll put you in touch, okay.

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Speaker 2: And my kids can run around and I can zip

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Speaker 2: Zip Chip, a very good coffee with like a little

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Speaker 2: cookie or stroke waffle. You know.

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Speaker 1: The thing about Amsterdam is the light is so nice.

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Speaker 3: And the problem is that, like in the morning we

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Speaker 3: would go out for coffee and I thought I'm missing

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Speaker 3: out on this. I only have like seven days of

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Speaker 3: this this could be my life.

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Speaker 1: I know.

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Speaker 3: I love a good morning light with a nice coffee

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Speaker 3: and all that you've just described, you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, next on my list to do with kids, And

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Speaker 2: I don't know, and you guys feel free to tell

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Speaker 2: me how it goes.

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Speaker 4: Thinking about Cape Town.

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Speaker 1: Wait, you're going to Cape Town to South Africa.

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Speaker 2: I'm thinking about Cape Town for the next place to

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Speaker 2: post up because Okay, Cape Town. I went there for

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Speaker 2: my thirtieth birthday. It was there for about a month.

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Speaker 2: It was so like I just remember it being sort

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Speaker 2: of like New York, sort of like Amsterdam, like special, unique,

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Speaker 2: like a weird, crazy place in the world, like a diamond,

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Speaker 2: like so much pressure, so much sadness, so much grief.

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Speaker 2: But boom, look at this place. It's like thriving, like

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Speaker 2: people thriving. And I think it would be interesting.

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Speaker 4: I could be wrong.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, but I'm thinking about Capetown and I

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Speaker 2: don't know how that gonna go with my Caribbean American

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Speaker 2: heritage and then also my Dutch husband and the Afrikaans

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Speaker 2: of it all.

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Speaker 4: But you know, we here, we got our kids. Let's

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Speaker 4: go see.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, where would y'all go?

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Speaker 4: I know you love Paris.

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Speaker 3: I love Paris. Wife wants to go back to Paris.

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Speaker 3: She's like, haven't had enough Paris any more?

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Speaker 1: Paris? Oh?

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Speaker 4: Wow?

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Speaker 1: Do I have my brothers in this situation? I have

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Speaker 1: my brothers?

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Speaker 3: You're who when people are always like if I had

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Speaker 3: my brothers, this, that and the third, what does that mean?

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Speaker 3: I have no idea, but I'm like you, I think

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Speaker 3: a druther. It's like my choice. If I had the choice,

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Speaker 3: got it?

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Speaker 4: Got it? God, I got it?

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Speaker 3: Yes, So if I had my dreathers, I would probably

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Speaker 3: post up. I know it's lame. I want to say,

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Speaker 3: like Hawaii. I've always wanted to go to not lame. Okay,

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Speaker 3: if I could go for like two tree weeks, two

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Speaker 3: tree weeks to the islands and like go around there,

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Speaker 3: that would make my heart go pit or pat or

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Speaker 3: I think either I loved Brazil. I would go back

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Speaker 3: to Brazil or go to Argentina. Brazil was awesome because

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Speaker 3: it's a chocolate place and you could feel it. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: And it was the first place where I was like, oh,

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Speaker 3: I feel like I'm in the majority here.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: It's the New Orleans of South America. Argentina is really beautiful.

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Speaker 2: I spent a friend's birthday there for a little bit

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Speaker 2: while my dad was living in Venezuelan, and so I

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Speaker 2: was just like in South America a lot. But when

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Speaker 2: is idays, I days am I saying that?

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Speaker 1: Right? I liked it.

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Speaker 4: When is ice, I'll take.

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Speaker 2: It is gorgeous and historical and very white.

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Speaker 1: That's true.

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Speaker 4: But I know you know how to ski, boy, joy,

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Speaker 4: Let's go.

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Speaker 2: And there's this town not too far from Buenos Aires

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Speaker 2: that's called Buddy Loche.

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Speaker 4: Okay, it's a beautiful ski town.

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Speaker 2: And what's so special about it too, is that there's

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Speaker 2: chocolate factories there, so when you walk through the streets,

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Speaker 2: you just smell fresh.

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Speaker 1: Stop.

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Speaker 3: Fucklets stop right now, stop right now. So I'm on

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Speaker 3: skip lagged right now, on skip lag. That's me on

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Speaker 3: skip blagged. Can you hear that? Yeah, that's me on skiplag.

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Speaker 2: It's real, It's really there's so many magical parts of

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Speaker 2: this world that we have yet to explore. And it

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Speaker 2: really is kind of the best education that you can

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Speaker 2: never learn in school. Like I used to say, like

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Speaker 2: if you're single and you want to travel and meet

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Speaker 2: people and you can't do that, just suck a dick

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Speaker 2: with foreskin because it feels like you're another country.

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Speaker 4: It's kind of the same thing.

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Speaker 1: Can I Can I say something now? I was about to.

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Speaker 3: I was about to compliment you on your parallel thinking

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Speaker 3: because sorry, because no, no, no, it's awesome. Like you

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Speaker 3: and Mark Twain come to the same point, but yours

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Speaker 3: is through the dick. And like Mark Twain said that

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Speaker 3: travel is the greatest antidote to ignorance. Interesting, yeah, because

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Speaker 3: once you've experienced it, you can't stay dumb. Okay, And

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Speaker 3: it's like Michelle's same, same energy, and then.

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Speaker 4: I went for the dick show.

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Speaker 2: But but it's the same shit, It's the same thing.

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Speaker 1: Don't you think.

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Speaker 4: I think the world would be a better place.

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Speaker 2: My world would be a better place if everybody, not

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Speaker 2: just most people, but everybody would think, like what life

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Speaker 2: would be like if they didn't look like this, if

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Speaker 2: they look like that person, Just like think outside your

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Speaker 2: five mile radius and how that person feels.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, everybody's always.

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Speaker 2: Caught up with them and their journey and so triggered

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Speaker 2: by like it's always happening to them, But what about

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Speaker 2: those other people? You know?

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Speaker 4: So I don't know that's how I feel.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I mean, listen, we're all trying to get through it,

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Speaker 3: and we're lucky to have people like you who, like

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Speaker 3: you're using your resources, using your wherewithal to not only

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Speaker 3: give yourself but your family something different when they grow up.

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Speaker 3: You know, Like I was watching that Stanley Tucci show.

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Speaker 3: Stanley Tucci spent a year in Italy with his family

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Speaker 3: because his parents got into some kind of program where

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Speaker 3: they could do that. Oh wow, look at the effect

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Speaker 3: that it had on his life.

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Speaker 1: You see what I'm saying.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, forever and all the time.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yes, so it's like live that different kind of life.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: And speaking of living the artist's life and being different

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Speaker 3: our guests today, yeah, can we just talk about that

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Speaker 3: for a moment?

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Speaker 4: We can?

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Speaker 3: Okay, because our guest is I love that we have

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Speaker 3: her on I do too.

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Speaker 2: Can I just say one thing before we start talking

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Speaker 2: about how wonderful full our guests is.

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Speaker 4: That just popped into my mind.

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Speaker 2: Yes, think about the first time that your parents took

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Speaker 2: you somewhere and you still have that memory, for better

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Speaker 2: or for worse, and you more than likely are more

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Speaker 2: open to either going back to that place we're talking

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Speaker 2: about that place, or like going somewhere else because you

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Speaker 2: went that to that place. Yes, you know, I think

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Speaker 2: it's a core memory that will serve you forever and

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Speaker 2: all of the time. And I know, like a lot

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Speaker 2: of people are like, I don't want to bring my dog,

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Speaker 2: I don't remember my kids. Well, I want to bring

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Speaker 2: them when they're old enough. It's just like, this isn't

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Speaker 2: just for them, it's also for you to make core memories.

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Speaker 2: You know, you don't even know what they might remember.

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Speaker 2: So if you just take them and fuck around the sea,

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Speaker 2: because life is going to be hard with them at

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Speaker 2: a target or at Chiple Airport in Amsterdam, you're gonna

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Speaker 2: be lifing with these kids anyways, Like you might as

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Speaker 2: well go and like teach them how to move through the.

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Speaker 4: World that part period.

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Speaker 2: Yes, it's like what you're saying, it's gonna be like

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Speaker 2: a memory that you like don't mind going back to

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Speaker 2: physically or emotionally. So anyways, I just say, you know,

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Speaker 2: you can also find ways around money. I know a

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Speaker 2: lot of people are just like, I don't have the money, honey, please.

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Speaker 2: I opened up a whole ask credit card and went

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Speaker 2: to South Africa. Took me long time paid off, but

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Speaker 2: I'll tell you what. I went to Africa realized the

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Speaker 2: world is much bigger than me. I'm just barely a

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Speaker 2: fucking wrinkle. People have fought just to exist in this place.

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Speaker 2: And so when I came back home, I quit my

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Speaker 2: job and started doing comedy full time. So I'm just like, Wow,

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Speaker 2: too many people here died so I could fucking live

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Speaker 2: my dream. That's like what I came back with and

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Speaker 2: a huge credit card bill.

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Speaker 4: And I started.

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Speaker 2: I started doing stand up full time and paid that

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Speaker 2: shit off. Yeah, it took me a long ass time,

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Speaker 2: but I paid that shit off.

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Speaker 1: For the ancestors. Yeah, yeah, did it.

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Speaker 2: So anyways, getting back to our guests, I'm so sorry

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Speaker 2: I had to say that.

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Speaker 1: That was like, well, to say it, get it out.

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Speaker 1: I love that.

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Speaker 3: I love when you do those I love when you

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Speaker 3: get in hot streaks and when you do emotional parts

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Speaker 3: to make being so happy.

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Speaker 1: And you know that.

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Speaker 3: So let's not play games. Our guest hilarious comedian and more. Yes, actress, writer,

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Speaker 3: podcaster and more. Her latest special, The First Woman, is

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Speaker 3: out on Amazon Prime Video right now.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: You can also catch her on Home Economics as well.

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Speaker 3: You can catch her in a lot of things. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: We're just so lucky to have her. So we caught

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Speaker 3: her by the tail. Let's give it up for the

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Speaker 3: one and only sash.

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Speaker 1: Here's a maid of that's where the airhorns would come.

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Speaker 1: I got it.

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Speaker 4: I hope they got it too.

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Speaker 5: Bitches sshire Hello, Hello, I love your hair.

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Speaker 4: It's cute. This is vacation hair. But there's no vacation.

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Speaker 4: You know what I mean? I mean, bring the vacation

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Speaker 4: to you, stay cation hair. But it's too how long?

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Speaker 4: It's definitely going to end up in a toilet? Yeah,

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Speaker 4: what are we doing?

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Speaker 1: Hi?

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Speaker 4: Friend? Hi friend? How are you?

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Speaker 2: That's a loaded questions, it's a personal you know what

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Speaker 2: is Well? It is good to see you. It's really

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Speaker 2: good to see you. I haven't seen you in forever, forever,

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Speaker 2: too long. Also, you guys can't see but oh, what

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Speaker 2: is that?

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Speaker 1: Is that? What kind of a doll is that?

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Speaker 4: It's a voodoo doll?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 4: My gosh, is mine is in my altar by the door?

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Speaker 5: Oh? We made voodoo dolls in New Orleans and oh

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Speaker 5: I kept them because I think we were just kind

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Speaker 5: of like, that's cute and then just like yeah, left

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Speaker 5: them in the bags that we left the voodoo shop with.

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Speaker 4: And we were told, do not mistreat these voodoo dolls.

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Speaker 5: Thesevoodoo dolls are representations of you, and if you treat

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Speaker 5: them poorly, that's how things are going to be. And

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Speaker 5: so they're sitting in a bag like a corner of

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Speaker 5: my house for months, months, and I remember talking to

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Speaker 5: Michelle being like, I just I don't feel good and she.

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Speaker 4: Was like I don't either. Yeah, and then I was like, wait,

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Speaker 4: let me find those voodoo dolls. And then I like

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Speaker 4: looked online.

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Speaker 5: People were like, yeah, you really had to take care

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Speaker 5: of them or like disassemble them, and there's like a

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Speaker 5: whole ceremony system to get rid of them.

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Speaker 2: And so yeah, the thing is is like we didn't

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Speaker 2: sign up for it, even though we did. Like I

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Speaker 2: did this travel show with I guess it was. I

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Speaker 2: guess it's on Hulu. I don't even remember the name

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Speaker 2: of the show. But I just wanted to hang out

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Speaker 2: with my friends and I love that New Orleans is

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Speaker 2: your town or like one of your towns. And yeah,

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Speaker 2: one of the segments that the producer pitched was going

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Speaker 2: to see Bloody Mary to go make a voodoo doll,

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Speaker 2: and I was like, I guess but I wanted to

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Speaker 2: just like put some respect on it because especially being

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Speaker 2: Haitian American and everyone's just like you know, would always

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Speaker 2: make fun of me, like voodoo is bad and this,

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Speaker 2: that and the third. I'm like, but it also could

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Speaker 2: be magical and fun.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I like that.

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Speaker 5: The way Bloody Mary explained it, it was like, this

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Speaker 5: is for you to enhance what you want in your life,

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Speaker 5: as opposed to this is how you curse someone else who.

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Speaker 4: Did you wrong.

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Speaker 5: It's like, what you want money, put some money in

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Speaker 5: the voodoo doll stomach, you want health, put some water

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Speaker 5: in its mouth, you know, like you do things to

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Speaker 5: the doll that you want for yourself. So it was

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Speaker 5: more like, oh that's cool, uh, moral of a reflection

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Speaker 5: kind of thing.

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Speaker 2: It is cool because you're like saying it and then

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Speaker 2: also doing it out loud in a different way, as

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Speaker 2: opposed to like a to do list in.

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Speaker 4: The morning where you're like overwhelmed. And so.

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Speaker 2: It also is this thing people are like, oh, you

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Speaker 2: got a voodoo doll, you must be into witchcraft or

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Speaker 2: whatever it is. It's like, no, man, It's just also

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Speaker 2: like a nice reminder to treat.

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Speaker 4: Your body like a temple.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we did the whole ass show like we have

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Speaker 2: a voodoo doll, right, but like everyone assumes that it's

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Speaker 2: just like a segment. But wow, New Orleans is one

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Speaker 2: of those places. Yeah it's magic. Yeah, it's got a

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Speaker 2: lot and crazy energy there. I was getting like a

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Speaker 2: thing red, like a thing read with a person just

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Speaker 2: to like know what the thing you're just for fun.

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Speaker 4: It was a birthday gift.

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Speaker 2: And she's like I keep hearing Marie Levo yeah, and

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Speaker 2: I was like yeah, yeah from Michelle Bete.

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Speaker 4: Hello, yes, wow Marie Levo, Mi sheelbyto Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah what is it about No Orleans that just like

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Speaker 1: speaks to you this year?

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Speaker 4: I think the energy it feels different there.

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Speaker 5: And yeah, I've been there, I don't know, maybe six

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Speaker 5: or seven times, and every time like something really cool

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Speaker 5: or magical happens. There's a psychic there named Philip who

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Speaker 5: I see every time i'm there. He feels like my

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Speaker 5: best gay uncle. I'm just like going into check in

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Speaker 5: and he's like, oh, yeah, you got a new car

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Speaker 5: and I'm like, yes I did. Things were noticing and yeah,

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Speaker 5: I don't know. It just feels like a nice refresher

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Speaker 5: to like go back and like get some new energy

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Speaker 5: or some cleansing or healing energy happening, and then go

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Speaker 5: about the rest of my year.

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Speaker 4: I was thinking about it.

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Speaker 2: Why I like New Orleans or why people obviously people

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Speaker 2: are attracked to it because it is a party town.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but if you are black, brown mixed and you

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Speaker 2: go to New Orleans or have any indigenous like anything,

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Speaker 2: there is like a very powerful spirit that is just

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Speaker 2: in the town. Where it comes out is in Hurricane

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Speaker 2: drinks and Bourbon Street. Yeah, and like a celebration of

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Speaker 2: your body and like a second line. But what it

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Speaker 2: truly is, if you like look at it, it's like

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Speaker 2: this pulse of just like we're still here, we're uplifting,

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Speaker 2: we're celebrating. Yeah, that's why I get a headache when

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Speaker 2: I leave, even if I haven't been drinking, because there's

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Speaker 2: so much energy that it feels.

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Speaker 4: Like it takes up a lot. Yeah, everyone's on a

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Speaker 4: high vibration there, and so are the streets.

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Speaker 2: You know, the roaches and the rats, Lord Jesus, there

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Speaker 2: there's a lot of that, Yes, Lord Jesus.

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Speaker 5: I definitely stay in a hotel room where there was

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Speaker 5: a mouse also staying there with me, and probably a

347
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Speaker 5: ghost like there was just like yeah, too many occupants.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, nobody asked, but I asked, like, what what's your town?

349
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Speaker 2: Because we were texting the other day and you're like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'm in Mexico. I'm like queens, Like I didn't even

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Speaker 2: want to call you because I wasn't sure what your

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Speaker 2: coverage was.

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Speaker 5: Oh I know, actually you know when your phone, Stepp

354
00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:20,080
Speaker 5: was working, like a new one's not to come out,

355
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Speaker 5: and now all of a sudden there's all these problems.

356
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Speaker 5: I would go to Mexico and my phone would just

357
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Speaker 5: like be like, we don't know where you are, and

358
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Speaker 5: I'm like, why can't I know I have service here?

359
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Speaker 5: There was one really scary time where I went to

360
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Speaker 5: Tuloom with some friends and landed. I was on my

361
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Speaker 5: flight by myself. My phone did not have service. I

362
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Speaker 5: couldn't figure out how.

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Speaker 4: To call my friends. I couldn't figure out.

364
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Speaker 5: How to use a payphone because it wasn't like a

365
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Speaker 5: payphone that I've seen before. So I was like I

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Speaker 5: don't know how to find anybody, and I was like

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Speaker 5: kind of walking around the airport aimlessly, really upset, and

368
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Speaker 5: then eventually they found me, but I was kind of

369
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Speaker 5: like shell shock, just like, okay, this is I don't

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Speaker 5: like this. And then my phone didn't work for the

371
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Speaker 5: rest of the trip. But I was like, well, my

372
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Speaker 5: friends will help me out.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's kind of scary if you can't find your friends.

374
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Speaker 3: Like if we were the nineties and you couldn't find

375
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Speaker 3: your friends, fine, if it's the now, no, yeah, that's

376
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Speaker 3: no point.

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Speaker 4: That's a good point.

378
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Speaker 5: When I was a kid, I have a phone, but

379
00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:17,000
Speaker 5: I was able to navigate just fine. How how like

380
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Speaker 5: make a collect call, call my mom and be like,

381
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Speaker 5: I'm at this place, come and get me.

382
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Speaker 1: They come get me. Yeah.

383
00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:24,639
Speaker 2: We were all like prisoners, like in Oranges and New Black,

384
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Speaker 2: Like you've received a collect call from I'm.

385
00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:27,719
Speaker 4: At the ball, come get me.

386
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Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, you have a call from I'm by the

387
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:32,520
Speaker 2: Ben and Jerry's.

388
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,480
Speaker 1: Oh my god, y'all remember landmarks?

389
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Speaker 4: Uh, landmarks, landmarks?

390
00:17:38,760 --> 00:17:39,639
Speaker 1: Oh my god.

391
00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:41,800
Speaker 4: What were the directions we had to print out?

392
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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, map quest?

393
00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:45,400
Speaker 4: Yes, map quest? Yeah.

394
00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:47,360
Speaker 2: I think I wrote about it on my blog. That's

395
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:52,480
Speaker 2: how long ago. Yeah, printing directions out it's insane. But

396
00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:55,560
Speaker 2: even like the way we film TV and film right now,

397
00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:58,040
Speaker 2: you know, like this is what a phone would sound

398
00:17:58,080 --> 00:17:59,520
Speaker 2: like or this is how we would hold our phone

399
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Speaker 2: in a scene because it's such a part of our lives.

400
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Speaker 4: It's like ridiculous.

401
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,800
Speaker 2: And I say this to like a lot of parents

402
00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:07,280
Speaker 2: at daycare that don't really want to like talk about it,

403
00:18:07,280 --> 00:18:09,840
Speaker 2: but I'm like, whatever, I'm here, I really want us

404
00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:12,719
Speaker 2: to make sure we help our kids define their worth

405
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:18,240
Speaker 2: without social media because as like a fully realized forty

406
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:20,680
Speaker 2: six year old woman with BACKFEDT I'm still just like.

407
00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:23,640
Speaker 4: This didn't get so many likes, but this one, did

408
00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:24,760
Speaker 4: you know what I mean?

409
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I'm forty six and I know what it's

410
00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:29,800
Speaker 2: like to be loved and I know what it's like

411
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Speaker 2: to live without internet. So I'm just like, damn, Like,

412
00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:35,119
Speaker 2: what are the things that you do for yourself to

413
00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:38,320
Speaker 2: make sure you can define your worth without like.

414
00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:46,120
Speaker 4: Hollywood or exterior validation? Yes? Yes, yes, I try to meditate.

415
00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:49,480
Speaker 5: When I can, and I really like to do list

416
00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:52,919
Speaker 5: and putting everything on a to do list, like I

417
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:56,640
Speaker 5: need a shop for a umbrella for my patio, so

418
00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:58,880
Speaker 5: like but if I do that and I cross it off,

419
00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:01,479
Speaker 5: it feels so good. Yes, being able to cross off

420
00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:03,760
Speaker 5: my to do list, or like making my home my

421
00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:09,000
Speaker 5: sanctuary that feels very good and validating and a little

422
00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:12,400
Speaker 5: more freeing than like posting all the time and being

423
00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:15,359
Speaker 5: like a prisoner to the likes and stuff. I definitely

424
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:17,399
Speaker 5: get wrapped up in it sometimes and I'm like, this

425
00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:20,680
Speaker 5: is annoying. How come my stuff's not like trending or whatever,

426
00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:23,040
Speaker 5: or like why are people saying it? And then like

427
00:19:23,119 --> 00:19:25,000
Speaker 5: I haven't posted anything in last week, and I'm like

428
00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:26,240
Speaker 5: that feels nice.

429
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Speaker 4: I don't care.

430
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,720
Speaker 5: I don't take care of this week, and just like

431
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:33,080
Speaker 5: taking breaks from posting on social media, I still scroll

432
00:19:33,320 --> 00:19:34,760
Speaker 5: a lot, but I can't help it.

433
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Speaker 4: I'm human, I know. Yeah, sometimes I wake up in

434
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:38,840
Speaker 4: the middle of the night and not just grab the

435
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:41,840
Speaker 4: phone because it's so addicting. It really is. They make

436
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:44,359
Speaker 4: it that way. Yeah, how fucking dare they?

437
00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:46,800
Speaker 2: Like I will leave the room and Otis will be like, Mama,

438
00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:49,720
Speaker 2: you forgot your phone. So he thinks that I'm just

439
00:19:49,760 --> 00:19:53,040
Speaker 2: supposed to always have it in my hand. Yeah, isn't

440
00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:55,320
Speaker 2: that crazy? Yeah, but I'm trying to make a rule

441
00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:56,600
Speaker 2: no phone at dinner.

442
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Speaker 1: That's good, that's good.

443
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:02,000
Speaker 3: My kids will do an ession of me on my phone,

444
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:04,040
Speaker 3: and so then I'm like, I'm gonna put it down

445
00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:04,520
Speaker 3: for a while.

446
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:06,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, They're like, this is dad.

447
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:08,760
Speaker 4: Isn't that crazy?

448
00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:13,159
Speaker 3: They be watching? They be watching. Yeah, but I'm like, listen,

449
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,640
Speaker 3: I'm looking things up. I'm trying to help you out.

450
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:16,600
Speaker 4: I know that part.

451
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,399
Speaker 1: It's not all about social media.

452
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,000
Speaker 3: Speaking of looking things up, I want to ask you

453
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:23,680
Speaker 3: this though, Sasha, like, oh my god.

454
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:24,480
Speaker 4: Are you a walk up?

455
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:32,040
Speaker 2: Because we got a segue.

456
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:47,240
Speaker 3: I got to clear something up. Are you like low

457
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:49,560
Speaker 3: key history buff? Because I didn't know how much of

458
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:54,800
Speaker 3: a history buff you are? History buffs blow my hair back?

459
00:20:55,359 --> 00:20:58,679
Speaker 3: Like is that your zodiac sign? Because I feel like

460
00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:02,160
Speaker 3: that is you, Like you're definitely history major. Rising Oh

461
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:02,920
Speaker 3: thank you so much.

462
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:06,480
Speaker 5: I was like, what, I feel like I'm a history

463
00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:11,359
Speaker 5: buff on very specific things that interest me, Like I

464
00:21:11,359 --> 00:21:14,199
Speaker 5: have a fifty minute joke about Amelia Earhart in my

465
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:17,320
Speaker 5: special and it really is just from like pulling the

466
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,080
Speaker 5: thread because I was like, why do we talk about

467
00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:21,879
Speaker 5: a million Earharts so much? She didn't even complete her mission,

468
00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:24,439
Speaker 5: and then it just kind of spun from there of

469
00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:26,800
Speaker 5: like why do we talk about her? How did she

470
00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:29,200
Speaker 5: get so famous? What has she accomplished? Why don't we

471
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:32,320
Speaker 5: talk about these accomplishments. It just like kept spiraling more

472
00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:34,600
Speaker 5: and more and more. And I think that's where the

473
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:39,560
Speaker 5: research part comes from, because I just am genuinely interested in,

474
00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:42,680
Speaker 5: like where this comes from. But if you ask me

475
00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:44,879
Speaker 5: about like certain wars, I probably have no idea what.

476
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:45,679
Speaker 4: You're talking about.

477
00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:49,240
Speaker 5: Okay, right, So it's not like a general knowledge of history,

478
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:50,960
Speaker 5: but about certain specific things.

479
00:21:51,080 --> 00:21:53,720
Speaker 3: Yes, if you haven't heard this, this is on such

480
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:54,240
Speaker 3: your special.

481
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:55,120
Speaker 1: It's so good.

482
00:21:55,119 --> 00:21:58,080
Speaker 3: Her latest special, by the way, on Amazon, That's where

483
00:21:58,119 --> 00:22:01,560
Speaker 3: I watched it, and like it was this amazing fifteen

484
00:22:01,560 --> 00:22:03,600
Speaker 3: minute bit all about Amelia Earhart.

485
00:22:03,760 --> 00:22:06,119
Speaker 1: You dragged her for filth yep, built her back up?

486
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:08,000
Speaker 4: How you do it? How you do it?

487
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:11,440
Speaker 1: You basically yeah, put her out in the compost.

488
00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:15,359
Speaker 3: But like, but what I loved was, like then I

489
00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 3: learned other things, like this person, the first woman to

490
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:22,240
Speaker 3: actually circumnavigate the globe by air was somebody named schmuck

491
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:25,680
Speaker 3: or Jerry muck muck muck, not schmuck sorry, Jerry muck.

492
00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:31,280
Speaker 5: Sorry, I really I thought it some schmuck named Jerry mun.

493
00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:34,440
Speaker 3: I didn't know what her name was. I just was like, schmuck, mock,

494
00:22:34,560 --> 00:22:38,320
Speaker 3: something like that. Jerry muck was the person's name, and

495
00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:42,639
Speaker 3: they are not famous. Yeah, and you pointed out the

496
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:44,639
Speaker 3: world a plenty of time to like discover who this

497
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:45,119
Speaker 3: person was.

498
00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:47,679
Speaker 4: They didn't do it, They didn't do it. Yeah. I

499
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:50,119
Speaker 4: think it really was like she didn't have that like

500
00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:54,520
Speaker 4: it factor and Amelia did. She had the backing.

501
00:22:54,680 --> 00:22:54,920
Speaker 1: Yeah.

502
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:58,800
Speaker 2: By the way, Amelia and I have the same birthday. Whoa, whoa, whoa,

503
00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:02,720
Speaker 2: it's me. I heard j low Rick Fox rose Burn.

504
00:23:04,119 --> 00:23:07,320
Speaker 2: And I have to say all of us bad at directions,

505
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 2: all of us Yes, we'll make it shiny, but we can't.

506
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 2: There's no follow through.

507
00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:15,879
Speaker 4: Yeah. So I do appreciate it.

508
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:17,879
Speaker 2: I quote you all the time, like, now you have

509
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:19,880
Speaker 2: this scrape bit about razors.

510
00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:24,320
Speaker 4: Oh yes, yeah about shaving, Yes, same deal.

511
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:27,399
Speaker 5: I was like kind of in my own personal like

512
00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:32,639
Speaker 5: anti shaving body hair moment, and I was like, why

513
00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:36,080
Speaker 5: why am I even shaving this stuff? Like why where

514
00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:39,119
Speaker 5: did this start? And then I did some digging and

515
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:42,080
Speaker 5: found that razor companies back in the day were only

516
00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:44,720
Speaker 5: marketing to men because men needed to shave their beards

517
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:45,320
Speaker 5: or whatever.

518
00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 4: And then eventually they were like.

519
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,439
Speaker 5: You know, we could be making more money if we

520
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:52,080
Speaker 5: figure out how to sell to women, and then they

521
00:23:52,119 --> 00:23:55,720
Speaker 5: started making up all these crazy advertisements, being like, women,

522
00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:59,439
Speaker 5: you don't want to be stinky or ugly or a

523
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:02,480
Speaker 5: spenceed or die alone. That's what's gonna happen to you

524
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:04,399
Speaker 5: who keep all your body hair. You gotta shave that

525
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:07,000
Speaker 5: shit off. And then women were like, oh my god,

526
00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:09,840
Speaker 5: I have to listen to this, and yeah, started buying

527
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:12,480
Speaker 5: razors like crazy, and then that like jacked up the

528
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:13,280
Speaker 5: whole industry.

529
00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:13,680
Speaker 1: Wow.

530
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:17,280
Speaker 5: But it was like such an unnecessary construct that was

531
00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:21,480
Speaker 5: truly created and we followed suit. But there's no like

532
00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:25,040
Speaker 5: hygienic reason for us to not have body hair, just

533
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:28,960
Speaker 5: just to like make us look like baby seals and

534
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:30,600
Speaker 5: give razors money.

535
00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:34,080
Speaker 3: That's so interesting because now, like I don't know if

536
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 3: it's in LA, but definitely on the subways in New

537
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:38,960
Speaker 3: York City, there's there's this campaign called Free the Pit

538
00:24:39,359 --> 00:24:42,240
Speaker 3: and I think it's by Dove. So they're like, oh,

539
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:45,119
Speaker 3: we taken black to night, We're taken black to night. However,

540
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:46,960
Speaker 3: I mean I'm like, Okay, to what extent do I

541
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,040
Speaker 3: believe this? Because it's all in the service of capitalism,

542
00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:52,000
Speaker 3: So now you can have pit hair. Now it's okay.

543
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:52,760
Speaker 1: To have pit hair.

544
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:53,359
Speaker 4: Yeah?

545
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:55,240
Speaker 1: Are they trend setting? Are they following a trend?

546
00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:58,080
Speaker 3: Like to your credit, what you're talking about is advertising

547
00:24:58,119 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 3: wagging the dog, you know, the tail wagging the or

548
00:25:00,359 --> 00:25:01,040
Speaker 3: what right?

549
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:03,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, which I also talk about in the special too

550
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:08,200
Speaker 5: about femortizing. Yes, like how different companies will use the

551
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:13,720
Speaker 5: feminist trend theme that that people are talking about to

552
00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:18,680
Speaker 5: sell products and they're just like you, you enjoy being girl, right,

553
00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:21,240
Speaker 5: and you want other girls a girl before you girl,

554
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:24,840
Speaker 5: and like just like it's nonsense, yeah, girl power, this

555
00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:27,960
Speaker 5: girl power that which like, of course I love that stuff,

556
00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:31,080
Speaker 5: but it just feels little demeaning when it's framed in

557
00:25:31,080 --> 00:25:32,080
Speaker 5: a way of like and.

558
00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:33,880
Speaker 4: Now you have to buy this thing content.

559
00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:36,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's always like you never noticed like super Bowl

560
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:39,119
Speaker 3: ads or like that, like as you're like, ooh, what

561
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 3: a cinematic moment. Oh this is great. Oh uh, baloney,

562
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:44,240
Speaker 3: that's what we're selling.

563
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:48,639
Speaker 2: Like there's so many like peripheral circles to that sadness

564
00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:50,840
Speaker 2: for me though, because I'm just like it's great to

565
00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:54,480
Speaker 2: talk to y'all about it, like like minded friends, but

566
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:57,960
Speaker 2: to have like co workers and friends that I've known

567
00:25:57,960 --> 00:25:59,000
Speaker 2: for a long time.

568
00:25:58,760 --> 00:25:59,760
Speaker 4: That subscribe to this.

569
00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:03,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just like a special type of mind fuckery

570
00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:06,160
Speaker 2: that I don't always know how to get around because

571
00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:08,680
Speaker 2: I love them, I miss them. They're my cousins, They're

572
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:10,959
Speaker 2: like actual family members or like friends that I've known

573
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:13,200
Speaker 2: since I was like eight. But then they like sort

574
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:16,200
Speaker 2: of you know, copy and paste is language that they've

575
00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:16,880
Speaker 2: been served.

576
00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I'm like, or what do you think?

577
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:23,840
Speaker 2: Well, I think what Facebook told me, But what do

578
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 2: you think?

579
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:28,800
Speaker 4: Well, actually this TikTok, And I'm like, well, what your

580
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 4: a bellion?

581
00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:33,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's so many layers you really have to fucking

582
00:26:33,680 --> 00:26:36,639
Speaker 2: fight on a daily Like, it's not just like advertising.

583
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:38,680
Speaker 2: It's like baked in our DNA, how we're supposed to

584
00:26:38,720 --> 00:26:41,639
Speaker 2: feel about ourselves. Yeah, and so I don't know. This

585
00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:44,199
Speaker 2: is for whoever's listening. If your friend is telling you

586
00:26:44,280 --> 00:26:46,359
Speaker 2: that they're having a hard time, or they're going to therapy,

587
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,840
Speaker 2: or they're blah blah blah blah blah, don't judge them.

588
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:49,679
Speaker 4: Just be like, good for you.

589
00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:52,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, if they're getting a prisonlian butt lift, don't judge

590
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:53,960
Speaker 2: them unless it's a bad one.

591
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:56,199
Speaker 4: Just say good for you. Like they're doing whatever they

592
00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:58,720
Speaker 4: gotta do to feel fucking good. Yeah.

593
00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:00,800
Speaker 5: I think that's all we can do right now because

594
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:05,199
Speaker 5: life's too short and we just need like ways to

595
00:27:05,280 --> 00:27:10,440
Speaker 5: feel good. The Earth's gonna end in twelve years, like may.

596
00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:11,600
Speaker 4: As well we got all the last crops.

597
00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:15,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think the Earth's not gonna I think humanity.

598
00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 5: Is humanity exactly. The Earth will be fine. We won't

599
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:18,400
Speaker 5: be here for it.

600
00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:21,399
Speaker 1: Earth is fine. The Earth is like bring it.

601
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:25,600
Speaker 3: We lived through the dinosaurs, the fucking that giant asteroid.

602
00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:26,280
Speaker 1: We'll be fine.

603
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:26,640
Speaker 4: Yeah.

604
00:27:26,720 --> 00:27:28,280
Speaker 1: Can I ask you? Okay?

605
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:30,760
Speaker 3: I felt like I got so much closer to you,

606
00:27:30,840 --> 00:27:33,560
Speaker 3: like on this special. It was like really great, so share,

607
00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:36,119
Speaker 3: Oh thank you. And I knew about your arm and

608
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:38,720
Speaker 3: everything like that and the car accident, but you went

609
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:41,800
Speaker 3: into detail yeah that I had never really heard before.

610
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:43,560
Speaker 3: And I was like, oh man, because you told me,

611
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:45,159
Speaker 3: like you give me the elevator version of it.

612
00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:46,800
Speaker 1: You're like, I got hit. I was in college.

613
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:48,520
Speaker 3: It was it was crazy and I was like, yeah,

614
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:51,520
Speaker 3: oh okay, cool. We got to go on in five seconds,

615
00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:52,960
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying. We were like blackstage at

616
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:55,320
Speaker 3: a show. Yeah, So, like, how did that feel like

617
00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:58,040
Speaker 3: telling the world about all that?

618
00:27:58,200 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 4: It felt good?

619
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:00,320
Speaker 3: Great.

620
00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:03,760
Speaker 5: I've known that I wanted to say something about getting

621
00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:07,840
Speaker 5: hit by a car for years, But then I think

622
00:28:08,359 --> 00:28:12,200
Speaker 5: the more medical experiences I had in my life and

623
00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:16,720
Speaker 5: seeing how I have gotten treated and how my black

624
00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:20,159
Speaker 5: female friends have gotten treated and my black female relatives

625
00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:22,960
Speaker 5: have gotten treated, it kind of actually made sense to

626
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:25,639
Speaker 5: put it and that lens because the car accident was

627
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:29,320
Speaker 5: a huge thing that rocked my world, but also the

628
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:32,320
Speaker 5: way I was treated at the hospital was also huge,

629
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:35,399
Speaker 5: and like having people not believe the pain that I

630
00:28:35,440 --> 00:28:37,440
Speaker 5: was talking about and not wanting to give me painkillers

631
00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 5: and making me stand on my leg when I got hit,

632
00:28:39,640 --> 00:28:43,120
Speaker 5: and like and making me wait for like seven hours

633
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:45,240
Speaker 5: before they're like, oh, actually, we should have just given

634
00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:47,720
Speaker 5: you painkillers when you ask for them, Like, oh God,

635
00:28:48,280 --> 00:28:52,880
Speaker 5: just this dizzy dance that continues to happen because medical

636
00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:59,160
Speaker 5: professionals aren't trained to assess everybody, or they just have

637
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:03,000
Speaker 5: biases because they're human and we forget that, Like they

638
00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:05,480
Speaker 5: also are a human that might have whatever stereotypes in

639
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:07,520
Speaker 5: their mind about the person that's in front of them,

640
00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:09,840
Speaker 5: and I might treat them a little different.

641
00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:12,640
Speaker 3: Right yeah, Or it could be somewhere in between the

642
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:15,719
Speaker 3: story that you told about, just like standing MRI and

643
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:17,280
Speaker 3: then the guy is like, oh, maybe you should be

644
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:20,520
Speaker 3: sitting there. What yeah, I mean like blast out this hospital.

645
00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:22,400
Speaker 3: So I never go there, she.

646
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:25,760
Speaker 4: Shout, I don't want to blast them out.

647
00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:29,960
Speaker 3: But it's okay, like you know it's it's sisters of

648
00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:31,160
Speaker 3: the Worthless Miracle Hospital.

649
00:29:31,240 --> 00:29:32,080
Speaker 1: Do not go there.

650
00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:39,920
Speaker 4: Her name was nurse Jackie. Let's move on thee like,

651
00:29:39,960 --> 00:29:42,120
Speaker 4: well you should have known better than I have a

652
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:46,200
Speaker 4: weird question, what won't you do for money?

653
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 5: I don't think I'll fuck for money? Really, I don't

654
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:52,280
Speaker 5: think so, I say really like as if I would, yeah,

655
00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:52,760
Speaker 5: would you?

656
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:56,480
Speaker 3: I won't do it again. I won't do it again,

657
00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:58,720
Speaker 3: and I won't do it for that little amount of money.

658
00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:03,280
Speaker 3: And I'll def be paid in American currency because let

659
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:05,200
Speaker 3: me tell you something, exchange rates they bite.

660
00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:08,360
Speaker 4: What in the Liam, Nathan, I have to handle it now?

661
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:08,920
Speaker 4: Is going on?

662
00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:11,000
Speaker 3: I have a very particular set of skills I.

663
00:30:12,760 --> 00:30:13,200
Speaker 4: Have heard.

664
00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:15,680
Speaker 5: But I guess maybe that's not fair because like I've

665
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:20,959
Speaker 5: definitely fucked for food yeah and booze, Yeah, why wouldn't

666
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:22,960
Speaker 5: I up the anty a little bit? But I think

667
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 5: if it's like that's the arrangement ahead of time, I

668
00:30:26,360 --> 00:30:27,600
Speaker 5: don't know if I feel comfortable with that.

669
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:30,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, Oh my god, what was the movie with Demi

670
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:34,719
Speaker 2: Moore and Robert Redford and oh uh, in decent proposal,

671
00:30:35,160 --> 00:30:38,520
Speaker 2: In decent proposal, day was broke and did it for money?

672
00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:41,360
Speaker 1: Yes? It was a million dollars for one night?

673
00:30:41,480 --> 00:30:43,680
Speaker 4: Right, it was no taxes?

674
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:48,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, Robert Redford, Oh my gosh, Woody Harrelson, Woody Haroilson. Yeah,

675
00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 3: oh yeah, they're on the bed with all the money.

676
00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 5: I mean, if I had one of those situations, I

677
00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:55,520
Speaker 5: think I would.

678
00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:57,680
Speaker 4: I think I would do it. Yes, now we're figuring. Now,

679
00:30:57,680 --> 00:30:59,440
Speaker 4: we're figuring it out. Now we're whittling it down.

680
00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:02,880
Speaker 2: We're we're in the weeds. We're in the weeds. I mean,

681
00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:07,600
Speaker 2: this is so stupid. Yeah, stripping sex, blackface?

682
00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:10,240
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I don't think I would do a blackface.

683
00:31:10,560 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 5: I wouldn't know. That would not feel good, No, would.

684
00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:14,840
Speaker 1: Not Oh my god, blackface.

685
00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,760
Speaker 3: No way harder than that would be like doing somebody

686
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:18,600
Speaker 3: else's taxes.

687
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:21,720
Speaker 4: Oh my god, don't do that? What fuck you up? Yeah,

688
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:23,560
Speaker 4: I'm like, you don't want me to.

689
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's a bad deal on yours.

690
00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:30,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, irs at your door right now?

691
00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:32,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, taxes, it feels like a panic room with no clue.

692
00:31:32,960 --> 00:31:33,720
Speaker 4: I'm like, what the.

693
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:34,240
Speaker 1: Fuck is this?

694
00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:38,000
Speaker 3: No, but you get to decide now. I always feel

695
00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:42,840
Speaker 3: like you're like, definitely decisive, but patient with yourself. And

696
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:45,640
Speaker 3: if I'm wrong about this and you're just a roiling

697
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:48,360
Speaker 3: sea within, let me know. But I always feel like you,

698
00:31:49,080 --> 00:31:52,360
Speaker 3: like you know what you want to do and then

699
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:54,400
Speaker 3: you go after it and you get it done. I

700
00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:59,280
Speaker 3: feel you have a certain equanimity ooh spelling, and comfort

701
00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:02,640
Speaker 3: with yourself in a sentence and where you're going.

702
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:05,000
Speaker 1: Am I wrong to what extent? Am I wrong to

703
00:32:05,080 --> 00:32:05,760
Speaker 1: extend my right?

704
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:06,240
Speaker 3: No?

705
00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:08,840
Speaker 4: That's uh. I like that assessment a lot.

706
00:32:08,920 --> 00:32:11,760
Speaker 5: And yeah, I think I am patient and I do

707
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:16,560
Speaker 5: have goals and try to build to those goals. Of course,

708
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:18,520
Speaker 5: there's moments where I'm impatient and I'm like why am

709
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:20,840
Speaker 5: I not the most famous person right now? Or like

710
00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:22,880
Speaker 5: why am I not doing X, Y and Z because

711
00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:24,080
Speaker 5: of Da da Da da dad. But then I think

712
00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:26,160
Speaker 5: about it and I'm like, well, actually I don't want

713
00:32:26,200 --> 00:32:29,360
Speaker 5: to do that that way, or you know, I feel

714
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:31,120
Speaker 5: like things are happening the way they're supposed to happen.

715
00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:35,680
Speaker 5: So yeah, Actually, I've had a friend in college. Actually,

716
00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:39,440
Speaker 5: she was like, I feel like you would like work

717
00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:42,000
Speaker 5: years on something if you knew it would be the

718
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:42,960
Speaker 5: outcome that you wanted.

719
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:43,720
Speaker 4: Like she's like, you're not.

720
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:48,280
Speaker 5: Like a quick like like you want satisfaction immediately. You

721
00:32:48,280 --> 00:32:50,760
Speaker 5: would wait years for something if you knew that it

722
00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:52,440
Speaker 5: was going to turn out how you planned it, which

723
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:52,880
Speaker 5: is true.

724
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:55,840
Speaker 4: I think that is my mode, and so far it's

725
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:57,160
Speaker 4: not working. I love that.

726
00:32:57,600 --> 00:32:59,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, this year for me really has been about patient

727
00:33:00,160 --> 00:33:03,920
Speaker 2: and grace. Yeah, but not necessarily like career stuff, just

728
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:08,080
Speaker 2: like just everyday life, because life is going to be lifing,

729
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:10,440
Speaker 2: Like the traffic is going to be traffic. Yeah, there's

730
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,479
Speaker 2: always something that's going to need to be washed or

731
00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:16,960
Speaker 2: folded or done. And I do love a list too,

732
00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:19,200
Speaker 2: but sometimes I do feel like I'm setting myself up

733
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:20,360
Speaker 2: for failure with these lists.

734
00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:22,640
Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm not getting it done.

735
00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:25,640
Speaker 2: But when I do get some of it done, ooh baby,

736
00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:26,400
Speaker 2: baby baby.

737
00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 4: It's a wild world. Yeah.

738
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:31,320
Speaker 2: So we get some question You've done this show so

739
00:33:31,320 --> 00:33:32,720
Speaker 2: many times and thank you so much, So we do

740
00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:35,800
Speaker 2: get questions from the audience. Still why I don't know,

741
00:33:36,920 --> 00:33:39,440
Speaker 2: and so we're gonna try and answer some. I have

742
00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:43,240
Speaker 2: one it's really cute. I think it is. Giving Today's

743
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:45,960
Speaker 2: show makeover. Someone asks, how do I get my fiance

744
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:48,400
Speaker 2: to dress like the thirty one year old man he is?

745
00:33:49,080 --> 00:33:51,600
Speaker 2: He still wears clothes that he wore in high school.

746
00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:54,000
Speaker 2: The only clothing he owns that's been purchased in the

747
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:57,040
Speaker 2: last decade are items I bought for him. I love

748
00:33:57,120 --> 00:33:59,040
Speaker 2: him dearly, but this is such an ick for me.

749
00:34:00,240 --> 00:34:03,959
Speaker 4: I get it. I get it, bitch. I mean I would.

750
00:34:04,080 --> 00:34:06,720
Speaker 5: I would buy my ex clothes and be like, you

751
00:34:06,760 --> 00:34:10,080
Speaker 5: wear this, and then eventually he started figuring out his

752
00:34:10,080 --> 00:34:12,200
Speaker 5: own style and would buy his own stuff.

753
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:12,720
Speaker 1: Yeah.

754
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:17,319
Speaker 4: I don't know how long that took, but while I

755
00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:18,200
Speaker 4: think it took a while.

756
00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:20,799
Speaker 5: So yeah, it might not be an immediate thing for

757
00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:24,399
Speaker 5: your thirty one year old fiance to like immediately be like, yes,

758
00:34:24,640 --> 00:34:27,560
Speaker 5: my taste this, especially because I feel like it's unfortunate

759
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:31,200
Speaker 5: that straight men aren't encouraged to have style. Yeah, when

760
00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:33,880
Speaker 5: they do, it's like, oh thank god, it's poppin', But

761
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:36,839
Speaker 5: I don't think they're brought up to think that they

762
00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:40,840
Speaker 5: should take pride in how they look. They're like, yeah,

763
00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:42,440
Speaker 5: I had this T shirt since I was in high

764
00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:43,200
Speaker 5: school and.

765
00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:45,680
Speaker 4: I loved it. Yeah, it's my lucky T shirt.

766
00:34:45,680 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 5: I'll keep it forever and don't think about like or

767
00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:50,799
Speaker 5: you could get one that fits you today and that

768
00:34:50,840 --> 00:34:53,000
Speaker 5: would look really nice and maybe he'll bring you other

769
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:53,600
Speaker 5: kinds of luck.

770
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:56,360
Speaker 4: You can find a different lucky T shirt. Yeah.

771
00:34:56,440 --> 00:34:56,720
Speaker 1: Yeah.

772
00:34:56,760 --> 00:34:59,080
Speaker 3: I think the pendulum swings though as far as like

773
00:35:00,239 --> 00:35:03,440
Speaker 3: sis men and style, because at the beginning of the

774
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:06,120
Speaker 3: twentieth century, if you think about like the dapper Dans

775
00:35:06,160 --> 00:35:08,680
Speaker 3: of the world or just like Gentlemen's Quarterly, it was

776
00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:12,960
Speaker 3: all about like dressing correctly haberdash, Yeah, you know, going

777
00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:15,719
Speaker 3: to savile row, having the right tailor and things like that.

778
00:35:15,840 --> 00:35:16,960
Speaker 1: But then somewhere.

779
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:18,000
Speaker 3: Along the line, I mean, if you look at old

780
00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:22,759
Speaker 3: paintings from like the seventeenth eighteenth century, wigs got the

781
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 3: fucking the King's.

782
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:24,399
Speaker 4: Is this true?

783
00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:28,359
Speaker 3: Heels the hails the King? Yeah, something changed. I don't

784
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:28,960
Speaker 3: know what it was.

785
00:35:29,239 --> 00:35:30,919
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was white supremacy.

786
00:35:31,040 --> 00:35:34,080
Speaker 1: It's white supremacy, yes, the grunge era.

787
00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:38,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, But I hope that people understand that, like it's

788
00:35:38,160 --> 00:35:40,640
Speaker 3: not set in stone, Like my father is a style

789
00:35:40,719 --> 00:35:45,839
Speaker 3: maven and confident about it, which made me interested in style. Yea,

790
00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:48,080
Speaker 3: and I would like dress up for permitsas but like

791
00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:52,360
Speaker 3: you can express yourself in this way and still be okay.

792
00:35:52,560 --> 00:35:54,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, I only say that.

793
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:57,200
Speaker 3: My worry is that sometimes when we get a question

794
00:35:57,320 --> 00:36:00,440
Speaker 3: like this, it feels like if just this would change

795
00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:03,759
Speaker 3: about this person, then things would be great in my relationship,

796
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:04,359
Speaker 3: you know what I mean?

797
00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:07,719
Speaker 1: And like, I'm not quite sure if that's you know

798
00:36:07,960 --> 00:36:10,280
Speaker 1: I worry about. I worry about that kind of dynamic.

799
00:36:10,440 --> 00:36:11,960
Speaker 2: I see what you're saying, because the way you do

800
00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:15,000
Speaker 2: one thing is the way you do everything right. Also,

801
00:36:15,680 --> 00:36:19,160
Speaker 2: you know, you could have a very thoughtful hoarder on

802
00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:22,239
Speaker 2: your hands who like it is what it is, They

803
00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:25,319
Speaker 2: like what they like, you know. Yeah, or you have

804
00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:29,120
Speaker 2: a thoughtful person who whose brain works in a different

805
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:31,319
Speaker 2: way and it's not leaning towards the right. His brain

806
00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 2: not his political views, and he doesn't really see clothes

807
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,560
Speaker 2: or fashion as something is important because he's too busy

808
00:36:38,600 --> 00:36:42,640
Speaker 2: being smart at like math or some shit or engineering.

809
00:36:42,840 --> 00:36:44,400
Speaker 4: But like it really is how.

810
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:47,040
Speaker 2: He treats you, because I feel like buy I'm closing, Like,

811
00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:47,759
Speaker 2: just buy him close.

812
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:48,120
Speaker 1: You know.

813
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:50,680
Speaker 2: It's very rare to find two people that are good

814
00:36:50,719 --> 00:36:53,480
Speaker 2: at decorating. Yeah, usually it's the one person and then

815
00:36:53,520 --> 00:36:55,920
Speaker 2: you just like run options by the other person. You know,

816
00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:58,400
Speaker 2: if they're comfortable with this color whatever, So you know,

817
00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:00,640
Speaker 2: if you have the flair for fashion, you do it.

818
00:37:00,680 --> 00:37:01,960
Speaker 2: I don't know if he's gonna as long as he

819
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:03,400
Speaker 2: wipes his ass properly and puts.

820
00:37:05,200 --> 00:37:07,280
Speaker 5: It sounds like at least he's wearing the stuff you're buying,

821
00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:09,799
Speaker 5: So like that's yeah as alngo as not.

822
00:37:09,760 --> 00:37:10,600
Speaker 4: Like a fight.

823
00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:13,440
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, And he kind of had to figure out

824
00:37:13,560 --> 00:37:17,920
Speaker 5: what's underneath the ask because if it's not just I

825
00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:21,880
Speaker 5: don't like the way he dresses, but said, it's the ick, Yeah, there's.

826
00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:22,520
Speaker 4: Something else there.

827
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 5: And like for me, when I first met my ex

828
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:27,800
Speaker 5: and I was like, you're wearing clothes from college?

829
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:28,400
Speaker 4: Was happening?

830
00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:33,280
Speaker 5: Eventually I realized, Oh, I'm witnessing a lack of self

831
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:35,880
Speaker 5: care and I don't like that. Yes, Like, oh, this

832
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:39,480
Speaker 5: person doesn't like believe in themselves enough to like take

833
00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:41,480
Speaker 5: pride in how they look or like there's a lack

834
00:37:41,520 --> 00:37:43,960
Speaker 5: of confidence that isn't attractive.

835
00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:46,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then eventually.

836
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:48,319
Speaker 5: It did shift and then he started like taking pride

837
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:50,640
Speaker 5: in how he looked and like and like buying his

838
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:53,399
Speaker 5: own clothes and that was very attractive, and I was like, oh,

839
00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:56,120
Speaker 5: thank god. Yeah, but yeah, I think, maybe figure out

840
00:37:56,160 --> 00:37:58,440
Speaker 5: what is under this other than the clothes.

841
00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 2: But also, if you are a young man, yeah, essentially

842
00:38:02,239 --> 00:38:05,319
Speaker 2: a young boy, a young man, right, and you meet

843
00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:08,000
Speaker 2: a grown ass woman, then you have to rise to

844
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:12,560
Speaker 2: the occasion absolutely, period, And that's what's happening here.

845
00:38:12,840 --> 00:38:13,120
Speaker 4: Yeah.

846
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:14,880
Speaker 2: I mean I remember doing the row with Eric Andre

847
00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:17,520
Speaker 2: and he would like wear the same red champion sweatshirt

848
00:38:17,560 --> 00:38:21,320
Speaker 2: he wore in college when we were performing at colleges.

849
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:22,840
Speaker 2: And I remember I took that boy tot H and

850
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:25,000
Speaker 2: M and he was like, oh shit, I didn't even

851
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:27,279
Speaker 2: know I could afford nice things, you know what I mean?

852
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, some people even know.

853
00:38:29,239 --> 00:38:33,239
Speaker 2: It's Sir Julia Roberts moment. Big mistake, huge, All right, Jordan,

854
00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 2: what's the next question?

855
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:37,160
Speaker 3: The next question is Hi, Michelle and Jordan. I made

856
00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 3: a fake email editors to send you this because I

857
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:42,960
Speaker 3: am embarrassed. I'm a twenty six year old woman. I'm

858
00:38:42,960 --> 00:38:44,960
Speaker 3: a twenty six year old wman who's never had sex.

859
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:45,560
Speaker 4: Oh.

860
00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:47,080
Speaker 1: I was not ready in high school.

861
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 3: I was really focused on studying in college, and now

862
00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:52,200
Speaker 3: I feel like I have missed the boat. I don't

863
00:38:52,239 --> 00:38:54,480
Speaker 3: really date because I don't know how to tell people. Hi,

864
00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:57,560
Speaker 3: I'm twenty six and inexperienced in every way. I find

865
00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:00,960
Speaker 3: it really embarrassing, but ultimately we love a partner. I

866
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:03,120
Speaker 3: know I'd like to have sex. I enjoy it on

867
00:39:03,120 --> 00:39:03,480
Speaker 3: my own.

868
00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:05,120
Speaker 1: What should I do?

869
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:10,440
Speaker 5: So year would say you, I was a virgin till

870
00:39:11,040 --> 00:39:13,719
Speaker 5: my twenties. I lost it when I was twenty three,

871
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:17,720
Speaker 5: and I feel like you just got to be honest.

872
00:39:17,760 --> 00:39:20,759
Speaker 5: I think if you feel weird and embarrassed about it,

873
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:23,319
Speaker 5: people might also feel weird about it. But if you're like,

874
00:39:23,440 --> 00:39:25,840
Speaker 5: this is the deal I am dating, I would like

875
00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:27,800
Speaker 5: to find somebody. I don't know if you're looking for

876
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:29,799
Speaker 5: a partner or if you're looking for just someone to

877
00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:30,680
Speaker 5: get it done with.

878
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:31,200
Speaker 4: I don't know.

879
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:35,200
Speaker 5: But but whoever you're going to sleep with should be

880
00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:38,200
Speaker 5: well aware of what is happening, and then you can

881
00:39:38,239 --> 00:39:42,480
Speaker 5: talk about it and be like, look, this is intimidating

882
00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:47,319
Speaker 5: and that's okay. Really, the sexiest thing about sex is communication.

883
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:51,160
Speaker 5: So whether you've had sex or not, if you're communicating

884
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:53,080
Speaker 5: what you want and what you need and what you

885
00:39:53,120 --> 00:39:55,759
Speaker 5: don't want and what scares you and what excites you,

886
00:39:56,320 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 5: I think the other person will be very down for

887
00:39:58,680 --> 00:40:02,680
Speaker 5: whatever is going on on, so be honest and don't

888
00:40:02,680 --> 00:40:05,040
Speaker 5: be shy about it. I think it's okay to be like,

889
00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:07,719
Speaker 5: this is my deal. Either you're in or you're out,

890
00:40:07,760 --> 00:40:09,879
Speaker 5: and then then you can go from there.

891
00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:13,680
Speaker 2: You know what, too, it's the longer you wait, the

892
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:16,840
Speaker 2: more you're going to put on it. So I would say,

893
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:21,799
Speaker 2: find at least two people and schedule them, like have

894
00:40:21,880 --> 00:40:24,359
Speaker 2: sex with one one month and then the other way,

895
00:40:24,719 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 2: so that way you're not putting all your eggs in

896
00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:29,919
Speaker 2: a basket. Because for me, if someone told me they're

897
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:31,880
Speaker 2: a virgin and it's the first time we're really going

898
00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:34,440
Speaker 2: to get down, I'd be like, holy shit, what in

899
00:40:34,440 --> 00:40:36,680
Speaker 2: the stage five clinger is going to go on? She

900
00:40:36,920 --> 00:40:38,279
Speaker 2: is going to think we have to get married now.

901
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:40,640
Speaker 2: If you just want to get it over with, then

902
00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:43,040
Speaker 2: you set it up like I just want to get

903
00:40:43,160 --> 00:40:46,879
Speaker 2: not only my feet wet, lol, in this situation, let's go.

904
00:40:47,840 --> 00:40:51,600
Speaker 2: Then I think somebody would probably be more willing to

905
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:52,759
Speaker 2: get down.

906
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:54,400
Speaker 4: Go down lol, everyone.

907
00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:57,640
Speaker 2: And yeah, I mean would you even be down for

908
00:40:57,680 --> 00:41:00,200
Speaker 2: a threesome because that way the pressure is all the

909
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:01,080
Speaker 2: way off.

910
00:41:00,880 --> 00:41:03,000
Speaker 4: Of you and you can just be the queen.

911
00:41:04,120 --> 00:41:06,520
Speaker 2: Wow, you can go you can go to a website

912
00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:09,680
Speaker 2: for that, honey and be super hopefully safe and careful.

913
00:41:09,800 --> 00:41:10,000
Speaker 1: Yeah.

914
00:41:10,239 --> 00:41:12,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, Field is the name of that app. Yeah, that's

915
00:41:12,760 --> 00:41:15,440
Speaker 3: what I keep hearing. What's that field f e e

916
00:41:15,760 --> 00:41:16,440
Speaker 3: ld Field.

917
00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:17,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, you could be a unicorn.

918
00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:23,400
Speaker 5: There are adult summer camps you do like water sports

919
00:41:23,480 --> 00:41:27,640
Speaker 5: and whatever, but there's camp situations for adults. It could

920
00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:30,040
Speaker 5: be fun to like just go to a camp and

921
00:41:30,080 --> 00:41:32,520
Speaker 5: meet a bunch of strangers who are from other parts

922
00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:35,080
Speaker 5: of the country and be like, hey, I'm never going

923
00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:35,840
Speaker 5: to see you again.

924
00:41:36,239 --> 00:41:38,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, go skinny dipping.

925
00:41:38,560 --> 00:41:41,160
Speaker 5: Yeah, and maybe like you're there for a few weeks

926
00:41:41,160 --> 00:41:42,320
Speaker 5: and then who knows.

927
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:44,240
Speaker 4: That's where a lot of people lose their virginity.

928
00:41:44,520 --> 00:41:52,799
Speaker 1: I love it celebrating bodies, Yeah do it. Yeah, I don't.

929
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:55,560
Speaker 2: And I do agree with Susy're like, don't not tell

930
00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:59,359
Speaker 2: somebody tell them because sometimes sex can get a little rough,

931
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:01,680
Speaker 2: and you want to be sure that somebody knows that's

932
00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:04,120
Speaker 2: your first time, you know, and not just like do

933
00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:05,600
Speaker 2: things that you're not comfortable with.

934
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:05,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

935
00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:10,200
Speaker 2: Sex is very different with each person, so you want

936
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 2: a gentle experience all and so you don't Okay, next question.

937
00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:17,799
Speaker 2: Last question. My husband and I recently got engaged. I

938
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:18,839
Speaker 2: am thrilled to.

939
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:19,440
Speaker 4: Be getting married.

940
00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:21,640
Speaker 2: I love him a lot and we have a beautiful relationship. However,

941
00:42:22,120 --> 00:42:24,640
Speaker 2: I'm a bisexual female and I have only ever been

942
00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:26,400
Speaker 2: with two women in my life. Well, I love my

943
00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:28,319
Speaker 2: husband to be I am bummed by the idea that

944
00:42:28,360 --> 00:42:30,239
Speaker 2: I won't ever get to experience because at the side

945
00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:32,640
Speaker 2: of myself, Am I gonna start to cry? He and

946
00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:35,480
Speaker 2: I never discussed being open. Part of me wants to

947
00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:37,919
Speaker 2: bring it up, and I am nervous I will hurt

948
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:41,680
Speaker 2: his feelings. Is it worth to bring up? Or should

949
00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:44,080
Speaker 2: I just get over it? Are women really that great?

950
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:44,800
Speaker 4: Bitch?

951
00:42:45,719 --> 00:42:48,279
Speaker 2: This breaks my heart because you're talking about a life

952
00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:52,759
Speaker 2: partner and you ultimately have to be you. You have

953
00:42:52,880 --> 00:42:56,160
Speaker 2: to strive for the best version of you and what

954
00:42:56,200 --> 00:42:59,239
Speaker 2: you want to do and why or how did you

955
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:01,239
Speaker 2: fall in love with someone that you can't be honest with.

956
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:02,600
Speaker 4: Yeah?

957
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 5: I get what she's saying, though, because it is scary

958
00:43:04,680 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 5: because you don't want your partner to think am I

959
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:07,520
Speaker 5: not good enough?

960
00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:07,640
Speaker 3: Like?

961
00:43:07,680 --> 00:43:12,040
Speaker 5: Am I not enough for my partner? Which that's not it,

962
00:43:12,280 --> 00:43:15,719
Speaker 5: that's not She's just saying she wants to experience her

963
00:43:15,880 --> 00:43:16,800
Speaker 5: full self.

964
00:43:17,080 --> 00:43:18,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, and if your.

965
00:43:18,120 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 5: Partner loves you, they should also want to experience your

966
00:43:20,760 --> 00:43:22,719
Speaker 5: full self. I think there's a way you can talk

967
00:43:22,760 --> 00:43:25,719
Speaker 5: to your partner and let them know it has nothing

968
00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:28,040
Speaker 5: to do with them. It's not that like their dick

969
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:36,760
Speaker 5: is trash or anything like that. It's just that you.

970
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:36,480
Speaker 1: Also your dick is trash from the makers of Everything's

971
00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 1: Trash and dick after dark. Yeah. Yo, So I think

972
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:44,640
Speaker 1: that's wild.

973
00:43:44,719 --> 00:43:46,759
Speaker 3: I mean, first of all, it sounds like someone that's

974
00:43:46,840 --> 00:43:49,000
Speaker 3: just like a pleaser, a bit of a pleaser, right,

975
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:52,839
Speaker 3: and like they don't want to rock the boat, but

976
00:43:53,280 --> 00:43:53,560
Speaker 3: you know.

977
00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:55,080
Speaker 4: I'll get you know what if you can't do it.

978
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:56,279
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry to cut you off, but I have

979
00:43:56,320 --> 00:43:57,879
Speaker 2: to get this out because I don't feel like a fart,

980
00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:02,479
Speaker 2: like an emotional fart. Find yourself a good therapist, one

981
00:44:02,560 --> 00:44:06,319
Speaker 2: that is down to do sessions with you and then

982
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:09,080
Speaker 2: also bring your partner in, and that way you can

983
00:44:09,120 --> 00:44:12,320
Speaker 2: set yourself up for success and then have it organically

984
00:44:12,400 --> 00:44:16,480
Speaker 2: come up in therapy. So you do have someone that

985
00:44:16,760 --> 00:44:19,160
Speaker 2: can speak on your behalf and really unpack it in

986
00:44:19,200 --> 00:44:21,160
Speaker 2: a very responsible way.

987
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:23,399
Speaker 4: I think it's very smart. That's a lot to take

988
00:44:23,440 --> 00:44:24,640
Speaker 4: on yourself.

989
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:27,759
Speaker 5: And you're yeah, your person might have big emotions and

990
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:29,839
Speaker 5: there are allowed to have big emotions to what you said,

991
00:44:29,880 --> 00:44:31,440
Speaker 5: they might not, but it'd be nice to have a

992
00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:35,640
Speaker 5: professional third party to help help you navigate.

993
00:44:36,680 --> 00:44:39,320
Speaker 3: I think, I think what I'm emotionally honest. I expect

994
00:44:40,040 --> 00:44:42,000
Speaker 3: to say what I'm going to say in a vacuum,

995
00:44:42,040 --> 00:44:52,000
Speaker 3: and I expect no pushback and a response. That's what's

996
00:44:52,080 --> 00:44:52,360
Speaker 3: kept me.

997
00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:55,600
Speaker 4: God, oh my god.

998
00:44:58,160 --> 00:44:59,840
Speaker 1: All right, get out there and be somebody.

999
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:05,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is adulting, right, Like relationships are hard and

1000
00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:09,080
Speaker 2: growing up is hard. Like it doesn't matter what decades

1001
00:45:09,080 --> 00:45:11,480
Speaker 2: you're in, you could still be in your fucket phase.

1002
00:45:11,560 --> 00:45:13,960
Speaker 2: But that just means you're going on a cruise, like

1003
00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:15,360
Speaker 2: we get titties out, you know what I mean. Like

1004
00:45:15,440 --> 00:45:18,320
Speaker 2: everybody's fucking face is different, but like the fucking phase

1005
00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:21,359
Speaker 2: can really just enter every chapter of your life and

1006
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:24,480
Speaker 2: you still need help, especially.

1007
00:45:24,040 --> 00:45:27,480
Speaker 4: Now that like we don't have this generational bullshit.

1008
00:45:27,080 --> 00:45:30,000
Speaker 2: On like living together, not being married or getting a

1009
00:45:30,040 --> 00:45:32,680
Speaker 2: divorced or like not having kids or just making enough

1010
00:45:32,719 --> 00:45:34,399
Speaker 2: money and a bunch of like the things that were

1011
00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:37,279
Speaker 2: important to our parents. Now we are left with like

1012
00:45:37,320 --> 00:45:40,000
Speaker 2: a lot of options because we can like define our happiness.

1013
00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:42,000
Speaker 2: And so when you have a lot of options, like

1014
00:45:42,040 --> 00:45:43,839
Speaker 2: me at a buffet, I'm like, well, now I don't

1015
00:45:43,880 --> 00:45:44,600
Speaker 2: know where to go.

1016
00:45:44,960 --> 00:45:47,279
Speaker 4: Because almost too many options? And how do I do it?

1017
00:45:47,320 --> 00:45:47,919
Speaker 1: You know what I mean?

1018
00:45:47,960 --> 00:45:49,200
Speaker 4: And so you just need a little help.

1019
00:45:49,840 --> 00:45:51,680
Speaker 2: You know. We can talk about these things, and so

1020
00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:54,720
Speaker 2: I really hope that you talk about this with your partner.

1021
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:58,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, because if you don't integrate truth emotional truths into

1022
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,760
Speaker 3: your relationship from the get then resentments can build.

1023
00:46:02,000 --> 00:46:02,200
Speaker 1: Right.

1024
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:05,600
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, it's like those are just tremmors that can

1025
00:46:05,640 --> 00:46:07,040
Speaker 3: then lead to a big old quake.

1026
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:13,560
Speaker 1: You know. You know what in the black church is

1027
00:46:13,600 --> 00:46:17,040
Speaker 1: going on? Right now?

1028
00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:23,200
Speaker 4: Where is my tambourine? I love it?

1029
00:46:23,440 --> 00:46:25,560
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah. We gotta practice it every day or as

1030
00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:26,400
Speaker 1: often as we can.

1031
00:46:26,320 --> 00:46:27,240
Speaker 4: As much as possible.

1032
00:46:27,320 --> 00:46:31,760
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, So this has been just a motherfucking joy.

1033
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:33,640
Speaker 4: Now you know what the deal is?

1034
00:46:33,760 --> 00:46:37,600
Speaker 2: But we ask all our guests, what's the most adult

1035
00:46:37,680 --> 00:46:39,479
Speaker 2: thing you want to do for yourself that you haven't

1036
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:40,840
Speaker 2: had a chance to do for yourself yet that you

1037
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:41,200
Speaker 2: want to do?

1038
00:46:41,239 --> 00:46:43,960
Speaker 4: And it could be anything big or small or medium size.

1039
00:46:44,120 --> 00:46:49,919
Speaker 4: I'm not gonna body shame, thank you for the body.

1040
00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 1: My goals, your medium goals, go ahead.

1041
00:46:56,040 --> 00:46:59,280
Speaker 5: I bought my house two years ago. Housework and renovations

1042
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:02,359
Speaker 5: and whatnot. It's never going to end. It's ongoing. But

1043
00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 5: I'm really excited for the moment where I'm like I

1044
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:06,080
Speaker 5: can just sit for a minute.

1045
00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:08,320
Speaker 4: Like I had to do an overhaul in the yard.

1046
00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:11,200
Speaker 5: I had to fix this thing, and I'm very excited

1047
00:47:11,239 --> 00:47:13,480
Speaker 5: to be like, no one's coming to my house to

1048
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:14,160
Speaker 5: fix anything.

1049
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:16,680
Speaker 4: It's done. I can just enjoy it for a minute.

1050
00:47:16,840 --> 00:47:21,680
Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, feeling close to getting it where I want.

1051
00:47:21,920 --> 00:47:22,800
Speaker 4: That's what I'm excited for it.

1052
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:23,279
Speaker 1: I love that.

1053
00:47:23,440 --> 00:47:26,960
Speaker 2: Oh nothing's felt so good. You just speaking to my soul.

1054
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:30,000
Speaker 2: Just had a kitchen renovations. So I'm like, oh my god,

1055
00:47:30,080 --> 00:47:31,200
Speaker 2: get the fuck out of my house.

1056
00:47:31,560 --> 00:47:34,560
Speaker 4: I know I'm about to get like windows replaced for

1057
00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:38,440
Speaker 4: what Oh no, no, no, no, no, that's the most

1058
00:47:38,480 --> 00:47:41,320
Speaker 4: adult thing ever. This house is like from the twenties.

1059
00:47:41,400 --> 00:47:41,720
Speaker 1: Wow.

1060
00:47:41,760 --> 00:47:44,839
Speaker 5: And the windows are all single pane. The air that's

1061
00:47:44,840 --> 00:47:46,160
Speaker 5: outside just comes inside.

1062
00:47:46,360 --> 00:47:47,040
Speaker 1: Oh my god.

1063
00:47:47,239 --> 00:47:48,800
Speaker 4: Yeah, things have to change.

1064
00:47:48,880 --> 00:47:50,799
Speaker 2: My house is nineteen ten. So I was like, so

1065
00:47:50,840 --> 00:47:53,160
Speaker 2: everybody remembers the Titanic, Okay.

1066
00:47:54,920 --> 00:47:58,279
Speaker 1: The house remembers yeah, my heart will go on.

1067
00:47:59,480 --> 00:48:01,319
Speaker 4: Ah, I love your friend. It's so good to see you.

1068
00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:04,400
Speaker 4: It's so good to see you. Yes, this is a

1069
00:48:04,480 --> 00:48:05,600
Speaker 4: joy to you for having me.

1070
00:48:05,840 --> 00:48:16,080
Speaker 3: Thanks so much this year. It's almost like a ride,

1071
00:48:16,520 --> 00:48:16,799
Speaker 3: you know.

1072
00:48:17,080 --> 00:48:18,840
Speaker 4: Yes, but like a nice ride.

1073
00:48:18,960 --> 00:48:22,120
Speaker 1: Oh it's the best magic mountain. It's lovely, you know,

1074
00:48:22,360 --> 00:48:22,839
Speaker 1: do it again.

1075
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:25,120
Speaker 4: You know what I love. It's giving old souls that

1076
00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:26,240
Speaker 4: become young spirits.

1077
00:48:26,560 --> 00:48:30,960
Speaker 1: Mmmmm, I've never heard you say something like that before.

1078
00:48:31,200 --> 00:48:33,000
Speaker 4: What do you mean I say it all the time.

1079
00:48:33,320 --> 00:48:33,799
Speaker 1: No, you don't.

1080
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:38,360
Speaker 3: You are a furnace just coming forth with these new quips,

1081
00:48:38,480 --> 00:48:40,719
Speaker 3: ideas and thoughts that, as I say, it should be

1082
00:48:40,719 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 3: on stickers, magnets, billboards.

1083
00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:44,080
Speaker 1: But I haven't heard that one before.

1084
00:48:44,200 --> 00:48:46,399
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I mean I was an old soul for sure,

1085
00:48:46,640 --> 00:48:46,840
Speaker 4: you know.

1086
00:48:47,040 --> 00:48:47,840
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.

1087
00:48:47,840 --> 00:48:50,279
Speaker 2: When you are the only child, you're like one of

1088
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:53,719
Speaker 2: two types. You're like forever the baby, or you're like

1089
00:48:53,719 --> 00:48:57,160
Speaker 2: the third person you hang out with like other adults

1090
00:48:57,239 --> 00:49:00,320
Speaker 2: a lot, or you're the older kid taking care of

1091
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:02,880
Speaker 2: the younger kids. You know, you can go in a

1092
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:07,920
Speaker 2: corner and like entertain yourself. You're listening to Otis Redding

1093
00:49:08,040 --> 00:49:10,200
Speaker 2: and Sam Cook. You're just listening to like what everyone

1094
00:49:10,280 --> 00:49:11,080
Speaker 2: else listens.

1095
00:49:10,800 --> 00:49:13,160
Speaker 1: To, you know what I mean? So, at what age

1096
00:49:13,160 --> 00:49:14,520
Speaker 1: were you listening to Otis Redding?

1097
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:18,480
Speaker 2: I mean since since my broad Up scene? Wow, since

1098
00:49:18,480 --> 00:49:21,719
Speaker 2: the broad Up scene. You know, Like I remember being

1099
00:49:21,800 --> 00:49:24,000
Speaker 2: four or five years old and dancing to Rita Marley

1100
00:49:24,040 --> 00:49:27,040
Speaker 2: I want to get high, not knowing she was talking

1101
00:49:27,080 --> 00:49:31,279
Speaker 2: about the Ganja. But I'm just like one draw like

1102
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:35,120
Speaker 2: it was so good. Hey, rodamon, Hey what miss it?

1103
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:39,120
Speaker 2: You know you're just like eh, like it's just words

1104
00:49:39,160 --> 00:49:41,640
Speaker 2: and noises to you don't know what you're actually singing about.

1105
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:43,399
Speaker 4: And that's like was me at four or five?

1106
00:49:43,560 --> 00:49:43,759
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1107
00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:44,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, No.

1108
00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:47,040
Speaker 2: Lately I've been staring in the mirror. I would sing

1109
00:49:47,080 --> 00:49:49,959
Speaker 2: that song in the mirror at five and six.

1110
00:49:50,160 --> 00:49:53,520
Speaker 1: Wait, Stevie Wonder, Yes you were singing that song. Oh

1111
00:49:53,560 --> 00:49:54,240
Speaker 1: my gosh.

1112
00:49:54,360 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, sometimes lip syncing for my life in the mirror

1113
00:49:56,680 --> 00:49:58,160
Speaker 2: before we actually knew what that was.

1114
00:50:00,120 --> 00:50:02,200
Speaker 4: Types of stuff, all types of stuff.

1115
00:50:02,239 --> 00:50:04,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, you were a heavy kid, like you were like

1116
00:50:04,600 --> 00:50:07,480
Speaker 3: deep kid, like you were going places that's trenchant.

1117
00:50:07,840 --> 00:50:11,960
Speaker 2: But now I'm like the big today, freckle monster. Like

1118
00:50:12,000 --> 00:50:17,360
Speaker 2: I'm just having multiple Halloween parties and meet ball parties

1119
00:50:17,520 --> 00:50:20,160
Speaker 2: just seemed party pity by day, you know what I mean,

1120
00:50:20,880 --> 00:50:23,560
Speaker 2: like telling jokes for a living like it's silly.

1121
00:50:24,160 --> 00:50:27,239
Speaker 3: So do you feel like the older you get, the

1122
00:50:27,239 --> 00:50:29,760
Speaker 3: more we go down this path, do you feel closer

1123
00:50:29,840 --> 00:50:31,319
Speaker 3: to being the kid you wanted to be?

1124
00:50:32,040 --> 00:50:33,440
Speaker 4: I mean yes and no.

1125
00:50:33,840 --> 00:50:36,080
Speaker 2: I wouldn't trade that journey in for the world, because

1126
00:50:36,120 --> 00:50:39,560
Speaker 2: it definitely made me who I was, how I appreciate things,

1127
00:50:39,560 --> 00:50:43,200
Speaker 2: how I moved through life, and how empathetic I am.

1128
00:50:43,239 --> 00:50:47,320
Speaker 2: So I'm glad I knew what hard times were before

1129
00:50:47,360 --> 00:50:50,000
Speaker 2: I was supposed to. I don't know that I necessarily

1130
00:50:50,239 --> 00:50:52,439
Speaker 2: wish that for my kids, but also it's like out

1131
00:50:52,440 --> 00:50:54,920
Speaker 2: of my hands. Yeah, I just can do what I

1132
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,680
Speaker 2: can do and be open to the fact that they

1133
00:50:57,800 --> 00:51:01,839
Speaker 2: might come home and tell me stores of people being

1134
00:51:01,880 --> 00:51:03,120
Speaker 2: mean to them, and I have to like sort of

1135
00:51:03,160 --> 00:51:05,440
Speaker 2: accept it and guide them as opposed to like what

1136
00:51:05,520 --> 00:51:08,799
Speaker 2: happened with me. But I obviously like don't want to

1137
00:51:08,800 --> 00:51:10,759
Speaker 2: coddle them, but I definitely want them to.

1138
00:51:10,760 --> 00:51:12,480
Speaker 4: Know that they have a safe place.

1139
00:51:13,000 --> 00:51:14,920
Speaker 2: I was talking to a friend who has like a

1140
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:17,759
Speaker 2: nineteen year old and she was like, ugh, I tried

1141
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:19,640
Speaker 2: to spell all the things my mom put upon me,

1142
00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,160
Speaker 2: and now like I have the kid that talks too much,

1143
00:51:22,760 --> 00:51:25,479
Speaker 2: like she's getting her feelings. It's like, can we wrap

1144
00:51:25,560 --> 00:51:29,080
Speaker 2: up this conversation. It's like no, and another thing, mom,

1145
00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 2: And it's like.

1146
00:51:29,640 --> 00:51:32,280
Speaker 1: Oh shit, oh my god.

1147
00:51:32,800 --> 00:51:33,760
Speaker 4: Oh yeah.

1148
00:51:34,080 --> 00:51:36,680
Speaker 2: Because everything is so rush You rush the kids in school,

1149
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:38,400
Speaker 2: you rush them out of school, you rush them to

1150
00:51:38,400 --> 00:51:40,040
Speaker 2: get their homework the test.

1151
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:43,120
Speaker 4: Can you who finishes their test first? Everything is so rushed.

1152
00:51:43,360 --> 00:51:44,920
Speaker 1: Everything is so rush, you know, when.

1153
00:51:44,880 --> 00:51:47,600
Speaker 2: We fucking sit down and actually listen to somebody, like

1154
00:51:47,680 --> 00:51:49,840
Speaker 2: even like my kids walking in a parking lot, I'm like,

1155
00:51:50,000 --> 00:51:53,479
Speaker 2: hurry up, Oh wait, no, you're teeny tiny, take your time.

1156
00:51:53,600 --> 00:51:55,480
Speaker 3: It's fine. Yeah, I know I do the same thing.

1157
00:51:55,719 --> 00:51:57,880
Speaker 3: One thing I think that really helps for anybody that

1158
00:51:57,920 --> 00:51:59,360
Speaker 3: needs to hear this. If you want to talk to

1159
00:51:59,400 --> 00:52:03,319
Speaker 3: your kids, I know it sounds so like teen like

1160
00:52:03,400 --> 00:52:08,240
Speaker 3: youth pastor whatever. Sit down on the floor with them, yeah,

1161
00:52:08,280 --> 00:52:11,520
Speaker 3: and talk to them their level, their level. Let the

1162
00:52:11,520 --> 00:52:14,359
Speaker 3: butt hit the floor, and it feels so like we

1163
00:52:14,400 --> 00:52:16,440
Speaker 3: had a nice chat. Like I always have to tell

1164
00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:18,799
Speaker 3: my daughter, like you're not in trouble, but I'm going

1165
00:52:18,880 --> 00:52:20,520
Speaker 3: to just talk to you about this, that and the

1166
00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 3: third and it feels so much better.

1167
00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:26,880
Speaker 1: I'm going to do that from now on. Yo. Yeah,

1168
00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:27,319
Speaker 1: that's me.

1169
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:28,280
Speaker 4: It's the best.

1170
00:52:29,040 --> 00:52:31,680
Speaker 2: Sometimes I just don't say anything, yeah, because I know

1171
00:52:31,760 --> 00:52:34,359
Speaker 2: that they've been at a school where they have been

1172
00:52:34,400 --> 00:52:38,040
Speaker 2: over corrected all day. M sit down, get up, do this,

1173
00:52:38,160 --> 00:52:40,279
Speaker 2: don't do that. And then like being around with the

1174
00:52:40,320 --> 00:52:42,759
Speaker 2: kids is exhausting, and they're kids, but they're around other

1175
00:52:42,920 --> 00:52:45,840
Speaker 2: kids who like are freaking out, who want to play,

1176
00:52:45,960 --> 00:52:48,239
Speaker 2: who are too rough, who were too nice, who don't

1177
00:52:48,239 --> 00:52:50,279
Speaker 2: go away, and so they don't have a space and

1178
00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:50,960
Speaker 2: so there it's.

1179
00:52:50,840 --> 00:52:52,000
Speaker 4: Like sensory overload.

1180
00:52:52,200 --> 00:52:55,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, And so sometimes I'm just like, we could be quiet.

1181
00:52:56,200 --> 00:52:56,719
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1182
00:52:56,760 --> 00:52:57,760
Speaker 1: Who likes that the most?

1183
00:52:58,160 --> 00:53:01,000
Speaker 4: I mean definitely ode is Yeah.

1184
00:53:01,160 --> 00:53:04,080
Speaker 2: But what I love about we can be quiet is

1185
00:53:04,120 --> 00:53:07,400
Speaker 2: like that's when they want to talk. So I just

1186
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:10,959
Speaker 2: like let them talk. I'm not even saying anything. I'm

1187
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:13,239
Speaker 2: just listening because they want someone to actually listen to

1188
00:53:13,280 --> 00:53:16,839
Speaker 2: them instead of them having to listen to somebody else

1189
00:53:16,880 --> 00:53:17,319
Speaker 2: all day.

1190
00:53:17,480 --> 00:53:19,919
Speaker 1: Can I say something now, Yes, you're a good mom.

1191
00:53:20,360 --> 00:53:22,359
Speaker 4: Oh, thank you you're a good mom. I'll take that.

1192
00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:24,279
Speaker 3: You really are, thank you so much. Yeah, I know

1193
00:53:24,320 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 3: you're thinking about getting them right.

1194
00:53:25,440 --> 00:53:26,040
Speaker 4: Now, I am.

1195
00:53:26,120 --> 00:53:28,560
Speaker 2: I'm like, are we done. All right, I gotta go.

1196
00:53:28,560 --> 00:53:30,160
Speaker 2: I gotta go get my kids. I gotta get my kids.

1197
00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:34,400
Speaker 2: Thank you everyone, good bye bye.

1198
00:53:35,880 --> 00:53:37,480
Speaker 1: This has been an exactly right production.

1199
00:53:37,800 --> 00:53:39,600
Speaker 4: Our senior producer is g Holley.

1200
00:53:40,000 --> 00:53:41,840
Speaker 1: Art Associate producer is Christina Chamberlain.

1201
00:53:42,120 --> 00:53:44,200
Speaker 4: This episode was mixed by John Bradley.

1202
00:53:44,520 --> 00:53:46,040
Speaker 1: Our guest booker is Patrick Cottner.

1203
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:48,680
Speaker 4: Additional production support from Hannah Kyle Crichton.

1204
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:51,719
Speaker 3: Theme song and live show DJing is by DJ don Will,

1205
00:53:52,120 --> 00:53:53,239
Speaker 3: artwork by Jamie.

1206
00:53:53,000 --> 00:53:56,000
Speaker 2: Bechtel, Photography by Guys vander Molson.

1207
00:53:56,280 --> 00:53:59,960
Speaker 3: Executive produced by Karen Kilgera, Georgia Hartstar and Daniel Kramer.

1208
00:54:00,200 --> 00:54:02,680
Speaker 4: Follow the show on Instagram at Adulting Thepod.

1209
00:54:03,040 --> 00:54:14,040
Speaker 3: Email your questions to Adulting Questions at gmail dot com