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Speaker 1: All right, guys, we've been talking about it all morning,

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Speaker 1: We've been talking about it all week. We've been talking

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Speaker 1: about it a lot. Just a quick reminder here, there

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Speaker 1: are sixty two days until November third election. Okay, go

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Speaker 1: right now to get registered to vote. Go to vote

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Speaker 1: dot org. All right. It takes a couple of minutes,

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Speaker 1: and you can also get your dates for when you

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Speaker 1: can early vote in your state. Okay, please do this.

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Speaker 1: There's we're on a mission right here. We're on a mission. Wow.

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Speaker 1: We gotta get it done too. Let's not stop until

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Speaker 1: it's finished. Okay, time now for today's Strawberry Letter. If

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Speaker 1: you need advice and relationships on dating, work, sex, parenting,

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Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM

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Speaker 1: dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be

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Speaker 1: reading your letter live on the air, just like we're

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Speaker 1: gonna read this one right here, right now. Okay, Margot

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Speaker 1: lappinhold on tight, We got it for you. Here he

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Speaker 1: is the Strawberry Letter. Thank you. Nephew's subjects picked me

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Speaker 1: or your mamma. Dear Stephen Shirley, I am a young

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Speaker 1: woman in my early thirties, and I have been dating

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Speaker 1: a forty four year old man for ten years. We

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Speaker 1: have had a great relationship until recently when his mother

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Speaker 1: moved to the city we live in. Since then, we've

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Speaker 1: been fussing more and I'm really starting to dislike him.

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Speaker 1: His true colors are showing all because of his mother.

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Speaker 1: We cannot move on with our lives. Because his mother

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Speaker 1: is stuck on her son not being with her whenever

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Speaker 1: he has extra time in his schedule, she manipulates him

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Speaker 1: into thinking she's going to die alone one day because

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Speaker 1: he doesn't see her daily. I have made him realize

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Speaker 1: that she wasn't complaining as much when she didn't live

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Speaker 1: this close to us. He told his mother that we

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Speaker 1: are finally going to get married, and she told him

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Speaker 1: that if he marries me, she will not be around

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Speaker 1: to watch it go down. I do not know when

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Speaker 1: things change between his mother and I because we've always

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Speaker 1: been cordial and respectful to each other. It makes me

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Speaker 1: wonder if my man has told her something about me.

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Speaker 1: He says he would never tell her anything negative about

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Speaker 1: me because he knows how she is. This man loves

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Speaker 1: his mama and he loves me, so I'm stuck in

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Speaker 1: the middle. Always the one trying to smooth things over

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Speaker 1: with his mom while she dotes on her son and

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Speaker 1: overlooks me. I'm not trying to come between a mom

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Speaker 1: and a son. But come on, we are grown people.

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Speaker 1: We aren't married. We aren't married, so I can leave

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Speaker 1: him at any time. And he knows I'm ready to

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Speaker 1: call it quits, and he's begged me to give him

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Speaker 1: one give him more time to talk to his mom.

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Speaker 1: Should I leave him alone now and move on with

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Speaker 1: my life or should I go through with the wedding

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Speaker 1: and just avoid his nasty acting mama After ten years,

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Speaker 1: I say it's time to blink or get off the

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Speaker 1: pot anyway. I mean, I just say, don't let this

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Speaker 1: forty four year old mama's boy, because that's what it is,

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Speaker 1: have any more of your time. If he doesn't put

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Speaker 1: you first now before he marries you, what do you

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Speaker 1: think marriage is going to be like with him? Every

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Speaker 1: time Mama calls, he's gonna leave you and run right

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Speaker 1: over there to be with mama. You say this man

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Speaker 1: loves you, well, I gotta say this love would put

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Speaker 1: you first. Love would stand up to his mama on

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Speaker 1: your behalf. Love would not let his mom manipulate him

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Speaker 1: love would not have to have you stuck in the middle.

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Speaker 1: You would be upfront. You would be outfront where you belong.

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Speaker 1: And no, I don't think you should go through with

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Speaker 1: the wedding and just avoid his nasty acting. Mama. You

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Speaker 1: deserve way better. And it's time now for the boy,

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Speaker 1: the son, the mama's boy, to let his mom know

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Speaker 1: exactly how he feels about you. And you know, respectfully,

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Speaker 1: of course it's his mom, but he's got to let

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Speaker 1: her know that she can't do this. I mean, like

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Speaker 1: you say, she wasn't doing it when she didn't live

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Speaker 1: in the same city. Now she is being very manipulative.

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Speaker 1: It reminds me of the Jeffersons the TV show, George's

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Speaker 1: mom and his mama and Wheezy that dynamic. So no,

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Speaker 1: don't let this go down. If you feel like you

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Speaker 1: need to get out of there because he's treating you

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Speaker 1: not like the queen you are, then you guts to go. Steve,

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Speaker 1: really ridiculous letter kind of in a way, because there's

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Speaker 1: so many things You forty four year old man, you

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Speaker 1: and your early thirties, you've been dating a man for

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Speaker 1: ten years. What is going got a great relationship until

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Speaker 1: his mama moved to the city we live in. Oh,

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Speaker 1: Hall came to town. Now y'all been fussing. Huh what happened?

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Speaker 1: I said, Hale came to town. Oh hell here co one.

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Speaker 1: Hell yeah, Hell came to town. Now here's a his

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Speaker 1: true colors are showing all because of his mother. It's

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Speaker 1: what she says. We cannot move on with our lives

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Speaker 1: because his mother stuck on her son not being with her.

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Speaker 1: Whenever he has extra time in his schedule. Why does

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Speaker 1: his mama know his schedule. Let's start there. So now

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Speaker 1: every waning moment he got, he got to give to her,

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Speaker 1: and then she always teldbut she gonna die alone one

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Speaker 1: day because he don't see her daily. I mean, it's

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Speaker 1: cool if you could see your mama daily. I wish

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Speaker 1: I could see mine. But my mama was living. I

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Speaker 1: didn't see her every day. You know, which had some

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Speaker 1: more time, would? I'll admit that, But every day you know,

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Speaker 1: you know, if you was twelve, I saw my mom

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Speaker 1: Mary day. I was twelve, I was at the house

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Speaker 1: I saw every day down sixteen, right up until I

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Speaker 1: was seventeen and moved out. Once I moved out, I

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Speaker 1: never really could go back to my mom and daddy house.

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Speaker 1: Now you Shirley's absolutely correct. You got a mama's born

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Speaker 1: on head, and it seemed like ain't nowhere around it. Now.

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Speaker 1: He told his mother that y'all was finally gonna getting married.

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Speaker 1: She told him if he married me, she would not

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Speaker 1: be around to watch it go down. What do that mean?

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Speaker 1: She gonna die, she gonna move back out of town,

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Speaker 1: She ain't coming to the wind, she gonna get sick.

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Speaker 1: What do it mean? I don't even know what that means.

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Speaker 1: I ain't gonna be around, lady. Why? Yeah, he can't

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Speaker 1: marry you. The boy can't marry you. Jesus all right, Steve,

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Speaker 1: hang on, we'll have part two of your response coming

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Speaker 1: up at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's Strawberry

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Speaker 1: Letters subjects pick me or your mama. We'll get back

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Speaker 1: into it right after this. You're listening, all right, Steve.

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Speaker 1: Come on, let's recap today's Strawberry Letters subject pick me

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Speaker 1: or your mama for it for you, old man. She's

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Speaker 1: been dating for ten years. That's tricky right there. And

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Speaker 1: then his true colors came out when his mother moved

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Speaker 1: into the city. And now she got the man thinking that,

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Speaker 1: you know, and because if you're not spending all your

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Speaker 1: extra time with your mama, it's a problem. Well it

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Speaker 1: is a problem because nobody want to do that, not

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Speaker 1: every damn waking minute, you know. And then we got

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Speaker 1: down to he told his mother that we was gonna

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Speaker 1: get married. She told him and she married me, that

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Speaker 1: she gonna not be around and watch it go down. Dad.

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Speaker 1: I didn't understand. Are you gonna die, are you gonna

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Speaker 1: lead town? Are you sick about it? You just ain't

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Speaker 1: coming to the wedding? Whatever? And then the lady came

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Speaker 1: figure out when things changed between him and the mother,

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Speaker 1: because they always been cordial and respectful. Then it makes

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Speaker 1: me wonder if he just said something to the mama.

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Speaker 1: He said, he not, He just know how his mamma is.

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Speaker 1: So now you stuck in the middle, always trying to

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Speaker 1: smooth things over with his mom while she doats on

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Speaker 1: her son and overlooks me, Okay, this is atypical mama

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Speaker 1: boy read behavior. I'm not trying to come between a

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Speaker 1: mom and her son. That's not that you should have to.

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Speaker 1: If you're in a relationship with a man, you shouldn't

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Speaker 1: want to come between you shouldn't have to feel as

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Speaker 1: though I'm saying that you're coming between a man and

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Speaker 1: his mother. You shouldn't be made to feel that way.

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Speaker 1: Something's wrong. Come on, we grown people. Now, she says,

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Speaker 1: we're not married, so I can leave him at any time. Now, okay,

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Speaker 1: we're hold a punch of breaks. All of a sudden,

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Speaker 1: the truth came out. I can leave him any time.

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Speaker 1: He knows I'm ready to call it quit. And he

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Speaker 1: has begged me to give him more time to talk

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Speaker 1: to his mom. So you're ready to roll out? Sounds

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Speaker 1: like it? Yeah, damn the ten years that ain't got

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Speaker 1: I ain't mad at you about that. Damn the ten years.

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Speaker 1: They don't need to put in ten more in just

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Speaker 1: like it. So damn the ten years, Damn the love,

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Speaker 1: Damn the wedding vials to hair with his mama. I

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Speaker 1: roll out, I pull up, put up dus. Who whoo

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Speaker 1: I'm about? Now? Should I leave him alone now and

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Speaker 1: move on with my life? Or should I go through

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Speaker 1: the wed and just avoid his nasty actor mama? That's

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Speaker 1: gonna be impossible. Shutley's right. And I was talking to

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Speaker 1: somebody today, a contractor at my house, and he said

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Speaker 1: a counselor told him he went to counseling for his relationship.

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Speaker 1: When a person shows you who they are, believe though,

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Speaker 1: that's why the guy sent to counseling. I've heard that,

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Speaker 1: but he said a counselor told him today, when a

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Speaker 1: person shows you who they really are, believe them. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you should believe him. He showed you who he really is,

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Speaker 1: who he really gonna be loyal to, and who who's

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Speaker 1: really gonna he's gonna place first. Surely said you should

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Speaker 1: be first. Now he's showing you you're not fit to

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Speaker 1: be first. I need some time to talk to her.

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Speaker 1: The conversation is real simple, Mama, Mama, you're tripping down.

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Speaker 1: You need to quit talking to her like that. This

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Speaker 1: is my girl. Then you talking to a crazy gotta

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Speaker 1: feeling some kind of way, and that ain't right. And

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Speaker 1: if you keep doing that, I ain't bringing her around

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Speaker 1: and I ain't coming around. And you respect who I

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Speaker 1: am and what I want to do. That's that's a

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Speaker 1: simple conversation. Now, mama's boys. Is hard to have that

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Speaker 1: conversation because they Mama's boy, you don't talk to me

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Speaker 1: that way. Shut your stupid ass up. And then he

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Speaker 1: going and answer down somewhere. That's mama talking. Yeah, No,

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Speaker 1: my mom hain't never done me like that because number one,

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Speaker 1: I ain't never talked back to mine. I couldn't, wasn't allowed.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, it was my mother. But my mother never interfered.

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Speaker 1: So I don't know what to tell you, lady. I

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Speaker 1: was going about you seem like you said rather casual.

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Speaker 1: We ain't married, so I could leave him at any time.

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Speaker 1: He know I'm ready to call it quitch. He'd begged

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Speaker 1: me to give him more time to talk to his mama.

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Speaker 1: Should I leave him alone now and move on with

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Speaker 1: my life? Or should I go through the wedding and

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Speaker 1: just avoid his nasty acting? Mom? Just go through with

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Speaker 1: the wedding? That right there? Yeah? Should I just leave

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Speaker 1: him now? Or should I just go through? Go through

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Speaker 1: with the wedding? That don't even sound right. Listen, listen

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Speaker 1: to me, and don't be half for me. Tommy Caller

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Speaker 1: and Shelly, don't just sign up talking about you're gonna

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Speaker 1: just go through with the wed not But this is

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Speaker 1: I got this way too many. You can't just go

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Speaker 1: through it moments in marriage. His advice I give to everybody.

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Speaker 1: We were talking about this off today. Three things you

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Speaker 1: got to have. You have to be in love with

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Speaker 1: the person. You have to like a person, and you

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Speaker 1: have to love the person. In love is different from

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Speaker 1: loving them. So you need to be in love. You

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Speaker 1: need to be uh. You need to like them, and

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Speaker 1: you need to love them because on any given day,

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Speaker 1: one of them can be missing and the other two

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Speaker 1: guys to take it take care of you. Any any

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Speaker 1: on any date, one of them could just turn up missing.

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Speaker 1: I don't like his ass today, so that's it, all right,

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Speaker 1: I will surely run. All right, listen up, post your comments,

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Steve. Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter

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Speaker 1: at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook, and please

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Speaker 1: check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand now coming

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Speaker 1: up at forty six minutes after the hour, it's Sports

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Speaker 1: Talk with Junior. You know, right after this you're listening

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Speaker 1: to the Steve Harvey Morning Show