WEBVTT - “I GOT SOBER TO YO-YO” 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:04.560 Hello, listeners of the Therapy Gecko podcast. Welcome. My name 0:00:04.640 --> 0:00:09.639 is Lyle. I'm a gecko human guy thing person. I'm 0:00:09.640 --> 0:00:13.040 a man. I'm in a gecko suit. It's really hot. 0:00:13.840 --> 0:00:16.599 I'm in a park in New York City. There's a 0:00:16.640 --> 0:00:19.400 lot of people around this park, and I want to 0:00:19.440 --> 0:00:22.280 talk to them. I want to get lost in conversation. 0:00:22.440 --> 0:00:24.400 I need to exit my own brain. I need to 0:00:24.400 --> 0:00:28.480 be in life. I need to be I'm attempting to 0:00:28.520 --> 0:00:31.960 get into the flow state today by talking to people 0:00:32.680 --> 0:00:35.879 about their lives. So this is going to be a 0:00:35.880 --> 0:00:37.839 no phone call episode. It's going to be an in 0:00:37.960 --> 0:00:41.159 real life episode for those who are unfamiliar. Real life 0:00:42.080 --> 0:00:44.159 is that when you have a conversation with someone and 0:00:44.159 --> 0:00:48.120 there's no technology involved in the interface between the two people. 0:00:48.159 --> 0:00:51.440 Direct from one person's mouth into my ear, my mouth 0:00:51.440 --> 0:00:55.560 into their ear, and then yes, through technology into your ears. 0:00:56.000 --> 0:01:00.720 So we're in Washington Square Park, New York City. That's it. 0:01:00.800 --> 0:01:03.240 That's all I have to say. Let's talk to some people. Hey, 0:01:03.280 --> 0:01:05.080 what's up, man, what's going on? What's your name? 0:01:05.200 --> 0:01:05.520 Archie? 0:01:05.680 --> 0:01:07.399 Archie. Nice to meet you, Archie. That's your day going. 0:01:07.560 --> 0:01:09.480 Things are good? Things are good, very nice. Why are 0:01:09.480 --> 0:01:09.960 things good? 0:01:11.240 --> 0:01:11.640 I don't know. 0:01:11.760 --> 0:01:14.640 I think things have are very stable, things are serene, 0:01:14.760 --> 0:01:17.039 things are predictable, things are easy. 0:01:17.080 --> 0:01:18.200 Have they always been that way? 0:01:18.400 --> 0:01:18.560 No? 0:01:20.000 --> 0:01:23.440 I'm so please please hit me, so things are hold on. 0:01:23.480 --> 0:01:26.360 I just want to recount they were there, stable, serene, 0:01:26.440 --> 0:01:28.320 and predictable, and they were not always this way. 0:01:28.440 --> 0:01:32.319 Yeah, yeah, well I think I guess what do I 0:01:32.360 --> 0:01:35.120 think there's several reasons why they haven't always been this way. 0:01:35.200 --> 0:01:37.720 First off, I'm just entering a point in my life where, 0:01:38.319 --> 0:01:40.520 you know, I have like a job that's like a 0:01:40.600 --> 0:01:43.560 career job, so I'm like working on that great and 0:01:43.680 --> 0:01:46.240 like showing up to work every like showing up to 0:01:46.280 --> 0:01:49.720 work and just sort of being a worker and enjoying 0:01:49.720 --> 0:01:52.760 that part of life. I also think that, like, you know, 0:01:52.920 --> 0:01:55.560 so that's like I guess the like everyone gets to 0:01:55.600 --> 0:01:57.760 a point in their life where like stuff gets predictable 0:01:57.800 --> 0:02:01.040 in that way. Sure, but you know my life used 0:02:01.080 --> 0:02:05.800 to be I'm someone who is like so prone to chaos. Yeah, 0:02:06.080 --> 0:02:08.760 Like I love working in the gig economy. I love 0:02:09.000 --> 0:02:11.320 I love living a life where it's like I could 0:02:11.360 --> 0:02:15.280 go from like very high highs to like deep cavernous crashes. 0:02:16.160 --> 0:02:19.720 So sort of not being on that for like kind 0:02:19.720 --> 0:02:21.960 of the first time in my life feels pretty wonderful. 0:02:22.320 --> 0:02:25.200 Interesting, And uh, what how did that change? 0:02:25.840 --> 0:02:26.760 How did that change? 0:02:26.840 --> 0:02:28.480 Like did you just gotta you just got a job 0:02:28.520 --> 0:02:29.360 that's more predictable? 0:02:29.480 --> 0:02:34.399 Well, I think, okay, So there's like I I got 0:02:34.400 --> 0:02:36.520 sober four years ago, So I guess that was like 0:02:36.560 --> 0:02:38.519 one of the first things that like sort of was 0:02:38.600 --> 0:02:41.120 like a bid to make my life more stable. 0:02:41.320 --> 0:02:42.480 What it inspired you to get sober? 0:02:42.720 --> 0:02:42.840 Uh? 0:02:42.960 --> 0:02:45.000 Mainly because I was gonna die. Yeah, I was like 0:02:45.000 --> 0:02:48.520 pretty sure I was gonna die, either from drugs or 0:02:48.560 --> 0:02:49.400 just killing myself. 0:02:50.040 --> 0:02:50.880 Yeah, something like that. 0:02:51.280 --> 0:02:54.679 Can I ask what drugs? You were addicted to a whole. 0:02:54.520 --> 0:02:59.399 Lot of things most most of everything, uh, but primarily 0:02:59.480 --> 0:03:03.880 like and means, uh, loved ketamine, loved drinking, Yeah, love 0:03:03.919 --> 0:03:04.600 smoking weed. 0:03:04.880 --> 0:03:08.000 What were you and you're now you're you're gone from 0:03:08.000 --> 0:03:10.560 all those you don't smoke, you don't drink, you know, 0:03:10.720 --> 0:03:13.520 And were you like trying to get away from something? 0:03:14.400 --> 0:03:17.200 I think I well, I mean getting away from myself. 0:03:17.880 --> 0:03:21.760 My friend actually sent me something recently that's like the addict, 0:03:22.080 --> 0:03:26.840 Like the addict lives away from oneself. Yeah, so I 0:03:27.000 --> 0:03:30.360 was completely empty internally, because my entire life has just 0:03:30.400 --> 0:03:33.040 been just bids to try to get away from what 0:03:33.080 --> 0:03:34.680 it's like being inside of myself. 0:03:34.800 --> 0:03:37.880 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I said some There was a kid 0:03:37.920 --> 0:03:40.720 who just sat down before you and uh, he was like, 0:03:40.800 --> 0:03:42.480 how you doing? And I was like, I'm gonna tell 0:03:42.520 --> 0:03:44.480 him the truth, and I was like, I just went 0:03:44.560 --> 0:03:47.760 in to buy a Nintendo Switch to feel something. 0:03:48.040 --> 0:03:48.280 Yeah. 0:03:48.520 --> 0:03:50.080 And then I was like, does that ever happen to you? 0:03:50.160 --> 0:03:54.960 And he was like nah, he walked away, and I 0:03:55.000 --> 0:03:56.800 was like, oh, I think I was doing that to 0:03:56.840 --> 0:03:58.400 try to get away from myself. I mean I've done 0:03:58.400 --> 0:04:01.200 that with like drugs too. But I was like, yeah, 0:04:01.240 --> 0:04:03.200 I'm just always I'm familiar with the idea of like 0:04:03.200 --> 0:04:05.040 you're trying to get away from yourself in some sense, 0:04:05.280 --> 0:04:08.040 and then you want to try to make what's the 0:04:08.520 --> 0:04:10.600 what's the process for you been like off trying to 0:04:10.640 --> 0:04:13.480 make your brain a place where you don't want to 0:04:13.480 --> 0:04:14.080 get away from. 0:04:14.480 --> 0:04:16.760 I think, you know, it's I think part of it's 0:04:16.760 --> 0:04:20.800 my environment, like figuring out, like you know, what what 0:04:20.839 --> 0:04:23.400 do I really like what makes me whole? What are 0:04:23.400 --> 0:04:25.719 the things in my life that like I need to 0:04:25.880 --> 0:04:29.680 like feel complete and for me that's like I'm an extrovert. 0:04:29.720 --> 0:04:33.120 I love being around people. I charge around people. So 0:04:33.160 --> 0:04:35.120 I think that's one thing that I like try my 0:04:35.200 --> 0:04:38.320 best to like make attempts to like constantly feed that 0:04:38.440 --> 0:04:41.479 part of myself. And then also just like you know, 0:04:41.480 --> 0:04:43.320 they're just some things in my life that just make 0:04:43.400 --> 0:04:45.560 me happy. And if I can like do those with 0:04:45.640 --> 0:04:47.600 some frequency, I'm happy. 0:04:47.720 --> 0:04:48.640 What are those things? 0:04:48.800 --> 0:04:52.880 Let's see, I'm a professional yoyaer, so yeah, it's my 0:04:52.880 --> 0:04:54.720 favorite thing in the world. I love to yo yo, 0:04:55.240 --> 0:04:57.479 I love yoyo wing. And that's just something that like 0:04:58.040 --> 0:05:01.600 sort of in a very uncontroversial, easy way makes me happy. 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:04.680 I play a lot of magic gathering, started getting back 0:05:04.680 --> 0:05:08.839 into that, starting to crack open my dungeons and dragons, 0:05:08.920 --> 0:05:12.159 hyper fixation, Like all of those things like make me 0:05:12.279 --> 0:05:15.200 happy in a very just like easy way, and they 0:05:15.200 --> 0:05:19.000 also all involve community and like the sort of larger 0:05:19.080 --> 0:05:21.720 more conceptual ideas as to like what makes me feel whole. 0:05:21.839 --> 0:05:24.040 Yeah, yeah, oh I love that. I love that so much. 0:05:24.440 --> 0:05:27.159 So was it hard getting sober? Uh? 0:05:27.640 --> 0:05:32.599 I think the uh getting sober was hard. Staying sober 0:05:32.640 --> 0:05:36.479 has been harder. Yeah, yeah, I think staying sober is 0:05:36.480 --> 0:05:38.240 a lot of maintenance. And it's a lot of things 0:05:38.240 --> 0:05:40.680 that I'm not always especially when things are like fine. 0:05:41.040 --> 0:05:43.120 It's just things that I'm not always like super inclined 0:05:43.160 --> 0:05:43.400 to do. 0:05:43.839 --> 0:05:44.279 Like what. 0:05:46.920 --> 0:05:50.080 Without getting too into the details of what I do, 0:05:50.160 --> 0:05:54.600 I think, you know, like there's a lot of things like, uh, 0:05:55.320 --> 0:05:57.440 I'm trying not to like break my animinity on a 0:05:57.520 --> 0:06:00.400 very specific thing, but uh. 0:06:00.640 --> 0:06:02.120 I do appreciate. 0:06:02.480 --> 0:06:05.080 I have to, like, you know, keep in touch with 0:06:05.080 --> 0:06:07.040 people who are part of my support system, which is 0:06:07.080 --> 0:06:09.240 something I'm not always like inclined to do. If things 0:06:09.279 --> 0:06:12.200 are going well, I have to like make sure that 0:06:12.240 --> 0:06:14.479 I'm being of service to other people. And like I 0:06:14.560 --> 0:06:17.159 work as like a mental health and substance abuse counselor so, 0:06:17.360 --> 0:06:22.840 like I'm around early early addiction all the time, and 0:06:22.960 --> 0:06:25.000 like it's easy for me to like stay in the 0:06:25.000 --> 0:06:27.200 mindset of like, oh, this is something I should obviously 0:06:27.240 --> 0:06:29.520 stay away from, but it's very easy for me to 0:06:29.560 --> 0:06:32.200 focus just on their problems and like completely forget about 0:06:32.200 --> 0:06:34.480 the fact that I suffer from the exact same problems. 0:06:34.520 --> 0:06:38.200 I'm just several years separated from those problems. Yeah, yeah, 0:06:38.360 --> 0:06:39.240 can I ask how old you are? 0:06:39.400 --> 0:06:40.360 I'm twenty three years old. 0:06:40.520 --> 0:06:42.400 Cool, and so you got sober when you were in nineteen. 0:06:42.440 --> 0:06:43.560 I got sober when I was nineteen, and. 0:06:43.600 --> 0:06:46.480 Yeah, so you were mainly like in your addiction phase 0:06:46.480 --> 0:06:47.320 when you were like a kid. 0:06:47.480 --> 0:06:47.680 Yeah. 0:06:47.760 --> 0:06:51.160 No, I started using when I was like thirteen fourteen, 0:06:51.400 --> 0:06:56.040 and then things got bad around sixteen. And you know, 0:06:56.200 --> 0:07:00.760 like I am that, I am someone who like crashes 0:07:00.880 --> 0:07:03.440 very quickly, So I knew I was an addict probably 0:07:03.440 --> 0:07:05.560 by the time I was fifteen years old, and like 0:07:06.160 --> 0:07:08.840 was like very aware of that fact about myself and 0:07:08.880 --> 0:07:11.440 my my dad's been sober for years, so I've just 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:13.440 been sort of always aware of the fact that like 0:07:14.680 --> 0:07:17.080 drug addiction and getting sober is something that I either 0:07:17.160 --> 0:07:20.280 would deal with or just have to do at some 0:07:20.400 --> 0:07:22.400 point in my life. And it was almost like an 0:07:22.440 --> 0:07:24.960 aspiration growing up because I was like, oh, I feel 0:07:25.000 --> 0:07:29.480 so terrible inside of my unmedicated, sober self that like 0:07:29.920 --> 0:07:32.880 obviously makes sense that I'd like, you know, like this 0:07:32.960 --> 0:07:34.560 is the thing that's gonna work for me. And it 0:07:34.560 --> 0:07:37.440 did for like years, like drinking drugs that absolutely worked 0:07:37.440 --> 0:07:40.360 for me, until it stopped working for me. And like 0:07:40.400 --> 0:07:42.920 once it stops, like things got you know, things just 0:07:43.240 --> 0:07:45.400 it was bad already but you start to see how 0:07:45.440 --> 0:07:48.480 bad things are, and like I was just lucky enough 0:07:48.520 --> 0:07:52.000 to like see it enough that I had the moment 0:07:52.120 --> 0:07:53.960 to be like, all right, I'm done, Like I'm out, 0:07:54.120 --> 0:07:55.480 Like I can't do this anymore. 0:07:55.840 --> 0:07:59.160 And so what's your what's kind of your dreams for 0:07:59.200 --> 0:07:59.920 the future? Man? 0:08:00.080 --> 0:08:04.400 What are my dreams for the future. Well, there's like 0:08:04.480 --> 0:08:06.800 big dreams and small dreams, right, And I'm trying to 0:08:06.840 --> 0:08:09.960 like let go of the idea of like you see, 0:08:10.000 --> 0:08:12.160 I don't know what my life's going to be. I 0:08:12.200 --> 0:08:13.960 don't really want to know what my life's gonna be. 0:08:14.000 --> 0:08:17.200 I've completely bought out of I've fired myself as like 0:08:17.400 --> 0:08:20.560 the arbiter of my own future. Sure, I just want 0:08:20.560 --> 0:08:24.000 to be a person who helps other people. I want 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:27.320 to be kind to other people and whatever that leads 0:08:27.360 --> 0:08:29.560 me to whatever vehicle in my life that allows me 0:08:29.600 --> 0:08:32.040 to do that most effectively. I would like to continue 0:08:32.080 --> 0:08:35.080 doing that. But I also would like to make finals 0:08:35.080 --> 0:08:37.520 at the national yoyo contest next year. So that's a 0:08:37.559 --> 0:08:41.720 more like that's a more physical dream that we can 0:08:41.760 --> 0:08:42.160 point at. 0:08:42.240 --> 0:08:43.960 Yeah, so great, do you have like a like can 0:08:44.040 --> 0:08:45.880 people follow you if they want to see your yo yo? 0:08:46.000 --> 0:08:46.200 Yeah? 0:08:46.200 --> 0:08:46.520 They can. 0:08:46.920 --> 0:08:50.640 My instagram is a finite wizard, so like a wizard 0:08:50.640 --> 0:08:52.760 with limited capabilities. 0:08:52.160 --> 0:08:53.040 The finite wizard. 0:08:53.160 --> 0:08:56.760 Finite wizard. Yeah, not that, but just finite finite wizard, 0:08:56.800 --> 0:08:57.520 yeah wizard. 0:08:57.600 --> 0:08:59.760 And how did you get into yo yo ing? I 0:08:59.760 --> 0:09:00.840 feel that's very niche. 0:09:00.920 --> 0:09:03.400 Yeah, okay. I got into yo ing when I was 0:09:03.640 --> 0:09:07.200 twelve years old. I my little brother like got one, 0:09:07.840 --> 0:09:10.400 and I like picked it up and I was like, oh, 0:09:10.400 --> 0:09:11.720 this is kind of cool. And I looked it up 0:09:11.760 --> 0:09:15.480 on YouTube and I saw this yoyo er named Andrew Mader, 0:09:15.600 --> 0:09:18.080 who was the second best yoyoer in the United States 0:09:18.080 --> 0:09:20.800 in the year twenty fifteen. And I saw a video 0:09:20.800 --> 0:09:23.520 of him yo yo ing online and for some reason, 0:09:23.960 --> 0:09:25.280 something clicked to my head where it's like, if I 0:09:25.320 --> 0:09:27.280 can do this, if I can do what he's doing, 0:09:28.160 --> 0:09:31.080 I'm gonna like, I'm gonna be so happy with myself. 0:09:31.160 --> 0:09:33.360 I'm gonna feel so whole with who I am as 0:09:33.400 --> 0:09:37.040 a person. And something about just the hobby made so 0:09:37.160 --> 0:09:38.000 much sense to me. 0:09:40.200 --> 0:09:41.319 Now, what do you think about I have you ever 0:09:41.559 --> 0:09:42.760 seen the yo yo ball? 0:09:43.240 --> 0:09:43.920 The yo yo ball? 0:09:44.000 --> 0:09:44.200 Yeah? 0:09:44.440 --> 0:09:45.200 How what do you feel about? 0:09:45.280 --> 0:09:45.800 Yoyo ball? 0:09:45.880 --> 0:09:47.200 Is bullshit? Fake ass? 0:09:47.280 --> 0:09:50.240 Yo yo, fake ass yo yo, get a real yo yo, 0:09:50.640 --> 0:09:51.439 learn some tricks. 0:09:51.480 --> 0:09:51.680 Yeah. 0:09:51.679 --> 0:09:53.040 When I was a kid, I used to love the 0:09:53.120 --> 0:09:54.880 yoyo ball because it's like the yo yo, but it's 0:09:54.880 --> 0:09:56.400 like it's like if a yo at training wheel. 0:09:56.480 --> 0:09:58.679 Yes, no, exactly, exactly yeah. Yeah. 0:09:58.720 --> 0:10:01.960 Now do you have like a particular color of yoyo 0:10:02.040 --> 0:10:03.560 that you like or do you like the like what 0:10:03.640 --> 0:10:05.400 is it? What's the word for it? The ones that 0:10:05.400 --> 0:10:07.560 you went yo? You know, the shit you scratch and 0:10:07.600 --> 0:10:08.840 it makes like a DJ sound. 0:10:09.080 --> 0:10:14.280 Yeah, like, uh, well, there's the one I have. 0:10:15.320 --> 0:10:17.280 So I have a signature colorway of a yo yo 0:10:18.240 --> 0:10:21.640 that's just silver with kiss prints on it. Cool, but 0:10:21.840 --> 0:10:24.440 I like on stage, I like using raw yo yo's 0:10:24.559 --> 0:10:27.640 or like silver yoyo's like raw analyzed because I think 0:10:27.679 --> 0:10:32.840 it looks really good. But otherwise I like using like 0:10:32.880 --> 0:10:35.280 I just like any color that's pretty. I don't like 0:10:35.320 --> 0:10:37.240 anything too busy. I like things that are simple but 0:10:37.280 --> 0:10:39.640 also pretty. My friend Remy made a yoyo with like 0:10:39.880 --> 0:10:42.560 that looks like an Italian espresso machine with like red 0:10:42.600 --> 0:10:43.280 caps and stuff. 0:10:43.280 --> 0:10:43.640 It's cool. 0:10:43.720 --> 0:10:46.720 Yeah, cool, cool, cool man, that's awesome. So so you 0:10:46.760 --> 0:10:49.280 work as as an addiction counselor yes, I do. What 0:10:49.360 --> 0:10:50.960 kinds of things do you do to kind of help 0:10:51.000 --> 0:10:52.719 other people who are dealing with what you deal with? 0:10:53.640 --> 0:10:56.200 So my job, like ninety percent of my job is 0:10:56.400 --> 0:10:58.240 so I work at at a pretty low level position. 0:10:58.320 --> 0:11:00.839 I sort of just started my job sort of. I'm 0:11:00.880 --> 0:11:03.040 like a concierge for people that live in a sober 0:11:03.080 --> 0:11:05.120 living home. So my job is just to sort of 0:11:05.160 --> 0:11:07.880 help people on like a day to day basis, whether 0:11:07.920 --> 0:11:10.280 it's like, you know, just the nuts and bold stuff 0:11:10.320 --> 0:11:13.960 like handing out medication, you know, like conducting your an 0:11:13.960 --> 0:11:16.760 analysis tests all that stuff, making sure that the clients 0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:19.439 are safe. But in like a larger level, ninety five 0:11:19.480 --> 0:11:22.480 percent of my job is helping people who have lived 0:11:22.520 --> 0:11:25.720 a very isolated life find a form of community. Sure, 0:11:25.720 --> 0:11:29.360 because community is like if you are trying to get sober, 0:11:29.400 --> 0:11:31.760 trying to make a major change in your life, I 0:11:31.800 --> 0:11:35.200 think like getting a community that's based on accountability and 0:11:35.320 --> 0:11:38.360 like working together is like gonna get you eighty percent 0:11:38.400 --> 0:11:40.520 of the way there for like maintaining sobriety. 0:11:40.760 --> 0:11:42.000 That feels so nice. 0:11:42.360 --> 0:11:45.199 Yeah we're getting hit by a little wave of a 0:11:45.240 --> 0:11:46.240 win from the fountain. 0:11:46.360 --> 0:11:47.560 Yeah yeah, yeah. 0:11:47.600 --> 0:11:49.920 Community is really important. I mean, that's why like AA 0:11:49.960 --> 0:11:51.719 and all that stuff is very popular. Were you ever 0:11:51.760 --> 0:11:52.520 into any of those things? 0:11:52.559 --> 0:11:52.719 Yeah? 0:11:52.840 --> 0:11:56.439 No, I guess I'll just say I attend to A frequently. 0:11:56.600 --> 0:11:59.920 It's like a super helpful program for me. It's like 0:12:00.080 --> 0:12:02.719 how I found the community that like help's where I 0:12:02.800 --> 0:12:04.680 found a lot of good friends. It's where I've found 0:12:05.080 --> 0:12:07.360 this sort of like guidebook to what helps me stay 0:12:07.400 --> 0:12:08.720 sober one day at a time. 0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:11.280 What is the like, do you follow the twelve steps? 0:12:11.440 --> 0:12:13.520 I do, follow the twelve steps. I've done the twelve steps. 0:12:13.559 --> 0:12:16.319 I take guys through the twelve steps. Yeah, what do you? 0:12:16.600 --> 0:12:17.280 Uh uh? 0:12:17.840 --> 0:12:19.040 What are the twelve steps? 0:12:20.120 --> 0:12:26.640 The twelve steps are essentially a loose collection of suggestions 0:12:26.679 --> 0:12:31.680 designed to basically like give someone like a rubric for 0:12:31.800 --> 0:12:33.600 like what they need to do to like make a 0:12:34.520 --> 0:12:37.080 like start sustained change in their life. So it starts 0:12:37.080 --> 0:12:40.280 with it's sort of none of them. It's not actually 0:12:40.360 --> 0:12:42.840 AA's own thing, like it sort of is like a 0:12:42.880 --> 0:12:47.200 mishmash of like things from various religions and various different 0:12:47.280 --> 0:12:50.559 sort of like spiritual movements up until the nineteen thirties. 0:12:51.080 --> 0:12:53.560 So it starts with just like admitting you have a problem, 0:12:53.679 --> 0:12:55.959 and then it starts with like admitting that you are 0:12:56.000 --> 0:12:58.079 not going to be the one to solve that problem, 0:12:59.200 --> 0:13:00.960 and then it sort of goes into I'm not gonna 0:13:01.000 --> 0:13:03.079 go into the whole details about it. Probably I shouldn't 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:04.840 have even said I was in AA, because like that's 0:13:04.880 --> 0:13:05.319 part of it. 0:13:05.360 --> 0:13:07.360 But well, you're allowed to say you're in it. 0:13:07.640 --> 0:13:08.880 I'm allowed to say him in it. 0:13:09.480 --> 0:13:11.200 Yeah, no, I am, But like you know, I just 0:13:11.640 --> 0:13:13.680 I think part of it is that, like I'd never 0:13:13.679 --> 0:13:17.240 want to be a spokesperson for something that like, uh, 0:13:17.280 --> 0:13:19.200 well I view you right. 0:13:19.080 --> 0:13:21.200 Now as being a spokesperson for yourself. 0:13:21.280 --> 0:13:23.000 Yeah, I am, And AA works for me. It has 0:13:23.040 --> 0:13:25.400 been the best thing ever for me. It's awesome. Yeah, 0:13:25.679 --> 0:13:27.360 it's I've met some people who it doesn't work for 0:13:27.520 --> 0:13:29.600 and they have great sobriety and have been able to 0:13:29.600 --> 0:13:30.280 find perfect lights. 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:32.120 But for me, it's been like the best thing that's 0:13:32.120 --> 0:13:32.600 ever happened. 0:13:32.600 --> 0:13:36.360 I mean, that's really awesome. Yeah, so great. And I 0:13:36.200 --> 0:13:38.200 I noticed you got a homie here. Who's Who's Who's 0:13:38.240 --> 0:13:38.520 this good? 0:13:38.640 --> 0:13:40.600 This is my buddy, Caleb Seneca. What's up? 0:13:41.240 --> 0:13:43.480 Very nice Caleb. How do you guys know each other? 0:13:43.840 --> 0:13:50.240 Me and Caleb met on a modeling set three years ago. Yeah, okay, 0:13:50.920 --> 0:13:53.320 and we fell off for two of those years, and 0:13:53.320 --> 0:13:55.400 then we reconnected when we moved back into the city, 0:13:55.440 --> 0:13:57.720 and uh we've been locked in ever since. 0:13:57.800 --> 0:13:59.880 You're still a model uh here and there. 0:14:00.360 --> 0:14:02.839 It's like my it's like a it's like a thing 0:14:02.840 --> 0:14:04.320 I keep on the back burner always. 0:14:04.440 --> 0:14:05.319 I enjoy the. 0:14:05.320 --> 0:14:07.800 Job, it doesn't add too much stress to my life. 0:14:07.880 --> 0:14:11.040 I'm apparently can still do it, so I enjoy it. 0:14:11.080 --> 0:14:13.600 But that's not like my main thing I enjoy. 0:14:13.840 --> 0:14:17.160 So you said that, like, yeah, that life is very 0:14:17.240 --> 0:14:20.240 stable now in a way that it didn't used to be. 0:14:20.400 --> 0:14:23.600 How are you enjoying that stability compared to what I 0:14:23.640 --> 0:14:25.800 assume used to be a more chaotic way of living. 0:14:26.040 --> 0:14:28.240 So, if I think of my life's sort of goal 0:14:28.320 --> 0:14:31.080 and purpose to be as helpful as possible to other people, 0:14:32.680 --> 0:14:34.640 when my life is stable, there's a lot less I 0:14:34.680 --> 0:14:37.400 need to focus on. Like I'm not like constantly in 0:14:37.480 --> 0:14:41.160 like in like need to fix everything mode with myself. 0:14:41.600 --> 0:14:43.680 I need to just kind of like you know, like 0:14:43.840 --> 0:14:48.200 uh let things, you know, I can like let things 0:14:48.240 --> 0:14:51.040 sort of like work on their own in my own life, 0:14:51.080 --> 0:14:53.360 and that allows me to like be of service to 0:14:53.400 --> 0:14:56.080 other people in the best way possible. Like, you know, 0:14:56.280 --> 0:14:58.280 like being able to show up for other people is 0:14:58.360 --> 0:15:00.840 like one of the first steps like making me feel whole. 0:15:02.120 --> 0:15:03.760 In what ways do you try to show up for 0:15:03.800 --> 0:15:04.320 other people? 0:15:04.880 --> 0:15:09.000 I mean, I think so like my job obviously is 0:15:09.040 --> 0:15:12.200 some level of showing up for other people, but that 0:15:12.280 --> 0:15:15.120 also I'm paid for it, so that doesn't feel necessarily 0:15:15.280 --> 0:15:18.600 like the same thing. But I think something as simple 0:15:18.640 --> 0:15:22.400 as like, uh, I like so I in the yo 0:15:22.480 --> 0:15:27.400 yoing community recently, I decided it'd be cool if I 0:15:27.520 --> 0:15:31.040 like helped yooers pick out their outfits for when they 0:15:31.080 --> 0:15:32.880 go on stage, like if there's like a big like 0:15:32.920 --> 0:15:36.480 competitive aspect to it, and like that's been a really 0:15:36.480 --> 0:15:38.920 cool process and it's a sort of like a dumb thing. 0:15:39.000 --> 0:15:42.880 It's like it's objectively ridiculously silly, but it is fun 0:15:42.920 --> 0:15:46.320 to like help people like, uh, you know, like look 0:15:46.360 --> 0:15:49.320 the best they can and like feel really good in themselves. 0:15:49.360 --> 0:15:51.640 So that's like been like a most recent example, but 0:15:51.720 --> 0:15:55.200 also just like very simple things like you know, like 0:15:55.960 --> 0:15:58.800 being able to be of counsel to my friends as one. 0:15:58.960 --> 0:15:59.840 But also just like. 0:16:02.400 --> 0:16:04.320 I think there's a lot of small things that I 0:16:04.400 --> 0:16:09.240 try to do, whether it's just like being there to 0:16:09.320 --> 0:16:11.920 be just like a sounding board for my friends, or 0:16:12.960 --> 0:16:15.200 being someone as simple as like if I'm able to 0:16:15.240 --> 0:16:18.400 do something that my friend maybe can't do or is 0:16:18.400 --> 0:16:20.800 in a position where like he just like physically can't 0:16:20.800 --> 0:16:22.800 do except but work. Like recently, I'm in an apartment 0:16:22.880 --> 0:16:25.280 hunt right now, so being able to, like, you know, 0:16:25.320 --> 0:16:27.280 I have some free time during the day, so being 0:16:27.280 --> 0:16:29.440 able to like go on those tours and like try 0:16:29.440 --> 0:16:31.840 to be of service in that way, you know, it 0:16:31.920 --> 0:16:35.520 sort of like comes up as super case by case. Yeah, dude, 0:16:35.800 --> 0:16:37.480 it's been a really nice talking to you, really nice 0:16:37.480 --> 0:16:39.720 talking to you. It is your name again, Archie. 0:16:39.400 --> 0:16:41.680 Archie, Archie. You've You've inspired me today. 0:16:41.840 --> 0:16:42.680 Thank you very much. 0:16:42.720 --> 0:16:46.400 I appreciate I'm inspired by the positive outlook you have 0:16:46.480 --> 0:16:49.360 on on on life and on yourself. And uh, I'm 0:16:49.400 --> 0:16:51.520 gonna try to take that with me beyond this conversation. 0:16:51.640 --> 0:16:54.120 I appreciate it. Man, Thank you very much for anything else. 0:16:54.120 --> 0:16:55.160 Do you want to say to the people of the 0:16:55.160 --> 0:16:56.200 computer before we go? 0:16:57.160 --> 0:17:02.040 Let's see, Uh, you know, like today's beautiful day, every 0:17:02.160 --> 0:17:04.320 day live, one day at a time. I don't know, 0:17:04.480 --> 0:17:05.800 like that's the best way to do it live, one 0:17:05.880 --> 0:17:08.240 day at a time. I appreciate it. Man, Thank you 0:17:08.280 --> 0:17:08.680 so much. 0:17:08.760 --> 0:17:09.720 Chie'll see you around the universe. 0:17:09.800 --> 0:17:11.520 I see around the universe, dude, Thank you. 0:17:13.240 --> 0:17:17.400 Bye, Acchie. That was a good conversation. I enjoyed. Uh. 0:17:18.080 --> 0:17:19.560 I enjoyed talking to him. I don't know if we're 0:17:19.560 --> 0:17:22.399 trying to think if I have any post interview thoughts, 0:17:22.480 --> 0:17:26.800 but uh, yeah, I was inspired by his message. I 0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:30.400 love a good life transformation. I love a good before 0:17:30.440 --> 0:17:35.959 and after, and I love that he's you know, keeping 0:17:35.960 --> 0:17:40.399 on keeping on. Oh Hey, what's your name, man, James, James. 0:17:40.520 --> 0:17:42.640 Nice to meet you. What's up? James? Has life going? 0:17:42.760 --> 0:17:45.480 It's going well? Actually, yeah, tell me? Why tell me more. 0:17:45.800 --> 0:17:47.280 I went out last night in Brooklyn. 0:17:47.320 --> 0:17:47.800 It was fine. 0:17:48.119 --> 0:17:52.879 Yeah, what did you get? Totally totally wasting. I was 0:17:52.960 --> 0:17:54.520 having a good time, okay around. 0:17:54.680 --> 0:17:58.680 Yeah, we're filming a video for this dude's music. 0:17:59.000 --> 0:18:00.960 Wait you're oh, you're filming a video for which guy? 0:18:02.160 --> 0:18:02.760 This is Jack? 0:18:02.840 --> 0:18:03.040 Yeah? 0:18:03.080 --> 0:18:03.240 Oh? 0:18:03.280 --> 0:18:03.880 This guy? 0:18:04.040 --> 0:18:04.159 Oh? 0:18:04.200 --> 0:18:05.440 What kind of music does he make? 0:18:06.119 --> 0:18:06.399 Pop? 0:18:06.480 --> 0:18:09.399 And you want to tell you want to talk about 0:18:09.440 --> 0:18:14.720 your music? You said, think justin Timberlake and Perell. Okay, 0:18:15.520 --> 0:18:20.080 what and so how do you know this guy through him? Okay, 0:18:20.240 --> 0:18:21.120 my favorite. Just hold the mic. 0:18:21.520 --> 0:18:22.760 He's my childhood best friend. 0:18:22.840 --> 0:18:23.480 Oh okay. 0:18:23.640 --> 0:18:25.879 These are his friends from college. And I know was 0:18:25.920 --> 0:18:27.920 this in the city and he was like, Yo, you're 0:18:27.960 --> 0:18:29.560 in the city. Come come till we're gonna. 0:18:29.359 --> 0:18:30.040 See this music video. 0:18:30.119 --> 0:18:31.159 So what's the video about. 0:18:31.480 --> 0:18:33.640 It's gonna be for his song. It's gonna be promoting 0:18:33.640 --> 0:18:34.080 for a song. 0:18:34.200 --> 0:18:37.760 Oh okay, okay, Jack, do you want to come talk? Yeah, 0:18:37.920 --> 0:18:39.320 have a have a talk. Come, I have a seat, 0:18:39.359 --> 0:18:41.199 we'll have the we'll have the We'll love the man himself. 0:18:41.240 --> 0:18:41.400 Talk. 0:18:41.600 --> 0:18:42.440 Nice to meet you, sir. 0:18:43.200 --> 0:18:43.320 Yo. 0:18:43.400 --> 0:18:43.720 What's up? 0:18:43.760 --> 0:18:43.879 Man? 0:18:43.880 --> 0:18:44.480 What's your name? 0:18:46.880 --> 0:18:47.639 My name is Jack? 0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:48.119 Jack. 0:18:48.280 --> 0:18:50.320 Nice to meet Oh Jack, youman favorite? Just hold the mic. 0:18:50.320 --> 0:18:52.480 Out of there we go. What's up? Jack has life? 0:18:53.320 --> 0:18:55.040 So you got a whole, You got a whole You're 0:18:55.080 --> 0:18:56.280 you got a whole entourage. 0:18:56.280 --> 0:18:58.399 Man, we gotta we kind of put it team together. 0:18:58.800 --> 0:19:01.680 Yeah what so who's who all is in the team? 0:19:01.800 --> 0:19:02.679 Who are these guys? 0:19:03.000 --> 0:19:03.520 Uh? 0:19:03.720 --> 0:19:07.159 You know, I'll make music. He makes it with me 0:19:07.359 --> 0:19:10.240 as Zan Jake. So I like social media kind of 0:19:10.280 --> 0:19:14.000 head guy Rocco's photography and co director. 0:19:14.280 --> 0:19:16.399 You got a social media guy, You got a you 0:19:16.440 --> 0:19:17.800 got a Roco on the team. 0:19:17.920 --> 0:19:20.120 Yeah, it's on me a long time to find somebody 0:19:20.160 --> 0:19:20.640 named Roco. 0:19:20.680 --> 0:19:23.200 But how did you build this whole entourage? 0:19:24.080 --> 0:19:26.320 Fell together? Okay, I guess I don't know. 0:19:26.480 --> 0:19:28.200 And how long have you been making music? 0:19:28.240 --> 0:19:28.320 For? 0:19:29.320 --> 0:19:32.040 As long as I can remember? Probably started it around 0:19:32.040 --> 0:19:32.879 like twelve thirteen. 0:19:33.119 --> 0:19:36.439 Very nice, very nice? And how's how's the lifestyle? 0:19:37.240 --> 0:19:39.399 I'm exhausted. I live in Philly and I commute to 0:19:39.400 --> 0:19:40.160 New York every day. 0:19:40.320 --> 0:19:42.680 Oh really, wait, why do you commute to New York 0:19:42.720 --> 0:19:43.120 every day? 0:19:43.160 --> 0:19:43.560 I worked? 0:19:43.800 --> 0:19:46.000 I worked the studio job for a long time. Okay, 0:19:46.160 --> 0:19:48.080 got a second job. I teach music in Brooklyn. 0:19:48.119 --> 0:19:49.160 Now, oh so nice. 0:19:49.200 --> 0:19:52.320 So now I'm moving up here in about eight days. 0:19:52.560 --> 0:19:53.440 Philly is a great city. 0:19:53.440 --> 0:19:53.560 Man. 0:19:53.560 --> 0:19:55.080 He used to live in Philly. You used to live 0:19:55.080 --> 0:19:57.200 in Philly, Philly. I used to live in North Philly. 0:19:57.200 --> 0:19:59.320 I went to college at Temple University. 0:19:59.400 --> 0:20:01.200 Oh damn. We went to Drexel. 0:20:01.280 --> 0:20:03.960 Yeah, oh you went to Drexel. Okay, so you're in 0:20:04.000 --> 0:20:08.240 there more than Debt, dude. Drexel is so expensive. It's 0:20:08.280 --> 0:20:10.000 more expensive than like the IVY leagues. 0:20:10.160 --> 0:20:12.800 It's crazy. And my program director is still talking about 0:20:12.800 --> 0:20:13.679 budget cuts to me. 0:20:13.760 --> 0:20:16.080 But so what is this video about today? 0:20:16.800 --> 0:20:19.240 Colors, bright colors, outside. 0:20:20.480 --> 0:20:20.640 Fun? 0:20:21.119 --> 0:20:22.639 What what inspires your music? 0:20:24.440 --> 0:20:27.440 I just like dancing, and I feel like people don't 0:20:27.440 --> 0:20:29.040 play the kind of music that I like dancing to. 0:20:29.960 --> 0:20:32.000 And it feels like we kind of used to have 0:20:32.119 --> 0:20:35.719 a different vibe going on. A lot of people are 0:20:35.720 --> 0:20:37.440 trying to bring back what's going on with like you know, 0:20:37.480 --> 0:20:41.160 early two thousands hip hop R and B Phurrel Neptune's 0:20:41.200 --> 0:20:42.760 kind of production, and that's the same thing we're doing. 0:20:43.000 --> 0:20:45.080 Okay, So you're trying to make So you're making the 0:20:45.160 --> 0:20:47.600 kind of music that I danced to at my bar 0:20:47.680 --> 0:20:48.800 mitzvah kind of a thing. 0:20:48.720 --> 0:20:50.080 That you know what, I'm gonna go with that? 0:20:50.840 --> 0:20:53.560 I like, well, no, you know what I mean, Like 0:20:53.720 --> 0:20:57.440 like like I got a feeling like you're doing that. 0:20:57.480 --> 0:21:03.200 I don't know less will I am or uh usher 0:21:03.760 --> 0:21:06.800 all right, justin Timberlake, Okay, I don't know something like that. 0:21:07.119 --> 0:21:09.480 So why why were you commuting for so long instead 0:21:09.480 --> 0:21:09.960 of just moving? 0:21:10.840 --> 0:21:10.959 Uh? 0:21:11.080 --> 0:21:14.359 Because my rent was about to triple just for moving here. 0:21:14.640 --> 0:21:16.920 Yeah, unfortunately, but you got all these guys. You're not 0:21:17.000 --> 0:21:17.720 living with these guys. 0:21:17.840 --> 0:21:21.520 Oh, they're they're all aside from the Rocco unit, they're 0:21:21.520 --> 0:21:23.879 all from Philly, so that we're moving. They all came 0:21:23.960 --> 0:21:24.800 up on the train this morning. 0:21:24.840 --> 0:21:26.720 Couldn't you guys all? I feel like, can't you guys 0:21:26.760 --> 0:21:29.640 all just get one like giant ass place and each 0:21:29.760 --> 0:21:32.120 pay like seven hundred or something. 0:21:32.359 --> 0:21:34.040 You know, I'm trying to work them into it. They 0:21:34.119 --> 0:21:35.680 keep trying to tellbody they want to finish their degree. 0:21:35.760 --> 0:21:38.280 But man, are you guys? You guys should drop out 0:21:38.800 --> 0:21:39.840 dream you're only young ones. 0:21:40.000 --> 0:21:42.080 I'm trying to say, yeah, he graduated though, so I 0:21:42.119 --> 0:21:45.639 can't talk okay, And are you the only What are 0:21:45.680 --> 0:21:46.800 your contemporaries doing? 0:21:46.840 --> 0:21:47.920 What are your what are you peers doing? 0:21:48.119 --> 0:21:49.000 What are my peers doing? 0:21:49.119 --> 0:21:49.320 Yeah? 0:21:51.640 --> 0:21:53.640 I got a roommate that works at Lockheed Martin full time. 0:21:53.720 --> 0:21:56.639 Now, okay, so you gotta make a living somehow. 0:21:56.640 --> 0:21:58.679 I don't know he's making he's making a living off 0:21:58.720 --> 0:21:59.119 the bombs. 0:21:59.359 --> 0:22:01.800 Very nice? Has a how's your love life going? 0:22:02.160 --> 0:22:06.000 Oh, I'm I'm a flying solo. I guess I don't know. 0:22:06.440 --> 0:22:06.680 Have you? 0:22:06.880 --> 0:22:08.720 I feel like just but just like, I don't know. 0:22:08.760 --> 0:22:10.280 You're like a cool rapper guy? 0:22:10.440 --> 0:22:10.680 Do you not? 0:22:10.880 --> 0:22:14.400 Does everyone not like is are there not a line 0:22:14.440 --> 0:22:15.359 of people in love with you? 0:22:15.800 --> 0:22:18.240 I would I would think going to a bar and saying, hey, 0:22:18.520 --> 0:22:21.080 i'm a i'm a I'm ake I make beats, I 0:22:21.200 --> 0:22:25.040 make music might not exactly be my my best my 0:22:25.119 --> 0:22:29.320 best line being honest. Perhaps I've I've been told I've 0:22:29.359 --> 0:22:33.359 been giving negative reviews. Wait tell me, have you have 0:22:33.480 --> 0:22:35.000 you tried that? Have you been at have you been 0:22:35.040 --> 0:22:37.200 at a bar? And you're like, oh, I make music. No, 0:22:37.359 --> 0:22:41.600 It's more often, like I don't know, It's more often 0:22:41.680 --> 0:22:43.160 somebody will kind of drag me into something. 0:22:43.320 --> 0:22:44.760 It's like, oh, dude, do I talk to him? He 0:22:44.840 --> 0:22:45.280 makes music? 0:22:45.800 --> 0:22:47.239 Should have a ball I have to pick up now? 0:22:47.359 --> 0:22:47.560 Sure? 0:22:47.680 --> 0:22:50.040 Sure, sure, But that's but that's the best of both worlds, 0:22:50.160 --> 0:22:51.679 right because you get to brag, but you also get 0:22:51.680 --> 0:22:52.160 to be humble. 0:22:55.800 --> 0:22:57.800 Is it bragging if it's like my third and fourth job? 0:22:59.440 --> 0:22:59.879 I think so? 0:23:00.000 --> 0:23:02.640 Oh yeah, I think so. I think that the fact 0:23:02.720 --> 0:23:07.520 that you are doing something is inherently in and of 0:23:07.600 --> 0:23:10.840 itself worth worth value. I appreciate that depending on whether 0:23:10.920 --> 0:23:13.920 I mean not not necessarily dependent on whether or not 0:23:14.040 --> 0:23:15.159 you make money off of it. 0:23:15.320 --> 0:23:17.520 Fair I appreciate that. Yeah, I agree, Yeah, don't know. 0:23:17.920 --> 0:23:20.080 I'm not making money off YouTube for Spotify, I'll tell 0:23:20.080 --> 0:23:22.080 you that. So are you all for the love of 0:23:22.119 --> 0:23:22.680 it at this point? 0:23:22.840 --> 0:23:25.720 Are you going to miss Philadelphia? 0:23:26.160 --> 0:23:29.560 Oh my god? Yeah, it's so much fun it is. 0:23:29.880 --> 0:23:32.320 I grew up in Houston, so like, I've been in 0:23:32.400 --> 0:23:36.520 the Northeast for like five years, and yeah, Philadelphia's got 0:23:36.520 --> 0:23:38.879 so much character. I'm gonna miss it a lot. I 0:23:40.880 --> 0:23:42.520 you know, beer tastes different in Philly. 0:23:42.800 --> 0:23:45.040 I think, yeah, they got the city wise, they don't 0:23:45.040 --> 0:23:45.840 really have a citywise. 0:23:45.960 --> 0:23:46.720 Yeah, that's my thing. 0:23:46.920 --> 0:23:50.760 The citywide is the beer. No, it's it's the shot 0:23:50.840 --> 0:23:53.320 and then the beer. Yeah special. Yeah, and they'll do 0:23:53.760 --> 0:23:56.320 I don't know, little themes to it. So look Corona 0:23:56.400 --> 0:23:57.200 tequila whatever. 0:23:57.440 --> 0:23:58.399 Yeah, yeah, I don't know. 0:23:58.880 --> 0:23:59.480 Oh, it's fun. 0:23:59.520 --> 0:23:59.879 I like it. 0:24:00.200 --> 0:24:01.359 What's what's next for you? 0:24:01.520 --> 0:24:01.680 Man? 0:24:01.760 --> 0:24:04.080 After your after after this music video? 0:24:04.400 --> 0:24:07.120 Uh, I gotta get back home because I gotta move. 0:24:07.480 --> 0:24:09.199 I'm trying to get approved in an apartment and then 0:24:09.200 --> 0:24:10.359 I'm moving. 0:24:10.160 --> 0:24:12.800 Up your solo that because do you know anyone else here? 0:24:13.080 --> 0:24:14.960 I know a couple of people, but they all got 0:24:15.000 --> 0:24:17.320 their own arrangements and nobody wants to live where I 0:24:17.359 --> 0:24:17.720 want to live. 0:24:17.760 --> 0:24:19.080 So where do you want where you're gonna live. 0:24:19.119 --> 0:24:23.520 I'm gonna be in Brooklyn, Okay, well, Bushwick probably Bedstark, that's. 0:24:23.359 --> 0:24:28.560 Why that's that's around where I'm at bedsty Dang. Man, 0:24:28.600 --> 0:24:30.880 there's a bunch of cicadas flying by all the time. 0:24:31.040 --> 0:24:32.120 So you're looking for a roommates. 0:24:32.560 --> 0:24:35.000 Oh, I already live in a place. But if not, 0:24:35.320 --> 0:24:37.800 you know you're supposed to come. I'll come over. We 0:24:37.880 --> 0:24:40.040 can share a fridge, Okay. I can have some of 0:24:40.080 --> 0:24:41.960 the food that you put in your fridge sometimes and 0:24:42.000 --> 0:24:44.520 then you can have my You have some of the food. 0:24:44.800 --> 0:24:48.800 I have some saracha sauce. That's all. It's in my fridge. Man, 0:24:48.880 --> 0:24:52.119 my fridge is if you look, two beers and a fridge. No, 0:24:52.400 --> 0:24:55.679 not too, it's two beers and a uh and sacha. 0:24:55.920 --> 0:25:02.399 So yeah, this guy just laughed a lot. Oh thanks 0:25:02.680 --> 0:25:04.280 that guy. You know that guy is over there. 0:25:05.000 --> 0:25:05.800 You got big fans. 0:25:05.960 --> 0:25:07.560 Well, what's your name again? 0:25:07.720 --> 0:25:07.960 Jack? 0:25:08.280 --> 0:25:08.520 Jack? 0:25:09.240 --> 0:25:09.600 Jack? What? 0:25:09.800 --> 0:25:10.280 Uh uh? 0:25:12.480 --> 0:25:12.680 Jack? 0:25:12.960 --> 0:25:15.359 Give me something for the universe, man, Something for the universe. 0:25:15.440 --> 0:25:17.560 Mean something for the universe. You're an artist. You make music. 0:25:17.680 --> 0:25:19.080 Give us some hope, give us something. 0:25:18.960 --> 0:25:25.920 For the universe. For the universe, it's crazy where the 0:25:25.960 --> 0:25:26.639 Epstein files? 0:25:28.600 --> 0:25:28.800 Jack? 0:25:30.400 --> 0:25:30.959 Is that your name? 0:25:31.040 --> 0:25:31.159 Right? 0:25:31.720 --> 0:25:35.840 Sorry, I'm horrible names. My brain well, my brain is melting. 0:25:35.920 --> 0:25:38.159 But Jack, very nice to meet you. I'll see you 0:25:38.160 --> 0:25:42.000 around the universe. And good luck, brother, I'll be checking 0:25:42.040 --> 0:25:43.680 out you. You can plug yourself if you want. 0:25:44.000 --> 0:25:47.240 My name is Jack Iris. I'll make music. I'm from Texas. 0:25:47.920 --> 0:25:51.440 Uh if you like, you don't have to call about 0:25:51.520 --> 0:25:54.480 usher and for h listen to me. Cool. 0:25:54.520 --> 0:25:56.639 That's it, beautiful. Nice to meet you, man, see you 0:25:56.640 --> 0:26:02.400 around the universe later on letter on good luck. I'll 0:26:02.400 --> 0:26:06.640 see you guys of course. Bye, guys here, have a seat. 0:26:06.640 --> 0:26:13.040 What's your name? Man, My name is Jason. Jason. What's up, Jason? Okay, Jason. 0:26:13.080 --> 0:26:16.159 Before you sat down, you said I got a lot 0:26:16.240 --> 0:26:17.639 to say. I have a lot of resentments. 0:26:18.560 --> 0:26:20.200 Now I just feel like anything you ask me, I 0:26:20.280 --> 0:26:21.040 gotta answer for. 0:26:21.720 --> 0:26:23.800 You don't have to do anything. This is a public park. 0:26:24.320 --> 0:26:27.800 Oh you ask me anything, I gotta answer. 0:26:27.960 --> 0:26:29.879 Okay, what do you have resentments for? 0:26:29.960 --> 0:26:30.000 It? 0:26:30.040 --> 0:26:31.160 You mentioned having resentments? 0:26:31.440 --> 0:26:34.400 Do I have resentments? Yeah? I think they left. They left. 0:26:34.400 --> 0:26:36.560 I'm alright, I'm alright. Sometimes they come and they go, 0:26:36.800 --> 0:26:36.960 you know. 0:26:37.400 --> 0:26:40.760 Yeah, I'm just like over here wandering around west for 0:26:42.640 --> 0:26:44.720 not much going on, riding my bike everywhere. 0:26:44.920 --> 0:26:48.480 Yeah what so the resentments they come and they go 0:26:49.280 --> 0:26:50.720 yeah yeah yeah, it's like a cycle. 0:26:50.880 --> 0:26:53.800 Yeah no, I'm matter of fact, shout out to the 0:26:53.880 --> 0:26:57.800 family court. What is family court is where they decide 0:26:57.880 --> 0:26:58.879 you can see your kid or not? 0:26:59.400 --> 0:26:59.840 Okay? 0:27:00.160 --> 0:27:03.480 Yeah yeah, and they like always pick the woman. It's 0:27:03.560 --> 0:27:04.800 like really unfair over there? 0:27:05.080 --> 0:27:06.639 Is that what you don't have to talk about if 0:27:06.640 --> 0:27:07.399 you don't want it, you know I. 0:27:07.400 --> 0:27:10.359 Could talk about it. Yeah yeah, I'm like dealing with that. 0:27:11.119 --> 0:27:16.000 They got me on child support and then the girl 0:27:16.200 --> 0:27:20.120 she wants they garnished in my check right, oh yeah 0:27:20.240 --> 0:27:22.760 for child support, and then she don't want to let 0:27:22.800 --> 0:27:26.800 me see the kid. But she's okay with taking the money, 0:27:27.400 --> 0:27:28.520 but she don't want to let me see the. 0:27:28.520 --> 0:27:30.560 Kid if they garnished your wages. But you can't see 0:27:30.600 --> 0:27:31.040 the kid. 0:27:31.359 --> 0:27:32.960 Like they let me see him. But she's trying to 0:27:33.000 --> 0:27:35.480 take my rights away. And she made like false allegations. 0:27:35.520 --> 0:27:38.719 She says, I'm crazy, where where's the kid is here? 0:27:38.760 --> 0:27:40.200 And he's over here and they. 0:27:40.200 --> 0:27:43.120 Moved to Staten Island out of all man all borrows. 0:27:43.160 --> 0:27:45.520 I'm sorry to hear that. Man, Yeah, it's just one kid. 0:27:45.760 --> 0:27:48.000 Yeah, yeah, she said, I'm crazy, But how old is 0:27:48.080 --> 0:27:51.320 the child? He's eight? He's eight, So I'm crazy to 0:27:51.400 --> 0:27:54.680 see my kid, but not to send eight hundred dollars 0:27:54.680 --> 0:27:55.000 a month? 0:27:55.080 --> 0:27:55.240 You know? 0:27:55.359 --> 0:27:55.520 Well? 0:27:55.760 --> 0:27:58.560 How you even? I mean, you know again, we can 0:27:58.600 --> 0:27:59.600 talk about it if you want. 0:27:59.520 --> 0:28:01.080 Your how you're not gonna talk about anything? 0:28:01.160 --> 0:28:01.320 Yeah? 0:28:01.720 --> 0:28:02.919 What have you been like holding up? 0:28:03.040 --> 0:28:03.080 What? 0:28:03.280 --> 0:28:04.040 I've been acting a. 0:28:04.040 --> 0:28:08.720 Little Kanye Kanye, Like, I've been storming the courts. They're 0:28:08.760 --> 0:28:11.200 telling me lawyer is like fifteen thousand dollars. I'm not 0:28:11.240 --> 0:28:13.560 paying a lawyer. I'm like, how can somebody change the results? 0:28:13.680 --> 0:28:15.119 Is that what acting Kanye is? 0:28:15.760 --> 0:28:15.879 Oh? 0:28:15.960 --> 0:28:18.879 No, I've been like storming them. I've been like harassing 0:28:18.920 --> 0:28:22.399 the courts, like speaking my truth, Like. 0:28:22.760 --> 0:28:25.520 This interview is not this isn't gonna be bad for you, 0:28:25.720 --> 0:28:25.879 is it? 0:28:26.000 --> 0:28:26.040 No? 0:28:26.200 --> 0:28:26.240 No? 0:28:26.400 --> 0:28:29.399 No, no, no, okay? You know calling the cops on 0:28:29.520 --> 0:28:32.040 the cops? How do you call the cops on the cops? 0:28:32.280 --> 0:28:34.600 Like when the cops ain't behaving, I call other cops 0:28:34.720 --> 0:28:38.200 just try to correct them. And like then I go 0:28:38.320 --> 0:28:40.960 over there every day as soon as they open, and 0:28:41.120 --> 0:28:43.520 every conversation I have, I make sure they know this. 0:28:43.800 --> 0:28:47.040 This is serious. Yeah, but I don't know you asked me, bro, 0:28:47.160 --> 0:28:47.520 I'm just. 0:28:47.880 --> 0:28:48.960 What do you been like? 0:28:49.080 --> 0:28:50.960 I mean it's a difficult situation. 0:28:51.800 --> 0:28:52.480 Yeah yeah, but. 0:28:52.640 --> 0:28:55.200 I'm good though, because I used to be like a 0:28:55.280 --> 0:28:55.840 drug addict. 0:28:56.000 --> 0:28:58.600 Okay, what do you are? You off of drugs now? 0:28:58.680 --> 0:28:58.840 Yeah? 0:28:58.880 --> 0:28:59.080 Yeah? 0:28:59.080 --> 0:29:00.520 I think I saw them other kids. 0:29:00.600 --> 0:29:02.800 Yeah yeah, there's another guy actually go to the same program. 0:29:02.920 --> 0:29:04.480 Oh you did? Yeah, okay, cool? 0:29:04.760 --> 0:29:07.600 Yeah, all right. I don't know his story. But if 0:29:07.640 --> 0:29:09.880 you end up in that program, ship was not going well? 0:29:09.960 --> 0:29:11.680 You know, Okay, are things going better. 0:29:11.560 --> 0:29:11.920 For you now? 0:29:11.960 --> 0:29:13.200 I mean way better? 0:29:13.280 --> 0:29:15.080 Like when you're not doing cocaine? Things are better? 0:29:15.200 --> 0:29:15.400 Man? 0:29:15.560 --> 0:29:15.760 Yeah? 0:29:15.880 --> 0:29:17.760 What like I mean, okay, I know it's hard. I 0:29:17.800 --> 0:29:19.560 know you're in a tough situation. But what's been Has 0:29:19.600 --> 0:29:21.440 there been things that are positive that you're looking? 0:29:21.680 --> 0:29:22.880 Everything is actually positive? 0:29:23.080 --> 0:29:23.280 Really? 0:29:23.360 --> 0:29:28.280 The only thing that's like a little inconvenience Okay, but yeah, 0:29:28.400 --> 0:29:28.880 like I used to. 0:29:29.080 --> 0:29:30.680 I don't know if you know anything about addiction and 0:29:30.720 --> 0:29:34.320 stuff like that. I mean, like you know, like the 0:29:35.480 --> 0:29:36.800 fannel epidemic. 0:29:37.040 --> 0:29:37.400 Yeah I know. 0:29:38.400 --> 0:29:41.840 Yeah, so it's like when you're addicted to that stuff 0:29:42.000 --> 0:29:43.880 is like it literally controls you. You know, of course 0:29:43.960 --> 0:29:47.880 you wake up like with these cravings and like you 0:29:48.000 --> 0:29:51.600 need to get it, you know, and now just be 0:29:51.680 --> 0:29:54.480 riding my bike everywhere because you know, my license suspended. 0:29:55.600 --> 0:29:58.120 Yeah, and Queens. I live in Queens. 0:29:58.480 --> 0:30:00.760 So how long have you been off of the fedanel 0:30:00.760 --> 0:30:01.760 for three years? 0:30:01.800 --> 0:30:02.200 Three years? 0:30:02.400 --> 0:30:02.680 Okay? 0:30:02.880 --> 0:30:03.080 Yeah? 0:30:03.240 --> 0:30:05.560 And has it have you replaced it with anything that's 0:30:05.640 --> 0:30:06.760 like like positive? 0:30:06.880 --> 0:30:09.880 So I can't like, I don't really like sit I 0:30:09.880 --> 0:30:11.680 don't watch TV because I don't know how to like 0:30:11.760 --> 0:30:14.160 sit down and like pause. Yeah, I feel so as 0:30:14.160 --> 0:30:16.720 soon as I wake up, I make like my espresso coffee, 0:30:17.040 --> 0:30:19.200 or I gotta start running, or I gotta start go 0:30:19.280 --> 0:30:24.320 to the gym. I bike everywhere, you know, and I 0:30:24.440 --> 0:30:27.400 work now, and I you know, I might. I'm able 0:30:27.440 --> 0:30:28.360 to save my money, you know. 0:30:28.640 --> 0:30:28.840 Cool. 0:30:28.880 --> 0:30:30.680 I mean I don't save I buy a bunch of shoes. 0:30:31.000 --> 0:30:31.680 You buy shoes. 0:30:31.800 --> 0:30:34.720 I buy shoes and clothes, get necessary tattoos. 0:30:34.840 --> 0:30:37.160 That's okay, you gotta listen, man. I here's like I'm 0:30:37.240 --> 0:30:40.600 I am a strong proponent of like saving money, trying 0:30:40.640 --> 0:30:43.640 to be financial independent or whatnot. But sometimes when when 0:30:43.680 --> 0:30:45.280 life text is told on you, you got to find 0:30:45.320 --> 0:30:46.920 those little things to make you happy, you know what 0:30:47.000 --> 0:30:47.239 I mean. 0:30:47.640 --> 0:30:51.160 I look at it like, hey, you can save money, 0:30:51.240 --> 0:30:53.560 but you also could be doing cocaine and risking your life, 0:30:53.880 --> 0:30:56.080 you know, like right, And when I put it like that, 0:30:56.160 --> 0:30:58.200 it's always like, you know what, Yeah, I'm about this. 0:30:58.440 --> 0:31:00.000 Yeah, sure, but this is weird. 0:31:00.240 --> 0:31:02.720 There's still always something left over, like you know, like 0:31:03.440 --> 0:31:06.400 I save a little bit, like I don't know when 0:31:06.440 --> 0:31:08.280 I want to, you know, but there's something safe, you know. 0:31:08.480 --> 0:31:10.240 I don't know if you got any questions. 0:31:09.920 --> 0:31:11.520 Man, Yeah, I got plenty of questions. 0:31:12.040 --> 0:31:14.280 I got you on Instagram. Oh you do have some 0:31:14.360 --> 0:31:16.080 funny stuff. Oh thanks man for ship that. 0:31:16.560 --> 0:31:16.760 Yeah. 0:31:17.000 --> 0:31:18.520 I come here. I come here like once a week 0:31:18.560 --> 0:31:22.200 now and every people like you know, well, I'm curious. 0:31:22.400 --> 0:31:24.840 I'm curious about a lot of things. So okay, so 0:31:24.960 --> 0:31:27.720 life is good because you feel you're sober. Yeah, do 0:31:27.760 --> 0:31:29.760 you do anything? Do you so you know, no drinking, 0:31:29.760 --> 0:31:30.760 no smoke or anything. 0:31:30.840 --> 0:31:32.840 No, No, I don't even want secondhand smoke. 0:31:33.040 --> 0:31:33.320 Okay. 0:31:33.960 --> 0:31:35.920 Like I always wanted we to be legal, and now 0:31:35.960 --> 0:31:37.880 I'm like, fucking make cancel that shit again. 0:31:39.920 --> 0:31:41.600 I'm like, I'm like, I'm not gonna lie. 0:31:41.600 --> 0:31:44.280 I became like a Karen about my sobriety because oh yeah, 0:31:45.560 --> 0:31:46.680 you know, Karen's. 0:31:46.360 --> 0:31:46.840 Is not good. 0:31:46.920 --> 0:31:49.840 But it's like sometimes that's the way I feel. It's 0:31:49.880 --> 0:31:51.960 not on purpose, it's just like serious to me. Well, 0:31:52.040 --> 0:31:52.720 let's talk about this. 0:31:52.840 --> 0:31:55.800 So the other guy, he was talking about escaping yourself, right, 0:31:55.840 --> 0:31:58.280 and you're talking about drugs or a use of escaping yourself. 0:31:58.360 --> 0:32:00.600 And I and I'm I've never been addicted the fentanyl 0:32:00.680 --> 0:32:03.960 or whatever, but I'm familiar with like doing things and 0:32:03.960 --> 0:32:06.960 in some sort of attempt to like escape yourself, right, yeah, 0:32:07.040 --> 0:32:08.680 And so did give is that what you did? You 0:32:08.720 --> 0:32:10.240 find yourself trying to escape yourself. 0:32:10.400 --> 0:32:12.120 So in the beginning, it was just like there was 0:32:12.160 --> 0:32:15.280 nothing to do, you know, you start smoking weed, drinking, 0:32:16.360 --> 0:32:18.400 and I never felt like like it was controlling me. 0:32:18.520 --> 0:32:20.760 But when the hard drugs came in, like oxy, coldon 0:32:21.440 --> 0:32:25.160 and cocaine, it got to a point where it. 0:32:25.240 --> 0:32:26.520 Was not an option no more, you know. 0:32:27.240 --> 0:32:29.800 And at the very end, I realized you kind of 0:32:29.880 --> 0:32:32.520 realize what you're doing something for when you stop doing it, 0:32:32.800 --> 0:32:34.520 you know, because you're always giving yourself what. 0:32:34.640 --> 0:32:37.920 You need, you know, like like let's say you always 0:32:37.960 --> 0:32:38.720 got a frou. 0:32:38.640 --> 0:32:40.920 I'm sorry, can you just hold the mic up right, Yeah, yeah. 0:32:40.720 --> 0:32:43.120 You realize you always got a fridze full of water 0:32:43.240 --> 0:32:45.320 and anytime you need it you just go there. Right, 0:32:45.480 --> 0:32:47.000 But let's say you don't have no water for a 0:32:47.040 --> 0:32:49.560 whole week. You realize how thirsty you are why you 0:32:49.680 --> 0:32:52.040 drink water and stuff like that. So when you like 0:32:52.440 --> 0:32:55.000 stop consuming and using, you realize like, oh shit, I 0:32:55.080 --> 0:32:58.800 am lonely. Oh shit, I kind of hate myself. Oh shit, 0:32:58.800 --> 0:33:02.040 I don't know how to be around social activities. But 0:33:02.880 --> 0:33:05.120 it's not for everybody, and everybody has to get sober, 0:33:05.200 --> 0:33:08.120 you know, you, But it's okay to like, I feel 0:33:08.160 --> 0:33:09.520 like it's good to speak about. 0:33:09.320 --> 0:33:12.520 It like me, because there's a lot that can't handle 0:33:12.600 --> 0:33:15.120 it and they just like, nah, this can't be me. 0:33:15.240 --> 0:33:17.080 I don't have to stop this, and it's just better 0:33:17.280 --> 0:33:20.640 like to just realize if you're the person that could 0:33:20.760 --> 0:33:25.040 use safely or drink safely, then to like think you're 0:33:25.120 --> 0:33:27.920 not and keep ruining your life, you know what I'm saying. 0:33:28.080 --> 0:33:29.760 So how did you learn to do? You still hate 0:33:29.800 --> 0:33:32.960 yourself some some not not really hate. 0:33:33.000 --> 0:33:36.160 Some days I have like self pity, you know, but 0:33:36.400 --> 0:33:38.640 it's not as it's not as low, you know, it's 0:33:38.680 --> 0:33:39.240 not as low. 0:33:39.920 --> 0:33:41.880 How did it get not as love? How did it improve? 0:33:42.040 --> 0:33:43.360 It's like it's like more level. 0:33:44.040 --> 0:33:46.880 It's probably a couple of hours or I probably just 0:33:46.960 --> 0:33:49.040 go for a run or I slip it out and 0:33:49.160 --> 0:33:52.960 like it changes pretty quick, not like before, like you're 0:33:52.960 --> 0:33:56.720 with withdrawing, it lasted weeks and months. You know, it's 0:33:56.800 --> 0:34:00.840 like more human itself. But yeah, yeah no, but I 0:34:00.880 --> 0:34:02.600 don't want to make this depressing. You know, I'm I'm 0:34:02.640 --> 0:34:06.400 a pretty exciting person telling me about Dominican Yeah, you know, 0:34:06.960 --> 0:34:08.760 the only thing I missed about using drugs. 0:34:09.000 --> 0:34:12.400 He used to freestyle a lot, you know, I used 0:34:12.440 --> 0:34:14.840 to you can you you haven't been able to free. 0:34:16.239 --> 0:34:20.000 I like, yo, something's missing here, man, it's not the same, 0:34:20.160 --> 0:34:22.719 you know. Yeah I used to be that guy. Just yeah, 0:34:22.719 --> 0:34:24.080 there's a lot of I know what they do that 0:34:24.160 --> 0:34:27.480 around here or Union Squah Square like that, just come 0:34:27.560 --> 0:34:29.560 to random people, like give me a topic, you know, 0:34:30.440 --> 0:34:33.440 and yeah they got the Dominican Parade tomorrow, know if 0:34:33.480 --> 0:34:33.960 you know about that? 0:34:34.640 --> 0:34:36.000 Yeah, yeah that's a big parade. 0:34:36.040 --> 0:34:37.440 So wait, so you can't you don't feel like you 0:34:37.480 --> 0:34:39.040 can freestyle as well when you're not on drugs? 0:34:39.080 --> 0:34:41.759 And I could it just it just doesn't dot fun. 0:34:41.880 --> 0:34:44.440 You know, it's just like he's just I just got 0:34:44.520 --> 0:34:47.920 my little vape. It's like it's cool, but it's not. 0:34:48.640 --> 0:34:49.800 It don't hit like cocaine. 0:34:50.040 --> 0:34:52.680 Yeah, sure, sure, No, A lot of great ideas. I 0:34:52.760 --> 0:34:55.520 think we're formed on cocaine. I mean, like ninety nine 0:34:55.560 --> 0:34:58.480 percent of that's what they're all doing. Cocaine and fucking 0:34:58.520 --> 0:35:00.560 Silicon Valley. That's how they came up with Facebook. 0:35:00.640 --> 0:35:00.799 Yeah. 0:35:00.880 --> 0:35:04.680 Yeah, And I miss being around the girls and stuff, 0:35:04.719 --> 0:35:05.960 you know, being in the night scene. 0:35:06.000 --> 0:35:06.160 You know. 0:35:06.400 --> 0:35:10.080 Sure, Now I'm like Moran. A lot of spiritual girls 0:35:10.160 --> 0:35:12.320 and stuff. They say they're spiritual. 0:35:12.360 --> 0:35:14.800 I don't know, are you see around a lot of 0:35:14.920 --> 0:35:16.760 like what are you not a girls in recovery? 0:35:16.840 --> 0:35:17.000 You know? 0:35:17.280 --> 0:35:18.759 Okay, yeah sure yeah, yeah. 0:35:18.840 --> 0:35:21.600 They don't look bad, but you kind of gotta respect 0:35:21.640 --> 0:35:26.080 the program, yeah, of course, and respect like your own sobriety. 0:35:26.160 --> 0:35:27.759 You know. It's like it kind of don't look right 0:35:27.760 --> 0:35:30.120 because I do care about my sobriety, and it's like. 0:35:33.000 --> 0:35:34.360 If you kind of use. 0:35:34.280 --> 0:35:37.239 Your your like your recovery or your sober thing, oh 0:35:37.440 --> 0:35:39.919 to get that girls. Yeah sure, it kind of looks 0:35:39.960 --> 0:35:43.319 a little a little a little hinge. Yeah what I'm saying, 0:35:43.440 --> 0:35:45.200 you got to church, and you at church and you're 0:35:45.239 --> 0:35:48.480 there for girls. You understand it's kind of disrespecting God. 0:35:48.719 --> 0:35:50.759 Yeah, yeah, I understand. But you you get a strong 0:35:50.800 --> 0:35:51.600 relationship with God. 0:35:52.520 --> 0:35:55.319 It's it's it is there. Yeah, I got a relationship, man. 0:35:55.360 --> 0:35:56.360 What's that? What's that look like? 0:35:56.840 --> 0:35:58.440 Yeah? I pray in the morning, I get on my 0:35:58.520 --> 0:36:01.520 knees every day, and I do meditation. 0:36:02.160 --> 0:36:05.120 I do a gratitude list. What was on your gratitude 0:36:05.120 --> 0:36:05.520 list today? 0:36:05.760 --> 0:36:07.120 What's on my gratitude list? 0:36:07.239 --> 0:36:07.359 Oh? 0:36:07.440 --> 0:36:08.439 Yeah, you have one today? 0:36:08.520 --> 0:36:08.680 Yeah. 0:36:09.280 --> 0:36:12.359 Yeah, I gotta do a gratitude list because I got 0:36:12.400 --> 0:36:13.720 a lot of ship to complain about. 0:36:13.840 --> 0:36:17.399 Yeah, so I gotta at least started with the things. 0:36:17.640 --> 0:36:19.120 Do you do the scratch your list every morning? 0:36:19.360 --> 0:36:19.520 Yeah? 0:36:19.600 --> 0:36:21.520 Yeah, okay, yeah, let me get let me hear this morning. 0:36:21.600 --> 0:36:24.600 You know that's pretty simple, you know. Grateful to be sober, 0:36:24.719 --> 0:36:27.239 Grateful that I have access. I spoke at a meeting 0:36:27.320 --> 0:36:30.319 this morning. Okay, like my my, you know my story. Yeah, 0:36:30.640 --> 0:36:33.600 Grateful that I'm showing up even if I don't want to, 0:36:33.960 --> 0:36:37.240 for sleep, a place to lay my head, music, coffee, 0:36:39.040 --> 0:36:40.000 my son, my bike. 0:36:41.040 --> 0:36:43.439 Oh, and these stickers I puts on the bike. 0:36:43.640 --> 0:36:47.800 Is it the one that says uh, specialized wheel on 0:36:47.880 --> 0:36:50.399 the wheel? Oh, the one that says robo Yeah yeah, 0:36:50.719 --> 0:36:52.239 Oh I like those those are cool and. 0:36:52.360 --> 0:36:53.760 I gotta I gotta TikTok. 0:36:54.440 --> 0:36:58.520 I make like dark comedy, dark comedy on sobriety, Like 0:36:58.600 --> 0:37:00.880 we just kind of make like being an addict is 0:37:00.920 --> 0:37:01.560 pretty funny. 0:37:01.640 --> 0:37:03.160 Like this ship that people do to get high. 0:37:03.239 --> 0:37:07.000 Sure, it's like fucking you buy something for three hundred 0:37:07.000 --> 0:37:09.000 dollars in that fucking six in the morning, You're like, yo, 0:37:09.040 --> 0:37:10.680 I'll give this shit for forty I don't care. 0:37:10.680 --> 0:37:11.320 Right now, can I? 0:37:11.560 --> 0:37:13.560 If only if you want to share it? But what's 0:37:13.600 --> 0:37:16.520 the funniest thing you've done to get high? Ooh da, 0:37:16.600 --> 0:37:19.800 I gotta think about it. I don't know if to 0:37:19.960 --> 0:37:22.280 get high, but to prove that I'm sober. 0:37:23.560 --> 0:37:24.279 I think about this. 0:37:24.800 --> 0:37:26.640 So I had my rehab and I had to get 0:37:27.120 --> 0:37:30.120 drug tested every week with where my you know, urine. 0:37:32.000 --> 0:37:36.360 So somebody told me you could ask somebody for the urine. 0:37:36.640 --> 0:37:36.879 Yeah. 0:37:37.320 --> 0:37:39.200 So I called my little brother. He was about like 0:37:39.280 --> 0:37:41.839 twelve years old, and I'm like, we have I'm gonna 0:37:41.840 --> 0:37:43.240 give you twenty dollars tomorrow. 0:37:43.360 --> 0:37:43.840 I need you. 0:37:44.320 --> 0:37:46.080 He's like, you need me. No, He's like, I'm like, 0:37:46.120 --> 0:37:49.960 I need your urine. And I put my brother through that. 0:37:50.080 --> 0:37:51.920 I was driving at the time, and I picked them 0:37:52.000 --> 0:37:56.080 up at like around seven in the morning. Posy, if 0:37:56.120 --> 0:37:59.160 the piss is warm, it's like more legit, you know, 0:37:59.280 --> 0:38:02.600 you just it out. So we lived in Queens in 0:38:02.680 --> 0:38:05.160 this in the rehabits. All the outpatient was over here 0:38:05.200 --> 0:38:07.480 in the city. So I literally brought him with me 0:38:07.920 --> 0:38:11.560 so the pists can stay out of warm temperature, you know. 0:38:12.280 --> 0:38:15.239 So I'm I gave I gave him a cup and 0:38:15.400 --> 0:38:16.239 I'm like, take a pic. 0:38:16.560 --> 0:38:16.880 I don't know. 0:38:16.960 --> 0:38:20.080 I find this funny. Man, like you literally just kidnap 0:38:20.160 --> 0:38:24.560 your brother for his piss, you know. And uh and 0:38:24.960 --> 0:38:26.800 he just like my little brother. He's like, this is 0:38:26.840 --> 0:38:29.600 my big brother. I look up to him, and you know, 0:38:29.719 --> 0:38:32.880 he pissed in the cup and he did everything right. 0:38:33.000 --> 0:38:34.720 Did you end up passing the tests? 0:38:35.080 --> 0:38:39.400 I passed passed, But I wasn't expecting this. I was 0:38:39.520 --> 0:38:42.759 high at the moment. Hope. It's supposedly they lower your 0:38:42.800 --> 0:38:43.480 blood pressure. 0:38:44.719 --> 0:38:47.040 And the guy while he's like taking my blood, he's like, 0:38:47.080 --> 0:38:49.000 your pressure is like I don't know, high or low, 0:38:49.080 --> 0:38:50.719 but it was what it was not supposed to be. 0:38:50.800 --> 0:38:53.799 And I'm like, I have this part of the test. 0:38:54.280 --> 0:38:56.359 How did you get the peak? Because don't they make 0:38:56.400 --> 0:38:58.279 you go into it? Like how did you get the pee? 0:38:58.520 --> 0:39:02.000 And they was too strict, they let you go to 0:39:02.080 --> 0:39:06.320 the bathroom by yourself. So I had the little the 0:39:06.400 --> 0:39:11.520 little cup and I had it. I put it inside yourself. Yeah, 0:39:11.520 --> 0:39:13.480 and then I just one, two, three, put it in 0:39:13.560 --> 0:39:15.239 the cup and I gave it to you. So I 0:39:15.400 --> 0:39:17.600 passed and the guy looked at me weird, but he 0:39:17.600 --> 0:39:19.400 didn't give me a hard time because it's like it 0:39:19.560 --> 0:39:20.360 was just blood pressure. 0:39:20.360 --> 0:39:21.960 I'm like, I drink a lot of caffeine, you know, 0:39:22.719 --> 0:39:25.359 and what else I have I done? 0:39:25.440 --> 0:39:25.640 Man? 0:39:26.520 --> 0:39:30.480 Oh, you know, I don't even think it's probably some 0:39:30.600 --> 0:39:33.600 funny stuff, but there's a lot of embarrassing things, you know. Yeah, 0:39:33.680 --> 0:39:35.840 but it's all good though. It's all good though, not 0:39:36.000 --> 0:39:40.680 like embarrassed. You know, like everybody got a story human life. 0:39:41.520 --> 0:39:43.080 I just feel like people don't talk about this. 0:39:43.520 --> 0:39:48.080 So the TikTok I have, I kind of like every 0:39:48.160 --> 0:39:49.840 sound on TikTok you can find. 0:39:49.640 --> 0:39:51.600 A way to make it your own, right, And I 0:39:51.800 --> 0:39:56.080 just like like make like I write something about like addiction, 0:39:56.239 --> 0:39:58.720 you know, like when you're trying to get in contact 0:39:58.760 --> 0:40:00.239 with the plug at six in the morning and he 0:40:00.560 --> 0:40:02.080 tells you to meet him up at his house and 0:40:02.120 --> 0:40:02.960 then when you get there, he. 0:40:02.960 --> 0:40:05.960 Don't pick up. Yep, it's not a good feeling. What 0:40:06.120 --> 0:40:07.960 else is funny? My bad? 0:40:08.040 --> 0:40:09.600 You asked me some questions, bro, I don't know about 0:40:09.880 --> 0:40:13.680 if I'm getting you both time. One time, my friend 0:40:13.760 --> 0:40:15.719 I called him at like three in the morning. He's like, 0:40:15.760 --> 0:40:18.440 I'm up. And then I get to his house to 0:40:18.520 --> 0:40:22.640 buy some stuff, and the desire to use to get 0:40:22.719 --> 0:40:25.440 high was so strong that I'm like, yo, I just 0:40:25.480 --> 0:40:26.359 got to this guy's house. 0:40:26.400 --> 0:40:27.120 He's not picking up. 0:40:27.160 --> 0:40:30.719 I'm blasting his phone, calling him on Facebook, Instagram, even 0:40:30.840 --> 0:40:33.240 my Space, man like I need to get in contact 0:40:33.239 --> 0:40:34.000 with this guy, you know. 0:40:35.080 --> 0:40:38.280 And then he doesn't answer. So I try to climb. 0:40:38.360 --> 0:40:42.880 I climb through a big gate and I try to 0:40:42.920 --> 0:40:46.960 open his window and his father comes in, like at 0:40:47.160 --> 0:40:48.839 seven in the morning. He's like what are you doing. 0:40:50.000 --> 0:40:52.080 I'm like, your son, he's not picking up the phone, 0:40:52.120 --> 0:40:54.800 but he's like what are you doing? Like how you 0:40:54.920 --> 0:40:55.560 got back here? 0:40:57.160 --> 0:40:59.160 He's like, can you please leave? You know? And I left, 0:40:59.239 --> 0:40:59.440 you know. 0:40:59.640 --> 0:41:01.879 But now that I think about that. That's a little 0:41:02.000 --> 0:41:03.840 I don't think that's normal behavior. 0:41:03.520 --> 0:41:05.879 You know, like it probably wasn't. But I think part 0:41:05.920 --> 0:41:09.399 of you know, that's part of looking back on past behavior. Yeah, 0:41:09.480 --> 0:41:12.640 that probably wasn't normal. But like when you're I think 0:41:12.640 --> 0:41:15.400 when you're in something like that, you have you have 0:41:15.520 --> 0:41:16.200 no discernment. 0:41:16.239 --> 0:41:17.760 You gotta do what you gotta do to survive. 0:41:17.840 --> 0:41:19.320 Well when you yeah, when you're in something like that, 0:41:19.520 --> 0:41:22.480 you're like, you just have no discernment. You just start 0:41:22.560 --> 0:41:25.920 going through whatever it is that your brain is fucking 0:41:25.960 --> 0:41:29.080 telling you to do. And then you mature and you go, oh, yeah, 0:41:29.080 --> 0:41:32.680 that was fucking stupid, you know, But then you that's 0:41:32.760 --> 0:41:34.960 part of life. I think, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know. 0:41:35.400 --> 0:41:38.359 And then this one is a little dark. But yeah, 0:41:38.400 --> 0:41:39.399 I'm telling you too much. 0:41:39.520 --> 0:41:41.440 Man, only if you will if you want, I mean, 0:41:41.440 --> 0:41:45.480 I'm telling you I'll disclaim I put this on the internet. Yeah, yeah, 0:41:46.520 --> 0:41:48.839 tell me if you watch, you know, if there's other things, 0:41:49.520 --> 0:41:50.040 all right. 0:41:50.080 --> 0:41:54.280 But you know, in Queens, prostitution is real big okay, 0:41:54.760 --> 0:41:58.120 And when you get cocaine, you get real horny. 0:41:58.360 --> 0:42:00.120 Sure you can talk about this like that. You you 0:42:01.000 --> 0:42:02.040 you're talking about whatever you want to. 0:42:02.280 --> 0:42:04.120 Mind you don't mind talking about like horniness and all that, 0:42:05.719 --> 0:42:06.960 but you know, people get horny, you know. 0:42:07.120 --> 0:42:09.640 Yeah, people get horned. That's part of life. Yeah, normal 0:42:10.000 --> 0:42:15.319 you can yeah we're not so when. 0:42:15.239 --> 0:42:18.680 You get horning, but you can't get hard. 0:42:18.960 --> 0:42:22.759 So it's like you have the strongest desire to do something, yeah, 0:42:22.880 --> 0:42:24.719 and then this it's gone. 0:42:25.680 --> 0:42:28.120 So they used to be this thing called like back page. 0:42:28.960 --> 0:42:34.200 Yeah, you find like escorts, and every time he showed up, 0:42:34.600 --> 0:42:37.279 it was never the girl in the picture. Sure so, 0:42:38.040 --> 0:42:39.800 and I knew it was never the girl in the picture. 0:42:40.560 --> 0:42:42.600 So I used to get a hide just by calling 0:42:42.640 --> 0:42:46.680 the number and having hope that it actually was her. Yeah, 0:42:47.360 --> 0:42:51.120 And I will call like fucking like thirty numbers in 0:42:51.200 --> 0:42:51.680 one night. 0:42:51.680 --> 0:42:54.240 And you would never meet any of the like sometimes 0:42:54.280 --> 0:42:56.520 that would me like if they keep Sometimes they're like, yeah, 0:42:56.560 --> 0:42:57.440 this is her, this is her. 0:42:57.520 --> 0:43:00.480 I'm like, this is the one with the pink hannies. 0:43:00.920 --> 0:43:03.239 They're like, yeah, it's her, it's her, and I will 0:43:03.320 --> 0:43:06.160 go over there. It was never heard, and I was like, 0:43:06.400 --> 0:43:09.160 I'm not doing this last thing. I'm gonna say this 0:43:09.320 --> 0:43:13.360 might be funny or I don't know. They supposedly like 0:43:13.440 --> 0:43:16.240 a mafia cartel with these people, you know, they traffick 0:43:16.320 --> 0:43:19.719 people and all that. And they sent me so I 0:43:19.880 --> 0:43:21.960 cancel a girl right like they brought her to me 0:43:22.840 --> 0:43:25.239 and I'm like, that's not the girl, bro. 0:43:25.800 --> 0:43:25.840 No. 0:43:26.560 --> 0:43:27.360 They got upset. 0:43:27.400 --> 0:43:29.920 They're like, you wasted our time, and they sent me 0:43:30.000 --> 0:43:34.480 pictures of people's heads cut off Jesus and like slaughter. 0:43:34.600 --> 0:43:36.400 But you could tell that the pictures were like probably 0:43:36.440 --> 0:43:38.600 in Mexico, you know, they do that type of stuff. 0:43:38.560 --> 0:43:40.400 Okay, And I was a little scared. 0:43:40.440 --> 0:43:43.200 I'm like, and they started harassing me and telling you 0:43:43.280 --> 0:43:44.160 got to pay us their money. 0:43:44.640 --> 0:43:45.080 What did you do? 0:43:45.719 --> 0:43:47.680 I basically got wasted their time? 0:43:47.920 --> 0:43:49.520 No, I mean did you pay them money? 0:43:49.920 --> 0:43:49.960 No? 0:43:50.200 --> 0:43:53.080 No, it's just like you didn't. You lied to me. 0:43:53.239 --> 0:43:55.440 You gave me a menu, and when you know I 0:43:55.480 --> 0:43:57.440 asked for a burger, you brought me a vegan burger. 0:43:57.600 --> 0:43:58.920 So how did you So you were at a point 0:43:58.960 --> 0:44:01.080 where you were like I'm done, I just come and 0:44:01.120 --> 0:44:04.000 fucking kill me. But now you want to live? Oh yeah, 0:44:04.040 --> 0:44:04.719 I want to live now? 0:44:04.800 --> 0:44:04.960 Yeah? 0:44:05.480 --> 0:44:06.200 How'd you get there? 0:44:07.880 --> 0:44:10.440 You know? It's like I don't wake up miserable every day, 0:44:10.480 --> 0:44:12.439 you know, like I actually got a lot of things 0:44:12.480 --> 0:44:13.200 to look forward to. 0:44:13.840 --> 0:44:15.759 I got a lot of shoes to wear that I 0:44:15.800 --> 0:44:17.040 haven't had time to wear. 0:44:17.680 --> 0:44:19.480 It's weird things like that, you know, like they say 0:44:19.560 --> 0:44:21.600 material things that, like it's not the most important things. 0:44:21.640 --> 0:44:23.560 But sometimes you who knows, you got a new game, 0:44:23.640 --> 0:44:25.359 you might want to play that game before you die. 0:44:25.600 --> 0:44:27.000 Yeah, yeah, things like that. 0:44:28.160 --> 0:44:30.279 And I never really wanted to die, you know, but 0:44:30.360 --> 0:44:32.120 the way I was living, when I was living like that, 0:44:33.000 --> 0:44:34.600 it could probably get you there. You know, if you 0:44:34.719 --> 0:44:38.120 like wasting your your whole life and wasting your check 0:44:38.640 --> 0:44:42.480 that quick, and like you don't have self respect for yourself. 0:44:43.200 --> 0:44:45.160 You look at yourself in the mirror, you look unhealthy 0:44:45.239 --> 0:44:47.879 and all that, that could probably get you to that point, 0:44:47.920 --> 0:44:48.080 you know. 0:44:48.320 --> 0:44:51.240 Yeah, yeah, yeah, hmm hmm. 0:44:51.840 --> 0:44:54.160 But yeah I live Uh I don't know if that 0:44:54.239 --> 0:44:56.000 helps out, but yeah, I live over there by you know, 0:44:56.120 --> 0:44:56.960 city Field. 0:44:57.040 --> 0:44:58.960 No Corona, by the met Stadium. 0:44:59.160 --> 0:45:03.759 Oh no, uh no, I don't, I don't. I'm not 0:45:03.800 --> 0:45:06.040 in a baseball guy, but I know what the metsa are. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:45:06.040 --> 0:45:08.120 I live by their stadium. Okay, yeah, yeah, by the 0:45:08.360 --> 0:45:10.880 Seven Trains. So what what are you looking forward to 0:45:11.120 --> 0:45:12.160 in life these days? 0:45:12.880 --> 0:45:18.759 Right now? Right now? I don't really know, man, like 0:45:18.920 --> 0:45:19.839 things are good right now. 0:45:19.960 --> 0:45:22.640 The thing is, you know, like I feel like a 0:45:22.680 --> 0:45:24.319 lot of stuff is a scam right now. This thing 0:45:24.440 --> 0:45:26.200 is like built for us to fail. 0:45:26.480 --> 0:45:27.360 What's what's a scam? 0:45:27.920 --> 0:45:28.080 You know? 0:45:28.160 --> 0:45:30.600 It's like one job can't even get you an apartment, 0:45:30.640 --> 0:45:33.120 you know what I'm saying. It's like all these things. 0:45:34.120 --> 0:45:38.840 Oh yeah, I don't really know what I'm looking for. 0:45:39.080 --> 0:45:41.239 But I think this generation has a lot of what 0:45:41.600 --> 0:45:43.320 I'm not saying you but a lot of us Like 0:45:43.400 --> 0:45:46.000 it's just it's kind of hard out here, you know, 0:45:46.320 --> 0:45:48.239 but I'm not I'm not like really like struggling, like 0:45:48.360 --> 0:45:51.640 I could go eat do whatever, but not like like 0:45:51.760 --> 0:45:54.480 real big goals, like real real big a cheese ones. 0:45:54.960 --> 0:45:55.160 Yeah. 0:45:55.200 --> 0:45:59.400 I think our generation is definitely like having problems, like 0:45:59.480 --> 0:46:02.239 you know whatever, having wanted to have a kid, or 0:46:02.880 --> 0:46:04.839 get married, or have a house or do all these things. 0:46:05.160 --> 0:46:07.680 This this guy, this Dominican do in Spanish, He's like 0:46:08.560 --> 0:46:10.719 he made it sound like he's like, you know, I 0:46:10.800 --> 0:46:12.840 could go to my country today, you know, and I 0:46:13.400 --> 0:46:16.120 could live for the rest of my life only if 0:46:16.160 --> 0:46:19.200 I die by tomorrow at seven seven thirty am. 0:46:20.040 --> 0:46:20.239 Yeah. 0:46:20.719 --> 0:46:22.600 So basically you can listen to the rest of his life. 0:46:22.880 --> 0:46:25.000 So it's like one of those you know, you kind 0:46:25.000 --> 0:46:26.560 of just get used to it, you know, you just 0:46:26.680 --> 0:46:29.799 kind of but things are way better, man, Like, things 0:46:29.800 --> 0:46:30.800 are way better, you know. 0:46:31.760 --> 0:46:35.400 And yeah, I'm a I don't know you deal with 0:46:35.480 --> 0:46:37.040 social media. I'm asking you a question. 0:46:37.120 --> 0:46:37.359 All right. 0:46:37.440 --> 0:46:41.000 Sure, I'm bad because I got this TikTok and I 0:46:41.120 --> 0:46:43.399 got like I managed to get like in twenty twenty 0:46:43.440 --> 0:46:46.200 two when I wasn't working in the dark comedy. Yeah, 0:46:46.360 --> 0:46:49.280 and I man to got like almost thirteen thousand followers 0:46:49.719 --> 0:46:52.320 and like one hundred and sixty six thousand likes. Okay, 0:46:53.400 --> 0:46:57.719 but like the shame or something of over like the 0:46:57.760 --> 0:47:00.120 overthinking of knowing that even. 0:47:00.040 --> 0:47:03.960 Though I'm being perceived, yeah, like your videos are being watched. 0:47:05.160 --> 0:47:06.719 And then when I saw like people that know me 0:47:06.800 --> 0:47:10.000 in real life see my videos. Like I was cool 0:47:10.040 --> 0:47:12.160 with people that I don't know, like talking about all 0:47:12.200 --> 0:47:14.359 this and see my bit. But when I saw real people, 0:47:14.400 --> 0:47:16.320 I saw like a little Yeah, I don't want you 0:47:16.400 --> 0:47:17.960 guys to see it. But I don't know how you 0:47:18.080 --> 0:47:21.120 deal with it, Like you kind of gotta be yourself, 0:47:21.200 --> 0:47:25.080 you know, how you deal with like some days like 0:47:25.160 --> 0:47:26.960 at night, you know, maybe you have too much caffeine 0:47:26.960 --> 0:47:28.440 and you overthink about like yo, what. 0:47:28.480 --> 0:47:30.360 I oh sorry, basically asking me, how do you not 0:47:30.520 --> 0:47:33.880 ever think? Yeah, yeah, about the social about social media. 0:47:33.719 --> 0:47:36.319 Like social media and the content always being out there, 0:47:36.360 --> 0:47:37.600 because like I did it. 0:47:37.920 --> 0:47:40.520 But like I mean, you put your phone down, man, 0:47:40.600 --> 0:47:43.160 you walk outside here, let me just let's let the 0:47:43.239 --> 0:47:45.880 videos spin. Yeah yeah, I mean you can't ever think it. 0:47:45.960 --> 0:47:48.040 I mean I do ever think it plenty, but like 0:47:49.880 --> 0:47:51.040 I don't know, man, I believe me. 0:47:51.360 --> 0:47:54.759 Yeah, coming from the outside is not that deep. It is, 0:47:55.000 --> 0:47:58.279 believe me. Like it's I think it's in it's in 0:47:58.360 --> 0:48:00.960 the person's head, like I see other people doing. I 0:48:01.000 --> 0:48:03.040 don't think anything bad. I'm like, this is fucking great. 0:48:03.200 --> 0:48:07.360 Well, also, like nobody cares about you. Nobody cares, nobody. 0:48:07.400 --> 0:48:11.240 It's uh, it's both. It's both. It's both a tragic 0:48:11.360 --> 0:48:14.040 fact and a beautiful fact that nobody really cares about you. 0:48:14.120 --> 0:48:16.160 And this guy was literally screaming it don't really matter. 0:48:16.280 --> 0:48:18.919 Nobody cares. Yeah right, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, nobody cares. 0:48:19.000 --> 0:48:21.480 Nobody listening to you, nobody. Everyone has their own life, 0:48:21.480 --> 0:48:24.799 everyone's doing their own things. So you know, man, what's 0:48:24.840 --> 0:48:28.279 your name again? Jason Jason, Jason, dude, thanks for I 0:48:28.360 --> 0:48:31.120 really appreciate your your vulnerability and your honesty. I appreciate 0:48:31.120 --> 0:48:33.680 you sharing your story with us here. I hope it 0:48:33.800 --> 0:48:36.759 was a positive experience for you. Yeah, and I appreciate you. 0:48:37.000 --> 0:48:38.320 Is Is there anything else you want to say to 0:48:38.360 --> 0:48:39.960 the people of the computer before we get out of here? 0:48:40.120 --> 0:48:40.319 Yeah? 0:48:40.400 --> 0:48:46.840 Yeah, right now, bro, we here were just follow my 0:48:46.960 --> 0:48:52.600 TikTok Sober Facts, Sober Facts, and in my Instagram, I'm 0:48:52.640 --> 0:48:57.520 doing content like I ride my bike like real crazy sure, 0:48:57.880 --> 0:49:00.800 like really get into traffic and all that. You know, 0:49:01.040 --> 0:49:02.880 I've still got to do crazy stuff in the extent, 0:49:02.960 --> 0:49:05.120 you know, like thissk my life and stuff. Okay, I 0:49:05.200 --> 0:49:07.279 got a little constant Yeah you always you always end 0:49:07.360 --> 0:49:09.920 up you know. There was something Yeah, yeah. 0:49:09.840 --> 0:49:11.320 I got the go pro I put it on it. 0:49:11.440 --> 0:49:14.439 Okay, yeah, yeah, Now I appreciate you brought on. Really 0:49:14.480 --> 0:49:17.719 got much to say, you know, I'm grateful. We what 0:49:18.000 --> 0:49:20.640 was this Washington, Washington Square Park? Yeah yeah, shout out 0:49:20.680 --> 0:49:24.080 to Corona Queens. You know, hopefully this video goes up, 0:49:24.520 --> 0:49:24.759 you know. 0:49:26.040 --> 0:49:29.680 Weird walking wrong reveal. Jason, Nice to meet you, man, 0:49:29.800 --> 0:49:32.680 Stay uh, stay safe, okay, don't don't don't crash your 0:49:32.719 --> 0:49:33.839 bike and kill yourself or anything. 0:49:33.880 --> 0:49:34.000 Hi. 0:49:34.040 --> 0:49:34.560 What's your name? 0:49:34.640 --> 0:49:35.759 My name is Ellen, Ellen. 0:49:35.840 --> 0:49:38.279 Nice to meet you, Lyle, to meet you. How's life going? 0:49:38.480 --> 0:49:39.200 That's going great? 0:49:39.320 --> 0:49:41.880 Wait, tell me more. That's such a h That was 0:49:41.960 --> 0:49:44.480 like an instinctively positive answer. 0:49:44.560 --> 0:49:46.839 My mom vacation with my family. We're having a great 0:49:46.880 --> 0:49:47.520 time with friends. 0:49:47.719 --> 0:49:50.800 That's so awesome. Well, how how like how long have 0:49:50.840 --> 0:49:51.600 you had a family? 0:49:53.160 --> 0:49:55.279 I have a ten year old and a twelve year 0:49:55.320 --> 0:49:57.160 old and I've been married for fourteen years. 0:49:57.480 --> 0:49:59.000 Was that any of that difficult? 0:50:00.520 --> 0:50:00.719 Yeah? 0:50:02.200 --> 0:50:02.480 Was it all? 0:50:02.640 --> 0:50:03.120 Was it worth it? 0:50:03.440 --> 0:50:03.640 Yes? 0:50:04.000 --> 0:50:04.879 Would you do it again? 0:50:05.040 --> 0:50:05.200 Yes? 0:50:05.440 --> 0:50:07.120 Do you have any advice for someone trying to like 0:50:07.239 --> 0:50:09.440 start a family or like, who's like just started a family? 0:50:09.600 --> 0:50:11.520 Communicate and she be honest. 0:50:12.280 --> 0:50:17.080 Has your like communication with your family gotten like like 0:50:17.200 --> 0:50:19.080 better over time? Yes? 0:50:19.239 --> 0:50:19.600 It has. 0:50:20.480 --> 0:50:21.920 How are they your like children? 0:50:22.040 --> 0:50:22.160 Oh? 0:50:22.200 --> 0:50:23.560 I have a question because you have like kids? 0:50:23.640 --> 0:50:23.759 Right? 0:50:23.800 --> 0:50:25.800 Your kids are like a little older, you know, Like, 0:50:26.000 --> 0:50:28.000 are you are you worried about the future or do 0:50:28.040 --> 0:50:29.279 you think everything will be all right? 0:50:29.440 --> 0:50:29.640 Yeah? 0:50:29.719 --> 0:50:30.200 I worry. 0:50:30.480 --> 0:50:31.360 What do you worry about? 0:50:31.560 --> 0:50:36.479 I worry about that there's too much access to things. 0:50:36.920 --> 0:50:37.719 Well, tell me more. 0:50:38.560 --> 0:50:41.839 With the internet, with social media. I worry about their 0:50:41.880 --> 0:50:42.439 mental health. 0:50:43.239 --> 0:50:44.800 Are you do your kids seem like they have like 0:50:44.840 --> 0:50:45.640 good mental health? 0:50:46.560 --> 0:50:49.759 Yes? But I seemed like that too, And then you know, 0:50:49.920 --> 0:50:51.000 it gets life gets hard. 0:50:51.640 --> 0:50:54.920 When you were ten, what do you remember about your 0:50:55.000 --> 0:50:56.959 life for like, when you were your kid's age. 0:50:57.719 --> 0:51:01.640 When I was ten, it was easy. 0:51:02.280 --> 0:51:02.879 Life was easy. 0:51:03.000 --> 0:51:03.560 Life was easy. 0:51:03.680 --> 0:51:05.800 Do you think life was easier for you than that 0:51:05.880 --> 0:51:06.920 it is for your kids now? 0:51:08.520 --> 0:51:08.920 I don't know. 0:51:10.120 --> 0:51:13.640 Maybe it was less complicated. 0:51:15.000 --> 0:51:17.440 What era of your life has been the least complicated? 0:51:17.719 --> 0:51:19.600 Probably my childhood does right. 0:51:19.600 --> 0:51:20.520 Now feel complicated? 0:51:21.600 --> 0:51:21.799 Oh? 0:51:22.640 --> 0:51:27.000 Yeah, you gotta work and take care of your work 0:51:27.080 --> 0:51:28.160 and take care of your family. 0:51:28.480 --> 0:51:30.640 Yeah, it's complicated, but see you seem like you're having 0:51:30.640 --> 0:51:33.439 a great time things are. Now there's my family, there's 0:51:33.440 --> 0:51:36.160 your family. Well, I'll let you go, unless if you 0:51:36.200 --> 0:51:36.919 want to keep talking. 0:51:37.040 --> 0:51:38.279 I'm just talking about life. 0:51:38.360 --> 0:51:39.319 Yeah, we're talking about life. 0:51:39.320 --> 0:51:40.439 You know, a get go about life? 0:51:40.480 --> 0:51:40.680 Yeah? 0:51:40.719 --> 0:51:41.400 Is that your husband? 0:51:41.480 --> 0:51:42.640 That's my husband and my daughter? 0:51:42.719 --> 0:51:44.440 Had you had you and your husband made at a bar? 0:51:44.719 --> 0:51:46.560 You guys have met at a bar. Don't you ever 0:51:46.560 --> 0:51:47.919 think about it? Didn't you ever think about crazy? 0:51:48.000 --> 0:51:48.040 Like? 0:51:48.080 --> 0:51:50.040 Oh if I just stayed in that night, my whole 0:51:50.080 --> 0:51:52.880 life would be different. Isn't that crazy? What did he 0:51:52.920 --> 0:51:53.799 first say to you at the bar? 0:51:54.800 --> 0:51:56.120 You're too old and too smart? 0:51:56.640 --> 0:51:57.400 He said that to you. 0:51:57.560 --> 0:52:00.560 Yeah, he only dated young girl. Oh, my son really wet. 0:52:02.880 --> 0:52:06.360 He only dated young girls. And I was getting my 0:52:06.440 --> 0:52:08.520 master's degree, So he said I was too old and 0:52:08.560 --> 0:52:09.000 too smart. 0:52:09.120 --> 0:52:10.839 He said you were too old. Were not offended when 0:52:10.880 --> 0:52:11.839 he said you were too old? 0:52:12.640 --> 0:52:15.000 No, I just showed him that I was better than 0:52:15.040 --> 0:52:15.640 all those girls. 0:52:15.760 --> 0:52:19.560 Okay, very cool? Hmm. And what was it like a 0:52:20.200 --> 0:52:21.439 Is it like in a college. 0:52:21.120 --> 0:52:23.360 Town or was it in Hermosa Beach, California? 0:52:23.400 --> 0:52:25.960 For most of Beach, California? Very nice? What was your 0:52:25.960 --> 0:52:26.880 first date after the bar? 0:52:26.960 --> 0:52:30.840 Do you remember a restaurant by in Hermosa? 0:52:31.080 --> 0:52:32.600 What made you fall in love with your husband? 0:52:32.640 --> 0:52:32.759 When? 0:52:32.800 --> 0:52:33.439 When was the moment? 0:52:33.719 --> 0:52:33.839 Oh? 0:52:34.000 --> 0:52:34.720 Oh, there's Danny. 0:52:35.360 --> 0:52:39.040 His honesty, his honesty. I guess, I guess the fact 0:52:39.080 --> 0:52:40.640 that he came up to you and immediately said you 0:52:40.760 --> 0:52:44.920 are too old is an indicator of some form of honesty. 0:52:45.239 --> 0:52:45.600 Exactly. 0:52:45.680 --> 0:52:46.840 Well, this is your whole family. 0:52:47.400 --> 0:52:49.200 No, we're we're heading to Cooper'stown. 0:52:49.440 --> 0:52:52.640 Oh the base here, Oh, you got a whole clan. 0:52:52.840 --> 0:52:54.080 I got a whole there's more. 0:52:54.239 --> 0:52:56.160 Are they troublesommer? Are they well behaved? There? 0:52:56.200 --> 0:52:58.040 Well, I'm a principle of an elementary school, so. 0:52:58.080 --> 0:52:59.840 There was the principal of elementary school. 0:53:00.320 --> 0:53:02.920 Well really, I'll mess those kids up if they mess around? 0:53:03.040 --> 0:53:04.040 Really have you? 0:53:04.239 --> 0:53:04.359 Uh? 0:53:04.960 --> 0:53:07.160 Do you do you rule with an eye and fist 0:53:07.280 --> 0:53:08.320 or do you rule with compassion? 0:53:08.440 --> 0:53:08.920 Compassion? 0:53:09.120 --> 0:53:12.680 That's nice? What's the number one? What's what's the number 0:53:12.680 --> 0:53:17.160 one issue that like kids are facing these days? From 0:53:17.239 --> 0:53:19.080 from what you observe at. 0:53:18.960 --> 0:53:22.400 The school I work at, They're they're entitled. 0:53:23.440 --> 0:53:26.520 Yeah, you think more so than like when when when 0:53:26.560 --> 0:53:27.359 you were a kid? 0:53:27.719 --> 0:53:29.400 What do your parents are? Lawnmower? 0:53:29.560 --> 0:53:31.799 Parents like to plow down all the obstacles in front 0:53:31.800 --> 0:53:34.160 of them so they don't have to deal with adversity. Interesting, 0:53:34.200 --> 0:53:36.760 and then they don't learn how to deal with struggles. 0:53:37.000 --> 0:53:37.520 Interesting. 0:53:38.560 --> 0:53:39.279 Okay, I gotta go. 0:53:39.400 --> 0:53:41.640 Okay, Well it was very what's your name? Ellen? Ellen? 0:53:41.800 --> 0:53:43.200 Very nice to meet you, and thank you very much 0:53:43.239 --> 0:53:44.600 for chatting with a Get go. You have a great 0:53:44.600 --> 0:53:48.759 life too. I'll see you around the universe. What a 0:53:48.880 --> 0:53:52.719 nice uh, what a nice guest appearance from a from 0:53:52.760 --> 0:53:55.319 an elementary school principal. That was a good interview. Hi, 0:53:55.320 --> 0:53:58.400 I'm Nicole, Nicole. Nice to meet you to meet. What's up, Nicole? 0:53:58.440 --> 0:53:59.919 How's it, how's it going? How's life? 0:54:00.080 --> 0:54:00.480 What's nice? 0:54:00.480 --> 0:54:00.920 What's happening? 0:54:01.040 --> 0:54:02.919 Life is great? Life is great. 0:54:03.040 --> 0:54:05.960 Well, I was just watching people waiting around in the 0:54:06.040 --> 0:54:07.279 fountain without shoes on. 0:54:07.600 --> 0:54:07.799 Yeah. 0:54:07.920 --> 0:54:10.759 I've seen so many people watching watching their goocha's just 0:54:10.840 --> 0:54:13.840 squatting over the you know the stream. 0:54:14.160 --> 0:54:17.160 Yeah, I get reels of that all the time. 0:54:17.280 --> 0:54:19.239 But I haven't seen this fountain in person, so I 0:54:19.400 --> 0:54:21.320 was just kind of like waiting to see if somebody 0:54:21.360 --> 0:54:24.359 would pop a squat, but so far, no luck. Only 0:54:24.400 --> 0:54:29.240 people waiting around without shoes on, which is also a choice. 0:54:30.520 --> 0:54:31.359 Do you live around here? 0:54:31.719 --> 0:54:31.920 I do? 0:54:32.320 --> 0:54:32.520 Yeah? 0:54:32.800 --> 0:54:34.000 And what do you go to school? 0:54:34.560 --> 0:54:34.759 You do? 0:54:35.160 --> 0:54:36.040 What do you go to school for? 0:54:36.160 --> 0:54:38.480 I'm a grad student in opera? 0:54:39.320 --> 0:54:41.560 You're a grad student in opera? 0:54:41.719 --> 0:54:41.919 Yeah? 0:54:42.120 --> 0:54:44.520 So are you like an opera singer? 0:54:44.800 --> 0:54:45.000 Yeah? 0:54:45.320 --> 0:54:45.560 Really? 0:54:45.800 --> 0:54:46.040 Yeah? 0:54:46.560 --> 0:54:46.840 Cool? 0:54:47.440 --> 0:54:47.680 Yeah? 0:54:47.920 --> 0:54:49.520 What you seem embarrassed about it? 0:54:49.800 --> 0:54:52.960 It's a very niche interest, extremely niche. Yeah, extremely niche. 0:54:53.040 --> 0:54:55.160 But I am a master's level. 0:54:55.719 --> 0:54:58.439 That's amazing. How your how do you keep your voice 0:54:58.480 --> 0:54:58.879 in check? 0:55:00.400 --> 0:55:00.600 You know? 0:55:01.120 --> 0:55:06.520 I try not to smoke very much. I try to 0:55:06.640 --> 0:55:10.120 do vocalese like warm ups and stuff. I try to 0:55:10.920 --> 0:55:13.359 I try to keep a regular practice schedule, but it's 0:55:13.400 --> 0:55:16.440 the summer, so things are a little bit loosey goosey. 0:55:16.840 --> 0:55:22.239 Okay, yeah, okay, yeah, Now, what's the hardest part about 0:55:22.280 --> 0:55:23.160 being an opera singer? 0:55:23.239 --> 0:55:29.759 About being an opera singer, probably h I think it 0:55:29.840 --> 0:55:32.000 really depends on what kind of opera singer you are. 0:55:32.320 --> 0:55:35.440 For me, like, I'm a soprano, and so you know, 0:55:36.000 --> 0:55:39.200 most opera singers are sopranos. But if you're a tenor, 0:55:39.520 --> 0:55:43.080 if you're a guy, you've got a lot more opportunities. 0:55:43.440 --> 0:55:46.640 So you are in a area with a lot of 0:55:46.719 --> 0:55:48.359 other opera singers, right. 0:55:48.280 --> 0:55:51.880 Which is great, Like that is the best part for me. 0:55:52.840 --> 0:55:54.560 I don't feel like ranger guys. I'm wondering if they're 0:55:54.560 --> 0:55:56.680 gonna I've never ever in my life Beten kicked out 0:55:56.680 --> 0:55:59.040 of this park, but I'm curious. Wait, they're walking past them. 0:55:59.080 --> 0:56:00.839 Have you done a lot of interview is in this park? 0:56:01.000 --> 0:56:01.200 Yeah? 0:56:01.280 --> 0:56:03.960 This is the one place. Every single other place I 0:56:04.040 --> 0:56:05.480 go to in the world to do this, I end 0:56:05.560 --> 0:56:07.600 up eventually getting kicked out, but never at this part. 0:56:07.680 --> 0:56:09.600 Well, I mean, just look around. There's a woman behind 0:56:09.680 --> 0:56:12.080 us with like two parrots sitting on her shoulder. 0:56:12.320 --> 0:56:12.480 Right. 0:56:13.360 --> 0:56:14.960 Oh, holy shit, there is a moment behind us with 0:56:14.960 --> 0:56:17.200 two bards. Yeah, okay, I gotta go talk to her 0:56:17.239 --> 0:56:19.560 after this. You got this is myself. I don't even 0:56:19.560 --> 0:56:20.120 have to record it. 0:56:21.400 --> 0:56:24.760 I was just wandering. I I wandered in like waiting 0:56:24.840 --> 0:56:27.000 to see something crazy going on. 0:56:27.360 --> 0:56:29.600 So okay, remember I was gonna ask you the opera 0:56:29.680 --> 0:56:34.359 scene Like the other people, there are opera singers cool? 0:56:34.480 --> 0:56:38.239 Or are they like theater kids? What's the demo, what's 0:56:38.280 --> 0:56:39.319 the vibe, what's the scene? 0:56:39.320 --> 0:56:41.439 You know, a lot of there's a lot of crossover. Yeah, 0:56:41.480 --> 0:56:43.160 a lot of a lot of opera singers start as 0:56:43.200 --> 0:56:46.759 theater kids. Because I mean in your your hometown, is 0:56:46.840 --> 0:56:49.640 there an opera is there? Is there an opera stage? 0:56:49.719 --> 0:56:53.319 Probably not, but there's probably a community theater, so there 0:56:53.400 --> 0:56:56.680 there does tend to be the ven diagram is almost 0:56:56.800 --> 0:56:59.080 a circle, I would say, yeah, which might be a 0:56:59.120 --> 0:57:00.799 controversial tape that you used to. 0:57:00.800 --> 0:57:01.359 Be a theater kid? 0:57:01.480 --> 0:57:02.279 Yes, yes I did. 0:57:02.440 --> 0:57:03.839 Do you still identify as a theater kid? 0:57:04.640 --> 0:57:06.400 I think a part of me does. I think a 0:57:06.480 --> 0:57:08.799 part of me really does especially being back in New York. 0:57:08.880 --> 0:57:11.520 I'm like, there's something that there's like a part of 0:57:11.800 --> 0:57:15.960 my child self that like is extremely excited to be 0:57:16.080 --> 0:57:18.800 here just for the clout, I would say, but also 0:57:18.920 --> 0:57:22.120 realistically in my adult brain, I'm like, I'm just paying 0:57:22.160 --> 0:57:25.600 a lot of money to live here and you know, exist, 0:57:25.840 --> 0:57:27.440 and so there's that. 0:57:27.600 --> 0:57:28.959 But it is great. It's a great city. 0:57:29.080 --> 0:57:29.640 I do love it. 0:57:29.840 --> 0:57:30.919 Does singing up or hurt? 0:57:31.920 --> 0:57:35.360 It shouldn't, but sometimes it do be hurting. And when 0:57:35.400 --> 0:57:37.320 it do be hurting, you gotta you gotta stop. 0:57:38.320 --> 0:57:40.880 What happens if you get like a cold, uh, you 0:57:41.200 --> 0:57:42.000 just get you just. 0:57:42.120 --> 0:57:47.840 Gotta either take steroids to try and suppress the symptoms 0:57:48.000 --> 0:57:50.520 to get you through whatever you're getting through, whether that's 0:57:50.600 --> 0:57:53.439 like a show or if you can, you just gotta 0:57:53.480 --> 0:57:56.960 take time off. Unfortunately, do you get grades, Like do 0:57:57.040 --> 0:58:00.000 you have like a person like you sit stand, you say, 0:58:00.080 --> 0:58:02.720 in a room and you sing and then someone go 0:58:02.920 --> 0:58:06.080 like checks or box around. That's literally what graduate opera 0:58:06.120 --> 0:58:09.120 school is like, Yes, like that. That is the majority 0:58:09.160 --> 0:58:11.960 of my classes is getting up. I mean we have 0:58:12.040 --> 0:58:14.560 to take theory and history and all of that good stuff. 0:58:14.680 --> 0:58:16.720 That does you know, that's a separate thing. But a 0:58:16.800 --> 0:58:19.120 lot of the classes are a person of the profession 0:58:19.600 --> 0:58:22.520 and they give you their hot takes, and it's very funny. 0:58:23.400 --> 0:58:27.440 Like the final for singers is called a jury, and 0:58:27.760 --> 0:58:29.480 you stand up in front of a room of older 0:58:29.760 --> 0:58:33.720 like musical people and they give you feedback. But you'll 0:58:33.800 --> 0:58:36.760 have one person give you the feedback of like, oh, 0:58:37.360 --> 0:58:40.120 this song you sang was great in your voice, good job, 0:58:41.000 --> 0:58:42.960 just work on this little thing. And then the next 0:58:43.040 --> 0:58:45.720 person will be like, that song you chose was terrible 0:58:45.760 --> 0:58:47.880 for your voice. I don't know who let you sing that. 0:58:48.680 --> 0:58:51.200 Girl you are you are doomed to failure. 0:58:51.400 --> 0:58:53.520 And then the next person will be like, everything was 0:58:53.600 --> 0:58:56.800 perfect except you mispronounced this word. 0:58:58.200 --> 0:58:58.800 In English? 0:58:59.120 --> 0:58:59.640 Is you know? 0:58:59.800 --> 0:59:03.560 And and but everything else was great. The feedback is 0:59:03.680 --> 0:59:06.000 like wildly different, and so it's kind of hard to 0:59:06.080 --> 0:59:07.120 take something away from it. 0:59:07.320 --> 0:59:09.120 So what's the ultimate goal? Is it like be in 0:59:09.400 --> 0:59:10.680 like the New York Opera? 0:59:11.240 --> 0:59:15.920 Well, I mean that would be wonderful. I actually enjoy 0:59:16.280 --> 0:59:20.080 higher education. So I do hope to be a professor 0:59:20.200 --> 0:59:23.680 someday of music and to carry on carry on the 0:59:24.040 --> 0:59:26.040 legacy of teaching this very. 0:59:27.120 --> 0:59:29.120 This might be a stupid question, but is can it 0:59:29.280 --> 0:59:32.440 can can the voice be taught? Is it not just 0:59:32.560 --> 0:59:34.520 something that one has it? 0:59:34.760 --> 0:59:35.360 It's both. 0:59:35.600 --> 0:59:38.680 I think our anatomy plays a large part in kind 0:59:38.720 --> 0:59:42.440 of where we start. Like if you know some some 0:59:42.720 --> 0:59:44.960 for some people, singing comes naturally. I think we can 0:59:45.040 --> 0:59:47.000 all we all know that, right, Like there are some 0:59:47.120 --> 0:59:49.360 people that we grew up with they just seem like 0:59:49.400 --> 0:59:51.680 they could always singing kind of thing, and then some 0:59:51.880 --> 0:59:55.720 people struggle more so, I think if you enjoy music 0:59:55.760 --> 0:59:57.840 and you enjoy singing, there's a lot that you can 0:59:58.040 --> 1:00:01.920 actually improve on. But we all come from different starting places, 1:00:02.000 --> 1:00:04.480 and I think generally the people who gravitate to opera, 1:00:05.280 --> 1:00:08.120 they usually were like, you know, like the theater kid. 1:00:08.240 --> 1:00:10.200 They got a lot of praise for their voice when 1:00:10.200 --> 1:00:12.360 they were younger, and so they grew up to pursue 1:00:12.440 --> 1:00:16.360 this thing. Like you don't usually see people pursuing opera 1:00:16.400 --> 1:00:18.280 who maybe like are just. 1:00:18.360 --> 1:00:20.960 In it for the people who sound like Abraham Lincoln. 1:00:20.720 --> 1:00:22.080 Who sound like shit, but are in it for the 1:00:22.120 --> 1:00:24.960 love of the game, Like usually not so much. Usually 1:00:25.160 --> 1:00:26.480 that's more like casual. 1:00:26.640 --> 1:00:28.560 But yeah, what do you do outside of opera singing? 1:00:28.600 --> 1:00:29.840 Do you have hobbies of some kind? 1:00:30.320 --> 1:00:34.120 Yeah, I I am a learning how to tune pianos. 1:00:34.400 --> 1:00:37.680 Okay, yeah, so I go, I do you tune them 1:00:37.720 --> 1:00:38.360 with your voice? 1:00:40.000 --> 1:00:43.480 Kind of it uses like similar muscles, I would say, 1:00:43.760 --> 1:00:45.480 I would say, because you have to. You have to 1:00:45.560 --> 1:00:48.360 recognize when something's out of tune, which most people can 1:00:48.440 --> 1:00:50.520 do that. Like you play a piano and it sounds 1:00:50.560 --> 1:00:53.840 like shit, like, oh, that needs to be tuned, you know. 1:00:54.040 --> 1:00:54.760 Same with singing. 1:00:54.800 --> 1:00:57.560 You you hear you hear someone singing out of tune, 1:00:57.600 --> 1:01:00.720 and you know, you know that that's happening, so you 1:01:00.800 --> 1:01:04.040 know it overlaps for sure. But yeah, I like to 1:01:04.160 --> 1:01:06.400 go in there and and take the guts out and 1:01:06.560 --> 1:01:09.280 fiddle around and try and put it back together and 1:01:09.680 --> 1:01:11.800 yeah mmmm and. 1:01:12.160 --> 1:01:14.000 A do you plan to stay here in New York 1:01:14.080 --> 1:01:16.439 City or would you go somewhere else to do your opera? 1:01:16.600 --> 1:01:17.720 I really want to stay here. 1:01:18.040 --> 1:01:21.400 There's a lot going on talking to you and Washington 1:01:21.640 --> 1:01:24.240 Square Park and you know, there's a lot to do, 1:01:25.160 --> 1:01:28.560 There's a lot of people to see. There's a lot 1:01:28.600 --> 1:01:32.000 of gooches to be washed in public fountains, Like where else. 1:01:31.840 --> 1:01:32.280 Do you get? 1:01:32.680 --> 1:01:34.960 I do really want to dive into this fountain? Do 1:01:35.000 --> 1:01:35.640 you want to go next? 1:01:35.680 --> 1:01:35.840 Sir? 1:01:38.120 --> 1:01:38.280 Oh? 1:01:38.480 --> 1:01:42.920 You wanted to. You want to photograph my hands? Okay, 1:01:43.080 --> 1:01:44.919 well wait, give me give me one, give me one moment, 1:01:44.920 --> 1:01:46.400 and then we can we can figure that out. 1:01:46.760 --> 1:01:47.960 Ye have beautiful hands. 1:01:48.440 --> 1:01:50.720 Oh yeah, there's there's a gentleman who wants to photograph 1:01:50.800 --> 1:01:53.560 my hands. Nobody's ever asked me to photograph my hands before. 1:01:53.760 --> 1:01:57.120 Low key, that might be like kind of a fetish thing. 1:01:57.200 --> 1:01:58.680 So do you think it's a fetish thing? I don't care. 1:01:58.720 --> 1:01:59.200 I don't mind. 1:01:59.240 --> 1:02:01.720 Someone can to ask what are you gonna do with 1:02:01.760 --> 1:02:02.320 the photos? 1:02:02.400 --> 1:02:02.520 Oh? 1:02:02.600 --> 1:02:04.960 Yeah, you just enjoy doing it. 1:02:05.160 --> 1:02:08.960 I can't deny that those are very lovely. They're very 1:02:09.080 --> 1:02:12.080 ergonomically shaped. You could hold a lot of different objects 1:02:12.120 --> 1:02:12.760 with those fingers. 1:02:12.800 --> 1:02:16.640 Do you photograph a lot of people's hands? Really? 1:02:17.120 --> 1:02:21.840 It's it's wonderful to see a possible story within those handes. 1:02:23.760 --> 1:02:26.000 Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna have to like I'm gonna 1:02:26.000 --> 1:02:27.640 I'm gonna have would you would you be willing to 1:02:27.720 --> 1:02:31.480 sit down and tell me more about this hat? You 1:02:31.520 --> 1:02:33.439 don't want to sit down. I gotta know, I gotta 1:02:33.440 --> 1:02:35.360 know more about this hand photography business. 1:02:35.520 --> 1:02:37.760 Just short, I mean, I'm happy to show you one 1:02:37.840 --> 1:02:39.160 I did yesterday. 1:02:39.240 --> 1:02:39.920 Or the day before. 1:02:40.480 --> 1:02:45.240 It's up to you to construct this story that person. 1:02:46.080 --> 1:02:49.720 Wait, who's the last person whose hands that you I 1:02:49.760 --> 1:02:52.960 don't know anyone. I just do it, and do you 1:02:53.080 --> 1:02:54.760 just you go up to random people in the park 1:02:54.800 --> 1:02:56.960 and you ask them to if you can photograph. 1:02:56.800 --> 1:02:59.479 Walking on the street and other places of the city. 1:02:59.680 --> 1:03:02.600 Yes, can I see the most the best picture of 1:03:02.680 --> 1:03:03.440 hands that you have. 1:03:04.000 --> 1:03:07.720 You're gonna end up on Wiki hands the last one. 1:03:08.040 --> 1:03:12.040 Yeah, show me the last picture of hands that you took. Okay, 1:03:12.040 --> 1:03:15.960 all right, all right in the meantime, Okay, I'll we'll 1:03:16.080 --> 1:03:17.959 chat while he's pulling with a hand picture. Has anyone 1:03:18.000 --> 1:03:19.520 ever asked you for a picture of your hands? 1:03:19.880 --> 1:03:22.040 I've tried to sell pictures of my feet, but I 1:03:22.120 --> 1:03:24.720 had no buyers. I had no takers really, So if 1:03:24.760 --> 1:03:25.720 you know anyone. 1:03:25.720 --> 1:03:27.320 Have you actually tried to sell pictures I have? 1:03:27.520 --> 1:03:29.200 Maybe it's because I have fat bunyans. 1:03:29.240 --> 1:03:31.600 I don't know where did you Where did you try 1:03:31.680 --> 1:03:32.120 to sell these? 1:03:32.280 --> 1:03:32.440 You know? 1:03:32.560 --> 1:03:35.320 I had like a private Instagram account where I tried 1:03:35.360 --> 1:03:37.520 to sell, but again, like I don't think I was. 1:03:38.040 --> 1:03:40.160 I'm not tech savvy enough to like get into the 1:03:40.280 --> 1:03:41.240 right crowd, you know. 1:03:41.280 --> 1:03:43.960 Okay, I would, yeah, because there's definitely a there's definitely 1:03:44.000 --> 1:03:44.840 a business to it. 1:03:45.120 --> 1:03:49.640 Well, if anyone is really interested in asymmetrical bunyan feet, 1:03:49.800 --> 1:03:51.960 I can I have what they're I have the goods. 1:03:52.200 --> 1:03:55.040 If you genuinely want to, you can. You can uh 1:03:55.520 --> 1:03:58.520 plug your private feet Instagram if you really want to. 1:03:59.000 --> 1:04:01.800 You know, I think I deact. I let the dream die, 1:04:02.400 --> 1:04:06.560 but you're reigniting the dream. I'm wondering if he's going 1:04:06.640 --> 1:04:08.760 to ask for some some feet picks as well as hands. 1:04:08.760 --> 1:04:10.480 You can take pictures of my hands If I don't care, 1:04:10.600 --> 1:04:12.600 Let let you know what, let the universe use my 1:04:12.720 --> 1:04:15.800 body in whatever way is helpful choice. I don't care anymore, 1:04:16.160 --> 1:04:18.280 Just like let let your. 1:04:18.200 --> 1:04:19.080 Body is your art. 1:04:19.280 --> 1:04:20.720 Yeah, my body. I don't know if my body is 1:04:20.760 --> 1:04:23.440 my art, but my body is. My body is resources. 1:04:23.520 --> 1:04:26.440 It's carbon. Yeah, it's something if someone can use it 1:04:26.560 --> 1:04:31.040 to whatever their own. Further that like, if this guy, 1:04:31.240 --> 1:04:33.000 I don't know why he wants pictures of my hands, 1:04:33.040 --> 1:04:35.000 if he really wants to take pictures of my hands 1:04:35.040 --> 1:04:37.640 to you know what, I don't care. I would do whatever. 1:04:37.680 --> 1:04:40.360 Who cares about I'm a little offended he didn't ask 1:04:40.400 --> 1:04:41.400 for a photo of my hand. 1:04:41.480 --> 1:04:45.160 But I mean, I get it, I get it. 1:04:46.760 --> 1:04:50.640 Something special, Nicole, Nicole, is there anything? It's been lovely 1:04:50.680 --> 1:04:53.160 talking to you. I'm I'm, I'm I'm looking forward to 1:04:53.200 --> 1:04:55.080 seeing all your hopes and dreams come true. 1:04:55.200 --> 1:04:56.080 Thank you so much. 1:04:56.240 --> 1:04:57.440 Is there anything else you want to say to the 1:04:57.480 --> 1:04:58.680 people of the computer before we go? 1:05:00.240 --> 1:05:05.800 Wow? I guess like I would like to say, go 1:05:05.960 --> 1:05:06.800 to therapy. 1:05:07.080 --> 1:05:11.440 Yeah, the real therapy, to real therapy, or. 1:05:11.960 --> 1:05:13.720 You know, just talk to chat gybt about you talk 1:05:13.720 --> 1:05:14.160 to chat. 1:05:14.040 --> 1:05:15.320 Gybt for therapy a lot. 1:05:15.640 --> 1:05:18.000 Oh, I mean it's I would say, it's a supplement. 1:05:18.240 --> 1:05:20.920 I think I need you know, I have O c D, 1:05:21.160 --> 1:05:23.600 so sometimes I just need the computer to tell me 1:05:23.680 --> 1:05:26.960 to stop right, Like, I find that it's useful for that. 1:05:27.160 --> 1:05:29.320 How does your OCD manifest itself the most? 1:05:29.680 --> 1:05:29.880 Oh? 1:05:30.880 --> 1:05:35.160 I have like moral OCD moral moral, like existential moral 1:05:35.320 --> 1:05:36.760 OCD in relationship OCD. 1:05:36.960 --> 1:05:39.680 Wait, what is existential moral OCDA? 1:05:39.920 --> 1:05:42.160 Doesn't it sounds No, it doesn't sound bake at all. 1:05:42.400 --> 1:05:44.000 No, I'm big on existential crap. 1:05:44.960 --> 1:05:48.400 Well, I so it manifests for me as like worrying 1:05:48.480 --> 1:05:52.320 about everything I do, negatively impacting either like the environments 1:05:52.400 --> 1:05:54.640 or other people. Oh, sure, Like I used to be 1:05:54.840 --> 1:05:58.000 really obsessive about like plastic use, and I used to 1:05:58.120 --> 1:06:01.120 not let myself drive anywhere just because I'm like, oh, 1:06:01.200 --> 1:06:03.920 but if I like buy this one plastic thing, like 1:06:04.000 --> 1:06:06.240 it's going to exist in the universe forever and it'll 1:06:06.240 --> 1:06:08.800 be my fault and I'll just like spiral out about 1:06:08.840 --> 1:06:09.320 that stuff. 1:06:09.480 --> 1:06:12.400 But so yeah, it's like that, or like, well, you've 1:06:12.440 --> 1:06:15.520 heard the phrase, you know what I'm gonna say, No, 1:06:16.000 --> 1:06:18.080 I guess what. There's there's a phrase that is the 1:06:18.120 --> 1:06:22.240 answer to this. I don't know, tell people there's no 1:06:22.360 --> 1:06:23.640 such thing as ethical consumption. 1:06:24.200 --> 1:06:26.520 Yes, of course I know, and that is sort of yeah, 1:06:27.240 --> 1:06:28.840 I and I didn't find that comforting. 1:06:29.920 --> 1:06:32.479 I heard that. I was like, I'm buying a switch 1:06:32.560 --> 1:06:33.680 to right now. I get me on. 1:06:33.840 --> 1:06:34.800 I'm logged into Amazon. 1:06:34.880 --> 1:06:37.840 Yeah, I'm getting Amazon Prime immediately, I'm getting two of them. 1:06:37.920 --> 1:06:39.720 I'm yeah, ordering everything from Amazon. 1:06:40.080 --> 1:06:40.320 Yeah. 1:06:40.560 --> 1:06:43.000 No, that's really fair, that's really fair. I think what 1:06:43.160 --> 1:06:46.120 helped me was medication and nothing else, honestly. 1:06:45.960 --> 1:06:47.040 Sure what kind of medication. 1:06:47.520 --> 1:06:52.200 Oh, I'm on, I'm on to Alexa and it's a 1:06:52.480 --> 1:06:54.720 SSR and I'm on well viutrin as well. 1:06:54.920 --> 1:06:55.960 Okay, I gotta give. 1:06:57.320 --> 1:06:59.360 It will make you sweat. I don't know like that. 1:06:59.760 --> 1:07:02.720 This what you're wearing now already looks a little bit warm. 1:07:03.000 --> 1:07:06.800 I'm already sweating too much. I yeah, I'm sweating too much. 1:07:07.000 --> 1:07:09.520 Well, are frogs supposed to be a little bit soggy? 1:07:09.680 --> 1:07:09.720 Like? 1:07:09.840 --> 1:07:11.800 Frogs are notoriously wet creatures. 1:07:12.000 --> 1:07:15.840 I'm a gecko. Oh, it's on the side, the kind 1:07:16.040 --> 1:07:16.360 that out. 1:07:16.560 --> 1:07:17.000 Don't put that. 1:07:17.240 --> 1:07:18.240 Okay, Hey, what's up? 1:07:18.280 --> 1:07:18.400 Man? 1:07:18.440 --> 1:07:21.760 Just look at this guy. You're awesome. Man, this guy's sick. 1:07:21.840 --> 1:07:23.120 I feel like I'm hugging your time. 1:07:23.200 --> 1:07:26.640 You're not hugging my time. I you know, like I said, 1:07:26.760 --> 1:07:30.560 what my time? Who cares you guys about anything? 1:07:30.600 --> 1:07:33.960 Dude? Okaystential morality, yeah, existential morality? 1:07:34.320 --> 1:07:35.200 Do you have you have you? 1:07:35.480 --> 1:07:37.200 Do you have you solved it? Or do you still 1:07:37.240 --> 1:07:38.120 feel No? 1:07:38.240 --> 1:07:39.320 I still feel that way. 1:07:39.560 --> 1:07:42.840 It's just not as debilitating because the meds like make 1:07:42.960 --> 1:07:45.320 me focus on other stuff more. 1:07:45.640 --> 1:07:45.800 I no. 1:07:45.920 --> 1:07:47.760 Hearing you say that, it's making me feel like it's 1:07:47.800 --> 1:07:49.280 making me feel good because I'm like, all right, maybe 1:07:49.320 --> 1:07:51.720 the meds could help me not foxate it on fucking 1:07:51.840 --> 1:07:55.160 whatever the hand the hands gentlemen is leaving you're not leaving, 1:07:55.200 --> 1:07:59.960 are you. We gotta talk about hands. Okay, all right, 1:08:00.680 --> 1:08:03.240 we'll come. It's a baby, Okay. 1:08:03.400 --> 1:08:05.120 Did he end up taking a photo of your hands? 1:08:05.200 --> 1:08:06.520 He didn't end up taking a photo of my hand. 1:08:06.560 --> 1:08:08.120 I wanted him to come talk, and he talked a 1:08:08.160 --> 1:08:09.800 little bit, but he didn't. He didn't want to. 1:08:10.160 --> 1:08:13.200 I guess he's brave enough to ask for hand. 1:08:13.480 --> 1:08:15.800 I'm kind of curious now if he's walking around to 1:08:15.960 --> 1:08:17.880 other people asking him to take pictures of their hands. 1:08:17.880 --> 1:08:20.080 I bet he is sup an eye on that man. 1:08:21.000 --> 1:08:23.120 Oh yeah, you can take my photo. There's a there's 1:08:23.120 --> 1:08:27.400 a young lady with a silver nose. Wow, that looks interesting. 1:08:27.600 --> 1:08:29.800 It's moral, you know. I've thought about that before I've gone. 1:08:29.960 --> 1:08:31.519 I've gone into my head and I'm like, is there 1:08:31.560 --> 1:08:35.000 any way for me to exist that isn't horrible. 1:08:34.720 --> 1:08:36.240 That isn't harmful to other people? 1:08:36.479 --> 1:08:36.719 Yeah? 1:08:37.040 --> 1:08:40.479 I think, I think. I think I honestly here. My 1:08:40.960 --> 1:08:44.600 thought process is that, uh, there's so many ways to 1:08:44.680 --> 1:08:45.880 be actively evil. 1:08:46.680 --> 1:08:48.160 Yeah, you know, I really are. 1:08:48.640 --> 1:08:51.600 There's so many ways to be Oh, oh, thank you 1:08:51.720 --> 1:08:55.040 so much. Uh, oh, thank you. That's so kind. She 1:08:55.120 --> 1:08:59.280 took a polaroid or a little a princey thingy, that's 1:08:59.320 --> 1:09:03.160 so kind, that's beautiful. I guess, and let's I guess 1:09:03.320 --> 1:09:05.040 unless if you're trying. I mean, there's people who are 1:09:05.080 --> 1:09:06.920 actively attempting to be evil. 1:09:06.760 --> 1:09:09.000 To be evil, yeah, but do they in their minds 1:09:09.080 --> 1:09:11.600 do they think of it that way, you know? Or 1:09:11.640 --> 1:09:14.240 do they just think, like, well, there's no ethical consumption 1:09:14.320 --> 1:09:15.120 in their capitalism? 1:09:15.200 --> 1:09:16.960 So I even try, you. 1:09:17.000 --> 1:09:18.760 Know, yes, I mean I don't know, like what, like 1:09:18.840 --> 1:09:21.720 what do you I mean you sing opera? Yeah, it's like, 1:09:21.920 --> 1:09:26.200 well you're not You're not fucking you know, going around 1:09:26.479 --> 1:09:28.000 beating the ship out of people. 1:09:27.840 --> 1:09:28.439 Like what what? 1:09:28.720 --> 1:09:29.960 What is that bad? 1:09:30.080 --> 1:09:32.200 That's true. I do try not to do that. I 1:09:32.320 --> 1:09:33.320 try to be a good person. 1:09:33.880 --> 1:09:36.799 But you know, I think there's I think there's strong 1:09:37.000 --> 1:09:38.759 value in the attempt of attempting. 1:09:39.200 --> 1:09:39.680 I think you do. 1:09:39.880 --> 1:09:43.080 I think you do your best, and then once you 1:09:43.240 --> 1:09:45.320 once you start getting your own brain and just trying 1:09:45.320 --> 1:09:47.160 to kill yourself over it, it's like, what are you 1:09:47.200 --> 1:09:48.960 even doing at that point? Who were you helping by 1:09:49.040 --> 1:09:51.640 just by just shaming yourself. 1:09:51.320 --> 1:09:52.600 For self flagellation. 1:09:52.880 --> 1:09:54.240 Yeah, become self fladulating. 1:09:54.560 --> 1:09:55.400 It's not helpful. 1:09:55.600 --> 1:09:59.240 I think that that is more helpful than saying there's 1:09:59.280 --> 1:10:04.200 no I think that the self flagellation not being helpful 1:10:04.720 --> 1:10:08.240 is probably the most helpful advice, just reminding yourself of that. 1:10:08.560 --> 1:10:09.600 But I don't know. 1:10:09.800 --> 1:10:11.960 For me, it's the meds. That's the only the only 1:10:12.040 --> 1:10:13.639 real real help that I've found. 1:10:13.760 --> 1:10:16.280 I'm thinking, I'm thinking, I've been talking about ketamine therapy 1:10:16.360 --> 1:10:20.680 for a while. You've done it. Okay, all right, all right, 1:10:20.760 --> 1:10:22.960 this interview just got way longer because here's the thing. 1:10:23.360 --> 1:10:26.200 So I was, I went through some like existential depression, 1:10:26.240 --> 1:10:27.600 and I was like, and then I and then I 1:10:27.640 --> 1:10:29.880 started taking vibe ance and then for one month I 1:10:29.960 --> 1:10:33.400 felt amazing. In the month of June was the best 1:10:33.479 --> 1:10:35.360 I had felt in my entire life. 1:10:35.479 --> 1:10:35.679 Good. 1:10:36.040 --> 1:10:38.599 I went on, I like, saw my friends. I was like, oh, 1:10:38.640 --> 1:10:42.880 I'm finally back. I finally, after just years of insanity, 1:10:43.760 --> 1:10:47.320 finally I have a people. You know, you know the phrase, oh, 1:10:47.360 --> 1:10:50.720 there's no there. Life is continuously rolling a boulder after hill. 1:10:51.040 --> 1:10:53.320 Not for me, I rolled the boulder on the hill. 1:10:53.439 --> 1:10:55.280 The bowler's on the top of the hill. It's gonna 1:10:55.280 --> 1:10:58.080 stay there forever. The month of June, everything's gonna be 1:10:58.120 --> 1:11:01.800 amazing forever. And now it's Li twenty whatever, and I'm like, 1:11:02.120 --> 1:11:04.839 fucking fuck, my fucking fuck. 1:11:04.840 --> 1:11:06.240 Are you still taking the Vivans? 1:11:07.240 --> 1:11:07.439 Yeah? 1:11:07.479 --> 1:11:09.080 I still take the vibans, but I'm like, oh no, 1:11:09.320 --> 1:11:11.040 And so now I'm like and so I was I 1:11:11.160 --> 1:11:15.479 was feverently researching ketamine therapy before this. Yeah, and so 1:11:15.600 --> 1:11:17.639 now I'm go back. How was your keine therapy? 1:11:18.760 --> 1:11:23.800 It was very interesting. I loved it. I don't know, hmm, 1:11:24.200 --> 1:11:25.280 so I'd alreadyd. 1:11:25.080 --> 1:11:26.800 Did it solve all your problems forever? 1:11:27.360 --> 1:11:30.840 Shockingly? No? But I think it did help. You know 1:11:30.920 --> 1:11:33.640 what it did for me? Tell me it wasn't like 1:11:33.680 --> 1:11:34.640 an immediate. 1:11:34.400 --> 1:11:38.560 Fix to my depression, but it did shake up some 1:11:38.760 --> 1:11:41.639 things that I think I was not wanting to look at, 1:11:41.960 --> 1:11:43.880 like it definitely brought that to the surface. 1:11:44.000 --> 1:11:45.240 Do you want me to tell you about, like the 1:11:45.320 --> 1:11:46.559 whole experience do you want? 1:11:46.680 --> 1:11:46.880 Yeah? 1:11:46.960 --> 1:11:49.720 Yeah? Like so I did, Yeah, like. 1:11:49.800 --> 1:11:52.560 A ketemine therapy that took place over the course of 1:11:52.640 --> 1:11:54.559 I think like three months where I would go into 1:11:54.640 --> 1:11:57.320 a clinic twice a week, so I would k hole 1:11:57.400 --> 1:11:59.679 twice a week. Yeah, I would take time off work 1:12:00.160 --> 1:12:03.080 k hole. My boss would let me go early from 1:12:03.120 --> 1:12:07.120 work to go k hole, and it was. I would 1:12:07.160 --> 1:12:10.639 go into a cozy little room and adminis self administer 1:12:10.720 --> 1:12:14.080 the nasal spray, and then I would just lay back 1:12:14.120 --> 1:12:17.639 on a couch in a dark room and think about 1:12:18.200 --> 1:12:20.000 my life, except I wouldn't really be thinking. 1:12:20.240 --> 1:12:22.040 I was more like falling. 1:12:22.400 --> 1:12:25.640 And then things that I feel like myself my subconscious 1:12:25.720 --> 1:12:29.519 needed me to examine more closely, would come to the surface, 1:12:29.720 --> 1:12:32.320 and then I would have like a trip that was 1:12:32.400 --> 1:12:35.679 centered around some issue that I wasn't like I wasn't 1:12:36.400 --> 1:12:39.360 examining enough in my non k hold state. 1:12:39.720 --> 1:12:42.240 Yeah, yeah, interesting, And I did. 1:12:42.160 --> 1:12:44.000 That for three months. But I know there's a lot 1:12:44.080 --> 1:12:47.719 of variety to ketymine therapy. Like I've heard of people 1:12:47.800 --> 1:12:50.120 who will take a really low dose of it and 1:12:50.240 --> 1:12:52.719 go to and like have a therapist there and basically 1:12:52.800 --> 1:12:54.720 have like a talk therapy session with a really low 1:12:54.760 --> 1:12:55.599 dose of ketamine. 1:12:55.960 --> 1:12:56.880 That's not what I did. 1:12:57.000 --> 1:12:59.559 I was just they they locked me in a room 1:12:59.600 --> 1:13:04.400 and said cee in an hour. So I didn't necessarily 1:13:04.479 --> 1:13:06.680 have the like guidance of like, yeah, I want the 1:13:06.720 --> 1:13:08.920 one with the person that I But you know what 1:13:09.040 --> 1:13:11.000 I did, I found a way run. So I would 1:13:11.040 --> 1:13:13.840 schedule my therapy sessions for right after the K hole. 1:13:14.040 --> 1:13:16.479 Oh very so I would have the K hole. 1:13:16.360 --> 1:13:18.360 And then I would talk about it with my therapist after, 1:13:18.479 --> 1:13:20.200 and she said that those sessions are some of the 1:13:20.280 --> 1:13:21.639 most productive we'd ever had. 1:13:21.720 --> 1:13:23.720 So right, So, how are you doing now? 1:13:24.040 --> 1:13:25.920 I'm doing much better, doing much better. 1:13:26.040 --> 1:13:30.840 There's there's really something to be said for stability, even 1:13:30.960 --> 1:13:32.800 fleeting stability, the little Do. 1:13:32.840 --> 1:13:34.000 You feel stable? 1:13:34.160 --> 1:13:36.919 Yes, I just moved out of a really toxic roommate situation. 1:13:37.200 --> 1:13:39.280 So I have a one bedroom in New York City 1:13:39.479 --> 1:13:41.040 and I'm paying one thousand and three fifty. 1:13:41.240 --> 1:13:44.200 You pay a thousands girl? Oh about do you pay 1:13:44.280 --> 1:13:46.599 thirteen fifty for a one bedroom in New York City? 1:13:46.840 --> 1:13:50.519 I negotiated the rent down and it was not I 1:13:50.640 --> 1:13:52.560 did not use my feet picks to do so. 1:13:52.760 --> 1:13:54.120 That was not a bartering chip. 1:13:54.360 --> 1:13:56.080 I can't believe you pay you have a one bedroom 1:13:56.120 --> 1:13:58.080 for thirteen to fifteen year. That's insane. 1:13:58.520 --> 1:14:00.200 It was listed for really too. 1:14:00.200 --> 1:14:02.240 It's listed for under two k, which is still good 1:14:02.280 --> 1:14:04.960 for one bedroom here in Manhattan. In Manhattan, Yes, it's 1:14:05.040 --> 1:14:08.960 in Inwood, which I love. I love Inwood, Yes, and yeah, 1:14:09.920 --> 1:14:12.160 it's really north. It's basically as north as you can 1:14:12.240 --> 1:14:15.680 possibly get. While still technically being in Manhattan, but it's 1:14:15.760 --> 1:14:17.840 you know, it's along the one line. It's nice, okay, 1:14:17.920 --> 1:14:20.960 but yeah, I like I met the guy. He's I 1:14:21.040 --> 1:14:24.000 think he's from I think he's from Russia. And he 1:14:24.640 --> 1:14:26.760 he listed the apartment for like under two k and 1:14:26.840 --> 1:14:30.120 I went to visit and I was like, I'm not 1:14:30.320 --> 1:14:33.240 totally sold. And I told him I had another offer 1:14:33.439 --> 1:14:36.080 for like one thousand and three hundred, and he was like, 1:14:36.280 --> 1:14:38.439 if we match that price, would you come and live 1:14:38.800 --> 1:14:39.400 in our building? 1:14:39.520 --> 1:14:40.759 Do you have an offer for a thousand? 1:14:43.520 --> 1:14:45.400 The truth is out. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but the 1:14:45.520 --> 1:14:46.280 lease has been signed. 1:14:46.439 --> 1:14:49.720 So so okay, what else is stable with you? 1:14:49.840 --> 1:14:49.960 Now? 1:14:50.240 --> 1:14:51.599 What else is stable? Well? 1:14:52.280 --> 1:14:55.040 I think so, I mean just having my own space, 1:14:55.160 --> 1:14:59.040 that's a that's a that's its own stability. Like I'm 1:14:59.160 --> 1:15:02.360 more comfortable isolation, I think just because of like the 1:15:02.439 --> 1:15:05.360 way my brain works. I think I function better when 1:15:05.360 --> 1:15:07.600 I have a lot of a loan time, So that 1:15:07.920 --> 1:15:10.560 for me is like a good source of stability. I 1:15:10.800 --> 1:15:13.559 am in a lot of student debt, but I mean 1:15:13.640 --> 1:15:17.040 that's consistent in like money coming in, even if it 1:15:17.160 --> 1:15:19.519 is loans that I'll probably never be able to pay 1:15:19.640 --> 1:15:20.000 off on. 1:15:20.080 --> 1:15:24.280 A professor's salary. But you know it's all good. So 1:15:24.760 --> 1:15:26.600 you know, I have the financial stability. 1:15:26.880 --> 1:15:27.200 I just. 1:15:28.760 --> 1:15:30.160 I have a lot of a lot of stuff in 1:15:30.200 --> 1:15:32.719 the works. I'll say, there's a lot of things bubbling. 1:15:32.800 --> 1:15:33.280 There's po. 1:15:34.920 --> 1:15:37.719 Switch pot excited about I'm excited about. 1:15:37.520 --> 1:15:38.719 The piano tuning pot. 1:15:39.360 --> 1:15:40.280 I'm excited about that. 1:15:40.360 --> 1:15:46.040 I'm excited about I'm excited about starting to teach teach again. 1:15:46.160 --> 1:15:50.720 I'm excited about that, teach voice lessons to kids. What 1:15:50.880 --> 1:15:52.160 else am I excited about? 1:15:52.840 --> 1:15:53.160 I don't know. 1:15:53.200 --> 1:15:55.840 I'm excited to be in the city in the summer, 1:15:56.520 --> 1:16:01.040 with a place of my own, and the only responsibility 1:16:01.080 --> 1:16:02.840 I have today is installing a shelf. 1:16:03.960 --> 1:16:06.920 You know, I'm I'm happy to hear that things are 1:16:06.960 --> 1:16:10.000 going well for you. Everyone. Pretty much everyone who sat 1:16:10.080 --> 1:16:12.760 down to talk today seemed as though they were up. 1:16:13.280 --> 1:16:16.240 Yeah it's an upday' I mean, like this is the 1:16:16.439 --> 1:16:18.439 if you're gonna have an update in New York City, 1:16:18.560 --> 1:16:20.120 Like this is where all the people who are up 1:16:20.200 --> 1:16:20.840 are gonna come. 1:16:20.920 --> 1:16:22.559 I think, Yeah, I mean, well this is a place 1:16:22.600 --> 1:16:23.800 where you go to get up. 1:16:24.320 --> 1:16:24.519 Yeah. 1:16:25.040 --> 1:16:27.320 Well, I I was just planning on walking through here. 1:16:27.400 --> 1:16:28.679 I wasn't even to be honest. 1:16:28.800 --> 1:16:30.439 I was sort of lying to at the beginning of this, 1:16:30.600 --> 1:16:33.080 saying that I came for the Gooch exposure. 1:16:32.920 --> 1:16:33.840 But I actually was not. 1:16:34.280 --> 1:16:36.600 I didn't think that you came here it. 1:16:36.760 --> 1:16:40.200 Oh you didn't take me literally, No, yeah, no, that 1:16:40.439 --> 1:16:42.760 was that was an exaggeration of the truth I did. 1:16:43.040 --> 1:16:45.400 I did recognize this fountain. Then I said, oh, that's 1:16:45.439 --> 1:16:47.599 the fountain where the guy was watching his goo chat. 1:16:47.760 --> 1:16:49.400 Oh, I thought this was the friend's fountain. 1:16:50.280 --> 1:16:52.960 I mean, you know a song by any other name. 1:16:54.400 --> 1:16:57.519 What's your name again, Nicole? Nicole, Nicole. This has been 1:16:57.520 --> 1:16:59.760 a great conversation. I very much enjoyed talking to you. 1:17:00.920 --> 1:17:03.320 I hope that I said this already when I when 1:17:03.439 --> 1:17:05.280 I was in first gonna end this conversation, But then 1:17:05.280 --> 1:17:06.439 you start talking about ketamine. 1:17:06.560 --> 1:17:07.559 I hope out. 1:17:07.680 --> 1:17:09.320 I'm gonna try I think I'm gonna try it out. 1:17:09.400 --> 1:17:10.240 We'll see what happens. 1:17:10.400 --> 1:17:12.679 I don't think you'll have a bad experience. If that's 1:17:12.800 --> 1:17:15.439 what's been like, you've not wanted to fully. 1:17:15.439 --> 1:17:17.280 No, that's not been the main reason. There's a bunch 1:17:17.280 --> 1:17:20.400 of reasons I would not mind flick. But I'm gonna okay, Well, 1:17:20.400 --> 1:17:22.680 I don't know right now, by my, my, my. 1:17:22.880 --> 1:17:22.920 My. 1:17:23.040 --> 1:17:25.360 Main form of SSRI right now has been this switch to. 1:17:25.560 --> 1:17:26.759 So I'm gonna see how that works. 1:17:27.880 --> 1:17:30.080 I haven't tried that one yet, but I've heard good thing. 1:17:30.520 --> 1:17:31.760 Dude, I don't know. I wasn't gonna get it. I 1:17:31.920 --> 1:17:33.840 I thought that. I looked at the new Donkey Kong 1:17:33.880 --> 1:17:35.200 game and I was like, who is this guy? This 1:17:35.360 --> 1:17:36.880 is not my guy. This is a different guy. This 1:17:37.000 --> 1:17:37.840 is not Donkey Kong. 1:17:38.000 --> 1:17:38.120 Oh. 1:17:38.280 --> 1:17:40.439 Yes, I've heard, because they redesigned it. But now now, 1:17:40.479 --> 1:17:41.600 apparently I don't know. 1:17:41.760 --> 1:17:43.360 Because Donkey Kong woke, she woke. 1:17:43.400 --> 1:17:44.120 Now I don't. 1:17:44.160 --> 1:17:47.640 I don't know. Maybe he's woke. He looked a little like, 1:17:47.920 --> 1:17:51.280 actually he's less woke. His eyes are smaller, Okay, Okay, 1:17:51.560 --> 1:17:57.599 yeah yeah, smaller eyes, smaller eyes conservative, So he's uh, 1:17:58.439 --> 1:18:00.559 I don't know, but I don't know. Apparently it's good. 1:18:00.640 --> 1:18:02.800 So I'm gonna tonight. I'm gonna. 1:18:04.080 --> 1:18:06.320 I'm surprised you were even able to get a switch to. 1:18:06.680 --> 1:18:09.240 I waited in line this morning this morning. Yeah, I 1:18:09.720 --> 1:18:11.840 got connected to my inner child this morning. I was like, 1:18:11.920 --> 1:18:14.559 I haven't waited in line to buy a video game 1:18:14.640 --> 1:18:17.439 since nineteen seventy nine. 1:18:17.479 --> 1:18:19.760 I don't think kenymine is gonna top that experience for you. 1:18:19.840 --> 1:18:21.120 I'm sorry, it's not well. 1:18:21.200 --> 1:18:22.880 I mean, I don't know. Maybe I'll do ketamine and 1:18:22.920 --> 1:18:26.600 play Donkey Kong and that'll work. Yeah that, you know. 1:18:27.120 --> 1:18:29.120 I never tried that, but I think if I tried 1:18:29.160 --> 1:18:29.840 that that much. 1:18:29.720 --> 1:18:32.240 Actually, that's how the guy from Friends died. So I 1:18:32.280 --> 1:18:32.920 don't want to do that. 1:18:33.160 --> 1:18:34.720 But oh really I didn't know that. 1:18:34.960 --> 1:18:38.920 Okay, he was playing Actually I don't know if I 1:18:38.960 --> 1:18:40.320 don't know what he was doing, but he was doing 1:18:40.960 --> 1:18:43.599 he was doing ketamine outside of some form of record, 1:18:43.680 --> 1:18:45.800 outside of a medical. 1:18:45.880 --> 1:18:46.720 Are you being for real? 1:18:46.880 --> 1:18:47.080 Yeah? 1:18:47.120 --> 1:18:47.320 Yeah? 1:18:47.400 --> 1:18:47.559 Yeah? 1:18:47.680 --> 1:18:51.559 Oh wow, yeah wow, Okay, but you know, well yeah, 1:18:52.240 --> 1:18:54.560 I advocate for the safe use of ketamine. 1:18:54.680 --> 1:18:57.439 Yeah, me too. I advocate for all safe good things. 1:18:57.680 --> 1:18:57.880 Yeah. 1:18:58.320 --> 1:19:00.479 Yeah, we're gonna be fine. Everything's gonna be fun. Everyone 1:19:00.520 --> 1:19:02.479 in this park is gonna be fine. Everyone's up. So 1:19:02.800 --> 1:19:05.559 everyone's good. We're all getting switched to s. We're all 1:19:05.920 --> 1:19:12.799 uh getting beautiful families. Wow, we're all getting a wonderful 1:19:12.840 --> 1:19:16.160 fulfilling careers. Yes, yes, we're all getting ten million dollars. 1:19:16.320 --> 1:19:18.040 We're all getting our bunions shaved. 1:19:17.800 --> 1:19:19.200 Off, getting our bunions shaved off. 1:19:19.360 --> 1:19:21.560 Have you ever looked at what that surgery is like? No, 1:19:22.560 --> 1:19:23.200 I haven't either. 1:19:23.360 --> 1:19:27.000 It's fucking crocodile, dundee, dude, check this guy out. Oh 1:19:27.200 --> 1:19:30.719 never mind, never mind, I said, sorry, Yes, I said, 1:19:30.880 --> 1:19:33.320 I said it's crocodile, dundee. Check this guy out because 1:19:33.320 --> 1:19:35.360 you looked kind of like you had the Oh thanks, 1:19:35.400 --> 1:19:39.240 but I love your fit of course. Hey you too, man. 1:19:39.439 --> 1:19:41.000 I think that guy was trying to wrangle you. 1:19:41.240 --> 1:19:43.839 You're trying to wrangle me. Yeah, it looks like the crocodile. 1:19:43.960 --> 1:19:44.720 Yeah, I would watch it. 1:19:44.800 --> 1:19:45.479 We didn't have the hat. 1:19:45.680 --> 1:19:47.720 There's a lot of predators around here. 1:19:47.760 --> 1:19:50.000 I've noticed, like there's been two people who've come up 1:19:50.000 --> 1:19:51.799 to you while I've been in this chair who've wanted 1:19:51.960 --> 1:19:52.640 something from you. 1:19:52.960 --> 1:19:55.120 Dude, I don't know where the hands pick guy is. 1:19:55.200 --> 1:19:56.639 I gotta find them or maybe I don't. 1:19:56.800 --> 1:19:58.280 Just you should be safe, you know. 1:19:58.520 --> 1:20:00.600 I promised him a hand pick. I feel bad now 1:20:00.640 --> 1:20:04.280 if I don't give them my hands what's your name? 1:20:04.320 --> 1:20:04.840 One more time? 1:20:05.000 --> 1:20:06.439 I'm Nicole. I'm so sorry. 1:20:07.000 --> 1:20:08.360 You don't have to be sorry for anything. 1:20:08.520 --> 1:20:10.519 No, I don't have anywhere else to be such a 1:20:10.600 --> 1:20:12.000 yappy mood right now too. 1:20:12.080 --> 1:20:15.280 I started, honestly, honestly kind of at the very very 1:20:15.400 --> 1:20:18.080 very beginning of this podcast, I was like, Fuck, I 1:20:18.120 --> 1:20:19.920 don't think I have the energy to talk today, but 1:20:20.040 --> 1:20:21.920 I you know, we're gonna try, but. 1:20:22.000 --> 1:20:22.640 Towards and you. 1:20:22.880 --> 1:20:26.280 Normally what happens is the first half I have no energy. 1:20:26.520 --> 1:20:27.840 Though the first half I have a lot of energy, 1:20:27.880 --> 1:20:31.040 The second half I have no energy. Today's podcast was different. Today. 1:20:31.080 --> 1:20:34.280 I had a lot of less energy. The first half morega. 1:20:34.320 --> 1:20:36.000 The second half, Oh good, And now I feel good 1:20:36.439 --> 1:20:41.240 good you know what, Nicole, Yeah, everything's fine, Everything. 1:20:41.000 --> 1:20:44.760 Is fine, Everything is going to be fine. And I 1:20:44.920 --> 1:20:47.719 really feel that today I feel like there's an energy 1:20:47.800 --> 1:20:53.240 in the air. Sorry, I just caught a glimpse of 1:20:54.080 --> 1:20:56.880 like the shoe underneath the gecko foot, and I feel 1:20:56.880 --> 1:20:59.639 like I just saw like a peek behind the curtain. 1:21:00.160 --> 1:21:03.280 Faz shoes they break in one month. I buy a 1:21:03.320 --> 1:21:05.040 new one every month. I should just get a nicer 1:21:05.080 --> 1:21:07.519 pair of shoes that don't break down. But I'm lazy, 1:21:07.600 --> 1:21:09.120 and I is there a. 1:21:09.120 --> 1:21:12.400 Specific reason why, like that pair of shoes from Amazon. 1:21:12.160 --> 1:21:14.920 I just go on Amazon and search shoes. I'm not 1:21:14.960 --> 1:21:15.680 a fashion man. 1:21:16.439 --> 1:21:17.280 You could have fooled me. 1:21:19.800 --> 1:21:22.200 Because of the suit. Yeah, I wonder if there's a 1:21:22.240 --> 1:21:25.040 guy over here. He's holding a box of cookies. I'm 1:21:25.080 --> 1:21:27.040 wondering if if I let him sit down, if maybe 1:21:27.080 --> 1:21:29.000 he'll give me I think, I think Do you think 1:21:29.040 --> 1:21:29.320 you will? 1:21:29.439 --> 1:21:30.720 Yeah? I think you should take a chance. 1:21:31.560 --> 1:21:33.519 Enjoyed, Nicole? Is anything else? I say the people of 1:21:33.520 --> 1:21:35.519 the computer before we go to the people of. 1:21:35.600 --> 1:21:40.479 The computer, be boot boom bop be boot boop be bop. 1:21:40.640 --> 1:21:41.519 Don't know what that means. 1:21:41.760 --> 1:21:42.439 Don't know what that means? 1:21:42.520 --> 1:21:46.400 Computers, I speak, I speak computer, and yeah, I think 1:21:46.439 --> 1:21:47.479 all computers will understand. 1:21:47.680 --> 1:21:49.200 I'll throw that in Google Translate later. 1:21:49.360 --> 1:21:50.000 Good you should. 1:21:51.240 --> 1:21:54.040 I'll see her in the universe. I will, I will. 1:21:54.120 --> 1:21:58.439 Apparently they're worth Money's your name, Yuki? You get nice 1:21:58.439 --> 1:22:02.439 to meet you. I actually don't know if I have time. Well, 1:22:02.600 --> 1:22:07.160 let's do a quick wrap up, shall we. Okay, one 1:22:07.280 --> 1:22:09.320 thing that you want to say to the people listening 1:22:09.439 --> 1:22:11.880 up to this podcast before we go anything. 1:22:13.760 --> 1:22:17.360 Think about yourself first and only really Yeah, fun. 1:22:17.320 --> 1:22:18.479 Now I want to talk to you about more things. 1:22:18.479 --> 1:22:21.120 We don't have. How much power batter is on this guy? 1:22:25.360 --> 1:22:26.360 Seventeen percent? Okay? 1:22:26.400 --> 1:22:26.559 Cool? 1:22:26.560 --> 1:22:26.800 All right? 1:22:26.880 --> 1:22:29.599 Richall yu gi. Yeah, why why should we only think 1:22:29.600 --> 1:22:30.640 about ourselves. 1:22:30.880 --> 1:22:32.160 Because no one will will do it? 1:22:32.680 --> 1:22:33.160 Yes, it is. 1:22:33.320 --> 1:22:36.000 I mean at some point, even your parents think about themselves, 1:22:36.040 --> 1:22:39.960 I know, and they they should also live their own life. 1:22:39.960 --> 1:22:43.320 I know, because I need to understand that they also 1:22:43.479 --> 1:22:47.120 need to be like themselves and continue their lives at 1:22:47.160 --> 1:22:51.000 some point, and so you need to cut down when 1:22:51.040 --> 1:22:51.439 they don't. 1:22:51.760 --> 1:22:53.479 Yeah, we need So you need to. 1:22:54.200 --> 1:22:58.280 Do it yourself and think about yourself for your future 1:22:58.360 --> 1:22:59.040 life and et cetera. 1:22:59.840 --> 1:23:02.880 It is very true. I you know, I don't know. 1:23:02.960 --> 1:23:04.960 I think my most of my life, I thought of 1:23:05.040 --> 1:23:07.400 myself as like a staunch individualist, where I was like, 1:23:07.439 --> 1:23:09.599 I gotta make sure you know, I'm really like mainly 1:23:09.640 --> 1:23:11.680 thinking about my own life. And then I was like, no, 1:23:11.800 --> 1:23:13.720 the key to life is community, and like how you 1:23:13.800 --> 1:23:15.439 want to integrate yourself with other people and you want 1:23:15.479 --> 1:23:17.000 to your life is only me as good as the 1:23:17.040 --> 1:23:18.960 other people in it. And then I flip back and 1:23:19.040 --> 1:23:21.479 forth and I'm like, well shit, you know it's true. 1:23:21.560 --> 1:23:23.880 You as you get older, you start to realize, Okay, 1:23:24.000 --> 1:23:26.519 your parents love you and that's great and you and 1:23:26.600 --> 1:23:29.160 if you're lucky, you grow up that being the default 1:23:29.200 --> 1:23:31.120 your parents love you, Your parents care about you. Then 1:23:31.160 --> 1:23:32.840 as you get older, the amount of people who are 1:23:32.920 --> 1:23:36.519 like you can have friends and you're gonna have people 1:23:36.600 --> 1:23:38.840 in the peripheral of your life that you see, but 1:23:39.000 --> 1:23:42.920 the amount of people who are in your life starts 1:23:42.960 --> 1:23:45.599 to decrease and you start to slowly realize like you're 1:23:46.120 --> 1:23:48.000 exact the only one in your life. So you got 1:23:48.080 --> 1:23:49.360 to make sure unless if you know, you have a 1:23:50.200 --> 1:23:51.479 wife or kids or something like that. 1:23:51.720 --> 1:23:55.320 But and I think the better you love yourself, the 1:23:55.439 --> 1:23:58.439 better you'll be loved on your group and on your community. Yeah, 1:23:58.520 --> 1:24:02.240 because you will like put the limits and all the 1:24:02.320 --> 1:24:06.400 boundaries that you want and it will be like the 1:24:06.920 --> 1:24:12.679 healthier relationships, which means that you first think about yourself. 1:24:13.400 --> 1:24:15.960 And for that, I will encourage you everyone to go 1:24:16.080 --> 1:24:19.439 to a therapist. I'm from friends and like, this is 1:24:19.520 --> 1:24:22.479 not something that's cool yet over there. 1:24:22.640 --> 1:24:24.040 Oh, therapy is not cool in friends? 1:24:24.200 --> 1:24:24.800 No, not yet? 1:24:25.160 --> 1:24:26.679 Why not yet? It's going to become cool? 1:24:26.880 --> 1:24:29.400 Yeah of course. I mean at some point people will 1:24:29.800 --> 1:24:31.840 go crazy and you will have to go. 1:24:32.280 --> 1:24:34.160 Why do you think therapy is not cool in France? 1:24:35.040 --> 1:24:40.160 I think it's still like something that you put as 1:24:40.400 --> 1:24:41.000 crazy people. 1:24:41.840 --> 1:24:45.920 Yeah, for real and people don't understand the value of 1:24:46.240 --> 1:24:49.840 being good with yourself and go into a therapy. 1:24:49.920 --> 1:24:52.400 I'm a teacher. One of the things every time my 1:24:52.560 --> 1:24:54.960 students come to me like with issues. 1:24:54.720 --> 1:24:59.040 Blah blah blah, go to therapists, especially like immigrants, children 1:24:59.080 --> 1:25:01.760 and blah blah blah. Then to go because the duality 1:25:01.880 --> 1:25:06.200 between their lives in friends or in any country, plus 1:25:06.439 --> 1:25:11.000 their origins or parents' origins, it's a messing up moment 1:25:11.080 --> 1:25:11.759 of their lives. 1:25:12.400 --> 1:25:15.040 That's you do you go to a therapist? What are 1:25:15.040 --> 1:25:16.200 you talking about with your therapists? 1:25:16.680 --> 1:25:21.040 My parents? Mostly because I think this is the main 1:25:21.160 --> 1:25:22.080 issue for everyone. 1:25:22.800 --> 1:25:24.479 The main issue for everyone is their parents. 1:25:25.240 --> 1:25:29.040 How so, I mean because the parents lives their life 1:25:29.120 --> 1:25:31.880 for the first time as you are. So they don't 1:25:32.000 --> 1:25:35.360 know how to drive sometimes their life and they have 1:25:35.520 --> 1:25:38.479 to learn with you and when they do it. And 1:25:38.600 --> 1:25:41.719 they were not like us now with all these elements 1:25:41.800 --> 1:25:43.880 that you can have on the internet and everything. So 1:25:44.280 --> 1:25:46.639 they learned not good on a good way. 1:25:47.640 --> 1:25:50.720 Okay, So everything starts with parents because you learn from 1:25:50.760 --> 1:25:52.559 your parents, and how your parents treat you is kind 1:25:52.600 --> 1:25:54.680 of how you feel exactly. Yeah, that makes a lot 1:25:54.720 --> 1:25:57.080 of sense. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Do 1:25:57.160 --> 1:25:58.400 you have good parents. 1:26:00.080 --> 1:26:00.240 Try? 1:26:00.520 --> 1:26:03.760 Okay, they try to give kids. I don't have yet. Okay, 1:26:04.040 --> 1:26:07.000 but you want to have kids, Yeah, what are you gonna? 1:26:07.479 --> 1:26:09.640 What do you want to impart upon your children. 1:26:10.200 --> 1:26:14.000 To love themselves, to be confident enough to be like 1:26:14.560 --> 1:26:18.000 in a loving environment where they can share with me? 1:26:18.680 --> 1:26:21.200 Because I think I was not able to share with 1:26:21.400 --> 1:26:24.400 my parents when I was not like feeling good or 1:26:24.600 --> 1:26:27.960 when something was not good for me and they didn't know. 1:26:28.120 --> 1:26:30.560 So I cannot blame them because I was not on 1:26:30.640 --> 1:26:33.360 a safe place to share. Yeah, so I want to 1:26:33.520 --> 1:26:36.840 have like for my kids, if I have ones, a 1:26:36.920 --> 1:26:39.160 safe place for them to share anything they want to 1:26:39.280 --> 1:26:39.760 share with me. 1:26:40.800 --> 1:26:43.439 So, yeah, I feel bad because you're you know, you're 1:26:43.439 --> 1:26:46.800 really being very vulnerable. You're being very vulnerable with me, 1:26:47.000 --> 1:26:49.559 with me right now, and I am like, I'm very 1:26:49.600 --> 1:26:52.920 engrossed in this conversation. But there's at least like ten 1:26:52.960 --> 1:26:54.600 percent of my brain it's like I wonder if I 1:26:54.640 --> 1:26:56.160 wonder if he's gonna let me have a cookie. 1:26:56.479 --> 1:26:58.360 Yeah, of course you know you can. 1:26:58.520 --> 1:26:59.000 You can have them. 1:26:59.040 --> 1:27:01.800 But because we didn't like but you didn't like them, no, 1:27:02.120 --> 1:27:03.880 because we we had like to test it because we 1:27:03.920 --> 1:27:05.280 were visiting, so we had. 1:27:05.200 --> 1:27:06.479 Like, can I see what? Can I see what you 1:27:06.560 --> 1:27:08.120 gotten there? Okay? So you tried it? 1:27:08.240 --> 1:27:09.080 You didn't like it? Andy? 1:27:09.120 --> 1:27:11.280 No, it was one with lemon and I don't even 1:27:11.320 --> 1:27:11.840 know this one. 1:27:12.080 --> 1:27:14.360 Oh this is like a that's like a cream. 1:27:14.680 --> 1:27:17.000 Yeah, we didn't like beat on him, so you can try. 1:27:16.880 --> 1:27:18.040 It's pretty good. 1:27:18.240 --> 1:27:18.439 Yeah. 1:27:18.520 --> 1:27:22.320 Here, well Norris you did Why didn't you like him? 1:27:23.240 --> 1:27:23.560 I don't know. 1:27:23.680 --> 1:27:25.000 But you're visiting from France? 1:27:25.080 --> 1:27:25.920 Yeah, exactly. 1:27:27.720 --> 1:27:28.000 Are you? 1:27:30.080 --> 1:27:31.000 How long are you in New York for? 1:27:31.760 --> 1:27:35.760 So we arrived on like last Wednesday and we are 1:27:35.800 --> 1:27:37.400 here until next Saturday. 1:27:37.520 --> 1:27:39.040 What do you observe about New York? 1:27:39.920 --> 1:27:40.040 Oh? 1:27:40.200 --> 1:27:40.920 So so loud? 1:27:42.360 --> 1:27:43.200 Where in France do you live? 1:27:43.320 --> 1:27:43.559 Pi? 1:27:43.800 --> 1:27:46.120 Okay, but how do you compare New York to Paris? 1:27:46.520 --> 1:27:50.559 It's so loud, people are like always screaming or stuff 1:27:50.640 --> 1:27:55.200 like this. Uh, but more generous and more friendly. People 1:27:55.200 --> 1:27:58.000 are more generous and friendly here. Of course I'm from Paris, 1:27:58.040 --> 1:28:01.080 so I mean the less Okay, for the first time 1:28:01.120 --> 1:28:02.320 in New York, No second time? 1:28:02.439 --> 1:28:03.880 Okay. Why do you guys come to New York? 1:28:04.880 --> 1:28:05.920 Especially living in Tampa? 1:28:06.000 --> 1:28:08.920 So I come often in the US and it has 1:28:09.000 --> 1:28:10.880 been three years now, so I wanted to come back 1:28:11.320 --> 1:28:11.720 very nice. 1:28:11.840 --> 1:28:12.040 Yeah. 1:28:12.320 --> 1:28:14.120 What are the French think of Americans? Do they think 1:28:14.160 --> 1:28:17.320 that we're stupid? You can say yes, if that's the truth. 1:28:17.640 --> 1:28:18.439 I don't think that there. 1:28:19.040 --> 1:28:21.840 They can't think about this because we're that stupid as 1:28:21.920 --> 1:28:23.680 much as American could be. 1:28:24.120 --> 1:28:25.719 I mean's goods. 1:28:26.120 --> 1:28:28.960 I mean, we almost elected the guy who never worked 1:28:29.000 --> 1:28:31.720 in his life, but for real, like never in his life. 1:28:32.120 --> 1:28:36.519 He's famous for probably shitting in his pants on this 1:28:36.920 --> 1:28:38.680 only year of college that he did. 1:28:38.920 --> 1:28:42.080 He's famous for shitting in his pants. Really, what's this 1:28:42.120 --> 1:28:42.559 guy's name? 1:28:42.600 --> 1:28:44.680 This is the rumor that we have, and he has 1:28:44.760 --> 1:28:49.080 been the first runner of the European election last year year? 1:28:49.439 --> 1:28:49.679 Really? 1:28:49.920 --> 1:28:52.160 Can you so we are not Macrown? 1:28:52.320 --> 1:28:52.439 Right? 1:28:52.600 --> 1:28:52.640 No? 1:28:52.720 --> 1:28:55.519 No, that's not mcons Bardilla Okay yeah, but. 1:28:55.640 --> 1:28:56.840 And who did you vote for him? 1:28:57.080 --> 1:28:57.479 Of course not? 1:28:58.000 --> 1:28:59.920 Is he like them? Is he like the French Trump? 1:29:01.200 --> 1:29:04.320 I can't even say if he's the French Trump or 1:29:04.840 --> 1:29:05.680 he's far right? 1:29:06.360 --> 1:29:07.200 Okay, that's that's it. 1:29:07.400 --> 1:29:08.800 I mean, this is not the same way that it 1:29:08.920 --> 1:29:13.040 works because we have so many political groups and everything. 1:29:13.640 --> 1:29:16.560 Do do your friends go to therapy or is it 1:29:16.640 --> 1:29:17.160 mainly just you? 1:29:17.439 --> 1:29:17.479 No? 1:29:17.560 --> 1:29:21.920 No, some of my friends goes, and hopefully most of 1:29:22.040 --> 1:29:24.880 them will go at some point. Okay, I'm doing this 1:29:25.080 --> 1:29:28.880 lobbying for them to go. Mm hmmmm, because I'm paying 1:29:28.960 --> 1:29:29.479 now for them? 1:29:29.920 --> 1:29:31.160 Are you you're paying for your friends? 1:29:31.400 --> 1:29:33.800 You're paying because they come to me to have like 1:29:33.920 --> 1:29:34.840 therapy conversations. 1:29:34.880 --> 1:29:36.640 Oh, you're the therapist exact. 1:29:37.960 --> 1:29:39.200 Either of me or someone else. 1:29:39.320 --> 1:29:41.280 Okay, yeah, So are you a good person to go 1:29:41.360 --> 1:29:42.799 to for for therapy? 1:29:43.160 --> 1:29:44.920 I don't know. I'm not gonna judge myself. 1:29:45.760 --> 1:29:47.760 Yeah, to do a lot of people to I mean, 1:29:47.800 --> 1:29:49.280 if you're if a lot of people go to you 1:29:49.360 --> 1:29:51.880 for therapy it pints, you're probably good at it or 1:29:51.920 --> 1:29:54.360 else they wouldn't come to you, like we have to 1:29:54.640 --> 1:29:55.040 ask them. 1:29:55.200 --> 1:29:55.600 I don't know. 1:29:56.080 --> 1:29:58.040 Do do a lot of your friends go to you for? 1:29:58.160 --> 1:29:59.479 What kinds of things? Do your friends ask you for 1:29:59.479 --> 1:30:00.000 advice about? 1:30:01.560 --> 1:30:04.800 Mostly with their family, because we all struggle with this 1:30:06.120 --> 1:30:09.000 energy we don't have with our parents and immigrant parents. 1:30:09.280 --> 1:30:10.280 My parents are from Turkey. 1:30:10.400 --> 1:30:13.439 They came to friends, so it's not the same way 1:30:13.520 --> 1:30:15.200 that we see et cetera and everything. 1:30:15.280 --> 1:30:18.120 So we mostly have the same issues, all of them. 1:30:18.439 --> 1:30:20.599 Okay, so you guys all have very similar like family 1:30:20.680 --> 1:30:24.400 lives exactly. How old are you? You're three four? Okay, 1:30:24.479 --> 1:30:27.040 and so all your friends like and your friends are 1:30:27.040 --> 1:30:28.880 all kind of same age, yeah exactly, and so you're 1:30:28.880 --> 1:30:31.519 all like from like similar like generation exactly. 1:30:31.720 --> 1:30:34.880 Yeah, okay, the nineties we grew up with Internet, coming 1:30:35.360 --> 1:30:36.240 forms and everything. 1:30:36.320 --> 1:30:38.960 Are you still friends with are still not friends? 1:30:39.000 --> 1:30:39.200 Of course? 1:30:39.200 --> 1:30:40.880 You're friends with your friends, are you? Are you still 1:30:40.920 --> 1:30:42.400 like close with very friends? You get to see them 1:30:42.479 --> 1:30:42.840 very often? 1:30:42.920 --> 1:30:43.080 Yeah? 1:30:43.120 --> 1:30:43.439 Of course. 1:30:43.960 --> 1:30:44.800 Do they all live in Paris? 1:30:45.080 --> 1:30:46.840 Yeah, we live all on the same area. 1:30:47.080 --> 1:30:49.240 That's so fucking now. How long have you been friends 1:30:49.280 --> 1:30:49.760 with these people? 1:30:51.040 --> 1:30:51.960 Fifteen twenty years? 1:30:52.400 --> 1:30:55.599 It's so nice, man. Yeah, that's a real blessing. I wish, 1:30:56.160 --> 1:30:57.840 you know, I have a group of like there's nine 1:30:57.880 --> 1:30:59.640 of us, and like, you know, I've been friends with 1:30:59.640 --> 1:31:01.240 them for a long time. But you know, we all 1:31:01.320 --> 1:31:03.559 kind of we're all like in the same like East Coast. 1:31:03.760 --> 1:31:06.160 But like if everyone lived in the same neighborhood, I 1:31:06.200 --> 1:31:07.040 mean that would beautiful. 1:31:07.320 --> 1:31:07.479 Yeah. 1:31:07.520 --> 1:31:10.440 I think we tried to live in the same neighborhood 1:31:10.479 --> 1:31:12.680 because also when you're in friends, it's not like here 1:31:13.080 --> 1:31:16.040 you have to live in Paris to have better jobs 1:31:16.160 --> 1:31:19.479 and everything. So it's all mostly on the same places, 1:31:19.560 --> 1:31:22.519 so then you choose to be still with them. I 1:31:22.600 --> 1:31:24.840 have some of them living in other cities, but it's 1:31:25.360 --> 1:31:26.439 mostly all in Paris. 1:31:26.720 --> 1:31:29.639 What are you most excited for in life moving forward? 1:31:31.240 --> 1:31:33.640 I think I've been kids at some point. Yeah, I 1:31:33.680 --> 1:31:34.719 would love having kids. 1:31:35.000 --> 1:31:36.360 Do you feel like you've learned a lot from your 1:31:36.400 --> 1:31:39.160 own parents that you can yeah, either either what to. 1:31:39.200 --> 1:31:40.759 Do or what not to exactly exactly. 1:31:40.880 --> 1:31:44.439 Yeah, Okay, how how often do you talk to your parents? 1:31:44.880 --> 1:31:47.960 Almost like every two days or every day? 1:31:48.600 --> 1:31:48.760 Then? 1:31:48.960 --> 1:31:51.360 Yeah, I can't be honest, Like, all right, you sat 1:31:51.439 --> 1:31:52.960 down and you were like, you were like, you have 1:31:53.080 --> 1:31:54.640 to be, you must be. 1:31:54.840 --> 1:31:58.040 It has been like six years now that I'm working on. 1:31:58.120 --> 1:32:00.639 This, so well, I guess well the way you said 1:32:00.720 --> 1:32:02.000 when you said that, and you were like you might 1:32:02.439 --> 1:32:05.280 man can only rely on himself. And it's like you 1:32:05.320 --> 1:32:07.760 have a you have a great community, you're very you 1:32:07.800 --> 1:32:10.280 have a wife, you have your pet, friends all around 1:32:10.320 --> 1:32:12.400 you have you know, you don't seem to rely be 1:32:12.560 --> 1:32:13.920 I mean you know what I mean, But like you 1:32:14.000 --> 1:32:15.599 seem like you have a lot of people in your life. 1:32:15.680 --> 1:32:15.880 Yeah. 1:32:15.920 --> 1:32:20.280 With bundies that I fixed, it's better now. 1:32:20.520 --> 1:32:24.080 Yeah, Yeah, that's great, man cool, Thank you so much. 1:32:24.160 --> 1:32:24.400 Of course. 1:32:24.439 --> 1:32:27.280 What's your name again, yugi Yi? Thank you very much 1:32:27.320 --> 1:32:28.799 for sitting down and talking to man. I really appreciate. 1:32:28.840 --> 1:32:29.800 Is there anything else you want to say to the 1:32:29.840 --> 1:32:33.200 people before we go? Julie is the best rapper in Frience? 1:32:33.280 --> 1:32:38.320 Who is jew Jewel? Nice to meet you man later. Well, folks, 1:32:38.800 --> 1:32:42.360 I think that was it. I think those were our interviews. 1:32:41.960 --> 1:32:42.400 For the day. 1:32:42.479 --> 1:32:44.439 I think they were pretty good. Who do we talk to? 1:32:45.479 --> 1:32:50.320 We talked to the Yo Yo man. We talked to 1:32:50.760 --> 1:32:55.719 the elementary school principal. We talked to the opera singer lady. 1:32:56.040 --> 1:32:59.880 We talked to uh the general, the other the gentleman 1:33:00.040 --> 1:33:03.280 at the bike talking about getting sober as well. That 1:33:03.439 --> 1:33:05.840 was a good That was a good group of people. 1:33:06.479 --> 1:33:08.800 This was a good episode. I hope you guys enjoyed it. 1:33:09.720 --> 1:33:12.439 I'm debating, Oh this guy left his cookies. I'm I'm 1:33:12.520 --> 1:33:15.280 debating if I should eat a stranger's half eaten cookies. 1:33:15.360 --> 1:33:18.040 I'm not above it. I'm really not above it. I'm 1:33:18.160 --> 1:33:20.679 really really not above it. I'm I might be above 1:33:20.760 --> 1:33:24.439 doing it on camera, but i'm i'm I'm I'm not 1:33:24.560 --> 1:33:26.880 above it. So I might do it. So anyway, thank 1:33:26.880 --> 1:33:30.639 you guys for listening to this. If you're tomorrow, I'm 1:33:30.680 --> 1:33:34.679 gonna drop my uh my, uh well, if you're watching 1:33:34.720 --> 1:33:36.720 this on YouTube, it's already on here. But if you're 1:33:36.840 --> 1:33:39.960 listening to this on the podcast tomorrow, I'm gonna drop 1:33:40.160 --> 1:33:44.320 my Tijuana dance battle video on Spotify, so you should 1:33:44.400 --> 1:33:48.479 check that out. But anyway, uh that's it. What another 1:33:48.520 --> 1:33:52.240 beautiful day of talking to people. Say safe, say words 1:33:52.280 --> 1:33:55.040 in the comments. If you enjoyed these conversations. I want 1:33:55.040 --> 1:33:57.360 to hear what people have to say. I sit down 1:33:57.439 --> 1:34:00.679 here for for for a bunch of time talking to people. 1:34:00.720 --> 1:34:02.479 I want to hear what people have to say. I'm 1:34:02.520 --> 1:34:05.800 curious if you guys have thoughts about the conversations. You 1:34:05.840 --> 1:34:08.760 have thoughts about live your life. Give a like, give 1:34:08.760 --> 1:34:12.880 a comment, give a subscribe, Spotify comments, YouTube comments, whatever. Okay, 1:34:12.960 --> 1:34:15.559 that's it. I don't have anything else to say. I'm 1:34:15.600 --> 1:34:17.160 a get go, I'm getting out of here. I'm gonna 1:34:17.160 --> 1:34:19.200 go play my switch to and eat a stranger's half 1:34:19.240 --> 1:34:23.400 eating cookie and try not to think. All right, gak 1:34:23.479 --> 1:34:26.799 bless thank you very much, see you around the universe.