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Speaker 1: Hi everyone, I'm Rachel's Zoe, and you are listening to

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Speaker 1: Works for Us, where we talk to people about what

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Speaker 1: works for them in their relationships and of course what doesn't. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So today I'm on my own today because I just

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Speaker 1: wanted to have this person all to myself and have

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Speaker 1: a one on one conversation with today's guest. She is,

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Speaker 1: by far in a way, one of the strongest, most

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Speaker 1: resilient people, and such a positive light, and I am

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Speaker 1: so honored to have her joining me today. She's a

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Speaker 1: former Roquette, which is so cool and a broadway to answer,

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Speaker 1: I mean even cooler. An incredible celebrity trainer and current

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Speaker 1: co host on The Talk. Her book Live Your Life,

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Speaker 1: My Story of Loving and Losing Nick Cardero, comes out

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Speaker 1: today June fifteenth, and I personally cannot wait to read it.

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Speaker 1: I am, of course talking about the one the only

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Speaker 1: Amanda Clutes. Thank you for coming on Works for Us.

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Speaker 1: I have so many things to say that I feel

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Speaker 1: like I could just like explode or implode, but I

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Speaker 1: wanted first to start just by acknowledging you know you've

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Speaker 1: been through so much. As most of our listeners know,

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Speaker 1: Amanda very tragically lost her husband early on in COVID

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Speaker 1: Nick Cardero, the brilliant, wonderful Nick Cardero, to the plague

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Speaker 1: of coronavirus last summer. And I've said to you offline online,

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Speaker 1: just how you know, I don't There's nothing I can say,

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Speaker 1: but just how how sorry I am. But really the

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Speaker 1: light that you have continued to shine for your son

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Speaker 1: and everybody else around you, but then also being so

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Speaker 1: openly vulnerable about your process and going through it and

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Speaker 1: how many people that has most definitely helped this year,

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Speaker 1: and I think even way beyond this year as you shared,

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Speaker 1: I mean, you and Nick shared the most magical, beautiful

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Speaker 1: love story, and your son Elvis is just I just

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Speaker 1: want to jump through social media. I cannot wait to

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Speaker 1: like hug him in real life. He's going to think

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Speaker 1: I'm like a total weirdo, like who is this for you?

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Speaker 1: But I do want to honor just the magic and

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Speaker 1: beauty of your relationship and what you shared together and

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Speaker 1: just learn a little bit more about sort of your love,

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Speaker 1: your story. But I think you know the intention of

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Speaker 1: works for us is really trying to find what made

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Speaker 1: it work for you and um, what the magic was,

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Speaker 1: what's the secret sauce because I find that, you know,

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Speaker 1: Roger and I, the thing we hear most often with

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Speaker 1: people is marriage is really hard. It's it's just really hard,

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Speaker 1: and like, yes, of course, but not and that And

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Speaker 1: the thing is, like what Roger and I always say

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Speaker 1: is I think that's what you're missing because everything in

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Speaker 1: life is really hard. You know, like work is hard,

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Speaker 1: career is hard. You're challenged with things all day every day,

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Speaker 1: your kids and this and that and the stressors and

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Speaker 1: the guilt and this and that. But your marriage, in

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Speaker 1: my opinion, and it doesn't mean that's the right one

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Speaker 1: should be your safe, easy place where you can be

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Speaker 1: you and relax and shut down. And that's the person

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Speaker 1: that like you know that that should be the easy

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Speaker 1: part in my opinion. I don't know. I just want

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Speaker 1: to hear about you, and I want to hear a

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Speaker 1: little bit about you know, how you met and your

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Speaker 1: love story. Really yeah, well, Rachel, thank you for having

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Speaker 1: me first and foremost, my God, my pleasure. When I

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Speaker 1: saw that you and Roger were doing this, I was like,

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Speaker 1: I think, I commented, I was like, wait, well you

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Speaker 1: can I can I be on the podcast that for

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Speaker 1: all the love and hate we have with social media.

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Speaker 1: Those are like the joys, those are the things. And

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Speaker 1: like I said, I feel like we got to like

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Speaker 1: connect and yes, you know in a way that certainly

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Speaker 1: this year, I don't think anyone else could connect any

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Speaker 1: other way, you know, absolutely, one hundred percent. And you're right,

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Speaker 1: it's it's it is a light. Yeah, it's a blessing

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Speaker 1: or silver lining, but it is a light. And and

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Speaker 1: thank you, you know, thank you for reaching out to

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Speaker 1: me and say helping me and supporting me and advice

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Speaker 1: and just always offering if there's anything I can do,

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Speaker 1: and for sending me your amazing boxes and everything that

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Speaker 1: you do, anything that'll keep the help to keep that

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Speaker 1: smile going every day, because look how big it is,

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Speaker 1: Like how big smiles. I don't think I could smile

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Speaker 1: that big, but I wanted to keep going. And I

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Speaker 1: want your light to keep shining, you know, so thank you.

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Speaker 1: You know what's funny, Um, I don't. I mean, there's

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Speaker 1: so many ways to answer the question you asked, and

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Speaker 1: I'm sure we'll like keep answering it as we go along,

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Speaker 1: but I'm going through right now a different part of

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Speaker 1: my relationship with Nick. Um. You know, Nick and I

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Speaker 1: we could fight. We were like oil and water a

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Speaker 1: lot of times, so we would have like these very

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Speaker 1: intense fights. That he was Latino, so he could really

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Speaker 1: get into it. And I'm learning now. I learned this,

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Speaker 1: I think through his hospital stay and then in writing

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Speaker 1: the book especially, I became so grateful for our relationship,

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Speaker 1: you know, like you when I think it's because when

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Speaker 1: you lose something, then you can look back on it

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Speaker 1: with a different light, right, And then now that he's gone,

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Speaker 1: I I, you know, I never I don't know what

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Speaker 1: I believed necessarily about. You know, listen, I love the

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Speaker 1: idea of God in heaven, and so I always just thought,

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Speaker 1: like the people we love are up in heaven and

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Speaker 1: they're untouchable. But I've been having so many crazy things

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Speaker 1: happened to me since Nick has passed, where I feel

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Speaker 1: his presence around me. So now I'm kind of going

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Speaker 1: through this whole like relationship with Nick when he's not

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Speaker 1: even here, which is also very interesting, which I think

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Speaker 1: is pretty extra ordinary because yeah, because listen, I say

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Speaker 1: it to my kids now, because my kids, you know,

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Speaker 1: they both struggle with the They were very close and

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Speaker 1: and at night, you know, I tuck them in every

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Speaker 1: night especially this year. I try never to miss it.

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Speaker 1: And every night they say, I don't ever want you

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Speaker 1: to be gone, and they can't wrap their head they

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Speaker 1: cannot wrap their heads around it. And my little one

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Speaker 1: wants to be a scientist for the sole purpose that

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Speaker 1: he can invent something that like keeps me alive forever

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Speaker 1: and so and you know, and it it guts me.

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Speaker 1: And I understand it because I used to say that

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Speaker 1: to my parents. I still look at my parents at

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Speaker 1: eighty and eighty four and I, you know, and I

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Speaker 1: and I I think the thing is I say to them,

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Speaker 1: and I believe it when I say it to them.

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Speaker 1: I will always be your mom, I will always be

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Speaker 1: watching you, I will always be with you. And I

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Speaker 1: think there is something where that is true. And I

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Speaker 1: think because you know, clearly Nick left this planet way

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Speaker 1: too soon, and I feel like he had more to do.

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Speaker 1: So I feel like he's just sitting there next to you,

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Speaker 1: you know, wanting you to just keep smiling and living

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Speaker 1: your best life. You know. Yeah, No, I totally feel

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Speaker 1: like that he's like my guardian angel, watching over Elvis

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Speaker 1: and I And you know, there's so many people that

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Speaker 1: have come to me and have messages from him that

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Speaker 1: to me that are just like it's it's it's nick like,

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Speaker 1: it's just crazy. So I don't know, there's this a

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Speaker 1: whole other relationship that I'm having with him now. It's

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Speaker 1: like we had our dating relationship, our marriage relationship, our

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Speaker 1: relationship as new parents, and then our relationship now. It's

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Speaker 1: so it's really kind of multifaceted. I think fighting, I

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Speaker 1: think we should talk about fighting for a second, because

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Speaker 1: I think it's important and very healthy to really fight

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Speaker 1: with your with your other half. I mean, I'm thirty

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Speaker 1: years in and anyone who's close to us will tell

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Speaker 1: you we're like Lucy and Ricky and I will literally

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Speaker 1: in the same five minutes, like we'll talk about what

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Speaker 1: we want to eat for dinner, and I will literally

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Speaker 1: scream at him and tell him to leave the room.

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Speaker 1: Like I'll just be like I can't. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: don't really scream because I don't have a temper. He

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Speaker 1: is definitely more of a temper, but he doesn't seem

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Speaker 1: like all I know he does though, and I'm really like,

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Speaker 1: I'm weirdly so much more patient and even since the

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Speaker 1: very beginning of our relationship, it would be like if

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Speaker 1: he started on one of his like and he'll just

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Speaker 1: say like, god knows what. And I'm just like, when

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Speaker 1: you're done, whenever you're done, I'll talk to you about this,

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Speaker 1: or I'll just walk out of the room. And what

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Speaker 1: is that? Due to people who have that, they're like, bah,

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Speaker 1: but wait, I'm like, I can't, but I think. But

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Speaker 1: it's weird because then it's almost like ten minutes later,

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Speaker 1: twenty minutes later, it's like, okay, so what are we

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Speaker 1: going to do this weekend? You know? And I think listen,

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Speaker 1: I think at the end of the day, you have

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Speaker 1: to have that person, whether it's your best friend, you're sibling,

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Speaker 1: your your your work husband, your work wife, whatever, whoever

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Speaker 1: it is, you have to have that person that you

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Speaker 1: can kind of yell at and make up. You're like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: get it out and make up. But that doesn't mean,

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Speaker 1: especially when it applies to the love of your life,

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Speaker 1: that doesn't mean you don't love them anymore or less.

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Speaker 1: It just means you don't necessarily go at things in

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Speaker 1: the same way. But I did speak to this woman

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Speaker 1: who we had on the podcast the other day who's

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Speaker 1: so brilliant, named Lori Gottlieb, and she's a relationship expert,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, oh my god, so you're actually

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Speaker 1: by training. I'm not by training. But everything she said

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Speaker 1: was so profound and so fascinating and so so really

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Speaker 1: stuck with me. But it was if you're the same

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Speaker 1: at the core, that's what matters. If you share the

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Speaker 1: same values, if you share the same principles and outlook

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Speaker 1: on life, life and how you think your child should

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Speaker 1: be raised, those are the things that matter. The other

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Speaker 1: stuff that like pisses him off or pisses you off,

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Speaker 1: or you don't like to do or you love movies

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Speaker 1: but he hates me, that's okay, you know, right, tell

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Speaker 1: me a little bit about your like your story, Like,

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Speaker 1: was it love at first sight? Did you just like

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Speaker 1: see him and you were like that's the guy, or

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Speaker 1: were you just like now, I have no time for

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Speaker 1: this right now, but I kind of like him or

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Speaker 1: another it was you know, it was it was, it was.

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Speaker 1: It was a very interesting situation. So I was actually

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Speaker 1: married when we first met. I've had nine loves and friends,

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Speaker 1: I've had nine life. Um, so I was married when

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Speaker 1: I met Nick, and we were doing the reading of

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Speaker 1: The Bullets over Broadway, which is the Broadway show we

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Speaker 1: met in and by the way, yeah, this Broadway show,

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Speaker 1: you know, was planned. It was slated to be the

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Speaker 1: next huge Broadway show. Woody Allen, Susan Stroman, you know,

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Speaker 1: his big movie finally turned into a musical. Um, Zach

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Speaker 1: Braff is the lead character. I mean like it was

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Speaker 1: just like, yeah, it was just like slated to be

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Speaker 1: the big thing. So when we got this job, you know,

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Speaker 1: as a Broadway actor dancer, Um, you start planning your life.

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Speaker 1: You're like, oh my god, I'm gonna have I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: have three years of a paycheck, and I'm gonna I'll

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Speaker 1: have babies with my husband and oh my, this is amazing,

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Speaker 1: and you know all these things and so um, to

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Speaker 1: make this long story short, my ex husband is on

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Speaker 1: tour with a book of Mormon. Our marriage is falling

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Speaker 1: apart because of distance and a lot of different things

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Speaker 1: that it doesn't matter. And so I'm in New York.

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Speaker 1: He's on tour, and I start rehearsing for Bullets over Broadway.

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Speaker 1: On Broadway, when you're doing a Broadway show, it's like

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Speaker 1: it's super intense. Friends say in Rent and Wicked and yeah,

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Speaker 1: you have no intense thing. Ever, Yeah, and your your

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Speaker 1: cast becomes your family. I mean, it's like your best

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Speaker 1: friends and your family, and it's so glamorous back there.

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Speaker 1: I just want to point out, No, I've been backstage

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Speaker 1: quite a bit working with clients back there. It is

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Speaker 1: not very different than movie life. I'm just saying, yes, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean, if you're if you're Liza Manella, you might

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Speaker 1: have a glamorous but that's about it. She even still

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Speaker 1: I don't know that she does, but it definitely has

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Speaker 1: sequence and feathers everywhere. Absolutely. As a female CEO and

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Speaker 1: I have to say, as someone who really never does

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Speaker 1: I have to tell you that I have done the

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Speaker 1: Sakar meal plan several times and it was really just

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Speaker 1: so that I could actually feel more healthy. It was

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Speaker 1: Sakara dot com slash Though. So anyways, we were doing

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Speaker 1: this show my marriage is falling apart, and Nick and

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Speaker 1: I start becoming good friends, and he and I become

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Speaker 1: like just we talk. I like end up confiding in

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Speaker 1: him a lot in how my marriage is falling apart,

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Speaker 1: And really, you know, I thought he was handsome. Of course,

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Speaker 1: you know, six foot five on five eleven, so it

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Speaker 1: was like, you're five eleven, yeah, five, yes, Oh my goodness, Rachel.

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Speaker 1: For the first time in my life, I could wear

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Speaker 1: a gown with like a huge heel and he's still

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Speaker 1: towered over me. I cannot believe your five eleven and

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Speaker 1: I cannot believe he's six to five. That is okay.

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Speaker 1: So here's the thing. Elvis is gonna be real tall.

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Speaker 1: This is yeah, He's gonna be for sure like six

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Speaker 1: foot five. So you don't know this about me sidebar,

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Speaker 1: but I have really bad height envy. I'm like five,

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Speaker 1: I'm like five four. If I'm lying lying, I'm lying

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Speaker 1: a bit. But okay, you get to wear very fun shoots.

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Speaker 1: So yeah. So I was also very very charmed, you know,

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Speaker 1: by bye Nick. But we were just friends and then, uh,

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Speaker 1: you know, my marriage falls apart and Nick and I

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Speaker 1: end up kind of secretly dating. Now we had to

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Speaker 1: secretly date because no one really knew I was going

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Speaker 1: through a divorce and we were doing this Broadway show

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Speaker 1: and he didn't want it. He didn't want it to

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Speaker 1: look like he was, you know, sleeping around or hanging

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Speaker 1: out with a married woman, so it was this kind

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Speaker 1: of scandalous thing. We kind of kept very quiet for

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Speaker 1: a little while, and then once the show closed and

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Speaker 1: once everybody kind of understood that my marriage was over,

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Speaker 1: then we kind of started, you know, publicly being out

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Speaker 1: and uh but you know, I'll tell you what. We

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Speaker 1: We had ups and downs. We broke up three times

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Speaker 1: before we finally like gotten together. Nick and I were

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Speaker 1: completely different. He was, um, a very you know, had

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Speaker 1: lived a hard life. He's again six foot five. As

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Speaker 1: a Broadway actor, you don't get a lot of roles

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Speaker 1: in film. Meeting Mann is probably the only other tall

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Speaker 1: that I can think of, but I mean, right, but

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Speaker 1: he's Hugh Jackman. Yeah. So yeah, So Nick had a

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Speaker 1: lot of um, you know, he was renting a friend's

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Speaker 1: studio apartment, didn't really have anything to his name. I

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Speaker 1: was going through We were a mess, you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean. And I probably connected you by the way, Yes, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: a lot of connection there, but also a lot of

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Speaker 1: you know, I was, yes, and I was going through

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Speaker 1: a you know when you when you get a divorce,

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Speaker 1: so you kind of go through this whole like I

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Speaker 1: have to take control of my life situation, which I

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Speaker 1: very much wanted to. And anyways, we found solace in

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Speaker 1: each other, broke up off and on three times. The

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Speaker 1: last time I thought for sure it was done. You know,

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Speaker 1: we we we said goodbye in a very loving way.

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Speaker 1: I love you, I love you, but this just isn't

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Speaker 1: going to work out. And then his father was dying

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Speaker 1: and through that process that really changed Nick and he

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Speaker 1: came back and uh, kind of from that situation. He's

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Speaker 1: from Canada, so he was with his dad in Canada.

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Speaker 1: Came back from Canada after his dad was like really

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Speaker 1: really sick and said, you know, I now know that

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Speaker 1: I have to have you in my life and I

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Speaker 1: want I want you back. And and when was that?

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Speaker 1: When was that? Amanda? Like like yet, like time wise,

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Speaker 1: where were we then, like two thousand, that would have

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Speaker 1: been twenty fifteen. This is a long time ago. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but this was like summer. This wasn't like three years.

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Speaker 1: This was like yeah, this was summer of twenty fifteen.

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Speaker 1: And then yeah, and then and then after and then

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Speaker 1: after he did that. Once we got back together, we

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Speaker 1: were pretty much together. We moved in together, and then

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Speaker 1: we got engaged and we got married in less than

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Speaker 1: six months and stayed in New York, stayed in New

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Speaker 1: York and stayed to New York. Yeah, yeah, yeah, stayed

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Speaker 1: in New York and had Elvis in New York. But

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Speaker 1: then Nick got very very sick of New York City

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Speaker 1: and just wanted to move to LA And so that's

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Speaker 1: what inspired the move to La Wow. Yeow. And that

365
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:34,720
Speaker 1: was in twenty nineteen, right, that was in twenty nineteen. Yes, yeah,

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Speaker 1: we moved to LA. So we were barely here before

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Speaker 1: before everything happened, and we were living with Zach Braff

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Speaker 1: because he was so gracious about sweet letting us stay

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Speaker 1: in his guesthouse and so he had us on his

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Speaker 1: compound and we had a whole big family affair. Yeah. God,

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Speaker 1: I know, I've known him for a long time. He's wonderful,

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Speaker 1: but I do know he was so close with Nick. Yes, yeah,

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Speaker 1: but well, okay, so then you came out here, and

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Speaker 1: then I you know, listen, I think life just has

375
00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:09,920
Speaker 1: a very odd way of just throwing you things when

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00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:13,919
Speaker 1: you don't expect it, right, And I think, you know,

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00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:18,880
Speaker 1: I think what's great about your story is that, you know,

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Speaker 1: as we've been talking to a lot of amazing people

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Speaker 1: and couples, you know, It's funny. Some people were like,

380
00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:27,639
Speaker 1: we saw each other and we knew and did and

381
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:31,200
Speaker 1: then we spoke to a few people that were like, no,

382
00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:34,400
Speaker 1: no, no no, no, we like broke up. I had a boyfriend,

383
00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:36,879
Speaker 1: I had a girlfriend. This is the worst day ever.

384
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:40,119
Speaker 1: I was like, never. And it's I think it's really

385
00:21:40,359 --> 00:21:44,119
Speaker 1: important for people to I've met quite a lot of

386
00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:48,239
Speaker 1: people out here in LA that over my time living here,

387
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:51,359
Speaker 1: which is now almost twenty years, that I meet and

388
00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:53,600
Speaker 1: we have this whole friendship in this whole life and

389
00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:55,600
Speaker 1: then they're like, oh, yeah, did you not know I

390
00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:58,240
Speaker 1: was married for like five years before I even like

391
00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,400
Speaker 1: met you or met my husband or whatever. And I'm

392
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:04,120
Speaker 1: like what. And what I say to that is sort

393
00:22:04,160 --> 00:22:07,440
Speaker 1: of like, you know, I think that there's an idea

394
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:09,960
Speaker 1: of marriage how we grow up sometimes right of that

395
00:22:10,119 --> 00:22:11,960
Speaker 1: sort of like we're supposed to get married, when we

396
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:13,680
Speaker 1: get in love, when we fall in love at a

397
00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:15,399
Speaker 1: certain age, we're to be married. We're supposed to a

398
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Speaker 1: kid by this time and that time. And I think

399
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:20,960
Speaker 1: now we're living in a totally different time, right at

400
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,199
Speaker 1: least in certain places, you know what I mean. I

401
00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:26,200
Speaker 1: remember when I went into my doctor to say Okay,

402
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:28,240
Speaker 1: I know I'm like a hundred, but I think I'm

403
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 1: ready to have kids. And she was like, Rachel, You're

404
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:33,199
Speaker 1: nowhere close to a hundred. You're actually like one of

405
00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:36,159
Speaker 1: my youngest patients, like one of my youngest And I

406
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:38,680
Speaker 1: was like, huh, She's like, but we live in LA,

407
00:22:39,119 --> 00:22:41,840
Speaker 1: you know. And it was interesting. And I what that

408
00:22:42,040 --> 00:22:46,639
Speaker 1: told me was I think the game's changing, right, and

409
00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:50,240
Speaker 1: I think the rules are changing. And I think people

410
00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:53,959
Speaker 1: came out of COVID either more in love or divorced

411
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:59,399
Speaker 1: or with a baby. I literally know more people that

412
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:02,919
Speaker 1: are pregnant or have had babies this year. Then you

413
00:23:03,280 --> 00:23:06,439
Speaker 1: write you two, you must too because you're young. It

414
00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:09,560
Speaker 1: was the perfect time to have a baby. Ke looking

415
00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:13,960
Speaker 1: at Roger going I want otherwise so good. I mean

416
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:16,680
Speaker 1: you're hiding away. You don't have to do anything or

417
00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,960
Speaker 1: go anywhere. You can wear sweatpants every single day, and

418
00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:22,600
Speaker 1: then you emerge with your baby as the world is reopening.

419
00:23:22,640 --> 00:23:26,639
Speaker 1: It's like it's the brilliant, craziest, craziest thing. So do

420
00:23:26,680 --> 00:23:29,560
Speaker 1: you love it here now? Like? Do you like do

421
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:32,080
Speaker 1: you feel at home here in La? Like this is

422
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:35,080
Speaker 1: home for do? Yeah? No, I do? And I didn't.

423
00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:37,480
Speaker 1: When we first moved here, I was like cursing Nick,

424
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:40,360
Speaker 1: And you know, Elvis was three months and we had

425
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:43,439
Speaker 1: moved from and it's all scary. Our apartment was on

426
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:47,560
Speaker 1: sixty fifth and Central Park West. That's wow, wow, that's

427
00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:49,960
Speaker 1: like where I do the talk Shaw, that's right there.

428
00:23:50,119 --> 00:23:53,960
Speaker 1: We were so lucky and my parents lived across the hall.

429
00:23:54,080 --> 00:23:56,760
Speaker 1: My dad would knock on the door with hot pancakes

430
00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:59,440
Speaker 1: in the morning after Elvis was born, like this is

431
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 1: where we live. And then Nick was like, I want

432
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:05,760
Speaker 1: to move us to LA and I was like, h so, yeah,

433
00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:08,560
Speaker 1: when we first got here, I was not happy, but

434
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:11,520
Speaker 1: but yes, now listen, I'm a sunshine girl, so I

435
00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:15,360
Speaker 1: love I love the sunshine, and you know I love

436
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:19,199
Speaker 1: to say um. And this goes with relationships, you know.

437
00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:22,440
Speaker 1: Nick and I fought about moving to California for a year,

438
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,080
Speaker 1: even though I've always wanted to live in LA. Even

439
00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:28,640
Speaker 1: though I love the weather and I love everything about

440
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:30,800
Speaker 1: Los Angeles. I fought him on it because I was

441
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,800
Speaker 1: just like, I'm a New Yorker nineteen years and my

442
00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:37,120
Speaker 1: family was there. But sometimes you have to do things

443
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:39,600
Speaker 1: for your partner, you know what I mean. Like I

444
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:43,480
Speaker 1: knew that if he didn't do this, Yeah, he had

445
00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:45,359
Speaker 1: to do it. He wasn't going to shut up until

446
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:47,480
Speaker 1: we did it. We had to try it out, and

447
00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:51,679
Speaker 1: I knew if it failed. New York doesn't change. Always

448
00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:53,800
Speaker 1: be there, you know what I mean. It's what my

449
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:56,360
Speaker 1: parents said to me when we always go back. Yeah,

450
00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 1: after they said, it's not going anywhere, turn around and

451
00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:01,120
Speaker 1: come back if you don't like it. You don't realize

452
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:03,760
Speaker 1: that when you're moving, you feel like you're just like

453
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:07,919
Speaker 1: leaving your whole life behind. And this is terrifying. But

454
00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:10,800
Speaker 1: what you don't realize is like you can pack your things,

455
00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:14,840
Speaker 1: turn around and come back back. You know, It's so true.

456
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,359
Speaker 1: So you have a life here now, and you have

457
00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:20,960
Speaker 1: such an incredible career. I feel like your smile and

458
00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:25,720
Speaker 1: your positivity, and I feel like you're part motivational speaker

459
00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:29,520
Speaker 1: without trying to be, and like you're just this really

460
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:34,440
Speaker 1: bright ray of sunshine for so many people. And I think,

461
00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:37,439
Speaker 1: you know, I want you to know that, and I

462
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:39,959
Speaker 1: want you to know that you radiate a light and

463
00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:43,639
Speaker 1: a strength, and I think by sharing vulnerability. And I

464
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:46,640
Speaker 1: have very mixed feelings about social media. I always have,

465
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,480
Speaker 1: you know, people think I'm good at it. I don't

466
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:52,040
Speaker 1: think I'm very good at it. I think I share,

467
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,040
Speaker 1: but I hide, but I share, But I you know,

468
00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:57,440
Speaker 1: I go back and forth, and I think that you

469
00:25:57,480 --> 00:26:03,080
Speaker 1: have shared your experience. I think it's been so honest,

470
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:06,320
Speaker 1: and I think what it has really done for people,

471
00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:09,960
Speaker 1: you know, you know, emotionally and obviously this is mental

472
00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:13,880
Speaker 1: health awareness. Like listen, I think every month from here

473
00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:17,480
Speaker 1: on out is mental health awareness. Let's just forget. But

474
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,280
Speaker 1: I do think that, you know, I think the fact

475
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:22,800
Speaker 1: that one day we're watching you launch a new workout,

476
00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:25,080
Speaker 1: and then the next day I'll see a post where

477
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:27,480
Speaker 1: you're like, Okay, today, I'm really sad today, I'm having

478
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:30,120
Speaker 1: a different feeling today. This is the grief I'm going through.

479
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:35,000
Speaker 1: So many people are like, thank you, thank you, because

480
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:39,480
Speaker 1: if people are just watching you, and look, you have

481
00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:42,280
Speaker 1: to be honest, right, If you're having every great day forever,

482
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:45,399
Speaker 1: that's great. But I think to share the hard ones

483
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:49,320
Speaker 1: is so real. You are being you. I don't think

484
00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 1: you're trying to do any of this. You're probably just

485
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:55,240
Speaker 1: fighting a lot behind the scenes. You're showing us the

486
00:26:55,640 --> 00:26:58,919
Speaker 1: good and the bad. But I do think on the positive,

487
00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:04,439
Speaker 1: you're just on like going up. I really do. And

488
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 1: you're you know, you're such a good mama too, and

489
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:09,679
Speaker 1: thank god you have that little baby angel next to

490
00:27:09,680 --> 00:27:11,399
Speaker 1: you all the time. My god, thank god I have

491
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 1: that baby angel, you know, I mean I he is

492
00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:18,720
Speaker 1: makes me so happy, keeps me so happy. And you

493
00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 1: know what, Rachel, like, the thing is is like what

494
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,960
Speaker 1: you just said, thank you, but like that that is life.

495
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:27,560
Speaker 1: And it's so weird that you can literally be and

496
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:30,159
Speaker 1: I'm sure and I know you can relate to this.

497
00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:34,119
Speaker 1: You can have like this amazing day, right, like this

498
00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:37,359
Speaker 1: great day, and then you can get in the car

499
00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:41,040
Speaker 1: and cry something and bawl your eyes out right yes,

500
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:43,359
Speaker 1: and then and then walk through your door and your

501
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 1: little boy comes up to you, and then you're just

502
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:48,760
Speaker 1: like goes away. It's everything goes away. And so it's

503
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:52,840
Speaker 1: it's so weird because it is. And then add the

504
00:27:52,920 --> 00:27:57,240
Speaker 1: layer of brief on it is is bunkers because those things,

505
00:27:57,280 --> 00:27:59,640
Speaker 1: I mean, especially driving around town. You know, a drive

506
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:02,199
Speaker 1: by something and you know Nick and I had a

507
00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:05,080
Speaker 1: date there or something, yeah, or a fight there or

508
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:07,760
Speaker 1: you know, or we held hands there, and you just

509
00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:10,320
Speaker 1: start bawling. And then and then somebody calls you and

510
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,800
Speaker 1: you're like, oh hi, but like it's a weird thing

511
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,280
Speaker 1: because a couple of years ago, we went through this

512
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:18,760
Speaker 1: really hard situation with work and da dada da, and

513
00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:21,960
Speaker 1: you know, like my family and our friends whatever would

514
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,120
Speaker 1: be like, how are you just like smiling all the time.

515
00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:26,080
Speaker 1: It was like an employee just did something really bad,

516
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:29,239
Speaker 1: you know, blah blah blah, and I saw, you know,

517
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 1: really whatever. But it was it was interesting because Roger

518
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,600
Speaker 1: really crumbled for a bit and then I would just

519
00:28:35,680 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 1: keep like, you know, just going. And that that's why

520
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:41,920
Speaker 1: I literally one of my biggest mantras about women is

521
00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:44,880
Speaker 1: we just don't know how strong we are until we

522
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:47,680
Speaker 1: have to be that strong. And that doesn't mean you

523
00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:51,080
Speaker 1: don't cry, that doesn't mean you don't break. But what

524
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:54,840
Speaker 1: I believe to your point, every time I went through

525
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:57,880
Speaker 1: that door, every time one of my boys came out

526
00:28:57,920 --> 00:29:00,000
Speaker 1: to you, it was like mommy, you know, let's for dinner, mommy,

527
00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:03,160
Speaker 1: let's watch a movie, mommy, let's not go. Everything went away,

528
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:05,680
Speaker 1: and even if it wasn't a way, for that moment,

529
00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:07,800
Speaker 1: it's a way. And for that moment, your mommy, and

530
00:29:07,800 --> 00:29:10,880
Speaker 1: for that moment, you smile and everything feels better and

531
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:14,120
Speaker 1: so I think, whatever those lights are in people's lives,

532
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:16,440
Speaker 1: you just need to find them. And that's okay, right,

533
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:18,920
Speaker 1: And I do think that you're going to go through,

534
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:24,280
Speaker 1: you know, all these different moments of emotion and experiences,

535
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:27,240
Speaker 1: and Nick, no matter what, he's with you, right and

536
00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:32,680
Speaker 1: with Elvis for life. But I think that I think

537
00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 1: what's so interesting? So I love the story of Nick's

538
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 1: song live your Life right, because it sounds like that

539
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:46,280
Speaker 1: was kind of meant to be sort of your love story. Now,

540
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:50,200
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Well in a way, yes, you know.

541
00:29:50,320 --> 00:29:54,600
Speaker 1: I mean we we wrote it together one night. I mean,

542
00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:57,680
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say we wrote it together if he's right

543
00:29:57,720 --> 00:29:59,960
Speaker 1: here next to me going like, how dare you say

544
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:04,479
Speaker 1: that right now? But I did have the lyrics. I

545
00:30:04,520 --> 00:30:06,360
Speaker 1: just want you to know I'm here for it. I

546
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:10,760
Speaker 1: totally I helped him with the lyrics and Hudson because

547
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:12,760
Speaker 1: he had no lyrics to this song, and I all

548
00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:15,840
Speaker 1: I ever heard was the beat and him like ad living,

549
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,600
Speaker 1: you know, and I was like, we need to put

550
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:20,920
Speaker 1: some lyrics to this song. So we did one night

551
00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:24,240
Speaker 1: in Hudson, New York. And so I like to say

552
00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:26,960
Speaker 1: that I had something to do with it, but Uh, no,

553
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,840
Speaker 1: it is. It's a breakup song. It is about like

554
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:33,520
Speaker 1: two lovers who can't make it work and separate, and

555
00:30:33,680 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 1: he's basically saying, go live your life and if the

556
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:38,360
Speaker 1: stars a line, we'll come back together. Okay. So it

557
00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 1: is in a way, Uh yes, our you didn't do

558
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:45,240
Speaker 1: that story, you did? Yeah, we did, We absolutely did.

559
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:48,040
Speaker 1: You're right. So, um, Ironically, I don't know if I've

560
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 1: ever thought of it that way, because then during COVID

561
00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:54,400
Speaker 1: it became such like a anthem of live your life,

562
00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:57,840
Speaker 1: you know, like we don't know when our last day is,

563
00:30:57,920 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 1: we can't take things for granted, and like you gotta

564
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:03,440
Speaker 1: live your life. So it's cool though, it's cool how

565
00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:05,680
Speaker 1: it has so many meetings and so and so many

566
00:31:05,720 --> 00:31:09,440
Speaker 1: interpretations and um, and you know, I'm just grateful that

567
00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:12,800
Speaker 1: so many people caught onto it because like, honestly, he

568
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:16,240
Speaker 1: died a rock star because of that, Like his song

569
00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 1: was being played on the radio and all over the world.

570
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:22,000
Speaker 1: Like I know he knows this, but I wish I

571
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:24,880
Speaker 1: could have had that moment where I would have been like, honey,

572
00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:27,080
Speaker 1: just so you know, and he would have been like,

573
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 1: what the But you know, he knows, I know he

574
00:31:33,920 --> 00:31:36,719
Speaker 1: knows maybe Elvis is gonna sing it? Does he sing it?

575
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:41,680
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I would you know? As soon as

576
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 1: I know, it gets it gets even better. Rachel. He

577
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:48,360
Speaker 1: was conceived in New Orleans, born in New York City,

578
00:31:48,440 --> 00:31:52,760
Speaker 1: raised in Laurel Canyon. I mean, I raise like his

579
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:55,680
Speaker 1: music in his boat. Yeah, I'm like, if if this

580
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:59,360
Speaker 1: doesn't happen, I've alread I already see this happening. I

581
00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:03,320
Speaker 1: already see this happening. Listen from the two of you.

582
00:32:03,600 --> 00:32:05,920
Speaker 1: I mean, it's sort of like there's going to be

583
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:08,840
Speaker 1: this tall, beautiful being with an old soul in this

584
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:12,560
Speaker 1: beautiful heart, and I think talent, whether he chooses to

585
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:15,240
Speaker 1: acknowledge it or not, it's going to be there. He's

586
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:17,440
Speaker 1: gonna have dance moves, He's going to have a voice.

587
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:21,920
Speaker 1: She's going to have all the creativity, which she'll be

588
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:24,600
Speaker 1: like an engineer, and by the way, he very well

589
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:27,040
Speaker 1: might be. It's sort of like why people say to me,

590
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:30,600
Speaker 1: like I don't understand why you don't have a daughter,

591
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:36,360
Speaker 1: And I'm like, she'd probably hate fashion, like she'd hate clothes.

592
00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:39,280
Speaker 1: She would literally like I just this is what I

593
00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:41,760
Speaker 1: tell myself to kind of like, you know, get it,

594
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:44,080
Speaker 1: and then I just borrow my friend's kids all the time.

595
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:50,280
Speaker 1: Here's the thing, not all vitamins are created equal. Some

596
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:53,520
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597
00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:56,400
Speaker 1: and some are full of sugar and synthetic fillers. And

598
00:32:56,440 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 1: it's really hard to make yourself take a vitamin when

599
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:03,160
Speaker 1: that's the case. Not with Ritual. We deserve to know

600
00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:06,040
Speaker 1: what we're putting in our bodies and why, especially when

601
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Speaker 1: it comes to something we take every single day. Ritual

602
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Speaker 1: is made traceable, which means you'll always know what nutrients

603
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:15,960
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604
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605
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:22,920
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606
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607
00:33:27,400 --> 00:33:31,200
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608
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:34,840
Speaker 1: life stages. I can definitely say that the fresh tasting

609
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610
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Speaker 1: twice a day because I don't know about you, but

611
00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:43,200
Speaker 1: I hate those big multi vitamins that taste terrible and

612
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:45,960
Speaker 1: are very hard to swallow, and it actually makes me

613
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:48,920
Speaker 1: not want to take it because ritual is a vitamin,

614
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:51,280
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615
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:54,280
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616
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617
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621
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:19,520
Speaker 1: So I started my career as a stylist and working

622
00:34:19,560 --> 00:34:22,759
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623
00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:26,719
Speaker 1: my own companies, I'm still always looking for ways to

624
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:30,799
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625
00:34:30,880 --> 00:34:35,640
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626
00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:39,279
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627
00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:43,640
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628
00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:45,920
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629
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630
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631
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632
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633
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634
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635
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639
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640
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641
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643
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648
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650
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656
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664
00:36:50,200 --> 00:36:54,520
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665
00:36:57,440 --> 00:36:59,880
Speaker 1: Another friend of mine and we've connected even more deeply

666
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:04,040
Speaker 1: this year, um, over the last year is Vanessa Brian

667
00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:07,959
Speaker 1: as well. And you know, I think the thing is

668
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:11,600
Speaker 1: is that love stories are super interesting because they are

669
00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:16,360
Speaker 1: love stories, and they are all different and everyone has

670
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:19,000
Speaker 1: like listen, it didn't look like this, it didn't happen

671
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:21,160
Speaker 1: like this, and everyone's story is different, and that's why

672
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:24,319
Speaker 1: it's called a story. You had a love story, a

673
00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:28,399
Speaker 1: very candid one. Um. You know, obviously I can't even

674
00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:30,800
Speaker 1: wrap my head around. I think the reason I reached

675
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:33,879
Speaker 1: out to you is because I didn't really know you.

676
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:37,279
Speaker 1: I knew I've known Zach for twenty years, and I

677
00:37:37,320 --> 00:37:39,880
Speaker 1: love him, and I know how much he loved loves

678
00:37:39,920 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 1: both of you. But I think I've reached out to

679
00:37:44,640 --> 00:37:49,120
Speaker 1: you because I just I like felt and feel so

680
00:37:49,239 --> 00:37:52,279
Speaker 1: deeply what you're going through in a way that like

681
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:55,400
Speaker 1: it's it's this weird thing, like I immediately just felt

682
00:37:55,400 --> 00:38:00,200
Speaker 1: this responsibility to like not like I better help, but

683
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:02,400
Speaker 1: it was more just like I couldn't not try and

684
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:05,359
Speaker 1: somehow be there for you right and try and help

685
00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:08,200
Speaker 1: you get through it, because I think also just being

686
00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:10,720
Speaker 1: a mom of two young boys and you're having Elvis

687
00:38:10,760 --> 00:38:13,000
Speaker 1: and just going through this, and I just it was

688
00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:16,040
Speaker 1: just sort of like, Okay, what can I do do

689
00:38:16,120 --> 00:38:17,880
Speaker 1: I just keep sending her things? Do it just like,

690
00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:19,799
Speaker 1: keep reaching out to her, I keep checking out hers

691
00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 1: this annoying? Is this? Like you know so? But I

692
00:38:22,719 --> 00:38:26,320
Speaker 1: think I think it would be so helpful to share

693
00:38:26,440 --> 00:38:29,280
Speaker 1: because I think, you know, I personally like I can't

694
00:38:30,040 --> 00:38:32,880
Speaker 1: wrap my head around what this year has been like

695
00:38:33,000 --> 00:38:36,240
Speaker 1: and also just what you see now because now obviously

696
00:38:36,320 --> 00:38:38,040
Speaker 1: we have a vaccine and now we know how to

697
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:42,080
Speaker 1: treat it more or less. But you know, we almost

698
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:44,919
Speaker 1: lost Roger's best friend to COVID as well this year.

699
00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:48,640
Speaker 1: But I guess my question is what would be your

700
00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:52,840
Speaker 1: advice to so many people going through a grieving process,

701
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 1: no matter what they're grieving from. But like, I feel

702
00:38:56,640 --> 00:39:00,440
Speaker 1: like you have been the pillar of strength, as has Vanessa,

703
00:39:00,520 --> 00:39:07,239
Speaker 1: but also showing such um vulnerability and grief and sadness

704
00:39:07,280 --> 00:39:09,640
Speaker 1: when you feel it, and happiness when you don't. And

705
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:12,160
Speaker 1: today's a good day and today's a horrible day and

706
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:14,480
Speaker 1: today was a good and bad day, or you know,

707
00:39:14,600 --> 00:39:20,880
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess what can you share with our listeners, um,

708
00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:24,400
Speaker 1: if anything about any kind of like advice or takeaway

709
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:26,399
Speaker 1: or just anything that you think and how people get

710
00:39:26,440 --> 00:39:31,920
Speaker 1: through a day better that are that are grieving? Yeah, yeah, um,

711
00:39:32,080 --> 00:39:33,799
Speaker 1: you know. I will say a couple of things. The

712
00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:37,160
Speaker 1: first is is that no one's journey is the same.

713
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:41,520
Speaker 1: You know, when I lost Nick, Um, like my friends

714
00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:44,200
Speaker 1: sat me down and told me everything I should do,

715
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:48,640
Speaker 1: you know, right away, And I had probably every book

716
00:39:48,760 --> 00:39:51,480
Speaker 1: on grief sent to me. You need to read this,

717
00:39:52,320 --> 00:39:56,280
Speaker 1: Um days a therapist you should call right away. UM.

718
00:39:56,560 --> 00:40:01,480
Speaker 1: And for a lot of people, um, you know, all

719
00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:03,839
Speaker 1: of those things might help. One of those things might help.

720
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:07,399
Speaker 1: I had to find my own way, and for my

721
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:11,439
Speaker 1: first and foremost it was honestly doing nothing, doing none

722
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:14,799
Speaker 1: of that. Of course, Um, I just started talking to

723
00:40:14,840 --> 00:40:18,160
Speaker 1: a therapist. I just started reading books on grief. And

724
00:40:18,480 --> 00:40:22,200
Speaker 1: we're almost at one year of Nick's anniversary of his passing,

725
00:40:22,320 --> 00:40:27,400
Speaker 1: so um, you know, it's just know that everyone's journey

726
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:30,080
Speaker 1: is the same. I researched the stages of grief like

727
00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:32,319
Speaker 1: the day he passed, and I was like, Okay, this

728
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:34,800
Speaker 1: is my stage that I'm going to be in right away,

729
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:37,799
Speaker 1: you know, googling it and trying to be you know,

730
00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:42,400
Speaker 1: the grief student and yeah. And I was like, okay,

731
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:44,439
Speaker 1: I'm angry now. And then I was like, but I'm

732
00:40:44,440 --> 00:40:48,200
Speaker 1: not angry actually right now. I you know, so I

733
00:40:48,239 --> 00:40:52,840
Speaker 1: think my advice is just to advice. Yeah, no, I

734
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:55,640
Speaker 1: that makes sense that you have to like just be

735
00:40:55,920 --> 00:40:58,239
Speaker 1: in your body, and I don't think because you also

736
00:40:58,280 --> 00:41:02,040
Speaker 1: don't want to have like that self feeling prophecy, like Okay,

737
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:05,160
Speaker 1: next I'm supposed to be really depressed. Next I'm supposed

738
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 1: to like want to cry all the time. Next I'm

739
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,799
Speaker 1: supposed to try and smile, and like, I don't think

740
00:41:09,880 --> 00:41:13,359
Speaker 1: you can do that. And yeah, similar to parenting I'm sure,

741
00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:16,479
Speaker 1: I mean not similar, but in the way that people

742
00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:17,960
Speaker 1: are like, oh, you have to do this when he's

743
00:41:17,960 --> 00:41:20,040
Speaker 1: too oh, take him out of the crib when he's this,

744
00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:22,520
Speaker 1: or right, you can't do that. I don't do. You

745
00:41:22,560 --> 00:41:26,040
Speaker 1: have to listen to you right, right, yes, exactly. And

746
00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:29,680
Speaker 1: the thing is is like I still am finding my way.

747
00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,560
Speaker 1: You know, I don't know the right answers. It's such

748
00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:36,840
Speaker 1: a rollercoaster. I mean, there's weeks that are great, there's

749
00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:40,279
Speaker 1: days that are just terrible still, and I don't think

750
00:41:40,320 --> 00:41:42,480
Speaker 1: that's ever going to go away. And a lot of

751
00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:45,440
Speaker 1: times people will say as time goes on it gets easier,

752
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,160
Speaker 1: to be honest, I haven't found that either. I feel

753
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,400
Speaker 1: like it's harder. I see Elvis and I look at

754
00:41:50,480 --> 00:41:52,719
Speaker 1: him and I'm like, what would your dad be doing

755
00:41:52,719 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 1: with you right now? You know, like y'are he's missing

756
00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:58,160
Speaker 1: this or you know, big things happen and I just

757
00:41:58,200 --> 00:42:01,760
Speaker 1: want to tell I want to tell Nick or um,

758
00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:04,600
Speaker 1: you know, thinking about dating again, and you're just like,

759
00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:08,600
Speaker 1: you know, I don't. I want to date again. I

760
00:42:08,640 --> 00:42:11,000
Speaker 1: want to find somebody in my life for sure, one

761
00:42:11,080 --> 00:42:15,240
Speaker 1: hundred percent. But um, it's hard because it's like you

762
00:42:15,239 --> 00:42:17,759
Speaker 1: you want, you want to date your person. You know,

763
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:22,280
Speaker 1: I want to go to dinner with Nick um. So

764
00:42:22,960 --> 00:42:25,600
Speaker 1: that's hard. It's all very hard, and I don't I

765
00:42:25,640 --> 00:42:29,040
Speaker 1: don't know if um I think my my My best

766
00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:32,800
Speaker 1: piece of advice, uh, other than to not take advice,

767
00:42:33,680 --> 00:42:35,840
Speaker 1: is to try to try to talk it out. I

768
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:41,080
Speaker 1: think honestly, because I've been so vulnerable and even through

769
00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:43,840
Speaker 1: the process of everything that happened with Nick, I didn't

770
00:42:43,840 --> 00:42:46,839
Speaker 1: realize that I by doing what I was doing every day,

771
00:42:46,880 --> 00:42:49,719
Speaker 1: going online, sharing everything every day, it was as if

772
00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:52,440
Speaker 1: I was going to therapy because I was just talking

773
00:42:52,440 --> 00:42:55,440
Speaker 1: it out and I didn't even realize it until my girlfriend,

774
00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:58,799
Speaker 1: who's studying to be a therapist, m called me after

775
00:42:58,880 --> 00:43:01,360
Speaker 1: he passed and she goes, you know, step one. A

776
00:43:01,440 --> 00:43:03,759
Speaker 1: therapist would say, you've got to just like get it out,

777
00:43:03,840 --> 00:43:06,600
Speaker 1: like write it down, or you've got to talk to somebody.

778
00:43:06,640 --> 00:43:08,799
Speaker 1: She goes, But you've done that. You've been talking about

779
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:10,799
Speaker 1: it since day one, so I think you're in a

780
00:43:10,840 --> 00:43:14,319
Speaker 1: completely different place than what you normally would be if

781
00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 1: you would have kept this all to yourself. So I

782
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:19,400
Speaker 1: would say, try try to talk it out, because I

783
00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:22,839
Speaker 1: think when you talk out in life, yes, if you're

784
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:26,479
Speaker 1: thinking something, you know, like if you talk it out,

785
00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:29,000
Speaker 1: sometimes you're like, oh my gosh, why was I thinking that?

786
00:43:29,400 --> 00:43:32,920
Speaker 1: Or or or you manifest it because you've say it,

787
00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:34,879
Speaker 1: you're saying it, you know. I mean, there's so many

788
00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:39,480
Speaker 1: different great benefits of just talking out what you're what's

789
00:43:39,520 --> 00:43:42,799
Speaker 1: in your head total, you know. But I also think

790
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:45,719
Speaker 1: some of the I think I think I agree one

791
00:43:45,719 --> 00:43:48,960
Speaker 1: thousand percent on on everything you said. I think that

792
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:51,399
Speaker 1: I think the first step is take the pressure off

793
00:43:51,440 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 1: of you, right, yes, yes, yeah, and just be and

794
00:43:54,760 --> 00:43:57,719
Speaker 1: just and and try and live your best life you can.

795
00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:00,360
Speaker 1: And I have your moments and let yourself have moments,

796
00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:06,480
Speaker 1: you know. Yeah, yea, what is your if you have one,

797
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:08,840
Speaker 1: you probably have a million, But like, what's your absolute

798
00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:11,680
Speaker 1: favorite memory of you and Neck? I have a couple,

799
00:44:11,760 --> 00:44:15,880
Speaker 1: but the one I'll say is part of our honeymoon.

800
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:18,480
Speaker 1: We went on an epic honeymoon. And now looking back,

801
00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:22,560
Speaker 1: I'm like, God, thank god we did that, Like, thank

802
00:44:22,680 --> 00:44:27,080
Speaker 1: god we did that. Where'd you go? We went to? Uh?

803
00:44:27,120 --> 00:44:29,600
Speaker 1: We went to We started off with a friend's wedding

804
00:44:30,160 --> 00:44:33,720
Speaker 1: in Italy. Then we drove up the Almafi coast, spent

805
00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:36,479
Speaker 1: a week with our friends and copyry my favorite trip

806
00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:40,600
Speaker 1: in the world, the best. Then we flew to Africa.

807
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:43,279
Speaker 1: We spent five days in Cape Town, then flew up

808
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:46,560
Speaker 1: to Kenya and Tanzania and Safari and then went to Bali.

809
00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 1: Oh God, thank god you did that. You should just

810
00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:53,360
Speaker 1: live in that place forever, like you should end up

811
00:44:53,480 --> 00:44:58,760
Speaker 1: that memory as the life. Yeah. God, but those those

812
00:44:58,920 --> 00:45:02,760
Speaker 1: days especially, there were three days we spent in Cape

813
00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:07,719
Speaker 1: Town at this place called Babylone store in and it

814
00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:11,560
Speaker 1: will like I remember holding Nick and being like these

815
00:45:11,600 --> 00:45:15,479
Speaker 1: are like the most perfect days I think I've ever

816
00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:18,279
Speaker 1: spent in my life. And so that that's one of

817
00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:22,200
Speaker 1: my favorite memories. That is absolutely beautiful memory. Like I

818
00:45:22,239 --> 00:45:25,320
Speaker 1: actually I have the visual I have a visual of you,

819
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:27,719
Speaker 1: like an on an elephant or something I don't know,

820
00:45:28,560 --> 00:45:31,560
Speaker 1: or like on some kind of like animal, I don't know,

821
00:45:31,800 --> 00:45:33,920
Speaker 1: I don't know. You guys need to go on Safari. Hi.

822
00:45:34,080 --> 00:45:35,960
Speaker 1: My mom and dad really want to take all of

823
00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:38,480
Speaker 1: us as like a family trip. But then like how

824
00:45:38,520 --> 00:45:40,399
Speaker 1: what happened? They wanted to do it this year because

825
00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:42,560
Speaker 1: they want to see Mike, they want to see their grandchildren,

826
00:45:42,640 --> 00:45:45,760
Speaker 1: like yes, and the boys are at a perfect age,

827
00:45:45,880 --> 00:45:49,839
Speaker 1: like you're you guys. It is. It's magical, Rachel. It's

828
00:45:49,880 --> 00:45:54,520
Speaker 1: life changing, life changing, far, very far. So you have

829
00:45:54,920 --> 00:46:01,120
Speaker 1: so much going on. You are so busy. Okay. You

830
00:46:01,200 --> 00:46:06,160
Speaker 1: have your fitness business empire that I'm just like watching

831
00:46:06,239 --> 00:46:09,120
Speaker 1: explode by the minute. You make me want to work

832
00:46:09,160 --> 00:46:14,520
Speaker 1: out so bad I just have to, Like I just think, like, okay,

833
00:46:14,680 --> 00:46:17,040
Speaker 1: i'd have to get up at four in order to

834
00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:20,520
Speaker 1: do this, and I just like, since my styling days,

835
00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:22,480
Speaker 1: I would like leave for set it for like in

836
00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:25,799
Speaker 1: the total dark, you know, And I was like, I

837
00:46:25,920 --> 00:46:29,600
Speaker 1: promise this summer, this it's going to happen. But you're

838
00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:32,600
Speaker 1: so cute and so energetic and so smiley. I just

839
00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:34,279
Speaker 1: look at them and I'm like, I want to do that.

840
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:36,520
Speaker 1: I want to be here. I want to do that. Okay,

841
00:46:36,520 --> 00:46:39,200
Speaker 1: So if your fitness empire, you're on the Talk, which

842
00:46:39,280 --> 00:46:44,360
Speaker 1: is so great with Elaine, who's so dope. Yeah, she's

843
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:49,600
Speaker 1: so cool. Love her. And then of course your book,

844
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,800
Speaker 1: which I'm so excited about. Tell me about your book.

845
00:46:53,440 --> 00:46:57,880
Speaker 1: So the book comes out today, I'm and you know, Rachel,

846
00:46:58,520 --> 00:47:00,080
Speaker 1: it's so crazy. You know. I wrote it with my

847
00:47:00,160 --> 00:47:04,600
Speaker 1: sister Anna, who was with me during this whole process.

848
00:47:04,600 --> 00:47:07,000
Speaker 1: Thank God for us, and you know, yeah, and we're

849
00:47:07,080 --> 00:47:09,360
Speaker 1: so Anna and I. You know, I have four sisters,

850
00:47:09,400 --> 00:47:12,360
Speaker 1: but Anna and I are are very similar. And four

851
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:16,400
Speaker 1: sisters and a brother. Yes, hold on, you're one of six,

852
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:20,359
Speaker 1: one of Oh no, I'm sorry. I have three sisters,

853
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:25,960
Speaker 1: four girls, one boy. Yes. Yes, I have three friends

854
00:47:25,960 --> 00:47:28,160
Speaker 1: with five kids and they all have four girls and

855
00:47:28,280 --> 00:47:31,960
Speaker 1: one boy. Oh my goshow. Yeah. I look at my

856
00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:35,200
Speaker 1: mom and dad now after having one child, and I'm like, yes,

857
00:47:35,760 --> 00:47:41,719
Speaker 1: you're my hero, hero, and I'm sorry for everything anything

858
00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:45,640
Speaker 1: mean to you ever. So true. We don't do that

859
00:47:45,680 --> 00:47:48,160
Speaker 1: to our parents. Oh my god. Yeah, it's like a

860
00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:52,319
Speaker 1: whole realization, like Dave having a child. We're like, Mom

861
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:56,480
Speaker 1: and Dad, I'm so sorry. Yeah. So we wrote the

862
00:47:56,520 --> 00:48:00,800
Speaker 1: book together. And you know, I never consider myself an author.

863
00:48:00,880 --> 00:48:02,959
Speaker 1: I never thought I would write a book. And when

864
00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:06,640
Speaker 1: HarperCollins reached out to me about writing this story and

865
00:48:06,680 --> 00:48:10,440
Speaker 1: writing it so quickly, I was just kind of I

866
00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:13,759
Speaker 1: think the shock of it all kind of actually worked

867
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:16,680
Speaker 1: in my favor. And you know, I started writing it

868
00:48:17,040 --> 00:48:19,800
Speaker 1: two weeks after Nick passed. I went back to Ohio

869
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:21,959
Speaker 1: with my mom and dad to take some time. After

870
00:48:22,080 --> 00:48:24,120
Speaker 1: Nick passed and I started writing it once I put

871
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:28,240
Speaker 1: Elvis to bed, and I'm so glad I did because

872
00:48:28,360 --> 00:48:31,759
Speaker 1: your therapy. By the way, Yeah, it was so cathartic

873
00:48:31,920 --> 00:48:35,360
Speaker 1: writing these things down. And you know, by the time

874
00:48:36,400 --> 00:48:39,400
Speaker 1: Nick passed, I thought I could have joined the medical

875
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 1: staff at Seater Sinai, you know, I mean I had

876
00:48:43,080 --> 00:48:47,480
Speaker 1: the numbers and the medications and everything so down in

877
00:48:47,520 --> 00:48:50,160
Speaker 1: my memory that like, if I tried to write this

878
00:48:50,200 --> 00:48:53,000
Speaker 1: book today, I wouldn't be able to because there's so

879
00:48:53,080 --> 00:48:56,160
Speaker 1: much detail in this book about COVID, about the dates,

880
00:48:56,280 --> 00:49:00,839
Speaker 1: about the protest, George Floyd happening at this time. Like,

881
00:49:01,280 --> 00:49:05,200
Speaker 1: I mean, the world was upside down and backwards exactly,

882
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:07,480
Speaker 1: and who knows if we will ever. I hope we

883
00:49:07,600 --> 00:49:10,000
Speaker 1: never live in that kind of world again. But for

884
00:49:10,120 --> 00:49:15,640
Speaker 1: those months, the world was bonkers, And um, I don't

885
00:49:15,640 --> 00:49:20,439
Speaker 1: think I could have recreated what's in the book now

886
00:49:20,480 --> 00:49:23,360
Speaker 1: if I tried to, because it was just so fresh,

887
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:27,640
Speaker 1: it was so right there. Um. So I'm very you know,

888
00:49:27,640 --> 00:49:30,600
Speaker 1: it's it's weird to say, um, I'm proud of it.

889
00:49:30,719 --> 00:49:32,440
Speaker 1: I mean, it's not weird to say I am very

890
00:49:32,480 --> 00:49:35,160
Speaker 1: proud of this book. I'm proud of Anna and I but, um,

891
00:49:35,200 --> 00:49:37,799
Speaker 1: you know, obviously it's just as it's a tough Yeah,

892
00:49:37,840 --> 00:49:40,239
Speaker 1: it was. It was so tough, the toughest thing we've

893
00:49:40,239 --> 00:49:43,840
Speaker 1: ever done. We cried every single time we wrote. You know, listen,

894
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:46,640
Speaker 1: I think to your point, I think that's why, you know,

895
00:49:46,719 --> 00:49:49,799
Speaker 1: we have journals, That's why we had diaries, that's why,

896
00:49:50,040 --> 00:49:51,719
Speaker 1: you know, growing up. I think it's you know, I'm

897
00:49:51,800 --> 00:49:54,480
Speaker 1: I'm now having my kids keep a journal, and they're like,

898
00:49:54,880 --> 00:49:57,480
Speaker 1: what if my handwriting's messy? What if? I'm like no, no, no.

899
00:49:58,040 --> 00:50:01,000
Speaker 1: This is literally to put what's in your mind on

900
00:50:01,080 --> 00:50:04,879
Speaker 1: that day. You know, like whatever it is, good or bad,

901
00:50:05,080 --> 00:50:07,080
Speaker 1: you're having a broth day, you're having a happy day.

902
00:50:07,120 --> 00:50:11,320
Speaker 1: And I think for you, this book, it's your diary

903
00:50:11,640 --> 00:50:15,640
Speaker 1: of this year and that time. And I think that

904
00:50:15,719 --> 00:50:21,839
Speaker 1: people will read it and walk away with wow, and

905
00:50:22,840 --> 00:50:26,040
Speaker 1: this is what was going on in this life. And

906
00:50:26,080 --> 00:50:28,439
Speaker 1: I think, you know, my parents, like I said, they're

907
00:50:28,480 --> 00:50:30,440
Speaker 1: eighty and eighty four. I don't know about yours, but

908
00:50:30,680 --> 00:50:33,839
Speaker 1: I mean mine are. They've lived through a lot, you know,

909
00:50:34,080 --> 00:50:38,200
Speaker 1: and this is they have. You know, They're like, we

910
00:50:38,280 --> 00:50:41,480
Speaker 1: have not lived through anything like this. There is nothing

911
00:50:41,960 --> 00:50:45,400
Speaker 1: in any life like this. So yeah, you know, and

912
00:50:45,480 --> 00:50:49,040
Speaker 1: it will forever change us, change our relationships, change how

913
00:50:49,080 --> 00:50:51,919
Speaker 1: we treat people, change how we think of things. Yes,

914
00:50:52,080 --> 00:50:54,480
Speaker 1: I mean it's Yeah. It was for the first time

915
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,960
Speaker 1: everyone in the world was put on the same platform. Yeah,

916
00:50:58,000 --> 00:51:01,840
Speaker 1: I mean it's crazy. Literally. Yeah, Now what is next

917
00:51:01,840 --> 00:51:04,719
Speaker 1: for you? I don't even know if you're a room

918
00:51:04,800 --> 00:51:09,360
Speaker 1: for something else. But um what, I hope the vacation

919
00:51:09,760 --> 00:51:13,799
Speaker 1: are just like giving yourself, you know, yes, right til

920
00:51:13,840 --> 00:51:19,400
Speaker 1: I'm going back to Africa. Yes, Anna and I, Um so,

921
00:51:19,440 --> 00:51:21,960
Speaker 1: I have a month of August off from the talk.

922
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:25,640
Speaker 1: We go on a summer hiatus. Anna and I are

923
00:51:25,960 --> 00:51:34,000
Speaker 1: with Elvis taking the little Man. Yeah, all going to Africa. Wow, Yeah,

924
00:51:32,080 --> 00:51:37,000
Speaker 1: that I need. I need a little break, you know. Yes,

925
00:51:37,160 --> 00:51:40,280
Speaker 1: I would say I haven't. You know, I haven't given

926
00:51:40,320 --> 00:51:43,879
Speaker 1: myself a good one. Um. But you know, as a

927
00:51:43,880 --> 00:51:46,480
Speaker 1: as a mom, as a working mom and someone who

928
00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:48,600
Speaker 1: I love to work, you know, I mean I do.

929
00:51:48,680 --> 00:51:51,200
Speaker 1: I do enjoy working. It makes me feel good, it

930
00:51:51,239 --> 00:51:55,440
Speaker 1: makes me feel like I'm doing something. And you know,

931
00:51:55,880 --> 00:51:58,960
Speaker 1: obviously the pressure of feeling like I want to support

932
00:51:59,000 --> 00:52:01,520
Speaker 1: Elvis and give him everything in the world that he

933
00:52:01,560 --> 00:52:05,640
Speaker 1: deserves to have. So but but I'm very much looking

934
00:52:05,640 --> 00:52:10,240
Speaker 1: forward to time off and being away and having um,

935
00:52:10,680 --> 00:52:13,520
Speaker 1: you know that that time. So that's kind of that's

936
00:52:13,560 --> 00:52:16,799
Speaker 1: kind of what I'm looking as as as next But

937
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:20,480
Speaker 1: there's lots in the plans. I think that's amazing. And

938
00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:24,280
Speaker 1: as someone who is so my sister is my best

939
00:52:24,280 --> 00:52:26,400
Speaker 1: friend in life, and I think the fact that you

940
00:52:26,520 --> 00:52:30,440
Speaker 1: have so many of them is so beautiful because I

941
00:52:30,480 --> 00:52:33,759
Speaker 1: just think, like, I don't know, I'm just I'm so

942
00:52:33,840 --> 00:52:38,320
Speaker 1: happy that you have that that magic because yeah, because

943
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:40,960
Speaker 1: I think like being able to kind of go away

944
00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:44,080
Speaker 1: and you know, just take a break with Elvis and

945
00:52:44,640 --> 00:52:48,480
Speaker 1: your sisters, I mean your sister. I mean that that's

946
00:52:48,520 --> 00:52:50,600
Speaker 1: such a gift. And I think that goes back to

947
00:52:50,640 --> 00:52:54,080
Speaker 1: the whole like relationship thing. It's like that relationship is

948
00:52:54,239 --> 00:52:57,000
Speaker 1: like nothing else, right, I mean, I know, isn't a

949
00:52:57,080 --> 00:53:01,799
Speaker 1: sister relationship just it's the best really really really is

950
00:53:02,160 --> 00:53:04,720
Speaker 1: because it's it's better than a best friend, it's better

951
00:53:04,760 --> 00:53:06,680
Speaker 1: than anything. And it's that thing where like if you

952
00:53:06,680 --> 00:53:09,279
Speaker 1: don't feel like talking, you don't have to. You know,

953
00:53:09,360 --> 00:53:11,640
Speaker 1: if you feel like crying, you can, If you feel

954
00:53:11,640 --> 00:53:13,400
Speaker 1: like yelling at someone, like you can just be like

955
00:53:13,400 --> 00:53:15,319
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I need to yell you right now. There

956
00:53:15,400 --> 00:53:17,720
Speaker 1: are so there. Oh yeah, no, there were so many

957
00:53:17,800 --> 00:53:20,120
Speaker 1: days that you know, Anna was living with me when

958
00:53:20,160 --> 00:53:22,400
Speaker 1: Nick was in the hospital as my brother, but then

959
00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:24,160
Speaker 1: my brother had to go back to Sancisco. Was just

960
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:31,120
Speaker 1: me and Anna abzacts guesthouse still and great place to

961
00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:34,759
Speaker 1: shock out. Yeah, but you know she would. We would

962
00:53:34,800 --> 00:53:37,920
Speaker 1: have our led face masks on or ice, rolling our

963
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:41,760
Speaker 1: tears away, drinking wine and like just trying to survive,

964
00:53:41,920 --> 00:53:46,400
Speaker 1: you know, really just to survive, and watching Gilmore Girls.

965
00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:48,880
Speaker 1: So we'd pass out on the couch. I mean, you know,

966
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:51,280
Speaker 1: like the things that yes, you can do with their sister,

967
00:53:51,480 --> 00:53:56,040
Speaker 1: that relationship that just doesn't ever bring just get stronger.

968
00:53:56,200 --> 00:53:58,840
Speaker 1: Yeah exactly. Yeah, and I feel like as you get older,

969
00:53:58,840 --> 00:54:02,799
Speaker 1: it gets deeper because he lean on it even more. Right. Yeah,

970
00:54:02,840 --> 00:54:06,240
Speaker 1: oh my gosh. Yeah. No. She arrives June first to start,

971
00:54:07,440 --> 00:54:10,080
Speaker 1: or she arrived June first. I'm sorry to you know,

972
00:54:10,239 --> 00:54:12,000
Speaker 1: be with me for this whole book to her and

973
00:54:12,080 --> 00:54:16,360
Speaker 1: launch and everything. So it's been fun having her here. Amazing. Well,

974
00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:21,160
Speaker 1: I am so excited about this book. I suggest that

975
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:25,960
Speaker 1: everyone get it now. I think it is something everybody

976
00:54:26,040 --> 00:54:31,240
Speaker 1: needs to read and you know. Also, I think everyone

977
00:54:31,960 --> 00:54:34,560
Speaker 1: can relate to on some level you know what I

978
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:37,880
Speaker 1: mean or or will or parts of it, and I

979
00:54:38,160 --> 00:54:43,160
Speaker 1: it's pretty extraordinary. So um, Amanda, I am so happy

980
00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:45,680
Speaker 1: to have you on. I'm so happy we got to

981
00:54:45,719 --> 00:54:49,120
Speaker 1: have girl talk because you know, I kick Roger off

982
00:54:49,160 --> 00:54:51,560
Speaker 1: once in a while because if it's like just a

983
00:54:51,640 --> 00:54:56,640
Speaker 1: woman to woman thing, you know, I just um, I

984
00:54:56,760 --> 00:54:59,719
Speaker 1: love you. I don't even like I can't wait to

985
00:54:59,800 --> 00:55:03,040
Speaker 1: like hug you in real life. I really am excited

986
00:55:03,160 --> 00:55:06,040
Speaker 1: you cute little boys. You're such a great mom. By

987
00:55:06,040 --> 00:55:08,480
Speaker 1: the way, I love following you on social because you're

988
00:55:08,480 --> 00:55:10,880
Speaker 1: such a great mom. You can tell those little boys

989
00:55:10,920 --> 00:55:14,160
Speaker 1: just love you to pieces. Thank you. And as a

990
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:16,719
Speaker 1: mom with a boy, I look up to you and

991
00:55:17,120 --> 00:55:18,880
Speaker 1: what you do with those little boys. I'm gonna steal

992
00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:22,479
Speaker 1: that journal idea that you wrote. It's really they're really

993
00:55:22,520 --> 00:55:25,120
Speaker 1: excited by it. And I think as soon as you know,

994
00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:28,080
Speaker 1: even with Elvis, you could start young because even before

995
00:55:28,080 --> 00:55:30,120
Speaker 1: he can write, he can talk. You can do like

996
00:55:30,200 --> 00:55:35,319
Speaker 1: an video a voice a voice journal now, so that's

997
00:55:35,360 --> 00:55:37,440
Speaker 1: even fun for them and they could say like I

998
00:55:37,520 --> 00:55:39,480
Speaker 1: was mad at this boy today or this boy at

999
00:55:39,520 --> 00:55:42,120
Speaker 1: the park through something at me, but you know what

1000
00:55:42,120 --> 00:55:43,960
Speaker 1: I mean, it just kind of helps them, you know,

1001
00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:48,280
Speaker 1: it's really yeah, you too. I started an email address

1002
00:55:48,360 --> 00:55:50,319
Speaker 1: for him and I write him emails and then one

1003
00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:52,319
Speaker 1: day I'll give him the password and me can open

1004
00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:53,839
Speaker 1: up it. So that would be such a good thing

1005
00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:57,000
Speaker 1: to send these old things to his email. Yes, yeah,

1006
00:55:57,040 --> 00:55:59,480
Speaker 1: well listen, I am here for you, day or night,

1007
00:55:59,640 --> 00:56:02,960
Speaker 1: not on works for us now, just good. But I

1008
00:56:03,000 --> 00:56:05,399
Speaker 1: want you to have the best summer and I want

1009
00:56:05,440 --> 00:56:08,520
Speaker 1: you to keep working your magic, spreading your fairy dust

1010
00:56:08,560 --> 00:56:11,680
Speaker 1: in that big east to west like New York to California.

1011
00:56:11,760 --> 00:56:15,279
Speaker 1: Smile that nobody can see like I can right now,

1012
00:56:15,360 --> 00:56:21,359
Speaker 1: but she literally smiles so big. Thank you, so love

1013
00:56:21,360 --> 00:56:24,000
Speaker 1: you madly. Thank you for being of this was so

1014
00:56:24,040 --> 00:56:28,319
Speaker 1: fun and kissing beautiful little baby angel Elvis. Thank you.

1015
00:56:28,440 --> 00:56:31,520
Speaker 1: It's so nice to be with you today, so fun,

1016
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:38,239
Speaker 1: so excited about the buck. Thank you, Bye, Rachel. I

1017
00:56:38,239 --> 00:56:41,560
Speaker 1: don't know about you, guys, but that was really one

1018
00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:46,520
Speaker 1: of my absolute favorite interviews. I think Amanda is a

1019
00:56:46,760 --> 00:56:51,120
Speaker 1: pillar of strength and positivity and bravery and courage and

1020
00:56:51,600 --> 00:56:56,200
Speaker 1: really just a very magical woman trying to be her

1021
00:56:56,239 --> 00:57:00,400
Speaker 1: best self and be the best mom and keep shining

1022
00:57:00,880 --> 00:57:05,560
Speaker 1: while still grieving so hard. And I just learned so much.

1023
00:57:05,719 --> 00:57:08,440
Speaker 1: I hope you did as well. That was a really

1024
00:57:08,520 --> 00:57:11,680
Speaker 1: incredible conversation with an incredible woman, so I feel very

1025
00:57:11,760 --> 00:57:15,400
Speaker 1: honored to have spoken to her. She's just a beautiful soul.

1026
00:57:16,440 --> 00:57:19,040
Speaker 1: So I hope you enjoyed this one. I hope you

1027
00:57:19,080 --> 00:57:21,200
Speaker 1: took away from it. I hope you learned. I hope

1028
00:57:21,920 --> 00:57:24,160
Speaker 1: I hope it made you think even more deeply about

1029
00:57:24,200 --> 00:57:27,600
Speaker 1: what this year was for so many people in the

1030
00:57:27,720 --> 00:57:32,320
Speaker 1: world and continues to be around the world, people grieving

1031
00:57:32,800 --> 00:57:37,560
Speaker 1: for loved ones that they've lost in COVID. So I

1032
00:57:37,640 --> 00:57:42,840
Speaker 1: want to mention you know, I do highlights and lowlights,

1033
00:57:43,480 --> 00:57:47,400
Speaker 1: typically when Roger's with me, but I think clearly what

1034
00:57:47,440 --> 00:57:50,280
Speaker 1: I'm going to say is my highlight this week is

1035
00:57:50,360 --> 00:57:55,480
Speaker 1: really just trying to appreciate the gift of life and

1036
00:57:55,560 --> 00:57:59,760
Speaker 1: being alive and treating every day like a great one,

1037
00:58:00,120 --> 00:58:03,040
Speaker 1: facing it with a big smile, and looking at your

1038
00:58:03,120 --> 00:58:06,640
Speaker 1: kids or your husband just a little extra, hug them

1039
00:58:06,640 --> 00:58:10,760
Speaker 1: a little extra, and really appreciate the good things because

1040
00:58:10,760 --> 00:58:13,240
Speaker 1: you just don't know, You just don't know how fragile

1041
00:58:13,240 --> 00:58:16,360
Speaker 1: life is until you know how fragile life is. So

1042
00:58:16,560 --> 00:58:19,040
Speaker 1: that would be my highlight, I guess, and my low light.

1043
00:58:20,160 --> 00:58:24,000
Speaker 1: My low light thinking about all of the others like

1044
00:58:24,280 --> 00:58:30,360
Speaker 1: Amanda who lost a loved one in COVID and the

1045
00:58:30,400 --> 00:58:35,280
Speaker 1: grieving and what they've gone through this year, and most

1046
00:58:35,320 --> 00:58:39,800
Speaker 1: of them alone. So I think we should just take

1047
00:58:39,840 --> 00:58:43,400
Speaker 1: this one to sort of really think about this year

1048
00:58:43,640 --> 00:58:47,800
Speaker 1: for so many if not directly you someone close to

1049
00:58:47,840 --> 00:58:50,400
Speaker 1: you or people that you've never met before, but just

1050
00:58:50,440 --> 00:58:54,760
Speaker 1: to give an extra you know, appreciation, I think, and

1051
00:58:54,800 --> 00:58:59,520
Speaker 1: just empathy for people going through what Amanda's going through.

1052
00:59:03,160 --> 00:59:06,160
Speaker 1: If you like what you've heard so far on Works

1053
00:59:06,160 --> 00:59:09,280
Speaker 1: for Us, please make sure you're subscribed on Apple Podcasts

1054
00:59:09,320 --> 00:59:11,479
Speaker 1: and give us a rating and a review, a really

1055
00:59:11,480 --> 00:59:14,880
Speaker 1: good one, please, it really does help us. Keep listening

1056
00:59:14,880 --> 00:59:17,160
Speaker 1: to Works for Us. Tell us if you love it,

1057
00:59:17,640 --> 00:59:20,680
Speaker 1: also tell us if you don't, but please keep listening.

1058
00:59:20,720 --> 00:59:23,680
Speaker 1: We love having you, and of course check us out

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00:59:23,760 --> 00:59:28,000
Speaker 1: and follow us on our Instagram on atworks dot four

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00:59:28,560 --> 00:59:35,720
Speaker 1: dot us. That's atworks dot four dots at works dot

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00:59:35,840 --> 00:59:39,440
Speaker 1: fo r dot us. We notice that all of you

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00:59:39,720 --> 00:59:43,240
Speaker 1: dedicated listeners have been sharing your own relationship stories in

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00:59:43,280 --> 00:59:45,760
Speaker 1: the comments of our Instagram and honestly, we love it

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00:59:46,080 --> 00:59:49,040
Speaker 1: so much. They're so fun to read, and they are

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00:59:49,200 --> 00:59:51,640
Speaker 1: such great stories. We wanted to give you all a

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00:59:51,720 --> 00:59:53,680
Speaker 1: chance to share your stories in a way that we

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00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:56,960
Speaker 1: could feature them on the show. We are so excited

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00:59:57,000 --> 01:00:00,440
Speaker 1: to announce that there is now a Works for Us

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01:00:00,600 --> 01:00:02,720
Speaker 1: phone line that you can call to leave us a

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01:00:02,760 --> 01:00:06,000
Speaker 1: message with your very own relationship stories. You can also

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01:00:06,240 --> 01:00:09,400
Speaker 1: ask us for relationship advice. Although I can't stress enough

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01:00:09,400 --> 01:00:13,040
Speaker 1: that we are not experts, like really not experts, but

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01:00:13,080 --> 01:00:16,440
Speaker 1: you know, kind of, but we will absolutely take your

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01:00:16,480 --> 01:00:19,160
Speaker 1: questions and answer them to the best of our actual

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01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:23,440
Speaker 1: unprofessional abilities. So if you want to share your story

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01:00:23,720 --> 01:00:26,520
Speaker 1: or ask us a question, give us a call at

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01:00:26,600 --> 01:00:31,040
Speaker 1: six five seven five four nine two two five one.

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01:00:31,320 --> 01:00:35,200
Speaker 1: That's six five seven five four nine two two five one.

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01:00:35,240 --> 01:00:38,200
Speaker 1: You can also find all of our contact info on

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Speaker 1: our Instagram at works dot four dot us.