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Speaker 1: All right, guys, welcome back to a another new episode

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Speaker 1: of You Need Therapy Podcast. My name is kat I

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Speaker 1: am the host, and we have part two of kind

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Speaker 1: of debunking these words that have been overused or oversimplified,

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Speaker 1: or over generalized or just gotten the wrong idea in

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Speaker 1: common pop culture when it comes to mental health with

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Speaker 1: my friend Tara. She's back, welcome back. Thanks. Now. This

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Speaker 1: would be the one to three fifth time still longest

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Speaker 1: return or the most frequent returning guests. And we have

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Speaker 1: a couple more things that we want to talk about.

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Speaker 1: We might not again get to all of them, and

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Speaker 1: if we don't, then filp Real Part three and a

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Speaker 1: Part four, because this is gonna be something that continues

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Speaker 1: to show up. And I was just telling Tara actually

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Speaker 1: before we started recording that my hope and talking about

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Speaker 1: this and the reason I'm talking about this isn't really

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Speaker 1: to like make everybody stop doing what is wrong, because

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Speaker 1: I don't think we have the ability to do that.

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Speaker 1: But what we are going to do is empower some

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Speaker 1: people to do what is right or to identify what

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Speaker 1: is right for them. So that's really my hope and

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Speaker 1: all of this because we can't control all of the

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Speaker 1: people in the world, nor would we what I want

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Speaker 1: that responsibility. The last time terror is here, we talked

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Speaker 1: about and if you haven't listened to that episode, I

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Speaker 1: would actually really recommend go listen to that one because

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Speaker 1: we might talk about in the beginning more things that

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Speaker 1: might be helpful in this conversation. Go listen to that

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Speaker 1: one and then come back to this one. You're gonna

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Speaker 1: want to listen to both of them anyway, Okay, So

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Speaker 1: once you listen to that, then you'll know that last

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Speaker 1: time she was here, we talked about what abuse really

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Speaker 1: is in some words that might help describe your experience

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Speaker 1: that might not be abuse, and then the difference between

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Speaker 1: a band of men and being left and what that means.

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Speaker 1: And then today we're going to start with honestly, this

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Speaker 1: might be the most common thing health word. We're going

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Speaker 1: to talk about self care. What it really is, what

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Speaker 1: we think it is, why we even as mental health professionals,

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Speaker 1: support it. Do you remember the first time that you

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Speaker 1: ever heard the word self care? Do you have that experience?

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Speaker 1: I have no idea. My memory does not work well,

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Speaker 1: especially like that. Well, the reason I guess remember is

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Speaker 1: because it was to me like, oh, I don't really

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Speaker 1: need that. When I heard about it, it was when

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Speaker 1: we learned about it in school and grad school, and

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Speaker 1: it was like one of our foundations class and our

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Speaker 1: our instructor was talking to us about self care and

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Speaker 1: as as mental health professionals, why we need to practice

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Speaker 1: self care. Yeah, it was it was about us. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it was so much. That's how I first learned about it.

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Speaker 1: Was like, you've got to do your self care if

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Speaker 1: you're going to be a helping professional, or you're going

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Speaker 1: to get burnt out and you're not going to survive.

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Speaker 1: And my thought was, yeah, well, I see why that

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Speaker 1: would fit for other people, but like I'm really fine,

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Speaker 1: Like I think that I'm like mentally strong, and how

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Speaker 1: could I ever get burnt out of doing this job.

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Speaker 1: I've always like, I'm so excited to do this job,

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Speaker 1: and then I started to do this job and I

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Speaker 1: was like, oh, like I get why I need this

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Speaker 1: and why it actually should be a requirement because the

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Speaker 1: job that we have and the responsibility we have is

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Speaker 1: really sacred. And it brings me back to us talking

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Speaker 1: earlier about the therapist that fell asleep so weeks ago,

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Speaker 1: three weeks ago. At this point, um, I had Tony

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Speaker 1: Collier on who talks about her therapist that fell asleep,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, I cannot believe that that you

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Speaker 1: hear those stories, but like you're like and fall asleep,

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Speaker 1: you're exaggerating, but like this therepis really fell asleep on

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Speaker 1: her And so that's that experience, and I'm like, that

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Speaker 1: guy might have been burnt out, like who knows, but

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Speaker 1: we had to take our jobs really seriously and because

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Speaker 1: of that, that's part of the job, even though it

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Speaker 1: might not be in the description that you get when

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Speaker 1: you sign a contract, that like literally is part of

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Speaker 1: the job when you actually become a licensed health professional.

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Speaker 1: And I think that can fit into a lot of

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Speaker 1: jobs for sure. I just know more about this one

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Speaker 1: because that's what I did. So I want to hear

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Speaker 1: from you kind of your experience of how self care

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Speaker 1: is being talked about or kind of floated around in

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Speaker 1: the world and what you see the difference between what

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Speaker 1: is being put out there and what you really know

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Speaker 1: it as. Yeah, there's a couple of things that come

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Speaker 1: to mind. One of them is that it kind of

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Speaker 1: feels like a simple pill that can be thrown at

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Speaker 1: problems like and especially severe mental health problems. It feels

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Speaker 1: like in the popular culture mental health ward, it's like world,

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Speaker 1: it's like you need self care, and it feels like

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Speaker 1: one of those like the catch help catch all, just

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Speaker 1: quick solution to what are usually much bigger problems, like

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Speaker 1: I self cared my way out of depression or I

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Speaker 1: self cared my way out of So that feels like

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Speaker 1: it's over. It's like a really simple solution to things

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Speaker 1: that are much more complex, so that I see happening

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Speaker 1: sometimes and that that feels like we got way more

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Speaker 1: work to do than self care. While of course it's

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Speaker 1: it's it's part of every answer. I think the other

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Speaker 1: and then the other thing that comes to mind is

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Speaker 1: just like the kid, it's kitchy, it's marketable. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think about all of this. The products that are

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Speaker 1: promoted now as like self care tools, even from I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to give specific examples because I don't want

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Speaker 1: to call companies out, but even from like these companies

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Speaker 1: that really look like they're doing a good job of

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Speaker 1: helping people, it's a fat So I'm going to jump

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Speaker 1: on that fat capitalized yeah, which is what happens in

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Speaker 1: this uh and and so then there's that, and then

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Speaker 1: it becomes like all distorted, you know how, and it's

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Speaker 1: not really a pure thing anymore. Once there's an agenda

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Speaker 1: that I'm going to capitalize and profit off of your

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Speaker 1: quote unquote mental health, your mental wellness, then I think

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Speaker 1: there's just people throwing it on whatever they did. But

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Speaker 1: it wants fun that day, like you know, um, you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, I'm out, you know, doing a beer

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Speaker 1: crawl hashtag self care uh and and so it just

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Speaker 1: gets it gets thrown around with no real clear definition

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Speaker 1: of what it is. It's like, is it that is

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Speaker 1: it just having fun in whatever way you have fun?

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Speaker 1: Is it something you know that I need to buy

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Speaker 1: products to have in my life? Is it something that

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Speaker 1: is as simple as you know, taking a hot bath.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I think the two things I heard

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Speaker 1: in that is One, because we've thrown it on so

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Speaker 1: many things, it's kind of it has lost the essence

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Speaker 1: of its meaning. And two, it just kind of feels

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Speaker 1: like a tradictory of like it's become this thing that

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Speaker 1: it has too much power. Right, So this bath, this

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Speaker 1: bubble bath is going to solve my depression. It's going

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Speaker 1: to clear it all up if I just do this

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Speaker 1: every day for a week, I should be good to go,

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Speaker 1: and it's like, well, I don't know that that's if

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Speaker 1: that actually was the solution to depression, I would be

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Speaker 1: so upset right now because I would be like I

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Speaker 1: have wasted so much time when there was such a

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Speaker 1: simple solution. And again going back to the conversation we

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Speaker 1: had last time you're here, is everything is so nuanced.

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Speaker 1: It's not that simple. So I want to hear from

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Speaker 1: you and then we'll tease this out of like what

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Speaker 1: to you is self care? Why do we as mental

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Speaker 1: health professionals support it and encourage it? And what could

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Speaker 1: categorize as or be in that category of self care?

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Speaker 1: And do we need to buy any products that you've seen.

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to do promotion for free. They could

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Speaker 1: pay me. And that well, a word that I was

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Speaker 1: thinking of as we were talking about this notion earlier

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Speaker 1: was nourishment. And that can be some of the kind

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Speaker 1: of maintenance area of things that that are simple like

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Speaker 1: do we sleep a certain amount of hours? Do we eat?

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Speaker 1: But also I think it nourishment feels more focused and

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Speaker 1: intent and strategic, like things that you know I may eat,

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Speaker 1: but what do I eat? You know, is it nourishing

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Speaker 1: my body in the ways that my body would be

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Speaker 1: most functional, like with nutrients and all these kinds of things.

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Speaker 1: So I think that can be a way that teases

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Speaker 1: out what is self care, Like how am I nourishing

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Speaker 1: myself and in particular all the like deeper parts of myself,

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Speaker 1: you know, like my spiritual self, my emotional self, my

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Speaker 1: physical self, my relational self, my sexual self. What actually

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Speaker 1: nourishes those things? And that is what I think make

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Speaker 1: it different from person to person. You know, a certain

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Speaker 1: behavior you talked about getting nails done, It feels really

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Speaker 1: nourishing because maybe someone doesn't have a lot of money

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Speaker 1: and they only do that and really really spent like

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Speaker 1: a certain amount of times a year, and they don't

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Speaker 1: get to experience that kind of care to their bodies

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Speaker 1: really readily, and so that feels so nourishing to them,

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Speaker 1: whereas someone else is like, it's a task, it's you know,

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Speaker 1: I do it, and I like, I'm glad that I

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Speaker 1: do it, but it's not really fulfilling like a care

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Speaker 1: of nourishment to myself. So that's one of the first

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Speaker 1: things that I would start to define self cares, Like

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Speaker 1: what am I nourishing. And even that's where it's like,

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Speaker 1: I think things like drinking or happy hours or whatever

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Speaker 1: start to get busted up a little bit. And of

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Speaker 1: course their boats not black or white. It's not never

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Speaker 1: nourishing to do those things. Sometimes it is as a

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Speaker 1: person who does those things. Sometimes it is nourishing to

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Speaker 1: me to have fun, to can neck, to laugh, to

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Speaker 1: be in an environment, to feel looseness. Sometimes that's the

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Speaker 1: nourishment that I actually am in most need of, like

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Speaker 1: a social fun environment. And sometimes it's just another Friday night.

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Speaker 1: Or actually you don't. You're doing those things, but you're

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Speaker 1: going out and drink with your friends, but you don't

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Speaker 1: feel the nourishment. That's right, it does. It feels icky

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Speaker 1: in some way, or it's become monotonous. It's just what

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Speaker 1: people do on Friday night. It's I'm not really getting

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Speaker 1: like fulfillment. I'm avoiding them. Then there's the I'm avoiding

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Speaker 1: emotional issues or I'm using that to cover things up

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Speaker 1: instead of nourish them. When I was thinking as you

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Speaker 1: were saying, that bleeds into this part of self care

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Speaker 1: where we have begun to use the word as a

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Speaker 1: way to justify behaviors. That really don't need to be justified, right.

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Speaker 1: So I might feel guilty about spending a lot of

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Speaker 1: money at the mall one day because I didn't practice

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Speaker 1: good self control when it comes to my finances, and

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Speaker 1: so I say, whatever it was, self care deserved it,

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Speaker 1: when really I then I still feel that guilt though,

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Speaker 1: and then I'm trying to cover it up, right, So

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Speaker 1: it's the whole idea of like suppressing feelings, or maybe

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Speaker 1: I do feel bad about like blacking out at a bar,

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Speaker 1: and the next day I'm like, whatever I deserved tonight,

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Speaker 1: to just let loose that with self care, when really

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Speaker 1: it's like, okay, well, I don't know that we were

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Speaker 1: taught or that I could grab onto the idea that

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Speaker 1: self care and blacking out at a bar could coexist,

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Speaker 1: And so there's some more conversations to be had within that.

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Speaker 1: But I think one of the big things with self

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Speaker 1: care that I think where it's losing that meaning, it's

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Speaker 1: it's actually losing the helpfulness of it isn't what it

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Speaker 1: becomes a justification for avoiding emotions or yeah, or a

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Speaker 1: justification for just doing what you also made me want

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Speaker 1: to do. Yeah, you have to have an excuse for it.

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Speaker 1: Why do I need permission? You know? What's interesting though,

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Speaker 1: as I said, like self care is becoming this justification

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Speaker 1: for emotions. For me, a lot of times, self care

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Speaker 1: is a tool that helps me be able to cope

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Speaker 1: with my emotions better or easier. I might have a

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Speaker 1: really hard experience, or maybe I had I've been doing

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Speaker 1: a lot of let's just in the realm of mental

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Speaker 1: health professionals need self care. Maybe I had a week

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Speaker 1: where I had some really hard sessions. They were good,

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Speaker 1: but they were really hard, and I had to sit

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Speaker 1: with some feelings that were hard to sit with and

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Speaker 1: hear some stories that were hard to sit with. So

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Speaker 1: I engage in self care in order to care for

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Speaker 1: myself so I can continue to do that job. Rather

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Speaker 1: I engage in self care like going on a shopping

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Speaker 1: spree or beene drinking to avoid the difficulty that I

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Speaker 1: felt that week. Aste. Yeah, I think a general self

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Speaker 1: care would in some way feel like a support to

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Speaker 1: ye myself, to whatever I was carrying or to a

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Speaker 1: need that I out. It would feel like it was

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Speaker 1: offering that something. And sometimes rest or break from a

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Speaker 1: hard thing is self care, you know. So you know,

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Speaker 1: if I've been dealing with a really hard family situation,

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Speaker 1: and I need I'm gonna go on vacation to give

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Speaker 1: myself a break because I'm wearing myself out. I'm still

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Speaker 1: not just moving away and never coming back to it.

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Speaker 1: But so there is a dynamic of where rest and

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Speaker 1: breaks from our needed and our self care. But I

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Speaker 1: think it's the intention that you bring to it. Am

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Speaker 1: I doing this with a complete awareness that this is

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Speaker 1: to actually help me continue to manage the situation I'm in,

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Speaker 1: to restore my fuel a little bit on making it

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Speaker 1: through this hard thing that I'm not yet through. Like

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Speaker 1: and and with that, self care is not something that

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Speaker 1: is going to cost me in some way when it

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Speaker 1: comes to really anything. So if I'm going to go

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Speaker 1: out with my friends as kind of a break to

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Speaker 1: having to be in that really hard emotional place all time,

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Speaker 1: because it's really actually is really hard to feel your

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Speaker 1: feelings all the time. So maybe need a little bit

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Speaker 1: of a break. Okay, Well, if I'm we're gonna keep

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Speaker 1: using this example blacking out at a bar, that's costing

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Speaker 1: me a lot. I don't feel good the next day.

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Speaker 1: I might have more shame or guilt. I might have

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Speaker 1: spent a lot of money that I don't have. I

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Speaker 1: might have said things I wish it and say and

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Speaker 1: again the next day, I'm going to feel depleted and

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Speaker 1: less able probably to go and do those things that

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Speaker 1: I needed that break from. So I think that's really

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Speaker 1: important because I talk a lot about how sometimes trashy

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Speaker 1: TV can be self care, Like I used to do this,

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Speaker 1: but I don't, which I guess I can now. I

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Speaker 1: don't have cable, so I thought that I couldn't watch

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Speaker 1: Bravo anymore, but I think I can still watch on

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Speaker 1: Peacock or something anyway. But I used to love The

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Speaker 1: Real Housewives and stuff like that. I don't watched it

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Speaker 1: in years, but a lot of people do that. It's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: just give me a break from like the drama in

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Speaker 1: my life for whatever it is. And yeah, that is

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Speaker 1: a place where you're like actually ignoring your stuff for

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Speaker 1: a second. But at the same time, after you watch

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Speaker 1: that show, I don't think you are feeling a lot

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Speaker 1: of negative consequences. I sometimes tell people go watch something

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Speaker 1: funny tonight after a really hard session. Okay, if your system,

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Speaker 1: because you actually system by letting it have that, you're

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Speaker 1: nurturing your system by letting it have a break versus

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Speaker 1: when you're doing something that actually causes you harm and

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Speaker 1: you're not nurturing your system. Going back to the nurture

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Speaker 1: so important. Okay, So we could keep talking about this,

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Speaker 1: but there's something else I want to talk about today,

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Speaker 1: well have you, which is self care is a term,

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Speaker 1: but we're going to talk about some more clinical terms

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Speaker 1: that now have become very mainstream, which feels weird to say,

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Speaker 1: and so I want to talk about a couple of

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Speaker 1: main ones, and with that, we have a limited time today.

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Speaker 1: So we even said before we started recording this that

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Speaker 1: there are some things in here that we could probably

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Speaker 1: just have a forty five minute episode on and maybe

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Speaker 1: that will happen one day, but I just want you

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Speaker 1: guys to hear this before we start talking about it.

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Speaker 1: We have to be somewhat brief, so we're not going

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Speaker 1: to get into all of the nooks and crannies of

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Speaker 1: this that we want to, but we just kind of

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Speaker 1: want to bring it to attention. So there's a couple

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Speaker 1: of things, and you kind of gave us these to

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Speaker 1: start with, um, so I want to give you credit

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Speaker 1: for that. But there's a couple of things that we

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Speaker 1: hear over and over and over and over, and as

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Speaker 1: I only have the experience of me, So as a

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Speaker 1: mental health professional, I get these alarm systems in my

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Speaker 1: in my brain going off. I don't know if it

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Speaker 1: feels like that on the outside, and i'd be actually

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Speaker 1: interested in that too. I don't know the Actually I

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Speaker 1: can't say this because I want to say that if

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Speaker 1: I didn't work in mental health, I wouldn't know anything

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Speaker 1: about these things. But who's to say that I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: still be interested in learning about them. So I'd be

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Speaker 1: interested in to hear all of that. To be said,

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Speaker 1: I'd be interested in in knowing if these alarms go off.

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Speaker 1: And people who are not in the mental health world too,

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Speaker 1: So let me know. You can email me and get

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Speaker 1: me your experience. That would be interesting to me. But

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Speaker 1: so there's these terms or these things, and we're going

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Speaker 1: to talk about them. The first one that we have

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Speaker 1: is bipolar. We've all heard somebody say, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: they were so bipolar, or my X was bipolar, or

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Speaker 1: wear acting. Oh the weather is so bipolar. Yes, Okay,

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Speaker 1: what I think people mean by that is one thing

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Speaker 1: that it isn't. So I think when people says like

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Speaker 1: the weather's bipolar. It was really cold and the next

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Speaker 1: day it was hot where it was raining and storming

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Speaker 1: and whatever, and the next day it was beautiful. It's

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Speaker 1: like the erratic, drastic, dramatic changes from black to white, unpredictable, unpredictable.

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Speaker 1: Who would have known? And we do that with people too.

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Speaker 1: We have somebody who doesn't have a lot of emotional regulation,

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Speaker 1: or we don't know what goes on with somebody, and

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Speaker 1: maybe we saw them and they were in a good

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Speaker 1: mood and the next time we saw them that day,

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Speaker 1: they were crying or they were piste off, and so

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Speaker 1: she was being so bipolar today is something that might

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Speaker 1: come out of somebody's mouth. I get why somebody would

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Speaker 1: think that, right, but let's talk about why that doesn't

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Speaker 1: actually fit and why that actually is harmful to use

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Speaker 1: that language. Yeah, gosh, this is a big one for me.

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Speaker 1: You know, I have people who are super close to

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Speaker 1: my life who have bipolar disorder. So this is as

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Speaker 1: a clinical term, which I don't know if the word

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Speaker 1: bipolar exists in its own world. It's not really common

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Speaker 1: American language. So well, it's just not even give I

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Speaker 1: don't want to give anyone permission to use it as

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Speaker 1: a non clinical term, because really the only reference we

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Speaker 1: have for it in the West is a mental health disorder.

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Speaker 1: So someone is not bipolar, just like someone is not

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Speaker 1: depression or someone is not PTSD. They have bipolar disorder,

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Speaker 1: and it is a chemical disorder in the brain. That's

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Speaker 1: what it is. And so because brain chemistry has a

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Speaker 1: lot of imbalances and over and under of lots of

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Speaker 1: specific chemicals that regulate a lot of different things in

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Speaker 1: human behavior are going haywire or abnormal um they're basically

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Speaker 1: over under functioning in the way that a regulated, healthy

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Speaker 1: brain would lots of behaviors then become disregulated also, so

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Speaker 1: that would look like sleep is super disregulated. If you're

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Speaker 1: in a manic side of bipolar disorder, you won't need

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Speaker 1: a lot of sleep. You're gonna have a whole whole,

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Speaker 1: whole lot of energy going on. You might need two

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Speaker 1: hours of sleep at night, and you can do that

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Speaker 1: for long periods of time, which we know that also

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Speaker 1: distorts reality. When we don't sleep, our brains get super unclear, interrational.

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Speaker 1: You are going to feel like great them You're so

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Speaker 1: happy and on top of the world. You've got the

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Speaker 1: best ideas um you think that you can kind of

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Speaker 1: do anything, invincibility, grandiosity, that kind of thing. Your rapid

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Speaker 1: speech going really quick. Everything is sped up and in

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Speaker 1: a pretty you know, a pretty happy way. There's not

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Speaker 1: a whole lot of violent or behavior is not super

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Speaker 1: associated with manic episodes. It's not something that's even a

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Speaker 1: part of the d s M. Actually violent behaviors maybe

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Speaker 1: erratic and so you may accidentally kind of like be aggressive,

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Speaker 1: but you are just being intense and passionate. And then

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Speaker 1: the other side of it is depression. So bipolar, that's

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Speaker 1: the nature is you kind of swing from a really

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Speaker 1: really high, high intense state of mania and then you're

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Speaker 1: going to crash eventually over a period of time. These

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Speaker 1: also last, at least in rapid cycling bipolar disorder. Three

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Speaker 1: days is the shortest amount of time, which are an

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Speaker 1: episode really important for people to hear. Not this morning

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Speaker 1: and tonight. You would not be mannic and depressed in

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Speaker 1: the same day. That's not mania, let alone the same conversation.

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Speaker 1: That's right. So these are states that your brain is

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Speaker 1: stuck in for a prolonged period of time, which is

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Speaker 1: why it becomes so disregulated and dysfunctional to the system

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Speaker 1: um and to our behaviors. And so after usually a week,

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Speaker 1: sometimes even longer, someone will then start to down grade

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Speaker 1: into depression. And this is I think the body's way

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Speaker 1: of actually trying to get a balance, because it knows

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Speaker 1: that it just went way, way high and it's going

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Speaker 1: to take you away way low to try to get

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Speaker 1: homeostasis back in. And then you're going to be in

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Speaker 1: the irrationality of depression, which is hopelessness and maybe suicidality

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Speaker 1: and things that also are not a healthy, irrational way

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Speaker 1: of looking at yourself for the world, um, but you're

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Speaker 1: stuck and so you can't function well on that side

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Speaker 1: of things. And then there's middle grounds. People aren't always

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Speaker 1: shifting like every other week. They usually have periods of

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Speaker 1: kind of like stabling out and then they'll kind of

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Speaker 1: if they're not medicated, then will continue to kind of

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Speaker 1: move through those cycles. That's what it actually is. And

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Speaker 1: I think also, I don't know if you said this,

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Speaker 1: I could have missed it, but there's different kinds of

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Speaker 1: bipolar disorder. So there's also hypomania that isn't to the

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Speaker 1: extreme that you expressed it, which it's pretty tricky sometimes

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Speaker 1: because it doesn't. It's because it's not as extreme, somebody

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Speaker 1: can easily just kind of ignore it or look at

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Speaker 1: it as, oh, I was just like in a good mood,

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Speaker 1: but my behavior wasn't to that, so and we can

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Speaker 1: kind of downplay it. But the point of all that

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Speaker 1: I want you to hear is one, chemical imbalance in

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Speaker 1: the brain is a huge part of it. And it's

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Speaker 1: not like somebody isn't bipolar. They have a disorder like disting,

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Speaker 1: and I think that should be taken really seriously. The

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Speaker 1: other part I want you to hear is that again, yeah,

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Speaker 1: this isn't like I was in a conversation with somebody

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Speaker 1: and they were fine and all of a sudden they snapped,

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Speaker 1: that's not somebody being bipolar. That can be something else.

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Speaker 1: That's right. We can talk about that means something else,

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Speaker 1: but that's not what that is. And I think that

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Speaker 1: one of the reasons that it bothers me is it

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Speaker 1: kind of we can poke fun at the disorder. And again,

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Speaker 1: nobody is making fun of somebody for having cancer. I'll

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Speaker 1: come back to that all the time of it's really

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Speaker 1: upsetting to me to be sitting with somebody who's like,

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Speaker 1: please don't like I don't want to have bipolar disorder, Like,

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Speaker 1: please don't say that that's what you think it is

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Speaker 1: when it's not for the same reason that somebody doesn't

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00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:29,800
Speaker 1: want to be diagnosed with cancer. It's because I don't

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Speaker 1: want to be that. Instead, if I don't want to

431
00:23:32,680 --> 00:23:34,560
Speaker 1: have I don't want people to think that of me.

432
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:37,400
Speaker 1: But nobody thinks that somebody is going well, I can't

433
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:39,600
Speaker 1: say nobody. For the most part, we don't think somebody's

434
00:23:39,640 --> 00:23:43,800
Speaker 1: going to think poorly of our character or who we

435
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:46,159
Speaker 1: are as a person. Or we get to diagnose with

436
00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:51,840
Speaker 1: cancer and that is to me heartbreaking, and it's it

437
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:54,359
Speaker 1: doesn't have to be that way, and part of that

438
00:23:54,600 --> 00:23:58,000
Speaker 1: is understanding what it is. So then we're not like,

439
00:23:58,040 --> 00:24:00,280
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, the weather was so bipolar. Yes, today,

440
00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:02,800
Speaker 1: I'm so annoying. And then like somebody's sitting there and

441
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:06,159
Speaker 1: you don't know, you don't know that they have bipolar disorder,

442
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:09,240
Speaker 1: and what that sounds like because it sounds derogatory, It

443
00:24:09,240 --> 00:24:12,280
Speaker 1: doesn't sound compliment. First of all, we can hear that

444
00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:15,359
Speaker 1: in the town. There's an inference in what you're saying.

445
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 1: There's no empathy. I feel like that's coming to me now,

446
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:21,680
Speaker 1: as I said that, like when you when somebody gets

447
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:24,679
Speaker 1: diagnosed from cancer, very often you'll see them post about it,

448
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:27,920
Speaker 1: and you'll ask for thoughts and prayers, and uh, there's

449
00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:30,680
Speaker 1: a lot of outpoint of empathy of oh my gosh,

450
00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:33,960
Speaker 1: like can I do anything for you? Very rarely I've

451
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:38,320
Speaker 1: never seen somebody post on their Facebook or Instagram recently

452
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:43,080
Speaker 1: got diagnosed with bipolar wan or bipolar too, and um,

453
00:24:43,119 --> 00:24:45,320
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go. I'm going to try out these different

454
00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:47,159
Speaker 1: medications to see if they help. It might take a

455
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:49,840
Speaker 1: lot to find the right combination, but I really appreciate

456
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:52,439
Speaker 1: your thoughts and prayers. Nobody's like, can I start a

457
00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:56,040
Speaker 1: mail train for you? Nobody's doing that, and and I

458
00:24:56,080 --> 00:25:05,120
Speaker 1: think that's pretty upsetting. H Nobody's like, can I start

459
00:25:05,119 --> 00:25:08,679
Speaker 1: a mail train for you? Nobody's doing that, and and

460
00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:12,159
Speaker 1: I think that's pretty upsetting. I've thought about that. I

461
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:15,160
Speaker 1: think I think it it brings me into a similar

462
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:19,320
Speaker 1: um perspective of addiction, you know, where I think if

463
00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:23,880
Speaker 1: we treated these kind of mental illnesses, these diagnoses, these

464
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:29,520
Speaker 1: diseases disorders like medical illnesses, you know, and they're messier.

465
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:31,639
Speaker 1: You know, there's a lot there's a there's a messier

466
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:35,880
Speaker 1: nature to it because people get affected, relationships are hurt

467
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:39,200
Speaker 1: because it's behavioral, and so there's that side of it.

468
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:41,439
Speaker 1: But also, you know, if we saw it as a

469
00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:46,520
Speaker 1: person with an illness that they didn't choose to have

470
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:52,240
Speaker 1: and didn't make their brains develop, you know, nobody wants

471
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:56,280
Speaker 1: to be addicted to heroin. They get addicted to heroin.

472
00:25:57,160 --> 00:26:00,440
Speaker 1: And nobody wants to have bipolar disort in their in

473
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:04,199
Speaker 1: their brain chemistry, and they have it. And so the

474
00:26:04,280 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 1: other side is like one is absolutely empathy and the

475
00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:10,360
Speaker 1: other side is and in those disorders, even though they

476
00:26:10,359 --> 00:26:13,120
Speaker 1: didn't choose to have them and they can't necessarily make

477
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:16,720
Speaker 1: them stop immediately on their own, they are also responsible

478
00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:19,159
Speaker 1: for the way it affects the people around them. And

479
00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:23,080
Speaker 1: so that's part of people's recovery. UM. Once they can

480
00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:25,280
Speaker 1: get into a place of stability, when they have the

481
00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 1: actual treatment that they need to get well to get stabilized,

482
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 1: UM and either of those, then they can address those things.

483
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:37,000
Speaker 1: I mean, can you imagine you know, the mess that

484
00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:40,600
Speaker 1: can you imagine facing the things that you've you've said

485
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:44,320
Speaker 1: or done, you know, blowing your family's money in a

486
00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:48,600
Speaker 1: manic episode and you have children, and you know, like

487
00:26:48,720 --> 00:26:51,400
Speaker 1: you scared them because you're awake for five days and

488
00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:54,480
Speaker 1: you seem like a crazy person to them. That doesn't

489
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:57,040
Speaker 1: go away, and nobody is going to just say, oh, well,

490
00:26:57,119 --> 00:27:01,080
Speaker 1: you have a brain disorder, so all good. I mean,

491
00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:05,399
Speaker 1: that's not humans. And there's an empathy to have on

492
00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:08,320
Speaker 1: what it means to have not been in control of

493
00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:10,960
Speaker 1: your body. Well, and there's such a like a cyclical

494
00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:14,800
Speaker 1: pattern there because as you're speaking, I'm thinking of, okay, well,

495
00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:18,800
Speaker 1: what helps people better able to face those things and

496
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,000
Speaker 1: better able to take that responsibility. Well, a lot of

497
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:26,520
Speaker 1: that that therapy, right, whether that's group there therapy, individual therapy,

498
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:29,760
Speaker 1: going to treatment, and because there's such a stigma and

499
00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:33,000
Speaker 1: a misunderstanding and this can be harder to diagnose. Because

500
00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:35,600
Speaker 1: of those two things, people are less likely to be

501
00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:38,560
Speaker 1: in therapy, so they're less likely to actually go and

502
00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:40,760
Speaker 1: do that, and so the process just continues and there

503
00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:47,359
Speaker 1: then continues to be this like moral failing outlook that

504
00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:48,920
Speaker 1: really has to be because we don't have as many

505
00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:52,440
Speaker 1: people doing the responsibility part. So hearing this kind of

506
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:54,640
Speaker 1: stuff I think is it's not going to fix the problem,

507
00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:57,959
Speaker 1: but it is part of the solution of of really

508
00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:04,120
Speaker 1: taking ownership at somebody who I don't have bipolar disorder. Okay,

509
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:06,760
Speaker 1: so I can actually learn about it too, though, because

510
00:28:06,760 --> 00:28:08,480
Speaker 1: I don't have cancer either, and I know a lot

511
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:10,520
Speaker 1: about I don't know a lot, but like I have

512
00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:14,000
Speaker 1: a general understanding of what can happen when somebody gets that,

513
00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:17,080
Speaker 1: And so I think it would be really cool for

514
00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:21,359
Speaker 1: us to as we're destigmatizing a lot of mental health

515
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:25,840
Speaker 1: things instead of just making the word popular, making the

516
00:28:25,960 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 1: actual understanding of the diagnosis popular. Yeah, And that's why

517
00:28:30,080 --> 00:28:34,280
Speaker 1: this conversation matters, is because if people without being a

518
00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:37,440
Speaker 1: mental health expert, which you're not unless you're a mentalth

519
00:28:39,480 --> 00:28:41,480
Speaker 1: which is very important for you to say right now,

520
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:44,520
Speaker 1: I feel like it shouldn't be, but it is UM

521
00:28:44,560 --> 00:28:48,280
Speaker 1: Without that um, without like being educated around with these

522
00:28:48,280 --> 00:28:51,200
Speaker 1: things look like and how to treat them, especially then

523
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:53,640
Speaker 1: you can know as much as you can so that

524
00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:55,960
Speaker 1: you can get people where they need to get to

525
00:28:55,960 --> 00:28:58,280
Speaker 1: to get the help that they need, you know. I

526
00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:00,640
Speaker 1: some of the people that I've seen and have the

527
00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:04,400
Speaker 1: most success was getting stabilized with bipolar disorder and having

528
00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:08,040
Speaker 1: recovery and like being episode free. It was people who

529
00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:10,720
Speaker 1: were happy to be the closest people to them who

530
00:29:10,760 --> 00:29:14,200
Speaker 1: knew what it was. They just knew this is a

531
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:19,880
Speaker 1: mental health, brain disorder, so that guided their steps. I've

532
00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:22,160
Speaker 1: got to get them to the hospital, to a psychiatrist.

533
00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:23,520
Speaker 1: I've got to get them to it there because I've

534
00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:25,480
Speaker 1: got to get them to the to the psychiatric hospital.

535
00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:27,720
Speaker 1: That's what I have to do. I know that because

536
00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:31,040
Speaker 1: I know what this is, and that gives people, you know,

537
00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:33,400
Speaker 1: more of a chance. You can't obviously if they're grown up,

538
00:29:33,440 --> 00:29:35,560
Speaker 1: you have don't have a lot of leverage, but you'll

539
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:38,960
Speaker 1: at least really know the right direction to push a

540
00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:41,560
Speaker 1: person into if you have a clue of what's going on.

541
00:29:41,640 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 1: But if we throw around the word bipolar, like people

542
00:29:43,640 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 1: who are mad one second and upset them the next

543
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:50,680
Speaker 1: or find them the next second, then someone who's sitting

544
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 1: in front of you, who's like been up for three

545
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:56,000
Speaker 1: days and has like you know, created a masterpiece painting

546
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:59,120
Speaker 1: on their wall and it feels like they're doing great,

547
00:29:59,240 --> 00:30:02,000
Speaker 1: you know, like they're not taking themselves to the hospital.

548
00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:04,840
Speaker 1: I think that's really important though, to say that somebody

549
00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:07,520
Speaker 1: who is in a manic state, you have to remember

550
00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:10,640
Speaker 1: they're not They're not a clearheaded person in a manic state.

551
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:14,200
Speaker 1: I don't have access. Yeah, so I think that people like,

552
00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:17,000
Speaker 1: wouldn't somebody know, like if you were doing that, isn't

553
00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:19,160
Speaker 1: that like red flag behavior? And it's like, no, you

554
00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:20,840
Speaker 1: have to catch the red flags way before the red

555
00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 1: flags show up, right, And and that's something that somebody

556
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:25,880
Speaker 1: wants to diagnosed, can like look at the history of

557
00:30:25,920 --> 00:30:29,560
Speaker 1: their behavior and do But yeah, it's not I've got

558
00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:32,560
Speaker 1: a little small window really with bipolar disorder that you

559
00:30:32,560 --> 00:30:36,400
Speaker 1: can try to catch someone on the copdown is because

560
00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:38,920
Speaker 1: they're feeling that's a good moment come in similar with

561
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:42,720
Speaker 1: addiction when they hit a wall and they're like, oh,

562
00:30:42,760 --> 00:30:45,239
Speaker 1: I don't feel good, what just happened? They're kind of

563
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:49,320
Speaker 1: looking at the chaos. That's say, hey, I think can

564
00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:50,959
Speaker 1: we take a look at what's been going on? Can

565
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 1: you can you maybe go get help for this and

566
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:56,200
Speaker 1: really getting you know, a healthy medication regiment is the

567
00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,200
Speaker 1: best is the best option for that person, which is

568
00:30:58,200 --> 00:31:00,440
Speaker 1: a whole has whole a lot of barriers and itself.

569
00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 1: But to have a clue what's going on so that

570
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:05,720
Speaker 1: you can at least frame that to this person. But yeah,

571
00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:08,120
Speaker 1: if we think it's you know up one second, down

572
00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:10,120
Speaker 1: the next. Then I'm going to be sitting in front

573
00:31:10,160 --> 00:31:14,080
Speaker 1: of someone with a serious mental health disorder, which is bipolar,

574
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:17,360
Speaker 1: and I'm not going to really understand it as that,

575
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:19,800
Speaker 1: and I'm not gonna I'm not gonna feel like I

576
00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:22,760
Speaker 1: need to, you know, if we throw around bipolar disorder,

577
00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:24,240
Speaker 1: I'm not going to feel like they need mental health

578
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:30,480
Speaker 1: treatment like a significant life change or a recovery process.

579
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 1: The other caution I would just want to say quickly

580
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:36,640
Speaker 1: about bipolar disorder using the word is if Also what

581
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:40,120
Speaker 1: I've seen happen is someone stable, people have only known

582
00:31:40,120 --> 00:31:43,040
Speaker 1: a person who's stable, who has not had episodes. They

583
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:46,320
Speaker 1: might disclose that they have bipolar disorder, and people will say, no,

584
00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 1: you don't not you you're so yeah, what do you mean,

585
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:53,120
Speaker 1: Like you're so calm, you're so grounded, like you're healthy,

586
00:31:53,160 --> 00:31:58,560
Speaker 1: you're fine. Just as damaging, that's well, it's invalidating at

587
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 1: the invalidating. So don't do that. Don't tell them that

588
00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:09,240
Speaker 1: they don't have a diagnosis when they just got vulnerable

589
00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:12,680
Speaker 1: and told you something really probably intimate about themselves, just

590
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:15,200
Speaker 1: because and again it goes back to the misperception of

591
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:18,160
Speaker 1: what is it it is something that can be treated

592
00:32:18,280 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 1: and regulated. It is. And so you know, it's like

593
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:24,040
Speaker 1: if someone said that they were recovering addict, you would

594
00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:26,000
Speaker 1: be like, I mean sometimes they say that too, No

595
00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:29,440
Speaker 1: you're not, you look so healthy whatever, and it's like,

596
00:32:29,560 --> 00:32:34,240
Speaker 1: you're so nice whatever. I'm well, like, I'm I'm stable. Now,

597
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:37,200
Speaker 1: this is me, just myself. I have a disorder that,

598
00:32:37,280 --> 00:32:42,120
Speaker 1: if not treated, looks like a lot of instability. The

599
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 1: reason I'm not in those episodes because I'm treating it

600
00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:48,240
Speaker 1: right now, you know. So that's another thing that that

601
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:51,960
Speaker 1: we can say someone can doesn't have a mental illness

602
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:54,680
Speaker 1: because it doesn't look the way we think it's supposed

603
00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:57,880
Speaker 1: to look, or we don't understand what the phases of

604
00:32:57,920 --> 00:33:00,440
Speaker 1: that are well. And I think in the same breath

605
00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:04,720
Speaker 1: of that is why it's so important to not make

606
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:08,640
Speaker 1: fun of the word or just use it and just

607
00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:12,520
Speaker 1: like a flippant way. Is because there are people all

608
00:33:12,560 --> 00:33:16,719
Speaker 1: around you who have bipolar disorder who are are regulated.

609
00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:21,080
Speaker 1: And when you hear somebody make fun of somebody or

610
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:25,040
Speaker 1: call somebody who might just have a mood swing or

611
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:28,400
Speaker 1: I have had a bad day, I don't know when

612
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:31,560
Speaker 1: you use that language in front of them again, it's

613
00:33:31,600 --> 00:33:34,040
Speaker 1: the cyclical nature of which I do not blame them.

614
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:40,040
Speaker 1: They are much less likely to hold their diagnosis to themselves,

615
00:33:40,160 --> 00:33:42,719
Speaker 1: and so you're not going to get that picture of

616
00:33:42,800 --> 00:33:46,120
Speaker 1: like wait, like I'm a stable, I'm functioning in society,

617
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:48,880
Speaker 1: your friends with me, Like, you're not going to get that,

618
00:33:48,920 --> 00:33:50,440
Speaker 1: and you're not going to have a clear picture. So

619
00:33:50,800 --> 00:33:53,680
Speaker 1: when you use those words, there are people all around

620
00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:57,360
Speaker 1: you listening that are that. I feel shame, Like that's

621
00:33:57,480 --> 00:34:00,680
Speaker 1: really like, I'm just thinking of myself for I don't

622
00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:04,520
Speaker 1: have that diagnosis. But I have been in spaces where

623
00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:08,720
Speaker 1: people would say things about body image or eating disorders

624
00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:13,799
Speaker 1: or even just anxiety, and like they say that kind

625
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:18,919
Speaker 1: of stuff, yeah, or like there's plenty of because it's

626
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:22,120
Speaker 1: also something that's so nuanced, of people saying things like

627
00:34:22,840 --> 00:34:26,520
Speaker 1: god like negative body comments and like I'm less likely

628
00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:28,879
Speaker 1: to share any of my story with those people because

629
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:31,080
Speaker 1: they don't feel safe. And then those people don't get

630
00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:35,520
Speaker 1: a better understanding of what eating disorders and just like

631
00:34:35,560 --> 00:34:37,480
Speaker 1: any of those kind of internal struggles look like. And

632
00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:41,120
Speaker 1: so you're not gonna be perfect. None of these conversations

633
00:34:41,120 --> 00:34:43,719
Speaker 1: are about getting the world into a place where we

634
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:46,719
Speaker 1: use every word perfectly, we don't mess up. It's all

635
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:50,719
Speaker 1: about again empowering us to actually use the language that

636
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:54,000
Speaker 1: makes sense to describe the things that we're seeing and experiencing.

637
00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 1: And if someone else has it, they're an expert on it,

638
00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:59,840
Speaker 1: so ask them about like what what? Tell me? What?

639
00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:03,319
Speaker 1: What a great response when somebody's like I actually have

640
00:35:03,360 --> 00:35:05,640
Speaker 1: bipolar disorder instead of saying no, you don't, what a

641
00:35:05,719 --> 00:35:08,400
Speaker 1: cool way to say, like, oh my gosh, I personally

642
00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:12,440
Speaker 1: never would have a guess that. Can you actually tell

643
00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:14,080
Speaker 1: me about what that means? Because I must have the

644
00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:18,000
Speaker 1: wrong idea. Yes, educate me, I would be like sit down.

645
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:21,120
Speaker 1: I wouldn't because I don't want to. But yeah, when

646
00:35:21,160 --> 00:35:22,799
Speaker 1: it comes to the stuff that I struggle with. So,

647
00:35:23,480 --> 00:35:25,279
Speaker 1: what I think we're gonna do, I'm gonna I think

648
00:35:25,320 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 1: I'm gonna use this term correctly. I'm gonna call an

649
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:31,160
Speaker 1: audible make a game time decision. I'm in the midst

650
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:34,120
Speaker 1: of learning about how like football works have never cared

651
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:36,800
Speaker 1: and now I'm I still don't really care, but I'm

652
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:39,040
Speaker 1: trying to learn anyway. So I think what we're gonna

653
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,640
Speaker 1: do because we don't have time to get into anything

654
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:43,880
Speaker 1: else and I don't want to rush through something that

655
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:46,880
Speaker 1: I find important. You want to make this like a series.

656
00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:49,360
Speaker 1: Sounds like a really cool series. Okay, so this is

657
00:35:49,360 --> 00:35:52,760
Speaker 1: gonna be serious, and you guys are hearing us create

658
00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:55,160
Speaker 1: the series because there's always gonna be new things that

659
00:35:55,200 --> 00:35:58,759
Speaker 1: come up, and because information is coming out more and

660
00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:00,600
Speaker 1: work and we have more access. Like I talked about

661
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:02,560
Speaker 1: in the beginning of all this, there's always going to

662
00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:06,759
Speaker 1: be another term or another thing or another what have

663
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 1: you that is becoming more popular in our language that

664
00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:14,600
Speaker 1: needs to kind of be teased out. So we're going

665
00:36:14,640 --> 00:36:17,359
Speaker 1: to keep doing this. And I know on the last

666
00:36:17,360 --> 00:36:19,759
Speaker 1: episode that we did, I said, like, send me in

667
00:36:19,880 --> 00:36:22,520
Speaker 1: your guesses on what the next couple of things we're

668
00:36:22,520 --> 00:36:25,200
Speaker 1: going to talk about are. But in lieu of that,

669
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:28,160
Speaker 1: I want you guys to actually send in what are

670
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:30,600
Speaker 1: the things that you feel like or the words of

671
00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:33,000
Speaker 1: the terms that you feel like you might say or

672
00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:35,640
Speaker 1: that you hear all the time that you don't understand

673
00:36:35,719 --> 00:36:39,480
Speaker 1: or you think are being misused. Because we can talk

674
00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:44,879
Speaker 1: about those things so far, it's done. Abuse, abandonment, bipolar

675
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:48,160
Speaker 1: and self care and self care. Those are big ones,

676
00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:51,759
Speaker 1: and there's any more way to talk about these things.

677
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:55,680
Speaker 1: It really is because I think that, like something that

678
00:36:56,080 --> 00:36:59,360
Speaker 1: you said in the first episode was like, you have

679
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:01,960
Speaker 1: permission to use the language that that you want to use,

680
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:06,759
Speaker 1: and that fits with some things, right, That bits with

681
00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:09,200
Speaker 1: some things. But when it comes to I think we're

682
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:14,520
Speaker 1: also getting into this more clinical space where like I

683
00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:20,839
Speaker 1: don't get to actually call myself bipolar when I had

684
00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:23,200
Speaker 1: a hard day at work and I maybe cried. I

685
00:37:23,239 --> 00:37:26,839
Speaker 1: don't get to do that. And so there's again we're

686
00:37:26,840 --> 00:37:28,719
Speaker 1: going to use this word over and over again. There's

687
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:32,759
Speaker 1: nuance even in that permission to call things what fills right,

688
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:39,080
Speaker 1: because sometimes you're transperl Yeah, and some things are clearly defined. Yeah,

689
00:37:39,719 --> 00:37:44,080
Speaker 1: I means like bipolar disorder is a specific thing. And

690
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:46,560
Speaker 1: if you want to think you're you want to look

691
00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:48,600
Speaker 1: up the d s M five every time you want

692
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:50,680
Speaker 1: to maybe use it in reference to your life. You

693
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:55,160
Speaker 1: can see if it fits and you won't. So you know,

694
00:37:55,360 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 1: there are things that like it's I think with abandonment,

695
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:01,760
Speaker 1: like we gave a definition of what that it means

696
00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:05,680
Speaker 1: a specific thing. So there are words that are a

697
00:38:05,680 --> 00:38:09,280
Speaker 1: bit a bit more nuanced and can have a spectrum

698
00:38:09,320 --> 00:38:12,319
Speaker 1: of and and you can have permission to use, but

699
00:38:12,680 --> 00:38:15,840
Speaker 1: there are also things that mean something and if that

700
00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:18,640
Speaker 1: doesn't apply, then we might need to find a search

701
00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:23,279
Speaker 1: for another word. So yeah, which again I'm gonna stop

702
00:38:23,320 --> 00:38:25,239
Speaker 1: because we're gonna keep going and say I'm going to

703
00:38:25,280 --> 00:38:27,319
Speaker 1: have a thought for everything. But yeah, that's what we're

704
00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:29,560
Speaker 1: gonna do. So send them in. You can send them

705
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,480
Speaker 1: to If you really want me to see what you

706
00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:34,960
Speaker 1: are sending me, send it to Catherine at you Need

707
00:38:35,040 --> 00:38:39,279
Speaker 1: Therapy Podcast dot com. You can send it on Instagram,

708
00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:41,960
Speaker 1: but I'm less likely to see it, so please don't.

709
00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:45,359
Speaker 1: Sometimes I get emails from you guys that say like

710
00:38:45,680 --> 00:38:47,799
Speaker 1: I damned you and I never heard back, and that's

711
00:38:47,800 --> 00:38:50,799
Speaker 1: because I don't really spend a ton of time on

712
00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:53,879
Speaker 1: that Instagram and I don't go through a lot of

713
00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:56,200
Speaker 1: They get sent a different folder and so I just

714
00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:58,640
Speaker 1: missed them. But if you send them to my email,

715
00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:02,400
Speaker 1: I will not miss it. So again, Catherine at you

716
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:05,359
Speaker 1: Need Therapy Podcast dot com. You can follow me if

717
00:39:05,360 --> 00:39:07,640
Speaker 1: you want to just like see stuff about the podcast

718
00:39:07,680 --> 00:39:12,000
Speaker 1: on Instagram you need Therapy Podcast and my personal account

719
00:39:12,120 --> 00:39:14,239
Speaker 1: is at cat dot to fata Do you want people

720
00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:20,160
Speaker 1: to follow you? Okay? Kind of feeling um that you'd

721
00:39:20,360 --> 00:39:23,160
Speaker 1: just like to hang out by yourself over there. Um.

722
00:39:23,200 --> 00:39:25,319
Speaker 1: But yeah, so be expecting more of these. I don't

723
00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:27,399
Speaker 1: know when they'll happen, but they will happen because I

724
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:29,200
Speaker 1: am actually getting a lot out of this, and I

725
00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:32,200
Speaker 1: hope you guys are too. Thank you, Tara, thanks for

726
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:37,080
Speaker 1: and I and we will talk to you lather. Bye

727
00:39:37,239 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 1: bye