1 00:00:01,400 --> 00:00:04,000 Speaker 1: Time for today's Strawberry Letter, and if you need advice 2 00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:07,240 Speaker 1: on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more, we do want 3 00:00:07,240 --> 00:00:10,319 Speaker 1: to hear from you, So please submit your Strawberry Letter 4 00:00:10,360 --> 00:00:14,120 Speaker 1: to Steve HARVEYFM dot com. Click on submit Strawberry Letter 5 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:18,000 Speaker 1: and we could be reading your letter live on the air, 6 00:00:18,079 --> 00:00:19,800 Speaker 1: just like we're going to read this one right here, 7 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:23,759 Speaker 1: right now. You never know it could be yours. Yeah, 8 00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:26,040 Speaker 1: ladies and gentlemen, it is time for the Strawberry Letter 9 00:00:26,079 --> 00:00:29,960 Speaker 1: with my good friend Shirley Strawberry. Thank you, junior. Subject 10 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:34,080 Speaker 1: to keeping a secret always backfires. Dear Stephen, Shirley, I'm 11 00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:36,760 Speaker 1: in my late twenties and I got married two years ago. 12 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:39,839 Speaker 1: My husband is eleven years older than I am, and 13 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 1: he's a great man, but he went through a brief 14 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:46,280 Speaker 1: period of ed before we got married. I was young 15 00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:49,839 Speaker 1: and carefree at the time, so I did something very stupid. 16 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:53,200 Speaker 1: I had gone for close to three months without sex 17 00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:55,920 Speaker 1: with my man, and I went to a wedding back 18 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:59,040 Speaker 1: in my hometown and had sex with my ex boyfriend 19 00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:02,120 Speaker 1: from high school. All of the feelings I had for 20 00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:04,920 Speaker 1: him came flooding back, and I had an affair with 21 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:07,640 Speaker 1: him for two months. He flew in to see me 22 00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:09,839 Speaker 1: during the week and I would leave work and spend 23 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:14,040 Speaker 1: the afternoon with him at different hotels. Then he ghosted 24 00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:17,840 Speaker 1: me without any explanation, and I was deeply hurt. I 25 00:01:17,959 --> 00:01:21,119 Speaker 1: confided in one of my closest friends, and she kept 26 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:24,000 Speaker 1: it real with me and said I needed to get 27 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:26,680 Speaker 1: over it and marry the man that's in love with me. 28 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:30,720 Speaker 1: I got engaged and this close friend wanted to be 29 00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:34,720 Speaker 1: a bridesmaid, but I had to choose my fiance sister 30 00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:38,160 Speaker 1: instead of her. She told me that she understood, and 31 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,800 Speaker 1: I was relieved until one of our other friends told 32 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 1: me that the girl was calling me a lucky b 33 00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:47,440 Speaker 1: behind my back. I thought she was jealous because she 34 00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:50,800 Speaker 1: was single, so I let it slide. I got pregnant 35 00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:53,040 Speaker 1: on my wedding night, and my life has been non 36 00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:56,440 Speaker 1: stop since then. I ran into my old friend and 37 00:01:56,560 --> 00:02:00,160 Speaker 1: she was very bitter. I want to hug her, she 38 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:03,640 Speaker 1: pulled back. She said I ghosted her after I got 39 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:06,560 Speaker 1: everything I wanted, and my husband should know who I 40 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:10,240 Speaker 1: really am in love with. I insisted that I do 41 00:02:10,320 --> 00:02:13,359 Speaker 1: love my husband and that affair I had was a mistake. 42 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:17,840 Speaker 1: She walked away, smirking. And said, have a nice life. 43 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:20,480 Speaker 1: Do I try to fix our friendship so she won't 44 00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:24,400 Speaker 1: tell my secret? Well, I say no, because she's not 45 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:27,680 Speaker 1: your friend, and she's not anyone that you need in 46 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:30,360 Speaker 1: your life right now. I mean, you know, not with 47 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,400 Speaker 1: all the negative energy she's got around her. I would 48 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:36,520 Speaker 1: stay as far away from her as possible. I mean, 49 00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:38,920 Speaker 1: you said, it's been two years since you got married, 50 00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:41,600 Speaker 1: got pregnant, and more than two years since the affair. 51 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:47,080 Speaker 1: I say, you're a major mom with serious responsibilities now, 52 00:02:47,160 --> 00:02:50,160 Speaker 1: and what she's talking about is petty and more than that, 53 00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:53,600 Speaker 1: it's over. It's done with, so continue to live your 54 00:02:53,639 --> 00:02:56,799 Speaker 1: NonStop life like you've been doing. This girl is bitter 55 00:02:57,120 --> 00:02:59,160 Speaker 1: because you didn't put her in your wedding, even though 56 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:02,120 Speaker 1: she said at the time it was cool. You didn't 57 00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:05,280 Speaker 1: ghost her. It's just that your life changed so drastically 58 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:08,440 Speaker 1: after marriage. You had a husband and a baby and 59 00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:11,359 Speaker 1: very little time for anything else. I think a real 60 00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:14,960 Speaker 1: friend would have understood that. But now she's threatening to 61 00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:18,920 Speaker 1: you some two year old before you were married affair 62 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:22,359 Speaker 1: against you, which means she hasn't moved on and you had. 63 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:25,480 Speaker 1: She's still upset and she hasn't forgiven you. I think 64 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:28,000 Speaker 1: she was gonna If she was gonna use this in folks, 65 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:30,840 Speaker 1: she would have done it before now. And I just 66 00:03:30,919 --> 00:03:33,320 Speaker 1: think you need to, you know, keep it pushing, keep 67 00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:36,960 Speaker 1: moving forward, and let her stay behind where she needs 68 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:42,920 Speaker 1: to be and out of your life. Steve Well, Shirley's correct. Mary. Yeah, 69 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:45,720 Speaker 1: but let me say this to you. Let's just start 70 00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:52,960 Speaker 1: with the subject keeping a secret always backfire. One of 71 00:03:53,000 --> 00:04:00,000 Speaker 1: my favorite lines. Shut shit, damn MoU that's right, all secret. 72 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:02,200 Speaker 1: That's why they call him to see because a lot 73 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:05,920 Speaker 1: of people do keep secrets. There are a lot of secrets. 74 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:09,440 Speaker 1: There's secrets in the ocean. You can dive down here. 75 00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:11,120 Speaker 1: If you won't, you try to discover them, but your 76 00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:18,400 Speaker 1: a's gonna die because that are secrets that you have 77 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:22,880 Speaker 1: to carry to your grave. I have them, they're going 78 00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:27,080 Speaker 1: with me. I don't even have the urge to tell them. 79 00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:29,039 Speaker 1: I don't have a lot of moments when my guilty 80 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:31,680 Speaker 1: bothering me and stuff washed over me. I don't even 81 00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:37,320 Speaker 1: have that. But that's my secret that you in your 82 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,640 Speaker 1: late twenties, you got married two years ago, your husband 83 00:04:39,720 --> 00:04:43,159 Speaker 1: eleven years old, and he has some erectile dysfunction. Before 84 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:46,080 Speaker 1: you got married, so you was carefree. Y'all didn't have 85 00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:48,960 Speaker 1: sexual three months and you just got horning. You went 86 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:52,800 Speaker 1: to your all ex hometown and rather being your ex 87 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:55,120 Speaker 1: boyfriend out of wed and all the feelings you had 88 00:04:55,160 --> 00:04:58,480 Speaker 1: for him came back, and then you hadn't a fair 89 00:04:58,560 --> 00:05:03,800 Speaker 1: with him at to wed before you was married. That's 90 00:05:03,839 --> 00:05:06,720 Speaker 1: your secret. The problem is you ain't keep it. The 91 00:05:06,760 --> 00:05:08,560 Speaker 1: secret you told somebody. Don't know what the hell you 92 00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:12,040 Speaker 1: told somebody, folk, but you did so you having the 93 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:14,160 Speaker 1: fail for two months, he flew into see me during 94 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:16,520 Speaker 1: the week. I would leave work and spend the afternoon 95 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:20,039 Speaker 1: with him at different hotels. That boy was flying in 96 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:27,159 Speaker 1: bringing it it was convenient. Then he ghosted me without 97 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:32,440 Speaker 1: any explanation, and I was deeply hurt. Well, you showed 98 00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:36,680 Speaker 1: up at the wind with no explanation. You had fiance. 99 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:41,800 Speaker 1: You did something without explaining to him, so he ghosted you. 100 00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:46,160 Speaker 1: Ain't no big deal. You were hurt. Here's the mistake 101 00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:50,480 Speaker 1: you made. You confided in one of your closest friends, 102 00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:54,320 Speaker 1: who we were refer through to throughout the rest of 103 00:05:54,320 --> 00:06:04,240 Speaker 1: this letter as the skank. You you confide in your skank, 104 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:09,120 Speaker 1: he says, your closest friend. But we will refer to 105 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:12,479 Speaker 1: her from the rest of this morning show as that 106 00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:21,000 Speaker 1: that damn skank. Thus skank ah skankads. Oh wow, I 107 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:24,400 Speaker 1: like the number three. Yeah. She kept it real with 108 00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:26,040 Speaker 1: me and said I needed to get over it and 109 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:28,520 Speaker 1: marry the manners in love with me. I got engaged 110 00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:31,240 Speaker 1: in His close friend wanted to be a bridesmaid, but 111 00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:34,240 Speaker 1: I had to choose my fiance sister instead of her. 112 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:38,080 Speaker 1: That's why you made a mistaken When we come back, 113 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:40,880 Speaker 1: I'll tell you what you should have told your damn fiance. 114 00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:43,880 Speaker 1: All right, here we go. We'll have part two of 115 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,680 Speaker 1: Steve's response coming up at twenty three minutes after the 116 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:49,560 Speaker 1: hour of the subject of today's Strawberry letter. Hitting a 117 00:06:49,640 --> 00:06:52,840 Speaker 1: secret always backfires. We'll get back into it right after 118 00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:58,480 Speaker 1: this you're listening show, All right, come on, Steve, let's 119 00:06:58,480 --> 00:07:02,320 Speaker 1: recap today's strawberry letter and finish up with your response. 120 00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:05,400 Speaker 1: Let's go. This young woman in her twenties had a 121 00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:07,919 Speaker 1: man eleven years old. They were gonna get married, and 122 00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:13,080 Speaker 1: he experienced some ed and erectile dysfunction and she needed 123 00:07:13,120 --> 00:07:15,760 Speaker 1: to get herself fixed, so she went to her ex 124 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:19,000 Speaker 1: boyfriend who lived in another town. She was at a 125 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:21,920 Speaker 1: wed ran up in to him. They had feelings and 126 00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:24,240 Speaker 1: they had sex, and then she ended up having a 127 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,000 Speaker 1: a fan for two months. He used to fly in 128 00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 1: town and she leave work early, go down to the 129 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:33,120 Speaker 1: hotel and get ranched, you know, and just things for 130 00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:36,720 Speaker 1: just happening down there. If the word is ranched, yeah, 131 00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:40,200 Speaker 1: you ain't never been ranched before. I recommend it happened 132 00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:44,920 Speaker 1: for you die. It's very cleansing. So she went on there, 133 00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:49,040 Speaker 1: she got ranched and just old and old, old your ranching, 134 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:52,960 Speaker 1: just ranching off. And you know, it's it's a it's 135 00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:57,200 Speaker 1: a it's a derivative of rents. It's a country way 136 00:07:57,200 --> 00:08:00,360 Speaker 1: of saying rints. Like you know, rent that out, ain't 137 00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 1: that out? Ranch? That means harder when you ranch it. 138 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:09,360 Speaker 1: It's harder. If you get a wrench, that's one thing, 139 00:08:09,400 --> 00:08:11,880 Speaker 1: but if you get that damn range, that's a whole 140 00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:14,240 Speaker 1: nother thing. You know what I'm saying, southing So yeah, 141 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:18,480 Speaker 1: to do like that. So now, yeah, just what we 142 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:27,640 Speaker 1: do here we educate and so now so now you 143 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:30,520 Speaker 1: come back and he's been at that hotel, team kill 144 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:33,679 Speaker 1: business and then out of nowhere he ghosted you. Why 145 00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:36,840 Speaker 1: you were surprised about that. I don't know you would 146 00:08:36,840 --> 00:08:41,400 Speaker 1: deeply hurt, so you couldn fide it in the skank. 147 00:08:43,920 --> 00:08:48,360 Speaker 1: You told skanky, and skank kept it real with you 148 00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:51,840 Speaker 1: and said I needed to get over it and married 149 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:54,800 Speaker 1: a man that's in love with me. Now, skank was 150 00:08:54,920 --> 00:08:58,000 Speaker 1: right about that. Now, so you did what skank said. 151 00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:03,400 Speaker 1: I got engaged and this skank wanted to be a 152 00:09:03,480 --> 00:09:08,320 Speaker 1: brides maid, but I had to choose my fiance's sister 153 00:09:08,760 --> 00:09:14,439 Speaker 1: instead of huck. No, you did it. It is your wedding. 154 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:17,480 Speaker 1: You left the fact that he was eleven years older 155 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:20,000 Speaker 1: than you and his sister want to be in a 156 00:09:20,040 --> 00:09:22,199 Speaker 1: win because she's sang. Ain't never been in a win, 157 00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 1: you know, Nobody never asked her to be in a win. 158 00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:26,400 Speaker 1: She want to be in a win so she can 159 00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: get in the line, catch the bouquete because ain't nobody 160 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:32,160 Speaker 1: fitting to ask her uglass to marry her at all. 161 00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:35,640 Speaker 1: So she figured I know she ever because she forced 162 00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:39,439 Speaker 1: herself in the winding. Ugly ass people always pushing themself 163 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:42,200 Speaker 1: in winds and stuff. Ugly people know how to barge 164 00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:45,040 Speaker 1: you and you know, qute people go oh, I'm not selected, Okay, Well, 165 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,839 Speaker 1: good luck, you know, but ugly ass people on you 166 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:50,360 Speaker 1: gonna want me. I'm gonna tell my brother put me 167 00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:52,640 Speaker 1: and you win. Now, we hadn't get all this extra 168 00:09:52,679 --> 00:09:55,679 Speaker 1: fabric to make her dress. Now she down there with me, 169 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:57,840 Speaker 1: and she'd had a special cutch put in the dress 170 00:09:57,880 --> 00:10:00,160 Speaker 1: because she big. Now she got the stomach out and 171 00:10:00,280 --> 00:10:02,560 Speaker 1: both side panels out. She didn't even look like Winnsta 172 00:10:02,640 --> 00:10:05,800 Speaker 1: brised me. But anyway, she got in the wed. Now, 173 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:10,400 Speaker 1: the problem you had was your skank thought that she 174 00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:13,720 Speaker 1: should be in the wed because y'all was cool. This 175 00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 1: is what happens when you cool with the skank. So 176 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:21,839 Speaker 1: skank told you she understood. I was relieved, and to 177 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:24,880 Speaker 1: one of your other friends told you that the skank 178 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:29,080 Speaker 1: was calling you a lucky bee behind your back. I 179 00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:32,400 Speaker 1: thought she was jealous because she was single, so I 180 00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:35,800 Speaker 1: let it slide. Then you got pregnant on your wed night. 181 00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:37,719 Speaker 1: In your life, in non stop every since you ran 182 00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:42,360 Speaker 1: into your skank, you ran into skank cat, let's give 183 00:10:42,360 --> 00:10:45,280 Speaker 1: her name. You ran up in the skank cat, skank cuttter. 184 00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:50,840 Speaker 1: You ran up in the skank cuttter, and she was 185 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:54,559 Speaker 1: very bitter. I went to hug and she pulled back. 186 00:10:55,640 --> 00:11:00,000 Speaker 1: That's cause she skank. She said, I ghosted her after 187 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:02,560 Speaker 1: I got everything I wanted, and my husband should know 188 00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:06,640 Speaker 1: who I'm really in love with. I insisted that I 189 00:11:06,679 --> 00:11:09,120 Speaker 1: do love my husband. The dad a fair was a mistake. 190 00:11:09,559 --> 00:11:12,640 Speaker 1: She walked away smirking and said, have a nice life. 191 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:15,839 Speaker 1: Do I try to fix our friendship so she won't 192 00:11:15,880 --> 00:11:20,200 Speaker 1: tell my secret? Shirley's absolutely correct, Absolutely not. You don't 193 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:23,640 Speaker 1: try to fix this relationship with escape. This ain't your friend, 194 00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:27,120 Speaker 1: she's Escape. Why would you want to fix it with escape? 195 00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:30,280 Speaker 1: What you got to do is fix her. See stopped 196 00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:34,079 Speaker 1: being the victim all the time. Now she's gonna threaten 197 00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:36,680 Speaker 1: to go to your husband with this news. A couple 198 00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:39,120 Speaker 1: of things you need to do. First of all, do 199 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:44,080 Speaker 1: what men done. I mean, look, jess as surprised. Shirley, 200 00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:46,000 Speaker 1: I want you to be the girl coming to tell 201 00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:50,040 Speaker 1: my husband what you know. Start and I'm gonna show 202 00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:53,400 Speaker 1: her how she needed to be. Okay, Clarence, U, Hi, 203 00:11:53,600 --> 00:12:01,240 Speaker 1: you remember me. I'm Betty your wife's friend. You well 204 00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:08,160 Speaker 1: come over because you know there's some things about Betty 205 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:11,559 Speaker 1: that you don't know. And um, I wanted to let 206 00:12:11,559 --> 00:12:17,880 Speaker 1: you know that I know something about her that I think, Yeah, 207 00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:20,640 Speaker 1: I think you should know this about Kurt. Okay, No, 208 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:24,200 Speaker 1: we all often to tell something. Go ahead, Well I don't. 209 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:26,200 Speaker 1: I don't know anything about that. I just know what 210 00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:30,480 Speaker 1: I know. What is that? Well, Um, you remember um 211 00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:33,080 Speaker 1: like there was a period of time like three months 212 00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:36,400 Speaker 1: before you guys got married, um, where you guys didn't 213 00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:41,840 Speaker 1: have sex. You remember that? You don't remember that. You're 214 00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:45,400 Speaker 1: trying to say Clarence had ed. Yeah, I'm trying to 215 00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:48,480 Speaker 1: say Clarence had ed. Clarence, how does he how does 216 00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:55,040 Speaker 1: he for know? You had I E ed? This is fault. No, 217 00:12:55,400 --> 00:13:01,679 Speaker 1: you had e D Clarence. All right, see you can 218 00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:03,800 Speaker 1: it can go something like that. Hit us up on 219 00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:07,880 Speaker 1: Instagram and Steve Harvey FM to comment on today's Strawberry Letter. 220 00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:10,679 Speaker 1: You can also check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand, 221 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:14,079 Speaker 1: coming up next to Sports Talk with Junior. Right after this, 222 00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 1: you're listening to the Name Harvey Morning Show.