Speaker 1: If God watches over all of his children, then why
Speaker 1: wasn't I watched over? I was subject to all forms
Speaker 1: of abuse via my foster family for the last seventeen years. Still,
Speaker 1: to this day, this question has never been answered. Chad Warren, father, husband, pastor, friend,
Speaker 1: frequent guest on the podcast Welcome Back, Sir, it is
Speaker 1: great to be here, man. I love it. I love
Speaker 1: it when you're here. We have questions, and you are
Speaker 1: the man with the answers. I have some answers and
Speaker 1: I'm amen. So we've built this podcast. If you're new,
Speaker 1: we make it as if we're all sitting around a
Speaker 1: campfire or sitting in the truck and there's three of us,
Speaker 1: me and Chad, and you're asking the questions, and we
Speaker 1: could walk through some of these questions as if we've
Speaker 1: known each other forever, then as if we're just giving
Speaker 1: friend advice to each other. If you want to send
Speaker 1: an email, shoot it over to Grangersmith podcast at gmail
Speaker 1: dot com. Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Could be
Speaker 1: any subject. As long as I've done this, now, I
Speaker 1: see the subject matters get wider and wider, and we
Speaker 1: welcome that. So we're going to dig in Chad and
Speaker 1: are going to dig in. I love it when Chad's here.
Speaker 1: You're a Montana boy, Texas replanted, right. And is there
Speaker 1: a state in between Montana and Texas that you lived Colora, Colorado, Colorado? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: so you're cover. Some consider North Texas so not Colorado.
Speaker 1: People they hate that. No, they don't get the Texas
Speaker 1: out of here. Yeah. And when we live there, my
Speaker 1: wife being from Texas and that's where we met. I
Speaker 1: was in South Texas or the southern part of the
Speaker 1: hill Country, and when we live there, we reminded them that, look,
Speaker 1: you get to have fun, and Colorado exists, probably because
Speaker 1: Texans consider it North Texas and they vacation here. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't say that to anybody in Colorado and myself, you
Speaker 1: could say that, I wouldn't say that. I'll say this,
Speaker 1: there are traffic jams between Denver and the mountains because
Speaker 1: of Texans, is true? That is true? Absolutely. I want
Speaker 1: to I'm gonna start this off with some some easy
Speaker 1: questions and then I'm gonna start leaving it up to
Speaker 1: you like we did last time. Read the subjects. You
Speaker 1: see if you like it. I saw one on here
Speaker 1: that I thought that here we go. It's it's titled
Speaker 1: sports like, Oh, that's a great that's a great person,
Speaker 1: says hey grangdeer. I'm a big fan of your music
Speaker 1: and your YouTube channel. Thank you, It says, just wondering
Speaker 1: if you played any sports growing up. God bless you
Speaker 1: and your family, sincerely, Michelle, Thank you, Michelle, thanks for listening.
Speaker 1: Can I guess? Can I guess? Yeah? Do it? You
Speaker 1: strike me? Not a soccer player? Not a not a
Speaker 1: soccer player? You probably I'm gonna say baseball. You look
Speaker 1: like you could be a ballplayer. Yeah, yeah, maybe a
Speaker 1: football player definitely, but maybe basketball. I don't. You weren't
Speaker 1: a wrestler, that's right. Maybe track and field. I dabbled in,
Speaker 1: if I said enough to maybe cover my base, I
Speaker 1: dabbled enough, and and all of them as a kid,
Speaker 1: there's probably a lot of us did except basketball. I
Speaker 1: was terrible, terrible at basketball. Still am. Yeah, I can't.
Speaker 1: I cannot shoot a basket or dribble. I was mainly
Speaker 1: a football player, mainly a football player. It probably goes
Speaker 1: with the culture of where I was living in North Texas,
Speaker 1: and it's you know, there was in football there's no tryout.
Speaker 1: You just show up and if you if you could
Speaker 1: take it, if you could take the practices, then you're
Speaker 1: on the team, which is I think it's really cool
Speaker 1: about Texas football. I don't even know if that that
Speaker 1: probably is the same everywhere. But football is a sport
Speaker 1: that you don't try out for. You just show up,
Speaker 1: if you could, if you could hang, and if you
Speaker 1: last what through two a days and you're still there,
Speaker 1: and if you're still there, welcome to the team. Wow,
Speaker 1: we could use you. So is it were you offense
Speaker 1: or defense or played play defense. I played cornerback, which
Speaker 1: is probably why you thought you might have thought it
Speaker 1: was a baseball player because I don't have the size
Speaker 1: of alignment or a linebacker or running back. But I
Speaker 1: played cornerback and I loved it. It's an interesting question
Speaker 1: because I learned so much from junior high and high
Speaker 1: school football. We were so serious about football in my
Speaker 1: high school that our coaches actually didn't let us play
Speaker 1: anything else, or at least they really looked down on it.
Speaker 1: They would really look down on you playing another sport
Speaker 1: that you could possibly get injured in or take away
Speaker 1: from spring training or they except for track, track was
Speaker 1: like the one sport they encouraged because that actually helped
Speaker 1: your agility and your speed. And a lot of those
Speaker 1: guys coach track too. But soccer don't even think about it. No,
Speaker 1: I liked soccer as a little kid, but our football
Speaker 1: coach is no way they called it. If I could
Speaker 1: say that on this podcast, that's what they said, something
Speaker 1: Texans would say. I loved the sport of soccer. I
Speaker 1: really knew football is it's known everywhere else. How about you?
Speaker 1: So like you, I I played a lot of stuff
Speaker 1: as a little little kid. I think, you know, my
Speaker 1: mom wanted to get me exposed, and I think mostly
Speaker 1: just to keep me busy. I was put in camps
Speaker 1: like throughout the whole summer just so that I was
Speaker 1: using my energy up. I was. I enjoyed baseball the most,
Speaker 1: but I was the best at wrestling. I was a wrestler,
Speaker 1: and and then I in as I started to get older,
Speaker 1: I was into cross country and track because that was
Speaker 1: a better sport to facilitate wrestling, to build endurance and
Speaker 1: to maintain way. And so I was. I was a
Speaker 1: good wrestler, but I enjoyed baseball more. Good. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: could see that gear because I liked the way that
Speaker 1: my ears like the way God made them, and I
Speaker 1: didn't want them to change. You didn't want those little
Speaker 1: bubbles and all. Yeah, the cauliflower here, I man, that
Speaker 1: was I encourage anyone listening that's maybe thinking about should
Speaker 1: I get into something? I don't know. I think sports
Speaker 1: were such a such a big part of my life,
Speaker 1: and football because that's what I played, but the team
Speaker 1: sport aspect about it I learned. To this day, I
Speaker 1: will do things in my life that I know I
Speaker 1: learned from high school football, whether that's some kind of
Speaker 1: mental endurance or some kind of lesson I could get
Speaker 1: from a loss, you know, like losing crush to me.
Speaker 1: When I was in high school, I was the kid
Speaker 1: on the bus going back, just devastated and going over
Speaker 1: everything I did in my mind and reliving mistakes and
Speaker 1: to get better. And my parents could probably tell you
Speaker 1: they loved it because I would go in early, you know,
Speaker 1: and I would eat breakfast in the locker room, and
Speaker 1: I would start studying film, and then I would go
Speaker 1: through school, and then i'd go to practice after well,
Speaker 1: then i'd stay late make sure I had everything studied right.
Speaker 1: I didn't have time to go riff raff around in
Speaker 1: town because football took a lot of my mental energy.
Speaker 1: So if my parents ever wondered where I was in
Speaker 1: high school, I was in the locker room doing something. Well.
Speaker 1: You make a good point about the team work, the
Speaker 1: team sports versus individual sports. I think that's a very
Speaker 1: different experience because wrestling, I mean, we would train with
Speaker 1: other people, but it was very internally competitive, like you're
Speaker 1: competing for that top spot in that weight class, even
Speaker 1: within your team, and so there is an intensity there
Speaker 1: which I'm sure you see in other sports. But the
Speaker 1: baseball there was much more of a hey, we're in
Speaker 1: this together. There's a camaraderie in this. Everyone's got to
Speaker 1: do their job for this to work out, and even
Speaker 1: more so with football, everyone linemen to cornerback, everyone's got
Speaker 1: to play their position, every play a certain way for
Speaker 1: this thing to pan out. And it's pretty cool. And
Speaker 1: I tell so, I get a coach little league. Now,
Speaker 1: I catch I coach my kiddos, and I love it
Speaker 1: because I can see it now that sports, like a
Speaker 1: game and a season, is like a microcosm of life.
Speaker 1: If you go through emotional ups and downs, you face adversity,
Speaker 1: and one minute everything is awesome, and it can just
Speaker 1: change so quick, and you've got to emotionally how do
Speaker 1: you handle those ups and downs? And it's a great
Speaker 1: training ground, I think for all of us to deal
Speaker 1: with the ups and downs. And how are we when
Speaker 1: when everything's good? Are we a jerk when things are
Speaker 1: going well? And are we a jerk when they aren't?
Speaker 1: Do we blame others? Do we we own things that
Speaker 1: are our mistake and that we need to do better.
Speaker 1: Do we have a short memory about mistakes and so
Speaker 1: that we can move forward? Do we sacrifice for our teammates?
Speaker 1: There's so many cool things. So yes, if you're not
Speaker 1: in a sport, you should probably go find a sport.
Speaker 1: I agree. I have to tell a quick story about that.
Speaker 1: And I know that this is not what this podcast is,
Speaker 1: not about football or sports, but but I'll never forget.
Speaker 1: It was in ninth grade, and ninth grade for me
Speaker 1: was the end of junior high so that you know,
Speaker 1: we fed into high school. We went into high school
Speaker 1: in our sophomore year and there was two rival junior
Speaker 1: highs and we were both undefeated. And these these two
Speaker 1: junior highs both fed into our high school, so they
Speaker 1: were they were about to be our brothers next year,
Speaker 1: but not today. And we played the game at our
Speaker 1: high school field, so you know, it was like a
Speaker 1: big deal. We didn't play in the little junior high field.
Speaker 1: We played in the high school stadium first each other
Speaker 1: last game of the season, both undefeated, and they had
Speaker 1: this big old quarterback. His name is Sean Staley ended
Speaker 1: up playing quarterback for TCU. Big, you know, six seven
Speaker 1: legit dude. He could scramble, he could throw, and so
Speaker 1: they built up He ended up being our high school quarterback,
Speaker 1: which you know is a great friend. But they built
Speaker 1: this play for me. Our coach has built this play.
Speaker 1: It was a cornerback blitz and I would come in
Speaker 1: off the off the tackle and go backside and tack
Speaker 1: and sack him when he was looking the other way.
Speaker 1: And we had to call this. This play was if
Speaker 1: it triggered, if they brought out a certain formation that
Speaker 1: we knew, or they're going to roll out and I'd
Speaker 1: come in on the backside. And no one really expects
Speaker 1: the cornerback to blitz. That's but the safety would always
Speaker 1: protect the you know, if there was a tight end,
Speaker 1: the safety would roll over the top. So it was
Speaker 1: a trick play basically, So we called it, and I
Speaker 1: remember my heart was pounding because I knew they came
Speaker 1: out in this formation. The coaches gave the signal from
Speaker 1: the sideline. I knew this is it. My heart was pounding,
Speaker 1: like here we go. I've been practicing. So we got
Speaker 1: off the ball and I ended up sacking him. He
Speaker 1: didn't even see me coming because it was from the backside.
Speaker 1: So I was just on cloud nine. You know. The
Speaker 1: crowd was excited, they were cheering, and I said, who
Speaker 1: is great. There's a ninth grade kid, you know, a
Speaker 1: pimple faced kid. And it was a big game. Was
Speaker 1: one of the biggest days of my life at the time.
Speaker 1: So second half comes out and it's a close game.
Speaker 1: I don't remember the score, and they come out in
Speaker 1: that formation again, same call. Coach gives me the signal.
Speaker 1: So this this formation only happens if they're tight, if
Speaker 1: they have a tight end, right obviously, So that's what
Speaker 1: they did. Here's what I didn't know, and they knew.
Speaker 1: They knew this, and they talked about it at halftime.
Speaker 1: So they came out with a trick play on their own,
Speaker 1: and they rolled out ten men onto the field. And
Speaker 1: the eleventh man was the wide receiver hidden on the
Speaker 1: sideline with the coach just standing there looking like he's talking,
Speaker 1: looking like he's talking to the coach, but he's also
Speaker 1: standing next to the ref who was in on it
Speaker 1: at the time. So they got up to the line
Speaker 1: and I'm only thinking about, oh, here we go, there's
Speaker 1: another cornerback blitz. So I line up and just at
Speaker 1: the right time, that receiver stepped off the sideline into
Speaker 1: a wide receiver spot. They snapped the ball. The quarterback
Speaker 1: knew what I was doing. I'm the only one that
Speaker 1: didn't know what was going on. And he's wide open.
Speaker 1: Long bomb just sailed, just a nice little toss, just
Speaker 1: an easy catch, touchdown. Crowd on their side goes nuts.
Speaker 1: I just fell. I was just so of course, my coaches,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I'd have to talk to him. They
Speaker 1: acted like they saw it, like Granger Smith, come on, man, Smith,
Speaker 1: keep your head on a swivel. Do you see what
Speaker 1: they're doing? And evidently they were. Yet they saw it.
Speaker 1: Evidently you know, yeah, they're probably my age now, you know,
Speaker 1: back then, So I then, but then what happens, to
Speaker 1: my point, what happens you go to the huddle and
Speaker 1: you gotta go back and play another play, you know,
Speaker 1: because they it was. It was totally devastating to me,
Speaker 1: and I learned, and then throughout high school, I always looked.
Speaker 1: I always looked to my left. I've played on left
Speaker 1: cornerback side, I always looked to my left, check for
Speaker 1: the receiver. Second, I always looked, or I would count
Speaker 1: when you do eleven, they're all out here. I never
Speaker 1: let that happen again. So thank you, Michelle. I know
Speaker 1: there's a long answer, but I'm passionate about that stuff.
Speaker 1: So Chad, I'm gonna sart. I'm gonna start rolling you
Speaker 1: with these. We have toughest God question never answered. We
Speaker 1: have beliefs, food for thought, fifty five years young. We
Speaker 1: have a four pastor, Chad. We have please help getting married,
Speaker 1: cheating brother in law, trouble with girls, my wife and
Speaker 1: I are thinking about moving. I should probably stop at
Speaker 1: that point about you. There's like four or five solid
Speaker 1: you have to answer those. I think I'm kind of
Speaker 1: leaning towards pastor Chad, since okay, we'll start. You're here,
Speaker 1: I don't want to skip that one and then we
Speaker 1: get onto something else, and wish we had, so it says,
Speaker 1: how do you from Oklahoma? It says, I'm going to
Speaker 1: make this as short as possible. Third commandment, shall not
Speaker 1: take the Lord's name in vain. Giving that commandment, my
Speaker 1: soul is lost forever. Right, That's what I've been told
Speaker 1: in the past. Haven't been to church since Marine Corps
Speaker 1: boot camp in two thousand and seven. I listened to
Speaker 1: Amber's Arise every Sunday, the Chosen show first time I
Speaker 1: bench watched it and send it to Amber because I
Speaker 1: knew she could spread that farther than me. I just
Speaker 1: feel completely lost as to the times I have cursed
Speaker 1: God for so many many things. I don't know what
Speaker 1: kind of help can be provided, but anything would be helpful.
Speaker 1: I suppose that comes from Jason. Okay, so you've got
Speaker 1: a lot there. Yeah, Jason, thank you for your service
Speaker 1: of serving the Marine Corps. Thank you for listening and
Speaker 1: caring to email and this compelling your heart to email
Speaker 1: us in and shout out to Oklahoma. This question is
Speaker 1: is going to be. It's complex, but it's a lot
Speaker 1: simpler than you think. It's a lot simpler than you think.
Speaker 1: You want to start this, Chad, Yeah, I mean, at
Speaker 1: first I caught their the third commandment, taking the Lord's
Speaker 1: name in vain. I caught in their question about does
Speaker 1: that mean eternal damnation? Like is he sid duck there?
Speaker 1: Given that commandment, my soul is lost forever. That's what
Speaker 1: I've been told in the past. And then he goes
Speaker 1: on to say, I have taken the Lord's name many
Speaker 1: many times in vain. Yeah. So you can get caught
Speaker 1: up in the mistakes that you make and the ways
Speaker 1: that you failed. But one of the things that we
Speaker 1: as we read through the New Testament we understand why
Speaker 1: Christ came and who he is, is that he came
Speaker 1: not to change the law, but to perfectly fulfill the law.
Speaker 1: We also learned that the law is there to show
Speaker 1: us that we need a savior, that we do fall short.
Speaker 1: And the scripture says all have sinned and fall short
Speaker 1: of the glory of God, and that the wages of
Speaker 1: sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal
Speaker 1: life in Christ Jesus. So I'm walking through Romans right now,
Speaker 1: Romans three, Romans six, and in Romans eight. There is
Speaker 1: no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. James
Speaker 1: says that no one can claim that they are without sin,
Speaker 1: so that we're all in the same boat that you describe.
Speaker 1: We're all in a boat that man. We have done
Speaker 1: way too much, thought too much that we could ever
Speaker 1: nationalized before a perfect and holy God that he should
Speaker 1: let us in. However, that's not where the story ends,
Speaker 1: or not left in our brokenness. But Christ Jesus entered
Speaker 1: the picture so that he could he could transfer his
Speaker 1: perfect life and fulfillment of the law and take on
Speaker 1: God's wrath on our behalf. And so even though yes,
Speaker 1: all of us, no one can claim to be in
Speaker 1: a place of perfection. No one has done it right perfectly,
Speaker 1: or thought it right perfectly, or spoken it right perfectly.
Speaker 1: And so that feeling, that tension that you feel is
Speaker 1: a it's actually a good tension. Yeah. Yeah, it's a
Speaker 1: place of humility and a place that you go, I
Speaker 1: can't do this, and you're absolutely right, you can't exactly
Speaker 1: where you need to be. So you've let me just
Speaker 1: be straight up, Jason. You've been told wrong. You have
Speaker 1: been told wrong, you have been told that you're there's
Speaker 1: no turning back from what you've done. Basically, now, what
Speaker 1: what you're right about it is you're completely lost, you
Speaker 1: are completely lost. That's the right place you need to be,
Speaker 1: because we all essentially are completely lost. If we're not lost,
Speaker 1: we don't need to be found. There's no point in
Speaker 1: the story of Jesus Christ, the gospel message, there's no
Speaker 1: point if we're not lost we need. You can't be
Speaker 1: saved unless you have a reason to be saved. You
Speaker 1: don't need a savior unless you need saving. So Jason,
Speaker 1: you're You're right where you need to be. And the
Speaker 1: other thing I want to say is you can't take
Speaker 1: one commandment and act like there's not nine others you know?
Speaker 1: Have you not ever lied? Have you not ever stolen anything,
Speaker 1: not even if it could be, not even physical? Have
Speaker 1: you always obeyed your parents? Have you loved the Lord
Speaker 1: your God with all your heart and soul, might and strength?
Speaker 1: Have you done that? I think you probably have broken
Speaker 1: them all. I think we've broken we've all broken all
Speaker 1: of them. I mean even murder. Have you hated your brother?
Speaker 1: You've committed murder? So we've broken them all. So you can't.
Speaker 1: You can't take one. And honestly, shame on anyone that
Speaker 1: pointed one out to you and said you've done that.
Speaker 1: I've heard you say this. I've heard you say the
Speaker 1: Lord's name in vain many times, and you are eternally damned. Brother,
Speaker 1: you were already eternally damned before you said that. That's
Speaker 1: why you needed a savior. And that's why Chad is
Speaker 1: saying in the New Testament, when Jesus Christ comes to
Speaker 1: the earth and fulfills the law and takes the place
Speaker 1: of that that sin that we're full of, we're all
Speaker 1: wretched sinners. He took the place of that for you
Speaker 1: so that in return you believe in him and give
Speaker 1: everything back to him and say, Jesus can't, I can't,
Speaker 1: I can't do this. I am lost. Take me, let
Speaker 1: me follow you. And that's the story of the Gospel. Amen.
Speaker 1: So good word back. That's it we got. Let's do
Speaker 1: one more in this in this session. I have alcoholic
Speaker 1: veteran needs help. I have faith in friends, I have
Speaker 1: What would you do if you're seventeen and your parents
Speaker 1: are trying to destroy your relationship? Any of these pop
Speaker 1: out to you? Do you? You mentioned one that I'm
Speaker 1: sure other people heard, toughest question, toughest God question. That's intriguing,
Speaker 1: right it is? Now? I read this before before we started,
Speaker 1: I skimmed it, and it's a tough one. But let
Speaker 1: me say that sometimes what I learned through reading y'all's
Speaker 1: questions is there's a lot of people asking the same question,
Speaker 1: just putting different words in it. But we're all living
Speaker 1: something in here. And then you guys make it specific
Speaker 1: to your life, but the answers you're probably going to
Speaker 1: be very similar. That says Hey, Grangeer, I love watching you.
Speaker 1: Blessings to all. The question that I asked I said here,
Speaker 1: he says, I send it this email a few days ago.
Speaker 1: If God watches over all of his children, then why
Speaker 1: wasn't I watched over? I was subject to all forms
Speaker 1: of abuse via my foster family for the last seventeen years.
Speaker 1: Still to this day, this question has never been answered. Well,
Speaker 1: before I go any further, DJ, we're about to answer
Speaker 1: it for your brother, says, yes, I survived. My blood
Speaker 1: brother couldn't handle it. So there it is, Grangeer, my
Speaker 1: ultimate question. Thanks for your time in advance. So here's
Speaker 1: the question, and you're saying it's never been answered, and
Speaker 1: I love that you've said that, and I love that
Speaker 1: you've you've given us the opportunity. But essentially, he's saying,
Speaker 1: if God watches over all his children, why I wasn't
Speaker 1: I watched over right? And And that's you know, you
Speaker 1: could reward it and say, if there is a God,
Speaker 1: and why is there pain in the world, why didn't
Speaker 1: he stop it? And if you can't stop it, then
Speaker 1: he's not God. And if he won't stop it, then
Speaker 1: he's a mean God. And I don't want any part
Speaker 1: of that, right. That's that's the theology of that, I think,
Speaker 1: or the philosophy of that, thinking where would you start
Speaker 1: with that? Chaed First of all, I want to say,
Speaker 1: there's no theological answer is going to remove just the
Speaker 1: the reality of probably how much pain you experienced and
Speaker 1: the fact that your brother and and the emotional struggles
Speaker 1: that you've had through that that's real, yeah, And and
Speaker 1: that pain is lasting, and that that can that try
Speaker 1: can linger and have huge effects. And so I want
Speaker 1: to recognize that that is very, very real and not
Speaker 1: try to minimize that where I tend to because there's
Speaker 1: two parts to it. There's the idea that God sees
Speaker 1: and does nothing, and so there's this this assumption that
Speaker 1: he doesn't care. Right, So then people say, well, if
Speaker 1: this is happening, and then he must not be there
Speaker 1: or he must not care. And it's that kind of
Speaker 1: philosophical problem of evil, right, How can evil exist when
Speaker 1: there's an all loving, all powerful God, Because if he's
Speaker 1: all loving, he would want to stop it. If he's
Speaker 1: all powerful, he could stop it. But yet evil persists.
Speaker 1: And I don't know if we've I feel like we've
Speaker 1: touched on that component before, but not directly related to
Speaker 1: this kind of abuse. And the reality is such that
Speaker 1: it isn't as though God prescribes abuse, and it certainly
Speaker 1: isn't the case that he likes it or turns an
Speaker 1: eye away from it and doesn't care. That would be
Speaker 1: to misunderstand who God is and his character. I think
Speaker 1: that there is also the reality of human sin, and
Speaker 1: that we live in a fallen and extremely broken world.
Speaker 1: And so while yes, God does see, he is in
Speaker 1: a place where he sees all of creation, and he
Speaker 1: is deeply troubled by the amount of sin and the
Speaker 1: effects of sin on this creation. But it's also the
Speaker 1: case that he's created the conditions where we live in
Speaker 1: a fallen world. These are the conditions that we humanity
Speaker 1: have caused. But he is a god that has also
Speaker 1: created the conditions for love. And since love only true
Speaker 1: love can be experienced through choice when I have the ability,
Speaker 1: like if I am in a relationship with my wife
Speaker 1: and she is required to be in that relationship and
Speaker 1: she is coerced into that relationship, that is not love,
Speaker 1: but the fact that she chooses, and that I choose
Speaker 1: to sacrifice other things because I want to love her
Speaker 1: and serve her, then love can happen. But it can't
Speaker 1: happen if it's coursed and if there's no alternative. And
Speaker 1: so we are in a world where the conditions of
Speaker 1: love exist because there's choice to do so, which also
Speaker 1: means there's the option and choice to not love, to abuse,
Speaker 1: to hate, to carry out all kinds of evil. And
Speaker 1: it's not a situation that God looks down and is
Speaker 1: indifferent to. And we know that, and we come back
Speaker 1: to the gospel. He is. God is familiar with abuse
Speaker 1: and betrayal because He has taken on human form and
Speaker 1: identified with every component of it. Absolutely dj these stories,
Speaker 1: just like yours, are in that book that we're talking about,
Speaker 1: and a collective read of the Bible I know. And
Speaker 1: let me just say this, sometimes when when you hear
Speaker 1: me say read the Bible. You might think you kind
Speaker 1: of can't really read that thing, right, It's like a big,
Speaker 1: boring book. You can't. It's not made for reading. It's
Speaker 1: just made for like pulling out coffee mug phrases here
Speaker 1: and there and putting them on the wall. Precious, precious moments,
Speaker 1: precious moments. And so before that, and I still I
Speaker 1: still kind of unraveled this in my mind exactly what
Speaker 1: to say, but what I think it is, it has
Speaker 1: to it's somewhere in this world. It's you, Dja getting
Speaker 1: getting in a quiet place on your knees. And Chad
Speaker 1: and I talked about this before the podcast on another subject,
Speaker 1: and you saying, God, I've seen you work through other people.
Speaker 1: I haven't felt it in my life, to be honest,
Speaker 1: I don't even know if you're if you're listening, but
Speaker 1: I want to feel that hunger. I don't want to
Speaker 1: do this anymore. I don't want to. I don't want to.
Speaker 1: Just like I said in the last question, I don't
Speaker 1: want to take control of my life anymore because I can,
Speaker 1: I'm not very good at it, and it only leads
Speaker 1: to suffering. Make me hungry for that save me from this.
Speaker 1: And then you open up that Bible and you start
Speaker 1: You could start anywhere, start at John one. It's a
Speaker 1: good place to start. And as you start reading it
Speaker 1: with that kind of reverence, that kind of humility, that
Speaker 1: kind of introduction to it, you start reading those pages
Speaker 1: and you go that story actually sounds similar to me.
Speaker 1: I mean, these guys were persecuted and they suffered, and
Speaker 1: they went through loss, and they went through terrible things.
Speaker 1: But God didn't stop it. He delivered them through it.
Speaker 1: And there's a big difference when you get delivered through
Speaker 1: the fire. Could he stop it? He could, he could,
Speaker 1: But what would you get out of it? What would
Speaker 1: anyone get if the fire stopped. It's so much more
Speaker 1: powerful to say he guided me through it, through the flames,
Speaker 1: as the building was burning, He took me through it,
Speaker 1: and we made it all the way. He delivered me.
Speaker 1: And you learn so much more about yourself and about humanity.
Speaker 1: Because I imagine a world that's in perfect bliss, there's nothing,
Speaker 1: there's nothing wrong with it. How would you ever see good?
Speaker 1: How would good even exist? How would you know what
Speaker 1: a good day was if you didn't have a bad day,
Speaker 1: How would you know how beautiful the sunshine is, or
Speaker 1: how would you know how if it rained every day
Speaker 1: you would even know that there was a beautiful sunshine,
Speaker 1: or vice versa. But without that contrast. I heard it
Speaker 1: put this one time. It was put this way. Evil
Speaker 1: is evil of the earth. Is like the cancer in
Speaker 1: the body. But the body exists before the cancer. If
Speaker 1: you take away the cancer, you still have a body,
Speaker 1: and it's a healed body. But if you take away
Speaker 1: the body, there is no cancer. It doesn't exist. Evil
Speaker 1: doesn't exist without the goods. You have to have the good.
Speaker 1: So there's good in your world and there's evil in
Speaker 1: your world. But as soon as you realize that, and
Speaker 1: you go reverently to that word and just say, God,
Speaker 1: take I don't want this anymore. I don't want to
Speaker 1: deal with this anymore. I can't. I want to take
Speaker 1: it to you. Give me that hunger and then watch
Speaker 1: the power. Watch that super actual power come over you.
Speaker 1: Some of you are listening on this is this is mumbo, jentlemen.
Speaker 1: This is getting weird for me. Okay, it happened to me,
Speaker 1: It happened to Chad, it happened to a lot of people,
Speaker 1: and and and there's there's evidence of this throughout history,
Speaker 1: because there is a power in that word, and he
Speaker 1: will deliver you through it, and then your story will
Speaker 1: become your power through it, like your story what you've
Speaker 1: gone through becomes your testimony, which becomes so powerful to others.
Speaker 1: There's somebody else out there, DJ that's going through similar
Speaker 1: things to you, And if you get in and get
Speaker 1: into the word and be and are delivered through the flames,
Speaker 1: then you could turn to that person and go, I
Speaker 1: can get you. I could help you. I could show you.
Speaker 1: I'm one beggar telling another beggar where the bread is,
Speaker 1: and I could tell you where the bread is going
Speaker 1: to take quick break bear Back decompressed. The podcast today
Speaker 1: with mister Chad is brought to you by EE Apparel.
Speaker 1: I just talked to Parker and he said, make sure
Speaker 1: you tell everybody that we're restocking leggings. I guess those
Speaker 1: are really really popular, and they were out of stock
Speaker 1: for a long time after the last launch. They're back
Speaker 1: in stock. So I never thought that this apparel company
Speaker 1: would have popular leggings. That's not really what I thought
Speaker 1: when we first started selling hats and t shirts. But
Speaker 1: evidently leggings are super popular. And ours. Amber had worked
Speaker 1: a long time to find the exact kind of leggings
Speaker 1: that girls like, and that the right material they I
Speaker 1: guess the material last forever. Apparently this is all coming
Speaker 1: from Amber because she tested so many different kinds before
Speaker 1: they manufactured the exact kind that she liked. And I
Speaker 1: guess there's a certain way that they could make these
Speaker 1: that actually fit right too. I mean maybe like the
Speaker 1: waist doesn't come up too high or not too low,
Speaker 1: and like the ankles or the nice length. Though apparently
Speaker 1: they're back in stock and they're doing they're really popular,
Speaker 1: so I want to tell you about that. I also
Speaker 1: want to tell you that with Father's Day coming up,
Speaker 1: we just went outside and Parker showed me we have
Speaker 1: a new Father's Day shirt. It's called Top Dad and
Speaker 1: it's pretty cool. I was talking to Parker and I
Speaker 1: was like, this is actually the perfect gift for someone
Speaker 1: that's looking to buy dad something that's ayee fan and
Speaker 1: they don't know what else to get them. Maybe dad
Speaker 1: has everything. Well, this is an an exclusive shirt to
Speaker 1: twenty twenty one that's a top Dad shirt that it
Speaker 1: looks really cool and I think your dad's going to
Speaker 1: like it. I don't think dads are going to go
Speaker 1: just buy it on their own. But I think it's
Speaker 1: the perfect gift for a kid or a teen or
Speaker 1: a young adult, or a wife or a parent to
Speaker 1: buy their kid. That's a dad this shirt. So I
Speaker 1: want to tell you about that. Also, as always, if
Speaker 1: you need to get a hold of me, if you
Speaker 1: want to hear from me personally, then you can go
Speaker 1: to Cameo dot Com. It's also an app called Cameo
Speaker 1: c am Eo. It's a great way to connect with me.
Speaker 1: You could get me to say anything on a video message,
Speaker 1: and it's a video message specific to you. So it
Speaker 1: could be a birthday or happy anniversary, or congratulations or
Speaker 1: I'm sorry you're going through this, whatever it might be.
Speaker 1: You have done all different kinds. I could even do
Speaker 1: a cameo to you if you just want one for yourself.
Speaker 1: I've seen those two Cameo dot com or the app
Speaker 1: Cameo search for Granger Smith. I'm easy to find and
Speaker 1: I'll get you back to the podcast with Chad. All right,
Speaker 1: Chad digging in here. We have food for thought, belief,
Speaker 1: we have a please help getting married? How about we
Speaker 1: do that one? Okay, you do a lot of marriage counseling.
Speaker 1: That's one of your mini specialties. If you guys have
Speaker 1: an email, I always say that if you have a question,
Speaker 1: email Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com. Anything you want
Speaker 1: to ask, We have Chad Warren. Today's awesome at answering
Speaker 1: these questions. So this one says I had to grangeur.
Speaker 1: My name is Bryce, I'm thirty years old. I live
Speaker 1: in Spring, Texas. I'm a fellow Aggie class of twenty thirteen. Whoop.
Speaker 1: I wanted to you guys make noises. We make noises. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I wanted to start by saying thank you. Your music
Speaker 1: has been a light for me during some dark times.
Speaker 1: Thank you buddy so much. That means a lot. It says,
Speaker 1: I have a question for you. I've been in a
Speaker 1: relationship with a woman of my dreams for a little
Speaker 1: over four years. We recently got engaged when I proposed
Speaker 1: on New Year's on top of enchanted rock. Her family
Speaker 1: loves me and my family loves her. Do you have
Speaker 1: any practical advice for us leading up to the wedding
Speaker 1: and for when we become newlyweds? Can you help Can
Speaker 1: you help them with that? Jed uh, Yeah, I have
Speaker 1: a few things that I tell couples in your exact situation,
Speaker 1: if I would encourage you to consider pre marital counseling,
Speaker 1: And that doesn't imply that somehow, you guys, there's you know,
Speaker 1: your relationship is broken, but it is. There are a
Speaker 1: lot of pastors and folks that do that where they
Speaker 1: help a couple prior to marriage just think through and
Speaker 1: ask questions that are going to help them process through
Speaker 1: stuff so that when they they become one and they
Speaker 1: start sharing life together and in the same house and
Speaker 1: sharing the same breath, and they're they're just sharing time
Speaker 1: and everything, they've wrestled through some of those major areas
Speaker 1: of life where and they have some common ground and
Speaker 1: some clarity on what that's going to look like. So
Speaker 1: I always like to ask couples question like if you're
Speaker 1: if you were to close your eyes and you know
Speaker 1: you're you're ninety five years old and your marriage is
Speaker 1: wildly successful, what does it look like? What what are
Speaker 1: the who's around you? Who do you see in the
Speaker 1: picture at that point? What what are those people experiencing
Speaker 1: Because your marriage has been so successful and that what
Speaker 1: that helps you kind of gain an understanding a vision
Speaker 1: of picture of where this thing could end up and
Speaker 1: then you work back from there. Okay, if that's where
Speaker 1: we want to be, and it's helpful for a couple
Speaker 1: to think, do their pictures line up? Do you see
Speaker 1: the same thing when you think that many years down
Speaker 1: the road and success in marriage has occurred. Because if
Speaker 1: you don't have the same picture of what this thing
Speaker 1: looks like when it's successful, that's a great topic to converse,
Speaker 1: you know, and think through and process through as a couple.
Speaker 1: But if you do have pretty similar vision for what
Speaker 1: success in marriage would look like, and then you work
Speaker 1: your way back to okay, then what can we do
Speaker 1: every day? If we were to wake up and do
Speaker 1: one thing that would help us move in that direction,
Speaker 1: what would that be? What would it look like for
Speaker 1: us to every day go okay, if I just do
Speaker 1: this every day, then that's going to start to help me.
Speaker 1: And then developing some common ground on the area of kids.
Speaker 1: Do we want to have kids, how many do we
Speaker 1: schooling of kids, discipline of kids, working through how are
Speaker 1: we going to make decisions? What if one of you
Speaker 1: gets a job somewhere else and one of you loves
Speaker 1: your job here, how do you make decisions that are
Speaker 1: going to affect and so understanding what is your overall Yes,
Speaker 1: what's that long term vision? Where do you want to
Speaker 1: head with with this thing? And that's going to help
Speaker 1: you in those decision times. So those are just a
Speaker 1: few things. Is there a resource online resource with what
Speaker 1: you're kind of what you're saying and some of those
Speaker 1: those questions, those are all great things. Yeah, I'm sure
Speaker 1: there are online resources for that. Yeah. These are things
Speaker 1: that I've just kind of developed as I've worked with couples.
Speaker 1: And there's a book out there. What's it called. I
Speaker 1: think it's by it's by John Piper, He's a pastor
Speaker 1: here in the US, and I think it's called Preparing
Speaker 1: for Marriage and he has some very helpful things to
Speaker 1: consider it as a couple. And in the back, actually
Speaker 1: there's a long list of questions to kind of think
Speaker 1: through as a couple as you're preparing for marriage. So
Speaker 1: I would say that I would say everything Chad said,
Speaker 1: put your effort there and not on the flowers and
Speaker 1: the band and the arrangements of the wedding. That stuff.
Speaker 1: It's cool, but it just goes You'll just fly right by.
Speaker 1: You know, you're not even going to really even notice
Speaker 1: it because it's it's just a blink of an eye.
Speaker 1: And I know it's important to her, and I know
Speaker 1: it's important to a lot of people. But focus on
Speaker 1: what Chad's saying, those relationship building things, those things that
Speaker 1: really matter. I mean, we're looking at a world that
Speaker 1: gets divorced, what fifty percent of the time though, or
Speaker 1: something like that, So I think you could say that
Speaker 1: fifty of those divorces all had really awesome ceremonies. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and a lot of really cool flowers. So we have
Speaker 1: to focus on what matters. The world depends on it
Speaker 1: right now. So thank you, Bryce, buddy, thank you for emailing.
Speaker 1: Let's talk about what do you think trouble with girls
Speaker 1: work decision. We have a couple of I need some advice.
Speaker 1: We have alcoholic veteran needs help. In all caps, it's
Speaker 1: so hard to go through some of these and yeah,
Speaker 1: imagine one of them that was really important. We'll get
Speaker 1: to all of them eventually. Guys, work decision, it seems
Speaker 1: like a topic that's kind of more diverse. Says Hey Granger.
Speaker 1: It's Jen from Maryland and I need help. I have
Speaker 1: a job making thirty dollars an hour, but now I
Speaker 1: have a county job with benefits. I'm sorry, I'm trying
Speaker 1: to read this right, but now I have a county
Speaker 1: job with benefits. Retirement is available for twenty five an hour.
Speaker 1: The thirty dollars job has me waiting on a clearance.
Speaker 1: What should I do? I never burn a bridge, and
Speaker 1: both offer me opportunities. I'm thinking of the long haul,
Speaker 1: but I fear of change, so let me. I work
Speaker 1: through these as you guys hear them, so I don't
Speaker 1: rewrite these. I apologize for what I'm saying here, but
Speaker 1: let me read this. I have a job making thirty
Speaker 1: dollars an hour. Okay, okay, I got it. I got it.
Speaker 1: I have a job make it thirty dollars an hour.
Speaker 1: But now a county job with benefits is available for me.
Speaker 1: So there's job for the current job, and there's job
Speaker 1: B the potential available for twenty five. So we're looking
Speaker 1: at one for less money, but it has retirement available
Speaker 1: and it has benefits. It's a county job. So she's saying,
Speaker 1: I don't want to burn a bridge, and I like
Speaker 1: both opportunities, and I'm thinking about the long haul, but
Speaker 1: the fear of change is within me. Thank you, Jen.
Speaker 1: Thanks shout out to Marylyn. Sometimes I look back on
Speaker 1: these podcasts and I'm like, can you even read Granger?
Speaker 1: But I'm to be with you sometimes sometimes, y'all, I
Speaker 1: just read it the way you sent it to me.
Speaker 1: You were just in the locker room a lot, but
Speaker 1: in the library. Oh was it learning how to read
Speaker 1: very well? Jen? This this question, I think you answered it.
Speaker 1: I think you say I'm in it for the long haul,
Speaker 1: so I think you're you're probably wanting to go to
Speaker 1: it sounds like what is more stable with benefits and
Speaker 1: a retirement package available for five dollars less an hour.
Speaker 1: I'd be curious to know if that five dollars an
Speaker 1: hour doesn't kind of work itself out in the fact
Speaker 1: that one has benefits and one doesn't, because I wonder
Speaker 1: how much you're having to invest in retirement and health
Speaker 1: insurance and whatever, dental and vision and all kinds of
Speaker 1: other benefits that come with it. I would have to
Speaker 1: think there you could do kind of a cost benefit
Speaker 1: versus you know, And I don't think there's anything wrong
Speaker 1: with being completely honest with your current boss. You say
Speaker 1: you don't want to burn a bridge. I don't think
Speaker 1: there's anything wrong with you walking in there and just saying,
Speaker 1: mister boss, I need to tell you something. I love
Speaker 1: this job and I appreciate the opportunity. I want to
Speaker 1: tell you about a new offer I got that i'm
Speaker 1: considering taking. And here it is. I say this in
Speaker 1: complete respect to you and this job, and I don't
Speaker 1: want to burn a bridge, but I'm trying to do
Speaker 1: what's best for me and my family right now. Maybe
Speaker 1: you could help me with this or help me to understand,
Speaker 1: but I appreciate this opportunity. It's just complete vulnerable honesty
Speaker 1: with your boss. It's not gonna it shouldn't burn a bridge,
Speaker 1: and if it does, he's not the right boss anyway. Right,
Speaker 1: Let's just let's be honest. And I would say, follow
Speaker 1: your gut and take option too. That's from what I
Speaker 1: could see here. I think that's I think that's where
Speaker 1: you're gonna go. That's good cheating brother in law to
Speaker 1: the first this is hey, Granger and guest, it's kind
Speaker 1: of disrespectful to you, Chad. I believe well, I am
Speaker 1: a guest. I am a guest. I'm okay with that.
Speaker 1: So they'll keep my name confidential. In this topic. But
Speaker 1: here's the issue I'm struggling with. I have a close
Speaker 1: friend with my brother in law. I have a close
Speaker 1: friendship with my brother in law, and sometimes it's too
Speaker 1: close for my comfort. He has told me about the
Speaker 1: times he's cheated on his wife with my wife's sister
Speaker 1: while I reach out while I'm out on a bachelor
Speaker 1: party trips, or while he's out of bachelor party trips
Speaker 1: and out of town. I'm sorry for my reading today.
Speaker 1: It's getting worse. My brother in law and his wife
Speaker 1: have had They have two kids together under five. It
Speaker 1: hurts me deep inside as I find his actions completely unacceptable,
Speaker 1: and I don't want to I don't want to be
Speaker 1: the one to say something. I am on a open
Speaker 1: with my wife and told her about a recent trip
Speaker 1: he told me about, and now she is stressing me
Speaker 1: out on how to handle this as well. We don't
Speaker 1: want to be the bearer of bad news and cause
Speaker 1: a train wreck. But it also hurts us to know
Speaker 1: this kind of information without saying anything, and she finds
Speaker 1: out more than likely. If she finds out more than likely,
Speaker 1: he will know immediately who said something. So I do
Speaker 1: worry about trying to save my brother in law from
Speaker 1: hating me or telling my sister in law what I
Speaker 1: feel she should know. Give it to me campfire style,
Speaker 1: would you? Jason? I like that campfire style. I mean, Chad,
Speaker 1: you're you're you're good at this. You're good at this.
Speaker 1: So I'm glad you're my guest today. I'm serious, I'm serious.
Speaker 1: I don't exactly know what to say, but I know
Speaker 1: that you probably do. Can we recap this real quick? Yeah?
Speaker 1: So what I've heard is we've the writer here who
Speaker 1: has submitted the question. He's got a good friendship with
Speaker 1: his brother in law, and through that friendship, the brother
Speaker 1: in law has confided in him times that the brother
Speaker 1: in law has been unfaithful with the wife the brother
Speaker 1: in law's wife. Okay, so he's cheated on his wife, yeah,
Speaker 1: and he's confided in our Yes, And it sounds like
Speaker 1: multiple times, because they said while out on a Bauchler
Speaker 1: of party trips or out of town, so it sounds
Speaker 1: like multiple partners, multiple Okay, So there's yeah. I can't
Speaker 1: get the sense whether it's just happened in the past
Speaker 1: and it's no longer a thing, or there's this it
Speaker 1: sounds like because there's an upcoming trip or a recent
Speaker 1: trip that there's a potential that this is kind of
Speaker 1: a thing, this is an ongoing thing, And so the
Speaker 1: dilemma is save face with this guy, save the friendship,
Speaker 1: or tell your wife's sister and ruin your relationship with
Speaker 1: him and cause a bunch of ruffled feathers in the family.
Speaker 1: That's the decision. Yeah, I would say there's a couple
Speaker 1: of things to consider. The the what's of higher value?
Speaker 1: Is it this friendship that you have with the brother
Speaker 1: in law? Is that of highest value? Is is it
Speaker 1: the kind of the veil of a healthy marriage that
Speaker 1: they seem to have, which they do not have a
Speaker 1: healthy marriage? If this is a ongoing thing, and is
Speaker 1: that something that you want to help facilitate, because right
Speaker 1: now you are now aware of the dysfunction, and now
Speaker 1: as you determined to be silent about it, then you
Speaker 1: are going to help your helping to facilitate the veil
Speaker 1: of something that seems healthy, but is it incredibly destructive underneath?
Speaker 1: And so you've got to determine what's the highest priority here.
Speaker 1: And my encouragement is, as hard as it may be,
Speaker 1: confront your brother in law about it. This is camp
Speaker 1: fire style. Okay, it doesn't mean it's easy, but confront
Speaker 1: the brother in law about this infidelity and that he
Speaker 1: comes clean with his wife. And you can even put
Speaker 1: a timeline, like you need to tell her by such
Speaker 1: and such time, or I'm going to because if ten
Speaker 1: twenty thirty years down the road it all comes to light,
Speaker 1: Because it most likely will, something will happen to where
Speaker 1: she becomes aware and when she finds out that you've
Speaker 1: known all along, imagine that condition. Good point. That is
Speaker 1: not a situation that you can you can defend. Good point.
Speaker 1: I love that answer, and I'm supporting it fully. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I hadn't thought about that, because it will come to light.
Speaker 1: You're right. We see this play out. Either he'll slip up,
Speaker 1: or his conscience will make him feel so guilty you
Speaker 1: can't stand it anymore, or she'll catch him. And it
Speaker 1: sounds like it's even having an impact on your marriage
Speaker 1: because your wife is starting to put pressure on you.
Speaker 1: His wife wants it to come to light. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: her sister. Yeah absolutely, And so as you continue to
Speaker 1: harbor this darkness and not walk in the light and
Speaker 1: not be truthful about it, it is going to have
Speaker 1: an impact on you. It will affect your marriage, and
Speaker 1: it's just going to be something that's there in festering
Speaker 1: and growing and when it comes to light, you're going
Speaker 1: to be on the hook. Yeah, you have to. You
Speaker 1: can't defend why you've you've harbored that. I love that, Chad.
Speaker 1: And and here's say, here's a big factor to this too.
Speaker 1: And I like how you say put a deadline on it. Well,
Speaker 1: here's part of your deadline. There's two kids under the
Speaker 1: age of five that don't understand this yet, and in
Speaker 1: three or four or five more years they will fully
Speaker 1: understand this. So I think you need to look at
Speaker 1: it is that this is a ticking clock to keep
Speaker 1: these kids from from understanding right now and not finding
Speaker 1: out real time when they're you know, my daughter's nine.
Speaker 1: She fully understands the world at age nine. So I
Speaker 1: would put I would put a time constraint on protecting
Speaker 1: these kids. I mean that these kids are going to
Speaker 1: be hurt, it's some some way, but we could we
Speaker 1: could limit that pain on them if we deal with
Speaker 1: this quickly and not let it happen. Because he got
Speaker 1: caught and the kids hear about it and they understand
Speaker 1: or it happens more and more times, or somebody gets pregnant.
Speaker 1: You know, there's there's a million other little avenues we
Speaker 1: could chase here. But I would go back. I would
Speaker 1: on this podcast, I would go rewind rewind rewind and
Speaker 1: go back to what Chad said and just do that.
Speaker 1: That's really good. There's there's too much at stake, and
Speaker 1: I think I think that all the things that are
Speaker 1: at stake outweigh maintaining a nice cordial relationship with your
Speaker 1: brother in law. And man to man, if he holds
Speaker 1: that against you, that's his problem. But man de man,
Speaker 1: he should he should value that because you're not You're
Speaker 1: not saying the sky is purple here. You're saying something
Speaker 1: that is That is normal for a friend to say, Hey, buddy,
Speaker 1: you're going on the wrong path. Turn around, come back,
Speaker 1: you know, And I'm not going to say it. You're
Speaker 1: gonna say it to her, right, I'm not going to
Speaker 1: go tell your sister, my sister in law. You're gonna
Speaker 1: say it, and I will. I will stand behind you
Speaker 1: as a friend, but I'm gonna make you walk this direction.
Speaker 1: I think that's great. Yeah, yeah, anything easy, like what's
Speaker 1: my favorite cereal? What is your favorite cereal chain. Well,
Speaker 1: it's evolved over the years, but I was a Lucky
Speaker 1: Charms guy back in the day. Yeah, now I'm a
Speaker 1: little sure. Yeah. Do you have one cheat day or
Speaker 1: out of a year? Maybe Thanksgiving? Uh not really? You
Speaker 1: don't eat Mama's pie on Thanksgiving? Well, so we found
Speaker 1: a really good sugar free pumpkin pie recipe. So and
Speaker 1: it's it's not for everybody, but yeah, another story for
Speaker 1: another time. But going through cancer and having to kind
Speaker 1: of navigate the nutritional components and kind of yeah, how
Speaker 1: to recover from the treatment, I realized it's not worth it.
Speaker 1: So if you had a little bit of sugar right now,
Speaker 1: it would just send you through the roof. It would
Speaker 1: probably be bouncing with crazy probably. Yeah, okay, yeah I
Speaker 1: like that. Man, I love that. Here's the dude that
Speaker 1: answers questions on the podcast and lives it. You know,
Speaker 1: you're gonna tell somebody to do something. Hey, you don't
Speaker 1: even have sugar. So yeah, but it's so yeah, maybe
Speaker 1: the what my favorite cereal? That is too complicated? So
Speaker 1: what is it? Now? I mean, I don't eat cereal?
Speaker 1: You just don't. I don't. I could There is a
Speaker 1: new Cereal Amber just bought it. It's called I think
Speaker 1: it's called Magic Spoon. Hastag not sponsored, but I've been
Speaker 1: eating it lately and it's really good. There's no sugar. Okay,
Speaker 1: it's really good. Maybe they should be a sponsor. Maybe
Speaker 1: it's it's really good. Yeah, let's we've got time for
Speaker 1: one more. Let'sknock out one more here, and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: leave this up to you. Actually, you got your buddy
Speaker 1: Alex here. We're gonna leave this up to Alex. He's
Speaker 1: been off camera and an off microphone, but he is
Speaker 1: working on a future podcast that Chad will be on
Speaker 1: and Granger is going to be my first I'll be
Speaker 1: happy to be a guest on it. So Alex is
Speaker 1: in the corner. It's actually related to you'd brought up
Speaker 1: you'd encourage one of our question askers to start reading
Speaker 1: the Bible. Yeah, and that's what this podcast is gonna be.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be good. It's gonna be I can't wait. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So some days you'll come here and then we'll just
Speaker 1: both drive over to So Alex, I'm gonna leave this
Speaker 1: up to you. Since you've kind of been in the
Speaker 1: corner and no one can see you or hear you,
Speaker 1: but you're gonna shout out what you want. We got
Speaker 1: beliefs slash food for thought. We have advice, random question,
Speaker 1: the trouble with girls. My wife and I are thinking
Speaker 1: about moving podcast question which is always the tricky when
Speaker 1: when they say that I need some advice. Alcoholic veteran
Speaker 1: needs help, faith and friends. There you go. That's enough
Speaker 1: that decision. That's up to you, buddy. The pressure is
Speaker 1: on you. I have one more question. The pressure is
Speaker 1: on you to get the right one. All right. That's
Speaker 1: alcoholic veteran needs help. It says, hey Grange Andrew. Here,
Speaker 1: I'm an army vet twenty eight years old. Here's my question.
Speaker 1: He actually said, here's my queue. Sounds like an army vet.
Speaker 1: Here's my cue, and I hope you can help me
Speaker 1: with because it's been a struggle and now affecting my life.
Speaker 1: I saw I came back home from the army. I
Speaker 1: never saw combat, but a lot of bad things happened
Speaker 1: while in the army, one being a suicide attempt. Now
Speaker 1: that I'm home, I deal with social anxiety, severe up
Speaker 1: and down moods, alcoholism. I try in all caps so
Speaker 1: hard to quit drinking because I feel like it makes
Speaker 1: my issues worse and creates new issues. I've tried AA twice,
Speaker 1: but no luck. I try the love and support of
Speaker 1: my family. But something's missing. If you have any advice,
Speaker 1: all caps, please help. I'm all ears. And that is
Speaker 1: that's a good question, and is a you're not alone.
Speaker 1: You're not alone, Andrew. I got a feeling that there's
Speaker 1: a lot of vets that could hear this and say
Speaker 1: either they have gone through it, or they know somebody,
Speaker 1: or they're in it. Right now, Chad and I are
Speaker 1: going to focus on one piece of your question that
Speaker 1: says something is missing. Thank you for your service to Andrew.
Speaker 1: You're young, and it's guys like you putting forth that
Speaker 1: kind of sacrifice for your life, sacrificing your time for
Speaker 1: that that allows me and Chad to sit here on
Speaker 1: this podcast and exercise our right to free speech because
Speaker 1: that's ensured by guys like you. So thank you for that.
Speaker 1: What do you think, Jed Well, I can speak personally
Speaker 1: from this. My father returned from service in the army
Speaker 1: from Vietnam. He was a helicopter door gunman, and he
Speaker 1: because of the things that he had seen and experienced
Speaker 1: in that came back a very broken man, and his
Speaker 1: coping mechanism was substance abuse, alcohol, drugs on both prescription
Speaker 1: and illegal, and it plagued him and he lost. He
Speaker 1: lost the fight, It sabotaged his marriage to my mom,
Speaker 1: and so he was out of the picture and his
Speaker 1: and the rest of his adult life was in and
Speaker 1: out of rehab AA and it eventually took him. And
Speaker 1: so the stakes are high for you, They're very high.
Speaker 1: And I hope that you're in a place where you're
Speaker 1: willing to consider it. Sounds like you've tried a lot
Speaker 1: of things, you know, AA the love and care of
Speaker 1: your family. But I think we're all in a situation
Speaker 1: where we're wrestling with brokenness. And addiction can come in
Speaker 1: different forms and in ways, and a lot of times
Speaker 1: we try things to deal with brokenness in our life.
Speaker 1: And you've seen things and and so you're coping through
Speaker 1: substance and it's you're finding that it's causing it to
Speaker 1: be worse, right, It's it's anytime we try to respond
Speaker 1: to brokenness from a broken perspective, we're going to create
Speaker 1: more brokenness. It's going to compound the issue. There is
Speaker 1: only one one option that I've ever seen effectively dealing
Speaker 1: with brokenness, and that is when it depends about the
Speaker 1: when you say something like that, right, yeah, only one thing. Okay, Okay,
Speaker 1: everybody's listening. What you got, Chad. It's when we realize
Speaker 1: we don't have an ability to fix the problem ourselves,
Speaker 1: and we realize there is an outside source, and it's
Speaker 1: not a human source. But when we surrender ourselves entirely
Speaker 1: and fully and ask the Lord to come in and
Speaker 1: fix it for us and help us, it's it's the
Speaker 1: only thing that right now, there's this this desire to
Speaker 1: try to fix it, to try to numb it, to
Speaker 1: try to kind of quiet the pain and the memories
Speaker 1: and whatever else, But then they're always still there when
Speaker 1: the effects wear off. It's we had a previous question
Speaker 1: about abuse and why would God allow that to happen,
Speaker 1: And so there's they're plagued with the memories of that
Speaker 1: abuse and that evil. In the same way is whatever
Speaker 1: you're trying to cope with, it's not working. There's only
Speaker 1: one thing that I've seen that helps somebody navigate brokenness
Speaker 1: and come to a place of wholeness and health, and
Speaker 1: that is Jesus Christ himself asking the Lord to come
Speaker 1: and take over, and surrendering and just saying I've tried it.
Speaker 1: I don't have anything else. Will you please show up?
Speaker 1: What's my next step? I'll do whatever it takes. I'll
Speaker 1: try anything that's something, that's it. I don't understand that
Speaker 1: my own father, I don't think that he ever took
Speaker 1: that step. I don't know. I didn't know him because
Speaker 1: he wasn't around in my upbringing, but I know that
Speaker 1: he never was able to get out of the habits
Speaker 1: and the cycle of alcoholism. I want to say this
Speaker 1: that I have seen not very much. I see so
Speaker 1: much love from this podcast, but I have seen every
Speaker 1: once in a while someone says something like stop stop
Speaker 1: pushing your religion on me. And so I just want
Speaker 1: to use this as an example, and Chad could look
Speaker 1: where at the end of the femail says if you
Speaker 1: have any advice all caps, please help. I'm all ears.
Speaker 1: So I want to I want to make it clear
Speaker 1: that I'm not pushing anything on anyone. I'm telling you
Speaker 1: my honest answer from an honest plea from a man
Speaker 1: that's desperate. That's saying, if you have any advice and
Speaker 1: I don't have any other advice. I don't have I've
Speaker 1: not seen anything else that would would even come close
Speaker 1: to helping you. I'm not pushing a religion down your throat.
Speaker 1: I'm as I said earlier, I'm one beggar telling another
Speaker 1: beggar where I found bread, what satisfied my hunger that
Speaker 1: I needed. I don't have any other advice, and so
Speaker 1: I want to set that up and just say Andrew
Speaker 1: is saying, please help, and this is the way I
Speaker 1: know how. If you don't believe me, or if you
Speaker 1: don't want that from me, please know that I'm not
Speaker 1: trying to push it down down your throat or push
Speaker 1: it on any I'm I'm just not a not a
Speaker 1: pushy person. But when I'm asked, I'm going to tell
Speaker 1: you where I have. When I've been broken in my life,
Speaker 1: and when I've been trampled by the world, when I've
Speaker 1: been overrun by fleshly desires and worldly ambitions and crushed
Speaker 1: under grief and loss, there was only one thing. And
Speaker 1: I've tried steps, and I've tried books, and I've tried
Speaker 1: multi step processes, and there was only one thing that
Speaker 1: delivered me peace and once again we go back to
Speaker 1: we're not getting delivered from the pain, We're getting delivered
Speaker 1: through it. And the promise of going through it is
Speaker 1: peace and hope and love in the midst of all that,
Speaker 1: So that you're you're all your memories from the army
Speaker 1: don't just get erased. They don't just you don't just
Speaker 1: snap your fingers and you go, oh, they're all gone. Cool.
Speaker 1: I don't have to think about it anymore. Instead, you
Speaker 1: get into return a peace and hope and love that
Speaker 1: is so great that it overshadows those memories. That's the
Speaker 1: return you get from what Chad is offering here. And
Speaker 1: so what do you do? You say, what's the call
Speaker 1: to action? Like? Great this, great Chad, great grangel? Well
Speaker 1: what do I do you take after this podcast? And
Speaker 1: you find a quiet spot and I'm gonna repeat what
Speaker 1: I said earlier, and you get down on your knees
Speaker 1: and you go, God, I've never talked to you before,
Speaker 1: and I don't want to do this anymore. I can't
Speaker 1: do this anymore. I've tried AA twice. I have a
Speaker 1: love and supporting family and people say that's supposed to help,
Speaker 1: but it's not. I've read books, people bring me these
Speaker 1: books about this stuff and I can't deal with it.
Speaker 1: I can't do it. God, Chad and Granger said that
Speaker 1: you are the only one that could fix it. And
Speaker 1: then you finish that prayer and you open up that
Speaker 1: Bible and you start, let's say somewhere, where would you say,
Speaker 1: start in the New Testament. I'd say either the Gospel
Speaker 1: of John or the Gospel of Mark. I would go
Speaker 1: there too. So you open it up to where it
Speaker 1: says John one or Mark one, and you start right
Speaker 1: there at the top. You could start in Matthew one.
Speaker 1: You could start in any of those gospels and start reading,
Speaker 1: and you will find yourself in those chapters, in those pages.
Speaker 1: You'll say, I'm trying to understand this book, and I'm
Speaker 1: realizing this book understands me, and it's weird and it's
Speaker 1: awesome and it's peace for your soul. And once that starts,
Speaker 1: once that snowball starts right back right back to the spotcast,
Speaker 1: I don't want to hear from you and and know
Speaker 1: that I can't convince you of that that's a supernatural
Speaker 1: thing is And this this podcast has been all about
Speaker 1: it seems like today but we man, I know Chad
Speaker 1: does and I have sympathy for you, and Chad could
Speaker 1: directly relate to you. And no one's saying it's easy
Speaker 1: and and no one is saying there's a there's a
Speaker 1: quick fix. But there is one fix. And I know
Speaker 1: that you believe me because you've sounds like you've tried
Speaker 1: a lot of other things. But there's not a book
Speaker 1: out there, there's not a YouTube class you could take.
Speaker 1: There is one fix, and it's it has to come
Speaker 1: from total brokenness. And we should end the podcast with that. Amen.
Speaker 1: Thank you guys, Thank you Chad lovely brother. See you guys.
Speaker 1: Thanks for joining me on the Granger Smith Podcast. I
Speaker 1: appreciate all of you guys. You could help me out
Speaker 1: by rating these podcasts on iTunes. If you're on YouTube,
Speaker 1: subscribe to this channel, hit that little like button and
Speaker 1: the notification spell so that you never miss anytime I
Speaker 1: upload a video. If you have a question for me
Speaker 1: that you would like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast
Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. Ye