WEBVTT - “HEY I’M TONY HOW YOU DOIN’?” 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:03.480 Hey, folks, it's Lyle get this. I'm coming to over 0:00:03.720 --> 0:00:09.159 forty cities across the United States, the UK, Europe and 0:00:09.320 --> 0:00:15.040 Australia to do this here Therapy Gecko Podcast Live. These 0:00:15.120 --> 0:00:18.079 shows will involve bringing folks from the audience up on 0:00:18.200 --> 0:00:21.840 stage to talk to a gecko about whatever they want, 0:00:22.320 --> 0:00:25.480 just like we do on the podcast. The shows are 0:00:25.520 --> 0:00:29.720 completely unplanned, completely unpredictable, and they will be a lot 0:00:29.760 --> 0:00:32.400 of fun. So if you're a fan of the podcast, 0:00:32.520 --> 0:00:36.440 you should definitely come out. Tickets are available right now 0:00:36.479 --> 0:00:40.520 at therapy geckotour dot com and you should get them 0:00:40.600 --> 0:00:45.960 before they are sold out. That's therapy geckotour dot Com 0:00:45.960 --> 0:00:48.440 will put the link in the episode description as well. 0:00:49.280 --> 0:00:53.280 The live shows are are very fun, they're very geko wee, 0:00:53.720 --> 0:00:55.520 and I hope to see you there. 0:00:55.920 --> 0:00:57.440 All right, let's get into the episode. 0:00:57.520 --> 0:00:59.160 Hello, Hi, how you doing today? 0:01:00.080 --> 0:01:02.760 I'm doing good? How are you? 0:01:02.760 --> 0:01:02.960 You know? 0:01:03.120 --> 0:01:04.200 Not too bad? Not too bad? 0:01:04.720 --> 0:01:05.679 What's your name? Pal? 0:01:06.640 --> 0:01:06.840 Oh? 0:01:06.920 --> 0:01:07.560 Madame is Tony? 0:01:07.640 --> 0:01:10.880 How you doing, Tony? I'm doing good? How you doing? 0:01:11.680 --> 0:01:13.480 Oh? You know, like I said, not too bad, just 0:01:13.560 --> 0:01:15.080 kind of hanging in there. 0:01:15.680 --> 0:01:21.360 Okay, Well, well listen man, uh we can I don't 0:01:21.400 --> 0:01:24.200 know if you know how any of this stuff works, 0:01:24.240 --> 0:01:27.360 but if we can, we what do you want? Is 0:01:27.400 --> 0:01:29.280 there anything in particular you want to talk about today? 0:01:29.400 --> 0:01:29.600 Oh? 0:01:29.720 --> 0:01:33.560 Yeah, you know. Well actually I have seen a few 0:01:33.560 --> 0:01:35.480 of your streams. You really do sound different over the 0:01:35.520 --> 0:01:37.240 phone as opposed to the stream. 0:01:38.360 --> 0:01:38.600 Yeah. 0:01:38.640 --> 0:01:40.560 Well I kind of called me up gone for a second. 0:01:41.640 --> 0:01:44.160 I I well, everyone kind of sounds the same over 0:01:44.160 --> 0:01:47.640 the phone, so I guess that could be why. But well, 0:01:47.720 --> 0:01:49.080 but anyway, man, I mean, what is it that you 0:01:49.080 --> 0:01:50.120 wanted to talk about? 0:01:51.600 --> 0:01:52.000 Uh? 0:01:52.080 --> 0:01:56.600 Yeah, So I've been like, uh, like struggling in my 0:01:56.800 --> 0:02:01.520 like uh love life, you know, said ruality, that kind 0:02:01.520 --> 0:02:02.480 of that kind of DeLeo. 0:02:03.280 --> 0:02:03.560 Sure. 0:02:03.720 --> 0:02:09.160 How so, so I've always been like straight, I've always 0:02:09.200 --> 0:02:15.080 considered myself straight, I suppose. And you know, I was 0:02:15.120 --> 0:02:20.240 on uh what you call it hinge and I don't know, 0:02:20.320 --> 0:02:23.320 I ended up matching with somebody and it turns out 0:02:23.320 --> 0:02:27.640 that they were a trans woman, right m hm. And 0:02:27.840 --> 0:02:30.079 you know we got to talking and I did see 0:02:30.120 --> 0:02:33.560 it on a profile like afterwards, and I was like, oh, 0:02:33.639 --> 0:02:38.200 you know that's cool, that's fine. I don't know what 0:02:38.280 --> 0:02:40.600 it was, but I just kept talking to her. We 0:02:40.680 --> 0:02:45.880 ended up going out beat, and I found it really interesting, 0:02:46.919 --> 0:02:51.880 you know, went on a couple of dates, and I 0:02:51.880 --> 0:02:54.720 don't know, I just, uh, it's different. It is not 0:02:54.919 --> 0:02:58.560 for me, okay, and uh, you know, I don't know 0:02:58.560 --> 0:03:00.880 if it is. I don't want say it's like scary 0:03:01.240 --> 0:03:03.880 or anything like that, but it's different for me. 0:03:04.840 --> 0:03:05.160 Okay. 0:03:07.800 --> 0:03:12.680 So I guess tell me more about the the kind 0:03:12.680 --> 0:03:17.960 of like you know, are you are you afraid of something? 0:03:18.200 --> 0:03:22.360 Are you? Well, how would you describe your struggle with this? 0:03:28.320 --> 0:03:38.120 Uh, there is a little bit of like m I 0:03:38.160 --> 0:03:41.000 guess there's some sort of a stigma to it. You know. 0:03:41.120 --> 0:03:46.280 I grew up, Yeah, I grew up Catholic, kind of 0:03:46.280 --> 0:03:51.360 became Christian over all, like over later there was people 0:03:51.400 --> 0:03:54.800 in my family who were like homophobic, and I kind 0:03:54.800 --> 0:03:57.400 of grew up with that mindset for a while. Sure, 0:03:58.120 --> 0:04:00.560 I'm twenty six right now. When I was in high school, though, 0:04:00.600 --> 0:04:04.120 when I got whatever high school ages, I got to 0:04:04.160 --> 0:04:06.120 a point where I was like because I'd gone to 0:04:06.200 --> 0:04:10.000 a new church and there was like so loving and accepting, 0:04:12.400 --> 0:04:15.080 and I was like, oh, okay, this is great. And 0:04:15.120 --> 0:04:17.919 then like I would see like certain certain things and 0:04:17.960 --> 0:04:21.600 I feel like disgusted almost and then I was like, 0:04:21.640 --> 0:04:26.520 wait a second, hold a pause, this doesn't core Like 0:04:26.560 --> 0:04:30.120 why why would like like it's supposed to be like 0:04:30.160 --> 0:04:33.000 a loving message. Why would I feel this kind of way, 0:04:33.160 --> 0:04:36.800 you know, like gross about it. So I kind of 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:41.880 like try to change my tune over time, which I did. 0:04:42.200 --> 0:04:44.520 It took some time, but like I ended up like 0:04:44.880 --> 0:04:48.279 like I like, I have family, I have friends, you 0:04:48.320 --> 0:04:52.400 know in the LGBT community, So like I was able 0:04:52.440 --> 0:04:55.240 to overcome that and I just kind of like ignored 0:04:55.279 --> 0:05:01.120 everything else over time. I did end up like trying 0:05:01.320 --> 0:05:05.919 to experiment with the man before I didn't really like it. 0:05:05.920 --> 0:05:10.000 It wasn't for me. And then I don't know, I 0:05:10.120 --> 0:05:13.560 just I messed with this person, I went out with them, 0:05:13.720 --> 0:05:17.520 and I don't know, I don't know. I'm just I 0:05:17.600 --> 0:05:20.000 feel like if the answer should be obvious, but like 0:05:20.120 --> 0:05:22.400 I keep like running in circles in my head. 0:05:22.839 --> 0:05:24.800 Oh okay, so tell me when you say you feel 0:05:24.839 --> 0:05:26.440 like the answer should be obvious? 0:05:26.720 --> 0:05:29.719 What what is? What is? What is the answer that 0:05:29.760 --> 0:05:31.160 you feel should be obvious? 0:05:32.480 --> 0:05:36.160 Don't worry about it? Yeah, okay, yeah, it doesn't matter 0:05:36.839 --> 0:05:44.000 right right, Like I know, like like my siblings, my 0:05:44.000 --> 0:05:46.479 my cousins, my like even my best friend. Like I know, 0:05:47.600 --> 0:05:50.560 I know, like if they were the meter, like, everything 0:05:50.600 --> 0:05:56.239 would be like all good and great, you know, yeah, 0:05:56.880 --> 0:06:01.120 my parents, like I feel like my parents, though I 0:06:01.160 --> 0:06:04.640 don't know how well that would go about if I 0:06:04.640 --> 0:06:07.200 ever like introduced her to them. 0:06:07.240 --> 0:06:12.880 Sure m hm. So you kind of know in your 0:06:12.920 --> 0:06:15.440 heart that you know. 0:06:16.480 --> 0:06:21.480 There's there's there's nothing, there's nothing wrong with your being 0:06:21.560 --> 0:06:26.520 attracted to who you're attracted to, but because of how 0:06:27.480 --> 0:06:31.360 you grew up and because of the people around you, 0:06:31.360 --> 0:06:34.400 you're having some some dissonance with it. 0:06:34.480 --> 0:06:35.200 Is that accurate? 0:06:37.960 --> 0:06:48.840 Yeah, I say so, okay, hmmm, So. 0:06:49.440 --> 0:06:52.440 Your what's your relationship like with your parents? 0:06:55.800 --> 0:07:02.320 It's good for the most part. I got loved him, obviously. 0:07:02.680 --> 0:07:06.159 I do find my mom kind of annoying, which is 0:07:06.160 --> 0:07:10.320 a terrible thing to say. My dad, I don't know, 0:07:10.640 --> 0:07:14.400 because I caught him cheating and I didn't talk to 0:07:14.480 --> 0:07:17.680 him about it. I kind of like, uh, it was 0:07:17.760 --> 0:07:19.240 kind of like a scene that I caught on my 0:07:19.320 --> 0:07:21.680 phone and I just kind of brought it to my 0:07:21.760 --> 0:07:25.680 mom right away. And this was like six seven years ago. 0:07:26.200 --> 0:07:29.360 So they have him in together since then. So he 0:07:29.880 --> 0:07:32.680 tries to act friendly with me, but I don't know 0:07:33.640 --> 0:07:36.240 if he still resents me or something for. 0:07:36.120 --> 0:07:42.920 That sure, So man, listen, I think I mean this 0:07:43.000 --> 0:07:46.360 is a this is a tough thing, like kind of 0:07:46.560 --> 0:07:51.240 freeing yourself from the judgment of your parents. But I 0:07:51.280 --> 0:07:54.280 feel like it's so necessary, right because you you should 0:07:54.320 --> 0:07:58.720 be able to feel free to, you know, sexually and 0:07:58.800 --> 0:08:03.440 romantically engage with whoever it is that you want without 0:08:04.400 --> 0:08:06.560 having to run it by your parents at the at 0:08:06.560 --> 0:08:09.680 the age of twenty six, you know. And I don't 0:08:09.680 --> 0:08:11.880 even think I don't even think you have to you 0:08:12.000 --> 0:08:14.360 have to be like, well, fuck you mom, fuck you dad, 0:08:14.760 --> 0:08:16.760 you know, from that kind of place, I think you 0:08:16.800 --> 0:08:19.960 can just be like listen, I love you guys, but 0:08:20.160 --> 0:08:23.080 you can't. You have no say in what I do 0:08:23.160 --> 0:08:25.600 with my own life. 0:08:26.280 --> 0:08:30.600 Well beyond beyond how they would feel from it, because like, yeah, 0:08:30.920 --> 0:08:34.600 you know, honestly, like they haven't like certain partner that's 0:08:34.600 --> 0:08:37.400 had in the past, Like it's like that part is 0:08:37.480 --> 0:08:40.560 kind of like whatever, Like it is a factor, but 0:08:40.720 --> 0:08:46.520 like I'm not like even like sexually right in the bedroom, 0:08:46.960 --> 0:08:51.280 Like that's not like the first time that like, you know, 0:08:51.320 --> 0:08:55.160 we slept together. Like that was very uh, it was 0:08:55.240 --> 0:08:57.760 kind of jarring in a way. I don't know. It 0:08:58.040 --> 0:09:00.000 was almost as if like I kind of turned my 0:09:00.080 --> 0:09:03.760 brain off and just kind of what went with the flow, 0:09:03.840 --> 0:09:09.160 almost like like the person as a person, you know, 0:09:09.320 --> 0:09:13.760 intellectually or even like emotionally like I'm I'm, I'm there, 0:09:14.559 --> 0:09:17.600 but like when it comes to the physical aspect, it like, uh, 0:09:19.559 --> 0:09:23.680 it's different, not what I'm used to. But like I 0:09:23.679 --> 0:09:25.240 I don't know you. 0:09:25.480 --> 0:09:28.120 You you shut your you say you say you shut 0:09:28.120 --> 0:09:29.000 your brain down. 0:09:31.480 --> 0:09:37.439 Yeah, almost like that's you know, the first time I 0:09:37.480 --> 0:09:39.960 saw them, like like we were like naked together, right 0:09:40.160 --> 0:09:42.760 like I'm sorry, I got I know, Like I'm not 0:09:42.800 --> 0:09:46.480 saying anything super crazy here, but like yeah, in that moment, 0:09:46.520 --> 0:09:55.080 it was kind of like, oh, you know, it's you 0:09:55.120 --> 0:09:57.000 know what we're walking with down there, you know, it's 0:09:57.040 --> 0:10:00.560 it's different from what I'm like actually like normally attracted. 0:10:00.880 --> 0:10:04.199 All right, I'm picking up what you're putting down for sure. Okay, 0:10:04.360 --> 0:10:08.880 So I mean look, let me ask you because I mean, 0:10:10.360 --> 0:10:17.920 m hm, so you you are not sexually attracted to 0:10:19.880 --> 0:10:22.360 a certain set of genitals. 0:10:24.000 --> 0:10:25.439 That's fair. That's a fair way to put it. 0:10:25.520 --> 0:10:30.080 Yeah, okay, so let me ask you this then, how 0:10:30.120 --> 0:10:33.400 big of a deal is sex to you in a relationship. 0:10:33.440 --> 0:10:34.120 Is it important? 0:10:36.720 --> 0:10:37.240 It is? 0:10:37.280 --> 0:10:39.679 But it is not like, no, it's not my number 0:10:39.720 --> 0:10:44.400 one goal, all right, It's like it's a thing that 0:10:44.440 --> 0:10:48.920 people do, of course, yeah, And I'm not I'm like, 0:10:49.040 --> 0:10:54.679 that's not something I'm separated from, you know. I'm more 0:10:54.720 --> 0:10:58.680 of like passionate, romantic, kind of like sensual person as 0:10:58.679 --> 0:10:59.280 opposed to. 0:10:59.280 --> 0:11:00.520 Like, oh I can. 0:11:02.280 --> 0:11:04.080 I can tell I hear it in your voice, Tony 0:11:05.240 --> 0:11:11.840 very passionate. Well, well, listen, Matt, I mean this is 0:11:11.920 --> 0:11:16.000 the The thing is is that you can't force yourself 0:11:16.920 --> 0:11:22.760 to be sexually compatible with someone. And I think when 0:11:22.800 --> 0:11:26.760 when you get to this point where everything with this 0:11:26.800 --> 0:11:31.840 person lines up except you, guys aren't sexually compatible, then 0:11:32.400 --> 0:11:36.559 you almost have to weigh how important that is to 0:11:36.679 --> 0:11:39.679 you because you don't want to end up resenting that 0:11:40.760 --> 0:11:42.880 you know, and everyone everyone can make their own decision 0:11:42.880 --> 0:11:44.040 as to how important. 0:11:43.720 --> 0:11:44.280 That is to you. 0:11:45.320 --> 0:11:49.600 Right mhm, I mean that doesn't make sense, that's at all. 0:11:52.920 --> 0:11:53.319 Hmmm. 0:11:54.240 --> 0:11:56.800 Are you what's what's kind of your your the status 0:11:56.880 --> 0:11:57.640 with this person? 0:11:57.679 --> 0:12:01.360 Are you guys dating? Is there a uh? Is there 0:12:01.360 --> 0:12:03.000 a label on it? How long have you been seeing 0:12:03.040 --> 0:12:03.480 each other? 0:12:05.760 --> 0:12:08.280 I've been seeing it like our second date was actually 0:12:08.720 --> 0:12:13.960 New Year's there's not an official label work, like you know, 0:12:14.080 --> 0:12:17.440 like we're dating quote unquote, but we're not like like 0:12:17.440 --> 0:12:21.280 an official couple or anything like that. I mean, I'm 0:12:21.320 --> 0:12:24.120 not talking to anybody else, she says, she's not talking 0:12:24.200 --> 0:12:27.600 anybody else. I do believe us in that regard, but 0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:29.720 that's that's where it is at the moment. 0:12:30.920 --> 0:12:34.400 Apparently you told the call screen or you said that 0:12:34.480 --> 0:12:38.280 you're debating experimenting with her penis. 0:12:40.160 --> 0:12:47.720 Yeah, okay, okay, So, like I mentioned, that's not something 0:12:47.760 --> 0:12:50.199 that like I'm attracted to do. That's not something that 0:12:50.280 --> 0:12:57.679 like I'm familiar with, but I do genuinely have feelings 0:12:57.720 --> 0:13:02.280 for this person. Yeah, and you know, we we have 0:13:02.559 --> 0:13:08.120 slept together and it's mostly like uh, I mean it's 0:13:08.160 --> 0:13:10.600 just the basic you know, by the being got a bomb, 0:13:10.880 --> 0:13:17.240 you know, and uh, I do want to like I 0:13:17.400 --> 0:13:21.440 want to make sure that you know, she has like enjoyment, 0:13:21.520 --> 0:13:24.000 you know, like I actually like legitimately care that, like 0:13:25.280 --> 0:13:28.880 you know whatever. Yeah, So, like. 0:13:29.400 --> 0:13:36.000 I I was thinking to myself, like I would I 0:13:36.040 --> 0:13:39.000 would be I guess willing to like you know, do 0:13:39.120 --> 0:13:41.120 something I wouldn't actually normally. 0:13:41.720 --> 0:13:44.840 Do in general, for this person. 0:13:45.880 --> 0:13:51.400 Okay, how so lam asks have you experience? 0:13:51.440 --> 0:13:51.680 Have you? 0:13:52.960 --> 0:13:57.200 Uh so you're open to experimenting to. 0:13:56.760 --> 0:14:01.760 To uh you know sexual acts involve the penis. 0:14:02.840 --> 0:14:05.679 You and you have. How how much have you experimented 0:14:06.040 --> 0:14:06.920 already so far? 0:14:08.800 --> 0:14:09.000 Oh? 0:14:09.080 --> 0:14:09.280 Man? 0:14:09.360 --> 0:14:12.760 I mean if there's no filter here, I mean I 0:14:12.800 --> 0:14:16.679 was I was hanging out with like actually somebody who 0:14:17.200 --> 0:14:21.520 I loosely work with. It was a drunk moment. We 0:14:21.520 --> 0:14:23.840 were all we were in a bunch of people went out, 0:14:23.880 --> 0:14:27.360 we were partying. We had a hotel room. Uh, nobody 0:14:27.400 --> 0:14:29.480 brought in any woman, right, like you know, as all 0:14:29.560 --> 0:14:32.120 dudes we went out like the goal was, you know, 0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:36.200 go get some women. Nobody got women? Yeah. Uh. Me 0:14:36.200 --> 0:14:40.600 and this dude were awake. Uh you know there was 0:14:40.680 --> 0:14:44.640 kissing involves. He was like, you know, touching me and everything, 0:14:44.640 --> 0:14:49.000 and I I couldn't bring myself to do more than that. 0:14:50.040 --> 0:14:56.640 But like I definitely didn't like really enjoy that truthfully. Okay, 0:14:58.440 --> 0:14:59.200 that's really it? 0:15:00.360 --> 0:15:03.480 Well, Tony, Look, I think I think it is. 0:15:05.040 --> 0:15:07.400 It's I don't know, this is such a this is 0:15:07.440 --> 0:15:11.160 a tough issue, right because I mean, look, the the 0:15:11.200 --> 0:15:14.320 whole like you know, forget about the the the kind 0:15:14.320 --> 0:15:17.040 of underlying aspects of this, like just the idea of 0:15:17.200 --> 0:15:21.680 being romantically and intellectually attracted to somebody but not being 0:15:21.720 --> 0:15:23.600 sexually compatible with them is a. 0:15:23.520 --> 0:15:30.040 Tough one, right, And I don't know. Again, I would 0:15:30.040 --> 0:15:31.400 consider how important that is to you. 0:15:31.520 --> 0:15:34.680 And also, like you said, you want her to feel 0:15:35.880 --> 0:15:37.200 pleasure as well. 0:15:37.240 --> 0:15:37.880 And you should. 0:15:37.880 --> 0:15:42.680 You should consider the idea that part of her sexual 0:15:42.760 --> 0:15:47.320 pleasure would probably involve a partner who. 0:15:47.160 --> 0:15:49.760 Is very sexually excited about them. 0:15:50.400 --> 0:15:54.120 And if that's not you, and that yeah, and you 0:15:54.160 --> 0:15:56.920 and you know that you can't force that to be you, 0:15:58.080 --> 0:16:04.800 then you almost do her a disservice by continuing to 0:16:04.800 --> 0:16:09.000 to kind of will yourself through sleeping with her, if 0:16:09.000 --> 0:16:09.720 that makes sense. 0:16:11.920 --> 0:16:13.360 No, yeah, I see what you're saying. 0:16:15.320 --> 0:16:15.800 Uh. 0:16:15.840 --> 0:16:17.960 But to all the other points that you were talking about, 0:16:18.000 --> 0:16:21.240 I I do hope that you're able to Um, I'm 0:16:21.720 --> 0:16:25.080 I'm glad that you're you're you're kind of abandoning all 0:16:25.120 --> 0:16:29.440 the programming that you grew up with that is like 0:16:30.400 --> 0:16:34.080 acting as a barrier between you and these new experiences. 0:16:34.120 --> 0:16:35.640 That sounded like it was it might have been a 0:16:35.680 --> 0:16:36.320 tough thing to do. 0:16:38.360 --> 0:16:43.560 Oh absolutely, m hm, Tony, What do you do. 0:16:43.560 --> 0:16:45.720 For a living. I'm very curious about you as a person. 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:50.640 Uh, I'm in the military. I'm about to get out. 0:16:50.720 --> 0:16:53.240 Actually, oh yeah, what are you gonna do when you're. 0:16:57.360 --> 0:16:59.800 I don't know, if pick out the family business, probably 0:17:00.520 --> 0:17:02.280 I want to go back. I went to like, this 0:17:02.320 --> 0:17:06.080 is gonna sound so stupid. I went to school at first. 0:17:06.320 --> 0:17:08.800 I went to college for like three years. Joined the 0:17:08.800 --> 0:17:10.760 military because I was just I was not in a 0:17:10.760 --> 0:17:17.240 good place in life. I was studying criminal justice, a 0:17:17.240 --> 0:17:20.440 little bit of psychology, a little bit of corolinary arts. 0:17:20.480 --> 0:17:28.119 You know, I love cooking. Family has a restaurant, and 0:17:28.200 --> 0:17:31.200 I could see myself picking it up, you know, taking 0:17:31.240 --> 0:17:34.640 over from my dad, you know, running with it. I mean, 0:17:34.720 --> 0:17:38.159 to be honest, I feel like that's the too easy option. 0:17:38.320 --> 0:17:41.679 You know, it's just, oh yeah, take up some established 0:17:41.760 --> 0:17:46.159 business and just run with it, which I believe I 0:17:46.200 --> 0:17:50.959 will enjoy it. But you know, it's not like there 0:17:51.080 --> 0:17:54.320 there there is a desire to do something like on 0:17:54.400 --> 0:17:57.360 my own as opposed to just you know, picking up 0:17:58.119 --> 0:17:59.719 something already established. 0:18:00.400 --> 0:18:05.359 What do you want to do on your own, Tony. 0:18:06.480 --> 0:18:09.919 That's a very good question. That's a very good question. 0:18:12.040 --> 0:18:13.800 I mean, I do I do like cooking. You know, 0:18:13.840 --> 0:18:15.600 if if I were to do it on my own. 0:18:15.440 --> 0:18:17.520 I was gonna say, I was really hoping you were 0:18:17.520 --> 0:18:20.120 gonna want to open a restaurant called Tony's. 0:18:21.960 --> 0:18:24.080 Hey, you know, fat Tonys or something like that. 0:18:24.080 --> 0:18:27.760 I'd be kind of funny if any inkling of a 0:18:27.840 --> 0:18:30.920 desire to open up a restaurant called Tony's. 0:18:30.960 --> 0:18:33.000 I want to be the guy that convinces you to 0:18:33.000 --> 0:18:33.320 do it. 0:18:36.720 --> 0:18:39.720 I mean, you know, I I cooking a pizza. You 0:18:39.800 --> 0:18:40.960 know what I'm saying. 0:18:40.960 --> 0:18:42.679 The pizza. You definitely cooking the pizza. 0:18:43.520 --> 0:18:43.639 Uh. 0:18:43.680 --> 0:18:47.560 You said you like, what do you cook? Tony? 0:18:48.560 --> 0:18:52.560 I do mostly cook pastas. I make a lot of sauces. 0:18:53.640 --> 0:18:57.960 I've dabbled in like Italian Mexican. I'm not you know, 0:18:58.359 --> 0:19:04.159 Italian Mexican fusion. I feel like it works really well, 0:19:06.000 --> 0:19:08.000 to be honest, I mean, you know. 0:19:08.680 --> 0:19:11.359 What happens in Mexican What what? 0:19:11.359 --> 0:19:11.600 What? 0:19:11.600 --> 0:19:16.680 What is an Italian Mexican fusion dish? 0:19:16.800 --> 0:19:21.239 You can take any sauce right, any pasta dish. You know, 0:19:21.320 --> 0:19:24.040 you just add a couple of things in there, you know. 0:19:25.119 --> 0:19:29.840 I mean, if you want to be the most basic halopenios, right, 0:19:31.560 --> 0:19:38.720 I've made this weird uh lasagna with like well there's more. 0:19:39.480 --> 0:19:43.200 It's less Mexican, but like with like plantains, right as 0:19:43.200 --> 0:19:47.399 opposed to like pasta noodles or whatever, the lasagna noodle, 0:19:47.440 --> 0:19:50.920 whatever it's called. That ship is a banger. You could 0:19:51.040 --> 0:19:55.000 mix a regueo with the lonstro vice versa. You know, 0:19:55.160 --> 0:19:57.360 just throw in a little bit of those ingredients in there, 0:19:57.520 --> 0:20:01.119 you know, substitute for toiso or or whatever, and it 0:20:01.280 --> 0:20:03.080 just all kind of brings itself together. 0:20:04.119 --> 0:20:11.159 All right, hear me out on this chicken parmesan tacos. 0:20:11.400 --> 0:20:12.600 I've made those. 0:20:13.680 --> 0:20:16.760 You have, I've made those? 0:20:17.720 --> 0:20:18.800 What are they like? 0:20:21.680 --> 0:20:25.679 You know, I feel like the idea of it worked 0:20:25.920 --> 0:20:28.480 a little bit better than the I mean maybe maybe 0:20:28.520 --> 0:20:31.720 I got I gotta like try it again. You know, 0:20:32.840 --> 0:20:35.119 I feel like I can make it work. You know, 0:20:35.359 --> 0:20:39.520 when people get chicken tomasan, you know, it's not like 0:20:39.880 --> 0:20:42.120 it's a piece of chicken that you cut up yourself. 0:20:42.119 --> 0:20:43.960 It's not already pretty cut, it's not shredded. 0:20:44.520 --> 0:20:44.720 You know. 0:20:44.800 --> 0:20:50.040 You you the name of it, the idea of it, 0:20:50.040 --> 0:20:54.280 it's like a dream. You know, there's a way to 0:20:54.359 --> 0:20:58.480 make it work. Being in you know, I've been four 0:20:58.560 --> 0:21:01.840 years in the military. I you know, I don't have 0:21:01.880 --> 0:21:04.360 a kitchen right now, so like it's mostly like I'm 0:21:04.359 --> 0:21:08.240 fucking around, you know, cooking or like if there's a 0:21:08.320 --> 0:21:12.160 barbecue something going on. But once I go home, that's 0:21:12.160 --> 0:21:14.720 when I'm going to be able to actually cook and 0:21:14.840 --> 0:21:17.920 experiment and do things again. I signed my life away 0:21:17.960 --> 0:21:21.240 for a full years. Anybody out there, just real quick, 0:21:21.240 --> 0:21:23.200 if you're thinking about doing the military, don't do it. 0:21:23.640 --> 0:21:26.520 And if you do do it, don't join don't join 0:21:26.560 --> 0:21:28.240 the Navy for the Marine Corps. 0:21:28.720 --> 0:21:29.600 That's a funny, kase. 0:21:30.119 --> 0:21:31.200 I've talked. 0:21:31.240 --> 0:21:32.760 I've said this a bunch of times on the podcast, 0:21:32.760 --> 0:21:34.800 but I've talked to people who've joined the military and 0:21:34.840 --> 0:21:38.600 it's been like the best decision they ever made. And 0:21:38.640 --> 0:21:40.560 then I talked to people where it's the opposite. You know, 0:21:40.600 --> 0:21:49.320 they hated it. One last thing. Okay, meat sauce, nachos. 0:21:50.480 --> 0:21:54.359 Easiest thing in the world. It's a anger out of 0:21:54.359 --> 0:21:55.880 ten flas stars. 0:21:56.800 --> 0:21:59.600 Tony, I really, Tony. I want to see the universe 0:21:59.800 --> 0:22:02.160 for you so badly. Where you open up your where 0:22:02.200 --> 0:22:06.080 you just you defy your parents' wishes. 0:22:06.240 --> 0:22:07.280 You you you. 0:22:07.119 --> 0:22:11.720 Open your own Mexican Italian fusion restaurant, you date whoever 0:22:11.800 --> 0:22:17.160 you want. I such a beautiful, beautiful life awaits you. 0:22:17.320 --> 0:22:19.000 Should you make your own decisions. 0:22:19.160 --> 0:22:20.119 I do see it. 0:22:21.560 --> 0:22:22.080 Check it out. 0:22:22.280 --> 0:22:28.720 Guido Beans, what is it? Guido bes Gueto bees? 0:22:29.040 --> 0:22:34.920 Don't Guido beans like Guido is like an Italian Guido 0:22:35.160 --> 0:22:39.000 Wiedo is an Italian name or whatever? The and then 0:22:39.080 --> 0:22:40.919 beings because beaners, you know what I mean? You know 0:22:40.920 --> 0:22:41.879 what I mean? 0:22:42.800 --> 0:22:47.600 I don't know absolutely. 0:22:47.720 --> 0:22:49.640 I am all right. 0:22:49.640 --> 0:22:51.320 I'll take your word for. 0:22:51.359 --> 0:22:56.720 It, Tony, Is there anything else you want to say 0:22:56.760 --> 0:22:58.439 to the people of the computer before we go? 0:23:01.760 --> 0:23:04.520 I'man just to reiterate, if you're going to join the military, 0:23:04.560 --> 0:23:06.399 the Navy and the Marine Corps don't do it. 0:23:09.400 --> 0:23:09.879 Good to know. 0:23:09.960 --> 0:23:13.000 I did watch after this they're going to make me 0:23:13.080 --> 0:23:15.720 read a fucking ad for the US military or something 0:23:15.760 --> 0:23:15.960 like that. 0:23:16.040 --> 0:23:20.280 I swear to God, I wouldn't doubt it. 0:23:21.000 --> 0:23:25.040 All right, take care, Tony, Hey, you as well appreciate it. 0:23:25.760 --> 0:23:26.040 All right. 0:23:26.040 --> 0:23:33.159 I'm trying to think of one more veal burrito. Guido Beans, 0:23:33.200 --> 0:23:36.200 I'm there, Hi there. 0:23:37.080 --> 0:23:38.640 Hello, Hi? 0:23:38.720 --> 0:23:39.320 Who is this? 0:23:39.640 --> 0:23:40.880 My name is Daisy Joe. 0:23:42.280 --> 0:23:43.720 Hi, Daisy Joe. How are you? 0:23:46.160 --> 0:23:46.840 Is this wild? 0:23:47.800 --> 0:23:48.080 Yep? 0:23:50.359 --> 0:23:52.320 Why do you sound so? 0:23:52.760 --> 0:23:54.960 I don't know how to answer that question. Really, I don't. 0:23:55.040 --> 0:23:56.879 If I had an answer for you, I would tell you. 0:23:56.880 --> 0:23:57.919 But I don't have an answer. 0:24:00.520 --> 0:24:08.359 I'm so sorry. I just said, you're like my mom. 0:24:05.680 --> 0:24:08.840 What's your your Daisy Joe, what's going on, Daisy Joe? 0:24:09.000 --> 0:24:09.720 How's life? 0:24:12.840 --> 0:24:13.199 Life? 0:24:14.160 --> 0:24:15.000 It exists? 0:24:15.440 --> 0:24:15.880 We're here. 0:24:16.000 --> 0:24:16.199 You know. 0:24:17.040 --> 0:24:18.239 I have a story to tell you. 0:24:19.040 --> 0:24:24.040 Okay, you have a story to tell me. What's the story? 0:24:24.119 --> 0:24:29.240 So, but I was like like eighteen or nineteen, I 0:24:29.280 --> 0:24:31.000 was dropping out of college and that was like a 0:24:31.160 --> 0:24:35.800 huge deal with like my family because they like forced 0:24:35.840 --> 0:24:38.760 me to like go live with this southern family. So 0:24:38.800 --> 0:24:40.840 I was like making everybody mad in the world. So 0:24:40.920 --> 0:24:43.480 I think this is like a really big deal, like 0:24:43.600 --> 0:24:45.639 crazy big thing in my life. It's really not. 0:24:46.680 --> 0:24:49.119 Okay, So you were you were your parents were kind 0:24:49.119 --> 0:24:50.160 of forcing you to drop out. 0:24:50.200 --> 0:24:51.400 It wasn't really your decision. 0:24:53.680 --> 0:24:56.320 No, they forced me to go to school. I me 0:24:56.560 --> 0:25:00.720 dropping out was like a whoa coat thing? 0:25:00.800 --> 0:25:03.080 You know, what is a woe kind of thing? 0:25:05.760 --> 0:25:09.480 Yeah, it was pretty low like a right, Okay, So 0:25:09.560 --> 0:25:12.000 I feel like I'm liking the hardest part of my life. Right. 0:25:12.600 --> 0:25:16.040 It's not. But I think that because I'm eighteen and 0:25:17.440 --> 0:25:21.639 I'm driving on like the longest highway like in the world, right, 0:25:22.400 --> 0:25:27.480 and this man jumps in front of my car and 0:25:27.560 --> 0:25:30.960 I thought it was a deer, and I'm like, what 0:25:31.119 --> 0:25:35.679 the fuck? And it's like three am. So I stopped 0:25:35.680 --> 0:25:39.080 and I turn around, and I first I start tussing 0:25:39.160 --> 0:25:42.199 him out, and then I realized he's crying and he 0:25:42.280 --> 0:25:46.920 has mud up to his chest. He only has shorts on, 0:25:47.000 --> 0:25:51.040 like cargo shorts on with bales wine. He's like pulling 0:25:51.040 --> 0:25:55.560 his pants up and he starts crying about how his 0:25:55.600 --> 0:26:01.439 wife left him because he's addicted to porn and he 0:26:01.600 --> 0:26:05.159 cheated on his wife with porns. And I'm like super 0:26:05.240 --> 0:26:07.439 freaked out. So I like throw him some water and 0:26:07.480 --> 0:26:10.600 some chips, and he wants me to give him a ride, 0:26:10.600 --> 0:26:12.919 but I'm like no, because I'm an eighteen year old 0:26:13.000 --> 0:26:16.360 girl and you're an old naked man. So I let 0:26:16.400 --> 0:26:19.119 him right on top of the car. 0:26:20.040 --> 0:26:23.720 Okay, hold on, I'm sorry. Okay, I give one saying 0:26:24.320 --> 0:26:29.120 you thought you hit a deer and it turned out 0:26:29.119 --> 0:26:35.120 you hit a naked man, and so yet hit him. 0:26:35.200 --> 0:26:36.480 I came really really close. 0:26:37.960 --> 0:26:40.040 Okay, so you thought you hit him, so you pulled 0:26:40.040 --> 0:26:44.560 over to go talk to him. 0:26:44.720 --> 0:26:46.879 Yeah, I was gonna cuts him out, but then I 0:26:46.920 --> 0:26:51.120 start filing bad form. 0:26:49.640 --> 0:26:53.120 Okay, and you let him ride so so so you 0:26:53.160 --> 0:26:57.280 almost hit this guy, and then you stopped and went 0:26:57.280 --> 0:26:59.399 to get out of your car just to yell at 0:26:59.400 --> 0:27:01.080 this guy for being in the middle of the street. 0:27:01.800 --> 0:27:03.400 And then you see that he's fully like. 0:27:05.480 --> 0:27:09.160 All right, now, yeah, shorts on, they're just hanging off 0:27:09.160 --> 0:27:11.359 his body. He's got nothing, but like. 0:27:11.520 --> 0:27:13.920 All right, all right, all right, So then you let 0:27:14.000 --> 0:27:16.919 him ride on the top of your car. 0:27:18.280 --> 0:27:22.440 Yeah, Because I haven't watched enough true crime ship yet, 0:27:22.520 --> 0:27:30.840 I guess. Okay, it doesn't just wild doesn't stop there. 0:27:31.680 --> 0:27:33.640 I sang hymnals to him too. 0:27:37.160 --> 0:27:42.639 What is the climax of this story? How does this end? 0:27:42.800 --> 0:27:46.080 So I dropped him off at this gas station in 0:27:46.119 --> 0:27:49.439 the middle of nowhere, Arkansas, and I'm like, you need 0:27:49.480 --> 0:27:55.159 to stay here because somebody in the morning, like you 0:27:55.200 --> 0:27:58.960 can go to like a police station. Maybe you could, 0:27:59.000 --> 0:28:05.960 you know, find some humanitarian resources, a shelter, your wife. 0:28:06.400 --> 0:28:07.000 I don't know. 0:28:08.480 --> 0:28:11.959 So I'm driving off and there's a semi coming and 0:28:12.000 --> 0:28:14.959 as I'm driving away, he's like crying on the steps 0:28:15.480 --> 0:28:17.800 and then I see him stand up as the semis 0:28:17.800 --> 0:28:20.479 coming and he runs out in front of it, and 0:28:20.600 --> 0:28:23.600 like I didn't actually see him go splat, but I 0:28:23.640 --> 0:28:27.600 heard the like agonizing scream, and then I saw the 0:28:27.640 --> 0:28:31.400 semi coming, and then I floored it. I was going 0:28:31.400 --> 0:28:34.359 like one hundred and twenty because I didn't want to 0:28:34.400 --> 0:28:36.840 see it happen. I was just like, you know, I 0:28:36.840 --> 0:28:37.879 know what too plus two is. 0:28:37.920 --> 0:28:43.200 You know, dude, what wait, okay, that's all right. 0:28:43.920 --> 0:28:48.960 So so you dropped this guy off at a gas station. 0:28:49.400 --> 0:28:54.000 He's a complete stranger, he's crying, he's basically naked, and 0:28:54.040 --> 0:28:56.200 then you drop him off and you're like, look, man, 0:28:56.360 --> 0:29:01.080 I you know, I I don't know you. I can't 0:29:01.280 --> 0:29:04.360 really help you that further, but like stay here and 0:29:04.560 --> 0:29:07.200 you know, wait until the morning you can find someone 0:29:07.200 --> 0:29:07.640 to help you. 0:29:08.360 --> 0:29:11.200 And then you drive away. And then you as. 0:29:11.040 --> 0:29:13.600 You're driving away, you see him run and jump in 0:29:13.600 --> 0:29:15.160 front of a semi truck and get hit. 0:29:19.160 --> 0:29:25.760 Yeah. Well, I looked at that very last second it 0:29:25.760 --> 0:29:28.040 could have been like super traumatizing, but it wasn't. I 0:29:28.040 --> 0:29:29.720 was looking at the road and I was flooring it. 0:29:29.840 --> 0:29:34.600 So okay, it was too disgusting, right. 0:29:34.640 --> 0:29:41.960 Thing, How what do you what do you make of 0:29:42.000 --> 0:29:47.080 this situation? Here, How did this affect you in any 0:29:47.120 --> 0:29:50.680 way or what? What do you what's your observation here? 0:29:51.160 --> 0:29:54.240 I do too dam much with people. I do too 0:29:54.320 --> 0:29:56.640 damn much. That's how I get all much rumble. I 0:29:56.720 --> 0:30:00.080 just do too damn much for people that Okay, I 0:30:00.120 --> 0:30:02.360 don't even I don't know I need to be doing that, 0:30:02.440 --> 0:30:02.640 you know? 0:30:03.800 --> 0:30:04.120 Okay? 0:30:04.160 --> 0:30:05.800 What do you him on the size of round? 0:30:06.520 --> 0:30:06.840 Sure? 0:30:07.000 --> 0:30:07.200 Yeah? 0:30:07.240 --> 0:30:08.760 Yeah? Sure? What do you? 0:30:08.800 --> 0:30:11.720 Why do you feel like you what makes you feel 0:30:11.720 --> 0:30:13.160 like you do too much for people? 0:30:15.320 --> 0:30:18.480 Because that could have gone like so bad. He could 0:30:18.520 --> 0:30:22.320 have killed me, bro, he could have actually murdered me 0:30:23.240 --> 0:30:26.640 mm hmm, but he didn't. He did like he did, 0:30:26.760 --> 0:30:31.040 he murdered himself. He did the best case scenario almost. 0:30:31.040 --> 0:30:34.120 I don't know if it's the best case scenario, but 0:30:34.160 --> 0:30:35.320 it is what happened. 0:30:37.640 --> 0:30:40.160 If somebody was gonna die, the best case scenario. 0:30:41.120 --> 0:30:50.160 Okay, So how old are you now? 0:30:54.520 --> 0:30:54.800 Huh? 0:30:55.480 --> 0:31:01.720 I said? How old? Yeah? All right? 0:31:01.800 --> 0:31:09.120 So this happened four years ago? Yeah, all right, and 0:31:10.400 --> 0:31:12.800 you felt as though the lesson you learned from it 0:31:13.040 --> 0:31:19.360 was that you do too damn much for people. That's right, 0:31:20.320 --> 0:31:25.880 and contemporarily, yes, put on yours before you help others, 0:31:25.920 --> 0:31:28.280 and you know, there's. 0:31:27.320 --> 0:31:28.520 A lot in that philosophy. 0:31:30.920 --> 0:31:34.520 So today, you know, this having happened four years ago, 0:31:35.840 --> 0:31:38.000 do you still feel as though you do too much 0:31:38.080 --> 0:31:38.560 for people? 0:31:40.920 --> 0:31:46.040 No? Okay, I think I stopped doing that. Okay, I 0:31:46.040 --> 0:31:48.360 think I do other stupid shit now, but I don't 0:31:48.360 --> 0:31:48.600 do that. 0:31:49.840 --> 0:31:54.120 Okay. What made you want to stop doing too much 0:31:54.160 --> 0:31:54.640 for people? 0:31:57.960 --> 0:32:05.400 Because instead of like, like it's just it's honestly, I 0:32:05.440 --> 0:32:07.400 don't know why, maybe kind of think like it's really 0:32:07.440 --> 0:32:10.640 not that rewarding because like I was the last person 0:32:10.920 --> 0:32:13.479 that was ever kind to this man, you know, like 0:32:13.520 --> 0:32:16.240 I sang to him, I gave him a ride, I 0:32:16.240 --> 0:32:20.080 gave him potato chips and waters, and then none of 0:32:20.160 --> 0:32:23.120 that mattered, you know, he still jumped in front of 0:32:23.200 --> 0:32:26.560 a fucking truck. Like, it doesn't feel that good to 0:32:26.720 --> 0:32:28.680 just be doing shit for people when you don't have 0:32:28.720 --> 0:32:29.960 your own ship figured it out, you know. 0:32:31.200 --> 0:32:39.400 Hmmm, It's an interesting way to think about it. So yeah, okay, 0:32:39.400 --> 0:32:41.280 So you were telling me that at that time, you 0:32:41.760 --> 0:32:46.440 were having to drop out of school even though you 0:32:46.480 --> 0:32:49.280 wanted to go to school, and you didn't feel as 0:32:49.320 --> 0:32:51.640 though you had your your life together. 0:32:53.200 --> 0:32:54.160 Correct. 0:32:55.920 --> 0:32:58.240 Yeah, Oh yeah, straight, out of high school. 0:32:58.320 --> 0:33:02.840 So all right, and so you helped out this guy 0:33:03.240 --> 0:33:08.920 by letting him ride on top of your car and 0:33:09.320 --> 0:33:12.560 singing him lullabies and getting him to a place where 0:33:12.560 --> 0:33:17.080 he could at least get some some you know, somewhere 0:33:17.120 --> 0:33:18.800 somewhere better than the middle of the street. 0:33:21.560 --> 0:33:24.320 Well yeah, and it's like an southern Arkansas too, so 0:33:24.400 --> 0:33:25.520 it was like field. 0:33:26.440 --> 0:33:26.760 Okay. 0:33:26.800 --> 0:33:34.120 So so, so stick with you for a second. And 0:33:35.920 --> 0:33:39.040 you now feel as though you need to work on 0:33:39.120 --> 0:33:46.680 figuring out your own life before you help other people. Yeah, okay, 0:33:49.240 --> 0:33:55.040 So do you feel like you have yourself? And look, 0:33:55.080 --> 0:33:57.360 nobody ever has themselves fully together? But do you feel 0:33:57.360 --> 0:33:59.320 as though you're personally at a better place now than 0:33:59.360 --> 0:33:59.800 you were then? 0:34:02.640 --> 0:34:05.400 Oh my god? Yeah, oh my god. 0:34:05.480 --> 0:34:14.200 Yeah yeah okay, And do you feel as though you 0:34:14.280 --> 0:34:17.640 have any desire to help people, like, let's say, let's 0:34:17.640 --> 0:34:19.919 say that's something like that happened to you, now, would 0:34:19.960 --> 0:34:21.359 you not have helped that guy? 0:34:22.520 --> 0:34:23.520 If that happened now. 0:34:26.640 --> 0:34:29.799 I probably honestly would have called the police station, And 0:34:29.840 --> 0:34:31.960 that's what would have been me helping, or like something 0:34:32.040 --> 0:34:34.600 like that, you know, sure, or if there's like a 0:34:34.640 --> 0:34:37.960 shelter nearby or something some kind of something not. 0:34:38.040 --> 0:34:50.520 Me, Okay, you know, I'm like, I mean, I get it. 0:34:50.560 --> 0:34:53.520 I understand. You know. 0:34:53.760 --> 0:34:56.080 Look, you're an eighteen year old girl and this guy's, 0:34:56.120 --> 0:35:00.279 you know, a random guy on the side of the road. 0:35:00.320 --> 0:35:04.200 I understand your your apprehensions in. 0:35:04.239 --> 0:35:12.160 This, Like I pretend that I don't. Yeah, I don't know. 0:35:12.239 --> 0:35:17.799 I don't know to what degree you're obligated to to 0:35:17.880 --> 0:35:20.200 help other people, especially if you feel as though you 0:35:20.280 --> 0:35:25.360 might be at risk. Yeah, you know, I'll do the 0:35:25.360 --> 0:35:29.319 best you can, right, How do you feel like you're 0:35:29.360 --> 0:35:30.600 gonna approach. 0:35:30.200 --> 0:35:31.680 The world's moving forward? 0:35:32.280 --> 0:35:35.800 Do you do you feel a desire to help people 0:35:35.880 --> 0:35:38.520 or do you sort of feel like it's better for 0:35:38.600 --> 0:35:40.400 you to just completely focus on yourself. 0:35:44.239 --> 0:35:46.400 I feel like there's ways you can help people without 0:35:46.520 --> 0:35:49.799 like getting balls deep in it, you know. 0:35:50.560 --> 0:35:52.279 Sure, Like. 0:36:00.200 --> 0:36:01.600 I don't know, Like I don't pick up I used 0:36:01.600 --> 0:36:05.200 to pick up people, like like even before that, I 0:36:05.320 --> 0:36:09.080 like got somebody with me like a knife or something. 0:36:09.440 --> 0:36:10.880 I like pick people up on the side of the 0:36:10.920 --> 0:36:14.160 road all the time, like whatever. Like that's so which 0:36:14.440 --> 0:36:18.320 that's like such an obvious it's like a landed ass example. 0:36:18.440 --> 0:36:18.759 But like. 0:36:20.719 --> 0:36:25.480 I don't know, like I would I do like helping 0:36:25.520 --> 0:36:28.719 people like I I wanna after the season of my 0:36:28.840 --> 0:36:32.319 job and I'm gonna go to nursing school. That's a good, 0:36:32.400 --> 0:36:33.160 healthy way. 0:36:32.960 --> 0:36:36.839 To help people, I think. I think. 0:36:36.880 --> 0:36:39.279 So that's a that's a bit more of a controlled 0:36:39.360 --> 0:36:41.719 environment for helping people than the side of the road 0:36:41.760 --> 0:36:42.520 in Arkansas. 0:36:44.960 --> 0:36:47.040 True, you are correct. 0:36:47.880 --> 0:36:48.960 Mm hmmm mm hmm. 0:36:51.560 --> 0:36:53.440 Well, I'm glad that you have a sort of future 0:36:53.480 --> 0:36:57.840 plan for you to, uh, you know, help other people 0:36:57.880 --> 0:36:59.440 in a more control of the way. You bring up 0:36:59.440 --> 0:37:04.200 an interesting, an interesting kind of moral delima that I'll 0:37:04.239 --> 0:37:07.080 have to think about. Uh, Daisy, there's anything else you 0:37:07.080 --> 0:37:08.439 want to say to the people of the computer before 0:37:08.480 --> 0:37:08.680 we go. 0:37:13.200 --> 0:37:16.919 Don't pick up naked ass dudes on the side road 0:37:18.160 --> 0:37:21.160 and put your own mask on before you try to 0:37:21.200 --> 0:37:24.120 help other people, or you'll die or something. Or you 0:37:24.200 --> 0:37:26.600 might not die, you might see somebody else die, and 0:37:26.640 --> 0:37:27.160 that's weird. 0:37:29.640 --> 0:37:31.920 Thanks for calling, Daisy Joe. 0:37:33.440 --> 0:37:35.120 You're welcome anytime. 0:37:35.920 --> 0:37:36.040 Hi. 0:37:36.120 --> 0:37:44.440 Bye. I just have to say the call screener wrote 0:37:44.480 --> 0:37:49.880 down for her. H Daisy Joe has a story about 0:37:49.960 --> 0:37:54.239 seeing a guy commit suicide. Says it's funny and light. 0:37:57.800 --> 0:38:00.400 I guess that was I don't know. 0:38:00.600 --> 0:38:06.080 I don't know. Yeah, okay, yeah, I don't know. I like, 0:38:06.120 --> 0:38:06.480 I get it. 0:38:06.480 --> 0:38:08.080 I'm not gonna say I don't get it. I'm not 0:38:08.080 --> 0:38:12.799 gonna say I don't get it. There there is you. 0:38:13.040 --> 0:38:16.640 When you pick up a naked man from the street, 0:38:17.880 --> 0:38:20.799 you're running, you're running into you're you're not you're there's 0:38:20.840 --> 0:38:24.160 some risk there. Undeniably, you can't deny that risk. But 0:38:24.239 --> 0:38:26.640 is it worth the risk to help another person? 0:38:28.800 --> 0:38:29.920 I don't know. 0:38:30.280 --> 0:38:36.760 I don't have an opinion on that, but we'll we'll, 0:38:36.800 --> 0:38:39.480 we'll see what happens to me next time I'm put 0:38:39.480 --> 0:38:46.399 in a situation like that. Hi, Hello, how are you. 0:38:48.640 --> 0:38:48.839 Man? 0:38:48.920 --> 0:38:50.279 I'm good lyle how are you? 0:38:51.880 --> 0:38:54.080 I'm hanging in there. 0:38:54.760 --> 0:39:00.160 I'm trying to be conscious of the fact that it 0:39:01.080 --> 0:39:03.280 I exist on the earth right now. 0:39:03.640 --> 0:39:04.360 That's beautiful. 0:39:05.000 --> 0:39:08.439 I'm working on the same thing, and mostly it's from 0:39:08.600 --> 0:39:11.960 listening to your show and trying to be more open 0:39:12.120 --> 0:39:17.920 and honest about my feelings and my situation with myself 0:39:18.040 --> 0:39:21.719 and the people around me. It's huge for me to 0:39:22.320 --> 0:39:23.759 start that. 0:39:23.760 --> 0:39:26.360 That's a lot, that's that's spiritual. 0:39:29.040 --> 0:39:31.920 I would agree. I mean, it's been a I've been 0:39:31.920 --> 0:39:35.160 listening to your show for like, I don't know, probably 0:39:35.440 --> 0:39:38.120 two years or so now, and you know, I don't 0:39:39.440 --> 0:39:43.040 I hadn't really done much podcast listening before that, and 0:39:43.120 --> 0:39:47.040 now I listen to multiple podcasts like THEO Vonn's Weekend 0:39:47.440 --> 0:39:49.880 is Great and some other ones that I really enjoy, 0:39:50.880 --> 0:39:54.360 but yours really helped with that personal you know, people 0:39:54.400 --> 0:39:56.560 really open up on this show, you know, and it's 0:39:56.600 --> 0:39:59.360 helped me open up to myself and to my family 0:39:59.400 --> 0:40:02.440 and to my co workers about things that before I 0:40:02.480 --> 0:40:04.280 would just not communicate about. 0:40:05.640 --> 0:40:08.799 That's so fascinating to me, man, because I was thinking 0:40:08.840 --> 0:40:09.680 about this the other day. 0:40:09.800 --> 0:40:11.040 I I really. 0:40:12.440 --> 0:40:15.000 You know, when I started my whole adventure on the internet, 0:40:15.160 --> 0:40:16.920 you know, I wanted to be a comedian and I 0:40:16.960 --> 0:40:18.799 did that for a long time, and I wanted to 0:40:18.840 --> 0:40:22.680 make things that were just like expressly funny. And now 0:40:22.680 --> 0:40:29.400 I've like accidentally created fucking Gecko Oprah for better or worse, 0:40:30.480 --> 0:40:35.319 And I don't know, I guess I'm I'm glad to 0:40:35.360 --> 0:40:38.400 hear that it's helped you out in what seems to 0:40:38.440 --> 0:40:40.839 be a pretty profound way. 0:40:43.080 --> 0:40:44.680 What it has helped. 0:40:44.719 --> 0:40:48.600 It's also been negative because it's helped It's brought out 0:40:48.760 --> 0:40:51.319 a lot of like you know, when you're open and 0:40:51.400 --> 0:40:56.960 honest with yourself. That can be you know, very intense 0:40:58.040 --> 0:41:01.200 and very dark at times. To just like take your 0:41:01.200 --> 0:41:05.120 situation as it is and try and be objective and 0:41:05.239 --> 0:41:10.040 you know, really tell yourself what's going on. Yes, I've 0:41:10.040 --> 0:41:12.479 been struggling with that too, but it's good and bad 0:41:12.560 --> 0:41:15.520 because then you can try and rise above and grow 0:41:15.600 --> 0:41:19.520 from the things that are possible to grow from. 0:41:19.600 --> 0:41:22.920 Man, you should be the therapy gecko. 0:41:26.040 --> 0:41:30.080 Oh man, Man, I love your show. I love all 0:41:30.120 --> 0:41:32.760 the guests you bring on, and you know, I definitely 0:41:32.760 --> 0:41:35.560 would love to like do something like like that, but 0:41:35.640 --> 0:41:36.600 I'm so busy. 0:41:37.400 --> 0:41:40.400 Listen, listen enough about enough about me. I want to 0:41:40.960 --> 0:41:42.840 I want to know about you, Jordan. You're telling me 0:41:42.840 --> 0:41:46.200 a whole bunch of stuff out here, all right. So, well, 0:41:46.280 --> 0:41:47.840 I don't even know where to start. Give me a minute. 0:41:47.880 --> 0:41:48.360 So you. 0:41:49.960 --> 0:41:53.279 Said you had to. You said you faced yourself and 0:41:53.280 --> 0:41:55.160 that was negative. How is it negative? 0:41:57.800 --> 0:41:58.120 Uh? 0:41:58.120 --> 0:42:01.319 Well, I'm about to turn thirty, and you know, there 0:42:01.320 --> 0:42:04.400 are certain aspects of my life that I thought I 0:42:04.480 --> 0:42:08.000 would either have a not accomplished but kind of have 0:42:08.120 --> 0:42:11.360 a roadmap to success for by the time I was thirty. 0:42:12.200 --> 0:42:16.160 That some of those things I haven't even started. And 0:42:16.280 --> 0:42:18.319 some things, you know, I'm you know, I'm working hard 0:42:18.360 --> 0:42:20.800 and doing my thing, but you know, talking about like 0:42:20.920 --> 0:42:26.400 retirement and trying to build like a network of different 0:42:26.440 --> 0:42:29.720 means of income because one single income really just does 0:42:29.840 --> 0:42:33.239 not fucking do it anymore. So you have to try 0:42:33.239 --> 0:42:37.160 and increase, you know, not just your one revenue stream and. 0:42:37.080 --> 0:42:37.680 Get a raise. 0:42:37.800 --> 0:42:40.440 But you need a side hustle. Everybody needs a fucking 0:42:40.480 --> 0:42:42.360 side hustle these days to survive. 0:42:43.400 --> 0:42:48.600 So you're you're facing yourself and you're looking at your 0:42:48.640 --> 0:42:51.560 situation and you feel as though as though, what, like 0:42:51.600 --> 0:42:55.120 you haven't accomplished to things you hope you would accomplish 0:42:55.160 --> 0:42:58.200 by now, or you haven't set yourself up for success 0:42:58.239 --> 0:42:59.320 in the way you hope you would. 0:43:01.040 --> 0:43:04.040 Yeah, not that not accomplishments. It's more of like setting 0:43:04.080 --> 0:43:07.799 myself up for success. Like, you know, there's certain situations 0:43:07.800 --> 0:43:10.440 that I deal with on a day to day basis 0:43:10.480 --> 0:43:15.000 that you know, I feel like I shouldn't have to. 0:43:15.520 --> 0:43:17.600 Not that I'm better than or that you know, we 0:43:17.760 --> 0:43:21.120 just you know, I just I put in, you know, 0:43:21.360 --> 0:43:23.960 into my career a lot, and I make really good 0:43:23.960 --> 0:43:26.799 food and I make I make good money, but things 0:43:26.840 --> 0:43:29.360 are just so much more expensive and harder to attain 0:43:29.800 --> 0:43:32.399 in this day and age, you know, than they were 0:43:32.440 --> 0:43:35.239 even just a couple of years ago, so that I 0:43:35.239 --> 0:43:40.920 haven't gotten raises you know, in in you know, going 0:43:40.920 --> 0:43:45.759 with the the rise of cost of living, so it's 0:43:45.800 --> 0:43:48.440 just difficult just to hang on to the same exact 0:43:49.000 --> 0:43:51.080 standard of living, you know. 0:43:51.280 --> 0:43:55.560 Yes, yes, the economy this is bad. 0:43:56.080 --> 0:43:58.200 That's my only that's my only announce That's the my 0:43:58.320 --> 0:44:01.520 complete and utter analysis of the economy, because I have 0:44:01.600 --> 0:44:03.319 no idea how the world works. But yes, no, it 0:44:03.360 --> 0:44:05.840 is fucked and things are getting a lot more expensive. 0:44:06.640 --> 0:44:08.920 And smarter people than us can tell us why we 0:44:08.960 --> 0:44:10.239 can just say economy bad? 0:44:10.960 --> 0:44:14.839 Yeah, sure, for sure. All right, So. 0:44:16.480 --> 0:44:18.360 I mean tell me, you're it sounds like you're in 0:44:18.440 --> 0:44:24.080 this very lifey, spiritually space and you know you've been 0:44:24.120 --> 0:44:29.040 struggling with things not being as sufficient as you thought 0:44:29.040 --> 0:44:32.760 they were. What are some of the positives that you've been. 0:44:33.440 --> 0:44:37.360 I have a beautiful family, and you know, I have 0:44:37.520 --> 0:44:39.840 grown so much over the past few years in my 0:44:39.960 --> 0:44:43.279 skill sets, and you know, I'm a chef and I've 0:44:43.360 --> 0:44:47.560 learned so many different techniques over the past few years, 0:44:47.800 --> 0:44:51.960 and I really have grown in the regional cuisines that 0:44:52.080 --> 0:44:55.600 I know and the different ingredients that I know off 0:44:55.600 --> 0:44:58.000 the top of my head. You know, I'm able to 0:44:58.040 --> 0:45:02.080 put different dishes together based on different ingredients I've already tasted, 0:45:02.200 --> 0:45:05.000 and I can do that in my mind as opposed 0:45:05.080 --> 0:45:08.400 to not knowing how you know different things taste and 0:45:08.520 --> 0:45:11.560 kind of having like question marks, if that makes sense, 0:45:11.640 --> 0:45:15.040 you can kind of put the pieces together because you 0:45:15.080 --> 0:45:18.120 have more of a palette and it you know, it's 0:45:18.480 --> 0:45:20.480 that's been a huge ride for me over the past 0:45:20.480 --> 0:45:25.920 few years, just that accumulation of knowledge what kinds of 0:45:25.960 --> 0:45:26.919 things are good and bad? 0:45:27.040 --> 0:45:29.640 You do you work at like a like a restaurant 0:45:29.719 --> 0:45:31.759 of some kind or a food. 0:45:31.600 --> 0:45:36.520 Truck or Yeah, I run two different restaurants. I wish 0:45:36.560 --> 0:45:40.400 I ran a lemonade stand. Un run two different restaurant kitchens, 0:45:41.280 --> 0:45:43.000 one of them pretty laid back, but one of them 0:45:43.000 --> 0:45:51.360 pretty busy. Uh, it's it's just managing people. Yeah, Basically, 0:45:51.520 --> 0:45:56.480 kitchen workers are hard workers and you know, it's the 0:45:56.520 --> 0:45:59.320 backbone of society. But they don't make that much money. 0:45:59.520 --> 0:46:01.960 So like I people that I can't pay that high 0:46:02.000 --> 0:46:05.560 of a wage, so I lose quality people constantly to 0:46:05.640 --> 0:46:09.680 new opportunities. So it's just a revolving door of people 0:46:09.719 --> 0:46:12.279 that you train and leave, and train and leave, and 0:46:13.160 --> 0:46:17.080 it's just how it is, though you get used to it. 0:46:17.080 --> 0:46:18.280 It's crazy. 0:46:18.400 --> 0:46:20.960 You said you wanted to tell you said specifically on 0:46:21.000 --> 0:46:23.080 this thing that you wanted to talk about what you 0:46:24.200 --> 0:46:26.520 deal with on a day to day basis. Was there 0:46:26.520 --> 0:46:28.160 anything in particular that you had in mind. 0:46:30.480 --> 0:46:33.960 Yeah, definitely. You know, if you go out to a restaurant, 0:46:35.000 --> 0:46:39.480 and you know, I'm not trying to be disrespectful to anybody, 0:46:40.000 --> 0:46:43.080 but if you're at a restaurant and you're frustrated with 0:46:43.160 --> 0:46:47.640 the staff, keep it to yourself. You know, we're already 0:46:47.719 --> 0:46:50.600 doing the best that we can. Generally, not everyone is, 0:46:51.480 --> 0:46:54.439 but most of us are doing the best that we can, 0:46:54.920 --> 0:46:57.640 and we have minimal labor that we're allowed to use. 0:46:58.239 --> 0:46:59.799 You know, you're like, oh, well, why aren't there enough 0:46:59.800 --> 0:47:02.320 people we'll here? Well, it's because my boss said, I 0:47:02.360 --> 0:47:04.800 can only have this much labor on my clock. Ever, 0:47:05.320 --> 0:47:08.600 I'm sorry, you know, you can't. Don't get mad at me, please, 0:47:09.160 --> 0:47:10.839 you know, my my boss just tell me what to 0:47:10.840 --> 0:47:13.520 do and we all do the best that we can. 0:47:14.239 --> 0:47:16.600 And if you want to eat food, that you didn't cook. 0:47:17.160 --> 0:47:19.160 You got to wait and you have to be humble, 0:47:19.719 --> 0:47:21.560 or you've got to go home and cook your own food. 0:47:22.160 --> 0:47:22.360 You know. 0:47:23.040 --> 0:47:28.080 Sorry, Yeah, yeah, that's uh, I don't know. 0:47:28.120 --> 0:47:31.360 That's just a mess. That's it's getting getting food. 0:47:31.960 --> 0:47:34.719 I will say, the way that we get food nowadays 0:47:34.920 --> 0:47:37.600 is always at least faster than how we got food before. 0:47:37.680 --> 0:47:44.160 We had to actually kill chickens ourselves and extrapolate their 0:47:44.320 --> 0:47:49.400 their organs and uh, you know, pray to God to 0:47:49.640 --> 0:47:52.759 smite them with thunder to cook it. And now you 0:47:52.920 --> 0:47:55.040 just kind of yell at a guy and he brings 0:47:55.080 --> 0:47:58.880 you macerella sticks. So I think that this system we 0:47:58.960 --> 0:48:01.879 have right now, you know, even though some people think 0:48:01.920 --> 0:48:05.040 it's insufficient, I think it's pretty better than what we 0:48:05.120 --> 0:48:09.200 had before, even though the economy. Actually, I'm gonna I 0:48:09.200 --> 0:48:10.920 was gonna say, even though the economy is worse now 0:48:10.920 --> 0:48:14.280 than it was then. I don't know anything about history 0:48:14.360 --> 0:48:16.600 or the universe, but it's probably better than it was 0:48:17.160 --> 0:48:19.479 back when we were hunting things. 0:48:21.960 --> 0:48:28.360 There wasn't even money a. 0:48:30.800 --> 0:48:33.960 Man. Other than that, I would like to tell you 0:48:33.960 --> 0:48:36.080 know a story about a dishwasher that I had. 0:48:36.960 --> 0:48:38.440 Oh, sure, I go. 0:48:40.640 --> 0:48:40.960 Light on. 0:48:41.320 --> 0:48:45.640 I worked downtown. I had a really cool dishwasher and 0:48:45.800 --> 0:48:48.160 he was most definitely a crackhead, but he was a 0:48:48.239 --> 0:48:51.640 great guy. He just happened to smoke crack and come 0:48:51.680 --> 0:48:54.440 to work basically every day. But he would come to 0:48:54.440 --> 0:48:58.400 work every day in a three piece suit, uh you know, 0:48:58.520 --> 0:49:03.520 dress pants, button up shirt and a tie sometimes the best. 0:49:03.680 --> 0:49:06.200 And he would wash dishes in this super busy downtown 0:49:06.239 --> 0:49:11.320 restaurant and crush it every day. And he was amazing 0:49:11.360 --> 0:49:13.000 other than the fact that he would leave and do 0:49:13.080 --> 0:49:16.440 some drugs and then come back to work, but he 0:49:16.480 --> 0:49:18.879 would do this art. And last time I saw him, 0:49:18.880 --> 0:49:21.759 he was downtown and he saw he was selling his 0:49:21.880 --> 0:49:25.480 art on the street and he was making money and freedom. 0:49:25.520 --> 0:49:27.680 If you're out there, keep doing your thing. 0:49:28.560 --> 0:49:32.759 Wow, it sounds like crack is the best thing that 0:49:32.800 --> 0:49:35.600 ever happened to that guy and empowered him to do 0:49:35.680 --> 0:49:39.040 all these things. 0:49:40.400 --> 0:49:42.359 I sure hope. So I hope he keeps going on, 0:49:42.480 --> 0:49:45.160 maybe not doing the crack, but hopefully doing his art. 0:49:45.760 --> 0:49:47.759 Look, here's the thing. It's probably not the suit. 0:49:47.960 --> 0:49:51.920 Probably it's probably not the crack that gets him through 0:49:51.960 --> 0:49:52.600 the day, but. 0:49:54.719 --> 0:49:56.600 It's the one variable I can think of. 0:50:03.520 --> 0:50:07.400 Would we all got to have something, man, I wouldn't. 0:50:07.440 --> 0:50:11.239 I'm born and raised in Memphis. I've seen the spiral 0:50:11.960 --> 0:50:15.319 of the drug epidemic personally. I went to public school, man, 0:50:15.960 --> 0:50:19.920 people started doing cracking, like fucking middle school, dude. I 0:50:19.960 --> 0:50:23.799 had a pregnant girl in my sixth grade class, Like 0:50:23.880 --> 0:50:28.480 this is you know, this is real life. You know, 0:50:29.200 --> 0:50:32.839 crack is terrible. Don't do crack, don't do heroin love 0:50:32.880 --> 0:50:35.600 your friends, tell them to stop if they're doing crazy shit. 0:50:37.040 --> 0:50:40.440 I hope that that's on the menu of your restaurant, 0:50:40.560 --> 0:50:42.480 you know how they have like the about section. 0:50:45.840 --> 0:50:47.480 You should put that on that which part. 0:50:49.800 --> 0:50:50.479 Don't do crack? 0:50:50.680 --> 0:50:52.600 I already forgot it. Don't do crack. That's good. 0:50:53.840 --> 0:50:55.160 We'll listen to it maybe later. 0:50:55.960 --> 0:50:56.480 Love you all. 0:50:57.120 --> 0:50:58.680 Thanks Jordan, take Caren. 0:50:58.680 --> 0:51:00.680 But I really do appreciate you. Thank you so much 0:51:00.680 --> 0:51:02.880 for everything to man. Keep doing it as long as 0:51:02.880 --> 0:51:03.520 it fulfills you. 0:51:03.600 --> 0:51:06.120 By I'm gonna try. I'm gonna try. Thank you, Jordan. 0:51:06.160 --> 0:51:06.680 I appreciate you. 0:51:06.719 --> 0:51:06.879 Man. 0:51:11.400 --> 0:51:17.120 Well, I mean, I don't know. I had a friend 0:51:17.239 --> 0:51:22.640 who smoked crack once and he said it was pretty good, 0:51:24.239 --> 0:51:28.080 So you know, take that for whatever you will. 0:51:31.200 --> 0:51:35.799 Hello, Hello, how are you. 0:51:38.120 --> 0:51:38.319 Good? 0:51:38.360 --> 0:51:38.919 How are you doing. 0:51:40.400 --> 0:51:46.040 I'm doing Okay, I'm a gecko on the computer. How's 0:51:46.120 --> 0:51:46.640 life going. 0:51:49.360 --> 0:51:52.840 It's uh, it's teetering right now, my friend teetering. 0:51:53.640 --> 0:51:55.040 Why Why is it petering? 0:51:57.360 --> 0:52:01.080 Well, just uh, it just feels like my world kind 0:52:01.080 --> 0:52:04.640 of crushing around me, simply because I'm in a dilemma 0:52:04.680 --> 0:52:10.520 where I run the family business and my pops is 0:52:10.520 --> 0:52:14.719 getting old and he's getting ready to retire and he's 0:52:14.800 --> 0:52:17.239 leaning towards our not leaning towards, but he's planning on 0:52:17.880 --> 0:52:22.520 giving this to me, and I'm just not feeling it, 0:52:22.960 --> 0:52:27.840 not anymore. Have done that for too long, and the 0:52:27.920 --> 0:52:30.000 only problem with me leaving is that if I leave, 0:52:30.239 --> 0:52:33.680 the door is closed, and eventually I school over my bent. 0:52:35.960 --> 0:52:37.000 So I don't know what to do. 0:52:37.760 --> 0:52:41.759 Okay, So you're telling me that your father has this 0:52:41.840 --> 0:52:46.359 repair shop. He is retiring and either you take over 0:52:46.400 --> 0:52:47.840 the business or the business closes. 0:52:50.200 --> 0:52:53.560 Essentially, I'm going. 0:52:53.560 --> 0:52:54.880 To give you my opinion immediately. 0:52:55.120 --> 0:52:58.279 It sounds like this is totally his problem, dude, This 0:52:58.880 --> 0:53:01.920 is not your problem at all. Uh, this is your 0:53:02.000 --> 0:53:04.640 dad's business. This is this is your dad's Let mean, 0:53:04.800 --> 0:53:05.319 I'll hear you out. 0:53:05.320 --> 0:53:07.320 What are we gonna say? 0:53:07.480 --> 0:53:07.799 We like? 0:53:07.920 --> 0:53:09.799 So the only problem is is that I'm gonna be 0:53:09.920 --> 0:53:16.440 leaving this to go do 'otentially the same thing, but 0:53:16.560 --> 0:53:17.759 I'm just gonna get paid more. 0:53:19.560 --> 0:53:19.920 Okay. 0:53:21.560 --> 0:53:25.480 That's that's my main like my main guilt, I guess, 0:53:25.480 --> 0:53:28.920 because like some of these thoughts, they're literally you can, 0:53:29.080 --> 0:53:33.239 like less than a mile away from here. I would 0:53:33.239 --> 0:53:36.840 physically pass by this location, you know, and I don't know. 0:53:36.880 --> 0:53:38.440 It's kind of tough to I don't know, to. 0:53:38.400 --> 0:53:41.000 Think about, Kevin. 0:53:41.000 --> 0:53:43.440 You're your own person, okay, you don't. You don't owe 0:53:43.480 --> 0:53:48.240 anything to your dad. Your dad's business is his responsibility. 0:53:49.920 --> 0:53:51.640 So you know, you have your own life and you 0:53:51.680 --> 0:53:53.520 make your own decisions that are the best for you, 0:53:54.719 --> 0:53:58.320 not just you know, to to service your parents. Uh 0:53:58.400 --> 0:54:00.480 tell me about your dad's reaction to all this? 0:54:00.520 --> 0:54:02.839 What is he doing? Is he pressuring you any any 0:54:02.840 --> 0:54:03.279 which way? 0:54:05.520 --> 0:54:08.719 Well, so, like essentially, like you know, it's been I 0:54:08.800 --> 0:54:11.879 don't working here since you know, I was essentially nine 0:54:11.920 --> 0:54:14.560 years old, you know, just helping around or whatever. So 0:54:14.600 --> 0:54:16.319 it's always been the idea. He's always put it into 0:54:16.320 --> 0:54:20.040 my mind that this was going to be mine. The 0:54:20.080 --> 0:54:22.439 only problem is now that I see once I get 0:54:22.440 --> 0:54:26.600 older and stuff is like his business mentality, this isn't there. 0:54:27.800 --> 0:54:29.600 So when I see that, you know, and I see 0:54:29.920 --> 0:54:32.080 like other shops in the same field, you know, doing 0:54:32.120 --> 0:54:34.600 these crazy things and advancing and everything, and I feel 0:54:34.600 --> 0:54:38.040 like we're constant. I told him that, and he kind 0:54:38.040 --> 0:54:41.680 of blew up at me, because, like I said, it's 0:54:41.719 --> 0:54:45.759 a it's a horrible reality. But the reality is is 0:54:45.760 --> 0:54:51.200 that if I leave, that's it. So he kind of 0:54:51.200 --> 0:54:56.440 blew up at me and essentially kind of tried guilt 0:54:56.480 --> 0:55:00.000 to me into it by telling me that. But I'm 0:55:00.000 --> 0:55:02.040 I mean the way he treats me, in the way 0:55:02.200 --> 0:55:05.839 kind of how it goes, you know, just I could 0:55:05.880 --> 0:55:09.080 be working a lot less and getting paid at least 0:55:09.120 --> 0:55:12.160 a little bit more or a lot more, depending on what. 0:55:12.200 --> 0:55:14.719 Specifically or where I specifically choose to build. 0:55:16.680 --> 0:55:19.759 Okay, so you told your father that, I'm sorry, did 0:55:19.800 --> 0:55:23.360 you say that your dad has business practices that you 0:55:23.360 --> 0:55:23.719 don't like. 0:55:26.400 --> 0:55:31.040 I'm not business practices he just doesn't have. He I mean, like, 0:55:31.239 --> 0:55:33.680 he's a smart man. This is his first business that 0:55:33.719 --> 0:55:36.400 he's had. It's just that I feel like he's gotten 0:55:36.440 --> 0:55:38.360 to the point where he got bored of the business 0:55:39.000 --> 0:55:43.040 and he's no longer trying to put more money into it. 0:55:43.040 --> 0:55:45.359 It's just whatever comes out of it comes out of it. 0:55:45.600 --> 0:55:46.120 And that's it. 0:55:46.360 --> 0:55:48.319 Which in my mind, you know, you have to put 0:55:48.360 --> 0:55:50.960 money in. You have to spend money to make money. 0:55:51.040 --> 0:55:53.120 You can't just be out of constant. 0:55:53.280 --> 0:55:54.080 Just like anything else. 0:55:54.120 --> 0:55:55.960 You have to put the effort in to get something out. 0:55:56.560 --> 0:55:59.279 Okay, Well, I mean Kevin, what I said. You know, 0:55:59.320 --> 0:56:04.320 it's still stands firm. Your dad not having a plan 0:56:04.760 --> 0:56:08.400 for you know, his business opening or failing. 0:56:08.400 --> 0:56:09.760 I mean, that's that's his problem. 0:56:09.800 --> 0:56:09.960 You know. 0:56:10.000 --> 0:56:12.720 It says you're twenty one years old, you're an adult, 0:56:12.840 --> 0:56:16.600 You're your own person. You can still love your father, 0:56:17.320 --> 0:56:19.600 you could still have a great relationship with your father, 0:56:20.040 --> 0:56:22.799 but your father can't dictate what you do with your 0:56:22.800 --> 0:56:23.960 life and the decisions that. 0:56:23.920 --> 0:56:26.280 You make you and you can't let them. 0:56:26.120 --> 0:56:33.359 Do that at this point, right. 0:56:33.480 --> 0:56:36.400 I mean, like that's what I've been thinking too. And 0:56:36.440 --> 0:56:38.279 you know, like my tool guys that come, because I 0:56:38.320 --> 0:56:40.680 have my tool bodies that come, and like my snap 0:56:40.680 --> 0:56:42.520 On and my mat Co and my Cornwall, they all 0:56:42.560 --> 0:56:45.239 come and I have had the same conversation with them 0:56:45.360 --> 0:56:47.800 just because they see all the same people in my field. 0:56:48.400 --> 0:56:51.080 So maybe they have like job openings or somebody looking 0:56:51.080 --> 0:56:52.879 for a job, and I talked to them and they 0:56:52.920 --> 0:56:55.080 all tell me the same thing. But it just feels 0:56:55.120 --> 0:56:58.440 like something in my heart or like something is just 0:56:58.480 --> 0:57:01.920 like stopping me. I know, like mentally, I know that 0:57:02.000 --> 0:57:06.480 I should I shouldn't like advance myself, I should be 0:57:06.480 --> 0:57:10.120 better for myself. Well, but I don't know what's stopping me. 0:57:10.719 --> 0:57:11.520 Let me ask you this. 0:57:11.680 --> 0:57:12.080 Have you. 0:57:14.640 --> 0:57:16.520 Have you ever gone against your father? Have you ever 0:57:16.760 --> 0:57:19.240 entered into a conflict with him or disagreed with him? 0:57:19.360 --> 0:57:21.800 Or I guess I don't want to. I don't want 0:57:21.800 --> 0:57:23.480 to say stood up to him because that seems a 0:57:23.480 --> 0:57:24.840 little too dramatic. 0:57:24.960 --> 0:57:29.080 But you know what I'm saying, Yeah. 0:57:28.920 --> 0:57:31.680 I get you, and and to be honest with you, 0:57:31.760 --> 0:57:36.800 like not really no, I don't know, just just how 0:57:36.920 --> 0:57:39.800 my family grew up, you know, just what my dad says. 0:57:40.080 --> 0:57:43.800 My dad says essentially just something I don't know. It's 0:57:43.800 --> 0:57:45.320 not like he beat me or anything. It's not like 0:57:45.360 --> 0:57:50.280 I was abused like torn like just it's just something 0:57:50.400 --> 0:57:53.120 like it's something that's a part of me. What my 0:57:53.160 --> 0:57:55.240 boy says, what my dad says, whether I like it 0:57:55.360 --> 0:57:55.560 or not. 0:57:56.240 --> 0:57:58.320 Yeah, And you know what, Listen while you're growing up. 0:57:58.520 --> 0:58:00.840 You know, when you're sixteen, you know, before you're eighteen, 0:58:01.000 --> 0:58:04.720 and and you know any time after the age of 0:58:04.760 --> 0:58:09.840 eighteen where you find yourself financially dependent upon him. You know, yeah, 0:58:09.880 --> 0:58:12.080 that's true. You know he's he's your dad, he's that's 0:58:12.120 --> 0:58:15.520 the rules, whatever. But this is not the case anymore. 0:58:15.320 --> 0:58:18.280 You're twenty one years old. You have your own skills, 0:58:18.560 --> 0:58:21.360 you make your own money, you're your own person. And 0:58:22.480 --> 0:58:26.120 you know, I feel like you might be having this 0:58:26.240 --> 0:58:31.160 block because you've always lived by the philosophy that you know, 0:58:31.240 --> 0:58:36.120 what Dad says goes. But now you are in a 0:58:36.160 --> 0:58:40.320 position where you have transcended that you're an adult, you 0:58:40.320 --> 0:58:43.160 can make your own decisions. And now I see it 0:58:43.200 --> 0:58:49.080 as an opportunity to have a rebirthing of your relationship 0:58:49.120 --> 0:58:54.280 with your dad that is based less upon you know, 0:58:54.880 --> 0:59:03.200 something authoritative or businessy or anything like that, and based 0:59:03.320 --> 0:59:08.320 solely upon he's your father and you love him, and 0:59:08.360 --> 0:59:11.800 that's that's the foundation of your relationship more so than uh, 0:59:12.480 --> 0:59:15.400 you know, anyone having control over over anyone else. 0:59:17.240 --> 0:59:22.280 Right, right, I mean, but I guess my other problem 0:59:22.360 --> 0:59:28.680 is my my my only other problement is recently because 0:59:28.680 --> 0:59:31.240 I told him this like maybe three four days ago, 0:59:31.360 --> 0:59:33.680 like when I finally growed up the courage to talk 0:59:33.760 --> 0:59:36.560 to him, he kind of started giving me the cold shoulder. 0:59:37.720 --> 0:59:43.360 So I can only imagine if I really left you, 0:59:43.400 --> 0:59:45.479 see what I mean. That's that's my my other other thing. 0:59:45.480 --> 0:59:49.000 About well, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, he's your dad needs to 0:59:49.000 --> 0:59:49.400 grow up. 0:59:51.360 --> 0:59:52.320 I don't know what else to say. 0:59:52.320 --> 0:59:54.000 I mean, if he's given you the cold shoulder, if 0:59:54.000 --> 0:59:58.440 he's being you know, a baby about it, uh, you know, 0:59:59.080 --> 1:00:01.640 at a certain point, and it's it's it's it's I 1:00:01.680 --> 1:00:03.360 know it's hard because you don't want your dad to 1:00:03.400 --> 1:00:04.000 ignore you. 1:00:05.240 --> 1:00:07.560 But you can't. 1:00:07.680 --> 1:00:10.960 You can't bend to that. I mean, that's fucked up 1:00:11.000 --> 1:00:14.400 that he's giving you the cold shoulder. That that's not right, 1:00:15.280 --> 1:00:18.880 and you you don't. You can't be out here rewarding 1:00:18.960 --> 1:00:23.320 that kind of behavior bye by giving into it and 1:00:23.320 --> 1:00:29.400 and eventually eventually years will go by, your dad will 1:00:29.400 --> 1:00:33.760 get over it, you know, but you you need to 1:00:33.880 --> 1:00:36.000 be okay with him giving you the cold shoulder. 1:00:40.080 --> 1:00:42.160 I mean, I. 1:00:42.120 --> 1:00:45.680 Knew, I knew this is this is essentially what everybody 1:00:45.800 --> 1:00:49.360 like everybody, it's a universe. 1:00:49.440 --> 1:00:49.600 You know. 1:00:51.040 --> 1:00:52.160 I gotta do what I gotta do. 1:00:52.920 --> 1:00:53.360 Well, Kevin. 1:00:53.360 --> 1:00:56.440 Good luck to you, man, and you know, congratulations to 1:00:56.520 --> 1:01:00.600 you for for finally taking this uh uh big step 1:01:01.360 --> 1:01:05.880 toward you know, becoming your own person. I think it's important, 1:01:05.920 --> 1:01:09.960 it's it's important you do this now because you need 1:01:10.000 --> 1:01:13.360 to free yourself from your father so that you can 1:01:13.840 --> 1:01:16.640 move on with you know, the growth in your life. 1:01:16.760 --> 1:01:18.200 And I know it's a tough thing to do, so 1:01:18.240 --> 1:01:21.760 i'm I'm I'm excited for you that you're. 1:01:21.680 --> 1:01:22.200 Gonna do it. 1:01:24.320 --> 1:01:25.640 Yeah, thank you very much. 1:01:25.680 --> 1:01:26.800 You know that means a lot. 1:01:27.840 --> 1:01:30.160 I try to call you to the comminations will happen? 1:01:31.480 --> 1:01:32.640 Kevin? Is the anything else you want to say to 1:01:32.640 --> 1:01:33.880 the people the computer before we go? 1:01:36.080 --> 1:01:40.040 Yeah, if everybody can look in their closets, in their attics, 1:01:40.520 --> 1:01:44.840 in their mom's houses or guitar Hero guitars and dongleswe 1:01:44.880 --> 1:01:47.480 you be having a very hard time trying to play 1:01:47.480 --> 1:01:48.600 some goddamn guitar hero. 1:01:49.120 --> 1:01:50.840 So you got to do me that favor. That'd be great. 1:01:51.560 --> 1:01:51.760 Yeah. 1:01:51.760 --> 1:01:54.520 If anyone can find this man an any guitar Hero 1:01:55.280 --> 1:01:59.760 or rock band instruments, please let us know so we 1:01:59.760 --> 1:02:01.040 can get into him. 1:02:01.480 --> 1:02:04.800 Yeah yeah, post him online please and and don't charge 1:02:04.840 --> 1:02:06.960 one hundred fifty bucks. All right, that's kind of ridiculous. 1:02:06.960 --> 1:02:08.080 I'm just trying to play rock down. 1:02:08.120 --> 1:02:09.560 I'm not trying to side a business. 1:02:10.400 --> 1:02:11.320 Thank you for calling Kevin. 1:02:11.960 --> 1:02:12.320 Thank you. 1:02:12.920 --> 1:02:15.720 That's a tough situation, having to stand up to your parents. 1:02:18.240 --> 1:02:20.800 I'm glad that the people around kay when he said, 1:02:20.800 --> 1:02:22.280 this is what everyone's been telling me. I'm glad that 1:02:22.280 --> 1:02:24.640 people around him have been telling him this true. And 1:02:25.040 --> 1:02:27.440 I think people know at this point, you know, it 1:02:27.560 --> 1:02:30.040 sucks to hear that his dad is being a baby 1:02:30.080 --> 1:02:37.720 about it. And that's fucking really hard because because I 1:02:37.720 --> 1:02:40.520 think from a it's interesting from our perspective, From the 1:02:40.560 --> 1:02:45.560 outsider perspective, this feels like, this feels very easy. This 1:02:45.680 --> 1:02:51.040 feels like the the notion of Okay, my father doesn't 1:02:51.080 --> 1:02:53.800 control me comes very easy when you're looking at it 1:02:53.840 --> 1:02:56.320 from an outside perspective. But I'm trying to I'm really 1:02:56.360 --> 1:02:59.280 thinking about it from Kevin's position, where you know, he's 1:02:59.280 --> 1:03:03.240 twenty one years old, so for twenty one years, his 1:03:03.480 --> 1:03:09.800 brain has been fully conditioned that what his father says 1:03:09.880 --> 1:03:12.920 goes and now he you know, it's not as easy 1:03:12.960 --> 1:03:14.640 for me as you know, for me to say, oh, well, 1:03:14.640 --> 1:03:16.360 your dad hasn't known you. It's like, great, it's easy 1:03:16.400 --> 1:03:19.600 to say, but the reality is is this guy's got 1:03:19.600 --> 1:03:24.920 to now be tasked with breaking twenty one years of 1:03:25.440 --> 1:03:28.800 conditioning in order to move forward, which is tough. 1:03:28.880 --> 1:03:31.280 I think he'll do it. I don't know. 1:03:31.360 --> 1:03:33.680 I never know if people are gonna actually do any 1:03:33.680 --> 1:03:36.960 of these things, but I hope he does, and good 1:03:37.040 --> 1:03:37.800 luck to him. 1:03:38.200 --> 1:03:41.680 Everything again goes on the line, taking your phone calls 1:03:41.760 --> 1:03:45.360 every nine. Everything goes to his eye. He's teaching you 1:03:45.520 --> 1:03:54.600 cloud in the metery of life, but he's not an expert.