Speaker 1: Hey, folks, it's Lyle get this. I'm coming to over
Speaker 1: forty cities across the United States, the UK, Europe and
Speaker 1: Australia to do this here Therapy Gecko Podcast Live. These
Speaker 1: shows will involve bringing folks from the audience up on
Speaker 1: stage to talk to a gecko about whatever they want,
Speaker 1: just like we do on the podcast. The shows are
Speaker 1: completely unplanned, completely unpredictable, and they will be a lot
Speaker 1: of fun. So if you're a fan of the podcast,
Speaker 1: you should definitely come out. Tickets are available right now
Speaker 1: at therapy geckotour dot com and you should get them
Speaker 1: before they are sold out. That's therapy geckotour dot Com
Speaker 1: will put the link in the episode description as well.
Speaker 1: The live shows are are very fun, they're very geko wee,
Speaker 1: and I hope to see you there.
Speaker 2: All right, let's get into the episode.
Speaker 3: Hello, Hi, how you doing today?
Speaker 2: I'm doing good? How are you?
Speaker 4: You know?
Speaker 5: Not too bad? Not too bad?
Speaker 2: What's your name? Pal?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 5: Madame is Tony?
Speaker 2: How you doing, Tony? I'm doing good? How you doing?
Speaker 5: Oh? You know, like I said, not too bad, just
Speaker 5: kind of hanging in there.
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, well listen man, uh we can I don't
Speaker 1: know if you know how any of this stuff works,
Speaker 1: but if we can, we what do you want? Is
Speaker 1: there anything in particular you want to talk about today?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know. Well actually I have seen a few
Speaker 5: of your streams. You really do sound different over the
Speaker 5: phone as opposed to the stream.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Well I kind of called me up gone for a second.
Speaker 1: I I well, everyone kind of sounds the same over
Speaker 1: the phone, so I guess that could be why. But well,
Speaker 1: but anyway, man, I mean, what is it that you
Speaker 1: wanted to talk about?
Speaker 6: Uh?
Speaker 5: Yeah, So I've been like, uh, like struggling in my
Speaker 5: like uh love life, you know, said ruality, that kind
Speaker 5: of that kind of DeLeo.
Speaker 2: Sure.
Speaker 5: How so, so I've always been like straight, I've always
Speaker 5: considered myself straight, I suppose. And you know, I was
Speaker 5: on uh what you call it hinge and I don't know,
Speaker 5: I ended up matching with somebody and it turns out
Speaker 5: that they were a trans woman, right m hm. And
Speaker 5: you know we got to talking and I did see
Speaker 5: it on a profile like afterwards, and I was like, oh,
Speaker 5: you know that's cool, that's fine. I don't know what
Speaker 5: it was, but I just kept talking to her. We
Speaker 5: ended up going out beat, and I found it really interesting,
Speaker 5: you know, went on a couple of dates, and I
Speaker 5: don't know, I just, uh, it's different. It is not
Speaker 5: for me, okay, and uh, you know, I don't know
Speaker 5: if it is. I don't want say it's like scary
Speaker 5: or anything like that, but it's different for me.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: So I guess tell me more about the the kind
Speaker 1: of like you know, are you are you afraid of something?
Speaker 2: Are you? Well, how would you describe your struggle with this?
Speaker 5: Uh, there is a little bit of like m I
Speaker 5: guess there's some sort of a stigma to it. You know.
Speaker 5: I grew up, Yeah, I grew up Catholic, kind of
Speaker 5: became Christian over all, like over later there was people
Speaker 5: in my family who were like homophobic, and I kind
Speaker 5: of grew up with that mindset for a while. Sure,
Speaker 5: I'm twenty six right now. When I was in high school, though,
Speaker 5: when I got whatever high school ages, I got to
Speaker 5: a point where I was like because I'd gone to
Speaker 5: a new church and there was like so loving and accepting,
Speaker 5: and I was like, oh, okay, this is great. And
Speaker 5: then like I would see like certain certain things and
Speaker 5: I feel like disgusted almost and then I was like,
Speaker 5: wait a second, hold a pause, this doesn't core Like
Speaker 5: why why would like like it's supposed to be like
Speaker 5: a loving message. Why would I feel this kind of way,
Speaker 5: you know, like gross about it. So I kind of
Speaker 5: like try to change my tune over time, which I did.
Speaker 5: It took some time, but like I ended up like
Speaker 5: like I like, I have family, I have friends, you
Speaker 5: know in the LGBT community, So like I was able
Speaker 5: to overcome that and I just kind of like ignored
Speaker 5: everything else over time. I did end up like trying
Speaker 5: to experiment with the man before I didn't really like it.
Speaker 5: It wasn't for me. And then I don't know, I
Speaker 5: just I messed with this person, I went out with them,
Speaker 5: and I don't know, I don't know. I'm just I
Speaker 5: feel like if the answer should be obvious, but like
Speaker 5: I keep like running in circles in my head.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so tell me when you say you feel
Speaker 1: like the answer should be obvious?
Speaker 2: What what is? What is? What is the answer that
Speaker 2: you feel should be obvious?
Speaker 5: Don't worry about it? Yeah, okay, yeah, it doesn't matter
Speaker 5: right right, Like I know, like like my siblings, my
Speaker 5: my cousins, my like even my best friend. Like I know,
Speaker 5: I know, like if they were the meter, like, everything
Speaker 5: would be like all good and great, you know, yeah,
Speaker 5: my parents, like I feel like my parents, though I
Speaker 5: don't know how well that would go about if I
Speaker 5: ever like introduced her to them.
Speaker 2: Sure m hm. So you kind of know in your
Speaker 2: heart that you know.
Speaker 1: There's there's there's nothing, there's nothing wrong with your being
Speaker 1: attracted to who you're attracted to, but because of how
Speaker 1: you grew up and because of the people around you,
Speaker 1: you're having some some dissonance with it.
Speaker 2: Is that accurate?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I say so, okay, hmmm, So.
Speaker 2: Your what's your relationship like with your parents?
Speaker 5: It's good for the most part. I got loved him, obviously.
Speaker 5: I do find my mom kind of annoying, which is
Speaker 5: a terrible thing to say. My dad, I don't know,
Speaker 5: because I caught him cheating and I didn't talk to
Speaker 5: him about it. I kind of like, uh, it was
Speaker 5: kind of like a scene that I caught on my
Speaker 5: phone and I just kind of brought it to my
Speaker 5: mom right away. And this was like six seven years ago.
Speaker 5: So they have him in together since then. So he
Speaker 5: tries to act friendly with me, but I don't know
Speaker 5: if he still resents me or something for.
Speaker 1: That sure, So man, listen, I think I mean this
Speaker 1: is a this is a tough thing, like kind of
Speaker 1: freeing yourself from the judgment of your parents. But I
Speaker 1: feel like it's so necessary, right because you you should
Speaker 1: be able to feel free to, you know, sexually and
Speaker 1: romantically engage with whoever it is that you want without
Speaker 1: having to run it by your parents at the at
Speaker 1: the age of twenty six, you know. And I don't
Speaker 1: even think I don't even think you have to you
Speaker 1: have to be like, well, fuck you mom, fuck you dad,
Speaker 1: you know, from that kind of place, I think you
Speaker 1: can just be like listen, I love you guys, but
Speaker 1: you can't. You have no say in what I do
Speaker 1: with my own life.
Speaker 5: Well beyond beyond how they would feel from it, because like, yeah,
Speaker 5: you know, honestly, like they haven't like certain partner that's
Speaker 5: had in the past, Like it's like that part is
Speaker 5: kind of like whatever, Like it is a factor, but
Speaker 5: like I'm not like even like sexually right in the bedroom,
Speaker 5: Like that's not like the first time that like, you know,
Speaker 5: we slept together. Like that was very uh, it was
Speaker 5: kind of jarring in a way. I don't know. It
Speaker 5: was almost as if like I kind of turned my
Speaker 5: brain off and just kind of what went with the flow,
Speaker 5: almost like like the person as a person, you know,
Speaker 5: intellectually or even like emotionally like I'm I'm, I'm there,
Speaker 5: but like when it comes to the physical aspect, it like, uh,
Speaker 5: it's different, not what I'm used to. But like I
Speaker 5: I don't know you.
Speaker 1: You you shut your you say you say you shut
Speaker 1: your brain down.
Speaker 5: Yeah, almost like that's you know, the first time I
Speaker 5: saw them, like like we were like naked together, right
Speaker 5: like I'm sorry, I got I know, Like I'm not
Speaker 5: saying anything super crazy here, but like yeah, in that moment,
Speaker 5: it was kind of like, oh, you know, it's you
Speaker 5: know what we're walking with down there, you know, it's
Speaker 5: it's different from what I'm like actually like normally attracted.
Speaker 1: All right, I'm picking up what you're putting down for sure. Okay,
Speaker 1: So I mean look, let me ask you because I mean,
Speaker 1: m hm, so you you are not sexually attracted to
Speaker 1: a certain set of genitals.
Speaker 5: That's fair. That's a fair way to put it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, so let me ask you this then, how
Speaker 1: big of a deal is sex to you in a relationship.
Speaker 2: Is it important?
Speaker 7: It is?
Speaker 5: But it is not like, no, it's not my number
Speaker 5: one goal, all right, It's like it's a thing that
Speaker 5: people do, of course, yeah, And I'm not I'm like,
Speaker 5: that's not something I'm separated from, you know. I'm more
Speaker 5: of like passionate, romantic, kind of like sensual person as
Speaker 5: opposed to.
Speaker 2: Like, oh I can.
Speaker 1: I can tell I hear it in your voice, Tony
Speaker 1: very passionate. Well, well, listen, Matt, I mean this is
Speaker 1: the The thing is is that you can't force yourself
Speaker 1: to be sexually compatible with someone. And I think when
Speaker 1: when you get to this point where everything with this
Speaker 1: person lines up except you, guys aren't sexually compatible, then
Speaker 1: you almost have to weigh how important that is to
Speaker 1: you because you don't want to end up resenting that
Speaker 1: you know, and everyone everyone can make their own decision
Speaker 1: as to how important.
Speaker 2: That is to you.
Speaker 5: Right mhm, I mean that doesn't make sense, that's at all.
Speaker 2: Hmmm.
Speaker 1: Are you what's what's kind of your your the status
Speaker 1: with this person?
Speaker 2: Are you guys dating? Is there a uh? Is there
Speaker 2: a label on it? How long have you been seeing
Speaker 2: each other?
Speaker 5: I've been seeing it like our second date was actually
Speaker 5: New Year's there's not an official label work, like you know,
Speaker 5: like we're dating quote unquote, but we're not like like
Speaker 5: an official couple or anything like that. I mean, I'm
Speaker 5: not talking to anybody else, she says, she's not talking
Speaker 5: anybody else. I do believe us in that regard, but
Speaker 5: that's that's where it is at the moment.
Speaker 1: Apparently you told the call screen or you said that
Speaker 1: you're debating experimenting with her penis.
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, okay, So, like I mentioned, that's not something
Speaker 5: that like I'm attracted to do. That's not something that
Speaker 5: like I'm familiar with, but I do genuinely have feelings
Speaker 5: for this person. Yeah, and you know, we we have
Speaker 5: slept together and it's mostly like uh, I mean it's
Speaker 5: just the basic you know, by the being got a bomb,
Speaker 5: you know, and uh, I do want to like I
Speaker 5: want to make sure that you know, she has like enjoyment,
Speaker 5: you know, like I actually like legitimately care that, like
Speaker 5: you know whatever. Yeah, So, like.
Speaker 8: I I was thinking to myself, like I would I
Speaker 8: would be I guess willing to like you know, do
Speaker 8: something I wouldn't actually normally.
Speaker 5: Do in general, for this person.
Speaker 2: Okay, how so lam asks have you experience?
Speaker 5: Have you?
Speaker 2: Uh so you're open to experimenting to.
Speaker 1: To uh you know sexual acts involve the penis.
Speaker 2: You and you have. How how much have you experimented
Speaker 2: already so far?
Speaker 8: Oh?
Speaker 3: Man?
Speaker 5: I mean if there's no filter here, I mean I
Speaker 5: was I was hanging out with like actually somebody who
Speaker 5: I loosely work with. It was a drunk moment. We
Speaker 5: were all we were in a bunch of people went out,
Speaker 5: we were partying. We had a hotel room. Uh, nobody
Speaker 5: brought in any woman, right, like you know, as all
Speaker 5: dudes we went out like the goal was, you know,
Speaker 5: go get some women. Nobody got women? Yeah. Uh. Me
Speaker 5: and this dude were awake. Uh you know there was
Speaker 5: kissing involves. He was like, you know, touching me and everything,
Speaker 5: and I I couldn't bring myself to do more than that.
Speaker 5: But like I definitely didn't like really enjoy that truthfully. Okay,
Speaker 5: that's really it?
Speaker 2: Well, Tony, Look, I think I think it is.
Speaker 1: It's I don't know, this is such a this is
Speaker 1: a tough issue, right because I mean, look, the the
Speaker 1: whole like you know, forget about the the the kind
Speaker 1: of underlying aspects of this, like just the idea of
Speaker 1: being romantically and intellectually attracted to somebody but not being
Speaker 1: sexually compatible with them is a.
Speaker 2: Tough one, right, And I don't know. Again, I would
Speaker 2: consider how important that is to you.
Speaker 1: And also, like you said, you want her to feel
Speaker 1: pleasure as well.
Speaker 2: And you should.
Speaker 1: You should consider the idea that part of her sexual
Speaker 1: pleasure would probably involve a partner who.
Speaker 2: Is very sexually excited about them.
Speaker 1: And if that's not you, and that yeah, and you
Speaker 1: and you know that you can't force that to be you,
Speaker 1: then you almost do her a disservice by continuing to
Speaker 1: to kind of will yourself through sleeping with her, if
Speaker 1: that makes sense.
Speaker 5: No, yeah, I see what you're saying.
Speaker 7: Uh.
Speaker 1: But to all the other points that you were talking about,
Speaker 1: I I do hope that you're able to Um, I'm
Speaker 1: I'm glad that you're you're you're kind of abandoning all
Speaker 1: the programming that you grew up with that is like
Speaker 1: acting as a barrier between you and these new experiences.
Speaker 1: That sounded like it was it might have been a
Speaker 1: tough thing to do.
Speaker 3: Oh absolutely, m hm, Tony, What do you do.
Speaker 2: For a living. I'm very curious about you as a person.
Speaker 5: Uh, I'm in the military. I'm about to get out.
Speaker 2: Actually, oh yeah, what are you gonna do when you're.
Speaker 5: I don't know, if pick out the family business, probably
Speaker 5: I want to go back. I went to like, this
Speaker 5: is gonna sound so stupid. I went to school at first.
Speaker 5: I went to college for like three years. Joined the
Speaker 5: military because I was just I was not in a
Speaker 5: good place in life. I was studying criminal justice, a
Speaker 5: little bit of psychology, a little bit of corolinary arts.
Speaker 5: You know, I love cooking. Family has a restaurant, and
Speaker 5: I could see myself picking it up, you know, taking
Speaker 5: over from my dad, you know, running with it. I mean,
Speaker 5: to be honest, I feel like that's the too easy option.
Speaker 5: You know, it's just, oh yeah, take up some established
Speaker 5: business and just run with it, which I believe I
Speaker 5: will enjoy it. But you know, it's not like there
Speaker 5: there there is a desire to do something like on
Speaker 5: my own as opposed to just you know, picking up
Speaker 5: something already established.
Speaker 1: What do you want to do on your own, Tony.
Speaker 5: That's a very good question. That's a very good question.
Speaker 5: I mean, I do I do like cooking. You know,
Speaker 5: if if I were to do it on my own.
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, I was really hoping you were
Speaker 1: gonna want to open a restaurant called Tony's.
Speaker 5: Hey, you know, fat Tonys or something like that.
Speaker 1: I'd be kind of funny if any inkling of a
Speaker 1: desire to open up a restaurant called Tony's.
Speaker 2: I want to be the guy that convinces you to
Speaker 2: do it.
Speaker 5: I mean, you know, I I cooking a pizza. You
Speaker 5: know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: The pizza. You definitely cooking the pizza.
Speaker 9: Uh.
Speaker 2: You said you like, what do you cook? Tony?
Speaker 5: I do mostly cook pastas. I make a lot of sauces.
Speaker 5: I've dabbled in like Italian Mexican. I'm not you know,
Speaker 5: Italian Mexican fusion. I feel like it works really well,
Speaker 5: to be honest, I mean, you know.
Speaker 2: What happens in Mexican What what?
Speaker 10: What?
Speaker 1: What is an Italian Mexican fusion dish?
Speaker 5: You can take any sauce right, any pasta dish. You know,
Speaker 5: you just add a couple of things in there, you know.
Speaker 5: I mean, if you want to be the most basic halopenios, right,
Speaker 5: I've made this weird uh lasagna with like well there's more.
Speaker 5: It's less Mexican, but like with like plantains, right as
Speaker 5: opposed to like pasta noodles or whatever, the lasagna noodle,
Speaker 5: whatever it's called. That ship is a banger. You could
Speaker 5: mix a regueo with the lonstro vice versa. You know,
Speaker 5: just throw in a little bit of those ingredients in there,
Speaker 5: you know, substitute for toiso or or whatever, and it
Speaker 5: just all kind of brings itself together.
Speaker 1: All right, hear me out on this chicken parmesan tacos.
Speaker 5: I've made those.
Speaker 3: You have, I've made those?
Speaker 2: What are they like?
Speaker 5: You know, I feel like the idea of it worked
Speaker 5: a little bit better than the I mean maybe maybe
Speaker 5: I got I gotta like try it again. You know,
Speaker 5: I feel like I can make it work. You know,
Speaker 5: when people get chicken tomasan, you know, it's not like
Speaker 5: it's a piece of chicken that you cut up yourself.
Speaker 5: It's not already pretty cut, it's not shredded.
Speaker 8: You know.
Speaker 5: You you the name of it, the idea of it,
Speaker 5: it's like a dream. You know, there's a way to
Speaker 5: make it work. Being in you know, I've been four
Speaker 5: years in the military. I you know, I don't have
Speaker 5: a kitchen right now, so like it's mostly like I'm
Speaker 5: fucking around, you know, cooking or like if there's a
Speaker 5: barbecue something going on. But once I go home, that's
Speaker 5: when I'm going to be able to actually cook and
Speaker 5: experiment and do things again. I signed my life away
Speaker 5: for a full years. Anybody out there, just real quick,
Speaker 5: if you're thinking about doing the military, don't do it.
Speaker 5: And if you do do it, don't join don't join
Speaker 5: the Navy for the Marine Corps.
Speaker 10: That's a funny, kase.
Speaker 2: I've talked.
Speaker 1: I've said this a bunch of times on the podcast,
Speaker 1: but I've talked to people who've joined the military and
Speaker 1: it's been like the best decision they ever made. And
Speaker 1: then I talked to people where it's the opposite. You know,
Speaker 1: they hated it. One last thing. Okay, meat sauce, nachos.
Speaker 5: Easiest thing in the world. It's a anger out of
Speaker 5: ten flas stars.
Speaker 1: Tony, I really, Tony. I want to see the universe
Speaker 1: for you so badly. Where you open up your where
Speaker 1: you just you defy your parents' wishes.
Speaker 2: You you you.
Speaker 1: Open your own Mexican Italian fusion restaurant, you date whoever
Speaker 1: you want. I such a beautiful, beautiful life awaits you.
Speaker 1: Should you make your own decisions.
Speaker 2: I do see it.
Speaker 5: Check it out.
Speaker 3: Guido Beans, what is it? Guido bes Gueto bees?
Speaker 5: Don't Guido beans like Guido is like an Italian Guido
Speaker 5: Wiedo is an Italian name or whatever? The and then
Speaker 5: beings because beaners, you know what I mean? You know
Speaker 5: what I mean?
Speaker 3: I don't know absolutely.
Speaker 1: I am all right.
Speaker 2: I'll take your word for.
Speaker 1: It, Tony, Is there anything else you want to say
Speaker 1: to the people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 5: I'man just to reiterate, if you're going to join the military,
Speaker 5: the Navy and the Marine Corps don't do it.
Speaker 2: Good to know.
Speaker 1: I did watch after this they're going to make me
Speaker 1: read a fucking ad for the US military or something
Speaker 1: like that.
Speaker 3: I swear to God, I wouldn't doubt it.
Speaker 5: All right, take care, Tony, Hey, you as well appreciate it.
Speaker 10: All right.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think of one more veal burrito. Guido Beans,
Speaker 2: I'm there, Hi there.
Speaker 6: Hello, Hi?
Speaker 2: Who is this?
Speaker 4: My name is Daisy Joe.
Speaker 2: Hi, Daisy Joe. How are you?
Speaker 4: Is this wild?
Speaker 2: Yep?
Speaker 4: Why do you sound so?
Speaker 1: I don't know how to answer that question. Really, I don't.
Speaker 1: If I had an answer for you, I would tell you.
Speaker 2: But I don't have an answer.
Speaker 4: I'm so sorry. I just said, you're like my mom.
Speaker 2: What's your your Daisy Joe, what's going on, Daisy Joe?
Speaker 2: How's life?
Speaker 4: Life?
Speaker 5: It exists?
Speaker 4: We're here.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 4: I have a story to tell you.
Speaker 2: Okay, you have a story to tell me. What's the story?
Speaker 4: So, but I was like like eighteen or nineteen, I
Speaker 4: was dropping out of college and that was like a
Speaker 4: huge deal with like my family because they like forced
Speaker 4: me to like go live with this southern family. So
Speaker 4: I was like making everybody mad in the world. So
Speaker 4: I think this is like a really big deal, like
Speaker 4: crazy big thing in my life. It's really not.
Speaker 1: Okay, So you were you were your parents were kind
Speaker 1: of forcing you to drop out.
Speaker 2: It wasn't really your decision.
Speaker 4: No, they forced me to go to school. I me
Speaker 4: dropping out was like a whoa coat thing?
Speaker 2: You know, what is a woe kind of thing?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was pretty low like a right, Okay, So
Speaker 4: I feel like I'm liking the hardest part of my life. Right.
Speaker 4: It's not. But I think that because I'm eighteen and
Speaker 4: I'm driving on like the longest highway like in the world, right,
Speaker 4: and this man jumps in front of my car and
Speaker 4: I thought it was a deer, and I'm like, what
Speaker 4: the fuck? And it's like three am. So I stopped
Speaker 4: and I turn around, and I first I start tussing
Speaker 4: him out, and then I realized he's crying and he
Speaker 4: has mud up to his chest. He only has shorts on,
Speaker 4: like cargo shorts on with bales wine. He's like pulling
Speaker 4: his pants up and he starts crying about how his
Speaker 4: wife left him because he's addicted to porn and he
Speaker 4: cheated on his wife with porns. And I'm like super
Speaker 4: freaked out. So I like throw him some water and
Speaker 4: some chips, and he wants me to give him a ride,
Speaker 4: but I'm like no, because I'm an eighteen year old
Speaker 4: girl and you're an old naked man. So I let
Speaker 4: him right on top of the car.
Speaker 1: Okay, hold on, I'm sorry. Okay, I give one saying
Speaker 1: you thought you hit a deer and it turned out
Speaker 1: you hit a naked man, and so yet hit him.
Speaker 4: I came really really close.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you thought you hit him, so you pulled
Speaker 1: over to go talk to him.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I was gonna cuts him out, but then I
Speaker 4: start filing bad form.
Speaker 1: Okay, and you let him ride so so so you
Speaker 1: almost hit this guy, and then you stopped and went
Speaker 1: to get out of your car just to yell at
Speaker 1: this guy for being in the middle of the street.
Speaker 2: And then you see that he's fully like.
Speaker 4: All right, now, yeah, shorts on, they're just hanging off
Speaker 4: his body. He's got nothing, but like.
Speaker 1: All right, all right, all right, So then you let
Speaker 1: him ride on the top of your car.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Because I haven't watched enough true crime ship yet,
Speaker 4: I guess. Okay, it doesn't just wild doesn't stop there.
Speaker 4: I sang hymnals to him too.
Speaker 1: What is the climax of this story? How does this end?
Speaker 4: So I dropped him off at this gas station in
Speaker 4: the middle of nowhere, Arkansas, and I'm like, you need
Speaker 4: to stay here because somebody in the morning, like you
Speaker 4: can go to like a police station. Maybe you could,
Speaker 4: you know, find some humanitarian resources, a shelter, your wife.
Speaker 6: I don't know.
Speaker 4: So I'm driving off and there's a semi coming and
Speaker 4: as I'm driving away, he's like crying on the steps
Speaker 4: and then I see him stand up as the semis
Speaker 4: coming and he runs out in front of it, and
Speaker 4: like I didn't actually see him go splat, but I
Speaker 4: heard the like agonizing scream, and then I saw the
Speaker 4: semi coming, and then I floored it. I was going
Speaker 4: like one hundred and twenty because I didn't want to
Speaker 4: see it happen. I was just like, you know, I
Speaker 4: know what too plus two is.
Speaker 2: You know, dude, what wait, okay, that's all right.
Speaker 1: So so you dropped this guy off at a gas station.
Speaker 1: He's a complete stranger, he's crying, he's basically naked, and
Speaker 1: then you drop him off and you're like, look, man,
Speaker 1: I you know, I I don't know you. I can't
Speaker 1: really help you that further, but like stay here and
Speaker 1: you know, wait until the morning you can find someone
Speaker 1: to help you.
Speaker 2: And then you drive away. And then you as.
Speaker 1: You're driving away, you see him run and jump in
Speaker 1: front of a semi truck and get hit.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Well, I looked at that very last second it
Speaker 4: could have been like super traumatizing, but it wasn't. I
Speaker 4: was looking at the road and I was flooring it.
Speaker 3: So okay, it was too disgusting, right.
Speaker 1: Thing, How what do you what do you make of
Speaker 1: this situation? Here, How did this affect you in any
Speaker 1: way or what? What do you what's your observation here?
Speaker 4: I do too dam much with people. I do too
Speaker 4: damn much. That's how I get all much rumble. I
Speaker 4: just do too damn much for people that Okay, I
Speaker 4: don't even I don't know I need to be doing that,
Speaker 4: you know?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 4: What do you him on the size of round?
Speaker 2: Sure?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Sure? What do you?
Speaker 1: Why do you feel like you what makes you feel
Speaker 1: like you do too much for people?
Speaker 4: Because that could have gone like so bad. He could
Speaker 4: have killed me, bro, he could have actually murdered me
Speaker 4: mm hmm, but he didn't. He did like he did,
Speaker 4: he murdered himself. He did the best case scenario almost.
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's the best case scenario, but
Speaker 1: it is what happened.
Speaker 4: If somebody was gonna die, the best case scenario.
Speaker 2: Okay, So how old are you now?
Speaker 4: Huh?
Speaker 2: I said? How old? Yeah? All right?
Speaker 1: So this happened four years ago? Yeah, all right, and
Speaker 1: you felt as though the lesson you learned from it
Speaker 1: was that you do too damn much for people. That's right,
Speaker 1: and contemporarily, yes, put on yours before you help others,
Speaker 1: and you know, there's.
Speaker 2: A lot in that philosophy.
Speaker 1: So today, you know, this having happened four years ago,
Speaker 1: do you still feel as though you do too much
Speaker 1: for people?
Speaker 4: No? Okay, I think I stopped doing that. Okay, I
Speaker 4: think I do other stupid shit now, but I don't
Speaker 4: do that.
Speaker 2: Okay. What made you want to stop doing too much
Speaker 2: for people?
Speaker 4: Because instead of like, like it's just it's honestly, I
Speaker 4: don't know why, maybe kind of think like it's really
Speaker 4: not that rewarding because like I was the last person
Speaker 4: that was ever kind to this man, you know, like
Speaker 4: I sang to him, I gave him a ride, I
Speaker 4: gave him potato chips and waters, and then none of
Speaker 4: that mattered, you know, he still jumped in front of
Speaker 4: a fucking truck. Like, it doesn't feel that good to
Speaker 4: just be doing shit for people when you don't have
Speaker 4: your own ship figured it out, you know.
Speaker 1: Hmmm, It's an interesting way to think about it. So yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: So you were telling me that at that time, you
Speaker 1: were having to drop out of school even though you
Speaker 1: wanted to go to school, and you didn't feel as
Speaker 1: though you had your your life together.
Speaker 2: Correct.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Oh yeah, straight, out of high school.
Speaker 1: So all right, and so you helped out this guy
Speaker 1: by letting him ride on top of your car and
Speaker 1: singing him lullabies and getting him to a place where
Speaker 1: he could at least get some some you know, somewhere
Speaker 1: somewhere better than the middle of the street.
Speaker 4: Well yeah, and it's like an southern Arkansas too, so
Speaker 4: it was like field.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: So so, so stick with you for a second. And
Speaker 1: you now feel as though you need to work on
Speaker 1: figuring out your own life before you help other people. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: So do you feel like you have yourself? And look,
Speaker 1: nobody ever has themselves fully together? But do you feel
Speaker 1: as though you're personally at a better place now than
Speaker 1: you were then?
Speaker 4: Oh my god? Yeah, oh my god.
Speaker 7: Yeah yeah okay, And do you feel as though you
Speaker 7: have any desire to help people, like, let's say, let's
Speaker 7: say that's something like that happened to you, now, would
Speaker 7: you not have helped that guy?
Speaker 2: If that happened now.
Speaker 4: I probably honestly would have called the police station, And
Speaker 4: that's what would have been me helping, or like something
Speaker 4: like that, you know, sure, or if there's like a
Speaker 4: shelter nearby or something some kind of something not.
Speaker 9: Me, Okay, you know, I'm like, I mean, I get it.
Speaker 2: I understand. You know.
Speaker 1: Look, you're an eighteen year old girl and this guy's,
Speaker 1: you know, a random guy on the side of the road.
Speaker 1: I understand your your apprehensions in.
Speaker 2: This, Like I pretend that I don't. Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know to what degree you're obligated to to
Speaker 1: help other people, especially if you feel as though you
Speaker 1: might be at risk. Yeah, you know, I'll do the
Speaker 1: best you can, right, How do you feel like you're
Speaker 1: gonna approach.
Speaker 2: The world's moving forward?
Speaker 1: Do you do you feel a desire to help people
Speaker 1: or do you sort of feel like it's better for
Speaker 1: you to just completely focus on yourself.
Speaker 4: I feel like there's ways you can help people without
Speaker 4: like getting balls deep in it, you know.
Speaker 2: Sure, Like.
Speaker 4: I don't know, Like I don't pick up I used
Speaker 4: to pick up people, like like even before that, I
Speaker 4: like got somebody with me like a knife or something.
Speaker 4: I like pick people up on the side of the
Speaker 4: road all the time, like whatever. Like that's so which
Speaker 4: that's like such an obvious it's like a landed ass example.
Speaker 5: But like.
Speaker 4: I don't know, like I would I do like helping
Speaker 4: people like I I wanna after the season of my
Speaker 4: job and I'm gonna go to nursing school. That's a good,
Speaker 4: healthy way.
Speaker 2: To help people, I think. I think.
Speaker 1: So that's a that's a bit more of a controlled
Speaker 1: environment for helping people than the side of the road
Speaker 1: in Arkansas.
Speaker 4: True, you are correct.
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm mm hmm.
Speaker 1: Well, I'm glad that you have a sort of future
Speaker 1: plan for you to, uh, you know, help other people
Speaker 1: in a more control of the way. You bring up
Speaker 1: an interesting, an interesting kind of moral delima that I'll
Speaker 1: have to think about. Uh, Daisy, there's anything else you
Speaker 1: want to say to the people of the computer before
Speaker 1: we go.
Speaker 4: Don't pick up naked ass dudes on the side road
Speaker 4: and put your own mask on before you try to
Speaker 4: help other people, or you'll die or something. Or you
Speaker 4: might not die, you might see somebody else die, and
Speaker 4: that's weird.
Speaker 2: Thanks for calling, Daisy Joe.
Speaker 4: You're welcome anytime.
Speaker 10: Hi.
Speaker 1: Bye. I just have to say the call screener wrote
Speaker 1: down for her. H Daisy Joe has a story about
Speaker 1: seeing a guy commit suicide. Says it's funny and light.
Speaker 1: I guess that was I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't know. Yeah, okay, yeah, I don't know. I like,
Speaker 2: I get it.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say I don't get it. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna say I don't get it. There there is you.
Speaker 1: When you pick up a naked man from the street,
Speaker 1: you're running, you're running into you're you're not you're there's
Speaker 1: some risk there. Undeniably, you can't deny that risk. But
Speaker 1: is it worth the risk to help another person?
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't have an opinion on that, but we'll we'll,
Speaker 1: we'll see what happens to me next time I'm put
Speaker 1: in a situation like that. Hi, Hello, how are you.
Speaker 5: Man?
Speaker 10: I'm good lyle how are you?
Speaker 2: I'm hanging in there.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to be conscious of the fact that it
Speaker 1: I exist on the earth right now.
Speaker 5: That's beautiful.
Speaker 10: I'm working on the same thing, and mostly it's from
Speaker 10: listening to your show and trying to be more open
Speaker 10: and honest about my feelings and my situation with myself
Speaker 10: and the people around me. It's huge for me to
Speaker 10: start that.
Speaker 2: That's a lot, that's that's spiritual.
Speaker 10: I would agree. I mean, it's been a I've been
Speaker 10: listening to your show for like, I don't know, probably
Speaker 10: two years or so now, and you know, I don't
Speaker 10: I hadn't really done much podcast listening before that, and
Speaker 10: now I listen to multiple podcasts like THEO Vonn's Weekend
Speaker 10: is Great and some other ones that I really enjoy,
Speaker 10: but yours really helped with that personal you know, people
Speaker 10: really open up on this show, you know, and it's
Speaker 10: helped me open up to myself and to my family
Speaker 10: and to my co workers about things that before I
Speaker 10: would just not communicate about.
Speaker 1: That's so fascinating to me, man, because I was thinking
Speaker 1: about this the other day.
Speaker 2: I I really.
Speaker 1: You know, when I started my whole adventure on the internet,
Speaker 1: you know, I wanted to be a comedian and I
Speaker 1: did that for a long time, and I wanted to
Speaker 1: make things that were just like expressly funny. And now
Speaker 1: I've like accidentally created fucking Gecko Oprah for better or worse,
Speaker 1: And I don't know, I guess I'm I'm glad to
Speaker 1: hear that it's helped you out in what seems to
Speaker 1: be a pretty profound way.
Speaker 3: What it has helped.
Speaker 10: It's also been negative because it's helped It's brought out
Speaker 10: a lot of like you know, when you're open and
Speaker 10: honest with yourself. That can be you know, very intense
Speaker 10: and very dark at times. To just like take your
Speaker 10: situation as it is and try and be objective and
Speaker 10: you know, really tell yourself what's going on. Yes, I've
Speaker 10: been struggling with that too, but it's good and bad
Speaker 10: because then you can try and rise above and grow
Speaker 10: from the things that are possible to grow from.
Speaker 2: Man, you should be the therapy gecko.
Speaker 10: Oh man, Man, I love your show. I love all
Speaker 10: the guests you bring on, and you know, I definitely
Speaker 10: would love to like do something like like that, but
Speaker 10: I'm so busy.
Speaker 1: Listen, listen enough about enough about me. I want to
Speaker 1: I want to know about you, Jordan. You're telling me
Speaker 1: a whole bunch of stuff out here, all right. So, well,
Speaker 1: I don't even know where to start. Give me a minute.
Speaker 2: So you.
Speaker 1: Said you had to. You said you faced yourself and
Speaker 1: that was negative. How is it negative?
Speaker 7: Uh?
Speaker 10: Well, I'm about to turn thirty, and you know, there
Speaker 10: are certain aspects of my life that I thought I
Speaker 10: would either have a not accomplished but kind of have
Speaker 10: a roadmap to success for by the time I was thirty.
Speaker 10: That some of those things I haven't even started. And
Speaker 10: some things, you know, I'm you know, I'm working hard
Speaker 10: and doing my thing, but you know, talking about like
Speaker 10: retirement and trying to build like a network of different
Speaker 10: means of income because one single income really just does
Speaker 10: not fucking do it anymore. So you have to try
Speaker 10: and increase, you know, not just your one revenue stream and.
Speaker 5: Get a raise.
Speaker 10: But you need a side hustle. Everybody needs a fucking
Speaker 10: side hustle these days to survive.
Speaker 1: So you're you're facing yourself and you're looking at your
Speaker 1: situation and you feel as though as though, what, like
Speaker 1: you haven't accomplished to things you hope you would accomplish
Speaker 1: by now, or you haven't set yourself up for success
Speaker 1: in the way you hope you would.
Speaker 10: Yeah, not that not accomplishments. It's more of like setting
Speaker 10: myself up for success. Like, you know, there's certain situations
Speaker 10: that I deal with on a day to day basis
Speaker 10: that you know, I feel like I shouldn't have to.
Speaker 10: Not that I'm better than or that you know, we
Speaker 10: just you know, I just I put in, you know,
Speaker 10: into my career a lot, and I make really good
Speaker 10: food and I make I make good money, but things
Speaker 10: are just so much more expensive and harder to attain
Speaker 10: in this day and age, you know, than they were
Speaker 10: even just a couple of years ago, so that I
Speaker 10: haven't gotten raises you know, in in you know, going
Speaker 10: with the the rise of cost of living, so it's
Speaker 10: just difficult just to hang on to the same exact
Speaker 10: standard of living, you know.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, the economy this is bad.
Speaker 1: That's my only that's my only announce That's the my
Speaker 1: complete and utter analysis of the economy, because I have
Speaker 1: no idea how the world works. But yes, no, it
Speaker 1: is fucked and things are getting a lot more expensive.
Speaker 10: And smarter people than us can tell us why we
Speaker 10: can just say economy bad?
Speaker 2: Yeah, sure, for sure. All right, So.
Speaker 1: I mean tell me, you're it sounds like you're in
Speaker 1: this very lifey, spiritually space and you know you've been
Speaker 1: struggling with things not being as sufficient as you thought
Speaker 1: they were. What are some of the positives that you've been.
Speaker 10: I have a beautiful family, and you know, I have
Speaker 10: grown so much over the past few years in my
Speaker 10: skill sets, and you know, I'm a chef and I've
Speaker 10: learned so many different techniques over the past few years,
Speaker 10: and I really have grown in the regional cuisines that
Speaker 10: I know and the different ingredients that I know off
Speaker 10: the top of my head. You know, I'm able to
Speaker 10: put different dishes together based on different ingredients I've already tasted,
Speaker 10: and I can do that in my mind as opposed
Speaker 10: to not knowing how you know different things taste and
Speaker 10: kind of having like question marks, if that makes sense,
Speaker 10: you can kind of put the pieces together because you
Speaker 10: have more of a palette and it you know, it's
Speaker 10: that's been a huge ride for me over the past
Speaker 10: few years, just that accumulation of knowledge what kinds of
Speaker 10: things are good and bad?
Speaker 1: You do you work at like a like a restaurant
Speaker 1: of some kind or a food.
Speaker 10: Truck or Yeah, I run two different restaurants. I wish
Speaker 10: I ran a lemonade stand. Un run two different restaurant kitchens,
Speaker 10: one of them pretty laid back, but one of them
Speaker 10: pretty busy. Uh, it's it's just managing people. Yeah, Basically,
Speaker 10: kitchen workers are hard workers and you know, it's the
Speaker 10: backbone of society. But they don't make that much money.
Speaker 10: So like I people that I can't pay that high
Speaker 10: of a wage, so I lose quality people constantly to
Speaker 10: new opportunities. So it's just a revolving door of people
Speaker 10: that you train and leave, and train and leave, and
Speaker 10: it's just how it is, though you get used to it.
Speaker 10: It's crazy.
Speaker 1: You said you wanted to tell you said specifically on
Speaker 1: this thing that you wanted to talk about what you
Speaker 1: deal with on a day to day basis. Was there
Speaker 1: anything in particular that you had in mind.
Speaker 10: Yeah, definitely. You know, if you go out to a restaurant,
Speaker 10: and you know, I'm not trying to be disrespectful to anybody,
Speaker 10: but if you're at a restaurant and you're frustrated with
Speaker 10: the staff, keep it to yourself. You know, we're already
Speaker 10: doing the best that we can. Generally, not everyone is,
Speaker 10: but most of us are doing the best that we can,
Speaker 10: and we have minimal labor that we're allowed to use.
Speaker 10: You know, you're like, oh, well, why aren't there enough
Speaker 10: people we'll here? Well, it's because my boss said, I
Speaker 10: can only have this much labor on my clock. Ever,
Speaker 10: I'm sorry, you know, you can't. Don't get mad at me, please,
Speaker 10: you know, my my boss just tell me what to
Speaker 10: do and we all do the best that we can.
Speaker 10: And if you want to eat food, that you didn't cook.
Speaker 10: You got to wait and you have to be humble,
Speaker 10: or you've got to go home and cook your own food.
Speaker 10: You know.
Speaker 1: Sorry, Yeah, yeah, that's uh, I don't know.
Speaker 2: That's just a mess. That's it's getting getting food.
Speaker 1: I will say, the way that we get food nowadays
Speaker 1: is always at least faster than how we got food before.
Speaker 1: We had to actually kill chickens ourselves and extrapolate their
Speaker 1: their organs and uh, you know, pray to God to
Speaker 1: smite them with thunder to cook it. And now you
Speaker 1: just kind of yell at a guy and he brings
Speaker 1: you macerella sticks. So I think that this system we
Speaker 1: have right now, you know, even though some people think
Speaker 1: it's insufficient, I think it's pretty better than what we
Speaker 1: had before, even though the economy. Actually, I'm gonna I
Speaker 1: was gonna say, even though the economy is worse now
Speaker 1: than it was then. I don't know anything about history
Speaker 1: or the universe, but it's probably better than it was
Speaker 1: back when we were hunting things.
Speaker 2: There wasn't even money a.
Speaker 10: Man. Other than that, I would like to tell you
Speaker 10: know a story about a dishwasher that I had.
Speaker 2: Oh, sure, I go.
Speaker 8: Light on.
Speaker 10: I worked downtown. I had a really cool dishwasher and
Speaker 10: he was most definitely a crackhead, but he was a
Speaker 10: great guy. He just happened to smoke crack and come
Speaker 10: to work basically every day. But he would come to
Speaker 10: work every day in a three piece suit, uh you know,
Speaker 10: dress pants, button up shirt and a tie sometimes the best.
Speaker 10: And he would wash dishes in this super busy downtown
Speaker 10: restaurant and crush it every day. And he was amazing
Speaker 10: other than the fact that he would leave and do
Speaker 10: some drugs and then come back to work, but he
Speaker 10: would do this art. And last time I saw him,
Speaker 10: he was downtown and he saw he was selling his
Speaker 10: art on the street and he was making money and freedom.
Speaker 10: If you're out there, keep doing your thing.
Speaker 1: Wow, it sounds like crack is the best thing that
Speaker 1: ever happened to that guy and empowered him to do
Speaker 1: all these things.
Speaker 10: I sure hope. So I hope he keeps going on,
Speaker 10: maybe not doing the crack, but hopefully doing his art.
Speaker 2: Look, here's the thing. It's probably not the suit.
Speaker 1: Probably it's probably not the crack that gets him through
Speaker 1: the day, but.
Speaker 2: It's the one variable I can think of.
Speaker 10: Would we all got to have something, man, I wouldn't.
Speaker 10: I'm born and raised in Memphis. I've seen the spiral
Speaker 10: of the drug epidemic personally. I went to public school, man,
Speaker 10: people started doing cracking, like fucking middle school, dude. I
Speaker 10: had a pregnant girl in my sixth grade class, Like
Speaker 10: this is you know, this is real life. You know,
Speaker 10: crack is terrible. Don't do crack, don't do heroin love
Speaker 10: your friends, tell them to stop if they're doing crazy shit.
Speaker 1: I hope that that's on the menu of your restaurant,
Speaker 1: you know how they have like the about section.
Speaker 2: You should put that on that which part.
Speaker 10: Don't do crack?
Speaker 2: I already forgot it. Don't do crack. That's good.
Speaker 5: We'll listen to it maybe later.
Speaker 10: Love you all.
Speaker 2: Thanks Jordan, take Caren.
Speaker 10: But I really do appreciate you. Thank you so much
Speaker 10: for everything to man. Keep doing it as long as
Speaker 10: it fulfills you.
Speaker 2: By I'm gonna try. I'm gonna try. Thank you, Jordan.
Speaker 2: I appreciate you.
Speaker 10: Man.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, I don't know. I had a friend
Speaker 1: who smoked crack once and he said it was pretty good,
Speaker 1: So you know, take that for whatever you will.
Speaker 3: Hello, Hello, how are you.
Speaker 2: Good?
Speaker 5: How are you doing.
Speaker 1: I'm doing Okay, I'm a gecko on the computer. How's
Speaker 1: life going.
Speaker 6: It's uh, it's teetering right now, my friend teetering.
Speaker 2: Why Why is it petering?
Speaker 6: Well, just uh, it just feels like my world kind
Speaker 6: of crushing around me, simply because I'm in a dilemma
Speaker 6: where I run the family business and my pops is
Speaker 6: getting old and he's getting ready to retire and he's
Speaker 6: leaning towards our not leaning towards, but he's planning on
Speaker 6: giving this to me, and I'm just not feeling it,
Speaker 6: not anymore. Have done that for too long, and the
Speaker 6: only problem with me leaving is that if I leave,
Speaker 6: the door is closed, and eventually I school over my bent.
Speaker 5: So I don't know what to do.
Speaker 1: Okay, So you're telling me that your father has this
Speaker 1: repair shop. He is retiring and either you take over
Speaker 1: the business or the business closes.
Speaker 6: Essentially, I'm going.
Speaker 2: To give you my opinion immediately.
Speaker 1: It sounds like this is totally his problem, dude, This
Speaker 1: is not your problem at all. Uh, this is your
Speaker 1: dad's business. This is this is your dad's Let mean,
Speaker 1: I'll hear you out.
Speaker 2: What are we gonna say?
Speaker 5: We like?
Speaker 6: So the only problem is is that I'm gonna be
Speaker 6: leaving this to go do 'otentially the same thing, but
Speaker 6: I'm just gonna get paid more.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 6: That's that's my main like my main guilt, I guess,
Speaker 6: because like some of these thoughts, they're literally you can,
Speaker 6: like less than a mile away from here. I would
Speaker 6: physically pass by this location, you know, and I don't know.
Speaker 6: It's kind of tough to I don't know, to.
Speaker 2: Think about, Kevin.
Speaker 1: You're your own person, okay, you don't. You don't owe
Speaker 1: anything to your dad. Your dad's business is his responsibility.
Speaker 1: So you know, you have your own life and you
Speaker 1: make your own decisions that are the best for you,
Speaker 1: not just you know, to to service your parents. Uh
Speaker 1: tell me about your dad's reaction to all this?
Speaker 2: What is he doing? Is he pressuring you any any
Speaker 2: which way?
Speaker 6: Well, so, like essentially, like you know, it's been I
Speaker 6: don't working here since you know, I was essentially nine
Speaker 6: years old, you know, just helping around or whatever. So
Speaker 6: it's always been the idea. He's always put it into
Speaker 6: my mind that this was going to be mine. The
Speaker 6: only problem is now that I see once I get
Speaker 6: older and stuff is like his business mentality, this isn't there.
Speaker 6: So when I see that, you know, and I see
Speaker 6: like other shops in the same field, you know, doing
Speaker 6: these crazy things and advancing and everything, and I feel
Speaker 6: like we're constant. I told him that, and he kind
Speaker 6: of blew up at me, because, like I said, it's
Speaker 6: a it's a horrible reality. But the reality is is
Speaker 6: that if I leave, that's it. So he kind of
Speaker 6: blew up at me and essentially kind of tried guilt
Speaker 6: to me into it by telling me that. But I'm
Speaker 6: I mean the way he treats me, in the way
Speaker 6: kind of how it goes, you know, just I could
Speaker 6: be working a lot less and getting paid at least
Speaker 6: a little bit more or a lot more, depending on what.
Speaker 5: Specifically or where I specifically choose to build.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you told your father that, I'm sorry, did
Speaker 1: you say that your dad has business practices that you
Speaker 1: don't like.
Speaker 6: I'm not business practices he just doesn't have. He I mean, like,
Speaker 6: he's a smart man. This is his first business that
Speaker 6: he's had. It's just that I feel like he's gotten
Speaker 6: to the point where he got bored of the business
Speaker 6: and he's no longer trying to put more money into it.
Speaker 6: It's just whatever comes out of it comes out of it.
Speaker 5: And that's it.
Speaker 6: Which in my mind, you know, you have to put
Speaker 6: money in. You have to spend money to make money.
Speaker 6: You can't just be out of constant.
Speaker 5: Just like anything else.
Speaker 6: You have to put the effort in to get something out.
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, I mean Kevin, what I said. You know,
Speaker 1: it's still stands firm. Your dad not having a plan
Speaker 1: for you know, his business opening or failing.
Speaker 2: I mean, that's that's his problem.
Speaker 7: You know.
Speaker 1: It says you're twenty one years old, you're an adult,
Speaker 1: You're your own person. You can still love your father,
Speaker 1: you could still have a great relationship with your father,
Speaker 1: but your father can't dictate what you do with your
Speaker 1: life and the decisions that.
Speaker 2: You make you and you can't let them.
Speaker 3: Do that at this point, right.
Speaker 6: I mean, like that's what I've been thinking too. And
Speaker 6: you know, like my tool guys that come, because I
Speaker 6: have my tool bodies that come, and like my snap
Speaker 6: On and my mat Co and my Cornwall, they all
Speaker 6: come and I have had the same conversation with them
Speaker 6: just because they see all the same people in my field.
Speaker 6: So maybe they have like job openings or somebody looking
Speaker 6: for a job, and I talked to them and they
Speaker 6: all tell me the same thing. But it just feels
Speaker 6: like something in my heart or like something is just
Speaker 6: like stopping me. I know, like mentally, I know that
Speaker 6: I should I shouldn't like advance myself, I should be
Speaker 6: better for myself. Well, but I don't know what's stopping me.
Speaker 2: Let me ask you this.
Speaker 7: Have you.
Speaker 1: Have you ever gone against your father? Have you ever
Speaker 1: entered into a conflict with him or disagreed with him?
Speaker 1: Or I guess I don't want to. I don't want
Speaker 1: to say stood up to him because that seems a
Speaker 1: little too dramatic.
Speaker 2: But you know what I'm saying, Yeah.
Speaker 6: I get you, and and to be honest with you,
Speaker 6: like not really no, I don't know, just just how
Speaker 6: my family grew up, you know, just what my dad says.
Speaker 6: My dad says essentially just something I don't know. It's
Speaker 6: not like he beat me or anything. It's not like
Speaker 6: I was abused like torn like just it's just something
Speaker 6: like it's something that's a part of me. What my
Speaker 6: boy says, what my dad says, whether I like it
Speaker 6: or not.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And you know what, Listen while you're growing up.
Speaker 1: You know, when you're sixteen, you know, before you're eighteen,
Speaker 1: and and you know any time after the age of
Speaker 1: eighteen where you find yourself financially dependent upon him. You know, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's true. You know he's he's your dad, he's that's
Speaker 1: the rules, whatever. But this is not the case anymore.
Speaker 1: You're twenty one years old. You have your own skills,
Speaker 1: you make your own money, you're your own person. And
Speaker 1: you know, I feel like you might be having this
Speaker 1: block because you've always lived by the philosophy that you know,
Speaker 1: what Dad says goes. But now you are in a
Speaker 1: position where you have transcended that you're an adult, you
Speaker 1: can make your own decisions. And now I see it
Speaker 1: as an opportunity to have a rebirthing of your relationship
Speaker 1: with your dad that is based less upon you know,
Speaker 1: something authoritative or businessy or anything like that, and based
Speaker 1: solely upon he's your father and you love him, and
Speaker 1: that's that's the foundation of your relationship more so than uh,
Speaker 1: you know, anyone having control over over anyone else.
Speaker 6: Right, right, I mean, but I guess my other problem
Speaker 6: is my my my only other problement is recently because
Speaker 6: I told him this like maybe three four days ago,
Speaker 6: like when I finally growed up the courage to talk
Speaker 6: to him, he kind of started giving me the cold shoulder.
Speaker 6: So I can only imagine if I really left you,
Speaker 6: see what I mean. That's that's my my other other thing.
Speaker 1: About well, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, he's your dad needs to
Speaker 1: grow up.
Speaker 2: I don't know what else to say.
Speaker 1: I mean, if he's given you the cold shoulder, if
Speaker 1: he's being you know, a baby about it, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: at a certain point, and it's it's it's it's I
Speaker 1: know it's hard because you don't want your dad to
Speaker 1: ignore you.
Speaker 2: But you can't.
Speaker 1: You can't bend to that. I mean, that's fucked up
Speaker 1: that he's giving you the cold shoulder. That that's not right,
Speaker 1: and you you don't. You can't be out here rewarding
Speaker 1: that kind of behavior bye by giving into it and
Speaker 1: and eventually eventually years will go by, your dad will
Speaker 1: get over it, you know, but you you need to
Speaker 1: be okay with him giving you the cold shoulder.
Speaker 5: I mean, I.
Speaker 6: Knew, I knew this is this is essentially what everybody
Speaker 6: like everybody, it's a universe.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 6: I gotta do what I gotta do.
Speaker 2: Well, Kevin.
Speaker 1: Good luck to you, man, and you know, congratulations to
Speaker 1: you for for finally taking this uh uh big step
Speaker 1: toward you know, becoming your own person. I think it's important,
Speaker 1: it's it's important you do this now because you need
Speaker 1: to free yourself from your father so that you can
Speaker 1: move on with you know, the growth in your life.
Speaker 1: And I know it's a tough thing to do, so
Speaker 1: i'm I'm I'm excited for you that you're.
Speaker 2: Gonna do it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, thank you very much.
Speaker 5: You know that means a lot.
Speaker 6: I try to call you to the comminations will happen?
Speaker 2: Kevin? Is the anything else you want to say to
Speaker 2: the people the computer before we go?
Speaker 6: Yeah, if everybody can look in their closets, in their attics,
Speaker 6: in their mom's houses or guitar Hero guitars and dongleswe
Speaker 6: you be having a very hard time trying to play
Speaker 6: some goddamn guitar hero.
Speaker 5: So you got to do me that favor. That'd be great.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: If anyone can find this man an any guitar Hero
Speaker 1: or rock band instruments, please let us know so we
Speaker 1: can get into him.
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, post him online please and and don't charge
Speaker 6: one hundred fifty bucks. All right, that's kind of ridiculous.
Speaker 5: I'm just trying to play rock down.
Speaker 6: I'm not trying to side a business.
Speaker 2: Thank you for calling Kevin.
Speaker 3: Thank you.
Speaker 1: That's a tough situation, having to stand up to your parents.
Speaker 1: I'm glad that the people around kay when he said,
Speaker 1: this is what everyone's been telling me. I'm glad that
Speaker 1: people around him have been telling him this true. And
Speaker 1: I think people know at this point, you know, it
Speaker 1: sucks to hear that his dad is being a baby
Speaker 1: about it. And that's fucking really hard because because I
Speaker 1: think from a it's interesting from our perspective, From the
Speaker 1: outsider perspective, this feels like, this feels very easy. This
Speaker 1: feels like the the notion of Okay, my father doesn't
Speaker 1: control me comes very easy when you're looking at it
Speaker 1: from an outside perspective. But I'm trying to I'm really
Speaker 1: thinking about it from Kevin's position, where you know, he's
Speaker 1: twenty one years old, so for twenty one years, his
Speaker 1: brain has been fully conditioned that what his father says
Speaker 1: goes and now he you know, it's not as easy
Speaker 1: for me as you know, for me to say, oh, well,
Speaker 1: your dad hasn't known you. It's like, great, it's easy
Speaker 1: to say, but the reality is is this guy's got
Speaker 1: to now be tasked with breaking twenty one years of
Speaker 1: conditioning in order to move forward, which is tough.
Speaker 2: I think he'll do it. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I never know if people are gonna actually do any
Speaker 1: of these things, but I hope he does, and good
Speaker 1: luck to him.
Speaker 5: Everything again goes on the line, taking your phone calls
Speaker 5: every nine. Everything goes to his eye. He's teaching you
Speaker 5: cloud in the metery of life, but he's not an expert.